#and specifically mentioned unhealthy eating habits

[babysizedfics]

May i request hc about pearl? :) - 🐞

shall we say she kinda hates people when she's in her teen regression??

like usually she is so ready to hang out and mess around, offer support to friends, just generally have unexpected visits. sure can get a lil snarky when she's not in the mood to be interrupted - but she's not typically a hermit to lock her door and shut the curtains on a day off...

but she is so not up for ppl annoying her when shes 'regressed' (in quotations bc she doesn't like usin this word but for the context of this blog. yah)

she just uses this headspace to like.. rlly connect with herself, chill, not worry about much, give herself a break to not be so clean and tidy, to not worry about super nutritious food, not worry about ppls expectations

and when someone comes into that space? gtfo, she's not havin it. she doesnt wanna stress abt how shes coming across to someone and she definitely doesn't want any responsibilities or emotional chats comin her way.

so she literally does lock the door and shut the curtains and spend her day in the dark, surrounded by blankets and cushions, games consoles all set up, no plans to cook a real meal just snackin on chips and candy, maybe the odd sandwich

and if someone dares to knock on her door on a teen day?

My Chemical Romance gets blasted from her subwoofers and rumbles the ground at the poor hermit's feet... they quickly realise maybe right now is not a good time

also this adds weight to that time she asked etho to join her for a teen day!! like she would never let a grownup or little kid into that space because They Wouldn't Understand but when she thought Etho was like her and had these teen moods she assumed it would be a great time to play multiplayer shooters and snort-laugh over popcorn (of course that didn't happen)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I tried to covertly exclude one of my friends from game nights ? 🎮🎧📞

tw: disordered eating, self harm

I've got a discord friend group of about 15 people though only 10 or so are regularly active and game nights often are usually around 6 people but they rotate who participates often. We're all in the 20s and mostly nonbinary / genderqueer / trans one way or another. I'm 25 ftm personally (they them) and the friend this is about in particular is 22mtf (she/they).

Friend is really excited to hit the 1 year marker in her transition and loves sharing how excited she is about her progress - how strangers at her job are gendering her correctly more and more often, how her cup sizes are growing, how much weight she's lost, wardrobe updates, getting to learn girl things from their very supportive mom, etc etc etc. It's all very exciting, I remember hitting my 1 year marker and i'm genuinely really happy for her.

The thing is I struggled with disordered eating in the past. Several others in our friend group have as well and it's something we've talked about both in related and unrelated convos to this issue. Friend keeps an excel spreadsheet with her measurements from bust to hips to weight and will update us frequently whether we've expressed interest in hearing the exact numbers or not. Exact Numbers was one of the things I kept track of and hearing her tracking them (for very different reasons) will often set me off and i'll start taking more and more unhealthy actions, falling back into disordered habits.

Friend has adhd and very poor impulse control. She often joins conversations and talks over people, completely changes conversational topics on a dime, or forgets who is in a call at any moment and brings up someone's triggers. She'll almost always apologize if someone mentions a social mistake she's made, but because the weight/food intake/number watching is so important to them as a way to track their transition it's the one thing that keeps coming back and back and back. I and the others have tried talking in voice calls, mentioning in text chats in the group and even DMing her but because of the topic and this group being the friend group she feels safest in (we were all the first to know and hyped them up on the hrt journey) these are some convos she only gets to have here

and because of the topic, i feel rude or embarrassed when I have to say "hey can we not talk about this right now or i'm gonna have to leave". So on most nights if it comes up I'll just deafen / go afk / just zone out entirely until the conversation has passed. If it doesn't seem like it's going to or they are so in depth that it's genuinely triggering a self harm response i'll fully leave instead so she can keep having her fun and get excited

Game nights are different though

I'm usually the host of game night and so can pick when we play our silly little games. Obviously people can and do still hangout and do things together Not on specific game nights, and we all do, but game nights are my thing. We play party games over discord or multiplayer competition games or lately have been getting into games like content warning and lethal company when there's 4 or sometimes 5 of us (either someone wants to hang out but only watch or we rotate around who plays round by round)

Friend is often working in the evenings and so bc this is an online friend group they don't actually know my work schedule. We usually only have about half the total number of participants be around for game night anyways, so I've been thinking of occasionally lining up game nights for nights when she's mentioned being busy by saying i work the other nights - but only sometimes. I do really like friend. She can be so much fun to hang out with, excitingly competitive and with interesting knowledge to share and generally a good sport no matter the actual game we're playing. But sometimes the worry about the triggering and the trigginering itself are too much. sometimes i just can't handle when she does it and knowing i can't leave and asking her to stop expressing her joy makes me feel like an asshole anyways so i don't want to be around it.

To be clear. I do not think they are an asshole. Friend is genuinely one of my friends. I like her and hanging out with her. they do not trigger me (or any of the others w this same trigger) maliciously. this is solely would I be the asshole.

TLDR: My friends way of tracking her transition sometimes triggers my eating disorder. would I be the asshole for planning game nights that I host and cannot leave / tune out conversations during so that she cannot attend as often in hopes that I am not triggered as often?

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[sepicriting]

I was wondering if you had any nsfw headcanons about the twins? *cough cough* varis specifically

yandere twins part two

―for you, they're willing to give chase.

directory: part one here. contents: yandere male x gender-neutral reader. yandere female x gender-neutral reader. only references to darling are 'you' and 'darling'. drugging mentions. nsfw headcanons midway. implied dubcon.

notes: i saw this as an opportunity to insert the second part of the introduction, eat well!

ageless blogs and those below the age of seventeen, dni.

With the people around you leaving slowly but surely, you could only become closer to Vitalina and Varis. Your friendships with others would slowly fade to nothing, and the past few months you'd spend with the twins would have you absolutely spoiled. Any remnants of guilt would dissipate as you grew accustomed to their spending habits when it came to you. And while you could admit that their favor for you was sometimes bordering on unhealthy, you couldn't bring yourself to speak up. It's not like they were hurting anyone, right? And they're always doing what they have to so it's not like they were destroying their own lives either.

Oh, if only you knew.

How they outwardly expressed their love for you was nowhere near as tame as they behaved themselves with you. You'd never know how many ugly words Lina uttered about other people, how many lives she's ruined so you could stay by their side. You'd never know how many bodies, dead or alive, went into the back of Varis's car. The times of Lina slipping drugs into countless drinks, or the times Varis's knives sank deep into many flesh.

Any line that could be crossed, at least one of the two has walked over for you. It's all for you.

You wouldn't know you're holding hands with ones who have killed before, nor would you realize the lips coming to press kisses on your hands are the ones that drove someone mad. But that's not something you should know, they love that you're able to enjoy your time with them. They're just waiting for the right moment to tell you how deeply they adore you, that's all.

And when they decide that it is time, they'll be expecting a positive response from you. They've done their very best endearing themselves to you, spending quality time, giving gifts, doing you acts of service, so can you please let them into your heart?

Of course, they'll give you time to think about it! Just think very carefully.

The moment they realize that you're comfortable and secure in your shared dynamics, they'll be more attentive to your reactions whenever they initiate intimate times.

They would stay as detached from each other as possible throughout sex, as they aren't into incest, but they'd work together so you'll feel heaven.

Your first time will be with both of them of course. They'll make sure you'll be pampered and spoiled by ensuring you'd just be lying down. Just stay good for them and they'll take care of the rest.

For as much touching as Varis enjoys doing, Lina will always be the one to initiate if you don't, with innocent kisses turning heated the longer you let her lips on yours.

She'd tug on your clothes and start begging if she could please start touching you? Though Varis would cut in before you could answer so he could have a taste of your mouth.

And where Lina's desperation lies, Varis's greed reigns. His kisses will never be anything short of intense if he's the one who initiates them, always ensuring that you'll be gasping for air by the time he pulls away. And in that duration, Lina would have already made quick work of your clothes and you'd be half-naked.

She'd take a moment to appreciate your nipples, circling them before she'd gently press down, leaving kitten licks and kisses all around before she'd move downwards.

And Varis wouldn't pass up any opportunity to mark your neck after he kisses you dizzy, leaving a trail of dark hickeys while he begins to palm you through your underwear. Trailing your arousal, yet never quite adding the pressure you want. It's only when Lina reaches your lower half that he'll relent, moving out of the way to let her unveil you as if you were her favorite present.

Every time that she sees your arousal, she'll always stop to stare. Who wouldn't? You're everything she'll ever want and more, and she'll always be eager to please if it means you'll let her see these parts of you she adores. She'll make sure to slowly rub you, kissing your inner thighs before she descends her head to feast on your hole as if she were starving, diving her tongue in without caring, listening to your noises as her wetness begins to pool.

Varis will take his sweet time teasing your upper half while Lina occupies your bottom half, palming his cock too with one hand while he watches you moan when he nips your chest and leaves lovebites everywhere.

The instant you cum for them, Lina will make sure she gets every last drop, lapping you clean before she pulls away to sit beside you and press kisses to your face, all the while Varis would take his spot between your legs.

He'd tug his pants off, letting them fall to the floor, and kick them off before leaning forward to tower over you. He wanted to be the one to finish you off, hushedly whispering for you to relax before kissing your collarbone and then pushing himself in.

To say that his length was long would be an understatement, he was stretching you out and he hasn't even bottomed out. He'd kiss your forehead in an attempt to ease you as he sunk further in, but the relieved smile he would give you would leave you feeling butterflies in your stomach.

And he'd wait a moment so you to get used to him, not minding how Lina would reach and turn your face to her for another kiss.

But once she pulls away, Varis would be done waiting, and he'd be pulling out to thrust into you in one go, groaning against your throat and biting softly. It felt good to hear your cries and the soft noises that escaped your lips, your volume increasing with every fervent movement of his hips.

With every grunt Varis gives, every kiss Lina steals, you'd inevitably come undone first. The feeling of being held tightly and surrounded with warmth makes your orgasm almost worth it. Almost. But there's still time for Varis and Lina, for their release too.

You'd watch them, realizing that Lina had been knuckle-deep into herself all this time, nearing her climax from just watching, and Varis's fingers were beginning to dig painfully into your thighs as his thrusts slowed down, compensating for how deep and good it felt, sending you into a state of overstimulation.

You were theirs now, nothing could take you from them and Varis was going to make sure to rail that fact into you. That way, should you ever come to question their devotion, you'd at least never doubt the intimacy they give.

And the moment they near their end, their breathing would grow ragged until they each reached their peak. Lina would immediately snuggle to your left, eyes glazed over from the afterglow of pleasure, while Varis took to your right, a quiet smugness in his eyes as he silently admired you.

Even through the emotions you felt at that very moment, you would receive a loving kiss from both sides, just as you deserve.

[evan-on-the-internet]

writing some Manberg/Las Nevadas era Tubbo hcs for @best-vice-evr/@las-nevadas-business because I'm bored

warning; discussions of various types of abuse, alcohol, trauma, subconscious victim blaming (very specific), unhealthy behaviors, and overall a not very healthy situation.

I'll add more if I missed anything, but I think that covers most of it.

1. He sits out in the hallways most nights, waiting for the noise to stop. It's more to confirm that Quackity ended up asleep and resting.

2. Tubbo has a habit of taking on more than he can handle, to try and lighten things for Quackity. It usually works, so he never really stopped.

3. on the nights that Tubbo can't sleep at all, which are a majority of them, he ends up trying to fix up the messes Schlatt leaves behind. It always ends before dawn though, not wanting to risk waking the older ram up.

4. Tubbo knows a lot of medical information to better suit what injuries Quackity has, to ensure that the avian is receiving the proper treatment.

5. The only gift Tubbo received from Schlatt in the Manberg era of things was a locket with a picture of Tommy in his L’Manburg uniform in it. He still wears it around most days.

6. on the nights Tubbo went to visit pogtopia, he would only leave if Quackity came with him. It was more of a safety thing.

7. In the Las Nevadas era of things, Tubbo genuinely believes his experience in the Manberg era wasn't scarring in comparison to what Quackity’s experiences were like.

8. Tubbo likes using the ‘:]’ and ‘:[’ and all its variants like Quackity, but he also uses the emoticons —(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)— like Schlatt.

9. Tubbo has more of Quackity's genetics and generally takes after Big Q, with the exception of a few things from Schlatt. (Like his Ram traits, and the way he acts when he's overly stressed out.)

10. Tubbo genuinely didn't know what a healthy, stable marriage was meant to look like until he met Ranboo. And as a bonus; he was terrible at hiding that he liked them. He was also awful at hiding that he liked Tommy.

11. Tubbo's a light sleeper, he always has been and always will be. It's just how he is.

12. Tubbo very frequently makes sure that Quackity is intaking a healthy portion of food every day, always setting aside a bit of his own meal to give to Quackity. It eventually ended up in him having disordered eating habits. (He'd do it all over again, because it meant that Quackity actually took care of himself. And that was all he wanted.)

13. Tubbo's known about Quackity's cannibalistic habits since a few nights before the funeral for Schlatt was held. To keep the peace, he never said anything about it — but he's known.

14. Tubbo regularly visits Schlatt's grave, bringing him dried out flowers and small trinkets. He hates what their life was like with Schlatt in Manburg, but a small part of Tubbo misses him. It hurts a bit more every time, but Glatt is making things better.

15. Tubbo is mostly sober, occasionally taking a few sips of something alcoholic. He’s almost always sober any other time though.

16. Tubbo's a bit of a collector, taking trinkets and anything he deems ‘pretty.’ Most trinkets are in his bedroom, but a few are in his workshop too.

17. Speaking of his workshop, Tubbo spends a lot of time in there — mostly because of his projects, but as mentioned in headcanon two, it's also a habit to try and take on more than he can handle.

18. The official cover of the song ‘fries’ from the show Adventure Time is the way Tubbo invisions his relationship with Schlatt. Something more soft and bittersweet, rather than the mistreatment and hurt it actually was.

19. THE ONLY HC I'M WRITING FOR POST–RANBOO’S DEATH: Tubbo planted an entire garden of pretty flowers (mostly alliums and white flowers) after the passing of his beloved partner, and takes Michael to visit the garden every night before bed.

20. Tubbo tended to stay away from Schlatt unless the older was entirely sober, mostly because he wanted Schlatt's attention and he wanted to be positive that it was REAL. Like, Tubbo understood that the loving attention wasn't ever as genuine as it was when Schlatt was entirely and fully sober.

21. Speaking of — Tubbo slowly started to become more and more comfortable around Glatt, until eventually they had a pretty wholesome relationship. Especially since Glatt has shown that he can, and will, act better than Schlatt ever could.

22. whenever Tubbo gets really silly, he acts like a little kid with a ton of stimming (usually flailing his hands, stamping his feet onto the floor like hooves, and doing silly little spins)

23. Tubbo has been taking care of others more than himself since the very first month Schlatt was drunk almost daily. He never really learned to put himself first — he still has a ton of issues with it.

24. Tubbo was in denial of being trans for awhile, not wanting to accept the fact that he was just a bit different. After a long talk with Quackity though, he calmed down, and started to accept it. (My silly boy :[..)

25. Anytime an adult is drunk, mostly Quackity, Wilbur, or Glatt, Tubbo tends to avoid them. Alcohol still makes him uncomfortable for the most part.

26. Tubbo feels most comfortable around Quackity, and always has for the majority of it. Although, he's definitely working his way to being more comfy around Glatt— and he's come to view Wilbur as an honorary parent. He still favours Quackity though.

27. As said in headcanon eleven, Tubbo is a very light sleeper. Anything, even the softest of noises, could wake him up, since he's so familiar with having to be ready for ANYTHING as soon as he wakes up. It's almost impossible for Tubbo to sleep soundly, unless he's asleep in Quackity's nest.

28. Tubbo is very emotionally stunted. He doesn't really take the time to feel his own emotions, but he tries to hold the space in his heart for the people he cares about. He holds as much space in his heart as he can for the people he cares about, but he doesn't really leave any space for himself.

29. Tubbo very frequently forgets to take care of himself, and when he does, it's never for as long as he subconsciously craves. As a bonus, he frequently forgets to take breaks when he's working — since he's never really had the chance to.

30. As said in headcanon eighteen, there are two songs I associate with Manburg hornsduo. The official cover of the song ‘fries’ from the show Adventure Time, but also Vampire Empire (the demo & the full version) by Big Thief.

AS OF NOW THIS IS CLOSED!!! MOSTLY BC I DON'T HAVE ANY MOTIVATION >_<

If I do end up getting more ideas, this will be updated :)

[shobio-enthusiast]

A thing or two about Tendou Satori / Taking notes

Pairing: Ushijima Wakatoshi / Tendou Satori

Summary: "It was only natural, he thought, that Tendou was a recurring topic in the notebook he’d specifically picked for his absent-minded class notes. He was his best friend (as unnatural as that sounded– Ushijima’s mind still abruptly paused whenever he thought about it, and he had to remind himself that the term was only fitting, as Satori had said so himself) and sat next to Ushijima in nearly every single class. He also thought that writing down information about one of his teammates came in handy, sometimes– at least, it was certainly more useful than knowing when was the last time one of his classmates had cut their hair.

Later on, he realized it was a bit unnerving that that's the only reason he found out about Tendou's thing with food

(Ushijima writes random notes because it helps him focus in class. Accidentally, said notes turn into a study of his best friend's habits– especially the unhealthy ones)

Tags: canon compliant, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, getting together, fluff, eating disorder recovery, mentions of self-harm, self-esteem issues, mentions of smoking and alcohol, mental illness, implied autistic Ushijima Wakatoshi, slight nsfw, background kagehina. Sounds a lot angstier than it actually is i promise it's mostly just Tendou being sad and Ushijima helping him 😭

There will be additional trigger warnings in any chapters that include graphic descriptions.

Ao3 link (posting soon!)

(feel free to ask me to tag u when i post it!)

[destiny-in-the-universe]

more updates! [rc9gn post]

currently working on something for an ask i received and let me just say, this is going to be incredibly chaotic lmao. also why does ao3 have such little tags for RC9GN, give me more i'm begging. it should not be this niche of a fandom!

that show had so much potential- but anyway, here's some more under-the-cut headcanons about our title lead Randy Cunningham!

Randy Cunningham Headcanons

Like mentioned before, this kid has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder- specifically ADHD-C (which just means he has combined inattentiveness and hyperactivity)

Thanks to @mrfartpowered, Randy comes from a rich family! Though both his parents are workaholics and hardly come home which means Randy's left to his own devices

He doesn't fully know how to cook, but he knows enough basics to not completely starve when he's alone at the house- also because he and Howard eat out a lot at like, Charlie Cluckers and PJ McFlubbusters (?)

Randy literally doesn't mind paying for things because his family's kind of fucking loaded!

He has Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and struggles with not completely giving up in one-go when he fears he's about to be rejected, when he's about to do something wrong- it comes and goes, but there's no way he isn't a little insecure

He's developed a curiosity for law ever since becoming the Ninja. His parents are in awe about it because they think he's wanting to become a lawyer (he doesn't-)

Randy has always been an intense fan of the Ninja as we know from canon. He kept a lot of memorabilia over the years and never parted with it- he wanted to help people, deciding if it wouldn't be the Ninja, he would do other forms of service. Imagine his surprise when he's actually chosen to be the Ninja

He looks up to the First Ninja. Like, a lot

I'm trying to not accidentally spoil anything in the headcanons, but okay this has to be one of my favorites: you can't convince me that Randy wouldn't use more powers he found in the Shadow Warrior's part of the Nomicon

The Ninja Suit can only protect Randy from only some injuries- if anyone read my tengu! Howard fic, the suit will automatically have a defense/safety mechanism built in to heal any severe injuries/wounds- it sort of overrides the user and knocks them out (especially when it comes to near-death experiences)

If there ever was a time when a Ninja had to decommission early (coughs Mac Antfee coughs), someone else would have to be chosen- it's sometimes a hastily chosen decision but this rarely- if ever- happens. Somehow not many notices

Angst Headcanons

There have been times when Howard has needed to patch Randy up after some nasty fights- this one time Randy didn't make it back after a battle and he was found with a nasty gash, barely managing to stay awake and it freaked out Howard a lot

Randy sometimes uses the Nomicon to avoid his problems- it's become an unhealthy habit but he can't quite bring himself to stop

You can't tell me he doesn't dissociate. When Randy isn't actively doing his part in being the Ninja, he tends to space out a lot and he isn't all too present to say the least

This boy does have some scars. You can't convince me otherwise

He doesn't really question his self worth as the Ninja, but the thoughts still come sometimes- wondering if he's doing a good enough job, if the Nomicon hadn't made a mistake choosing him. It eats him up more when his RSD acts up

Randy does his best to impress Finja and feels horrible everytime he feels he's messed up. He doesn't like seeing others' disappointed (gee, I wonder why /lhs)

He feels responsible for others getting hurt-

I don't have much else to add, but let me just say I'll be doing another post soon! I have something kind of fun planned when it comes to the currently unofficial canon for Into the NInjaverse! I'm kind of hyped and all over the place today!

[humanintownau]

~A few updates + canon facts about each character~ (Sorry for the lack of uploads, school has been draining)

TW: Alcohol, smoking habits, etc. Don't do these things, kiddos🤠)

• I have begun to draw the first page of the comic

• Sammy is getting a redesign. Now that I look at his designs, I can tell that I was sick during the period I drew him in

• Katie is getting a redesign. She'll still be the same, but she will get clothes a change

• I wanted a little change, so I made the toon characters be drawn with my "Pencil" pen, and the Non-native toons get the more "realistic" brush (shading, lighting, so on...)

Now, for the little (overly specific) facts! (Random as hell, but better than nothin')

• Benedetto always takes care of his looks. During fighting, during combat. Not to mention his dental hygiene is better than a dentist's.

• Daniel hates vegetables with a passion. Eats very little, and often suffers from magnesium deficiency (one of many).

• Benedetto scolds everyone for being unhealthy, but smokes a pack of cigars a day and drinks plenty of liquor.

• Katie loves to tease people she likes (loves). Not naming them for spoilers

• Samuel, if you couldn't tell, has plenty of Alice Angel and sheep features. I wonder why...

• Boris was the cause of Bendy's smoking habits. He regrets it dearly.

• Katie enjoys knitting in her free time. A complete opposite of her 'job'.

• Cinnamon is named Cinnamon because she is great at cooking! And you know Daniel will be the first in line to eat.

• Benicio's favourite alcohol is whiskey.

• Boris' favourite alcohol is simply some cold beer.

• Daniel is afraid of alcohol.

• Katie drinks whatever is close by

• Daniel doesn't trust anybody. Not even Benedetto who has been nice (somehow) to him from the start.

[gh0ulixs]

Danny "Jed Olsen" Johnson Headcanons (pre-entity)

━━━━━༺༻ ━━━━━

(TWs for Brief abuse mention, smoking/alcohol, and Skin Picking/SH, and unhealthy eating habits)

🔪 Got the Alias “Jed Olsen” from an ad in the paper. They were from separate companies and he smashed the names together to get “Jed Olsen”

🔪 Danny is actually quite tan, considering he works during the day and is in the sun quite a bit.

🔪 He has ADHD.

🔪 Danny is Bisexual, but has a preference for men.

🔪 This man. Has seen almost every horror film to ever exist. He has three bookshelves filled with VHS’s in his home.

🔪 Danny is a dog person.

🔪 Out of the serial killer persona, he’s actually a pretty funny guy.

🔪 Danny takes other pictures besides the crime ones: Landscapes, people, you name it. He just loves photography. Ol’ Philly really lifts his spirits.

🔪 He uses He/Him pronouns.

🔪 Danny is around 30 years old. He’s not too young, but not ancient either.

🔪 He loved tacos. He has a taco stand he went to and loved so much that he specifically kept the owner of it off his victims list.

🔪 Despite him seeming agile, Danny is actually very clumsy at times. The excitement of chases trips him up and he usually ends up a little bruised after a kill.

🔪 His Sedan is black, and he has one of those funny sun dancer things in it. He also keeps pine air freshener there.

🔪 Speaking of the car: It's definitely not well taken care of. The AC is broken and coffee cups, photos, take out boxes, and notes litter the backseat.

🔪 Danny suffers from a few mental health issues, mainly NPD and BPD. He’s still human, after all.

🔪 Danny usually goes a while without eating, due to work and his “other job” as he calls it. He only really eats when His body is physically suffering due to lack of nutrition.

🔪 He is an ENTP

🔪 Danny enjoys strong beer.

🔪 When he first moved to Roseville, He had worked at a haunted house during October. He only worked there a day, though- The serial killer instincts kicked in and he couldn’t risk getting caught.

🔪 Danny’s father was most likely also a killer, or at least an abuser.

🔪 He fucking hates kids. Danny cannot stand them. Don't let him near yours unless you want them to be the next headline on the paper.

🔪 Danny has a very nice scent: He smells of Sandalwood and cologne. His ghostface costume smells of blood and sweat most of the time, but can smell really nice when washed.

🔪 Danny has a few small scars from shaving on his jaw.

🔪 Danny is actually a pretty good cook, he just never has the time.

🔪 He drinks black coffee: Not for “manly” reasons, just for taste.

🔪 Danny has a godly spice tolerance, surprisingly.

🔪 He enjoys rock, especially 70s. Queen, King Crimson, AC/DC, Styx, you name it.

🔪 Danny smokes and drinks. They're bad habits, but he doesn't care too much and will get annoyed it you point that out to him.

🔪 He bites his nails and picks his skin when he's nervous or stressed.

[cloveroctobers]

can you do some headcanons on what it would be like to be Jordan and Olivia (all American)’s sister and to be a teen mom and to just be part of the whole vortex friend group? Loved ur Layla headcanons <33 Sorry this is hella specific and worded weird 😭 English is not my first language

BAKER SIBLINGS x3

A/N: glad you enjoyed them! + Your English is just fine👌🏾💜 & this ended up being a little more focused on Ada’s relationship with the twins actually and their childhood 😅 + I also was unsure how to end it, which I’m sure you’ll be able to tell once you get to the bottom lol.

WARNINGS: some possible triggering subject matters related to ED are mentioned somewhere down below. + GIF SEARCH IS ALWAYS DONE BY GOOGLE & BELONGS TO: @bakerolivia

・❥・ੈ✩‧₊˚ ・❥ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ・❥・ੈ✩‧₊˚ ・❥ ੈ✩‧

Ada Baker, also know as little Baker would be the baby sibling to the baker twins ofc.

Two years behind to be exact.

Current age as of season 5: 17/18? —Since the writers never have a consistent timeline/time frame— but it’s been brought to my attention due to the one of the episodes that Jordan is 19 so Olivia is also 19.

They’re both born in April, making them Aries babies

Two year old Jordan was not thrilled having another sister, which Laura and Billy found funny considering how close he ended up being to Ada.

Back then? They heavily got on each other’s nerves.

Ada is a cancer (born in late June) and although reserved/Stand off-ish to some, her closest friends and family know just how goofy she is just like the baker’s all can be.

She snorts when she laughs for one.

She’s also the first one to break out into dance moves with their dad Billy once he gets into his two-step routine or soul train moves, regardless of who’s watching, she loves laughing and dancing with that bald headed man.

Quiet yet sweet and temperamental all wrapped in one. First they’re sour, then they’re sweet—is definitely Ada!

The youngest sib is actually the most protective imo—she’ll throw hands for any of her sibs and will insert herself into any of their fights if need be.

Most of the time she’s open to seeing different perspectives but all hats are off when it goes to those that start shit with her big brother and sister.

Jordan and Ada are the fighters whereas Liv is more so on the verbal part, the girl is slick with her words but don’t underestimate—Liv has a mean uppercut and back hand. Have you seen those long arms?!

Was the “chubby” sibling growing up so lots of bullying was going on and kids also liked to pick on her freckles? How dumb! which resulted in fights and a few suspensions or detentions—older baker’s included.

Ada never had a reason to experience body dysmorphia (even when her own grandmother would make shady comments to Laura when they visited her for the weekend) until other kids started making it a big deal. 

She hit puberty early and the immaturity seemed to only increase due to being top heavy and not shaped so thinly like her mother or older sister.

Lots of depression, anger, wearing baggy clothing, and limiting their food intake became a thing during her middle school years and she became the first out of the family to seek therapy.

Billy didn’t think it was necessary, feeling that his daughter should just talk to him, his wife, or her siblings as the answer. It took some convincing and it wasn’t until Billy picked up on some unhealthy habits—like barely eating, purging, fainting from lack of nutrients, and seeing her constantly step on the scale three x a day, did he finally come around.

Then she took up kick-boxing which helped a lot along with her hobby of creating her own coraline inspired dolls and obsession with stop motion animation films.

She wasn’t as athletic as Jordan and she remembered being forced to attend dance classes as a kid with Liv but it ultimately wasn’t her thing.

Ofc sports were encouraged in the baker household and softball was a thing for awhile before kickboxing, “but you’re excellent at softball why would you want to give it up?” Billy asked an eight year old Ada who just shrugged her shoulders in the backseat after a game, “it’s boring daddy and I don’t want to do it anymore.” He was always softhearted for his baby girls so he didn’t pushed it but he became even more excited when Ada picked up kickboxing—not for the reason behind it though!

Ada’s kicks were insane!

“Ada, What’s the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done?” Olivia asked while the siblings decided to do a sibling tag for Liv’s Instagram.

The twins awaited Ada’s answer as she sat in between them and snorted, “probably get pregnant.”

Olivia nodded her head with her lips pushed out, lightly laughing as she returned her attention back to her phone, “Oop.”

“Well that’s all folks.” Jordan gave a two finger salute while Ada shrugged at the camera, a smirk on her lips.

It’s not like she purposely went out and got pregnant at fifteen but it was the first thing that came to mind—although there was probably a small list—she can be straight forward sometimes.

She went to Liv first with this huge secret, wanting her big sis to be there with her while she took the two tests from her Tongan boyfriend, who sneakily stole one from his older sister and bought the other.

“You better not be pranking me, Ada. This is serious.” Liv paced the floor while Ada was in the bathroom, tending to business.

“Why would I joke about this? You saw how much I was shaking when I told you.”

Liv sighed, knowing she was right. She was shocked that Ada even thought this was a possibility, eyes wide and almost gagging at the image of her sister being involved with her annoying jock boyfriend who didn’t even look sixteen.

But she also felt pride that Ada came to her first about this whole ordeal. The baker family was slowly getting better at paying more attention to each other and communicating so this actually means a lot that Ada trusted Liv with this secret.

With Liv reading the two pink lines for her and the second almost screaming: pregnant. she held onto her baby sister who fell into tears over this new change of direction her life was about to unfold.

Laura was told next before Ada’s bf at the time and Laura had the same reaction as liv: wide eyes and mouth agape before she rounded off questions: “how could you be so irresponsible? You’re only a child yourself! We’re making you an appointment first thing tomorrow morning to see how far along you are and your best options!”

Laura was just as upset as Ada but it was evident the girl was scared at the mere fact that she was having a child and that her family would probably disown her. Laura could see it in her child’s low-set damp eyes and with the way Liv was trying to be a mediator, she sighed trying to collect her thoughts, calming down.

Eventually Laura squeezed Ada to her chest, telling her that everything will be figured out and not to speak a word of it to her father until after the appointment.

Jordan found out anyways since her bf blurted it out one night when they ran into each other at this restaurant and Jordan roughed the younger boy up a bit for even “joking” about his sister like that before it was broken up.

Jordan invaded Ada’s privacy, going through her room to get some answers and when he did… he never could keep a secret—he brought it right to their father.

Billy and Jordan were heavily disappointed and said some very hurtful things that Laura immediately stepped in, her mommy bear instincts firing off at the two men in the house. “What’s the matter with you two? This is your daughter, your sister! To think what the both of you said to her was even remotely okay, tells me you don’t respect her as a person and I won’t stand for either of you speaking to her like that!”

Ada gave them both the silent treatment for a month until a sit down was demanded by Laura and Liv.

Apologies were made and life went on but that didn’t mean the wound wasn’t still there.

Ada rarely forgot much.

To be pregnant by your first love changed everything for Ada Baker. To have a bf so supportive, more supportive than her own father and brother meant a lot and she swore she was going to be with this guy forever.

Until he moved back to New Zealand, finding it selfish that her bf’s family just up and left knowing he had a child.

Which made things even harder for Ada. Juggling school—the gossip and the work load, the absence of her bf in raising their child together, simply being a teen mom was extremely hard, the change of her body after birth, she thought about old habits until she looked into the replica of her own hooded eyes that she handed down to her child, reminding Ada that she had to be better for her.

Everyday was a daily struggle but one thing is extremely true: Ada loved her daughter, dearly.

The little girl easily gained the number one spot for “best friend”

She loved having matching outfits with her and socializing with her who easily babbled back before she really learned how to speak.

Although Ada’s teenage years changed because of her daughter, she couldn’t imagine what it would be like without her vocal, smart, and active child.

It got a smidge easier as Ada’s baby got older, allowing her to spend more time with the vortex and her own set of friends. She became less needy but still adored Ada just the same.

There’s no other way to describe a child running up to you to give you the biggest hug after a long day 🥹

Attending high school, homework, work, and tending to a two year old before and after—majority of the time depending what time Ada got off. She was super thankful that Mama Laura stepped in most of the time along with the vortex. Ask her how she does it? Barely.

She gets frustrated with her child’s father since he’s not physically here to help and a FaceTime can only do so much.

I feel like the vortex wouldn’t exclude Ada as much as they got older. They’ve all been friends since childhood and she was always viewed as, “Little Bunny Baker” or simply “Little baker.”

The bunny stood for: Ada’s obsession with bunnies back when she was in elementary school.

The bakers never got into owning a cat or a dog. It was always a hamster or a fish since the family was usually always on the go.

Which resulted in Jordan accidentally k*lling Ada’s pet Bunny, leaving it outside in its cage during a heatwave in the hills while they were heading to the Grand Canyon one summer.

Ada would have done it herself and sure it was her responsibility but being rushed out of the house with a father like billy at the crack of dawn—Billy, Liv, and Ada left for the airport early to catch a morning flight since Laura couldn’t get off work until the afternoon and would be taking the evening flight with Jordan

Ada begged jordan on the phone to do it for her as they made it to the airport and Jordan said he would

Laura double checked with Jordan before they were also rushing out of the house to their car service and Jordan swore he did…

Until they came back and you can guess what was left for Ada there.

That was the last time she ever forgot to do something. Shout-out to childhood trauma!

anyways it wasn’t necessarily anything personal with the vortex, it’s just that she was a little young and they were older and they were the “cooler.” She was just kinda “weird” kid with glasses and freckles who wasn’t into what other kids were into. You know how that goes as the younger sibling…

JJ was probably the only one that didn’t make Ada feel some type of way as a kid. Always the big heart that one and Ada would be lying if she said a teeny crush wasn’t formed—back then!

Layla was sorta nice too, being Olivia’s glamorous best friend and all but Ada didn’t miss how they gossiped about her sometimes when Ada left the room—which resulted in Ada calling Liv out on it.

The screaming matches between those two growing up? It makes complete sense why Ada’s daughter has a set of strong vocal cords on her.

But hey that was all childhood stuff! As they got older, there was no need for the excluding of Ada Baker. She was just as much family as Jordan and Olivia.

If she’s down to party, she’s hitting up JJ and knows how to have a good time but knows her limit. Full on compliments from the long haired blond whenever he see’s her and he may or may not get a dance with her. “C’mon! None of that I don’t dance, crap!” “Okay, JJ! Just keep your hands where I can see them.” “Forsure! I’m a total gentleman, just ask all my lady lovers.” “This is where I leave you.” “Awww c’mon! I’m just giving a reference!”

She wasn’t the closest with asher, even when he dated Liv after Layla. She honestly didn’t approve of the relationship but Liv wasn’t trying to hear that. They actually shared some words here and there but now? They speak to each other much calmer now that he’s having a baby and is full of questions. Ada’s actually befriended Jaimee/Jaymee quite easily and Asher just wanted to get along with everyone that was cool with his gf.

Asher is the one constantly asking questions whereas Jaimee just tends to go with the flow. He’ll even text Ada at odd hours asking questions just to be hit with, “Asher, it’s midnight. Go to bed or I’ll cancel your ass again.” “Okay but before you consider doing that! What does colic mean again?” “Sorry but…Google is free.” “Who needs google when I have the real thing here?” “👋🏽” “hello?”

I’d say she’s probably closest with Jaimee and maybe Patience. They’re usually the two she’s hanging out with while the rest of the vortex maybe busy and if she isn’t dragged to hang with Jordayla (mostly by the request of Layla) and Liv or isn’t hanging out with her daughter or her own group tbh.

How does she feel about jordayla? It wasn’t much of a shock to her (or anyone) that this was a thing. Everyone knew and they failed so horribly to “hide it.”

They were all in each other’s faces like no one else was in the room at the baker’s household

“Well this is disturbing.” Ada mumbled to her mom, popping a zucchini slice in her mouth while she bounced her giggling daughter on one hip. Which earned a shush from Laura and a cackle from Liv.

Overall she may shit-talk the relationship but she’s happy that her brother found true love again after Simone and she definitely drags Jordan for proposing but is all smiles when Layla actually asks her to be a bridesmaid with a gift way down the line.

She’s a spelivia shipper, always rooting for them and she was always fond of Spencer the more he came around…kinda liking the idea that he may have biologically been a brother. Ada wouldn’t have minded another brother and Spencer seemed to become that regardless of blood and she liked how he always looked out for everyone (a gift and a curse!), especially Liv.

With Spencer came coop and just like Asher, Ada also had her ups and downs in their friendship but most of the time they got along and kinda had to since they all lived together.

Ada Baker is ultimately type 4, “the individualist,”(“Fours want to be unique and to experience deep, authentic emotions. Type Fours fear they are flawed and are overly focused on how they are different from other people”) when it comes to the vortex and basically life.

🍋 🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚🍋🐚

Continue along with my summer anthology prompts here.

[natikoko]

Agent 4 (Adrian) character sheetzzz

I’m so sorry my baby I was procrastinating doing yours for like a week I’m so sorry

Adrian. Last Name unknown. 19 years old.

- 6’1ft

- From a lanky kid to almost 250 pounds of beef and gain. Had an extreme growth spurt in his teenage years, and combined with constant agent activity, made him into the guy he is today.

- Observant and calculating. Fueled by one single-minded determination at a time, he is easily one of the most effective agents in the NSS.

- Is selfish but selfless. His selfishness can be mistaken for heartlessness, and his selflessness can be mistaken for self sabotage. Make of that what you will.

- Insecure and vulnerable during splatoon 2, where he was fourteen. Helping Marie helped him boost his confidence plenty and made him feel needed when he was lost. His relationship with Marie is strong because of it.

• he doesn’t mention his life before meeting Marie often. It’s a sore spot.

- Confident and sensible. Manages to stay calm during the most stressful of situations. Meditates in his free-time helps. He’s very reliable.

- Can be a pushover at times. He just wants to help everyone!

- Enjoys literature and music. Is studying for a degree in music theory at Inkblot art academy. Takes up many extracurriculars (but has a hard time managing his time)

- Mains rollers, specifically Carbon’s or Krak-ons. Used to use dualies plentifully, but considers himself too tall to preform the evasive maneuvers he constantly did. Prefers strenuous weapons.

• Is ranked score is very high, despite him not playing often. Is probably really rusty now.

- Gets money funneled from his parents. Has a complicated relationship with them.

- He actually didn’t meet both 3(tilly) or 8(marlon) until almost half a year after Octo Expansion occurred. He was busy with his academics and Tilly and Marlon were both recovering from the deepsea metro, so they couldn’t meet right away.

• they instantly clicked when they met. They visited each other frequently and it strengthened their relationship.

• he “amazingly brought these two bumbling idiots together because they couldn’t confess” which is a complete lie, because Adrian is horrible with romance. They wouldn’t never started a relationship if Marlon didn’t state the obvious.

• Many sleepless nights trying to understand his feelings for those two…

- Is very good at shuffling cards, for some reason. But he’s horrible at card games, so…

- Physically the strongest out of all the NSS members. Marlon is strong, but wouldn’t last long without a weapon for aid. Tilly is his strongest competitor. It’s a debate amongst the NSS.

• he and Tilly fought to settle this debate. Adrian clotheslined Tilly so hard she momentarily passed out not even three minutes into the fight and it’s obvious who won

- Doesn’t cry. It’s an unhealthy habit that he’s trying to unlearn. When he does cry, it’s messy and snotty and it’s loud and gross

- But he will NOT let his girls bottle their emotions up. He will beat those feelings out of them if he has too. If he sees any ounce of repressed trauma he’s going therapist mode

• he sees a therapist! It’s nice to just have someone to talk to, yknow?

- Is the only one in the relationship who can remotely dress well. That’s not saying much

• wears plenty of shorts and plain t-shirts. Very much is a minimalist clothes kinda guy, but that’s on par with his shitty fashion sense (me tease)

- Huge fan of Hightide Era and Ink Theory

- Animals HATE him and he does not Know Why

- Speaks very loudly. Will ask the simplest question but shout it. He’ll ask “WHATS FOR DINNER‼️‼️” without knowing he’s shouting. Cannot control the volume of him voice

- Weird eating habits. Puts Ketchup in his tuna and peanut butter on his chips but he eats a lot of good home-prepared foods so it cancels out

- Tilly called him babygirl and I don’t think he’s been the same since

- Best hugger! They’re warm and comfortable and welcoming and he always rocks you back and forth, maybe even a firm pat on the back

- A big excitable guy! Don’t be mean to him!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for accidentally causing a falling out in our friend group?

I (19) made some friends in college. One of these was J (19M). Throughout the year, small issues built up with him. Notably him constantly (albeit not maliciously) misgendering me. However, he has only known me to go by they/them pronouns since we met, so I don’t see why after nearly a year of knowing him he still couldn’t get them right.

As well as him having very aggressive body language while having conversations/arguments, which always made me very uncomfortable, but he never actually did anything, so I thought it was fine.

The turning point was one night when we were all hanging out, me and my friend M (19F) were talking about how unfair it is that guys can take their shirts off when it’s super hot outside and somehow it got to us talking about how boobs are technically secondary sexual characteristics and shouldn’t even be sexualized by society as much as they are.

J argued with us. The actual opinion on this argument is not important here nor what makes anyone the asshole, but essentially it boiled down to me saying that, if it was hot enough, I personally don’t think it should be wrong for me to be shirtless. He then told me to prove it by taking off my shirt. I said no. There were five other people in the room with us who would not consent to that and it wasn’t hot in the room.

After I explicitly said no to taking off my shirt, he doubled down. Said if I didn’t take it off my argument had no holding and that he was right, which made me uncomfortable. I didn’t feel like I needed to strip in my friend’s dorm to prove a point for a disagreement that really wasn't that serious and I didn't like that he pressured me to after I said no the first time. I can’t remember what I said in response, but the disagreement ended there thanks to the show we were all about to watch starting. However, it made me very uncomfortable for the rest of the night.

Later that night, we went out to get some food like we usually do and sat around in a circle talking. Two of my friends went up to get more food while the other three were having their own conversation which led to J and I talking. 

Now, some context: I’m autistic and I have sensory issues which make it difficult for me to eat food. There have been times when I’ve gone the whole day without eating, or maybe even multiple without, and I often stick to foods that are "safe" and won’t make me feel sick (most aren’t very nutritional/healthy).

I'm very aware of my difficulty eating and how unhealthy it is. I had been going back to my house every weekend in order to eat something other than the college food and even bought some vitamins to try and keep myself from getting severely malnourished.

That being said, I didn’t get a chance to eat much that day, and going out with them was my first genuine meal. After eating a meatball sub I got, M gave me her leftover grapes and I offhandedly said to J “I think these are the healthiest thing I’ve ate today.” 

And his response to me saying this was “You are so strange. You’re aware of how unhealthy you are, yet you never change.”

For the record, he doesn't know the specifics of my difficulties with eating. I’ve only vaguely mentioned it’s hard for me to eat and that I’m not able to eat a lot without feeling sick. Still, it felt really insensitive, very out of nowhere as we weren't having a serious conversation at all, and hurt my feelings. I got visibly upset at this and responded with a very bitter “Yeah” and immediately dropped the subject because it's not something I enjoy talking about. (This was also not the first time he has made comments about my self-care habits in such a way and while I believe he says them with good intentions I have stated multiple times it makes me feel worse).

I didn’t want to make a big deal out of nothing, so I texted my friends after we all headed back to our dorms about what happened. Both him telling me to take off my shirt and the comment on my eating and asked if I was making a big deal out of it by being uncomfortable and upset. They told me that both things were extremely rude (and that the shirt thing was technically sexual harassment, though I don’t want to call it that) and that I was justified in being uncomfortable. They then mentioned that they had their own issues with J being a little too aggressive in the past that they had brushed aside, but they felt that what happened to me justified talking to him about his behavior.

We tried our best to avoid an argument. We just wanted to have a civil conversation about it as we all genuinely care about him. But when I confronted him about my issues and H brought up the problems she had been having (which consisted of him being too aggressive, guilt tripping the others when he was told to back off, and not respecting her privacy in her dorm) he got very defensive. It escalated into an argument between H and J that escalated to H deciding to cut ties with him due to him refusing to listen.

A few hours later, J sent me and H a genuine apology, which we accepted. I thought things were fine between us, although there was lingering discomfort as there would be with most big arguments. When the semester ended he sent us all messages that he didn’t feel welcome in the group and that he thought it was better to cut ties permanently and wished us all well. 

I kind of feel like it’s my fault and that I caused unnecessary drama without meaning to.

AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[peachsayshi]

getting a little personal for a sec

(I know I have mentioned this before…) 2022 really took a toll on my mental & physical health - dealing with depression is a bit weird, and I formed a lot of unhealthy habits in that time period specifically. I’m so glad I invested in getting therapy (hopefully I can afford it again in the future) but it’s been a work in progress!

I had set goals for myself this year but the journey getting to the results has been up and down (unlearning these habits is tough! lol).

One of my goals was to lose some of the weight that I had put as a result of being depressed. I really neglected my health (like not sleeping, not moving my body, not eating well etc.) & I’ve been pretty self conscious about it, especially since most of my clothes don’t really fit me anymore 🥹 I’ve always been fairly petite, and it’s been a journey loving this version of myself.

Don’t get me wrong - I’m a firm believer that all bodies are beautiful, and I know that gaining weight isn’t anything to feel bad about or ashamed of, but sometimes my nasty, ugly thoughts try to tell me otherwise

I have an overachieving / perfectionist mindset with stuff like this, and usually when I don’t hit goals it really brings me down. But I’m letting go of the reigns and allowing myself to take it day by day. I’m just proud that I’m trying, and pushing forward! I’m working towards getting to where I would like to be mentally, emotionally and physically but I’m taking the slow journey there. Just as long as I know that I am feeling good, I know it’s a win for me!

These are the things that I am celebrating from the year so far: being more conscious about eating proper meals, getting better sleep, working through my triggers so I don’t spiral, setting boundaries (this was a big one!), laughing way more, and the wonderful people who make it all better 🥹🧡

ps: regarding weight loss - I’m not talking about losing weight to “get skinny” or for any aesthetic purposes. I’m really sensitive to this topic so please don’t make harsh comments regarding that! I would just like to get back to my average weight 💕

[paperphobe]

CW// Discussion about eating disorders, specifically restrictive ones, no real descriptions or anything unhealthy just general talk about ed accounts online. And a mention of mania/manic episode and mental illness in general.

This might be a hot take, but it’s something that I’ve seen so much online and I’m starting to see some of this In Criminal minds spaces online. 

Shitting on ed/ana accounts because they interacted with one or two of your posts is fucking weird and gross. 

I’m not saying like, don’t defend yourself if they come into your space and promote unhealthy habits or make inappropriate comments. I mean do not make an entire post just to say “ewww guys” when an ed account likes your post. 

I think a lot of people have seen a few toxic accounts and have heard stories from others about it but honestly, a lot of ed accounts stay in their own spaces especially when it comes to discussions and comments about eating disorders. If you really have that big of an issue with it then just block them as soon as it happens, there’s no need to post about it. 

I’m really tired of people dehumanizing restrictive eds. It’s gross, it’s weird and it’s not at all helpful. These are people with severe mental Illness and it’s killing them. You don’t have to support it or interact with them but publicly making posts, especially people with larger platforms, talking about how gross and awful a person is because they have an account that’s about/as a result of a severe mental health issue is not the right thing to do. 

Again I’m not defending those who go out and promote these things, but you’d be absolutely shocked at how many don’t promote this stuff. And I know it’s out there for people to access and it might cause harm to other people even if they don’t interact with anyone else at all but that’s how the internet goes, most things online have a negative effect on people. It’s unfortunate but it’s how it is. 

There’s no need to be buddy buddy with any accounts, but I’m genuinely begging people who read this to remember that it is a severe and deadly mental and physical health condition and it warps all your thoughts and actions. The best comparison I have is to think of it as one, very very long, severe manic episode. Putting them down for all your followers to see and join in on not only will not stop them from continuing their habits (if anything it often promotes it) also just causing unnecessary conflict and is just plain mean. 

Remember that they are human, they are struggling, and they probably just like your post for completely non eating disorder related reasons. And if you want to or need too, block them. 

This has been a pattern online for so long and seeing multiple posts about it in a few weeks from criminal minds accounts and in criminal minds spaces is upsetting. No one has the right to gate-keep a tv show from any group of people. Your account, sure, block them. But don’t shame people for liking/interacting with public content in a harmless manner. 

This isn’t a call out to anyone specifically and I’d love peoples thoughts/questions/feedback on this because it���s something I could talk about for a very long time. 

[dramitabhyaduvanshi]

Role of Yoga and Meditation on Heart Health

In the fast-paced, stress-ridden world we live in today, maintaining cardiovascular wellness has become more crucial than ever. As we delve into the depths of this blog, we will explore the profound benefits that yoga and meditation can offer to support and enhance your heart health. To provide expert insights, we will also mention Dr. Amitabh Yaduvanshi, a renowned cardiologist at Holy Family Hospital, whose guidance has been instrumental in unraveling the mysteries of cardiac well-being.

Understanding Cardiovascular Wellness

Before we delve into the world of yoga and meditation, let's grasp the importance of cardiovascular wellness. Our heart, the ever-beating sentinel of life, pumps blood tirelessly, supplying oxygen and nutrients to every cell in our body. However, modern lifestyles characterized by sedentary routines, unhealthy eating habits, and chronic stress have put our hearts at risk. Cardiovascular diseases, including heart attacks and strokes, are leading causes of mortality worldwide.

To combat this alarming trend, individuals are increasingly turning to holistic approaches like yoga and meditation to nurture their cardiovascular health.

The Role of Yoga

Yoga is an ancient practice that seamlessly integrates physical postures, controlled breathing, and meditation. This multifaceted approach offers numerous benefits for heart health:

1. Stress Reduction: Chronic stress is a known contributor to cardiovascular diseases. Yoga, with its focus on mindfulness and relaxation, helps reduce stress hormones like cortisol. Dr. Amitabh Yaduvanshi, a distinguished cardiologist at Holy Family Hospital, highlights that stress reduction is a cornerstone of heart health.

2. Blood Pressure Management: High blood pressure is a major risk factor for heart disease. Regular practice of yoga has been shown to lower blood pressure levels, making it an effective tool in preventing hypertension.

3. Improved Circulation: Yoga postures promote better blood circulation, ensuring that vital organs, including the heart, receive an optimal supply of oxygen and nutrients.

4. Weight Management: Maintaining a healthy weight is crucial for heart health. Yoga encourages mindful eating and can help individuals achieve and maintain a healthy body weight.

5. Enhanced Cardiac Function: Certain yoga asanas (poses) are specifically designed to strengthen the heart muscle, improving its efficiency.

Meditation's Impact on Heart Health

Meditation complements yoga perfectly in the quest for cardiovascular wellness. Here's how it contributes:

1. Stress Reduction: Like yoga, meditation reduces stress by calming the mind and promoting relaxation. It can lower heart rate and improve heart rate variability, both of which are indicators of cardiovascular health.

2. Inflammation Control: Chronic inflammation is linked to heart disease. Meditation practices have been shown to reduce markers of inflammation in the body, protecting the heart.

3. Enhanced Emotional Well-being: Negative emotions like anger, anxiety, and depression can take a toll on the heart. Meditation fosters emotional balance and resilience, reducing the impact of these emotions on cardiovascular health.

4. Blood Sugar Regulation: Meditation can help regulate blood sugar levels, a critical aspect of preventing diabetes-related heart complications.

5. Improved Sleep: Quality sleep is vital for heart health. Meditation can aid in achieving restful sleep, contributing to overall wellness.

In the journey towards cardiovascular wellness, yoga and meditation emerge as potent allies. These ancient practices offer a holistic approach to managing stress, improving circulation, and enhancing emotional well-being, all of which are crucial for maintaining a healthy heart.

As Dr. Amitabh Yaduvanshi, a respected cardiologist at Holy Family Hospital, would agree, a comprehensive strategy that includes lifestyle changes like yoga and meditation can significantly reduce the risk of heart disease and promote overall health.

Remember, it's never too late to embark on the path to cardiovascular wellness. Start today, and let yoga and meditation guide you towards a heart-healthy future.

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Questions for Problematic/Villain muses (sending u some too!) 3. What's an inherently problematic view your character holds 7. Do you ever think that despite your muses actions/morality they do have a point when it comes to their reasons? 10. Is a healthy relationship (platonic or otherwise) possible with your muse? 14. Is your muses morality compliance or does it follow a strict set of rules?

3. What's an inherently problematic view your character holds

"if it doesn't concern me, then i have no business getting involved." this is something that i've thought about a lot - ashton is selfish. very selfish. it's one of their worst traits, and i can see this line of thinking being inherently problematic because ashton has turned their back on so many horrible things.

a contractor wants me to kill this person? fine, it's not like i knew them anyways. they have a family? not my problem. despite the fact that they advocate for a much less government-controlled world, it's mostly done out of self interest rather than something they do for the greater good. they are only seeking revenge, and they are willing to rip apart potential allies if they start getting in the way of their own goal.

7. Do you ever think that despite your muses actions/morality they do have a point when it comes to their reasons?

honestly when it comes down to it, the only reasonable thing that i can think of is ashton wanting full eradication of the world nobles. nobody should hold enough power where they can freely enslave people without any kind of repercussions. given their own history with being enslaved and being forced to endure the cruelness of celestial dragons, their views are understandable at the very least.

10. Is a healthy relationship (platonic or otherwise) possible with your muse?

platonically? absolutely! when it comes to friends, ashton is nothing but supportive. they know when to draw a line and being their friend is probably one of the safest routes to go with them in terms of relationships.

when it comes to romantic or otherwise intimate relationships, that's where things get a bit... tricky.

i'm sure if it came to the right person, there's a chance that they could have a healthy relationship, but ashton has a very bad habit of borderline worshiping their lover like a personal god. any morals for them go out the window when it comes to romantic relations. oh, someone talked badly about x? i'll just kill them then. or alternatively: if x wants me to do y, i see no issues with it, no matter how immoral it might be.

it's deeply, deeply unhealthy and is probably a big reason why i don't find myself actively seeking out romantic ships. i'm not against them! but ashton has such a twisted view of intimacy that i can't imagine them being remotely healthy unless a healthy dynamic is specifically discussed with me.

14. Is your muses morality compliance or does it follow a strict set of rules?

ashton has their own set of rules when it comes to morality. i've mentioned this a few times before, but their captain (karter) regularly kidnaps and eats people, which are both pretty immoral things to do. they definitely don't like that he does these things, but these people are strangers to them, so karter can do whatever the hell he wants to them just so long as he keeps them out of it.

they do not care what other people think of them, because, hey, they're already wanted dead. nothing's gonna change that outcome, so why even bother trying to conform to social rules and laws that the government created?