#and the thing abt getting hit wrong is in reference to him just like. blacking out for a bit in the tracis fight lol?? u ok bud????

[zenoiredottore]

HOYOFAM headcannons

ZZZ

Before their release they were being carried around in a baby basket, while they were floating around in this glass ball [cuz obvs they don’t have parents and I like to think of them as being grown in labs]

When zzz was born/released everyone was waiting patiently, watching as the glass was about to break

Their birth was probably also live streamed yk cuz they were a new addition to the hoyofam

First words were definitely mother fucker

A bit disobedient towards everyone during the toddler years

Genshin was the one who primarily took care of them before and after birth

Literally attached to the hip to genshin

Would be taken on business meetings, character designing, and just other stuff lolol

The fam would fight on who gets to take them for the day when they were still in the glass ball

But once they were born and especially after they started talking no one wanted to babysit

Spends most time with genshin but prefers to be with hsr

TOT

Born and developed almost as the same time as genshin, which technically makes them twins kinda

Genshin was developed for longer, but tot got released sooner.

But then they needed to be kept in the hydrophonics lab even tho they already got released. [kind of a reference of how tot was released a year earlier in china, a couple months before genshin. Then tot was released internationally like a year later]

I HC tot as a girl, and to be blonde and blue eyes like davis,,, but virtually it doesn’t rly matter cuz these are games and are genderless! Just a hc

Very smart, might be the smartest …?

Has zero combat abilities

Problem solver of the bunch

Debate queen

Hi3 [sorry idk much abt hi3]

Spoilt as hell when she was the only child,,, lowkey disses genshin cuz he stole her spotlight

The golden child, can do no wrong

Claims she’s too old but still has that child-like wonder

A lot more mature now!

Def looks like kiana 100%

RAISED genshin but not rly in like a maternal way more so like master oogway,,,, trained and taught that mf the ways of life and such

Dresses like a grandma at home

Had an embarrassing emo phase that the people online still bring up til this day

Often visits the grave of her predecessors before her, [flyme2themoon, houkai gakuen, gungirlz]

A lesbian

Gossips with tot

Annoys her lil bro genshin while he’s working cuz she kinda feels guilty pushing him away when all he wanted was to hang out with her, and now that he’s this big responsible finance business guy and that he’s no longer the angsty teenager who won’t just stfu

HSR

The funniest

Looks like caelus and stelle

No sense of fashion, same pair of black pants and white tshirt all day…when he’s feeling fashionable he puts on his black jacket T^T

Games on his phone 24/7

The game that is a gamer

A bit dumb cuz he was dropped in his glass ball as an infact

Now makes more money than genshin, and rubs it in his face

Not academically smart but loves solving puzzles

Can RUN

Can’t jump, climb, swim, or fly.

Almost the same height as genshin now [he wears THICK soled shoes]

Embarrassing to be with in public

Autistic

When he gets into a fight he lets his opponent hit him first and when he thinks their done he’ll unleash his full power on them

A surprisingly good dancer

Doesn’t like speaking in front of large crowds

A bit upset that he isn’t the baby of the fam anymore

Can cook but makes the WRONG recipes… [he saw a recipe online for a chocolate-sardines cake and it’s his favorite thing to bake]

Doesn’t want to admit it but he loves his siblings very much

Disses genshin a lot despite having a lot of respect for him [he doesn’t want anyone to know that]

Train and space nerd

Genshin

Hell spawn

Evil

Problem child

Was an angsty teenager

A colorist [deathly allergic to melanin]

As time went on he grew up and became more mature [still evil]

Toxic love

He knows that no matter how hard you run you’ll always find your way back to him one way or another

He’s become a bit jaded over the years

HC appearance as a lookalike of vyn richer but with blue eyes

A man in finance, trust fund, 6’5, blue eyes.

I based their heights on hm gb they have in total and just kinda ruled it out

The most hated game/person obvi

Despite this many people still play his game

Popular but not well liked

The people that hate him worship the group that he walks on [this is mostly me]

Manages all the finances. Pays the bills in time, does everyone’s taxes

Doesn’t really mind that his lil bro is out earning him, it ends up in their same shared bank account anyways…

Best friends with pjr despite their differences

While hi3 is the golden child genshin is more like pillar that holds everything together, despite his relationship with the people around him

He’s very proud of his siblings

Has made a lot of enemies over the years

Occupies himself with work

A bit cold, but kind nontheless

Thankful for hi3 for working hard to earn resources for him, making him the man that he is today and a bit apologetic for being such a pain in the past

In turn he also worked hard for hsr and zzz’s funds

STINGY AS HELL. [GIVE US MORE FREEMOS!]

A convo between hsr and genshin- “you know… you should give more free rewards for your players… it’s really not that hard. Plus you have like, nothing to lose!” says hsr. “Haha. NO.” Genshin says while watching the chaos of the 2nd anniversary. “Let them eat cake.” He says while smiling like a maniac.

Literally all eyes on him during award shows…

So many people hate him, like REALLY hates his guts

Not really nonchalant he just doesn’t care about much stuff

Loves nature and exploring

Literature nerd

Very religious [let’s take this moment and pray to RNGesus]

[her-canine-teeth]

sugar water by flower face - notes

pov jackie is blue, pov shauna is red

My boy plays a game with my heart on the flatline

idk what to say to that other than 'yeah'

He likes to keep me halfway out

out of her life (doesnt tell jackie abt the stuff she writes abt in her journal) and physically kicking her out of the cabin

You know girls like me we’ve got a slow pulse

lol

Hit the trip switch baby I’m all right

she obviously isnt.

My boy’s got a sharp twist no he’s wicked in the heart

theres rlly not all that symbolism here. references jackies 'coming back wrong' and implies how she like wants to turn shauna to cannibalism, to violence

Feeds me sugar water just to keep me alive

orginial note was 'eating her'. sugar water doesnt really do anything, doesnt nourish; just like the ear. though, in contrast to sugar water the ear makes the hunger be more present (makes shauna aware of it, maybe) (note: idk what sugar water is used for and idk the meaning of it in the song bc i didnt google it. but i interpret it as 'ill give you the bare minimum to keep you alive and sweeten it so u dont know or smht)(update i googled it and i was right at least i think so. sugar addicting etc) anyways yeah jackie feeds shauna herself to keep her alive

Saw him in my dreams again

bridge is like synonymous to dreams to me. probably bc its night i think ive said this before.

He’s wiping down the fingerprints

making evidence disappear; jackie disappears (was never there)

Press so hard I float up to the sky

'press so hard' -> pressure here more or less. floating bc 1 laura lee 2 ascension of the soul after death 3 she looks up and i rlly like that

Hanging round like a puppy til you let me in

just jackie looking at shauna basically. waiting for shauna to come outside n get her (let her in. by coming outside shed not only let her into the cabin but back into her life)

Coming home with a black eye begging for you

shed totally beat sb up for jackie. shes wants her, cant have her (tragedy ensues)

You like to treat me like a child, but that’s all right

the maybe i dont want to wear the red dress and uh yeah shauna does end up wearing it; its jackie telling her what to do and shauna eventually relenting (its not alr as we find out but. yk)

I kinda like it when you talk the way you do

she doess

It’s kind of tripping me up, babe I’ve got it bad for you

she does

Laying back sipping sugar water

(the hug)

I’m so weak for the things you do

yeah

Drop to the floor every time I hear your voice

theyre. laying on the ground

Seeing stars on the borderline

jackie is shaunas star<3 also shes rlly far away, unreachable (dead), different than what she really is (shauna-jackie is sharper than jackie-jackie. stars r not dots)

borderline captures like the flashing lights, loud music, what is real? vibe; jackie is not singular here, shes one of many many people that look like her (more or less). the reality (callie) overlaps with imagination (jackie) here.

Sinking through the floor

sorta fit if u see the water as floor yk

you can find the edit here

[night-fallz]

XY’s Muse

Based on this prompt

Like I have stated before, this is my first fanfic. Please let me know what you think of it. Any kind of criticism will be welcome.

uploaded on 01/23/21

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ao3 // Wattpad

previous II next

Chapter 2

XY was staring at the ceiling. A week has already passed. And he still couldn't stop thinking about the day he spent with Marinette. It was the most fun he'd had in a while.

Before the whole Silencer fiasco, his father would not stop pressuring him to produce a new song. So when they met up for dinner and his dad came up with the idea of stealing someone else's music, he couldn’t bring himself to decline.

XY knew it was wrong.

But all he wanted was the chance to finally impress his dad. Bob Roth might not have the best attitude towards him, but he was all XY had left.

Xy already lost his mom. He would not lose his dad too.

At least, that's what he believed. He should've known that his father was just using him for money. According to his dad, money was the most valuable thing in life.

XY scoffed. He should've known better. He should've known that all his father thought of hi-

He felt a buzz in his pocket and his face immediately brightened. Marinette just texted him!

Marinette: what's up?

Marinette: have u been inspired yet?

Marinette gave XY the idea to just sit back and let inspiration hit him. It was a common idea but it was one that most people tend to forget in the long run.

XY: nothing much

XY: and nope.

XY: my dad has been pressuring me to come up with something tho

Marinette: ignore him

Marinette: he's just mad cause he can't get any ladies

The three dots popped up on his screen.

Marinette: OH CRAP I'M LATE

Marinette: TTYL.

XY rolled his eyes and smiled.

They've been texting back and forth these past few days. He's learned so many things about her and vice versa.

It was nice. It's been a while since XY has had a friend.

Maybe she'll be even more, XY couldn’t help but think as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Huh," XY said out loud. "Even more"

And just like that, inspiration for his next song hit him.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Marinette was thinking of a certain blonde-haired, blue-eyed musician when she heard her phone ring.

"Tikki!" she screamed, staring at her phone as if it was Hawkmoth himself.. "He's calling me. XY is calling me."

Tikki sighed and floated next to Marinette, "Maybe you should answer it. It would be pretty rude to keep him waiting."

"Right, right," Marinette answered his call and hoped her voice didn’t sound as squeaky as she thought it did.. "Hey."

"Hey."

There was a moment of awkward silence.

Marinette didn’t know what to do. She glanced at the small goddess.

Tikki rolled her eyes at their awkwardness as she gestured to the phone. Ask him why he called you, she mouthed to Marinette.

Marinette nodded. That was a smart idea. "So," Marinette cleared her throat. "Why did you call me?"

"Right, Uhm." Marinette heard him shuffling around his room. "You know how you've been asking me if I was inspired and stuff?"

Marinette's eyes grew wide and a huge smile took over her face as she started to nod before remembering that he couldn't see her. "Yep." she eagerly said, "Did you find any?"

"Yes!" Marinette could hear the excitement in his voice. "I was actually wondering if you wanted to design the outfits for my music video."

Marinette's eyes looked shocked. "Yes!" she jumped around in excitement before remembering she was still in a call with XY. "Why me though?"

XY’s voice sounded confused.. "What do you mean, why you? You're literally perfect for it. You're talented. Plus, everyone loves your designs."

Marinette’s cheeks resembled a tomato. She has never been more thankful for the fact that he couldn't see her right now.

"Thank you." Marinette managed to mumble. "That really means a lot."

"You're welcome." XY said. Marinette had a feeling he was smiling though. "I have to go and have my dad listen to the demo. But I'll text you later, okay?"

"Yep," Marinette whispered and gave Tikki a cookie. "Good luck. I know that whatever song you came up with is gonna sound good. No matter what he'll say."

Marinette heard a faint "Thanks" from the phone before the call ended.

Marinette screamed into her pillow and looked up and saw Tikki look at her with amusement. “I think I like him.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"So, what do you think?" XY asked as his father finished listening to his song. "Is it bad? Do you think people will like it?"

Bob Roth grinned at his son. "This is a Masterpiece. Where did you find this?" He gestured to the video of XY singing the song, "Who did you steal this from?"

XY's proud smile immediately turned into a scowl. "What do you mean, who did I steal this from?" He yelled at his dad, his blue eyes glaring at him as he grabbed the demo from the table. "I made it. I came up with it myself." XY felt his eyes tearing up. "Something you would actually know if you thought of me as something more than a money-making machine."

How could he? XY thought as he climbed up the stairs. Is it that hard to believe that I could come up with something good?

XY slammed his door shut. "All I wanted was to prove to him that I wasn't a talentless son." XY put his hands on his face. "I just wanted to make him proud."

XY felt a buzz in his pocket and immediately knew that it was Marinette. After all, she’s the only one that ever texts him.

Marinette: how did it go?

Marinette: did he like it?

XY wiped away the tears that were starting to come out of his eyes. He couldn't help but smile. Marinette certainly had an effect on him.

XY: he called it a masterpiece

Marinette: yes! I knew he would like it.

XY: yeah

XY: but then he asked me who i stole it from

Marinette: THAT JERK

Marinette: WTF

Marinette: THAT's SO MESSED UP

Marinette: HOW COULD HE-

Marinette: DO YOU WANT ME TO BEAT HIM UP FOR YOU????

XY laughed at her text messages. He only started to text her and he already felt better.

XY: no, it's fine

XY: i actually yelled at him

Marinette: ...

Marinette: do you feel better?

XY: actually, yep.

XY: he's a really sucky father

Marinette: for some reason, a lot of the blondes i know have a toxic parent

Marinette: it's kinda sad

XY: maybe it's a paris thing

They texted back and forth, XY laughing at the memes Marinette sent.

XY: You're definitely a daughter of Athena

Marinette: ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )

Marinette: is that a percy jackson reference i see

XY: yep

XY: have u read the books?

Marinette: duh

Marinette: you haven't lived til you've read the books

Marinette: sadly, the movies sucked tho

XY: I KNOW

XY: ANNABETH WASN'T EVEN BLONDE

Marinette: EXACTLY!!

Marinette: SJSJSJSJSJSJ

 Marinette: THE MOVIES SCARED ME FOR LIFE

XY: oh yeah

XY: before i forget

XY: what's ur insta?

Marinette: which one

XY scrunched his eyebrows up in confusion.

XY: What do you mean by which one?

Marinette: i have two

Marinette: one as my personal one and the other one for commissions and stuff

XY: ohhh

XY: smart

Marinette: i know ;)

Marinette: my personal one is @Mdupaincheng and the one for my commissions one if @MDCdesigns

XY switched his apps and searched up Marinette's personal instagram. He clicked on the first result that came up.

The profile picture was Marinette in a blue, silky dress that went just above her ankle. There was a slit on her left leg that showed her knee. It was nighttime and Marinette was practically glowing under the city lights. She was staring at something on her right side, with one hand running through her silky black hair which was down for once.

She looked hot.

After XY stopped admiring her profile picture, he finally noticed her follower count.

She had 200,000 followers. 200,000.

It wasn't as high as XY's follower count, that was still quite a lot.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

XY: i didn't know u were insta famous

Marinette: wdym?  

Marinette: which acc

XY: ur personal one

XY: u have over 200k followers

Marinette thought that she read his text wrong. There's no way that Marinette had that many followers. 200,000? There was no way.

Marinette: ur lying

XY: I'm not.

XY: check ur acc

It's been a while since Marinette has logged onto her personal account. The hate she got the last time she's been signed in was too much for her and when Alya told her to log out and just focus on her other account, @MDCdesigns, she couldn't bring herself to argue against her.

Marinette hasn't even thought of that account since that day. So when she logged in and saw that XY wasn't lying, she accidentally dropped her phone in shock.

Tikki looked at Marinette with a questioning look.  

Marinette ignored her kwami and texted the blue-eyes boy back.

Marinette: HOLY SHIT

Marinette: I HAVE 200k FOLLOWERS

Marinette: HOW TF DID THAT HAPPEN

XY: when was the last time you checked ur acc

Marinette: about 3 months ago

Marinette: the media thought i was adrien's gf and his fangirls came at me

Marinette: i got a ton of hate and a friend of mine told me to log out and just focus on my @MDCdesigns acc

Marinette: so i did

Marinette: i haven't thought abt that acc since then

XY: the fangirls were probably just jealous

XY: it's been months so they probably calmed down

XY: I'm looking through the comments rn and so far the latest hate comment you've got was about 2 weeks ago

XY: you've got a bit of a fanbase yk

Marinette: WHAT DO I DO

Marinette: DO I JUST CONTINUE NOT TO POST OR SHOULD I POST SOMETHING ON MY STORY ABT HOW THANKFUL I AM FOR 200k

Marinette: HOW COME NONE OF MY FRIENDS TOLD ME ABT THIS

XY: don't post anything rn

XY: post a picture of yourself and the caption it something that shows ur thankful for the number of followers u received

XY: OH

XY: a few hours before u post the picture, make sure u post on ur story abt how ur back from ur break on social media

XY: that way ppl will understand why u haven't been active

XY: it'll also have ppl prepared for ur post and they'll be waiting for u to post it

XY: that'll give u more engagement and stuff

Marinette: thank u

Marinette: that was really helpful

Marinette: when should i post something?

Marinette: AND I STILL DONT KNOW WHY MY FRIENDS DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABT THIS

XY: u told ur friend that u were taking a break from social media right?

Marinette: yes

XY: then they probably weren't expecting u to post anything so they weren't checking ur insta

XY: u should post something on the weekend

XY: that way ppl wouldn't bother u during school this week

XY: if u want i can help u come up with ideas tomorrow?

Marinette: yes, please!

Marinette: do u wanna come over

Marinette: we can plan it in my room so that ppl won't overhear us

XY: guess I'll see u tomorrow then

XY: just text me the time ur available and I'll be there

Marinette: make sure to wear a disguise tho!

Marinette: we got lucky last time and no tabloids caught us

XY: ur right

XY: we must've been really lucky if no one got a pic of us

XY: but okay

XY: I'll wear my best disguise

XY: goodnight, princess

Marinette blinked a few times, making sure she read the text correctly.

Princess.

Marinette: goodnight ♥

previous II next

This is the first chapter of the story. Please let me know what you think

1,967 words

Tag list:

@iglowinggemma28 @mica-aa @lady-bee-fechin @maskedpainter @snnoww26 @ravenr22 @spiritofchaoticdreams @ravennm84 @heaven428 @finn-cipher @peterxwade24 @aliceofice22 @queenamongthorns @captainmac6

[celestial-ringleader]

pssst here’s a free pass to talk more about your phoenix!gambit au 👀 his design is super cool and i am curious abt what you have figured out so far,,, 🤲

First of all thank you so much ;u;

Okay so to start off with, the basic idea was formed because I was reading over some stuff about the Phoenix Five event that happened a bit ago (and also talks about the Phoenix came up a few times in discord) and I was sort of chilling out and suddenly I got hit with the idea: what if Remy absorbed the Phoenix Force? And then it was all downhill from there.

(Big thanks to @esteicy-blog and @imperiuswrecked for hearing me out on this ajkbkvj)

This is gonna be a long post so I'm putting it under a read more

Design:

So to start with, I'm gonna first go through the outfit design because honestly that's always the fun part for me. I wanted to obviously reference the first Dark Phoenix arc but I also didn't want it to be copy-paste, so in terms of design/over all aesthetic I was taking a lot of inspiration from the OG Dark Phoenix outfit and a bit of Namor's Phoenix look, mostly for the gold detail and the red/black/gold color scheme. And for the outfit I went with for Remy it's sort of a mix of his classic look but also his look in Excalibur. (See below)

I looked at the other Phoenix outfit variants (and apparently there are some Phoenix Gambit designs out there???), but those didn't really inspire me that much?? I wanted him to look more regal while also fucking intimidating, so Phoenix Remy would have armor on while also looking Extra Slutty for good measure (plus some rubies to make him look Expensive).

So then we end up with this: (anatomy is weird here but this was just to get a full-body drawing down, also the coat sadly didn't make it to the drawing since I wanted to show off the gold but he does wear one usually.)

But anyways that's just design stuff and I barely got into the meat of the actual AU.

Overall Story Premise:

So as I was doing research into the Phoenix, I found out that apparently at one point it put itself in some kind of egg in the White Hot room (that's according to the wiki) and that sort of made me start thinking about Remy could've gotten it.

The gist of what I came up with after the last couple of days is that one day the X-Men/Avengers (which I'm not sure who all would be there, but it would definitely have Remy, Pietro, and Jean) are called to do some retrieval mission by investigating a crashed spaceship where they need to find an artifact for the Shi'ar. They aren't told exactly what it is nor what it looks like, only that it's important they get it and they will "know it when they see it".

To not make this post too long and spoil what I might write, basically they go to find it and split off. Remy finds himself in the hull of the ship (which has all the treasure in it so of course he starts looting) when he comes across what looks like a fancy egg-shaped jewel, and aside from feeling warm there's nothing really menacing about it. Remy reports in that he found a weird thing, but he doesn't think it's what they're looking for. Jean tells him to leave it since they shouldn't steal from the Shi'ar...which only makes Remy want it more.

(Here's a visual of what happens basically:)

Remy in fact doesn't leave it and just shoves it in his bag while he finds his way back to the team, but on the way there the wreckage caves in more around him and leaves him trapped. And since there's no other way to escape, he uses the egg (which makes him sad because he really did wanna keep it) but the second he charges it up, he unknowingly releases the Phoenix, which was laying dormant/trapped within the egg until Remy charged up the "potential energy" within it (which was really just the dormant Phoenix energy).

At first the Phoenix tries to go for Jean since she used to be a host, but when it recognizes Remy as being a mutant with incredible power (he's Omega-Level in this au, but his true power is largely dormant), it basically goes like "nah I like this one" and possesses him instead. Soon after that Remy passes out and is taken back to Earth (with a very worried Pietro carrying him as much as he can bc they're dating in this au bc I said so)

Assorted Ideas:

So after the whole thing on the ship weeks go by and no one really knows where the Phoenix is, only that it's out there and will probably try to find a host. Remy says he doesn't know what happened after the egg "hatched" and genuinely has no idea that he's become a host until the Phoenix reveals itself to him in the form of an apparition.

After that he just sort of keeps it quiet while he tries to learn to control it (after all he's learned to control his powers on his own, this can't be too hard right? yes. yes it can be that hard.) Pietro is the first to find out about it because he literally sees Remy sort of transform in front of him during Intimate Times, and that makes Remy freak out and makes him promise not to tell anyone else.

Later on, Remy accidentally hurts Pietro after lashing out (idk why they were probably arguing and Remy's already on edge so he gets angered easily) and since he burns him with cosmic fire, it takes much longer for Pietro to heal. However Pietro doesn't want anyone to find out or get the wrong idea about Remy so he keeps it hidden. Which doesn't last long when Wanda finds out and she immediately goes to beat Remy's ass only to discover the Phoenix Force within him (bc she can sense it and apparently Chaos Magic is one of the Phoenix's weaknesses). She lets him live when he explains that it was an accident, but she also goes like "I fought the Phoenix before, I'll do it again".

After that I'm not sure what happens, but I know it eventually leads to Remy being completely overtaken by the Phoenix and goes on a warpath to ""cleanse"" the universe while also being driven by his rage at the world and some of his (supposed) friends, but he's snapped out of it when Pietro gets close to him and gets him to calm down enough to gain control again. Eventually the Phoenix Force is literally pulled out of him with help from Wanda and Jean, but that whole process is painful and it nearly kills him but it ends up okay. (I'm not strong enough to kill main characters)

Anyways I hope this all makes sense since I was trying to take some notes plus discord convos and making it less incoherent and with less key smashes everywhere.

Thanks again for the ask! Glad you actually wanna hear about my ramblings and such. 🔥🔥🔥

[johnnys-coors]

Could you do one we’re tommy has a crush on the reader and so Johnny helps tommy by giving the reader 10 leaders (1 a day) and he like saying in the letter like how much they like the reader and some stuff abt them so facts etc. so when the last lettter came he tells the reader to meet him at the beach and soooo he standing there and stuff soooo then tommy asks the read out to like a diner and they end up going to a diner just of them and then they end up dating

Letters Made of Hand

Castles Made of Sand -Jimi Hendrix

Characters: Tommy, Johnny, and Y/N

Contains: fluff, kissing, and feelings

Y/N speeds up her walking, she is going to be late to Geometry. Passing by a row of lockers, she narrows her eyes to see '047D'. She rushes to her gray locker, hurriedly calculating her combination. “Ah, shit!” The lock has stopped moving, it's jammed. A few passerby's stares are felt on Y/N's back. The frustrated teenager’s cheeks grow red from the sudden attention. She glances at the clock right above a classroom next to her. Y/N has two minutes.

A raspy voice asks, "Do you need help?" Y/N whips her head to the right in surprise. Fluffy platinum hair reflects the fluorescent school lights hanging from above. The corners of his light blue eyes crinkle in a laugh, as Johnny finds Y/N’s distress hilarious. “Oh, shut up.” Y/N scoffs, frustrated with combination of her lock and the clock quickly running her out of time. 

“Say less.” Johnny ushers Y/N out of the way and pulls down on the stuck lock. The shiny metal unlatches with a snap. The boy grins, proud of his accomplishment. “Wow, you’re better than any janitor!” Y/N faux swoons, receiving a snort from her friend. She faces the locker and swings open its thin metal door. A white piece of paper floats down onto the beige tiling. Muttering a ‘What the..’, Y/N leans down to grab the note. Johnny notices this occurrence, becoming intrigued. “Is it a secret admirer?”

Opening the folded material, the letter is a page long. Y/N wouldn’t have enough time to read it now. She folds up the paper while grabbing her math supplies. Shoving two Anatomy books into her unorganized shelf, she slams her locker shut. “I gotta get to class, I’ll let you know what it’s about,” Johnny goes to protest, stating she has plenty of time. “See ya!” Y/N shouts over her shoulder, running to her Geometry class, leaving the tall boy behind. 

As soon as Y/N is inside the math class’ doorway, the bell rings. Sighing in relief, Y/N made it! The teacher looks over in disapproval, always expecting her students to be early and ready to learn. Ignoring the glare, Y/N bounces over to her seat, getting a few laughs from her classmates. Elated, and also flattered from a potential love interest, she giggles. Dutch, an aggressive blonde, elbows his desk neighbor. His bushy eyebrows furrow as he tries to keep his voice down. “Don’t tell me Johnny gave you my stash.” 

Jimmy grabs a hold of the broken lock at Y/N’s locker. “What’s this?” His tanned hands cradle the metal as he's kneeled on the ground. “Let’s just say I saved the day, Jim,” Johnny gloats, puffing out his chest. A familiar cocky smirk plays on the boy’s face while everyone rolls their eyes. Y/N lightly shoves the teenager, barely budging from his heroic stance. Bobby and Tommy smile playfully at their group of friends. “Let’s get some lunch.”

Cobra Kai saunters into the loud cafeteria. The typical cliques are in their usual spots. The Cheerleaders and Jocks in the center, the Goths in a corner near a large bulletin, the Nerds by the lunch line, and Cobra Kai next to the water fountains. Now don’t get the group wrong, they’re still studs even if they don’t mingle with the Jocks. Tommy just had to get one swing at the football team’s quarterback. 

Johnny leads them to the lunch line, reaching forward to snatch a plastic tray for himself. Y/N grabs one along with a shiny spoon and fork. The smell of pizza meets Y/N’s nose. Her stomach grumbles, a hunger rippling through her. “Pizza or salad?” The lunch man grumbles, he'd rather be doing anything else than serving food to rude high schoolers. “Uh, pizza, please.” Y/N requests, waiting for the oven-hot rectangular flatbread to slide onto her tray. And it does, nearly staining the fabric of her white shirt. 

Moving her tray to the end of the line, Y/N takes a cup of mandarin oranges and sets it down on her tray. She starts to walk to her seat while her friends pass by her on both sides. The white and gray tiles stick to her shoes as God knows what's been on the floor. Placing down her food, she opens her water bottle she snagged from her locker. The Cobras talk among themselves, laughing about a prank they pulled. Y/N twists her left wrist to open the blue bottle cap. She leans back and begins to take a sip. Cool water hits her parched mouth.

"Y/N, why don't you show us what you found in your locker today?" Johnny questions, more demanding than suggestive. She nearly chokes on her water in excitement. Placing the plastic cap back on, she sets the bottle back down onto the red table. "Sure thing." Y/N reaches her index and middle fingers into her front jean pocket. Her eyes flick up to watch her friend's reactions.

Johnny's eyes glow in anticipation, seemingly more blue then before. Bobby nods her on, his long wispy hair framing his olive complexion. Jimmy leans on Dutch, who could care less, while a small smile is in the making. Tommy fixates on his food, sawing off his pizza with a metal knife. The utensil shines as it reflects the school’s overhead lights. He seems off, really off. Squinting, Y/N makes out a slight hue of pink on the loudmouth's cheeks. He's blushing?

"Are you gonna let us see?" Dutch quips, impatient as ever. Finally pulling out the folded paper, it crinkles as Y/N smoothes it out with her palm. Clearing her throat, she begins to read the letter aloud. "'Dear Y/N, I hope I don't come across as a stalker when I write this. Here goes nothing: You may be surprised when you figure out the person behind this handwriting, maybe even shocked. But let me just say that you are the only person that makes me feel like doing a roundhouse kick to the moon and back'," Tommy laughs, saying how bad ass the scenario sounds. This earns a shove from Bobby to quiet him down.

Y/N continues, "'Yes, I'm that thrilled about you. I guess your smile adds to the feeling. No, I think it's your laugh. I remember when we were at the same showing for a movie and hearing your giggle. What I would do to hear it again! Signing off, Hendrix.'" Silence carries through the group, letting the love letter sink into their minds. Bobby breaks the quietness. "What do they mean by 'Hendrix'?" His forehead creases in thought. "I think it's code." Jimmy pipes, the only Cobra with a decent GPA.

"Well, Jimi Hendrix was a rock artist." Tommy suggests, after being quiet for so long. "Right, but who listens to him anymore? I only have cassettes of Boston and Motley Crue." Johnny's hand comes up to comb through his floppy hair. His mouth full of pizza, Dutch grumbles, "MJ is all the rage now." He imitates Michael Jackson, singing an off key 'Billie Jean'. "Okay, I think we get it," Y/N laughs, as an idea pops into her head. "Does anyone have the last name 'Hendrix' in our school?"

In the library for study hall, Jimmy and Bobby help Y/N flip through yearbooks. A stack of them lay off to the right of the wooden table's edge, about to crash to ground. Her eyes scan the names of people, as her eyes become tired from staring. She closes the book's black cover from 1982, giving up. "I found him!" Jimmy exclaims, as Bobby and Y/N crane their necks to see. The librarian hushes the teenagers, adjusting her glasses that sat on her nose. The fuzzy black and white picture showed an attractive Matthew Hendrix. The glossy page reflected dark hair and a white smile.

"I know this kid! He's by my locker." Y/N pieces together, the puzzle falling into place. Bobby glances up at her yearbook in her hands. "Is he in our grade?" He asks. The teenager doesn't want a guy older than the Cobras, he'll just mess around with them. "No Hendrix is in our grade, he does football." At the mention of the ill-fated sport, Jimmy quickly inquires, "Wait, it's not the guy Tommy punched, right?" Y/N shook her head in confusion. Everyone was either too drunk or high to remember who was in the party's fight.

The next day's events were rather quite interesting. Y/N got another letter from this 'Hendrix'. She opened the note hurriedly. It would be embarrassing for her if any of her friends found out. This second paper gave more details about how much they liked Y/N, but they also gave a reference she picked up on. It mentioned going to a summer camp in '83. Y/N went with the Cobra Kais, but other guys tagged along too.

So far, none of her friends had waltzed up to her, pressing more about the topic. Dutch definitely wouldn't, he scoffs at the slightest mention of romance. It's a wonder that he even dated, let alone lost his virginity. Johnny and Tommy have been far too quiet about these occurrences. Jimmy and Bobby have been the only ones willing to help Y/N find more about this secret lover.

The note only fueled a desire for Y/N to ask Matthew if he was writing her letters. She waits, leaning on her locker, awaiting the moment the said boy would roll around. The beginning of the school hours always dragged slow, as if in mud. Y/N hopes this event would bring her some newfound excitement. The first bell rang, signaling to students they had five minutes till class. A breeze blew on her shoulders as a tall figure slowed down their pace. Matthew slung a dark bag over his right bicep, shoving it into his locker.

"Hey, Matthew, is it?" Y/N's voice inquires, raising in pitch with giddiness. The teenager’s brown hazel eyes sweep over her figure, deciding if he should pick up the conversation. With a light sigh, Matthew nods his head. “Yeah, whatcha want?” Y/N holds up the notes that were slipped into her locker from the past two days. “Have you been writing these to me?” She extends the papers for Matthew to take. A look of curiosity takes over the boy as he accepts the letters. His eyes move back and forth as he scanned the writings. 

“I didn’t write these,” Y/N’s heart sank as this encounter did not go as planned. “But the handwriting looks familiar.” Matthew swears he saw this specific printing before, maybe written on his car in red spray paint? Reliving the memory, the red warning scribbled out a ‘NO MERCY’ on his beloved Dodge Turbo’s side. The faraway look in Matthew’s eyes causes Y/N to wave her hand in front of his line of vision. Coming back to his senses, Matthew shakes his head in disbelief. 

“Here are your papers.” Matthew presses the letters back to Y/N. She's positive that she nibbled onto the bait of this fishhook. She goes to ask him more questions, but he slammed his locker abruptly. Grumbling something about getting payback, Matthew heads down the hallway, turning the corner. He deserts Y/N, who's left with more questions than answers. 

For the next few days, each note gave more and more hints about the writer. So far, with the help of Jimmy and Bobby, she figured out that they like soccer and enjoy running on the beach. It’s not a grand discovery, but Jimmy assured her that every clue counted. Besides, the final note would be delivered today. Y/N is thrilled, she hopes the anonymous lover would reveal who they are. 

The Cobra Kai boys have been drifting in and out the letter drama, scrapping up details here and there. She walks into the lunch line by herself, as she chooses a salad today. Y/N decides to walk alone, she's packed with a lot of tests and doesn't have time to wait for the others. “Heya, Y/N.” Johnny greets, changing out his cassette tape in his Walkman. Tommy’s bruised hand covers one of the cassettes nearest to him, its taped title unable to be seen. 

“What’re you doing?” Y/N asks, as the boy seems to be moving the tape closer to himself. Caught in the act, Tommy stops moving the cassette. He lifts his head to meet his friend’s eyes. A nasty shiner around his right eye stands out against his smooth skin. The boy mentioned he fell down a flight of stairs at a party and tried to catch himself. Hence his purple knuckles. 

“Oh, I was just helping Johnny change out his Walkman.” Tommy comes up with, flipping the cassette so it was standing upright, the tape side away from Y/N. Her narrowed eyes dart between Johnny, who fakes a shit eating smile, and Tommy, who doesn't dare move until Y/N lets go of the subject. She sits down, letting the topic dissipate on its own. Her brain's tired enough as is. 

“Do you have the final note?” Bobby leans in, his long hair tickling Y/N’s cheek as he questions her. Y/N reaches into her trapper keeper, laying the letter between her and Bobby, reading silently. ‘Meet me at the beach after school, around eight. Bring your swimsuit!’ She almost jumped out of her seat at the butterflies overtaking her stomach. Bobby pats the back of Y/N, lightly laughing. “Well, there you have it. You’ll meet them after all!” 

The purr of the Firebird rumbles Y/N’s passenger side seat. The smell of the seawater fills her nose with her window cracked open. Johnny’s bright headlights gives way that they're traveling down the dark road. The whistle of the wind and the thumping of REO Speedwagon hum her ears. It's surprising that she didn’t bribe Johnny to take her, he usually would grumble about it for a while. This time he acted almost glad to take Y/N. 

Johnny pulls the car forward and parks it in the beach’s parking lot. She scans her surroundings ahead of her through the glass. The silhouette of a figure is down in the sand, facing the waves. “I think that’s my person. Thanks, Johnny.” Y/N unbuckles her seatbelt, ready to open the door and greet her writer. A tan arm swung out in front of her, holding a piece of paper. This stops her from continuing her motions. “What’s this?” Grabbing the note, she opens it. 

The infamous handwriting is there but another one is visible. A more hurried, scratchy one. ‘You weren’t expecting another letter? Calm your tits, it’s just a note from your letter carrier: Make sure kick ass when you meet ‘Hendrix’. He’s really an amazing dude.’ Johnny laughs, slapping his large hands together in amusement. Y/N mouth drops, the charade coming to a close in front of her eyes. 

“Wait, so you were the one dropping off the letters in my locker?” Y/N asked, her eyes shining in amusement. Johnny nods frantically, his hair reflecting the moonlight coming in on the dashboard. “Hey, it wasn’t hard to put superglue on the lock. It was pretty sick!” Laughing, she opens the car door, leaving the paper on her seat. “You jerk!” Y/N slams the door shut, leaving an emphasis on her words. 

The grainy white sand slows her walking as she approaches the figure. “Hello?” She calls, anticipating rising. Everything has came to this moment, it better be worth it. Brunette hair gently moves in the breeze, as goosebumps rise on her arms. No answer is given. The person’s ears are covered by a certain black foam, connected with wire. Sighing, she nears even closer. 

As if expecting the visitor, or listening intensely, an index finger presses pause on their Walkman. Turning their head, Y/N’s eyes widen and she covers her mouth in surprise. A set of brown eyes watch her reaction while they remove their Walkman, setting it down on their blue towel. A smile forms the longer the person watches Y/N. “It’s me.” The voice was bubbly and unapologetically loud. 

“Tommy? Oh my god.” Y/N’s face pales as she sets herself down next to the writer. The male leans over to the left and makes a show of taking out his cassette tape. ‘Jimi Hendrix- Electric Ladyland’ is written on the brown Scotch tape. “I’m ‘Hendrix’, Y/N.” She blushes, her face turning a shade of pink. “I figured that out by now, doofus.” Tommy quietly laughs, turning towards her. Silence commences.

Y/N’s heartbeat bangs loudly against her ribcage as she leans in. She pauses, just short of kissing him. Y/N wants to make sure he is okay with going further. Fortunately, hesitation is not in Tommy’s vocabulary. Her eyes close once she feels his lips on her own. His warm hand cusps her face, gently stroking his thumb on her cheek. His abs contract as he rests his back on his towel, his left arm propping up his head.

She lays to left of him, her face creating contact with his. Her hair falls over to the side, moving slightly with the ocean wind. Tommy’s hand rests on the small of Y/N’s back, as the warmth of his body pulls her in further. Running her hands through his hair, she gently pulls. A small groan is released from Tommy throat, rumbling Y/N’s chest. An innocent gesture but not so innocent reaction. 

Tommy smiles warmly when the kisses end, fireworks going off in his stomach. Y/N pulls herself up and sits facing the black waves, turning shy with the shared intimate moment. “Come on, let’s go for a swim.” Tommy proposes, rising to his feet and pulling off his gray sweatshirt. His toned stomach pales in moonlight, his crucifix necklace dangling down over his chest. His orange swim trunks are loosely draped over his prominent hip bones. 

“Like what you see?” Tommy teases, flexing his biceps. “As if, loverboy.” Y/N retorts with faux annoyance. She grips the bottom hem of her black top as she reveals her swimsuit, shedding her pants. It’s now Tommy’s turn to gawk. He stands like a little kid, with his hands relaxed at his side, his jaw slack. Y/N takes this as an opportunity to rush into the waves, splashing Tommy with the lukewarm water. 

“Hey! Come here!” Y/N giggles as he rushes over to lift her up off the ground. He spins her around once, laughing. Her eyes widen in thrill as he lifts her up even higher, getting ready to toss her into the water. Her legs kick in excitement as she grips onto his shoulders. “Ah, Tommy!” She giggles, not wanting him to let go of her. Her eyes lock with his own once again. 

Her laughter fades as they gaze at each other. Tommy’s adam apple bobs when he swallows thickly. He’s nervous. She feels herself being let down by the taller. Y/N stands now confused by the change in mood. “Y/N,” Tommy calls, more declarative than interrogative. “Can you be mine?” The water around her ankles feel colder than before. 

She nods, gradually getting faster with her confidence. “Yes, yes, yes,” Wrapping her hands around Tommy’s waist she pulls him in for a quick peck. “A thousand times yes.” She turns to exit the water and put her clothes back on. Her boyfriend follows, now noticing the Firebird that’s been there for over an hour. “Are you kidding me? Johnny’s here?” He whines, falling to his knees, his fists pounding the soft sand. 

Y/N giggles, amused by his dramatic ways. “Hey, let’s get some fries downtown? Johnny can take us.” Tommy gets up off the ground, grabbing his towel and Walkman. “Fine, it’s a deal. Race you to the car!” 

[icharchivist]

hello icha!!!!! learned from my mistakes and typed this out in a separate document. first i have to say im feeling a very deep connection with citron as of late bc i was giving myself a pep talk abt like physics and i told myself "face up and man the music!" and was like "...is that wrong. theres that song called man against the music isnt there... yeah it must be right" and. well i realized later. i also think the phrase "dont cry because it happened, smile because its over" is very good. also I’m halfway thru creating a very eclectic list of like. a Pokémon team for each a3 character which is… something. kinda knew it would happen to me. might take a while for me to finish it tho now that I’m halfway bc I’m suddenly having a crisis like “wait shit I’m only confident on my understanding and characterizing of like 4 characters am I good enough” so… it’s slow going lol. anyways. i finished that damn physics thing I was giving myself a pep talk about and so am treating myself to autumn/winter. happens that watching these events is also like. the only thing which reminds me to actually like. log into a3 lol. i am so bad at gacha games. probably a good thing in the long run. ok starting from the top!

hisoka going "zzz" as his reaction made me immediately go... oh dear, please dont fall asleep in the bath and guess what happened. yeah. good thing homare was there lol. speaking of i fucking adore homare and his poetry. id buy his collection. i also wish there was a collection like if there was a master list of every poem he says in like. at the very least main story. if not i will literally do it myself. i love homare so much im like him in that back when i had to play dodgeball id always be like kufufufu they cant hit me if im friendless enough that no one pays attention to me but like in my case it actually worked out. on the subject of the pillow fight tho, hisoka's crazy strong pillow fight throw... one more mark on the list for suspicious, maybe assassin occupation. this event made me realize how much i missed winter like. i saw the stranger pretty recently (which has caused the effect of be being like "taichi!! thats my boy!!" in my head everytime he shows up lol but anyways i havent gotten to a winter play yet so im VERY hype. especially bc this seems like it stars hisoka and homare??? like oh!! oh!!!! also detective fiction... im swooning. i also just enjoy the hisoka homare dynamic a whole fucking lot i think its nice how homare was like "yeah im ride or die for this funky lil amnesiac, why wouldnt you be?" and its just like. nice. feel like hes always reaching out to hisoka which is like. man homare is so nice.

back to chronology. ofc sakyo goes cheap for the hot springs lol. on brand as ever. was very hype for the azuma sakyo dynamic bc all i remember is like azuma trashing everyone including sakyo at some game or the other in one of the winter chapters and it was very good. or was this a clip in like a stage play? either way it was delightful. at first i misinterpreted taichi going "…" after azuma and sakyo said theyd never been on a field trip bc like. taichi being quiet or noncommunicative... after going thru autumn troupe act 1 it makes me fear for my life a little lol. anyways im glad he was just like planning fun times. speaking of taichi tho we got a tasuku taichi pair for etudes!!!! im not spoiling myself for later events but i hope to GOD tasuku and taichi do like a lead co lead in SOMETHING or at least like some mixed troupe event i want them to talk!!!

also dunno if this is an intentional pun but i enjoy that its called high spirits at the hot spring bc like oh theyre having fun but also bc like. "spirits" is used to refer to a certain type of alcohol i think? which is cool. dunno if its intentional but i liked that. anyways the talent show. taichis moving rendition of single ladies... ok i know it said single fellas but like. we know. wonder if that line was a different song in japanese? its not too old at ALL tho imo. anyways the way banri and juza being themselves Are the entertainment... flashback to when banri slaps juza live on stage instead of doing a stage slap lol. my reaction to azuma essentially went:

azuma: I can offer to bare my soul, and a little more ;)

izumi: what do u mean by that???

me: hey tasuku and omi were shirtless what's ur problem with azuma

anyways i reread and from what i understand they were maybe only flexing and doing a gun show? which like. no wonder it didnt last too long then lol. also explains why they didnt have shirtless sprites i suppose lmao. i am SO curious abt what azuma ended up doing tho that fade to black is so mysterious! did he tap dance? did he pole dance? the world will never know...

oh also im not like super familiar with azuma yet but my read on his personality is definitely like "I am so touch starved All The Time but I will be chill. :) :) this is fine :)" like he just seems to rly like being around people! just like basking in presence whether or not hes rly talking that much.

i enjoyed that juza mentioned pillow fighting with his lil brother... thats nice! i think a lot of this event was just focused on ppl having fun over the drama lol bc it got wrapped up sooo quick. i liked the bit where sakyos worried that izumi was out late searching for him tho it was so sweet. table tennis match was very fun although id argue calling hisoka and juza the two quietest tho lol like... banri exists so juza isnt quiet. just like inevitably. finally, the event cg!!! azumas hair tied up... so nice! thats how I tie my hair up sometimes tho it doesnt look nearly as nice lol. taichi rambling abt his first love for so long tho... lol. ill be honest i have to reread autumn bc i was not aware of this whole situation until it came up in the stranger and i like inferred from there. the end of this event was nice! it was cute. i dont rly have much thoughts on it but im so hype for the winter play

Hello:!!! so good to see you again, freshly learning from your mistakes then :3c

the connection with Citron is a BLAST to read about. I am glad that Citron is there, on your mind, supporting you at every turns of language. It's beautiful.

AND OH THE POKEMON LIST!!! thrilled to hear about it being a wip ongoing! take your time ofc and i hope you'll feel more confident as you go for your characters interpretation! i believe in you!

lmao i'm glad the events help you remember to play a3, i'm sure that by the time you'll be done with the events you will have unlocked so much of act 2 you won't have to worry too much about it. Anyway i'm glad you treat yourself to good things :3c

of course Hisoka fell asleep in the bath. tbh this event was a lot of "Hisoka almost dies in a spring house multiple times if it wasn't for his troupesmates". Between sleeping in the bath and almost swallowing the table tenis ball... where would we be without Winter, and especially Homare, taking care fo him.

I'm SO GLAD you like Homare that much! he's so so good! i'm sure there must be a masterlist somewhere, or well. can be done anytime i guess?? but yeah Homare is fantastic and LDJFDLKFJDF the evil plan to avoid dodgeball from both of you.. this is incredible DLKJFDLKF. But yeah alas he's loved by his own so he gets hit smh.

And yeah Hisoka is just acting sus huh.

BUT YEAH... YEAH... WINTER... BELOVED.... I feel regular and normal feelings for Winter as you know, s o .

(i'm so delighted that you feel that way about Taichi though, as he deserves!! what a good boy!!!)

But yeah Winter play next!!!!! i love the winter plays so much i hope you'll like it as well!! aND YEAH HISOKA AND HOMARE AS A DUO... for a DETECTIVE story?? so good.

I'm sO GLAD you like their dynamic! yeah i adore it too. Homare was so quick to leap into taking care of Hisoka? Like i mean he immediatly called him sleeping beauty when they first met, and immediately decided to be his roommates to watch over him, and then he did everything to take care of him and it's just so sweet. Homare has such a big heart he's so gentle with Hisoka. Homey and comfortable, whenever Hisoka admits it or not ahah.

ahah wouldn't be Sakyo if he didn't need to stay cheap. BUT YEAH the Sakyo/Azuma dynamic is pretty good. oh the event you talk about i think is in some of his very first backstage storyes (that you can read if you have them since they're at this point of the chronology). There's one where they play a mafia game and Sakyo is warry of Azuma because "people like him are those you need to worry about the most" and Azuma is just ":) you wound me :) i would never :)" and then Azuma wins the game and starts to mess with everyone. It was so fun. and yeah i see which clip you mean for the stage play!! it's so so fun they have such a neat dynamic and i loved to see it in this event as well.

and omg worrying about Taichi while he was just there preparing a fun time! this child really would have worried us all back then huh

but AHH YEAH TASUKU TAICHI.... It's such a neat dynamic! ofc i won't say anything but man i love the potential of their stories, as the two ex Godza boys. To see them bond and be comfortable with each other always make me so soft.

OH NICE CATCH FOR THE PUN! i think it must be the reason for it tbh, i love it! thanks for pointing it out!

The talent show was really fun yeah ahah! I wonder what it is in Japanese too but at least the localization was hella fun!

"anyways the way banri and juza being themselves Are the entertainment." THEY'RE SO SILLY I love them so much

AND LMAO YOUR REACTION AT AZUMA I LOVE IT. YEah i think Tasuku and Omi are just flexing (which is Still. SO FUNNY. Just there saying "our talents is.. our muscles...") meanwhile Azuma is like "my talent is that i'm crazy hot :)"

But YEAH Azuma... AZUMA WHAT DID YOU DO....

your read on Azuma's personality feels pretty spot on to me ahah omg. Staying with what you know about him, the fact that with his job and all, he seems like he's starving for connection while also terrified to make himself emotionally vulnerable. He loves staying with people, listening to them, caring for them, and he's touch starved as hell (i mean it's his job) but he doesn't seem to really know how to be on the receiving hand of affection. there's a flair talk, i can't remember where, with Omi at some point, where Azuma compliments him, and Omi is just "mhm.. but you know i think that it's more about you" and ends up complimenting Azuma in depth and it let Azuma dumbfounded because he didn't expect Omi to trick him at his own game, while Omi just genuinely don't get why Azuma is reacting that way. He gives he gives he gives, and he's genuinely happy with that, but he seems to have difficulties to take, or to demand for something, while also starving for it. I have so many emotions for Azuma.

Any mentions of Juza's little bro are the best things. I love this type of mention TwT

And yeah it was such a laid back event. Honestly deserved after the crying fest that was The Stranger imo. It's good to relax once in a while and it was nice to have them have fun. There was the bitterness of both Azuma and Sakyo's past that was always a bit looming but everyone was working so hard for them to enjoy themselves that the joy just overtake any sadness i loved it.

Sakyo worrying about Izumi is always adorable TwT

And yeah the Table Tennis match was so fun and chaotic LMAO. I love the dynamic between Juza and Hisoka. Just two usually quiet boys who like sweets. Except that yeah like you say, as long as Banri is around, Juza cannot be 100% quiet. Rip.

THE CG WAS SO PRETTY i loved seeing it. And omg you can share your hairtips with Azuma how nice :D Azuma manages to make everything look beautiful smh....

Oh yeah Taichi and his first love! if i recall he mentions it quickly at the begining, that Yuki reminds him of his first love, and he says that again at some point - then the fake Portrait he does he mentions his first love again. And since then it's been a reccuring topic so yeh :3c

but yeah! this event was really sweet and laid back, not much to say about it, but it was nice to have it at all!

Hope you'll like the winter play :3c

Take care and thank you again for your thoughts <33 i love reading them!! bless you!!

[wastrelwoods]

for the character ask gimme a kristen applebees

AHHH west. YES. YEAH

why i like them:

sarah was initially getting me into this series and i was like. you know i don’t really do this whole kinnie thing and she was like. well you’re going to kin kristen applebees i’ll tell you that much. and she’s never been wrong in her life so i guess i do! 

why i don’t: 

OH those first few episodes were rough!! ROUGH! the gal rly hits so close to home and that’s it’s own kind of hard to deal with. but i do appreciate it if only bc it’s so much fun to see her progress from there

favorite episode (so far): 

i’m only abt 2/3 of the way through freshman year but i can’t decide if i love more when she meets tracker at the black pit or when she gets actually wasted on like. one beer at ostentatia’s house party and makes out with a cheerleader who is CLEARLY and OBVIOUSLY a construct and not a living woman

favorite season: 

not rly applicable because i haven’t finished season 1 yet but like! ask me again later i guess!! 

favorite line:

FUCK. OH MY GOD. when tracker kisses her and she blurts out, “I actually, uh, I don’t kiss!!” in a lesbian panic. have not gotten over that that’s SO good 

favorite outfit:

that’s not fair to her bc as far as i know she only has one. six variations of the same tie dyed summer camp t shirt...and she wears them so well bless her heart. anyway kristen applebees prom suit when

otp:

sjkflg i mean it seems like she’s got a nice canon thing going but i also wouldn’t mind her with either of the other bad kids girls. i have baby gay energies to project onto all3 of those ladies in any combination at all and i am NOT picky about it 

brotp: 

oh geez well! kristen and fig!! at this current moment i am experiencing the exhilaration of those two being on-and-off roommates and just. tormenting gilear and every other unlucky son of a bitch in the apartment complex. also i think fig should give kristen an undercut and a stick and poke. fuck i should draw that

headcanon: 

i mean i almost can’t project anything on her she’s got it all already but i guess i can go for like....hmmmm....has never worn makeup in her life and does not know how to apply it. which end of a mascara wand is up? she doesn’t know. that might be basically canon 

ohhhh god also she and fabian are the same height and she could lift him. i want to doublecheck their stats to see if this checks out but i am, once again, only midway through the first season and i will NOT be spoilt

unpopular opinion: 

oh i don’t know any of the relevant opinions and frankly i’m not sure i want to...god i hope nobody baselessly hates her and thinks she’s annoying i would be Hurt

a wish: 

i feel like much of what i want for her CLEARLY happens later on in this campaign and i will be very satisfied when i get there but just. excited to see it

an oh-god-please-don’t-ever-happen:

she becomes femme

5 words to best describe them:

UHHHHHHHH fuck i don’t know i feel like i’m so early days!!! but just. my exact high school experience give or take a few fights to the death

my nickname for them:

i feel like kris works. i manifest that. someone refer to her as kris 

[misterbitches]

Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas. 

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL. 

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t 

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers! 

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die. 

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts  more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more.  i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done) 

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom. 

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through. 

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao.  basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman.  anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord. 

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop. 

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t.  beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when  i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are. 

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of  bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid. 

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc. 

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me) 

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao 

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and  i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex) 

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

[dickd0c]

STRIKE

CHAPTER SIXTEEN — “day four, pt one”

Nic woke up at about 11:00 A.M. the next day. She checked her phone and frowned seeing how late it was, rolling over to turn onto her other side.

On the other side of the bed, Alpha was sound asleep. Nic had noticed for the past few nights that he never held her or cuddled when they went to sleep. It was like while they were having sex—or more specifically, while he was teasing her, considering he hadn't given her a single orgasm yet—he was openly flirty and humorous among other things, but as soon as they were having any other interaction, he was back to cold and distant.

Nic rolled her eyes. She was in no mood to deal with his volatile behavior. She swung her legs off the edge of the bed and plopped down onto the hardwood floor, adjusting her wrinkled clothes before heading to her room. There, she brushed her teeth and took a refreshing shower. Nic hadn't told anyone, but she had applied for a job interview a few days back, and the interview was today. Despite waking up so late, she still had time to make it if she didn't stall.

Nic quickly dressed herself in a white blouse, black pencil skirt, and a blazer. She grimaced at the blazer before putting it on, noting to herself that she should get a new one—she'd had that one since her debating days in high school.

Slipping on some modest heels and checking to make sure her hair wasn't too unruly, she grabbed her phone and portfolio folder. Nic quietly walked out of her bedroom and into the kitchen where Tank was leaning against the island shirtless. When he saw her walk in, he dragged his eyes up and down, quirking an eyebrow.

"Why are you dressed like that?" he asked her, setting his phone to the side.

"Job interview," Nic replied shortly, her voice giving away her nerves. She flattened her palms out on the sides of her skirt to hide their slight shaking. She really wanted this job—as nice as it was to simply lounge around the apartment all the time, she wanted to get out sometimes too.

"Oh, what's it for?" Tank smirked.

Nic opened her mouth, but she was interrupted by the rumbling of her stomach. Tank moved around the island to get to the fridge, pulling out some milk and grabbing the box of cereal that was already sitting there. Nic smiled at him gratefully.

"It's for this European makeup company. They have a location pretty close by, and they're looking for lab assistants," Nic said, smiling nervously as she grabbed the bowl of cereal from Tank and set it down in front of her on the island.

"Oh, I think I vaguely remember you telling me you do science shit in college. What's your major again?"

"Material sciences," Nic replied, muffled by the bowl she pressed to her lips to down the rest of her cereal.

"Sounds smart," Tank said thickly, a goofy grin on his lips.

Nic rolled her eyes, smiling as she placed her bowl in the sink. "I have to leave now, though. Would you let everyone know I'll be back in maybe two hours?" she asked, straightening her skirt.

"Sure," Tank shrugged. "I think everyone decided to sleep in, they might not even be up when you get home."

With a nod, Nic was out the door with her phone clutched tightly, walking down the steps of the apartment building to see her Uber was already waiting for her. She opened the door to the back and climbed in rather ungracefully, giving a small smile to the driver before he took off. Nic spent the twenty-five minute ride rubbing her sweating palms on the side of her dress, glancing out the window every five seconds expecting to arrive. She'd occasionally pick up her phone to aimlessly text someone or play a stupid game, but then she'd drop it and go back to being nervous. She opened up her portfolio and checked to make sure her resume, references, pens, and notepad were all in there, and then ten minutes later she did the exact same thing again.

Nic's phone vibrated against her thigh, and she picked it up instantly. What if the company was calling to tell her the interview was off?

She looked at the screen to see that Athena was texting her, and sighed out of semi-relief. Using her thumb, she slid up on the screen to see the message.

Athena Received 12:06 PM good luck bitch! ur gonna kill it

Nic grinned, shaking her head.

Athena Sent 12:06 PM i'm so ducking nervous literally shoot me

Athena Received 12:06 PM they'd be idiots not to take u. tho idk how ur lab skills are but still

Nic sighed, glancing out the window. As she looked back down at her phone to respond, the speeding car hit what must have been a road bump, making her phone fumble in her hands before it flew to her feet. The driver didn't even mumble an apology as Nic rolled her eyes and bent down to grab it, seeing the screen was still on messaging. She typed out a quick "i don't deserve you babe" and pressed send, turning her phone off and sliding it inside her portfolio.

A little later, the phone vibrated again. She pulled it out and swiped the screen open.

Alpha Received 12:09 PM what?

Nic frowned, wondering what his issue was. That was until she looked up just a bit to see the very first message in their conversation, sent by her just moments ago.

Nic's jaw dropped open as her fingers fumbled to type out a response.

Alpha Sent 12:10 PM shit. sent that to the wrong person sorry

He responded quickly.

Alpha Received 12:10 PM sure you did

Alpha Sent 12:11 PM it wasn't for you

Alpha Received 12:11 PM are you really that insecure around me

Nic rolled her eyes and turned her phone off. She was already nervous, so she didn't need Alpha making her annoyed too. A minute later, when he probably realized she wasn't responding, her phone buzzed with another text from him.

Alpha Received 12:12 PM what time is your interview?

Alpha Sent 12:12 PM 12:30

Alpha Received 12:13 PM what are you doing?

Nic huffed—what was with all the questioning? It was like she had already begun her interview.

Alpha Sent 12:13 PM sitting in a car.

Alpha Received 12:13 PM you should sit on my face instead

Nic barely had time to gasp at the message, because just as she started choking on her spit, the Uber pulled up to the make-up company she would be interviewing at. Shooting a smile and a thanks at the driver, she stepped out of the car with her phone and portfolio, watching him zoom away like he couldn't wait to get away from her. Nic frowned, slightly offended. She wasn't even a bad passenger.

You get three stars for attitude, she thought to herself, tapping at her phone as she turned and walked into the main entrance of the building.

Tucking her phone into the pocket of her skirt, she walked up to the receptionist typing away at her computer. When Nic got closer, she could see the screen reflecting on the forty-some year old woman, cringing when she saw the main screen of a popular dating website on it.

"Excuse me?" she cleared her throat, seeing the receptionist click the screen away.

The receptionist peered at her over her glasses, scanning her up and down with a scrutinizing look. "Here for an interview for lab assistant?" she asked monotonously, as if she were tired of Nic's presence already.

Damn, why are strangers so annoyed around me today?

"Yes, I am," Nic replied, straightening her back. She felt her phone vibrate against her thigh, but she ignored it.

The receptionist pointed to the hall on Nic's right, a long manicured finger waving in the air. "The third door on the left. Good luck."

Nic thanked the receptionist, turning on her heel to walk slowly down the hall. She noticed that with every step she took, she could hear her heels clicking on the floor. It made her straighten her posture and lift her chest up—that sound always made her feel like a powerful woman.

She pulled the third door on the left open, peering inside to see a few people about her age seated on their phones before she stepped inside herself. A few of them glanced up at her as she walked past them, but nobody said a word. Nic took a seat at a wall where nobody else was, looking up as she sat to see two doors on the other side. She presumed that's where each interview was taking place, two at at time.

Nic pulled her phone out to check the time, while at the same time it buzzed again with another notification. She swiped up with a scowl, seeing two new messages from Alpha.

Alpha Received 12:14 PM i woke up with morning wood and you weren't there to help me :(

Nic nearly laughed out loud at the sad face. It was truly astonishing how Alpha's behavior changed when the topic was about sex versus when the topic was about literally anything else.

Alpha Received 12:16 PM are you ignoring me?

Alpha Sent 12:16 PM yes

Nic shook her head at her screen, tapping the sides of her phone as she waited for his next messages. She couldn't wrap her head around it—he could be intimidating, terrifying even, one moment, but annoying and overly sexual the next.

Alpha Received 12:17 PM that's rude. might just have to punish you

Alpha Sent 12:17 PM do you ever think about anything other than sex?

Alpha Received 12:17 PM do you?

Touché.

Nic glanced up around the room, getting an odd feeling that someone was watching her. However, all the other people were just like her—staring down at their phones. Someone sniffed, and Nic turned her head instantly to see a girl with straight black hair blowing her nose.

Shaking her head, she looked back down at her phone.

Alpha Sent 12:17 PM yeah, I'm thinking abt my interview

Alpha Received 12:18 PM hmm. I'm thinking about you

Before Nic could even finish reading his short message, he sent another one

Alpha Received 12:18 PM *your ass

Alpha Sent 12:18 PM what did I do to have to put up with you?

Alpha Received 12:18 PM oh didn't you just say you don't deserve me though?

Alpha Sent 12:19 PM shut up

Alpha Received 12:19 PM make me

Nic stared at her phone, twiddling her thumbs, unsure of what to say.

Alpha Received 12:20 PM nica?

Alpha Sent 12:20 PM yea?

Alpha Received 12:20 PM good luck

Nic smiled small to herself, tucking her phone back into her pocket just as one of the doors swung open, a girl with wild blonde hair storming out the room without giving a glance to anyone. Everyone waiting looked up at her with open mouths, watching her leave the waiting area with furious tears down her eyes.

Nic gulped nervously.

"Anica Jean?" a woman peeped through the open interview door, scanning the seated people with tired eyes.

Nic stood up, straightening her pencil skirt, catching the woman's attention. She gave her a small smile and a wave, following her into the interview room.

The room was a little small, making Nic feel a little claustrophobic, but that was probably her nerves. She sat in a comfy little chair in front of a table, behind which the red-haired woman joined an older looking man.

"How are you, Anica?" the man asked, sounding much more awake than the red-haired woman looked.

"I'm great—Dr. Chaves, right?"

He nodded, smiling. "And this is Dr. Yanovna."

"Good afternoon, I hope your days have been fine so far," Nic greeted, hoping her nerves didn't show through her smile.

"Thank you—so to start off, would you mind telling us why you want this position?"

And just like that, her interview began, a circle of them asking her questions and her responding in ways she hoped made her seem smart but modest at the same time. Slowly, her nerves seemed to ease. All the questions they were asking her were questions that she had expected and prepared for.

"So, Anica, what would you say your greatest weakness is? How are you working on them?" Dr. Yanovna asked, twirling a pen in her fingers.

Nic opened her mouth right when her phone vibrated against her thigh. The people in front of her just smiled at her, probably because this has happened in other interviews as well. She cleared her throat. "Well, I guess it's both a strength and weakness. I'm good at following rules and guidelines, but that also means sometimes I'll follow people's words blindly—"

Her phone vibrated again, catching her off guard.

She cleared her throat. "—especially when I think highly of them. It's something I'm working on, both in professional and daily situations—"

Another buzz.

"—by forcing myself to take a moment to think over the possible consequences—"

Again, her phone vibrated.

Dr. Chave cut her off before she could continue. "Ms. Jean, perhaps you should check your phone. It may be urgent."

"Thank you," Nic hushed gratefully, slipping her phone out of her pocket. It lit up, displaying one name.

Alpha (3)

Nic bit her lip, forcing herself not to glower at her phone. She quickly silenced it, slipping it back in her pocket, swearing to herself that she had silenced it that morning before she even left.

She looked up at her interviewers rather warily, glancing between them. "Anything else?"

"Actually," Dr. Chave cleared his throat, placing his hands over each other, "I think we've heard everything we needed to." He glanced at Dr. Yanovna, who nodded in agreement.

They both stood up, holding their hands out to shake hers.

"Oh," Nic said quietly as she stood. She shook Dr. Yanovna's hand followed by Dr. Chave's, making sure her handshake was firm despite the crushing feeling in her heart.

Dr. Yanovna seemed to catch the look on her face. "Don't read into this," she said, a reassuring smile on her lips brightening her tired eyes just a bit, "your interview went well. You should hear back from us in a few days."

Nic instantly brightened, so obviously so that Dr. Chave chuckled at her. "Thank you, really, thank you," she said, gripping her portfolio to her chest as they opened the door for her. "And have a wonderful day!"

She didn't even hear the next name they called out, deafened by her rushing blood, a grin on her face as she walked to the door to leave the waiting room.

"Wait!"

Nic turned around to see a blond man stand up from his chair and approach her. She frowned, wondering what he wanted.

"Yes?"

"Were you at that protest? Where the old man fell?"

Nic's frown deepened. "Yes... who are you?" she questioned in an accusative tone.

"Don't you remember me? I got dragged away with you?" he chuckled, and Nic got a good look at his puppy brown eyes and floppy blond hair.

Nic's eyes widened. "Oh! Yes, yes I do remember you. Did you manage to get away? One of my friends pulled me away."

The man shook his head, a frown playing on his lips. "No, I got arrested for assaulting an officer—which I guess I kinda did, but he had it coming. Anyway, they let me go after a few days. Their evidence was more incriminating towards them."

Nic winced slightly, eyeing the man and memorizing his face. "How are you going to explain that in your interview?"

He shrugged. "I'll just be honest, I guess. I'm Lucas," he said with a sweet smile, holding his hand out for her to shake.

Nic took it and shook, smiling herself. "I'm Anica—Nic," she introduced herself.

"Can I get your number?"

Nic's eyes widened slightly, her hand slipping from his.

Lucas rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, keeping eye contact with her as his smile turned bashful. "There's something attractive about a girl who'll attack cops with me."

Nic smiled, which instantly made him brighten up. "Sure," she said, taking his unlocked phone and typing her number in. "Good luck—it's funny that we'd be interviewing for the same position," she said with a small laugh, passing his phone back.

"Yeah—but I heard they're taking three people. Maybe we'll be two of them," he said with a small smile, dropping his phone into his pocket.

Nic tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. "Maybe. I know I wouldn't mind. Listen, I have to get going now, but shoot me a text, yeah?"

"Yeah," he said with a soft laugh, and Nic could feel his eyes on her as she opened the door and walked back out into the hallway.

Nic was glad to see a different Uber driver on the way home. She watched the houses pass through the window, still riding a high from being told that the interview went well. Her phone buzzed all of a sudden, lighting up to show two tames.

Alpha (3)

Unknown (1)

Nic slid up, opening Alpha's messages first.

Alpha Received 12:40 PM so have you considered the whole sitting on my face thing?

Alpha Received 12:42 PM wait are you in your interview right now?

Alpha Received 12:42 PM crap sorry. you got this

Nic then moved her fingers to open her message from who she assumed was Lucas.

Unknown Received 12:51 PM hey this is Lucas. just thought this would make you laugh—I got up to get a coffee from the hallway and managed to spill it down my shirt. now they're going to think I'm a criminal AND dysfunctional.

Nic smiled down at her phone before turning it off and looking back out the window, a deep sigh flying past her lips.

[fancybois]

So a few weeks ago Sophie ( @buzzfeedworthit​) and I came up with this AU based off of the In Control With Kelsey Worth It episodes and she complied it. It’s not a fleshed out fic at all but the idea is there and it would be a dope long length fic 

Vampire!andrew’s outfit from the sims

He’s a vampire gang boss (?) who runs an underground gambling ring/casino behind a restaurant

Casino is v fabulous and opulent

Steven is a rookie detective who is trying to take down the upper crusts

Upper crusts are an organization involved in bribery/financial corruption in local politics posing as a food club

Steven asks around and is referred to andrew

Steven goes to the underground casino trying not to reek of cop to meet andrew

He is v intimidated but andrew is such a character who loves cats and immediately takes to steven “yeah i do crime but what r u gonna do abt it if u need my help” dynamic

Steven begrudgingly moves forward w getting andrew’s help and andrew makes him part of the crew so he can go undercover

TENSION everyone else can feel too

Andrew’s underlings just roll their eyes every time andrew tries to flirt w steven but steven just thinks that is how andrew is

He gets flustered anyway

Underlings @ andrew: ur getting awful close to him, boss… whats ur game here

Andrew wants to drinks stevens blood too but in a sexy way

Eventually they infiltrate upper crusts

Steven starts a thing w sophia to get close to the mom (leader) for info

Andrew is salty

Steven confronts andrew about why he is so pissy and tension keeps mission from really making any progress bc of petty things andrew does bc he is jealous

Steven: andrew, this is my case i gotta do this tf

Andrew sabotages every interaction w sophia

Jealous? Logical next step? Kill the competition (andrew considers)

Conveniently, andrew finds out sophias treachery and that she has found out abt steven and andrew’s true intentions w upper crusts and esp her mother

S and A find out theyve been compromised and andrew offers to “take care of her”

Steven is like wtf no?!

Steven: ANDREW NO

Andrew: ANDREW YES

Andrew: trust me

But steven is adamant that andrew cant kill her so he turns her which forces her to switch allegiance to s and a and join A’s coven

So steven sees vampire!andrew in action and THATS how he finds out A is a vampire and  is like i didnt sign up for this shit

Andrew is like im pretty sure u approached me sweetie

Turning someone into a vampire looks to be a sensual thing w sharing blood

With loyalty from sophia they get the info they need on her mom but it also makes steven jealous that she is now in andrew’s coven (involves doing vampire rituals together and just more time spent together doing vampire shit)

Prompts steven to reevaluate his feelings and deal w shock of finding out andrews… condition (and realises that andrew spending time w sophia bothers him but not because he is into sophia….hmmm)

Im jealous of my ex fake gf???

Eventually comes to terms w it but is convinced andrew is not into him bc he has read all their interactions as andrew being flirty w everyone is just his personality

Also how could be possibly be w a vampire--one who already has a lady vampire conveniently in his coven

Steven decides he needs distance

Ignores andrew

Angst ensues

Decides he has enough info and it is time to get the boss of upper crusts and take her down

Problem is andrew is his only ally but steven is not thinking clearly and goes after her by himself

Gets into dangerous situation

PLOT TWIST: dangerous situation is that clara has control over bernard and she commands Bernard to possess steven

Compels steven (bernard as steven) to do bad shit

Then he is made out to be bad guy after getting caught doing crime

Gets arrested and cops think he has been feeding info to baddies or is even a baddie boss himself (of upper crusts which effectively stops cops being interested in them bc they think they caught the boss)

Ryan and shane are cops and they have to arrest steven even tho theyre friends and it is sad “how could u steven”

Andrew knows something is wrong, this isnt steven and he confronts clara willing to do anything to get bernard out of steven

He confronts clara in mysterious and tense and elegant meeting at jazz bar

Andrew: cut the shit clara what did u do

Clara sippin that martini “shame about your lover but bernard is so enjoying himself”

Andrew is like wtf so hes possessed???

Clara: u have something of mine

Andrew: ur daughter isnt a possession?? (andrew and sophia have bonded and are homies by this time)

Becomes apparent clara doesnt give a shit abt her daughter and just thinks it would be beneficial to have a vampire for upper crusts’ dynamic

Andrew goes to sophia and tells her what happened

Sophia knows he loves steven so she agrees saying it will be ok and a good chance to re-infiltrate

Bernard leaves steven and then she waits til the right moment and BLEEDS HER MOM DRY

Clara: go get ur man, andrew

Steven is locked up and andrew seeks out ryan and shane and tells them everything

But hes a criminal and as a consequence of approaching the PD he gets taken in

Steven is disoriented when bernard leaves his body (violent exit, body wracking, vomiting) and he is suddenly like What am i doing here what is happening??

Andrew has explained but nobody believes possession (cops r like yeah wow that was quite the stomach flu steven had)

So andrew is like: fine… and bc he needs to redeem steven he owns up to everything and says he was controlling steven

So steven gets let out as andrew is booked

They tell steven he was being “controlled” but the term means different things to the police and to steven (bc he knows he was at least blacked out)

Leaving steven heartbroken that he was manipulated (the tale andrew told to save steven)

Steven goes to confront andrew

Why, if any of their tension was real

Andrew responds by speaking in code that yes it was real and that he lied to get steve out so that he can finish the mission (and bc he loves steven)

Steven is confused but goes to sophia who tells him what the code means and helps plan to break andrew out

Steven is ready to do illegal shit and break laws to get andrew out bc love

Steven could confess to his undercover work and tell everyone that andrew was helping

What andrew was booked for no longer valid bc govt sanctioned task to help them bring down actual culprits

Andrew knows that steven doing illegal shit would change steven and he doesnt want steven to do that and convinces him otherwise and do do (above) rather than jailbreak and run away together

Suddenly Steven and andrew told theyre good to go and steven is like how? (he was in middle of planning how to explain but doesnt have means to prove it bc it was super under cover and involves supernatural)

Suddenly rie (police boss) comes out as the one who assigned steven the task and backs him up (thus why they were let free)

Upper crusts taken down w info provided by sophia- paper trail bc clara is gone leaving everyone in gang in disarray

Someone had tried to step up and strongman it by ordering a hit on another group to strengthen their position but it goes awry bc they suck at crime and leadership

BUT dun dun hit is on andrew and steven

Could one of them die???

Upper crusts set up a hit and then sophia tells S and A bc she had stayed on and so they set up a trap

BUT audience doesn’t know that sophia has told them and helped them so threat of ch death hangs

Lets hit go thru and then it is explained that they knew and baddie is like WTF man

Sophia had to let it go until last minute in order to catch rest of crusts and involve PD

Case ends and epilogue is S and A in hawaii (classic) one brings the other a drink and they kiss before being like u ready?? And steven is like u bet babe (bc they’re actually there for a mission as crime fighting duo)

THE END <3

[genderfluidmollymauks]

the session recap that @umbreeonic did as they eavesdropped on the game i ran today for my all warlock party

we start off after the portals, in avernus, realm of zariel

there’s a cool scary staircase very clawed up

caleb: where would you like to go? // AB: home

AAAASAHAKQKSKQJDOQKDKQJSQJ

THAT'S ME, TORY, REACTING TO CIELLA VOICE

VERY GOOD VERY VALID. I SUPPORT YOU

ciella starts panicking over the warlocks being mortal

ciella: how old are you? // ärla: five // ciella: JESUS CHRIST

catan starts looking to see where the claw marks lead, like a functional pc

oh hell yes weapon heist! rob the lost and found!

ciella: this is the worst planned revolution. in the history of ever

everyone figures out if they have magic weapons. misfortune does! that’s it

WEAPON HEIST WEAPON HEIST

ciella goes down the hallway with No claw marks, everyone follows the archdevil

caleb: catan- // me, has been reading it catan as in settlers of not cay-ten: :0

ciella: we live in a society.

misfortune: why us? // ciella: you’re warlocks! they can’t steal your souls :)

ciella starts to go on a rant abt warlock exploitation that i very much enjoyed

misfortune gets blood on her clothes and is like “it’s fine it happens a lot” and everyone is Distressed

they get in the lost and found room, which is full of many creepy things covered in blood stains

catan walks to a weapon first thing, like a functional pc

he gets a white shortsword with cold powers, misfortune finds a bunch of money and gems and stuff and some bracers, custos finds a book called the adventures of tarrington darington. also one called torture 101, and The Other Enemies that detail all the fiends enemies!

ärla finds a pitch black dagger and gets a CRIT 20 to figure out what it is! it’s a death dagger baby (nice plunker reference calb)

misfortunes mouse sounds like john mulaney. amazing

“this is a very smart mouse.”

squeakers - the mouse - scurries around the room to find stuff for misfortune. he finds something he says is amazing, and it is.

a corn cob

ciella is randomly throwing things around and finds a gray robe and goes “this is useless to me. it’s the wrong color”

misfortune tries to change the color but that doesn’t work

catan touches to feel how comfy it is. “not as good as bear pelt.” he still takes it

misfortune gives the bracers to ärla so she has more than 14 ac, like a kind pc

misfortune, realizing she’s the only one without a magic item, reaches out randomly to take something as they all leave. it is a FUCKING ioun stone FUCK yeah

NOW we go to claw mark hallway

there’s a set of spiiiiiiraling! stairs going up. they’re not trapped, so they all go up

ciella awkwardly asks the party about themselves. misfortune says she has a mouse. custos says he has a bird

using her speak with animals, misfortune talks to puppy. he is. the most perfect character.

i am the night

i have no need of a name. but my warlock calls me puppy. this brings him joy. this is my one purpose, to bring him joy and keep him safe. Are You A Threat

misfortune: did you know if you sharpen a pencil enough you can stab people? they never see it coming

catan doesn’t know the difference between a pen and pencil, like a functional pc

that doesn’t actually fit but comedy rule of threes

ciella explains that zariel is devil trump and won’t be in his office cause he’s gonna be golfing

catan: what is golf? // ciella: a product of hell

misfortune: golf is putting tiny balls in tiny holes for people with tiny penises

as they walk through the office building (cause this is an office building) fiends in their cubicles ignore the party but like, in a scared way

minimum wage is a copper a century

misfortune: well then why do they work here? // ciella: they sold their souls to the ceo.

catan doesn’t understand money because he is uncorrupted by capitalism

going up the next stairs, ciella starts being Sneeky. she’s not good at it

ärla, however, with her SECOND NAT 20, along w The Boys, are fine on their stealth. misfortune is so focused on ciella being quiet that she doesn’t notice her mouse is being loud, but ärla quiets him down

they aren’t noticed by two bone devils working at a control center, which is probably for the best

me, googling bone devils, seeing they have fairy wings: baby

time for party to kill baby :pensive:

for their surprise round, bc they did so good sneekin, custos starts by casting shatter on BOTH of the baby

however, being made of bone, neither of them seem THAT concerned with the ear shattering noise that explodes between them (aka half damage)

but the control panel, being an object, is much more exploded

so catan whips out his tome, flips it open to a certain page, raises up his free hand and summons what looks like a perfect sphere of ice and snow, which he then sends off towards the bone devil that's like, what, 50 feet away

(lou describes the action beautifully so i don’t have to, like a wonderful beautiful kind player)

lou: that’s 6d8 // AB: too bad it’s not 6d9 :3 // caleb: d9 don't exist AB

however, being a fiend, the baby doesn’t seem that upset by the giant snowball sent their way (half damage again)

ärla send out a bolt of glowing gold light at the baby catan DIDN'T attack, and the baby shrieks in pain because gold hurts more than snow

ciella then runs up, casting a quick hex on ärla’s baby, stabs it - so strong in goes into it's bone body like it’s butter - and it screams once more, and again when her sword pulls out

IT'S LEFT WITH 69 HEALTH

NICE

ciella does a radiant (gays) gaze, exploding the baby in radiant light, so it screams again. and now it can’t see, cause of the light

misfortune casts a hex (“you feeling lucky, punk?”) on the un-hexed baby, and the magic wisps around it’s neck like a chain. she rushes up to attack, pointing her sword at baby, and two quick blasts shoot out of it - an eldritch blast! the first one hits, pushing the baby just enough that the second misses.

i love the rich fiction provided here by AB that was beautiful

custos, seeing the badassery that is misfortune, also sends out an eldritch blast onto the blinded baby, so it screams again, as that is a theme

Catan takes out his tome yet again and summons a ray of more ice in his hand, and then chucks it like a fucking baseball at the bone devil that's looking the most awful

YEET

catan has a wonderful aesthetic i love him

ärla casts toll the dead on the scream baby, who is so hurt it fails COMPLETELY with a nat 1

ärla has one hand around her pendant, one pointed out at the bone devil, and she tweets a short melody that turns into loud tolling bells that torment the devil, it’s wings shrivel up into dust, it’s bones turn black, it lets out one final anguished scream, and hisses something at ciella in infernal before falling to the floor in death

ciella turns to other baby with another radiant gaze, and it does not look good as it erupts in golden light, it’s eyes are pure gold in blindness and it is shrieking in infernal, and ciella runs up and ends it's screaming in one fluid motion, decapitating it

ciella kicks the bones a little. “that was easier than i thought itd be”

misfortune repeats the word the devil said, as a question, and ciella replies back in infernal

misfortune’s spoken infernal is not very good but i love her

custos looks over at the control panel, pretty damaged, and sees it controls the portals

ciella explains that devils open up portals to the mortal plane to trap portals to force mortals into being warlocks. she taps a giant button that shuts the whole thing down, and it is now pitch black in the room

she casts light on her sword, saying the portals are closed. no one can go in, no one can go out - unless she says so

misfortune: what happens if someone was in a portal as you shut it down and got cut in half? // ciella: that is not how portals work

and as everyone tells ciella they’ll stay and keep helping, we end off the session! god you guys are badass

[dork-with-a-uke]

what's up my dude? how are you? i'd love for you to rate every song on pray for the wicked, just share a penny on your thoughts, which songs and/or pieces of lyrics are your favorites etc

hello my dude. i am aware u sent this in over a week ago and i’ve been meaning to answer but fact is, i’d started writing abt those songs in my journal and never finished. so i got around to finishing writing that, and i will now transcribe it (with additional comments) for ur enjoyment. im so glad u asked me tho thank u ily. 

here we goooo

1 - (Fuck A) Silver Lining

honestly, this one threw me tf off when i first heard it. no pretty introduction, this song goes straight to mf third base. grew on me though. back then i didn’t know this song was the first one off the tracklist (duh), and that makes the “to the old and to the new, we dedicate this song to you” at the beginning even more meaningful. this album, to me, is both past, present and future, with the acknowledgement of the past being v important to me bc it had never really happened before. as b said in a livestream, this record is “very honest in a way he hasn’t been”, and i think it translates. 6/10

2 - Say Amen (Saturday Night)

bold to put two bracketed songs in #1 and #2, brendon. bold move. i immediately liked this one more, when both were dropped at the same time. kenny and nicole’s (and dan’s!!) vocals are forever ingrained in my mind bc of that bbcr1 live lounge. i can’t wait to hear that high note live. ball kickin’ good. 7.5/10

3 - Hey Look Ma, I Made It

this song makes me so proud of how far he’s come. something about the melody, i think. “If you don’t know who you can trust, then trust me you’ll be lonely” is such a great line. strength in vulnerability, in the willingness to rely on others. i like it. also, i couldn’t believe the “boo-hoo” was an actual line when i first listened to it. people have mentioned how they disliked the bit when dillon comes in, but i think it adds an interesting twist. granted, the song could’ve done without, but it adds a more “modern” dimension to the song that symbolises his life rn, yknow? first the little kid w the cardboard guitar in front of the mirror, and now the grown man in front of thousands of people. idk. 7.5/10

4 - High Hopes

was pretty meh about this song ‘til i heard brendon perform it acoustically on the release stream, and then on that sirius xm live sesh? i think. felt like it all made sense then, the original, emotional meaning of this song came through the guitar strings. the cocky lyrics became hopeful prayers. this song is so much better stripped down, both instrumentally and emotionally. been trying to cover it (in vain so far. i’ll get there one day.) studio - 6/10 // acoustic/live sesh - 8/10

5 - Roaring 20s

man, this one’s the one that finally let me let out the breath i’d been holding for the first four songs. the one that almost made me cry of relief, because i always get so goddamn anxious when one of my favourite artists release music. roaring 20s, man. it has all the extravagance of being a young adult with the refinement of being in ur early 30s. the hook, the chorus. anD THE BRIDGE?? this song could be on a fuckin movie. also, the line “roll me like a blunt cause i wanna go home” is So Fucking Iconic, but can almost make me emo at the end when he says “i wanna go home”? how does he do it. and, like i said. 

But it’s Lord of the Flies in my mind tonightI don’t know if I will surviveLighters up if you’re feelin’ meFade to black if you’re not mineCause I just need a sign or a signal inside [give me a siiiign, i wanna belieeeeeve]

THE FUCKIN BRIDGE. dont say u cant imagine a concert room full of lighters swaying from left to right.  9/10

6 - Dancing’s Not A Crime

started writing this when the song wasn’t on yet and wrote “one of the ones i like less out of the non-single tracks.” well, safe to say i was Wrong. amazing beat, great brass in the background, and a tinge of nostalgia for some reason. i feel like panic tends to do that easily. happy music with a dash of “fuck, those were good times after all.” or maybe it’s just me. panic makes me feel nostalgic. it is known. for some reason, i love the line “I’m like MJ up in the clouds.” also “And if you’re night crawlin’ with him // I won’t take it lying down” KDFJHKSLJFHS 8/10

7 - One Of The Drunks

god, i love this song. the opening “welcome to the club” is so friendly, like it’s a Cool thing but u realise throughout the song that the club aint fun at all. that, followed by brendon’s solemn tone, the softness in his voice, you can almost picture his eyebrows lifting as he croons or smth. the “uncomfortably numb” will always make me feel some kinda way, i think. 9/10 bonus .5 for “i saw you lift that fuckin sax up to the microphone, and i fell in love”

8 - The Ryd Overpass

fuck, this one almost made me cry, for all the reasons you’d expect. the “someone still loves you” hit me so, so hard. he says it so cockily but it’s such a vulnerable confession? the entire vibe of the song, man. smugness mixed with longing, this shared complicity of a secret rendez-vous. everything in this screams ryden. the parallels, the little references. the slurred bridge, as though he’s drunk. “everything about you is perfect” hHHHHHHHH 10/10

9 - King Of The Clouds

eh. still not crazy about this one. this is the one single fucker that made me doubt the entire album days before the release (hence the almost-relief cry) it feels unfinished somehow, lacks drums & bass. i did think it felt rushed, and then brendon revealed that it almost didn’t make the album. to me, it shows. it’s his favourite, though. probably for a reason. 4/10

10 - Old Fashioned

if you ever wondered what a keysmash irl looks like, look no further. here is a very good specimen of me losing my shit. this entire song is just. reminiscing. seventeen years old. how it was great. swallowin’ and shit. hm yes. like i said up there, 10/10

11 - Dying In LA

this track was so perfect exactly where it was. bless brendon for liking slow tracks at the end. this song was catharsis, was release from all the emotions from the rest of the album, it was so perfect. the line “every face along the boulevard is a dreamer just like you” hit me right in the chest because it’s so true. this song is about someone whose dreams didn’t come true and it hurts me so much. the birds at the end made me cry the first time i heard the song because they kinda snapped me out of the trance i was in. goddamn. i can’t rate this one. heart out of ten. 

[dragimal]

alright just finished Crybaby, and here are my Opinions

(big spoilers for anyone who wants to watch it, and if u do plan on it, be aware of major trigger warnings like hardcore gore/body horror, death, full-on nudity/sex, and sexual assault. some of these elements are present in most dman adaptations to some degree anyways, but imagine those adaptations ramped up to 50)

things I liked:

- art style! I’m a HUGE fan of the fluid, gangly style, and it works so well w/ the high-action, intense fights

- the crying theme. it's a rly nice visual indicator that Akira is still in there, and how much he was affected by all the death and heartbreak. one of my fave parts of Akira as a character is how he has to reconcile his demon instincts w/ his humanity, so to see Crybaby Devilman break out into tears is esp powerful

- the development of the side characters. the bullies are some of my fave characters in the original, and I rly like how they were adapted into disenfranchised rappers in this one (and I esp love the relationship the one rapper had w/ Miko briefly like?? precious). speaking of Miko, she was EXCELLENT, easily one of my new faves, and her confession to Miki was heartbreaking. I also love that one gay runner (forgot his name..), and his camaraderie w/ Miko was truly mlm/wlw solidarity at its finest (before he y’know.... betrayed humanity...)

- I also rly like the approach to Miki’s character in this one; making her strong and capable was a good move. some ppl may know that I have mixed feelings abt og Miki, b/c I like her individually, but I hate how whenever she’s w/ Akira she bullies him for being soft (at least pre-Devilman) and forces him to protect her in fights she instigates. I like how Crybaby completely cut that from this adaptation and just made her awesome and actually nice to Akira. and believe it or not, I actually ship them in this adaptation, which is shocking to me b/c I’ve only ever shipped them in the chibi “Go Nagai World” adaptation and Devilman Grimoire. like that bit where Akira was all over-acting like, “oh yes, I saved you!” and swept Miki off her feet? I die. actually I ship Miki w/ several ppl in this adaptation, like Miko (of course), and that one bald rapper. also, was her “witch” nickname a reference to Grimoire? if it was, that’s cute <3

- the restructuring of the plot points to fit a slightly new plotline were mostly p good. like it was cool how Crybaby had Jinmen possess Akira’s dad, making for a double-whammy of pain seeing both his parents die at once. or how Devilman sucked Ghelmer straight out of Miki and burned the water out of his own body. just some neat changes. also I didn’t think any adaptation could ever top Jinmen’s subplot in terms of heart-wrenching pain, but look at that! Miki’s demon-bro topped it! thanks Crybaby I didn’t need my heart anymore!!!!!!

- Miki’s cat became a demon?? 10/10 easily the best part of the series

things I didn’t like:

- Ryo. just.... fuckin Ryo. part of me wants to like Ryo in any dman adaptation, so I didn’t actively hate him while watching the show, but the more I think abt how his character was portrayed in this, the more frustrated I get. like, Ryo is easily my top fave character from Devilman as an overall franchise (if not necessarily every specific adaptation), alongside Akira. so to see this character I love just whittled down to what he is here... it hurts, man. for those who aren’t super familiar w/ og Ryo, let me show u a panel that I think encompasses his temperament

Crybaby Ryo is cold, calculating, and largely unemotional. og Ryo, on the other hand, rapidly flips between stone-cold, almost comically blank, and hysterical. he’s not a “cool” character necessarily; Go Nagai may have attempted that portrayal originally, idk for sure, but any reader will tell u that’s not the outcome he achieved, nor how he was eventually portrayed in the OVAs. og Ryo is unhinged and clearly not emotionally prepared to take on the world, but by GOD that fucker’s gonna run in guns a-blazin’ or die trying. the simplest way to describe him is, “nihilist conspiracy theorist with a gun, oh god why does he have a gun who gave him that-”

just imagine this guy w/ a gun, shades, and blonde mullet, and that’s Ryo. but instead of getting that Ryo in Crybaby, we get, “unemotional nihilist (with a gun)” Ryo, and that’s rly all there is to him

and one of the worst things abt Crybaby Ryo is that he’s so.... reprehensible. not that og Ryo doesn’t do some terrible things-- he absolutely does-- but he either does them in such a hilariously goofy manner, or he’s so earnest u can’t help but shake ur head at him like, “Oh Ryo~” (again, not to excuse him, but trust me, there are ways to make villains charming, and Go Nagai originally hit on that p damn well, whether intentional or not). plus I don’t rly remember og Ryo ever killing ppl for the sake of “covering his tracks”. I only ever remember him killing ppl who were directly harming himself/Akira, and then just injuring ppl as a part of his goals (like that scene w/ him slashing ppl at the black sabbath is in the og version, b/c the sabbath needed fresh blood to initiate the transformations). I could be wrong, but I don’t think og Ryo particularly cares who sees him committing crimes, so long as he’s not directly confronted abt it. he’s.... not exactly a gr8 strategist in that respect... or at all....

and this is double sad for me b/c not only does og Ryo actually have emotions, but he’s so clearly pining for an oblivious Akira throughout the story, which is why they’ve always been my dman otp. there are some cute moments b/t Akira and Ryo in Crybaby (the pool scene, mainly), but they seem more instigated by Akira on an unwilling Ryo, and Ryo seems to only keep Akira around for the muscle/demon-power, so I can’t rly buy Ryo’s apparent “affection” for Akira here at all....

- there was too little build-up to Akira becoming Devilman. like the whole first volume in the 5-volume og series is dedicated to Devilman’s buildup and initial transformation, yet only one ep of this 10-ep series is dedicated to it. this fails for several reasons: 1)  the longer build-up in the og establishes how close Ryo and Akira rly are, and how willing Akira is to help Ryo, even at the expense of his life. 2) the og build-up gives you time to get attached to Akira before his transformation, and not only feel his pain at losing parts of himself to the transformation, but also the ability to recognize when his Akira-brand humanity is making an appearance post-Amon. 3) why the hell did Akira believe Ryo so readily? why isn’t he concerned at all about either demons’ existence or Ryo’s mental health? where’s Akira’s classic, “WHERE’S THE PHONE,” reaction??

- now setting aside my love for og Ryo, and Crybaby Ryo’s likability as a character for a sec, Crybaby’s approach to Ryo RLYYYY fucks up the entire Satan plotline for me. in the original, Ryo also doesn’t remember being Satan, so he is also trying to help humanity. but in the original, you FEEL that! you can feel how hard he's trying, and yeah he goes abt it in often dangerous/morally dubious ways, but in the end (before he regains his memories), his goals are for humans. he's a, “sacrifice the few for the many,” kinda guy-- which is absolutely questionable, but still has humanity as a whole in mind

Crybaby Ryo, on the other hand, doesn’t feel like he has ANY protectiveness for humanity, even when he's still under the impression he's a human. hell, I thought this adaptation had him start out knowing he’s Satan and actively manipulating Akira for his plans the whole time, that’s how little I believed in his want to protect humanity (I mean, the 2004 live-action film went that route, so u can’t rly blame me for being wary). maybe it would have been different if I had come into this fresh, not knowing Ryo was Satan, but I just never bought that he was anything but manipulating everyone specifically for the demons, so I was kinda surprised when he started to “regain” his memories b/c I thought he already HAD them. which is just frustrating b/c that big reveal is one of the best twists ever, in the original! b/c u believe this weird gun-toting dude’s rly truly trying to help out humans, but it turns out he’s been in the demon’s league the whole time!

b/c of this, the Crybaby ending also severely lacks the emotional punch of the og end, when Satan realizes they were wrong (and no, ”you taught me abt love,” is not the same thing as confronting their mistakes)

- and that leads into how Crybaby dropped the ball on the demons in general too. in the original, the demons were Earth’s original lifeforms, but this didn’t please God, so he tried to wipe them out. Satan was the only angel who defied this, trying to protect these creatures who had the right to keep living. THAT was why Satan was cast out of heaven, and Satan convinced the demons to freeze themselves into hibernation until they could later confront God together. upon reawakening, Satan and their demon crew are pissed to find the world taken over by humans, and THAT’S why demons have a grudge against humans. thus, Satan decides to disguise themself as human and tuck their memories away in order to intimately learn the weaknesses of our species in order to end us. all the demons were in on this plan, and were willing to sacrifice themselves to the cause. in the end, when Satan is sitting on Sadness Island w/ (half of)Akira, they realize that in their rage, they turned into exactly what they originally opposed, but it’s far too late to reconcile their mistakes

what’s the motivation of Crybaby’s demons? uh... fuck man, idk. snuff films? I guess they want to be revived, but why aren’t they in on Satan’s plans? why are they all surprised when Devilman is made, when this is a specific goal in Satan’s grand scheme? why didn’t Jenny reveal this plan to anyone else? how did demons’ “essence” survive, can we plz have more of an explanation for that? it doesn’t make sense???

not that the og didn’t have its own weird explanations for things (”global warming is melting the demons out of their hibernation! also here’s a complete misinterpretation of evolutionary theory!”), but idk man, at least it mostly made sense w/in its own canon, I think. 

- the one other big thing that bothers me is the fact Devilman, the franchise, exists Crybaby? like I get that it’s just a joke, but it wasn’t just one-off, like this is brought back SEVERAL times, and it rly breaks my immersion every single time. like if the dman franchise exists in Crybaby, why is anyone here surprised by anything? and it’s not even an obscure story in-canon, it’s popular enough that ppl recognize the character, and Miki’s brother is obsessed w/ it. so if there’s a rly popular story that already reveals more-or-less Satan’s entire plan to the public, why are ppl so shocked?

the only way I can justify this is that it seems like maybeeee the only part of the dman franchise that’s present in the Crybaby universe is the 70′s tv show, which has a distinctly different plot from the original, and doesn’t feature Satan at all. but even with that explanation, not everyone who’s watching Crybaby knows that, and it’s still immersion-breaking even knowing that. like if they wanted a cute reference to Go Nagai’s works, why couldn’t they have featured Mazinger Z, or hell even Violence Jack

- some of the psych horror of the og/OVAs was cut and that’s a real bummer b/c it was honestly more horrifying than the gore. like og Miki’s parents phasing thru the walls/furniture when Ghelmer is attacking? that haunts me. also a lot of the demons in the og sacrifice themselves by merging w/ humans and killing the humans and themselves in the process in order to increase mass panic in the humans, which is a horrifying but cool tactic

- thankfully these bits were p quick, but everything involving the Amazon natives was....... uncomfortable at best. like, fair-skinned boy being worshiped as a god by darker people? hmmmmm. like idek why that part even existed, why didn’t Ryo just immediately wake up on that island where Akira lived, why did he have to be raised by the people in the Amazon only for him to become an orphan on that island anyways. Akira could have still found him on that cliff later on, it’s not like Satan Themself would have died if he wasn’t cared for as a baby. it would even make sense for Crybaby Ryo, considering that lack of affection in his formative years could have made him into the sociopath he is today

also when Ryo was explaining how old monsters of myth are demons, there were a few shots of gods shown, like.... Ryo.... those aren’t monsters those are religiously/culturally significant figures wtf are u doing...

- this adaptation is weirdly sexual? I mean, most dman adaptations have weirdly sexual elements, but most of the time it’s purely nudity with some /hints/ at sexual elements. like, ppl just Happen To Be Naked, and also sometimes make sexual comments. not that this isn’t questionable in and of itself (Silene’s og design, w/ her tail feathers UNDER her buttcheeks is uhhhhhhhhh), but it never felt like sexual assault or anything when ppl were fighting; ppl just happened to have their Whole Titty out when fighting. in Crybaby, there’s a blatant connection between the violent gore and the sex, and it’s uncomfortable at times. like I’m not necessarily a squeamish person, so most of the time I wasn’t that affected, but when Akira-- our hero-- effectively raped Silene on-the-fly during their fight I was like NO THANKS

overall opinion?

despite how long the “didn’t like” section is, I do like the show a lot. it’s strong as an independent series, and there is a lot to love as a dman fan as well. however, Ryo is not only an important character to me, but to the Devilman franchise as a whole, so to drop the ball on his character isn’t just insulting to me personally, but weakens Crybaby’s overall lore/plot in places it should be strongest

[pilotheather]

aye, really starting to loathe the “yaz kills either graham/ryan whilst under the dalek influence” like-

1. first of all. hate this presumption that graham/ryan have to die. personally, im fine with companions dying - clara’s penultimate exit in face the raven was done beautifully, i think, and i will FOREVER resent them not leaving it like that. however with graham and ryan? literally, i just feel like... it’s so cheap. it offers nothing, babes! and it’s just infinitely LESS interesting than if you just kept them alive.

all the companions, in my opinions, still lack development. i do love them! i really am warming to them. but we’re two seasons in, and the fact of the matter remains they just... haven’t gelled too well with the show proper and they aren’t as fully realised as they should be by this point. and frankly, its not one singular problem moreso it’s an interwoven web of issues (hence it’s hard to really unpick that, without unravelling the whole mess) that have affected the show completely. the point is, despite being here so long, they just still feel so unexplored as people and a little unknown to us and idk!!! i think killing them, wouldn’t offer much in the way of anything interesting - other than, like i said, a very cheap way to instigate tragedy, and springboard some trauma-induced development for yaz&13 - because we aren’t really gaining more than we’re losing here, man.

clara’s exit in face the raven WORKED because it had been building up to it all season. i also dont like amy/rory’s exits (but that’s v potentially my own biases) but theoretically, i can see the vision for that- and the reason why that would be so tragic, is BECAUSE amy&rory are so fully formed at tht point that that loss hits. im not sayin graham&ryan dying would NOT be sad, but it’s... just too soon, still, for me. and when, narratively speaking, they’ve been setting up them thinking about leaving anyway? at least, ryan has? just doesn’t feel quite right at all and just like i said: a pointless attempt, at taking their exits, and doing weird tragedy shit with it for the sake of it.

especially when the ALTERNATIVE is they can stay on in the same way martha did: on earth, totally fine, and with the opportunity to reappear in later seasons. they can progress offscreen in ways that can be satisfying, in the way martha did. she moved on; she became someone different; and yet that change was still guided by what we had seen. same can be done with ryan and graham, finishing their stories and making them all the more satisfying.

2. piggybacking off of that. literally, this scenario of yaz killing them: what would that DO for yaz exactly? like.. what big payoff are u expecting from her? you’re just... horrifically traumatising her. and im wondering, like- where would that leave her in s13?  because she’s supposed to still be here, then, and supposedly travelling with the doctor. and again it just feels so damn cheap: because yaz really does still feel like she’s at the beginning of her story, despite being here for two years (and god am i a little mad abt that; it’s so, so sad that she really could be replaced with a cardboard cutout for most of s11). explore what we HAVE of her, first, before trying to go so damn dark with her. it’s not going to have the payoff you want. you have to work a bit more, to do something like that first. using some fucked up shit like that, just as a springboard for character development it just- it feels so damn lazy to me...  and again, i do not feasibly see how this could properly segue into s13 on that damn note. like the conse

3. and just... god in general. i just. okay again with chibbers and his writing. literally i dont want to sound so negative abt chibnall bc like SOME ppl really do just fucking attack . KILL. over every damn thing, without a breath and its like... okay babe. okay. and i mean, granted i can be a little like tht with moffat tbh - and so  i get ppl do get a little FERVENT when it comes to shit they dont like but- BUT MY POINT IS. i really dont hate-hate this era of who. s7 will still be my least favourite, even if i do still regard this all as bottom of the pile stuff- and that is frustrating, because it really does have potential! but anyway god. what was my fucking point. oh yeah. chibnall. if this was the case.... if this really did fucking happen. god no offence but fucking hell i do not trust chibnall to treat such a heavy scene well enough. not with the way s11 and s12 have been. and its just because... again this is all the WEB OF ISSUES with these seasons... but all of it just boils down to: every single script really needed a second or third pass over. ITS LIKE, things are kinda right, but its always jsut...wrong and its soi many things that just dont quite work and  instead all work in tandem to bring this ship down.

too many companions, leading to a bloated tardis; leading to none of them getting enough focus; leading to weaker characters whose dynamics with each other aren’t always hitting. there’s swathes of s12, where the doctor is just completely disconnected from the companions altogether. she just doesnt talk to them. and there’s a difference between her being detached, and her just.... LITERALLT FORGETTING THEY EXIST. i remember- was it ryan who disappears at one poimt, and she JUST DOESNT NOTICE? and then all of them disappear in fugitive? like its just so... the companion-docgtor relationship is so INTEGRAL to the whole show!!! it makes story beats less effective; not even that, the whole energy is brought down, because they just don’t TALK properly (and the dialogue... good god, is it stiff: and whilst i hated 11′s era of mutated LOL THAT’S SO RANDOM. THE HORSE IS NAMED SUSAN. BOWTIES FEZ FEZ HOW MANY MARKETABLE RANDOM SHIT CAN WE THROW AT THE PAAAGE it felt like characters were bouncing off each other... there’s now these long pauses, places where it should have been snappier, awkward remarks thrown in there and then) . it, again, bloats EVERYTHING bc half the time you have to just give stuff for these ppl to do and its like man, why! why ! its all so.... sloppy in a way that’s sad bc it was ALMOST right. things are ALMOST right here but it doesnt QUITE work and it needs pulling together into something neater, tighter.  AND GIVEN ALL OF THAT. i do not think, with the way he’s been handling things, this man would ever be capable of pulling off something as fucked up like that in a way that has any weight even disregarding the two above points

4 lastly. just fucking dont kill ryan man. c’mon. how many main, black characters have we had? hmm, let’s see. martha, mickey, danny, bill. we’re going at a 50% survival rate, with the other two facing pretty poor treatment in the writing room in general. no, im not letting it go: you cant literally refer to mickey, who was the first, like, leading black character on the show, as a fucking DOG repeatedly.  if you’re gonna decide to diversify the tardis, pay your dues; dont fucking axe him for what, again, really just feels like empty emotional tortureporn. ryan deserves better.

[chickenfetus]

all moongan

thank you for asking falen tbh i love u sm and i love doing these 

omg is this ask for this ask meme i literally almost posted this along with the wrong ask fml

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

more cereal than mik because.. i dont eat cereal with milk……… i love the crunch

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

as someone who lives in a tropical country is that what its called idk we dont have seasons and it never gets lower than 25 degrees so yes that would be ideal

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

hrmmmmm… i just remember the page number?? or try to lmao if i dont remember i just skim through the pages and try to recognise where i left off

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

with at least 2 packets of sugar tbh…. i dont drink coffee

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

omg story time i went 2 get my braces removed and the dentist wanted to take pics so he was like “smile with your teeth!” and i was like ok! but then he kept saying i wasnt doing it right lmao… guess whos never smiled b4… (me) so he told me 2 practice my smile lol i didnt answer the qn but ya,,, i am probably

6: do you keep plants?

i used 2 be very against plants… now theyre okay i guess i dont rly keep any

7: do you name your plants?

refer 2 6

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

art??? i havent drawn in awhile

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

no LOL

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

on my side!!!! i cant sleep on my back bc i gotta hug smth.. and my stomach is out of the qn

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

🅱️… and .. same brainwaves…. poor mans ____…. this is all from the shady hq im so sorry my other pals

12: what’s your favorite planet?

the moon for no real reason

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

hMMm, watching astro and mx perform??? and just being shady with bell lmao

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

this… question,,,..so im thinking of a bright place with white walls and translucent curtains so the light call fill the (living) room perfectly and everythings really ??? sunny and shit idk its warm… the floor’s made of (fake?) wood and theres a small kitchen bc i cant cook and idk if my friend would be able to lol.. theres 2 bed rooms both are painfully small but it works.. theres one other room with a closet for clothes… the bathroom is just a shower, sink and toilet… theres no washing machine rip and ?? thats about it poor mens life

i watchd the like we used mv again and i realized ...... that is literally where i got this imagery from thanks the rose i love a relatable band

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

heres a fact (?) from me first: it rains diamonds on one planet ?? mecury maybe?? mars??? whomst.. this isnt even a fact its ,me trying to recall shit

ok real fact: There are thousands of other planets out there. sorry lads this website doesnt wanna have fun

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

is spaghetti bolognese a pasta dish

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

im chill with my current hair colour??? bc its brown sometimes idk shitty hair

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

i asked my irl friends (group name: panic support group) and this is what they said

K: everything

E: when u were one hour late (i dont remember this happening but i do know im always late but never for an hour past me wyd)

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

goDD i dont but i sure want to

20: what’s your favorite eye color?

this is strange but every eye colour is my favourite although ppl with two or more colours in their eyes are so cool

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

its just my school bag lmao i got it 4 years ago and i take it everywhere even if the event is “small” and they ask us to bring “smaller bags” ill bring my big ass school bag anyway it looks like this (i dont have to but linking stuff is so fun)

22: are you a morning person?

technically.???its the holidays but i still manage to get up before 10 (most of the time) and … even if i have like 5 hours of sleep i manage to feel awake really easily????

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

tf i just use my phone lmao this is what ive been doing for like a month now… i could watch every vlive i havent watched yet, i could make video compilations i could practice my art but… even though im out of school im still procrastinating.. legends only

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

mmmm falens the closest to that

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

my classroom

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

white converse??  i have 2 get new ones every like 2 years since theyre also my school shoes and break easily….. other than those i have my blueblack converse too (i dont wear them as much so theyre still in one piece)

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

i dont eat bubblegum bc im always afraid ill swallow it and die and im p sure its illegal here

28: sunrise or sunset?

sunset but i dont look outside enough for either

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

hm……… with jen its when she sends me asks on anon despite it being super obvious like im not a Fan when my friends send me asks on anon bc sometimes i cant tell and i get a sense of false hope but w/ jen its okay but i know its her

with bell its when they reply to my keyboard smashes with their own keyboard smashes lmao and when they just??//?? say smth cute abt their faves (lately its been sanha thank u sh)

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

ya lmao when i have 2 sleep alone and its completely dark i have half a mind 2 believe some random supernatural being is out for me

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

hmM. socks are great i always wear them bc i wear shoes almost every time i go outside… i dont have any weird socks bc im Boring but i have 3 pkmn songs and 1 gudetama socks/.. bUT I DID buy my friend those socks with individual toe pockets… it was so funny when my other friend saw it she choked on her drink and almost spat it out. we laughed so hard we hit our heads against each other i love friendship.. i have 2 wear white socks for sch bc… aesthetic? god if i know lmao….. i only ever wear ankle socks bc….. socks any higher than that? cancelled.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

listen ive never stayed up later than like 1am ok maybe 2am??? but i was working on like a project that was due the next day for school with my groupmates (friends) so does that count lmao

33: what’s your fave pastry?

bread………. sugar donuts…….. i am Aware that thats not how u spell it but wtv

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

why does this ask so many qns in 1 qn……. i had a cat?? it had pink stripes and it didnt have a name bc i dont name my stuff… even my pokemon.. and yeah i still have it except its in a big dusty bag where all my other toys are kept

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

i kinda have to use stationary for school so ya.. p often is correct… pretty pens??? i dont rly see the point whoopS!!! in exams u can only use black or blue so

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

im listening 2 day6 so like day6

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

my room isnt even my room i just go there to sleep .. the place im always at is like a study area except its open?? so everyone can see me lol and . its not messy?? if u look at it from far but the shit on the desk and shelves are so fucking messy god i need to pack those

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

aLRIGHT LADS welcome 2 megans ted talk

(skip this if ur not fond of drama)

so something (refer to the song he said suits myday) happened with jae recently and ive seen fans trying to defend him by @ing him and saying that they love him which is fine - great even! but what i dont approve is how everyone’s basically forgotten about the whole matter because they had concerts so instead of @-ing him and asking him to explain himself, they tell him what a great concert it was which is also great bc their concerts are honestly amazing. basically my pet peeve is when ppl dismiss the problematic action of some people just bc they like them.

another thing is that there were some fans who started guilting others for wanting to drop day6 completely because of what jae did and in my opinion i think it is totally cool to want to drop a group if they did smth bad like??? its ur life???? u can choose who you want to like. what is not cool is pulling out all the good things the person has ever done in their entire life and try to remind others about the positive sides of the person. yes. they’re an encouraging person, etc. but that does not cancel out the bad things they’ve done until they explain/apologise. what is infuriating is just the manner some people took it?? they literally went ahead and tweeted shit like “would your parents drop you if you did smth wrong?” and “you’re seriously gonna drop someone whos been nothing been nice because of one incident?” yes. people will and you dont have any fucking right to stop them? so dont go pulling out receipts.

another thing. its also okay to want to stan the whole group even if someone has done smth problematic. like? to me youre cool if youre able to see and acknowledge the bad shit someone has done and still stand by their side while educating them at the same time its nice to have faith in your idols. however, i wont say much when your idols dont respond and/or respond in a way that shows absolutely no remorse. its cool if you want to support them too, despite that.

tldr; dont fucking excuse someone’s behaviour/action just because youre so far up their fucking ass. dont pull out shit from before either, be it good or bad. and lastly, its okay to want to drop/continue supporting them, its your life.

i just wanted to talk about this tbh,, it was nice to see a few mydays trying to urge jae to explain the whole situation but seeing as he still hasnt and couldve it really irks me :-/

okay update its been a day and i havent really thought about this but im kinda conflicted now bc jae still hasnt talked about the song and im probably just making a big deal out of smth that will never happen again but it really doesnt sit right with me knowing that jae recommended that song to his fans and said it suited mydays?? bc looking at the lyrics... i SURE hope not... idk i have neither forgiven or forgotten but he’s okay now.? i cant stay mad at someone for that long anyway ill never forgive him 4 it though lmao petty ppl only

another thing... jae’s still an amazing person to me with all the encouraging words he says to mydays but this one incident is just soOOOOO hrm and i did go off tangent with the question as usual lol

39: what color do you wear the most?

i wear a lot of colours tbh??? but bc its rly hot out ive just been wearing the same shirt every time i leave the house and its black so

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?

i dont wear jewelry rip

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

challenger deep

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

hm,, ive only ever visited this coffee shop like more than once bc the girl i used 2 like showed it to me b4 like 2 years ago and it was nice i liked their mocha frappe and its cozy i guess??? sometimes i go there with friends to study/just eat but i havent gone in awhile.., its two stories and it has an open air sitting area too i prefer sitting inside bc the sun is a big no thanks.. the ceiling is kind of like?? going downward?? like the kind iin attics???? idk man it was nice

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

u cant see shit here sorry

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

cant relate

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

yea?? sometimes i just gotta bc my brain wont shut the fuck up

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

suddenly all of the puns i know have left my mind thanks @ me

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

vegetables

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

the dark and whats basically in it???? like ghosts zombies and shit u kno the scary shit

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

i like buying albums?? theres a CD in those so it counts lmao i bought sunrise by day6

50: what’s an odd thing you collect?

boxes??? like containers????

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

boxy and letting go by day6

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

YOU KNOW I HAD TO DO IT TO THEM and oh worm

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

me: rocky.. ?????? from astro.. /?? no ive never heard of any of those and i saw the word horror so u wont hear abt those from me any time soon

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

i literally havent been outside for 2 days

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

be petty aka yesterday i changed my twitter icon from jae 2 brian bc jae’s being a child rn so hes out

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

when they ramble abt smth they like thanksk buds

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

is this the song from p!atd i have it in my playlist lmao oh i fucing hate this song i always skip it im not listening

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

idk what either of those are but bell and boxy

59: what’s your favorite myth?

idk any

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

anything that eunwoo has ever written

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

ive given eggs for karissa’s birthday b4 and i got a kermit its not stupid tho its just the closest thign i could think of

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

i drink water juice everyday every minute every hour

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

my books are all in shelves lads i just  heard the fucking keys rattle im not doing this shit im logging off night

ok day 3 and im back like i said previously my books are on shelves i tried rearranging them by series b4 but my housekeeper rearrnaged them randomly the next day so i gave up

i make playlists for songs that i like, really like (i still skip them sometimes rip) and songs that my friend recommends me i have a seperate playlist for the songs i like in japanese 2

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

light blue?? like its actually p white bc its cloudy

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

m not rly

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

just. leaves maybe??

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

Horror Movie

68: what’s winter like where you live?

oh winter is fucking fantastic it never gets colder than 25 degrees celsius here and if it does rain it lasts for like 10 minutes

69: what are your favorite board games?

i used to rly like snake and ladders and monopoly :-o

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

im not ready for that kinda death

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

english breakfast or earl gray??? those r like the standard right

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

ya but i never do bc i either forget to or am just 2 lazy

73: what are some of your worst habits?

being lazy + procrastinating :-D

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

okie :-o ..

they’re great ok ive talked abt them like 10 times in the span of 2 months but whatever folks

they’re super nice, kind and just all of the positive adjectives out there in the dictionary ...... they’ve helped me multiple times and they’re always there 2 lend me a listening ear (or in our case, eye lmao) idk??? im just super comfortable around them always and im honestly so thankful we became mutuals (and subsequently friends) last year!!!! i cant say a lot bc ill just get v repetitive but overall they’re an awesome friend and im glad we still communicate daily via twitter and sometimes our skype sessions even if they’re kinda awkward bc i never know when 2 talk bc im scared ill speak and theyll say smth and itll turn into a MESS which actually happened lmao  

im looking forward to the day our skype sessions become super smooth and easy going!!!

75: tell us about your pets!

i have none but id die for boxys cats

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

well yeah always tbh but its not smth i have to do but more like want to do im just 2 lazy to get around doing it

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

?? i almost said lemons arent pink but i Remembered...... yellow lemonade

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

i feel like this is an Attack? okay LISTEN so story time again.

on the flight back from japan i watched the alien covenant and i couldnt even get past the scene where the baby alien was gonna kill the poor guy who ended up being locked up with the infected dude as soon as i saw the blood and the alien emerge from the guy’s back i bolted lmao

so to calm myself down nd block that memory from my mind i went ahead and watched despicable me 3.. which HONESTLY im the worst critic ever but in my humble opinion.... the movie was good????????? idk i didnt watch minions the movie though i got lazy again whooopS!

anwyay i sidetracked but im neutral im not a fan but i wouldnt go out of my way to call minions annoying?? bc they really arent? i feel like its only seen that way bc of how people make posts abt how annoying minions are even tho.. they arent??

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

my memory hates me so every specific thing my friends have ever done for me has left my mind but .

the cutest thing? everything my friends do for me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

theyre yellow and no i didnt theyve been there ever since i could remember

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

lava cake

82: are/were you good in school?

yeah i was good in school for like the first three years and this year i just flopped so badly lmao and its my important year too oh well my exams r over and i still dont have a backup plan in mind

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

all of dance gavin dance’s albums have awesome art

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

back when i was really into 5sos i thought of getting a tally since that was their logo at that time but now no not really unless i decide to get lance’s face tattooed onto my forehead on impulse

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

im keeping up with hq, bnha and tg manga!!!!

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

idk what those r but sure

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

big hero 6

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

who wrote this whats up with these questions

i googled and.. not really?? they all look nice

89: are you close to your parents?

close enough to stand being in the same room as them but not close enough to want to initiate conversations

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.

tokyo was really cool (literally) and if i ever go again id love to go with friends so we can explore more??

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

japan was supposed to be the only plan for this year but my grandad passed away so i had to go to malaysia multiple times earlier this year ik this wasnt the qn but ive already went to the planned destination tm so

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

BARELY SPRINKLES A PINCH im anti cheese

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

um. like?? i tie the sides of my hair that cover my face back??? bc i dont like hair in my face

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

bell

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

hopefully something useful

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

i also click remind me tomorrow lmao

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

infp-t, capricorn, hufflepuff (same as falen nd jen yay)

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

uh ive never been hiking and i dont plan on it sorry body

99: list some five (or id never shut up) songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

currently......

when you love someone - day6

like we used to - the rose

crazy sexy cool - astro

death of a strawberry - dance gavin dance

if it means a lot to you - a day to remember

idk if these actually “resonate to my soul” they just sound nice

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

oh worm.. i wouldnt miind either???

i know i have 2 choose but like

if i go back into the past i could be less annoying?? but the past has actually helped me be the way i am today and i think im learning to be a better person?? im definitely way better than how i was previously 5 years ago and im just grateful i was able to learn from my mistakes???

so i wouldnt go back to the past.

if its in the future i can see how ill end up and if its not good i might end up being able to change myself so i dont get my “bad end”..???? maybe or i can just see what happens in the future and i can look forward to it

itll also give me a chnace to have the most fun while i can if its not too nice

so my decision is to go to the future

thank you so much for asking falen god this got so long lmao

[cyjprojectarchive]

blurry | bambam

prompt: inspired by bammie’s instagram selfie hot dayum could i not contain myself, so i made an imagine abt it B) here it is if ya wanna get attacked by our bamchinja. c;  group: GOT7 pairing: bambam, you genre: fluff words: 3185 note:  sorry theres so many spelling errors its currently 3:18 am and im tired as heq ill edit this tomorrow thanku ㅠㅠ

“Dude, you got this.”

“Yeah, well, what if I don’t? Our asses are on the line here,” Bambam’s worried tone reverberates from your phone’s speakers. You have it on loudspeaker mode because you were in the mood for some mint chocolate ice cream. You just got home from classes today and boy was it scorching hot outside. 

“Yes, you do. And no, they’re not. You’ve been practicing nonstop for this comeback, Bam, I think you have it all down by now,” you repeat a little louder than usual as you open the freezer and take out the pint of sweet and cooling treat. 

Setting it down on the kitchen counter, you cap the lid off and start digging in with your spoon. “And why are you so nervous? You’ve never asked me advice on how to handle stage fright ever since we knew each other,” you comment through the melting of your favorite dessert inside your mouth.

“Are you eating ice cream from the pint again?” He suddenly asks, a tone of amusement lingering in his voice. You automatically hug the thing of ice cream closer to your stomach, eyes peering at the phone resting near you. “How’d you know?”

“Just a hunch.” You can just hear him shrugging smugly.

“You wish you were here,” you retaliate, scoffing as you take another scoop. You make sure he captures the sound of you scraping the soft and gooey substance of sweetness. You know you should be encouraging him right now, but teasing the boy you’ve known for quite a while now is always a treat in its own way. 

“I do. I do wish I were there,” he agrees somewhat seriously. You’re unsure whether he was talking about having ice cream or something else, but you brush it off, not wanting to think about such complications right now. 

You put the spoon down and attempt to bring the previous conversation back. “Really, though, Bam. You’re going to do amazing, as always. Don’t worry too much about it, alright?” You tell him earnestly. If Bambam had never asked for any reassurances with you before, maybe this time he really needed it. 

A slight pause occupies the air until you hear him exhale shortly on the other end of the phone call. “You’re right, you’re right. That makes me feel so much better. Thanks, fam,” he answers with a hopeful tone. 

Shaking your head, you protest, “No problem. And don’t ever call me ‘fam’ again, fam.”

“Would you like to be called something else then, hmm?” There he goes, back to his usual zany self which you can’t help but blush about…

Did Bambam just make you blush? 

“I would like you to call me when I’m not busy enjoying my ice cream,” you tell him, going back to eating your lunch for the day. 

“You didn’t even start eating ice cream when I called you in the first place!” Bambam interjects and you soon chuckle at his predicament. You hear a few conversations bubbling up in the background, even recognizing Yugyeom’s whining to one of the hyungs, maybe Jinyoung, you’re not quite sure.

You move your position to the couch, setting down your phone on the coffee table. You hear a distinct voice referring to Bambam and he responds, but you’re too focused on your ice cream to eavesdrop. 

“I have to go in a few. What’re you going to do afterwards?” He finally addresses you. You ponder his question until you realize you’ve forgotten something really important. 

“Shoot! I have a major presentation for my History class tomorrow!” Spoon hanging in midair, you slowly place the ice cream pint next to your phone, feeling guilty of even opening it up. 

“And you haven’t started on it yet,” Bambam muses. You groan in agreement and slap your forehead lightly. “No, because I thought it was happening next week.”

“Too distracted with me, huh. I have that effect,” the boy on the other end suggests, a smirk almost evident in his voice. You laugh mockingly, but the anxiety in you keeps rising. “Guess I have something to keep me distracted while you’re performing,” you conclude, probably feeding his ego even more. 

“That’s good, then, at least it’s not another guy,” he jokes and you roll your eyes. “Whatever, snake,” you shoot back. 

“Anyway, I got to go, we’re shooting in a few,” he tells you, almost begrudgingly. “Hey, I really appreciate you answering the call.”

You smile at his genuine reply. You rarely see this side of Bambam whenever you guys are together, or even just talking on the phone. You feel a sense of warmth in your heart, and you honestly don’t know what to make out of it. But you don’t let it get to you- not yet.

“Of course. You know I’m here,” you mutter softly. 

“And me too,” he chimes. Another voice, presumably Jaebum, informs him about getting ready, so you anticipate Bambam’s good bye. “Now I really need to go. I’ll message as soon as possible.”

“For sure, Bam. Good luck! You never fail to do your best,” you add, making sure he’s still reassured. Bambam thanks you again, and the call ends.

Now, onto cramming that damned History presentation.

Adding a few finishing touches here and there, you finally have a decent 10-slide presentation for your class tomorrow morning. Stretching your arms upward, you let out a relieved sigh, yawning in the process. Making sure that the file has been saved to your laptop, Google Drive, and USB, you turn your laptop off and trudge your way into the comfort of your bed. 

The digital clock on your nightstand reads 11:24 pm and you feel quite proud for completing a procrastinated project before the day ends, roughly speaking. You ease your way into the duvet, grabbing your phone to the side for a late night session on a few of your social media accounts. 

You go to your Messages and remember Bambam’s call from earlier. You wonder whether the performance was a success- it probably was, and Bambam just had cold feet, but you already texted him two hours ago complaining about History being your worst subject ever and how lucky you are it’s your first class of the day. You type a new text, informing him of your success nonetheless and hoping he had a fun time today as well. 

Before you can hit the send button, a chat bubble appears on Bambam’s end first. Your eyes widen at the screen and your lips part in surprise. 

“What the…” You utter under your breath, hands suddenly sweating at the sight of your phone, Bambam’s selfie showing on the bright screen. You squint your eyes to confirm what you’re seeing is right. 

You hit backspace on your keyboard and type a new message with quick and shaking thumbs. 

Wrong number, headass. 

He reads it immediately and your heart skips a beat. Your eyes cannot seem to focus on anything else other than the blurry selfie of a jet black haired K-pop idol. You find yourself mesmerized at his cerulean contacts and drawn to the straight and full pink lips. Breath hitching, you mentally urge yourself to stop giving in to your thoughts. 

Undeniably, Bambam broke every puberty challenge out there, and not a day goes by without you reminding him that- much to his satisfaction. But you complimenting him was always out of good faith as good friends, nothing more and nothing less. 

However, recently, things have been a bit blurry between the two of you. It doesn’t help that his constant teasing makes you more conscious of the type of relationship you guys are slowly developing. 

And this selfie isn’t helping.

lmao what do you mean that is supposed to be sent to my best friend

You share a room with Yugyeom. Just show it to him in person lmao

not himmm, my OTHER best friend. u. anyway, like what u see? ;)

WTF are you talking about, you never send me selfies before??? 

aww is it that bad, b? :,( it’s just a lil smth to motivate u with ur presentation. hows that going for u, btw?

Again, with the weird ass nicknames, Bam lmao? And you’re just a few minutes too late bec I’ve finished, but thanks for trying.

Also, no, it actually looks really good. :)

pshhh u like itttt bb ;) oh, hey thats great. u should go 2 sleep by now.

and really? don’t play me, bb :,(

It does! Your face is blurred, so it’s perfect.

wow bye

You chuckle to yourself at the playful conversation. Typical Bambam, but you still can’t help but be confused at any underlying message of all this. Or maybe there’s not any and your mind is just running irrationally due from the emerging crash of the caffeine. Maybe that’s it.

You think of sending him a meme- of himself, might you add- until he follows a new text. 

blurred like our relationship, right

Dropping your phone to the side, you bring a pillow pushed to your face and scream into its plush surface. You feel the heat coming off of your cheeks, chest heaving in and out as well. What was that all about? Has Bambam been aware of the unusual tension you, yourself, have been feeling towards him the past couple of weeks? Why is he speaking up about it now?

that was stepping out of the line of being corny. i’m sorry lol

You notice that he was trying to play it off cool, but now that you’ve gotten a signal from him acknowledging the uncanny stage of your relationship right now, you wanted to go all out. With Bambam, you need to know whether he’s serious about this or not. 

You retreat the pilow away from your face, flustered at the suddent flight response you just pulled off. You certainly cannot be this embarrassing once you confront him, that’s for sure. But realizing you might have been absent for a while, you gingerly take a hold of your phone and type a new message with a plan. 

When are you free, Bam? 

You need to discuss this to him in person. You need to see it in Bambam’s eyes. You see the typing animation show on and off as he’s probably contemplating on what to say to you too.

i’m free for a few hours after our morning radio interview

Perfect. I’ll meet you at the cafe near my university at 12. Sounds good?

yeah yeah ofc 

Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, Bam.

you too. uhhh good night?

Good night to you too, Bambam. :)

“Headass, over here!”

A guy in stylish clothing, together with a black cap, black sunglasses, and black mask whips his head towards your direction. His tall stance and sense of fashion already singled him out from the lazily dressed college students surrounding the cafe right now, including yourself.

You end up sleeping three hours later after your conversation with Bambam, different scenarios of your meet up today forming in your head, some with good outcomes and others unspeakable. You couldn’t believe that you were able to set up a “date” with him with the intention of confessing the uncertainty you have in regards to affectionate feelings towards him. 

He walks over to the corner of the quaint little shop, a cold drink already in place before his seat. You don’t see his expression quite well, seeing that his whole face is covered with different kinds of masks, but you hear him chuckle as he relaxes in front of you, inspecting the drink shortly. 

“You know me too well,” he finally says, lowering the mask to his chin so he can take a sip of his favorite drink. You grin at your accomplishment, chugging the iced coffee you bought for yourself as to keep your nerves from taking over you- which was ironic since you’re gulping down more of what keeps you shaking right now.

“How was the interview?” You ask nonchalantly, watching his every move. Bambam glances up at you and nods his head, “It went really well. More enjoyable than your presentation, that I could say.”

Glaring daggers at him you counter, “Shut up.” He cackles at your response, and then the two of you instinctively easing into your normal conversations of mundane stories and brutal banters, almost forgetting about the original reason of you meeting him here.

But you didn’t mind, not one bit. You missed his physical presence. Just seeing a hint of his crinkling eyes from the shade of his visor is enough for you to feel comfortable around Bambam. He genuinely is the best person you know. You both never have to think twice about saying something potentially wrong, because the other would just use it at their advantage but at the same time turn it into an inside joke between the two of you. 

There was something that he declared which made you stomp your hand down the table in rejection. He chortles at your dramatic expression and casually lays his hand on top of yours. Your face quickly realizes this as you retrieve your hand back to your sides, squeezing it tight to stop it from trembling at the sudden contact. 

Bambam notices your discomfort and coughs awkwardly. “Sorry, sorry. I ruined it, didn’t I?” He admits, looking down in frustration.

“No, no, Bam it’s not that,” your attempt in fixing the matter at hand was futile, and you wish you have more time to stall, more time to just have mindless fun with the best guy friend you’ve ever had in a while. 

But seeing that your stomach churned and jumped in itself after a simple touch of your hand, you had to tell him how he’s made you feel. Or else you’re going to go nuts.

“What are we, Bambam?” You blurt out, eyes fixating on the empty cup of beverage sitting idly on the table. “And don’t make it out as a meme, ‘kay? I’m asking it seriously,” you follow up with a scrunched face, making sure that Bambam knows you’re done with fooling around. 

You peek at his face and he seems to be smiling shyly, hand that was once touching yours now scratching the back of his head. You find yourself wishing you never took it back. 

Shaking your head, you whine at your inner frustration. “I… I think I like you, Bam. And I don’t know why I’m saying this now but recently, you’ve been saying weird stuff to me that gets me all flustered and red and you can’t see that because we haven’t seen each other in a while, but when we do I try to suppress it just because I don’t you to think I’m weird or something like that but our conversation last night messed me up big time, and now I don’t know if suppressing it is going to help anymore and I just -”

You stop yourself from losing air in your system as you inhale and exhale. Your hands have been clutching themselves tightly on your lap and you let go to feel the blood pumping again. You’re afraid to look up and see a confused Bambam staring at you, but before you can contemplate any further, you hear a soft laughter resonating from him. And it wasn’t that of mockery, so you slowly turn your head to reveal a blushing adolescent boy before you, hands covering his eyes under a pair of expensive sunglasses.

 “Aw man, you beat me to it. Why do you always do that to me?” He complains cutely. You titl your head in confusion. 

“I was supposed to confess first. Do you know how ashamed I feel right now?” He takes his hands off his eyes as well as his sunglasses and you finally see his eyes. Glistening in hope and anxiety all at the same time, but the beauty in them never left. You are taken aback, but you try and keep it together as he gulps down and stares right back at you. 

“You always beat me to things, but that doesn’t mean I won’t confess anymore. Yes, I’ve been trying to get your attention more frequently because I’ve… developed feelings for you, and I didn’t know how to handle them other than be more annoying than usual.” His assessment of the situation makes you giggle, and it prompted him to keep going. 

“I was really happy I got to talk to you when I was feeling hella nervous yesterday. It made me confirm my feelings for you and that you make me comfortable in whatever situation we’re in. The selfie I sent you last night was just me trying to see if you kind of feel the same way, and I honestly didn’t know what to expect from there.” He brings his hands on the table and plays with them mindlessly, biting his lip as he looks down. 

“I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel frustrated by the way I’ve acted, I’m just a dumb adolescent boy who doesn’t know how to handle his feelings well. But I was honestly really glad we got to hang out today, you know I missed you a lot. So, I’m sorry if this ruins everything…” he trails off, seeming to want to say more but his tongue prevents him from doing so.

You keep your eyes on him, not exactly knowing how to respond correctly. He gives you a full minute to contemplate on your own before he looks back up at you, pausing with his hands and smiling sheepishly. “Any response from you would be great right now.”

“Shoot, I’m sorry,” you say, lips in a tight line. You think for another few seconds before finally making up your mind. “C’mon, let’s take a selfie.”

“W-what?”

“C’mon, Bam. You have a better camera than mine, so go get your phone!” Your tone was firm but encouraging at the same time. He hesitates for a second but complies nonetheless. You scoot next to him, your arm slightly touching with his. You falter a bit, but you feel Bambam relax with your touch and you smile as you move in a tiny bit closer.

He positions the phone at the perfect angle and you see him trying out a few different expression before his thumb presses over the button. Your smile grows wider at the sight of him assessing himself, but you quickly peck the soft surface of his cheek and beat him to taking the selfie. 

Without waiting for his response, you snatch the phone away and inspect the picture. Content with the image, you show him the screen. 

He looks at with his eyebrows furrowed, but immediately understands and reveals a goofy grin. You nudge his elbow playfully before resting your head on your shoulder, already feeling at ease with your position.

“Not so blurry now, huh?” You ask him. He pats your head in response and squeezes your shoulder reassuringly, the touch of him making you want more.

 But for now, this is enough.