#and then i cried the whole day because i felt like such a loser
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Had an interview yesterday for a pretty competitive course and the guy started off with congratulating me for getting to the interview round and then not letting me speak, like literally cutting me off after every sentence and huffing and making surprised faces after every answer i gave him. don't select me, that's fine. at least don't make me feel bad about myself :(
#and then i cried the whole day because i felt like such a loser#shit happens#well cried because of other reasons too but this was the straw that broke the camel's back#🫐.txt#tonight on: am I getting too soft for the world or am I just going through something and should be kinder to myself
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Jurdan gets funnier and funnier the more you think about them and realize how much of a big loser both of them are when it comes to love.
Mfs get married to supposedly "form a trustworthy alliance" -> Cardan exiles Jude the next day to impress her, because apparently his rizz disappears when it truly matters 💀 -> Jude takes it seriously, stays in the human world for months and is salty af -> Cardan cries himself to sleep and writes pathetic little letters to her. Like wow you did that to yourself you dumb bitch 😭
And don't get me STARTED on their dumbass confessions. Cardan's was, I'm pretty sure, 80% on a whim. Like, maybe he had prepared the words in his mind but he didn't plan to confess to her right then and there at such a bad time. Says "well you probably already guessed as much" at the end then RUNS AWAY probably because he's overwhelmed and Jude is left standing there like???? No I fucking didn't guess you liked me lmao??? I'm dumb af bro, should've been this direct from the start :')
And Jude's is also hilarious because she says it kind of hurriedly as soon as they're alone, since she had promised herself to tell him the first moment they get together. Girlie confesses and CARDAN DOESN'T BELIEVE HER 😭 so homegirl has to EXPLAIN in DETAILS when she thinks she started to fall for him, why she started to like him, why she believed he didn't like her and why she felt the need to hide it. And ONLY after that whole ass explanation Cardan's finally like "omg!!! You liked me because I'm clever and funny?!?? Omgggg..."
Those fuckers were really married for months before fumbling their way through awkward confessions because they can't indulge in the thought that the other likes them. Like they were legit EMBARRASSED to admit that they like eachother while being MARRIED. Please this is so unserious, get real.
#the folk of the air#tfota#jurdan#jude x cardan#jude duarte#cardan greenbriar#the cruel prince#the wicked king#the queen of nothing
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Unfair - Hwang Hyunjin
Pairing: Hyunjin x fem!reader
Warnings: fluff, smut, teeny tiny bit of angst (if you squint), hyunjin being a softie and a romantic little shit!
Summary: After getting friendzoned, you rant to your best friend, Hyunjin, about how pathetic you are for not getting a date for Valentine’s Day. Hyunjin would never let the girl he secretly loves so much think so little of herself.
Word Count: 5.2k
MASTERLIST // my Ko-Fi
“Ugh! I’m so pathetic!” you cried as you busted inside your best friend’s room. “Like, so pathetic”
Hyunjin was laying on the sofa, lazily sketching something on his notebook when he heard your cries, making his head lift up to look at you. “What happened this time?” he asked with a knowing smirk.
You sat down on the couch with a huff and crossed your legs under your butt. “I thought he was the one. And he obviously was not” you grumbled.
“Who?”
“Soobin! I can’t believe it” you face-palmed yourself. “I- God! I thought he was into me. Like, he was flirty all the time. We’d go out to eat, which I mistook as dinner dates. He’d take me to the funfair. Shit, he even gifted me that giraffe plushie which I’m obviously stabbing him til the fucking insides are laying all over my floor” you snapped.
Hyunjin was pressing his lips together to contain his smile. Not because you were miserable, no. Because you looked so freaking cute when you were angry.
“Stop smiling, Hyunjin. I feel like shit”
Hyunjin chuckled. “You’re so cute when you’re mad” he said.
“Not helping here”
“Sorry, sorry” he said, placing his hands in the air in defense. “I’m sorry that happened to you, sweetheart. Come here” he cooed, extending his arms, making you sigh and crawl towards him as he wrapped his arms around your body.
“I’m so pathetic” you whispered, feeling your eyes stinging with tears.
“What? No” he shook his head. “Do you think you’re the only girl in the world that got her heartbroken or got her hopes up over a stupid boy that couldn’t see what was in front of him this whole time?” Hyunjin rambled on. “That’s bullshit”
You felt your heart melt at his words. “Thank you for saying that, Hyunjinnie. Really, but I think this time I’m accurately depicting myself. I’m a pathetic loser”
He just chuckled against your hair. “You’re being mean to yourself”
“I deserve it”
“No, you don’t. So what if Soobin doesn’t like you like that? There are tons of other guys who aren’t blind as him” he said.
“Yeah, where are they?” you asked angrily.
Right here, Hyunjin wanted to say. “You just gotta keep looking” Hyunjin said.
You nuzzled your head into his chest, inhaling his scent. You wondered what it would be like to be with him. You obviously did. It had been three years since you met Hyunjin, and you couldn’t get over the fact that you loved him. It wasn’t every day that you make yourself a friend who’s an idol, and every single person on the planet wants and longs to be with him, so you weren’t stupid. Your chances of being with him were slim to none. You got your dose of liquid luck that got you there with him, being his friend.
“I know. But I’m just so tired of missing and missing the target over and over again” you rambled on.
“I get that. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have to keep trying, Y/N” he whispered.
You nodded. “I’ve got no date for Valentine’s. Can you believe that?” you asked, almost to yourself. “That’s what’s pathetic”
Hyunjin chuckled. “I don’t have a date for Valentine’s either”
“Yeah, but you’ll be on tour. Besides, you got seven dates”
“No, ew” Hyunjin shook his head. “I love them, don’t get me wrong. But no, I’ll pass” he said, making you giggle. The sound made his heart clench painfully in his chest. You don’t know I’d give my life for you to continue giggling like that forever, he thought. “I’m sorry I’ll be away. I was gonna offer you to be my date. Figured we could finish watching the last episodes of Daisy Jones”
You sighed. “It’s fine. You gotta be a superstar, duty calls” you giggled. “I wish I could go with you, though”
“Yeah, me too” he nodded. “Why don’t you come, though? I’ll pay for your tickets”
“I got work, Jinnie. I know you’d pay for them. You did that the two times I went overseas to watch you guys in concert. Best experience of my goddamn life, by the way” you said, making him laugh. “But, no, this time I’ll painfully pass. I love my little shop”
You had your own art supply shop, where you sold canvases, acrylic paints and all sorts of stuff that any artist in Seoul would need. Hyunjin stumbled across your shop three years ago and he loved it. He always found everything he needed for his artworks. But the best thing he stumbled across in your shop was the cute vendor that was smiling at him, asking if that was everything he’d need, if he needed assistance or the way you smiled whenever he’d talk.
The attraction he felt was so real and so scary to him, but he loved it. He felt he found the one. And that feeling didn’t change. It probably won’t. Ever.
“I know you love it. I love it” Hyunjin praised.
You lifted your head up slightly to look at him. “Really?” you asked in a small voice.
He smiled and nodded. “Yeah”
You giggled, pressing your head into his chest once again. You let out a content sigh and then closed your eyes, feeling exhausted after crying the whole way back to his apartment and putting up with your feelings for the boy your were laying on.
<>
“You’ll stay here with Y/N, okay Kkami?” Hyunjin told his little four-legged friend that was sitting on the comforter. “You’ll be good to her, aren’t you? You like her more than you like me, anyways”
The comment made you giggle and pet Kkami’s hair. “He’s a good boy, Hyunjinnie. He’ll be okay here with me” you said.
“Yeah?”
You pressed your lips into a smile and nodded. “Absolutely”
“Great” he sighed with relief. “If you need anything, I wouldn’t say ‘call me’ because I don’t trust myself to be with my phone if you needed me, so I’ll just tell the guys downstairs that whatever you need, you can ask them. You can help yourself out with ev-“
“Jinnie” you stopped him with a laugh. “I do this everytime you go away for more than a week” you reminded him. “It is not my first rodeo”
“Okay, yeah, you’re right” he nodded. “You’ll be okay?”
“I’ll be fine. Now go! You’ll be late” you scolded him, pushing him out of his room.
He chuckled and turned around, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Love you!” he called as he made his way out.
“Love you! Have fun!”
“Thank you!”
You shut the door and then looked at Kkami who was comfortably sitting on the bed. “You’re gonna be my date for Valentine’s, Kkami” you sighed.
Kkami barked at you, making you chuckle.
“Yeah, I know. Me too” you said, pressing your fingers into your eyelids. “I miss him too. And he just left”
<>
ONE WEEK LATER…
Hyunjinnie: everything ok over there?
You smiled as soon as you heard your phone chiming with the personalized tone that Hyunjin had chosen for himself.
You quickly typed your answer back.
You: everything’s ok!! u?
Hyunjinnie: everything’s cool. i’m having so much fun, i missed touring honestly. but i miss u as well :(
Your heart literally melted.
You: you sweet little ferret. i’ll tell the kids.
Hyunjinnie: NO! please i’ll never hear the end of it if they know i’m a softie for you
You giggled.
You: for me and Felix, isn’t it?
Hyunjinnie: Yeah, you and Yongbokkie are the only ones i’m soft for.
You smiled and left your phone next to you when you heard someone coming inside the store. As the client finished their purchase and left, you heard your phone vibrating against the counter a few more times.
After the customer left, you quickly grabbed your phone.
Hyunjinnie: so, there’s only five days left for valentine’s day
Hyunjinnie: have you found a date?
Hyunjinnie: i’m sorry i’m sending so many texts. we’re currently having a mini break from sound check
You quickly typed your response, hoping he didn’t go back to sound check.
You: yes, i actually have
Hyunjinnie: oh…
The three dots appeared and then disappeared. Your eyebrows furrowed.
Hyunjinnie: who’s the lucky guy?
You: it’s actually someone you know pretty well
You: he’s been keeping me company these days. he’s lovely
Hyunjinnie: oh
You felt weird watching him reply to you. Wasn’t he getting it?
Hyunjinnie: what’s his name?
You: His name is Kkami. a charming little man ;)
Hyunjin didn’t reply for a solid 30 seconds, the longest thirty seconds of your entire life.
Hyunjinnie: oh lol. i really thought you got a date with someone real
Hyunjinnie: tell Kkami thanks for keeping my girl company
Hold up.
My girl?
Your heart clenched. And so did your core. But you weren’t going to admit that to anyone.
You: i’ll tell him
Hyunjinnie: y/n i gotta go :(
You: nooooo!!
Hyunjinnie: i don’t want to go. but i have to. i’ll text you later, promise!!
You: okay :)
Hyunjinnie: love you! tell kkami i love him too
You: we love you and miss u too hyune!!
You sighed putting your phone down.
My girl.
Yeah, you were not going to let that go.
<>
TWO DAYS LATER…
Hyunjin sat in his dressing room, exhausted after performing for thirty thousand people for 2 hours straight, holding his portable fan in one hand and in the other, his phone. He scrolled his Instagram feed and smiled when he saw that you had uploaded an Instagram story to your close friends.
He clicked on it and his smile got even bigger. It was a selfie that you had taken with Kkami, with a text that said: My favourite cuddle buddy ❤️.
He swiped up, quickly sending you a direct message, reacting to your instagram story.
@hynjinnnn: you two are the cutest!!
@y/n.jpg: thank u <3 we miss u jinnie
His heart melted reading those words.
He instantly clicked on your profile and started stalking your photos. It was unreal the effect you had on him. How every single time he looked at you, or thought about you, his heart would clench inside his chest. Hyunjin was so in love with you, he didn’t know what to do with it.
He clicked on a certain picture, one that did things to him. It was one that you took on a night out with your friends, wearing a short dress that made your chest pop up nicely. He licked his lips and sighed. How is it possible that a woman like you didn’t have a date for Valentine’s? Are men really that blind?
His mind instantly went to Soobin. He knew the guy. He was nice, but Hyunjin really thought the guy was dumb. Did he actually see what was in front of him? Didn’t he notice all of the things Hyunjin sees in you? How perfect you are?
Hyunjin shook his head.
He was going to do something about this. He wasn’t going to let anything stop him from you having at least a little something for Valentine’s. He’d be damned.
<>
VALENTINE’S DAY
You woke up from your slumber and immediately put a hand on your forehead, groaning as you sat up.
“Here goes my pathetically alone Valentine’s day” you said, hopping off the bed. You opened your closet and found the dress you had bought back when you thought you were going to spend Valentine’s with Soobin. “Yeah, you suck” you sighed, grabbing it and chucking it on the floor.
Kkami watched you with curious eyes and it made you chuckle.
“I guess I’m not that alone” you said, grabbing him and taking him with you to the living room.
You put the TV on, clicking on Netflix.
“Twilight it is then” you grumbled, and clicked on it.
As you got through the middle of the second movie, someone knocked on your door.
Your eyebrows instantly furrowed. Who was it?
You peeped through the peephole and saw the delivery guy holding a huge bouquet of red roses.
What the hell?
Slowly, you opened the door and smiled slightly at the delivery man.
“Hello”
“Hi, I’ve got a delivery for… Y/N Y/L/N? Is that correct?” he said.
Your eyes widened. “Yeah, it’s- that’s me. Who are those from?” you asked.
He checked the list and shrugged. “It… doesn’t say” he said, pressing his lips together. “I’m sorry”
“No, no, that’s okay. Do I sign?”
“Yeah, here-“ he said, handing you the paper and you scribbled your sign on it. “Thank you, have a great day”
“Thanks, you too” you said, as you took the flowers from
him and closed the door behind you. “Okay, what the hell?” you said loudly.
You placed them on the counter and saw that it had a card. You quickly grabbed it and gasped.
My muse,
Someone as beautiful and amazing as you doesn’t deserve to be alone on Valentine’s day.
I hope this makes you smile.
Hopelessly in love with you,
Hyunjin.
Your eyes started to water.
‘My muse’
‘Hopelessly in love with you’
Since when?
What does it mean?
Why would he tell you like this?
There was only one way to know that.
You quickly grabbed your phone and clicked on his contact.
You: what the hell???
You: the flowers? the note? what does it all even mean, hyunjin?
You patiently waited for him to answer, and about twenty minutes later, you got your answer.
Hyunjinnie: everything.
Hyunjinnie: it means everything.
Hyunjinnie: you mean everything.
You felt your cheeks getting wet by the stream of tears leaking from your eyes.
Hyunjinnie: i wasn’t going to let my girl be alone on valentine’s day. and as i can’t be there, at least i’ll give you a bouquet of red roses.
You smiled, biting your lip.
You: this is so unfair
You weren’t going to confess to him via text. No. You weren’t going to let that happen.
Hyunjinnie: what’s unfair?
You heard your phone chiming but you weren’t paying attention to it. You were too busy opening your laptop and typing on the airplane ticket website.
Hyunjinnie: Y/N???
<>
ONE DAY LATER…
Hyunjin’s day off was supposed to be relaxing.
But it was the complete opposite of that. He had spent the entire day sitting on the couch next to the window of the hotel room, his leg bouncing up and down and checking his phone every ten seconds to see if he had a message from you.
He had confessed his love for you.
And you said it was unfair.
What did that even mean? Unfair?
He sighed, brushing his hands over his hair, over and over again.
Hyunjin jumped when he heard a loud knock on the door.
“Who is it?” he asked.
“It’s Jisung, open up” he heard his friend on the other side of the door.
He got up with a groan and opened the door. “What?”
“Well, hello to you to, brother. I’m fine, thank you for asking” he said with a sarcastic smile, walking inside his friend’s hotel room.
“What’s that?” he asked, noticing Jisung had something in his hands.
“You didn’t come downstairs for breakfast or lunch, so I figured you’d be hungry” he said, extending his hand and offering him a bowl of raw ramen.
Hyunjin smiled and grabbed it. “Thank you, Ji”
“You’re welcome”
Hyunjin clicked on the electric kettle and poured the hot water on the bowl.
“What’s on your mind, Hyung?” Jisung asked.
Hyunjin sighed. “I sent Y/N a bouquet of roses for Valentine’s” he said and then looked down. “And I haven’t received an answer yet”
“Oh man” Jisung sighed. “I’m sorry”
“It’s okay” Hyunjin shrugged. “I mean, it’s not, but we’ll see” he said, grabbing his ramen and eating a little.
Jisung sat on the bed. “I’m sure she doesn’t want to do anything with you being so far away” he said. “I mean, as far as I know, that girl is obsessed with you. She’s always smiling at you. Whenever we talk about you with her, her face lights up. Even an idiot can see that”
“You’d know that, don’t you?” Hyunjin tried to light up the mood.
Jisung snorted and flipped him the finger. “Ha-ha, so funny” he humorlessly said. “But seriously, I know everything will be fine. Don’t torture yourself with the what-ifs”
Hyunjin nodded, biting on his food. “Thank you, Jisung”
Han smiled. “No problem, Hyung”
He got up from the bed and patted Hyunjin’s shoulder. He got out of the hotel room and as he turned around to walk down the hall, he saw you running towards him panting heavily.
“Ji- Jisung, hi!” you whispered.
“Y/N?” Jisung asked confusedly. “What are you doing here?”
“It- it’s a long story. Where’s Hyunjin?” you asked.
“That’s his room, 806” He pointed at the door on the left.
“Thank you” you sighed.
“No problem” he said, getting inside his own room. “See ya”
You waved and then nervously walked towards Hyunjin’s room. You let out a shaky sigh and knocked on the door.
Hyunjin got up from the hotel room couch, leaving his ramen on the table. Did Jisung forget something?, he asked himself, looking around his room.
He walked towards the door, without checking who it was and his stomach dropped when he saw you standing there, panting.
“Y/N?” he stammered. “What are you doing here?” he asked.
His thoughts were cut short when he felt you tug his head down with your hand by the nape of his neck down to crash your lips against his. His brain short circuited, but quickly put his hands around your waist, pulling you against his chest. You pushed him backwards, inside his room and he kicked the door shut with a thud.
His tongue ran over your bottom lip, bringing you back to reality. You needed him to know.
“Jinnie-“ you said, breaking apart from the kiss.
Hyunjin looked at you and then back at your mouth. “What?” he asked, before pressing his lips against yours.
You smiled, pulling away, and held up the card that was delivered with the bouquet he had gifted you. “This…” you whispered. You saw his eyes flickering with anxiety. “I’m in love with you, Hyunjin. I just… I never ever thought you’d love me back” you chuckled.
He smiled and pressed a loving kiss on your lips. “Of course I am. I’m crazy for you” he smiled against your lips. “You’d think I’d let a friend sleep in my bed, with my dog, and lend them my clothes, and let them cuddle with me?” he asked.
Well, no. Now that you thought about it, the signs were clear.
“Oh…” you said, realizing it. “I’m an idiot”
“Hey. Stop talking about yourself like that, Y/N. You’re amazing. Perfect, even. And so, so, so ethereally beautiful” he mused.
You pressed your lips together, looking down at your shoes with shyness.
Hyunjin brought a hand over to your cheek, caressing it. “I love you, Y/N”
You smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips, a long one. “I love you, my Hyunjinnie” you said against his lips. “So much”
After he brought your bag inside his room, you kept staring at him with lovey dovey eyes. He then turned around and you blushed, his stare making you nervous.
As he kissed you once again, his arms came around you, turning you around and walking you towards the bed with him. He carefully dropped you on the bed while devouring your mouth, which you could barely keep up. He was everywhere. His hands were roaming every single inch of skin he could find while he drowned himself into your drugging lips.
Before dropping himself on top of you, he grabbed the neck of his shirt from the back and pulled it over his head. His toned stomach made you gasp, as you’ve never seen Hyunjin shirtless. He smirked as he noticed your reaction, and he crawled towards you, pushing his face close to yours, in an intimidating manner.
“What is, hm?” he murmured against your mouth before pressing a kiss to your lips.
You licked your lips and raked your nails over his toned stomach. “You’re so beautiful, Hyunjin” you whispered.
“Says you” he chuckled.
“Yeah?”
You felt a surprising amount of courage that made you sit up and pull your own shirt over your head, leaving yourself sitting on the bed wearing your skirt and your pretty white lace bra that you chose for the occasion in case you were to get lucky.
His eyes visibly darkened and dropped to your chest. His mouth pressing against yours with passion made you gasp against his mouth. He pressed you back against the mattress and his hands came up to grope your tits, making your back arch in pleasure.
“You don’t even know the things I’ve been wanting to do to you ever since we met” he whispered against your mouth. He then pulled away and continued his trail of kisses down your neck. “Fuck, you’re so perfect”
His words made your stomach flutter with warmth and you carded your hands through his hair.
“Hyunjin” you whispered into the air.
“What?” his voice came all muffled by your skin.
“Touch me, please” you sighed.
Your voice made his knees buckle. His hands went towards your jeans, undoing them and almost ripping them down your legs. He smirked slightly, watching you from above as you laid on the bed only in a matching set of white underwear.
His tongue came to lick his lips and then pressed a wet, long kiss on the skin of your stomach, making you gasp a little. His mouth started to trail down the kisses down your navel, and onto the band of your panties. He tugged the band with his teeth and let it snap back against your skin. His long fingers grabbed the hem of your panties and dragged them down your legs.
His gaze immediately fell on your core, and it made you self-conscious. You didn’t know why. This was Hyunjin, someone who never made you feel bad about anything. A true gentleman.
Your thoughts vanished when you felt his palms on your thighs, pushing them apart so he could get a good view of your core. He bit his lips and sighed.
“You’re dripping, princess” he murmured, his fingers scooping up some of your wetness and he pressed them on his tongue, licking them clean. “Fuck, I need to taste you”
You didn’t even have time to think, because he was pouncing on you, and started devouring your pussy like it was the last meal of his life. You couldn’t even moan properly, your breath hitching on your throat as you processed what was going on.
His nose bumped with your clit, while his tongue kept pushing in and out of your entrance. Your hands went straight to his hair, pulling every once in a while, making him moan against you.
“Hyun- Hyunjinnie” you moaned, arching your back. “Fuck”
“God, I love it when you say my name like that” he said, pulling away from you and slapping your core, making you yelp. “Say it again”
He then dove right back into business, making your eyes roll back into the back of your head, while your toenails kept digging into his back.
“Hyune” you sighed, as you felt your orgasm closer and closer. “Hyune, I’m gonna come”
“Come, baby. Come all over my face” he whispered, continuing his ministrations.
Your head violently pressed against the mattress as your back naturally arched while your orgasm hit you like a truck. Hyunjin moaned at the taste of your orgasm, lapping up every single drop and not letting anything go to waste.
With uncontrollable gasps, you opened your eyes to find Hyunjin on top of you, his face wet from your orgasm. He kept licking his lips and staring at you with the most enamored gaze ever.
“What?” you asked, with a little smile.
He pressed a kiss onto your lips and then bit your bottom lip. “Nothing. I just was admiring my girl” he said against your lips.
You smiled and your hands went down to his jeans, unbuckling his belt and trying to stick your hand inside his pants, noticing his hard rock erection against the fabric.
His hand stopped your movements. “I wanna come with you, inside of you” he whispered, making you blush.
“Then what are you waiting for?” you asked, arching an eyebrow as you found a slight ounce of courage.
He smirked, his hands going over your back and unclipping your bra, carelessly throwing it away behind his shoulder. He could only stare.
He couldn’t comprehend how beautiful you were.
You felt nervous, and you grasped onto one of his hands, moving it towards one of your breasts, making him squeeze it and brush his thumb over a nipple, making you moan slightly.
His other hand joined as well, and then his mouth. He sucked at one of your tits, while the other one was being assaulted by his hand.
“Jinnie, fuck me, please” you whispered into the air.
“I will, baby, I swear I will” he muttered against your chest, moving onto the other one. “Your tits are fucking amazing, I swear”
You bit your lip to contain a smile.
He lifted his head from your chest and pulled down his jeans along with his boxers, making his cock slap against his stomach. Hyunjin was big, you weren’t going to lie. And most definitely, what you were expecting.
His hands went to the pocket of his jeans, pulling out his wallet. He took a condom from there and quickly ripped it open, putting it on.
“I can’t believe I’m here” you said out loud.
Hyunjin finished putting the condom on and crawled back on top of you. “Believe it, baby” he smiled and pressed a long, loving kiss on your lips. “It’s happening”
You felt him nudge against your entrance and you bit your lip, holding onto his shoulders. He pushed his cock in and you gasped, arching your back.
“Fuck me, you’re tight” he whispered against your neck. “So, so tight, baby”
“You’re big, Hyunjinnie” you whispered.
“You okay?” he asked, lifting his head and letting his hands brush your hair away from your forehead, the action made your heart flutter. “Am I hurting you?”
You quickly shook your head. “No, no, I swear”
He smiled and continued with his movements, his hips kissing your pelvic bone with each thrust. You could only moan against his neck and hold on to him.
“Harder, please” you pleaded. “I know you want to, give it to me like you want to” you repeated over and over.
Suddenly, he pulled out and grabbed your hips, turning you into a face down position. He slapped both your ass cheeks and grabbed your hips, so your knees were resting on the bed with your chest flat on it. He pushed his length inside of you from behind and thrusted into you so hard it made your vision cloud with white spots.
“Yeah, fuck!” you moaned against the sheets.
“Yeah, you like that, baby?” he asked, sweat dripping from his body. You couldn’t answer, really. You couldn’t even form a proper sentence due to his erratic thrusting. Hyunjin slapped your ass again and it made you yelp. “Answer me, Y/N”
“God, yes, I love it” you moaned.
“Good” he groaned, grabbing your hair roughly and pulling you into his chest. His hands went around you, one on your neck and the other one around your stomach, holding you tightly. “I love you, God, I love you” he whispered against your neck.
Your hands carded through his hair and you held onto him. “I love you, Hyune” you moaned as he kept hitting your sweet spot, over and over. “Fuck, I’m gonna come”
“Good, come around me. I wanna feel you” he groaned.
Your back arched as he kept kissing your neck, while his hands gripped onto your tits. With a long moan, you orgasmed around him, without any help from his hands.
He gently laid your body down, on your stomach, while he kept thrusting in and out of you, searching for his own orgasm. Hyunjin gripped your hips as he felt himself getting closer to the edge.
“Fuck, fuck, baby” he kept whispering as he thrusted one, twice and then emptied himself into the condom. Once he had finished, he carefully laid next to you after taking out the condom and throwing it away inside the trash, his hand going to brush your hair away from your face, so he could stare at you. “How are you feeling?”
“Fucking amazing” you sighed with a smile.
He chuckled, caressing your cheek.
You stared at him while biting your lip. “I love you, Hyunjin. So much”
He smiled and pressed a kiss to your lips. “I love you, my muse”
<>
ONE YEAR LATER - VALENTINE’S DAY
You opened your eyes slightly, shifting under the sheets and immediately groaning at the pain that you felt in between your legs.
It was all his fault.
He had bought you a new set of underwear and he had ripped it away from you as soon as he saw you in it. And he was the one to blame for the soreness inside your thighs.
You heard soft pattering coming from the hallway and you sat up to see your boyfriend coming inside your shared room, holding a tray with breakfast. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, only a pair of boxers, which made you bite your lip at the sight.
“Hello, my muse. Good morning” he smiled putting the tray on the bed and crawling on the bed to sit next to you. “Happy valentine’s day” he whispered before kissing your lips.
“Happy valentine’s day, my sweet boy” you kissed him again and again, not able to get enough from him. “I love you. And thank you for this”
“I love you. And you deserve it” Hyunjin told you, grabbing his cup of coffee and taking a sip.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve this. All of you. But I’m so thankful I have this. You” you told him, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.
“God, me too” Hyunjin sighed.
You smiled, feeling so content with the life you had.
Kkami took you both by surprise by jumping on the bed, making you giggle. “Hey, little man” you smiled at the pet, who wagged his little tail and then barked.
“You wanna know what he said?”
“Oh, God. What?” you asked laughing.
“He just said, happy valentine’s day, mommy”
“Mommy? I’m his mommy?” you asked him.
“Of course” he nodded, kissing your lips. “I wouldn’t want anyone else”
#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hwang hyunjin x reader#hyunjin#stray kids#skz x you#skz x reader#stray kids x reader#skz smut#stray kids smut#hyunjin imagines
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somber fem!reader
i just can imagine how much ur boyfie misses you after u two break up :(
he'll go to a seedy bar and drink up until he feels numb on his body, his musky colgone is now replaced with a reeking scent of jack daniels whiskey as he looks completely wasted. holding the whole bottle lazily on his hand before he pours himself another cup of the brown liquid onto the well designed glass cup.
he even babbles about you to the bartender, showing him a picture of yourself that he keeps in his wallet everyday. "you see this- *hic* fine babe? yeah- *hic* i-i lost her two days ago..." he slurred out, eyes dropping low as he looks like he was about to throw up. the only response the bartender could make is either awkwardly chuckling or just saying a small "aw..." because really, he doesn't have the time to have a therapy session with a drunkard.
"s-she like uh-... broke up with me for i don't know what reason, uhmmm- ugh, i miss her s'much..." he whines, acting like he was about to cry. he misses you, he really does. numbing all his pain away from endless amount of shots from the whiskey cup and just slurring out incoherent words that clearly don't make sense. someone comfort this man :(
but as he tips over the barstool, he finally manages to leave the bar and head over his car. murmuring incoherent words and stumbling over the pavement flooring before he finally slams his body against the car door. he struggles a little bit, letting out a strained groan as he sits down at the drivers seat. poor man is tired, and he feels so lonely without your presence beside the passenger seat. you were his passenger princess, and he can't seem to get over you.
he's acting like a total loser right now.
he takes out his wallet again, flipping it open to reveal the picture of you. you were peacefully sleeping on his bed, hair tousled around the plush pillows, and a little puddle of drool seeping into the pillow covers. he chuckles at the picture before it was replaced with silent cries, tears dripping down his cheeks as a few droplets drip down to his jeans. he can't believe he lost you, over god knows what argument you two had both had.
he misses you so much that while he was crying he could feel his cock throbbing against his jeans. he was craving your touch, the way your hand palms his cock and stroke him so deliberately and deliciously with such delicate hands. god he misses it.
so without further ado his cock already sprung free from its confines, one hand holding the wallet while the other worked its way down to stroke his cock. he felt so desperate that he spits on his cock as a use of a lubricant, letting out a throaty groan and string of whispers, talking to himself and praising himself as if you were still there with him. pathetic whimpers fill in the spacious car, the windows slightly fogging up as his vision was already at haze.
all that his mind was clouded of was with images of you.
he still feels empty, even if he's bringing himself close to an orgasm. but he tried, he really tried to think that you're the one stroking his cock instead of he himself. "g-god i... ugh- i miss you s'much baby, holy fuck- please come back..." he murmurs under his breath, jaw clenching as his eyebrows pinch together, letting go of his orgasm. it wasn't particularly the best he could've had but... at least it was something he could do while thinking about you.
but honestly, he just wishes you were there with him. he wishes he could go back in time and fix things properly instead of being put up into this situation. but i guess time will tell, and it's how god had written its story between you and him.
💌: gojo satoru, geto suguru, nanami kento (who would break up with him?), hiromi higuruma, toji fushiguro (hear me out...), dazai osamu, odasaku, chuuya nakahara, manjiro sano, draken, rafe cameron, jj maybank, shinichiro sano, ++ your favs!!
#( xoxo ) ✶ rosalina !#jjk x reader#jjk smut#bsd x reader#bsd smut#tokyo rev x reader#tokyo rev smut#obx smut#obx x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru smut#geto suguru smut#geto x reader#nanami smut#nanami x reader#hiromi x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#hiromi smut#toji smut#dazai x reader#odasaku x reader#dazai smut#chuuya x reader#chuuya nakahara smut#manjiro sano x reader#manjiro sano smut#draken x reader#draken smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron smut
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ILYILYILY YOUR MEGUMI INSTA POST WAS BEAUTIFUL I NOW NEEEEDDDDD A YUUJI ONE 🙏🙏🙏🙏
YUJI FANGIRLS RISE UP!!! indie I LUV YOU TOO!!
DATING YUJI ITADORI INSTAGRAM!
details!
instagram posts w/ comments while dating Yuji Itadori!
a/n OBVIOUSLY these are just pictures off of pinterest, reader can be however you imagine!
a/n Americanizing this one because my homecoming is next week and I think Yuji would be such a good hoco date
a/n Yuji plays football and track/cross country((idk the difference, sue me)) (GO WITH IT.)
a/n modern!no curses!AU
m. list
aoi.todo replied to your story: the friendzone is a terrible place for my brother. luvfromy/n: huh!?! No way! Yuji doesn't like me like that there's no way!! We're just super best friends! aoi.todo: oh I see. aoi.todo: Say, Y/n, whats your type? luvfromy/n: uhhh well... selfless, enthusiastic, and incredibly kind people. someone who's like the sun aoi.todo reacted "👍" to this message
yuujithetiger replied to your story: No need to thank me for hanging out with my favorite person :DD luvfromy/n: :D Being with you is my favorite part of my day yuujithetiger: same here!!
yuujithetiger · 9w
430 likes Liked by megumi.fushi, barabara, and luvfromy/n
yuujithetiger She was the first to run on the field after I got a PR!! :DD I luv my best friend!
luvfromy/n I luv you too!! I'm so proud and happy for you! yuujithetiger luvfromy/n THANK YOU!!! i think I did better because you were cheering for me... just saying! luvfromy/n yuujithetiger well I'm glad I could help then! :DD
barabara nice job loser
aoi.todo THATS MY BROTHER!! choso.kamo aoi.todo 🤨🤨🤨
luvfromy/n · 6w
1.2k likes Liked by yuujithetiger, barabara, choso.kamo, megumi.fushi, and togetalks
luvfromy/n two weeks before homecoming! Had to cheer yuji on at his practice <3
yuujithetiger i always perform better when you're in the stands luvfromy/n yuujithetiger guess I'll just have to keep coming 🙂↕️🙂↕️ yuujithetiger luvfromy/n guess you do :/// (:DDDDDD)
barabara tell your man to put a shirt on 🤮🤮 luvfromy/n barabara HUH? MEAND YUJI ARENT DATING!?!?!??! barabara luvfromy/n oh! that's interesting...
okkatsuyuta its like hes a machine when you're cheering for him! please keep coming to our games and practices!! luvfromy/n okkatsuyuta wouldn't wanna be anywhere else! I'll always be cheering for Yuji!
luvfromy/n · 6w
1.4k likes Liked by yuujithetiger, megumi.fushi, aoi.todo, barabara, and choso.kamo
luvfromy/n I almost CRIED! I'VE LITERALLY WAITED FOR THIS FOR SO LONG!!!
yuujithetiger MY HEART WAS POUNDING SHOWING IT TO YOU. I'M SO GLAD YOU SAID YES luvfromy/n yuujithetiger WHY WOULDNT I???? yuujithetiger luvfromy/n I THOUGHT I WAS IN THE FRIENDZONE! luvfromy/n yuujithetiger I THOUGHT *I* WAS IN THE FRIENDZONE!!
megumi.fushi finally barabara megumi.fushi literally. choso.kamo barabara listening to him talk about her nonstop was giving me a headache 😭😭
aoi.todo THATS MY BROTHER.
yuujithetiger · 5w
510 likes Liked by megumi.fushi, barabara, choso.kamo, aoi.todo, and togetalks
yuujithetiger the most beautiful girl in the world <3
luvfromy/n the most handsome boy in the world <3 yuujithetiger luvfromy/n homecoming was so fun! It felt like a dream being with you luvfromy/n yuujithetiger NO REAL! I was so nervous the whole time!! but being with you made it better (as it always does) yuujithetiger luvfromy/n I'm glad I could make you feel not so nervous :D luvfromy/n yuujithetiger you really are the sun <3
© https-milo. please do not repost, steal, copy, or modify my works!
Thank you so much for reading <3
#jjk#jjk yuji#jjk yuji itadori#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk smau#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen smau#anime#anime x reader#anime fluff#anime smau#yuji itadori#yuji#yuji smau#itadori#itadori smau#yuji itadori x reader#yuji itadori fluff#yuji itadori smau
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Help Me Out?
Word Count: 1.7k
Summary: You're popular and you ask the smartest girl in class to help you out with your math work, and how could she say no? She was confused as you start to actually become friends. Because she didn't understand why someone like you would take an interest in someone like her.
Cw: reader cries bc of a mean teacher, kinda loser!ellie, reader fights with her fake ass friend.
A/n: this is actually based off a real life experience, I was sadly the loser in this situation 😔 also I obviously dramatized it for the story but yeahh, anyways enjoy! There will be a part 2.
You had to be the most confusing girl Ellie has ever met. She wondered why on earth you spent your time talking to her, when you were so popular. It wasn't unknown that Ellie was a lesbian, actually it was pretty much what she was known for. But you didn't seem to care.
Math was never your strong suit, in fact you'd always struggle with it. Ellie, however, was amazingly good at it. She had her heart set on becoming an astronaut one day, and so she figured that she'd have to understand math. Joel helped her to do just that, but he also made sure she excelled.
Anytime your math teacher spoke, it sounded like complete gibberish to you. You'd even cry some nights, you know on the days she would yell at the entire class about how stupid they were. It just felt like she was singling you out. And not to mention all the passive aggressive notes she'd leave on your assignments or tests. One day, you figured why not ask Ellie for help?
She was utterly confused. Why would someone like you talk to someone like her? And out of your own free will.
"Ellie? I'm really sorry to bother you, but can you help me out..?" Your voice was quiet and you sounded timid almost.
At first, she was silent. She kind of just stared at you. But eventually, she came to her senses.
"Yeah of course! What's up?" You smiled, she spoke so kindly to you.
"Here, let me just-" you got up and stood at her desk, "number 6, and basically everything after it. I just don't get it.." You sigh softly.
"Okay, this is what I wrote." She said, merely handing you her paper.
"No, I don't want to copy yours. Can you explain it to me?" You ask, looking over at her now with pleading eyes.
Ellie nodded, giving you a thin-lipped smile before she began to talk and point things out. You wrote what she told you to and hummed every now in then with understanding. Eventually she'd helped you complete the whole thing, and you were beyond thankful.
This kind of interaction would continue to happen between the two of you for the next couple weeks. Your teacher had grown.. annoyed with this behavior. For some unknown reason she just had it out for you, because when you walked into class today, she announced a seat change.
Ellie was already in class, so she got up from her former seat and stod at the front of the room along with everyone else. You made your way to stand beside her, crossing your arms out of frustration.
As your teacher began assigning new seats, you sighed. Ellie looked over at you, but said nothing. So you decided to start the conversation.
"God I hate her. She's probably doing this just so I'll fail." You whisper.
"Whay do you mean?" Ellie whispers in return.
"You've been.. helping me out lately. I guess she just can't stand to see me succeed." You frown softly.
Ellie turns to face you once again, noticing how upset you really were. She didn't know what to say, or do. So she kept quiet and waited for her new seat assignment. After a few more minutes everyone was settled in their new seats.
You and Ellie were sat just about as far away as possible. This was definitely personal. Throughout class, you struggled tremendously. God this was just what your stupid math teacher wanted.
That day, you took it upon yourself to find Ellie at lunch. If she was shocked that you'd even speak to her, just imagine how insane she found it when you sat at her lunch table. Usually she sat alone, not because she didn't have friends, but they all had different lunch hours.
She felt so entranced by you, every word you said felt like it was burned into her brain. She admired you, truly. Even if she thought she had no chance with you. Ellie figured you were straight. Everyone knew you had a boyfriend last year, until you didn't. That was beside the point. Falling for a "straight" girl wasn't the first thing on her list, but that's what was happening.
"I literally hate her!" You complained.
"I know," Ellie nodded. "She is pretty annoying."
While Ellie wasn't fond of your math teacher either, she'd lie if she was. She'd agree with anything you said. God she felt pathetic.
"Fucking tell me about it.." You scoffed.
Ellie was confused when you say with her everyday for the rest of the week, but she wasn't complaining. She'd gotten to know you better. And she was quite impressed with who you really turned out to be.
She always thought high school girls like you were mean, but you were so sweet to her. Ellie had enjoyed spending more time with you, and she had no problem helping you out with your math work too. You were starting to get the hang of it, but it still didn't make complete sense to you.
Friday was your breaking point, you were just beyond frustrated by your work. Your teacher was busy on thr phone, so you figured why not. And you stood and walked over to Ellies desk. She blushed deeply as you'd gotten very close to her and whispered in her ear.
But you couldn't have been trying to flirt, you were just trying to be discreet, right? She began to explain the problem to you, perfectly ad always. And you were ready to thank her and start working, but before you could, your teacher called out your name angrily.
"What are you doing out of your seat. You have got to be one of the worst students I've ever had. Get back to your seat, now!" This time, her words genuinely hurt you.
Ellie watched you nervously, noticing how you'd gone silent and the way your bottom lip quivered. Her eyes widened and she felt so terrible when you began to cry. Your face ran red hot as you could feel everyone staring at you.
Ellie sighed softly and stood up, unsure what she should do. But she didn't have to guess because you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around her, resting your head on her shoulder. Ellie felt so awkward, and, she felt dizzy almost. Holding her arms around you felt so unreal, but god did it feel good.
Your teacher ended up sending the both of you to the hallway. Where you'd sit against some lockers, your knees pulled to your chest and your head resting in your arms. Ellie sat beside you, crisscross applesauce as she looked over at you and waited. She was waiting for you to say something, anything.
"Sorry.. I'm just overreacting.." You'd finally whisper.
"But you're not," Ellie was quick to reassure, and she placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, "she's been so mean to you for so long. Your completely valid to be upset by her.." her voice was quiet and soft.
"Thank you.." You smiled as you whispered, resting your head against Ellie's shoulder and wrapping your hands gently around her forearm.
She'd just nod in response then try and breathe regularly, which felt impossible when you were all over her like this. God, what did you do to her? After some time passed the bell rang and you two made your way to lunch. As you walked your interlocked your arm with Ellie's, which earned you a few glares.
You were relieved to just be able to sit down and have lunch, and relax. But that peace didn't last long when one of the girls you used to sit with decided to approach you and Ellie. She sat beside you and stared at Ellie as if she were some kind of alien.
"So, this is what you're busy doing? Hanging out with.. her?" Olivia spoke with disgust.
Your brows furrowed with confusion, what was her issue? You scoffed softly before answering.
"Yeah." You begin, your tone was anything but kind, "she's way better company than any of you ever were. You guys are mean and.. fake. Ellie is nice and she actually makes me feel good about myself." Ellie watched with amazement as you talked about her so highly.
"Whatever, you're a loser now anyways. We heard you cried in class.." She started to laugh at you.
"Jesus, who cares!" Ellie finally interjects, you watch her nervously, "look I know you think the most important thing in life is whether people think you're cool or not, which believe me, you're not, because you're just like every other basic bitch you hang out with. One day you're going to realize that wow, you peaked in high school, and it all goes downhill from here. Now would you please leave us alone?" Her words came off confident and snarky.
But you saw how her hands shook in her lap. She was so nervous. You smiled at her, she did that for you. Nobody ever did that kind of stuff for you. She really was.. good company.
While Ellie had fallen for you first so clearly, you fell a lot harder. Some part of you always knew you wanted to be more than just her friend, but it wasn't until now that it really hit you. As Olivia got up and walked away, Ellie could tell how you looked at her differently.
"Ellie.." You whisper, and she nods, "you're the best." You settle on a friendly compliment, because oh my God!
You liked Ellie, you'd never expect that. Not because she was a girl, but just because she was Ellie. And it's not that she was unattractive or anything. But you two were just so different. It didn't make total sense, if any.
"Oh, thank you.." She blushed.
"Hey, let's hang out after school." You spoke with excitement, "I could sleep over!" Ellies eyes widened at that.
Immediately she thought about the two of you.. in the same bed. God what would she do. She'd have to figure it out, because of course, she agreed. You couldn't wait for the school day to end.
#ellie williams#ellie williams x reader#ellie x reader#ellie williams x f!reader#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams x you#ellie x you#ellie x y/n#ellie x fem reader#highschool au
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fic rec friday 17
hi!! welcome to fic rec friday. every week, i pick five fics i have bookmarked and rec them with a little review. check them out!
Drew Tanaka's True Love Connections by @buoyantsaturn
Will smiled. "I have an appointment next door with the, uh… Matchmaker lady?” He winced at his own awkwardness, trying to bite back the embarrassment he felt. “Well, actually my friend set it up for me, but-- Sorry, do you know anything about her? The matchmaker lady, not my friend, I mean. I’m just not sure what to expect, you know? I’ve never, uh, done something like this before.”
THIS WAS SO SICK I LOVED IT!!!!!! flowershop au with a twist oh yes ma’am. also im so pumped drew was in this every time i see her im like hello my love how are you
2. just desserts by @thegoldenappleofdiscord
It’s just a cupcake, Nico reminds himself. Surely that justifies breaking into the infirmary at the break of dawn. or: nico's love language is baking and will solace gets a lot of cake as a result.
end note hate me GIGGGGLIIING. also i am OBSESSED with this author but i haven’t read the solangelo book yet so i haven’t read a lot of her stuff and i’m DYING to. this was as sweet as nico's baking fr!! i'm writing less of a note on this fic (altho i love it) bc the WORDS i have to say about the next one,,,
3. caught in the river of tears that i cried by @thegoldenappleofdiscord*
In all honesty, it was really for the best that Will didn’t think about all the strange things that sometimes happened around him. After all, his mama had more than enough on her plate already. He was a good kid, and it was best everything stayed as it were. (Though admittedly, the flock of flesh-eating maniac pigeons, men with hooves, and the growing darkness in his veins might just make this a tiny bit more difficult than he anticipated) or: will can only push down a part of him for so long (will has plague powers, but he's known it from the very start.)
UPDATE WHEN UPDATE WHEN UPDATE WHEN REESE PLEASE 😭😭i am genuinely so obsessed with this fic and the WAY everything is woven together....like fear is a driving force!! you can feel it!! this is one of those starred fics fr bc it Changed the way i wrote and characterized will. he is fr a character who has been controlled by fear his Whole life actually. of the world and what it takes from him. of the Fates that do not care for your fragile love. of the things they are forced to do. of the precarity of life. and perhaps most intimately and ardently Himself, and the abilities he does not want to have, the life he does not want to live. the parts of himself that do not fit in the mold he has Built for himself and Forced himself into. and this fic shows that so so beautifully like this story is Woven.....i think about it literally all the time it's insane
4. a handful of almosts by @thegoldenappleofdiscord
He’d said it so easily: “Best friends don’t do that to each other, Will.” It had been a throwaway comment after Will decimated him in a card game, which was usually Nico’s forte. Following that had been a furious, “Besides, it’s war. Entirely luck-based. Winning this game doesn’t mean anything. Stop laughing – why the hell are you laughing?” He’d mostly been laughing because of Nico’s expression – eyebrows drawn tight, mouth twisted in an adorable scowl – but also because of the sudden elation pumped into him like helium. They were best friends – and maybe someone else would be hopeful for more, and maybe one day he'll pursue it (he did want it, had wanted it for a long time) but for now, he’s content where they are, sitting in Nico’s room and cursing at each other through a deck of cards. or: 5+1 of will solace being a pining loser
A HANDFUL OF ALMOSTS!!! WHAT!!! every once and a while u just hit a title that Hits u u know. like a handful of almosts. yeah. what a deeply poignant and tragic thing. how fitting for the pjoverse, a universe of people who are haunted by their almosts. god. and then to turn around and make this story FLUFFY?? MAKE IT THE CUTEST THING IN THE WORLD??? "will solace and his rose coloured glasses" REESE!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!
5. Damage Control by @nikkira
“I couldn’t save Lee. I couldn’t save Michael. I couldn’t save Silena.” “You saved Annabeth when she was stabbed, right? And Annabeth was kind of imperative to the whole saving the world effort. The people you save go on to do things and help people and save people. When you lose someone, you lose them. But when you save someone, you save a dozen more people.”
"i dream of the people i could not save. they're mad at me." oh i am UNWELL. ill i tell you. i read this line and had to sit down for a little while like actually. one thing about will solace is that he never stops punishing himself and no one got that like this fic nine years ago
thank you for joining me this friday!! happy reading!!
#if any of you are not busy.#and want to send me reminders on thursdays or something.#i would be forever in yoru debt.#i am so sorry that it is sunday. anyways.#pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#hoo#heroes of olympus#pjo hoo toa#will solace#nico di angelo#nico di angelo & will solace#nico di angelo/will solace#nico/will#will/nico#will solace angst#solangelo#solangelo fluff#will solace has plague powers#fic rec#fic rec friday#FRF#longpost
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Day 4 - Hide and Seek
Ortho & Reader (TWST)
a/n: hi yall day 4 is out. this was fun to write! i dont think i made it as “scary” as i wanted it to be, but i dont think its bad. ANYWAY, i picked reader because the obvious choice would be idia, but im already writing for him two other times this month so i wanted someone else, which means… u. LOL. also, things i want to mention: idia is mentioned A LOT here and thats because ortho cares about him a lot. ik hes not just like, all about idia and thats all hes there for, but i think him mentioning idia a lot just works best in this scenario. another is that this is meant to be platonic because ortho is a like,,, kinda like young asf so i dont really think he should be shipped with people. sorry this note is SO FREAKING LONG. so ill stop yapping now gn everyone
——
“come out, come out, wherever you are!” ortho exclaimed in a gleeful tone, but somehow his words set your nerves aflame.
you crouched behind the tree, waiting for him to pass, and half-debating your life choices. you hadn’t played hide and seek in ages, but you felt nervous at being caught, especially when ortho said that there should be a penalty for whoever loses.
you didn’t really know what that penalty entailed, but since it was ortho, you figured why not? but now, hiding and seeing him search for you made you think you should’ve asked.
but really, who knew ortho would want there to be a penalty for the loser! it was to make things for fun, he had said.
he called your name, and you pursed your lips together, not daring to even breathe. ortho had a lot of functions that humans couldn’t do, and maybe superhearing was one of them… you really didn’t know so you would rather not take your chances.
you peeked out from behind the tree, sighing in relief when you didn’t see him anymore. does that mean you won?
“found you!” a shrill voice called from behind you.
“GAH!” you cried, scared of your wits as you lose your balance and fall forward on the ground. after a second to process, you turned slowly, looking at ortho. “aw, you found me.”
“mhm! and with three minutes to spare, which means i win!” ortho added, looking like he was having the time of his life. you smiled at that, but still…
“guess you do. so what’s my penalty?” you asked, hoping it wasn’t too extreme, like trying to convince idia to hang out with you for the whole day. you swear, it was impossible to have him talk to you for anything longer than an hour, even if it was about his interests.
“i’m gonna tickle you!”
your eyes widened at that, completely flabbergasted. of all things in the world, that was the last thing you expected.
“….tickle?!” you squeaked, awkwardly. did you hear wrong?
“yep! i think it’ll be fun!” ortho replied, not commenting on the nervousness and embarrassment you were feeling.
“fun?” you asked, but you guessed you could see where he was coming from.
“unless you don’t want to..” ortho said, pretending to be upset. you inwardly groan, he can really be so unfair sometimes, because how could you say no when he was looking so upset.
“fine, yes, i accept my penalty!” you cried, unable to take the guilt. you did feel much better though, when he began beaming.
“you will! yay!” he exclaimed, flying towards you. “maybe if i tell my brother about your tickle spots, you guys will be friends!”
“w-wait, huHUHUH?!” you cried, feeling his cold fingers begin to squeeze and knead at your torso. tell.. idia?! is this him trying to get information so you and idia could be friends?! in a way, it was sort of heartwarming to see him care for idia so much, but at the cost of your dignity? brutal. “stahahap, dohohont tehehell him!”
“why not? he’s ticklish too! you guys can have tickle fights!” ortho explained, and you can hardly believe how… open he is about exposing idia like that. and besides that, huh??
“nohohoho gahahahaha i’m tihihicklish!” you laughed, when he began to travel towards other spots.
“yes, you are reacting quite a lot when i tickle you!” ortho giggled, almost teasingly and clearly amused.
“plehehehehease!”
as he continued tickling you, he would note down spots that were more effective and spots that weren’t. the worst part was that he was saying this out loud. talk about embarrassing….
“you’re so ticklish here!” he teased, and it felt like you got even more ticklish. how was ortho so good at tickling anyway? probably from idia? he did say idia was ticklish…
a part of you realized you weren’t completely opposed to having a tickle fight with idia sometime. you didn’t have a lot of time to think about it before ortho because to tickle the spot that had always driven you crazy.
“W-WAHAHAIT! nohoho mohohohore! mehehercy!” you shouted, feeling overwhelmed very quickly and almost as quickly as you shouted it, ortho had stopped.
“that was fun, huh?” ortho smiled into his hand, as you tried to catch your breath.
“it wasn’t terrible,” you admitted. “a suitable penalty, i guess.”
“hehe, i hope we can play again sometime!” ortho said, and you could tell that you guys most definitely would. and not only that, but something told u that idia would be joining next time, whether he wanted to or not. you chuckled a bit at the thought.
“yeah, i hope so too,” you replied.
#tickling#twst tickling#twisted wonderland#twst#tickle fic#jai’s drabble#jai’s fic#lee!reader#ticklish!reader#ler!ortho#reader insert#platonic#augtickletober2024#tickletober#tickletober 2024
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Wishing well- Oikawa Toru x Reader
fluff/angst? a bit bittersweet. this feels like a very shitty piece. might delete. based on a song I really like.
"I threw a coin in the wishing well; I thought it was free.”
Sunlight peeked through the wooden slats near the well, casting a golden glow that reminded you of a certain someone’s eyes. The gaping well beneath your fingers seemed to peer up at you, its depths reflecting the silver shine of coins that almost blinded you. You wondered who else had thrown a coin, what they wished for, or, as in your case—for whom they wished. The 500 yen coin between your thumb and finger suddenly felt so heavy, as if begging to join the others inside. So, you threw it. Let it go, like that one boy you so dearly loved.
“I wrote you a letter, baby,
Signed it from me.”
The letter sat in the book, lying lifelessly as if it did not contain the words you wished to utter to him—words you’d never said, words that required more courage than you could ever muster. You still remembered writing it a year after he was gone. It wasn’t his birthday, New Year’s, or even Valentine's Day, but you still wrote it, signing it, “from me,” knowing your ‘lovely’ handwriting was quite distinguishable.
“Yn-chan!! What is this? I cannot read a word!”
“What are you talking about, Shittykawa? I knew you were blind, but not this blind.”
“a) Rude. b) I bet you a ramen bowl that no one other than you can read your handwriting. Don’t pretend I haven't caught you squinting at your notes trying to read what italic mess you’ve conjured up.”
“Hmmph!” With a huff, you took it back, ignoring the cries of “I was just kidding, Yn-chan!!” and “Yn-chan, please!”
“I’m looking around this town,
Everything’s changed.
That old liquor store has been sold away.”
Your ‘secret bridge’ is gone. A whole road has been built atop it. The water beneath it is now solid brick. The old grandma you’d meet on your way home has moved to the city with her grandson. The cat who would purr into Oikawa’s hand looks at you every day, as if asking where that loser is. Everything’s changed—for better or worse, you’re yet to know.
“I see your reflection in every scene.
I miss your long brown hair just blowing for me.”
Peering at the glass window, you somehow saw his reflection behind you. A part of you wished to turn around, but the wiser part didn’t want to be disappointed, so you looked ahead. Wind entered through the window, and the image of brown hair flowing flashed into your mind. Fluffy brown hair blowing in the wind—it was unfair how one could be blessed with so many things. You couldn’t even be mad because, at the end of the day, it was your love who was the blessed one, and you were the only one getting to admire his beauty. So, with a sappy smile, you looked at him like you always did.
“If love was a feathered wing,
I hope you’d see,
There’s a whole wide world even if it ain’t with me.”
Though these moments are bittersweet, it feels nice to know you’ve grown up. You’re not that same 17-year-old sneaking out to meet someone your parents didn’t know about. You’re not the same 17-year-old saving money to buy Tooru charms, little bouquets, and keychains for his bag. Now you’re 21. You’ve learned how to deal with idiots, stand up for yourself and others, manage deadlines at work, and made new friends. A journey everyone makes, and just like that, you hope he is doing the same. Learning, experiencing the little joys of life, the hardships, and battling each one with grace. Though a part of you wished you could be by his side when he plays his first match in university to cheer him, to be part of the audience when his serve hits the opponent's court—you’re glad he can experience these moments.
“So long to the summer.
You were always my friend.
So long to my lover.
You were there till the end.”
And now summer’s almost gone, marking the third year without you, friend, lover. The sunlight slowly fades as the sun begins to set, making the park chilly. Walking out of the park, you knew this wishing well would not bring him back into your arms, but maybe, just maybe, you will keep wishing.
#haikyuu#fluff#haikyuu fluff#tooru oikawa#hq oikawa#hq x reader#hq angst#oikawa x reader#oikawa tooru x reader#oikawa angst#tooru angst#haikyuu bittersweet#wishing well#walters#oikawa tooru angst#Spotify#tooru oikawa x reader#oikawa x reader fluff#oikawa x reader angst#oikawa argentina#tooru x reader#tooru x reader fluff#tooru x reader angst
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Exposure Therapy and Being Independent
Something I heard years ago that still sticks with me is “being brave doesn’t mean being fearless- it means doing things even though you’re scared of doing them.”
That’s something I’ve come to live by as I navigate life with severe anxiety, and it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot today.
In the last few months I took to exposure therapy to lessen my arachnophobia. It became too intense for me, and I decided I wanted to change that. I really didn’t like feeling helpless whenever I’d be alone in the house with a spider in the bathroom; no dad to come save me- his 22 year old daughter.
Maybe it’s a toxic state of mind, but I don’t like relying on people. I don’t ever want to be completely dependent on someone else, and that desire has led me to learning things I normally wouldn’t have any interest in (how to use a compressor, how to unclog the shower drain [hair], etc.)
Maybe I shouldn’t phrase it like that. It’s not that I don’t like relying on people; it’s more so that I want to be independent. And one of the things I could never be independent about was spiders.
I felt a bit ridiculous calling my dad to come save me from a tiny eight legged creature as a 22 year old. So I decided it was time to change!
I started using exposure therapy. I wouldn’t call my parents to rescue me from a bathroom spider anymore; I’d tell myself I would deal with it myself no matter how hard it was, no matter how long it took to hype myself up to do it.
It was MESSY at first. I fully cried from fear the first time I killed a spider on my own- and I didn’t stop trembling until an hour later, but I did it. I did it all on my own!
From that point on, I kept doing that. I’ve always been a bit unlucky when it comes to finding spiders, of course 🙄 so it wasn’t hard to practice.
Then when helping my mom garden, I told myself if I found a spider outside, I’d let it crawl on my hand. I didn’t want to, but I wanted to feel familiar with them. I wanted to make myself comfortable.
The first time I let a spider crawl on my hand, I was absolutely sloshed in the basement of a frat house. But I still did it. And then I killed it- which I’ve started feeling bad about doing. I don’t kill them if I can help it these days.
A few months later here I am, able to hold my own against the tiny crawlers. I still don’t like them and I still get scared, but I can DO it. I can do it on my own, and I’m proud of myself for that!
So now I have a different mission, my next fear to run through.
Public spaces.
I have anxiety, have had it my whole life, and after a year and a half of being on anxiety meds, I’m finally weening off. And I feel good. So, I decided it’s time to put my effort in healing to the test.
I love rollerblading. There’s this roller rink I’ve been going to since I was a kid, and I’ve always gone with friends or family. Never ever alone. Because I feel like a loser if I go alone- but.. my friends these days either don’t like roller skating or don’t know how and don’t want to learn- which is fine, everyone is entitled to their own opinion! I’d never force them to go with me for my sake; I don’t ever want to put my friends in a situation that makes them uncomfortable.
Which is why I’ve been hyping myself up over the last month to go by myself. To be independent. And for some reason, this has been so much scarier than killing spiders.
For three weeks now, I’ve tried to convince myself to go, and didn’t. Tonight it’s open and I’m trying to persuade myself to go. I’m not sure if I’ll succeed, but I really want to.
I’m scared- terrified even, of going alone. Why? I don’t really know. I’m scared of what people will think of me; going to a roller rink by myself. “She must not have any friends”. I’m scared of what they’ll think of my appearance. “She’s too big to do this”.
But no one has ever said those things to me. No one has ever even implied they think that way about me. And why do I care? These are strangers; I don’t know them and they don’t know me. My friends and family love me, and that’s all that should matter.
But this is something I’ve been battling my whole life; and it’s hard to get over! But I’m trying, I’m trying to be brave and face my fears head on. I’ll fail time and time again, but so long as I keep trying, I will succeed.
I’m being brave these days, and I’m proud of myself for it. It’s hard to be brave, but if the payoff means I can enjoy the things I love without fear, then it will be worth it!
#chatting longer (thoughts)#anxitey#mental health awareness#actually mentally ill#actually anxious#arachnophobia#spider mention
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white girl rant
mc tavish scottish accent i hate mini doorways i can’t see if someones comin in until they’re in the middle of my room like jeez stop giving me anxiety i love when i wake up and my dog is on my bed. i know it’s because im the only one who allows her to sleep on my bed but i like to think that in the middle of the night her brain just thought of me and went ‘i wanna go sleep next to her’ i know it’s not the case she’s just bored of sleeping on the hard floor yet she always falls alseep in my sister’s bedroom she prefers to go there just to be beside her oh my god the only thing that makes her finally go in my room is discomfort. but when she wakes up she asks for cuddles and to be pet a bit and i like to imagine she’s my dog only and she’s mine and she gets me and she’s not my freaking dad’s favorite daughter. and she prefers my dad he made me so upset today i cried and i felt ashamed and like a loser because i asked him several times to sign me up to a tennis class to try it out and he did and then i panicked so much i couldn’t do it because i dont want to be alone with a man but then it was gonna be a woman days later so i said yay but the days flew by and i realized to matter who i can never find what to say and im awkward and ugly and my whole lower face skin is peeling away and my teeth are fucked up and my chin skin is flayed raw and bright bloody red and i have acne and dark circles and an embarrassing smile and i can’t play tennis for shit. for. shit. so i acted all moody teenager and i thought my dad was gonna be like you know what it’s fine if you dont wanna do it i don’t get why you changed your mind but that’s okay i’ll just cancel it. he didn’t. he was aggressive and mean and purposely shamed me in front of the family and reminded very loudly the price even though he didn’t even paid yet and my sister had to go for me and i sat there watching her be so extraverted and comfortable with a stranger when i know i wouldn’t have been able to say a word that didn’t sounded weird and wanting to cry every second and burst in tears and my dad was so so mean and usually he gets me, and my sister saved me and went i got home i burst into tears in my room and he just wanted me to try a new thing and i just wanted to cut cut cut and why on earth am i this fucking awkward loser with my earphones in and too big black hoodie like im some kind of pseudo rebellious annoying emo kid i just want to be pretty and funny and shine like why do i the worse part is i kind of really wanted to try tennis. and i think i would’ve been good. i think would not have made a total fool of myself thing is whatever i do i am a fool anyway, i am a fool for even thinking for one day of my goddamn life i could have not ruined everything. my dad looked at me weirdly the rest of the evening and i wanted to yell maybe im reminding you of your loser son you lost to drugs no shocker we get along i also want to lose myself and you saw my scars you know there’s something wrong with me and there’s something wrong with him and with you and with all of us and wherever your blood is. i like my dad, he’s a good father but at the end of the day he’s a man, and not a better one than the others. if i have good grades and a pretty face let me tell you there is NOTHING you can complain of me. i am working on my appearance to be prettier to not embarrass you anymore but one day you will have nothing to complain about and i will do whatever i want and you will try to say what changed and i will say it’s not of your business anymore you can introduce me to anyone and say yes she’s my daughter she is clever pretty she has friends she reads and she jogs and i will be perfect and i will throw plates at your head and i will be the worse and no one will know. montgommery forever and ever and ever and i will blow up and i will become a doctor and have a boyfriend and you will say we used to laugh and i will say you were there but somehow the moments when i NEEDED you to understand me you didn’t. you got me but never got me. i cant stop seeing you as a man no matter how fathe
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I am loving Pearl so far, beautifully written, but WAIT because I have to know what the letters said 😭😭😭
thank you, anon! <3 i appreciate your sweet words 🥹 and thank you for asking, it inspired me to actually fill in this gap - hope you enjoy!
content warnings: best friends to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, mature themes, adult language, death of a parent, topics of grief, emotional hurt / comfort, self-doubt / insecurities - unedited - if i missed anything, pls let me know!
pearl masterlist
November 19, 1984
Eddie,
Sitting back in my dorm feels almost surreal. Everyone around me is going about their lives as normal, and I know I can’t be mad because obviously to them nothing’s changed, but how am I expected to join in normality? To just pick up where I left off at the start of the month?
You know what my chem professor told me? ‘We’ve all lost someone. The trick is to not make it your whole personality.’ In a way that makes sense to me. It’s logical. I can’t let my dad’s passing define me. And he obviously would want me to move on with my life. But Eddie, my heart bleeds.
This grief… This grief is swallowing me whole. This grief has embedded itself into my core being and on most days, it’s fucking consuming me. I lost a parent, a protector, a friend. There are memories I’ll never get to make because he’s gone. I really lost a piece of myself. How come no one seems to get that?
You get that, right Eddie? I know you understand. You always understand.
I miss you. I miss my dad.
P.S. Excuse this tear stained paper. It’s a mess. I’m a mess.
P.P.S I’m sorry for running off on you the day of the funeral. It was just… a lot.
November 22, 1984
Eddie,
Nothing makes sense anymore. (Also, I know I just wrote you, but I haven’t sent that letter yet so you’ll get both together and can respond to them as one.)
I’m trying to catch up on the material I missed and the words blend together before my eyes. Well, I only have myself to blame. My mom offered for me to take the rest of the semester off and start fresh from the new year, but I thought the distraction would help. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
I’m so sad all the time. And you know what the worst part is? Aside from the nightmares and this restlessness I’ve felt since the funeral, I just can’t stop thinking about you. What is Eddie doing, who is he with, does he think about me too?
Well, do you? God, this is fucking stupid. I know you do ‘cause you fucking call me everyday and I can’t bring myself to answer or call you back… Stupid…
I also think about our last moment together often… Actually, please ignore this letter, Eddie. Don’t respond. Like I said, nothing makes sense anymore, including my thoughts.
I miss you.
November 27, 1984
Eddie,
I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring your calls. I’m sorry I’ve had my roommate make up stupid excuses for me, that’s so lame. Most of all though, I’m sorry I haven’t called you back.
You’re trying to be there for me and I’m pushing you away. That’s shitty of me and really unforgivable. But the thing is, I think I’m doing it because I know you’ll always forgive me. That’s even shittier of me. I’m awful.
You deserve a better friend, Eddie Munson. You deserve the world and I only wish I could give you that. Instead, you’re stuck with a girl who runs away from uncomfortable situations and hurts you in the process.
I wish I could go back to the day of the funeral and change
November 30, 1984
I spent the entire day listening to my mom cry over the phone — tell me, does it make me heartless for not shedding a single tear? Thinking now, this is the first time I haven’t cried since the funeral.
Anyway, I’m failing the semester. Surprise, surprise.
Also, Jonathan and Nancy came to visit. Why didn’t you come with them? God, why am I such a loser? Won’t speak with you over the phone, but gets mad when you don’t take time from school to come see me. I’m sick of myself.
P.S. Thank you for regularly doing the groceries for my mom and helping her around the house. You have no idea how much that means to her, and to me. I love— Thank you, Eddie.
December 4, 1984
It’s been a month since my dad died.
The grief hasn’t surpassed. If anything, it’s gotten stronger. My roommate has to force me to do basic human things like eat and sometimes even shower. She’s really been my rock here these last few weeks. You’d like her, I think. She couldn’t be more different than you in style, but she’s funny.
I know you probably don’t have a high opinion of her now, considering she’s helping me avoid you, but—
I should really call you back. I’m sorry.
December 10, 1984
I haven’t sent a single one of these letters. You’ll probably never read them and know how truly awful I feel for ignoring you.
Eddie, how come things have gotten so complicated? You’ve done nothing wrong. It’s all on me. I wish we could go back to that day at Lover's Lake when you played your guitar for me. That was bliss.
I miss you, my Bobby McGee.
December 14, 1984
Eddie, you didn’t call today.
I shouldn’t be surprised. Not like I’ve given you a reason to call.
I wonder if you’ll even want to see me when I come home for the holidays. Probably not. That’s okay though. That’s okay…
December 19, 1984
Eddie,
Perhaps I’m saying this a little too late, but I appreciate you. Thank you for being my best friend and the entire reason why I know I’m going to be okay.
I think I’m in love with you. No. I know I am.
And I’m going to give you all these letters. Hopefully, you’ll read them in front of me so I can see your reaction when I say:
I love you, Eddie Munson.
I’m coming home for the holidays. I’ll come see you and I’ll apologise. With any luck, you’ll forgive me for being a cold-hearted bitch. With any luck, although I probably don’t deserve it, you’ll be my person again.
I'm yours, forever.
thank you for reading <3
& tagging some cool people that expressed interest in this lil series: @cactusangie , @spenciesprincess , @capitanostella , @ashlynnkennedy , @ms1oftheboys
pearl masterlist
#these are actually a little sad#pearl (eddies version)#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x female character#eddie munson x fem!reader#bestfriend!eddie#eddie munson x best friend reader#best friends to lovers
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Disconnected and Self Worth😭
06/19/24
The people in my circle keep showing me all this love and are there for me. Doing things for me and expressing their dearest feelings and intentions for me …. However, inside all I feel is “just let me go please” I just wanna fall into an abyss and drown. I HATE this awful feeling. I believe these people care because I don’t have a choice. They’re all I have and yet I get so caught up in the past, ruminating when these men lied to me, decieved me, rejected me and treated me like I’m not worthy to exist. 😓 Not just one of them but 3 of them made me feel like a complete loser. ❤️🩹 I know it’s not true!!
Men that I loved. I didn’t want to love the 1st one, Jake. I wasn’t attracted to him at all but some conversations we shared were really good and comforting but all the rest was of him attacking me at every corner. Calling me a racist and a bigot. Treating me like I’m only good enough for sex. Exploiting my nudes on his social media to “get back at me” for not wanting to be his whatever he wanted to be. He made creepy comments to me like, “If I ever got you pregnant, I would marry you…” 🥴🥴 uh… yuck. Never. I would NEVER let you touch me but he was always there in my face for YEARS. I blocked his number more than once but some how I always found myself talking to him again. There was just so much mystery that turned into history.
Then Cody was there when I posted a suicide note and that’s a HUGE DEAL!! He talked me off the ledge, got my trust but then shattered my trust… I knew Jake was creepy but somehow thought Cody was special and not a creep. I believed Cody was just having a hard time and the way he showed up for me originally, I thought Cody had my back… however, there were times in conversation I could sorta sense cody had a little jealousy for me and low-key he was putting me down but it was a grey line. However Cody ghosted me and I lost all heart. I was a dead woman walking for months. I saw no light or hope and some days even questioned if I was breathing.
5/6 months later, I meet Andrew… Andrew appeared so young and innocent. Often treating me like his caretaker. Making me feel constantly needed and wanted. Coming to me with his cries and using me for comfort. He played upon my ability to be nurturing and caring. I became crazy over the idea of me being his source of care and love. I wanted to spoil him and give him all of me. He wasn’t so “innocent” though. He was just sly and cunning with me. Getting me to constantly praise him and be at his beck and call. I believe now he had a hidden agenda the whole time. He was never going to support me or marry me. His whole intentions seemed to be based off of superficial gratification and to tare me down. I had so much to offer and he wanted to take it all and shred it. Maybe I’m wrong but that’s how he made me feel. After we break up, he’s still finding excuses to talk to me and just like Jake, makes me feel like I’m only good for sex but nothing else. Then he wanted to put me away quietly because he had a new girlfriend and I felt he was adding me to his trophy case of “prizes” and acting like, “Oh this is my prize I won and she can sit nicely on my shelf but I’ll only acknowledge her when I feel like it.” Nooooo 😣😭😠 I’m not going to sit on your shelf and wait for you. I broke up with him when I realized probably I was just a fun game for him. 💔💔💔
After these men, I still believe in love. I still got married to someone else and I’ve been forcing and pushing myself to believe in it all and to give it my best shot. Trying to convince myself I can trust people still and that I’m safe. I know I blocked Jake and Andrew’s number and if either of them tried to bother me through another way, my new man would probably threaten them. (He’s threatened Andrew once before) ugh I’m trying so hard to be ok. I’m NOT giving up!!! I’m trying ONE DAY AT A TIME ❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
#self worth#shadow work#im trying my best#my story#emotional abuse#mental abuse#mental health#healing from abuse#unpacking#healingjourney#healing journal#life journey#life lessons#real life#online relationships#self awareness#heartbreak#self reflection#Personal post#personal vent#disconnected#self discovery#self improvement#processing emotions#toxic relationship#toxic love#betrayal trauma#trauma bonding#trauma#one day at a time
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Echoes of Destiny: A Journey of Love and Redemption
Eddie Munson x FemaleReader
Word Count: 4659
After a decade away, you return to your hometown for a high school reunion. While there, you're confronted with past heartache, reunite with your soulmate, and embark on a journey of forgiveness, healing, and newfound love.
10 years!?! It had been 10 whole years since graduation. 10 years since Y/N packed her bags and left this town behind. Yet here she stood, outside the doors of Hawkins High School. Why had she come back for a measly 10-year reunion? Was this a bad idea? She decided to walk to the picnic table in the woods before heading inside. The same table where she met Eddie Munson for the first time, at the age of 14. He was 16 at the time. She stared at the table, wondering again why she came back here. Sitting down, Y/N looked at her wrist. The soulmark was just as bold as it was the day it showed up.
E-D-D-I-E M-U-N-S-O-N
Why did he have to be her soulmate? Why did her best friend have to fall in love with him? Why did she have to be such an ugly loser back then? Y/N stood up and straightened her knee-length black dress. It accentuated her curves perfectly. After leaving this town, she started to care about herself. She lost 50 pounds, her skin cleared up, and she gained confidence. But even with being as beautiful as she currently was, she was still single because no man wanted to be with someone who had another man’s name printed across their wrist. A man who would never love her.
Y/N sighed and headed back towards the building. After gathering every bit of mental power she could muster, she made her way to the gymnasium. The room was packed, and she recognized a few faces. “Y/N Y/L/N is that you,” said a familiar voice. She turned to see Mrs. Carter, her 12th-grade math teacher. “Hi Mrs. Carter, how are you,” she said. “I’m great, retiring this year. Only got a couple more months. It’s been, what? 10 years, since the last time I saw you. I heard you’re some big hot shot lawyer now,” she said. “Yeah, just about 10 years. Yeah, I’ve got my own law firm out in San Francisco,” she said, giving her a hug. “Well, it was good to see you Y/N,” Mrs. Carter said before walking away. Y/N turned to see everyone’s eyes on her, and suddenly, she was back in high school. Being laughed at, being bullied and belittled. She didn’t know how long she’d been standing there when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned expecting another teacher, but came face-to-face (well, face to chest as he was a whole foot taller than her) with the last person she wanted to see. “Hi, Y/N,” Eddie said. Y/N stood there staring at the ground, refusing to look at his face. She turned to walk away. “Y/N please, can we go somewhere and talk,” Eddie asked, catching her wrist. She just looked at him dumbfounded. He took her silence as a yes and pulled her out into the hallway. “Y/N… I… Y/N will you please look at me,” Eddie pleaded. Slowly, Y/N raised her eyes until they met his. “I wanted to apologize for everything. I never meant,” Eddie began. She didn’t know what came over her, but before she knew what was happening, her hand was colliding with his face. “Fuck you,” she said as tears started sliding down her face. Without another word, she ran out of the school and into the woods. She sat down on the picnic table and cried. Why did she come here? This was a horrible idea. Fuck this reunion, fuck this town, and fuck Eddie Munson, she thought as she climbed into her car and sped out of the parking lot.
Y/N hadn’t felt like staying with her mom and stepdad, so she’d gotten a motel room. She was just laying in bed flipping through TV channels when there was a knock on the door. Groaning, she got up and answered it, immediately wishing she hadn’t. She slammed the door closed. “Y/N, please let me explain,” Eddie pleaded through the closed door. “Go away Eddie! How did you even know I was here,” she asked, holding back sobs as she slid to the floor. “I went to your mom’s thinking you were there, she told me where to find you,” Eddie said. “Please Eddie, just leave,” she pleaded. “No! I’m not going anywhere until you let me explain,” Eddie said. Y/N knew he was serious, so reluctantly, she got up and opened the door. He walked in and sat on the chair beside the bed. Looking down, she realized she was wearing nothing but a tight silk nightgown. “Well, explain then,” she said as she grabbed her robe off the bathroom door and slipped it on.
Eddie’s eyes flickered with a mixture of sadness and determination as he took in the sight of her, wrapped in the robe, the hurt still evident on her face. He took a deep breath, as if gathering his thoughts, before speaking.
“Y/N, I know I messed up back then. I was young and stupid, and I didn’t know how to handle my feelings. I was terrified of how much I liked you, and instead of dealing with it, I ran away. I thought being with someone else would be easier, less complicated. I didn’t want to face the truth.”
Y/N crossed her arms, her expression guarded. “And what truth is that, Eddie?”
“The truth is that I loved you,” Eddie said, his voice breaking. “I loved you then, and I still love you now. The day you left was one of the worst days of my life, and I’ve regretted not fighting for you ever since. Seeing your name on my wrist every day was a constant reminder of what I lost.”
Y/N felt a tear escape, but she quickly wiped it away, not wanting to show how deeply his words were affecting her. “You say you loved me, but you were with someone else. You let me feel like I was nothing.”
“I was an idiot,” Eddie admitted, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “I thought I could just ignore it, that the soulmark didn’t mean anything. But I was wrong. Every time I saw you, every time I even thought about you, I felt this pull. I tried to push it away, to pretend it wasn’t real, but it was always there.”
Y/N’s heart was pounding in her chest. She had waited so long to hear these words, yet now that they were here, she didn’t know what to do with them. “Why now, Eddie? Why did you wait until now to tell me all this?”
“I was scared,” he confessed. “Scared that you wouldn’t believe me, that you would hate me. But when I saw you tonight, looking more beautiful than ever, I realized I couldn’t let you walk away again without telling you the truth. I know it’s a lot to ask, but can you find it in your heart to give me another chance?”
Silence filled the room as Y/N weighed his words. She had spent so many years nursing her wounds, building a life for herself far away from Hawkins and the pain it held. But seeing Eddie tonight had brought everything back with a force she hadn’t expected. She took a deep breath, her decision forming.
“Eddie, I don’t know if I can just forget everything that happened,” she said softly. “You hurt me deeply, and it took me a long time to move on. But I also can’t deny that there’s still something between us. Maybe we can start over, take things slow and see where it goes. But you have to promise me that this time, you won’t run away.”
Eddie’s face lit up with hope. “I promise, Y/N. I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right.”
The sincerity in his eyes broke down the last of her defenses. Slowly, she nodded, allowing a small smile to grace her lips.
Eddie’s shoulders relaxed in visible relief, and he stood up, closing the distance between them. “Thank you,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. He reached out, hesitating for a moment before gently taking her hand in his. “Can we start tonight? Maybe over coffee? Or even just a walk?”
Y/N considered for a moment. The years of hurt couldn’t be erased in an instant, but maybe, just maybe, there was a chance to heal. She nodded. “Okay, Eddie. Let’s go for a walk.”
They stepped outside into the chilly night air, the silence between them comfortable but charged with unspoken words. They walked slowly, the crisp leaves crunching underfoot, the sounds of the town muffled by the stillness of the night. For a while, neither of them spoke, just absorbing the presence of the other.
Eventually, Eddie broke the silence. “Do you remember the first time we met at that picnic table?”
Y/N smiled faintly. “I do. You were playing your guitar, lost in the music. I was too shy to approach, but you looked up and waved me over.”
Eddie chuckled softly. “I saw you standing there, looking so intrigued and yet so hesitant. I had to invite you over. It was like I felt this… connection.”
Y/N looked at him, the warmth of his smile lighting up his face. “I felt it too. But then everything got so complicated.”
“It did,” Eddie admitted. “I made it complicated. I was so scared of what it meant to have your name on my wrist. I thought I could just ignore it, live my life without acknowledging it. But you can’t run from fate.”
Y/N squeezed his hand gently. “We both made mistakes. But maybe we can learn from them, move forward together.”
Eddie stopped walking and turned to face her, his eyes filled with sincerity. “I want that, Y/N. I want to make things right. I want to be the man you deserve.”
Y/N felt a tear slip down her cheek, but this time it was a tear of hope. “Let’s take it one step at a time, Eddie. Let’s see where this goes.”
Eddie nodded, his grip on her hand firm but gentle. “One step at a time.”
They continued their walk, talking about their lives over the past decade, sharing the triumphs and struggles that had shaped them. The night air grew colder, but the warmth between them was undeniable.
As they approached her motel, Eddie hesitated, not wanting the night to end. “Can I see you again tomorrow? Maybe for lunch or dinner?”
Y/N smiled, the first genuine smile she had given him all night. “I’d like that, Eddie. Let’s meet at Benny’s burgers at noon.”
“Deal,” Eddie said, his eyes sparkling with hope.
The next day, Eddie arrived at the diner early, nervous and excited. He couldn’t stop thinking about how lucky he was to have another chance with Y/N. When she walked in, his heart skipped a beat. She looked stunning, her confidence radiating as she made her way to the table.
“Hi,” she said, sitting down across from him.
“Hi,” Eddie replied, smiling broadly.
They ordered their food and talked about everything and nothing, the conversation flowing easily. Eddie found himself laughing more than he had in years, and Y/N felt a warmth she hadn’t felt in a long time.
As they finished their meal, Eddie reached across the table and took her hand. “Y/N, I know we agreed to take things slow, but I want you to know that I’m all in. Whatever it takes, I’m here.”
Y/N squeezed his hand. “I believe you, Eddie. Let’s just enjoy the moment and see where it takes us.”
They spent the rest of the afternoon together, walking through the town and visiting old haunts, reminiscing about their shared past and making new memories.
They ended the night at The Hideout which Eddie now owned. Corroded Coffin still played there.
They had a few drinks and ran into Steve Harrington and his wife Courtney.
Steve and Courtney greeted Eddie and Y/N with warm smiles, exchanging pleasantries and catching up on each other’s lives. It felt surreal for Y/N to be back in Hawkins, surrounded by familiar faces from her past.
As the night went on, they found themselves reminiscing about their high school days, sharing stories and laughing at old inside jokes. It was strange how quickly time seemed to melt away, as if they were transported back to a simpler time, before life had thrown them all its curveballs.
At one point, Eddie excused himself to grab another round of drinks, leaving Y/N alone with Steve and Courtney. Courtney leaned in, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.
“So, are you and Eddie…?” she trailed off, leaving the question hanging in the air.
Y/N smiled, a blush creeping up her cheeks. “We’re taking things slow, but yeah, I think there’s something there.”
Courtney’s smile widened. “That’s great to hear! Eddie’s a good guy, despite his past mistakes.”
Steve nodded in agreement. “He’s really turned things around. I think you two could be really good for each other.”
Y/N felt a warmth spread through her chest at their words. Maybe, just maybe, coming back to Hawkins hadn’t been such a bad idea after all.
As the night wound down, Eddie walked Y/N back to her motel, their hands intertwined as they strolled through the quiet streets of Hawkins. There was a sense of peace between them, a newfound understanding and connection that felt stronger than ever before.
Standing outside her door, Eddie hesitated, unsure of what to say. Y/N reached up and brushed a stray lock of hair from his face, her touch sending shivers down his spine.
“Thank you for tonight,” she said softly, her eyes shining with emotion. “I haven’t felt this happy in a long time.”
Eddie kissed Y/N’s cheek causing her to blush. “Do you want to come in?” Eddie followed Y/N into the motel room, the door clicking shut softly behind them. The atmosphere between them was charged with anticipation, the unspoken words and shared history creating a palpable tension.
Y/N took a deep breath, her nerves mingling with excitement. She turned to face Eddie, her eyes searching his: “Eddie,” she began, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m scared.”
Eddie stepped closer, his hands gently cupping her face. “I am too, Y/N. But we don’t have to rush anything. We can take our time.”
Y/N nodded, feeling a sense of reassurance wash over her. She leaned into his touch, her lips finding his in a tentative kiss. Eddie responded softly at first, but the kiss quickly deepened, their years of longing and unresolved emotions surfacing in a passionate embrace.
Eddie’s hands slid down her back, pulling her closer as their tongues danced together. Y/N’s fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him even closer as they lost themselves in the kiss. The world outside faded away, leaving only the two of them in their own bubble of intimacy
They broke apart, breathless, their foreheads resting against each other’s. Eddie’s eyes were dark with desire as he looked at her. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, his voice husky.
Y/N nodded, her resolve firm. “I’ve never been more sure.”
Eddie kissed her again, more urgently this time, his hands roaming over her body. He pulled off her coat revealing her tight black dress underneath. His fingers traced the delicate fabric, sending shivers down her spine.
Y/N shrugged off her coat, letting it fall to the floor as she reached for Eddie’s shirt. She pulled it over his head, revealing the tattoos and toned muscles underneath. She ran her hands over his chest, reveling in the feel of his warm skin.
Eddie’s hands slid under the hem of her dress, lifting it slowly. Y/N raised her arms, allowing him to pull it over her head and toss it aside. She stood before him in just her panties feeling vulnerable yet empowered by the hunger in his gaze.
“God, you’re beautiful,’ Eddie whispered, his voice filled with awe.
Y/N blushed, her confidence growing with his words. She reached for his belt, unbuckling it with trembling hands. Eddie helped her, their fingers brushing in a way that sent sparks flying between them.
They undressed each other with a sense of urgency, their movements becoming more frantic as their desire grew. Soon, they were both naked, their bodies pressed together in a heated embrace.
Eddie guided Y/N to the bed, laying her down gently. He climbed on top of her, his weight a comforting presence as he kissed her deeply. His hands roamed over her body, exploring every curve and contour with reverence.
Y/N’s fingers traced the muscles of his back, her nails digging in lightly as he moved against her. The friction of their bodies sent waves of pleasure coursing through her, building an insistent need.
“Please, Eddie,” she whispered, her voice filled with longing.
Eddie looked into her eyes, his own filled with a mixture of desire and tenderness. “I want to make this perfect for you, Y/N. Just tell me what you need.”
Y/N’s heart swelled at his words. “Just need you.”
Eddie kissed her deeply, positioning himself at her entrance. He moved slowly, entering her with a gentle thrust. They both moaned at the sensation, the connection between them electrifying.
They moved together in a rhythm as old as time, their bodies perfectly in sync. Eddie’s thrusts were slow and deep, each one sending waves of pleasure through Y/N’s body. She clung to him, her nails digging into his back as she lost herself in the sensation.
“Eddie,” she gasped, her climax building rapidly. “I’m close.”
“Me too,’ Eddie replied, his voice strained with the effort of holding back.
They moved faster, their movements becoming more urgent as they chased their release. With a final thrust, they came together, their cries of pleasure mingling in the air.
Eddie collapsed on top of her, his breath ragged as he tried to catch his breath. He rolled to the side, pulling her into his arms as they lay together, their bodies still entwined.
“I love you, Y/N,” Eddie whispered, his voice filled with emotion.
“I love you too, Eddie, Y/N replied, her heart overflowing with happiness.
They spent the next few days together, but eventually Y/N had to head back to San Francisco as she had several important court dates coming up.
Her and Eddie did long distance speaking on the phone whenever they could. Eventually Y/N convinced Eddie to come and visit her in San Francisco.
Y/N was counting down the days until Eddie would arrive. When the day finally came she picked him up at the airport, and took him back to her condo.
It was a spacious three bedroom two bathroom condo in downtown San Francisco.
As Y/N showed Eddie around San Francisco he got a first-hand glimpse into what her life was like. He liked what he saw and could see himself moving there to be with her
On one of their dates they went to Golden Gate Park. As they walked along admiring the scenery Eddie began singing Y/N a song. It just so happened that a music producer was in the park with his daughter. He liked the sound of Eddie’s voice and knew immediately that Eddie had star potential.
The man slowly approached Eddie and Y/N. “Excuse me, I’m sorry to intrude, but I couldn’t help but notice how spectacular your voices young man. Have you ever considered pursuing music?” Eddie was a bit taken aback, but he recovered quickly when Y/N squeezed his hand. “Um, yes I have. It’s actually my dream. I’m currently in a band.”
The producer seemed pleased to hear this. “I own a record label and would love to audition your band. I think we could do big things together.” The man stuck out his hand. “The names Johnny Trap, owner of Trap Records.”Eddie took the man’s hand in his, shaking it firmly. “Eddie Munson, it’s nice to meet you Mr. Trap.” The man reached into the breast pocket of his coat and pulled out a business card. “Please, call me Johnny. Here’s my business card. I’ll let you guys get back to your date.”
The man walked off leaving Eddie Starstruck.
When Y/N and Eddie returned to her condo, Eddie quickly called The Hideout to speak to Gareth, Grant, and Jeff. He explained how a producer wanted them to audition, and that they needed to be on the next plane to San Francisco.
The band members were shocked and excited by the news. They quickly made arrangements to fly to San Francisco, eager to seize this opportunity.
As the day of the audition approached, nerves ran high among the band members. They spent hours rehearsing, fine-tuning their songs, and preparing for the big moment.
Finally, the day arrived. They arrived at the recording studio, adrenaline coursing through their veins. Johnny Trap greeted them warmly, leading them into the studio where they would perform.
The audition went better than they could have ever imagined. Their music resonated with Johnny, who was impressed by their talent and passion. After they finished performing, he offered them a record deal on the spot.
Eddie couldn’t believe it. It was like a dream come true. He looked over at Y/N, his heart overflowing with gratitude for her unwavering support.
Y/N smiled back at him, her eyes shining with pride. “I knew you could do it, Eddie. I’ve always believed in you.”
Before Eddie could truly commit he had to travel back to Hawkins. He sold The Hideout to Steve Harrington, and bid goodbye to his Uncle Wayne.
With the record deal secured, Corroded Coffin began their journey into the music industry. They spent countless hours in the studio, recording their debut album, and preparing for their first tour.
Throughout it all, Y/N stood by Eddie’s side, cheering him on every step of the way. Their relationship blossomed, strengthened by their shared dreams and passions.
As they toured the country, playing sold-out shows and gaining a loyal fanbase, Eddie and Y/N’s love only grew stronger. They were living their dreams together, and nothing could stand in their way.
The road ahead was filled with excitement and challenges, but with Y/N by his side, Eddie felt unstoppable. Together, they navigated the ups and downs of the music industry, leaning on each other for support and encouragement.
As their band gained popularity, they found themselves rubbing shoulders with some of the biggest names in music. They performed at music festivals, appeared on talk shows, and even won awards for their music.
Through it all, Eddie and Y/N remained grounded, never forgetting where they came from and the journey that brought them together. They cherished every moment they spent together, knowing that they were living their dreams side by side.
Eddie often found himself wondering how he ever thought he could just forget about Y/N. She was truly one of the most loving, caring, and remarkable women he’d ever met.
When Eddie heard about a benefit concert that Steve Harrington was holding at The Hideout he signed Corroded Coffin up immediately.
For the first time since finding fame Eddie stepped back into Hawkins. The town that never believed in him. The town that told him he was nothing but trouble. The town that told him he would end up like his father. The town that he had now proved wrong.
Eddie couldn’t remember the last time he felt this nervous. He played shows for hundreds of thousands of people. But those people were strangers, these people were the same people that tormented him.
Nervously Eddie paced around backstage. “Hey, you’ve got this baby. You proved these people wrong. Go out there and show them what Eddie Munson is made of.” Y/N squeezed Eddie’s hand reassuringly.
Eddie, Gareth, Grant, and Jeff stepped out onto the stage of The Hideout for the first time in 2 years. Eddie walked to the front of the stage and adjusted the microphone to the right height, and picked up his guitar. Gareth sat down at his drum set and picked up his drumsticks. Jeff picked up his base, and Grant walked up to his keyboard.
As the familiar chords of their first song filled the air, Eddie couldn’t help but feel a sense of nostalgia wash over him. The crowd’s energy was palpable, their cheers and applause echoing throughout the venue.
As they played, Eddie poured his heart and soul into every note, every lyric. It was as if all the pain and hardship he had endured over the years was being channeled into their music, turning it into something powerful and raw.
The crowd responded enthusiastically, singing along to every song and cheering for more. Eddie glanced over at Y/N, who was watching him with pride and love shining in her eyes. In that moment, he knew that he was exactly where he was meant to be.
As they reached the end of their set, Eddie couldn’t help but feel a sense of accomplishment wash over him. They had come so far since their days in Hawkins, and he knew that this was only the beginning.
As they took their final bow and the crowd erupted into applause, Eddie couldn’t help but feel grateful for everything that had brought him to this moment. And as he looked out at the sea of faces before him, he knew that no matter where life took him, he would always carry Hawkins in his heart.
Eddie walked off the stage, grabbed Y/N’s hand, and pulled her into the back alley behind The Hideout. Eddie paced back and forth nervously. Y/N wasn’t sure what was going on, he looked even more nervous now than he had backstage.
“Is everything okay?” Eddie stopped pacing and looked at her. She looked so beautiful standing there. “Y/N, there aren’t many things I’m sure of. I’m sure that I want to play music for as long as I can. I’m sure that my Uncle Wayne will never stop working. But most importantly, I’m sure that I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Y/N stared at Eddie as he pulled out a small velvet box and got down on one knee. The ring was a silver band with a large black diamond in the middle, surrounded by smaller red diamonds.
“Y/N, will you do me the honor of marrying me?”
Y/N’s heart felt like it was about to burst with emotion. Tears welled up in her eyes as she looked down at Eddie, the man who had captured her heart all those years ago in Hawkins. She felt a rush of love and happiness wash over her as she realized that this was the moment she had been waiting for.
“Yes, Eddie,” she said, her voice trembling with emotion. “Yes, a thousand times yes!”
Eddie’s face lit up with joy as he slipped the ring onto her finger, sealing their love and commitment to each other. They embraced tightly, tears of joy streaming down their faces as they shared a kiss that felt like the beginning of forever.
As they stood there in the back alley behind The Hideout, surrounded by the sounds of celebration and music, Eddie and Y/N knew that their love was stronger than anything life could throw their way. And as they looked into each other’s eyes, they knew that their future together was going to be nothing short of extraordinary.
#stranger things#eddie Munson#FemaleReader#second chance#smut#fluff#reader insert#hawkins#hawkins indiana
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An introduction is in order 🫀
My name is Liza. I am a fellow resident tortured poet and an avid reader. I read a lot, love getting lost in a good book, whether it be poetry, fantasy, a classic, romance or a memoir. In fact majority of my time is spent with my nose stuck in a book or in a good television show or movie.
Every 16th July, on my birthday, my melancholy and feelings of abandonment heavily overwhelm me. Not sure whether that has to do with me being the eldest daughter and having to be the third parent for all my three siblings or it’s me finally being “taken care of” that sends me down an unhealthy spiral.
I never wanted to be too mature for my age. I have never chosen that, I was forced into a mold that was made for me even before I was born. When you have siblings it’s as if you are unimportant and now you become the secondary caregiver. They expect you to be responsible, yet not too bossy. They expect you to act a certain way and make no mistakes, if you do tend to make a mistake by accident, they tend to name call you as selfish, ungrateful and overlook all the good that you have ever done.
It is exhausting carrying the weight of the whole family in your shoulders and still fill like a chronic loser. Whenever they loose the keys you are responsible. If they throw away a receipt they needed you are responsible. There is no winning. Everyday you fight your demons and no one notices the struggle. (Cue “this is me trying” by Taylor Swift or “Block me out” by Gracie Abrams) You never had a childhood because, you were being physically abused during the periods of your life that were supposed to shape you and be the most “fun” and “carefree”. You were so hurt that till this day you are scared of your own father. You were mentally abused by your friends as well. Hence, you deserted to their level and acted out horribly, treating them the way you were treated and pretending to like the things they did to fit in. Even if being their friend meant being the punching bag of the group, you would laugh when you wanted to cry. You felt and still feel misunderstood, when you try defending your honor it only ends up backfiring. Sometimes you wish you could wash your mouth with soap or just shut up.
A constant urge to scream fills your lungs daily.
“You can win a battle, but you’ll never win the war” - Olivia Rodrigo, pretty isn’t pretty,
Your whole childhood you have cried yourself to sleep, while having daily meltdowns in the locked bathroom. Due to your feelings being invalidated constantly. As if they know how I feel. English wasn’t your first language and so it felt lonely being in a school with all the children that did. No one wanted to play with you or be your friend, so a Science teacher had to sit and eat lunch with me daily, God bless her heart ♥️ . You were left to fend for yourself. At the age of 12 you realized: “if I don’t take care of myself no one will” . You were made independent because of all your scars, that you try so hard to hide. You were forced to be independent. You heard every complaint your mother or father have ever said about each other. You were always making peace, and when things went too far you were the one who distracted your sister and brothers. Comforting them when you needed to be comforted. Relying on no one but yourself.
By the age of 13 you were being bullied by two grown adult male teachers, called fat since you defended the girl you liked, you wanted to be her friend so hard - that you’d do everything for her. Even though you were the average size of every other girl in your class and therefore normal healthy bodied. Due to that situation, your impressionable self developed an eating disorder, you either overeat and stuff yourself full or fast throughout the day. Lying to your Mom that you’re pretty full from having lunch.
It’s as if the thoughtful daughter “aesthetic” was made for you. You are a cynic, a lot of times you hate yourself for that, yet you are an empath, you cry for every little inconvenience someone had to go through. Perhaps you have developed a negative connotation towards crying since your father hit you or threatened to hit you even harder when you cried. You developed a link between being cold and emotionless as being strong. You despised your emotions trying to be rational, cold, cunning and calculating at times.
You tried to neglect yourself thinking it’s better, yet when you tried taking care of yourself they labeled you as “narcissistic”. When all you have done is got yourself books on the money you made yourself. It feels as though you’re going mad every second of the day. You listen to Taylor Swift because she calms your anxiety, as if she’s holding your hand when you cry. You listen to Lana Del Rey and daydream of being a different kind of person, living in the 80s somewhere far away from everyone. Or you may listen to Olivia Rodrigo to let yourself let out that teenage angst and anger in a safe space without seeming desperate or insane. You felt a certain shame writing your visceral emotions into a diary so you had to staple the pages, rip them out or throw away the whole diary. Now that you are coming closer to becoming 18 you sit in your room and listen to “I Hate It Here” by Taylor Swift imagining a bigger world, that only your dreams provide, to which you are destined to belong.
Whatever it is you are alone at the end of the day, and truth be told have no friends to talk to.
#thoughtfuldaughter#depression#music#post#blog#summertimesadness#teenage angst#angst#anger#eldest daughter#sadness#diary#poetry
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Day 20 - Tease
Sakura & Suo (Windbreaker)
a/n: wrote this at the beginning of october because i read tbe whole manga and loved it. my first (and hopefully not last) windbreaker fic featuring two of my fav losers from the show. anyways, this was my own prompt so.. i hope yall enjoy it anyway <3
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“gahaha, stohohop ihihit!” the girl on the screen laughed when her boyfriend began tickling her. her hair whipped all over the place as she squirmed around, but her boyfriend was unrelenting in his attack.
even so, the scene seemed so real and so full of love.
it’s just acting. it’s just acting.
“whats this? does tickling also make you blush?”
“HAH?!” sakura whipped his head around, ready to fix suo a glare, but the other paid him no mind.
“i suppose it is a form of affection..” suo continued.
“shut up..”
“don’t worry, i think its cute!” suo ‘reassured’, though it only worsened sakura’s fluster.
“c-cute?!” sakura cried, shocked at the words suo was saying. “i’m not cute at all, do you hear me?”
“speaking of which, are you ticklish?” suo asked, but it sounded more like he was just thinking out loud than actually asking sakura, as he put a finger to his chin.
“i..” don’t know, sakura stopped himself. he had always been alone and that meant there were experiences he never felt before, and it felt a bit pathetic to admit it, even if he knew suo would never judge him for something like that. he pressed his lips into a thin line.
suo turned, looking at the other, with a more neutral expression on his face before a second later, his lips curled up into something more sinister.
“well, let’s say we find out.”
“W-WHAT?! no way you’re doing that!” sakura glared, backing away from suo to the edge of the sofa. he had accidentally caused the remote to fall to the floor, shutting the tv off in the process, but neither of them noticed.
“why not? i’m curious. where are you ticklish?” suo asked, crawling closer over to sakura. sakura froze when he saw that there was no room for him to go. he realized that he could just kick suo off if he really didn’t want this but…
he had never experienced tickling before. he knew what it was, as a concept, but have never actually felt it, and sue him for being a bit curious about what it felt like. and so, when his leg was at the perfect angle to push suo away, he curled in instead.
“oh, are you actually letting me?” suo asked, seeming a bit surprised that sakura hadn’t tried to fight him off.
“s-shut up! i’m just sore so i don’t feel like fighting right now!” bullshit, sakura lives and breathes fighting. “just get it over with!”
“okay~” suo said, repositioning himself so he was sitting next to sakura, who was leaning against the armrest of the sofa.
tentatively, suo began squeezing at sakura’s sides, and sakura immediately bit his lip, feeling laughter already threatening to slip out. it was tingly, itchy, gentle, and it was ticklish.
“oh, you don’t need to resist. i can already see you want to laugh, so why don’t you?”
“i— agh!” sakura giggled when suo touched a particularly sensitive spot on his abdomen.
“you’re blushing so much,” suo commented, and sakura felt his face heat up even more.
“s-suo..!” sakura said, slowly, still trying to resist laughing.
“hm.. here maybe?” suo poked a finger at sakura’s ribs.
“eeh!” sakura gasped at the ticklish jolt he felt. he bit his lip, trying to conceal another sound threatening to pull from his lips, but the second suo did it again… and kept doing it again… “AHAHA, nohoho, s-suo!”
“ah~ there we go!” suo smiled, looking proud.
“gahahaha!” sakura giggled as the ticklish sensation continued.
“who would’ve thought that you would be to ticklish?” suo teased, and sakura looked down, trying to avert his eyes and instead focused on getting suo’s hands away from him.
“plehehehease..!”
“and begging? i’m seeing a new side of you today.” upon hearing those, sakura closed his mouth, but they opened again in laughter almost immediately, finding himself unable to conceal his laughter anymore.
“s-suo! stahahaap!” sakura cried, starting to feel a bit delirious. suo seemed to take him seriously, as he stopped after a few more seconds, and sakura lied there, too exhausted to do anything.
“well, that was fun,” suo replied, a minute later. sakura glared at him, face hotter than the sun, but didn’t say anything. never in his life would he ever admit that he enjoyed his first ever tickle fight.. or as suo would likely say, “tickle attack”.
#tickling#tickle fic#jai’s fic#windbreaker#lee!sakura#ticklish!sakura#ler!suo#augtickletober2024#tickletober 2024#tickletober
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