#and someone suggested I do a second (sad) version

[aquastellae]

🌸 Good / Bad ending ❄️

[dovesdreaming]

౨ৎI want to wear his initial on a chain round my neck౨ৎ

Hi I hope this is good! I found getting jacks character hard and when I first imagined this it was a lot fluffier than what it turned into! But I would be happy to right a fluffier version of anyone would like that!! 1.3k words

Needs editing!!

Warnings: suggestive

Requested:@fuck-i-burnt-the-tea

Jack had never been a sentimental person. He was a pirate, they couldn’t care for anyone but themselves. Jack was widely known for that, not even having loyalties to his crew. There were very few things Jack cared about in this world. The first being his compass he kept it by his side at all times and never let it out of his sight and the second was a recent development. He had developed feelings for you. He didn’t know how it happened it went from you joking around with each other to him actually confiding in you, what was happening to him. Jack thought he could get rid of these feelings by pushing you away but the distance only made his heart want to be in your presence more. Jack didn’t understand feelings and he’d be damned if he let them get in the way of finding his recent treasure interest. There was a slight issue with this though as his compass would point in the direction of the treasure but then make a ticking motion towards wherever you were. He debated throwing you overboard or getting rid of you somehow so that he could finally get back to his pirate life yet he just couldn’t bring himself to do it.

His crew had also become attached to you, it was impossible not to. You had a way of drawing everyone and making them feel comfortable. The men aboard also didn’t mind a woman on ship but they all respected you and would protect you if needed but after they had seen you fight a rival pirate ship they decided they more than likely would never be needed.

Gibbs had noticed a change in jacks behaviour, how could he not he was the only other person than you that was close to him.

He had suspicions but never brought it up because he knew that the Jack sparrow would never admit to having feelings for someone.

Jack was always a flirtatious person and when he noticed his feelings for you develop he cranked his flirting up to the point he would flirt with a mop if it looked like a woman to rid himself of thoughts about you. He needed you out of his head and this lead him to have multiple one night stands every time the ship docked somewhere, sometimes even several a night. He thought it was working but in reality it only made him crave you more.

You had feelings for Jack sparrow before you even joined his crew. His name was whispered throughout the pirate community with many mixed comments about him. From some of the stories you had heard he sounded like just your type of man. You however ended up on his ship by accident you had been looking for a permanent crew to join and this had been the only ship accepting new crew mates. You and Jack found common ground straight away and from there you only grew closer. You never thought much of your relationship until you felt you stomach bubble with a mix of anger and sadness every night when you saw Jack take another woman to bed. Inside you knew you were jealous but you weren’t ready to admit that to yourself yet, especially when he takes a new woman every night.

One night when you and Jack were hanging out at the bar you both had a few two many drinks. Most of the words coming out of your mouths now didn’t make sense to anyone, it was just drunk babbling. Jack had been eyeing up a few women that were across the bar all night and this had deepened the feeling in your gut. You were nearly blind drunk and jealous which were not good combinations. You became touchy with Jack, reaching your hands out to touch his hair and rub his shoulders. You also stared directly into his eyes making Jack question what had gotten into you. You launched yourself at him, grabbing his face in your hands and smashing you lips into his. He hesitated before his drunk haze of want took over and he kissed you back. The kiss got deeper and deeper before he lead you away and you became another woman he took into the night with him.

You woke up in an unfamiliar bed and you looked around to see clothes strewn across the room. The vague memory of last night was at the forefront of your mind yet the face of who you left with was a blur until you turned your head to find no other than your captain. Realisation hit you like a wave and you were frozen in panic. Your mind raced with thoughts and as you saw Jack stir from his sleep all your mind could come up with was to pretend you were asleep til he left, leaving all decisions to him.

Jack awoke and collected his clothes like he did every morning after his nightly activities. It was routine at this point and he usually didn’t bother to even spare a glance to the person in bed with him. He couldn’t remember any of their faces if he tried. Yet as he was walking toward the door he stopped dead in his tracks as he recognised the article of clothing on the floor. It was your average dress yet it sparked an image in his mind and that’s when his memory flooded back. He saw images of the night before with a woman under him. The face of the woman slowly came into focus and it was you. His head snapped to the figure in bed still and sure enough he saw your face just peeking from the covers still asleep.

He panicked and ran out the door slightly slamming it in his hastily exit.

Your relationship was slightly strained from this point on both wanting the other yet feeling as though the other didn’t feel the same. Jack was also still struggling to allow himself to have feelings like this. He wanted to make a gesture to show he cared for you. He was just waiting the perfect thing to present itself to him.

He had found what he thought might do the trick. He found a necklace within the chest that the crew had been looking for the past couple of weeks. It was a chain necklace embroidered with jewels and conveniently a j engraved into it. It was like his compass had led him here all along, knowing his heart wanted to give you himself. He snatched it from the chest before anyone else saw and stuffed it into his pocket for safekeeping.

Jack had been going back and forth about giving you the necklace. He couldn’t decide whether it was too big of a gesture or too small of one. He just wanted to show you that he cared about you.

He had called you into his quarters and sat down on his desk. You were left standing in front of him, questioning why he had brought you in here. He stared at the ground before reaching into his pocket. You saw the necklace shimmer in the sunlight from the window behind, it casted spots of sunlight across the room. This made you even more confused. He twirled the necklace in his hands before speaking “this is for you”. He leant his arm out with the necklace in. You took the necklace carefully into your hands, taking every detail of it in. You heart jumped when you saw the j engraved and ran you thumb over it. You looked up to him questioningly, what did this mean? He looked away and said he wanted to show his fondness for you (jacks code word for something along the lines of love you guessed). You walked over to him and asked him to put it on for you. As he clasped his initial round your neck you didn’t feel owned by Jack, you felt he knew you. This necklace was the silent acknowledgement that you both liked one another and wanted more. It was a silent agreement that you were each others and no one else’s.

Thank you for reading! And again if anyone wants a fluffier version I have a good idea for it!!

[yuri-is-online]

I imagine Deuce!Yutu is either A. The Ultimate Honor Student with perfect grades and a plsmile that makes old nannies and mothers swoon (Yutu: "Thanks, its because me and my parent are the local "weirdos" I had to overcorrect and become a golden child (':") OR B. just as bad as pre-NRC Deuce was, a gang member who'd jump anyone who'd look at him wrong (but still cried until he was sick when he watched My Girl (1991) behind Yuu's back. They told him not to because they knew it was sad, he didn't listen).

I imagine Yuu's main memory of Deuce to their Yutu was how much Deuce believed in self-improvement and redemption, always trying to be a better man, which either version of Yutu can't help but admire or respect, despite their complicated feelings over their absent father.

Upon meeting him in the "current" timeline as a student, A or B either can't help but give Pop's an A for effort, despite missing the goal sometimes or finds him a little cringe for being such a tryhard.

I had to google the movie you mentioned and got jump scared by it taking place in Pennsylvania. Pretty sure I have driven through the place it's supposed to be set before... and fuck just reading the synopsis made me cry I don't think I could watch it ;-; poor Yutu should have listened to his parent.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, for context on the fyuuture kid au can be found here and here.

I feel like I have read too much Tokyo Revengers because... we can have both: an honor student with a delinquent mean streak sounds like a good set up for Deuce! Yutu. Not that I think he would behave like Kisaki does exactly, but still. Dylla mentions in the White Rabbit event that she wasn't on the best terms with her mother when she was a teen, and we know about how Deuce was in middle school, so the idea of Yutu having a bit of a temper and rebellious streak to him does make a degree of sense. Sadly, I think that extends to his interactions with Yuu... so things are about to be angsty on two fronts today.

Much like Deuce, Yutu was just the cutest baby. He loved all things cute and fluffy. Bunnies, kitties, puppy dogs, he was such a sweet little kid who really loved chasing around butterflies in the great outdoors. He really loved to read, and learned how to do so at a very early age. When Yuu was having a bad day he would pick out one of his favorite books and insist on reading them a bedtime story so they could take a nap without any nightmares. If he was especially worried he would bring his favorite nightlight with him.

Not that anyone would ever dare to suggest it given what Yutu is like now, but he was very afraid of the dark as a child. He still is, there's just something about the void that exists in the darkness that screams danger to him. When he's isekaid to Twisted Wonderland it evolves into an extreme fear of blot and phantoms. I'd like his unique magic to have something to do with light or stars, something inspired by the Second Star to the Right from Peter Pan? I think it would be cute for someone afraid of the dark to be able to provide their own light.

When Yutu reaches middle school there's a noticeable change in his relationship with you. He's still polite, still bringing home good grades and unoffensive comments from his teachers. But he's a bit cold, as if he is purposefully putting emotional distance between you. His friends all treat you respectfully, but you just have a feeling, left over from somewhere, that you know what is likely going on but you can't put your finger on what. He gets angry when you try to ask questions, yelling something about how you just don't understand, maybe even throws in something about this being your fault...

I wrote about Riddle! Yutu having some fights with Yuu, but Deuce! Yutu's fights are so much worse. While Riddle! Yutu typically comes out of his room blubbering big fat tears ready to apologize, Deuce! Yutu feels the need to double down and save face. He does believe his parent has amnesia, he's seen how they act, but what he does not get is why they insist on feeling so fond of his dad and refuse to move on. In his mind their life could be a lot better if Yuu was willing to be honest with themselves about who his dad probably was. Yutu is very hung up on why Deuce felt the need to be redeemed, focusing on self improvement is all fine and good if you are someone worth redeeming but he's not around for Yutu to judge. And Yuu doesn't remember...

He's young, stupid, and angry, and he takes it out on anyone who looks at him wrong. What's worse for authority figures who want to help is that he's veeeery smart about how he does it. When he jumps someone you can bet there won't be cameras around to see it. When the police start troubling Yuu about what he's doing it's mostly just in the hope that they'll be able to talk some sense into their kid rather than to arrest Yutu or anything like that, but it doesn't work. Yutu gets to see the same thing that his dad did all those years ago, his parent crying because of his behavior but there's no grandparent Yuu is asking advice of. Since I am in the mood to be extra cruel, let's say the day that fight takes place, the day Yutu sees Yuu crying is the day he hears a very important name for the first time.

Deuce. His father's name is Deuce and the reason why he wasn't around was because he was from the other world that came to swallow up him and his parent the instant they began to remember. He doesn't get time to cover up the signs of his rebellion, or really a chance to say sorry. He has to look Grandpa Crewel in the face and admit that he made Yuu cry and added to the overly stressed mess their life had become. Everything they said about Deuce was true, and what's worse he was like him.

I feel like Deuce would be the sort of person who wanted to make a lot of home videos. Cater probably would be too, but he'd store most of them on his phone and I think that would be lost to time by the time his Yutu came home. Maybe it's because of the ghost camera, or his desire to be an "honor student" evolving into wanting to be an "honorable husband and father" but Deuce totally bought a video camera to take cheesy videos to show Yutu as he grew up. Instead the kid gets to see fragments of a life he could have had as he listens to his dad tell him about his life and how he met Yuu.

"Honestly I have no idea why they said yes." Deuce is a dork. A complete dork who looks so... young and life like in the video. He knows what features he took from Yuu but watching Deuce talk, he can pick up on the ticks, the way his mouth sets when determined. The look of shock that always made Yuu laugh, it bursts into view when he hears Yuu laugh as they enter the frame to snuggle into Duece's side, to press their face against his cheek with a happily contended sigh. "Y-yuu you're making me look uncool in front of the baby."

"He's not here yet!" You giggle and for the first time in a long time Yutu feels himself choking up as he watches his dad get all silly looking at the thought of his arrival.

"We're really looking forward to meeting you kiddo. I promise, nothing will ever happen to you. I'm not going anywhere."

"Well. Technically kept that last promise didn't you." He tries to play it off like a joke, but Crewel isn't laughing and neither is Yutu.

Gets put in Heartslabyul, but isn't exactly determined to be an honor student like his dad. While Deuce enjoys a good fight or the feeling of the wind in his hair... Yutu mostly got into fights because he was angry and needed someone to take it out on. Because of that temper he struggles with learning and controlling his magic but he still does pretty well with the practical academic side of things. He's proud of his ability to understand these things, and takes a lot of comfort in knowing his dad would be excited at knowing he was good at things like math and science.

Like with the other Heartslabyul boys, he had to fight his father's phantom. He sees putting Deuce to rest as part of his penance for how he treated Yuu in the years leading up to getting isekaid. He refuses to go back in time until he's able to lay this version of his father to rest next to Yuu so he can promise both of them, to their faces, that he'll create a world where they all can be together and live as a family.

Deuce is extremely friendly to Yutu! He wants to learn as much about Yuu's world as he can so he can help them feel as at home in Twisted Wonderland as possible. He makes sure to let Yutu know that extends to him too once Yuu warms up to having him in the friend circle, Uncle Ace is much less enthusiastic but it's clearly from a place of care towards Yuu. He starts to warm up when he sees Yutu trying his hardest to tutor Deuce, though he claims it's because he just thinks it's funny but really it's because Ace wants to see Deuce succeed.

Very correct on his feelings about Pops. His dad is so wildly cringe it's unreal. His effort is inspiring until he starts getting embarrassed for losing his temper and stuttering, or seven forbid you look at his grades. The more he interacts with both of you the more certain he becomes that Deuce would never have abandoned him... and that he is so getting grounded when Deuce learns about how he treated Yuu. And what's worse is that Yutu sort of wants him to.

Surprisingly that's not what happens at all. When Deuce learns who Yutu is, whether by sleuthing or through a violent confrontation with a monster from the future, when the whole story is laid out before him and his son bows to beg for his judgement it doesn't come at all. His Pops yanks him up by the collar and turns him towards Yuu.

"Say all of that again to your parent." Deuce's voice is as stern as it is serious. Yuu looks distraught, not quite to the point they were on the day everything changed but getting there as Yutu immediately breaks down and chokes, crying and begging for your forgiveness and saying he's sorry as Deuce brings all three of you together into a strong embrace. "I'm not the one you need to make things up to, but it's ok. I know exactly how you feel and we'll work through things together."

Deuce doesn't feel like he can be overly angry at Yutu for taking after him. He does feel the need to apologize to Yuu, profusely and in private, for putting them in so much danger and not being there to help Yutu work through his temper. If I was writing this as a story, I'd make Yuu sort of afraid of Yutu's feelings? I could see them blaming themselves and things being a bit awkward within their relationship with Yutu where they had been very good before the reveal. With Deuce being the loving and understanding partner that he is, the bridge is once again mended and the whole family gets to indulge in hobbies that aren't beating the shit out of other people.

Yutu gets back into reading, and starts looking up manuals and histories of blastcycles so he has something to talk to his dad about. He was right about his dad being extremely proud of him for being smart, he's that classic mechanic working class dad who can't stop talking about his kid who went to college and has pictures of him in his garage he makes sure to point out to everyone who comes in. Said person is really just Ace who really wants to make fun of Deuce and Yuu for being cringe together but is too focused on this whole world ending thing and wants everyone to be more focused on that.

Deuce promises that he is, he has a lot of confidence in the ability of your little group to be able to win against stacked odds. You've done it before you can do it again. Yutu couldn't have picked better allies, he's really determined to show him that and be a dad his son can be proud of. He repeats his promise to Yutu that he's never going anywhere, even though the kid never told him anything about the tapes because he really means it. He wants that world little Yutu dreamed of and older Yutu swore to fight for to be a reality, and it's his job as an honorable dad and future husband (he gets so flustered when he says that) to be the one on the front lines of fighting for it,

... just please please please do not tell Yutu about the egg incident. He doesn't think he could handle that embarrassment.

[animehideout]

LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE OF THEM ALL

PART 10

Gojo Satoru x Fem! Reader

check out part 11 here ✨🆕

W.c: 3.4K+

not proofread ⚠️

a/n : Hi everyone, I'm back with another part yaaay, I hope you enjoy it. I need a good cry so I wrote this, where are my Angst enthusiasts at? this part is for you, but no worries I'll make it up for you I promise 😭🩵.

Music Suggestion 🎧 I highly recommend The Neighborhood - Softcore to match the sadness 🥲

You gradually regained your consciousness; you felt a dull throb in your head. You blinked slowly, struggling to focus, your surroundings initially a blur of shapes and colors that gradually sharpened into clarity.

You tried to move, to rub your temples but your heart beats quickened when you realized you were bound to a chair, your limbs securely tied with coarse ropes. Panic surged through your veins, your eyes widening as you struggled against your restrains, each tug to break free was met with resistance. Ropes tightly wrapped around your wrists and legs, a burning sensation, only serving to deepen your sense of helplessness.

“Fuck, fuck” you muttered.

Breathing heavily, your chest rising and falling in wild rhythm. You scanned the dimly lit room, searching for any sign of escape. But there was none, and you found yourself trapped in a nightmare worse than your reality.

Suddenly, a deep voice cut through the silence, coming from behind. A tone that sent shivers down your spine,

“No need to struggle princess”

The words dripped with menace. You were too scared to look behind not knowing what to face. You bit your lips that were quivering. From the shadow, he emerged. With hesitation you looked up to see the tall figure that concealed the dim light from you. His muscles taut beneath his shirt, a sly, dirty smirk tugged at the corners of his scarred lips. His dark black hair fell on his face gracefully, looking directly at your soul with his narrowed eyes. for a split second, you thought it was a more aggressive version of Megumi.

His presence, the way he stood in front of you, looking down at you sent a chill to your whole nervous system, making your breath hitch up.

“W-who are you? What am I doing here?”

He reached to grab your chin with his long fingers, forcing your head up to look at him.

“Shh-hh, don’t ask questions! Lemme introduce myself first” he paused, bringing another chair and sat right in front of you. “I’m sure you’ve heard about me…they probably warned you, I’m-”

“You’re Toji Zenin?!” you interrupted him

With a mocking tone, he leaned forward and said,

“I go by Fushiguro now! So don’t say Zenin ever again…so? Did you sleep well”

You stayed frozen in place, each inhale felt like shards of glass scraping down your throat. Consumed by fear, realizing that the man who’s been searching for you all around Tokyo, just to take your life away finally found you and was comfortably sitting in front of you. Your world narrowed, maybe it’s the end.

*flash back*

With a heavy weight in your heart, you left Jujutsu High in the dread of the night. Spending the night stargazing in the balcony wasn’t enough; you wanted to get completely detached so you left for some fresh air away, far away from Gojo.  The echo of what Gojo said to you still ringing in your ears. “you failed your family and now you’re failing everyone else in Jujutsu High” those words never left your mind.

“He’s right..I even failed myself” you muttered to yourself.

You walked through the streets, each step was a painful reminder that you’ve got nowhere to go, completely lost, nowhere and no one to turn to, feeling that you don’t belong anywhere. The darkness of the night enveloped you like a cloak. Your feet carried you to an unexpected place, standing in front of the big wooden door, you didn’t dare to knock, you just stood there in front of your parent’s house, memories flooding your mind. Maybe your parents were right for keeping you locked inside. Maybe someone like you was never meant to leave the safety of their house, maybe your parents knew that you would get hurt. But your family, who spent their life keeping you in the darkness of your room pushed you to marry a stranger, a man you never knew, never met; Gojo Satoru, just because of his good reputation, because he’s the strongest, maybe your parents thought he would keep you safe and will protect you, but he ended up slit opening a deep wound within you, once again awakening your trauma that you worked hard to learn how to live with.

“I was only a burden to everyone” you said to yourself,

You heard giggles so you stepped closer, peeking through the window. Your heart sank as you saw your family again, after so long. You didn’t know whether to feel happy or sad at their sight. Your parents and siblings, gathered together in the warm glow of the light. Carefree and content, laugher filling the air, a bittersweet melody to your ears. Their faces illuminated by smiles as they talked together.

You stood there, a silent observer on the outside looking in. A tear rolled down your cheek , a broken smile drawn on your face,

“They look happy without me”

You felt a sting in your chest,  loneliness washing over you again and again, it actually never left, loneliness was the only companion you had. It was as if you were peering into a world you had once knew, yet now felt completely disconnected.

History repeating itself, once again your family managed to make you feel like an outsider, a complete stranger. You felt as if you were a completely forgotten fragment of their life, a faded memory lost in the depth of time, as if you never been a part of their past.

Tears welled in your eyes as you turned away from the window, unable to bear the ache of being invisible to them your whole life. As you turned, you were met with a pair of glowing eyes looking directly at you, a tall masked figure that made you gasp , but before you could react, you got hit on your head with a metal bar…falling unconscious.

*End of flashback*

“Was that your parents house?” asked Toji

But you completely ignored his question, looking away from his intense gaze,

“What do you want from me?”

“Kill you, obviously… now answer my question..Was that your parents’ house?”

“Why does it matter to you?”

“As you can see, I feed on other’s suffering .. so it would be nice to learn more about your miserable past”

You frowned your brows in confusion,

“I had a normal, not miserable past" you lied, keeping your traumas to yourself,

“Oh hoho, let me guess, abused? Discriminated? No no ignored? That’s the right word… no one ever recognized you right? No one made you feel welcomed cuz you were different and people are scared of things that are different” he started

How did he know that? How did he know about your past? How could he describe what you've felt so accurately?

“N-no!” you lied again

“Come on don’t lie to me.. I know very well the face of someone who’s been discriminated their entire life for being  different”

“Have you met someone like that to judge so confidently?”

“No, but I look in the mirror everyday”

You looked at him in disbelief, you didn’t dare to say a word. Whatever he was trying to do, was successfully making you feel uncomfortable. Is he trying to torture you before taking your last breath away? But you already gave up, there’s no way you can escape this place, tied hands and legs, him sitting right across you., and probably no one would look for you.

“If you’re gonna kill me then do it already, and spare me from talking about the past”

“Woah, so you give up already? Who pushed you to your limits to the point that you greet death as an old friend?” he asked

“No one, just do it. This is what you captured me for.. SO DO IT” you yelled.

“Hm, interesting! I think I know where all of this is coming from..Gojo Satoru? Did your husband add to your trauma?”

“enough” you whispered weakly

“What? It must be hard to live with him; especially that he’s the strongest. Lemme guess! He made you feel weak at any given chance, reminding you again and again that you’re nothing” he said offensively pushing you to your edge.

“St-op”

“That’s what sorcerers do, they claim they protect the normal, oh I’m sorry the monkeys like us, but in reality they use their power to belittle us…and you’ll soon be like them, soon you’ll turn into your real form; a sorcerer with an immaculate power but ugly usage..and this is my chance to spare the world of the normal from your ugliness”

“What are you talking about? I’m no turning into a sorcerer-”

“What?”

“It’s been weeks and nothing happened, that prophecy they talked about was nothing but a big lie”

“But your curse-”

“Fate is my only curse” you said, your eyes blankly staring at him, completely worn out.

*Back at Jujutsu High*

Satoru’s eyes blazed with fury as he walked towards Mei Mei and grabbed her by the arm, his grip tight and violent. He yanked her aside aggressively,

“You! You’re the reason she’s gone” he spat with anger.

Mei Mei’s face etched with annoyance, narrowing her eyes at him,

“Don’t you dare blame me for this! It’s  your fault Gojo not mine” she fought back.

“You did that on purpose didn’t you? Leading me to your room cuz you know Y/n will be there, you’re trying your best to have me, but you can’t and you never will” he spoke through gritted teeth.

“You started this in the first place. You asked for my help to push Y/n away, and when I succeeded in giving you what you wanted, you started blaming me? Is this your way to say thank you?”

“I already told you to stop, I said that I no longer in need of your help that you got paid for, but you kept pushing, you wanted more than pushing Y/n away, you wanted me to be yours, but too bad for you, I don’t want you Mei Mei _ and if something happens to y/n I’ll end you! Do you understand ?” he threatened and turned his back to leave.

“Do you love her?” asked Mei Mei making Gojo stop in his track. “There’s only explanation for this, you fell for her Gojo: you fell for Y/n!”

A moment of silence washed over the place, making a hundred of thoughts flow in Gojo’s head. But he ignored her; he doesn’t have time to think about his feelings, when the one he has feelings for is missing because of him. So he started walking away to join the others and start their mission to find you.

…..

“We’ll split into three groups and cover as much ground as possible” suggested Gojo and all of them nodded in agreement.

“Megumi and Maki come with me” he added

“I’ll take Yuji-kun  and Panda” said Nanami

“Inumaki and Nobara you’ll go with principal Yaga” ordered Satoru

“What about Mei Mei, where is she? Isn’t she coming with us to look for Y/n-sensei?” asked Maki with suspicion, she never liked her anyway.

“I’ll go with you” said Mei Mei as she joined them in the common room, “Let’s find y/n”

Satoru ignored her presence and left the room, the rest of them walked outside. Spreading across Tokyo streets, searching everywhere for a glimpse of you. Ready for any possible encounter with Toji Zenin.

Satoru walked with powerful step, determined to find Toji’s hideout and save you from his deadly grasp.

“We’ll find her..don’t worry Y/n is strong, she can definitely handle it” said Megumi in a comforting tone, after noticing how stressed Satoru was.

“I know… she’s strong” he finally admitted.

Hours stretched on into the night, Gojo and the other sorcerers students and teachers combed through each and every corner of the city.. every alleyway, every secluded spot that Toji could possibly use desperate to find her, but for nothing.

Despite their exhaustive efforts, the outcome remained unchanged; you’re nowhere to be found.

With heavy hearts and weary bodies they got back to Jujutsu High as principal Yaga called off the search.

*2 days later*

“The higher ups called for an urgent meeting” said Principal Yaga

“We’ll join the meeting!” said Yuji

“No it’s only for the teachers”

“NO! we care for Y/n-sensei, and maybe more than all of you! If this is about Y/n-sensei then we’re joining” said Yuji with a sad tone

With a sigh, principal Yaga nodded, guiding all of them to the meeting room.

*At the meeting room*

Tension hung in the air, faces drawn and expressions grim as they waited for one of the higher ups to speak,

“Any clue? Any hint? Any progress?” asked one of them.

All of them shook their heads in defeat, their silence spoke volumes, conveying their helplessness and the frustration of their failure.

“We expected nothing less from Toji Zenin, it’s already crystal clear-” he added coldly, his words cutting through the silence once again.

“We won’t give up! We’ll go back tomorrow and this time we bring her home and bring Toji to his trial again” said Gojo in fraustartion, his words dripping with venom.

“You’ve been looking for two days but for vain, there’s no point in wasting any more time and effort, once she’s captured by Toji we knew she’s already gone, she’s already dead” said one of the higher ups.

“SHE’S NOT DEAD” yelled Satoru slamming his fist on the wooden table,

all heads turned at his direction at his sudden rage.

“I know it’s hard to swallow, but it’s your fault for letting her wander outside without keeping an eye on her, it’s your fa-”

“YOU THINK IM NOT AWARE OF IT? YES YOU’RE RIGHT IT’S MY FUCKING FAULT FOR LETTING HER GO, IT’S MY FAULT FOR PUSHING HER AWAY FROM ME, IT’S MY DAMN FAULT MY HURTING HER SO MUCH TO THE POINT THAT SHE FAVORED FACING DANGER OUTSIDE THEN STAYING BESIDE ME…stop blaming me because I know, I messed up, I fucked up and I admit it…but you can’t ask me to give up on my wife-” said Gojo his voice cracking.

Without further words, he left the room. Nanami followed him trying to help him,

“Gojo stop…hey stop” said Nanami “Where are you going?”

“To find her”

“Gojo you know you won’t find her…” said Nanami apologetically

“You once told me to treat her as a real wife, so here I am doing , let me for once care for her like a real wife”

“Gojo don’t do this to yourself, I know you still have hope, we all do but the higher ups won’t allow it”

“Well fuck them the higher ups..I won’t rest till I bring my wife home”

“Alright I’ll come with you”

*At Toji Zenin’s hideout*

“Wakey wakey…” said Toji splashing cold water on your head

You gasped for air, completely startled, completely drenched

“W-what the hell!!” you exclaimed

“Someone wants to meet you”

Confusion clouded your thoughts as you glanced towards the door in anticipation. Who could possibly come to meet you? Is there someone else in the dirty game that Toji is playing?

Your heart skipped a beat as the door creaked open, revealing a familiar silhouette that slowly emerged from the shadow to the light.

“M-Mei Mei?” you said in shock

Your mind raced trying to make sense of the whole situation, your eyes didn’t leave hers as she looked down at you. But the smirk on Mei Mei’s face offered no answer,

“I hope you had fun these two days here with Toji”  

“W-what?” your voice almost inaudible.

“Did you think I’d let you win huh? Poor Y/n!”

“You!- you did all of this? What’s your problem with me huh?” you asked your voice trembling with anger.

“The thing is, you are the problem Y/n! I won’t let you have Gojo, I won’t let you turn into a sorcerer and become the strongest..I won’t let that prophecy come true”

“You’re insane!” you shook your head in disbelief

“Well call it whatever you like, but I won’t let you steal my dreams away”

“So you think that stealing my life away is the right thing to do?”

“YES YES” she leaned forward “I can’t bear to see Gojo look at you with much love in his eyes, I can’t bear to see him giving his heart to you-”

“What are you blabbering about? You know well what kind of relationship I have with Gojo, I already know that both of you have an affair”

Suddenly she started laughing hysterically,

“That’s what I wanted but that dick didn’t want me and never did, since you’re going to die so yeah lemme tell you truth, I got paid to do what I’ve done, he never touched me…it was all lie, all of them, I made that up to push you out of the frame, he wanted that at first but then he started to push ME out of the frame, maybe he’s got a liking into you, a liking that I didn’t like, when I noticed the way his heart started to beat for you, when a spark was born I had to intervene, I couldn’t help but release Toji out of prison, pay him a big amount of money  to abduct you and kill you”

“I’ve never thought you’ll get to this level of low” you spat

“Now you’re out of the frame, I succeeded, you’ll die.. Toji will kill you and I’ll work on making Gojo forget about you, I’ll comfort him when he mourns your death, I’ll be the shoulder he cries on and that’s how I’ll win his heart…to the higher ups you’re already considered dead and shortly you’ll truly be” she said happily, playing with her hair

Disbelief washed over you like a tidal wave, leaving you disoriented. You struggled to voice your thoughts, lost in the overwhelming emotions so you started screaming at her,

“I’LL KILL YOU MEI MEI, I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU”

You struggled to break free from the ties that restricted your movement to a minimum, completely going crazy, you hair falling on your face. With each tug and desperate lurch you felt your anger growing more and more, your heart hammering against your chest, redoubling your efforts, till you crashed on the ground, the chair toppled over with a resounding thud, hitting your head on the hard concrete. You laid there, disoriented and dazed, pain pulsed through your skull, world spinning around you. If you managed to break free you’ll make Mei Mei vanish from existence.

You saw in slow mo how Mei Mei was walking towards the door leaving the room, Toji crouched down, brushing strands of hair off your face, placing it behind your ear,

“It’s okay, it won’t be painful…but before I kill you, I’ll do terrible thing to you that will make you beg me to kill you”

You were too weak to answer him, you can feel yourself fading into the background, into the nothingness…losing touch  with what’s real. As you closed your eyes, seeking solace in the silence. His face emerged, Gojo’s features etched in your mind with crystalline clarity. Amidst the chaos, the threat, you were somehow happy and relieved that he did not cheat on you, that hadn’t touched Mei Mei  and that all what she said before was a lie to offend you that’s all. A smile tugged at the corners of your lips, with each passing moment, your thoughts dived deeper and deeper in the memories shared between both of you, the closeness of your faces when both of you bickered, the way he was sleeping  next you but disturbed by his night terrors, you wished that you be there for him, comfort him and put him back to sleep in your arms, maybe you’ll be his dream and replace that ugly nightmare that haunts him every night. Maybe you can try again and be a real husband and wife.

You realized in that moment that you needed him, that you have already fell for him but that feeling needed something to be noticed, and this something is being far away from him. But is there a way back? A tear run on your cheek, a weak smile drawn on your tired face, fate is indeed your curse.

“It’s too late…I’m already gone”

With that you closed your eyes, drifting to sleep, your dream filled with visions of Gojo is your only companion.  

….

“Are you sure about this Maki?” asked Nobara

“I don’t know, but she’s been acting really suspicious, maybe we can find something?”

“You sure we won’t get caught?”

“No…but I’ll do it, if you’re not sure about this you can go I’ll handle it alone!”

“No I’ll be here, I’ll guard the place”

Both of them walked through the dark corridor like ghosts, gently turning the door knob, sneaking into Mei Mei’s room.

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[p3sephone]

My baby. (Dark! Ex! Wanda Maximoff x reader)

Prologue

Summary: you are Wanda's ex and you broke up with her a long time ago. Then Wanda decides it's a good idea to become your neighbor and take her baby back, one way or another.

Warnings: this is a dark! Serie about Wanda Maximoff that will contain dark themes such as violence, breaking in, non-con and similar stuff in the future chapters. Every chapter will have its own warnings to be safe. This is pure fiction and this character does not belong to me. Minors are NOT allowed, only +18. Any kind of interactions such as reblogs, comments or likes are much welcome and appreciated. 🤎

Prologue warnings: breaking inside, little use of magic.

"I'm home!" you exclaimed with a smile on your face, closing the door behind you. You were happy to be back, you had a wonderful surprise for your roommate. You were sure that she hadn't suspected anything, after all you hadn't mentioned anything in these weeks and you knew how difficult it was. You had lost count of how many gifts and surprises you had ruined because you often spoke before thinking out of excitement.

But this time you didn't think, as you walked briskly towards the living room. The lights were on, she was surely sitting there on the couch watching some movie. You were already anticipating the scene. Your smile quickly dropped as the gift bag slipped from your hand and fell to the floor. The personalized mug inside had surely broken into a thousand pieces, but that was now the least of your problems.

Your roommate was lying there, apparently asleep, but you knew that wasn't the case. Not when Wanda was sitting on the other side of the couch with her arms crossed, then looking straight into your eyes. She had a small smile on her face, sly and arrogant you would say, but you could see all the hatred hidden behind her eyes. You were together, as teenagers, a long time ago. Wanda had lost everything, you too: you had regained everything and left Wanda behind, and Wanda had lost what was left of her, left with total nothingness. Considering that you had left her too. Or at least, that was what Wanda thought; in reality, your version would have been very different from hers, but you weren't really sure she wanted to hear it and even less that she was interested. "What are you doing in my house?" your own cold tone surprised you. It was as if someone else was talking to you and you didn't know how your knees could still hold up. But Wanda wasn't stupid, she could feel how your heart was beating like crazy, this still allowed her to act arrogant. She stood up from your couch and walked over to your boyfriend’s sleeping form, approaching you and freely ignoring your question.

“Is this your house? Our apartment was better.” It was a suggestion, obviously. It wasn’t the first time Wanda had tried to make you change your mind and tell you that the two of you were meant to be together, and at first you believed it. The first, the second and even the third time. Then you finally realized that she would tell you anything and lie shamelessly just to have you back by her side and reduce you to an object again.

You had loved that woman, but it was over. And she had to understand that.

“No, this house is better, with my roommate who I sincerely hope will wake up soon.” You made a suggestion and she immediately took it, laughing in your face.

“She’ll be fine, I just put her to sleep... I wanted to be alone with you, I missed you.” she said playing with your hair, and you could almost see the sincerity in her now slightly sad face. But you couldn't fall for it again and you had certainly been through too much because of her.

"But I haven't missed you, Wanda. Get out of my house."

You had caught her attention now, her fingers slowly stopped playing with your hair finally letting it go. Now you saw the real Wanda. Her hateful gaze with a red aura was intensely scrutinizing you and you swore they could see much more than your eyes or your face. Her eyes immediately became clear again and Wanda gave you a sweet smile, waving her right hand and using her magic. You remembered what that magic had done to you, you still had the scars.

"I can also go out, after all we will see each other every day. It's a pleasure to meet you again, neighbor!" she teased you giggling, then walking out of your door without you even accompanying her. You stood there in shock, standing numb in the doorway to the living room, watching the front door close and then the couch, where your roommate was now starting to wake up.

The nightmare had begun again.

[r95irth]

Do you know those posters to help your mental health? Someone shared one with a small racoon and my brain went "we can make a 3zun version of this" but in the end i made a Lan Xichen - Jin Guangyao, xiyao version, an implied Wangxian, Twin jade feels, and a Nie bros feels.

Anyways give JGY time to sleep and NMJ something to munch over and also LWJ a hug (don't worry LWJ you'll get your crush back one day)

The last panel really gave me trouble,

at first i wanted to draw LXC in his seclusion time, but someone pointed out that LXC never stinks...And also it broke my heart to give him his canon ending and i had no idea how to make a shower look better (he would just be drowning under the water...)

Then next i wanted to draw Wangxian, with WWX being the one who hated himself and LWJ washing him in the second one...But WWX is (hopefully) not hating himself anymore at the end of canon and i didn't want to make put some sadness in his happy ending (because even if i don't speak much about wangxian lately i do like them a lot x))

Finally I went for Twin jade feels thanks to suggestions and i don't regret it. I liked drawing LWJ popping bubbles underwater while his brother comb his hair. (Besides it's hopeful as he will get his crush back, eventually, we all know this...)

anyways. If you feel like everyone hates you, like A-Yao, sleep.

If you feel like you hate everyone, like Nie Mingjue, eat.

And if you hate yourself, get a shower.

(Might look for therapy too, if the shower is not enough...)

Have a nice evening :)

[rubra-wav]

[ Entry #10 ] What it would be like actually dating Vox hcs

A/N I love Vox, but the reality of it is that he'd be terrible for a lot of reasons and I'm not gonna sugarcoat it in here like at all.

Me when theoretically very complex but ultimately still extremely problematic character: *foaming at mouth*

I love him.. but God I also hate him... but I also love hi-

This is a long one jfc.

Cw: Nsfw - no smut but strong themes, discussion of toxic relationships, manipulation, discussion of emotionally abusive/controlling behaviour, insecure aa toxic cis man behaviour, suggestive at one point

Someone asked me what I thought he'd be like with a yes-man reader so here it is

The worst out of the way first

The thing about Vox is that he's got a fuckton of baggage and bad traits that need desperate management, and they would sure as hell not be being managed by him on his own choice.

As his partner, you would NOT be able to be a pushover or shy away from any kind of confrontation about actions that have upset you because if Vox had a partner like this? He'd become the absolute worst version of himself in your relationship because you would not be calling him out or enforcing boundaries with him.

- He's insecure, and it's in the worst way possible.

And not in the 'aw he just needs to be loved and then he'll be healed' way. I'm talking in the 'toxic, refuses to remedy his own behaviours, becomes very emotionally abusive abt it if you don't pull up your boots and confront him abt it and make sure he actually does shit about it' way.

The fanfic community likes to portray him as a victim in the relationship with Val, and while it's true Val is certainly worse for obvious/overt reasons - He's still not just a victim in that situation. He's also terrible.

Just for reasons that are less overt and are thus overshadowed a lot. Acknowledging that doesn't make the shit Val (at least seemingly thus far. Vox side-stepped the drink being thrown pretty fast and seems accustomed to violent tantrums) does to him any less terrible, it's just the truth he's not a poor defenceless victim in that. (Vox literally goes to try use his mind control power on Val the second he seems like he's gonna damage their image then throws his lowest earners under the bus.)

- In the beginning if you aren't giving him attention at all times, do something that reminds him of Valentino even slightly, or if you do something that he just mildly doesn't like; then he will be passive aggressive or straight up aggressive as absolute fucking hell.

The second he feels slighted even a little bit, he's going to be so pissy.

- And he can't communicate for absolute shit. He thinks you are doing shit on purpose to piss him off or hurt him. This is due to his relationship with Val, but it's not him being a sad sob story kind of thing (not all around at least), he will be awful to you if you allow him to ever be just a victim who can do no wrong.

- He will project all his bs heavily onto you in the beginning with complete self awareness and no thought given to managing his own shit.

If you ask what's wrong when he's acting up he probably would be the type of bitch to go 'nothing's wrong' and will then proceed to ruminate upon it until he ends up exploding about it later on. Or, maybe he'll even do the 'you know what you've done' type of shit.

- He would probably expect you to be a mind reader and when you inevitably aren't aware of wtf is happening because he hates being emotionally vulnerable at all and can't describe what's going on properly for himself, he will be an absolute bitch about it. (Carried here from my other hc that he has a bunch of self-imposed toxic masculinity he needs to deconstruct)

- If you call him out, he will likely try to convince you he's not doing it.

- He'll become increasingly more self-aware of his behaviour you are aware of and will just be even worse because he hates that you could see something about him he doesn't want you to see.

Basically, he feels embarrassed as fuck about it, and cannot apologise because that's humiliating as all hell to him, so instead of turning inwards and dealing with his crap he then proceeds to consciously project shit onto you even when he knows he's in the wrong.

He'd rather argue the wrong point and behaviour than admit he's capable of making mistakes.

He will probably also try to hypnotise you into forgetting anything he thinks is undesirable you know about him too.

- You will need to actually teach him real consequences for his actions, but also need to be assuring him that you aren't going to do shit like Val would have or leave him for someone else and shit like that simultaneously.

He needs to essentially be taught consequences, boundaries, healthy relationship behaviour, etc. From absolute scratch. I would literally pay for this cunts therapy atp istg.

- And this is gonna be an absolute fucking nightmare because again, he doesn't want to admit that he doesn't know what the fuck he's doing and that he's in the wrong. All that interferes with his image he wants to put out at all times in your relationship with him.

He's got masks on masks. Even one for your relationship. The second that cracks in any regard, he's gonna be rushing to compensate for that, and if that doesn't work, he's gonna be pissed and most likely end up pushing that onto you.

- Speaking of image. I mentioned this in a fic, but he'd most likely be extremely controlling over your freedom to disclose your relationship, too. If he thought you would look poor as a partner for his reputation (ie. Low status, bad reputation), he'd most likely never want to publicly reveal your relationship no matter how much he loves you - he'd likely hide this completely behind you having privacy but if you say you want people to know anyway he's going to slowly become more and more overtly pissy about it.

And, if you are openly known to be in a relationship, he will be wanting to control your own image as well.

If you step one foot out of line of what he deems perfect, good lord he will be an absolute nightmare.

- Also mentioned in another post, but he would absolutely also watch you through cameras you don't know are there. Same as what he's seen doing with Val.

- He's got practically zero qualms in the beginning of your relationship with violating your privacy or boundaries if he thinks he'll get away with it/that you won't find out about it. This also likely goes for things like checking your texts, calls, and search history without permission.

- The possibility that he'd try to interfere with your personal relationships if he thought they would try drag you away from him or if they take up a lot of your attention is also pretty present.

He's an incredibly jealous person (as seen by him seeming jealous of Angel with Val of all people), so the second he sees you giving someone else positive attention? He's gonna be fucking furious.

- Again, you could not be a pushover in your relationship with him because he'd be absolutely awful. You'd have to basically be reality checking him every three seconds - it's NOT for the faint of heart and even if you're incredibly patient you will probably be going insane from it at points.

Implying you can actually get him to change tho he would become a lot better - he's gonna be fighting you on practically everything because the second he feels out of control of a situation or himself he's gonna be freaking out.

He will probably be straight up terrified if it seems like you are making him 'change', even if it's for the better and will ultimately ALSO benefit him too.

The SECOND he feels out of control of a situation in any way, he will be terrible.

- Also, if you manage to push him on the path to behaviour management this cunt will be looking smug and proud of himself as all hell the second he even slightly does what you ask and will be a bitch if you don't rain down praise on him for it. 💀

- He's so positive attention motivated it's actually pathetic lmao

With that out of the way - the slightly better/good other stuff

- Vox works fucking nightmare hours with his position in hell, and he hates not being able to be around you much so he's almost always trying to make it up to you.

- He'll be on calls with you or texting you most hours of the day (even when he probably should not be) because he's honestly clingy as hell.

If you don't like having a million notifications from someone blowing up your phone with random shit then you are not going to like being apart from him because he is chronically on his phone.

- Another thing is the gifts.

If you want a sugar daddy aa boyfriend? This is the man for you because my God will he shower you with the most expensive gifts you have ever received. New phones, cars, jewellery, clothes, so on so on.

It's bad if you don't like consumerism and want to keep devices even if newer ones come out because the second something new comes out he's getting it for you - even before it becomes publicly available to the rest of hell, it's in your hands. He wants the best stuff and only the best stuff for you. How would that make him look if his partner didn't have all the best stuff? To you and also others

- Also, the second you mention you actually want or need something? It's there right in front of you. Bro has personal delivery drones, and it will be there in under 15 minutes delivered to you or someone's getting shot.

- I've seen a few people imply gift giving is his primary love language, and it's certainly up there, but I personally think that it's more likely acts of service.

This man never does anything for anyone unless it's to keep things from being annoying to him, self gain, or damaging his image. So for him to do things for you that he knows you want from him even if he doesnt particularly want to? He is well and truly in love with you, and that would be how he'd let you know that even if he isn't self-aware of it, lmao.

He doesn't like being told to do things, but he's really good at picking up on what people want usually (unless he's being delulu) so if he notices something or you mention stuff off-hand? He'll try to do it/get it/whatever it is for you.

Material things are just material things. He's rich, it doesn't mean that much to drop thousands for him. Him actually doing things for you, though? Even if it doesn't benefit him at all? That's something else entirely.

Will be annoying asf if you don't thank him enough for it, though. Ie. "Well, you're welcome then." While pouting at you.

- As for spending time with him:

I believe he constantly wants to be alone with you and only with you when he actually has time to do so, so he only wants dates to be one-on-ond most of the time.

There aren't exactly limits upon that, though, like at all.

He's absolutely rich and has ridiculous privileges so you could be on comfy home dates where you two just stay in and cuddle after eating dinner, or seeing concerts/watching movies/etc exclusively where they are not available to just anyone, or something fucking ridiculous like eating a fancy dinner at a custom designed restaurant just for dates under a goddamn aquarium (very likely ngl)

The second he gets to show off his power, he's gonna do it with a smug grin.

- He's also extremely big on physical touch but would never admit it. I already go over this in another entry, but he's gonna have a hand on you at all times (hand on your waist, hip or shoulder, purposely brushing against you more then he logically has to be, etc)

Brief mentions of sexual stuff here

I feel like he'd love someone big on physical touch - both in a sexual way but also especially in a non-sexual way.

He's not used to getting someone cuddling him or holding his hands or literally just touching him at all without some underlying ulterior motive, so he'd probably just melt into your touch.

Also I'll link the post bc there's further takes on this in it but they are ✨️sus✨️

- He would be extremely protective of you- this can absolutely become one of the blue sections really easily- but if you're in a relationship he's gonna be constantly concerned about your safety and whether you are at risk.

I mean, you're in hell. Just about anyone could turn out to be some maniac (ironic he would think that 🤨)

Anyways, point is, you'd be safe from any other maniacs. He would give you the best security and protection probably in hell.

Another thing is that he's gonna be super paranoid at all times about whether you're safe or not. Which would probably get honestly annoying rather than endearing at a point. 💀

- Even though he's really against revealing his more vulnerable parts and what he doesn't think are desirable of himself, he's absolutely craving emotional security with someone.

So when you get him passed that? He's gonna be so goddamn clingy - even more then before lmao.

Ending note

He's an absolute nightmare who's high maintenance asf and could become extremely abusive emotionally, but he really also needs to be romanced properly for that to actually get better by a partner who won't take his bs and knows how to take him down a peg and put him in his place when he's being awful.

And definitely therapy.

The fact that I think all this and know how much an awful person he is and still love him this much as a character has gotta indicate some sort of insanity/j

[ Masterlist ]

[incandescentflower]

The Double had made me nervous for a few seconds - they briefly made me think they had built up this big revenge story and then would have the final moments be more about the political aspects happening around Xue Fangfei and leave her to passively ride it out.

But no! they did not.

I really appreciated she got to be active in the resolution until the very end and honestly for me, the more dramatic, the better.

She never falters, relying mostly on herself (and the help she seeks) to find ways to finally put an end to the insanity that is her relationship with her husband. I found the resolution very satisfying. He was definitely one of the more interesting villains - constantly justifying his actions in the most twisted ways. Honestly not even a fantastical version of domestic violence. Just straight up how some men treat women.

I hate him so much.

Xiao Heng is absolutely my favorite type of cdrama male lead - smart, respectful, doesn't try to swoop in or interfere with Xue Fangfei's plans, but does come to help her when she needs it, is definitely very much attracted to her intelligence and resilience, and once he knows how he feels he is down bad and does not hide his feelings. Even when he gets upset with her putting herself in danger, he doesn't direct anger at her, but does communicate his fears.

A+++ romance.

I also liked that A-Li and Duke Su were equals in every way possible, while still recognizing the circumstances for women were not at all equal in any way.

I do wish that the director listened to Wang Xingyue, who apparently repeatedly suggested that Xiao Heng would be kissing Xue Fangfei in dramatic moments. But alas. We could have had it all. Still, just a glance or a touch was enough with these two to make anyone go weak.

Someone needs to give the actors a modern drama together now.

I didn't really even need the little extra at the end, but still, thank you show for giving us more silly moments with these two. I really enjoyed them. Someone said the producer said they filmed it in response to people interpreting the ending as sad. It's definitely vague and artistic, but I had thought it was hopeful the first time I watched it and it sounds like that was the intention.

[aettuddae]

hole in one — chapter 132.

⌕ synopsis: at one of the most prestigious universities in the country, where everyone is battling to be the center of attention, yu jimin is just a regular. people want her because of her beauty, but all she cares about is sharing her freaky stuff with her friends and passing her subjects. although there's one thing that might push her out of her comfort zone, revenge. when nakamura kazuha, one of the richest and most well-known students of NCU, starts to spread gossip about her for thousands of followers to see, jimin decides to get back by taking away the thing kazuha cares about the most: her perfect girlfriend, the young golf star, kwon haru.

masterlist | prev | next

[written chapter]

[warning: suggestive]

haru was lying on the bed in her hotel room. she had already had too much partying during those days and was tired, physically and mentally, to join any plan that wasn't strictly established in the wedding itinerary, such as the outing where all her friends were. so she took advantage of eunseo's departure which left the room just for her to watch television until she felt like going to sleep.

it was 3:25 a.m. and she still didn't feel sleepy.

she was completely absorbed in the plot of the show she was watching, so much so that she didn't hear when someone knocked on her door. but then, the second time they knocked louder, distracting her from the screen.

she got up and walked to the door, opening it, and revealing karina who was waiting behind it. with her body leaning against the frame, and exuding an intense smell of alcohol. when they found themselves facing each other, she didn't move, just raised her eyes to make contact, looking a little sad, but surely it was just the effect of the alcohol. without a word, she entered the room, walking past haru, as she had entered her apartment the morning she walked out of her life.

"lucky you opened up, i was worried i'd gotten the room mixed up and was knocking on some stranger's door at three in the morning." she took a seat on the edge of the bed and then dropped her back onto the mattress, letting out a long sigh.

for the way she smelled, she didn't seem that drunk. if anything her words were understandable and she didn't stutter or mix them up.

but to dare to be there at that moment, she had to have had enough to drink.

"but i am a stranger to you." alleged the resident of the room. "we don't have the relationship for you to be here at this hour."

"haru, you're literally the love of my life, shut up." she contradicted downplaying the other's words, her eyes closed, trying to calm the dizziness she felt.

the golfer couldn't help the jab she felt in her chest when she heard those words. it felt like she had just been shot with an arrow, something like the depressing version of cupid.

loving someone is beautiful until they disappoint you and make it hurtful to hear them say that they do, in fact, love you.

"what are you doing here?" she folded her arms.

"what were you watching?" she turned her head slowly so she wouldn't get the whole place spinning and rested her gaze on the television. "what's that?"

"a drama about a god..." she was suddenly silent. "hey, i asked you what you're doing here." she resumed the main topic.

"juyeon." she said casually as she straightened up to sit on the bed, and slowly began to survey her surroundings.

"what with juyeon?" she asked without getting an answer as the girl was distractedly looking for something. "what are you doing?" she was getting desperate as she couldn't manage to hold a conversation with her.

"i'm looking for the remote, i want to put shinchan on." she explained without looking at her.

"jimin!" she exclaimed nagging at her.

"what?" she closed her eyes due to the headache that the rise in volume in haru's voice had generated in her.

"what happened to juyeon?" she repeated.

"oh, nothing." she shook her head calmly. "she was with me at the club." she mentioned. "we stopped by the hotel to get some things, and she was going to continue partying with the others, so i realized you would be alone here and asked her if i could come see you." she raised her head, looking at haru. "she said yes, and that she knew we had things to talk about. so here i am." she grabbed the edges of the jacket she was wearing and took it off.

"you never think about talking to me when you're sober?" she accused remembering how the two times they had interacted the entire trip had been with alcohol involved.

"i talk to you all the time." she informed, but only succeeded in confusing haru, who furrowed her eyebrows and moved her head sideways indicating she hadn't understood. "i write to you all the time."

"you write to me?" she pointed to herself. "like in the notebook?" she referenced the classic movie.

"no." she waved her hand dismissing her assumption. "or maybe yes." she changed her mind. "i've never seen the notebook, what happens in it?"

"i haven't seen it either, i only know that particular scene." she shared grumpily.

"let's watch it!" proposed karina excitedly, stretching her arms out and leaning forward a bit so she could take haru's hands and pull her to where she was.

"jimin." she averted her gaze to the side, frustrated. "didn't you come to talk to me?"

"let's talk after we watch the notebook." she released her grip on haru and rested her hands on the sheets, using them to propel herself backwards so that she was even more in the center. "and an episode of shinchan." she added eagerly.

"no." she interrupted her plans. "if you have nothing to say to me now, please leave." she pointed her finger at the entrance.

"can't we have a good time before we bring up subjects that hurt us?" she questioned, finally finding the TV remote.

"no." she vindicated, climbing one knee onto the bed so she could reach over to karina and snatch the device out of her hands. "you lost that privilege two years ago."

"yes, i know." her face took on a grim tone. "i'm aware of that, i told you i've been writing to you. that's why i'd like to spend a moment with you where i don't embarrass myself."

"can you tell me what the fuck that means?" she demanded annoyed.

jimin rolled her eyes, tired, and let herself fall back again, lying down. she brought her hand to look for her phone that was in one of her pockets, but she couldn't remember which one due to the intoxication she had. finally, when she found it, she took it out, unlocked it and opened the chat she had kept all this time with haru's blocked number. she turned the appliance over, showing the contents of the screen to the older one and started to slide her finger over it upwards, showing her all the messages she had been sending during those two years.

"that's my chat?" she looked dumbfounded at what the younger one was showing her, who just nodded her head as she continued to scroll up.

"you're like my personal diary. i write to you." she turned off the object and put it aside, keeping her eyes on the ceiling, emotionless.

haru had nothing to say. she felt that any words were too much, that anything that came out of her mouth would cut through the tension that had risen between them, only for the shards of it to hurt them, like broken glass. she could only take a seat near the girl, and try to form an opinion regarding what she was discovering.

"it's all there." continued jimin speaking as she noticed the disengagement in haru. "christmas, new years, our birthdays, when you moved out, my reaction to your relationship with juyeon, my complaints about yujin, my commentary about your matches." her voice began to tremble. "every time i needed to tell you that i loved you and missed you, i did it there." tears began to escape her eyes, even though she tried to suppress them because she felt pathetic enough. "every damn day for two years, even if my friends told me it wasn't healthy, even if i felt miserable doing it, i wrote you, i texted you."

"why? you knew i wouldn't respond." she realized, her mood dropping, turning sour.

"because even if you had me blocked..." she sat up and then used her palms to wipe the weeping from her cheeks. "it's your number." she said simply. "it was something about the idea that there was only one step between you and me, that you only had to press 'unblock this contact' to get you back in my life." she brought her eyes up until they met kwon's. "i just wanted to keep you with me somehow."

silence reigned within those walls every time karina finished a sentence. haru was lost in deep thought, wandering in her own mind regarding the information she kept receiving. she lifted her legs, bringing them up against her chest and wrapping her arms around them, then resting her chin on one of her knees.

"can you say something?" pleaded jimin in desperation because now she was the one who was getting no reactions to what she was saying. "do you even care?"

"i don't know what to say." she confessed, looking far away.

"really?" she exploded angrily, threatening to burst into tears again. "i don't know, haru, tell me how you felt over the years, i don't know." she asked in an outburst. "why did you go to incheon? it wasn't because of me, was it?"

"yes, it was because of you." she admitted. "well, because of you, because of kazuha, because my apartment depressed me." she began to breathe shakily as she remembered her past. "because i would walk or drive around town and think about you, and go to the club and feel like an idiot." she rubbed her hands across her distressed face. "juyeon had a job proposal there, and she asked me if i wanted to go with her for a change of scenery." she revealed. "and juyeon is the only person i don't relate to you, so it seemed like a good plan."

"sorry for making it sad to even think about me." she expressed with her head lowered pitifully.

"you're really sorry?" she inquired incredulously. "you texted me every day for these two years, and i, on my side, devoted myself to torturing myself wondering if you were really sorry." with her nails she began to hurt the skin on her hands because of the anxiety that this moment provoked in her. "but i still can't find an answer."

"i have missed you every day that has passed." she couldn't hold back her emotions any longer. "every place i went, i waited for you to show up. every person i talked to, i waited for them to mention you so i could talk about you." she moved on the bed until she was kneeling on it, positioning herself in front of haru. "i tried to love someone else because everyone kept telling me to get over you, and i could never feel half as much as you make me feel. even when we broke up it didn't hurt like the day you and i parted ways." she gently took the older woman's face between her fingers. "i couldn't even hear the word 'golf' without wanting to burst into tears, i couldn't watch a single match until you started playing again. for two years i lived waiting for you, and i don't regret that because i genuinely believe you are the person i will love the most in my life, and that's worth it." she moved her thumbs, stroking the woman's skin. "but i do regret hurting you, lying, because that's what drove you away from me." she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. "i will never forgive myself for doing something that took you away from me."

"do you really love me?" she plunged desperately into the brown eyes she adored so much, searching for explanations, or hope.

"more than i can understand." she affirmed.

haru was so drowned in her emotions that she didn't even spend her time thinking reasonably about her actions. it only took jimin telling her that she loved her and regretted it to grab her by the waist and pull her tightly to her, gluing her to her body, causing her to wrap her arms around her. she slid one of her palms down the back of her leg until she reached her knee and pushed off it, giving her a signal to sit on her lap.

when she had her straddling her, their faces at the same height, just inches apart, they both pounced against each other to see who would reach the other's lips first, who would take control of the kiss they would share. but between such urgency and need for their touch, they couldn't even establish who had won.

jimin's fingers ran along haru's jaw, neck and part of her back, only to end up tangling and tugging at the older's hair, who had her hands framing her body like a sculpture, from her legs, to the thighs that jimin knew fascinated her, to her back and waist, holding her firmly and urging her to rock on her. although it wasn't necessary for kwon to do anything, jimin was already in search of friction on her own.

the mouth of the eldest of the two drew across her skin until it found her neck, where it aimed to kiss, bite and suck wherever there was room. jimin was torn between letting her head fall back to give her more territory and the almost inevitable desire she had to keep her lips on her, leaving chaste kisses on which faction of her face was closest.

haru disengaged from her a bit, earning whining of complaint from her, only to be able to undo the shirt she wore and then toss it somewhere on the wide mattress. reconnecting with her body to take care of her collarbones and chest. the older's nails digging in and trailing down her bare back as if trying to create a passageway through which to get inside her, and jimin didn't mind because she knew that as soon as she removed the woman's clothes, she would leave marks where she could as well.

the younger girl took both sides of her opposite's face and carefully, but firmly, had her tilt it so that her ear was right in front of her mouth, "i missed you so much." she murmured into this one before fleetingly biting her lobe, then positioning her so that she could rejoin their lips in an agitated, frantic snogging. she broke away just a little, her mouth still over haru's, "i love you so much."

they met again, ready to continue what they were doing, but haru's breathing was getting too agitated. jimin thought it was normal, so she didn't think much of it. until the golfer stopped the affection and simply hugged her tightly, hiding her face in her neck.

"haru?" she spoke trying to regulate her breathing, then wrapped the girl in her arms tenderly, not understanding what was going on. "hey, are you crying?" she was elated to notice that her neck was getting wet and the girl was sobbing in her grip. "haru?"

"i tried to hate you." she blurted out suddenly, her voice almost stuck in her throat. "i was so angry with you that i thought the solution would be to hate you so i could turn over to a new page." the girl was doing her best to make her words come across correctly. "but i waited for you every day of these two years too." the pressure on her body grew, as if haru was trying to hold her the closest possible to her. "i waited for you to go to the airport to set me off, to wish me a happy birthday, and i even wished for you to watch my matches." she swallowed saliva to try to undo the knot of sadness that wouldn't let her speak. "even if you hurt me, i couldn't stop thinking about you at any moment. i missed you too."

jimin left a peck at the top of haru's head, resting there as she breathed in the scent of her shampoo. she stroked her back and nape up and down intending to give her support and help her calm down. as her eyes glazed over as she heard the girl's confession.

"i just wanted to know that you wouldn't do something like that to me again so i could come back to you." she admitted. "i love you too, my princess." she reciprocated karina's feelings for the first time.

"do you?" she suddenly pulled away from her so she could look into her eyes.

the older girl nodded her head in response to her question, and jimin kissed her again, this time laden with optimism, love and sweetness. it was almost as if she was thanking her for opening up and sharing her feelings.

"i love you." repeated jimin. "i love you, and i promise i will never hurt you again, not after knowing what it's like to live without you." she assured, then leaving short smooches on her lips. "calm down, okay? we're going to be alright." she pleaded noticing that haru couldn't stop her tears.

the younger girl lifted herself from the woman's lap, and tenderly directed her to lie down between the pillows just behind her. she positioned herself on top of her, brushed the bothersome locks from her face, dried her tears, and caressed her cheek lovingly.

"let's go to sleep, shall we? don't worry, i'm here with you." she gave her a comforting smile, getting one from the older girl.

"my clothes are over there." haru finally spoke once she was calmer, and pointed to a suitcase lying on the floor. "put on something comfortable."

"okay." agreed the younger girl. "i missed wearing your clothes too." admitted the girl making the athlete laugh.

(!)

— taglist: @runawaymazola @chaenniefirst @livelaughchoerry @rinapomu @jeindall777 @petruchiosstuff @sewiouslyz @yvesismywife @vvyuqi @aeriniee @jenlisaforthewin

[suzuran777]

Nitro Chiral April Fools’, 2005 - 2021

Nitro Chiral recently announced that they will probably not create any new content for April Fools’ in the future. I remember really looking forward to this every year, so I was a bit sad to hear that...! They mentioned that they might change this decision again some day, so we will just have to wait and see... To remember all of the fun jokes they’ve created throughout the years I wanted to make a fun compilation of all their previous April Fools’ jokes (or at least the ones I remember and took screenshots of). Maybe someone already posted something similar, but I had a lot of fun looking at these old pictures again! 

2005 Togainu no Chi 'Vischio Jack'. This was just one month after Togainu no Chi was released! Nitro Chiral’s website was filled with Arbitro’s hobbies. He announced that the next game will be called ‘Makeinu no Chi’ which means ‘blood of the losers’... The new main visual also shows all of them bleeding from their noses lol.

Some interesting new items... the Shiki body pillow?

2006 A year later Arbitro hijacked the official website once more and comments on each Lamento character. He seems to be a fan of Konoe but the others aren't his type... This blog describes it in greater detail (Japanese only). Second part of the website teases the Togainu no Chi fighting game (咎狗の血 餓狗 Mark of the Dogs). I kind of wish they really made this game because the description of it sounds fun.

2007 Lamento Love Love Gakuen, which was later made into a real drama CD also started as an April Fools' joke! Asato is Konoe’s childhood friend in this, Rai the student council president and Bardo’s a health education teacher. 

You can still listen to some of the audio clips from the original page here! The plot doesn’t seem much different than the real drama CD they ended up making later. 

2009 Nitro Chiral mentioned they couldn’t do anything for April Fools’ 2008, but they were back in 2009 with..one of the weirder ones. They posted a teaser of their new game, ‘Sweet Potchari’ which literally means ‘sweet chubby’ and as the name suggests, they posted art of all of the sweet pool characters, but this time they’re chubby.

You could check the profile description of each character and Kunihito’s description mentions that he’s very charming and “both men and women love him” lol. I unfortunately don’t have any high quality versions of these wallpapers anymore. Someone also recorded the voice lines, though listen to it at your own risk.

2010 This time Nitro Chiral announces a new project called 'YO! Akira'. It’s Togainu no Chi except all of the characters are replaced by mannequins and they’re kinda terrifying. They made videos in which they re-created part of the opening and the game, which someone actually saved and uploaded, so you can still watch it here...! The whole thing is a parody of Japanese sketch comedy series 'Oh! Mikey!!' which focuses on an American family living in Japan, but all the characters are played by mannequins.

This blog has some more pictures of what the website looked like. The day after this Nitro Chiral made a blog post about maybe spending too much time creating these April Fools’ jokes, but it seems like they had fun! They also had no idea what to do with the mannequins after this.

2012 I think they skipped 2011 because I cannot find any information about it, so let’s move on to 2012! Arbitro took over the Nitro+Chiral website again and changed it to Bitro+Chiral...

You could play this short visual novel on the website in which Arbitro introduced his new product line-up. A hataki (feather duster) shaped like Konoe’s tail, a life-sized Akira statue made of chocolate, Onnushi-sama's curry, and blue butter which is supposed to decrease you appetite so you don't have to eat anymore. After looking at these last two pictures I think I don’t feel hungry anymore...

This is also the year DRAMAtical Murder was released, so they changed the website too! Now it’s DRAMAtical Mother, which is of course referencing the Mother series (Earthbound). You can find some more screenshots and information here.

Aoba got his own Twitter account too this year, which someone also archived here! The Twitter account actually still exists but I believe they locked it after April Fools’ ended. 

2013 This year they focused on DRAMAtical Murder too! They transformed the website into Junkshop Heibon's webstore (the store Aoba works at in the game). It feels kind of nostalgic... 

That same year they also released a radio show in which Aoba and Mizuki work for Midorijima Radio Station. They invite Koujaku, Noiz, Clear, and Mink as special guests. This has been uploaded and fan translated, so I definitely recommend checking it out here! They also ended up selling this as a CD later.

2014 This is one I remember very well because I remember playing the short game they released. It's called ‘Osu-Boys!! ~Ikemen Ryoujoku ☆ Paradise~’ and it's a short visual novel which features the four protagonists, except they're all really clumsy and end up in some really embarrassing situations... I am guessing the artstyle is supposed to be similar to KyoAni’s Free! anime.

I don’t think I can show the full pictures here because the CGs of this game are quite NSFW, but you can probably still find them somewhere online. Aoba worked at an adult goods shop in this game though, nice new job (?). Unlike the browser games, this one could be downloaded, so some people probably still have it.

2015 Arbitro once again returns and opens his own 'hentai' museum.... yeah. Someone uploaded the theme song they made for the website, you can find it here. I believe it’s supposed to be a parody of ‘Atami Hihokan’ (an adult museum).

The website shows a map of the museum and its facilities, some more pictures can be found here. I think the art of the mascots is pretty cute this time...

You could also play this minigame on the website which also featured the four protagonists. There’s still a video of someone playing through the game, so definitely check it out if you’re interested. The artstyle has a bit of a retro feel.

2016 This year the website turned into the 'Raira-ryuu honpo' official homepage, an art school that specializes in the traditional art of ...boys love. All of the characters are drawn like famous Ukiyo-e paintings.

All of the ones above are Tōshūsai Sharaku paintings, so it was pretty easy to find which ones they were referencing!

They also re-drew all of the game covers too and the descriptions of the games were pretty funny. Midorijima was transformed into a big red-light district and the people who lived there were kicked out and are now living in poverty. I hope you’re surviving, Aoba...

This time there was also a flash game which could be played on the website, a shunga (erotic painting) puzzle. You can find all of these pictures here. Like the previous year they are heavily censored and not really NSFW. 

2017 This time the April Fools’ joke is a parody of 'The World of GOLDEN EGGS', a Japanese animation series set in an American-style fictional town, except this time it’s called ‘BOYs LOVE Nitro+CHiRAL’. I’m assuming most people who have been in the fandom for some time remember this one. They created a short YouTube video series and it had English subs. You can still find the videos if you look for them on YouTube so please watch them...! It’s all worth it for Konoe singing ‘I’m in Blue’ and the Rhyme fight.

Youji is always the victim of these awkward conversations... Some more pictures here! You can find the YouTube videos by just searching for the title of the series mentioned above.

2019 After 2017 they stopped updating their website on April Fools’, probably because they were busy working on Slow Damage, but in 2019 they did post some extra illustrations. Not the most happy kind of illustrations, featuring the protagonists and Naito-kun apologizing because they couldn’t do anything for April Fools’ that year...

2021 Unfortunately this is the last one! 2021 is the year Slow Damage was released, so it makes sense the final April Fools' joke focuses on them. It's called 'Warau Euphoria', which means ‘laughing euphoria’. It’s a reference to Japanese series 'The Laughing Salesman', so they're also drawn in a similar artstyle. 

The website has a warning that you need to be over 35 years old to enter instead of the usual 18+ warning lol. They also got Towa’s voice actor to record a couple of new lines on the webpage, if you click here you can still listen to a recording of it.

I’m a bit sad they might not do any of this stuff anymore in the future, but I’m also glad many people recorded videos of the old websites and minigames so we can still enjoy them even now. I couldn’t include every single screenshot in this blog post, so I tried my best to link other pages with more information.

I had a lot of fun checking out their website every year and I really appreciate the effort they put into all of this. I might update this blog with some additional info later!

[periwinklekryptonite]

hey hi how does travis parallel common feminine tropes? i need to hear from the travis expert

Okay, so the "Problem" is that there's a preface and conclusion that's, like, way longer than just my bit about Travis's funny little parodies and then genuine relationship with femininity. While answering this ask, I realized just how big it is and I don't want to unload all of it here because I am just. Too tired all of the time to have all of it done in one swipe, and my attempt to do so ended up frustrating me more than anything LMAO

I write this with the promise that I'll expand on it and actually get to the meat of your question. I have a lot of it written, already!

The preface is easy: what's up with Travis and his relationship with gender?

Travis is trying to present as a very masculine, powerful character. It's an easy defense mechanism when he's alone in a crowded room. The thing many people fail to consider is that he doesn't know any of these people, and he probably dislikes most (if not all) of them on principal. The girls have a bond that existed in the before times, and Travis doesn't. He's an outsider. He's trying to grasp for some semblance of control by playing a sort of parody of the stoic, macho man... and it doesn't work.

Because of how he does this, a lot of people into the show are not into Travis. He's one of the only characters that are overtly and loudly misogynistic. It makes sense that people don't want to look past that when he acts so nasty. This means many write him off as exactly what Travis wants people to think he is.

Kevin Alves says it best in his Boys by Girls interview. I suggest reading the whole thing, it says a lot of what I'm saying and more.

So, even though he's pushing this masculine agenda when he's in the wreck with all the girls, my assumption in him has always been that he's never been the most big or the most masculine of guys at school. This is him really trying to pretend to be someone that he is not, this is not him.

This dramatized, fictional version of him is how he thinks he'll find a place within the group. The alternative is getting Coach Ben-ed and slowly being ousted from the group. Sitting in the back room and rotting in complete solitude just seems like a downer.

(Here he is looking sad for emphasis)

Travis was never the top dog. The girls do not take him seriously when he acts like this, and he probably wasn't taken very seriously in school. His insecurities lead to a lot of failures in his relationship with Javi and Nat, and no relationship with anyone else. If it continued any further than it did, he would've died for this. Like with Jackie, he'd be frozen out.

What Travis learns, and we learn as well, is that to be part of the in-group, you must also be a part of the dominant culture in the cabin and Wilderness itself. For Travis to be a part of the Yellowjackets, Travis must also be one of the girls.

Travis's story, the link between season 1 and season 2, is one of transition.

Some interpret this as a social transition, but I believe it to be literal.

The surviving group is not "the Yellowjackets and also Travis." By the end of season 2, (actually by the end of Qui,) Travis is indistinguishable from the rest. He's eaten Jackie with them, he's given blood to Shauna, he's taken blood from Lottie, he has led the group in their second act of cannibalism. Travis is a Yellowjacket.

Credit where credit is due:

@monstrousgourmandizingcats really helped me grind out these ideas and has a lot of cool YJ takes in general, and most of the screenies were given to me by @nicothecowboy.

Now, for YJ Fic Writer's Weekend I should hopefully have the part of this that you asked about ready. Until then, I have some interviews, and I cannot recommend the PaleyFest panel more. It has a lot about Travis in S2 and his relationship with Nat and Lottie.

[sillymercury]

Hey Lucien!

Lucien x Musical!Reader

<3

Warnings: slight suggestiveness and some angst :p

Word count: 4.5k

Summary: You’ve been trying so long to make Lucien understand that he doesn’t have to try so hard for someone who doesn’t want him - not when you already love everything about him. When you decide to sing all the things you’ve been too scared to say, your mind can’t help but drift back to all the special moments that inspire you.

Based off ‘Hey Stephen’ by Taylor Swift

<3

“Hey Lucien, I know looks can be deceiving

But I know I saw a light in you

And as we walked we would talk

And I didn't say half the things I wanted to”

The wind gently blew my hair carrying the salty smell of the Sidra with it. The lights of the city were dancing on the water and I felt an ease fall over me as we walked through the city that was winding down.

“I would’ve moved here ages ago if I knew how beautiful this city was,” Lucien spoke gently as he basked in the peaceful air. At his words I couldn’t help but steal a glanced over and at that moment all of my breath was stolen from me. He looked majestic in the soft light from the setting sun, the tranquillity that rested on his features had my heart doing flips.

His face looked as if it had been carved from marble with a gentle, steady hand. His strong jaw that contoured into perfectly high cheekbones. His pointed nose that rested above perfect plump lips that looked ever so inviting. I saw his russet eye whirl as he took in his surroundings and in my imagination my fingers danced over his scars. The tanned skin on his face was painted with freckles and I wanted to kiss every one. And his hair, gods, his hair. It flowed down his back in gentle curls with the top half tied back; his bangs framed his face like a curtain flowing in the wind.

I let my eyes roam his entire body, his lean and muscled frame. His classic navy blue and gold tunic cut to fit him perfectly and the dark long sleeves that showed off the muscles lightly flexing in his arm.

“If I even knew it existed,” he laughed and the ariose melody knocked me out of my trance. I shook my head and laughed as well, bringing a hand to my mouth to make sure I wasn’t actively drooling.

“Well you’re here now,” I beamed up at him as I looped my arm through his. “And thank goodness, I’ve been in desperate need of a friend.”

He looked down at me and smiled and for the second time my breath was gone. I’ve never seen someone lit from the inside, but Lucien, he glowed.

“Of all the girls tossing rocks at your window

I'll be the one waiting there even when it's cold

Hey Lucien, boy, you might have me believing

I don't always have to be alone”

I sighed as I turned around and motioned for the bartender to bring me another one. Lucien was chatting up a pretty blonde female who found him very funny. He was charming and ladies flocked to his flame like moths, I just happened to be the one he never noticed.

I couldn’t help but wonder if he would go home with her as I threw back what was left of my stiff drink. He very seldom did, he was serious about courting Elain but she had evaded him for years now so he indulged when he “couldn’t help himself.” Most females only lasted a night, either not wanting more or running when they learned of his mate. He always thought it was fair, “Who would want me when my mate doesn’t even want me” he would joke in a sad tone. ‘Me!’ I would chant in my mind.

I didn’t care about Elain, and I would never admit to my dark fantasies of making her pay for the pain she put him through by stringing him along. I waited for the day she would finally reject him and I could pick up the pieces but it seemed she enjoyed taking her time deciding.

Perhaps one day she will choose him and I’ll remain the same, an after thought in the background of beautiful picture. I slumped forward resting my chin in my hand with another sigh. I spaced out while staring down the cup at the swishing the brown liquor, not noticing the presence behind me until warm hands met my shoulders.

“Put your nose any further in that cup and you’ll drown.”

I whirled around at the voice, “Lucien,” I breathed more to myself. Quickly scanning the floor behind him I didn’t see the blonde female anywhere. Looking back up into his eyes I gave him a small smile that mirrored his, “What happened, did you scare her off?”

Lucien just laughed as he took the stool next to me, motioning to the bartender for a drink of his own. “Nah,” he shook his head, his hair was down today and it swished around his face. He looked to me and his smile got wider, “I just would rather be with you.”

He nudged my shoulder as he spoke and I had to look away to hide my blush, how I wished that were really true.

“Hey Lucien, I've been holding back this feeling

So I've got some things to say to you (ha)

I've seen it all, so I thought

But I never seen nobody shine the way you do

The way you walk, way you talk, way you say my name”

“Thanks,” I smile as I accept the champagne from the tray, the store assistant only smiles in response.

I sip the expensive drink as I take in the scene of the small boutique. There were only 2 other shoppers in the hidden store, both are touchy couples searching for matching sets. I wonder briefly on the events they’re attending, balls, dates, or dinner parties. For a brief moment I let myself pretend I’m waiting for my partner, in my fantasy he’s looking for the perfect Tux to meet my father.

The fantasy dies when my rational mind cohorts with my insecurities and reminds me of reality. In reality Lucien is preparing for a dinner party at the river house, his carefulness and precision is for his mate, not me.

He was so excited at the invitation, dragging me out of my apartment saying he “absolutely needs the female opinion.” My heart broke every time he brought her up, “should I bring her flowers?” “I wish I knew what color she was wearing so I could match” “I hope she lets me sit next to her” and “I’m going to try sending something down the bond. Love? No. Adoration? Maybe she’ll like that.”

I know I have no room to be jealous, my jealousy is unfair to every party. I just hate how much he has to overthink with her, every interaction is like a chess move. With me… he could be himself. It would be natural and easy, no forcing interactions or twisting arms for conversations.

I’m pulled out of my mind when the door to the changing station opens and Lucien strolls out. His walk is lax, with one hand in his pocket and the other rubbing his jaw. He’s clearly stressed but he looks so damn good, the view has me pressing my thighs together and shifting awkwardly.

He stops in front of me and the way he looks down has me biting my lip trying to control my bodies reaction. I couldn’t think of anything more horrific than flooding the intimate boutique with my arousal. In all my time I’ve never seen a male that can stop time, not like Lucien Vanserra. The world could catch fire and I would stop to stare, unaware.

He’s wearing a maroon suite with a white undershirt and he has his jacket pulled up, leaving every vein in his arms on full display. With his hair in a tight bun he looks positively divine. I look him over multiple times, greedily drinking in every detail.

“Y/N,” his smooth voice meets my ears and the way he says my name, low and methodical. I bite back the involuntary moan when it’s half way up my throat, leaving just an awkward grunt in response.

His face twists lightly displaying confusion before he continues, “I asked what you thought.”

I take the opportunity to inspect him one more time, and want to kick myself. The naughty thoughts invading my brain are shoved into a box with the promise of being delt with later.

“You’re beautiful,” I breathe out before I can conjure up a more appropriate response, a response fit to be given to a friend. “It’s beautiful, you look great.”

A light blush touches his cheeks and the butterflies in my stomach move with the force of a hurricane. The smile he gives me sets that hurricane on fire. He leans down and grabs both of my hands, pulling me into a standing position. Lucien’s lips connect with the skin on my knuckles and I lock my legs to keep them from giving out.

Just friends. Just friends. Just friends.

As if sensing what I need to hear he speaks, “Your such and amazing friend. Thank you.” He pulls me into a quick hug that I don’t return. I remain slack in his arms as I fight the tears away, giving them the promise of release later as well. He pulls back and smiles one last time before heading back to the changing room.

I fall back to the couch lamely and my hand presses to my mouth, as if that would keep all the grief from spilling out.

I remember hearing later that Elain also wore a maroon dress that night.

“It's beautiful, wonderful, don't you ever change

Hey Lucien, why are people always leaving?

I think you and I should stay the same”

“I think I’m going to cut my hair,” Lucien states casually and the book that was inches from my face falls to my lap, completely forgotten.

“What?” I respond not being able to hide the pure shock. Lucien’s hair was my favorite feature and I know he loved it too.

“I’m just thinking of trying something different,” he shrugs and my mouth falls open at his blaśe attitude.

“But you love your hair?” The statement turned to a question as it left my mouth. I think over all the times he’s gushed about his hair, his products, styles, and accessories. He loves his hair more than a lot of females I’ve met.

Yeah, I do but-“ his hesitation tells me everything and I know exactly where this is coming from. An involuntary sigh leaves my lips as he goes on, “it’s been long for so long, hundreds of years at this point. I’m ready to try something new. Plus it’s hair, it’ll always grow back.”

My lips fell into a thin line and I looked away briefly while shaking my head. I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep the anger from shining through. Anger that he felt he hand to change for someone, anger that he was willing to do it, anger that it was for his ungrateful mate. I knew Elain didn’t ask or insinuate that he should cut his hair, but she made him feel like he should. That thought alone had my blood boiling.

“You don’t have to change anything,” I finally turned to him with pleading eyes. I hoped my convincing would be enough as I went on, “Just stay the same Lucien.”

“I’ll still be Lucien,” his words were softer, he knew I knew. He leaned in and placed a strong hand over mine, “I’ll always be your friend.”

Not having the strength for words, my eyes fell to the book in my lap as I just nodded.

The next time I saw him he had a low taper fade and I couldn’t help but recall a certain shadowsinger.

“They're dimming the street lights

You're perfect for me

Why aren't you here tonight?

I'm waiting alone now

So come on and come out

And pull me near

And shine, shine, shine”

I walk alone tugging my jacket tighter around my frame, every piece of exposed skin burns from the frigid air. Winter had come no holds barred, ice had taken the Sidra and snow coated everything. Winter in Velaris was breathtaking and I had no problem with the cold, but tonight it felt like my heart had froze.

I watched bitterly from the bridge as couple skated around the Sidra. Some held onto each other, helping whichever person had fallen. Some danced around each other, making lovely patterns in the ice. Some played a game of cat and mouse, skating in circles trying to catch each other. There were a plethora of couples on the bank that had taken to indulging in snowball fights, snow angles, and snowmen. The sun was sinking low in the sky and the dim fae lights cast a gentle glow across the city.

Love seemed to permeate the air, everywhere I looked I saw people happily enjoying the snow with their partners. People avoided coming near me, probably due to the resentful way I watched them. My heart ached to join, to enjoy the snow with the person I loved. But the person I loved wasn’t here.

Lucien had offered to take Elain dog sledding, much to everyone’s surprise she said yes. Her yes turned into multiple invitations so Lucien was spending the evening with most of the inner circle, being pulled through the mountains by groups of dogs. My frown deepened at the thought, my brain conjuring up images of all the fun he was having.

I was the one who told him about the activity, having mentioned going with my brother on many occasions as a child. My brother had since moved to Summer, opting to live with his mate and help run the apothecary she inherited from her mother. So I was alone, achingly alone.

A laugh pulled my attention, loud and boisterous, it echoed through the air. It was a man, his lover who was clearly a day court immigrant was using his powers to light up the snowflakes as they fell. The tiny flakes glowed as they swirled beautifully around the couple and they danced under it like no one was watching. The day court man pulled the other in suddenly and held his face, whispered something that earned him smile before sharing a passionate kiss.

Everything shone around them, the flakes falling, the piles of snow around them, and their lips as they met. The Velarian man pulled away first, smiling to his lover before pulling him in and dancing slowly as the glittering flakes continued to fall.

I looked away clutching my heart, I didn’t hide the tears or try to fight them. I let them fall. How I wished to be pulled in like that. How I wished to shine like that. How I wish it was all with him.

“Hey Lucien, I could give you 50 reasons

Why I should be the one you choose

And that girl, well, she’s beautiful

But would she write a song for you? (Ha-ha)”

Today was a good day, I didn’t feel like crying or raging while I sat across from Lucien. Today I was just numb, able to listen to Lucien rant and rave about the wonders of his mate. Our little friendly lunch day had only lasted 20 minutes before he brought her up.

“She’s just so beautiful,” he spoke wistfully with his eyes looking past me, imagining her. I just sipped the tea silently, ‘beautiful but inconsiderate, she doesn’t care to know you like I do.’

“I need to get this right. I have to fight for her.” I offer a small nod, ‘I’m the one fighting, your every insecurity, every fear, every tear. I fight for you everyday.’

“She’s everything I’ve ever wanted,” I have to actively hold back a scoff ‘Even though she doesn’t get your humor? Even though she won’t share a drink with you? Even though she won’t step out in the rain that you love to walk through? Even though she can’t stand the smell of the mirthroot you often indulge in? Even though-‘

“I’d do anything for her,” his words halted my thought and I just looked at him. I forced myself to smile as my soul screamed, ‘She wouldn’t even write a song for you’

“I can't help it if you look like an angel

Can't help it if I wanna kiss you in the rain, so

Come feel this magic I've been feeling since I met you”

I placed my six string on its stand and moved to the front of the sage, making a grateful gesture with my hand, I bowed lightly. I held out my hands for the rest of the band to take and when they moved forward to grab it we all did a full bow together. I smiled at the crowd as they cheered. Performing filled the aches that came from the crushing loneliness.

I had many friends once upon a time, ones that knew me backward and forward and cheered me on the loudest. All of that changed in the attack on Velaris. I was meant to meet them in the park that day, to enjoy the monthly group picnic we all carved time for. A fight with my neighbor over something I can’t remember now had me running late. I stepped outside only to be shoved to the ground and told to take cover, Hybren was brutally assaulting our peaceful city. I hid cowardly, tucked under a cabbage stall as I watched my city be torn to shreds. It was hours after the smoke cleared that I learned the park, our park, was one of the first places to be attacked. None of my friends were able to seek cover.

That was over a year ago, I was doing better. I finally left my apartment, I finally sang again, I finally decided to act like a person. Granted, it was still hard but I was at least functioning.

I had gotten used to the new cheers, they were loud but somehow still quiet compared to when my friends would flood the hall with whoops and yells. But tonight was different, there was loud whooping coming from the back and my eyes caught the culprit. It was a lean redheaded male with his hands cupped around his mouth to increase his volume. It felt like a fire had started in my heart, like a small flower had bloomed in a barren land. He was beautiful and he was all I saw, I was half convinced a spotlight was shining on him drowning everyone else in darkness.

He came to me when I was giving pleasantries to the regulars. It felt like the world around us was moving in slow motion when he spoke, “That last song was amazing.” I scanned the entirety of his gorgeous face, he looked like heaven personified. An angel taking fae form to come and drag me from my comfortable hell.

I forced myself to speak after a couple awkward beats of silence, “Thank you,” I bowed lightly, hiding my blush with my tipped head.

“You wrote it,” his tone was somewhere between a statement and a question and his eye shone with intrigue while the other whirled rapidly.

“Yea- yeah I did,” I couldn’t hide my smile as pride shone through my heart. This beautiful man liked my song.

“It was amazing, and your voice- perfect!”

The blush returned and I couldn’t help but beam, “Thank you…” I drew out the last word as I cocked an eyebrow.

“Lucien,” Lucien. In that moment I never wanted to say another name again. His large hand extended in between us and when I took it I felt pure electricity. Literally it seems as in that moment lightning struck outside, the light rain was slowly unraveling into a storm.

“I’m Y/n, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you before,” I looked him over audaciously under the guise of trying to recognize him. I knew he was new in town, I would’ve remembered a face like that.

“Yea,” he smacked his hands together as he looked around the crowded hall, “I’m new around here.”

I smiled at that as I spoke boldly for the first time in over a year, “Well let me buy you a drink, as a welcome gift.” He smiled at that and I led him to a table to sit down.

One drink turned into six and soon we were laughing loudly in the now quiet hall. People had filtered out slowly over the last few hours and there were only a few tables left. The drinks help lower our guard and after some idle chit chat we shared our life stories as well as our most embarrassing ones. I felt an ease that had been evading me for so long, this Lucien was like magic, returning something I thought was lost.

He had mentioned his mate and that things weren’t going so well but if was so brief I almost forgot about it. I told him about my late parents, my brother’s departure, and the loss of my friends. He listened intently but didn’t respond pitifully, just a few tragic stories of his own.

After our last drink he offered to see me home which I gratefully accepted, stepping outside we were faced with the downpour we had been avoiding. I tried to tell him he didn’t have to walk me all the way to my apartment but he insisted, he also insisted on carrying my guitar case.

When we finally stepped out from under the awning I began to run only to be stopped by his hand around my wrist. Whipping around I yelled over the sound of the rain, “What are you doing?!”

“Oh come one!” He laughed, “Your not going to melt are you?”

It was my turn to laugh, “No.”

“Then let’s enjoy this,” his hand that was still around my wrist moved up to twirl me around earning a drunken giggle as I stumbled. “I love the rain.”

“Me too,” I breathed maybe a bit to softly for him to hear. That was never true before but seeing him with his head tilted back, smiling as water slipped down perfect cheekbones; I never loved anything more.

We danced some more, jumping around like children. He kicked a puddle in my direction earning a small scream, the devilish curve of his lips snapped something in me. His lips, I wanted nothing more than to grab his face and kiss him passionately. In my head it was playing out like some sappy romance but when I stepped towards him he took off laughing.

“Hey!” I yelled broken up by laughs as I took off after him. He was going into the opposite direction of my apartment but I didn’t tell him that.

“Can't help it if there's no one else

Mmm I can't help myself

Mmm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm

Mmm-mm, mm-mm”

I strummed one last time after I finished humming. I didn’t have the nerve to look up so I just stared at my six string until I heard a small sniffle. Snapping my head up I saw Lucien sitting across from me, he was letting his tears fall freely as he stared.

He had asked me to a picnic and at first I hesitated, I never thought I would have another but the idea of doing it with him encouraged me to be brave. I decided to take advantage of that bravery when I grabbed my guitar on the way out.

Today was the day I would sing to Lucien, just Lucien, with the song I wrote for him. I spent weeks working on it, feeling it should reflect the perfection of the person it was for. I never thought I would be singing it to him, too afraid it would ruin this beautiful friendship. Looking in the mirror this morning, ready to send for Lucien and cancel on the picnic I whispered to myself, “Be brave.” I chanted it over and over in my head until I was walking out with my journal and guitar case.

“Lucien-“ I whispered, feeling my own eyes prickle at his brazen display of emotion.

“You wrote that song for me?” He whispered back, cutting me off from saying anything else. I just nodded slowly and in response he screwed his eyes shut forcing more tears out. When he opened them he was turning his head, staring at the fields of the park working on controlling his breaths. After a few minutes of him not saying anything I started to panic, my heart fell to the bottom of my stomach and my hands were clammy as they gripped my instrument.

I felt the impending heartbreak, he was trying to find a way to let me down gently, crying because he was about to lose a friend. “Lucien I’m sorry. I shouldn’t-“

“I was beautiful,” he cut me off again, his eyes finally coming to mine as they swam with something I couldn’t place. “I loved it. I loved all of it.” I just stared mouth opening and closing like a lame fish, not knowing what to say. He grabbed my hand, and pulled it close to him, “I’ve never had anyone write me a song before,” his other hand slipped to my cup my cheek and my heart jumped at the action. “I’m so glad it was you.”

I moved the instrument off my lap and dove to wrap my arm around his neck. I cried, letting all the emotions I’ve been holding in for years out. His arms wrapped around me tightly as he cried into my neck. We sat like that for a few minutes before he pulled back, both hands grabbing my cheeks as his forehead pressed to mine.

“I’m so sorry,” he breathed, the proximity causing his breath to fan across my face. I went to disagree but he just shook his head again before continuing, “No. I’ve been chasing a daydream- a fantasy- when everything I’ve ever wanted was right in front of me. It took me so long, too long, to see it and I’m sorry.”

I pulled back to look into his eyes and I couldn’t stop the tears, I let them fall freely and I probably looked crazy as I smiled widely at him. “Don’t apologize, I would do it for another two years. For you.”

He shook his head and a small chuckle slipped out, “Well now you don’t have too.” His smiled too before bringing his lips to mine.

The world exploded. Stars came to earth and burst, spraying everything with their technicolor dust. I pulled him to me tightly as I finally felt what I’ve been waiting-seemingly my whole life- for. Our lips moved in perfect sync and neither of us could help the chuckles and the smiles that slipped through.

When he finally pulled away he stared at me with a wide smile, “Think you could sing that song for me one more time?”

I laughed and kissed him once more before leaning back and grabbing my six string.

A/N: Okay this one was soooooo much fun to write, and my baby LUCIENNN he deserves a love like this. Taylor Swift is mother and every time I hear her songs I envision beautiful stories. So big shout out to my sister who told me to write for this song specifically.

If you made it this far I LOVE YOUUUU and my asks are always open for requests <3

Masterlist

[lopposting]

Some more thoughts + notes on the datamine document!!

(Long!!)

[second part of this post ?]

thanks again to user @ ividyon for the document.

Judging by these lines, again, I think it's a cut story thread that P has to ask Venigni to repair him, thus revealing himself as a puppet to Venigni, but it also suggests that Venigni knew about Carlo

rough alt translation:

제페토 씨에겐 들었어. 팔을 다치신 탓에 내게 네 P기관 정비를 요청하시더군. 사실 네가 인형인 줄은 알고 있었어. 제페토 씨의 친구라면 그 사건에 대해 알 수 밖에 없거든… 슬픈 일이지만 내일의 희망에 집중해야지. I heard from Mr. Geppetto. Because of the arm injury, [he] requested to repair your P-Organ. The truth is, I already knew you were a puppet. If you're a friend of Geppetto's, one couldn't help but hear about what happened... It was a sad thing but I[one must] had to focus on the hope of tomorrow.

It implies Venigni is saying he knew we were a puppet because as a friend of Geppetto, he would've known about the death of Carlo. In the released game, he seems to be an older colleague and doesn't mention it at all, and I wonder if he even knew Geppetto had a son

About what we think happened to Carlo, and Venigni using the phrase "the case"("Any friend of Mr. Geppetto's has no choice but to know about the case"): the word he uses here 사건, which can mean something like a situation, a case, or an incident. It's also the word used by korean law enforcement to refer to a criminal "case". In this case though, I think it's closer to Venigni just referring to "what happened", as in Carlo's death.

Yet another version of this:

Honestly, I knew you were a puppet, but I didn't expect you to lie. It's creepy that Mr. Geppetto lifted his great promise

On Geppetto actually talking about Carlo to P:

It's my impression that in the released game, Geppetto never expected P to find out about Carlo because that would probably tip him off to what he was planning (P would probably refuse to hand over the heart?)

Also, Geppetto saying that Carlo was "intelligent" - I wonder if Carlo being a smart kid had something to do with Sophia calling us "Clever one" when we wake up?

REALLY interesting exchange with Geppetto

the exchange:

【그나저나... 내 예상보다 빠르게 깨어났더구나. 누군가 도와준 사람이 있니?】 【누군가 도와준 사람이 있니?】 소피아가 나를 깨웠다 혼자 열차 안에서 깨어났다

eng:

【By the way.. You woke up faster than I expected. 】 【Was there anyone that helped you? 】 Sophia woke me up I woke up on the train by myself

(note: If you tell Geppetto that someone named Sophia woke you up) 소피아라… 그렇구나. 그녀에겐 나중에 감사해야겠구나. Sophia... I should thank her later.

That sounds rather ominous to me. (it also doesn't have an english correspondent from what I see?)

and then what I think is IF you answer that you woke up by yourself- (emphasis mine)

널 깨워준 덕에 신시가지의 학살을 멈출 수 있었단다. 네가 자랑스럽구나. 말해줘서 고맙구나. 난 네가 자칫 잘못되었을까봐 두려웠단다 나에게만큼은 언제나 진실된 아이로 있어다오, 아들아. 널 되살리기 위해 수많은 희생을 치러야 했건만… 다시 어려운 부탁을 하게 되어 미안하구나.

eng:

Because of you waking up you were able to stop the massacre. I'm proud [of you]. I'm grateful you told me. I was worried that you might have gone wrong. To me, you'll always be my true child, son. I made so many sacrifices to revive you... I'm sorry to ask such difficult requests again.

It's occurring to me now that I think (나에게만큼은 언제나 진실된 아이로 있어다오, 아들아) can either be read as "Always be true to me, son" OR "To me you'll always be my true son" [as in, he's assuring the new puppet "Carlo" that he's still his son !?]

Again, I wonder if this dialogue is conditional, though. As in, he says "Sophia? I should thank her later..." if we tell the truth about Sophia, And if P tells him he "woke up by myself" we get the latter dialogue (Geppetto immediately accepts him as his son).

[chaifootsteps]

can this fandom stop doing abuse apologia for two seconds? please?

https://www.tumblr.com/pinkandpurple360/740860437950857216/this-back-and-forth-went-on-for-a-while-and-it?source=share

someone on xitter is claiming Stolas "didn't realize how predatory the deal is and got upset when he figured it out" and that he didn't knowingly do anything wrong, & there's "a difference between doing it knowingly and not realizing you have an unhealthy power dynamic" (and also that it wasn't actually a deal, Blitzo just thought it was?? or something?? I guess using the phrase 'favors for favors' and 'I give you X if you give me Y' somehow isn't a deal now, but idk - contradictory excuses again)

and like, what?? assuming Stolas somehow didn't realize - I mean, he called when Blitzo was getting shot at, kept pressuring him when there were gunshot sounds and Blitzo repeatedly saying he couldn't talk, but let's just entertain the hypothetical for a second: then how is that better?

"I used my power, status and your need to keep your job to coerce you into monthly sex"

vs

"I didn't realize the difference my power, status and your need to keep your job when I totally didn't coerce you into monthly sex and that was just the end result (because I still wanted sex from you and was going to get it one way or another)"

If anything the second possibility is scarier, tbh. The first one is awful but shows a baseline understanding of what it means for Stolas to be a royal and Blitzo to be an imp. He's at least aware on some level that what he's doing is coercive, has rationalized it away until now and while he's still an awful person, he could someday admit what he's done is wrong and not do it again.

The second one suggests a Stolas who has no real understanding of how the world around him actually works, or that it makes a massive difference for him to be a prince and Blitzo and imp. If he made that deal believing Blitzo freely consented to it then he has no understanding of how the lack of money and power dictates the lives of people below him, or how consent even works. He wouldn't be capable of even understanding what he's done wrong because he's incapable of understanding the forces that motivate those around him & he's functionally blind to his own ability to motivate the lower classes to do whatever he wants, even at the cost of their own bodies and time. Also like, ignorance is not an excuse.

And the saddest thing? I think the second version of Stolas is closer to the one in canon. Murder Family Stolas might have known exactly what he was doing, but s2 Stolas has been moving more and more towards "this situation is barely my fault at all" - the tweet saying he realized what he did wrong and it made him sad is giving Stolas too much credit, I suspect. imo everything is building towards Stolas letting him go not because he realizes what he did was wrong, but because he now wants something else from Blitzo - his love and affection and the ability to paint over ever having to think of his relationship with Blitzo as having involved coercion on his end. until then all we've seen him do is complain the "relationship" is a "lie", not notice or care that his "lover" is the exact same species as the servants he also exploits and abuses, and send passive-aggressive "I'm sorry if you were offended" type texts

tl:dr; but until Stolas says the words "I was wrong to use your job to get you to make the deal, I'm sorry and I was kidding myself you actually wanted to sleep with me this whole time" or something similar with no weasel-wording and putting the blame on Blitzo, I'm not going to believe he's learnt a damned thing. if anything I think the show is just going to lean more into making Stolas unaware of his flaws and privileges; attempting to make him more pitiable & sympathetic while accidentally making him more abhorrent

(also like, gee. how sad for Stolas. how awful it is for him to have realized he took advantage of someone. sure is nice for the story to focus on the feelings of the rich prince realizing he took advantage of someone instead of his victim coming to terms with that fact and breaking free. honestly, I hope these takes are all coming from the same couple of individuals; I'd hate to think the HB fandom is doing this on a widespread scale)

Sometimes, you've just got to wearily gesture to all of this.

[scoops-aboy86]

I'll send somethin' for the kiss ask game prompts!

💕

💕 kissing somewhere other than lips

(send a heart to make me write meme)

I'm just going to post this, because it's actually my second attempt. The first I'm going to save for the vampire Eddie fic I'm working on... Both are sad, because this is a rough week/month, and I don't feel like doubling this currently 1.2k word count on this to resolve it into a happy ending right now.

But I am open to suggestions on where to go with it, to keep in my back pocket for finishing it later.

-

They’re not dating, but Eddie spends a lot of time at Steve’s big house for someone who still technically lives in the local trailer park. 

They’re not dating, but he lets Steve dote on him. Eddie shares his weed without even bothering to charge him anymore, which is a friendship perk that historically only his band mates enjoy; Steve, in turn, provides movies and meals and snacks in between. 

They’re not dating, but when they’re both stoned as fuck they twine together on the couch, alternating who’s laying on who because it’s warm and nice and they’re both a little touch starved. It’s started happening even when Robin is there, and she keeps side-eyeing them like she’s waiting for some sort of announcement of What It Means. 

Which is ridiculous because they’re just friends. Steve doesn’t even kiss him on the mouth; he kisses him everywhere else. 

Like now, when Steve is sprawled half on top of him and half wedged in against the back of the couch, mouth on the soft part of Eddie’s shoulder. It’s all soft—all those snacks have done their work, all the lounging around Steve’s living room while still recovering from the Upside Down too, and Eddie is comfortable with this larger, well-padded version of himself. Steve’s kisses work their way gently down to his pecs, sucking one nipple into his hot, hungry mouth while teasing at the other with his fingers, cupping what could just about be called a tit in one hand—and it barely fits. One of Steve’s legs is draped over and shoved between Eddie’s, pressing against the one place he isn’t soft these days, and Eddie’s mouth is free as a bird to spout off whatever suggestive, pleading filth he wants. 

Except he doesn’t, because they’re not dating and Steve isn’t his and he doesn’t know where the line is, doesn’t know where he’d have to stop and self-control isn’t exactly in his repertoire these days or he wouldn’t be not-making-out with Steve fucking Harrington. Eddie is far from silent though, letting out moans and gasps and pleading little whines, wordless but clearly saying keep going, keep doing that, never stop. And Steve, day after day, lazy afternoon after lazy afternoon, keeps obliging him. What had started as helpful belly rubs after a big meal has somehow evolved into this, and Eddie would be lying if he said that isn’t part of why he’s really been packing it on lately, because he’s a weak, weak man and it all feels so good. Feels so good to have Steve in any capacity, touching him, taking care of him, being so sweet and perfect and Steve. 

So they don’t talk while they do things like this, and they don’t talk about it after, and it’s all fine because they’re not dating and Eddie can be content, he can be, with this arrangement. 

Steve's lips are wet with spit and trailing down his chest now, scooting down on the couch, wriggling out and pressing Eddie more onto his back so he can drape over him fully, and it’s good. All the way down to where his shorts are unbuttoned—because that’s all it takes to set this off now, is Eddie reaching down to make himself a little more comfortable, and then Steve is on him—and nipping at where his belly starts to pooch out into a roll, gripping his thighs, sliding one hand up to grip him through the denim, and…

Something in Eddie’s head (or maybe his heart) snaps. It’s not fine. It’s undefined, it’s the elephant in the room, it’s nothing because they’ve never even tried to put a name to it, just shoved it in a corner and pretended it wasn’t there. And Eddie is sick and fucking tired of pretending. He almost died in March and life is too short to wallow in something he wants but can’t ever have, never moving on because there’s some comfort in the suggestion of having Steve like this, at least, but the comfort is ultimately hollow because, at the end of the day, he doesn’t have anything. 

He reaches down, slides his fingers into Steve’s luxurious hair, and pulls. Just enough to get the guy’s attention away from tongue-fucking his belly button—Jesus H. Christ—and is only a little surprised when the tug elicits a moan. “Steve,” he tries roughly, and has to stop to clear his throat. “What are we doing?”

Never before has he seen Steve Harrington look so caught out. And Eddie had been there the day Steve had been caught making out with a cheerleader under the bleachers when he should have been leading the basketball team out into the school gym during a rally. 

“I, uh.” His face is beet red, and maybe he wants to run but he can’t exactly go anywhere when Eddie has him by the roots. “I was just…”

When he doesn’t continue, Eddie sighs and shakes his head, letting go. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He’s trying so hard to pretend that this isn’t devastating, this yanking the plug that he should have pulled a long time ago before his heart filled up with it, and in its absence he’ll have nothing. Not even a friend, probably, because that’s what happens when you let yourself become some straight guy’s experiment. “I don’t want ‘just,’ Harrington, so… I think I’m gonna go.”

Steve is still hovering over him, frozen, but Eddie wriggles out until he can rock into a sitting position and starts to wedge himself back into his shorts—a difficult task, embarrassingly more because his dick has yet to get with the new program than anything else. 

“I,” Steve tries again weakly, but Eddie doesn’t even pause in his efforts to button back up. Forget the zipper, he’s just glad he didn’t wear a cropped shirt today and can let it hang down to cover himself, which… sort of works. It’ll get him back to his van, at least. 

“It’s fine,” he says, standing up without looking at Steve. “Just, next time there’s a movie night or something, be specific with the kids about whether or not you want me to come or they’ll invite me anyway. Wouldn’t want that surprise with all the witnesses, right? And if we do run into each other, I’ll take my cues from you on how to… handle it.” 

As he says all this, he’s gathering up his stuff. It’s not much, a couple of notebooks and his lunchbox, which he’d brought over for their hangout smoke session… Really just code for ending up with an excuse to fool around. Nothing more than that, though. Steve has never even kissed him on the mouth.

Then he’s out of there, all his shit dumped haphazardly in the empty passenger seat and driving home, and Steve hadn’t even tried to stop him. He wonders if the guy is still crouched on his couch, looking shell shocked with his lips kissed red and a tent in his tiny basketball shorts. Wonders if that’s the last time he’ll ever see Steve, if that image is the one that’s going to follow him around for the rest of his life or if it’ll end up being something worse. Maybe he should move. That had always been the plan, blow this popsicle stand the second he got his diploma, but he’d stayed…

Well. He’d stayed for Steve, but he has to wonder now that the point of that was ever supposed to be, because.

It’s not like they’re dating.

now with a part 2, part 3, parts 4 & 5, part 6, part 7, part 8 - also on ao3

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

Trying to start a giant-ass meta on why I ship Mycroft/Albert and what there is to see of it and right off the bat I'm like...I want people to look at every single panel of their interactions.

No, it's not Sherliam levels. And BIG OLD DISCLAIMER: very little of what I'm going to present here is like "We were clearly intended to read it this way." I'll always argue that Sherliam is meant to be romantic: it hits so many well-established notes and tropes it's almost impossible to think otherwise. MycAl is a bit different. I do think it's definitely like...we're welcome and even invited to see it. But a LOT of my shipping it comes from the way I personally read and interpret things. So this is about explaining what I'm seeing that makes me ship it, rather than trying to be like "This is canon and you should agree with me." Anyway, for reference, I'll be using the official translation as far as it goes and then swapping to teawaffles' wonderful translation for the rest!

So...like right off the bat throughout the entirety of their Chapter 4 interactions their body language and expressions and ways of talking are so flirty? (Also, I still find it funny that in the manga Mycroft is introduced before Sherlock and thus Mycal is introduced before Sherliam. Older bros first lol.)

Maybe it's just that 2 decades on the internet have skewed me towards reading suggestiveness into everything, but the way Mycroft addresses Albert feels so flirtatious even if he's literally just being normal. "And what would an Indian Army official such as yourself want from an intelligence official such as myself this late in the evening?" Like...am I crazy? Does that not kinda sound like a porn intro? 😂 (This could also be Sherliam Side-effects. The way they call each other Professor and Detective in That One Scene is like...almost undeniably foreplay. Now every time anyone calls each other by title/profession/rank is this series I assume they're hitting on each other.)

But also Albert is just so...handsy throughout that scene. He's touching Mycroft's knickknacks, and just sort of limp-wristing all over the place. And I mean, I think that's just one of Albert's public-facing personas (customer service peeps, you know what's up) but it definitely lends itself to the existence of Vibes.

Anyway, there's this parallel of "You have my attention. What do you want?" that I think is kinda neat. (But look how comparatively sad Mycroft looks in the second version!!!)

Chapter 4:

Chapter 23:

Btw, in Scandal in the British Empire...why does Mycroft introduce himself to the Queen? Never mind, not why we're here. Again, my weird innuendo sensors perk up in Chapter 17 at "I did not drag you out of bed this early for nothing." Maybe it's because my perception of Victorian niceties, whether it's factual or not, is that there was this sense of avoiding talk of physical realities. We don't speak of pregnancy, we speak of "her condition" and "confinement." We don't "go to bed," we "retire." And so on. So conversely, it feels almost suggestive to even acknowledge that someone was in bed. In whatever state of undress the might imply. *Kellen Goff Sasaki voice:* OOOH how sCanDaLOus. (Mind you I DON'T believe there is anything of authorial intent in this, again, just trying to explain the factors that make me read things a certain way.)

The little mind games: Albert immediately recognizing that he's being tested, and Mycroft well aware that something is off, that he and Albert are using each other to their own ends. All juicy ship ingredients.

Then there's this...I can't articulate why it's important. But it is. Something about mouths and thoughts. If I wasn't terribly lazy, I'd go digging for examples in various manga series and I have a pretty firm suspicion that I could prove that, often, Mouth-Focus Thinking Panel + Name = Ship.

Jumping forward to the start of The Riot in New Scotland Yard (Chapter 29), Mycroft's demeanour has really changed. During the meeting at the British Museum he's radiating "I'm not angry I'm just disappointed" energy. He's tense, he's not sure if the Moriartys are enemies and when he understands their plan he seems understandably sad about it even as he accepts it. But now, he's radiating an almost Sherlock-like excitement. He's just gotten to see a miniature version of The Plan in action during the Jack the Ripper case, and it worked. He says he's just visiting Albert as an acquaintance (read: friend in Mycroftian), and that's what it feels like. They're chummy. It's cute. Also Albert teasing Mycroft over his squabbles with Sherlock when he leaves? When did Albert find out about that, hmm? (I mean, could be spying of course. But I like to think it just suggests they've talked more than we've seen.)

Annnnnd....cutting this part off here because I'm bored of it for now and it's long. I'll do the rest when the mood strikes. 😂