#and that's rad as hell

[minart-was-taken]

Hey guys I figured out how my school bullies knew I was weird

[birb--birb]

Saw someone making a bird wren pin and it caught my eye bc Wren was capitalized on the captions. And it just made me go like...hey, thats me, that's my name.

Every now and then I get these moments of not-quite gender euphoria but something close to it. A deep satisfaction and comfort knowing that I'm me, that I found me, that I'm so very different than I was 10 years ago, and at the same time so much happier.

It just made me think of 17 year old me, sitting on tumblr longing for something to change, to finally leave my hometown and do what I want for the first time without fear of being wrong. That kid had no idea where they'd end up, no idea how to connect with themselves, no idea who they were. It's kinda sad, but not in a "You're still young you have your whole life to figure shit out", more in a "I was too afraid to even perceive myself let alone to even think about wanting things". I didn't let myself want things for a long time and that makes me hurt for little me.

I guess I'm just reflecting on what we talked about in therapy today too.. that someone I looked up to and genuinely cared about doesn't know me anymore, and it's weird. It's weird that I've changed so much and I'm so fucking happy I've changed so much. I finally feel like a full fledged person with wants and emotions and needs and it's so fucking sad that it took me till 28 and years of therapy to get to here, but I'm so fucking proud of myself. I was part of my best friends wedding party with a whole new name and gender and all sorts of wonderful fucked up brain chemicals and a person I called my best friend 6 years ago is now standing in front of me and doesn't know this version of me. It felt like they were from a past life, and that's because they were! It just reminded me that there's a past version of me that people still think of, that some people only knew the 1.0 or 1.52 version of me, but now I'm out here with all new updates and bug fixes and some people never read the patch notes. Others have only ever known me as this 3.682.31 version and all others in between and that's weird but so freaking cool also!

I'm losing my train of thought but just damn 17 year old me would never fucking expect to be where we are today. And I wish I could tell them so many things, not even about gender like yall will figure that out on your own, but I wish I could tell them that shit gets hard and we come out the other end so much better and brighter and different than I ever would have imagined. I wish I could tell them that people care about them, that their needs are important, and that they aren't a burden on anyone in anyway whatsoever. I wish I could tell them that the system is fucked and just do things however they want to, that it's so much fun to embrace the weird and you'll find your people there. I wish I could tell them that bad things are going to happen and you can just say no, you can hit da bricks, leave bc you don't owe anyone anything. A n y t h i n g. I know there was no way out for me other than getting into uni, and there was no way I could avoid rowing, and frankly I wouldn't want to lose the connections I've made through that. I just wish they knew they didn't have to suffer through so much shit, that their worth is not based on what they're capable of doing or providing for someone else.

I think that's it, I think I wish I could tell 17 year old me that just even existing in the world is fucking rad and that's more than enough. You dont owe anyone anything, people love you for you even if you don't know who you are yet. And it's gonna be okay.

And you get some dope ass scars and tattoos and get so much better at video games letsgoooooooo

[showyoumyfavoriteobsession]

TJ MIKELOGAN’S HALLOWEEN 2024 EVENT

Day 8: Costumes and makeup

Hellraiser (1987, dir. Clive Barker)

↪trivia

[psalacanthea]

'why does everyone play a tiefling?'

because having horns and a tail is rad as hell. next question.

[circuscountdowns]

begging you for child bishops 😭 i want to see baby narinder in your style. OR BABY LAMB. any augghhgghgg foams at the mouth also hi rlly love ur art frfr greatest cotl artist Ever

nothing bad ever happens to any of them ever

[jaradraws]

zac oyama you've done it again (making a character that's irresistible to me)

[pigswithwings]

everythings better with women i love u women. thank u for the great service u do for the world just by existing

[hiael]

MC: I always wondered what hell would be like, i always imagined fire, explosions, screams of torture and stuff like that

Diavolo: oh....

MC: But now that i'm attending the RAD i realized that my mentality was very innocent compared to that of demons

MC: Maybe the real eternal torture is having to go to school for the rest of your life with homework every day, classmates, teachers who want you to fail, no vacation, no graduation, no future guarantee, no dreams, no hope, no nothing

MC: This, this is demonic

Diavolo:.....

[zeribip]

Really a fan of Jason having a scar from his autopsy

You can support me on ko-fi !

[sinusoidaldysfunction]

Io. Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss.

[i-eat-deodorant]

About the recent art of lamb pulling on narinder’s tongue: why did I see Lamb’s cloak as legs (like a lamb-spider abomination) and why did I not even question it

((To be clear I loved the art but I haven’t actually played the game myself so I just assumed that was some endgame abomination lamb turns into))

The fleece is just a plain old woven thing, but that doesn't mean they're incapable of it.

[mikasasrippedtoenail]

Why is the moral dichotomy always placed upon women? Why is it only women that have to be pious and self righteous? Why are women supposed to be kind and nurturing while men are supposed to be intelligent and daring? Why can't women be mischievous and loud? Why can't women be human?

[ricky-mortis]

Happy Birthday, @curtmega!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

some hasty Laughingstock ft. butterfly!Howdy for your mild enjoyment...

[terrainofheartfelt]

Made in Japan is really fucking good. And I think she deserves to be on this list. But if it is, then Machine Head doesn't need to be. yk?

Deep Purple fucks severely. I concede that. But i think this book could have chosen either the studio or the live recording of what are essentially the same songs.

[morgenstern16]

It’s so funny that Kal’sit’s fighting style is just this