#and then after that i have to set up all the cheats stuff like sentiments and milestones
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thesilmarillionblog · 2 months ago
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𝐁𝐄𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒
Summary: You play Soldier Boy's wife in the new movie. He's a method actor, and so are you. 
Pairing: Soldier Boy / F! Reader
Warnings: +18! (Minors DNI), SMUT, Soldier Boy is cheating CC, rough sex, oral sex (m! receiving), kinda role playing, kinky, unprotected sex, dirty talk, porn without plot lol, set in late 1970's
Word Count: 3283
A/N: English is not my first language.
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"Cut!"
Soldier Boy winked at you, pulled his lips back, and loosened his firm arms over your back as the director ordered. His hand continued to touch you daringly during the romantic scenes, so it must have been fun for him to witness your heart race. After licking your lips, you faced the director, who had been discussing the specifics with the rest of his staff.
With an anxious expression on his face, the director wanted to tell Soldier Boy something, but he was too scared to say anything since Soldier Boy wasn't the most sensible person when it came to providing guidance. Whatever was said to him didn't matter. Never.
The director then collected all of his stuff and gestured for you to join him. After taking the iced coffee, Soldier Boy turned to face the anxiously breathing and sweating director in front of him. 
“Now what?” Sitting in the chair, Soldier Boy stretched out his muscles and asked in a harsh voice.
Soldier Boy became irate every time he was given instructions to act with greater enthusiasm and better, suggesting that the director, Mr. Nathan, must be dying of dread and worry. 
“It's a romantic film,” Mr. Nathan remarked, appearing to become agitated as he brought up his hands on his hips. “And the subject at hand is war. It's meant to be intimate and heartfelt.”
“And?”
“You shouldn't behave as though you're going to have sex like you're in an adult film. I hope you don't take offense, sir. You're an excellent actor. However, would you mind being a bit more romantic? It would be quite beneficial.”
Snorting, Soldier Boy said, “Fuck that. A sentimental war film, huh? Jesus... I have no doubt that young soldiers would find greater use for pornographic films if we produced some. Believe me, If I fuck her and then leave her to join war, that would make women and men all cry their eyes out. Are we really making this trash movie for housewives only? Who approved this fucking script anyway?”
“Sure and no, sir—no, definitely not. I'm among those who approved, of course, and I can tell you that the script is excellent. Act a little more genuine. This is a movie that everyone should see. If you'd prefer, we could change the actress. If it would help you to be partners with Crimson Countess, maybe we can arrange that.”
The director looked at you, and you crossed your arms over your chest. Stupid coward. That would be the beginning of your best work, but his terrified ass was prepared to destroy your career before it had ever begun. 
“Oh fuck no!” Soldier Boy gulped down his cold coffee. “Not her dry pussy coming over here. My co-star is talented and fine enough.”
You were going to defend yourself in front of the director, but luckily Soldier Boy was kind enough to stand up for you, which made things much better. You were giving him every indication that, in the end, you would do anything to get this job. You would never have taken part in a greater movie before, and Soldier Boy would be the ideal match for it. That was the top of your career already. He was attractive and interesting, but it was difficult to resist and melt into him at the moments when he was meant to give you a gentle kiss. Clearly, that wasn't his thing—being gentle and loving.
It wasn't your thing either.
Mr. Nathan sighed and answered, “Sure,” becoming tired of Soldier Boy not caring at all about what he was trying to say. “We're all going to have some break, and then we can go on filming, is that alright?”
“All right. Whatever,” Soldier Boy said. His specialty was not romantic war films, obviously. He sounded so corny in situations that you could be positive he detested every single love phrase he ever delivered. But none of you had the guts to tell him that out loud. 
If he wasn't concerned about his acting in the first place, that didn't matter to you. There were times when you found it amusing that he was exaggerating in order to enrage the director. It was difficult for you to not break your character in these situations. The kissing scenes, however, were exceptional. You would have let him fuck you if he had made the move right then. He was only getting you wet with his tongue. 
As soon as Mr. Nathan left, Soldier Boy stood up and stepped toward you, looking intently at you. Your entire body tingled with anticipation. Desire was already causing your legs to tremble. 
With a low tone, he said, “Follow me,” and handed his empty cup to someone. 
With joy, you followed instructions. You had already been thinking filthy stuff since the morning. Your pussy was swollen, and your underwear was already wet since he had been teasing you so much. 
He locked the door when you followed him to his trailer.
He approached your body and looked at your long skirt before saying, “So,” and licked his lips. “What are you thinking about that guy who said that? About acting and anything else?”
As his thumb lingered on your breast, stroking it to make you go wild, you put your hands over his chest, excited about what was about to happen. Your thighs tensed with yearning. 
Whispering, "He might be right," you ran a hand down his chest and felt his hardness through his trousers. 
He smiled a bit at you when he realized you were ready for a quick fuck. You continued to softly touch him there, and his cock hardened. 
With a sigh, “About?” he began to undo your dress so he could see your tits. 
“About your acting,” you muttered as his harsh hand continued to torment you. “You should act more romantically and intimately.” 
“Hmm,” was all he said. 
He palmed both of your tits after he had finished unbuttoning your dress. 
“I consider myself to be a method actor,” he said, grinning arrogantly at you. 
You smirked and said, “What a coincidence; me too,” as you unzipped his pants. You lowered his pants and waited for him to give you guidance. “But what would your girlfriend, Crimson Countess, think about that?”
“I don't see an issue if you seal your pretty mouth. I also don't want to fuck her dry cunt forever. Now, get on your knees,” he said rudely, then, putting his hand behind your head, he pushed you on your knees.
Your pulse was pounding as you followed instructions. It wasn't that you were inexperienced, but it also wasn't that you were doing it for the first time. It had only lasted a minute or two until you had completed it in the past. It hadn't pleased you. You had immediately stopped. 
You were ecstatic to see Soldier Boy's massive, pulsating cock, though. You wrapped your hands around his thick shaft, and you licked your dry lips, sensing its weight in your palm. It was exciting and tantalizing to consider sucking the strongest superhero on the planet. 
You murmured, looking at his face and lightly brushing the tip with your lips, “What do you want me to do?” It was apparent that he was beginning to take pleasure in and enjoy what he was seeing. “Sir.”
He grinned at you and tightened his grasp behind your hair when he heard the final word, letting you know how weak you are in comparison to him. After all, you were both method actors, and the game you were playing was harmless. He was definitely thrilled.
He continued, taking his big cock in his hand and pressing it against your lips. “You're a naughty one, aren't you? About to be railed and excited to suck your co-star's cock. Not because you want to get the job, but simply to be fucked.”
“Maybe,” you said, licking the tip with your tongue. It didn't taste horrible, but it was salty. “Maybe I just want to get fucked by a supe; maybe it's because I want to keep my job.”
He finally lost patience with you and shoved his cock inside your mouth when you continued to tease him. You obeyed and took his cock in your mouth. You could take the head since his shaft was far too big for you, yet it was clear that he wanted more.
“Or perhaps I agree with the director's wish for my co-star to act more intimate in his part.” You teased him and palmed his heavy balls, adding, “Would you act more romantic just like you are expected if I was there, standing while your cum inside me?” You were certain that he would come early enough.
“You shouldn't worry about it. My cum will be flowing between your legs as you wander around,” he groaned. “But you'll suck that cock nice firstly.”
He pushed his cock into your mouth again before you could respond. You started to lick it by slowly getting used to the size of it before figuring out the right rhythm.
“Take it more,” he moaned, pressing your head on his cock. You were too aroused to resist, yet it was difficult to withstand his strength.
You attempted to take more of his throbbing cock by opening your mouth wider and placing your hands on his knees for assistance, but it was too huge.
“Fucking take it,” he snapped, annoyed by your poor attempt. Taking complete control, he then reached behind your hair with his other hand and stilled your head.
He made you choke around him by forcing half of his cock into your mouth with such power that you gagged uncontrollably. But you were determined to push yourself to the very limit. Under the mercy of the most powerful supe made you feel things. You had no idea that you needed such treatment in order to suck a cock properly. You became more and more wet as he applied more pressure, made you choke, and filled your mouth with his cock. 
When you finally had enough of him, he withdrew so he could grab your mouth and start to fuck your face.
"You like that, don't you?" He moved your head to his cock because he enjoyed it. "You like being used like this? You like being controlled, huh? Yes, fuck. Take it!"
His cock, which was covered in your saliva, began to pulse in your mouth as he continued to fuck it. You clenched up, knowing what was about to happen. Your fingers gripped his legs more tightly as you tried to keep up with his power. 
He asked, “You want it in your mouth?” However, it was obvious that it wasn't a question. Both of you and him were lost in pleasure. 
Soldier Boy pulled back his cock and rubbed it on your reddening lips and waited for your response. 
“Yes, please,” you moaned. “I need you finish in my mouth.”
He groaned, “Anything for my co-star,” and pushed his shaft back into your mouth as hard as he could. It was hot inside your throat. 
You shivered in delight and disbelief as he started to flow in your throat, releasing his hot sperm. You moved a bit to relax, but he gave a loud grunt and stilled your head. 
He moaned, “Fucking swallow,” as he continued to thrust his cock farther. You were so out of breath that tears were streaming down your face. He was cursing as he filled your mouth with his thick cum.
When he makes you taste him, you close your eyes and let him release his hot semen into your mouth fully. Though you weren't sure whether you liked the taste at all due to how strong and salty it was, you really enjoyed the whole process. You felt slick there; the way he was controlling your body was beyond perfect. 
He withdrew his cock back once he had finished fucking your mouth. 
Grasping your chin firmly, he said, “Let me see it.” 
Your mouth opened. Excited, you could feel your legs quivering and hoping he wasn't done with you just yet. Even though you weren't sure whether you had enough time to go all the way, you needed to be touched so desperately. 
He said, “Good girl,” seeing that you swallowed all. “Get up now.” 
Without allowing you to react, he made you stand once more. It was absurd how he was still hard destipe spilling inside your mouth seconds ago. You wondered how frequently he would need to come in order to soften. It may have been because he was a supe. The cause didn't matter to you. Thank goodness he had the energy to continue. After all, you had your own needs. 
“I hope we are not finished yet,” you stated, indicating your intentions with another stroke of his now firm cock. 
“You want to be fucked badly, don't you?” Your long skirt was pulled up by the tough hands of Soldier Boy, who gave you a sly smile. “You enjoy getting fucked by engaged men?”
When his erect cock brushed your thighs and you felt out of breath, you taunted him, “Only the supes.”
He chuckled and had a brief look at your underwear. You were relieved he hadn't ripped them off. He removed your tits from your white bra and pushed your unbuttoned shirt down. You arched back properly when he gave your nipples a little play.
“Let's check to see whether you're wet enough to handle it all now. Tell me you're not a virgin.” He gave a warning but added, “I'm going to fuck you raw anyway.”
“I'm not,” you moaned, impatient for him to get inside. This time, you were unable to stop pleading. “Could you please fuck me already?”
The way you begged him made Soldier Boy smirk. “Since you're begging so nicely...”
He grabbed your hair into his palm, then gave his cock five or six firm strokes to make himself completely erect. He then bent your body into the trailer's wall and positioned himself behind your entrance. 
When you actually noticed how much bigger he was than your hole, you gasped. Not that you didn't get fucked, but it had really been a while. 
“Relax a little for fucks sake. Take it properly, or it's going to hurt. I won't give a fuck,” he warned, pressing himself farther inside of you.
You tensed up. He was pulling your hair a little and knowing that if he utilized his strength a little more, he could break your neck. That should have alarmed you, but instead it enhanced your excitement. Being at a supe's mercy as he fucked you was more exciting than any other sex you had ever had because you never knew if he might lose control while trying to get his pleasure. 
He made you scream with pleasure and pain as he pushed his entire cock inside of you, pushing back with one strong motion. You began to moan and tried to fix your balance, but he instantly stilled your body by pulling your hair.
He moaned in rage, “Don't fucking move,” and proceeded to fuck you senselessly. Your eyes watered with every move he made, and your insides ached a bit. Both the pleasure and the pain that you experienced were immense.
“That's how you should get fucked. Like a slut you are. You are a slut, aren't you? You wanted me to fuck you there?” He groaned while continuing to penetrate you from the back. Your hair was tugged again by his hand. He needed a response. 
“Yeah,” you moaned, placing a hand against his severe grip on your hip. “I needed you to fuck me right there.”
He was obviously pleased with your response since you could almost hear him smirking. 
“Oh, yeah. Are you not embarrassed to want to have sex with an engaged man? Allow him to use your body any way he chooses. Show him that you are better than his future wife. You like the idea of a supe cheating on his girlfriend with you?” His filthy words caused your walls to contract as he gave you a strong and quick fuck. You were embarrassingly wet. 
You teased him, “So what?” in between moans. “In the film we're in, we're husband and wife, right? We need to get into the role properly.”
“Do you think you can wear my sperm right there and yet perform your role properly? What would they say if they knew? Will you tell them you wanted me to fuck you so that you could do your role more effectively? Do you want everyone to know your cunt is full of my cum? Is that it?” 
You knew that the game you were playing was making him more thrilled, so when he bent your body harder, you let out an excited gasp. He widened your legs and placed both of his hands on each side of your hips. Without his support, you would have already fallen. 
You screamed out, “Yes, please, please,” as your walls continued to clench around his thick cock. “Husband.” 
“Oh fuck,” he groaned as he got closer. He firmly gripped your bouncing tits and gave them a firm squeeze. “I'm going to fill you so good. Going to satisfy my wife's small greedy cunt nicely. Do you really want that, baby?         Where do you want me to cum?”
Moaning, “Yeah, oh fuck, fuck. Please come inside, husband.” Your orgasm hit so hard you had to scream his name this time. You were sure some of the staff heard your screaming. Your walls clenched badly. You got his dick wet with your slick as your legs were trembling frantically. You felt like you were about to pass out from the intense fucking you were getting from him during your peak.
He moaned, “Whatever my wife wishes,” as he continued to penetrate you despite your oversensitivity. He then began to come inside of you with a loud grunt. Before he came, he held your hips so forcefully that you felt he was going to break your body till he was satisfied. 
He cautiously removed his cock after giving you a bit more pleasure and making sure he had emptied his balls within your pussy. He gave you a hard spank on the ass and complimented you on your well-done move, seeing how his sperm was flowing between your legs. 
You grinned to yourself and pulled up your underwear when you knew you were fucked well for real. You could let him fuck you again since his hot sperm in you felt so nice. 
As he was complimenting you, you could hear him stuffing his dick back into his pants. “Now that was a good fuck.”
You looked at him and fixed your shirt, skirt, and hair. “I'm glad you enjoyed,” you said, biting your lips. You could still taste him.
“I'm sure I'm not the only one who enjoyed it,” he said, immediately lighting a cigarette and giving you a sly smirk. 
You were told to expect on the set in five minutes when someone knocked on the door right then. You smiled to yourself, undisturbed by the stares from the staff, and spent the remainder of the day with Soldier Boy. You both believed that the method of acting had had the intended impact on you and him. The director was pleased with the two of you. After the break, Soldier Boy was acting better, at least. If only they knew the reason.
It's true that method acting helped you get into your roles better. Particularly behind the scenes.
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Comments and reblogs are very appreciated. Let me know what you think please. For more, here's my MASTERLIST. ♥︎
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dilscheeseaspiration · 6 months ago
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i finally finished this fuckass shell and now im trying to furnish the apartments theyre so big theres so much jesus christ help me
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the aforementioned townhouses. unless i forgot to mention them. in which case these are the townhouses ive been working on.
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awkness · 5 months ago
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Serial killer! Platonic! Yandere Older Brother & Genderneutral Teenage Reader (Part 2)
(Part 1) (Part 3)
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As reader tries to adjust to their new life without their father, a number of concerning incidents occur, including off-putting behavior from your brother, prevents that from happening. But despite everything, you make a new friend. Surely, this can only mean good things for you, right? Things must be looking up!
Content warnings: implied murder, manipulation, domestic abuse, briefly mentioned alcoholism and child abuse, and general yandere shenanigans. If I missed anything here, please let me know :3
Authors note: lmao I have no excuse for being this late I'm just slow. This was originally supposed to be the last chapter but it got too long so I had to split it up. It feels like a bit of filler but I promise we'll get to the good stuff soon it just needs some set up. Part 3 should be the last part so I'll try not to be too slow uploading (<- lying)
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There were very few things about your father you liked, but his house was one of them. It was something he had inherited from his father, who Ben would inherit as soon your father could be pronounced legally dead. It came with a master bedroom, two normal bedrooms, a bathroom, a living room, a kitchen, the basement, and an attic.
The attic was something you had always been fascinated with as a child. It was spacious, fully insulated and even had an openable window. It could have been a bedroom all on its own. As a child, you had often daydreamed of moving your stuff up there, utilizing the bigger space for blanket forts and storing all the toys your little heart could desire. In reality, it was used in the same way the basement was, except it stored much more valuable items. Holiday decorations, clothes, old valuables that had no room to be displayed, and whatever family heirlooms your late father kept were shoved up above your head, taking space that could have been used for you. You had thought you had grown out of this fantasy, content with the room you had, but with your father gone and your brother running the house, the childhood dream had crept its way back into the front of your mind, tempting you with visions of a bigger, cooler room.
So, after working up the courage, you finally asked Ben if you could move up there. It surprised you just how easily he said yes.
And now you're here, Ben helping you sort through trash and treasure alike as you both clear out the room.
You pulled an unlabeled box from the seemingly endless pile, the top covered in dust and cobwebs. You try not to think about how many spiders are in the room with you now. Cleaning them out will be a trouble for another day.
The box opens easily, cardboard weak from age, a musty smell emanating from within. You look inside, only to be left dumbfounded. Why were there women's clothes in here?
"Hey, Ben, do you know whose clothes these are?"
Ben looks up from his own box, a vaguely confused look on his face. As he makes his way towards your box, you watch it drop into a frown.
"Those are moms."
"Oh." Is all you can say.
An awkward moment passes between you two as Ben stares into the box, face strange as he becomes lost in thought. You decide to break the tension.
"Why do you think he kept them?"
He looks away from the box and towards you, his body slowly beginning to relax.
"He was always a sentimental man, I guess that's reason enough for him."
You let out a snort. "What's there to be sentimental over? She cheated on him, divorced him, and then dumped us on him. She's not exactly a woman worth pining over."
"I'm not arguing with you, but you remember how he was. Couldn't ever let anything go."
He began rummaging through it, quickly getting to the bottom before closing it back up.
"Nothing but clothes. We should probably donate this."
You give a nod as you watch him put it in the growing donation pile. That was going to be such a pain to bring down to the car.
Instead of thinking about that, though, you turn your head to the box that Ben was searching through before you called him over.
"Is this one mom's too?"
Before you get an answer, you take a peek inside, only to once again be at a loss for how something like this could be in your home.
Inside was an assortment of strange objects. A broken polaroid camera, a stained photo album, and an array of metal objects like locks, deadbolts, and... were those shackles?
Before you could make out any more objects, Ben had made his way to you and reached over to close the flaps of the box.
"I doubt it, probably just more junk he couldn't throw away."
He turned around to you and smiled, hands holding the flaps shut.
"Want to do me a favor and go start bringing the donation boxes to the car?"
"Ugh, why do I have to bring them down?"
"Because you're the one who wanted to move up here."
You glared at him as his smile turned into an amused smirk, before you finally gave a huff and picked up a box from the pile.
"Jerk."
"Brat." The smile never left his face.
With only moderate trouble, you navigated your way down the stairs and out the door, making your way to the car. Unfortunately, you had only realized you forgot the keys when you tried to open the door to pop the trunk open.
You quietly mumble curses under your breath as you set the box next to the car, ready to make the trip back inside. Instead, you go completely still as you catch a look at the people across the street.
It was a small group of high schoolers your age, maybe older, who go to your school. They were standing the the yard across the street, a few houses down, talking together to throwing glances in your direction. Your ears strain as they try to make out their incoherent babble. They couldn't have known about your situation, could they? Or at least, what the official story was. It had been over a month since that happened, it doesn't make sense that they would be talking about it now. But you were just moving boxes out of the house such a short time after it happened. That looks suspicious, doesn't it? Of course it does. Why did you have to ask to move into the attic now?
You had been standing like a deer in headlights, openly staring for what felt like minutes before one of them seemingly made eye contact with you. You avert your gaze down as you feel your cheeks grow hot and your hands grow sweaty. A chorus of laughter erupts from the group.
Without thinking, you rush up to the door, fling it open, and slam directly into Ben as he was carrying. You hear it hit the floor as you speed walk past him.
"Wha- Hey! (Y/N)! What happened?"
You didn't reply. You barely even heard his words. Panic had fully taken over and kept you moving away from Ben, away from the door, away from the outside world, and all the judgemental people it contained.
You finally make it to your room, shutting the door behind you, and seating yourself on your bed, trying to get your bearings. 
Tears begin stinging your eyes as your shaky hands try and wipe them away. You wonder if they were still laughing at you.
A soft knock comes from your door, and your body shrinks inward, unprepared for the upcoming talk.
"Kid? Can I come in?"
You don't reply. You know Ben is going to come in anyway.
He waits a beat before opening the door, his face the picture of concern. His footsteps are quiet, and his movements gentle as he sits next to you. You find your body leaning away from him.
"Want to tell me what happened?"
You shrug, turning your head away from him. Even if you did want to talk, you couldn't trust your voice right now.
"Alright, that's fine, we can figure it out together. Was it something to do with mom's clothes?"
You don't move. Maybe if you don't answer, he'll leave and let you deal with your embarrassment in peace.
"The attic?"
A pause.
"Something in the box you were carrying...? Or maybe something outside?"
You stiffen, and immediately try to make yourself relax. Maybe he didn't notice?
"Does this have something to do with the neighbors?"
Oh. Nevermind.
Despite your best efforts, your body language must have given you away again. You hear the bed creak as he gets up, the blinds rustling a moment later as he gives a huff.
"It's those kids across the street, isn't it?" His voice takes on an edge of irritation, and you feel yourself curl inwards again.
The bed shifts as he takes his seat next to you again, a comforting hand placed on your shoulder. His voice takes on the softer quality it had before.
"I can't help you if you don't help me, kid. Did they talk to you?"
You shake your head, trying to talk, but finding the words stuck in your throat.
"They-" Your voice falters and you clear your throat, barely able to speak above a whisper.
"They didn't have to. I could see them looking at me and laughing, I knew they were talking about me, just like all the neighbors do whenever they see us. It's like they know. And these-"
You sniff, snot beginning to run and throat burning as you talk. Ben squeezes your shoulder, and you continue.
"These people go to my school, Ben. They know me. When I have to go back, they'll talk and tell everyone and the whole school will know what happened. They'll treat me different, they'll ask questions, and I won't know what to tell them-"
Your quivering voice finally gives out, and you cover your face. Ragged, irregular breaths come out as you try to force back the wave of emotions you've just unleashed. Gently, Ben pulls you to his chest as he rubs your back, murmuring gentle reassurances you couldn't quite hear.
Moments pass until your breathing finally evens out, eyes dry but still red and puffy. You slowly pull back and he lets you, his face full of worry. His hand still remains on your shoulder, an ever-present weight.
"You've had this on your mind for a long time, haven't you?"
You give a feeble nod. The thought of having to return to school had been weighing on you, but you hadn't realized how bad it had been until now. The thought is almost enough to send you spiraling again.
"I don't want to go back."
Ben gives you a smile. "You don't have to."
Your mind freezes for an instant, any and all thought muddled into incohereency.
"What?"
"Why don't I sign you up for online school this year? I remember you talking about wanting to do it a couple of months back, so why not now?"
"I..."
Your brows furrow. You did tell Ben that you wanted to do online school a couple of months ago before summer started. But this wasn't a new wish. You had been dreaming of being homeschooled since you had dreamed of living in the attic. Troubles in finding friends and fitting in had always followed you throughout the years until you realized the futility of it all, and only dreamt of a home where you didn't have to leave, and Ben and you could spend your days in peace. But the reality of your father's abuse had made school a begrudgingly safe haven of yours and you had slowly given up on that dream, too. But now that it was fully within your hands, you found yourself hesitating. Why? There was no monster in your home anymore, you were safe, and there's no reason to say no.
"I don't know."
He smiled.
"It wouldn't have to be permanent, just for this year. And if you don't like it, I can reenroll you back into your old school, so your options are always open. Plus, you're right, (Y/N). I know how cruel kids can be, especially when they're confronted with situations and people they don't understand. I don't want you to face that if you don't have to."
You gnaw on your lip, unsure of what to say. Ben was right on all accounts, the things he was saying made sense, and yet you couldn't find yourself saying yes. Why couldn't you let yourself have this?
"Can I think on it?"
Ironically, it came out of your mouth before you could think at all.
He nodded, his good-humored smile still on his face. You let out a small breath, so glad to still see it there.
"Of course, kid, it's a big decision. Take your time."
He gave your shoulder one last pat before getting up.
"I'm going to move the rest of the boxes in the car and go drop them off. You want me to pick up dinner on the way back?"
"Yeah, I'm fine with whatever."
"Alright. Rest up, I'll be back soon."
Unable to say much else, you nod as he gives you one last smile before he heads out the door, closing it behind him.
You rub your eyes, your body slowly unwinding from the tension just moments prior, until it gives in and you lay down on your bed.
With nothing else left to do, you crawl under your covers, the familiar comfort of the soft and worn fabric soothing your nerves. Distantly, you hear the sound of Ben's footsteps as he makes his way back and forth from the attic, the familiar and comforting sound lulling you into a dreamless sleep.
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The next morning was pretty uneventful. Ben was off at work while you continued clearing the attic, sorting out the junk and keepsakes, only occasionally getting scared by the stray spiders that had made their home in the crevices between the boxes.
By noon, everything was sorted, with the only thing left being to take the boxes to be donated or tossed in the trash. But you needed Ben to help you with that, so you found yourself heading down to the kitchen, heating instant noodles in the microbe, wondering what you were going to do until he got home.
Around this time is when you usually went to go check the mail, but since yesterday, the thought of having to leave the house left you with an uneasy feeling, tension building in your spine and shoulders the longer you thought of it. A part of you was ashamed that you couldn't even walk out to the mailbox without it being a big deal, and another, much larger part, found immense relief in the thought of abandoning the task altogether, and not having any more chance encounters like yesterday. The more you considered it, the more you found your body sagging in relief. Yeah, Ben can grab it when he gets home, you're sure he wouldn't mind. It's no big deal.
The microwave beeps and you grab the noodles, all thought of the outside quickly leaving your head.
You had just dumped the flavor packet in when you heard a knock at the door.
Your heart, ashamed you were to admit, skipped a beat, and you froze mid-action, breath catching roughly in your throat. Who could that be? Maybe that was Ben, and he had just forgot his keys? No, that's stupid, he wouldn't be home this early, and he never forgets his keys. With no other answers coming to mind, you quietly set the packet down and got up to the door to peek through the peephole.
On the other side of the door stood one of your neighbors, a kid your age. You see him the most often out of all of your neighbors, often doing yard work and tending to the flowers in his front yard. He was also the guy you caught staring at you the most. Well, maybe staring wasn't completely accurate, but whenever you looked his way, you two would usually make eye contact before one of you shyly looked away. You didn't know why, and it played havoc on your nerves. He wore a hoodie despite the summer heat and had an envelope in his hand. He looked nervous.
You pull away and bring your hand to undo the locks before stopping.
For one glorious, tempting moment, you picture yourself turning around, going back to your noodles, and taking them upstairs and away from the door to eat in peace until Ben comes home.
Instead, you undo the locks and open the door.
Your neighbor looks slightly taken aback like he didn't expect anyone to answer. You try not to notice.
"Hello?" You ask.
"Oh, uh, hi! I'm Alex, your neighbor. I live right next to you, the house to the right, well- uh, my right, your left. The one with the red car and lawn gnomes out front?"
He gestures sheepishly towards his house, face nearing the complexion of a tomato.
"Nice to meet you, Alex. I'm (Y/N)."
The social protocols of politeness take over, unable to fully pay attention as your mind stalls, still in a state of shock from the anxiety of the situation.
"(Y/N)? That's a nice name." He smiles at you before quickly looking at the ground.
He hands the envelope over to you, speaking as you look over it.
"Uh, I just wanted to drop this off. I think our mail got mixed up."
Sure enough, the envelope had your brother's name and address on it.
"Oh, thank you." You say lamely.
For a beat, you wonder if you should say something more. It felt wrong to just leave the conversation as it was and close the door, but what else were you supposed to say? Before you can think about it, he speaks again.
"I, uh, wanted to say that I heard about what happened to your dad, and I'm sorry."
Again, your heartbeat skips, and you stiffen, body alert, eyes wide. You probably look like a deer caught in headlights in front of him if he wasn't still looking at the ground. The thought would embarrass you if it weren't for the sharp spike of adrenaline hitting your veins.
"I... I had a dad like him too."
And just like that, your body pauses its panic response, and you find yourself fully focused on him as he continues.
"I thought it would be easier after me and my mom moved away, and it has been, but those kinds of experiences don't just go away, and I wanted to say that you aren't alone."
You still felt a little wired from the previous scares, you you felt a strange sense of ease slowly pass through you at his words.
You stare at him, as he stares down, no words passing between you two before you finally speak.
"Thank you."
You only hesitate for a moment before continuing.
"It has been rough, but it's been more of a relief than anything. It's nice not having to hide away in my room until he leaves."
He looks up, a small smile gracing his face as he finally relaxes.
"Yeah, it's nice not having to check to see if he passed out in the house again."
You find your lips quirking up. "Or having to check his pulse when he is passed out."
"Not having to worry about him throwing a fit whenever he runs out of beer despite him being the one who drank it all."
"Not having to constantly hide food in your room so you have a supply when he does throw his tantrums"
Alex gave a disbelieving laugh.
"Yours let you get food out of the kitchen? There was a lock on the fridge and pantry when I lived with mine."
Your smile widened into one of disbelief, amusement, and shock. "What the hell? Why?"
"Kept getting upset that the food would go missing. Worst part is, every time he got blackout drunk, he'd binge eat, pass out and get mad at us for eating all the food."
You couldn't help it. You started giggling, and he started giggling, unable to react in any other way to the absurdity of it all.
"Sorry! I really shouldn't laugh-" You began, failing to stifle the laughter.
"Don't be!" He said. "He's a stupid guy, you should laugh at him."
You both share the moment, the laughter slowly dying down as you both take your first good look at each other. In this moment, you see something you can't help but talk about.
"Is that a minecraft necklace?"
He looks surprised, but pleasantly so. He glances down before holding it up with a grin. The pendant was the shape of a creeper head.
"Yeah, I'm a big fan!"
He puts it back down and his demeanor changes back to being sheepish, but not painfully so like he was before.
"I have minecraft for Xbox and a spare controller at my house. If you want, you can come over and play?"
It was your turn to be nervous again.
On one hand, you wanted to say 'absolutely'. You couldn't remember the last time you got invited to hang out, and the thought of something as normal as playing a video game with a friend was something you needed. Well, maybe you couldn't call him a friend yet, but you feel like you could, given enough time. Plus, after being so afraid of your neighbors and leaving your house, having someone come up to you and act so warm and friendly made you feel soft. It was hard to say no to that.
On the other hand, you had the nagging, unnameable feeling that Ben would be, upset, but you couldn't think up any concrete reason as to why. In fact, if you focused on that feeling too long, your mind went blank.
Sure, you were going about out of the house without him knowing, but Ben has always been supportive of you. Sure, he's never really discussed rules about going over to a friend's house because the situations never come up, but he's fairly easygoing. You were sure that if you explained why you went, he would be understanding. Happy, even.
Plus, you were only going next door, you had your phone on you, and you would be back before Ben came home, so it's not like he had to even know what happened. Not that you wanted to lie to him, but something about that option comforted you more than any of the other things you listed.
Discomfort pushed aside, you gave a smile back to Alex.
"Sure thing, let me grab my phone."
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It could have been the perfect hangout. Alex's mom was nice, bringing you two snacks and telling stories from Alex's childhood despite his embarrassment, as you two hung out in the living room while he helped you figure out the controls. Soon enough, you two were building a base together, laughing at each other as a creeper or sneaky skeleton would get kills on you both.
You were halfway through making the third story of the base when your phone started ringing. You felt your heart drop to your stomach when you saw Ben's picture on the screen.
"Shit."
You immediately pocketed in and got up.
"What's wrong?" He paused the game and looked up.
"I wasn't supposed to stay so late, my brother's probably home by now."
You went over to the window and peeked through the blinds, and as fate would have it, you saw his car in the driveway.
You hear Alex speak from the couch, voice slightly concerned.
"You're not going to get in trouble, are you?"
That was the question, wasn't it?
"I... don't think so. Maybe? I've never been out late before."
"If you want, I can come with you and explain what happened. I'll take the blame."
Despite your growing worry, you felt a pang of gratitude come through. You gave a small smile.
"That's okay, he'll probably be a little mad, but I don't think it's that serious."
You headed to the door, Alex following behind.
"Hey, on the chance you don't get grounded or whatever, here's my phone number."
You look back and see him scribbling on a piece of paper before he hands it over to you. You take it and look at sloppy, but thankfully still legible writing, and give a bigger, more genuine smile.
"I'll text you later. If I still have my phone, that is." You joke, or at least try to.
He gives a smile and a wave as you turn back and exit the front door.
As it closes behind you, the warmth of the interaction slowly leaches from you and leaves you feeling cold and rattled.
You didn't fully believe the things you said to Alex. You had no real idea what Ben would like because you had never gone against what he said before. The thought alone turned your stomach into knots. It was simply how you two functioned, Ben was the one in charge and made the big decisions, and you listened. Sure, he never had any explicit rules about this, but that didn't mean anything.
As you made the short walk to your home, you began strategizing.
You should do damage control right away, start apologizing straight away, and let him know where you were and what you were doing. Wait, should you mention Alex? At that thought, you shoved the paper with his number deep in your pocket. You didn't want Ben to see it.
Before you could think about it anymore, you were at your front door. Your back tensed, and you hesitated only a moment before opening the door. Waiting would only make it worse.
Before you can fully step in, you see Ben pacing the kitchen, brows furrowed, face strained. As soon as he heard you, his head whipped up, and you felt yourself freeze like a rabbit spotted by a wolf. Frozen, unable to do anything else than stare.
"(Y/N)?"
Just like that, you were broken out of your trance, finally allowed to move again.
You step in all the way and close the door behind you.
"I'm sorry! I didn't think I'd be out that long, I wasn't keeping track of time, I-"
Your voice died the moment you looked back to Ben's face, his features looked so... angry. You've never seen him look at you like that before, never seen him look like that at all. It set off a loud, blaring warning in your brain that something was wrong, and that you needed to leave. But that was crazy. This is Ben, your brother, you were fine.
You tried to start again.
"I was..."
It tapered off as you saw him move towards you, movement swift and robotic as he kept his attention on you. Without thinking, you shrunk back.
"Ben-"
Before you could finish he's in front of you, grabbing your shoulders so tightly it's borderline painful. You grip his arms, weakly trying to push away, knowing better than to seriously try.
"Where were you?"
There was such a dangerous edge to his voice that you couldn't think, couldn't look away. Your breaths came out shallow and your voice so tiny you could barely hear it.
"With the neighbors."
That only made him angrier.
"What neighbors? We don't talk to the neighbors here."
Oh, you were shaking now.
"With- with the neighbors right next to us, the Rogers. I was hanging out with Alex-"
"Who the Hell is Alex?"
His grip got tighter as he shook you, and you could feel the bruises forming. You started pushing at him again, but your arms trembled so badly you might as well not have tried.
"B-Ben, it hurts."
Your voice was so thick with emotion that it was hardly coherent, but Ben understood.
His face blanked for a moment, body shocked to stillness as you continued to try and leave. Then, without warning, he let you go, turned his back and walked a few paces away from you, pinching his nose as he let out a sharp breath.
You listen to him as he takes deep breaths while you rub your sore arms, snot beginning to run as your eyes turn wet. As you step away, you feel your back pressed against the door, and you have the fleeting idea to open it and run away. You realize what you're thinking, and the idea terrifies you so deeply you stay rooted to the spot.
Finally, Ben turns back, face still hardened but not as severely as before.
"Who's Alex?"
You sniff. You really didn't want to do this anymore.
"He's the neighbor's kid. Our mail got mixed up and he brought it over to me, and invited me over to hang out."
You probably should have stopped there, but some scared, hurt part of you needed Ben to understand that you didn't mean this, it wasn't your fault. Your voice cracked as you continued.
"I'm sorry, I'm really, really sorry. It was only supposed for a little bit, I didn't think I would be over for so long, just an hour or two. I- I didn't mean for this to happen, I should- I should of called you."
You stopped, but only because the shaking in your hands had spread to your voice, and you didn't think you could keep going without sounding like a complete mess.
His face didn't soften for a moment, staring blankly as you had gone on. After it ended, he closed his eyes, rubbed his face and gave a sharp sigh.
You couldn't read him when he looked away. Was he calming down? Did that make him more upset? Every second that ticked by frayed your already worn-out nerves. You were only one yell away from bursting into tears.
He looked up again, face the same as it was before.
"Do you know what it's like to come home with the door unlocked and see you missing, with no goddamn clue where you could be? What was I supposed to think? You didn't even pick up your damn phone!"
He stopped, took a breath, and then continued, a dangerously calm edge to his voice.
"And then you tell me you decided to stay over at a stranger's house without calling me? A person you only met today? They could of been anybody, anything could happened to you. I thought you had better sense than that."
It stung.
"I'm sorry."
It sounded small and pathetic, even to your own ears.
He let out a sigh.
"Go to your room. We'll talk about this more later."
You don't think twice. You rush away on shaky legs to your room and quietly close the door behind you, afraid of doing anything else to set him off. The bed lets out a soft creak as you sit down. You gather your quivering hands in your lap and look down on them, not sure what to do with yourself.
Before you can think about it any further, you hear the front door open and slam shut, then the car turning on and driving away.
As it quiets down, you can't help it. Stifled sobs climb their way out of your chest, feeling like they're choking you until you can't resist anymore. You collapse on your bed, openly crying until you exhaust yourself to sleep.
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The next morning felt almost surreal. You woke up to hearing Ben walking about the house as he did his morning routine. Usually, you would be out of the room right now doing the same, with you both then sitting down to eat breakfast together until it was time for him to leave. This time, you stayed in bed the entire time, idly scrolling your phone as you listened to his footsteps.
A part of you expected him to knock at your door, and ask you why you weren't out yet. Instead, you heard the sizzle of eggs hitting a hot pan as they cooked, and after a short few moments, the front door opening, closing, and locking behind him. The familiar sounds of the car's engine slowly faded away, and you finally got out of your bed, ready to start your day.
You decided to text Alex. You were hesitant to give the details of what happened, simply saying that Ben was upset and things were tense, and thankfully, Alex never pushed it. Instead, he started sending you memes and talking about his ideas for the minecraft world you both started. It was surprising how easy it was to talk to him, the conversation going for hours before he had to leave to help with dinner.
When it was time for Ben to come home, you scurried back to your room, feeling relieved but guilty when you closed the door. On one hand, you could still feel the fear you had last night, and you had no idea what to do with it. It was perplexing and off-putting, and thinking too hard on it made you feel like your brain was turning to static, so you opted to not think about it at all, which meant avoiding your brother as well.
But the guilt wouldn't let you be. It turned what should have been the comfort of your room into a place of wrongness, that you were doing something awful by keeping yourself here and not going down to see him like you usually did. Your lip began to bleed, and only then you realized you had been chewing on it since you heard Ben's car pull in.
You contemplated texting Alex for a distraction as you heard him make his way into the house. And then, step by step, make his way way to the hallway, and then to your door.
And then, the knock.
"Can I come in?"
You don't know if you want to answer, so you don't.
"I know you're awake, kid. Your lights on."
Thoughts raced through your mind as you tried to figure out what to do. For a moment, your mind latched onto the idea that you could pretend to be asleep, but you immediately shrugged it off. This was going to happen anyway, might as well happen now.
"Come in."
The door opens, and you see Ben, completely exhausted, his gaze nervously flitting towards you and the floor as he carried a fast food bag in his hand.
"I brought dinner."
You instinctively perk up at the mention of food, and he takes that as a sign to step closer and sit on the far side of the bed, bag between you two, as he clasped his hands together. His leg starts to quickly bounce before he stops it.
"Figured I'd pick up something on the way home. Didn't feel like cooking.
You nod, even though there's something in you that compels you to do or say more to try and ease his nerves. Even now, after what he did, you hate to see him upset. You try to push the urge to comfort down as you pointedly look away.
Both of you sit in silence while looking anywhere but at each other. In your peripheral, you can see him fidgeting with his hands.
"I know I scared you last night, I just-"
He nervously shifts in his seat. His voice is halting but sincere.
"It worried me, seeing you gone. You mean so much to me, (Y/N). Ever since you were born, I've been there to take care of you. I can't remember a time without you, and I don't want to. You're a part of me, without you, I... I don't even know who I am."
You look over at him and freeze. You're big brother, the man who protected you and cared for you your whole life, is bunched in on himself, face strained and twitching with barely contained emotion as he doggedly stares directly ahead, like looking at you would hurt him. His eyes are red and dark circles frame them. You swallow, years of experience screaming at you to reach over and comfort him, but instead, you sit, never once looking away as he continues talking.
"I shouldn't have done that to you, kid. I should of known better. Should of contained myself. I try so hard for you, but there's times it feels like it isn't enough, and it keeps me up at night."
He sniffs, and your eyes begin to blur.
"I never wanted to be like that in front of you, you didn't deserve to see that. I-"
He wipes his hands over his face, taking a deep breath as he tries to collect himself. After a beat, he uncovers his face and finally looks at you.
"I'm sorry."
It was like a spell had been broken. You found yourself pushing a food to the side and leaning against his shoulder. He hesitantly wrapped his arm around you, and when you didn't resist, he reached his other arm around you, pulled you into his chest, and began softly rocking you back and forth.
You feel the rise and fall of his chest, and it feels the same as you did as a kid when you would run up to him when something scared you, or when you felt your emotions overwhelm you. He would hold you tight and it felt like you were in the safest place in the world. The relief of that feeling after everything you had been through was like coming home.
Still safely tucked in his arms, you spoke again, voice more quiet and child-like than you meant it to be.
"Promise me you won't do that again."
The mere thought of him acting so uncontrollably and violently towards you was enough to make you nauseous.
He squeezed you tight.
"I promise, kid, never again."
You nodded, unable to reply. The both of you stayed like that for what felt like an eternity before he slowly began letting you go.
After getting fully untangled, you rub your eyes, a feeling of exhaustion settling in as your stomach rumbles.
"I'm hungry."
"Hi hungry, I'm Ben."
His reply is so quick, you think it's automatic for him.
You shoot him a glare, but it's undermined by your smile. He returns it with one of his own.
"You wanna go down and eat? I got you a milkshake too, it's down in the kitchen. But might be a bit melted by now."
You spring up, fast food bag in hand as you make your way towards the door.
"Why didn't you say so, let's go!"
You hear him let out a chuckle, and you let out one reflectively, too.
You both share the meal together, talking and laughing late into the evening, until it was finally time to sleep. You drifted off easily into a deep, restful sleep, finally at peace.
178 notes · View notes
umeoniii · 2 years ago
Text
aot men beige flags
eren, jean, reiner , levi , armin , connie
!: sfw
(^∇^)
eren:
☆ makes weird voices.
high pitched, low pitched, shaky he doesn’t care.
like sometimes as a bit he just uses weird accents and stuff.
he’ll speak like a caveman for one day.
“me want ooga burga” he’ll scratch his head like one too
and you’ll just stare at him like, “this mfs crazy” bcs literally wtf is he on about?!
the next day he’s trying to sound french
“oui oui mon amour”
and he’s wiggling his brows and has his imaginary mustache in between his fingers.
☆ his next one is he’s kind of oblivious to a lot of things.
you can pull out the ugliest outfit known to man to test him and he’ll say “that looks so good baby”
not bcs he’s setting u up. no, because he doesn’t think that lime green ripped jeans and a orange cropped hoodie look bad together.
you’ll have to show him what fashion looks like and he’ll get better as time goes on.
jean:
the tickle monster.
☆ when you’re around him u have to watch your back. he’s serious about it.
u can have a super cute sentimental moment with him and he’ll pull it out.
“i really love you baby.” you’d say
“who else do you love, because i know you’re cheating on me with him.”
and you’re like WHAT.
“with who?!”
he’d pause and stare at you for a few seconds.
“THE TICKLE MONSTER!”
and he’d tickle you until you can’t breathe and almost pee yourself.
and after that you don’t trust him but then proceed to slip up multiple times.
u guys are gonna hate me for this next one…
☆ he does “the face” when he’s gonna kiss u
u guys know what i’m talking about
“the face guys make when they go in for a kiss”
his isn’t horrid, only because he’s attractive
sometimes he actually over exaggerates it to piss you off.
it’s not super horrible but it’s giggle worthy
reiner:
☆ he’s a cringe bf. unironically. it’s sweet but not all the time.
by cringe i mean “i just found out about periods, god it must suck to be a beautiful goddess :/.”
or he’s like
“hey! tell you’re period it can’t hurt you like that, it’s not cool!”
☆ he’s also a scaredy-cat.
behind all that muscle is a big baby.
he jumps at scary movies even when he knows what happens next.
cannot play something like fnaf with him
he will throw the phone and scream like he got stabbed in his chest.
he’s probably still scared of the dark but it’s kind of sweet idk. he literally cuddles with you at night like a mother and her baby. you’re practically holding him like a frail little princess, except he’s kind of the exact opposite.
this is actually kind of cute though..
levi:
☆ now his beige flag is that he can be SUPER sarcastic. ik he is.
he’s super snarky and sassy.
like he’s the type to tell what’s considered a ‘corny dad joke’ but instead he’d say it with a stoic face.
like if youre talking and couldn’t remember and say something like “remember when umm…” and you just sit there and think, he’d come back with “no i don’t remember when that happened”.
he wouldn’t laugh or anything.
i feel like that’s why it’s funny. he could make a childish poop or fart joke and it would only be funny bcs he looks like this 😐
he would own a stupid t-shirt that says something like, “find your patience before i lose mine”.
☆ he’s a karen as well. he’s not super bad but like at restaurants and stuff when his foods not right or the tables are not bussed…
i’d be in the bathroom crying my mascara off if i was his waitress
armin:
☆ he’s scared of animals.
this includes typical house pets like dogs or cats.
it’s bcs “they don’t speak , so you’ll never know what they’ll do next.”
his fear stems from one small thing that happened when he was younger.
a cat jumped onto his lap.
he thought it was trying to attack him and so he screamed and the cat got scared.
that’s it.
he can’t even visit the zoo because he’s scared the animals will break out. (he’s super serious about it, it’s not even something he jokes about)
he’s tried to like animals and it worked for a while.
until the dog started to play a little too much to his liking.
☆ also he just randomly informs you of random facts.
completely random.
you could be on the toilet and he’ll come in the bathroom like, “a shrimps heart is in its head…”
no “did you know?” or “isn’t it cool that?” he just says it.
if you ever go onto a game show you’ll probably win it with all the useless knowledge he’s given u.
connie:
☆ you could tell him the most god awful thing happened to you and he’ll be like
“wait, this reminds me of something that happened in something i just watched.”
he’ll proceed to whip out his phone and show you the tv show, news report, tiktok. whatever it was he saw.
this tends to happen to every experience that you have.
you could be held hostage and they’ll call him for ransom and somehow it reminds him of this one part of a tv show.
sometimes it’s funny sometimes it’s not.
☆ he sleeps like he hasn’t slept since the day he was born.
he hops into the bed and sits there for 1 minute before he starts snoring aggressively.
he looks dead, like actually…
sprawled out and snoring with his mouth open.
one time he slept with his eyes wide open and you shook him awake panicking.
he belittled you and was all smart and cocky saying “i would never sleep with my eyes wide open” even though he did.
he sleeps to the rain sounds with the thunder. but sometimes is so sleepy and forgets about it.
tagz!🐬: @hangesgirlypop , @yiugen , @heartshapedtearss
a/n: heyooo! b4 u guys request it, im doing girls next ;). i just think this trend is the cutest thing ever, plus it feels good to write fluff. also im actually getting back to requests. like frl this time, i’ve been grinding non stop all night so i could be done by hopefully friday. feel free to request cute things u guys, i will absolutely write it! and also feel free to request other characters, i feel like u guys don’t request them bcs u guys don’t see them and so u think i won’t do them. trust i probs will!
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the-s1lly-corner · 2 years ago
Note
jealous/clingy spot/johnathon headcannons?
Jealous and Clingy hcs for Jonathan/Spot!
Knocking this out before I take a nap (eepy <\3)! Usually I would split this into 2 sections buuuuut since I think there wasnt much change in this department I'm not gonna bother!!
So!! Yeah!!
Fair warning that this will probably be OOC and/or have mistakes since I'm eepy but I'm too stubborn to leave this for later ☝️😔
This ones gonna be on the shorter side, maybe
Idk I write these opening/author notes before + as I'm writing
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Starting off Jonathan is.
Whoooboy!
Like he tries not to be toxic about it, he doesn't want to hurt you or drive you away, and that sentiment is still there even after he becomes spot
He doesn't have many friends and he'll never forgive himself if he makes you leave
What he needs is loads of reassurance that you only have eyes for him, and communication is key! Let him know when you're going to be late or going to hang out with someone for a bit; if he sees you with someone else, or another *guy* it'll eat him up all day
Though sometimes he can still jump to conclusions so arguments are inevitable every now and then but again, communication and patience is key; he'll never go as far as to accuse you of cheating though (unless he truly has reason to suspect)
He doesn't think hes the prettiest, or nicest, or smartest, or-
I mean of all people, you chose him?
He feels lucky to have you, but he believes you can do so much better than him and that thought is constantly plaguing his mind
Not very self assured tbh
After the collider incident his self image issues get way way WAY worse; from the fact he can hardly consider himself human, to his new powers, to the fact everyone from his old life dropped him
Except, for you
You stayed
Through it all the fact you stuck around does give him comfort, more so than if you were to meet him after the collider incident
Like
Its one thing to meet him as spot
But I feel its another to see and know how he was before, as just Jonathan, and to still stick around after his life was flipped upside down
His jealousy still spikes up every now and then
As a side thing I feel like as Jonathan he liked having you in his sight and, if possible, he liked holding your hand. Think of it as a "you're still here, you're here for me, you're not going anywhere and you love me," sort of thing
As spot that turns into him wanting to be even closer to you anytime he has the chance
The whole "oh I'm not the most (x)" thing REALLY amps up when he becomes spot, especially in the beauty department
Remind him that you dont mind the holes, shower him in affection
Overall it's going to be a while until hes confident in himself, both as Jonathan and as Spot
So please be patient with him, but remember to set clear boundaries for the relationship! I feel like with a lot of hc lists for insecurity and jealousy stuff, boundaries are hardly touched up on!! No hate to those writing like that and not including it but I feel like its important to stress that the other partner has the right to enforce their own things
Though that might be because when I was younger, jealous hcs were more... yandere-esque or getting REAL close to it, and it kinda. Made me think that was normal and desirable and okay in relationships so
Idk maybe that's just that part of me wanting to prevent that from happening to someone else
With that aside, ultimately Jonathan/Spot will try his best to not get too intense or pushy or controlling; again, he loves you, and he doesn't want to love you
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l3viat8an · 2 years ago
Note
Can you do one where reader just spoils asmo. Like taking them on dates buying clothes for them. Basically fluff I think it would be really cute if asmo got really sentimental because he's being treated as a person instead of the avatar of lust
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Fluff!!! Getting your nails done and some shopping with Asmo!-
Ofc, ofc! There’s more then one way to spoil a demon~! and I’m mixing theses two asks a bit because yea- lots of shopping with Asmo & some teasing! Ignore any typos I’m dyslexic as fuck- sorry
First things, first going to get your nails done at one of Asmo’s favorite little nail salons!
They always treated you and Asmo like royalty (which you basically are in hell lol), getting matching sets of baby pink french tips for Asmo’s birthday!
The demon himself insisted on picking the style and color, something simple and cute!
Laughing and making small talk the whole time with the salon tech as she works and she even joins in on a few of Asmo’s party stories, telling you a few embarrassing tidbits about the demon as he blushes and tries to shush her “Don’t tell MC that!” “But you looked so cute with your head in a punch bowl! You blew up on devilgram if I remember right.” She stops to think for a moment, “Oh! That’s right! Top meme of 1820!! I still see a few of the old ones my nieces and nephews send me.” Asmo groans and would hide his face in his hands if she wasn’t in the middle of painting his nails. You raise one eyebrow and look over at him, “Top meme?” “Don’t!! I’ll show you pictures from that night where I actually look good but forget about that one!” “Alright, alright.” You’ll just have to ask Satan or Mammon about it later-
You and the nail tech giggle at Asmo’s protest and start talking about other stuff, a few of the models currently trending on devilgram, Asmo’s upcoming party and so on. Stuff the demon was more than happy to chat about, mixed with some gossip.
When your nails are done and you move to pay she stops you. “I can’t change you on his birthday. Besides, it’s been ages since I’ve seen him laugh so….” She trails off for a moment looking for the right word “Well, genuinely. You always bring out a special side of Asmodeus. I wish others could see more often.” it’s your turn to protest and you tell her you didn’t do anything special and he’d have a cow if he thought you’d gotten a discount/cheated her out of money and she laughs, “Don’t worry I’ll still give you the recipe. I just won’t take your money.” you try to convince her one more time, but as you start too, you feel arms wrap around your middle and a quick kiss on the cheek “Almost ready sweetie~?” Asmo had caught up and was ready to go-
The tech smiled again, and gave you one last wink. Handing you a fake receipt and telling you to have a good day and continue treating Asmo~!
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Next up taking him clothes shopping! Not that either of you needed new clothes but it’s his birthday and you want to spoil him! “Oh!!” Asmo squealed walking down the racks and racks of clothes and picking out outfit, after outfit. Some for him to try on and some for you~!
After picking out ten or twivlve outfit Asmo dragged you back to the fitting rooms and pushed you into the biggest one, following right behind “Oooh~ cozy.” Asmo giggles turning away and starting to strip and try on his first outfit, “Come on sweetie! No need to be shy it’s just you and me~” he teases seeing you haven’t moved from your corner yet. “That’s exactly what I’m worried about, Asmo.” Your own voice is light and teasing but, he looks at you dead serious for a moment, “I’m not going to try anything. I’m honestly having fun just hanging out with you~” and he turns back to his mirror and start, putting on his first outfit. You just stare at his back for a minute, before shaking your head as if to clear it and starting to try on your own outfit.
You try on all the outfits, a few are only Asmo’s style, sure you look cute but he’s the one who looks gorgeous. and a few are more your style! For every outfit he picked Asmo found a complimentary / matching one for you or him. Snapping a few selfies in the outfits he loved and giving a “Meh” face at the ones he didn’t. It was fun, Asmo had little compliments for all your outfits and everytime you tried to compliment him he’d giggle and give you a little kiss on the kiss or nose. Just small little drops of affection before trying on the next outfit. Eventually you had 3 outfits each and made you way out of the try on room and towards the counter to pay passing several more displays, you stop for a moment and grab two hats. They’re fairly plan looking baseball caps, but both have “Bad bitch” embroidered in pink across the front and the idea of getting Asmo to wear one makes you laugh.
Reaching the checkout counter a few steps behind him, you can’t exactly hide the hats from Asmo, and he raises one eyebrow in question, “Needed a hat?” you shake your head “No, but I wanted something to wear right away and I wanted to match with you.”
Asmo blushes but laughs, asking the cashier to leave the hats out of your bags and even puts yours on for you, then quickly putting on his own. “There! Now everyone will know we match.” and breaking into a fit of giggles.
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After paying for your new outfits and putying on your new hats it’s off to your next stop! But this time Asmo’s leading, half dragging you through the Devildom side streets until you get to some small shop that looks much smaller compared to the others. The little shop sign is crooked and a little faded.
You can’t imagine this being somewhere Asmo would shop. It’s so different then, the big stores like Majolish. “Ahh, Asmo? Is this the right place?” You ask as he reaches for the doorknob “Yes! We’re here just for you~” and he leads you inside.
It’s a quiet little shop with only one salesperson at a little corner absolutely full of cosmetics and empty makeup pallets. “Amaymon! We’re here for MC’s appointment!” Asmo chirps happily, still holding your hand and helping you into a seat at the counter, Amaymon gives you a small smile, looking over your face carefully. Almost as if he’s inspecting you, “Hello, MC. Asmodeus, told me you’ve been interested in makeup.” You nod, it’s true. You had asked Asmo if he could give you some pointers. But you didn’t expect to go to a different demon- “Good. Now don’t worry, I’m not going to give you classes or anything. No, I’ll leave all that to Asmodeus. I’m simply going to match your skin tone and create a makeup pallet with you and a few things Asmodeus told me about you.” “Oh. Is that all?” You ask, still a little confused. but Asmo’s still beaming next to you, so you feel safe. “That is all.” Amaymon says, before going completely quiet.
He grabs a few things here and there moving much faster then, you expected. He grabs small bottles of what look like concealer and foundation, although you don’t ask. Mixing them, occasionally looking over at you before going back to his work.
Asmo watches for awhile before looking around the little shop, he grabs a few new lipsticks off of a different counter and even calls you over to help him pick out some eyeshadow, “We can try all of that’s together when we get home! Now what we really need is a few dark reds or maybe a blueberry-ish shade…” Asmo looks at your face and grabs a few more things, explaining how the colors might look a little bright but he can tone them down or how they’ll bring out your eyes. He just seems so happy, getting to spend time with you and it makes you smile!-
A small cough interrupts your thoughts as, Amaymon has apparently finished. A rather large box is now sitting on the counter with your name written on a little note at the top “Oh, perfect!” Asmo claps his hands and tells Amaymon to add the other stuff you picked out to the total and add it to Asmo’s tap. Amaymon nods as he bags up the other items. “I hope you enjoy your new makeup MC. Don’t let Asmodeus go too overboard on your makeover.” Asmo laughs as he grabs your hand in his and the bags in the other “Amaymon! You know me~ I just can’t help myself.” you laugh and squeeze Asmo’s hand as you both leave the shop and head home.
That night Asmo does your makeup and after much whining and pouting convinces you to do his. It’s not the best, but you’re still learning!! His lipstick is a little smudged and the eyeliner is crooked, but Asmo loves it he takes so many pictures of both you and himself even posting them on devilgram with “Best birthday ever <3” in the caption.
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handelplayssims · 2 months ago
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Reaper's Reward - Week 3
Time for another week doing quests for Grim! This time, we seem to be thinking about Lady Mimsy and her knowledge of ambrosia. ...wonder if I can head off to Windenburg for extra points.
Two quests, one to Learn from the Lady by reading a tome we unlocked last week, and another to gather the first ingredient. Also it’s Explosion Day! ...I live in the UK and this is as close to Guy Fawks day as I’ll go with. Traditions include, fire, fireworks, airing grievances, and art and music spirit. Alex loves fireworks and the arts while Venus likes the fireworks. All in this household ignore being mean.But first, let’s go read the introduction to the Green Lady’s tome. And then do gardening. I am definitely also going to be giving the Fyres family this tome. I associate them with the lost Lord and Lady. Also Moria would probably go for it. Right, introduction to the book says that it skills gardening, fishing, and cooking. We’ll see if that actually hold out.
Sending Alexander to school alone today, it’s time for Bella to work-from-home. Her goals are to get to know sims in Uptown and to write a letter. Good to know. Ah, Bella making her breakfast counted off the cooking. Ah well. Anyway, time to work and we’re taking Geoffrey with us. He wants to meet someone new in a third location and Uptown will work for that. It’s morning so...let’s head over to the Uptown library! ...why library instead of lounge, you may ask? Well, I decided to have the richest sims in each area control what lots get built. Fengs wanted something quieter.
I see someone at the chess table so time to say hi! And- ...wow. Goeffrey is completely done with Friend of the World now. He is skilled after all that so, fair’s fair! ...let’s go for Neighborhood Confidante then. That mostly relies on random phone calls, but we can go out and say hello to other folks and point and nudge them in specific ways. Bella’s gotten to know chess lady, Bjorn, and Geoffrey. Now let’s get some donations before we head back home. Right, off for Bella to go and write a letter. Done and dusted. Let’s see...she needs to go on dates, but I want to wait for Alex to come home and do garden- mm. He has chess practice today. Welp.
Right, ambrosia society newsletter tells us to catch an angel fish! ...welp! New goals are to fish with bait or to travel to Caster’s Alley. Oh fun! Now Alex is going to get into the funky stuff! ...also gotta say, getting the pomegranate grafting just instilled in me FEAR. Can only nab apples cutting and my cherry trees aren’t grown yet. Hmm. Well, we got the book quest done already with Alexander doing his gourmet cooking. Good for him!
Past 8PM so let’s set off some fireworks since it’s properly dark now. By the by, you can order those off the computer, in case you forgot. Fireworks exploded, now to finish art and music for those who don’t have it. Venus shall practice singing and Alex shall head to the pipe organ. Also got Guidry to go and give another 1000 simoleans to the cause. Deal with it, ghost! You drop by every day so pay the dues!
And with that, everyone headed to bed. It’s time for-
Neighborhood Watch!
Henford-on-Bagley: The Vega household has moved in.
Another day, some more gardening to do for Alex. ...might as well also set up a slumber party. Alex is going to be spending most of his free time at chess so might as well work on other stuff.
...WELL. Geoffrey walked in on Bella autonomously flirting with Guidry. Uh, I declined getting him the jealous trait, but uh, negative sentiments time. Gonna have him yell at Bella for that. And...hmm. She does have a sad sentiment for betraying her partner. A smooth apology immedately cleared the negative sentiment though. Welp. But at least Geoffrey still has the fear of being cheated on. And Bella has the hurt sentiment from being yelled at. Anyway, Bella has a whim to do volunteer work so let’s let her and Geoffrey do some good deeds today. Comfortably compatible lifestyles sentiment for Geoffrey. Weeeeelp, so much for negative fallout from cheating. Except the fear.
Anyway, let’s see about getting started with Geoffrey’s aspiration. I don’t really care about expanding the family or finding new jobs for premades sooo...let’s see. Why don’t we have Mei Prescott go and befriend Bjorn Begersen. They’re both gloomy so why not? Huzzah! That worked! Let’s do one of those per day.
Had Geoffrey chat and talk to Venus, he wanted to mentor a child so perhaps teaching her about saying please and thank you and helping with homework would count.
It’s slumber party time! Instead of focusing on goals, I’m going to have Venus tell stories from the sleeping bag. It’s apart of her next aspiration stage after all! ...I am aboslutely chuckling about her telling the story about the Mother Plant though. Heheh. And that is done! Next is playing games. Sorry, chess table, you are now done and dusted and it is Simbles time! Simbles done. Now it’s past 1AM! It’s time for these kids to get some sleep. The biggest goal of a slumber party!
...I am honestly surprised Geoffrey is up this early in the morning. -shrug- Might as well have him befriend Kendall the butler.
And it’s 5AM. Finally time for-
Neighborhood Watch!
Eliza Pancakes in the Pancakes household has died. Eliza tried fixing the toilet and it randomly burst into flames!
-trumpets ring out- HALLELUJAH! For so long Bob has been dead and now it’s finally time for Eliza to join him. But also! It means I can do something new with that home. I have astronauts in Willow Creek and it feels slightly wrong to simply have the rocket ship not be a public utility. I’m going to get a community lot and make it into a maker space! And place a rocket ship on it.
Seiji Kato in the Kato household has died. Seiji stuck a finger in a plug and electricity came out.
...you I don’t know. RIP.
Gardening with Alex and making his own breakfast. Grind those skills! ...let’s end the slumber party slightly early because I want to go to school with Alexander today. Gold event so we get money and a new sleeping bag! Nice nice. Also I nabbed a graft off of the apple tree. Can’t give it to a cherry tree though, alas.
To school with Alexander! Finally filling up that social meter with him. Got to know his chess teammate Molly Prescott...and immedately became good friends with her. Welp, nicely done, I suppose. Huh. Got an invite to prom as friends with Molly. Might as well! We’ll see if I remember by prom time. WAIT, HE HAS A DATE. That sounds like a bad idea actually. Let’s uh, actually check in with Maria first. And give her a proper invite.
...but first, fishing. But I can bring Maria with me, at least. Asked her to prom and she accepted, very enthusiastically. Enough romance! Time to fish! I immediately spotted an angelfish pop up of a fishing hole I was interested in so let’s go!
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So pro-tip, you can see fish swimming in where they can be caught.
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IT WAS LITERALLY MY SECOND CAST! Game is being generous. 3 more casts of the fishing line to see what I get. Pffth, keep getting kitchen appliances and an apple. Anyway, let’s get some food and then we’ll head out to the magic realm.
...Molly walked up and asked to go to prom again! No! Well, now she has the hurt sentiment and Alex thinks she- wait no, we still have closer from happy memories sentiment. -shrug-
Also Tane Ngata decided to say eat right next to Alex at the small amusement park where I got supper for him, might as well say hello. He’s a fellow nerd so why not? And might as well convince him to join in the chess team.
And now, to the Magic Realm! ...and getting in there automatically finishes off the quest. Week done! That was quick. ...I am still in fear about the potental grafting issues that may come. Though pomegranate is not the rare plant I should worry about, I suppose. I know I can get that off of groceries.
Anyway, I got loads of fish! Let’s go home and set up a proper fish tank to showcase them in!
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Fish tank all nice and set up. Will keep the Angelfish fresh until it’s time comes.
Bella needs rest. Alex needs rest. Venus needs to head back to bed so she can be ready for school but might as well make a friendship braclet while she’s still up. And then send her to bed. Geoffrey...eh, let’s just advise our butler to make friends. That’ll do.
Neighborhood Watch!
Izzy Fabulous in the Fabulous household has died. Izzy heard a dad joke and laughed a little too hard.
Aww man! Rip our fabulously gay and slightly famous guy.
Emilia Lucas in the Lucas household has died. Emilia asked a rabbit if it wanted a carrot, but the rabbit chose violence.
Anyway, that’s this week! A pretty easy one, all things considered. See you all next week for more fun!
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jaywritesrps · 5 months ago
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Bro...your girl f'ing stepped in it again. Another day, another Sophia Bush gaffe. What exactly is wrong with her? Why does she think anyone cares about how she and trashlyn started dating? She's out with a new narrative in her WIP podcast, and this one might be the worst yet. Trying to say that trash was asking to be set up by her friends last summer. Yeah, no. Not buying it one bit. After getting out of a 13 year relationship with two actual babies at home? I don't think her first thought was, oh, I want to start dating right away. No, what likely happened is that they fell for each other in Cannes last June, AH came home and broke up with Ali, and then spent the rest of the summer following SB around while they devised their escape plans. This whole spin of, 'Oh, what a fun coincidence- we were both single' is just flat out wrong. But we know why she's trying to spin this. Because if she got caught cheating with a married woman, then there goes her whole public persona of being the wronged wife all those years ago, and she looks like lying douchebag (which she is). The truth is just so hard for these two women to come by. And all her lying does is perpetuate the hate they each get. Why not be f'ing honest? Hey, public, guess what? We met, we caught feelings, we decided we needed to explore it, and we did. We are much happier now. That sentiment is much easier to digest than the crap they're trying to peddle.
Also, she makes her gf look like a HORRIBLE mother by suggesting all this. Like, what kind of evil witch would insist on adopting a baby when they were so miserable in their marriage? And then actually leave it less than year later. Does she think Ocean's birth parents like hearing all this? They could have given him to someone else- a couple that was actually happy and planned to stay together.
None of it lands, and they both wind up looking like pathetic liars. Try the truth ladies- it will get you so much further!
Signed,
A Bushlyn hater
Sorry for taking a bit to answer this, I wanted to hear it first before talking about it and my dude... Sophia's biggest strength and biggest foe is that she is too transparent sometimes, especially when she is happy, cause it's in these moments it looks like she turns her brain off and pull some really dumb moves (like making a "joke"in a podcast about her wedding with Chad and it backfiring later when Chad replied). With that being said, It was at least reckless to talk about that stuff, cause Ashlyn is still in a custody battle, it can be used against them if Ali's lawyer want so, it's something too particular and that it's going to be used against her.
To me, it was stupid to talk about it, cause, even if it's true what Ashlyn said in that statement that it was clearly written by a PR team, and she and Ali had a deal to divorce, for all that matters, they were still married and still couple, so it sounded more that she was indirectly owning that she was indeed persuading a married woman and that the claims people are saying about her are true, and worse, that her gf was lying too when she said she put effort in fixing their marriage (how can you claim you put effort in fixing your marriage if you were asking a famous person to set you up with other famous persons with money, when you have a family trip scheduled? Can you guys see how this is a contradiction?) Sophia again is lighting herself on fire to clean someone that wouldn't do the same for her, cause I really doubt that if it was otherwise, Ashlyn would do the same for her.
This story she told also confirms another time the first gut feeling I had about this whole thing, that Ashlyn sure is using Sophia. Cause that story of "oh I was the one who asked her out" prove my point a couple of asks ago when I said that Ashlyn's plan was to befriend her straight resourceful friend, so she could get out of her divorce with a protection, but when the straight friend asked her out, she saw her golden ticket to also getting a good life, cause a nobody like her now has access to the white house and to a future president of United States.
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genogenocrazycatman · 2 years ago
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Throne Chapter 17
Throne [Archive of Our Own, FanFiction.Net]
Characters:  Original Female Character, Red Haired Shanks, Benn Beckman, Lucky Roo, Yasopp,
***
“I can be very disarming.”
“Looks like you’ve been disarmed,” I jabbed, not looking up at him.
Benn let out a loud laugh at that.
Shanks grinned. “You wound me.”
“Clearly, I’m not the only one.”
Hello people. So if you don’t know, what’s going on here then the simple version is that this a Shanks x OC fic.
If you follow me, and the One Piece stuff I write, then you’ve probably heard me talk about this fic. Hey look it’s finally here.
***
Chapter 17
"It's totally cheating!" Shanks said, looking at me like he couldn't believe the words coming out of my mouth.
 "It's only cheating if I use it during competition," I argued before taking a bite out of my BLT. "I used it after. Plus, no one ever specified that there was a no devil fruit rule."
 We were back at the diner, eating lunch because two days of breakfast in a row was an unachievable feat for Shanks by his own admission.
 "No devil fruit goes without saying.”
 I rolled my eye, as he continued.
 “It influences your state of mind. You make different decisions. You entered a drinking competition knowing there would be no downside."
 "But my devil fruit has a downside.”
 The night before, I had successfully drunk most of Shanks’s crew under the table, including both Luck and Yasopp. And I had done so 100% on my merit, despite current protests.
 I was the last one standing… at an angle, but still standing. Luck was slumped on the table, and Yasopp had fallen back on the floor. Most of the officers had chosen not to participate but instead to let me obliterate the rest of the crew, so the competition wasn't the stiffest, but I still won.
 The controversy arose afterward. I had gone outside, Shanks coming with ‘cause he most certainly thought I was going to puke or pass out in the bushes, probably both. Instead, I parked my ass down on the step, transformed into full Balor, and let the demon burn the alcohol out of my system. I was sober within fifteen minutes.
 He nodded slowly, bringing his fork to his mouth and taking a bite. After taking a second to pretend to mull it over, he said, "Eliza, my dear, you know that I know that there's no way you're buying your own bullshit right now."
 I let out an ugly snort, bursting into laughter. "I'll have it better rehearsed before I see the others. And since when are pirates so hung up on rules?"
 "They’re going to want a rematch."
 "You know who to put your money on."
 Shanks grinned, a devilish glint in his eyes. "What if I want to compete next time?"
 "Then I forfeit," I shrugged. "I've dodged death several times, and I'll be damned if the thing that actually kills me is a drinking contest."
 At my words, I noticed that Shanks’s expression briefly fell.
 I sighed, setting my sandwich down and gesturing for Shanks to get on with it.
 "What?" he asked, playing dumb.
 "I know you're not stupid."
 "I don't think your favorite shares that sentiment."
 "Trust me, it would be easier if you were dumb as you look."
 "You like the way I look," he argued.
 I looked at him expectantly.
 "Can I ask you something that you probably don’t want to answer?”
 My lips twitched as I thought back to Shanks sitting at my tiny kitchen table as I asked him that exact same thing. "You mean aside from that?"
 "Aside from that," he said, smiling warmly. His expression became more neutral. It was a controlled expression. Clearly, not trying to make light of whatever he was planning on asking but making a point not to be so overly concerned as to set me off in any way. "Tel shot you in the face, didn't he?"
 I leaned back against the back of the booth.
 "Can you believe he still almost missed? So nervous. With a debilitated target at point-blank range and almost misses. Fuck, all that, and I didn't even die."
 "Almost?"
 "Almost," I confirmed, reaching into my pocket to pull out my safety case.
 I pulled the lower lid of my right eye with my index finger, allowing my glass eye to slide out just enough for me to grab it and pull it the rest of the way. I quickly placed it in its case and shoved it in my pocket.
 "So much for 'right between the eyes, huh?'" I asked.
 "He got the 'right' part down," Shanks said.
 I snorted out a laugh, feeling myself relax again. I picked up a fry and popped it into my mouth.
 “I don’t remember the initial pain,” I said. “My guess is the shock kept me from feeling much of anything. The adrenaline was enough for me to transform and get the hell out of there.”
 It got blurry from that point. "I remember collapsing in the back of the tavern, where Rayne called Gene, who came over and did first aid. Shit. Getting shot was the easy part. Two old bats fighting over whether to yank your eye out. That was fucking brutal. Fortunately, I passed out. Then I woke up in a fucking cave missing my eye."
 "And Tel?"
 If any of my brothers had seen me, it would've been game over for the entire island, save for Rayne and Gene. And admittedly, there were a few days when I first woke back up where I was hurting and feeling sorry for myself in the goddamn dark that I just sat there and thought, 'Good.' If my brothers came through and wrecked everyone's shit, I wasn't going to do a damn thing to stop them.
 I would manage wherever they shipped me off to next. I wasn’t going to be happy about it, but I could adjust.
 But then I started to get restless and agitated.
 Tel and the others tore through the tavern, the store, and both Rayne and Gene’s homes, trying to find me, trying to find my body. They even tried to find Rayne’s hideout, only to be disappointed when she took them to a decoy filled with fancy bottles of cheap booze.
 I had put my actual life on the line to keep everyone safe, and those fuckers, Tel, had the audacity to shoot me while I was down. And they were going to win. They were going to hell, but I would be shipped off at the end of the day, which is what they wanted from the beginning. A new start on another island, making myself smaller for everyone else's comfort.
 After their days of searching, they finally gave up. They never believed her or Gene, but they couldn’t find me, and after a few days, I think they realized that I would probably be healed up to fight back if they did find me. So, they stopped their searches and reported to the rest of the village that I was no more.
 A week later, under the cover of night, I slipped back to the tavern into my trashed apartment.
 As I sorted through all my shit, I grabbed Shank's journal leafing through it. The worn pages comforted me as I flipped through his scribbled trials and shenanigans.
 Standing amid all my things strewn about, I made up my mind. I still had a few weeks before one of my idiot brothers arrived.
 Rayne figured out immediately what I was thinking. I thought she might try to talk me out of it, but instead, she called Gene over, and together, they started my numerous planning sessions, which were more like cram school: geography, weather, navigation, and sailing.
 In the back of my mind, hidden behind the tidal waves of information being dumped on me, another plot was steadily coming together.
 I put it into effect in the last two weeks leading up to my departure. It was hard trying to instill what decades of paranoia felt like within two weeks, but I made do.
 I started small with the feeling of being watched, lurking around corners and windows like a fucking idiot.
 Then I got bolder. Things would end up lost, only to reappear right where he left them when he asked someone else about them. Items he was sure were in his house ended up at his office. Things that had been thrown out were back where they started over and over and over again.
 I watched delightfully as the paranoia took root in Tel. He knew something was up. And I was sure he thought it was me. But he didn’t have proof. He didn’t have proof it wasn’t either. Everyone knew he had shot me. They also knew I had run off, but where and how I ended up remained unknown.
 But they had chosen to believe that I was dead or at least that I had been run off. I had heard from Rayne how they had celebrated in the middle of town. She had closed the tavern out of protest and scolded them for their callousness, reminding them that their celebration came as she and Gene were in mourning.
 I applauded her performance.
 The others, either genuinely delusional or, more likely, unwilling to face the reality that I was alive and that I was out there, brushed Tel off, telling him that it was just that ‘protector instinct’ that had him on the edge.
 By the end of the second week, he was constantly looking over his shoulder, so it didn’t take much to get him out of the house. With a few broken branches and the brushing of leaves, he was on the chase, following me deeper into the jungle, beyond the village's limits, far from his cronies, far from anyone who could hear him.
 And it was only after I went silent, as I hid from my perch in the trees and Tel was surrounded by nothing but silence, that he realized what he'd done, where he was, that he was completely and totally alone for the first time in years.
 I waited it out, letting him survey his surroundings and settle his nerves as the more he looked, the more he realized nothing was amiss.
 I'm sure he went through all of the usual thoughts. ‘There's nothing there. I can't believe I did that. I must be going insane.’ Just as I saw him shake his head and turn to return the way he came, I dropped, finally revealing myself.
 At the time, I hadn't planned to hurt him, at least not seriously. Maybe I'd finally give him that kick in the ass that he deserved. I just wanted to give him a glimpse of the hell that he had put me through.
 But then he looked right at me, both eyes narrowing in on the patch that had on to protect my still healing eye socket, and he still managed to muster up the arrogance to put his nose up at me and gloat about shooting me.
 I had protected his village. I had protected his business. I had protected his home. I had protected his neighbors. I had protected him. I protected his wife. I had protected his children.
 And he, who only had the balls to attack me after I had already gotten my ass kicked by pirates who would’ve overrun the village, had the nerve to call my survival a fluke and promise to finish me off.
 That pushed me over the edge. "When Shanks was here, he told you that the only reason he left you alive was because you were more a nuisance to me dead than alive. But I don't think that's true anymore."
 I didn’t actually kill him. I almost did. I thought about it.
 I beat him within an inch of his life. And there was nothing that he could do about it. If I had time and didn’t know that Gene and Rayne were waiting to see me off, I would’ve kept at it for hours.
 Instead, after he was far too brutalized to fight back, I grabbed him by his broken and bloody jaw to force him to look at me, hand slowly rising up his face, thumb brushing over his cheek underneath his right eye socket.
 “Something to remember me by,” I had said, letting out a wave of conqueror’s haki.
 The night I left, as I sailed away from Aurora after having left Tel’s battered body in the middle of town, I thought about the look on his face before I plunged my thumb into his eye socket. There was the same raw fear in his eyes that had been there when Shanks had overwhelmed and overpowered him with haki alone.
 Shanks leaned back on his side of the booth. The movement pulled me out of my own memories. He looked content, with a proud smile on his face. “Good.”
 I shook my head. Only Shanks would beam with pride after hearing that I nearly killed a man and did fully rip his eye out with my bare hands. “You’re unhinged.”
 “I’m endeared.”
 I briefly thought of the night the Red-Haired crew left as I rowed Shanks back to the ship. “You shouldn’t be.”
 “I shouldn’t be,” he agreed, quoting me back at myself.
 “But I’m happy that you are.”
 Shanks’s grin got wider, and I couldn’t help but mirror it.
 “We’re both fucking unhinged.”
***
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***
Master List | Mobile Version
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astaroth1357 · 4 years ago
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Oh! How about the brothers with a very emotionally open MC? Like, they ain't ashamed to cry or express their emotions because they think that it's healthy to speak about your emotions to others! And they're also really good at telling what people are really feeling. Please and thank you very much! And congrats on 1,500 followers! You deserve it!
The Demon Brothers Reaction to a Very Emotionally Intelligent MC
Let’s be honest, in a game centered around resolving interpersonal family drama, this is kind of what the MC has to be canonically. Also um… I made the decision, for whatever reason, to listen to the Grand Escape by Radwimps while writing this, and uh, it got… deeper than intended. Whoopsie. 😅 I guess that's the hazard when you're so dependent on what you hear to set the tone for what you write… Sometimes you make a questionable decision and you mess up at the foundations 😕 My bad. 
BIG, BIG Spoilers for Part One (Lessons 1-20)
Lucifer
To be honest, he took it as a sign of weakness for some time.
Lucifer closes his emotions off to others because he views them as a vulnerability... This is why he wasn't completely surprised that the powerless human they brought to the Devildom was, in his eyes, overly emotional.
They were never afraid to say what they felt, show sadness to others, or even admit their fears… Though he appreciated the honesty, he wrote it off as a sign of human fragility and assumed they wouldn't last long. Not unless they toughened up and started to shut themselves off like him...
But that never happened. And one by one, he watched his brothers get won over by that feeble, emotional mess… He didn't understand it nor did he like it. At one point he even swore to himself that he wouldn't let whatever spell they casted on the others affect him too.
At least, until the attic incident came to light and he finally realized that the human wasn't a mess at all. 
When Belphegor escaped and the bombshell that he had been holding finally came to light, he honestly felt lost for the first time in centuries… He didn’t know how to approach the topic, he just wanted to hide away and let it all sort itself out… but they wouldn't let him.
 It amazed him how easy it was for the MC to empathize with his brothers and even himself through the whole mess. It was like they knew how everyone felt before they even had to voice it… He loathed to admit it, but for that moment they looked even more composed and capable than he did…
It was their handling of Belphie that really sealed it for him, though. A weak, pathetic, powerless little human talking down a being far beyond their capacity to fight? Then still offering him some comfort in the aftermath? He couldn’t have pulled that off... He’s long since forgotten how.
The MC managed to open his eyes to what emotional strength looked like and, from that point on, he never doubted them again.
Mammon
Mammon's go-to approach to feelings is unconvincing denial and his brothers generally aren't much better... So actually being open and straightforward with one’s feelings is almost a foreign concept to him.
So when the MC got dropped into his life it threw him through a loop. They were willing to just… say what they felt whenever? They’d cry when they needed to, laugh whenever they wanted, and generally tell people how they felt about things openly and honestly? What?
Weren’t they scared of being teased or made fun of? You can’t be that open down in Hell! Demons would take advantage of you!
And yet, the longer he spent with them the more he started to kind of get it… And then he started to genuinely love it.
They didn’t mind when he’d bawl at movies or talked about when his brothers were bothering him… Sometimes he didn’t even need to say anything to them. They’d just see something was off in how he was acting and offer a hug... No questions asked. No shame involved.
It was refreshing. Eye-opening. Hell, even comforting to just be himself for them. Sure, he still had to keep up appearances in front of his brothers to keep from being mocked, but when they were alone? He truly could act however he felt like for the first time in a very, very long time... And he treasured that.
Leviathan
Emotions are… a thing for Levi and not a thing he's that well equipped to deal with either…
So of course, he initially felt envious of the MC when they came down to the Devildom. They had no problem with navigating their feelings. They didn’t mind talking about them or crying or admitting when they were nervous and even worse? They could actually handle it all.
Levi doesn’t tend to make his emotions very secretive either, but when he got into a mood he usually couldn’t dig himself out of it... It doesn’t help that his brothers were so used to his complaining that they’d ignore his self-deprecation rather waste their time contradicting him... 
When he first saw them in action, though, he had walked in on them crying, but they didn’t tell him to leave or try to hide their face. They just let him say what he needed to while they let the tears run their course... then explained to him what the problem was later. They weren’t ashamed… Hell, they even looked like they felt better to have it off their chest…
How come he never felt any better after he had his episodes...? Why did he still feel like a worthless piece of shit all the time?? What kind of cheat code did they use for that?! It’s not fair!
Little did he know, talking feelings out to yourself (or your goldfish) is one thing. But talking to someone who actually wants to help is another thing entirely.
The first time he went on one of his rants, the MC just watched him quietly. It was like he was tearing down a house meant for demolition...and then they started picking through the pieces. They didn’t try to shame him hating himself, they just started pulling out things he should love instead. Stuff he never even considered before…
After that point, they became very good at noticing when he was going to a dark place and intervening before he could beat himself down again... After a while, he started leaving his room when he felt that way so he could go find them and talk. 
If his mind was an ocean then, for the first time ever, he finally felt like he had a way to weather the storms...
Satan
Didn't trust it, didn't trust them, and thought it was all an act for the longest time...
Satan knows a thing or two about putting up a front, so he's the most skeptical of other people's intentions…
When he first met them and saw open they were with their emotions, he thought it was all some kind of act. Like they were just trying to gain sympathy or lure everyone in so they could manipulate them later… But he wasn't buying it.
While he watched the rest of his brothers fall to their charms, he counted himself lucky as the smart one. He thought he could see the game they were playing and he wouldn't let himself be tricked into it...
… But then the whole book fiasco happened and he found himself around the human more often. Not only did their openness really seem genuine, they actually listened patiently to his complaints about Lucifer, his birth, his rank, his rage... everything. Just nodding along and watching him intently…
After a while, he started to question if they were even listening anymore so he questioned them. Point blank. He wanted to know what they thought and… their answer surprised him.
“I think you want to be your own person.”
To him, that answer came right out of left field. What about any of what he was just saying had to do with his identity??
But the more he thought about it, the more he realized it had everything to do with it. And they deduced it so quickly from just a few conversations… He was impressed (and somewhat terrified) to have been read so easily...
For a while, he just had to study them. He wanted to know more about what kind of skills they used to understand him so effortlessly...
Though he never quite got a clear answer out of them, he found that he could respect their talent regardless and, just this once, let himself trust someone else wholeheartedly...
Asmodeus
If you're looking for a demon in touch with the emotions, then you don't have to look much further than Asmo. But even he can have blinders on sometimes…
When he met the MC, he actually liked how open they were about their feelings. He even shared their sentiments so he wasn’t bothered at all.
But when he bunked with them and Simeon in the Demon Lord's Castle, he got to see a different side of them…
After Simeon dressed him down about his narcissism, Asmo did his best to just gaslight the whole thing and put it behind him. … But the MC was watching.
Something must have tipped them off. Maybe a glance at the floor or look in his eye... Maybe just how utterly incapable he was to acknowledge Simeon's words… but they noticed that it bothered him.
"Don't let it get to you... I think you're doing great down here."
"Well of course I am, sweetie. Why wouldn't I be?"
Their reassuring words puzzled him at first... How was he supposed to take them? Were they pitying him? If he were Lucifer, he'd have half a mind to obliterate them for that alone...
But they didn't seem like the type… Asmo could read people just as well as they could, he knew sincerity when he saw it. Were they just trying to help…?
He kept that thought to himself throughout their time together in the Castle. Good heart or not, he didn't want to make getting a pact easy for them. He’d never bow to just anyone.
But after they proved their worth, it all started to click for him. This human was trying to reach out to him when they thought he was hurting… They didn't just write him off as shallow and self-absorbed. They were concerned for his feelings even when he wouldn't acknowledge them…
Asmo hung extra close to the human after that. He found someone willing to look beyond the image he worked so hard to keep up... Even if he didn't need their help quite like his brothers, he could see their effort and loved them even more for it.
Beelzebub
Beel is a straightforward guy who can appreciate straightforward people so he and the MC got along pretty well from the start.
He liked that he didn’t have to read between the lines with them. If they were upset, they’d tell him. If they needed to vent, they’d warn him. If they were happy and having a good time, they didn’t feel the need to hide it. It made life so much easier for him…
Of course, he couldn’t actually tell how good they were with emotions until he started opening up about Belphie, Lilith, and everything that went down before they all became demons…
He was kind of amazed how easy it was to speak to them, even during the painful parts... They never pushed him too much or pried for answers he wasn’t comfortable giving, nor did they make him feel bad for what happened to Lilith or missing his brother...
Honestly, they always seemed to know just how he felt about every new detail he told them. When he finally came clean about his guilt over the whole thing, they didn’t look shocked or surprised… If anything they looked just as pained as he did to have received the confirmation…
He found it oddly comforting to speak to them about pretty much anything after that. He knew that they’d listen and understand no matter what he put in front of them, and after they helped Belphie…? He’d happily love and trust them for the rest of his days...
Belphegor
"It wasn't your fault."
Those four words still ring in Belphie's ears from time to time… An echoing reminder of sorts…
He spent so long wrapped up in his own guilt, unable to talk about it to his brothers, that it turned him bitter and angry… He felt like he was the reason they were all in this mess to start with and that everybody else knew it too…
But hey, he'd say, at least down here there wouldn't be any humans around to ruin things. No humans there to steal away his family like before...
Which is why he snapped when Diavolo said they were introducing humans to the Devildom. How else was he supposed to react? They were just tempting fate for another disaster! Hadn't they learned anything at all??
While he was locked in the attic and the human came to his aid, he honestly took joy in deceiving them...
...At least at first. But on repeat visits, he started to feel his resolve slip.
They listened to him. They seemed genuinely interested in helping him and invested in his family's struggles... They looked like they cared for his brothers and even made efforts to reach out to him too... They told him about their worries and troubles in complete sincerity… with total trust...
He'd spend hours reminding himself that humans weren't meant to be trusted and all reasons he had to hate them... Repeating it all like a mantra until he felt convinced again. On the day he escaped, he finally had the pleasure of killing them himself...
But then, like a roach that just won't die, they came back and told him about Lilith… all before they said, "It wasn't your fault."
No one prompted them to say it. He'd never voiced it before... It was like they just knew... Like they could read the pain in his eyes this entire time…
He still doesn't quite share their stance on, "It's always okay to cry" so he doesn't like to dwell on the complete breakdown he had after that… He wished his brothers weren't there to see the Human-Hating Belphegor accepting a hug from them while he trembled and cried into their shoulder…
But he couldn't deny that he needed it. And from that day on, he’s accepted that he needed them as well...
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missdawnandherdusk · 4 years ago
Text
Ten Things I Hate About You
Muggle!Born!Reader X Draco
Summary: Request: @thelostandweeping If it is possible may I request a Draco x Muggle reader. Reader is really bad at potions so Snape has Draco tutor the reader. The reader doesn't like Draco but he finds her bluntness and her ability to be aloof interesting and tries to win her over. She later shows she's actually very kind and sweet. They become best friends and later together.
A/n: Okay this... but add a bit of Shakespeare and ABBA and you’ve got yourself a deal. This is super cute and a bit angsty and 100% pining. Let me know what you think! It’s currently 2am and I’m crying over these dorks. Love you guys so much 
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“Not Malfoy!” I distressed, standing. “Professor, please. I need to pass this class,”
“And you will do so, if Mr. Malfoy tutors you,” Snape hissed. “I don’t have to do this Miss Y/l/n, I could watch you fail and be quite fine with it.”
Clenching my fists, I took a deep breath and sat back down. Snape’s eyes narrowed at me.
“You and Mr. Malfoy will meet here every Friday afternoon.”
“Yes, Professor,” I sulked. “Thank you, Professor,”
“Now get out of my sight,” He snapped, and I stood, huffing out of his office and into the hall, nearly running over Malfoy.
“Watch it, mudblood,” He snapped, shoving me aside.
“Watch yourself,” I snarled, shoving him back.
He looked surprised at me, as if no one had dared to ever retaliate against him. Stupid self- righteous prat. That I needed. I made me loathe him more. I growled and stormed away, throwing my stuff onto the table in the Great Hall, sitting beside my friends.
“Well, that’s not a pretty face,” Ernie gave me a teasing look. “Snape that bad, huh?”
“He’s making Malfoy tutor me!” I lamented. “I think I’d rather fail,”
Shocked gasps rose around my small group of friends.
“Look here he comes,” Susan nodded to the door and sure enough, the blond prick was storming his way over here with murder in his eyes.
“You!” He sneered, stalking up to my table.
“What about me?” I gave him a cold look.
“You’re a filthy little mudblood who just ruined my Friday afternoons!” He shouted.
“And you’re a heinous misogynistic asshole who I have to deal with every Friday afternoon instead of going to Quidditch practice so forgive me if I’m not weeping at your feet begging for forgiveness,” I snapped, standing, my arms folded.
Onlookers of our conversation let out a low gasp of surprise as Malfoy stammered for the next thing to say. I raised an eyebrow at him, waiting.
“Cat got your tongue?” A smirk spread across my face. He drew his wand, pointing it at me. I didn’t flinch.
“Mr. Malfoy!” I heard the familiar voice of McGonagall. “Wand away! Unless you wish to serve detention,”
My smirk grew to a grin as I watched Malfoy stomp his foot and storm out of the room, shoving a few first years out of the way. A few clapped and cheered at the encounter before getting scolded by McGonagall.
I dreaded Friday. More than I dreaded anything. I’d rather never listen to music again if it meant I didn’t have to listen to Malfoy teach me about Potions. Okay, well, maybe the situation wasn’t that dire... but I was considering it.
“You’re early,”
I hadn’t even closed the door and he was already snapping at me.
“Hello Malfoy,” I gritted, turning to see him already standing over a cauldron, ingredients laid out around the table.
“Let’s just get this over with?” He nodded me over, his eyes still trained on the knife and leathery skin in his hands.
I shed my robe and rolled up my sleeves, going to hover beside him.
“Can you tell me what this is?” His voice lost some of the snap to it as he slid the crushed hide into the bubbling brew.
“If I could do you think I’d be here?” I huffed, grabbing my textbook and notes, flipping through the pages.
“Oh, for the love of Merlin,” Draco snatched the book from my hands.
“Give it back!” I shouted, reaching for the textbook.
“You won’t get better if you’re cheating,” He disappeared the book with a wave of his hand.
“That was my book! Malfoy, I swear to god!”
We were toe to toe, inches from each other. There was a calm, careful, infuriating smile on his face and anger on mine.
“Now, tell me, little mudblood,” He took a careful step back. “What potion is this?”
I narrowed my eyes at him and with a deep breath I looked over at the grey sludge that boiled in the pot. My eyes took inventory of the ingredients that were laid around the desk.
“Knotgrass?” I guessed, picking up a jar inspecting it.
Draco gave a seldom nod. We went on like that, until I had named all of the ingredients that were before us.
“I know this!” I groaned, rubbing my face. “I should know this!” 
“Well, why don’t you?” Malfoy smirked. “It’s quite simple,”
“If it was simple,” I gritted out. “I wouldn’t be here,”
My book was suddenly back in his hands.
“It’s easier to find a potion by looking at the index. You know the ingredients, find them and cross reference,” He handed it back to me.
“That’s... actually really smart,”
I took the book and flipped to the back. It took some time, but I eventually flipped to the page I felt was right: Polyjuice Potion.
“Well done,” He didn’t smile, but he wasn’t quite scowling. “Perhaps there is hope for you yet, little mudblood.”
“Watch it,” I growled. “I’m still not above punching you,”
“What would you like me to call you then? Little shrew? Spitfire? Gorgon?” His smirk was back.
“Oh, kiss a dementor, Malfoy,” Grabbing my things, I ditched him and the Polyjuice Potion, heading outside into the setting sun to clear my head with some fresh air.
______________________________
Draco sat back, leaning against the table, watching you storm out. Your adamant hatred for him was quite amusing. The fact that you needed him to pass Potions and your loathing of him, made him laugh to himself as he began to clean up with a quick flick of his wand.
“I am to glad to see that my office is still intact,” Snape mused, flowing into the room. “I can’t say I had high hopes for you two,”
“It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” Draco admitted. “She’s... bearable.”
“Is that sentiment I hear Mr. Malfoy?” Snape raised an eyebrow.
“Not at all,” Draco scoffed. “A challenge.”
“You’re absolutely daft!” Pansy dismayed later that night in the common room. “You really think you can tame that shrew?”
“Do you doubt me?” Draco raised an eyebrow. “Besides, I wrangled you in, and I put up with Crabbe and Goyle, and you have not been to a family dinner of mine. Y/n? She’s a piece of cake.”
“Ten galleons says you’re wrong,” Pansy held out her hand.
“You’re on,” Draco grinned as he shook it.
The next Friday, you just as riled and furious as you had been last Friday, and it was almost enough to make Draco laugh. Every other girl seem to... how did you put it? Weep at his feet begging for forgiveness? That seemed about right. But you? Oh, he was right, you were a little spitfire. Especially when you were frustrated because you couldn’t figure out how to brew Sleeping Draught. He left that tutoring session smiling to himself, watching your livid form head down the hall.
The next day Draco wandered down to the Quidditch Pitch, surprised to see you out there alone, running drills. You had mentioned giving up practice to let him tutor you. Thinking back to his bet with Pansy, he shed his robe and grabbed his broom from the closet, changing quickly, and headed out into the air after you.
“Bloody hell!” You screamed, nearly falling off your broom. “What the fuck is wrong with you Malfoy!?” You hovered feet from him, covered in sweat and dirt.
“Well, at the moment, the chance of losing a bet,” He grinned.
“Shouldn’t have taken it then, asshole,” You rolled your eyes, balancing on your broom as you stretched out your arms. “But I meant why are you here? Are you following me now?”
“Not particularly, I leave my stalking abilities for Potter. Nothing to waste on a mudblood.” Oh, he loved watching the fire grow in your eyes as he called you that.
“Piss off, Malfoy.” You snapped, flying away from him, taking a lap around the pitch.
He followed. You sped up. So did he. When you pulled straight up, it was all too easy to follow. He could hear your aggravated growl as he chased you around the pitch. You stopped short and he nearly ran into you, having to swerve out of the way. Your face was a mask of calm and disgust as you shook your head and landed, heading for the locker rooms.
“How’s the shrew?” Pansy asked later that week. “Still think you can tame her?” 
“Patience Pans,” Draco chuckled. “These things take time,”
It wasn’t hard to figure out your schedule that week. It was even easier to make sure that he was there just long enough for you to notice him and then watch your mood sour as you stalked out of whatever room the two of you shared.
“Hey there, Spitfire,” Draco grinned leaning against your table at the library.
“What?” You snapped, not looking up at him. “Oh, I’m sorry I forgot, in this society, being male and an asshole makes you worthy of my time.” You shot him a deathly glare. “Bugger off, Malfoy,”
“You hate me, don’t you?” He smirked. “I get under that muggle skin of yours,”
“I really don’t think you warrant that strong an emotion,” I leaned back in my chair.
“Maybe another strong emotion then? Because they say if a girl constantly rips of a guy it means she likes him.”
“Am I that transparent?” Your face fell flat with you tone. “I want you. I need you. Oh baby, oh baby.” Rolling your eyes, you went back to your book. “Go find some other girl to fuck, Malfoy,”
“Ooh, see but that, there. Who needs affection when I have blind hatred?” He grinned and sat beside you, taking your book.
“Malfoy!” You hollered, only to be scolded by Pince. “Give me my book.”
“Now where have I heard that before.” Draco flipped through the pages of your book. “Ugh, a muggle book, I should have known,”
You snatched it from his hands and cradled it to your chest.
“You wouldn’t know a good book if I hit you in the face with it,” You snarled, grabbing your bag and storming off.
The few students who were watching the encounter quickly turned back to their work as Draco glanced around the shelves of books, noticing the missing space your book left in the shelf and the plethora of similar books.
“Shakespeare?” Draco mused, drawing a book into his hands. 
________________________________
“He’s obsessed! He won’t leave me alone!” I cried in frustration. “I wish he’d go back to stalking Potter because I’m sick of it!”
“Have you ever considered that maybe he likes you?” Hannah asked.
“Likes me?” I snorted. “Ah, yes. Because calling me a mudblood, or a shrew is just a tell of flirting,”
“He called you a mudblood?” Ernie demanded.
“Calm down, I can handle myself.” Rolling my eyes, I sulked, standing. “I’m going to the pitch, anyone wanna join?”
There was a resounding chorus of ‘no’s. Which was probably a good thing. I needed some time alone to think and blow off steam. After a few hours of running drills I headed back to the locker rooms. Wiping my face with a towel, I jumped nearly a foot when I saw that I wasn’t alone.
“For the love of god, Draco!” I shouted. “What are you doing?”
“Well, hello to you too,” He smirked. “And I do believe I have quidditch practice,”
I pursed my lips and slammed my locker shut. His irritating casual conversation still had the ability to make my blood boil.
“I hope you fall to your death,” I snapped, heading towards the girl’s showers.
“Well, there’s a way to get a bloke’s attention,” He smirked, leaning effortlessly against his locker.
“My mission in life,” I smiled cheerfully. “And I’ve obviously struck your fancy, so the world makes sense again,” I sighed wistfully and deadpanned.
“See you Friday,” He smiled politely.
I let out a sound of disgust and shoved down the urge to go back in there and punch him in his perfect face. The days until Friday seemed to fly by, mocking me with their abruptness.
Taking a deep breath, I walked into Snape’s office, where Draco was waiting for me, the same lazy smile on his face. I didn’t say a word as I shed my coat and rolled up my sleeves, taking out my book and notes.
“What in the bloody hell is that?” Draco stammered, almost knocking over a vial of Wormwood—I think.
“What?” I looked around then behind me. “What are you playing at?” 
“Around your neck!” He gestured, annoyed.
“Headphones?” I chuckled, easily sliding them off. “You know... music? Your lot do have that sort of thing, don’t they?”
“I don’t see what... headphones—” As if the word was foreign to his tongue, “—have to do with music,” Draco scoffed.
“You can listen to music anywhere?” I slid them off from around my neck and pulled up my portable CD player from my bag. “Have you really never seen a CD player or headphones?” I was baffled. “I don’t know what I’d do without music,”
“CD?” Draco frowned at the player in my hands.
“Yeah, Mom just send me ABBA’s Gold album and I’m a bit obsessed,” A slight pink touched my cheeks. “I’ve been wanting it so long,”
“ABBA?”
I laughed and shook my head, shoving both my headphones and CD player into my bag. “Maybe I’ll show you one day,”
It took less time than expected for me to figure out that he had a cauldron of Veritaserum in front of me. And maybe I genuinely smiled at Draco and fought the urge to hug him because, Potions really was making sense to me now. I would never understand how he managed it, but he could teach it in a way that I understood.
“Hey Draco?” I paused at the door on my way out. He looked up from cleaning, his careful blue eyes meeting mine. “Thanks,”
I hated that I wasn’t annoyed at him when he found me in the library again.
“So, is this for Muggle Studies then?” Draco nodded to my book, sitting the incorrect way in the chair next to mine, resting his arms against the back, almost nonchalant.
“No,” I rolled my eyes, slipping off my headphones, pausing the CD. “On contrary to popular belief, we muggles aren’t uncivilized. I do enjoy things like reading and art and music,” The annoyance in my voice was false.
“I’m aware,” Draco grinned that lazy smile again.
“Oh, so you think you know me then? Have enough from stalking me these past weeks?” I raised an eyebrow.
“Not like we’ve spent the last few Fridays together...” He drawled. “And I think I’m getting there.”
“The only thing you know about me is that I’m muggle and suck at potions,” I muttered, turning back to my book.
“You’re interesting,” Draco shrugged, causing me to backtrack and frown.
“Is that all I am to you? Something to ogle at? Maybe get a laugh in here and there with your pureblood buddies?” My voice went back to being venomous. “Just because you're pureblood, doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter!” I grabbed my belongings and stormed out of the library, fighting tears.
________________________________
Draco hated that you were right. And he hated that he almost made you cry as well. He hated that you could see right through him. And he hated that he felt any of this at all.
“The bet’s off,” Draco hissed to Pansy.
“You know what that means...” She grinned mischievously. “That means you have to do my homework for a week, and you pay up.”
Draco forked over the coins, not missing them in the slightest.
“She too much for you then? Not able to tame our little mudblood shrew?” A wicked grin curled on her face.
“Don’t call her that,” Draco snapped. “You don’t know a thing about her,”
“She’s a mudblood, Draco,” Pansy sat up, looking concerned. “Don’t tell me you actually have feelings for her?”
Draco didn’t have an answer for that.
He didn’t have an answer for any of this. As he laid in bed that night, staring up at the satin green that draped over his bed, all he could think about was the hurt on your face and in your words. It was different from your remarks before, those he could brush off easily. But not the tears in your eyes or the betrayal in your voice. Pansy was right, he shouldn’t care at all. You were beneath him. A mudblood, muggle born, shrew.
But he fucked up.
Because now you were so much more precious than that and he let you do it to him. He gave you the place in his heart where you resided.
That Friday he almost didn’t expect you to show. When you did, after the initial shock, there was an apology rushing to his lips, but held back by his pride. You barely looked at him that day. Your movements were muted, gentle. You murmured soft answers.
“Why are you doing this?” It was the first thing you said to him that wasn’t some ingredient. 
“Tutoring you?” He raised an eyebrow.
You shook your head and took a deep breath. “All of it—what's in it for you?” Your eyes met his and he felt like you were reading him like one of your books. “What’s your game, Malfoy?” It hurt more than he thought as you switched back to the use of his surname.
“So, I have to have a motive to be with you?” He snapped back defensive.
“You tell me.” The tone of your words had him weak at the knees, gripping at the table for support.
“Can’t I just enjoy your company?” Draco snapped, slamming the book closed. “We’re done for the day,” He shook his head, looking down at the table beneath his hands.
You left without another word, but a glance back to him that had him reeling. He wanted to call out after you, but the words were trapped by fear and uncertainty.
Draco still watched you in the halls and in class whenever he could steal a glance. You seemed to always have your headphones in and your head down, nose in a book. Snape informed him about mid-week that your grades were adequate and that the tutoring would end promptly. He should have been happy about that. And a month ago he would have been more than glad to be rid of you... but he made a huge mistake.
He fell for you instead.
And you hated him. For everything he was and is. He couldn’t find it in himself to be angry that you closed yourself off from him. He didn’t blame you. Things were as it should be, and the world could spin around and not threaten to implode.
It was absolutely ludicrous. He shouldn’t care. He shouldn’t be doing this.
Every night, he slipped on headphones, and fell asleep to ABBA singing about love and loss behind the safety of his closed bed curtains. Sometimes he could almost hear your gentle voice whisper the lyrics, broken and defeated. Maybe he whispered a few back to the memory of you. Maybe a tear or two slipped out.
Maybe he sent you a note in class. Maybe it said that he was sorry and understood why you hated him. Maybe he deserved to watch you crumple it up and shove it into your bag and not give him a second glance.
Maybe enough was enough.
Determined, one crisp spring morning, Draco rose. After tucking away his guilty pleasure, he didn’t bother with house colors as he pulled a jumper over his dark wash jeans, scouring the castle grounds for you. It shouldn’t have been that hard, he had your scheduled memorized for Merlin’s sake, but still you evaded him.
To be fair, you didn’t evade him at all, he just wasn’t paying attention to your curled-up form in the Quidditch stands.
He called your name and gritted his teeth when you didn’t look up. He tried again. 
“Go away,” You pulled your arms tighter around yourself.
He didn’t. Instead he sat down beside you, not saying a word. You two sat in silence that about killed him when you spoke up again.
“Did you win... your little bet?” Your voice was broken. “Did you tame the shrew?” 
“You knew?” Draco gaped.
A soft shrug fell from your shoulder. “I know what people say about me...” A sigh escaped your lips. “And Pansy’s always one to hold anything she can over me. She’s my cousin, you know... my mom was a squib...”
A frown fell on Draco’s face at the new information. How had he not known that? Pansy was always near him and well, he did stalk you for about a month. Maybe you had been right, and you were nothing more than a spectacle to him until that last week...
Your careful eyes were trained on the empty pitch before him. No emotion was evident on your face... maybe an air of melancholy.
“I... I’m sorry,” Draco glanced down. “You were right about me... about everything.” 
“I really don’t want to talk about...” You sighed. “Things we’ve gone through...”
A smile tugged at Draco’s lips. He knew those words. And it was so like you to quote them at him. He wondered how many other times you had gotten away with quoting song lyrics at him.
______________________________
I could feel Draco’s eyes study my face and the small smile that rested on his. I glanced over at him an eyebrow raised in question.
“You can’t just quote song lyrics at me,” He toyed, the familiar irritating smirk on his lips.
“I can do whatever I please,” I snapped, my cheeks flushing that I had been caught. Then it dawned on me. “Wait—”
A laugh escaped his lips. A wonderful sound that I had never heard before. One that I wanted to hear again.
“I was curious...” He shrugged, nonchalant seeming.
“You... listened to ABBA? A muggle CD? And you... know the words?” I gawked at him. “Who the hell are you and what have you done with Draco Malfoy?” I couldn’t help the smile on my lips.
“I’ve been asking myself that for about a week now,” He grinned, then looked down, his smile dropping.
“Draco?” I asked softly, reaching out for his hand. His blue eyes met mine, hesitant. “It’s... you don’t have to... I know you can’t...” Fumbling over my words, I couldn’t find the ones that seemed to fit right.
He reached out, the hand I had seen for weeks on end delicately handle ingredients and potions, just as precisely reached out and tilted my chin up.
“Tell me,” He whispered. “Have I messed up so badly that you can’t forgive me? That you won’t take a chance on a... how did you put it? Heinous misogynistic asshole?” There was a teasing smile on his lips that somehow moved to be inches from mine.
“Who’s quoting song lyrics now?” I mused softly, “And what kind of idiotic question is that?” 
“That’s all I needed to hear,”
His mouth was on mine then, and I couldn't fight him. Not because he was possibly stronger than me—but not by much—but because my will crumbled into dust the second our lips met. So, I kissed him back. His hands memorized my face, the same way mine were tracing his, and, in the brief seconds when his lips were free, he whispered my name.
“I promise I’ll make it up to you,” He breathed out. “I’ll do better,”
"Don't promise me anything," I whispered softly, my hands falling to his shoulders. “Next week you might change your mind... or Pansy might—”
His lips were on mine again, silencing my words and doubts.
“Will you please try to hear what I'm telling you? Will you let me attempt to explain what you mean to me?” His stark eyes pierced mine as he cradled my face. “I am so sorry. I know I’m an asshole, and I know I’ve fucked up—” I started to protest but his thumb brushed over my lips, keeping them closed “—I have. And for a while I thought it was because I fell for you, but I see now is that it was because I didn’t fall for you sooner,”
“Sap,” I mumbled against his thumb, fighting the urge to roll my eyes.
His hands fell and I drew him into a hug. He held me close and for a moment, I just let him hold me. No fears, no doubts, no malicious thoughts, no blood status, no magic. Just two teens and something that might be love.
.................................
“Pansy is actually going to kill me,” I whispered, hesitating outside the Great Hall doors.
“Not while I have a say in the matter,” Draco pressed a soft kiss to the top of my head. “And besides... what’s the worst thing that could happen?”
I walked into the Great Hall, hand in hand with Draco. There was the clatter of dropped dishes and silverware and a collective gasp that fell into a hushed silence. Hundreds of eyes were on us.
“Well, that could have gone worse...” Draco muttered under his breath and I snorted a laugh, shaking my head, letting him pull me to a nearby table.
Nervous chattered and hushed whispers filled the hall. I guess they had good reason though. Draco and I had both tamed the other shrew.
.
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For the ship game: prime numbers for Lupin x Jigen!
HERE YOU GO GHOST, THIS WAS FIVE PAGES IN A GOOGLE DOC AND TOOK ME SEVERAL HOURS
Under a cut, allegedly, though mobile has been known to just IGNORE THAT. Sorry in advance if this gets goofed for anyone.
2) Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, in any place?
Lupin, obviously (and canonically). Just the horniest man you ever did see. Jigen knows what he wants and when he wants it, but he has difficulty keeping up with Don Juan Triumphant over there. Lupin is also far less picky about locations and times than Jigen is. Jigen still has a FEW standards, thank you, and also a stronger sense of self-preservation. Lupin sometimes tries to start shit in public or during a heist and Jigen is like “I REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATE THE SENTIMENT BUT CAN WE NOT.” The closest to public anything Jigen will put up with is bar bathroom/back-alley hookups, and he doesn’t really tend to do that with Lupin or Goemon since they have secondary locations far more suited to such activity (or at least the damn Fiat, if nothing else). That said, Jigen is a spiteful bastard and gets a huge kick out of riling Lupin up over the walkie-talkie during jobs. He is more than happy to get jumped by his boss after they make it out and secure the loot.
3) Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time?
Honestly, while I can totally see Lupin and Jigen doing this with their other partners, I have a harder time imagining the two of them doing this together and I’m not sure why. I feel like these two on their own both like the privacy bathing gives them, whether it’s to clean wounds or decompress from a job.
On the occasions when they do bathe together, I feel like it’s an unspoken kind of thing, where the other person quietly slips in the tub/shower with them and they just don’t bother protesting. I think Lupin is more likely to join Jigen in his bathing, but if Jigen is sleepy enough or lonely enough he might do the same. There is a lot of mutual appreciation of scars. They’ve definitely smoked in the tub before (Intricate Rituals™). Lupin is probably more likely to get handsy, because Lupin, but two can play that game if Jigen is feeling it, and also Jigen gives Lupin a run for his money in the staring department. No hat to hide behind now.
Lupin has also 100% done the whole “Hey Jigen, do you know if—stop screaming, it’s me—do you know if we have any more instant dashi? Goemon’s gonna slice up the sofa if I ruin soba night again.”
5) Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight?
Jigen, but to be fair, he canonically sleeps on the couch most nights (possibly to keep an eye on the door, possibly because he knows that place, at least, is always “acceptable” for him to occupy). It’s an odd night if you don’t see Jigen out there with a glass and a bottle of scotch and an old movie on TV. The main difference is that if he and Lupin have been fighting, he won’t bother with the formality of a glass and the TV will be playing far louder or not at all.
7) [A] Who said “I love you” first? And [B] who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”?
I hate to take the coward’s way out here, but I think the answers are A) either one - depends on the headcanon/fic/version of the characters I’m feeling that day, and B) both.
For A, they’re both the sort of people to show their love—true love/affection, not just flirtation/infatuation, LUPIN—in action, not words. Lupin is a man of many words to a fault, generous with his verbal and physical affection, so Lupin has to find a way to make sure Jigen knows he means it and how he means it. He may rightly fear that Jigen won’t believe him (or else believe him but take it platonically) if he says “I love you” to his face, so first he’ll show him through every little action he can. Jigen is a man of few words to a fault, so saying personal stuff like that out loud is both a last resort and the point of no return. Getting him to say it at all, unambiguously, and while sober is like pulling teeth. Once one of them finally spits it out, though, I think the other is quick to reciprocate (again, if they manage to say it clearly and under good circumstances and not ambiguously/while drunk or wounded/etc. They’re both idiots and selective cowards so this is a big if). The mutual relief is palpable and immediately followed by sex, because they’re both (horny) idiots and selective cowards who do not want to talk about Emotions and Personal Things any more than strictly necessary.
For B, ohhhh man, if it isn’t that same emotional avoidance coming to bite them in the asses! Looks like talking about deep emotions is strictly necessary after all! You know it’s a Big Important Argument for them if this is what it comes to. This is going to tie in somewhat to the answers for 11, 17, and 23, so stay tuned. “Because I love you” coming from either of them should give the other pause, but if they are angry enough, they’re both quite likely to storm off after that declaration anyway. They’ll come back and have a real discussion later, but the shock or frustration of that arresting declaration dropped in the middle of an argument is something neither of them are great at dealing with. Hearing that from Jigen might be enough to stop Lupin in his tracks, but Lupin might also be so dead-set on something that he’ll steamroll right over it even if he knows he’ll regret it later. Hearing that from Lupin probably only makes Jigen angrier because of his awful self-esteem (see answers 11 and 23), and even if he’s been working on that, his instinct will be to snarl “Yeah, right” and storm out the door. I like to think that one day they are able to get to the heart of the argument sooner (because this is almost always it) and work on the behaviors that worry the other so much, but alas, they are a mess.
11) Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?
Once again, either of them depending on the day.
As you mentioned in your JiGoe post, Jigen says it partly because he thinks it’s funny (“You have a crush on me, Boss? Fuckin’ embarrassing”) but also because he’s fishing for validation. His self-esteem/confidence in anything outside his shooting skills is shit and he still can’t quite believe that Lupin isn’t lying/he hasn’t conned Lupin into something. This is rather overestimating his conning skills and underestimating his many good qualities, but, well, genuine, lasting affection is kinda new for him. Much to Jigen’s annoyance, Lupin figures out exactly what Jigen’s up to after the first few times and answers him seriously (and positively) instead of continuing the “joke”. Lupin loses patience for this particular tactic over time but I like to think that Jigen finally begins believing in the affection, too, so it comes up less and less and one day Jigen might actually play the quip straight without the self-deprecation. Ideally he would just take the damn compliment, but it’s LupJig and banter is one of their love languages.
When Lupin says it, he typically is playing the quip straight and fondly giving Jigen shit for showing an Emotion and motherFUCKER I just realized Jigen could probably be considered a tsundere. I hate this. ANYWAY. Jigen then immediately snarks back that yes, Lupin, considering we’ve been travelling the world together and actively fucking for X years, it’d be damn awkward if I didn’t by now.
13) Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer?
Lupin absolutely initiates duets, or rather, he tries to; whether or not Jigen actually chimes in is another matter entirely. Lupin is also the better singer by far (when he’s sober). He loves singing along to pop and rock in the car (“This is the reason God invented America!”).
Much as it would please me personally to give Jigen a smooth operatic baritone, there’s no way in hell he sounds good after smoking a pack a day for twenty-something years. I think Jigen can carry a tune and he’s a decent hummer and whistler, but his singing voice isn’t spectacular.
Lupin occasionally succeeds in getting Jigen to join him in car karaoke, though as in all things, Lupin is much louder and more impassioned. Jigen frequently hums along under his breath, though, and Lupin loves hearing Jigen’s a cappella renditions of classical music (complete with hand motions).
When Queen starts becoming popular, car singalongs become much more involved because it’s MY silly headcanon and You Are Not Immune To Queen. Jigen cried the first time he heard “Bohemian Rhapsody” and he will kill Lupin if he ever tells Goemon or, God forbid, Fujiko. When the four of them are in the car it’s a full-on Wayne’s World headbanging party. (Pops is the drunk guy they pick up along the way. Also, seeing Payless Shoe Source in this clip dealt me psychic damage.)
Lupin and Jigen (and Goemon) are the living embodiment of the drunk friends singing “Sweet Caroline” post, and Jigen is specifically this version of “Sweet Caroline”.
17) Who is more protective?
THAT IS THE QUESTION, HUH, GHOST? Jigen’s job and, to a certain degree, raison d’être is protecting Lupin, but (to cheat slightly and quote your own DM to me), if you think Lupin won’t raze everything to the ground to keep Jigen (and the others) safe, you don’t know him at all. They are this meme to the deepest of faults. They are both so desperately afraid of losing what they have (and in Lupin’s case, this is tinged with a bonus, even more concerning “what is his”) that they will go full self-sacrificing, scorched-earth policy. This is, in fact, my favorite reason for Lupin to do the worst thing he does: fake his own death to protect his partners. Lupin never stops to think that maybe, JUST MAYBE, he should trust his partners to fake grief and keep the secret long enough for whoever’s on their tail to give up or let their guard slip. Lupin is willing to hurt them in an effort to protect them, so in that way, I suppose Lupin is the “most” “protective”. Jigen’s self-abasement to the point of unhesitating and perhaps even hasty sacrifice is painful, too, but Jigen would never dare go to the same level of deception (except in Goodbye, Partner, apparently? But 1) I haven’t watched it yet and 2) while awful, I still feel like fake betrayal pales in comparison to very convincingly (AND MAYBE REPEATEDLY) faked death).
19) Who drives and who has the window seat?
They split driving duties, but Lupin genuinely loves driving and Jigen is more than happy to prop his feet on the Fiat’s dashboard and smoke or sleep the hours away.
23) Who thinks they are not good enough for the other’s love? and who’s more afraid of losing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry?
HERE WE GO AGAIN!!! I think the answer to all of these is ultimately Jigen, but that’s not to say Lupin doesn’t share the exact same worries.
Jigen has a very difficult time believing that his partners’ love is genuine, and since Lupin is the one he knew first, that’s where it first manifests. Jigen has had very, very few good romantic connections in his life (if any). He doesn’t know what Lupin could possibly see in an older, prickly hired killer with a drinking problem and a head full of demons. He’s willing to believe that Lupin keeps him around for his skills, for protection, and for sex, sure, but anything past that? Doubtful. This ties into the other two parts of the question: Jigen is afraid that if he fails in his sharpshooting or his protection, he will be cut out of the gang, or worse, Lupin will end up dead because Jigen slipped up. As mentioned in question 17, Jigen cannot bear to lose Lupin and he would never forgive himself if he believed it was somehow his fault. Accordingly, Jigen takes “failure” that exceeds his usual margin of error very seriously in the early days. Later, he is better about this, but the worst-case scenario still stands.
Lupin, on the other hand, has had plenty of romantic connections, some good, some bad, though it is perhaps telling that Fujiko is his longest romantic relationship other than Jigen. He is afraid that if he doesn’t put on the world’s greatest show at all times, no one will give a rat’s ass about some scrawny grandson of an old French thief (or the perhaps unwanted/disliked son of a ruthless crime lord, because I love that fanon for Lupin the Second). He must live up to and indeed surpass the previous Lupins, he must shower his partners in money and adventure, he must always, always come out on top no matter how south the plan goes, or else what is the point of him? It takes time for him to turn his persona off for more than a few seconds, to let the quieter, sometimes contemplative side that slips through the cracks come to rest out in the open. Years down the road, Jigen finally gets up the courage and the words to tell Lupin that he would love him no matter what he did or where he went, even if that was nothing and nowhere. And again, see question 17 re: losing Jigen.
29) Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires?
Lupin is by far the most guilty of this. He’s constantly pulling dumb shit, whether that be for World-Renowned Gentleman Thief reasons or just He May Be Stupid reasons. Case in point: the tunnel scene in The First, after which Jigen was duly impressed. Fortunately for Lupin, Lady Luck must be head over heels for him because the bastard keeps surviving, but sometimes even she can’t save him from medical consequences. Jigen bulk-ordered “Stupid Hurts” band-aids specifically for Lupin. Jigen’s bad choices are more likely to literally backfire on him, but Goemon more than makes up for Jigen’s slack in the Crazy Stunt department.
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ddarker-dreams · 4 years ago
Text
In Your Eyes. Yan Izaya x Reader [COMM]
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warnings: izaya orihara counts as a warning if im being honest. dude’s a jerk. word count: 3k.
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7:12 PM. 
This isn’t the time of day that Izaya would normally close his services. Not when most of his clientele operate under the cover of night, crawling out from their day jobs and towards him. Izaya’s second monitor is a testimony to that. Message after message flooding in, notifications going ignored after a brief glance. The inquiries have a wide range. From a businessman wanting to know if the wife in his loveless marriage is cheating on him as he suspects, to the yakuza seeking information on a rival group that has been infringing on their territory. These people, deep as their pockets may be, occupy an insignificant role at the time. 
Izaya’s eyes flicker to the live feed coming in from outside his apartment. One sight in particular catches his attention, his lips quirking into a self-satisfied smirk. He stands from the leather chair behind his desk, stretches, and makes for the kitchenette. There’s a spring in his every step as he walks, fingers running over a variety of untouched teas. Earl grey, matcha, chamomile. Chamomile might be best here, he thinks. Izaya busies himself with boiling the appropriate amount of water. Any second now, he just needs to be patient… 
There’s a tentative knock on his door. 
Izaya already anticipated having a most prized visitor paying him a visit. The door was unlocked in advance, but the excitement in his veins is making it difficult to decide on what approach to use. Calling over to come in, or answering the door himself…? He decides on the latter. Playing the indifferent game is growing tiresome. When he swings the door wide open, Izaya’s greeted by the sight of you. You must not have been expecting such a swift response, as a cute gasp leaves your lips. Ah, how endearing a sight.
Not one to stand in silence for long, he extends an enthusiastic greeting. “Ah, [First]-chan, what a lovely surprise. Come in, come in.” 
You do as he instructs, an uncertain smile on your face. He notes how you scrutinize your surroundings. Eyes shifting to every wall, your posture remaining stiff as you remain focused on nothing in particular. After a moment of deliberation, your attention returns to him, and you bow your head.
“I hope I’m not intruding,” you let out a strained laugh, fixating on the soles of your shoes. “I’m sure you must be really busy, but, uh… I had some stuff I wanted to discuss. With you, that is.” 
“You’re in luck then, as I’m not doing anything at the moment,” Izaya pauses at the high pitched sound that signifies his water is done boiling. From how easily startled you are by the noise, he almost wants to tease you. Not yet, he decides. There’ll be time for that later. “Would you like some tea?” You nod your head. “If it isn’t any trouble.” 
He takes this time to recall the cryptic text message you sent him earlier. How much self restraint it took not to respond -- for the greater good, he reminds himself -- the contents catching his interest. You’ve been remaining purposefully vague. Is it to tantalize him? Keep him in the dark for some unknown reason? How interesting, the myriad of possibilities you bring to the table! Izaya’s own theories are plentiful. Hearing it from you beats anything his own imagination could concoct. It was a gamble that you’d actually come by today since he never responded, a test to see just how important this discussion is to you. 
It must be vital if you took the train from Ikebukuro to Shinjuku to get here, as he’s aware you have classes tomorrow morning. The day after that is clear of any university activities if memory serves. This further proves the point to Izaya that whatever it is on your mind must be taking high priority. How his heart flutters at the thought, anticipation rising as he whips together the tea. Humans once again exercise their adaptability, moving along in new directions, with just a tiny push from him. 
When he returns, cups of steaming tea in hand, you’ve already made yourself comfortable on his couch. Your legs crossed, hands clasping together on top of your lap. Izaya’s oncoming set up footsteps must not have been enough to alert you to his presence, so he clears his throat. Just like you did before, you startle, jumping in place. Izaya tuts at your reaction.
“It’s not good to keep zoning out like this, [First]-chan. What if you trip and hurt yourself on the way home? Now, I can’t be having that.” He teases while handing you your teacup. You wear a sheepish smile on your face, cheeks turning a rosy hue from his teasing. This might be the first time he’s ever seen you this out of it. Upon closer inspection, there are bags underneath your eyes, and your overall reaction time is sluggish. Hm…
Izaya takes a set beside you, likely closer than he needs to be, but you never protest. A loud sigh leaves your lips as you sink into his couch. “I sent you a text earlier, but I don’t think you ever saw it.” 
He nods his head in confirmation. The chamomile seems to be working its wonders already, your shoulders slumping down further. Easing you up in his presence has never been a simple task. 
“I’ve been thinking a lot recently,” you take another sip, wincing at how the hot liquid burns as it travels down your throat, “What I realized is that, maybe I do rely on others too much. When Miki went missing earlier this year, you said something similar, didn’t you? That there was a lot I couldn’t do. At the time, I didn’t want to believe you. I still don’t know if I do. So that’s why I wanted to ask if you still think that of me.” 
So that’s what is haunting your mind? A budding identity crisis? He wasn’t expecting something as ordinary as this, feeling almost taken aback that you’d come to him on the topic. Maybe it’s hypocritical of him to think that way. He often finds himself thinking back to the first time you showed up at his office, replaying your words and expressions in his mind like a projector. It’s unlike Izaya Orihara to be a sentimental person, yet he recalls your first meeting with immense fondness. 
- - -
Namie had almost dismissed you. She informed Izaya that there was no practical way you could afford these services, and that taking your appointment would be a waste of time for them both. A standard broke college student isn’t worth all the effort. And on a regular day, he would’ve been inclined to agree. Maybe it had been the boredom, as nothing of interest was brewing in Ikebukuro at the time. Whatever the reason, in retrospect, he’s grateful for the chance encounter. 
“A missing person’s case?” Izaya glances down at the coffee table, where you’ve laid out numerous personal pictures. All featuring the same girl -- Yamato Miki -- who you’ve come here today to seek help for. The job feels familiar, while simultaneously being unlike anything he’s been asked for at the same time. Information for the whereabouts of unsavory folk isn’t a rare request. This falls into a different category. You’re not asking out of ill intent, or he would’ve picked up on that by now. You weren’t lying when you said you were worried about the wellbeing of your friend. 
His eyes return to you shifting in your seat. “I’m curious. Why not go to the police about this instead of me?” 
From how your nostrils flare, he can piece it together before you even verbalize a response. This is the first question of his to earn such a blatant reaction. Everything prior, you had responded to the best of your ability, trying to keep your emotions in check. You steady yourself with a deep breath.
“I’d gone plenty of times, and none of them seemed to care in the slightest! Miki… she has a bit of a record, you see. Nothing serious, she wouldn’t ever hurt anyone, just stuff haunting her from her teenage years,” your gaze lowers, fists clenching by your side. “Since she used to run away from home a lot, they think it’s something like that.”
Izaya sees the pieces of this puzzle falling into place. It’s been about ten minutes since you came in, explaining your story, and his interest is starting to wane. There’s nothing that sticks out to him as unique. Maybe giving you the time of day was a mistake after all, like Namie suggested. Still, the question remains, why go to him specifically? You, a seemingly upstanding citizen, must surely have better options. 
He’ll entertain this charade a tad longer. It’s not like he has anything better to do.
“It’s not unreasonable to think that,” Izaya can’t help but agree with what the police had told you. The change in your demeanor is subtle, former timidity melting away. Greedy as it might be, he wants to see more of this unsightly side of you. So he continues prodding without relent. “People with troubled pasts such as your friend have next to impossible odds to overcome.” 
Your jaw’s clenching, he can see the imprints of how hard your fingernails dig into the palm of your hands. It’s simple to play someone like you to his own tune, he muses. Izaya just about had his fill of this. Maybe he’ll put a last nail in the coffin for good measure. Will you curse at him? Explode and yell? Break down crying? Storm off without a word?
“Chances are, she got in way over her head, and is currently laying dead in an alley somewhere. Or maybe she is somehow alive! In that case, what will you do then? If she couldn’t rely on you, her supposedly closest friend, why do you think that is? She either doesn’t trust you as much as you thought, or was taking advantage of your kindness all along.” Izaya can’t help the smile that curls onto his lips. Now that’s the look of despair he wanted! Being confronted with a fate you knew all along, and yet tried so hard to ignore. Only to fail, to be drawn into a vulnerable position of reality--
“So what?” The tone of your voice is eerily collected. You take a deep breath, glassy eyes refusing to break contact with his own, a sense of resolve keeping you in tact. Izaya tilts his head at this conjecture, as if to invite you to elaborate further. 
“So what if she might be as bad as you say she is? Miki is my friend. I don’t care for some arbitrary method of judging people based only on possibilities. I’ll see the truth for my own eyes and decide myself.” 
Well… to be honest, he was expecting an entirely different reaction. For you to scold someone like him is borderline laughable, yet here you are, doing just that. So why does he find himself even more drawn to you than before? There’s been passion ignited inside you by his own hands, social etiquette thrown to the wayside. Instead of letting this newly lit fire run rampant, you control the flame, refusing to burn as he intended you to. Izaya Orihara has never been one to back down from a challenge. Maybe this isn’t a waste of time after all.
Izaya leans in, resting his temple on his fist. “Pray tell, [First]-chan, what would you do in the event that I’m right? And your precious friend is involved with stuff she shouldn’t be?” 
“I’ll give her a good wakeup slap,” you place a finger to your cheek, considering the proposition. “Then chew her out for making me worry as much as she has. In the end, I want her to know that she can come to me with anything, even the worst she has to offer. That’s what friends are for.”  
A mindset like this is idealistic to say the least. Optimism has never been a field Izaya has excelled in, as he bases things on concrete reality. Is that even the correct label for your way of thinking, he wonders? You’re not ignoring the possible truth, making excuses for her, or even considering enabling her poor behavior. No, it’s a strikingly unusual approach, that takes far more patience than most people have to offer. The shift in outward demeanor from soft-spoken to this unrivaled confidence backs it up further. 
Izaya wants to know more about you. To peer behind the curtain that is your mind, poking and prodding at everything within reach. Seeing how much you can withstand before falling apart at his hands. It looks like you were wrong Namie, he thinks. This is turning out to be interesting. 
“If that’s the case, I’ll lend you my help.” 
You blink. “Y-you will…? But you just went on a tangent about how my ‘deadbeat’ friend isn’t worth the effort.” 
“What can I say? Your impassioned speech tugged on my heartstrings, [First]-chan,” he coos, a wolfish grin spreading across his face. “Maybe I’m growing soft after all. Alright, now let’s start with you giving me your phone number--” 
“Hold on!” you exclaim, putting up a hand. “I don’t need help from someone like you.”
Now it’s his turn to be thrown off by another person’s words. Maybe a taste of my own medicine, he thinks. 
Here he was, figuring you’d grovel at his feet for help. Now that he’s extending a hand out of what you should perceive as goodwill, you… don’t want it…? There’s no quick, witty response. The cogs in his head are turning, trying to comprehend this bizarre situation, and coming up with nothing satisfactory. He hears what’s most definitely Namie struggling to cover up a laugh in the distance. 
“Were you not just trying to convince me?” Izaya quirks up an eyebrow. That’s how he perceived your earlier lecture, as a way to bring him over to your side. For a rare moment, there’s no condescending lilt in his voice, only a genuine attempt to rationalize your actions. 
You’re already moving on from this loss, picking the scattered pictures up and returning them to your handbag. “Not really. I just didn’t like the thought of you looking down on someone without really knowing anything about them.” 
This time, Namie isn’t capable of muffling her laughter. Izaya sighs as he leans back into his couch. How troublesome you’re proving yourself to be. Do you not realize that a few phone calls from his behalf would be enough to ruin you for the rest of your life? Or maybe you do realize, and don’t care either way. Whatever the case, he’s not letting this go. It’s not everyday someone manages to leave him at a loss for words. 
“So it’s back to the police then, hm?” 
You shake your head at his guess, frowning. “I’ll just figure it out on my own. Thank you for your time, Orihara-san.” 
Now you’re standing to leave. Turning your back to him, you make for the door, leaving Izaya to try and piece together what’s happening to him. Izaya follows after you, intent on changing your mind. Anything to keep you close so he can continue observing. 
“What exactly are you planning on doing? It sounded to me like you had no leads or connections. I’m not sure how familiar you are with investigation work, [First]-chan, but you’re not off to a very good start.” Izaya calls over, successfully getting you to stop in place. It’s a relief to know he hasn’t lost his touch. You don’t look fully convinced, so he continues on.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you’re going to be helpless all on your own,” Izaya points out, your grimace growing deeper with every word. He’s getting somewhere, he just needs to reel you back in. “We wouldn’t want my earlier premonition to come true.” 
“I guess so,” you agree without enthusiasm, lips pursing. Izaya can’t help but feel satisfied with your compliance. Then you continue walking towards the door. “I need to give it some more thought. I’ll call your secretary this evening.” 
With that, you’re out of sight, the door shutting in his face. Hm. He doesn’t get the feeling you’re acting like this out of spite. No, you’re sticking true to your own convictions, trying to get a feel for how to best work things out. Izaya’s already planning to run multiple checks on you. He has a growing curiosity for knowledge on you that needs to be quenched. What school you’re going to, where you currently live, if you have a record--
“I can’t say I was expecting that,” Namie comments in her usual monotone. From the skin tightening underneath her eyes, Izaya can tell she’s still fighting back a smile. “Someone turning down your offer to help and lecturing you? I almost feel undeserving of such a wonderful sight.” 
Izaya sighs and runs a hand through his dark hair. “I’m glad you enjoyed your boss being berated so much.” 
“There’s almost nothing better,” she concurs with a nod. “When you’re finished standing there and moping, I already brought her social media up. I figured you’d want to see it after that display.”
This is enough to capture his undivided attention. The boredom from this week is a relic of the past, Izaya’s enthusiasm for human beings returning in full bloom. What a terrifying beast you’ve managed to awaken. You’ll make for a fascinating source of entertainment. He already finds himself looking forward to the next time you cross paths, Izaya confident in his ability to make this happen. He excels at interrupting the flow of people’s lives unprompted. 
- - -
The rest is history, so they say. 
Izaya’s whittled you down this far, creating a codependency that pleases him, a result of hard work on his behalf. You stare at him with doe-like eyes. Vulnerable eyes. Waiting with bated breath to see if he’ll confirm or deny your deepest concerns. 
He wraps an arm around your slouching shoulder. "Now that you have me, what you are or aren’t capable of on your own doesn’t matter anymore. Isn’t that right, [First]-chan?” 
“I... I guess it might be.” 
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handelplayssims · 1 year ago
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Autumn woke up at 3:30 and pissed. She is hot-headed. She is a Good Sim, but also Hot-headed. So she wants to rile someone up. That someone dropped by as she was trying to set fire to some dirty leaves. After that, and kicking the trash can, she wants to volunteer. Let’s head on out then! Got a pop up of trying to return a lost wallet...which failed miserably as she instead got accused of stealing it. Welp. Freddie is awake and wanting to purchase a dishwasher. Man, this house has lots of trinkets and stuff. Bills are going to be expensive. Next is to dance to stereo music but that’s apart of his aspiration. Which is...introducing himself to others and having friends. ...to the neighbors Dang, Curtis Koeing is a notable newcomer so I can’t introduce myself to him. But I can at least talk to Supriya Delgato! ...okay I’m going to return home to try to repeal the We Wear Bags. Just a ridiculous NAP in general. The Delgato family pets all wore hats though, so I find that funny.
Bills arrived. OYE! 18 thousand! ...I’m going to cheat this household the money for these bills. They are rich! ...just not immediately so. (Yes this is me not wanting to move them out) Anyway, NAP repealing is going well! Plenty of signatures from around the food stall. And some folks around the home. Autumn returned home and exams went...not great. Alas. Well, we just moved in so eh. All repeal signatures got! Huzzah for active streets!
So onto Freddie’s aspiration, we’ve invited Mitchell Kalani to hang out. After a few more socials, we gained his friendship! Meanwhile, Autumn wants to beat someone in a game and I bought a video game console for her! Let’s go and win a party game against Freddie...and success! Time for her influncing job to start up. It’s time to...make a lifestyle review. With that you just need to click on an object around a home and make a review of it. Made one of the gym equipment. I should get the video editing thing from Get Famous. That’d pair well with this job. Autumn’s going to bed and Freddie is going to dance! ...and then go to bed. Nothing of note on Neighborhood Watch.
Now is the time to mention how strong Social Bunny is for making friends. Just by reacting to messages people post, I actually managed to get Zoe up to being a friend and getting Freddie past his first stage of his aspiration. That being said, I still want to befriend J Huntington for him. And he wants to chat about his stuff so I’ll invite him over. Autumn wants to rile someone up and then make someone happy. Conflicting wants there! Riled up and now we’ll head on over to our neighbors house to befriend Pierce. Easily done with a few socials and chatting a little. Friend made! Time to make another! We’ve got two guy friends so lets make a gal friend. Time to recall who I spotted at school… lets go for Olivia Kim-Lewis! Found out she’s a goofball and gained an adoring sentiment somehow with our chatter. Let’s see, that’s enough teen befriending for now. Let’s go home and check back in on Freddie.
Autumn got a text for prom prep but alas, I misclicked. Ah well. Freddie wants to buy an object worth a 1000 or have a drink at the club. To the club! (Also what the heck would I purchase? This house is too furnished!) School’s custodian Tai Lum is now a mixologist. Welp. And hey! The food stall dude I asked for a vote from is here! Ian Pearson. He’s squeemish, lazy and as I just found out since I flirted with him, unflirty. Welp. Ooh, and I chatted with Tai, since he’s also a snob and giving that snob buff. To the dance floor and- there’s more bros and snobs around! First being Belle Brandt, that lady with my first household on this blog! Second being the bro named Augustus Copur, a professor at Britechester. Oh evidently he’s unemployed now. Alas!
Got prom notification and eh, don’t feel like it. Let’s continue socalizing and befriending folks with Freddie! You had the morning Autumn, now let’s have Freddie have some fun. Whim now is to bro hug a bro and despite being surrounded by bros, he only knows of one. To the Roomies! To bro hug Mitchell! Which we have done so! And found out that he is Outgoing as well. Anyway, might as well offer a massage to someone since that’s his way of money making. J Huntington! You’ll do! Now let’s head home.
Hmm, Autumn still has the gain followers on social bunny and make someone happy. I think, it’s time to bust out the media production and video edit! Herbalism, Kids, Mixology and Dazed Vlogs are trending. So uh, let’s work on mixology shall we? Mixology video recorded, now time to check:
Neighborhood Watch!
Forgotten Hollow: The Iosua household recently moved out.
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mrs-nate-humphrey · 4 years ago
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I am curious: what are your favorite scenes from your main ships (date, dair, derena...)?
scenes involving milo don't count, sorry!
for me, it's really not just scenes, but body language & just in general, how they are with each other, you know? dan and serena grin at each other and hug SO much, you can tell that being around each other in s1 made them both so happy, and even after that glow fades the way they look for comfort in each other... top level stuff. the way blair looks at dan... we never see her as radiant at any other point. she was not looking at anyone else like this. and gosh, dan and nate. they're both so comfortable around each other that there's absolutely nothing weird about like. discussing that one ex girlfriend whom they both share AND both were in love with. there is literally no other duo who trusts/enjoys each other's company so much that they're comfortable in a love triangle. (probably because they're more in love with each other than with the girl, but that is not the point. or is it?)
anyway, more specific answers. under the cut. this is one of the longest answers i've ever written on this blog possibly but you KNEW that would happen when you sent this ask, didn't you? (affectionate)
derena: i tagged one of my ds reblogs as 'the grumpy one is soft for the sunshine one' and like. look at them! this hug from 1x10 kills me in the best way. they are both the literal embodiment of :D when they see each other! i love 1x10 as a whole moment, their entire thing at cotillion is so sweet and they're both so happy. the fact that he is talking about his chemistry teacher during this kiss in 1x07. that bit at the end of 1x05 when they talk about their siblings (being there for their sibling because of fallible parents being a derena parallel makes me simultaneously really sad and really soft, tbh). 1x05 gives me SO MUCH SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT but the way they walk off together arms around each other does something to me - these are two people who are still getting to know each other but who really like what they see, and who trust each other and. are just having a good time together! back when derena was my OTP, the 1x11 "your story's about me?" was absolutely a fave, too, and i still adore it, albeit in a different, more nostalgic way. i like a dan who writes cute stories about serena. no empty shell sabrina van skoneker bullshit. she is so much like you, daniel! you'd be shattered if she did this to you. don't do this to her. tbh, most derena moments from s1 are just A+ romance. the bit in 2x02 in the jitney is so funny, they're SO bad at being exes. the bit in... 3x03 i think?? i don't remember... on the contrary. when they're talking about dan's fling w/ georgina and serena's relationship with carter, the ease with which they talk and how happy/supportive they are of each other's new relationships... yeah. love to see it.
i also really like any instance of them having honest/open conversations. 1x13, talking about how serena is concerned about blair. 1x08, serena talking to dan about feeling jealous of vanessa. this bit from the touch of eva or whatever that episode is. 4x04 i think. this is the conversation everyone is trying to get dan to have and he's avoiding EVERYONE else. derena interactions in 3x21 (can't find a gif right now) - the fact that dan is with serena when her dad abandons them, the fact that he goes all the way there with her. 2x07, "i'm really glad you're nate's friend. he really needs someone like you right now" (though i'm cheating, that's technically a d/n moment too klhdflkgf). there's a bit in s4 where he's advising her against having an affair w/ colin, i don't remember the ep number, but the way he takes her side so easily and naturally and puts due blame/responsibility solely on her professor... yeah. 4x10 i think this ep is?? idk. but like my tags say, im sentimental about this moment because while what dan was doing was irresponsible, sneaking her out of the ostroff, he was the only person in this episode who was actually talking to her and listening to her and taking her seriously. nobody else was doing that!!
i probably have more moments i'm not remembering, but we're only 1/3 into this answer and LOOK AT THE WORDS, good lord, i'm sorry.
dair: my favourite dair episode is hands down despicable b (5x21) which i have heard is an uncommon answer. i just love the conflict resolution of it all, okay!!! 1x04 & 2x08 are like. standard answers any dair shipper will give, and i'm no different. i love dan being able to give blair advice and blair actually taking his advice even though they're not friends yet!!! be right back, yelling at the intimacy of it all!! 5x16, with their getting together (this little kiss and dan being so startled by it), blair admitting a flaw she genuinely does have and dan saying it's not awful because it's her, which is just. romance at its finest. those vows, good lord. 5x18.... they're having fun! blair showing up at the loft in lingerie for dan... the delight on her face.... (i know this moment blows up in their face but when she's there she looks so happy and proud of herself and this was like THE moment when i was like. oh. dair is really the heart of this garbage show huh).
i think for me, the thing that really sells dan & blair together is the serena of it all. both of them love serena more fiercely than anyone else, and that is what brings them together. (fwiw i definitely think nate loved serena this much and this deeply, too; the writers just wanted to pop the serenate balloon, which even i think was extremely unnecessary and ooc.) but (& i have so much meta about this) their relationship grows beyond serena. their entire s4 arc is SO good. i love how comfortable around each other they are, in such an adult way, in the sense of like. they both bring so much stability to each other? morgan tagged this edit "the marrieds" and like. yeah. b offers to help him shave. they're having breakfast & reading the paper together.
all the love declarations we got that weren't a simple 'i love you.' be your charming wonderful self (how could she not love you/ tell me what would make you happy, dan) i told chuck he doesn't have my heart anymore (you spent your life earning the keys to set you free when you were free all along!!!!) dan's pep talk to blair in 5x21 (already linked a gifset earlier, here's another one if you want i guess). there's definitely more... but honestly, the way the dair arc was executed was so good - while i do have my complaints, i also think keeping those aside, it was SO close to perfect. i love dan & blair's banter and gradually becoming closer and closer and closer. it felt very organic and real and GOSH. the way penn & leighton looked at each other while playing dan and blair...... it's just SO MUCH.
date: this is the hardest, because it's. *screams*. maybe you saw me losing my mind over those 2 seconds of nate handing dan a waffle? i love almost every scene with these two, even the hellish s6 breakup scene. my favourite episode for d/n (& also favourite gg episode in general) is 2x06 - i love the homoerotic subtext of it all. nate pretending to be dan because dan's name is the first name that came to his head. dan flirting w/ nate while tied to that thing, in his underwear. them becoming friends. and 2x07 as a follow-up to that! dan getting nate to live in the loft with the humphreys for a while. i am so soft.
4x09 is a terrible episode in general, especially for serena my beloved, but the d/n moments in that one? off the CHARTS. this weird overly macho flirting, in some ways THE most iconic d/n line. this entire finish each other's sentences nonsense. someone (i think it was ana but im not sure?) compared the energy of those scenes i just linked to the book blairenate love triangle resolution, blairena choosing each other over nate in the books, date choosing each other over serena in the show (if only! RIP.) after the saints & sinners ball, this cute little moment of 'youre the only one who understands me. please tell me they went home together. i mean. how could they not have.
3x07, them watching vampire porn together. a tag i used on ao3 (& also on here, once) is 'nate brings out the himbo in dan'. here is a prime example. 'is she levitating?' i don't fucking know, dan, what do you think?? (i was telling my partner that that's what i love abt dair vs date. around blair dan is an intellectual, a librarian, an art historian, a museum curator. around nate it's like dan is competing to be #1 himbo on the show. can my girlfriend actually fly? i don't know, dan. i can't believe you're seriously asking such a question.)
3x12 pep talk. (sorry about the shitty quality!) essentially nate telling dan that he (dan) is hot and that he shouldn't talk himself down so much.
dan making nate gay in his book. you know. his book from which blair found out he was in love with her. nads (who i will not tag in this billion word long gushy meta, because i value her sanity) once called inside "wish fulfilment' and. i mean. yeah
nate checking dan out at the derena wedding continues to be hilarious. hilarious in the same way as dan sexually fantasising about nate. canon really went 'let's give ivy some special easter eggs' and i appreciate them a lot!
i love the way they are around each other - so quietly attuned to each other. i showed my sister my date!husbands gifset, and she was like. yeah they're so married. and it's just stuff like how dan looks for nate over his shoulder, it's not even an active action, it's as easy and natural and intuitive as breathing, checking to see if nate is still there.
oh, that wasn't as hard as it could've been! okay. cool. im SURE there's more things i could scream about, because it's DN, the fact that they're non-canon makes me THAT much fiercer about them than dair/derena, to be honest. so many dots to connect!! anyway.
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mariaiscrafting · 4 years ago
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hey! i rmbr reading smth you said about how the streamers tend to think of things as “ppl on twitter being mad,” specifically tubbo, and he was kind of talking about twitter and drama and discussions and stuff on his alt stream today about like 2h20m-ish in? the beginning of the mariokart bit? idk i’ve been thinking about ur post a lot and thought you might find it interesting
Hmm... I've been listening to this for the last few minutes and I have... several opinions lmao.
I overall agree with his sentiments, first of all. That people cannot express a single opinion without the potential of getting eviscerated on Twitter and thus, alienating half their fanbase, is annoying as fuck. If someone just wants to talk about something and is open to debate and argument and listening to other perspectives, there should be no problem. But the way MCYT works is that a huge part of their fanbase is on Twitter, where it is extremely easy for issues to get blown up and warped beyond recognition, essentially defaming the person involved. Two instances I can remember myself: one, there's Blaustoise who, as far as I can tell, is not a half-bad guy and hasn't expressed any controversial opinions before. But after he expressed that he believed Dream cheated that one, singular time, he got dragged through the mud on mcyttwt, got himself on Trending, and by the time the whole thing was said and done, you know what people were saying when paraphrasing him? "Blaustoise cornered Dream on a podcast and accused him of cheating," which was so far from the truth, and kinda fucked the guy over, audience wise. Second, there's Eret. The opinion that Eret expressed was that sometimes, prepubescent children might not know if they're ace or not. This one, single opinion was also warped and thrown to the wolves, and after getting him trending and everything, Eret antis to this day still say "Eret is aphobic." Twitter is a prime platform for the worst game of Telephone on the planet, and unfortunately, it houses the majority of the MCYT fandom. So yeah, it makes sense Tubbo would be frustrated with the inability for anyone in his streaming circle to so much as utter an opinion without being scared of getting fucked over.
Now, what I disagree with Tubbo on is... a variety of small things. First of all, I don't think he understands that where Twitter mobs come from is usually genuine frustration at oppression and ignorance, and it's annoying how streamers tend to forget that and only address the "I made part of my audience upset" side of discourse. Second of all, I don't think Tubbo realizes how much privilege he has, and just how little he is likely to be subject to any such Twitter mob if he actually had a full-on stream where he didn't simply voice throwaway opinions, but rather, listened to chat, spoke to different people, and/or researched whatever he was talking about. He's a white, cishet guy with a huge audience. He is not going to be held to the same standards as any other creator because people are harsher with their judgement when it comes to creators that don't fit that demographic, and his audience will always fall back on him to defend him. His concern is understandable, but mostly unnecessary lmfao. And third of all, I think he misunderstands why his Chat tells him to move on from things. He seems to take it as them getting offended by him bringing up certain topics, but really, they're just trying to shepherd him back to the game he's playing so he can avoid the Twitter mob lmao.
Several things I think could be done, on the part of creators, to make it easier and more okay for them to voice whatever opinions they like, without getting read to filth. First is to actually call out their audience for the practice of organizedly attacking other creators, taking quotes and paraphrases out of context, and warping minor opinions into huge issues where they should not exist. Yes, I'm calling out the likes of Dream here, which have given Twitter stans a massive ego and sense that they can do no wrong, when that is far from the truth. Second, they can set up and organize streams where they have all those necessary components to make sure they can be as open, inclusive, and educated as possible when talking about controversial things, instead of just offhandedly voicing their opinions on-stream. Because the reality is that if you are creating content in any other sense - on a podcast, news broadcast, YouTube video essay - that has to do with something heavy or controversial, you should be putting in that effort because your content goes out to a huge platform. Just because streaming is more casual does not mean you will not reap the repercussions for not tackling such subjects with the same amount of preparation and care. Third of all, stop fucking glorifying Twitter. By being so obsessed with Twitter, CCs are fueling their fandoms on that platform. Seriously, the fact that Twitter is essentially the expected place to make issues known, get topics trending, and directly interact with CCs, is what makes it such a cesspool.
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