#and the more reserved characters as well!

[bengiyo]

The Uncertain Melancholy of Our Youth

I’ve been sorting out how I feel about the end of Our Youth, and I’ve yet to arrive at something concrete that I want to say. I’ve been reading reactions from others to see if someone else could vocalize what I’m feeling, and in the process realized I wanted to talk about Our Dating Sim again. 

Like many others, I’m left with a feeling of melancholy from this show. I feel a lot like @small-dark-and-delicious in that I think this ending felt very realistic for them, because Minase has never had friends he can count on, especially the “bespectacled demon” (@chicademartinica). I find myself empathizing a lot with @asiandramas-takeover about how bleak the future feels for them.

With this series overall, I’m a bit frustrated thematically. I was glad to have @wen-kexing-apologist offering insights about the manhwa while we were watching, because, like @worm-priest, I don’t think we did much with the different kinds of people theme. 

However, I am left with some genuinely warm feelings for the characters and the actors. I loved mj’s post reflecting on how Hirukawa connects for people who dread becoming like their parents (@forcebook). Like @memiaatanonymous, I really enjoyed Motojima Junsei in this; I especially loved the way he managed his physicality and expressions when Minase had to flee Hirukawa’s house before the dad began beating Hirukawa again. 

I also agree with @delasaria-blog that Minase in the special does a lot to close out this story; I don’t think I’d feel as positively as I do at the end of this without the effectiveness of the special episode. The implied growth of these two into a relatively stable couple (@incandescentflower) worked well for, especially because Minase was left with separation anxiety (@lurkingshan). I also really liked the way the show approached a closeted couple’s feelings about marriage as an inevitability (@jemmo).

I think it was @theside-b comparing this to the disappointment I know I felt at the end of Love is Better the Second Time Around that got me thinking about Our Dating Sim. In that show, we spend the majority of our time in the present with Shin Ki Tae pursuing Lee Wan again after Lee Wan abandoned him at the end of high school. Our journey with them is about how Lee Wan hurt Ki Tae and himself, and the consequences of Lee Wan's decision. We focus there on how Lee Wan has to grapple with the fact that Ki Tae was open to his feelings.

I think most of why I’m feeling a bit unfulfilled by this project is that I had hoped we’d spend more time in the present. The opening sequence had me waiting in anticipation for their eventual reunion and reconciliation. I had hoped we’d spend the bulk of the show on that, like in Our Dating Sim, rather than on the events leading to their separation. I think I set myself up for this because I brought too much of that to the table. 

Reflecting on what the show did or didn’t do, I don’t think there was much for me to gain from seeing Hirukawa and Minase’s separate montages, though I think it would have been interesting to see Minase getting lonelier and see where he and Hirukawa lost touch over the phone incident. I personally feel like I’d have liked to see more of them getting back together and rebuilding trust, because I felt myself pulling away from this show as it spiraled over Hirukawa’s life getting worse in the middle. There was almost a really great moment of Minase trying to step forward and use his voice only to be silenced by the adults and friends in his life. 

Final Verdict: 8, Recommended With Reservations. I’m not sure how I will feel about this show in the long term, and I want to thank everyone linked above for sharing their thoughts, and all the gifmakers included for their creations. There is a useful kind of melancholy here that I personally enjoy as a person who absolutely loved All of Us Strangers (2023) last year. I am always the type who, even though I know we’re seeing marked improvement in many categories, cannot erase the scars I carry from what I survived. I struggle to find a solid coherent thought I feel coming from this one, and I hope to read more compelling reflections in the weeks to come. 

[thewertsearch]

@hussianphilosopher submitted: Sally - longtime lurker, first time poster, big fan. I'm perpetually amazed by how thoughtful you are about Homestuck and how well you understand it for a first-time reader (you might be surprised how many people watch Cascade and don't actually understand that the Green Sun was just created, much less immediately put together everything Doc Scratch said and did that led up to it!). The high point of the liveblog for me was the whole arc of you being confused about how predestination in Homestuck worked, because, essentially, you had already figured out that the alpha timeline existed before the alpha timeline was introduced. You were confused about the story for a while because you understood it too well, too quickly! As someone who engages with the story similarly to you, on both the character level and the deep story/analysis level, I want to make what is a pretty contrarian argument these days: that the Epilogues are A. good, and B. canon. They're a tough read for sure, but I think someone who reads the story as deeply and pays as much attention as you do will really appreciate what they're trying to do. The Epilogues were also the last time that Hussie was directly involved with the story, and I think if you read them now it's very clear that the story is the culmination of ideas he was thinking about from very early in Homestuck (He said for years before the comic finished that he planned some kind of epilogue). The whole "dubiously canon" concept was part of a failed experiment on his part to try to step away and empower the fandom - the people who actually worked on the comic in that era always treated it as canon and referred to it as such. I consider the Epilogues the final canonical chapter of Homestuck - at a bare minimum I think it should be thought of as Hussie's take on a post-Homestuck fanfic, and I think it deserves attention. Of course I also think the story is good and interesting, which a lot of people don't, so, it's all a matter of opinion, but, as someone who's been following your liveblog and respects your reading of the comic a lot, I wanted to at least throw my hat into the ring on the subject. Incredibly excited to see what you make of act 6!

I really appreciate this honest, impassioned, genuine defense of the Epilogues. It's not the only one I've been sent, either - and quite a few of the others have also cited my analytical style as a reason why I might get more out of them than I realize. I can't pretend I'm not at least a little intrigued.

I've been thinking a lot about Homestuck's tie-in material while drafting my response to this message, and after some serious consideration, I've decided that I'm going to change my planned approach to the Epilogues.

I originally planned to read it in a more casual, less analytical manner, and potentially transition to a full liveblog if and only if I'm sufficiently engaged. Instead, however, I'm going to do the opposite, respecting the faith its defenders have in it by giving it the complete liveblogger's treatment from the very beginning.

I reserve the right to transition back to a casual read if I'm not enjoying myself, of course! But, rest assured, I'll only do that after giving the Epilogues a real, good-faith college try.

[sparkles-rule-4eva]

Idk if I'm gonna make a review post, exactly, but the things that went on with Sonic's character in movie 3 have left me reeling, and dying to analyze. I don't have many screenshots to share, and the ones I do aren't good quality bc the movie's not released digitally yet, but here goes.

For one, the theme of dealing with grief was so well handled. I was hoping they were going to use the parallel of this Sonic losing someone close to him, just like Shadow had, and that's just what they did. What made it even more painful, however, was how Sonic was faced with the possibility of losing a second parental figure.

Shadow saw him hunched over Tom, pleading with him to wake up, and remembered himself doing the same when Maria had died. That was where Shadow saw a bit of himself in Sonic.

Shadow took mental notes of it, but he didn't back off, though he didn't make any other attempts to hurt Tom. Heck, he wouldn't have attacked in the first place if Tom hadn't been disguised as Walters.

And just... watching the way Sonic just started spiraling after this scene was so heartbreaking. The way he looked so lost and broken as they were taking him away in the ambulance, when Maddie didn't say anything to them, and the camera just zoomed out for a few seconds, showing him and his brothers looking so small and so lost in the world as they were left alone, unsure if their dad would be okay.

Sonic didn't want comfort. After the initial fear and grief, the anger he'd felt earlier when he turned on Shadow came back with a vengeance, quite literally. Looking at their calmer, almost normal everyday life earlier in the movie, it seems everything's fine. Sonic seemed fine and perky. I was taken aback at how calm he was about finding his old cave. He seemed fine, all things considered from earlier in his life. The Before Times, as fanfics have dubbed them.

But the moment his found family was threatened, the moment he was faced with the possibility of losing the home and love he'd finally gotten after so many years of pain and isolation, he fell apart. He became aggressively protective of it. Of course he would want to defend those he loves, but not like this. Not the Sonic we know.

The way Shadow phrased it later, "What kind of hero abandons his friends to seek revenge? Abandons his family?"

That struck a nerve, but Sonic just snapped back, "Don't you dare talk about my family."

The expressions he had after he'd taken the Master Emerald and gone after Shadow were so complex. You can see the mix of emotions on his face. Most clearly, the anger. But mixed in, you see the pain, the grief, the paralyzing fear of losing someone else, and you see how emotionally fragile he really is.

Shadow scoffs about how he'd thought that Sonic cared for them. "Especially the one, what's his name again? Tom?"

And that pushed him over the edge.

The way he just let out that chilling scream of rage and grief and went on to punch Shadow so hard he quite literally sent him flying straight into the moon. He was enraged. He was distressed. He was spiraling. And he was, for a few minutes, completely out of control.

We know that this version of Sonic is not so reserved about killing people, like the game version. In the second movie, Sonic had every intention of killing Robotnik in the final battle, and he thought he succeeded. This marks the second time that if someone threatens Sonic's family, he's out for blood. In that vein, he's like his game counterpart; it's the safety of his loved ones, not himself, that he's concerned about. Passionate about.

Except.

He could not bring himself to do it.

I think part of him was remembering what Walters had said about Shadow having experienced loss, the way he had.

He'd won here. He could've just killed Shadow right then and there. Shadow was even goading him into just doing it. Demanded what he was waiting for. Pointing to his own chest and yelling that he was right there. To just do it. (Another thing to analyze; Shadow was just done with everything and didn't even care if he died at this point, but that's for another post.)

But something was stopping him.

Even in those screenshots, you can see the pain and anger mixed on his face. I could be mistaken, but it looks like there's a tear in his eye. (If I'm right, the idea of him crying during this fight makes me break apart in sadness.)

And then came the flashback. This is what drives me insane.

In Sonic Adventure 2, Shadow is out to destroy the world, and it's remembering Maria's true final wish that stopped him.

I never could've predicted that in this version, it was Sonic who was out to kill someone, kill Shadow, but remembering Tom's words to him about not letting his pain change who he is was what stopped him. Sonic was the one who needed to stop and remember. And that's just what he did. 🥺

And then, only then, was he able to calm down, remember himself, remember what Tom would want him to do. He wasn't handling this the same way he'd handled Longclaw's death. He was turning into exactly what Shadow had become. The horror at realizing what he'd nearly become, what he'd almost done, set in.

He made the right choice in the end because of that. Just like Shadow did in the games. Just like he later did here, too. But Shadow was able to have "redemption" of sorts in this version, not because of some talk, but because he saw the example in Sonic, right in front of him.

We know what happened next, I'm not gonna go much into it. But seeing this whole side of Sonic, the side that just barely slipped out in the last movie, was so, so fascinating. I love how each movie continues to explore him as the main character, in a different way. This one probably got me crying the most. I cried even as I wrote this post and put more pieces together. The more I think about it, the more I love it. 🥹😭💙💛❤️

[hellsamethyst]

im listening to my jjk themed playlist(literally just a playlist of songs that reminds me of jjk characters and/or gives me certain jjk character vibes- most of it being nsfw ngl) and die with a smile by bruno mars ft lady gaga is playing, right?

who does my mind immediately think of at this current moment? not any of the jjk characters, that's for sure!

instead, my mind goes to lnds sylus

i can picture two scenarios

the first being sylus and mc asleep in bed together, he has a nightmare of losing mc and he wakes up in a cold sweat, chest heaving like he's struggling to breathe, sitting up, attempting to stay silent but he's panicking, terrified out of his mind. he doesn't scare easily but this dream, this nightmare felt all too real. his gaze trails over to mc, his crimson eyes studying her closely, making sure she's still there next to him, still breathing. mc wakes up and finds him sitting upright, staring at her with an intense gaze. she's concerned, of course, and sits up, her hands immediately reaching out to cup his cheeks, her thumbs gently brushing against his skin, her soft voice, laced with sleep, asking if he was alright, did he have a bad dream. sylus attempts to deflect, tries to brush it off as nothing but mc knows something's up, something's wrong. she urges him to speak about it until he finally relents, telling her about his nightmare. her gaze softens and she pulls him into her arms, reassuring him that she's very much alive, promising she'll always be next to him. from that moment on, they are completely inseparable, spending every day, every night together, loving each other sweetly, wholly, both sylus and mc reminding the other they'll never leave, never stray too far, never go somewhere where the other can't follow

the other scenario is similar, but instead of sylus having the nightmare, it's mc. she jolts awake, her eyes welling up with tears, her heart positively aching. the nightmare felt so real, so concrete that she wakes sylus up by grabbing his hand, gripping it tightly. he immediately knows something's wrong, knows his beloved is feeling overwhelmed. he sits up with her and pulls her onto his lap, his arms instinctively wrapping around her, crushing her against his chest, his hands tangling gently in her hair. he doesn't make her speak, he can already guess what she's dreamed about, he knows her too well. instead, he sits in silence, holding her, soothing her, and if he does speak, it's only to whisper his love for her, to hum a song just for her ears and her ears alone. he presses her head against where his heart rests, letting its beating reassure her that he's here, and he's not going anywhere. from this point on, mc loves him wholly, fiercely, more than she had before. she'd constantly, consistently shower him with her affection, whether its holding his hand or arm out in public, writing love notes and planting them around the base for him to find, sending him messages reserved only for his eyes and his heart, or laying together in the stillness of the night, basking in each other's company. she would make sure he'd never doubt her devotion, her love, her adoration for him, just as he'd do the same for her

[smile-files]

one of the most fascinating aspects about henry's character, to me, is how often he doesn't respond to what's being said to him.

as in his conversation with hershel in the flashback, he seems to be typically stilted when talking, at least to people he isn't particularly close to, which i suspect is a social ineptitude stemming from what was likely inadequate socialization as a child - as he was literally raised as a servant. if henry feels like there's nothing for him to say, he'll say nothing, even if the social norm would be to fill the silence: he had nothing to say to hershel after a while, and so he said nothing, prematurely ending their conversation - even if this proceeded to make hershel feel rather awkward. henry doesn't care about that sort of thing... he can thus be rather terse...

however, this confrontation with dalston seems different: henry's overall quiet demeanor is still at play, yes, but surely he'd have something to say to dalston! he's literally being accused of wanting randall dead! well, as he was raised a servant, you'd imagine henry would've learned to keep himself composed at all times: and as we later know, henry was incredibly sensitive as a child, but became much more reserved and distant as he aged. and so he tries to remain calm and collected, even when the most hurtful things are being said to him...

...though eventually, as one would suspect, there's only so much of this abuse henry can take. he finally lashes out in defense, but all he can muster is "you're wrong!", with no further explanation. henry is terrible at selling himself as a good person through words, even if his actions are the noblest - in general, henry seems to care more about the latter anyway, but in moments like these where he feels others question his motives (in particular, his dedication to and love for randall), there is little he can do to defend himself. one cannot be surprised, as he wasn't raised to make excuses, but to do right from the beginning.

and once the confrontation is over, henry retreats back to his quiet, composed shell, not wanting to talk to angela about what happened. once again he will plead the fifth...

[tf2occontest]

Katherine Slyvia / The Burglar VS The Mecha

(Full matchup list here)

Alright team, here's a recap: This is a contest to determine who amongst you will take the top of the leaderboards and be hired at TFI! Simply put, whoever gets the most votes gets to move on, and whoever doesn't... Well. They'll be put down swiftly and cleanly. :}

So, mann your stations, because here are your next contestants! Vote for your favorite mercenary who you want to win the TF2 OC Contest! - P

OC INFO UNDER THE CUT!

We highly encourage you to take a peek to make your decision!

Katherine Slyvia / The Burglar

@kleptomaniask

Image credit: @/shepswrath

Katherine Slyvia - or Kat, to those who know her, is quite the character. Born and shortly raised in Salt Lake City, Utah, She skipped town very young, after years of confinement… if only to menace several American states and almost get caught in a heist at the Met. Fearing the Law was now aware of her, she hopped the pond and landed in Europe, where she went from country to country and continued to silently torment anyone who didn't know to keep everything bolted to the ground. She's especially trained at the art of theft, deadly quiet and intelligent, but she's never been particularly personable. Most people who speak to her find her strange, though they aren't sure if it's the wide-eyed stare or the complete lack of emotional reaction. What they fail to take into account, however, is the empty pocket where their wallet used to be.

The Mecha

@clovert3a

Image credit: @/clovert3a

Meet The Mecha!

Born around Osaka, Japan, the Mecha is the not-so-typical nerdy girl with her gigantic robots and mech suits and a reserved personality. When you need a tank to absorb bullets and protect a team, she is one of your best bets. With her 20-foot mech suit, her shield, and machine gun, she can become quite a threat to the enemy team. She is best used to lead a charge and absorb potential damage for her teammates, with her mech’s HP being 400 (overheal being 550).

Mecha’s main weakness is (like Heavy’s) her lack of speed. Because of her large mech size, she is unable to run off quickly from danger (especially when firing her machine gun or spreading her shield). But! When she uses her ability, Auto-Pilot, this isn’t an issue anymore.

Auto-Pilot is Mecha’s ultimate ability and must be charged up by the amount of damage she shields from her teammates. Auto-Pilot is when Mecha puts her mech on “auto-pilot” and jumps out of her mech to fight in the battle on her own. She isn’t fully vulnerable though, as her speed is only slightly lower than the Scout’s (120%) and she has her trusty Tachi sword which can do a lot of damage in the right circumstance.

Mecha’s typical primary weapon is her machine gun (while in mech), out of mech her primary weapon is a Glock 17 (full-sized handgun). Mecha’s typical secondary weapon is an AR-15 (in mech and out of mech). Her typical melee weapon is either her Tachi sword or her Katana.

Mecha was born in Osaka, Japan. The exact location is unknown, even to Mecha herself. She has lived only with her single father, and Mecha has been told that her mother passed away from childbirth and her father doesn’t like talking much about it, so that’s all she knows. She was raised with the intention that one day she’d become a mercenary. And that is what happened. She started doing mercenary work alongside her father at the young age of 13. She would use her high intellect and passion for robotics and machinery to aid her in battle. Things she’d create such as new and “improved” weapons she had stolen from her dad, drones, etc.

After years of her mercenary work she one day, at the age of 16, presented her first ever mech suit to a robotics fair in Tokyo and was asked to move to Australia and learn more about robotics and engineering there. She took the offer and stayed in school for 3 years. After 3 years of schooling, she surprised her dad one day by visiting him and telling him how she’d continue mercenary work with his help.

Now her father after a few years of working with him, wants Mecha to go off on her own without him. Hence why she's now applying to work at the RED team!

[zarohk]

These also work really well if the characters are twinborn, and provide some excellently symbolic synergies.

Jake: Storing health means heccan recover from anything, if he has the reserves. He needs forewarning, and it costs him a lot in a way that he’ll never get back, and eventually he runs out of recovery, but that happens far later than the rest of the characters.

Rachel: Storing strength means not much to add here, just the Rachel isn’t good at waiting, biting her time, and putting away her strength for later, even when it can be a great advantage.

Tobias: Always storing senses when he’s not burning tin. Perpetually storing away his sight for later. No wonder his head is in the clouds, if half his senses are being stored instead of used at any given moment.

Cassie: Stores wakefulness for Times when she’s running on too little sleep, and too little energy. More than any of the other animals, Cassie just keeps going even when the other is wood or do collapse (likd #29). She’s the Animorph who genuinely relaxes the most, putting away alertness and paranoia for a future time. Cassie is able to store away a lot of the tension that the others just have to live with, or even embrace, and that’s what lets her be as observant and think so clearly.

Marco: Stores youth, or at least could in theory. He’s always having to choose whether to save a bit of his youthfulness for the future, or burn up that energy to continue to see the bright clear line. He does still store that you away, with his dreams of being famous, of living in a Hollywood mansion, surrounded by babes and expensive cars. Temporary moments of a lost childhood that he will never get back, but he certainly can reclaim as moments.

Ax: Stores fullness, nutrition, and calories which he can tap into so he can stay on mission without having to stop for food or drink, allowing him to ignore caring for himself, ignore the needs of his body and any sort of delay from being the perfect soldier. Stay on a stakeout out all night and day. It also means that he can eat as much as he wants of whatever he enjoys, then store the fullness and keep eating! He could probably even eat two whole trays of cinnamon buns!

I'm curious after seeing the ask about adding a Mistborn character to Animorphs, what if it was the other way around?

Which other property do you think the Animorphs would be most interesting or effective in, if they got inserted into that setting/universe? How would they change things?

What comes to mind for Animorphs in the Cosmere is going back to the original premise of Final Empire, where every member of the crew is a different type of Misting. So with that in mind...

Jake: Augur, or gold-burner. He's constantly looking to his own past, obsessive about revisiting mistakes and trying to learn from every single success or failure. Plus, it's the kind of ability that — much like Jake's strengths — would go unnoticed in most people for their entire lives. I love the detail that gold is the only metal stated to be toxic, because heaven knows that the past will rot you from the inside out if you don't figure out how to excise it fast enough.

Rachel: Pewterarm, or pewter-burner. Because her greatest strength isn't her raw power, but rather her ability to take a hit and yet keep going. She's scared but chooses not to flinch, injured but chooses not to be hurt, and worried but chooses to be bold. Not only that, but pewter's the only metal (that we know of) that addicts the user — it's basically a fantasy amphetamine. Rachel knows that she's accruing an ever-greater cost when the battle winds down, but it's a hit she's willing to take.

Tobias: Tineye. Duh.

Cassie: Seeker, or bronze-burner. I would argue that her greatest strength is not so much changing others' emotions (e.g. Soothing, Rioting) as it is understanding what those emotions are. Yes, she can manipulate people when pushed to do so — but her greatest strength is discernment, or being able to glean an understanding of others' abilities and motivations through careful observation.

Marco: Seer, or atium-burner. He sees the bright clear line between the present and the future, and he can chart other people's minds but will never understand the little details that make all the difference. His ability would also go undiscovered if not for a specific set of circumstances, and if he hadn't Snapped then he'd still be that soft gentle kid today.

Ax: Slider, or bendalloy-burner. Ax's greatest advantage is his speed, not just at tail-fighting but also at calculation and hacking and picking up new skills. His greatest weakness is his tendency to get paralyzed if forced to make decisions on his own, especially with limited time. Ax can do anything, if just given a second's pause to think.

[solomiracle]

ok but this post got me thinking... their demon forms can come out when they get extremely happy as well? that's so cute!! imagine coming back to the house of lamentation after some time (nightbringer, a few weeks, going to the store for 10 minutes, etc) and once your demon boys see you they get all excited and go into their demon forms as they get up to hug you

[dizzybizz]

i haven't introduced tumbly to my drawtectives oc!!! this is my guy nick nack, he runs a shop where he sells antiques and well... knick knacks.. he loves trinkets n bits n bobs n he is oh so short.

[requiemforthestars]

I agree that it's different that these companions are too friendly from another from the start but a) it's not weird or bad to have written characters that are just willing to cooperate and work together, especially when we're a close tight knit group and b) sure, while some more interpersonal conflict would be nice at times, the fandom has been clamoring for companions who are actually friends with each other for 15 years??? Like the complaints about DA2 and DAI are always like "why do these people hate each other after seven years?"/"the Inquisition's inner circle feel like coworkers" and those are of course valid complaints and yes, there's a balance between everyone being friends and people hating each other but this is also kind of what the fandom asked for. People still say to this day that DA2 is a found family game, now we have a found family game. Turns out everyone hates it.

[cuteniarose]

ATLA for the ask game!!

*stares blankly at my screen as I try to remember the last time I've felt any strong emotion for an AtLA character*

(no genuinely those guys just kinda Exist to me istg I’m not invested even when I’m actively rewatching the show)

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most) – This one’s easy: Azula. One does not simply go through their teenage years as a severely mentally ill girl with a shitty dad and emotionally absent mom who favours the other child and end up normal about Azula lmao. I need any and every canon media to leave her the fuck alone. No I do not have a vision as to what happens to her post canon. Yes I do think that what the creators went with sucks ass and thus is not canon in my multiverse thank you very much

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped) – Appa. Just Appa. As a bonus, baby Appa. I need a plush of him more than I need to breathe (though Hanička might get to it so.. how good that idea is may be debatable). Oh, and The Duke. Have you ever seen him hugging Toph in the background of the last episode (I believe)?? Babies, absolute babies, they deserve the world, your honour

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave) – …. Mai? I feel like Mai doesn’t get enough love in the fandom. My current objective is trying to get the friend I’m making watch AtLA for the first time like her :P

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week) – Okay, I’m gonna be honest, I’ve thought over this one for a good 20 minutes and haven’t been able to come up with anything because I Genuinely Do Not Care That Much, but during this past rewatch I’ve been doing with my friends I have had a *Leonardo DiCaprio pointing meme* moment at every reference to Yangchen thanks to A CERTAIN SOMEONE, so… might not be me who never shuts up about her, but she still counts (though I did go on a small infodump when my friend asked me “which one’s that one?” during the Avatar State montage in Book 2 Episode 1, so… perhaps there is more of a case to be made here). Oh, and Smellerbee. I wanna know what Smellerbee’s deal is. No one ever talks about Smellerbee :/

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave) – Hama. Partially for Ming-Hua related reasons, partially because I’m obsessed with the concept of bloodbending (and yet cannot give two shits about Amon or Tarrlok 🤔 Hm, correction: the concept of bloodbending women :D), partially because I wholeheartedly believe that she was brought back to the South Pole and she and Kanna got to be lesbians together for whoever many years they had left – side note, how come every bloodbending woman is a lesbian? – and there’s a certain subsection of the fandom who have proven to not be able to be normal about victims of colonisation, hence the “problematic” category. (Also… not a character, but the Great Divide is a fun episode and you all are way too mean about it. Yes, it does have some.. questionable implications, but all the arguments about how it doesn’t further the plot are stupid as fuck because IMO, if we have time for half a dozen random Fire Nation adventures and a whole episode dedicated to Zuko’s sob story and the trashfire that Ember Island Players is, we have time for the Great Divide. Argue with a wall)

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason) – Zuko. This is because I do not like him. No further commentary lest this fandom tear me to pieces. And Jet. This is also because I do not like him. And Sokka. But I actually do like him, I just think it’s funny when he suffers (/affectionate)

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell) – Pakku. It has been 11 years since I watched AtLA for the first time and never once have I been convinced that Kanna actually married him. Absolutely not, to superhell with you. If there’s any NWT waterbender who deserves to get with Kanna, it’s Yugoda. Hama/Kanna/Yugoda polycule when???

[stellerssong]

ok sorry the OTHER thing about lucienne is like. as previously stated she is dream's handpicked emissary from the waking world to the dreaming she's the diplomat in chief she's the translator she's the bridge. because the dreaming is, in a very real way, dream's own psyche, this is tantamount to giving lucienne a tremendous degree of access to his interiority and by transitive property also tantamount to entering into a deeply emotionally intimate relationship with her (unimportant for the purposes of this post whether that relationship is platonic or romantic).

now, in general, looking at the pattern of dream's close emotional relationships—dream doesn't share himself with people as a rule (beyond the access that all things that live have to the dreaming; but i'm talking about his self here, the one he doesn't like to acknowledge he even has), but when he does share with people, it's with people who have some shadow on the soul, so to speak. just looking at attested relationships in show canon, his deepest emotional connection seems to be with death, who embodies the duality of light and dark even better than he does himself. calliope is the muse of epic poetry—heroism and tragedy—and also bears the sort of divine pride that led her to cut dream off for hundreds or thousands of years when he wronged her. the less said about that other guy, the better, but he's no sunshine-rainbows-unicorns type—he's a soldier of fortune, a bandit and a killer, a man who profits from the sale of human life. even best bird matthew, in comix canon, had a sordid past that will maybe be partially retconned for the show but has still been gestured at.

dream likes the complicated ones. he's drawn to them. they speak to something in him that he won't acknowledge in himself (he has to be Whole, fully integrated, without reservation, because he is the king and he is the dreaming and if the dreaming ain't whole then the universe is in trouble—but he feels that ache nonetheless).

all that is to say: when people try to portray lucienne as dream's Designated Well-Adjusted Neurotypical Friend, i begin to harm and maim.

[askbensolo]

Journal Entry #44: one stayed, one swayed, one strayed

So I may have made a mistake. Amalia and I had planned a holocall to catch up (because I suck at replying to messages), and...I asked if she wanted to see Fannie, too. Since she’s here and everything.

I knew Amalia hadn’t spoken to Fannie or Luke for a long time. But they always ask me how she’s doing, since I’m the only one she still talks to. They clearly still care about her, even if she doesn’t think so. I don’t know—I just figured I’d ask.

And much to my surprise…she agreed. As long as I was going to be there, she said.

And you know what? It actually started out okay. Like I said…Amalia’s a lot more mellow now. She’s still herself, in the same way that I’m still me despite not being an emo boi anymore—but she does seem to care about people more, and there’s just more light in her eyes when she engages with you.

There was some chit-chat between me and Fannie and Amalia about what we’ve all been up to. I was feeling really proud of Mal. I know she’s got some issues with the Jedi and everything, and it must have taken a lot for her to be willing to talk to Fannie again.

What I don’t understand, is that Fannie must have known that too. So...I was shocked when Fannie just...went for the throat, and asked Amalia if she still didn't want to be a Jedi.

I think I mentioned to you how Amalia has developed some different beliefs on the Force. She thinks the Force must be a person rather than a thing. Like…some sort of divine spiritual being, I guess. And again, I say: don’t ask me about that stuff—not my lane, buddy. I just live here.

All I know is, she seems happier this way, thinking of the Force as someone who cares about her, and I thought Fannie would be happy for her, too. I mean…I am. But...she wasn't.

“Amalia…the Force isn’t a person,” Fannie said, sounding confused. “The Jedi have never believed the Force is a person.”

“Well, that’s why I’m not a Jedi,” said Amalia.

“The Jedi have passed down their ancient knowledge and wisdom for centuries. Do you really think they were all incorrect?”

“The Jedi have also passed down many mistakes and corrupt practices,” Amalia countered. “They were incorrect in that. Who’s to say there weren’t other things they got wrong? Or things that got twisted along the way? The Jedi were mortal. The Force is not. I follow the Force now, Fannie. Not the Jedi.”

“The Jedi do follow the Force,” Fannie argued. “The Jedi Order, despite its failings, has been a firm foundation for many years for all who would follow the Force—”

“All? Or just those with a high enough Force sensitivity?” Amalia asked.

“Well, yes, I suppose the life of a Jedi is specifically for those with a special ability to sense the Force, like you and I,” Fannie conceded, “but isn’t that all the more reason why you should have stayed? You were given a gift. It seems a shame to waste it."

"You just said someone gave me a gift," pressed Amalia. "Who did, if not a person?"

You know me. I’m all for debating the esoteric. But I was starting to get a little stressed about them fighting. One of them was a good friend because she shared my darker sense of humor and the feeling of being kind of an outcast. And one of them I was kinda hoping would be my girlfriend soon.

"Okay, ladies, break it up," I said. "I mean, come on. Who can really know anything about the Force for sure?"

"Every one of us can, if we seek to know the Force," said Amalia, with the urgency of one sharing a profound revelation.

"The Jedi know the Force," said Fannie, with the zeal of one defending a sacred institution. "They have studied it for generations."

"Why don't you guys just accept that you, you know, each see things a little differently, and move on?" I suggested, with the pragmatism of one who’d given up trying to understand the galaxy a long time ago. "It seems to be working out great for each of you, even if you guys believe different things. And who knows, maybe both of you are kind of right."

Amazingly enough, then they both turned on me.

"We can't both be right, Solo," Amalia said. "Our beliefs about the Force are pretty mutually exclusive."

"There is only one truth," agreed Fannie. "Your eyes couldn't be brown and blue at the same time."

"Well, what if I had one eye that was brown, and one eye that was blue, and each of you were sitting on either side of me—" I started to say, but as clever as I thought this little parable was, it did not go over well with the girls.

"Oh please. Not that 'blind men and the bantha' crap," Amalia groaned.

"There would still be only one truth—that you had a brown eye and a blue eye, rather than fully brown or fully blue—and both of us would be wrong," Fannie said.

"Okaaay," I said, "but you'd still both be half right—"

"Which would still make us both wrong," Amalia said.

"Look, is it really that important what the Force is or isn't like?" I asked impatiently.

"Yes!" Fannie and Amalia said at the same time.

"The Force is the giver of all life, watching over us, working all events toward our good, loving us despite our darkness, giving us the will and the strength to do what's right," said Amalia. "I didn't know how to have hope or joy or love for myself or anyone else, until I discovered that the Force made me on purpose and gives a damn about me."

"The Force is the energy that flows through each of us and every living creature, and in the influence we wield over the world, whether for good or evil," said Fannie. “If you are not in tune with it, you are not in tune with yourself or others or the rest of nature.”

"The Force is out there, sure, but I don't see why it's so worth bothering about," I said. “Seems like it kinda just does what it wants. I mean, it doesn’t seem to want anything to do with me. And if I’m honest? I don’t really want anything to do with it, either.”

Fannie and Amalia both stared at me, frustrated. I didn't understand why they thought I was so wrong. I was the only one here not trying to get everyone else to change their mind. I was totally okay with Amalia believing what she wanted to and Fannie believing what she wanted to as long as I could believe what I wanted to and somehow that made me the bad guy?

We were all quiet for a bit, until Fannie broke the silence.

“I don’t understand,” she said, shaking her head. “We all learned the same things from Master Luke. All three of us.”

Amalia and I exchanged glances.

“Well...I just don’t think that what Luke taught was true,” Amalia said, her words brusque, but her tone uncharacteristically gentle. “Not because he’s a liar. Because he’s misguided. I think he learned and taught an incorrect understanding of the Force.”

“I just don’t really care what’s true because my life is just work and rent and whatever little time I get to myself to have fun, and the last time I was interested in the Force I got super abused and manipulated,” I said.

“But we used to all accept the same things as truth,” said Fannie. "I just...don't know what's different."

“We were younger then. People change as they grow up. Not everyone believes the same things at twenty-five that they did at fifteen,” Amalia said.

“I’ve sure changed a lot. Not just regarding the Force, but all over,” I said.

Fannie sighed, and started to look a little sad. And then...I felt an impression brush up against the outside of my mind—it was the three of us, at Luke's school: Amalia and I a little smaller than we were right now and Fannie exactly the same size, hair and lekku and montrals all a little shorter—the three of us, dressed in Jedi robes, Fannie's with the ruffles she'd sewn on, mine plain and rough and ugly, Amalia's with the sleeves cut short—sitting in the grass and comparing notes scrawled from lessons with Uncle Luke—discussing the light side of the Force and the dark, meditating together—Amalia and I goofing off while Fannie tried in vain to reel us back in—Fannie and I teaming up to talk Amalia away from the deep end when she was losing her mind—me watching in absolute jealousy while Fannie and Amalia sparred—Fannie's saber against the saber that was once Amalia's but now sat sadly on a special shelf in my uncle's office—Amalia had no idea how often I'd caught Luke gazing wistfully at it, back when I used to still meet with him for counseling—

All that in a flash, and then I turned and looked and saw it all in Fannie’s eyes, and my heart felt heavy for her. And I realized that...letting Amalia and I go our own way was a sort of bitter loss for Fan, a source of grief that I couldn’t really understand—but I could feel it—an anchor dragging her below the surface—my friend, the girl I loved, the girl with the great big heart like an open wound, the girl who yearned for the galaxy to make sense.

I put my arm around her shoulder without really thinking about it, and brushed the backs of my fingers against her cheek to comfort her. And gave her a little nudge like, hey, things are okay, I’m still here, right?

“Oh my frick,” said Amalia, who I’d temporarily forgotten about, in a tone of voice like she was witnessing the eighth wonder of the galaxy. “I had to see it to believe it. But I just saw it, and I still don’t know if I believe it.”

Fannie and I looked at each other uncomfortably. We hadn’t been planning to tell her. Or anyone, really. Not for a while. But acting close with each other had just become sort of natural to us. I withdrew my arm and Fannie scooted ever-so-slightly further away from me.

Amalia shook her head. “I mean. Look. Sure. You guys are kind of cute, not gonna lie. But I’m just gonna say it: you two shouldn’t be together.”

I was stunned. That was really so not her business.

“Okay. Cool. Who asked you?” I replied, more than a little annoyed.

“Nobody, but you know that I always say what I think, just like you do, Ben,” she said. “Think about the whole conversation we’ve just had. I mean. Do you guys not see how incompatible your worldviews are? Do you not think you’re gonna have issues down the line trying to reconcile your values?”

I looked at Fannie, almost afraid she’d agree. But she looked upset, and not agreeable in the least, and I felt better. I turned back to Amalia's hologram.

“We have a lot of differences, yeah. But we’re willing to work through them and accept each other as we are, and that’s that,” I said stiffly.

“Ben’s been through a lot,” said Fannie. “I can forgive that he has trouble connecting with the Force.”

“Hey, I’ve been through a lot, too!” said Amalia. “But I still believe in something. I believe in something, Fannie—he doesn’t believe in anything. And he doesn’t have trouble connecting with the Force—that man is sprinting in the opposite direction as fast as he freaking can.”

“Hey, I said I believe in the Force,” I said defensively. “It’s pretty hard not to, when people can use it to make things float and stuff.”

“And he’s Luke’s own nephew, for goodness’ sake!” Fannie said.

“He's also the grandson of one of the biggest Sith Lords who ever lived. But I don’t think it really matters who he’s related to, or if he believes the Force exists, if he doesn’t care,” said Amalia. “Be honest with yourself, Fannie. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone who doesn’t have a purpose and doesn’t know why he’s alive, except to make money and have fun?”

“Listen, Mal,” I said. “Not all of us are cut out for seeing the grand scope of some cosmic order and imagining we have a part in it. Some of us just wanna live our lives—”

But Fannie interrupted me.

“You’re jealous, Amalia,” she said, unusually nasty, unusually venomous. We both stared at her. “You’re jealous. You’re jealous! You liked him, too. I know you did. And you’re jealous that he chose me.”

That seemed to hit kind of a nerve with Amalia. I’m not sure why. Either it was true…or it was so untrue that it pissed her off to even hear the idea suggested. She raised her brow and sucked in her cheeks and blinked a little, as if to say…well, damn, alrighty then.

“…Okay,” she said, sounding less-than-friendly, but less-than-frigid. “Weeell. That sounds like a great place to call it quits. Nice talking with you both, and I wish y’all the best. Talk to you later, Ben. And, Fannie…good luck.” And then she signed off, before I could even say anything.

I looked at Fan desperately, hoping we could have some kind of debrief, but…she stood up with a huff and stormed off too.

Geez. Three things that are complicated: 1) religion, 2) growing up, and 3) girls.

[aromanticasterisms]

my god okay when jing yuan gave us the abacus i thought that would see use in like an endgame sort of nanook fight situation not THE NEXT ARC. are you kidding me. okay post canceled i finished penacony

[giantkillerjack]

ur post about queerbaiting and the dismissal of people in fandom to critical analysis is so incredibly true thank you. i feel like marcille's writing in the anime has been super misogynistic a lot of the time and every time i bring this up all anyone wants to say is "well maybe this isn't for you! and you shouldn't watch the show!" like. i don't think this is about taste lmao, i am analyzing the text in front of me and coming to conclusions about the craft of it.

[This is in reference to this post]

YES!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

It is so so frustrating!!!!

It's like being at a restaurant and being served a bunch of delicious appetizers, but then one of the bread appetizers is literally just a plate of crumbs; and then when you're like, "Hey, uhh, why are we being served literal crumbs?", a bunch of the other folks eating at the restaurant are like,

"WELL HOW ABOUT YOU JUST DON'T EAT HERE THEN??!? YOU MUST NOT BE THAT HUNGRY, SO JUST FIND ANOTHER RESTAURANT AND DON'T EAT WITH US!!"

And maybe they say it politely, but "Aw, sorry, maybe this restaurant just isn't for you 💖" is just trading out an aggressive dismissive tone for a patronizing dismissive tone. It's the same message.

And it's like! I was honestly happy to move on from the crumbs once my complaint was acknowledged because the meal overall is still delicious, but then all these folks got SUPER WEIRD AND DEFENSIVE ABOUT IT, so now I find myself double-checking all the other dishes -- and, actually, you know what those eggs DO look a Iittle misogynistic undercooked!!!!

[neomachine]

shots of carter and leo i wish were in trakkena's revenge