#and the amount of ppl literally being so rude over this

[kisskisskisskisskiss]

The comments and replies on this are astounding like why in the actual fuck are you all fighting like children on a topic this complex.

Like please for the love of god stop fuckin fighting over this girl math shit. Do you all realize that the point of cultural analysis and critique is to point out patterns in culture and why they exist and not use them to attack others and that the reason it will not convince anyone is bc they can use the same shit or make their own critiques back? Like we live in a culture obsessed with this notion that there is a Science to Existence when culture very clearly can never be boiled down to something that concrete.

Your views on this trend if "girlification" hold meaning and are important but they dont make you more correct or morally superior. You are not a better person for hating these trends but also if you are taking these critiques personally maybe you need to uhhh....get a fucking grip? And maybe look inward and understand why you are so attached to these ideas of femininity and, if you really see it as survival or reclaimation, why do you feel the need to scream and cry and act fucking insane online about it?????

Its even fuckin weirder that any of yall arguing about it are doing it through this lense that you are more Right for it. It's like you have genuinely zero understanding of experiences outside your own but instead of trying to use that to grow, you're getting into screaming matches on tumblr and twitter about it like a bunch of babies.

"girl dinner is when you don't eat teehee" "men think about the roman empire women think about their ex best friends and poetry" "✨sapphic love✨ is so pure and innocent and sweet unlike nasty gross Man Lust" "girl math is when you can buy starbucks and makeup because you didn't buy it yesterday so it's free" "I'm going to explain (complex topic) for the girlies! so basically it's like when you go shopping-" "I love women because they're so soft and smooth and feminine and we can talk about girly things and they're not sweaty or hairy or horny like gross men" "women should be unemployed girls don't need jobs men should do all that for us" "ugh girls that don't like pink or being feminine just need to stop being such pick mes and get over their internalized misogyny it's gross"

god save my hairy dyke ass from this hell before I start whacking people's shins with my Girl Baseball Bat. teehee!

[crismakesstuff]

im so excited for invincible s2b now that it has an official release date… and that release date is march 14th

Let me talk about why that has me worried for the future of the show

‼️also no hate to any other shows mentioned‼️

I want to start with these two images :

invincible compared to the boys and now hazbin hotel has BARELY gotten any offical advertising on this level. The boys also got ads in times square for the promotion of s3 and the spin-off gen v im pretty sure but I could be wrong.

Don’t get me wrong I am rly happy to see an animated show get promotion at that level and I think more streaming services should do the same but why is it that invincible, a show on its SECOND SEASON gets nothing? The official invincible accounts have to do most of the heavy lifting themselves with generating hype on their twt,insta and tiktok. People complain that the accounts often make “an announcement for the announcement” but they have too! They literally have no other option! It sucks to see invincible show signs of a show thats clearly being tampered with by executive fuckery that has led so many other animated shows to an early grave.

Also I NEED people to realize that invincible’s release schedule NOT THE FAULT OF THE CREW

I see people regularly being rude and borderline aggressive to crew members online (which ive seen happen in other fandoms too) but the amount of people that were bitching and whining about the hiatus saying things like “this is why we shouldn’t let animators have good working conditions” and people agreeing with those takes were INSANE. The crew have no control over when the show drops or not, that is a decision left up to executives.

Now why could this delay be happening ?

a little bit ago amazon made this announcement to its customers:

this very well lines up with what many people began to speculate online as to why invincible had such a weird release schedule for season 2. They release the first half and get people hooked on the first 4 episodes ending on a massive cliffhanger and then release the second half after ads are introduced in hopes of making more money bc ppl don’t want ads in the middle of their shows.

Even then many people (myself included) think that it would’ve ultimately been better for the sake of the shows own hype to just wait to release them in March back to back all 8 episodes. Because the midseason break just kneecapped the hype the show had built up so hard and now many people are reasonably frustrated.

Because there was no clarity on when the show would be back. Most people assumed it would be a month long break for the holidays which shows have done for a long time. And then fake leaks came out that the show would come back in early January, and then the invincible accounts were virtually silent, and people were saying the break was intentional for fans to (recover) for ep 4. It was all over the place

What should fans do going forward?

Best thing you can do is stream the show legally if you can! TALK about invincible, don’t let the hype die out. Get this shit on trending ! Boost any official posts online showing that there is still a demand for this show! If you can, buy merch! Read the comics legally ! LET AMAZON KNOW WE STILL CARE ABOUT THIS SHOW!

again no hate to the other shows here bc ive watched all of them! I just want invincible to get some of that love too because this show is so amazing and you can tell how much love the crew has put into it <3

[fettuccin-e]

Make It Bruise

I wanted to see if I could write steven as more of a dom, bc i seem to default to subby!Steven and i think maybe i succeeded?? so yeah we've got a dom steven here my dear ppl

(Tags: Steven Grant x Reader, dom/sub dynamics, afab!fem!reader, spanking like a lot of spanking as 'punishment,' fingering, a bit of Marc x Reader)

Sometimes you’re absolutely convinced that Steven Grant, newly-appointed tour guide and boyfriend extraordinaire, is the most patient man on Earth. With the amount of shit he gets at work, coupled with the seemingly never-ending warzone of his mind, Steven should have every right to be uptight, defensive, even downright rude. But he’s not. Every day he comes home to you, patient and loving; he cooks you dinner, holds your hand, fucks you sweetly with unending focus on your pleasure and comfort.

Steven is a wonderful, patient man, and you love him for it.

But also, sometimes, you just want to see him snap.

It’s only happened a few times; when Donna got on his ass just a bit too much that day, when Marc was being an absolute twit in the headspace. Steven reaches a breaking point, and although you shouldn’t enjoy it as much as you do, you still dream of it, crave it. You love when he loses what little composure he has left, when he comes home to you, shoulders drawn tight and eyebrows furrowed as he orders you to take your panties off and bend over for him. He fucks you like an animal on those days, until you’re crying and boneless and dripping with his cum, voice raw from screaming. 

It’s complete fucking bliss.

So, against your better judgment, you’ve been a brat to Steven all day. Not answering his texts, talking back to him and rolling your eyes. Steven knows you’re not mean-spirited, that you’d never actually want to be rude or genuinely upset him. He knows that you’re doing this entirely on purpose. And as much as people try to underestimate him, Steven isn’t a stupid man. He knows when his baby needs to be put in her place.

It all comes to a head that evening, when the light outside was just starting to fade with the sunset, the both of you getting ready to lay down on the couch to read together.

“Darling, have you seen my glasses?” Steven asks, innocent and soft-spoken. “Can’t seem to find them anywhere.”

You scoff, just a little, before muttering, “Lord Steven, can’t you keep track of them for more than a fucking hour?” And you can see Steven’s broad back straightening minutely as he turns to look at you. 

“Do you ever get tired of it?” He asks, still softly, but his arms are crossing over his chest as he crosses toward you.

You try not to stare at his arms bulging under the thin fabric of his button down. “Tired of what?”

“Don’t act stupid, darling,” Steven says. He stands just a few inches above you, his hand coming up to tilt your chin up toward his face. “Do you ever get tired,” his hand trails lower until his big palm drifts down to your neck, and you gasp as he suddenly grips it tight, “of being an absolute fucking brat?”

“S-Steven,” you whisper, but he interrupts you quickly. 

“Take your fucking clothes off. I’m going to sit on the couch, and you’re going to lay across my lap,” he mutters, his voice dark and completely unlike your normal loving, patient Steven. 

And it’s a terrible decision, maybe one of the worst you’ve ever had, when you say, “And what if I don’t?” 

You can swear that Steven literally growls, gripping your throat even tighter and tugging your face towards his, forcing you up to your tiptoes. “If you don’t, love,” he says the pet name like an insult. “I won’t let you cum for a week. I’ll tell Marc and Jake what you’ve done, how you keep fucking misbehaving, and they won’t let you cum either. And they’re far less forgiving than me, darling, aren’t they?”

You nod with wide eyes, and Steven lets you go. You inhale air into your lungs once again, and nearly whine when Steven goes to sit on the couch. He lifts an eyebrow at you when you stand there, looking at him dumbly, before you remember yourself. You strip yourself quickly, nearly tripping over your pants when you take them off in your rush to get to Steven. 

You drape yourself across his lap, stomach pressing into his thick thighs while your elbows press into the couch cushion next to him. 

“What do you say if you want to stop, darling?” he murmurs, palm held just above your bare ass.

“Red,” you say, and a stinging pain rips up your spine as Steven’s palm comes down hard on your asscheek.

“That’s right, darling, so fucking smart,” he punctuates the last word with another smack, and you choke on a scream as the sting spreads through your body. “Now, sweetheart, I’m going to give you ten-” Steven pauses, and you glance back at him to see that he’s not looking at you, but at the mirror across your living room. Your gaze snaps back forward when he turns back toward you, meeting your eyes briefly. “Marc says I should give you twenty, but I don’t think you could take that, could you, love?”

You shake your head hard, heart beating rapidly at the thought of being subjected to twenty of Steven’s brutal slaps.

Steven chuckles softly at your vehemence, running a soothing hand down your bare back. “We’ll appease him with fifteen, okay?”

The idea of fifteen spanks was still daunting, but you know that Steven’s mind is already made up; you can’t talk him back down to ten. You whisper softly, “Yes, Steven,” and try to brace yourself.

It’s brutal, punishing, the way Steven’s hand comes down on your ass and thighs. He counts every single one, and his slaps seem to get harder and harder with each. Your body lurches forward with every impact, rocking back and forth on his lap. He counts each one, a soft murmur under his breath after every loud smack, and fifteen somehow seems like the biggest number in the world. Tears are starting to drip down your reddened cheeks with the sting of it, little moans and gasps of “Steven!” escaping your lips as he spanks you viciously.

It hurts, it hurts so bad, but you can’t deny the way it also feels so good. Every sting makes your clit pulse, makes your pussy throb uncontrollably. You can’t hide the way your cunt is dripping, completely drenched with your juices. 

And Steven just keeps talking, muttering “such a fucking brat,” while he leaves your ass red and welted. Around slap nine, he asks you, “why are you getting spanked like this, darling?” and you can’t help but cry out, stupid and brainless as you are, “cause I’m a brat, oh god, been so bad to you Steven. I needed to be punished, shit.”

“That’s right, gorgeous,” Steven says, smirking to himself, looking at the state he’s reduced you to. “You’re so smart. Last one, okay?”

You nod, hot tears still streaming down your face as you gulp air into your heaving lungs. Steven’s hand comes down on you one final time, the hardest it’s ever been, and you scream a little bit as Steven mutters a soft, “fifteen.”

You barely have time to recover before Steven’s suddenly stuffing two of his thick, calloused fingers into your sopping pussy, his other hand petting softly across your sensitive ass.

“Steven, Steven, oh fuck, oh fucking Christ,” you slur as Steven’s fingers jam in and out of you ruthlessly, your bruised up ass bouncing as he fucks you savagely. He grinds the pads of his fingers up into your sweet spot buried deep inside, and your hips lurch unconsciously, trying to escape the pleasure that’s too much, it’s too fucking much-

“Don’t run from me, love,” Steven murmurs, his dark eyes watching your writhing, glistening body. He can feel the fluttering of your little pussy around his fingers, and knows that you won’t be able to hold your orgasm for long. But you’re trying, he knows you’re trying to wait for his permission.

Steven glances up at the mirror across the room and makes eye contact with Marc, who has been watching with dark, unwavering eyes as Steven plays with you. Marc nods at him, just barely, and Steven smirks. “Go ahead and cum, darling, Marc and I want to see it.”

You have no choice but to follow Steven’s unyielding command, your body going rigid as your pussy clutches around his fingers, your ass still red hot and throbbing. You’re sobbing and gasping as you cum, and Steven carries you through it, murmuring little affirmations of “you did so good, love, you took it so well.”

The thrusts of Steven’s fingers slowly come to a stop, and he finally removes his fingers, sticky with your slick. He wipes them carelessly on his jeans and lifts you to cuddle you into his chest, shushing you softly as your breathing slowly returns to normal.

“‘M sorry, Steven. I was mean-”

Steven cuts you off gently, running a hand down your naked back as your hands dig into the fabric of his shirt. “You’re forgiven darling. You’re always forgiven, perfect as you are. Love you so much.”

Your eyes are heavy, your body exhausted and wrung dry, but you manage a “love you too, Steven,” before you drop off into sleep, your face buried into the crook of Steven’s neck.

Steven will take care of you. He always does.

[leverage-ot3]

What are your k drama recommendations??!? I need new ones

omg my time has come thank you anon for giving me the opportunity to ramble about shows

I ended up talking WAY too long so I'm putting everything after the first one under the cut

all of us are dead- show about high schoolers as a zombie apocalypse starts. very funny and relatable, literally they call the police and are like 'have you seen train to busan?' bffrrn. has a lot of social commentary and there are references to the sinking of mc sewol (a cruise that sunk where the captain deserted it and left a large amount of high schoolers to drown). commentary about how adults save themselves first/leave youth to fend for themselves. one of my comfort shows and although they didn't intend for more seasons, it was received so well that they have been renewed! I am also an ot4 truther and sometimes talk about them on my international shows sideblog: @nam-on-jo

sweet home- (disclaimer: I am not caught up and have not yet seen s2 which came out a little while ago) honestly I have no idea how to explain this so I'm gonna copy-paste the blurb: as humans turn into savage monsters, one troubled teenager and his neighbours fight to survive and to hold onto their humanity. basically people turn into monsters for [redacted] reasons and everyone in his large apartment building is stuck inside trying to fend for their lives.

my name- I'm just going to paste the blurbs going forward because it's easier: Following her father's murder, a revenge-driven woman puts her trust in a powerful crime boss -- and enters the force under his direction. bro some of these twists I expected but others caught me off guard. I love the main character and am a little gay for her but I think that's valid because she's a bamf. there was a plot point at the end of the second to last episode that I really didn't like and made me very upset. narratively I get why they did it but it made me sad so I'm still pissy. might get around to writing a fix-it fic one day when motivation strikes because my girl deserves better things.

the guest- a detective, a catholic priest, and a psychic join forces to fight crime caused by supernatural forces. not to say they are my ot3 but they kinda are. (other ppl interpret it is a lesbian and her two bi/gay bffs which I also accept but. ot3 tho). LOVED every twist and turn and how the three of them go from not trusting one another to being family. genuinely one of my favorites from all the kdramas I've watched over the years and I want to rewatch it again soon

happiness (tvn)- The residents of a high-rise apartment fight for their lives against a deadly infectious disease while Sae-bom and Yi-hyun try to find the person because of whom the virus spread. bro I adored this. some characters annoyed me (which means they were written effectively) but it has so much. fake dating/marriage (they wanted a better apartment lmao). annoyances to lovers. mean/rude woman soft for sunshine man. what you will do for the people you love. morals and humanity during a catastrophy. *smacks show* you can fit so much into this. no but seriously, I thought this was a really interesting take on the zombie virus! so some of the time you come off completely asymptomatic and 'normal', so people can get away with acting normal and hiding the disease around other people, so the paranoia and mystery is REALLY amped up. had me guessing a LOT. sae-bom and yi-hyun are both cops/detectives and you find out really early (ep 1/2?) that sae-bom is immune which gives a really interesting dynamic that leaves her (to yi-hyun's exasperation and heightened blood pressure levels) to be kinda reckless in the pursuit of truth and salvation. I'm rambling now because this is making me watch to rewatch but yeah as a zombie/dystopia/apocalypse lover this was a good watch. it's more story-focused than violence-heavy which was a cool and refreshing twist

alice in borderland- okay y'all I am aware people had mixed feelings about s2 but overall I did enjoy the series. 'Obsessed gamer Arisu suddenly finds himself in a strange, emptied-out version of Tokyo in which he and his friends must compete in dangerous games in order to survive.' what can I say, I love a dystopian-esque setting.

the silent sea- imma be real, I only watched it for loml bae doona from sense8. 'During a perilous 24-hour mission on the moon, space explorers try to retrieve samples from an abandoned research facility steeped in classified secrets.' basically earth is in severe crisis mode as they run out of water to drink. water has recently been found on the moon, and although there was a mysterious tragedy that happened previously to researchers looking for water in a base on the moon, they have reached a level of desperation where they have another mission to look for moon water. mystery, paranoia, a couple of good twists ensue. I thought it was pretty good even though I have some mixed feelings about the open ending.

semantic error- yes I am sliding a bl into this list. bitch you thought. of course my bl-loving self would mention this (I forgot about it until I looked up good kdramas to remind myself of stuff I have watched). 'A strict, rule-abiding computer science major must work together with an artist with a polar-opposite personality to his.' confident cool boy meets bitch boy. it's great.

and of course...

leverage con artists- I would be fired from running this blog if I didn't mention the beloved korean spinoff of leverage. 'The series follows the story of Lee Tae-joon, a former insurance investigator who forms a team of thieves and con artists to target the rich and wealthy. The team was also formed to avenge Tae-joon's son's death.' I've posted about it before so I won't go super into it but it's VERY camp, a good time, and the ot3 is alive and well. debatable more overt than their predecessor!

other mentionables:

I tried watching kingdom (again for bae doona) but couldn't really get into it. might try again later because it's critically acclaimed (I think) and has even gotten a spinoff series

my roommate really liked mr queen. I didn't really pay attention when we were in the same room and they were watching it but it's fruity

the island on amazon prime was good! interesting plot but not in my top 10 or anything. worth a watch if you're looking for a kdrama to watch in your spare time. features girlboss businesswoman being thrown into a world of the supernatural because [redacted]. supernatural black horse man keeps her safe while keeping a life-changing secret.

let's fight ghost was a thai show that I saw and loved that was adapted into a kdrama called bring it on ghost, but honestly I couldn't get through it because I liked the thai one better.

train to busan is technically a movie but it's iconic and well-known and I highly suggest watching it if you like zombie/apocalypse movies. disclaimer: kdramas do not have the slow 'walker' zombies. they are fucking fast and the stuff of my nightmares. would probably just jump off a bridge if this actually happened ngl

I did think that extraordinary attorney woo was cute. I never finished it and know that there are VERY valid criticisms about the perpetuation of media portraying people with autism in the stereotypical savant ways. however, I liked how the love interest accepted her for who she was, loved her because of who she was and made efforts to accommodate and learn how to comfort her in ways that would work for her

business proposal was pretty decent if you like lighthearted romance- I didn't finish it but would like to at some point

tale of the nine tailed was another one that my roommate and I started watching but never finished. it was alright! just lost interest

shows on my watchlist:

black knight (netflix)- 'In a dystopian future devastated by air pollution, the survival of humanity depends on a group of deliverymen known as the Black Knights who navigate the wastelands using unconventional means.'

copycat killer-

hellbound (netflix)-

shop for killers (hulu)- 'A nephew who lost his parents and grew up in the hands of an uncle who runs a shopping mall faces a new truth after his uncle's sudden death.'

the legend of the blue sea (viki + hulu)- 'A magistrate's plan to release mermaids into the ocean backfires when they're caught by fishermen.' (legit I just miss mermaid media)

gyeongseong creature (netflix)- 'In the city of Gyeongseong in 1945, a group of young people thinking only of their own survival encounter a monster born of human greed and ask themselves what humanity is.'

dark hole (viki)- 'A mysterious black fog from a petrochemical factory's sinkhole turns people into bizarre figures; people who are not infected try to survive in this middle of pandemonium.'

the cursed (multiple)- 'An enthusiastic social issues reporter, fighting against the evil hidden behind an IT conglomerate, meets a teen-age girl who is possessed by a spirit and has special abilities.'

blood (multiple)- 'Dr Park Ji Sang believes in the sanctity of human life, and struggles to treat terminally ill cancer patients and save lives while at the same time being a vampire.'

the ghost detective (viki)- 'In this horror thriller drama, a detective who catches ghosts tries to solve the case of his younger sibling's death with the help of his assistant.'

possessed (netflix)- 'A smart-mouthed detective and a reclusive psychic medium join together to get rid of the ghost of a murder who was executed 20 years ago.'

connect (hulu)- 'A man is kidnapped and one of his eyes removed by a gang of organ hunters; his eyes was transplanted into body of a serial killer; the unwilling donor now has terrible visions as he witnesses terrifying attacks on the residents of Seoul.'

and now just because so many of these only have het romances, I looked up k-dramas with lgbtq representation... (some of these recommendations were from articles from screenrant, movieweb, this subreddit, herzindagi (bl-focused), allkpop)

schoolgirl detectives (viki)- 'Five teenage girls join together to investigate mysterious incidents that occur at their school, as well as help classmate deal with bullying, depression and other crises.'

be melodramatic (netflix, viki)- 'Three 30-year-old best friends, Jinju, Eun-jung and Hanju each pursue different paths in both career and love. Despite life's difficulties, the three friends can always return home at the end of the day and support each other.'

lily fever (available w/subtitles on youtube)- 'The story revolves around the budding relationship between Kim Kyung Ju and Jang Se Rang who meet when Kyung Ju can't find her passport and has to go to her friend's house to try and find it.'

love alarm (netflix)- 'In a world in which an app alerts people if someone in the vicinity likes them, Kim Jojo experiences young love while coping with personal adversities.'

nevertheless (netflix)- 'The story of a romance between a man who is annoyed with relationships but likes to flirt and a woman who wants to date but does not believe in love.' (wlw side couple romance)

[theangryjikooker]

https://www.tumblr.com/theangryjikooker/760173079004692480/im-going-to-assume-youve-never-been-in-a-real?source=share

Let me ask you this anon, you're in rs with your partner for however long u think jikook are and yet your partner needs to tell you what his preferred mattresses are? Given jk had them all over his home that seems like something his partner should be aware of but jm wasn't..... Knwing spices ain't a big thing given jungkook and jimin has known they enjoy spicy food since forever like have y'all not watched their past content? Jk knows jm's taste and vice versa and it would be weird to not know IF u didn't know given these men have shared dorms together for years. These are not the things you should not know about god when u have shared a space with these ppl for long.

Literally in 2022 jm was talking about his depression and how his friend was the one who made understand that and it was news to jk. I don't always expect couples to point out each other's things so it doesn't bother me that someone else pointed it out and not jk but as a supposed "couple" I'd expect jk to already know about this incident. Also wasn't it the same time where jikook told each other their sleep schedule? So would you not expect a couple to already know that? Why does jk not know jm sleeps in the morning and wakes up at noon while jk does the opposite?

Let's go back to July 2023 when jk said he'd pick his shower material and go to jm's room so you think celebrities of jm and jk's calibre won't have eachother's stuff at e/o home given couple usually would stay at others place? Let's go back to April 2023 did jk know any of jm's schedule? Imagine ur own boyfriend not knowing what the fk you're doing at any given moment for MONTHS other than that you're working on ur album? Like even yg knew about it, hsk made sure he knew about it but since jm and jk Hardly called each other jk didn't know about either. He only knew when the SMF2 teaser was dropping which luckily even TH knew when smf2 MV was dropping. what other schedule jk knew of jm? Y'all gonna tell me that u talk with ur boyfriend daily/often yet you don't know he's got 3 music shows to do, he's got a video call event, U haven't heard his songs other than the one you worked on. He literally didn't know anything about jm. I damn well remember how when jm first commented on jk's live jk's first reaction was "How are you?" And things like "Take care of yourself" this that he said it to both jm and hoba compare that with when taehyung commented there and jk was like "what are you doing here?" And it wasn't because he was being rude it was because they were doing something together before this live of jk (could be playing online game or called eachother etc) cause tae said "you said you're going to sleep" like i knew then and there these guys are not as in touch with eachother as they used to. U need to understand the interactions. Y'all mistook tens of their interactions thinking everything is special and romantic when the reality says otherwise. Now this is not me saying tae nd jk knows everything about each other or anything cause i know they might also not be sharing all things with each other but it gives away easily who was more in touch with each other at least for a particular amount of time. And let me tell you one more thing that when jungkook did that jimin centric live he was actually catching up with jimin's content. There's a lot more i can add but imma let u know this much only cause i don't wanna drag it more.

Lmao, I don’t usually try to play into anons addressing each other, but this anon sums up some additional discrepancies. Some are kind of throwaways to me because the contexts are vague, but some are pretty damn important.

Especially JM’s mental health. Miss me with your “I would never tell my partner about how I’m emotionally suffering” bullshit. Even if you or your partner aren’t the talkative type, if JM’s friend can notice it, so can his alleged significant other.

And even if you’re one of those shippers who think that these things don’t matter because in your relationship it’s normal, it is absolutely not normal when those things you don’t know or forget about each other start to add up and the both of you are in your damn 20s. One of you better have early onset dementia, or you just don’t care enough about each other.

Make it make sense.

[plasmamembranes]

Like, I used to have the mentality of "learn as much as I can from as many people as possible, and I can learn something from everyone" along with a general "say yes to everything at least once" mentality but all that got me (beyond a handful of years of adventure without substance) was various drug addictions along with somehow someway coming out of all of it being the Only One in my circle without an addiction to hard drugs like heroin or meth

I used to live for other people in the sense that I was always trying to hang out with someone, spend time outside of my house, I always wanted to be running around doing something and meeting new people.

I do know why this happened like there is a reason but then it flipped and now I honest to godddd would rather pull one of my teeth out than hang out with someone other than my gf

I don't think I'm a mean person, malicious nasty or even rude, I just struggle an insane amount with feeling interested in other people, and on the rare occasion when I am interested it's hard to find the energy to invest. I am very wrapped up in myself snd don't even notice the ppl around me most of the time. I am not rude to people just aloof and a little cold. It is undeniable that other people find me intriguing and want to be around me, but I struggle to feel the same way honestly.

But what I struggle with the absolute most is the fact that I don't truly want this to be any different. Like I struggle with the very fact that I feel this way and am generally happy not having community or friends. Like, I have friends but it's all very surface level, and I actually don't want it to go deeper.

The thing is I don't think this is particularly natural or normal and even though I truly don't feel lonely, I want to understand why I am like this, particularly when it so fully contradicts my beliefs about community being integral to what it means to be human. Why do I believe that and yet I feel fulfilled without it? Why do I struggle so much with being interested in other people when I believe love among humans to be quite literally the meaning of of life?

The thing is my girlfriend is much the same way as me and she actually has a best friend she speaks to daily which is different from my situation where I do still have a best friend technically but am at the point where it's a chore to respond and I struggle pushing through my disinterest. She has the same tendencies as me to feel disinterested in these same people though and to almost devalue their roles in her life although unlike me she does not drown or wallow in guilt and she does not think anything is wrong and she refuses to allow herself to feel obligated because she feels that a sense of obligation for any reason that lies outside of herself (i.e. a duty to community) is the killer of true desire. This is yet another situation in which I wish I could be more like her, I believe I would be happier if I was more like her. And yet I also struggle reconciling this desire with my beliefs once again. I asked her how she manages to be this way without feeling guilty over it or worrying that she may be treating the people around her badly even if they cannot know her inner thoughts or feelings and that she doesnt treat anyone badly. And basically after a conversation was had she told me she is sorry that I base my own value off of other people . But my response to this both internal and external is that, if love and joy among people is something that so fully makes life worthwhile, how can my relationships with others not be important? How can the way I treat them even if it's unseen not be important? How can the way I feel not be important? What if my profound disinterest is hurting people around me?

I would have to destroy and reorder my sense of morality and personal values and beliefs from the ground up in order to reconcile it all

It's possible that among other things the fact that I've been on Tumblr for over half my life at this point has been damaging in many different ways. Which of course is a given and has been for a long time, but now I'm talking about strictly this issue. Even tho I don't really talk to anyone on here, as long as I can use this app, it gives me the illusion of surface level community and perhaps even friendship. Not much, but just enough to keep me going, to satisfy whatever small part of myself wants those things, just enough to feel fully disinterested in pursuing those same things irl

[mysicklove]

hi mello ! i’m feeling a bit bold (as far as bold goes considering i’m asking anonymously) i wanted to ask abt your opinion considering how yk like usually nsfw pages tend to strictly ban minors (rightfully so ofc) but then write content of characters who are minors aged up, and idk why but to me aging up the character never seemed right cuz doing so gives the space for others (like those ppl that would justify sexualizing young characters and then say ‘oh but they’re like this dragon hybrid thing so they’re actually 9000 years old) to use this as an excuse to make said nsfw content,,

but yeah,, no hate ofc !!!! just wanted to explore the reasoning behind aging up characters cuz i don’t fully understand it so i wanna hear someone else’s opinion and you seemed to be the most approachable

no pressure tho, if you don’t wanna answer that’s totally fine you don’t owe it to anyone x

take care !!

-🩰

hm. well, it’s because i literally do not give a fuck LOL

to me, it is drawings. they don’t have feelings, they don’t breathe, they aren’t human. they were made up. so, if they were made up to be a certain age by someone, what is stoping me from changing that age? they aren’t real…so idk man it just doesn’t seem immoral to me.

just like i age down characters for my big brother au, or i wrote a shit ton of characters as literal hybrids. it’s not real, so i can change characters in the way i see fit because i am an author. you are x reader fics, which in no way will ever be real, so i just don’t think that being able to change a characters age will do harm.

so when i see, for example, yuuji itadori, and i think that i am attracted to him, never in my mind does something flash the words “he is a minor” because to me…he isn’t, at least in my fics with him. it’s just the way you interpret it, and that’s what causes the “controversy” on tumblr.

i also see characters in my fics as prototypes? ig u can call it? with the same example, my yuuji x reader fics, he would look like yuuji itadori, act like yuuji itadori, but he isn’t. he isn’t written by gege, he isn’t animated by mappa. he is written by me, which means i have the power over him to do what i seen fit. if that is to write smut/romance, then he will be a adult, because I am an adult and i made this au. although neither of them are not real, they are two separate entities of each other

andddd this is completely different than minors irl. a drawing of something is completely different than a human being that is under the age of 18. tbh if you can’t separate fiction versus reality then…no offense but i do not see whoever you are as an intelligent being LOL. but that sounds mean, i am not bashing anyone who doesn’t agree with aging characters up, but it is the same people who bash on this who read/interact with dark content. like all of the sudden they can seprate fiction and reality when it regards to yandere…..

but like i said in the beginning, i don’t give a fuck what people do with my work.. if you want to interpret a character as a child, that’s disgusting, but it’s not my fault? if your mind is to think of a character as a child when reading smutty things, then you are sick in the head, but it’s not like my readings spurred it on. they will always be like that, regardless of what they are reading.

i write (95% of the time) for myself. i don’t see the character as a child, and honestly that’s all that matters to me at least. i can’t stop the small amount of people from having pedophilic thoughts about my work, but to be honest, i am not going to let that ruin my fun. i think about myself firstly — i am not a good person anon

hope this didn’t come across as rude, and when i say “you” i am not regarding you as yourself, ig i’m talking to people who shit on others who age characters up. not the people who disagree with it, and remain silent (respectful) about it

[ichijokaoru]

I still am liking gotchard and this isn't me wanting to be rude abt it cus 💖 gotchard, I'm just having a little complain about something I genuinely really like (based on My Personal Preferencs), but why did the pacing Suddenly get so nauseating with the last few episodes. ik lots of ppl complained abt it, and maybe it's an especially fast response to fan complaints, but I guess I just personally liked when it was paced slower ;o;

now it feels like suddenly the amount of ground we're covering per ep has increased So Much, like I feel the amount introduced in the past 2 eps would've been introduced over At Least 4, but probably more, with the previous sense of speed

ik this is coming from me, someone who Especially enjoys breathing room with the pacing, like I'm a kuuga fan who wholeheartedly loves the pacing of kuuga, even though I regularly see people say it's too slow. which is a huge disagree from me I genuinely think it works perfectly but I guess it is My Exact Birthday Show (yay mine and kuuga's joint 24th this month) which I joke about being literally made for me for a reason.

but regardless of the fact I'm a known liker of slower pacing, it seems like such a weird change of pace after it was going for like... two episodes per mini plot thread before.. it felt unnatural to me- I feel even if they wanted to speed it up a bit, they could've sped it up without it feeling Soo fast... yes, I have a personal preference and it's okay if they want to speed it up, it doesn't have to cater to my tastes, but I just wish it felt a bit more natural in how it picked up the pace?

alas I will keep watching cus I do still genuinely like this show and the characters, is just hope the pace settles a little bit, or if they keep it up, it feels more natural I guess

[sueske]

Being a sns person who doesn’t like h (bc liking her but hating s is for some reason the thing an annoying amount of sns ppl on twt decide to do. Because they totally are not the same character at the end of the day with almost the exact same flaws, but I digress.) is incredibly exhausting. Some naruto ship poll happened and sh got first place (sns got 4th or 5th place I think) which it was obviously heavily botted and the ppl even admitted to botting the poll but sh peeps were just getting so bold over it.

I was weirded out that sh manged to beat out sns and voiced that but got ‘dog piled’ (for lack of a better word. It was one person + their annoying yes man) by sh shippers saying I’m a salty pinky stan / ss person and when I’m like no lol. I don’t mess with ss in any shape or form and you don’t need to be a s stan in anyway to think sh is an absolutely ridiculous and bland crack pairing (that doesn’t nearly have the same amount of fun in it as other crack pairings imo bc h is just too bland to ever make anything she’s involved with interesting. Even if she’s shipped with most well written character in the series, the ship is still bad bc of her specifically) and then they went on go how “sh is actually more queer coded than sns is!! h and Sasuke are literally like two lesbians!! sh is yuri actually!! Naruto and Sasuke are actually like brothers so you’re shipping !nce$t and you’re a disgusting proshipper who’s a homophobic white fujoshi who fetishizes men.”

Like…. That’s a LOT of anger towards someone you don’t know a single thing about besides the fact I ship Sns and dislike sh…….

Anyways. Just an annoying experience I had that further proved to me that no matter how different s & h stans who ship ‘unconventional’ ships are just as weird as the ones who ship nh and ss.

The only reason twit is cool is bc of fanart, the takes aren’t the best and are pretty basic… it’s filled with toxic and unnecessarily rude ppl and I’m seriously considering just abandoning the app.

sh being queer coded at all is just ridiculous lol they had to have been joking when they called them yuri. sns antis calling people fujoshis that fetishise mlm and incest shippers what else is new… you can’t expect too much from twitter though so.

[jadenightthewriter]

In their defence they may be stupid but marcellus is a) traumatised and b) a child. Idk what marcias excuse is tho 😔 in the esmerelda version she is also so so traumatised and has barely had time to recover from althers death before ending up with a baby for a second time except this time she can't dump it on someone else 😔😔😔 (the bit where she goes to the heaps in that version is So funny,, she shows up like um. Haha hi uhhh help. And she has a teenage boy with her and also a baby (identical to baby #1 silas got handed) and silas is like marcia wtf. Marcia why is there a baby who looks exactly the same as the one u gave me before. Marcia where r these babies coming from)

Honestly I think real au esmerelda probably had it better than canon esmerelda?? Like in canon everyone had caught on that etheldredda was killing her kids and tried to protect her, in this au etheldredda isn't even killing just the princesses she also killed her son who wasn't a threat at all and everyone is so on guard abt it. Esmerelda is never ever left alone w etheldredda not even once and all the palace staff r so careful abt it

YEAH <3333 septimus and marcellus get along So well here,,, septimus is having some kind of panic attack at one point and marcellus is like look i get it- and seps like LITERALLY NO U DON'T. And marcellus goes haha. Lmao. And then there r explanations (once sep is not actively crying on the floor) and septimus latches onto marcellus as his new favourite person (equal to marcia) and also septimus gets twice the amount of hugs and its all very sweet and nice <3 also I'm assigning marcias rooms another bedroom so marcellus can also stay there 😌 they may already have one?? I think it's mentioned in thm somewhere??? But. I'm putting it properly in the story this time <3 marcellus is staying in the tower while all his alchemy stuff is under construction and marcia HATES it bc he can spot when she's not sleeping and literally pick her up and put her into the bed and it's the WORST and sometimes he makes food and then she has to actually stop what she's doing to eat it and it's awful 😔😔 (<-she's doing better physically and mentally than canon marcia tho so). He's also very much a shoulder to cry on abt dn1 related stuff so literally this marcia is like canon marcia but 100% less. Lonely and sad.

Anyway I got off track,, yeah septimus and marcellus bond over being two guys with the same variety of trauma and both marcia and marcellus r able to help him more in this au than in canon bc they have. Experience. Does it help septimus that much?? Short term kind of long term definitely. Marcellus to septimus is like a kind of cool uncle/sort of dad figure,, they hang out when neither of them have smth else to be doing (sometimes when they do) and marcellus teaches him abt alchemy and marcias like wow marcellus :/ I can't believe you'd steal my apprentice :// that's so rude and mean 😔😔 and he's like lmao <3 and keeps teaching septimus stuff. Also marcellus does eventually tell more ppl abt his Actual backstory and jennas like WAIT WE'RE RELATED????? and decides he's cool actually now that she can bully sep abt how that's her great uncle 🥺 how could he steal him from her like this 🥺🥺🥺

This ask is so long abdhdbdjd rip and uhh. Well i have Plans for a fic but I think we all know what happens when I have a plan for a fic (<-it never ever gets written) so PLEASE write smth if u want to i will love it forever and ever and ever <3333

Consider: I would call them stupid even without the trauma, hence they have exactly 0 excuses sorry babies I love you but no

I bet Silas thinks Marcia did something stupid and kidnapped them all which is,,, aha not exactly wrong?? But it's not like she's going to admit that. (side note i feel like marcellus and silas probably get along shockingly well and marcia is Upset about this she's been betrayed how could you marcellus)

hmm.... that's a good point about esmerelda. I think mentally it might be harder for her though, because there might be lots of people who love her but i feel like there wouldn't be many who would try to get super close, because she's still royalty. i think septimus should accidentally trip and fall through one of marcellus's silly experiments and meet esmerelda and maybe be her friend for a bit.

ngl marcia sounds like a cat here i love this. do you think sep and marcellus (help i need to shorten his name i can't keep typing it T^T) scheme to like,, trick her into doing things they want. i bet they do like pspsps marcia look here. (i bet marcia and marcellus fight over how much alchemy and magyk stuff they're allowed to leave lying around. their rooms look pretty much exactly the same because they both hoard so many things except marcia's has like 2% more purple. relatedly i bet their horrible sense of fashion has infected the other.)

marcia and marcellus working together is probably the best possible thing to happen for sep it's like,,, someone understands almost all of what happened to him, there's always someone to talk to, there's someone to be responsible and someone to be irresponsible, he gets all the good things he deserves <3333

i think the jenna sep marcellus dynamic would be so funny idk how much an age difference they have (depending on AU version i would guess 10-15?) but they probably have the same sort of influence from marcia and all love to make fun of each other. they probably wear purple a lot and don't notice until silas points it out lmao and then make a point to see who can wear the most outlandish purple thing until marcia yells at them.

bestie same 😭😭 i can't promise anything (fuck you, school) but i have so many ideas i'm serious when i tell you this au is one of the best things i've learned of in months

[trickinabucket]

I went to the grocery store for once in a long time, specifically to the one I used to work for.

It made me think of the only weird as fuck/rude thing that happened in the like 6 months I worked there

One evening, I was working a shift that would let me out just in time to catch the last bus of the day. I was really antsy about getting out exactly on time, because I had no other way to get home planned and I didnt have money for a cab or lyft.

I was working as a cashier for the last few minutes of my shift, and I cut off my aisle light, indicating the line was closed.

I was beeping up the next person, and upon another glance back, I saw this old white dude got into the line while I was working.

I said, shit, i mustve forgot to put my light on. Halfway up reaching my hand to flick it off, I noticed that it was already off.

“???”

So I called to the back of the line while my hand was going down, “Sir, my light is off…”

And he left, notably in a huff.

Eventually, I got through the line and was wrapping up, while the last person was talking to me and assuring me that, yeah, that was a weird fucking interaction. She was also a manager of another store in the chain.

The guy who left my line ran up to the back of the conveyor belt and slammed an empty cart against it. To clarify, that means that guy was not in a line, so I’m assuming he finished getting his shit checked out and had decided to spend one last second there throwing a destructive tantrum. He walked away after he had done it, both I and the last person having witnessed it. My only reaction at that point was 🤨

Anyway, while packing up, a manager (of this particular store, one of my immediate bosses) came up to me and asked if I denied the last person who came in my line, to which I answered w a bit of sass, “yeah, I sure did.” Because I had assumed she was just asking about it in a conversational way. I figured the guy complained to her, and that she was on the same page as I was.

Come to find out, she thought I was in the wrong. Turns out the guy told her I turned him away while I still had my light on. This was confusing to me, because that clearly didnt happen. Because at that point I didnt consider the guy would lie. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and assumed he didnt see me do it, and was mistaken because he thought he saw me cut off my light as I talked to him (hand half-raised as I talked to him.)

Thankfully, the other manager was around to explain what happened and said I was absolutely in the right and following protocol. The guy was just a dick.

Well, I just thought about that incident again. He wasnt mistaken. He straight up lied.

I had considered the possibility he might have told a soft lie to save face or backpedal. No, he straight up knew what had happened and was putting my paycheck under compromise because he didnt want to walk over to an equally long line in the same location. Because, once again, I was done when he came back around and slammed his cart into my line.

He knew he was in the wrong and went there planning to intentionally tell a lie just so I could get reprimanded by a manager. He had lost like no amount of time between him checking out somewhere else and checking out through my line. He only had to walk a few lines down.

Lmaooo my ass literally sat here giving this guy the benefit of any sort of doubt because like. It never occurs to me that people would lie, especially to that extent. Maybe it’s just the tism?

It also probably had something to do w me being black, as well, all things considered. At the very least, he’d be less inclined to think of me in any way as a human w my own needs and plans and explanations. I was just a black person who had the nerve to tell him no.

Idk. 😂 it was just funny how I typically do some spunchbob ass shit when it comes to ppl being dicks, even when it should be immediately obvious that someone is being an asshole on purpose.

[demonsfate]

anonymous sent . . . holy cow they're not liking your post on the tek subreddit. i find it ironic when they complain about the lore/story and then say "too looooonnng omg who cares!!!!" like bruh... buncha braindeads. maybe they DO deserve all the story mess/harada's useless "facts"

oh my gosshhhh did you find it?? you probs did 'cos it's a recent one & i have the same username as my personal LOL. like... i feel a lil embarrassed 'cos i was probs did "overreact" to the comments. but like... they were just so needlessly rude or straight up vicious. (especially that one calling me autistic, when y'know... i am straight up) i just wanted to fire back. but rly, i feared i did make myself sound too hurt when i shouldn't have.

i just don't get WHY tf i got so much backlash for it? like even in op itself, i stated i don't even hate how jun is portrayed in tek8, i simply think she is different, and therefore i just don't like her as much as i did in previous games. like... it's literally just a character analysis yet everyone acted so frickin mean about it???

and ppl mocking me for pointing out her "smiles" and stuff. but like... how a character expresses themselves tells you a lot about them. my point was that the way jun expressed herself in t8 was totally different than how she expressed herself in previous games. what best way to demonstrate that point than to show how she smiles far more frequently in t8, and how she expresses more emotions?

like character design and how they present themselves IS indeed an important factor of a character portrayal. like if jin started smiling far more, i would say he was different! if we suddenly saw josie being angry and never crying or smiling, i'd say she feels different!

LIKE i said to the kind ppl who disagreed, but POLITELY, i told 'em - i don't mind if they disagree! that's what discussions are for! but why the fuck do ppl gotta be animals about it? why do they gotta act like they were raised in a barn about it? they could've just said "i don't think this" and that's it instead of just insulting me and acting all hurt over a literal frickin opinion on a character...

i'm glad you're supportive of me, though. like these are literally the same ppl who act straight up ableist to me, or just say rude stuff, but then say "WHY IS JIN THE HERO WHEN HE STARTED WAR?! JIN SHOULD NOT BE HERO?!" it's just... i don't get it man, i don't get it at all. especially when, i'm sorry, but i betcha these ppl are def the type would watch youtube analysis. dudes can make hours long youtube vids, but when i'm talking thru text, suddenly i'm autistic or fucked in the head (as far as i know, nobody said i'm "fucked in the head" but i've been called it before for expressing my opinions on the subreddit) and yes I AM, but they're saying it like it's a bad thing and like wtf are wrong with these ppl???

i should be able to express "this character just doesn't feel the same to me and this is why-" without getting harped on?? i understand the internet is full of nasty ppl but GOSH DARN, the amount of hate i got... the fact the post had zero upvotes... just wild, man...

the funny thing is, i'm not even the only one to notice. other people on twitter has pointed this out-

why do these love the way jun looks in this game? because she gives off different VIBES than the jun in t8!

and not to repeat myself but i feel the need now 'cos hoo boy reddit users just ignored everything i said. but i wasn't even HATIN' on t8 jun, i stated she is fine - she just doesn't feel like the old jun to me is all! like my goshhhh.

anyway, i just completely left the tek subreddit after that. and like, i hadn't used reddit in a looong time and i think this is def the final straw. like my first time using it in forever and this is what happens... yeah, that's it lol. and honestly... see what i'm doing right now! i wrote a long reply to you... but that's because i'm passionate. making fun of ppl for writing long posts... it's just, ughh... it's one reason why a lotta ppl are scared to speak up about their passions, it's why a lotta ppl don't wanna infodump!

but you're right. if ppl are gonna act like this, then they do deserve terrible storytelling. "we hate these inconsistencies but also every character is inconsistent so don't complain about it" like what???

[diakamu]

Dragalia Lost’s Main Artist is Promoting NFTs

Saito Naoki the illustrator youtuber is now basically recommending  NFTs to japanese artists (altho he would deny that he is) its so rly surreally bad im embarrassed and saddened to see him using such manipulative logics to justify NFTs and basically hurray to toxic capitalism

In his Youtube video, where he has 750000 followers (note; in Japan, ppl don’t usually subscribe a channel so this is a really impressive number) He did this pseudo “centrist“ “opinion“ rant where he describe “Pros and Cons“ of NFTs. As if.

If you’re interested, It’s the second latest video(as of now) with “600万円($60000)” on the thumbnail. There should be Eng sub.

In the vid, he literally said "NFTs are bad for the environment bc of the huge amount of electricity they use. BUT the smartphone that you use to criticize me uses electricity too! You could've put it down to save the earth lol. but i respect your position. SO you should respect mine!"

by far he's one of the most successful illustrators AND youtubers here AND he uses THAT super manipulative logic How ignorant. There tons of young artists, young like aged 11-19, those artists are watching his fucked up excuse as a rigid one. They are easily manipulated and they go like   "I like his art so his opinions must be rigid!" and then "EVEN IF YOU DISAGREE WITH HIM, BE RESPECTFUL AND DONT EVER EVER EVER JUDGE HIM. YOU ARE SO RUDE" ofc, ppl never hear ME instead because he is Saito Naoki and I'm not

NFT is already bad enough but him using such manipulative explanation to basically look down on anti-NFT ppl even before they appear by saying "I respect your opinion. Even tho you're not respecting mine Smiling face" that neo-liberal toxic-individual-accountablism? is beyond evil. States the "downsides" of NFTs and immediately represents the anti-NFT ppl as "rude angry mobs attacking him JUST BECAUSE they 'DISAGREE'" Almost feels like it's an NFT cult recruit video to be honest.

He was rly manipulative when he selectively avoided to mention anything about the ownership of each art, Like ppl never value the art itself over the popularity of the valid name tag of the artist who drew and posted it originally. and he said “Even I, Saito Naoki did it! so can you!” Like, no shit. You did it because you’re Saito Naoki, the famous Dragali, and Pokemon artist.

When he said “I shall be the successful example, so that fellow artists won’t give up in making money in this low paying environment” He could’ve literally call out the toxicity and begin some campaign for the real change so EVERY artist can make a decent amount of money. Instead he used that “positive role model” excuse to justify joining NFTs.

He is a  disgusting devil.

I loved his artwork btw

And probably will.

But please do note these;

1. Being critical and demanding a real conversation isn’t mean or rude.

2. Artists aren’t good people just because their artworks are good. Their art don’t necessarily represent their opinion, or their rightness. Their words do.

Sorry for my messy english but thank you for reading this far.

[jennifersminds]

People hate on Elena for what Damon does and not redeeming him, but it’s not someone else’s job to redeem somebody, and also, Elena cannot leave Damon. When Katherine!Elena broke up with Damon, telling him that she doesn’t want to be worried about him killing someone every time they have a fight, Damon responded by killing her friend, and then nearly getting Jeremy killed, knowing that Elena would never recover from Jeremy’s death. Elena now has proof that if she ever leaves Damon, people she loves will be in danger, so she cannot ever leave now. Damon specifically went after Elena’s loved ones to hurt her, so Elena can never and will never leave him, not when it might lead to her standing over her brother’s grave again.

okay but this,

there’s definitely a huge problem not just with elena’s character but with all of tvd (and like the world but that’s another thing) of like- women being held accountable not just for things they do but for things the men around them do. It’s a huge thing with the klaroline fandom and forwood too tbh.

It’s obviously a lot more present in Elena’s character and character arch bc she was essentially made the primary support system for the Salvatore brothers. (fully intentionally at least on Stefan’s part might i add). Elena is held responsible both in the show and fandom for stefan’s blood addiction, with her spending all of season three performing insane emotional labour and literally feeding him from her own vein in season 2 (I really don’t think we talk about the symbolism of that plotline enough btw).

She’s also made directly and p much solely responsible for ALL of Damon’s actions. The amount of times he responds to her being rude, or disregarding or even just slightly emotional with devastating and horrifying acts is insane.

Small list

- killing Jeramy bc Elena turned him down

- raping Andy for months!!! (literally the most horrifying subplot in all of tvd btw) bc Elena doesn’t love him (she might not know ab this but this but there’s so many scenes of him just like… talking to andy ab Elena, there’s literally a scene right before he drinks from her where she’s compelled and is like “why are you doing this?” and he says “i’m in love with a women i can never have.” like it’s some great tragedy that justifies what he’s doing.)

-breaking Alarics neck bc Elena got mad at him for attacking Caroline’s father

-sleeping with a women who tried to kill elena less than 24 hours ago bc she was mean to him (also can we talk ab how the show/fandom paints that as Elena being self absorbed and selfish? i cannot think of a more reasonable reason to get upset than a friend sleeping with someone that is actively trying to kill you like??? anyway stan beklena)

- killing a women on the side of the road bc he’s sad a teenager doesn’t love him (another scene that ppl ‘uwu poor damon🥺🥺’ too all the time which is odd to me)

- and ofc the season 5 drama

what’s insane ab that last one, and i’ve mentioned this before, is that katherine isn’t mean when she breaks up with damon. She doesn’t even make up a reason she whole ass says ‘i’m afraid you’re going to kill ppl i love- i cannot trust you- peace out’ and then he KILLS PPL SHE LOVES LIKE. you could even argue ELENA has been crueler to damon in the past like kats so chill.

this definitely does come down to that whole ‘women are not rehabilitation centres’ thing but the fandom dialogue is so twisted and women hating it’s v hard to imagine it’ll ever be fully undone. hopefully we have a moment like ppl redescovering ezria on pll but tvd really put their whole pussy into this shit so idk.

[jooniely]

svsss thoughts lol

i posted this on twitter but wanted to post it here too cuz ppl here love to discuss and will actually read this maybe and i would love to discuss things cuz that way i get to see things in a new light

so here it goes, my messy thoughts months after finishing svsss main story but not the extras:

thought about how shen jiu and bingge are parallels of each other and illustrate how cycles of abuse work, and how both suffered and made others suffer, and ultimately lost everything they ever wanted and worked for in their lives and now im sad

i dont think theres a lot of fics that explore how similar their characters are. its also odd to me that there are fics that paint bingge as being okay while sj is irredeemable and scum. i had a lot of issues and was upset about the potentials of svsss that were not met

thankfully i was not the only one & i was able to find very few fics that delved into things svsss ignored. i appreciate how mxtx writes her stories as realistically as possible cuz she loves to write about how ppl judge without knowing everything. its a common theme in her works

it works well in tgcf and mdzs but to me it ends up being frustrating in svsss. it works well in tgcf cuz we still see the whole picture so we dont miss anything, its the same with mdzs but with some restrictions ex/ mxy and how we only know him thru rumours

and given the false rumours that we saw with wwx we can guess how false the rumours about mxy were as well. someone also wrote about this lack of closure or knowledge for both the characters and readers and how it works well with the themes of the novel but i cant find it lol

that being said, this style, although perfect for her other 2 novels, it falls short imo with svsss. now im admitting that i have yet to read the extras so maybe these things were answered there but there are major characters that we just dont get much about

my complaint here is 100% not critical lol, its personal, i wanted more info more screen time for characters like shen jiu given how important he is but we never got that. our narrator is so unreliable we cant trust him on anything (imo that takes away from the reading pleasure)

sy 100% believes everything from PIDW when it comes to lbh and sj and with lbh it causes so many issues that could have been avoided, this is not a complaint, this is part of the story and theme. but it leaves me frustrated especially since with the other 2 stories the reader gets to get out of the narrator's head or can see to an extent the flawed judgemental way of thinking and how it was wrong. with svsss we dont really get that? maybe cuz i never realized our narrator is extremely unreliable, idk. tbh idek how to explain

idk how to explain properly cuz my thoughts about it are messy. like random thought i re-remembered: the lack of reaction to sj just up and disappearing. sy never realizing the ppl around him are ppl and not just fictional characters. sy not caring about the person who's life he had to live. from the lack of background on sy himself we as a fandom assumed he had absent parents and died alone and thats why he never cared about his old life, no mourning or grief. he easily gets accustomed to life without almost everything old teens/young adults live with. no reaction to the amount of violence and death around him. its one thing to read about but another to live thru. from our assumed old life about him, he should have been very sheltered

the more i think about it the more i see things that frustrate me cuz the potential was so high &honestly if mxtx took a crack at it now with her improved skills, it would reach the popularity levels of her other novels. but oh well i guess thats why we have fanfic lol

there are other things that i just didnt like at all, like that assault scene or how it ended with them apparently just leaving everything behind? and how i can literally list the red flags in their relationship (and i have listed them in a previous svsss rants/thoughts post on here when i hadnt yet finished the novel) but i attribute this to just idk, i like to ignore it, its not great

this is all over the place but if you read this, then i welcome any response just be nice pls lol, i had to block some ppl from my last post cuz they were being mean and rude and honestly that just makes me upset and less likely to enjoy the content you may be rudely defending. despite my criticisms of svsss i still love reading fanfics about it cuz i see the potential and see some writers who are angels and write some amazing svsss fics that fulfill the potential.

[yuurivoice]

Dude why are you so rude to your own fandom.. like i get sometimes people ask questions that are obvious but diff ppl got diff levels of understanding and/or don't trust their own understanding so they come to you for confirmation! There's no ill intent there, just people trying to enjoy your content.

I've answered this thoroughly and thoughtfully before and don't really have anything additional to add other than...I haven't even roasted anyone lately? Like I'm just vibing. Maybe I'm a little cheeky and sarcastic? But like...if you've scrolled so hard you found me being dismissive, you likely also saw my last response to an ask like this.

Ultimately? I'm allowed to get annoyed, but am responsible for not being a dickhole about it, and I'm working on doing less of it, even though I do feel that it's utterly silly to think that if you go to the creator of any media and ask them the ABC's of their work a dozen times over, they're not allowed to voice frustration. Some people just want clarity and that's fair. (Again, covered all of this in a different ask, not gonna blurt it all again) But some folks miss or disregard stuff, or ask things fishing for clues, hints, or spoilers and THAT is what bugs me. And trust me, there's a difference and it is literally a thing that I've dealt with for years, in my ask box and in livestreams and so on.

I'm also convinced some of y'all just assume the tone I take via text is much harsher than what I actually intend, and that's not a me problem.

People who straight up ask questions for clarity, barring a "is the sky gray" level whiff, can get straightforward answers.

You're speaking really bold about how I treat my fandom when I think what you mean is Tumblr anons. There's a Discord server for patrons who I've had lengthy conversations with, clarified all sorts of things, discussed theories and thoughts and details.

Anyone who has ever approached me with a question for realsies, be it personally, in comments, or on the server...they get a real answer, whether it's simple or something I feel is obvious.

What you see get answered here is a slim fraction of what ends up in my inbox, and that's a fraction of what actual interactions I have with my fandom.

So...there ya go. I am unabashedly me. Not perfect. Definitely got a limited amount of patience. Try to be firm but fair as needed. That's been the case for 5 years, and I'm still a work in progress.