#and thatll be awesome i think
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im back home from visiting my boyfriend nobody but him talk to me for a while ok ?
#wind howls#i cant even pretend that im not sad#my older sister was on call with my mom and i passed by and she asked me if im sad and i almost broke down again#i managed not to cry on the plane but i did cry before boarding and when i got home and before actually leaving my boyfriend#the ball in my throat just wont go away#its gonna be a couple days of being really sad but. a couple of friends sent me really kind words. and i have friends at school this time#so im not totally alone.#and ill get to see my boyfriend and all my homies again in like 4 months. thats not too bad right#4 months is not a lot. its a third of a year#until then ill be missing my boyfriend like hell. but thats normal i think bc see you laters suck so hard#but they make the hello agains feel all that more happy#and one day there wont be another see you later. one day there wont be goodbyes#and thatll be awesome i think
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I haven't finished the quests from 2.4 just yet, but I have already so many thoughts that I can just barely keep contained especially about Huaiyan, Yunli, Yingxing and just sm too much in fact, I'm dying rn
#expect some rants#in particular an exploration of the actual state of Huaiyan and Yingxing's dynamic#bc a lot of people i see in general are perceiving it as purely amazing and awesome and perfectly happy#and i simply disagree and i want to explore how i think the state of their dynamic was#additionally ive seen people comparing how both yunli and yingxing are very bold confident individuals#and i essentially want to go in depth about how while they both have that characteristic it is still very very different#a very different kind of confidence between them#and lastly just how i imagine a yunli and blade encounter might go#bc the yingxing she envisions is an ideal version that her grandpa has told her thats part of why she still thinks of him by the name her#grandpa told her over what he himself has chosen to go by now#so i wonder how her expectations might be shattered upon meeting him#Ahhhh#i love this update so far#might also talk about how much i really like yunli and yanqing dynamic and how fun it is that shes pulling this side we havent seen from him#but thatll all be once im fully and finally done#so o7#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr blade#yingxing#huaiyan#yunli
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me when i want to accept writing commissions vs the depression thats been eating me inside and out
#i like#offered comms once#but now i have venmo and i know how to use it#but like#if i opened them back up i just#i dont know if id even have the motivation to write anyway#not to just traumadump in the tags lol but everythings felt so difficult lately#i feel so empty and not real#every day i struggle with the intense urge to just delete everything ive ever written#every account i own#and just disappear forever#and like. im not good at making connections with people?#so even though ive spiraled into another pit of isolation ive had one person check on me and it was my bf who i talk to every day anyway#and honestly i think the reason im typing this here even though its very tmi is because like#i just need to get stuff out? because maybe getting stuff out will like#help#but i dont know if it will#i started going back to therapy but i dont even know if thatll help#writing is hard#getting up in the morning is hard#breathing is hard#everything just feels so hard and i feel like i have no energy to do anything ever#and its felt like that for months and months but its getting worse as time goes on#anyway uh#im trying not to take my hiatus until february#but i havent been able to write anything in like two weeks#so maybe i wont be able to keep to my super awesome posting schedule and will instead go back to posting things sporadically as i finishthe#which wasnt often nor paced#and typically the thing that keeps me writing is praise (which is unhealthy ik) but uh. ive not been getting a lot of that so its just like#i dont know. sorry
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[ID: 2 digital drawings of Qiu Lin from Our Life: Now & Forever. The drawings have Qiu sitting down, cross legged and putting both their hands on their cheeks. The design used was a Step 2 design with the longer hair version. They are looking to the left and pouting. They are wearing some orange lipstick.
The image on the left has Qiu in a blue, frilly dress. The top part of the dress is a dark blue with the skirt part progressively becoming a lighter blue per skirt layer. The background goes from a dark blue to a lighter blue.
The image on the right has Qiu in a yellow, orange and red, frilly dress. The top part of the dress is a pale yellow with the skirt part progressively going from a pale orange to a reddish orange per skirt layer. The background goes from a pale yellow to a brighter yellow.
Both drawings have the genderfluid flag surrounding Qiu.]
#olnf#our life now and forever#qiu lin#qiu#my art#digital art#art#fanart#(it took me a hot second to figure out how the dresses worked but i think it looks cute!!)#(also long hair qiu is amazing and while short hair qiu is very gender envy too i just find long hair qiu more my style)#(i imagine qius waiting for either mc and tamarack or just mc)#(i had a lot of fun colouring the dress and drawing the blush!!)#(i wanna draw a sleepover seen one day)#(not sure which step prolly 1 or 3)#(maybe 3)#(friendship is awesome and i think itll be fun to draw all of em together)#(no clue when thatll be tho but oh well)#(i had a couple of issues with the hands)#(but i think they look... good enough?)
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think ive finally figured out a building process i dont despise. still got a LONGGG way to go improvement wise (a whole lifetime even) but the process occurs regardless :3
#danny phantom#fentonworks#background art#lineless art#drawing process#my art#fan art#ignore the lack of sign btw i forgor :skull:#VERY messy in places but! im reaching a point where i can bust out something like this kinda quickly :)#which is good because i really dont have the focus for cool week-long pieces most of the time#so if i can get fast enough at making shit that looks ok? thatd b so awesome.#btw expect some ops center concepts soon because im not happy w how restrained i made it#like it looks fine. but i want it to look like the abomination cobbled together over the last 20 years it is#like i wanna feel the same emotion looking at this thing that i feel looking at the pathologic polyhedron#i think thatll both be cooler and more accurate to the show fentonwork's vibe#i also wanna explore the modern industrial thing i had in mind w that giant window#think i could do better w a few more iterations. i like it as a starting point though!#anyways my wifi is really slow so im just gonna ramble while the video uploads ok? :3#So! im starting to write out some worldbuilding for my rewrite#basing shit off of ohio mostly because i live here#but also personally i hc amity park being around where/in the place of cincinnati#tho i have way more experience in the northern part of the state#because lake eries a daytrip whereas a wisconsin trip needed a sleep break#like i doubt theres an Official Location in a meta sense due to all the inconsistencies#like id genuinly b suprised if they even had like “midwest” written down#but its more fun to work w a solid base so :p!!!#ANYWAYS rewrite ideas#1) major change. im fusing amity w elmerton#because im a hater but also because i like the idea of east/west clevland applied to amity so im doing that.#although cincinnati is north/south...
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every day i am so glad g3 came out btw. there was such a stretch of time where i thought that monster high as a franchise was dead, which was so weird when it was such a game changer to the doll scene when it came out! there was no news and there was barely anything to speculate over, and like a miracle that changed and there was stuff to look forward to :] also its been honestly pretty great imo, i really love g3. i just love that this franchise is continuing and that its so good at the same time!
#my post#i know its been back for a few years now but gosh#i adored it as a kid. i never got into g2 though.... i still dont want to *shudders*#i know its not exactly the end of the world if the franchise *did* come to an end but itd still be sad imo#it at least deserves to go out on a bang if it ever did#ive been saying it a lot but g3 is also... kinda my favorite gen? which is i think not a popular opinion ajfjshd#i try not to let nostalgia run my opinions of things. g1 was iconic and amazing and thatll never change. but g3 is also great and awesome!!#sigh i still never got to hang up my dolls </3 the room im in now is full of decorations that arent mine but i cant exactly move them around#or maybe i can idk i never asked but its whatever#monster high
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uh oh guys! ive started yawning
#9am 💀💀💀💀 i caint go to bed or ill have to literally die. this is my life now...#i need 2 at least last until like 3pm. ok? lifegoal#thatll be 24 hours. so it makes it ok if i fall asleep then EVEN THO thatll fucking suck#bc i wouldnt get to spend anytime with my beautiful wife... sad sad#but see my problem is. i cant just keep lying in bed bc stright up? ill fall asleep#but i cant like. go downstairs. bc last time i fell asleep On the couch#and it was so unfairly comfy on that damn thing What was that. best sleep ive ever had since like. we llst those couch cushions. sry for#only sleeping well on couches I guess.#but ya. i cant go downstairs bc i cant stand for long periods of time so id sit on the couch and pass out and thatd be evil of me#bc i have roommates u see. so itd be weird to Be asleep in a shared area....#last time i walked in circles in the garage which ill admit was awesome. loved that#but also i think it tiredme out and led to my couch sleeping pr disaster#i think ill just stay in bed but try rly rly rly rly rly hard 2 be nor/mal. and ill watch movies
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man
#im so glad piercings exist yayyayy#not only do I feel awesome myself whenever i realize....#but seeing other people with tham also just brings a smile yippeestyle on my faceee#yes this is bc i saw a singular awesome person with a lipring for maybe 2 seconds in passing =w=bbbb#and also bc sometimes blguys have stretched ears and i can point and go -> JUST LIKE MEEEEE YAYYYAYYYAYYAYAYYYYY#and its awesome evry single timeeee#sillyposting#da best is when i see someone with the stretched ear + ballsegment ring OOHOHHHHH#ball closure ring WHATEVERS. THATS MY SHITTTT#that was my goal!! my reason for starting!! and im doing it RIGHT NOW. im so glad people are coolll......#ohhhhhhhh if i see cool people i need to remember that people also see me that wayyy :3#last time i ran the cinema there was a ~16y/o girlly with her gramma that complimented my snakebites!! i totally didnt expect it it was so!!#yay =w=bbb#anyway im feeling good rn yayy#my exam went pretty well!! now lets hope that itll be the same for the other two (it wont be) =3= erm#anywayyy im thinking about the holes so let me say: IF i do pass all the exams this semester ill get my eyebrows weve been known thiss#BUTT. im thinking my next motivation will be a second pair of snakebitss....#back when i was still looking at the video app there was such a cool person i often saw that had themmm#and..... ohhhhhh theyre so cool....... waugh#=w=bbb#ughhh waittt i also need to get more ink grumpgrumpp...... hmm thatll wait i thinkss#okk
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i love my job so much.//.
#uploads#fashion#work finds#this thing is so cool. i picked it up and was like the arts so awesome i wonder what furfright 2010 is#literally was like do u think its furry shit?#and my manager was like idk lemme google it and YUP#so dope and its distressed so nicely like someone really wore the shit out of it#got this and two other really cool shirts today. have so much stuff in my holds to buy i just need to not spend so much money#but i needed this one#: )#anyway have my first buying shift in so long tomorrow im so excited : ) going to a different rag this time i think so thatll b cool#have to get up at like 7am tho wish me luck
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Like everything is pissing me off rn
#it’s like my body recognized the unspeakable amt of random sadness didn’t fix anything so now she has to make me hate literally everything#the just like backseat background constant dysphoria over not having any e in my body is like. sickening it makes me feel awful#and I’m starting to really properly run up against the cost of hrt for the first time which is SUPER awesome too#and ofc there’s stress over this STUPID!! FUCKING!! ACTING PROJECT!!!!!#and that makes me want to kill someone#but there’s also stress about like everything else. and world situation isn’t doing anything#and also everyone around me makes me angry#and also everyone makes me angry.#like if anyone’s reading this genuinely go fuck urself u have no ability to help me and you’re really!! really stupid for thinking you have#ANY#idea what it feels like for me rn. and let’s be real you don’t have a solution either so what’s the point#i really really reeeaaaaalllyyyyyyyyy just want to rip someone’s throat out if I can be real#god i need to get any kind of sleep at all#EVERYTHING SUCKS. GENUINELY EVERYTHING SUCKS. ITS BAD!!!! ITS BAD!!!!!!!!!#i like actually want to cry#& every time i start thinking abt it contextually like actually I don’t have it so bad and all of these feelings are transient or whatever#i want to rip someone’s throat out even more#& ofc that anger also turns inwards but for the most part I can just call that as stupid and move on#but like: why the fuck am i treating a Tumblr blog where none of the readers actually care abt me as if it were a fucking confessional#i don’t even want to think abt sleeping bc i know thatll suck too I’ll have some horrible stress dream#god I’m gonna start crying again actually yall i fucking hate emotions can I be real
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soo sick to my stomach thinking abt what a fail today was... i cant believe i left work crying again like it literally makes me want to rip my hair out. oh! there that bitch go again!
#txt#my boss promised my job was secure n that shes gonna keep me forever so at least thats not so much of a concern#but my coworkers seeing it go down ? me just disappearing suddenly n every1 else being like lol where did she go.#thatll get a man to take a running leap off a cliff i tell ya that much#UGHn the fact my boss (no. 2) asked me to pick up a dinner shift too n i was like absolutely! happy to help! (n very happy for the overtime#n he was like youre awesome thanks which had me lowkey cheesing coz unfortunately i crave male validation#n then this ????#oh my god this morning i was even like 'u ready to take on the day?? me too!' n then he runs to the bank n comes back n im sobbing. wtf#sooo embarrassing i wanna die... i feel 16 again#omfg AND my mom was even asking me this morning who out of my coworkers i think is the most emotional. i said oh so and so.#god LAUGHED in my face for that fr#made an absolute spectacle out of me. im SIIICKK
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siffrinnnn for my modern au :3 i dont think i ever posted these and they were in my drafts so!
reblogs are very appreciated!! :D more info under cut ↓↓
ok so this au is called the wax sculptures au. i was calling it the theater ghost au before i came up with that so u might know it by that name instead.
the whole thing of it is. i wanted to make a new chatfic. i do this i make overly complex aus for the sake of a chatfic and its awesome.
i havent shared much info abt it? ive been purposefully vague bc i think thatll make the fic more fun. but the basics r that everyone lives in a college city, mira and isa and nille all go to said college, and siffrin is bonnies babysitter. siffrin meets everyone else via that connection.
siffrin also "haunts" the college theater. which is to say, people see his pale formless ass briefly in the dark and are like Ah. There Is A Ghost In The Theater! the theater director hates this :3
its called wax sculptures bc the full name, following the format of all my chatfic titles, is "[main groupchat name]; or, There Are Wax Sculptures In The Basement". its a reference to the phantom of the opera, because there is a ghost in the theater. self explanatory.
loop is here too ✨ yay
#venus.art#venus.aus#wax sculptures au#venus.isat#isat#in stars and time#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#siffrin isat#i was gonna write image descriptions but. mm. i dont have the energy for that rn#nd id say more on the details but theres a lot that im planning on like. drip feeding to the reader#bc i think its VERY fun to gradually reveal information like that in a chatfic format.#cuz like. its almost always casually done. even if its a Big Important piece of information about a characters life
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Hihi! I was just reading ur akaashi story and it's rly so so good 😥 like i'm completely in love with it blushing giggling rolling around in bed at 1am and all that.
Everything was so great the writing the characterization and the plot and also ur overall style 😍 i luv it so much ahhh. I literally live for ur writing (the suna one's also awesome).
So I just wanted to beg u to update it pls pls pls but don't overwork and remember to take some rest but i just rly want to see the update 😭👍 i don't want to stress u out but.
Thx for reading & have a great day!! Congrats to writing THE BEST akaashi story on the entire site 😋
xoxo, 😼
AHHHH so glad you liked it!!!!!!!!!!!! im actually so deeply in love with akaashi and his character and his brain in this story mm his brain and the way he thinks is so YUMMY and i would LOOOOOOOVE to talk more about him and his dynamic with yn because it took me quite a long time to figure them out
im so happy you like the suna one too!! ill post the next chapter of that in a few min (theres 5 total in that, and i have a completed tsukki fic too thats 3 chapters, so thatll go up next)
i'm writing genius as we speak!!! again it's suuuuuuuuuper long, it's the longest singular chapter ive ever written in ALL my years of writing. it's 15k rn and ive only written 2 scenes and have 5 more to go, so im def chugging away at it. hopefully i get it done byyyy saturday? sunday? tmrs a long day for me but hopefully thurs and fri ill have lots of time!
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Sooooo, Oiraon's hmmm, theyre a pretty cool fantasy/made up species of evolved/mutant bird (Almost a gryphon/dragon but not quite!) that i am so totally not obsessed with uhuh yep!
Im not gonna info dump about them since thatll take forever but you can find out more about them here at the Oiraon Website
So, i think i have an obsession with tmnt? mmmh? yeahhhh, combine that with my love of birds and art and uh oh what did i accidentally create jdfhdjfhdjfhs
I wasnt originally gonna turn the gang into Oiraon's, but i was messing around with ideas and stuff when i realized my rottmnt obsession definitely influenced the design i was making (im not talking about this one, but another design i cant share quite just yet :P) when i realized that, heeeyyy i essentially accidentally just turned *insert name here* into an Oiraon xD
SO... after realizing how cool and fun of an idea it would be to turn Raph, Donnie, Leo and Mikey into an Oiraon i couldnt stop myself <3
Here we have: Mikey as an Oiraon!
Essentially, i challenged myself to get the "vibe" of whoever i was turning into an Oiraon come across in the design! Without yk, using their original names n stuff while adding my own personal flair.
I felt like an absolute genius borrowing the shell patterns and using those on his wings/neck i am 100% biased imo it looks AWESOME. This one is by far my second favourite (Leo's Oiraon is my fav, cant reveal him yet but youll agree with me when i do >:))
Theyre all getting different names that have a loose definition or meaning (because its FUN!! and feels weird if i keep the og name) SOOO, the name "Anatolius" is Greek for "sunrise" and "from the east". I feel like that fits them really nicely, PLUS its got so much nickname potential!!! My best friend nicknamed them Ant and i cant stop chuckling each time i remember xD
In Oiraon society theres lots of professions many can fill in and for this guy, OBVIOUSLY, i decided to make him an artisan because DUH!? Ofc he would be!!! And as a sign of being an artisan, they need a poncho <3
(fyi idk how to design apparel) i guesstimated whatever looked nice and ended up with this design that i kinda wish was real because id love to wear smth like it myself.
This is 1/4 of em, currently as of right now ive finished 3/4 and im only struggling on designing Raph's Oiraon interpretation (red is so hard for me to incorporate into a design??? wheeze)
#the tmnt as oiraons#oiraon#gryphon#dragon#reference#cimmerian#my art#tmnt#rottmnt#i turned michelangelo into a gryphon/oiraon (no regrets he looks FANTASTIC!?)#yk that feeling when u make smth so cool that you can keep looking at it and not hate ur own art afterwards? im feeling that rn#digital art
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Heyy
I remember you were you saying that you dislike tlb fanon bc it was ooc... so what do you imagine the boys would be like, then?
Why do you like the greasers? Is it solely because of canon or do personal headcanons make them appeal to you?
I think I like Zoe because she's aggressive and assertive. I've always admired girls who stand up for themselves, especially if it's in a cunty, firey way. Fearless, I guess. Brave. But yeah, I see what you mean about Jimmy and Zoe's romance being rushed.
Love the little devil horns for Jimmy...I would honestly wear them year round if I could get away with it.
Do you play Jimmy as more 'nice' in the game? Or do you make him a ruthless asshole? I was... mostly nice. Ocassionally, I would antagonize the nerds or the jocks, if they pissed me off. I also weirdly loved driving the lawn mower from the mini game. I even saw a lawnmower you could drive irl and I was tempted to steal it. Weird times.
Do you have a favourite Gorillaz character? Or are you solely into the music? I like Murdoc because he's a fruity satanist. He's undeniably a piece if shit, but idk... I relate to the misfit aspect of his character. And what songs do you like by the band? Off the top of my head, it would be rhinestone eyes, on Melancholy Hill.
I also wanted to wish you a Happy New Year. I hope you have an awesome night and all the best for the upcoming year.
for the lost boys mm all the stuff that i have seen has been x reader stuff and its been uh not great... from what ive seen people tend to make them like instantly fall in love with the reader because she is just SO different from everyone else on the boardwalk or she's just unafraid of them or some other dumb reason and like that doesnt make sense at all?? like did we all watch the same movie they kill people they killed that boardwalk security officer and he sure as hell wasnt afraid of them. i guess in my mind theyre a lot more gay (seriously why is the reader always a female did we watch the same movie they wanted michael BAD) a lot more violent, and a lot more bitchy because they arent nice people in the slightest and i think its a little ridiculous how fanon makes it seem like they are OR they would be just for y/n because people lets be real. michael emerson was the y/n and they were pretty bitchy to him
to be honest i like the greasers the most because of their outfits and i think their theme is the best (though all the clique themes are so good) i dont really interact in fandom spaces much besides fanart or fanfiction so i dont really have any headcanons for them. i did hear one of them say "stay gold ponyboy" as i was running through the autoshop once which i liked bc surprise!!! im also a big outsiders fan
i can see why people are fans of zoe bur for me she was introduced too late for those parts of her personality to really show yk? her character as a whole felt like a big afterthought to me especially in the cut scenes with jimmy
oh i was a cunt with jimmy. i beat up like everybody every chance i got LMAOO around like 50% of my gameplay was just me beating up people who didn't deserve it. i would be fighting with the adult townies, jocks, greasers, prefects, basically EVERYONE. most of the time they had it coming though. they kept insulting the fit! they had to be beaten up. i do remember one time i made jimmy stay up all night fighting people at the carnival and when he woke up HE HAD NO CLOTHES??? WHO ROBBED HIS ASS?? WHO WAS SO DESPERATE THEY NEEDED A FIFTEEN YEAR OLDS SHIRT, SHOES, PANTS, DEVIL HORNS, AND THE LITTLE BRACELETS??? LIKE ??
my fav character would probably be russell but tbh after around the song machine? i think ? i stopped listening to their new albums. cracker island just sounds so bad and dont even get me started on that GOD AWFUL album art. i have so many gorillaz songs i like its hard to choose.. i got introduced to them by rhinestone eyes so thatll always hold a special place in my heart and plastic beach as a whole is my favorite album. i think maybe 5/4 or sleeping powder might be my favorites but its hard to choose
thank you!!! happy new years to you too!! i hope you have a good year aswell!! im actually going to be able to go to the outsiders museum from like january 8th to the following monday idk the exact date so im starting my year off right :p
#the lost boys#the lost boys 1987#tlb#michael emerson is literally y/n#rockstar bully#bully cce#bully canis canem edit#bully se#jimmy hopkins#gorillaz#russel gorillaz#the outsiders museum
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hiii umm... im trying to think of everything thatll potentially be on here butttt bc i dont want tunglr to kill me im doing funny tags ^_^ so blacklist these if you dont wanna see em. from most to least embarrassing
pee... pee stufff... specifically omorashi. tag will be #puppypads
plushie tag is #hotfuzz
transformation will be tagged #dogweed
blood (maybe light drawn gore also but nothing crazy im squeamish) will be tagged #ultrakillreference
hypnosis will be tagged #spirals (not very funny but yk. reasonable i think)
pup play will be tagged #gettheball
general nudity will be tagged #goodgrief
my awesome system. use it as you will. im sure ill need to add to these. im also gonna post... assorted other things that may not tag. objectum type stuff. wires and shit
anyway yaaay welcome to my sex world
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