#and the side experience in that game that i’d hate to let them go (the choice system wouldn’t lose much imo it’s pretty minimal. But still)
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image id: A tweet by InsaneLetterbox reading "You have an Avatar-sized budget to adapt ONE video game into a movie. What game are you adapting?". end id.
yoinking this from twitter cause i want to hear yalls opinions!
#i’m stealing someone else’s id instead of robing that post because i need to say. prev i would watch that so much oh my GOD i can see it#also i’ve been thinking about this since i saw it first and i CANNOT figure out an answer.#rdr2 is fairly cinematic and already references the cowboy film genre but i have such an attachment to the open world#and the side experience in that game that i’d hate to let them go (the choice system wouldn’t lose much imo it’s pretty minimal. But still)#i love firewatch and it would make a gorgeous movie but something about it just wouldn’t translate idk. you have to be a part of it yk??#prey 2017 is a good candidate i think#you also wouldn’t lose much w out the choice system and using cinematography to emphasize that sort of reality/illusion theme would be fun#but also. i could make a d1 vanilla plotline movie work. i know that game is incomprehensible but just trust me.#i’m taking the fps out of the fps game and mostly focusing on environment/worldbuilding and making it more a western#im pulling in the later garden doppelgängers and having the last scene be stalkeresque conversation w yourself about the nature of light#im doing sweeping wide shots of mars. Treut me man.#i could also do beyond light bc eramis as a dramatic antagonist w grey morality instead of a boss monster would be. ooo it would be so good#sorry for the long asstags. i love video games yum
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I can't believe that I almost missed Sky's aniversary!!! happpy twelvth birthday to skyward sword! <3 I'd just like to say thank you to @yourlocaltreesimp for reblogging something that reminded me that today is the boys birthday - this peice is all because of them I wrote it in 40 mins so sky could have something for his bd before the date changes It's a continuation on my self aware sky fic with some headcanons and a small drabble under the cut about how the both of you celebrate his birthday <3
[masterlist]
✦ After about a month and a half of being with you, the both of you are quite used to living together. With Sky getting a grip on how to handle being a real flesh and blood person now - the both of you have even started on getting paperwork sorted for him to be recognised as a real person even if he’s never seen apart from your side
✦ The past few days though he’s had this energy around him, like a little kid excited for their - oh that's right, you’d almost forgotten the anniversary of his game was coming up. No wonder why he’d be so excited about it.
✦ In the time it’s taken you to realise the date he’s taken his chance to be a little more clingy, you can blame nostalgia for him wanting to be closer. The feeling of the day he was created making him come to terms with just how lucky he was to be standing right next to you - his saviour lover.
✦ If you were to do anything for him, say buy him gifts, treat him to an expensive meal, take him for a date, set aside the day for him or heck even spend the morning in bed cuddling with him? He’d fall for you all over just being flattered to the core over how much you care about him, if there was even a sliver of a chance of him loosing his possessive tendencies before that chance is shattered beyond repair now. You’re his and he’s never letting go.
✦ with how nostalgic he’s gotten, it’s not all that much of a surprise that he’s asked if he can play through the game on his own, with you sitting right next to him naturally
“Are you sure about this Link? I mean I’ve not touched it since you well, since you crawled out. Who’s to say that he won’t figure it out as well?”
“It should be fine, what would be the odds of it happening twice? Besides if it does I’d bet he’ll feel the same way my dove.”
He’s not certain which is as clear as day, of course he doesn’t have a clue what could happen if he plays. What would happen if the version of himself he plays as hates him more than anything? If he gets jealous? If he tries to bring him back? Link hasn’t considered any of that, not that I can hold it against him. After that first day out of the game he’s mellowed out so much, it really was his desperation that made him terrifying - not that that doesn’t slip out every now and then of course. If he really wants to play? We’ll deal with the consequences of it together.
“If you’re really sure then love, want me to grab some snacks while you set up the switch?”
“I’d love that, thank you, darling.”
A soft kiss to my cheek is all that I need to become a blushing mess as he moves to turn everything on, including the new tv I had to buy after he shattered the old one, not too expensive but still more of a hassle than I wanted to have to deal with. Seeing as he’s never had any previous experience with any technology like this he’s picked it up like a natural, so in no time at all we’re back to sitting together on my couch to play. It’s nice like this, all gentle and domestic. If you didn’t know Link wasn’t originally a ‘real’ person you wouldn’t even be able to tell, he fits in like he was always supposed to be here with me. The clothes he’s nicked only adding onto that feeling of belonging like he’s just any other boyfriend stealing his partner's clothes.
“Guess now is the moment of truth to whether or not I’ll be dealing with another nuisance stealing my heart then.”
“I wouldn’t let him take your heart, that belongs to me and only me.”
“Alright then, are you gonna make a save then my lovable anomaly or are you just gonna threaten someone you’re not sure even exists?”
“I’m making it my dearest player, I just had to make sure you were fully certain of where I stand.”
True to his word, he did make a save file - although he did name it something different than his own name - not before kissing me yet again though. Playing it with him was nice, seeing his reactions to his past where he didn’t have to get traumatised? It’s one of the sweetest things I've seen in a long while. It did seem I was right though, he didn’t manage to get to demise before we had a shocked link staring at the both of us like his world had been ripped apart. His reaction was so different to my link’s though.
He’s petrified.
“Wh- What’s going on - who are you both – wh- wh-” … “And why do you look just like me?”
#linked universe x reader#yandere linked universe x reader#yandere linked universe#link x reader#lu sky#self aware au#self aware lu#moss✦writes
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Hellooo!<3 I
So I was hoping if maybe I could get some head cannons of Bi-Han having a s/o who has ADHD, his s/o has medicine for their ADHD they just don’t take it simply out of spite. His s/o could be found being bored by like almost everything, but the second you give his s/o for example paint in a bag they will be quiet for hours on end just messing and playing with it.
Is this accurate to the adhd experience? Probably not. Did I claim it would? Nope, I didn’t guarantee anything as i don’t know how adhd actually works. So take this with an EXTREME grain of salt cuz most of the info comes from the nhs website. 🦦
Ooc Bi-Han? None of this fitting his character? Probably so but I’m too tired to even care. 🦦
Bi-Han was made well aware that you hated taking your meds and would even straight up act coy when the topic on whether or not you had taken your meds came up. So much so that he’d probably see to it that you do take your medication on time but seeing as he was Grandmaster, he’s not granted the time to monitor your medication, seeing as how you often refuse to take it out of spite. (Not babying. Never babying, your a grown ass adult.)
So he’s grown use to seeing you lying on the floor, staring up at the ceiling in pure boredom, feeling every single second that painfully passed you by that even minutes felt like hours and hours felt like days to you with how fucking bored out of your mind you were. Nothing you did held your attention long enough to satisfy that part of your brain, not the games on your phone that you lost interest in second after downloading, not reading as you could barely get past the prologue never less the first chapter; not even the toys that you purposefully bought for this exact reason got couldn’t satiate your brain.
On a side note who reads prologues anyway? I know I don’t cuz I’d rather get straight into it.
You were so fucking bored that even saying that that you were bored was becoming boring in of itself. But Bi-Han knew of your one weakness; paint in a bag. An even bigger weakness of yours would be if the bag contained two or more different colours that make an entirely new colour when messed with enough.
Or even the kind where you get to choose how many colours you want to put in the bag and go fucking apeshit with it to your hearts content. For the physical changing of the colours were both equally fascinating and captivating that you could go at it for hours on end and not grown bored.
Bi-Han accommodates you however he can, changing up when needed and when you’ve grown tired of certain things that once held your interest. He knows he can be a dick sometimes but never when his beloved is in need to help them throughout the day. So when he had given the bag of paint, you were immediately zoned in moulding the colours together and spreading the paint as far into the corners as you possibly could, and all without an word passing from your lips as your brows furrowed in concentration like you were making a masterpiece.
Anyways, Bi-Han is well aware of your inability to finish a task, so naturally what you put down to pursue other tasks, he picks up and finishes for you. He’s your calm and he would never hold anything against you…unless it actively puts you in danger then that’s an entirely different thing entirely.
He’s also the person who seemingly knows where everything you put is and so whenever you ask for the whereabouts of your keys, your shoes, socks, whatever. Bi-Han would always direct you as to where they are or just keep ahold of them until you inevitably ask and you press a kiss to his cheek in gratitude.
During situations where you’re in deep stress or in need of an outlet, he’ll get you your paint in a bag to help you destress and let out any frustrations your had onto mushing the paint together forcefully. If it helps you during times of boredom then he believes that it will also help you in times of stress and discomfort.
You and Bi-Han were so different from one another that you just work well together, you honestly had no clue where you’d be without Bi-Han being the more levelheaded of the two of you in certain stimuli and being a massive help with your frequent bouts of boredom, your inability of prioritisation, and everything else your ADHD came along with.
He withheld an extreme amount of patience, probably from all the training he’s done his entire life and the lessons he’s learn from them about timing and all that. So when you interrupt him, he just lets you speak your entirety without making you feel like shit about it; but to Bi-Han if you wanted to speak, then he’ll let you speak and listen to you fully to everything you said.
Everyone wants to be listens to right?
Bi-Han would also probably act as your personal reminder, writing down or verbally telling you things that you had clearly forgotten that you were doing some days, whether that be appointments if, you have them, hangouts with friends, date plans, etc. you found it fascinating how he could remember so many dates, times, events and other things you’ve agreed to in the past as you’d naturally forget; or if ever on the off chance you do remember but just come extremely late or on the wrong day.
Bi-Han is use to lonesome and monochrome cold silences but when you entered his life, it was like he could see, taste and feel the colour of life warning his ice cold heart. He wasn’t use to it but overtime he found himself not wanting to go back to the life he lived before you, not realising how desperate for company he was until he was devoid of it.
Will he admit it to you though? No, he’s got a reputation to uphold after all but that don’t he won’t shows he cares in other ways.
Ignore if you don’t agree; Things that I’d like to think are in the same vein as paint in a bag or things that would defiantly hold me up for a good while:
Lava lamps
Liquid floor tiles
Water filled stress tube toys (especially the bigger ones that have like glitter and all sorts in them. I want one now. :( )
Pens that have the liquid stuff in them. (we all know your not buying them cuz they’re pens but for the entertainment value that the liquid gives. I should know cuz I use to have a lot of them as a kid. My go to pen for obvious reasons.)
#mk x you#mk imagine#mk imagines#mk x reader#mk x y/n#mortal kombat 1 x reader#mortal kombat x reader#mortal kombat imagine#mortal kombat imagines#bi han imagines#bi han imagine#bi han x reader#sub zero x reader
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Silk from their soul (25)
The Ghoul / Cooper Howard x f!reader [no use of y/n]
Rated: E (Cooper needs a primer on consent but it's all good, oral (m receiving), forced orgasms (literally)) Words: 2.4k Summary: Truths
Series Masterlist My Masterlist
Your feet hurt but you refuse to stop.
It’s been hours since you left Nero’s compound, hours of walking without interruption. Cooper’s still there, you can hear his boots on the ground, but he’s been uncharacteristically quiet.
Good. You’ve got a lot to think about.
Your hands had been steady when you’d ended Galen’s life - but now your whole body seemed to be vibrating. Adrenalin? Shock? It was anybody’s guess, all you knew was that your heart was beating so hard you felt you might burst.
He was dead.
No more experiments. No more games. No more watching women who looked just like you being sold off to the highest bidder.
No more.
You don’t know what you’re supposed to do.
Oh, you know where you’re going. There’s unfinished business to be taken care of. But after that… well, it was complicated now.
“Hate to interrupt a snit, sweetheart, but where exactly are we headed to?”
You don’t falter your stride when you answer, “The facility.”
“The facility,” he hums thoughtfully. “The one that made you?”
“Yes.”
“We gonna find any trouble when we get there?”
You pause and he catches up, looking at you from under the brim of his hat. “Maybe? I don’t think so though. Unless Galen removed me from the security systems.”
“Robots? Lasers? Automated mech suits?”
You give him a rueful look, “Yes.”
“Sounds like a party.”
A snort of laughter bubbles up and you see his grin turn into a warm smile. “You ready to stop for the day or you gonna march that pretty ass all the way there?”
Looking around you spot a partially collapsed building in the distance, “We can stop I guess.”
“Good, ‘cause I got an inkling we need to talk.”
Well shit.
The building is concrete so most of it survived whatever happened in these parts. There’s a wall with a gaping hole, but that looks like it was a roll up door someone has stolen for scrap. Cooper crouches once you’re inside, digging in his pack and eyeing the ground for kindling.
“I’ll get some stuff for the fire,” you offer quickly.
“That’s not necessary, you’re tuckered out. Have a seat.”
“No really I-”
“Sit.”
You do immediately, legs folding under you and hitting the ground with a soft oomph. Cooper eyes you thoughtfully.
“Take your pack off.”
You shrug out of it, setting it to the side and giving him a wary look. He purses his lips and then you see a mischievous light enter his eyes.
“Come.”
The word has many meanings but his tone leaves no doubt which one he intends. Your eyes roll back as the pleasure washes over you. You barely notice when you fall backwards, hitting your head on a small rock but you don’t care. You call his name and suddenly he’s there, leaning over you, his face centimeters from your own.
“Well I’ll be,” he grins down at you, “can’t say that won’t come in handy.”
Your breaths are still shuddering pants when you manage to open your eyes fully, his face coming into focus. He flinches at the fear in them and immediately sits back on his heels.
“Don’t look at me like I’m a monster, darlin’, there’s a host of worse things I could have told you to do.”
You shift away from him, sitting up so you can look him straight on. “And will you?”
His face falls at the question and he bites off a curse. “Sit there and let me fix us some supper, we need to have a talk.” A second later he adds, “That’s not an order.”
The constriction in your chest relaxes and you watch him work, getting the fire going and spearing a couple of pieces of meat to roast. He opens a can of beans and offers it to you and you accept, still side-eyeing him.
“So I reckon you and I need to have a discussion,” he says carefully, “about what precisely is going on here between you and I.”
“I think you figured it out.” You’re sulking, and you know it shows in your tone.
“Maybe I have, but I’d like to hear it from the horse’s mouth, as it were.”
“My sisters and I, we were made to be the perfect partner. Beautiful, loyal, obedient… once we’ve imprinted that’s it.”
“And you’ve ‘imprinted’ on me?” You nod and he cocks his head, “When we kissed, I reckon?”
Another nod, “It’s not as simple as touching mouths, there has to be a… connection I guess? But it’s not hard to get someone to slip, to respond for just a moment.”
“And is that what it was?” He looks hurt. “Just a moment?”
“No, I knew… I knew I didn’t have a choice. If I didn’t want it to be Nero it had to be someone else.”
Cooper huffs a short laugh, “And you got stuck with me.” Before you can say anything he pokes a stick in the fire, glaring into it and saying, “Well I won’t make you stick around. Ain’t got no use for a hanger-on anyway.”
You know he’s lashing out but it still hurts. “I don’t have a choice, if we’re apart too long I’ll… I guess wither is the right word. Eventually I’ll die.”
His eyes shoot to yours. “Loyal, eh?”
“The perfect partner.” You stare at your hands, turning the can to avoid looking at him. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Shoot.”
“Why didn’t you take me in when you found me? You were after the bounty, why’d we go so far out of the way?”
He’s quiet now too, the only sound a distant animal howling. Eventually he sighs. “That was the plan, alright, but then… I dunno. Things changed.”
“Changed how?”
“You did, sweetheart.” With one hand he sweeps his hat off, setting it on the ground near him and pulling his gloves to lay near it. “You acted like I was a still a man and I… well I can’t say I didn’t like it.” You purse your lips, waiting, and after another long pause he continues. “What do you want me to say? I got a soft spot for ya.”
“I seem to remember being drugged and tied up not too long ago,” you point out.
“Well, that was after you ran away from me,” he returns with sardonic look. “Can’t fault a fella for getting a bug up his ass.”
You try to hide you laugh but it slips through and he gives you an answering smile.
“So,” you say, “if I hadn’t run…”
“Wouldn’t have had to chase you down.”
He makes it sound so reasonable. “And we… I mean, would there have been a we, an us even?”
“The thought did cross my mind.”
You sigh. “Maybe I should have talked to you. I just… I saw the poster and I got so scared.”
“Don’t blame ya. Hell, felt like I was carrying a damn grenade in my pack the whole time.”
“Why didn’t you get rid of it?”
He pauses, frowning at the fire. “Didn’t occur to me.”
You let the silence settle again, feeling out your own emotions and letting him do the same. For a moment it feels like you’re back in that small bunk, the night he’d told you his real name and held you like you were precious.
“Cooper?” He startles at the sound of his name, eyes flying to yours. “I like you. I probably shouldn’t, given everything that’s happened, but I do. And if I had to imprint on someone, I’m glad it’s you.”
“You sure about that sweetheart?” he asks, hesitation wreathing every syllable. “I can’t say I’m a good man, barely even a man anymore. And knowing you gotta do anything I say… it gives a fella ideas.”
You stare at the small fire. “Would you tell me to hurt myself?”
He seems genuinely shocked by the question. “Of course not.”
“Tell me to fuck other men?”
His face gets downright scary as he snarls, “No one else is touching you.”
“It’s terrifying,” you admit, “just knowing that you could tell me to do anything and I would have to do it. I feel it here, in my chest, I can’t not. Even… even the theoretically good things. I’m worried.”
“You worried I’ll force you to do something you don’t want?”
“I’m worried you won’t even realize.”
You refuse to lift your eyes to see his reaction. It’s silent in the small room, save the crackling of the fire. After a long pause you hear a heavy sigh. “Get over-” he trips on the words and rephrases, “Will you come over here?”
A choice.
Giving him a wide smile you slide his direction, slipping under the arm he holds up and tucking yourself into his side. He offers you a skewer and you bite into the crisp flesh while he does the same.
“I ain’t ever made a woman do something she don’t want in bed, I ain’t about to start now.” He says after a moment. “How ‘bout this? I ever tell you to do something you don’t want you say barbed wire. That work for ya?”
It’s a safety hatch, of sorts, and requires a lot of trust. Still... you did trust him. Maybe it was idiotic but you trusted him with your life already… maybe you could trust him with your body too.
“Is that for all the time, or just… you know?”
He grins, settling his hand on your knee. “Well, I reckon you can use it just about whenever, but I gotta be honest I had some bedroom activities in mind that that little gift of your might prove useful for.”
God you love this playful side of him. “Oh? Like what?”
The hand moves to your thigh, sliding up and under the hem of your dress. “Well I’ve been thinking a few things. Things like, can I just tell you not to gag?”
A flush rips through your body and you’re immediately so turned on you can’t see straight. You’re still wet from your orgasm and you moan when his fingers press to the outside of your panties.
“You like that idea? I got a few more.” He pets you gently then twists the fabric away so he can press two fingers inside you. “Been wondering if I can order you to relax this pretty little ass and let me slide right in there. Maybe see how many times I can make you come in a row. Get my cock all the way down your throat and facefuck you til you got my cum dripping out of you.”
You nod, fingers gripping his wrist. “Yes.”
“Yes to which one, darling?” He’s leering down, his tongue startling pink against his rough lips. “I’m going to need you to be clear, I don’t want no repeats of a bit ago.”
“Can I-” a soft moan interrupts as he crooks his fingers inside you, “Can I suck on you?”
“Ah darlin’,” he purrs, “anytime you want.”
Hands pull at his belt, both yours and his, and he helps you maneuver between his legs. You hadn’t actually seen him before, and he’s as scarred here as he is everywhere else.
“Does it hurt?” You ask softly, running a finger down his length. He lets out a hiss between his teeth and you jerk your hand back. Just as quick his fingers grip your wrist and pull you back, encouraging you to wrap your fingers around him.
“You feel like silk, darlin’, why don’t you get that pretty mouth down here too?”
You kiss him in response, then lower your head to press a kiss to the tip of his cock. He grunts, one hand coming up to grip the back of your neck. You slide him between your lips, cradling him on your tongue as you bob your head forward. When he hits the back of your tongue you gag, pulling back slightly and blinking up at him.
“Ah darlin’.” He pets your cheek and then says sternly, “Don’t gag.”
You feel the compulsion shiver through you and you push forward once more, feeling him slip further with ease. When he hits your throat there’s a moment of discomfort but a quick, “Don’t choke neither,” from him smooths the way. Your nose presses to his stomach, your mouth full of his heat.
A rough groan rends the air and you glance up to see his head thrown back, his throat working. You suck softly and pull back, feel him slide along your tongue, then take him completely once more.
“I can see why you were worth so much to that fucker.” You let your teeth graze him and he grunts, meeting your glare with a lop-sided smile. “It was a compliment.”
You hum and pull back further, waiting until his hand catches your neck and he stops you.
“Now now, no need for that,” he chides, “why don’t you let me fuck this gorgeous mouth and when I say so we both come. That alright by you?”
A moan vibrates out of you and you lick around the head of his cock. He must take that as a yes because he interlocks his fingers behind your head and pushes forward until he’s deep in your throat once more. It feels strange, but there’s no discomfort. Just the hard length of him moving past your lips.
You love it.
You love hearing him groan and grunt. Hear his breathing speed up and his boots scrape on the floor. Feel his fingers dig into your skin.
“Can I come in your mouth?” he pants and you nod, your healing should take care of it and if not, there was always the Rad-Away. “Fuck,” he grits out, “fuck fuck-”
He’s so deep you almost don’t taste it, salty and burning hot in the back of your throat. It’s sour, but you don’t mind, you can’t get enough of how he holds you to him while he comes.
And then he remembers.
“Come for me.”
It’s instant. Relief and pleasure and sheer bliss rocketing through you. You suck on him harder and hear him curse, your own sharp cry muffled by the cock filling your mouth. He pushes you away, his hands on your shoulders and you blink up at him in a daze. With a sly grin he presses a thumb to your lower lip.
“Do it again.”
When you regain your sense of self - minutes, maybe hours later who even knows - he’s got his arms wrapped around you and a smug smile on his face.
“Now darlin’, I reckon we’re going to have a hell of a lot of fun with that.”
☢ ☢ ☢
For updates follow and turn on notifications for @brandyllyn-writes
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Hello there again! (●’◡’●)ノ I’m the anon that asked about Falin and wanted to thank you for your detailed explanation on her!! I knew she was a bit of creep from what Google translate told me (someday I’ll evolve to actually understanding jp) but not that much of one. Like geez, I knew Akuneko showed the ugliness of humanity but I didn’t think they’d go that far. >~< As much as I’d hate to say it, I’m a little sad she wasn’t utilized more as a sub-villain. Then again, I guess we’ll probably be seeing her in some flashbacks maybe (holding out hope) of elf man.
Speaking of elf man, I’m actually terrified of whatever Studio Wasabi is going to release late August (╥_╥). I really really hope they let Belen become a butler though but that brings up the question of who the other two butlers are gonna be. We haven’t had any hints about them but then again they did the same with Teddy and Hanamaru so who knows. Maybe they’ll all be some kind of fantasy related race? Or something akin to that assuming elf man is gonna be one of the four…ahhhh!! So many questions!! But please Studip Wasabi, let our butlers be happy I say!
Side note but if Belen really does become one of Aruji’s butlers then I hope he still has his cat ears
hii, I hope you’re doing well 💖! and thank you for the feedback \(//∇//)\!!
and yes! i second that sentiment wholeheartedly! see, none of the villains in aknk are written in a half-baked manner; if they are villains, they do more than enough to deserve their titles.
[unlike media, especially these days, that have villains that kill a man on screen to show how terrible they are, have little to no backstory, just a pretty face (so fans can spend money on them and romanticise them), aknk antagonists are not like that.
you end up hating them (because their crimes are truly inexcusable in every way possible), yet you can’t help being intrigued by them. ]
why was Falin so entranced with beauty that she kidnapped people that fit her criteria and sold them? what prompted this? it wasn’t love for money or material. not to mention, she grew up in an ordinary village. why did she become the way she is?
why was Fubuki so lost in his greed for power and wanting to get ahead of the Grobaner family? with him we can make guesses (unlike Falin) but it’s still not explained—we don’t know his childhood, whether he had authoritarian parents that forced him to be this way or an event that changed everything in his life. why did he want to create enhanced humans so badly that he was willing to experiment and kill children and in the end to find an alternative for the devil butlers with Grobaner family so he could get ahead of them?
anyway, you get the gist! all antagonists in this game are really interesting.
that’s I wanted both Fubuki and Falin’s past shown in detail so we could get to understand why they were the way they are! unfortunately, we won’t end up getting too much information about Falin; but Fubuki is alive and i don’t believe his story is over just yet.
[also, it’s so funny that both of them had met canonically and Falin had proposed to him but he rejected her 😭]
I’m also holding hope that when elf guy’s backstory gets explained, we will get information about Falin! since there are earlier survivors (her captives) who managed to escape; we might get their perspective.
there is no doubt in my mind that elf guy is getting playable; like i can already imagine his initial ssrs, his interaction with Aruji/us, how he’s going to be in Halloween event (if he gets playable by then?)
but with Belen, my heart is unsure 😭 I really want him to become playable. though if does become playable, studio wasabi will make sure to break our hearts with each update before making him playable.
I used to think that the writers of aknk add some soft content in the main story after each really sad/upsetting main story episodes. but um considering we got the stuff with Lato and then Boschi’s whole chapter right after, hehe I’m not so sure 😃
i think you have a good guess going with the next coming butlers (excluding elf guy) being from some fantasy race. we’re kinda slowly getting focus on the Western region, the one governed by the green-haired elf looking guy, Elboa.
considering the last two chapters were focused on and in East (Falin and Fubuki both being from East), it shouldn’t be unlikely that with subtle focus on the West in chapter 4, that we will be delving in it in the coming chapters.
so to spice things up, the writers might add non-humans to our long list of butlers ✨! I hope they do, it will make things interesting since we’ll get a focus on the respective regions the fantasy-races are from, how different they are from humans and so on!
[bestie, with all love, i don’t think those cat ears are staying 😭💗 i want them to stay too! because it gives Belen this distinctive appearance from the rest and with how much we’ve seen him with them, the cat ears should be a part of him. but he didn’t have them before his demon took over him.]
and i kinda did some research on Belen’s demon, Beleth, and he has a cat-like appearance.
so i think Belen might have Miyaji’s case going with him. where he’ll get those cat ears and tail wherever MC/Aruji summons his demon for him or wherever he is under the control of his demon (that’s happening now.). otherwise, he’ll have his normal appearance since he is human. that’s totally my guess though.
but it’s entirely possible that his cat ears might stay when he wakes up later because he had them for so long and all (?)
the other butlers don’t have their features change under the influence of their demons (besides having a red hue surrounding their one eye and the black hue surrounding them) or when Aruji summons their demon for them besides Miyaji. with Miyaji, later during his arc, when he loses control to his demon, he’ll also have his animal ears too (i think at least!)
but i can’t wait for Belen! he’s going to be so adorable (๑>◡<๑)!
with elf guy (god, if i have to call him elf guy one more time, I’ll —) I do have a gist of how he’ll be like. but with Belen, while we do have flashbacks that show his personality, I’m not sure that’s exactly how he’ll be like when he wakes up.
he’s been sleeping for 2000+ years in this state where his demon has full control over him (and we do know demons try to weaken the butlers by showing them nightmares or showing them good dreams so they can lose their grip on reality and yield to their demon). so when Belen wakes up, he’s going to have gone through hell 😭 so I think he won’t exactly be the cute, reliable person he was before his demon took control of him.
i think he might even have problem with communicating, even basic tasks like eating and walking to a certain extent at least. he hasn’t performed them in 2000+ years. yes, he was frozen in time but they should show some signs of having trouble with his daily tasks etc (please studio wasabi, I’m begging you 🥺)
that would make for some very interesting content too! from being the reliable older-brother-figure to now having trouble with everything and relying on people around you. I hope after his case is wrapped up (he’s woken up and all) we get some focus on his life in the devil’s palace and his interaction with everyone (like a 5.5 chapter?).
[i forgot to add; i also don’t understand Japanese, in case if I’m giving the impression that i do! i understand it like at an N5 level but i studied it at home. that’s why i hope i don’t give the impression that my explanations have no chance of being wrong somewhere; i rely on deepl and other tools like that too 😭 i hope we both end up learning it completely someday somewhere in the future…]
anyway, it was lovely talking to you, anon (*≧∀≦*)💞!! i can’t wait for the next update (and I’ll talk everyone’s ears off on tumblr) so let me know your thoughts when you get around to reading it ✨! i might post an explanation of the updates for people who don’t have the time to read the main story update.
i am manifesting those cat-ears on Belen 😀 and for him to become a butler; if they don’t, we’re going to raid studio wasabi’s headquarters by dawn ✨/j and i need more content about Falin! in elf guy’s content, we better get information about her.
have a wonderful day, anon (*^▽^*)💖! looking forward to your thoughts on the main story (whenever it drops!)
#sol’s asks#🍀 anon!#edited it!#studio wasabi please give elf guy a name already 😭#i also saw some Japanese fans refer to him as elf and elf man 😭🤣#like it’s not that hard to drop his name#i hope it’s something unique and cool
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I forgot that I never posted my P5R ramblings so here they are:
Socra’s Random Ass P5R Thoughts:
-I got emotionally attached to Ryuji and then Ann and then Yusuke and I refused to swap any of them out of my party throughout the entire game and it annoyed my brother (who was presiding over my playthrough) to no end
-(this also made the Okumura boss fight really annoying for me)
-Ryuji and Ann are my kids. My sillies. My beloveds.
-my brother and I referred to Kamoshida’s boss fight as “castrating Kamoshida” so in the period where I was waiting to do the fight (in the real world, not in the game) he’d just randomly ask me “when are you gonna castrate Kamoshida”
-I went from a Makoto hater to a… somewhat Makoto enjoyer? From what I’ve heard I think I’ll like her more in Strikers
-I know Kasumi/Sumire is kinda set up as the main love interest girl or whatever in Royal but I never once wanted to date her (no hate on those who do though), my initial impression of her was that she was like one of those underclassmen who you take under your wing when you’re in school and joke about being your kid and stuff
-also let me romance the bros:((((
-I didn’t date anyone but if I had to I’d probably date Hifumi
-and if Joker wasn’t a fucking kid I’d date Takemi (I am not immune to hot punk doctor)
-and if I could romance the bros then I’d date Ryuji
-I was hoping and praying for Sojiro to take in Yusuke and I was very disappointed when it didn’t happen. Like who the fuck is taking care of him??? Doesn’t he need a guardian???????? He sent a text about eating fucking bread crusts once and I have never wanted to parent a fictional teenager more in my life
-Ryuji will say the gayest shit about Joker and then the game will remember he’s supposed to be the Straight Bro Guy™ and the overall experience is of someone who is very, VERY deeply in denial that he’s a lil bit of a fruit
-Ryuji: Thank you for being there for me dude I’ve never felt this way with anyone before and there’ll always be a place for you at my side
Ryuji, two seconds later: man I sure do love women
-(closeted bi disaster Ryuji methinks)
-Anyways you can pry queer Yusuke and queer Ann out of my cold dead hands
-my embarrassing confession is that I got lost in Kaneshiro’s palace like three times
-apparently I got close enough to having Mishima be my first Maxed confidant that my brother was getting concerned
-my brother told me that “if Yusuke asks you to go on an outing and you don’t commit, I’m never letting you play on my laptop again”
-I kinda hated Morgana towards the start of the game (mostly bc he was a dick to Ryuji) but he did grow on me around the 3rd palace. Then I got to the 6th palace and got back on my Morgana hater arc. My final opinion is that he’s just a lil hater but he’s alright. He’s lucky he’s cute
-I am not really a Mishima enjoyer but I think I have far less negative feelings about him than most of the P5 fandom. It doesn’t sit right with me that the game obviously wants the player to laugh at him even after showing that he went through bullying and abuse- characters like Yusuke have funny moments/lines while also having their trauma be validated, but Mishima isn’t allowed to have that and it feels kind of shitty
-so uhhhh for some reason my game skipped the entire middle phase of the Akechi fight?????
-when Maruki was bonding with the tentacles and said something to them like “I’m yours to use” my brother gave me a look like “don’t you dare fucking say it”
-(I said it)
#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5r#persona 5 spoilers#persona 5 royal spoilers#I miss this game already:(
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Denture Daddy
CW// implied unspecific sexual relationships, dom/sub talk, use of the word "daddy" and "mommy" in a non-parental form, mentioned hate sex note(s): basically the reader and Jibba (my TADC oc) playing a dumb game of who seems like a dom or sub to pass the time. Jibba can be seen as a bit of a "whore" but he wears it proudly. Rhett (who's mentioned) is another of my TADC ocs. A/N: This whole thing happened all because I wanted to say "denture daddy". I don't expect anyone to give a shit about this. But at the end of the day as long as my friend and I enjoy it, that's all that matters.
Conversations with Jibba was like a game of Russian roulette. You never knew what direction or topic would come up.
Sometimes the conversations were casual, asking how you were doing or if anything fun had happened. But then you’d get conversations about a tiered ranking of who was considered good in bed, only to get whiplash by a simple conversation on whether you were a dog or cat person.
It was a wild ride, to say the least, which is how you got roped into a conversation about your fellow circus captives and whether they fell into dom or sub-category—for shits and giggles that is.
“‘m just sayin’, ya look at Jax ‘n think he’s got this whole sadistic face to ‘im and it turns out he’s just as touch starved as he looks,” Jibba stated.
Right, they were sleeping together—something about hate fucking because of their prank war or some shit. Neither of them was very subtle about their pranks or their “hate sex” because if that was hate sex you hated to see what tamed sex was like.
Bunch of emotionally constipated idiots.
Jibba jabbed you with his elbow playfully, getting your attention back on him. “Thoughts on Kinger?”
“Definitely not a dom, in fact, it feels wrong to think about him even having sex.” You shuddered. Kinger felt too much like your dad, and thinking of your parent’s boinking was enough to make you wanna bleach your eyes.
He shrugged and crossed his arms before leaning his chest against your back. “Yea’ it’s like watchin’ ya gramparents be romantic an mushy.”
“Ugh,” you gagged, “why’d you have to make it worse? I was thinking of my dad at least.”
“Oo, you thinkin’ bout ya dad playing twista? Naughty, naughty.” he teased, shooting you a playful smirk.
You elbowed him hard, basking in the pained noise that left him. “You know damn well what I meant.”
Jibba groaned and rubbed his side, you had a mean right elbow. “Yea’ yeah, alright so what ‘bout Rhett?”
“Eye Daddy? Oh, yeah. Total dom, but like not like in that rough way—”
“—but in like a total control way? Oh yeah, ya don’t know how hard I’ve been tryin’ to crack that nut—metaphorically and literally.” Jibba scoffed and used your head as an armrest, staring out at the others doing one of Caine’s dumb lil games.
“Are you just making rounds to everyone?” You didn’t shame Jibba for his sex escapades, if anything good on him for finding some way to tame Jax’s awful behaviour.
“Only the hot ones.” You looked up at him despite his arm on your head and he sent you a wink. “I’ll get to ya in no time, less ya wanna jump the list then we can go find somewhere right now.”
“Yeah, not right now.” As entertaining as the thought was, you were quite relaxed just hanging out with the ridiculous man. Though it would be a tempting endeavor at a later time. “So, Ragatha?”
“Mm,” Jibba leaned back, taking most of his weight off of you but kept his arm in place. “She gives like, soft mommy vibes.” he waved his hand in a so-so gesture. “Though I feel like she has a lot of parental experiences if she’s been havin’ ta live with Jax for god knows how long.” He paused, eyes squinting in Ragatha’s direction. “I’d let her give me a good stern talk’ ta.”
“I’ll give you a stern talkin’ ta, if you don’t calm yourself.”
“Babe, this whole conversation is about who’s a dom and who’s not, how do ya expect me to keep calm?” he joked. You raised your arm again with a silent threat to elbow him and he swallowed. “Yeah, okay, calming down.”
“Pomni?”
The two of you fell silent, staring over at the anxious woman who was struggling to get out of Jax’s reach.
“Anxious chihuahua.” Both of you stated at the same time.
Jibba laughed that awful eerie death rattle of his. Did a toy like him really exist? God that was horrifying, who buys that for children? You knew he could control it but why did he have to do it now of all times?
He caught you staring and grinned. “Somethin’ wrong?”
Right, this is Jibba we’re talking about, he knows it’s creepy and did it intentionally. Bastard.
“No,” you rolled your eyes and looked back to Pomni. “She’s too anxious, poor woman probably has a hard time holding someone’s hand let alone sex. Though I’d rather not think about her sex life… feels wrong.”
“Oh, and thinkin’ ‘bout mine ain’t?”
You gave him a deadpan stare as to say ‘Really, that’s what you wanna ask?’. He cleared his throat and mumbled a little ‘touche’ before looking back at the others.
“Oo, I know a good one,” he snickered. “Caine.”
“Caine?” Well, at least he wasn’t asking you about Bubble.
For whatever unknown reason, at the mention of his name Caine appeared a few feet from the two of you with a loud pop. “Diiiid somebody say Caine?”
Jibba shook his head, seemed even with a lack of ears the loud pop affected him. You shook your own head, rubbing an ear. “Uh, not directly.”
Caine cocked his head in confusion, clearly not understanding you were simply talking about him—not trying to summon him. “I see. Well, while I’m here. Why aren’t you two participating?” he asked, waggling his fingers in the direction of the others.
“We’re playin’ our own game,” Jibba answered, giving you a playful nudge.
“Oh?” Caine floated closer, eyeing the lanky doll.
“Yea’, the game of dom or sub.”
Caine cocked his head again. “I don’t understand.”
Jibba snickered and you couldn’t help but cover up your own laugh with a grunt. “What he mean’s is—”
“Oh no, he’s like one of those tops with golden retriever vibes that when ya call ‘em daddy like yer sayin’ ‘good boy’ they get excited.” He covers his face, a genuine laugh instead of that death rattle laugh.
The look of confusion never leaves Caine’s face but you can’t help but join Jibba in his laughter, because he’s not wrong. You could say a lot of insulting or weird things to Caine, but if you use that dog tone with him he’ll take just about anything as a compliment or praise.
“Oh no,” you mumbled, he’d be so fun to fuck with. “He’s not a dom…” you snicker, “but I’d still call him daddy.”
“Denture Daddy!” Jibba bursts out, nearly knocking himself and you off your perch.
The two of you laugh so loud it catches the attention of the others across the way. You wave your hand at Ragatha’s confused expression and further try to prevent the two of you from falling.
“I hate to intrude on this moment of merriment but,” Caine clears his throat, looking between the two of you with confused concern. “You two do know I’m not your father, yes?”
Jibba lets out a scream that turns everyone’s attention back onto you two, only to follow with nearly scream-level laughter from the man. You can’t really blame him though because you haven’t stopped laughing either, especially not long enough to try and explain to Caine that the two of you weren’t calling him father.
You give Caine what one could only describe as some form of yes as an answer before telling him he can go between cries and Caine leaves hesitantly. Your sides are starting to ache from so much laughing, meanwhile, Jibba has his face buried into his hands and is leaning into your shoulder like you’d be able to stop his laughter and tears.
He’s taking this a lot funnier than you but man, “denture daddy” is gonna always be in the back of your mind when you look at Caine from now on.
#tadc#the amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus x reader#the amazing digital circus oc#tadc oc#tadc original character#original character x reader#tadc rhett (oc)#tadc jibba (oc)
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Hi sex witch! I could use some advice about how to approach having sex for the first time.
I’m in my mid 20s (lesbian) and I’ve been in 3 relationships, but none of them lasted very long and I didn’t have sex with any of my partners (or the few people between them, who I’ve mostly intensely made out with). I’ve realized that I have issues around romantic relationships specifically and commitment, and done a lot of reflection so I know where those issues are stemming from but not how to deal with them. One day I do want to take the time to work through it, but for the moment I’ve decided I don’t have the capacity to prioritize that and don’t want a serious relationship in the near future anyway.
However, I really want to have casual sex. Through some past experiences I’ve realized that my relationship hang ups are purely emotional and frankly I’m horny, I just want to get laid (preferably by someone I barely know). It’s genuinely not a big deal to me emotionally that it’ll be my “first time” (past some embarrassment that it’s taken me so long, though I hate feeling it and I know there’s no “correct” age here), but I feel like I’d have some responsibility to let the other person know? And I’m worried that it will be a big deal for the other person or it’ll change things for them, because there’s this culture around virginity. I guess I don’t owe anyone that info, but when I think about not disclosing it I feel bad that I might be terrible due to inexperience, or have to admit during sex that I don’t really know what I’m doing, and then have to justify why I didn’t tell them. Basically I just don’t know how to navigate my first time considering all of this, I know this isn’t about the physical side of things but any advice you have would be greatly appreciated!!
hi anon,
listen: you're overthinking this. generally when embarking on a new activity for the first time, you're going to have the best experience if you just tell your partner(s) up front that you haven't done this before. that doesn't create a better or worse experience, but it is a different one that not everyone is up for. that doesn't mean you're wrong for not having sexual experience or that they're wrong for not wanting to have sex with you; it just means you're incompatible.
look, it's like d&d, okay? personally I LOVE running games with new players, because getting to help them build their first character and walk them through the rules and watch them gain enough confidence to take big roleplaying swings and get really strategic during battle is really satisfying for me. but not every DM wants to do that; not everyone has the patience or inclination to show other people the ropes, and they'd just prefer everyone knows roughly how the game works upon arrival so they can get right to it. this is actually a great metaphor because even experienced DMs and players who have been sharing a table for years still need to actually talk to each other and come to agreements about their players and the rules and, like, what Mage Hand can get away with, but it's a different kind of communication than you'd have with someone who's still learning which dice do what.
if you don't like dungeons and dragons and this metaphor sucked for you, here's a slightly more universal one about visiting a museum for the first time.
anyway, the point is that I'm an advocate of sharing information, not because you have some kind of moral duty to out yourself as a virgin, as if that's a weird and bad thing to be, but because I think sharing relevant info makes for better sex and sexual history is part of that info. it doesn't reflect poorly on you in any capacity, any more than someone having a large number of sexual partners would. it's just one more thing to talk through with your potential future sexual partner(s) as you figure out exactly how you want to have fun together.
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it’s pride month, so i’m gonna take the opportunity to talk about something relatively serious for once.
if you have even half an opportunity, it is really important to actually mention queer stuff around other people. especially children. i’m not saying you have to personally educate everyone you meet, most people ain’t got time for that. but i am saying that there is a social avoidance of discussing even queer stuff as a topic in a lot of spaces.
let me give an example irl of what i mean. i’m trans. very openly so. and frankly, i could not have been more obviously trans when i was younger if i had tried. when i was a child in primary school, and we’d be divided into boys and girls for yard games, it was once phrased as “if you’d rather be a boy go on this side” and similar for the other. i of course, went over to the girls side, and was interrogated about why i could possibly want that. did anyone say that was even possible? mention the existence of trans people? no. nothing. similar events happened countless times through my life. i eventually figured out i liked guys towards middle and high school, and was quite openly gay. i remember so many people in that period who i’d complain to about how desperately i wished i was a girl, that i wasn’t a gay guy. did any of them mention the existence of trans people? no, of course not. even among queer people, they’d often give me a look when i’d talk about wishing i was a girl, that i didn’t have a gender, that i just hated being a guy, as if they knew something i didn’t. but did they say anything? no of course not.
and on and on it went, until one day i encountered the idea of being trans. the word trans. at a work diversity seminar of all things. i left the place yearning desperately more than anything in life that i was trans so i could transition. because that sounded like everything i had ever wanted. and i told people as such. but did they say anything? clarify that being trans wasn’t some obvious thing you were born with and would automatically know? no of course not.
eventually i did figure it out. after 23 years and meeting openly trans people online. but if literally anyone had brought up the possibility that i could be trans, when i was 5? 6? i would have leaped on it in a heartbeat.
and all that dancing around words, of refusing to discuss queer things around me for... no clear reason i know of. it didn’t help me. the extra time to think about it didn’t help without the words or concepts to even talk about what i was feeling.
what it did accomplish, was leave me with an entire experience of puberty, watching my body transform into something i desperately wished i could escape. it left me with countless scars as i carved at everywhere the body hair came in. scars on my chest, that felt wrong and empty and hard. it left me with a sharp pain in my heart every time a family member called me “handsome” or “manly”.
and when one day i eventually did find out. and came out as trans. and started talking about wanting different pronouns and for people to stop threatening to cut my hair while i slept, suddenly there was a change. everyone in my family suddenly wanted to introduce me to trans close friends of theirs. suddenly wanted to be supportive and help. wanted to introduce me to all the trans people they knew.
but i’ve seen both sides. i’ve seen how that entire concept was carefully avoided until i was part of it.
please, don’t be like that. talk about these things. especially around children, but also around your peers. even the openly queer or gay ones. not all of us have had that opportunity to learn these things. i went through school in the southern us with an abstinence only sex ed class. my “talk” with my folks was my granddad one day saying unprompted that condoms are important and i should carry them “just in case”. even interacting online, it took years before i found circles that talked about these things.
tl;dr please talk about queer subjects. not everyone knows what a therian is, or what trans is, they might not even know about being bi or poly, all of those words need to be learned. and avoiding them unless someone already is openly such, only causes more harm.
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Isolation and Anxiety:
12/03/24
Makes sense that some people isolate themselves simply because they are overwhelmed, they’ve got a lot of anxiety, depression and or stress. Especially if they don’t feel good enough or were embarrassed by something, it’s natural to wanna hide yourself…
For me, this year alone I’ve spent so much time to myself. I even dreaded for my husband to come home some days because I was wanting to be alone with my thoughts of the past. It was nothing against my husband but I’ve been learning to trust myself again since I blocked Andrew and Jake’s numbers. I couldn’t trust either of them even though I wanted to. (I hated how I felt towards my husband cuz he’s so good to me. I don’t ever wanna hurt him or lose him.)
My ex Cody told me he was a narcissist and bipolar. He also told me some other things I can’t remember it all and I don’t wanna share all his private stuff but he TOLD me he isolates himself and I didn’t understand why back then so when he’d do it, I’d BEG him to let me back in… I tried to gain his trust and make him feel safe with me but I was NEVER safe with him. Everything with my exes was always going to be one-sided. They want respect, trust, loyalty, love, safety and empathy but they can’t give me those things in return. Did they even want to??
I hold no judgment. My ex Andrew would randomly disappear 2/3 days at a time and NEVER give me clear reasons why… He would just cry to me that he’s “soooo busy with school” but when I would offer to break up with him so he can focus on school and prioritize his studies, he’d get super defensive and throw a fit. I didn’t know why he kept disappearing!! Was it on purpose to hurt me and play games?? Was it because he was cheating??? He was cheating too but did he also ignore those other girls and disappear on those girls too??
Maybe Andrew also isolates but couldn’t explain it to me or feel comfortable with me enough to talk to me about it… (or he wasn’t self aware) While Cody told me and warned me he was a narcissist, Andrew never said such a thing. However, the actions and behaviors of Andrew appeared narcissistic. Especially how weird he always acted on a holiday with me. I hate so much to feel this way towards him. I know I’m not crazy though!! I know I experienced some type of emotional abuse by all my exes. There is no other explanations to the confusion I’ve experienced.
I had never known what all that was. Yes Cody told me he was a narcissist but I sorta googled it at the time and thought “eh, whatever. Idc I still love him….” Jeez I ignored everything Cody was basically warning me about. He probably thought I was too naive but I just believed love was more powerful back then than anything Cody threw at me!!!! I wasn’t “Stupid” I had a heart. I had feelings and I had dreams. I believed in Cody and in my love for him. I would’ve never left him…. I was 110% all in for him but after he ghosted me, I realized there was no future with him and walked away…. Then I tried to let my guard down for Andrew right after but It took me months before I truly let Andrew in and once I did, he had full control over my emotions and I was sad most of our relationship ❤️🩹 He kept ignoring me and making me feel bad but then randomly would come back and be all over me…. Acting obsessed. WAS SO CONFUSING!! 🫤
Anxiety is real because I’ve lived it before for years. Anxiety, depression and suicide are all cousins. They all run together and it’s easy to experience them all. Sometimes all at once. You can’t just “get over them” and while the battle IS in your mind, it’s not a battle you can win on your own. No medication fixes it. Maybe you just manage it. It’s a REAL battle that takes a higher power and higher self control of the mind. You literally need a transformation and renewing in your mind. I lived it!! I threatened to kill myself more times than I can count 😞 That’s why it’s so hard to judge my exes. Most people would want “justice” or “revenge” but WHO AM I??? I’m not better than my exes… I struggled in my own mental health and I understand wanting to isolate yourself and be alone…. I understand not feeling good enough or feeling embarrassed!! I’m sad my exes couldn’t let me relate to them and try to understand them and help them… instead they push me away and hurt me. My exes gave me so much anxiety with the way they kept rejecting me but always coming back to me. So much confusion and delusions!!!!
my exes were 110% safe with me but sadly I felt Cody and Andrew hated me with a passion. I felt they only wanted to hurt me as a joke…. I felt they thought it was fun to break my heart ❤️🩹❤️🩹 I STILL don’t hate them. I want only the best for them but I lost all trust with them. I won’t ever be safe with them nor will they ever consider my feelings above their own. I was so willing to put them 1st in my world but I was NEVER a priority for them…. It is what it is. I’m getting over them each day it’s been a difficult process to “fall out of love” with the ideas I had of them and the dreams I was making with them. I was willing to move to Cali to be with Cody back then but I realize now it would’ve been a huge mistake cuz I’d miss my family too much ❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹 but I certainly dreamt of a life with both my exes I know now it was ideas and fantasies in my head. Nothing was real!!!
#anxitey#isolation#depression#mental health#healing journal#my story#personal story#unpacking#emotional abuse#self awareness#heartbreak#online relationships#emotional wounds#toxic relationship#abusive relationships#mental abuse#mental awareness#self discovery#no judgement#no hate#closure#healing journey#healing takes time#healing is hard#healingjourney#healing is not linear#healing is a process#healing is a journey#healing is possible#trauma recovery
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Most of the stuff I scrap together doesn’t have a theme, well let me correct myself, the theme is what you make it. Whatever any of it makes you feel is exactly what the theme of it is.
These just so happen to have a theme, just some general stuff that piqued my interest at the time that I was creating. These are also some early stuff I made in the past year and definitely some of the more organized content on the mild side of emotional. Not that anything I’ve made is that deep but some stuff has definitely evoked more emotion that I’m excited to share
The therapeutic relief in just placing little digital cutouts wherever was unreal and I was making these left and right.
My friends said “these would be cool screensavers” and the idea that someone would use them as such was cool to me. But really any interaction from strangers on the internet is fucking cool to me. That’s why I’ve made a third social media profile specifically for this work because the responses I’ve gotten from shuffles and TikTok have been so fun.
Me personally I do not even have any of my stuff as my own screensaver I just kinda like to sit and stare, make a habit out of my eye scan for each one like tracing steps and I hope that someone does that too.
I made a little game of it, I started hiding a letter G in every single collage. (Not the first one I didn’t get the idea until after lol)
so every single missing tooth collage you’ll ever see from this post forward is always going to have a “G” in it. (The love of my entire life’s name starts with G for anyone curious)
Some in plain sight, some I have to sit and stare at for a moment.
This derived from my own personal experience at therapy as a kid. I wasn’t much for outward vocal expression of my feelings and for weeks I sat and looked at the therapist I was visiting without saying anything. Finally a few weeks in she handed me a Halloween edition ISpy book and here I am years later taking creating my own rendition because it was an underrated outlet that made me feel peaceful.
I encourage anyone who is feeling like shit and took the time to make it this far down the post to follow me, or favorite something and keep tabs to revisit, if you ever need a breather take a look and find the “G”
If you’re competitive, take a look and try to find something I post that doesn’t have a G and point it out to me.
Make anything your screen saver and if you do show me I’d love to see what you picked
Send my stuff to your bestfriend at 3AM
Show your favorite cousin my tumblr and tell them to find my TikTok for you.
Tell me that I made something that reminds you of your ex bestfriend and you wish you could send it to them because you miss them and you’d know they’d like it.
(Send it to them anyways)
Send me love, send me hate, send me whatever is on your mind about anything I create, I’m usually awake
-❌🦷
#screensaver#halloween#poetry#welcome home#ted lasso#welcome to the table#anons welcome#emotional#artists on tumblr#star wars#love#chappell roan#fanart#mac miller#collage#colors#follow#favorite#locally hated#missingtooth#findyourthing#artitst on tumblr#trending#coraline
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A maybe a too thorough review of lies of p from a person who has 0 soulslike experience and went blindly into the game:
Firstly, the games fantastic and I’ve loved my whole experience with it. I usually am disinclined to play soulslike due to characteristics in games I don’t like: open world, difficulty, and—most importantly—how the story is provided. What drove me towards playing the lies of p, however, was hearsay about how the narrative was provided as far as world building. I’ve never read Pinocchio and I will be honest, my memory of the story lies in Kingdom hearts (which I haven’t played in like 20 years lol). A side note: I also HATE character builders. I don’t want to make a character, I want to play a character already made. God bless, P.
The game came in clutch after playing a ton of dissatisfying and unpolished games. FFXVI had a great narrative, but game was too easy. Bayonetta 3 was just bad overall. Lollipop chainsaw repop was poorly remastered to the near point of unplayability. However—lies of p? Provided the exact thing I was looking for: a beautifully polished game that was difficult but fun.
The environment was just so beautiful and pandered to my love of all things pretty. It doesn’t help that Pieta was a heavy reference in the game—arguably my favorite marble statue (always grateful I got to see it in person).
The gameplay? Addicting. I’m horrendous at this game. Absolutely awful. Fuoco took me two days to beat. Nameless puppet? A day and a half. But it felt good to beat them. The pattern memorization was something I truly loved. The satisfaction of beating a boss (no specter, no items) was so satisfying after holding your breath for moments at a time.
In a game full of open worlds, lies of p, you remain something special in my heart. I LOVE THE LEVEL DESIGN. IM SO ANTI OPEN WORLD YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE. I don’t like driving sometimes, you really believe I’d travel to some minor location for random bullshit? FOH.
Going in very very blind, I had no clue there was a hidden mechanic. Let alone 3 endings. I got the middle(?) ending in which geppetto dies and calls p useless which made me so mad that I started a new game immediately. I hate geppetto and I refuse to let him have the last word on P’s self worth LMAO. Although the ending was bad, I’m happy I got it based on my choices—which I played authentically me as opposed to having a preconceived idea of what could potentially happen.
However, several thing I wish there was more of:
Cutscenes
Insight on characters
This is personal, but I wish P SPOKE HIS LINES. But I get it
I’m a FF/MGS girly through and through. So I’m a bit spoiled with cutscenes and immense detail to things.
Again, MGS/FF girly, I like characters and am interested in learning more about them to the point where I know their favorite food lol. FOR EXAMPLE the black rabbit brotherhood? I know they overran the town, but who are they truly? ROMEO. ROMEO? WHERE FOR ART THOU ROMEO??? Clearly he was important to Carlo. AND CARLO??? HELLO?????? I’ve grown attached to these enemy characters BUT THE INSIGHT ARE CRUMBS. GIMME MORRRRREEEEEE.
also, I’m just saying, the exposition for every character gets dry really fast to the point I’m borderline dissociating. It’s infinitely better than HZD. But part of the reason I like character interaction is that you can learn so much about who people are by how they talk to people in their environment. And given P is a robot, it would’ve been absolutely amazing to hear him speak like pucinella (very choppy. Static-y) to something more fluid filled with something that is very humanizing (sarcasm). I also just wanted p to talk to Romeo, that shit is a wholeass miscommunication fic.
Anyway. This game is a solid 9/10 and I’m happy. It’s fun. I loved it.
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A/N: This is just a little fic that came to me. Set post “Personal”.
***
A Piece of the Truth
“I’ll take three,” Deeks said, eyes focused on the cards he held slightly turned away from Kensi. Kensi obligingly dealt him three cards, and took two for herself.
Deeks raised her five skittles, adding to the pile of brightly colored currency on his hospital tray. Kensi pushed five of her own candies, mind only half-focused on the game.
“Pair of aces, I win,” Deeks announced a few minutes later, gathering his “winnings” towards the opposite side of the table. He hadn’t actually eaten any of them, but poker seemed to be a passable distraction from the pain of his recent bullet wounds.
“You lied to me,” Kensi said abruptly. Deeks paused in the process of gathering the cards together, eyes lowered in true confusion.
“Ok…about what?”
“You told me your dad fired a gun at you six years ago on Thanksgiving.” It came out as more of an accusation than she intended, but Deeks didn’t give any indication that he’d noticed.
“Actually, I think what I said was that I hate Thanksgiving. You inferred that I was saying that my hatred of the holiday was associated with my dad trying to shoot me.”
Kensi marveled at his ability to misdirect while hopped up on heavy duty pain medication. It was as impressive as it was annoying. She didn’t let it get her off track though.
“Quit trying to lawyer me into dropping the subject, Deeks. Why did you let me believe this event happened so recently and downplay the incident? Why make up a story?” she asked.
Deeks went quiet, eyes focused on his fingers sorting through the collection of skittles. It reminded her of when they’d been going through his list of enemies. She’d seen a new, quieter, sober version of him that she rarely, if ever got the opportunity to experience on their short partnership.
“There’s something about telling people that you shot your dad when you were 11 that tends to end conversations pretty quickly,” he replied eventually, upper lip lifting slightly as he let out a dark little huff of laughter. “For some reason they find it unnerving.” He sighed heavily then, tipping his chin upwards. “I suppose I just didn’t want to deal with the preconceived notions and repercussions that come with that reveal.”
“You thought I’d judge you for it?”
“You saying you didn’t when I told you now?” he asked shrewdly.
“I was concerned,” Kensi insisted, pushing back the small voice that reminded her about the shock and disquiet she’d felt initially as well. “That’s a horrible thing to find out about someone. And a terrible situation for you to be put in.”
“Mm, well, it was a long time ago.” Deeks shifted with a grimace, his tone dismissive. “If it makes you feel any better, I take creative license with my life pretty frequently,” he added. “I consider it good practice for covers.”
“Right,” Kensi muttered. There was an awkward little silence, and then Deeks gestured to the cards.
“You wanna play again?”
“Sure.” She dealt out another hand, mind once again focused on her partner. For a man who talked so much, she was finding out she really knew very little about him.
#ncis la fanfiction#marty deeks#kensi blye#light angst#Deeks backstory#post personal#ejzah fanfiction
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I’m gonna throw all my initial thoughts about rebirth here while the ending is fresh:
1) Myrna is adorable, 10/10 no notes
2) I literally gasped aloud when Zack touched Cloud and ended up fighting along side him
3) I feel like square is fucking with us at this point with all the stamp variations
4) I’m still very hopeful for an ending where Zack is fully back. It’s interesting that they are using the white room again like in AC, I’m wondering what connection that has to the livestream and who ends up rejoining vs being in the room and what that means
5) I really need a list of everything that was changed or expanded upon vs the original
6) I’m a little conflicted with the styling of the Gi and the sort of characterization of them as a group of people. I’d be less conflicted if square hadn’t royally made asses of themselves in FF16, but they lost a lot of benefit of the doubt there recently. But having a group that is styled to look like (to my eyes anyway) African tribesmen, positioning them as outside invaders, and having them say that the cetra’s exclusion of them is why they poured all their hate into a world-ending material is uh…….not great, and it’s even worse when positioned in a narrative about the corrupting power of anger and the need for letting things go. It comes off as a “oh but slavery/colonization/etc. was so long ago, why are you still hung up on it, you’re being divisive by not just moving on.” Left a really bad taste in my mouth after that section, hopefully they just leave it there instead of digging a bigger hole in pt 3
7) I’m putting my money on part 3 coming out in 2027 for the 30th anniversary
8) after them bringing Weiss and Nero back in intergrade, and after reminding myself of them showing up at the end of crisis core, I’m guessing they will show up again when the party goes to midgar in pt 3
9) I’m going to have to find a way to replay dirge of Cerberus
10) still not sure what’s going on with them trying to say that cloud thought Zack drowned??? Presumably it’s sephiroth fuckery
11) I really need context for a) why they added roche as a character and b) why he would have volunteered for a hojo experiment
12) maybe ever crisis has / will do some of this, but I really want some context for like, what fuckery happens in SOLDIER post crisis core and pre main game with their whole chain of command fucked
13) the level design and environment people did a phenomenal job
14) Zack’s new voice actor did waaaayy better this time, whether through practice or better voice direction or both. It actually sounded more like him
15) sad to see the banora posters around but no mention of angeal and genesis (unless you count the loveless production being version G as a genesis mention)
16) square really decided to punish me for not using magic most of the game with that elemental barrier at the end
17) I ship clerith way more than I used to. Remake/rebirth have given her so much more character
18) same for yuffie, I’m glad she got intergrade and with the wutai war being a bigger deal I’m looking forward to better characterization for her too
19) curious what the plan is for cid since they’ve brought him in differently
20) and still a little heartbroken that cid/vincent aren’t full party members
21) I guess wedge appearing in the loveless scene with Jesse/biggs means he did die at the shinra building when the whispers pushed him
22) it’s neat that your weapon changes in scenes based on what you have equipped, but it does really ruin a lot of the cinematic parallels with Zack if you don’t keep the buster sword equipped all game
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4. Does your OC have a failed friendship or relationship they still think about? What happened? Is it an unresolved regret or is there a chance for reconciliation?
5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?
6. Does your OC know magic? Were they born with magical ability or did they train to acquire it? What is their favorite type of magic? Least favorite?
17. Does your OC have an enemy? What happened between them? Is it mutual or one-sided? Is it petty or serious? Is one party seeking revenge? Does one person want the other dead or are they content to hate them from afar?
19. Has your OC ever had an experience with the paranormal or the divine? What happened? Was it a one time encounter or is it a normal part of their life? Did they find it terrifying or thrilling?
Thank you so much for posting the questions, because I definitely lost the original post. 😭😭
Spoilers below the cut
4. Does your OC have a failed friendship or relationship they still think about? What happened? Is it an unresolved regret or is there a chance for reconciliation?
If Salem had any good relationships prior to the Nautiloid, he can’t remember, amnesia and all that. I do wonder what his relationship with Gortash was like – were they actually friends or lovers, or just really good business partners? The in-game dialogue makes it sound like they were thick as thieves.
5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?
In-game he uses that cool staff from Auntie Ethel’s lair, but I imagine him using a sickle or scythe as his main weapon. Something a bit gnarly and related to interaction with nature, but sinister. He also wears a boot knife. I don’t think he’d have any special training with them, just experience from living rough all his life and engaging in normal and definitely not illegal Dark Urge activities.
6. Does your OC know magic? Were they born with magical ability or did they train to acquire it? What is their favorite type of magic? Least favorite?
He was definitely born with some kind of dark magic, being who he is and all that. But the tiny little part of him that didn’t belong to his father was always drawn towards nature – both its orderly and chaotic sides. The cycle of life, death, decay, and rebirth. He learned folk healing, alchemy, and something much darker – necromancy. His favorite types of magic are the kind of magic he learns from the Circle of Spores – fungal rot and necromancy – and oddly enough, healing. He doesn’t dislike any particular kind of magic, but dislikes wizards, if that counts.
17. Does your OC have an enemy? What happened between them? Is it mutual or one-sided? Is it petty or serious? Is one party seeking revenge? Does one person want the other dead or are they content to hate them from afar?
He has a CVS receipt length list of enemies.
He has beef with Orin, possibly more than anyone else in the game, because, well, you know! And then there’s his father of course. I don’t think Salem would have ever been content to just let Orin go. They have history on top of history.
I’m not entirely sure about Gortash. Maybe they’re just enemies out of necessity? I’d love to know more about their canon relationship.
And there’s always Auntie Ethel. In the game, he kind of has to fight her, but in my canon, they’re petty rivals at worst.
19. Has your OC ever had an experience with the paranormal or the divine? What happened? Was it a one time encounter or is it a normal part of their life? Did they find it terrifying or thrilling?
Considering what the Dark Urge is, many many many experiences, repeated. The most stand out ones are probably meeting Vlaakith and subsequently waving nonchalantly, fighting the Netherbrain, and of course, being killed by one spiteful god only to be resurrected by another who saw good in him. That last one was altogether horrifying for him. That’s an experience he’d rather not repeat.
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Journey Into the Wild Beyond
Chapter 2: Hither (Part 2)
There’s a thing that happens sometimes when running tabletop games: railroading. In a plot-driven game, Game Masters/Dungeon Masters need to get the party to follow the plot somehow. Unlike in video games, tabletop games don’t have quest logs and map markers telling you where to go and what to do. I know I previously talked about “I want to go there”, and I wholeheartedly believe in and support that idea, but for the sake of keeping games from being endless wandering, you need to have a clear goal with reminders for the party.
On the other hand, if you do this too often or present only a single way forward, the players can feel like they’re being railroaded down a non-branching path where their choices don’t matter. This is a tricky balance to maintain. So how do we do it?
Spider-Sense
In addition to the dreams that each player would experience in proximity to their lost item, any player who had a lost item in the current zone would feel a magnetic pull or sorts. They would know which direction their item was in and maybe an approximate distance. This is mostly from the book. How to keep them from going straight there and ending the chapter in a single session?
Well, Hither has a neat built-in way. The item is with the hag, the hag is in the town of Downfall, and the most convenient way to enter Downfall is through Brigand’s Tollway, occupied by the harengon brigands and their leader, Agdon Longscarf. But, the party learned that someone had recently been to Downfall and gotten out…mostly safely.
A goblin named Jingle Jangle had stolen a key from the hag’s cottage, but the brigands had stolen a bag of truffles from her and beat her up on the way back. She would know a way in. Jingle Jangle was a bit odd though. A hermit who once had a deep fear of finding herself on the wrong side of a locked door. Bavlorna removed that fear, but replaced it with an obsession with collecting keys and a dulled sense of self. Jingle Jangle only refers to herself in the third person.
The party went to Telemy Hill, a living hill where the goblin made her home. The hill was concerned about Jingle Jangle (who hadn’t left her cave in days) and let the party know it through two living trees who Hakewood named Treech and Trong.
I have exactly the players I deserve.
When they met with Jingle Jangle, the party got the information they needed through talking and through kindness. They offered her food and talked with her for a while. I started noting things like this because I wanted it to pay off at some point. If the players were going to show kindness, make friends, and attempt non-violence, then they would be rewarded for it.
And it wouldn’t be long before they surprised me again.
Hareraiser
Jingle Jangle gave the party a map with a relatively safe path through Brigand’s Tollway. There were still harengon brigands about, but at least they wouldn’t be marching right through their camp. Time for stealth checks!
DM’s Bane #413: Pass Without a Trace
If you’re unfamiliar, Pass Without a Trace is a spell that gives +10 to stealth checks to any ally within a 30 foot radius. I believe it was Artie who cast this on the party as they entered Brigand’s Tollway, and it lasted for one hour. The harengons only had a passive perception of 14, so as long as the stealth rolls were at least 5 or higher even without a modifier, they would pass.
The final check was at a chokepoint to get into Downfall and Agdon Longscarf was there with his 16 passive perception. Confrontation time! Agdon tried to shake them down for everything they had. This is a badass bandit who has been stealing from people all over Hither and giving their stuff to the hag. Clearly a fight was going to happen.
They offered him friendship.
This isn’t a D&D campaign, this is a preschool cartoon.
Okay, I’d let them try to do some convincing and then set a high DC (Difficulty Class), because Agdon wasn’t entirely unreasonable. He hated the hags as much as anyone. The party made Persuasion checks and succeeded.
You know, that was a cool encounter where Agdon would be running around at high speed, hitting the players, and doing some hefty damage. The best way to stop him would be to grab the end of his scarf and hold him in place, at which point he would surrender in a panic because he doesn’t like being trapped.
Well, I guess the party has some bandit friends now.
How Can We Screw This Up More?
Downfall was pretty straight forward. There was a path around a central bog with a large three story cottage on stilts. Along the way, they party met an elf without a heart (theirs was taken by Bavlorna in another deal gone wrong), found reanimated heads of deceased frog kings displayed on pikes, and the current ruler of the frog people, a puppet king who reluctantly served the hag. He allowed the party to pass through to the cottage because they had found the hag’s book - Bavlorna’s Big Book of Bad Blood.
As a joke, I had one of the king’s men take the party to the dock where they were introduced to a luxury boat known as the Royal Skiff. After being told of all of its features, the frog pointed them to the boat they would actually be taking, a rickety row boat that looked like it was about to sink.
They didn’t even hesitate to steal the Royal Skiff. I didn’t penalize them for that because that was absolutely the correct call.
So, I’ve mentioned frog people, or bullywugs. These were prevalent throughout Downfall, as well as a giant toad, and Hakewood himself kept a pet toad familiar under his hat. I say this because Rhin’s player wrote in a character quirk that Rhin was afraid of frogs and toads. This is about to be really funny, but first, a dungeon crawl.
In one of the first rooms of the cottage, the party found sewing supplies and pincushion dolls. One of the dolls had four arms - similar to the arms that grabbed Ana in Elora’s dream at the start of the chapter. She grabbed this doll, filled her alchemy jug with oil, lit the oil, and held the doll over it for a Batman-style interrogation.
I hated that the doll was just a mundane doll and not actually alive or linked to anyone, because that was hilarious.
You Did What to the Gelatinous Cube?
In the previous part I mentioned having an idea brewing in response to Elora trying to do some science on living mud creatures in the middle of battle. Now, I’ve got a party full of magic school students. An alchemist, a wizard, a cleric, a druid, and a fighter. Their different classes and backgrounds would give them unique sets of skills, and if they wanted to take a non-confrontational approach to the campaign, I could allow them to use these skills to do some off the wall stuff.
So when they found a clogged up well in the cottage feeding a small wading pool, they started doing some science. Elora determined that what little water there was had a slight acidic quality to it. The others noticed the well was full of water but it didn’t seem to be moving. Artie made a check with all of this information and figured out there was a gelatinous cube in the well.
If you haven't seen one of these, it’s like a 10 foot cube of acid jello.
The players began asking if they could neutralize the gelatinous cube by introducing a base because science. Artie piped up that he had some mushrooms because he’s a Circle of Spores druid and into growing mushrooms. Reasoning that mushrooms are alkaline, that could act as a base and–
Me: “Hang on, let me think about what that would actually do.” Players: “Bases neutralize acids, so–” Me: “No, I know. I’m trying to figure out what it would do to a gelatinous cube.”
Yeah, weirdly, they don’t cover this in the Monster Manual or the Dungeon Master’s Guide, so I was left to make a ruling on my own. Now, the obvious answer is this is a magical creature who does acid damage and a handful of mushrooms aren’t going to do anything to it, so just have the cube attack the players and do a long boring combat.
But I want to reward this creativity and have silly solutions to problems in my campaign, so they toss the mushrooms into the well. A moment later, the gelatinous cube rises out of it, partially dissolving into water and looking as angry as jello can look. The party ran upstairs and left that little surprise for someone else.
The Line Has Been Toad
On the way through the cottage, the party had a look at that Big Book of Bad Blood. It’s basically Bavlorna’s “burn book” where she talks about how much she hates everyone. The party discovered one entry had been erased and replaced with Zybilna’s entry. The replaced entry was faded and difficult to make out, but with some investigating, they were able to determine it said “Natasha”.
That becomes important later.
For now, the party is ready to confront their first hag. I decided that barring extraordinary circumstances, there would be no getting around the hag fights. These were Chaotic Evil hags who had done horrible things. There was no bargaining, they needed to die. Bavlorna was paranoid, wouldn’t listen to the party’s attempts to get her to stand down, and she felt cornered by the way they were circling her.
Fight time. And I discovered a massive flaw in the encounter design right away. Yeah, Bavlorna has a pretty big weakness in that she can be slightly nerfed by someone running “widdershins” around her (counter clockwise) which induces a sneezing fit to prevent her from doing some of her moves, but she has minions who attack three times per turn. A party member almost went down right there. The encounter, allegedly, is doable at level 2 or 3. The party was level 4 and it almost went bad for them.
Eventually, Bavlorna fell, musing that her sister Endelyn was wrong - it wasn’t Elora’s sister who would be the downfall of the Hourglass Coven.
With Bavlorna dead, Rhin felt a stronger pull, leading her upstairs to the attic and a room with a giant brass toad statue that acted as an pocket dimension.
I swear, that’s straight from the book. I had forgotten all about that container when I assigned Rhin’s missing item to Bavlorna. Rhin, the one with the fear of frogs and toads. But, she pushed through her fear, reached inside, and pulled out a rosary with a raven’s skull on it.
A vision showed Rhin the same scene as her dream, only she remembers things differently now. She joined the widower in his prayers to the earth and offered him comfort. She discovers a drive to revolutionize how funerals and burial rights are done, offering cheap and creative ways to honor the dead and respect the traditions of them and the loved ones they leave behind.
The rosary itself, named Eternity’s Canvas, would be a legendary item for Rhin that would grant her a feat and a couple of special abilities. I wanted these recovered items to be special, and this was the first.
Rhin was kind of a mortuary student at Magewood Academy. Her player decided to flavor the goblin ability Fury of the Small as Rhin's familiarity with anatomy helping her deal extra damage. And since Rhin's player and I are both fans of Caitlin Doughty/Ask a Mortician (I think fae may have introduced me to that channel actually), I themed Rhin's rosary and restored creativity around that.
The rest of the party saw a portrait that confirmed the appearances of the other hags, as well as another - a human woman with dark hair whose name was scratched off of the name plate and whose face had been torn off the portrait. They had the four armed Endelyn Moongrave and the doll-like Skabatha Nightshade left to find.
Hither, Thither, and Yon
With the first hag defeated and the first item recovered, I had pretty effectively communicated what the players could look forward to for the rest of the game. They knew the stakes, they knew the rewards, they knew what was expected of them. Now they were off to the next land, Thither, but first they had a few stops to make. I’ll roll all of that together in the next part.
#d&d#d&d 5e#dm#gm#journey into the wild beyond#the wild beyond the witchlight#puns will continue until morale improves#is it me or are these getting longer
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