#and that fuck-ass cat look so UNSETTLING

[effei-s]

the amount of freak-to-freak communication these two would have... even chrollo would go 'can you not???????????'.

(and when i say freak, i mean FREAK FREAK, like 'arguing about can you even call a chopped-off dick a dildo' type of freak; disgusting mfs.)

feitan: *ignores neon just because* neon: *shows up in a full-on cosplay*

everyone: THE FUCK ARE YOU WEARING?????????? phinks: someone shoot that fuck-ass cat right the fuck now! neon: it's my costume for halloween. *it's literally february outside* feitan: ??? okay i'll bite. neon: and my job here is done. @anotherworldash just look at them, lol. god i really need to write a fic.

this is neon and feitan for me:

[obsessedasusual]

History Repeats - Happy Lowman

Summary: xReader - The club going into lockdown shouldn't be of concern to you anymore, you got out. Happy thinks otherwise.

Warnings: Swearing, guns, mentions of anxiety

Note: 2k - return of the Happy!!! The way I've had this half written in my docs for over a year...... I'm beyond excited to finally get it out!

You had locked the door last night.

You had.

Surely you had locked it. You always locked it.

So the only reasonable explanation to the creaking floorboards down your hallway at 6am was… a cat? Yeah, a cat.

A very heavy cat that took large footsteps towards your room.

You gripped the bedsheets tighter as you pulled them further over your face, hoping they would act as some sort of a shield when the large cat, presumably walking on two legs, inevitably barged into your room. 

Another shaky breath escaped your body as you listened to the footsteps draw nearer.

Calling the cops was a bit difficult when your phone was charging over the room on your dresser. And it’s not like you had a weapon handy. God you could hear his voice clear as day in your head, knowing exactly what he’d say if he were here. Harping on about how you should at least have a knife stashed somewhere in your bedroom and a gun in every other room of the house.

You stayed frozen in place, eyes squeezing shut as the door handle turned, and the door was thrown open without an ounce of care.

“Get the fuck up.” a gruff voice spoke from the doorway.

What the?

You tugged the covers down to your chin and peered across the room in disbelief, “What the fuck, Happy?!”

He gave a single nod before speaking again, “Up. Now.”

Mouth hung open, you could do nothing but stare up at your ex.

“No? No- what the hell are you doing here, Happy? In my house at six in the fucking morning!” Pushing yourself to sit up in bed you continued to stare at the man you hadn’t spoken to in months, “Seriously, Happy. Start speaking. How the hell did you get in here anyway? If you broke a fucking window I swear to-”

“You need to hide your spare key better. Now get up.”

A silence fell between you for a second.

“My spare ke- hey!” your train of thought was interrupted by the tall biker walking forward and ripping the duvet away from your body. In your surprise you didn’t miss the way his eyes quickly flew down your pyjama-clad body before looking toward the still-closed curtains.

“Get your ass out of bed.”

This time you listened and climbed out of bed, stomping toward your dresser to find a change of clothes, “Seriously, Happy,” you huffed as you changed shirts, “You can’t- you can’t barge into my house like this. I thought you were a burglar or something. Do you realise how unsettling that is for a single woman?”

“Good thing I’m not a fucking burglar then.”

You tugged on a pair of jeans and rolled your eyes before turning to face him, “Why are you here, Happy? Seriously?”

He met your gaze only briefly before turning back to the windows and peeping out the curtain, “I need you to pack a bag. Change of clothes. Book probably too.”

Eyebrows pulling together in confusion you stared at the back of his head, “A book? Happy. What’s going on?”

“Club’s on lockdown.”

Your confusion only grew, “A lockdown? Jesus, Happy,” you dragged your hands over your face. “What does that have to do with me? Why do I have to get dragged away too.”

He turned and met your eyes properly then, “You know why.”

Breaking his stare you faced the carpet, “Happy… this is… fucking dumb. What the fuck happened? We have been done since months ago. I’m in no danger. In fact - I’m probably in more danger with you here.”

“I’m not arguing with you. Pack a bag. We’re going.”

This wasn’t supposed to be how your Saturday went. You had left these sorts of Saturdays in the past. The uncertainty, the danger, all of it had been left the day you left the man currently standing in your bedroom seven months ago.

With only a defeated sigh in response you shrugged, counting your losses and turned back to your drawers, pulling out a couple of changes of clothes and stuffing them into a nearby backpack.

When you turned back toward Happy you found him already staring your way. Quickly breaking eye contact you dramatically gestured out the bedroom door, “After you.”

He stared for a moment longer before moving out the door, you following diligently.

“Okay,” you started as you reached the front door, “I’ll meet you there.”

The speed at which Happy spun around to face you would almost be comical if it wasn’t for the death glare that graced his face, “Like hell. You’re coming with me.”

You threw your hands up in frustration, “Happy, c’mon! You’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re coming with me.”

Taking a deep breath to stop whatever snarky remark that was about to escape your lips you nodded, “Fine. Whatever. Can I at least have breakfast before we go?”

“There’s food at the club. Let’s go.” WIthout another word he was out the door and striding toward his bike, leaving you to lock the door and tuck your key - both keys - away in the backpack. Following after the biker you grabbed the helmet from his outstretched hand and tugged it on.

You jumped in fright when the Harley roared to life, catching the way Happy’s shoulders jostled as he chuckled.

Sighing heavily at the situation you were faced with you begrudgingly climbed on behind your ex and secured your hands on his waist.

“You good?” he grunted over his shoulder.

“Just go.”

The wind rushing at you as Happy took off down the street felt like a thousand memories you had fought to forget just slapping you in the face all at once.

The smell of being on the Harley was something you hadn’t realised you’d come to miss. Was it the smell of the rubber? The fumes from the exhaust? The scent of the man in front of you?

No, it was definitely the fumes from the exhaust.

-

Pulling into the Teller Morrow lot was when the weight of what was happening really set in.

More bikes than usual were lined up at the ready, people with children were piling out of cars, sleeping bags in hand, and food was being unloaded left and right, with guns being handled ‘discreetly’ by the Sons.

It had been many months since you had stepped foot near the club. And just as many since you’d spoken to any of the Sons. Well, bar Juice who you’d seen at the store a few weeks back. To say you were nervous would be an understatement. 

As Happy slowed to a stop, signalling for you to jump off before he backed his bike in line with the others, you swore you could feel a million eyes on you. It was as if everyone on the property was staring at you. 

This wasn’t the case of course. With the feeling of danger and caution in the air everyone was worried about their own loved ones and whatever job they’d been given. Truth be told, you didn’t recognise a lot of the faces around you. So they sure as hell wouldn’t know you from a bar of soap.

Still, no matter the case, the anxiety pooled in your stomach.

Anxiety had always been present in your life. Making itself known first in high school and popping up every now and then when it felt like messing with you.

Happy seemed to pick up on your switch in mood, from angry to anxious and lightly spoke from behind, “Everybody’s busy doing their own thing. You don’t need to stop and talk, just head to the back rooms.”

You nodded at his words, eyes still locked on the scenes unfolding in front of you. You didn’t move until you felt the tattooed man nudge you slightly.

Sticking close to Happy, as much as you’d love to run in the opposite direction, you slowly made your way into the hectic clubhouse. 

It was like stepping back in time, you’d done this exact thing multiple times with Happy, the lockdown. The children running wild inside, a group of hangarounds in the kitchen, families huddling nervously at the walls. 

There had been a time when you’d have gone up to those families with a fresh pot of coffee and some baking, helping to reassure them that it would all be okay. How the tables turn.

As you peererd around you noticed the doors to chapel were open, Sons inside counting guns. Your eyes moved over the men, noting who you recognised, Tig, Bobby and Jax, and who must’ve been from other charters.

Seemingly feeling your gaze on him, Jax turned his head and caught your eyes. With not an ounce of shock or surprise in his stare, he nodded at you with a knowing tight-lipped smile, welcoming you back into this world of chaos.

It wasn’t until you finally reached Happy’s dorm that you let out a deep breath. It was quieter back here, mostly out of bounds unless you had the okay from the members, which you apparently did.

You pushed the door open and were once again hit with an alarming wave of nostalgia. Happy’s dorm looked exactly the same. It was relatively bare, but tidy.

It was too familiar. It felt too normal being back here. Like the last seven months hadn’t happened, like they didn’t matter. 

You could feel yourself getting worked up and turned to face the man you had spent years loving.

He remained standing in the doorway, arms crossed, studying you from his spot.

“Why am I here, Happy? It’s been months. You just turn up at sunrise after months of no contact  to play a knight in shining armour? I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t mean enough to you to warrant being here.”

He just stared at you in silence, like he knew you’d get pissed whether he answered or not.

“I’ve been trying to move on with my life!” You continued, now sitting on the edge of his bed, “I’ve been working so hard to forget everything between us. To forget the fucking club. I just - I just want a normal life. I want to be able to come home after work and relax with my partner. I want to complain about my boss. I want to get annoyed about the ads on TV. I want my biggest problem to be figuring out what’s for dinner each night.”

You took a deep breath and stared down at your lap before admitting, “I just want boring.”

Still frozen in his spot, Happy finally spoke up, “You’d hate boring.”

You gave a dry laugh at his response and looked up at him with defeated eyes, “So what then? I just have to stay stuck in this weird in between?”

A silence fell between you as your words hung in the air. 

Relieved you’d been able to get those thoughts out of your system, you fell back onto Happy’s bed.

The silence lasted so long you wondered if you’d dozed off and he’d snuck out of the room when he spoke up, “Stay in here. I’ll send someone in with food later.”

You closed your eyes and listened as he turned and opened the door, ready to leave and do whatever the Sergeant at Arms does during a lockdown, noting the way his movement paused before he spoke again,

“I’m sorry I had to bring you back here.”

As he left and softly shut the door behind him, the first of your tears finally fell.

[thefemmefatalexo]

Toji SMAU - When love was always there.

Chapter One - The Chase

Summary: You see him again on your first day of college. Fuck. Toji Zenin has been the bane of your existence since your first day of kindergarten. Over the 15 years you’ve had the “pleasure” of knowing him, he’s made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. From chopping off your hair in kindergarten to pushing you into a pond on your first day of high school, Toji has done it all. You’d always thought he would choose a college far away from you, but as it has always been, fate came to kick your ass. Hard.

{introduction} ; {Chapter 2}

Warnings: Cursing, Sexual language, mentions of suicide, toji being an ass, angst (???)

—————————————————————————————————————

You don’t look back as you dart through the party, weaving through clusters of people and dodging poorly placed furniture. The music thumps in your ears, but it’s not loud enough to drown out the sound of Toji’s footsteps behind you. He’s faster than you remembered, and the realization sends a jolt of panic through you.

“Keep running,” his voice calls out, low and sharp. “You won’t get far.”

You bite back a curse, turning a corner and slipping out through the back door. Cool air hits your skin as you step onto the patio, your eyes scanning for a place to hide. Your heart is pounding, but adrenaline keeps you moving, your legs carrying you toward the garden. The party lights fade behind you as you push through the bushes, stumbling into a secluded clearing surrounded by trees.

You pause, catching your breath, thinking for one hopeful second that you might have lost him. But then—

“Gotcha.”

His voice is closer than you thought, and before you can react, Toji steps out from the shadows, his hands stuffed casually in his pockets, like he wasn’t just chasing you at full speed. His dark eyes glint under the faint moonlight, and the smirk on his face is nothing short of infuriating.

“Running away doesn’t really work when you’re this predictable.”

You glare at him, backing up slightly as he closes the distance. “What do you want, Toji?”

He shrugs, the picture of mock indifference. “Just making good on my promise. You said something stupid—again—and I had to remind you who you’re dealing with.”

“Oh, please,” you snap, straightening up despite the burn in your lungs. “Is this what you do for fun? Chase people around because you’re too boring to enjoy a normal party?”

He steps closer, and you instinctively take a step back, only to feel the edge of a low stone bench behind you.

“I don’t have to enjoy anything,” he says coolly, his voice sharp enough to cut. “Especially when you’re around.”

The words hit harder than you expect, and for a second, you can’t think of a clever retort. He notices your hesitation, of course, and his smirk deepens.

“What’s the matter?” he taunts, leaning slightly closer. “Cat got your tongue? Or maybe you’re finally realizing you’re out of your league.”

The heat of anger snaps you out of your silence. “Out of my league? Please, Toji. You’ve spent 15 years chasing after me just to be annoying. What’s that say about you?”

His expression hardens for the briefest moment, and you can’t help but feel a small sense of victory. But instead of biting back, he just shakes his head, his smirk returning as he turns to walk away.

“You’re not worth it,” he mutters over his shoulder, his tone dismissive.

The words leave you standing there, heart pounding, equal parts angry and unsettled as he disappears back into the party.

You get back to your dorm around 4 a.m., already regretting going to that stupid party. Thinking about Toji and his stupid face only makes you more agitated, so you head straight to bed after quickly taking off your makeup and getting ready. As you lie in bed, your phone buzzes with a text from Leiri, letting you know she’s on her way back to your shared dorm with some guy she met at Gojo’s party. You reply with a thumbs-up emoji, then place your phone on the bedside table with a heavy sigh.

Characters (added):

[sohnric]

bad idea, right? – k. sunwoo

pairing: soundcloud rapper! sunwoo x gn! reader

genre: exes to lovers, angst, suggestive. i know this is toxic as fuck dont @ me sometimes i like to write shit like this because it's realistic...

word count: 4k

warnings: a whole lot of arguing, swearing, both of them being toxic and childish, a heated makeout session, overall just..messy. so messy.

a/n: similivinlife u inspired this. not my proudest moment but oh well 😵 the original of this draft was for the fic dancing in my backseat on @rrxnjun that i didnt end up using and revamped for this, so if u see any similarities it is because both fics are mine :P and once again, as always, thank u @csenke my sweetest beloved for beta reading 🤍

“I don’t think you can imagine the things I have to deal with about that track, like, I was literally in the town yesterday and around six people stopped me and wanted the backstory and I don’t know what, and it’s really, really annoying–”

Your voice cuts off, being replaced by a beat that makes acid taste on your tongue and hair stand up all alert, like a feral cat’s would when you try to get close to it, making you immediately turn off the song, letting a scream out into your pillow. There’s a storm of emotions inside of you as you take the phone you’ve been listening to the new song on back into your hand and pull up his number– because you blocked him everywhere else in hopes of never seeing his face again– and shoot him an angry text about the matter.

you [7:21pm]: are you kidding me???

you [7:21pm]: you are really so damn egoistical for doing this 

you [7:21pm]: really don’t think about anyone else except yourself huh

you [7:21pm]: ignore my messages again like the last time and i swear to god i’ll send someone to beat your ass

Fingers quicker than your own thoughts, you hammer down the messages on the keyboard, laced with the fury that’s been shaking with you ever since you learned that he released a new track that included yet another one of your voice messages you sent to him. It was excruciating to listen to, to say the least– your dignity stripped away slowly, piece by piece with the unsettling realization that your personal matters are now out there in the open, for everyone to see and judge, for the whole world to pick apart and analyze. Which is kind of funny, considering the nature of your breakup– you’re not so sure his fans would like what they would find out about him, had they dug deep enough.

Not saying that you are innocent in this matter, of course– you just don’t think it’s really fair to not have the platform to tell your side of the story.

don’t pick up [7:24pm]: feisty one aren’t ya

don’t pick up [7:24pm]: what’s this about

Clenching your jaw as you stare at the messages popping up on your screen only a few minutes after yours get delivered– which is unusual for him, to say the least– you work your way through another angry reply.

you [7:25pm]: your song???

don’t pick up [7:25pm]: did you like it? ;)

A dry chuckle escapes your throat at the last message. Of course you didn’t like it. You weren’t really a fan of the invasion of your privacy. You didn’t like the fact that he once again used your voice without permission, letting the whole world listen to your angry words that were addressed to him and only him. What was there for you to like about the song? His cheesy lyrics? The way he acted like he was way above you, belittling you with the power he had over you with all those voice messages? 

you [7:26pm]: yes i loved the invasion of my privacy a lot, thank you sunwoo

you [7:26pm]: isnt this illegal? ill look into it

don’t pick up [7:27pm]: now you’re being ridiculous.. its just a song y/n :) 

Was he being serious? Just a song? What about the prying eyes staring at you whenever you walk through the campus? What about the whispering behind your back whenever you sit in the school cafeteria? The pointed fingers whenever someone recognises that it’s you– the one that dated the good-for-nothing Soundcloud rapper and then broke his poor little heart. Was it ever really just a song?

you [7:28pm]: you cant be fr rn..

don’t pick up [7:33pm]: ah…let’s just talk abt it then

don’t pick up [7:33pm]: i’ll pick u up at 8? 

Staring at the messages on the screen, you let out another dry chuckle. The skin of your fingertips tingles when you swipe across the surface of your phone, opening the messaging app once again and tapping on the little bubble on the bottom, making the keyboard appear. The gears in your brain turn in swift motion as you try to sound nonchalant in your response, typing and deleting the message again, never getting the tone quite right. 

Responding to your ex boyfriend’s jabs and teasing in person seems to be easier for you, contrary to popular demand– you don’t have much time to think of your answer before the time frame between your arguments would turn too awkward with the silence, so you just say the first thing that comes to your mind. It comes naturally to you, though, and while you don’t particularly enjoy the fury and adrenaline that his smug smirks and jarring words make you feel, the tension his sudden messages built up only makes you more hesitant. 

You haven’t met up with Kim Sunwoo since the day you ended things, and you know damn well there’s a good reason for it.

Seeing him around campus or at parties of your mutual friends is a whole other thing than being with him in a closed space, all alone. It’s been a month since you ended things and while you are fairly certain that Sunwoo is a major jerk that is out to ruin your life, you can’t really tell if you’re actually over the major jerk that is out to ruin your life.

Seemingly letting Sunwoo know that you have the chat open, letting him watch your chat bubble pathetically appear and disappear in consistent time intervals, another quick message is shot your way, making your heart drum against your rib cage in even swifter motions. Running your hand through your hair, you sigh and drop the phone into your lap, helpless.

don’t pick up [7:40pm]: i’ll take it as yes

Sighing to yourself, you stand up from your bed and put on some presentable clothes. You don’t want to give Sunwoo any ideas, and that’s why you only change into clean sweatpants and a tank top, not putting much effort into your appearance at all. You need to send him the signal of being nonchalant– although your stance on the way he uses you in his songs is full of anger and resentment, you don’t want it to seem like you care much about the man himself at all.

Dragging yourself out of your room and putting on your shoes, you bump into your roommate Aeri passing you by with a mug of tea, her hair in a towel as she just came out of the shower. “You’re going somewhere?” 

“Going out,” you grunt.

“Oh?” she hums, leaning into the doorframe, “with who?”

The question catches you off guard. Turning around on your heel, you flash her an innocent smile, brain thinking of every possible solution you could use to not tell her that you’re going out with the exact person you’ve spent the last few weeks grunting over in dismay. “No one important,” you start, when her face morphs into a distressed frown.

“Is it Sunwoo?”

“Look, I-”

“It is fucking Sunwoo! I heard you scream into your pillow just now, I should’ve known it was that prick again,” she grunts, her guess confirmed by the very obvious discomfort on your face, suddenly in a hurry when you try to get out of the house in one swift motion and save yourself from the cross-examining conversation that’s surely about to happen judging by the look in Aeri’s face.

“I gotta go-”

“What about all your ‘I don’t ever wanna see him again’ talk?” she sighs, clearly disappointed with your life choices. 

“Look, it’s about the songs he’s been putting out. He’s being an ass about replying back to my messages and god knows I’m not calling him, or else he’d record it and put it in another song like the freak he is,” you squint your eyes at her, making sure your intentions are clear to your worried roommate. 

“Oh, right, because he’s going out with you just to talk,” she mutters, “when all you two have done since you broke up is argue. Mhm, seems about correct,” Aeri adds, making the situation even worse than it already was, because she’s right, after all– when have the two of you held a normal conversation in the past few weeks? Seeing him tonight might just be the worst idea of your life– right after deciding to date him, of course– and you’re completely aware of the fact.

Opening your mouth to answer with a jarring comment meant to put your roommate back in her place, the words are taken off your tongue when you hear the ring of your phone, the notification on your screen flashing with his messages.

don’t pick up [8:04pm]: youre 5 mins late

don’t pick up [8:05pm]: come out

“Look, I gotta go. We’ll talk about this later,” you mumble as you take your bag off the hanger, Aeri’s disapproving eyes following you as you head towards the door. 

“Right. Have fun,” she ironically sings, knowing very well what Kim Sunwoo’s intentions are for the night. Still, you fakely gag to her comment before you’re out the door and walking down the entryway.

As your figure walks out of the apartment complex, you almost don’t notice the man. You were expecting him to be waiting just behind the door, resting against the wall as he usually did back when you two were dating. The sight that meets your eye shocks you a little when you find him leaning against a 2007 Audi A4, the silver exterior of the car contrasting with the darkness of his clothes, hands folded on his chest as he watches you with an overly-confident smirk. 

“Took you long enough,” he teases as you finally cut through the distance. 

“Didn’t know you were so eager to see me,” you bite back, eyes scanning the vehicle. “Did you finally get a car with that new profession of yours? Or is that another one of your friend’s again?” you point towards the car, making the boy chuckle.

“Mine,” he says, “my ‘good-for-nothing career’ is taking off, as you may have noticed,” he hums, referencing all the arguments you two used to have about his dreams and ambitions, making you wince a little at the comment. You never believed in him ever making it big– you just didn’t think his dreams were ever really realistic– but judging by the way it’s been going for him, you must admit you may have been wrong with your snarky arguments before.

“Well, it’s not much, then,” you mutter instead, pretending to judge the state of his old, used-looking car.

“Gets the job done,” he shrugs as he peels himself off the door, opening the passenger side and sparing you a short glance. “Hop in?”

Sunwoo doesn’t wait for you to sit down so he can close the door after you– instead, he walks around the front of the car to the driver’s side, getting in himself– much to the gentleman he’s always been. Making sure you slam the door shut with as much force as you can, just to anger the man and his new toy, you fasten your seatbelt and watch as Sunwoo winces, but doesn’t mention it when he turns the engine on with a turn of the key and drives off the parking lot.

“Where are you taking me?” you ask, watching as the male snickers to himself. The calmness of his composure makes you oh so annoyed, making you despise every second spent together with him in the small space breathing in his cologne and listening to the songs playing through the speakers, reminding you of the playlist he’d always put on when he was given the privilege of the aux cord.

“What? Are you scared I’m gonna kill you?” Sunwoo jokes.

“Seeming that you’re batshit crazy, one can’t know what to expect from you nowadays,” you grunt, making him cheese with amusement.

“I thought I was just ‘a loser Soundcloud rapper that can’t do anything in life’,” he repeats to you a sentence you uttered out upon your breakup, the emotions getting the worst out of you after the way he’s been treating you. “Would a loser like me kill you? I don’t think so.”

“Very funny, Sunwoo,” you ironically bite back, rolling your eyes at his composure. The fact that he seemingly has the upper hand on you in the conversation makes you falter a little bit. “I just wanted to talk about the songs you’ve been putting out.”

“You wanted to tell me how much you like them? Thank you, I’m flattered–”

“No, you idiot. I wanted to talk to you about how uncomfortable they’re making me feel!” you yell out, making the male wince. 

There’s a momentarily silence in the car as the male drives, the streetlamps disappearing out of sight as he drives away from the city, into more sparse areas. His voice is a little more serious when he speaks up now, the lack of teasing in his tone making shivers run down your spine. “I don’t think it’s that serious, really.”

“Really?” you chuckle. “Because I don’t find it fun when people stop me on the street and ask all about our relationship, Sunwoo. Because I don’t know if you noticed, but you never asked for my permission when you used those.”

The sound of your own voice resonates through your brain, the first voice message he ever used in one of his songs (the one that made him finally more popular, funnily enough) making you sigh out in the darkness of the car. ‘Just.. I dunno, I said sorry, I apologized, I don’t know what more you want me to do.. like, what’s going on? Literally nothing, so like.. can’t we just… move on from this and… fucking let it go?’

“One would think you’d stop sending me these after the first one,” Sunwoo utters out, voice low and almost a little amused, which makes you tip over the edge.

“And I would think you wouldn’t use audio of me being vulnerable with you in a fucking song that everyone would hear, Sunwoo!” 

“Oh, did you mean that part where you called me a hypocrite for hanging out with my friends from high school without telling you? Or the part where you cursed me out after you broke up with me because I dared to text you again–”

“I was trying to pierce things back together!” you yell, making the male quiet down, resulting in taking a right turn towards a dead-end, the road approaching a forest. Not a single soul is to be found around here except the two of you, and when he turns the engine off, but stays staring ahead of him towards the trees, you continue with everything you’ve been holding inside of you– instead this time, your voice is more quiet, not having to scream over the sounds of the car anymore.

“I was apologizing. I was trying to make us work, Sunwoo. And just because you didn’t see it or didn’t have it in you to pay attention to me that night, it doesn’t give you the right to exploit me for your gain and make a fool out of me in front of everyone,” you say, watching as the male chews on the inside of his cheek.

“You are the one that broke up with me,” he says into the silence, “not the other way around.” 

A moment of silence hangs over you two like a heavy jacket. You were well aware of the fact– you broke up with Sunwoo after the night he went out with all of his female friends from high school, not telling you a thing about it before you found out through an Instagram story of one of them. You knew he was being petty, you knew he was doing it just to get back at you– because you never passed out on a chance to make him feel jealous, getting back at him for all the controlling comments he would make whenever you went out to clubs with your girlfriends– but it still drove you up against the wall and made you break.

Maybe you and Sunwoo weren’t made for each other. There’s no denying that you loved each other– you just didn’t really know how to handle your relationship. You never really learned how to handle problems. How to resolve issues. Both of you were too immature for the other, and it would never work– you only came to this conclusion after many tear-filled evenings, but coming to peace with it is still yet to come.

“I don’t see how that’s relevant to this conversation,” you say, shaking your head in disbelief.

The male scoffs, turning his head towards you, meeting your eye. “Did you even listen to the songs?” 

“Of course I did, how else would I know–”

“Then you must have noticed that I’m not making fun of you, or putting you on blast, or belittling you, or whatever you and your friends have said about me for the past month,” he counts on his fingers as he recites the words with an annoyed tone, big eyes bearing into yours. 

“You exposed me being vulnerable.”

“I’m vulnerable in these too!” he urges out, eyebrows furrowing at you in exasperation.

“That’s your fucking choice! Don’t drag me into it!”

While you must admit that none of the lyrics Sunwoo’s ever written about you were lies, or making fun of you or throwing harsh words in your direction, you still feel as if a chunk of you has been thrown out in the open, for anyone to pick apart and poke around. You always told Sunwoo you liked his way with words, and there is no denying that his lyrics, although they were painfully honest, were quite beautiful. If you weren’t the one the songs were about, maybe you’d even like them. Maybe you could give them a listen without feeling like you want to crawl out of your skin. Maybe you could add them to your playlist without feeling ashamed that you’re still thinking about the male, picking apart your relationship like every outsider has been doing since the songs went viral, but instead, finding places where you could’ve done things differently and kept him by your side.

It was hard to listen to his words and see the reflections of your past flashing in front of your eyes like a movie. While you admit that he did the timeline of your relationship justice, you do despise the fact that his words are getting to you so much. 

You don’t like hearing about the things you’ve done wrong. You don’t like listening to him apologize– although he would never do so directly. You don’t like to hear him say that he misses you, because it makes it hard for you to keep your fair distance from him.

“I don’t know what I was thinking… Can you drive me home, Sunwoo? We’re clearly not on the same page about this,” you say, averting your gaze from him towards the window.

“No.”

“Sunwoo, can you please drive me–”

“Not until we talk about this, no,” he says firmly, watching you foam over with fury.

“What else is there to talk about?”

“Us!”

“There’s no us anymore, Sunwoo! And I think it’s the time you come to terms with that and stop abusing our failed relationship for your stupid songs,” you bark, throwing daggers into his skull with your fierce eyes.

“So you get to go and post angry tweets and badmouth me in front of your friends, but when I cope in a perfectly respectful manner, it’s wrong?” he argues, scoffing and shaking his head at you.

“God, you’re unbelievable. You’re comparing two vastly different things–”

“Do you not like the songs because you feel exposed, or do you not like them because I’m saying exactly what you don’t want to hear?” he asks, eyes bearing into yours with such heaviness you feel like you could cut the tension with a knife.

“Like what? That you think I regret breaking up with you?” you scoff, shaking your head in disbelief.

“Why else would you pick a fight with me every time I call? Why pick it up at all?”

“Why do you call, then?” you challenge him, chewing on the bottom of your lip. The male leans closer to you, sparks dancing in his eyes when his voice resonates through the car like a low thunder, making the tips of your fingertips buzz and your heart beat faster.

“You know exactly why I call.”

“To make me angry and get me to scream at you?”

“If that means I get to talk to you,” he shrugs, a subtle grin overtaking his features, a churn of your stomach warning you of the dangerous area you just entered.

Eyes never breaking contact with his, relishing in the way his hungry gaze picks you apart, you attempt to conceal your true feelings with an annoyed comment. “This isn’t going anywhere,” you muse, “god, I never wanna see your face again.”

He clicks his tongue on the roof of his mouth, teasing you. “That’s what you said last time,” he says, “so what are you doing in my car then, babydoll?”

The pet name makes your stomach drop, the lightness in your head coming back to you as you furrow your brows at the male, trying hard to come up with a smart remark. Your brain turns into liquid and there’s buzzing in your ears as you try to focus on staying calm and true to your best judgment, but the moment Sunwoo’s head leans even closer to your face, his words render you both speechless and thoughtless as he mutters a sentence that’s barely louder than a whisper, yet powerful enough to pull you in.

“Stop fighting me for once, will you?”

Your lips are pushed against his with force, the kiss mirroring the essence of being starved of each other for the past month. His plush lips move against yours with the skill that only a man you’ve spent tens and hundreds of nights kissing would acquire, his hand placed on your jaw to steady you, adjusting the pace of his kisses just the way you always liked it. 

A force that’s greater than yourself brings you out of your seat and into the driver’s lap, giving the male better access to your throat as you settle comfortably under your newly acquired human chair. His strong thighs flex under you when you thread your fingers through his hair, bringing him back up to connect your lips together before he breathlessly pulls away, gazing at you with a boyish grin on his face.

“Why did we even break up again?” he jokes.

You reply to him with the same lightness of your tone, shrugging. “Because you were a jealous, possessive prick and I had a short temper that always egged you on?” you say, watching as the male pretends to ponder on the information, humming to himself.

“I think I can put that past me.”

“Can you?” you joke, tracing his cheekbone with your thumb, a sly smirk playing with your lips as you lean over him and press a firm, yet short peck to his swollen lips. “Or will you make another mediocre song about it?”

“Don’t call them mediocre,” he squints at you, eyes tracing your face when your hands slip further down his face to cradle his jaw, thumbs padding his lips.

“I easily outdid you on your own song, Kim Sunwoo.”

“That’s why I add you in, actually.”

“Really?” you snicker, tone full of fake disbelief. His hands hold your sides when you lean over the man and latch yourself to his neck, dragging out kisses up and down his warm skin. “Will you make a song for each of our arguments, then?” 

Teeth scraping the skin of his throat, you find the male humming under you in pleasure and satisfaction. He has you right where he wanted you– and although this is not how you imagined the night to go, you don’t find yourself disappointed with the turn of events. The previous annoyance is still there, but now is shielded by the need in you, the longing for him you can’t really battle whenever he is around.

Settling deeper against his body, you feel the male slip one hand into your hair, tugging at the roots of your hair gently to bring your face back to his, averting your attention away from the love bites you’ve been placing on his skin. 

“Unless you give me another topic to write about,” he suggests, his hungry lips swallowing your reply. 

You and Sunwoo were never really good for each other. Too messy, too turbulent, but too consumed with the other to ever truly let go. Seeing him tonight surely wasn’t the best of your ideas– but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t silently hope the evening would turn out this way.

You and Sunwoo were never the ones to make good decisions when it came to the other one anyway. What’s one another badly calculated step in your relationship gonna do?

[latimeria-fell-from-heaven]

𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄, 𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐇

# day 2 — orgasm denial.

s. he's always had an attitude whenever you pointed out how much he stared at you. and of course, he's being a little shit when he's balls deep in you.

cw. fem!reader, orgasm denial, teasing, rough sex, cowgirl position, mutual pining, creampie, degrading, cervix fucking, breeding kink, wanderer being a little shit & implied multiple rounds.

wc. 3046

Wanderer has a serious staring problem.

You know that gut feeling you get when you can just feel someone or something staring at you, even when you can’t see them? Like you could physically feel their stare on you? Well, that’s what your current predicament with your companion is. His stare was almost that of a cat looking at its owner before it pounced, and you swear you could even see his pupils blown wide when he looked at you. It’s not like you find it unsettling or even annoying; the extra attention gives you that nice little ego boost and he wasn’t trying to be a nasty creep about it. But even you have to comment on how frequently you can feel his eyes glued to your form.

He always finds a way to tease you or just tch’s and roll his eyes when you point out his rather blatant staring. In the case of the latter, he just stomps off, grumbling some expletives with his cheeks all red and burning and glaring at you from the corner of his eyes. He more or less resembles an angry kitty when he decides to act offended, all bristled up yet too cute to even give much thought to.

Well, sometimes.

The weather outside is hot, unbearably so, and the occasional humidity waves don’t make it any better. So you’ve opted to start wearing those spaghetti-strap crop tops you bought a while back, and they hugged your chest juustt right, enough to give them that cute bouncy look. You had even been checking yourself, admiring yourself in a ‘wow my tits look hella good’ kind of way. And clearly, you aren’t the only one doing so.

Wanderer would stare at your now exposed cleavage, from little fleeting glances to outright stares that would linger for a bit even when you’d spotted him. Even with his cheeks all rosy and bright, and a hand over his mouth to partially hide his embarrassment away, he still couldn’t seem to bring himself to stop staring at you. But it seems like he doesn’t have the courage, for whatever reason, to make a move on you—even though he had plenty of courage to tell you that your breath stinks in the morning. You’d prefer it if he was upfront about what he clearly wanted, but you don’t mind having to make the first move yourself.

So you tease him a bit; raising your hips and rolling them ever so slightly when he’s behind you, giving him a nice view of your ass, and standing up straight with your back arched (it pushes your chest forward and even makes you look more confident too!) so he can have a nice view of your chest, but not enough so it can leave much more to his imagination. After all, having on some revealing clothes was a lot sexier than having none at all. 

And it’s pretty clear that your little plan is working, because—

“Alright, what are you up to?” He’s got you cornered now, palm flat against the wall as he glares at you. His cheeks are blooming red again, and it’s pretty obvious that he’s trying (and failing) to not stare at your boobs like he’d been doing all day.

“Hm? What are you talking about?” An innocent flutter of your eyes and he scoffs.

“Don’t you play dumb with me, smart ass. You know what I’m talking about. What’s up with,” he gestures to your chest with his eyes and purses his lips. “This.”

“Oh, this? It’s pretty cute, right? Makes me look pretty sexy too. Why, you got a problem with it?”

“What—no, that’s not what I meant,” he groans in exasperation. “You know what I meant. Acting like a fuckin’ tease all day and riling me up. It’s driving me crazy.”

“I dunno sounds like a you-problem Wanderer. I’m just doing what I’d do around anyone else.” His expression sours at that, clear annoyance being plastered all over his face. Seriously, could he be any more obvious in showing what’s going on in that little brain of his?

“So you’re saying that you’d do this to anyone else that just came along?” He spits, lips pulled back in a grimace as if the very thought burns him like acid. “You’d give them a little show just because they seemed nice enough?”

“Hehe, sounds like someone’s jealous~♡” He’s not as subtle as he thinks he is, but that’s a part of his charm. Guys like him who act all tough and teasing but crumple once they’re on the receiving end of it are the cutest, so you can’t help but taunt him a bit!

He chuckles dryly, a bitter smirk on his face. “Yeah, I’m jealous. Just thinkin’ about other guys seeing you like this and even touching you makes me jealous. Happy now?”

You’re grinning stupidly now, practically shivering in excitement as you snake your arms around his neck to pull him in real close. “Then why don’t you do something about it? Go on and fuck me, fuck me so good that I can’t get off without your dick and no other guy can satisfy me like you can~♡”

That’s how you’re in your current position, straddling him as you lowered yourself onto his cock, moaning lewdly as he brushed up against your g-spot. Fuck, his cock was just the right shape for your pussy; not too long but the tip still manages to peck your cervix lovingly and not too thick but he stretches you out enough to feel good instead of in an overstimulating painful way. It’s like you were both made for one another, perfectly aligned to fit like a puzzle piece; hehe, your pussy would even start molding into his cock’s shape, a perfect fit for him and him alone~♡

“You like my dick that much, huh? You slut.” You could feel the smug smile on his face; even with your eyes closed in bliss, you could practically envision his haughty expression. But you can hear the little pants and whines he’s trying to suppress. For how much shit he likes to talk, he’s just as bad as you and can’t seem to get enough of your cunt.♡ “It’s so wet, you wanted my dick that badly didn’t you?”

“Mhmm, I wanted you s’badly~♡ Wanted you to t’fuck me like you own me~♡” Leaning back with your arms behind you to balance your body, it gives him a perfect view of your needy cunt swallowing up his cock and drooling all over it. And he clearly likes it, because he attempts to roll his hips into the welcoming heat and hisses when your walls clamp onto his cock. “But you really suck at making a first move and kept me waiting.♡”

“I do not.”

“Uh-huh, keep telling yourself that. We both know I’m right.♡”

Wanderer scowls, then pistons his cock up to brush the tip against your cervix like a clumsily-aggressive kiss and you respond with a cry of his name. “Yeah, and we both know that you’re a slut for my dick. I’ve barely done anything and you’re already moaning like that.”

“Hehe, y’got me~♡” You breathily moan, too focused on grinding down on him and making sure that he’d rub up against your g-spot perfectly. “Why don’t you make me moan even louder then, hmm? Make everyone else hear just how big of a slut I am for your dick~♡”

“Damn, you…” Wanderer starts, but he’s soon grinning cockily up at you. Oh, looks like your smug companion has a thing for other people knowing just how big of a slut his pretty girl was for him~♡ “I’ll make sure you eat those words.”

His movements start off a bit awkward, what with your body weight grinding down into his crotch and having to use his pelvis muscles to actually move, but he gets the hang of it. He works into a rhythm of slow deep thrusts that occasionally have him griiinding up into your cunt right as you push down, and you two share a collective moan from the depth of his movements. Fuuckk, he was hitting so deep that it almost felt unhealthy with how far he reached, but it just felt so good that you couldn’t be bothered to really even care. If he kept fucking you like this, then your pussy wouldn’t be able to love anyone else’s dick but his; all shaped for him to use and fill to his heart’s content.♡

“Fuck, you’re so damn tight, m’so close…” Wanderer throws his head back on your bed, eyes clenched tight as he bites his lip while your pussy massages and assaults his cock all over. You’re so fucking wet for him, pretty cunt hungrily drooling and swallowing him up to the point where he could feel your slick oozing down to his balls. You really weren’t kidding when you said you loved his dick.

If this kept up, he’d end up finishing inside you and—

—Huh?

You stopped. Why did you stop moving? Why?

“Wha—I was so close, you bi—” You quickly shush him with your finger against his lips. Geez, must he resort to name-calling all the time? Especially right now?

“Ah-ah, watch your language sweetie~♡” The scowl on his face gives him an unpleasant look, but you could hardly take him seriously when he’s got such a cute little face! Ugh, he’s just sooo cute! “There’s no point in cussing me out y’know. It won’t get you anywhere.”

He clicks in his tongue in response, clearly not in the mood to be lectured, not when he’d been so close to bursting. “Don’t you, ngh, dare lecture me. Just move your hips already damn it.”

“Aww c’mon, can’t you just play nice for once?” You pout when he gives you a deadpan look as if to say ‘Are you stupid?’ “Fine. I won’t move until you beg for it~♡”

“You—!”

You hesitate a bit to pull him out because you really do love his cock so much, but he’s being a little shit even when he’s balls deep in you, and you’re not having it. But you work yourself off his shaft inch by inch until the tip just barely remains tucked in past your velvety folds. And you have to admit, you really like the dragging sensation of his cock slipping out as it rubbed along your ribbed walls. You’re really tempted to shove yourself back down and lift yourself up again just to feel him dragging along your walls, but he doesn’t deserve that. Not until he begs of course.

“C’mon, just beg for it. You know you want to~♡” Since you wanna tease him, you do move your hips down, letting your soaked cunt swallow up just a bit more of his cock, teasing him with the addictive heat that hovers just out of his reach. He’s trying and failing to keep his cute moans in, drooling all over himself like the needy little pervert he comes off like.

“Shit, don’t do that,” he rasps, watching in agony as the rest of his shaft goes untouched by your pussy, feeling your juices dribble down and cool against his warm skin. This is torture for him. But when he tries to buck his hips, you just move away, threatening to pop his swollen tip from the confines of your tight wet heat. “Don’t tease me like that…”

“Then just beg for it. It’ll feel good for the both of us.”

“Damn it, just, j-just move already… I can’t take it anymore, I want your pussy so fuckin’ bad—”

“Mmm, that’s good enough, hehe~♡” Well, he could always beg some more, but you’d rather not push him to the point where he’s actually so impatient that he gets turned off. You’ve learned that Wanderer needs a little shove with just the right amount of force so he can do what he’s told. So, lowering your hips back down, your pussy greedily swallows up his cock aaalll the way down to the base.

“Fuck!”

This time his movements are much more desperate, more frantic like he’s a dog in heat. He’s even looking the part too, tongue lolled out to the side a bit, breaths coming out in hot steamy puffs, and occasionally whining with a high-pitched strain. You can only imagine that this much motion must be exhausting for his hips, but the fact that he’s ignoring any possible strain just to pound straight up into you says a lot. All you’re really doing is just rolling your hips, but damn is he doing a good job of fucking you like his personal slut.

“F-fuck, m’so close, m’gonna, inside…!”

“Say it.”

“Huh?”

“Say you want to cum inside of me,” you say with a sweet smile, making sure to squeeze up your walls reeaal tight to bully him. “Or I won’t let you~♡”

You even stop moving your hips for good measure, this time keeping him tucked inside your cunt. He looks frustrated beyond belief, having had his orgasm stopped twice and having to beg for it like some needy dog. Well, you suppose it can serve as a bit of payback for his bratty attitude since he clearly doesn’t learn until you have to fuck it into him just so he can get the message.

“I-I wanna cum inside you, I wanna make your pussy all mine, please just let me cum inside..!”

You giggle in satisfaction, feeling a rush of satisfaction all throughout your body. Getting Wanderer to beg to cum inside you was such a delicious treat, and you’d be sure to savor it fully. Who knows, you might even get him to do this again some other time.

“Good boy, Wanderer~♡”

You seem to catch him off guard when you finally begin to really move your hips, making sure to wiggle them rapidly when he’s sheathed inside down to the base so as it urge on his orgasm. And it works, because he starts moaning a breathy high-pitched noise while he desperately pistons his cock up into your cunt with his hands squeezing your ass, kneading the soft flesh like he owns it. You don’t bother stopping him, since he’s just soooo cute when he gets all desperate for your pussy like this and starts fucking you with rabbit-fast thrusts.

“Wanderer, you’re s’cute, such a cutie, how’re you s’cute?♡” Your jumbled praises come bubbling out like soda pop, as your juices come gushing out with intense fervor, coating his cock with your slick until it oozed down enough to coat his balls. But you keep grinding down, riding out your orgasm for as long as possible.

“Fuck, don’t—don’t move your hips like that!” He likes it when you do it, though, because that thick vein rubbing against your walls pulses a lot more rapidly. You were still coming down from your high, but it wasn’t doing anything to stop you from enjoying how nice his dick felt in your pussy. There was pleasure in being filled.

It only takes a few more seconds of frantic movements from both of you before he follows suit with a whimper of your name, still fucking up into your messy cunt whilst he pumped you full of his thick seed. You have to place your hands on his chest to keep yourself still, giddily smiling as warmth pours into your belly. It was like he was trying to breed you, fill your womb up with his cum until it was full of his babies. Oh, maybe you could tempt him with that next time; get him a little jealous and riled up, encourage him to knock you up then become his breeding bitch until his seed was dripping from your ass to the sheets.♡

Despite having finally reached his high, that didn’t seem to stop Wanderer one bit as he continued fucking his cum deeper and deeper till it reached your womb. He seems determined to truly make your pussy all his, to push his seed so deep inside that it might take root and stay buried within you forever. Hehe, maybe he really does wanna breed you badly; and make you into a mommy, even if he might be acting on those hidden fantasies subconsciously.

Once he finishes fucking your pussy like his personal cocksleeve and giving it all he has, he sinks bonelessly into the soft mattress. His length finally goes soft, even despite the tight squeeze your walls have on it and his breaths become deeper as he calms himself down.

“See? That wasn’t too hard, now was it?” You press a soft little kiss to his sweaty forehead, and he just hushedly groans in response. He doesn’t even bother swatting you away like he usually did when you displayed your affection for him; guess this really had taken quite a lot out of him. Seeing that you’re also feeling incredibly sore yourself (all that arching and hip grinding had done a real number on your back muscles), you snuggle yourself up against him, soaking up the intimate feel of his skin pressed up on yours.

His softened cock was still inside of you, keeping you wide open and making this position a bit uncomfortable, but you’re too busy basking in the afterglow. But if it’s uncomfortable for Wanderer, then he doesn’t show any signs of discomfort. Or maybe he’s just too tired to really notice you yanking his dick about—or maybe he just likes how it feels inside of you.

“Feels like you just drained my fucking balls,” he mumbles tiredly, lazily tossing an arm over your back as you nuzzle into his neck. “Seriously, felt like you were gonna squeeze me dry back there…”

“Hehe, oopsies~♡”

“Don’t you ‘oopsies’ me, you damn sex fiend,” he hisses, delivering a weak slap to your back. “Is it always going to be this way with you?”

“Hmm, I dunno, why don’t you find out? D’you think you can go again?♡”

Upon seeing your flirty grin, he groans in defeat. “You’re gonna fuckin’ kill me one of these days, y’know that?”

🏷. @lakeside-paradise @shrooms-go-brr @sakurakiko

© latimeriafellfromheaven

[candywife333]

Sexy Snakey

ON THE FIRST DAY OF CHRISTMAS, MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME

OFFICIALLY THE START OF 25 DAYS TO CHRISTMAS

ONESHOT

Pairing: enormous serpent hybrid j-hope (mythical creature with *cough cough* 2 Ds) x chubby botanist reader

trigger: dub-con , smut

This lagoon felt super eerie as I ventured further into a small clearing filled with trees. Fireflies zipped past me as I almost stumbled on a rock. What was this place? As such, this forest seemed desolate in the evening when I came to study certain flowers.

Though I was used to looking for different species of flowers in the evening times, something about the atmosphere today in this tiny lagoon unsettled me. I felt the cold breezing rushing around me, flicking my hair back and forth, occluding my vision partially.

The torquoise waters of the lagoon entranced me. As I got closer to peek at what could possibly inhabit the clear waters, I saw a tail? The tail of something lay in the waters. I panicked slightly, breathing in shallow pants as I approached the surface of the water.

A dark green tail of some creature ,bearing the width of my torso was waving around in the waters below. Now I was really getting scared. I should probably run away back to my cottage before something bad happened. I knew the forest wasn't the safest place according to villagers around the area, but I had never had issues before this.

As I turned back around to walk back to the cottage, barely holding myself from sprinting back in haste, I heard a voice. "Hi, darling", a dark voice purred. Pivoting back to look towards the lagoon, I saw something I would never have imagined in my wildest dreams.

It was a man. At least that's what it looked like. A man with a wide grin showcasing two rows of super long teeth (literally looking like hypodermic needles) built to tear into the flesh of unsuspecting prey. His arms and face and torso were all tan, a normal skin tone for humans. Yet, the fearsome part of his appearance was the blue green iridescent scales tapering waist down below him, extending into a long thick serpentine body that I could even see trailing down below the transparent waters. My eyes opened wide, trying to process this phantasmagorical view. I had to leave. And be fucking quick about it.

I started slowly walking away further and further from him. This creature was by no means normal and I did not want to die before I could celebrate Christmas this year. Yep, forget about me coming to the forest to look for my plants anymore this coming new year. Looks like it was a death sentence entering these premises.

The snake man continued grinning reassuringly, his teeth glinting in the weak evening rays of light. "Don't be scared sweetheart. I won't bite". He smirked, "At least, not till you beg me for it". He crooned in a sinister manner, "Why don't you come back and spend some time with me? Let's get to know each other better".

I felt like hyperventilating. A snake talking to me? Weirdest shit considering I don't even indulge in psychedelics. This must be some weird ass dream. But my snark kicked in as I mocked him, "Oh, come closer to you so you can snap my body in half, or choke me to death with that massive appendage and then consume me? That's what you consider getting to know each other"?

I was just a few seconds away from belting the vicinity. His responses stopped me in my tracks. "I wouldn't do that if I were you sweetheart. Riling me up like that when I can already smell your arousal tainting the air".

What?!!! I checked down at my panties in confusion, and surely enough I did feel drenched. As I stood there paralyzed in bewilderment, a green tail reached over and yanked me into the water.

I yelled, startled and terrified that this thing would now eat me alive. I wouldn't see another see another Christmas, or my mom, or dad, or Boo my calico cat. I was doomed. The creature warbled out in a sweet tone, "Stop flailing so much sweetheart. I will give you what you want no matter what".

He ripped off my clothes with his agile hands as I was bound , rendered immobile by his serpentine tail. His slippery tail curled around my bare skin, coating me with a viscous film. Ewww. What the hell? But before I could gag in disgust, it started feeling pleasant. The surprisingly warm temperature of the lagoon water lapping around me, as his tail curled around me, imprisoning me in it's embrace, yet at the same time carressing my stomach and inner thighs pleasantly. The tip of his tail curled around my right nipple, and as I yelped, the tail tightened around my nipple gently squeezing it.

It felt so good for some reason. He continued in this manner for another minute. Before I knew it, I could feel the friction of his scaly tail tip massaging my labia. It felt so good as he rubbed his tail up onto them, teasing the tip between my lower lips. I could feel myself getting wetter, not able to hold back my moans as he proceeded to rub his tail onto my clit.

I tried to be quiet, not wanting to give him an inkling of my arousal but his grass green eyes flashed in anger as he trilled out, "You better let me hear what is mine. Don't hold back darling, if you know what's good for you".

His hypnotic eyes narrowed into tiny slits, his forked tongue flicking out to lick his lips as I mewled out curses , not able to hold back anymore. I must've been quite a sight, legs open wide with my wet slit out to the crisp air, with a thick tail rubbing up frantically over my slit. He gripped the sides of my plush waist in his warm big hands, squeezing my flesh as he shoved his forked tongue into my mouth.

I lost my senses as he advanced the tip of his tail into my dripping pussy. Wrapping my thick thighs around his trim waist, I kissed him back. The scaly tail caught on the walls of my heat, pleasantly scraping against them.

Then suddenly, he pushed my back down onto a small bank of grass in the middle of the lagoon, opening up my thick thighs with his insistent hands, lavishing my clit with attention from his forked tongue. I felt a shiver go up my spine, heat pooling in my lower stomach as he continued to lick and suck. I could feel him nibble around my lower lips with his teeth very lightly. Moaning out of confusion and lust, I arched my back up to meet the attention of his mouth. Suddenly feeling a little embarrassed at my own enthusiasm, I attempted to resist , trying to close my legs, but he wouldn't let me.

He clicked his tongue, droning in a syrupy tone, "We can't have that much shyness now sweetheart". He trailed his long finger through my wet folds, "You are such a treat darling. So wet and warm, ready for the taking. I want to feast upon you, till you lose your senses". His warm breath fanned across my pussy as he encompassed his lips around my bundle of nerves, suctioning it as though he wanted to devour all of it in his mouth.

My slick trailed down his chin as he continued to lick languidly around my fluttering hole , spearing the opening with his long index finger.

I barely blinked when he rapidly replaced his finger with his long ribbed member, sinking it into my tight warm heat. The other member pleasantly rubbed itself across my clit, triggering an explosive orgasm, making my vision go white and my mind blank.

Slowly entering his other member into my heat alongside the other one, I winced, loudly crying out in pain. His hands squeezed my breasts as he pinched my nipples between his index finger and thumb. The pain slowly turned to pleasure as both his members strained against my walls , prodding at my cervix. The delicious stretch made me wrap my arms around his neck, filling his face with my tits that he sucked into his mouth. "Bear it sweetheart. Have to breed you and make you full with my babies".

I processed what he said, trying to shift away from his length that was pounding into my heat, horrified at what he was saying. I was not ready for a bunch of snake babies!!!! He gripped the nape of my neck firmly as he shoved his forked tongue into my mouth further, nipping at my lips and then soothing it with his saliva. Continuously stroking the pudge underneath my belly button, his eyes deviously glinted as he murmured, "Escape is futile". He kissed my brow as he plundered my pussy, kneading the sides of my stomach, confidently smirking, "Good try though sweetheart".

[cosmonini]

The streets of Gotham were always grim. Thick fog rolled down the alleyways and the steady hum of sirens rang all through the hours. You don’t know how you became this you just did. You don’t think you regret it either.

You didn’t have a grand name attached no Bat to your title. No looming silhouette that commanded fear. You went with what you had. Damn, good homemade gadgets and Youtube.

It was better this way. You needed no fame from the public, you didn’t do this for the attention or compliments. You didn’t fit into the shadows you stood out and with the sense of justice you had, it was perfect.

Operating alone. Methods craved from different heroes and Youtube tutorials you followed. It should’ve failed the first day but raw determination plus a hell of a lot of atheliecitsm can lead you a long way.

But this was Gotham, it seemed that no vigilante could remain entirely off the radar. The first time you crossed paths, it had been an accident.

The scent of rain lingered in the air as you sat crouched on a rooftop. An old warehouse in the Narrows. Your eyes scanned the street below spotting people. Drug dealers. Three men, unloading something suspicious from the back of a van. Typical. They were about to make their move when a blur of motion above them caught their attention. 

A masked figure dropped onto the rooftop. A fucking child. The stylized ‘R’ made it clear you were too close. You worked to damn hard to stay away from the bats some snot-nose kid isn’t gonna stop you now. That's what you should’ve said.

It took the dealers a moment to process it. This wasn’t a wannabe. The kid was good. His posture was sharp, his movements precise, as he took down the dealers like it was the easiest thing in the world.

You also should’ve helped but the kid looked like they could handle it. Maybe it was bad saying you admired the kid almost. The way they carried themselves was good more people need to have that confidence.  You just sat there watching until the kid dropped the dealers in a pile and stood there, hands on his hips, waiting.

Waiting for you.

You didn’t move right away, didn’t rush in like some rookie. You let the silence stretch out between you, watching the kid. There was something unsettling about this maybe because he was so tiny.

You haven’t been in the game for to long but you the Bats didn’t leave loose ends. So, if Robin was here fat chance another is lurking near or would be soon. Worst case seconrio Batman shows up. Best case its just you and the kid.

But you didn’t flinch at the either thought. This is Gotham, not going to fix itself. Not by itself, anyway. So you stay brave and don’t break eye conatct. Like cats in the wild except one is a cub- weird thought. Stay on track here.

"You can come down, you know," Robin said, voice sharp. The cocky edge to his words made your fingers twitch. You hated this. But then again, maybe you were a little jealous.

“Did not realize Batman led child soldiers” you stated. The kid tilted his head as if angered by your words. "I’m just here to make sure you don’t screw things up." He was provoking you his stance screaming for you to make the first move.

You exhaled, letting your fingers hover near the edge of the rooftop. "I’m not screwing anything up, kid. These assholes were about to unload some bad shit. I had it covered" you assured.

Robin stepped forward, his boots squeaking as he did. Just before you got cussed out by a child small voices where heard. Not small but far away. It was like you both were on the same brain cell as both moved into action.

Cue fighting sequences where you have to work together to take down a group of thugs. Sorry…

Robin landed next to you as if he’d just been waiting for the dramatic timing. His boots made a soft thunk on the rooftop as he glanced down at the thugs they’d just neutralized, then turned his attention to you.

“You’re faster than I thought," he said, his tone giving nothing away. Weird ass kid. You gave him a brief look. "Yeah? I get that a lot."

You tried to sound casual, but there was an unfamiliar knot forming in your stomach. "You don’t talk much for a vigilante," Robin remarked, his expression unreadable behind the mask. “Most of you have an ego the size of Gotham”

A dry laugh slipped from your lips. “I’m used to being alone” you explained. Finally, you met his eyes or mask you should say. There was a beat of silence before Robin tilted his head, considering your words carefully.

“What do you want out of this?” he asked, quieter now, almost like he was genuinely curious.

It was a question you hadn’t asked yourself in a while. You’d never really given it the time of day mainly because you didn’t want to think about it. Maybe because you fear theres no good answer. You don’t want to know.

But your brain chooses when to work with you. And in that moment you realized with a jolt that you hadn’t really been doing this for anything at all.

"I don't really know," you admitted, voice softer now. "Maybe just... to stop it from happening to someone else. People get hurt here, and no one really notices until it's too late."

Robin didn’t say anything at first, his eyes flicking toward the ground as he seemed to digest your words. When he looked up again, there was still that brash kid you just saw, but underneath maybe he did understand you.

“How weird” he whispered. A laugh escaped from you. You hadn’t expected that but what should you have? He folded his arms over his chest with a huff. "Still, don’t think this means you get a pass,” he said, his usual cockiness creeping back in. "I’m keeping an eye on you”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. “You’re one to talk, kid. You’re practically his shadow.”

Robin’s eyes narrowed an unspoken challenge held between your gazes. “Not his shadow,” he corrected. "I'm my own person." You couldn’t help but wonder what kind of burden it was to live under the shadow of a legend, especially one as imposing as Batman. It was a thought that crossed your mind too often, and one you hadn’t really thought to bring up with someone like Robin of all people.

You broke the silence and slapped a hand on his back "Well, kid, I guess we make a pretty good team. Even if I still think you’re a little too young to be out here." Robin shot you a look, one eyebrow quirked.

The sharp retort died in his throat. Instead, his eyes softened for a brief moment—just a flicker, but it was there. “Whatever” Robin muttered, almost to himself.

“Well," you said, sliding into your usual stance, “I’ll be around. If you ever need a partner who doesn’t wear a cape and make dramatic entrances” you teased with a smile. Robin gave you an exasperated sigh like a grandpa. "Don’t think you’re getting away with that comment."

“I wouldn’t dream of it, kid”

[hetaologist]

APH America "Ethnography" and Headcanons (SFW)

The United States of America, Alfred F. Jones, Mr. Stars and Stripes, 'Merica, Pretty Boy, um... or just simply America.

Here is a list of data I have gathered from this country and oh boy, what an interesting specimen we have here....

Ethnography

You will find this find this mythological creature at your local Walmart superstore during the evening hours on a weekday, sporting flannel loungewear pants (The plaid kind), a cotton t-shirt that definitely has been worn no less than two (2) times, Old Navy $1 flip flops, and a gray jacket.

When asked about his late night runs to the popular supermarket chain, his answer is just simply:

"There's nothing else to do and no where to go."

America's Cart Inventory for March 22nd:

One (1) package of "Mega Stuf Chocolate Oreos" for $5.97, One (1) 6-Pack of "Starbucks Frappuccino Chilled Coffee Drinks" in Caramel Flavor for $7.98, One (1) Family Sized Bag of "Flaming Hot Cheetos" for $5.94, One (1) "Furby Interactive Toy" for $39.19, and One (1) Stick of " Axe Apollo Men's Deodorant Stick" for $4.97. Total of purchase was $64.05 before tax.

When questioned about the "Furby Interactive Toy", he replies:

"Yeah dude, there's this thing I wanna make that's called a "Long Furby". Wanna come by my place and check it out?"

I agreed to the invination as it would give me a better look into his living space and lifestyle. He's very friendly person.

Living Space (Home):

Oh dear god, why did I agree to come here?

House is a what you would expect from a typical American college student such as:

"Saturdays Are For The Boys" banner flag, Marvel and DC posters, a very unsettling looking blue leather couch that looks like it has been through hell and back, random dumbbells and untouched exercise equipment, every game console from the 1972 "The Magnavox Odyssey" to the PS5, action figures from various popular TV shows and comics, an old KFC bucket with half eaten chicken on the coffee table and a shelf with a huge vinyl record and CD collection.

Conclusion: What a fucking gross nerd.

America offers a cold can of Coca-Cola, I accept it.

He shows me a very long light blue "Long Furby" from his collection, further proving how much of a dork he was.

When asked what kind of music he liked (in regards to his music collection), he replies:

"That's hard to answer, it changes every week. Because of my diverse music, I pretty much like everything. One week I could be listening to 1980's classic rock, 2000's techno-pop, Bluegrass Country, 1990's Hip Hop or anything. But, if I had to give you this week's favorite artist, it would have to be Taylor Swift and Doja Cat."

"Interesting..." I replied.

I have recorded enough data for today (the smell was bothering me) and left his home to do further extensive research.

Headcanons:

America has a deep love for cars and trucks, he can be seen working on his vintage 1968 Dodge Charger R/T called 'Thunderbird' (an absolute speed demon that can reach at top speeds of muthafuckin' 156 mph), and his enormous 2019 Ford F-150 'Big John' that he loves to drive to world meetings because he is a total stud muffin showoff.

Oh yeah, he defiantly modded 'Big John' horns with airblasters. So when he parks his car and he sees other nations come out of their vehicles, he pounds on that horn and scares the living shit out of them.

He totally does 2 am donuts in the Thunderbird the front of Walmart parking lots with his brother Canada to freak him out.

Other than seeing him work on his cars while listening to "Waking Up in Vegas by Katy Perry" on the radio, he's in his room sorting out his action figure and comic book collection.

Damn, what what a geek.

He has an eBay account where he buys, trades and auctions his collection as his interests constantly change.

If you think him being a geek, dork and a nerd is gonna save him from getting a basic ass Stanley cup, you're wrong.

He has a navy blue one that he takes to meetings and he would get dirty looks from the other nations.

"Goddamn it America, you do not need that much coffee."

"Fuck you, you scone sucking twink. It's not coffee, it's the Panera Super Charged Lemonade mixed with Redbull."

"I beg your fucking pardon..."

He gave Canada a red one for his birthday that he also takes with him to meetings.

"Canada, mon ami~. That better not be that merde American drinks that makes your heart explode."

"No, it's Tim Hortons iced coffee."

"Well.. that's better than what America drinks..."

[forthedancingandthethriving]

(This is a bit out of order but it was in my head and I needed it out fast so I didn't lose it. For context all of the kids (so Lily, Lil Coding, all four Haltmann siblings, and Timmy) ended up in the same place together without anyone else, got found by the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and their group has somehow ended up in possession of an airship and mostly figured out where Ozzy and Gary's hideout is. Lil Coding has been extremely unhelpful the whole time and making some pretty over-the-line statements about Root, and is getting on everyone's last nerve. This scene is when somebody besides Lily (who has been arguing with him the whole time but can't get through his thick skull because he's calling Bias due to her usual relationship with Root) finally snaps and calls him out on not just his current bullshit, but his behavior ever since the end of Raging Riptides.)

(Also keep in mind that everyone in this scene except Lil Coding and Barney are currently ponies and everyone except the two of them and Lily currently have hooves. Because Equestria.)

“Okay, I have had it with your shit the last few weeks, you stupid cat!”

Everyone on board whirls around in surprise to see that Hex of all people is the one who spoke, and she’s now stomping up to the target of her ire, who makes the mistake of opening his mouth again.

“Wha-”

She briefly pauses her approach and slams a hoof down onto the deck to interrupt him, “Nope! It’s HMG2’s turn to talk!”

“Yes, we get it, you did the “good-aligned cheap knockoff of a villain gets manipulated by a trick-ass bitch” first. What, do you want a medal!? This might be hard to believe, but not everything has to be about you and your problems!

“Now, I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be mad about what Root did -though you probably have the least reason to be this mad out of everyone who was directly involved, quite frankly- or that you have to forgive her! Hell, I was pissed at her too for a while and I’m pretty sure Vee’s at least still on the fence. But at least we’re not bitching and sulking while there are lives on the line or saying a literal disabled and abused child deserves whatever that omnicidal maniac’s doing to her-seriously, what the fuck, man!?

“I was willing to put up with whatever hangups you’re dealing with back home where we weren't mid-crisis and the adults could deal with you, but they’re not here right now and you’ve apparently made it your mission to be as much of a burden as possible, and I can’t FUCKING take it anymore! So you can take your Messiah Complex and Catholic Guilt and SHOVE 'EM UP YOUR HAIRY PURPLE ASS!!!”

By now she has him backed against the ship’s railing and is right up in his face, “Now shut up, get over yourself, and either help us or find a corner to sulk in and stay out of our fucking way!”

She spins around and stalks off, not looking back as he falls over stiff as a board, and sees all the other kids staring at her, “Anypony else have some grievances they need aired?”

Scootaloo ducks back down behind the wheel in a panic while everyone else vigorously shakes their heads, which prompts Hex’s mood to do a complete 180 back to her usual quiet cheer, “Great! Let’s keep going then.”

While most of them go back to keeping the airship running (albeit now visibly unsettled), Lily can’t help but keep looking at her sort-of cousin in confusion, “The hell was that?”

“Well, she is based on SMG4,” Barney notes, “I suppose it makes sense that she inherited his temper.”

WOW. WOAH. OKAY, I LOVE THIS A LOT.

The idea of Hex being the one to call LC on his bullshit is such a nice idea, I love it. The fact that she gives him no room to argue, points out all the flaws in his shit, and still manages to get her point across is flawless. Also, the idea of this pony gradually backing up a cat, that is probably taller than her at the moment, up against the railing is hilarious.

OUGH YEAH,, her being based off of SMG4 too,, man that temper can be deadly when unleashed. At least someone's knocking some sense into LC!!

[transbeeduo]

Bug but it and cRanboo both have reflective ass eyes like dogs and cats and shit. family photos are...so unsettingly sometimes

REALLLLL REALLLLL REALLLLL I LOVE THAT SMMM ranboo looks so fucking unsettling in photos because of the reflective eyes he has but also because they’re so freakishly tall they barely fit in frame most of the time the idea of bug also having thay is so fucking funny ranboo proudly showing u photos of their kids and all of the bug ones look like some kinda horror game

[the-creator-z]

I have to rant about this somewhere because I won’t stop thinking about it until I do.

So, my crusty ass neighbor always hangs out and has a beer and a smoke in the evenings and I went out to sit with him for a bit (trying to be friendly, my mistake), and when he offered me a drink I refused by saying “no thanks, I’m sober actually!” The conversation moved on, I thought we were over it.

Then a few weeks later while I’m helping my OTHER neighbor with her newborn kittens, she says, “so Phil said you’re an alcoholic!”

And I just. Ugh. Ugh. UGH!!!!

No, I’m NOT an alcoholic. I don’t even use that word, even to describe people who do use alcohol. I think it’s a problematic label so I know goddamn well that it didn’t come out of my mouth. So PHIL, this motherfucker, he heard me say “I’m sober!” And in his head translated that to “she must be an alcoholic.”

Listen. Being sober is literally as far as you can GET from being an alcoholic.

An alcoholic is someone who drinks, not by choice but via habit or addiction. Being sober is someone who does NOT drink. Who CHOOSES not to drink. Its the opposite thing. They are opposites.

So she said she lectured Phil to not offer me drinks anymore. I said clearly, it’s okay, it doesn’t matter how many times he offers, I’ll say no every time. I’m not worried about it.

And she’s like ooohhhh but you never know!! You know my husband was such a drunk the only thing that stopped him was being in jail for five years! When he got out he was such a drunk even his PO gave up on him! So you never know whats going to change to make you drink again!

And I’m just like. Ma’am. I am telling you. RIGHT now. That I have MADE the choice, past tense. I NEVER have to wonder. I NEVER have to think about it. I have NO problems being around someone who is drinking. I have NO problems being offered a drink. Because I KNOW. I will. NEVER. say yes. NEVER!!! I know what is at stake and I won’t risk it!!!!!! Never!!!!!!

But she still. STILL!! Decided to have a little bracelet that she got blessed by a priest (derogatory) and hung on my door without my permission. Because she wants to keep all MY juju over on MY side. (I moved it. Fuck that.)

I’m like. Oh MY juju is what you’re worried about? My “my life is in my control”, “I can choose to break generational cycles”, “I get to decide what my future looks like” juju? That’s the juju you have a problem with? Bitch you have 13 cats. You know cats carry the spirits of unsettled ancestors. I think you have your own problems. If anyone’s juju is problematic out here it’s not mine.

Anyways that’s the rant. Don’t treat people in recovery like we’re infants who aren’t capable of making our own decisions. Don’t treat us like ticking time bombs that could go off at any second. Listen to our experiences and take our word for granted.

Also most importantly. Don’t juju anyone’s house without their permission.

[cryptidofthekeys]

welp

my brain gave me what i wanted last night

had a dream with Feppino!

...now I know what y’all are gonna be thinking, oh god its going to be fucking horrifying isn’t it?

---------------------------------------

((Uh-Oh a keep reading bc its a long explanation))

...well ok yeah it was at FIRST bc i was in uh the bruno pizza place, with only a lil bit of lighting and Feppino was stalkin and lurking- I remember not being able to move but I was standing, like, some sort of weird fucking paralysis idk

but I couldn’t move but I heard something skittering, something b i g- I couldn’t even turn around to face who I kinda knew it’d be-

---------------

I just listened to the skittering and then I heard something right above me and the stereotypical horror fashion, I was granted movement this time but only my head, so I look up and wowza,, there he is, hovering right over me, w i d e grin

...okay I won’t deny, when you see him that close to you, he is... Unsettling but,, literally,, as horrifying as the first half was, he just kinda... dripped onto the floor, like just fuckin melted from the ceiling onto the floor and then reformed

----------------

a tall way too long man him is ...here’s where it gets unbelievably less horrifying, I feel like he could see I was getting a lil bit anxious and scared bc I remember his face lighting up and he frowned for a moment before suddenly advancing toward me

-------------------------

and then he kinda just,, he just helped me sit down and then he wrapped himself around me, noodly long arms and even his body in general, he just curled around me and snuggled me (it sounds longer than it should be anytime I describe a dream, y’all this lasted for maybe like 2 minutes tops)

----------------

but it was honestly kinda cute and wholesome, I couldn’t understand him when he spoke, bc it was just,, it was either gibberish or backwards speak- but either way, he very much had no intentions to harm me, I was also finally granted full movement and I just cuddled him back

....also for a funny bit, I remember seeing like,, one of the enemies waltz in- I can’t remember which one it was but needless to say Feppino was NOT having it, he first covered my ears and then I could hear him muffled-ly screeching and that lil bitch r a n

------------------------------

so the moral of this dream is NEVER EVER fucking interrupt Feppino’s sleepy cuddle times, it was scary at first but honestly great throughout the second half, we just cuddled and fell asleep together

....although i do find it kinda funny how my first dream with Peppino was scarier than this, literally- its just that meme of nice cat of the week

Nice lad of the week: Feppino (Cuddled Nicely :D)

Bad lad of the week: Peppino (fucking bit my ass >:/)

[nosecondivelived]

my favourite video essays!! (except i don’t know what qualifies as a video essay and am horrible at summaries. just go with it 💯. i think? tws are quite obvious from the video thumbnails, but if anything needs to be edited lmk.)

This wikipedia article hides a sorrowful secret- Lily Alexandre

A video about two things, a poem found within an old version of the wikipedia page for the fermi paradox, and the creator’s own grief dealing with her grandmother’s death. They may not seem related, but to me they were.

Abortion and Ben Shapiro - Philosophy Tube

Essentially a breakdown and refutation of Ben Shapiro’s anti-abortion argument. Honestly just anything by Philosophy Tube tbh. She is actually hilarious at times and makes bomb ass videos with an absurd amount of research behind them.

Defunctland: The bizarre Garfield dark ride - Defunctland

A video essay exploring the history of and behind a now closed Garfield amusement park ride. The first of two Garfield related videos to make me cry on this list <3

John Mulaney: Could we see this coming? -Ro Ramdin

A video exploring why people were shocked when John Mulaney essentially condoned a transphobic act as his opener. (sorry if that summary is inaccurate, i did not watch clips of the event itself and it has been a while since i watched the video above.) Again, anything by Ro honestly, she is one of THE funniest people on youtube.

These videos traumatised children: The dark legacy of Elsagate - wavywebsurf

I clicked on this video purely out of nostalgia, but it was actually surprisingly entertaining! Spiderman-Elsa videos define who I am as a person and it’s really neat to find out what actually was up with them looking back.

A look inside the war on Pokemon - hazel

A video discussing the reaction to Pokemon when it first debuted. Mostly focusing on the ‘satanic panic’ side of it.

The autistic horror of Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared - Patricia Taxxon

DHMIS is one of my favourite horror-ish series, and while it unsettled me, I never found it scary per se. I love seeing how people’s brains and life experiences affect what they perceive as frightening, even if it’s not ‘scary’? I’m not explaining this well, but it’s a dope ass fucking video. Might not be the best way to describe it considering the tone of the video, but I don’t know what else to say

Every Zelda is the darkest Zelda - Jacob Geller

A video discussing the ‘darkness’ of the different games in the Zelda franchise, how ‘darkness’ isn’t measurable by ‘most to least’ and having something be ‘dark’ doesn’t make it good. Cried at the end 👍 10/10

What the internet did to Garfield - Supereyepatchwolf

I feel like the thumbnail and title is pretty self-explanatory? But it’s a video analysing Garfield, why it’s so popular, and (surprise) how the internet changed it. Made me cry. Also I religiously rewatch the lasagna cat section of this, it was what led me to the analog horror genre! (Though I don’t know if lasagna cat is horror exactly?)

The mythology behind Hades - Ludiscere

I love you, Hadesgame. Supergiant I’ll sell you my left kidney if you let me have Hades 2 now

[trickarrows-bishop]

EPISODE SIX OF HSMTMTS REACTION LIVE BLOGGED BY ME BECAUSE THE LAST ONE WAS FUNNY TO DO AND I WANNA DO IT AGAIN

again, get ready for this to be iNSANE xoxo

woah maddox you cant just appear on my screen and expect me to be ok like HOLD ON NOW-

no one told rina oh ur JOKING-

this'll be like. the worst. especially for ricky oh fuck.

miss jenn's mother's problematic twitter account??? did you mean miss jenn's mother's problematic X account ???

"bigger things" GIRL. miss jenn. no one. and i mean. NO ONE. puts on a show like you queen. stfu (respectfully ily)

"I WAS PLACING A VERY CONFUSING PHONE CALL" so true. i too am confused tbh

OH WAIT MADDOX IS RIGHT THERE WHAT

wait why wasn't jet there. huh.

MADDOX U INTERESTED BAE???

maddox stop hiding it and go kiss her i am TIRED.

BENJAMIN??? love that for him fr

"hahahah... oh u weren't kidding D:" i LOVE MADDOX TOO MUCH SHE BETTER NOT FUCK ASH OVER FFS

MISS JENN WE ARE NOT EXITTING SORRY WE HAVE TWO MORE EPISODES AND THIS ONE SOZ NOT HAPPENING BABES WE GOT A SHOW TO PUT ON XOXO

KOURT THAT FIT GDAMN

anyways she kinda spoke facts. although. im still scared of spiders. nothing can get rid of that fear

all the kourt x ashlyn shippers are about to make this scene their personality and i understand why tbh

FUCK ASH DIDN'T HAVE FRIENDS ??? IM SO IN LOVE WITH THIS SHOW WDYM ASH DIDN'T HAVE FRIENDS LOOK AT HER SHE'S LIKE. PERFRECT. FUCK

maddox stop being gay and just KISS ashlyn im so OVER this yearning (i literally do this.)

BENJAMIN !!UR STILL HERE!!! DONT U FKING DARE LEAVE ILY

BRO FR LOOKING LIKE AN EMOJI WAIT A MINUTE

go on benjamin SHOW EMOTIONS !!!

"i am jennifer !! you are?" "unsettled." i LOVE HIM LIKE A SON

nah that boyband faze for jet makes sense tbh like i can see that

AAWWWWWW BENJAMIN :(

can we pls get a new plot because we did in fact save the musical in season one within an episode. like. i KNOW i can probably skip this episode and not miss much

ALL OF THESE FLASHBACKS TO EPISODE ONE JESUS CHRIST AND UR NOT SHOWING NINI LOL I AM HURT

fuck homophobia AND ILYSM MISS JENN <3 I LOVE HER FUCK

not the mention of CATS BOY THAT AINT A GOOD MUSICAL WHY WE LYIN

SEB ????

FUCKING HELL CARLOS

"give him a chance carlos" MOTHER FR

now why are the whole ass drama class on this what the fuck LMAO

NATALIE RETURN OH MY GOD IM SHAKING LMFAO

this is so out of character like bro no ?? that's not making sense

NORTH HIGH WHAT NO

HE'S PLAYING THE **** SONG CARLOS COME ON

so real of richard bowen he said GAY RIGHTS !!!

SEBLOS GETTING BACK TOGETHER WOHOOOOO

GAYS WIN FR

the longest lasting relationship being seblos is so SO funny to me

YES GO TO HIM CARLOS

THANK GOD FOR THE GAYS

cant wait to cry to this song jesus christ

stop they're so in LOVE I CANT DO THIS

GAYS WON GAYS WON GAYS WON GAY RIGHTS GAY RIGHTS GAY RIGHTS SEBLOS SEBLOS SEBLOS SEBLOS

"us?" FUCK THIS IM SO FSKDAJGHFAKJSDGHFKDAS

now why am i not seeing seblos kiss HUH

"oh so she thinks im a leader?" GIRL STOP IT LMAO

rina scene before they even canonically met alr ???

NINI MENTION !!!!!!!!!!!!

"uncle buck?!" reaL REAL I LOVE THAT MOVIE HE NEARLY DRILLED INTO A GUYS HEAD

"good luck skater boy" hmmmmmmmmmmmm anyways

okay now give me a maddox flashblack

FR IT IS MURDER SHE WROTE SO REAL ???? I LOVE MURDER SHE WROTE !! (im an old person at heart)

GIVE ME MISS JENN BACKSTORY

MISS JENN BACKSTORY WOHOOOO

no WAY ALISON ???

SHE RECOGNISED HER HOLY FUCK WHOAAAAA

not the story of the girl at frozen puking again LMAO

"you should do it" DON'T TELL ME IT WAS ALISON WHO DID IT

"i always thought mrs darbus deserved a power ballad" REAL I LOVE HER

no NO NO GIFTS ??? UR NOT ACTUALLY LEAVING

QUEEN?

NO ??? WHAT THE FUCK

MISS JENN TF? NO GIRLIE.

NO

NOT THIS GOOD THING WE HAVE TWO EPISODES LEFT >:(

"i just got here tho :(" maddox ur so funny but NOT NOW

JET DONT BE AN ASS??

how r we gonna move on from this cuz i-

why am i not crying but was crying over the caswen scenes ffs

OH NOW A SONG ???

emmy ???

EMMY !!!!

my daughter fr

11 mins left oh maybe i'll watch it all tonight HEHEHEH

come ONNNNNN EMMY IS SLAYING AGAIN

THIS IS ALSO WHERE I FIND OUT THATS NOT HOW U SPELL HER NAME

MADDOX AND ASH IN THE SAME FRAME IM DELULU

maddox dont look at ash like that cuz ill run w it.

SHE SUNG AT EAST HIGH WOOOOOOOOO

WHAT THE- ALISON READ?

WHA- UHM- BRO-

maddox IS the stage management

SHE WAS ABOUT TO SAY ILY ??// KFHS

WAIT MAYBE I CAN BE A RINA

I DIDNT THINK WE'D GET TO THE ILY FOR RINA SO

HE GOT IN WHOA LETS GO RICHARD

NO SHES ABT TO MOVE OR SOMETHIN I STG NO

ALR THAT EPISODE WENT QUICKER??? IDK MAYBE I JUST WASNT SHOUTING ABT MADLYN AS MUCH LMAO. conclusion:

show's still gay? YUPPERS seblos? YUPPERS maddlyn? ...hopefully yuppers???

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Turns out I have a lot of thoughts about only the finale, so Im just gonna jot down my thoughts about season 5 bullet-point style before I forget everything and then make a seperate post about just the finale

I liked the return to form we got with it just being Ladybug and Cat Noir fighting villains instead of all these other superheroes that honestly just clutter everything, I am most certainly not looking forward to seeing how theyll handle this in the next season

I liked that they were kinda breaking out of the incredibly consistant formulaic episode structure and specifically that we got more interesting de-akumatizations than just Ladybug physically beating them

Monarchs design fucking sucked, why are his ears just fully out. slut

I quite liked Felix despite all the negative stuff Ive heard about him, I was honestly suprised that he played such a small role this season I think he only had like 6 or 7 appearances in the entire show

Feligami is not even working for me, even if I didnt prefer Marigami and Adrigaminette and even if I didnt think their relationship was rushed and felt obligatory and forced, theres just something kinda unsettling about how Felix has the ability to fully kill Kagami. Like, I dont think hes gonna do it considering how crushed he was when he to get rid of the big red orb that eats people, but it still adds this weird undertone to the relationship. I think the only way to resolve this that I can think of would be to have them swap miraculous, even just for one episode so that we can see that Felix genuinely trusts her with his life the same way he expects her to trust him

I already wrote a whole post about how the mostly male writers of this show clearly dont understand how teen girls react to other teen girls who are compulsive liars, so Im definitely not looking forward to Lila and her bullshit getting even more attention

Its so weird how Gabriel and Tomoe are clearly portrayed as in the wrong for wanting to control their children the way they do, but then when Chloes mom literally does the same thing with basically the same wording and everything its just like, karma ig?? Or atleast thats how I read it with how Chloe was written to be so comically awful for the entire season

Everything involving the Alliance rings was fucking bonkers who came up with that

This season felt a lot less magical and miraculous whimsical, like it was going into more of a weird sci-fi direction which I dont really like

I liked the stuff with the resistance and how the Miracuclass were still trying to be heroes even without superpowers and I liked how they called each other comrades, that was kinda based ngl

Kitty Noirs design sucked ass, who thought it was a good idea to put all those clashing colors on her head but I did like that we got to see Alya slay as Scarabella again that was fun

My favorite episode of the season and possibly the series tbh was Perfection, I actually teared up a little towards the end it was lovely

[crimsun-n-clover]

do you ever have one of those half-crushes where it’s like. you’re so attractive and have an incredible personality and are so great to be around. and if i think about it too much it will fester and suddenly whoopsie another crush on a friend. can’t do that shit anymore.

like we were friends in middle school and recently reconnected completely by chance. the day we reconnected, i was at an event where i knew i might try to start shit. two people who had severely hurt two of the people i love were in attendance and she was volunteering with concessions. we catch up, we’re still compatible, we get along great, and we’re talking about our current lives. she tells me she’s dating a guy who was mr. [our high school] and he kinda sounds like a dick. i’m joking like “LEAVE HIS ASS…. for me~” and she’s responding “honestly i should haha” wtf do i do now??? well i LEAVE like a PUSSY and go catch up with my friends to see if they’re alright being around people who hurt them. they’re not. so i kinda sorta whacked one of them.

my friends are grateful but also mortified. they leave early because they were miserable anyways. i go back to her once the guy i whacked sics his friends on me like “hide me hide me motherfucker had it coming i didn’t do anything unjustified” and she just goes with it. she was actually glad i did it and let me hide out in the concession booth for a bit. she keeps telling me “i love you, you’re the type of crazy i need in my life right now” and i’m just like (thumbs up) because i just hit the basketball captain and have the whole team looking for me. he gives up on me cooperating with their interrogation once they did find me, but keeps walking by the booth and staring at me. i opened the bottle of mustard sitting right next to her and poured like half of it in my mouth to unsettle him and he left.

she was so fucking hyped.

“THAT WAS INSANE OH MY GOD YOURE SO COOL ILYYY” and all that shit and i know damn well she isn’t straight so like,,, interesting.

and now we’re friends again.

so one time i was like “i’m by you so do you wanna meet up for lunch” and she’s saying “yeah ofc!! i’m just waiting on my bf to get here” so i show up and we start talking. by the time her bf gets there, i’ve already picked a fight with some old lady who was being a dick to me and have been working on convincing this girl to join our upcoming dungeons and dragons campaign. he sits down and we make eye contact.

the first thing my dumb ass says is “holy SHIT you’ve got weird eyes… THATS A COMPLIMENT. i mean it in like a david bowie way. i fuckin love bowie” and he turns to her like ???? and she tells him “oh they have TWO bowies on their battle jacket it’s a huge compliment” and he’s just like “oh alright cool” and offers me some of his food. when i tell you this man is a SAINT. putting up with my bullshit and teaming up on her with me. i usually disapprove of the boyfriends my friends have but i actually liked him.

it’s not like i want them to break up or anything. they’re great together. she’s just so. radiant. she actually laughs at and goes along with all the stupid shit i say and do, despite being not the type of person to do that herself.

and even when we don’t talk too regularly, i keep seeing her on dnd tuesdays as i’m walking to the school and she’s walking to the gym. every week i try to convince her to join us, but alas, the gym rat is too strong willed.

“pleaseee” “i can’t” “don’t you wanna join the campaign because you love me so much and you want me to be happy” “i do love you” “i’d be ETERNALLY INDEBTED TO YOU MILADY” “i have shit to do” “more important than little ol me? i’ll make your character sheet for you AND make your stats crazy bonkers high” “do you have any idea how disappointed my parents would be” “GOOD. when you finally push them over the edge you can live with me in my car. i already have blankets stocked up under the seats. and a stuffed cat. his name is clarence.” “i’d love that” “SEE” “is clarence stolen” “….” “oh my god”

like isn’t that kinda cute? chronically bitchless dungeon master trying to charm local dedicated gym rat into playing the nerd game and will actually give up a dice set from their hoard for her.

what a headline.

she’s carrying her workout bag and i’m holding fifty pounds of illustrated guide books BEGGING her to just follow me and watch me start fights between the players for “character development”

in yeehaw terms, i’m a bit sweet on her. a BIT. but as long as i keep my distance and don’t ask if her and her bf are still together it’ll be nothing. but if she joins my campaign? and i get to cast her as a paladin druid (at least that’s my suggestion)?? and she’s single???

i’m fucking HOPELESS. but those are crazy specific circumstances so like i’m probably alright.