#and that history fact always gets me
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what is your favorite thing about charles and your favorite thing about erik? separately, as in what you like most about their characters :]
a devious question this one is, my friend!!! it's hard enough for me to explain my thoughts cohesively, but having to pick ONE thing i particularly love is difficult. with characters like charles and erik, theres been so much done with their characters over the decades and so they have so many components to them that make them so interesting and fun to observe. BUT I TRY FOR YOU TODAY. under the cut i kinda ramble and the size of this text box makin me anxious
i think if i were to be simple and broad, what i enjoy most about charles is his determination to help others, even if he isn't really thanked and/or if people don't even like him. ofc, this isn't to say he hasn't done wrong- to be honest, the fact he does wrong/questionable things at times is another aspect of him i really enjoy, maybe because- broadly speaking- he's meant to be altruistic (intent vs outcome and all that). i don't know if that's super exciting to most people, but it is for me
as for erik, my reason for liking him is easier to explain tbh. To Be Simple And Broad, his progression from villain to antihero over the decades has been fun to observe (as much as i have so far anyhow) and analyze. i think to be a bit more specific, him using his rage and pain as justifications for his villainous actions is definitely what compels me the most: hurt people hurt and the sort, an idea i've always found interesting (something something vicious cycles and the like). yet now, he recognizes this wasn't really. A Just Thing To Do and is beginning to change that, which i enjoy
#snap chats#may you forgive me anon i always feel awkward explaining things AVELKJEAKLJ#i feel esp awkward cause i haven't read toooo much of the comics yet- like ive read. an ok amount so far krakoa wise#can you guys tell im fighting god himself to Not write a fuckin. NOVEL#im so sorry i have an over-explaining problem my mom was mean to me growing up but anyways#i definitely want to read more and more outside krakoa. the more i read the more im fascinated by these two and their history#but to continue my prattling. as if the three paragraphs above arent enough This Is Not A Thesis RELAX#i think a. 'poignant' moment i think adds to what i like about charles too is that soliloquy where he recognizes people dont like him#yet he could always be worse- like if he's bad now to others imagine if he really just said Fuck It All#it's simple but so am i whaddyagonnadoboutit. i mean that point itself could be discussed but i'm trying to keep this brief bear with me#i so bad want to know what issue that's from tho all i know is that it's from krakoa but i neeeed the whole context#i think like. an additional bullet point to charles i also like is his loneliness#and i say this cause- I Say From My Amateur-Psychology Armchair- it's a component of why he's so earnest to help#but im keeping this point in the tags until i can confidently verify that with myself after some more reading#Unfortunately a favorite pass time of mine is psychoanalyzing characters like why else you think i major in psychology smh#im going to force myself to cap the post here because i ended up typing like 20 more tags just rambling#and as i said id like to keep this simple and clean !!!!! i have sat here for like four hours answering this ngl#ignore the fact half that time was spent getting distracted by solitaire and riffling cards ok I Am Very Easily Distracted#but fr when it comes to charles and erik- charles esp imo#i feel like i need to write a whole paper just so i can mention the nuances of the characters and like. EVERYTHING#because again six decades is A Lot of time for writing decisions to be made and for their characters to change over time#im a glazer but i wanna be a nuanced glazer yk. is that glazing at that point-- w/e anyway#its a lot. so today you will have to tolerate a very Blah answer from me which i must apologize for#down the line once ive read a comfortable amount more varying from multiple eras maybe ill revisit this question more in depth#as of right now tho .... chat i wanna get legion of x so bad i skimmed it and hhhhhhhhim gonna throw UP#i need to shake charles like a ragdoll BUT ANYWAY. bye bye for now lovelies !!!!!!!#please forgive me if i didnt answer your question efficiently ..#here i am saying i wanted to keep the tag count brief and yet !!! jesus christ. shut up My God I REACHED THE TAG LIMIT
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I've mentioned a little bit about writing on here, but it occurs to me that I haven't actually shared any of my writing yet. (Which is odd, because I don't consider myself an artist and I've already posted two little doodles.)
So I've been working a little lately on a period radiostatic fic (1930s-1950s). I'm thinking I might start posting it on Ao3, but I would love to gauge interest a little bit beforehand. All fic info + brief excerpt below cut. Would love to get some preemptive feedback and make edits before I go posting anything :)
No title yet; though I was inspired by the song Friendly Neighborhood Poltergeist by Rory Webley
Potential CW/TWs for the first arc: Alcohol, PTSD (Military flashbacks; WWII specific), Nazis, Period-typical racism, Period-typical homophobia, light violence/descriptions of death and gore. I don't write smut so there would likely be implied sex but no details. General TW for Valentino but he will be OOC from hellaverse (i.e. not abusive and rapey); Period-typical American patriotism; Police being Police (ACAB)
WIP Tags/Characters/Ships, etc.: RadioStatic; Chaggie; HuskerDust; Minor StaticMoth; Lucifer, Vox, Alastor, Charlie, Vaggie, Husk, Angel Dust, OCs used as plot devices/background characters (no major role in the story), Niffty, Rosie, Mimzy (Mentioned as of right now, not sure if she will be important yet), Valentino, Velvette.
Obsessive Alastor; Obsessive Vox; Demiromantic Asexual Alastor; Bisexual Vox; Protective Alastor; Human AU (kinda); Alastor Can't Control his Shadow; Alastor and his Shadow are different entities (but are still the same person); Possession.
(Can't think of any others right now)
Brief summary for what I'm going for: Vincent Olcott (Vox, though I likely won't be calling him that in this fic) gets home from the European front and wants nothing more than a shower and to curl up in bed with his beautiful wife, but he's rebuffed at the door and forced out on the street. Grappling with his demons, Vincent tries to move on and ends up with a job at the local paper. Just when his life is looking up, he's transferred to a neighboring state and forced to rebuild his life all over again. He catches his big break with a story on a serial killer, exposing police incompetence and helping to catch the person on the loose. But he quickly becomes more trouble than he's worth, and he's forced out of the paper. Vincent bounces around the midwest for a bit, chasing cold cases and selling his stories to the highest bidder, until he ends up in New Orleans with his biggest mystery yet.
Alastor Wiles is shot and ripped apart by dogs while disposing a body one evening in the muggy Louisiana summer. He doesn't expect to wake up, as one usually doesn't wake up from a bullet to the head. But awaken he does, with a new body and a whole host of powers to boot. It isn't long before the old house he's tethered to– his old house– is sold, and his first ever roommate is surprisingly easy to possess. With free rein of New Orleans once more, Alastor and his roommate team up to lure all manner of bad men to the cottage at the edge of the woods. Because who, really, would miss them if they were to disappear off the face of the earth? Tenants come and go. Some stay for longer than others, some end up buried in shallow graves just behind the treeline. It seems that even in undeath, a higher power is allowing Alastor to continue his righteous mission to eradicate the scoundrels and scum of the earth, and who is he to look a gift horse in the mouth? But his newest tenant is sticking his nose where it doesn't belong and threatening to unravel the tenuous house of cards that Alastor has only just erected.
Excerpt:
1945 - May
The war was over– well, the war in Europe was over. Vincent breathed a silent thanks to whatever higher power may be listening that he had been stationed in France for the past year and not the Pacific front. He’d heard horror stories through the grapevine about the kinds of things that were happening to the men over there, and he really didn’t want to find out if they were exaggerated.
He had been all smiles coming home, picking up a bouquet from the florist almost as soon as he’d gotten off the train, and walking with the faintest skip in his step through the streets of Chicago. He could have hopped on a streetcar, but his house was only twenty minutes from the station and he was relishing in the smell of clean air and smiling faces in every window, American flags billowing in the wind.
An involuntary shudder wracked his frame as his gaze slid over a dilapidated row of brownstone townhomes. Shadows flitted across the darkened glass, ghosts of people he’d never known, voices he’d never heard crying out in pain. A sharp grin, a red armband, the glint of cold steel and the flash of gunpowder. The countless lives of the innocent occupied just as much space in his mind as his fallen comrades.
Vincent hadn’t realized he’d been staring at the cold and empty window until he was jostled forward by a passerby with a grumble. He didn’t realize he’d been crying until the tears dribbled off his chin and splattered against his navy blue suit. Shaking away the ghosts of his past, he set back down the sidewalk. The skip in his step was gone, his smile was fading. The stems of the rose bouquet in his hand had broken under his grip, but it didn’t matter. Eileen would want to cut them to fit her favorite vase anyway.
Inspo playlist [Spotify]
(its set to private since this is just for writing inspo. let me know if the link doesn't work)
#hazbin hotel#radiostatic#staticradio#hazbin alastor#hazbin vox#fanfiction#ao3#fanfic#my writing#looking for feedback#hazbin au#hazbin human au#voxal#wwii au#if you are familiar with the time period and want to help me fact check please dm me#I am a history buff and I have a degree in journalism#so I'm familiar with a good deal of what I'm writing#but I am always interested in getting more eyes on my work to make sure I dont put my foot in my mouth#proverbially#hazbin fanfic
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another day of going on twitter to see 20 year old loser goths say that "conservatives in the scene go against the inherent value of the subculture!" when faced with a shithead and you scroll down and they also paint metalheads as the neo-nazis crossing over into those spaces who don't care about the music just the aesthetics. this is why I hate you.
#makes it impossible to have an argument to bc yeah metal IS full of racists and it makes me sick but you are literally whitewashing your own#history and making a convenient scapegoat so you never have to reconcile with the fact that while punk and radical politics do intersect#they arent inherently connected bc bigots have ALWAYS been a part of your scene too! you just never have to think about it#goth isnt even good enough to get on this kind of high horse honestly. listen to something better and leave me out!#my posts
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keep hearing the same shit “you’re ignoring history” “Jews are native to Israel” we sure are. but so were the Palestinians. They are also a Semitic people. no native people should be the sole controller of a piece of land that others are also native to. they taught you to share in kindergarten didn’t they. “Palestine didn’t exist back then that name was given to it by the philistines” a piece of land can be called different things over history. we don’t call Iran Persia or Istanbul Constantinople anymore do we. Israel, Palestine, whatever. the point is that we all lived there and maybe we shouldn’t kill our neighbors and take their houses because we think we’re the only ones who deserve them
#actual sugar post#I’m gonna get fucking skewered for saying this aren’t I#it’s just. I know the history they taught me it in my old pro Israel Jewish school!!#feel free to fact check me or clarify anything I might’ve gotten wrong#but like. Even then if you were there before and you come back and someone else is there#it’s still like. wrong to drive them out and never let them return#and no matter who was there first or what anyone did or who is in power bombing hospitals is always wrong#no matter what#idk#rambles#blabbering#free Palestine
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kinda wish Henric's design was Rollo Flamme's instead bcs im kinda iffy that he's the only character in TWST rn that's not drawn "conventionally pretty" and he's the most evil villain?? I feel like its too stereotypical (i get it theyre playing the evil big guy with anger issues trope but they could honestly do better KDJKSKS)
Speaking of Sleeping Beauty references, I kinda interpret that Henric was a reference to King Hubert (Prince Philip's father) bcs theyre similar in personality, but even he was a good guy in the movie???
Like Stefan, Hubert is also prone to being stubborn, argumentative, and having anger outbursts at times, as shown when he becomes angry at Stefan because of a perceived slight against his son
(I know TWST doesnt copy paste lore from Disney Movies but why is the big guy on the Maleficent series the only one whos comically evil in TWST while everyone else gets a reason why they acted bad in Book 7 Jdkakfkskd)
Also I mentioned Rollo bcs atleast in this way, it could finally match his hatred for faes lol like in the original GloMas story, I feel like this part about Rollo was just too random, like I get that he's delusional but ATLEAST make his delusion realistically believable KDJAKDKS like I get it... Faes are magic and he hates magic, but I just dont buy the lore progression of Rollo hated the loss of his brother and passed that hatred to random faes that PROBABLY didnt go outside of their nation and probably gatekept info about themselves until Malleus' admittance to NRC, like... wheres the connection... the gymnastics just to make this guy viable to be Malleus hater KDJSKD plus if Rollo was Henric in the story, it would fit well with the way Silver Owls liked him and followed his orders (and he'll lowkey kinda slap as the lead villain in Lilias dream if he got his magic too) JUSTTTT IM SORRY this frollo guy needs to go to war instead, not NBC LDJSKD
#highkey Henrics writing kinda feels fatphobic too but whatever KDJWKKD#someone give me malleus already im oveththinking about Book 7 as always 😭😭🔥🔥🔥#this is just a personal vent pls dont take it srsly#id be pissed if Rollo was the one who killed meleanor too lol#everytime twst does smth super cliche in story i start tweaking istgg JDJAKJD#this post may or may not be stemmed from the fact that i wouldve loved Rollos punishment to be equivalent of Henric's#=aka they got killed by their own greed and selfishness KDJAKKS#im sorry malleus but you were not hitting with the mental punishment of guilt for rollo lol#AND DONT GET ME STARTED at how im angry they wrote that#PROFESSOR TREIN agreed with that punishment too#THE HISTORY TEACHER WHO PROBABLY IS THE MOST KNOWLEGABLE ABOUT HISTORICAL WARS AND PUNISHMENTS??#the most STRICT professor in NRC??? the most TRADITIONAL professor in NRC????#BLATANT MISCHARACTERIZARION IN CANON STORY 💥💥💥💥#in my more genius mind Rollo was rightfully received expulsion from NBC💥💥
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yes it's just me whining about the same thing for the billionth time, pls just scroll past nothing new to see here 👋
#i just want to enjoy the summer but i feel like i don't deserve to if i'm not constantly trying to become employed again 😭#''apply for jobs then? problem solved'' uh-huh yes but!! i also hate applying for jobs#job seeking can be so incredibly humiliating#first i have to send them a letter BEGGING to be invited to an interview#and then i have to try and convince them that i am actually competent and good at my job even though you have my cv right there#and then afterwards they call me to tell me they found someone who they liked better than me#(or rather someone who was more competent than me judging by their work history etc.)#it's like ''yes we are hiring but not YOU specifically lol''#like. at school if you take a test you get the grade you deserve based on how you did in the exam.#it's something you can actually directly affect yourself#but if someone who's applying for the same job with me has more work experience or whatever they will get hired over me no matter what i do#(at least that's how it usually works on my field)#in which case it doesn't matter if i do well in the interview or nah. bc the other person was always going to be picked for the job anyway#and yes one could say i can then be satisfied if i did my best but it's little consolation when i'm still unemployed!!#and so every time i apply for a job and get rejected it feels like a personal failure#and to avoid that feeling of failure i want to avoid applying for jobs altogether#so yeah. being active in job seeking is more likely to relieve me from this misery but job seeking is ALSO misery. so 🤷♀️#that on top of the fact i don't even _want_ to apply for all the open positions on my field#but i feel obliged to because it's what i have a degree on. and when i'm unemployed i don't have the luxury to choose which ones i apply fo#i can't afford to be picky#I DON'T DREAM OF LABOUR I JUST NEED MONEY TO LIVE BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO DO JUST ANY JOB! I AM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR THAT!#i don't want to come home crying from work every day because i hate every single aspect of my life INCLUDING my job 😭#when this semester i actually HAD a job i didn't mind waking up to every morning 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#it's not fair it's not fair it's not fair#to conclude i don't deserve to enjoy myself in the summer because i'm not doing enough to fix my unemployement situation#(just like i don't deserve to feel sad about being lonely because i don't work hard enough to maintain deep friendships#but that's a crisis for another day! stay tuned ✌️)
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post-forced-extension of that assignment i was losing my mind about tuesday/wednesday i experienced a very familiar "ah.... it's as if the deadline no longer exists....." feeling that has now been replaced with "wait i still can't find the resources i need. and i don't know how to organize this. and i don't know what im presenting on (<- super broad topic and i can't fucking find the information i actually need bc our university doesn't?? give us jstor subscriptions or whatever anymore??? so it's all scholarly stuff i can't read or ppl's blogs which im not fucking using for this and half of them just copy entire paragraphs from encyclopedia britannica. who is saving my ass but whatever)" mixed with "I'll figure it out later 🙂↕️" IM PRESENTING IT IN 11 HOURS 💀💀💀
#im having a really hard time focusing too. which always happens bc when AM i focusing anymore but like#still. would love to do anything but stare blankly at my screen humming will wood songs for like an hour. if anyone can make that happen#can someone just fucking tell me what the effects of ireland's political Situation in the 20th century meant for its literature#im begging you just tell me because im finding nothing. i have read so much General History but i can't find lit analysis thats not paywalld#and thats what the presentation's supposed to be on. not a bio of wb yeats which is all im getting somehow#why is this so hard why couldnt i have just presented on the byronic hero or something. fuckkkk#at least i have rascal lying behind me in the chair. we are ass to ass sorta in solidarity (he doesnt care)#he has been oddly cuddly the past couple of days which is nice. have i mentioned that? whatever#but like i havent even edited the ppt since wednesday morning. ive jist been doing more research i have to write a script and do visuals#and it has to be under 15 mins even though im talking about ireland starting before the famine AND the literature from that whole period#if i can fucking FIND ANYTHING ON IT GRRRRR and also can someone just tell me when the celtic tiger happened#idk why but im struggling to find super basic facts and i feel like im losing my MIND. why is this so shitty#it's not supposed to be this hard why is everything. soooooo hard for me all the time orz orz orz
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I'm definitely not the only queer person who's kinda wary of Christian ppl they encounter online right?
Like I see a profile that clearly states they're Christian and they post like Bible verses and shit and I'm just. Hoping they're not queerphobic. Or saying some dumbass shit like "hate the sin love the sinner" or whatever while pretending that's not queerphobic
If they're interacting with me first it's pretty safe to assume they're not gonna be like that bc I'm very obviously queer (🏳️🌈 + pronouns in bio) but if it's someone who hasn't interacted with me at all I kind of instinctively avoid interacting with them out of fear of them being that way. Y'know
#ramblings#i think it's bc even tho i've never been religious and my family isn't like a super uptight christian family#i have encountered a preacher who was homophobic and transphobic before#he's puerto rican too which just makes me disappointed in my people tbh#i grew up surrounded by a lot of accepting ppl both within and outside of the family#as well as a couple gay/trans ppl#i was always taught that that's just the way some ppl are and that we should respect that#even if we didn't fully understand everything and weren't up to date with the latest most accepted terminology and stuff#ppl were just respectful and let others be themselves#so it's extremely hard for me to understand why other ppl would be queerphobic#i mean. i kinda get it. it what they were taught growing up. just how i was taught to be accepting and respectful#but why ppl would continue to teach that to their kids and perpetuate queerphobia is really what i don't get#like. accepting that ppl different from you exist and that's ok isn't going to kill you#maybe learn abt the world from other sources besides the bible and try to see different perspectives#instead of shutting yourself off to just one way of thinking and hurting ppl in the process#anyways. i think it's also bc i've seen too many really religious ppl on the internet who are also queerphobic#and they have these big platforms of ppl who support them and share their views#and like. i shouldn't generalize. but they paint an ugly image of christians in general#also like. christians throughout history don't have the cleanest track record#but i know a lot of christians nowadays aren't like that. in fact i'm willing to say most aren't#but still it's like. better be safe than sorry y'know#idk man
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I've given up on cringe and decided to talk endlessly about whatever the fuck I want at all hours of the day
#wacky watermelons#i just watched the great mouse detective#at 1:04:00 of 1:14:00 I texted the discord something like. surely we can still get a reichenbach out of this (< did not believe this)#and then immediately derailed myself when i saw the clockwork scene???? fuck me man#the animation history nerd that has lain dormant for all these years fully pogged. like real pog champ face. the full passion orange guava#the first major* use of cgi in a disney film?? the combination of a cgi background with hand drawn characters???#also the scene itself is fucking dr doom type haunting. you always forget how much music is in film until they cut it#and its almost exclusively just the distant clicking and clanging of the clockwork#wild. wild. wild#they did in fact reichenbach his ass btw. unfortunately I was cheering while a small mouse child was crying. sorry maam#also the * is about black cauldron being the actual first use of cgi in a disney film#it just seems to be disneys et game so to speak (in that it nearly killed them and then was (more metaphorically..) buried)#anyway this is basically what i do all day. if you come to me at any point in the day i can probably give you a free 200 word rant#about nothing important really.#literally dope as hell though the animation history nerd has beat out the sherlock holmes enjoyer and now im basking in cool animation shit#i really do like how the 2d animation/3d cgi feels similar to the 2d animation/live action of things like who framed roger rabbit#the mixed media is always so so cool to me
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ur teen fandoms will always find a way to haunt you throughout the rest of adulthood i swear. every time i log into steam i get reminded that my original username on that site was a variation on "emrys and his king"
#though honestly. if i had to pick Any of my 14 year old fever dreams to haunt me forever#bbc merlin is not a bad one. not bad at all#one of the few shows i liked as a teen that still holds up as good in my eyes lmao#just got access to my 'reading history' through my library app#and I've had the same card since i was like. 5. so it's got records all the way back to 2016 when they started that#and i just got whacked with a wet trout over the fact that i actually chose to check out sherlock from the library. god lmao#that was always the one part of superwholock i could never get into like i WATCHED it but it had ZERO impact on me
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Anne de Pisseleu had exercised a form of power that was intrinsically extra-institutional and dependent entirely of the king’s favor; her role was clearly understood by political insiders. Criticism took the form of conventional hostility to the role of women in power, yet in the king’s lifetime had to be circumspect and oblique. However, she lived more than half her life after the death of the king whose love had given her power and wealth. In this, she weathered the storm of disgrace remarkably effectively, carved for herself a new role and ended her life a moderately wealthy woman whose assets became a matter for ferocious competition among her relatives.
— David Potter, "The Life and After-Life of a Royal Mistress: Anne de Pisseleu, Duchess of Étampes"
#historicwomendaily#Context: She lived for over 70 years and was a royal mistress for only 20 of them (till Francis's death)#anne de pisseleu#french history#16th century#my post#Francis I#queue#I hate how Anne is dismissed and deemed irrelevant after Francis I's death#Most historians merely claim that she was exiled; fell into disgrace and humiliation; and died in obscurity#Kathleen Wellman even goes to say that Anne was shut up by her husband in a gloomy castle for the rest of her life#(And there's always a distasteful tone of wry satisfaction as they say this - as if she was finally 'getting what she 'deserved')#Suffice to say: this idea is objectively incorrect and I hate it#yes Anne DOES seem to have had an incredibly harrowing and horrible experience for a few years after; that should never be overlooked#But as this article says: Anne managed to weather her 'fall' and carve a new role for herself extraordinarily well#It's one of the most interesting things about her life to me#She still had wealth and property which she rigorously administered and expanded; she headed family affairs and arranged marriages;#She and her terrible husband appear to have informally separated (with a formal separation of property) and in his own last will he#flat-out wrote that Anne 'would never take her place as my wife'. She outlived him by around 15 years and 100% got the last laugh.#She also openly embraced Protestantism in the height of the Wars of Religion which was such a major bad bitch move#guaranteeing her both personal protection and material gratification#In fact one of the last known references of her was in 1576 where she hosted a meeting of Protestant leaders in her castle of Challuau#As you can see: Anne transitioned public royal influence to private personal power#But she clearly remained at the heart of politics and war throughout it all and was always relevant
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being both a sparrow apologist and a normal enthusiast is so difficult sometimes I am sitting here imagining them bonding and crying over canon and so few people truly understand me
#kasey rambles#dndads#no you guys dont understand. sparrow is a good parent! to me!!!#which is highly ironic because i was FURIOUS at him on my first listen#BUT. theres a post that puts this into words somewhere. about how judging sparrow for saying something#when he was in a state of complete vulnerability#FEELS like thoughtshaming a bit. because like#i think sparrow has this mentality of. i dont have to be proud of someone to love them. and i will love them so hard in spite#because he gets too in his head and he worries and he doesnt want normal to be like him#and he feels like this about henry and lark too- hes not proud of them. in fact theyve both actively mistreated him. but he loves them#and that's enough#its like. we're not sitting here bashing on grant for the REALLY shitty way he inflicts his own self loathing onto link#because we know grant only says this when hes vaguely sauced#but sparrow gets SO much heat for saying hes not proud of normal when he was both drunk AND sauced simultaneously#and maybe like. if there were signs that sparrows let this mentality ruin their relationship in the past?#but theres not. the reason it hurts normal so much is because it was UNEXPECTED.#it made him doubt his own memories and his history but. as far as we know. its only doubts. sparrow loves normal so much#and sparrows always been the first one sitting there apologizing (which is another story: we love seeing him continue the oak cycle)#and loving. and accepting normals anger.#god this was such a rant im sorry for anyone actually reading my tags shdjfkdkkfvk#i just have such strong feelings about how like. in comparison? sparrow is NOT as bad of a parent as yall think he is#and i think the only reason we think otherwise is because we only see him through normal#if we got his own pov? youd forgive him just like we forgive henry#also i would kill for sparrow choosing normal over lark i feel like thats a decision hes gonna have to make pretty soon
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was looking up the only ash wednesday song ive ever loved (offering of ashes. btw. or just ashes. tom conry 1978 i know nothing else about this man except that he wrote this song) (for fic purposes) and stumbled upon a forum full of catholics discussing the revised version that was included in the 2021 hymnal and boyyyyyyyy the trads HATE this song. it was a 70s piece and a bit hippydippy in the sense that, for a catholic song, it is low on guilt and strong on self-forgiveness, and the first guy in the thread just has to point out that the unrevised version was too pelagian to be properly catholic
#pelagianism is one of my favorite heresies and i dont even know how this song could be that#next commenter 'i wouldnt use either in church if you put a gun to my head' third commenter 'i love it when heresy is removed from hymnals'#so far im feeling great about what i want this song to DO in the fic. like i knew i liked her for a reason#she's actively contrary to the spirit of lenten guilt! she's doing her own thing! and she's doing it hauntingly#lots of the commenters dislike the fact that the song contains the refrain 'an offering of ashes' because the ashes of ash wednesday#are not an offering they're *an outward sign of penance*#which even as a child i thought was sort of self-aggrandizing. like ohhhhhhhh we get it you went to church and we all see it#it always made me feel like a guilt trip if i washed mine off#i love when religious folks get SO up in arms about theology of lyrics in songs. girl i think he was just trying to make it rhyme#do you not have bigger things to worry about. religiously?#theology is like grammar. to me. it's fascinating to learn about its history and usage but some people treat it like the laws of physics
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(fascinated by countryhumans, in like a bug under microscope way)
#isn't it interesting??#the nuclear family-ifcation of the complicated history between the us france britain australia and new zealand#dont get me wrong some stuff can be enjoyable and i think it can actually be pretty good for explaining historical events in an engaging wa#but the fact that the us is always a cocky self assured dude and france is often the mom friend is fascinating in many ways#(i like to research symbolism and smash it all into one design for my part) (i find national symbols v interesting)#still cant get over france and britain being shipped together#its even more interesting seeing how they handle timelines. fascinating
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i’m so used to the way polish reportage is written i honestly to god can’t deal with reading any that’s not in polish originally
#📓#which is obv a huge shame but also i don’t think it’s as popular of a genre abroad tbh#even considering the fact the word isn’t used that often#i always see americans use fiction/nonfiction as their main categories for book but that barely tells you anything#and non fiction doesn’t cut it either bc a biography a history book a reportage and a piece of theory are all widely different#sorry i’m thinking abt how much i hated reading eichmann in jerusalem again#which. it may also be bc arendt is hard to get through in general for me
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I have so many posts in drafts about Palestine and I still just don't even know what to say or where to start
#how do i talk about my extremely zionist early education#how do i talk about my birthright trip at age 13 and the impact it had on me as a jew and as a human on this planet#how do i talk about my childhood rabbi reaching out the kids i grew up with offering support for those mourning the loss of history#and also those mourning the lives of colonizers (who ultimately are jews seeking a safe space after hardship at the great expense of others#my fucking guts have been clenched for days i feel like a shell#my mom is more worried about sending my transfem sister to college on her own in the inner city now not bc she's trans but bc she's jewish.#not to mention i always say im 'raised jewish' not actually jewish bc im not! im not jewish ive bever had a conversion.#what fucking right do i have#all i know is my upbringing and my ability as an adult to unpack it.#and how many things that i was taught are WRONG#i didnt get a christian brainwashing a got a zionist brainwashing#anyways all this to say theres always a lot of regard for Palestinian suffering on here as there should be in these situations#but young jews have a fucking weight on them right now like you just would not believe#not that its equal to or greater than the trauma of being palestinian. but just that its not mentioned right now#thats all ive got to say. idk yall are welcome to ask me more about this i just had to spew some of it#might delete#cam talks#if it isnt clear im fully pro palestine and my goal isnt to be any sort of devils advocate here. im just in a very complicated sort of pain#if i posted that email from my middle school rabbi here he would be doxxed and hate crimed.#and you know. i dont like the guy. but the fact that i know thats what would happen tells you a lot.
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