#and some polos next to hawaiian shirts

[impulsivesuperrobin]

went to walmart today and the entire men’s section was very losers club coded (i have severe brain rot)

[simpforboys]

daddy’s money

rafe cameron x fem!pogue!reader

summary: rafe overhears someone being rude to you at your job. it doesn’t end well for either of you, but rafe tries to make up for it.

warnings: arguing, violence (a punch is thrown), protective!rafe, sugar daddy!rafe (?!??), fluff, reader can speak spanish (but race or anything isn't described), not proof read

these are based on my personal experiences (love working retail), just minus the punching

the ring of the bell made your ears perk up as you folded clothes.

you began working at amor, a popular clothing shop for kooks of all ages about a year ago. why they hired you, a pogue, was beyond you, but nonetheless you appreciated it.

especially since your manager, kat, loved you, as she came from rags and rising to riches.

you loved your job, being able to wear casual dresses and clothes, as half the store was beachy clothes and the other half was fancier.

“is that y/n l/n?”

you turned your head to see rafe cameron, kook prince. you hadn’t seen him in awhile, his hair now buzzed as he walked with the same prideful look.

you grinned, putting the shirt you were folding onto the table before hugging the tall man.

you and rafe had a thing, as one day he came into the shop you two immediately hit it off.

“did you find everything okay?” you asked, trying not to stare at the attractive man in front of you.

you scanned the shorts and polo shirts he was buying, noticing him smiling down at you. his hair was pushed back with a baseball cap on his head.

“i did now,” he said slyly.

“oh yeah?” you grinned, taking the security tags off the clothes. a heat rose to your cheeks as you bagged his items.

“didn’t realize they had pretty girls working here, y/n.” the man read your name tag.

“i wouldn't say that..." you trailed off, not knowing the man's name.

"rafe, rafe cameron." a cameron, huh? it had shocked you, really. the camerons were all over the news and basically ran figure eight.

"your total is going to be $259.73." you couldn't help but peek as he pulled out his wallet, his gold card practically dissing you as he put it in the pinpad.

you handed him his receipt, feeling electricity as you two accidentally brushed hands. he smiled down at you, grabbing his bag.

"i'll see you around, y/n."

"have a good day, rafe."

you watched as he exited the building, but quickly turned around after he paused. you furrowed your brows as he walked back up to the register.

"can i take you out?"

the rest of the story turned around, but you still kept in touch with rafe until he was on the ship with his father. he never texted or called you back after that.

"thanks for answering me." you said sarcastically, trying to hide your beaming smile. even though you hadn't heard from him, you still missed talking and being around him.

"sorry, mama. things got tough."

rafe's eyes wandered your body. from the way your hair was styled, your shorts that displayed your pretty legs, cropped tank top that showed some cleavage with a hawaiian shirt over it to make it seem a bit more modest, although failing to do so.

"i bet, being a cameron isn't so easy, huh?" you teased, continuing to fold the shirts you had previously ditched.

rafe didn't get to respond before kat came over, cutting off your conversation. "y/n, hay un cliente (there is a customer)."

kat was a very strong person. her family had come from mexico in search of a new life, and kat had quickly picked up the pace as she was able to open up amor. the store allowed her family to move from the cut to figure eight. she was around 5'6, brown hair that looked black in some lighting, with a mole next to her top lip that just added to herself, in a weird way.

"lo veo (i see him)." working at amor, you quickly picked up on spanish (unless you already speak it). kat eyed rafe, before nodding at him and heading back to the fitting room.

"did you find everything okay?" you questioned the man. he was around 40, dressed in a collared shirt with jeans to match. he had a rolex on his wrist, displaying his wealth.

rafe had moved to look at some of the mannequins, staying close by.

the man didn't respond, scrolling on his phone. you pursed your lips together, biting back your tongue as you continued to scan his items. his body language seemed defensive as he stood away from you.

"i like your-"

unfortunately, working customer service you had some rude customers from time to time, especially being a pogue in kook territory.

"just zip it pogue and bag my clothes. and don't try anything suspicious, either."

you were taken aback by his comment.

"don't talk to her like that." rafe had appeared next to the register, his nostrils flaring as his normal blue eyes turned dark. his pupils were blown wide as he stared at the man like he was going to kill him.

"and who are you?" the man scoffed.

"she's just doing her job, dickhead."

"if she was just doing her job, she wouldn't be tryna talk to me. now, who are you? do you even work here?" the man eyed rafe angrily, trying to appear more dominate but ultimately failed. rafe was taller and seemed to be much stronger.

"rafe-" you tried.

"rafe cameron, is that right?" the man suddenly smirked, sizing rafe up.

"i should've known. all camerons are dicks, especially your father."

you saw how rafe clenched his fist, the veins in his hand looking like they were on the verge of exploding.

"but i never expected a cameron to be protecting a pogue, or less a whore."

you gasped as rafe's knuckles made contact with the man's cheek, a cracking sound that could be heard around the store.

"rafe!" you shouted as he shook his hand, trying to not beat the man to unconsciousness.

rafe saw red as he grabbed the man by his collar, dragging him out of the store. "never fucking come back, got that?"

the man, now with a bruised cheek that appeared to have a broken bone, quickly walked off. rafe spit on the floor, walking back into the store.

kat had come running over, the noise causing her to be alerted.

"y/n, what the hell was that?" she asked, her voice thick with an accent as she was fuming.

"he was being-"

"we have a no violence policy. i told you to stay away from that cabrón (asshole)." kat swore.

"kat-" the woman wasn't letting you finish.

"you know i love you, kid. but that was unacceptable."

your lip trembled as your heart sank. you knew what her next words were going to be.

"you're fired, and i want rafe out of the store permanently."

rafe watched the scene, opening his mouth to speak but quickly stopped himself. a tear ran down your cheek as you wiped it away.

"who needs this stupid job away," you mumbled. you grabbed rafe's bicep, guiding him out of the store.

once outside, you let go of him and slightly pushed him backwards. rafe stared at you in shock, his knuckles throbbing in pain.

"what was that for?"

"you got me fired, asshole!"

"you just let dickheads speak to you like that?" rafe asked, an appalled tone in his voice as his mouth slightly hung open.

"yes! i need money, i don't care what gross rich men say."

the north carolina heat radiated off of you two, seagulls squawking as they flew above.

"y/n-" he went to grab your hands but you pulled away.

"i don't have daddy's money to support me, rafe. you just cost me my entire income and home."

your words were harsh as you stared directly into his eyes, a flame ignited in you that he lit.

"listen, okay. i can take care of you."

rafe was trying to remain calm, not wanting to scare you away from him if he raised his voice too much.

"oh, yeah? how?"

"c'mon." rafe took you down to where barry was sitting in rafe's car. the man got out as he saw you and rafe approach, the tension thick.

"long time, y/n." barry nodded his head at you, which you pursed your lips in response and watched as rafe popped the trunk.

inside were cases as rafe opened one, shiny gold beaming off the sun to peek at you. your stomach dropped, looking between rafe and barry who had huge smirks on their faces.

"how did you-"

rafe carefully handed you a piece of gold, watching as you inspected it.

"each one is worth at least 20 grand. we're set for life with these, baby."

you let out a surprised laugh, any feel of anger going away from the sight of all the cases filled with your new riches.

"no bullshit, right?"

"100 percent real, honey. rafe melted it down himself."

rafe gave barry a death glare from the nickname he called you.

"how- where- you know what, never mind. i don't care. you guys are fucking loaded."

"we're loaded, y/n." rafe put his arm around you, bringing you into a side hug as you smelt his dior sauvage cologne.

you grinned, feeling rafe press a kiss to your temple as you hugged him tightly. you ran your hand up and down his muscular back as his hand went down to your lower back.

"so.... are you my sugar daddies?" you joked. barry laughed as rafe rolled his eyes.

"c'mon, country club. we got clients to see."

[roostersbby69]

Girl of my dreams

Warnings: None

Summary: Phoenix feels bad that Bradley has to spend his 30s by himself so she sets him up on a speed dating night at a local bar. Bradley was angry at first but maybe a certain girl who is also looking for love changes his mind.

“Hey, Rooster! The usual?” Penny asked him.

“You got it.” He winked and set his elbows on the bar top and waited for her to open the bottle for him.

“Hey, Natasha’s got something for you.” She said while she slid him the beer.

“For me?” He asked confused. “Last time she “had something for me” it was a dart to my ass.”

She nodded and patted the bar top before taking someone else’s order.

Bradley raised an eyebrow before grabbing the bottle and making his way towards his best friend.

“Hey! Bradley!” She patted him on the shoulder when he found her.

“Long time no see.” He smiled.

“Right on time!” She laughed.

“What?” He asked before taking his first sip of the beer.

She slid her hand from his shoulder and played with the pool stick in front of her, “Uh, look. Don’t get mad! But I kind of set you up on a speed dating night that starts in twenty minutes.” She smiled innocently.

Bradley stood there and stared at her with no expression, “You what?”

“Yeah,” She laughed, “look it’ll do you some good! Maybe you’ll find the one!” She shrugged.

“Natasha, I’m not going to a stupid speed dating night. I’m thirty six years old, i’m not in college.” He shook his head.

“Come on, Bradley! Look let’s make a deal, if I’m wrong, i’ll buy you a round next week. But if i’m right then you’ll marry the love of your life.” She stated simply.

“No, Natasha.”

“Bradley.”

“No.”

“Come on!”

“No.”

“Bradley, you need to get out there!”

“No!”

“Bradshaw, I paid $20 for this!”

“Okay, Fine!” He flailed his arms. “Happy?”

She squealed, “yes! Ok, so it’s at Club Ruz bar in fifteen minutes. You better hurry! And tell me how it goes!”

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

Bradley walked out of the Hard Deck and made his way to the bronco before starting the engine and typing the address in his phone and speeding off.

The bar was a fancier bar than the Hard Deck. It was more of a jazz kind of bar, not really Bradley’s cup of tea.

He parked and saw a man greeting people inside with a clipboard, it seemed he was checking people’s names off as they entered.

He rolled his eyes and got out of the car before locking it and groaning as he walked towards the front.

“Hi there! I’m Mark!” The man said as Bradley got to the door, “are you here for tonight’s speed dating?”

Bradley took a deep breath,“unfortunately.” he sighed.

“Great! What’s your name?”

“Bradley Bradshaw.”

“Yep I see you! Come on in!” The guy stepped aside for Bradley to enter.

He saw many men in Ralph Lauren polos and khaki pants with loafers. He looked down at himself and saw his hawaiian shirt with jeans and boots. He looked back up and watched as they laughed about something probably about politics or golfing.

The guy that greeted him at the door walked inside and clapped his hands.

“Okay everyone! We’re going to get started so here’s what’s going to happen. Each one of the guys will get a sheet of paper with each of the ladies names on it and beside them there will be a ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ check box. Check it off as you and the ladies chat. Let’s get started!”

A woman handed Bradley a sheet of paper as he scanned the names.

Rachel

Naomi

Emily

Katherine

Y/n

‘That was a pretty name.’ Bradley thought.

Susan

Millie

Natalie

“Okay, Boys! The ladies will be sat at their own table and you’ll get three minutes with each then when we say switch you’ll rotate to the next girl!”

Bradley walked to a nearby table and saw a pale woman with dark black hair. She reminded him of a witch.

He slowly sat down as other men took their seats.

“Hi, I’m Bradley.” He introduced himself.

“Naomi.” She twirled her hair.

Bradley noticed her long fingernails that got caught in some strands of hair as she twirled it around and around. He shuddered. He could smell that she smelt like, what was it? Cat piss?

No. He marked.

Bradley yawned as she went on about her cats and her beliefs on ghosts. His eyes scanned the room until they landed on a young woman, maybe early thirties, long hair, beautiful posture, pink glossed lips, and was dressed to his liking. It was like he hit the jackpot. It reminded him of that scene from 101 dalmatians when Pongo was trying to find the perfect dog and woman in the beginning of the movie.

He smiled to himself as he watched her cross her legs and swing her feet softly.

“Times up! Switch!” The man yelled. And Bradley couldn’t be happier, he didn’t even say goodbye to… what was her name again?

He bolted up and sat down with the next woman as he watched another man sit across from the girl.

“Hi! I’m Rachel!” The girl in front of him beamed.

“Bradley.” He shook her hand.

“You’ve got big arms, why are you wearing that floral shirt? I love your mustache.” She rambled.

“Mhm.” Bradley hummed as he marked another ‘No’ on the paper beside her name.

One more person until he got to talk to her.

“Where do you live?” Rachel asked as she leaned her face in front of Bradley as he was gazing at the mystery girl.

“Blue.” He said, zoned out.

“Huh?”

“Sorry, what did you ask?” Bradley looked at her.

“Switch!”

He got up and sat down quickly by the next girl and watched the girl as she smiled at the man who was sitting down across from her.

“Hi, i’m Bradley.” he introduced himself.

“Susan.” She pulled out her phone and opened it to reapply her lip gloss in the camera.

She wasn’t a talker, Bradley sat there doodling on the paper until the guy yelled for them to switch.

Bradley got up quickly and approached her as she was checking off a box on her sheet. She set her pink pen down and looked up at him as he pulled out the chair and sat down.

“Hi.” She smiled.

“Hey, I’m Bradley.” He stuck out his hand.

“I like that name, i’m Y/n.” She stuck hers out and shook his. Her hands were soft, and small.

She smelled like sweet vanilla and her teeth were perfect against her pink, glossy lips.

“So, what do you do for work?” She asked him.

“I’m a Naval Aviator.”

“Nice! Im a jet mechanic. Pretty boring when placed next to yours.” She laughed.

“That’s perfect.” He mumbled as he stared at her dreamily.

“I’m sorry?” She looked up at him.

“I mean, that’s just as perfect as my job.” He corrected himself.

“Are you stationed here?” She asked.

Man she was a looker.

“Yeah. For the time being. I’ve got a little house not too far from here.”

“That’s nice, I live in Miramar.” She nodded.

“Me too. Do you have any family there?” He asked.

“No, i’ve got a couple friends that I call family but my family lives in a different state.” She explained.

“We’re on the same page.” He put two check marks in her ‘Yes’ box.

“I like your shirt, Bradley.” She reached out and ran a finger along a flower.

“You know some women don’t like it.” He laughed.

“I’m not some women.” She raised an eyebrow and smirked.

“Clearly.” He smiled.

“What’s your callsign?” She asked.

She’s perfect, “Rooster.”

“Rooster,” she repeated, “I’ve never heard that one before.”

“Got it after my Dad.”

“Your dad is an aviator too?”

“Was, but yeah.” He corrected her.

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” She apologized.

“Don’t be, he was a hero.” He smiled at the memory of him.

“I like you, Bradley.” She smiled.

“I like you, Y/n.” He smiled back.

“How about I give you my number?” She grabbed her pink pen and scribbled on his sheet.

“I’d love that.” He watched her neat handwriting write her number down.

“Switch!”

“It was nice meeting you, Rooster.” She smiled and held her hand out.

“It was amazing meeting you too. I’ll talk to you later.” He gazed at her and tripped over the leg of the table as he walked to the next girl.

“Hey, man, move it.” The next guy sat down in the seat as Y/n giggled at Bradley’s lovesick face.

He sat down at the next girl and sighed dreamily.

He was definitely texting her tonight.

He didn’t even pay attention to the next girl as he whipped his phone out.

Bradley: You were right.

Phoenix: I TOLD YOU SO!

Bradley: Want to be my best man?

_____________________________________

Yay!!!!

Outfit: (Made by me)

[lefaystrent]

One random day, Patton declares he is going on vacation. He will be leaving the mindscape for awhile, and it's up to the rest of the gang to hold down the fort while he's gone.

"You're Thomas's sense of Morality; you can't just go on vacation," Logan points out.

Patton's grin goes a little too wide, his eyes a little too intense. "Watch me."

Remus bobs his head up and down to check him out. "Since when do you do the ominous thing? I thought that was my thing. Are we playing around with each other's thingies?"

"No–thing wrong with switching things up now and then," Patton says cheerfully.

Virgil squints. "Are you Deceit in disguise?"

"I am sitting right next to you, Virgil," Janus points out. "Also, I wouldn't be caught dead in a floral print."

"Are you going to Hawaii? Without me?!" Roman demands, eyeing Patton's– well, Hawaiian shirt he's donned on rather than his usual polo.

"Now, now Roman, this is nothing personal kiddo. I'm just taking some much needed me-time. So I'll need to take this journey alone."

"Oh thank God," Janus mutters while Logan blinks rapidly, flabbergasted. Logan spits out, "We are all personified pieces of one man's personality. By the nature of our existence, you can't be alone."

"That's quitter talk," Remus butts in. He literally turns and shows them his butt for some reason, though thankfully with pants still on. "Want me to yeet you out the door, Daddy-o? See how far you can go? Or maybe load you into a ballista and send you hurtling to a beautiful bludgeoning death?"

"No thanks, bud," Patton says far too good-naturedly. "Our dear lord in Heaven gave me two perfectly good legs to walk with. I think I'll be fine."

"You're serious? Just– what, gonna walk out the door?" Virgil questions sharply. Skeptical he may be, he seems somewhat interested in seeing how far Patton will take this bit.

"Absolutely! There's a whole big wide world out there! So much to do! So much to see!"

"So what's wrong with taking the back steets," both Remus and Roman sing at the same time.

"You guys will be fine for a while without me. But just in case you miss me, I have provided each of you with your very own Patton Pal."

They each look down into their hands where a small, stuffed version of Patton materializes. It has stitched in glasses, a removable Cardigan, and its mouth is in the shape of a heart.

"What," they all respond collectively.

"If you feel lonely or need a hug, you just give your Patton Pal there a good ole squeeze! That should tide you over until I get back. Anyways, I'm gonna skeddadle now. Bye! Love you!"

And Patton walks out the front door.

Dad has left the building.

Roman ponders with pursed lips, "Sooo, did we just get abandoned?"

"Nah, I'm sure he's just gone out to pick up some milk."

"Thank you, Remus."

Virgil rises up from the couch and strides over to the door in a huff. "Alright Pat, you can come out now."

The door swings open. A brick wall is revealed where there once was not one.

"Uhhh, guys?" Virgil asks the group, stepping back. Unconsciously, he grips his Patton Pal a little tighter.

"What in the Chris Angel Mindfreak?" Remus questions and taps at the brick. His nail makes a scraping sound along the mortar. Curious, he examines his finger and licks it.

"Did he trap us in the Mindscape?" Roman asks, squeezing in between his brother to test the solidity of the wall. It is indeed a wall.

"Is this his villain origin story?"

Janus rolls his eyes at the twins. "Patton's just serious for a change, that's all. He doesn't want to be followed, and obviously he must be out hanging with Thomas. Really now, have some sense."

"You do know who you're talking to, right?" Virgil asks him waving at the twins, to which Janus gives a saucy, "Touche."

Logan sighs and begins ascending the stairs.

"What, you're just gonna leave too?" Virgil calls after him.

"I have work to do, as I'm sure the rest of you do. Patton will return once he tires of this stunt."

Logan is gone and now it's just the four of them.

"Someone's salty about being abandoned," Roman comments too loudly.

"FALSEHOOD!"

"Alllll byyyyy myseeeelffff," Remus sings off-key.

Virgil debates whether to follow Logan up or try a window next. He stares down into the beady, button eyes of his Patton Pal doll.

"Need a hug?" Janus asks him teasingly, watching him.

Virgil scoffs and shoves the plush into his hoodie pocket. It's bulky, but it fits.

Will it stay there?

Will Patton ever return?

Will the sides use this time to overcome their differences and bond as a true family?

Find out next time on "Episodes From The Mindscape"!

The screen flicks off.

[kittykatthatbitesback]

Hazbin Hotel Beach Trip! Headcanons ;)

Characters: Charlie, Vaggie, Alastor, Angeldust, Husk, Sir Pentious, Vox, Lucifer, Adam, and Cherri Bomb

A/N: Y'all guess who's already ready for summer to start? These are gonna be my first headcanons, I had so much fun creating them, enjoy <3

Charlie 🐐🫶

The optimistic Princess of Hell loooves going to the beach

Growing up in the sweltering armpit of Hell has caused her to love the heat, but also crave the refreshing coolness of the salty ocean

Has so much fun slashing in the waves and dragging a resistant Vaggie into the water with her

“Come on Vaggie, it will be so FUUNNNNN, ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh”

Brings all sorts of fun toys and trinkets to play with at the beach

Volleyball, beachball, speaker, sand castle buckets and shovels, floaties, and a surf board

Is currently struggling to learn how to surf, but is determined to get good at it

Wears the most extravagant, tropical, neon pink swimsuit

Would definitely start an epic game of Marco Polo with the others

Her competitive nature would cause the game to escalate quickly into a war-like battle

Will be in a good mood for the next couple of days because she is so grateful that she can go to the beach with her friends and experience this mini vacation

Vaggie ❌🥀

Vaggie is very much like a cat in water, she is practically hydrophobic

Has a thick layer of sunscreen, the largest sunglasses and sun hat, and will only stay underneath an umbrella

Stands in the sand with her arms cross refusing to get even a drop of water on her

Is wearing one of those scuba gear under suits, all black stretching down her arms and legs so that if water does get on her it doesn’t actually touch her skin

If someone tries to drag her into the ocean, the ex-angel grounds her feet into the sand, taking a battle stance, and threatens to gouge out their eyes

Unlessss it’s Charlie

For Charlie she will do anything

Despite her disdain for the water, watching Charlie have fun splashing in the waves causes a slight smile to form on her face, cracking her previous resting bitch face

Will go as far as to build sand castles and catch tiny crabs for Charlie so that she can please her

Tries helping her learn how to surf but is also is terrible at it

Alastor 🦌📻

Alastor originally said he wasn’t going to go on this beach trip, yet somehow was found already lying on a beach chair by the time everyone arrived at the beach

Is wearing a Hawaiian T-shirt and red trunks

Brought a mini radio to drown out Charlie’s obnoxiously loud speaker, although ends up being isolated since no one else wants to listen to his old-time corny jazz music

Even though it’s lowkey a vibe

Actually prefers to have this new 50 feet radius of isolation, although Vox sometimes will sneak up on him to kick sand at him

Goes full on Radio Demon mode causing Vox to freeze in fear and slowly back up back to the rest of the group

Doesn’t go into the water and instead spends his time sunbathing to brainstorm evil masterplans like taking over Hell and ruining Vox’s life

Will send his shadows to go check up on the others’ beach adventures but will stick to himself

Also uses this time to practice his singing, specifically to the song “We’ll Meet Again”

Angeldust 🕷️❤️‍🔥

Definitely is using his relaxation time to show off his new, sexy, hot pink thong

Is matching with Cherri and they’re serving cunt

Lies down on the towel in promiscuous poses to catch a certain grey cat’s eyes

Dances and makes choreographies with Cherri and Nifty to Charlie’s music

Snuck alcohol and drugs in that Charlie had to take away for the sake of “One normal vacation trip!”

“Aw come awn Charlie, a little fun never hurt no one”

Charlie does not buy this and refuses to let Angel turn this beach trip into something else

Walks along the beach shore to flirt with other beach goers and ends being a cheerleader for some hot hunks playing volleyball

Is dragged back to Charlie and the others by a very annoyed Husk

Husk 🐈‍⬛🍸

Being a cat, obviously is not a huge fan of the water

Really only went for the company of a certain spider

Keeps his eye on him underneath his dark sunglasses, making sure Angeldust doesn’t get into some serious trouble

Was the one who helped Angeldust sneak the alcohol in and argues with Charlie that she can’t take away the alcohol because it’s his

“Charlie I swear to Satan, you better not throw away my supply of alcohol that’s for the hotel” “Then why would you bring it here?” Husk is left dumbfounded and ends up chugging it all down ignoring Charlie’s protests

Drunk Husk tries to play volleyball with the others, ends up stumbling around and falls into the sand after being hit in the face with the ball

Drunk Husk also exposes his jealous nature and after he sees Angel flirting with the hunks he stomps over to drag a whiney Angel back

Sir Pentious 🐍🥚

Treats this trip as if it was a super important team mission, checking up constantly on the others and not resting until everything is perfect

Came to the beach in his blue soldier blazer and refuses to take it off even when swimming in case “a violent battle commences!”

Being a cold-blooded reptile, he ends up sunbathing for hours straight up raw: no sunscreen, no sunglasses, no umbrella or tent, bro is NOT afraid of a little sun

But is very much afraid of his Egg Bois boiling in the sun so as a precaution prior to the trip he engineered a clear cooler to fill with cold water that can drive around the beach kind of like a space rover

“My neeeeww invention called the Ultimate 360 Beach Sssimulator! allowsss for my Egg Boiss to sssee through the plexiglass walls and ssee their ssurroundings while sstimulating the wavessss of the ocean with cold water and hydro jetss! As well, there isss a waterproof joystick inside sso that they may maneuver wherever they pleasse!” “Thanks boss! I feel so relaxed and refreshed!” “Anything for my preciousss babiesss”

Can rest now that his Egg Bois are guaranteed to not cook in the sun

Being a snake he thinks it’s fun to pretend to be an electric eel and play pranks on the others

Specifically on Cherri

Until she decides to absolutely obliterate him and stomped on him slithering through the water

It hurt but he lowkey was into it 😉

Vox ⚡️📺

The beach is not exactly Vox’s thing, and no one understand why he tagged along on this beach trip

Being an actual TV, he begins to overheat and his screen starts glitching and flashing random colors  (uh oh the TV’s buffering!)

He also can’t be in the water… because he is a LITERAL TV

This is the one time he feels insecure about himself because he is unable to do practically anything at the beach

Put on sunscreen? No, that would mess up his hardwire. Build sandcastles? No, the sand would clog up his cracks. Play volleyball? No, the ball might crack his screen.

At least he looked good, he specifically bought holographic trunks, although he only wore them for 20 minutes because had to leave early

Was so glad to be back in air conditioning and far away from any large body of water

Lucifer 🪽🐤

The King of Hell acts like the most stereotypical tourist at this tropical beach, my god

Is of course wearing a bright red and orange Hawaiian t-shirt with a pink lei hanging around his neck, and came with a digital camera to take photos of the whole experience

“We’re going to remember this forever! Everyone say Satan!” 📸

Brought a bunch of his rubber duckies to float with him in the ocean

This white as hell angel needs a whole three inch layer of sunscreen all over his body, and brought a whole ass tent which he magically set up in a flash with his “pure angelic poweeer”

Was the most excited to go on this trip and is already freaking out over the fact that there’s a snow cone truck by the shore

“I want to get a large one with Tiger’s Blood and watermelon syrup and—oh Charlie, look, they have a piña colada flavor too!”

It’s obvious Charlie gets her optimism from her father

Is running around the beach trying to do everything he could in the time that they had

Adam 🎸🤘

The first man is definitely living out his hot dilf summer

Brought beer and ends up hanging out with those hunks Angeldust was flirting with earlier

Has a cap on backwards, sunglasses, typical frat guy look, but is honestly looking pretty rad

Blaring rock from his boombox he dragged all the way to the beach

“LET’S PARTYYY!! WOOHOOOO”

Brought some fishing lines as well to catch fish with his fellow “bros” just for him to slack off and accidently have his line get snatched into the ocean by some strong fish

Could care less and is only here for a good time

Cherri Bomb 🍒💣

The bad ass Aussie sure knows how to have some fun at a beach

Has lots of practice back in Australia surfing, so is obviously a boss at this and throws her bombs in the ocean to create the most massive waves to ride on

Literally so cool, although she ends up nearly drowning everyone and it was at this point that Vox decided to leave

Is matching with Angeldust with her hot pink cunty bikini

Helped sneak in Angel’s flasks and stashed some drugs by hiding them inside her swimsuit bra

Is crazy energetic, has so much energy throughout this entire trip, that even afterwards on the car ride home she is belting songs at the top of her lungs

Yet when they arrive back at the hotel she is the first to pass out on the sofa

[yeslisastaple-blog]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: BOYS CLOTHES BUNDLE AGE 2-3 Years Jeans T-Shirt Top Shorts Jacket LOT.

[sokimyork]

Are Golf Pants Business Casual Paradox: Golf Meets Office

A new tune is emerging in the professional outfit symphony: golf gear. Usually, dress pants and neutral colours would lead the orchestra. Do you consider golf pants for men to be business casual?  Is it audacious of these playful violins to reimagine the informal dress code? Not only is this a sound suggestion, but it also presents an intriguing fashion dilemma. As we begin this discussion of style, one must ask: Are formal settings compatible with the laid-back tempos of a golf course?

Would You Recommend Golf Pants for a Business Casual Occasion?

Now for the million-dollar question: Are golf trousers great for a casual work outfit, or are they better left on the golf course or for tournaments? Like trying to locate your ball in the rough, the answer is somewhat complicated.

Benefits of Wearing Golf Pants on the Job

If you wear golf pants for men, which are made for hours of play, you will be fine for long meetings or desk jobs.

These trousers have a modern style, with neutral colours and cuts that make them look as sharp as any suit or dress shirt.

Their versatility makes them ideal for days when you have to fast-track from a client meeting to a more relaxed situation at the driving range.

The Best Golf Pants for Business Casual

So, you've made the bold decision to wear sports trousers to a business golf outing. Way to go! golf pants for men, though, are not made equivalent. Not everyone is cut out for the golf course, but some can glide into any business without drawing any attention to themselves or making others hide their laughter.

Tips for Choosing the Right Golf Pants

Instead of yelling, "I was on sale at the pro shop," try to choose high-quality materials that mutter "luxury." If your office is a tropical resort, choose lightweight, breathable, fast-drying textiles.

If you're an expert, pick an athletic fit that flatters your shape without restriction. "I'm ready for my golf tournament" is not the desired professional appearance.

Keep to neutral colours, according to colour commentary. While brighter colours may work with your Hawaiian shirt, darker shades of grey, black and navy will help your golf pants blend in with business casual.

How to Personalise Your Golf Pants

Now that you have selected the ideal golf pants for men, it is time to complete your business casual outfit. Having the proper golfing companions is just as crucial as having top-notch apparel.

Complementing the Appropriate Top

The most suitable option for you is a collared shirt. As such, it serves as an intermediary between more informal attire and business attire. Subtle patterns on polo shirts are a fun way to express yourself without crossing over into golf tournament attire, which is perfect for those daring days when you want to stand out.

A sharp dress shirt can take your golf trousers to the next level by adding a more formal touch. Use only classic patterns or neutral colours. Checks and stripes might be flattering, but save the hula hoop top for the beach.

Shoes at the Front!

Elevate your golf pants for men from casual to professional with a pair of dress shoes. Wear brogues or loafers in a shade that complements your slacks.

Put away your golf shoes. Unless your meeting is on the 9th hole, you can leave the golf shoes at home. Spikes in the hall aren't a power move, despite what you might have thought.

Conclusion

As we wrap up this fashionable adventure, golf trousers with women's sleeveless golf shirts, although not often thought of as a go-to item for business casual wear, can really elevate your wardrobe with the correct attitude and style. They are an excellent option for a variety of professional contexts since they combine comfort, style, and versatility.

[randofics]

Seth x southern reader smut

Had this one sitting in my doc's for a few weeks now and I decided to finally post it. Once I saw Seth in the movie dayshift I had to write something with him being the nervous little bean he is.

18+ Under the cut

----------------

Seth was very shy from what you could tell. The first time you met him was when you needed to cash in some vamp teeth. When you walked up to the front desk he was the only one working. When he spotted you his mouth hung open. "You're gonna catch flies with your mouth open darlin." Your southern drawl flowing freely as you spoke. His mouth opened and closed like a fish as he tried to speak. "Um...um...heh...you...you aren't from around here are you?" You grinned at him placing your arms on the counter in front of you. "Now what gave you an idea like that?" "I...um...I didn't mean anything by it I swear!" You giggle at his nervousness. "I'm just yankin yer chain darlin." "Oh...ok...um... you want to cash in some teeth right?"

The next time you saw him was a few days later at a gas station. He said he was going hunting with a guy named Bud. The green short sleeve polo he was wearing looked good on him it made his surprisingly strong looking arms stand out. A tall man wearing a Hawaiian shirt walked out of the gas station and came over to stand next to you. "Who's this Seth?" "This is y/n she's a hunter like you." You hold your hand out to greet him. "It's nice to meet you y/n, I'm Bud." "It's nice to meet you too sir. So you and Seth going hunting here in a little bit huh?" "Yep and you?" "Oh I don't have anything planned today so I figured I'd just sit around the house." Seth interjects excitedly. "You should go with us!" You chuckle at him. "I wouldn't want to interject in yall's whatever you have going on." "NO no you wouldn't be interjecting in anything! Right bud?" Bud gives you a knowing look. "Yeah you should go with us." "Ok I guess I'm tagging along then. Just let me get my stuff and I'll hop in."

You walk to your car with a little more sway in your hips. You're sure you can feel Seth's eyes on you as you walk away.

Bud grins at Seth who's definitely watching as you walk away. "She seems interested in you man." "What! No no no she's-she's not interested in me! I mean look at me I'm skinny and I wear glasses and I pissed my pants the other day out of fear for pete's sake!" Bud rolls his eyes." Look man I saw how she looked at you and she barely even looked at me c-ept for when she said hello to me. That's a big sign if you ask me." Seth looks between you and bud before smiling slightly. "You really think so?" Bud gives him a pat on the shoulder. "Heck yeah man she's totally into you!"

You jog up to them, duffel bag in hand. "Just toss it in the back." Seth steps out of the truck to let you sit in the middle. As you try to move passed him he mirrors your movement accidentally stepping in your way. You chuckle as it happens again and you put your hand on his chest. Finally he presses his back against the door to let you through. Sitting down in the middle you buckle the seat belt over your waist. Seth hopps in after you and his hand grazes your thigh as he goes to buckel his own seat belt. He let's out a quiet sorry to you as he finishes. You chuckle again at his nervousness.

Bud pulls up next to a van and starts talking to the two brothers inside. They make a comment about Seth being a cupcake and he brushes it off saying that he's a big fan. Bud pipes up and agrees that they should team up for this hunt.

You're getting your gear ready when you see bud put a metal plated neck brace on Seth and hand him a pistol. You can't help the snort that escapes your nose when he turns to face you. He frowns at you and you let out a quiet laugh. "I look ridiculous don't I." You move closer to him and hook your finger in the v shape of the brace under his chin pulling on it lightly. "I think you look cute." You flutter your lashes at him and he gets nervous again. Bud interrupts your little moment saying that it's time to get to work.

A few minutes later and your in a living room fighting vamps. One is keeping you busy as you hear Seth yelp when one comes out of a vent. The next thing you know he's on the floor wrestling with it. He calls to Bud for help and you see two shots go through her torso. Finally you kill the vamp that you're fighting and you see one of the twins cut her head off. Seth throws her off him and scrambles to his feet. All of you now standing together breath a sigh of relief. One of the twins speaks up first. "What happened to you? You pissed your pants?" He looks down at himself before answering. "It's kinda my thing." The other twin looks at him in digust. "Bro." Bud eyes him questioningly. "Wachu doin wachu doing man?" "Listen pee pee pants this is man's world not for little boy." You sigh to yourself at the conversation.

Bud gives the twins fist bumps telling them to stay safe and you part ways. Seth and bud drop you off at your car and you give Seth a piece of paper and a kiss on his cheek before you walk to your car. He touches his cheek as Bud drives off. "Congratulations man I told you she was into you." He reached over and slapped him on the back. Seth unfolds the slip of paper to read it. Call me sometime darlin xoxo y/n. He quickly reaches for his phone and adds your number to his contact list. "Do you think I should call her tonight?" "Heck yeah man! Maybe you can get her address."

Later that night you were constantly gazing at your phone to see if he texted or called you and eventually he did. "Hey." "Hey. You both greeted each other nervously. "Do you want to come over darlin?" "YES! I-I mean sure if that's alright with you?" "Yeah I'm not busy with anything tonight so we can just watch a movie or something." "Ok yeah um what's your address?" You can hear a pen click in the background. After you give him your address he says that he'll be there in a bit.

You're looking out the blinds of your apartment when you see a taxi pull up and he hurriedly gets out thanking the driver. You pull the blinds up and wave to him as he walks up the sidewalk. He's wearing another green polo though this one is a bit lighter in color and another pair of tan pants. His bag is slung over his shoulder. When you open the door you greet him with another kiss on the cheek. And he smiles nervously at you. "Just set your bag on that table." You go to sit on the couch as he sets his bag down.

When he turns around you pat the couch for him to come sit. He sits across the couch from you and fiddles with the hem of his shirt. "What do you want to watch darlin?" "I don't know, whatever you want I guess." You scoot over and reach over him to get the remote. Out the corner of your eye you see him looking at a bit of your back that your shirt reveals as it rides up on you. He gulps audibly as a bit of a blush appears on his cheeks. You sit back and flip to the movie you wanted to watch.

About halfway through the movie two characters begin to make out. A blush grew on your face and you looked at Seth out the corner of your eye. His jaw was clenching and there was a blush on his face too. The arm he placed on the back of the couch twitched as his hand fisted the cushion behind you.

You had scooted over more throughout the movie and your knee was touching his thigh. Thoughts about what he might feel like kissing you filled your mind and soon heat was pooling between your legs. You squeezed your thighs together trying to relieve some of the pressure. But it didn't seem to help. You turned to Seth and he turned to look at you as you sat on your knees, your hands pulling on the hem of your shirt. "Seth? Can-can I kiss you?" You looked at him through your lashes. "I-I um...uh...you-you want to-to kiss me?!" You nod your head. "Um...oh...ok yeah you can if-if you want." You lean towards him and place your hand on the side of his face. He's blushing like mad now as you close the distance, your other hand moves to his shoulder and you press your chest against his. Your eyes are half lidded as your lips brush his.

He pushes forward and you fully connect. You start slow, your lips moving in tandem. And slowly the kiss gets heated. His hand goes to your cheek and the other grasps your wrist on his shoulder. He moans against you and you take the chance to slip your tongue in. The move takes him by surprise but he starts to wrestle his tongue with yours. You move to straddle his lap and he jumps at the sudden weight. He separates from you to gulp in air, his glasses are foggy from your breath.

"Woah you're really good at that." You smile at him as you connect your lips again. The hand on your wrist quickly finds its way to your hip. He squeezes the flesh there and you gasp as his thumb digs into a sensitive spot on your abdomen. "You ok? I didn't hurt you did I?" You smile at him and laugh. "No darlin your thumb hit a sensitive patch of skin is all." He looks down at the hand on your hip and runs his thumb over your skin curiously. A shiver runs up your spine when he hits the same spot. "Huh...you know I've never done any of this before. I didn't realize that you could be sensitive in a place like that. Makes me curious about other sensitive spots you have." He gives you a lopsided grin and you feel your core twitch. "Maybe I should try your neck?" A hand on your back pushes you into him and his lips latch onto your neck. Instinctually you tilt your head for him. He starts out gentle, peppering kisses along your skin making you breath faster. Then you feel his tongue go from the v of your collar bones up to your adams apple. A strangled moan escapes your throat and your hands shoot up to his hair. You feel his teeth graze back down your throat his upper lip dragging along your skin. He groans when you tug his hair, the hands that were on your hips are under your shirt running along your spine and across your stomach.

You quiver at his touch. His mouth moves to nip and suck on your pulse and he marks your skin thoroughly. Soon you can't take much more and you grind down on him. He hisses against your skin and frustrated with his glasses leans away from you to take them off. When he looks back at you his eyes widen. You're breathing hard and his marks on your neck are starting to bloom red. Your lips are a bit swollen from kissing him and your eyes are blown with lust and half lidded. "Holy crap." He breaths out astonished. "I-I did that!?" He says to himself still staring at you. You grind down on him to snap him out of it. His hands fly to your hips and he hisses again at your movement.

You lean into him to whisper in his ear. "Seth baby I need you." He curses under his breath at that. "Ok yeah." His hands on your hips move to lift your shirt off of you. You hold your arms up as he lifts it past your chest. He stops though and you can only snort as he stares at your clothed breasts. "Seth." He snaps out of it and removes your shirt, throwing it to the floor. "You're...wow...may I?" You nod and close your eyes as his hands come up to touch you. You sigh at the gentle squeeze he gives you. You moan when his tongue moves through the valley of your chest. "I'm gonna take this off ok?" You humm in affirmation and his hands go to the clasp of your bra.

It takes him a moment to undo the clasp and he slowly pulls it off of you. You watch as he takes in the sight of your bare chest. "You're gorgeous baby." You blush at the compliment and gasp when he starts tending to your cest. You grind down on him again and you don't stop this time. He breaks away from you to toss off his shirt. Pausing for a moment as you admire his body. Your hands trail from his strong shoulders to his pecks and down his abs. You move your hands to run over the v on his abdomen the muscles there twitching under your touch. His eyes watch your hands the whole time. Pride swells in his chest at the realization that you like his body. He thought he was skinny but based on the way you were practically drooling over him convinced him otherwise.

To you his body was perfect. He wasn't too skinny or too muscular. His abs were just big enough for them to show along his stomach. You got up from his lap hurriedly removing the rest of your clothes. His jaw dropped at the sight of you bare to him. He got up and took the rest of his clothes off too. Once he was done you practically jumped him pushing him back onto the couch. Your lips connected with his neck and he cursed again. Wheezy moans escaped his throat as you attacked his skin. His length touched your inner thigh as you straddled him again. You nipped and marked his neck and chest leaving red blotches in your wake.

You leaned away from him and your hands moved down to guide him. The tip of him grazing your entrance as you lined him up. You looked into his eyes as you sunk down. A strangled yell left your throat as you took him in. His hands gripping your hips tightly as you finally sunk all the way. He took it upon himself to move the both of you so you laid back on the couch with him on top of you. You kissed him again as you adjusted to him. Your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms went around his neck.

After a minute his hips pulled back slowly and you buried your face in his neck. He sunk back into you and repeated the movements a few times before moving faster. You began to mewl and moan in his ear which spurred him on. His hips moved faster and connected harder with yours making you arch your back into him. His groans and moans slowly turned into grunts and growls making your core twitch and tighten around him. His teeth suddenly went into your shoulder and you yelled out his name as you tightened even harder around him. His jaw tightened and he let out an animalistic growl low in his chest at the feeling. His breath was quick and it came out in snorts through his nose.

Your eyes rolled in the back of your head at the sounds he made and his sharp thrusts into you. When he re adjusted his jaws grip on your shoulder and lifted your leg hooking his arm under your knee to keep it up. You knew you were done for. Your hands clawed at his back and dug in when the coil in you finally snapped. Your whole body siezed up and your mouth opened in a silent scream. As you squeezed him he finally came undone. His hips met your's one final time as he let go into you.

*********

The next day Bud called Seth asking if he wanted to get lunch with him. "Yeah sure be there in a bit." You had fallen asleep on top of him on the couch and his voice rumbling in his chest woke you. "Hey sleepy you wanna go eat with Bud?" His voice was deeper from sleep. You sat up, the blanket that was covering you slipping down your back. He admired your body as you stretched and yawned. " I'll take that as a yes." You got up and got dressed. He kissed your neck as he held you from behind, his hands sitting on your abdomen. You both got dressed and left for the diner. When you pulled up to the little diner you looked over at Seth, your eyes caught on the hickeys that littered his skin. You reached over and brushed your fingers along his neck. He turned to look at you questioningly when he caught sight of the marks he left on your skin. Pride swelled in his chest at the thought of you being claimed by him. Each mark on your skin telling everyone that you were his now.

You snapped out of your thoughts and hopped out of your car Seth following right behind you. Entering the diner you looked around till you saw Bud waving at you. You grabbed Seth's hand and made your way over to Bud's table. When you sat down you heard Bud's astonished voice. "Woah.. you two have fun last night?" You blushed like mad and held onto Seth's arm. "Well don't leave me hanging here how was it?" You looked at Bud's grinning face. "Good really good." That was all you could say through your embarrassment. Seth nodded his head vigorously in agreement. You reached up and kissed Seth on the cheek instinctually. Nuzzling under his jaw affectionately. "Alright lovebirds let's order some food."

[theloveoftoms]

Can you do Rooster x Hangman?

Gas Station Chicken - rooster x hangman

(very weird title, I know lmao)

Summary: After forgetting to get something for maverick's 60th birthday barbecue, hangman and rooster have no other choice but to stop at good old 7-eleven.

A/N: woah, two stories in one day? Way to go Mackenzie :) I usually do my requests in order, but I got this one tonight and I thought of this cute and funny story idea. I never thought I would write rooster x hangman, but here we are! I had so much fun writing this one, and I hope you enjoy it! Remember, you are loved <3 xoxo - mack :)

For as long as roster and hangman have lived together, the calendar has always hung on the refrigerator. Their calendar, a free one they got at a New Years on-base party, had various portraits of north island, including but not limited to, planes, boats, the ocean, sunset scenes, hot men playing football - and you can imagine the rest.

Every time rooster or hangman would hear of a party or of an event they would mark it down on the calendar so they would be sure to attend. Now most of the time, it was rooster who did the marking-events-down-on-the-calendar bit, and hangman who mentioned them to rooster one night while laying in bed.

The sole purpose of the calendar was to be more punctual and present for events with friends and family, but on this particular June day, it appears that the calendar had become forgotten.

Jake and Bradley were seated at dinner, enjoying a salad that they had picked up at the supermarket, when a thought entered Jake's mind. "Brad, when is that barbecue at mavericks? I could have sworn it was this week, maybe next?"

Wiping his mouth with his black linen napkin, rooster stood up, "I'll go check the calendar."

And there it was, underlined, blooded, and circled in red, "MAVERICK'S BBQ. DON'T MISS!!! 7:00"

"Shit," rooster mumbled, eyes wide, realizing the time on the wall clock, "Hangman were late!"

Jake stood up, pushing his chair back, still eating the last bit of his salad, "the barbecue?" he asked.

Rooster nodded, putting the palm of his hand up to his face, "Its tonight! We're going to be late!"

Wiping his mouth on the back of his hand, hangman began to untie the string of his grey sweats, "I better change then."

In their shared bedroom, hangman scrambled to find a pair of black pants and a creme coloured polo shirt with a tan stripe in the middle. Rooster, already wearing his jeans from earlier, threw one of his dads Hawaiian shirts over his white tee.

"Fuck," hangman said, "We were supposed to bring something weren't we?"

Rooster, grabbing his wallet from the dish on the counter, ensured his credit card was intact, "We'll stop at the store on the way there. We don't have time to make anything."

So, after pulling in the car, and checking the route to maverick's, the couple found that the only store open past 6:45 on a sunday was the local gas station.

The 7-eleven on greenway avenue wasn't the first choice for dinner, but it would have to do.

The man behind the counter with the greying moustache puffed a long cloud of smoke from his cigarette as the pair entered the shop, not giving the two of them much more than a quick glance. Once through the doors, hangman made a b-line to the back wall, where there were refrigerators stacked full of beer. He grabbed a 24 pack of some popular brew and met his boyfriend over in the snack isle, where he was thinking hard about what type of tortillas to bring.

"Just go with the blue ones," hangman said, "Their better with salsa."

Rooster nodded and followed Jake up to the counter where smoky-moustache-man was now playing some sort of slot machine game on his iphone. Rooster cleared his throat, "We're all ready to check out."

"Wait," hangman said, grabbing roosters arm, pointing to the 'flaming' Texas chicken bits' that were keeping warm under the heat lamp next to the Louisiana rib-tips and pizza slices; each in their respective container. "Babe, we should get some of those too."

Rooster nodded, "We'll take a tray of your ribs, four pizza slices, and a box of chicken bits."

Hangman shook his head, "All of that, but we'll take all of your chicken bits."

The man stiffly got up from his chair and nodded, sliding a pair of clear gloves on over his stuffy hands. As he put the pizza in a red paper box, his gloves made that satisfying crinkling noise, and he didn't get too much sauce from the chicken bits on them as he used a spoon to set them all in a large takeaway container.

He disagreed the gloves and pressed various buttons on the cash register, clearing his throat, "that will be $36.40."

Rooster gave hangman a look that read 'I didn't think we would be spending this much on gas station food,' and then used his card to pay. The clock on the lotto machine read 7:23, "We gotta get going," rooster said, grabbing the bag of food as hangman grabbed the beer.

The two of them loaded up into roosters old truck and sped down the freeway listening to 80's rock ballads. By the time the two of them rolled up at mavericks beach-side condo, the party was in full swing. The grill was going, as was the bonfire. Some people were down on the sand, drinking and laughing and dancing to the music playing from the speaker on the porch.

Maverick raised his hands when he finally saw rooster and hangman pull into his driveway, "Nice of you two to finally show up!" but he grinned, so the couple knew he wasn't too mad at them.

Rooster nodded, handing maverick the bag of food, "We got you something mav."

Maverick rolled his eyes, peering into the paper bag at the chicken bits and pizza, "The sev'," he said, grinning, "I know this food well."

Hangman laughed, slinging his arm around the captain, "Happy birthday pops!"

Maverick shook his head, "Thanks Jake," half-defeated to officially be 60 years old.

"Go join in and we'll catch up in a bit," maverick said, patting rooster on the back.

Near the fire, there were groups playing cards and other games, phoenix and bob among them.

"Where have you guys been?" phoenix called to the two of them, "You've almost missed beer pong!"

Hangman smirked, "What, are we in high school Tasha?"

Natasha rolled her eyes, "I'm surprised you even passed high school!"

The group, the pilots you had come to know quite well over the past few months laughed as the welcomed you into their teams.

Rooster turned to hangman, taking a hold of his hand, "Better late than never!"

[watching-pictures-move]

Put On Your Raincoats #15 | Rainbows in the Dark

To the extent that a porn director crossed over to the mainstream, Gregory Dark would be it. Certainly, there have been directors who did one or two porn features early in their careers, like Abel Ferrara, William Lustig and Wes Craven, but they're known almost entirely for their mainstream work. There are also porn directors who did maybe one mainstream movie, like Gerard Damiano, but their careers were relegated to porn for the most part. Dark is the rare director who was prolific on both sides, so to speak, starting with massive hardcore hits like New Wave Hookers, moving on to directing softcore, thrillers and softcore thrillers with some regularity and eventually becoming a popular music video director. My initial plan was to explore the full gamut of Dark's career. I wanted to get a sense of each phase of his work and to see what elements of his style translated across them. Essentially I wanted to understand Dark as an auteur. But then something miraculous happened. I got lazy. (Also I had a muted reaction to some of his movies and became more interested in another director in the meantime.) So I decided to limit my exploration to a few of his early movies and call it a day.

The first one I watched was New Wave Hookers, his best known hardcore title and considered a classic in the genre. What I expected going in and what worked for me can be deduced from the title. Dark's visual style very much brings to mind the "new wave" in the title: big hair, fog machines and neon lighting, all of which are first seen in the opening credits, in which the female talent almost ritualistically present themselves to the camera. There's some stylistic precedent in the work of Rinse Dream AKA Stephen Sayadian (the artist I got more interested in as I delved into Dark's work), but Sayadian's aesthetic feels culled from the art underground. (Dark reuses a few of Sayadian's actors in some of his films.) Dark's style feels more commercial, almost packaged for MTV. (Dark intended his film as a reaction to hardcore porn features of his era, although I'd argue that his choice of camera angles still feels in line with other films of the era.) This is a movie that looks good and, thanks to some choice music courtesy of the Plugz (whose song "Electrify Me" accompanies the opening credits) and the Sockets (who provide the theme song), sounds good too.

What I gelled to much less was the sense of humour. The movie opens with two buddies played by Jamie Gillis (wearing a tie over a t-shirt) and Dark regular Jack Baker shooting the shit and watching another Dark production. ("That fuckin' guy looks exactly like you. Is that you?") Baker starts expounding on his thoughts about pimping and "programming" women to fuck with music. Baker also notes, "a pimp calls a chick a bitch". They doze off, and when they wake up they find themselves inexplicably in an office. Baker is wearing a yellow tracksuit, Gillis is sporting an East Asian accent, and there's a guy on the floor substituting for their phone. (Gillis asks: "Why do we not have a regular telephone?" Baker explains: "He got the power, the second sight.") As the movie proceeds to make good on its premise, wherein women have sex after listening to new wave music, we're treated to a steady stream of racial taunting. Baker grouses about black music being ineffective for their purposes, dropping the N-bomb. Gillis continues with his accent. The two get into racially charged arguments. A middle eastern client is served in a tent and barks like a dog after he's finished. At one point, Gillis wants sushi and is served by Kristara Barrington while East Asian style music plays on the soundtrack. I recognize that a lot of humour from the era is extremely politically incorrect and has aged poorly, but there's something about Dark's use of racist and misogynist humour that feels especially confrontational. I admit I was a bit bothered by all of this.

Still, there are moments of humour that did work for me. One of the headsets that the characters use has dildos protruding from both earpieces (pointing outwards, of course), and the production design, while not always stylish, is at least endearing in its blatant cheapness. To their credit, Baker and Gillis have undeniable chemistry and do sell the material as well as they can. (I laughed when Gillis, when confronted by the vice squad, drops his accent and exclaims "I used to work in your fuckin' office, and now I'm rich, I'm satisfied, and I'm Chinese, you assholes." Am I a bad person? Probably.) And in terms of how it meets genre expectations, I do think Ginger Lynn and Kristara Barrington have a real magnetism in their scenes.

Given the racial content in New Wave Hookers, it probably won't surprise anybody that Dark was a pioneer in interracial pornography. I am not a sensitive enough writer to begin unpacking all the implications of the concept, but I did watch one of his movies in the subgenre, Black Throat. This was a shot-on-video effort and looks considerably cheaper and uglier than New Wave Hookers, but shares some other qualities. It opens and closes with a punk song that references that film as well as Let Me Tell Ya Bout White Chicks, Dark's first interracial feature, and to be honest, the song is pretty fucking catchy. The movie follows Roscoe, a man who wears yellow sunglasses and both a polo and a Hawaiian shirt and his friend Mr. Bob, a talking rubber rat. He's searching through the garbage while arguring with Mr. Bob over what to eat when he finds a business card. "Madame Mambo's House of Divine Inspiration Thru Fellatio!" (All of the characters pronounce fellatio differently. Mr. Bob says "fell-uh-tee-oh" and calls Roscoe a "fuckin' honky", to which he responds "Fuck you, Mr. Bob!")

Roscoe insists he has to find her. "If I don't find her, I'm gonna die!" (When asked why, he responds, "I dunno, it sounded kinda dramatic, I guess.") Mr. Bob enlists the help of a "young urban professional pimp" named Jamal, played by Jack Baker. (He prefers the term "flesh broker" and describes upgrading his diet, clothes and investments.) Roscoe, Mr. Bob and Jamal go from scene to scene, watching other characters having sex in different racial combinations, asking them where they can find Madame Mambo. (Sometimes they ask the characters directly, other times they talk to their private parts.) The best of these scenes, in my humble opinion, is a light domination flavoured sex scene featuring Christy Canyon. Perhaps because of the dynamic, there's an element of actual acting involved here, and because Canyon is, uh, pleasingly proportioned and has a certain magnetism, I found this scene more engaging than the others, at least until it turns into a regular sex scene.

Eventually they go back to Roscoe's place and find a voodoo ritual taking place where a black woman with multicoloured hair (think the George H.W. Bush rainbow wig from the Simpsons, but straight, not curly) is jumping on their bed while a bunch of white dudes in hats, capes and sunglasses jack off around her. This of course is Madame Mambo and at this point the movie makes good on the title while drumbeats and funk play on the soundtrack. Given the premise, this movie proved (thankfully) lighter on racial humour than I expected going in. There is an element of racial critique in Baker's character, and Madame Mambo is certainly exoticized, but the racial content otherwise is limited to the interracial couplings and doesn't overload the dialogue. However, this is a fairly ugly looking movie, shot on video, featuring unimpressive camerawork and lighting as well as extremely cheap looking production design (although the movie does mine this for laughs). I also found the sex scenes overlong and the music a bit repetitive. I imagine if you were jerking off to this back in the '80s it was easier to get through, but trying to watch it now as an actual movie, despite some decent humour throughout, proved a bit of a challenge.

The next one I watched was White Bunbusters, which despite the first half of the title is not particularly racially charged. The theme song here, crooned in the style of early '60s rock'n'roll, explains that the movie is about anal sex, as the second half of the title suggests. We begin with Tom Byron thrusting into his wife Shanna McCullough (while wearing his glasses) only to be disappointed by her refusal to take it in the butt. The next day at the office (decorated by construction paper all over the walls, drawers sketched in magic marker and a crude sign with their business' name "Acme Proctology"), he hears an ad for the "A-Busters", an enterprising duo who will convince your wife or partner to let you put it in their butt. We cut to the A-Busters office and see them in yellow shorts, lime green suspenders and orange baseball caps, fiddling with their hi-tech instruments (which include an "anal listening device"). Soon we see them go to work on Jack Baker's girlfriend, taking a cash payment after the fact.

Meanwhile, Byron's friend Greg Rome hears about his woes and offers to let him fuck his wife Keli Richards (Rome is named Bob and Richards is named Bobette). Of course Byron takes advantage of Rome's generous offer, but later gets annoyed when Rome insists it was a "one time deal". They're interrupted by Jennifer Noxt, who asks about a secretarial position for the law office next door. Rather than correcting her, which would be the right thing to do, they have sex with her, which is absolutely not the right thing to do. ("So do I get the job?" "We'll call you later, baby.") We go back to the A-Busters, who go to work on a pornstar warming up for her first anal scene (the movie is called Hershey Highway to Hell). Eventually, Byron decides to make use of their services, and in the climax, when he's having a nice dinner with his wife (complete with plastic cups and paper plates), they crash the party and get to work. After it's all over, Byron thanks the A-Busters and shakes one of their hands, only to promptly wipe it off on his suit.

This is as lo-fi as Black Throat, and features a lot of raunchy humour, but thankfully no real racial content outside of the title. Perhaps because the focus is on a specific set of acts (threesomes, anal sex, double penetration), the execution seems more consistently energetic. The ratio of the threesomes is a little off from what I prefer, but I was not unmoved by the scenes involving Keli Richards, Jennifer Noxt and Shanna McCullough. I realize there are more dignified ways to spend one's time than watching in its entirety and singing the praises of a movie called White Bunbusters, but sometimes the lizard brain takes over. I feel compelled to report the facts, and the facts are that this is good at what it does. As an actual movie, there isn't a whole lot to this, but were I to rate this on the Peter-Meter as the filmmakers intended, it would fare respectably.

Where Gregory Dark's style and the sum of his provocations really worked for me was in The Devil in Miss Jones 3: A New Beginning and The Devil in Miss Jones 4: The Final Outrage, a two-part odyssey through hell. (Attentive viewers may note that the original Devil in Miss Jones takes place before the heroine is sentenced to hell, but this is not a direct sequel. There is also a second part by Henri Pachard and later sequels directed by Dark that I did not see. The narrative in the third and fourth entries feels pretty self contained.) The movie begins with close-ups of our heroine, played by Lois Ayres, taking a shower while "A Christian Girl's Problems" by the Gleaming Spires plays over the soundtrack, her interiority hinted at with an astute song choice. (It's worth noting that this was not an original song made for the movie.) The structure intersperses her story with a series of interviews with those who knew her: an ex-boyfriend who "had a disagreement about the relationship" (he slept around); a woman speculates that Ayres was "a closet lesbian" and that "she probably went to live in one of those lesbian islands in the Caribbean"; a girl who knew her as a prude back in high school, a priest with a thick accent who offers a eulogy; her brother, who speaks in new age euphemisms and resents that she was the favourite growing up; and a blind ex-boyfriend who claims she was the loveliest person he knew "after Helen Keller". (This last character describes his sex life as very "normal": no peeing or dogs, wouldn't fuck pizzas, etc.) All these people knew her, but they didn't really know her.

The actual story follows her after she breaks up with her boyfriend (over the phone, as he shaves another woman's pubic hair while feigning innocence). She heads for a bar, brushing off a stereotypical black pimp played by Jack Baker who mistakes her for a prostitute, and promptly orders a "taco" (a draught beer, a Bloody Mary, and a draught beer in three separate glasses). Beside her is a man asleep on bar in tuxedo, who turns out to have been stood up at his own wedding. They hook up, leading to a sex scene scored by a blaring saxophone that I assume was practice for Dark's softcore work. The scene ends when the heroine knocks her head against the headboard and wakes up in a pitch black space near a grave. In comes Jack Baker, riding atop a woman, to tell her what the situation is. "You are dead, you got no clothes, and this is hell!"

The rest of the movie follows them going through different rooms, the heroine being unable to comprehend her fate, as they watch the different punishments endured by the denizens of hell. There's the room full of "peepers", virgins doomed to only watch sex for all eternity. (One of them explains: "I showed my tits to a guy to get a Gucci purse. He went off an overpass.") There are characters doomed to fuck until their genitals wear out or are ravaged by venereal disease. Baker gives Ayres a raincoat "to keep the come off", but the moment she forgets about it she finds herself getting gangbanged and promptly has to be rescued by Baker (okay, not that promptly, we get to enjoy this for a few minutes). Along the way we're led to believe from the interviews that the heroine might have a fetish for black men, and the conversation between Ayres and Baker grows increasingly heated and racially charged. This idea culminates in a trip to the "racist room", where a white man with a swastika armband is having a threesome with two women of colour while a white woman is sucking off two black men in tribal makeup. Ayres and Baker have a final confrontation on the subject.

"What about all the black racists?"

"Look bitch, when a black man hits a white man, we don't call it racist!"

"What do you call it then?"

"Smart!"

"That's ridiculous, there are plenty of black racists!"

"No dig, you stupid ass white bitch!"

"Look, you're even one of them, calling me a stupid bitch and a white bitch!"

"We'll you're stupid, you're white and a bitch, so what is your motherfucking problem?"

"You're crazy, negro, and you're one of the sickest people in here!"

"That's right, I'm a crazy negro! I'm so crazy I'll eat my own arm!"

This is a deeply uncomfortable scene, and what follows is even more disturbing, as we learn the true nature of the heroine's relationship with her father, a reveal that Dark plays for maximum shock value in depicting "The Ordeal of the Taboo Breakers".

In some ways this isn't all that different from New Wave Hookers, but Dark's direction seems more purposeful here. The stylized depiction of hell, with its black backgrounds and harsh neon lighting, imbue a real sense of menace into the proceedings. With the exception of two scenes, the sex isn't all that outrageous, but Dark's mise-en-scene has a way of rendering it almost as horror. It's not exactly scary and probably still "does the trick" if you're watching this for those reasons, but there's an undeniable charge here. Likewise, the dark humour and the racial content seem to work in tandem here, and Ayres and Baker really sell their adversarial chemistry. (It's worth noting that even by the standards of the video vixens that appear in Dark's movies, Ayres has an amazing hairdo.) Dark may not have entirely thought out his thesis along these lines, but the movie is provocative in its handling of this content, and unlike New Wave Hookers, not in a way that hurts it. At a combined 2+ hours, this probably runs a bit too long, but it does shape the usual procession of sex scenes into a structure that carries an uneasy momentum that matches the heroine's trepidation. We might not like what we're seeing, but we also can't help but keep looking.

[stellar-alley]

Everfalls

•Chapter 5•

This is based off of the artwork by oceanteeeth on Instagram! Also shout out to my Beta super.rose.cosplays!

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

(Summary: Eddie is officially introduced to the rest of the Losers club. Richie has difficulty controlling his powers as the full moon approaches)

~

The rabbit calmed down after a little. Richie stayed the whole time, comforting him and held him until he made sure that the other was okay. Once both boys settled, the wolf noticed the time and decided it would be best if he headed home. Eddie stood in the foyer with a blanket wrapped over his shoulders, while Richie stood by the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow okay, spaghetti?" Richie leaned in and hugged Eddie again. The shorter boy enjoyed the moment while it lasted, his skin felt colder once Richie released him. He almost didn't notice the nickname that he had been called, but he ignored the urge to call him out on it. Instead, he nodded.

Richie turned the doorknob and took a step outside, he turned back to face Eddie. "Wanna come over to my place for dinner tomorrow night?" He offered, a tinge of nervousness tainted his voice but only because he'd literally just met this guy and was already inviting him to meet his parents. He knew that Maggie and Went would wanna meet Eddie, plus, it's not like he didn't want to spend more time with Eddie.

The bunny's eyes softened as his lips curled into a smile, "R-Really?"

"Yeah! You know, like a thank you for saving my ass today, plus my parents would love to meet you. They'd think you're just as cute as I do" He winked before he turned to head out. Eddie stayed at the door, he leaned against it and used it for support as his knees went weak at the way Richie called him cute. He stood there and watched the werewolf walk away, he even turned and waved at the bunny before he disappeared back into the forest. Eddie's heart swelled when he closed the door. He leaned against it and slid to the floor and thought.

I think...

for once

I'm gonna be just fine

~

Tuesday morning Eddie got to school with lots of time to spare before homeroom. He left his bag in his locker and sat outside under one of the trees on the school's front lawn. This spot also had a good view of the bleachers where he first saw Richie, when he was coughing up a lounge yesterday. The memory brought a smirk to Eddie's face as he focused on his notebook in his lap, working on some last-minute biology homework.

He'd gotten most of it done by the time his ears tingled from underneath his beanie. He glanced up and noticed a pair of converses standing in front of him. Eddie looked up, after nearly being blinded by the glaring morning sun, recognizing the person before him as none other than Richie Tozier.

"Is that my Eddie spaghetti?" Richie asks, Eddie can practically hear the smile in his voice. The sun that rose from behind Richie caused the werewolf to appear only as a silhouette. Eddie squinted his eyes, trying to adjust to the light when he noticed how the sun's light shone through Richie's curls in a manner that made him look like he had a halo, and he was an angel.

"Hell yeah it is" Eddie set his notebook down on the grass then proceeded to stand up, finally he was able to get a good look at the wolf before him.

Today Richie had on a loose Hawaiian shirt, the shirt was covered in dark blue and white flowers, underneath he wore a black shirt with the words 'ALL TIME LOW' painted on it. Of course, his white converses and his black ripped jeans. Oh, and he also wore a dark blue beanie with a little peace symbol on it.

Richie smiled down at him, watching Eddie's eyes wander around and examine him, "Cute cute cute" he smiled warmly.

Eddie's cheeks went pink, "me?" he suddenly felt self-conscious about his outfit. Which was a simple pair of dark blue jeans and a light blue polo shirt.

"Yes, of course you" Richie's voice goes soft. He noticed one of Eddie's soft curls had fallen out of place, so he took it upon himself to tuck it back into place. The action received a blush from Eddie that created butterflies inside Richie's stomach. "Come on Mr. Tomato let’s head to class." He poked fun at Eddie's blush, which only made it worse. Nonetheless, once Richie began to walk towards the school, Eddie snatched his stuff off the ground and walked with him.

The morning went fairly well, I was only late to my second-period class by 3 minutes since I got lost... But other than that it was good!

Eddie recapped his morning while he struggled to open his lock. "Need a hand?" A familiar female voice asked from beside him. He turned and smiled when he saw Alley leaning up against the locker beside his, which was hers after all.

"I... Should... Be..." The lock clicked open, "Good!" he said happily.

She let out a happy puff of air through her nose, "Nice" She went and began to open her own locker, "Oh, by the way the girls and I are gonna go get subway for lunch, wanna join?" She offers.

Eddie tried to remember what Subway is, the image of a sandwich store in town comes to his mind, "Uh- Thank you! But maybe another day, have fun though." He wished as she grabbed something out of her locker before closing it.

"Okay! No worries, you'll be okay without me right Eddie?" Alley leaned against her locker again and tilted her head.

"Oh! Yeah, I'll be fine. No need to worry." Eddie tried not to make his smile look forced, but it was kind of hard due to the fact that it was indeed forced. Not only was he worried about what would happen if he saw Richie, but he was also worried about what he'd do at lunch, since he kinda assumed he'd sit with Alley. Looks like that plan went out the window.

They said their goodbyes then Alley was on her way, which left Eddie alone in the hallway. He grabbed his lunch and closed his locker. With no clue where to go, Eddie closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against his locker.

A tap on his shoulder brought him back to reality. He turned to see who it was and was surprised when he found no one beside him.

"Hey Cutie" a sly voice called out from behind him. Eddie spun around, he smiled at the sight of Derry's Resident Werewolf who was leaning up against the lockers beside his.

"Richie! hey!" Eddie couldn't hide the excitement that filled his voice.

"Hey Ed's, how's it hanging?"

The rabbit's face went blank, "H-How's what hanging?" he asked in confusion.

The wolf's cheeks went red as he realized what he'd done, "Oh- shit sorry... It means like, what's up?" Richie rubbed the back of his neck. He thinks fast and saves himself, "So what'd you got planned for lunch?".

"I-I was gonna eat with Alley, my friend, but she went to subwhich with her friends so-"

"Wanna come eat with me?" Richie asked a little too eagerly.

Eddie took a moment to think about the decision as if he hadn't already made up his mind, "Yeah, sure!" He piped up.

Richie led Eddie through the school and into the cafeteria. He was soon waived down by his usual group of friends. The two walked up to the table, "Ladies and gentlemen, we have a very special guest with us today. May I present to you Eddie Kaspbrak" Richie's voice turned into one of a TV announcer, he also held his arms out and waved them around Eddie as if he were showing him off.

Eddie's stomach filled with butterflies as he shyly waved to the group before him which consisted of 4 guys and 1 girl. They all happily welcomed him with hellos and greetings.

"Eds is new, so make him feel at home, alright guys?" He eyed them, almost threatened.

"N-Nice to meet yo-you" The boy closest to Eddie smiled.

"That's Bill, he might have a problem with speaking but this guy can rewrite the bible in under an hour. A natural-born writer" Bill rolled his eyes. Richie points to the boy to Bill's left, who Eddie vaguely remembered from English class, "That's Stan the Man Uris, he might look like a teen but he's got an old soul. Still love him though, right Urine?” he teased.

“Yeah, fuck you Tozier. Welcome to the family Eddie” Stan smiled.

“Beside Staniel is Mike! He’s both brains and brawn, book smart but also the quarterback of the football team. Ain’t that right Mikey?” Richie smirked and got a chuckle out of Mike as he waved to Eddie, which Eddie returned.

Richie moved to the other side of the table, “Here we have Ben, Haystack, purest heart in all the lands,” Richie slipped into a southern accent.

Lastly was the girl. Richie took a step forward and placed his hands on the back of her shoulders, “and of course Ms Beverly Marsh, a queen inside and out, Derry’s resident Badass.” She smirked and struck a small pose at the compliment.

“Welcome to the Losers Club!” Richie finished with arms open wide as he gestured to the group. “Now come! We shall feast” Richie insisted as he took a seat beside Ben, he patted the chair beside him, gesturing for Eddie to claim it. The bunny happily accepted and took a seat beside Richie.

Richie was about to take a bite out of his sandwich but instead he stopped and slapped it down on the table it grabbed everyone’s attention. “I almost forgot! Staniel, congratulations on the circumcision!” Richie practically exclaimed. Stan sighed, closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, almost as if it pained him to hear. Richie burst out in laughter, everyone else giggled along with him. Even Eddie, though he didn’t know what a circumcision was, everyone else’s laughter made him laugh.

The Circumcision Joke was created the day Stan, Bill and Richie were talking about Stan’s bar mitzvah on their last day of grade 6. Richie had gotten it mixed up with a circumcision. Ever since he made it a point to constantly congratulate Stan on having been circumcised, even if he had gotten it when he was a baby. Yet Richie always found it hilarious. Everyone found it decently funny, especially when Richie just randomly brings it up. Stan does as well, but he’ll never admit it.

The lunch was spent with the group getting to know Eddie and vice versa. Everyone was warm and welcoming. From time to time he got a couple odd glances from Bill, but aside from that everything went smoothly.

The warning bell rang and students began to pack up and head for class.

“Rich, I missed you this morning for our ritual chain smoking” Beverly stood up with Richie.

“Oh yeah, sorry about that darling. Speaking of our illicit activities, wanna go chain smoke under the bleachers?” Richie asked with raised eyebrows and a devilish grin.

“You know I’m always down for a good chain smoke. Let’s go” Beverly smirked deviously at Richie.

Eddie turned to Richie with a concerned look in his eye, “What about english class?” he asked in an almost quiet tone.

“Ah don’t worry about it Eds. I’m already like a week ahead of the class anyways. Just tell Brock it’s that time of the month for me or something” Richie made a joke but Eddie wasn't sure about what. He didn’t even mean to ask about Richie, he asked for his own sake as that was the only class the two shared. Instead of complaining, Eddie stayed quiet and opted to give a simple wave as Richie and Beverly linked arms and left the cafeteria.

The Ancestor let out a tired sigh and began to pack up his things, his smile faded into more of a resting bitch face.

Stan was suddenly by Eddie’s side, “Don’t let him get to you. He doesn't mean to.” he explained in a calm manner, as if this was nothing new to him. “It’s just the way he is….” His voice drifted off, “Sometimes he says things and he doesn't realize how others are gonna interpret it”.

“What’s your point?” Eddie cocked an eyebrow.

“He cares for you. I can see it in his eyes. So don’t think he’s blowing you off to go smoke his little cancer stick with Bev, those two are like siblings, so any flirting is purely for fun. Anyways, I’ve gotta go” Stan said.

Stan had taken one step away from Eddie when he asked “wait! Stan, what’s a circumcision?” He felt weird asking, since he had a feeling it was something dirty.

Without missing a beat, Stan replied with, “Oh, it’s when they chop the tip of your dick off”, his eyes were hooded and a sly smirk was plastered on his lips. Eddie’s cheeks went red as they parted ways and he waved goodbye to Stan.

Eddie went to english and caught up with Alley, she filled him in on what had happened with her group of friends over lunch, which wasn't much. But Eddie appreciated the gesture.

The rest of the day was uneventful, Eddie spent most of the class time just listening to what his teachers had to say and adding to his ever growing list of work that needed to be done.

Once the final bell rang, Eddie was up from his chair and out to his locker. He recalled the offer Richie had made to go over to the Tozier’s for dinner, but Richie hadn’t mentioned anything about it since and he hasn't seen the fellow Ancestor since lunch. By the time Eddie finished packing his bag he had accepted the fact that Richie had probably forgotten or something and instead prepared himself for his walk home.

He was two steps away from the main doors of the school when a voice rang out through the halls “Eddie!”.

Eddie has never turned around faster in his life. Richie ran up to him, with Stan in tow. “Hey! Still game for dinner tonight?” he gave Eddie the smile that creates butterflies in his stomach.

“I-I wasn’t sure-” Eddie began to ramble but he was cut off.

“Aw, isn’t this sweet. The fairies are all together again. What? Gonna go to some big gay gang bang in the back?” A solo Henry Bowers waltzed through the hallways.

“Oh go blow your dad” Richie growls, literally. Eddie notices immediately, so does Stan. What the two didn’t see was how hard Richie was clenching his fists, how his nails, his claws, had practically begun to draw blood.

“Can we please just g-” Stan tried to end it before it began but to no avail.

“Then they wonder why this town is going to fucking hell-” Now it was Henry who as cut off. Richie charged him, literally. He rushed towards him, grabbed his shoulders and threw him against the lockers.

Just as fast as Richie was on Henry, Stan was on Richie. “We need to go now” He pulled Richie by the arm out of the hallway and into the front yard of the school. Quickly Stan found a quiet corner and shoved Richie, “What the hell was that. You need to control yourself Rich”, his voice was stern and his stare was like daggers.

Eddie had watched the whole thing and carefully followed behind them. “Get out of here Eddie. This is private” Stan commanded, it sent a shiver down the other’s spine.

“Leave him alone Stan, he knows” Richie huffed, his eyes as yellow as glow sticks. Stan took one glance at this and immediately grabbed a pair of sunglasses from his bag and shoved them on the werewolf’s face. (on top of his normal glasses)

“What would you do without me…” He mumbled to himself as he served the rest of Richie, his eyes were now covered but his claws were out. “And how does he know. You literally just met him yesterday, can you seriously not keep your mouth shut for more then-”

“I’m a hybrid too” Eddie chimed in.

“What?” Stan turned to look at Eddie.

The bunny turned to make sure there were no wandering eyes, or any eyes matter a fact. There weren’t, which was good. With that, Eddie turned his attention back to Stan. It only took him a blink of his eyes for them to revert to their naturel magical state of ice blue.

His jaw dropped, “Shit…” Stan mumbled under his breath.

Their moment was disrupted by an agonized groan. The human and the Ancestor turned towards the werewolf who was now leaned up against the school. He closed his eyes and began to slide down the wall, to the ground.

“Richie, are you okay?” Eddie snapped out of his trance and went to kneel down beside him.

“It-It hurts” the wolf whispered, clutching his abdomen. “Full moon… 16 days. F-First change” Richie rolled his neck, eyes still closed.

“R-Really? You haven’t had your first shift yet?” Eddie realized with a nod of Richie’s head. “This is only gonna get worse…” The rabbit mumbled under his breath.

“What?” Stan was now beside Eddie, he stared at him, confusion filled his voice.

“This full moon is gonna be his first full shift. These are the symptoms, and they’re only gonna get worse” Eddie explained. He reached a hand out and put it on Richie’s shoulder. The werewolf moved his hand to cover Eddie’s. In response, Eddie squeezed his hand reassuringly.

Eddie took a moment to think about how he could help. After he leaned down and wrapped his arms around Richie, hugging him. Richie sucked in a breath at the sudden motion, “You’re okay” Eddie whispered.

Stan watched as Richie’s eyes slowly opened, the pain suddenly washed out of his eyes. The human squinted as he observed.

Eddie soon let go, happy to see Richie looked a little more put together. “What did you do?” Stan’s asked, his voice was calm yet curious.

“Well… Some Ancestors have healing powers. Sometimes they come in handy” Eddie said with a wink. He was about to continue to explain his powers when he noticed Richie had begun to stand up. Eddie rushed to help him up, his knees still a little weak.

“Thanks” He breathed as he put a lot of his weight on Eddie.

A car honked, three heads turned to see their friend Bill in his red 2005 Toyota Corolla. He waved at them impatiently.

No one moved their gaze away from the car, “What’s he doing here?” Richie asked.

“How long has he been watching?” Eddie’s stomach dropped at the thought of his secret, their secret getting out.

“Sorry, ugh. I forgot Bill was gonna drive me home today. I-I’ll see you guys later” Stan seemed rushed and unsure. He didn’t know whether to stay with The Ancestors and help Richie or go to his ride and make sure Bill didn’t see anything. He chose the latter, as he knew that if he made Bill wait any longer, the suspicion would only grow.

The two friends waved at the other in the car as it drove away. Eddie took that moment to push one more burst of energy into Richie. “Better?” He asked quietly.

“Better” Richie confirmed, a smile now painted over his face. With the sudden burst of energy that now flooded the wolf’s viens, he bravely took Eddie’s hand in his and began to skip back to his car. Eddie hesitated only for a moment. He watched the way Richie smiled and skipped and twirled, as if he had no care in the world and none of that had just happened. He couldn’t hold it back, so he joined in with him.

Word Count: 3282

I cannot believe we're already on chapter 5! If you think this is good, then get ready cause it's only gonna get better from here! So take a seat, stick around for a while, and join me on this journey.

Anyways that's all for me guys, I'll see y'all next week with chapter 6!

Until then

So Long and Goodnight.

~

[Taglist]

@richietoaster @s-onora @that-weird-girl-blog @beproudtozier @ghostnebula @bellarosewrites @s-s-georgie @lermanslogan @iamcupcakefrosting @madidraw @gazebobullshit @thoughtfullyyoungduck

Let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list!

[verai-marcel]

Ok hear me out, oh goddess of our Arthur smut, Modern day low honor Arthur (manager of [pick a store]) and fem reader, new hire. Work romance and pure smut, because I can see Arthur being the guy at work that comes in, in the morning and says “Ladies” and ALL THE WOMEN AT WORK SIMULTANEOUSLY SING “heyyyyyyy Arthurrrrr” back. XD

Business Time at the Bistro (Arthur x Fem!Reader, Modern AU, 18+)

Summary: You’re the new hire at a trendy bistro near your house; you were tired of commuting to the big city, and decided that less stress and a 10 minute walk to work was worth the pay cut. Your boss, Arthur, seems like a nice enough guy, but when he starts to handle your training personally? You start to feel things you shouldn’t feel for someone you work for. How will you deal with your budding emotions?

Author’s Notes: My title is a Flight of the Conchords reference. If you haven’t heard their song “Business Time”, go look it up. I know it’s not quite the mood I’m going for in the fic, but it made me laugh when I thought of it, so I just went with it. Anon, this is for your cute request.

Tags: low honor Arthur Morgan, smut, office sex, doggy style, dirty talk, slice of life

AO3 Link is here, you coffee snobs.

——————–

You walked into the bistro and fell in love at first sight.

There was soft folk music wafting through the air as you took in the scent of freshly ground coffee. A tray of scones and muffins, baked in house, looked appetizing behind the clean glass case, and the decor was cozy with a hint of modernity, resisting the urge to be hipster, and yet felt trendy as fuck.

“I want to work here,” you mumbled to yourself.

“Well, we’re in need of some help,” said a deep voice behind you.

You spun around and looked straight into a broad chest. Lifting your head up, you saw the owner of the voice, and presumably, the owner of the bistro.

He was a tall man with eyes the color of a lake and sandy brown hair, long enough to bury your hands in. His beard was close cut, uniform style, and accentuated his lips that you may have stared at for a second too long.

After a few moments of awkward silence, he tilted his head. “Sorry ma’am, did I mishear ya?”

You shook your head. “No, no, you heard me correctly. I’d love to work here.”

He walked up to you and held out his hand. “Arthur Morgan. I own this place. If you want work, let’s talk.”

His hand was calloused and warm, and held yours firmly but not aggressively. When he smiled, your heart skipped a beat.

***

An hour later, you had the paperwork to start a new job as a barista manager. You had prior experience with shift schedules and managing employees, and even though you didn’t have your resume on hand, you quickly pulled up your LinkedIn profile and gone over your work history. Your quick thinking and straight forward attitude had apparently won you points. 

Arthur, owner of Buell’s Bistro, said the original owner, a veteran named Hamish, had left it to him before retiring to Colorado. He said he didn’t know too much about being a business owner, but he seemed to be doing just fine, given the amount of customers you saw as you left.

Now all you had to do was give your two weeks notice to your current job, and you could finally make yourself happy.

***

You could not wait to start your first day at the bistro. The past two weeks had been a hell of a slog, trying to stay present and aware while you dreamed of an idyllic future. You were looking forward to walking to work and not having to drive an hour into the city every day. The corporate hell you escaped had made you strong, focused, and a nervous wreck at the end of each week. You were glad to be done with that career and moving on to something calmer.

Walking towards the employee’s entrance at the back, you saw Arthur get out of a dark green pick-up truck, sipping a coffee from a travel mug and checking his phone. You decided to wait for him, and waved as he walked up to you. He had told you to dress business casual, so you had on a black polo and a pair of khakis, but looking at him, you felt a little under-dressed. He was wearing a blue button-up, sleeves rolled up, with black slacks and brown Oxford shoes. 

You blinked and quickly looked away, hoping he hadn’t noticed you gawking at him. Last time you had seen him, he was in a bright Hawaiian shirt and jeans, looking very casual. You had thought he looked kind of cute at the time.

But right now? He looked hot as fuck.

“There ya are,” he said with a warm smile as he opened the door for you. “C’mon, I’ll introduce you to the gang.”

***

“Ladies.”

“Heeeeyyyyyy Arthur!”

Three women—well, they seemed more like girls to you— chirped back to him in unison. It was a little eerie how incredibly rehearsed that seemed.

Arthur gestured to each woman in turn. “This here is Karen and Mary-Beth. They’re front staff. Tilly here runs things in the back, since she’s got a good head for numbers, and she bakes too, but we all do whatever’s needed to keep this place runnin’.”

Each of them smiled and nodded at you; they all seemed friendly. You introduced yourself, while Arthur told them about your business background.

“Wow, Tilly’s in school for business!” Mary-Beth said afterwards. “I’m just getting a degree in creative writing. Not sure how much good that’ll do me, but one day I hope I write somethin’ great!”

You appreciated her optimism and positive attitude. And her Southern accent was charming.

“Write an amazin’ play, so I can be in it,” Karen said with a smirk. Then she looked over at you. “I’m a theater major, so there’ll be some times when I won’t be able to come into work.”

You nodded. “So when it’s finals week, do you all have reduced hours?”

“Yeah, Arthur just takes over,” Tilly said.

You turned to him and raised an eyebrow.

“I can make coffee,” he grumbled, and the other girls tittered. 

“The guests know it’s finals week when there are no scones,” Tilly said.

You made a mental note to get her recipes so you could keep the scones coming when she was out. 

“Alright everyone, I’m gonna train our new lady, so y’all get back to it.”

“Yes, Arthur!” they all sang. It still seemed odd to you that they did it in unison.

“Are they always in sync like that?” you asked him after they had all gone off to the kitchen to prep for the morning.

Arthur nodded. “Yeah, they’ve all been friends since they started college.”

“Oh.” It suddenly occurred to you that you were probably about 10 years older than the girls. Your back twinged, reminding you of your age.

“Now, let’s get started,” Arthur said, distracting you from thoughts. “You know how to make an espresso?”

***

You thought you knew how to make an espresso. But clearly you had to learn his way to making one, which was slow and deliberate. His unhurried method chafed your quick and efficient sensibilities.

However, the result was a smooth, rich, delicious drink, and you couldn’t fault him for that. You figured you’d have to learn some patience.

When Karen and Mary-Beth came back to open up the doors, you helped in any way you could, basically shadowing them for the rest of the morning. When they both headed off to class, Tilly came out to help you for another hour, and when she left for her classes, Arthur came out to help you. 

“How’s it been so far?” he asked when the cafe emptied out and the two of you were cleaning up. You silently hoped that no one would come in during the next thirty minutes before the cafe closed.

“Pretty good! Learning a lot. I haven’t done front of house stuff in so long,” you replied with a laugh.

Arthur chuckled. “You got a natural warmth to ya. I’m sure you’ll be alright.”

You smiled shyly and laughed, a little nervous at how your heart was skipping beats.

He said your name and it sounded like buttered rum, smooth, warm, and sweet. Your throat went a little dry as he leaned towards you.

The jingle of the door opening distracted both of you.

“Hi, welcome!” you said, switching to customer service mode with a warm smile and friendly tone. Arthur was right, it did come naturally to you, to please people, to help make people happy.

You didn’t see Arthur scowl slightly before continuing to clean the counters.

You did, however, notice when he charged the customer just a little extra without him knowing. You didn’t say anything until after the young man had left, just as closing time hit. Arthur went to the door and locked it, turning the sign around to say “Closed.”

“You charged him incorrectly,” you said. 

“Oh. Whoops,” he said, unconvincingly. 

“Arthur!“ 

"He didn’t notice. Besides, he pissed me off.”

“By doing what?" 

Arthur was silent, opting to shrug nonchalantly as he closed the curtains and started cleaning up. You got the feeling that you wouldn’t get an answer out of him, so you just sighed and cleaned up as well. Once everything was put away and clean for the next morning, Arthur locked up and walked you to your car like a gentleman, looking around for anything or anyone that might cause trouble. 

As you reached for your car door, Arthur put his hand on your arm, his fingers caressing your skin, sending a delicious heat through you. 

"You did real good today. Lookin’ forward to workin’ with ya.”

You smiled. “Me too. Just don’t overcharge all your customers,” you said, half-jokingly, taking the sting out of your comment. 

“Only the ones that annoy me.” A half-grin appeared on his face. 

“What did he do?" 

"Talked to you fer too long,” he said, his voice dipping low.

You couldn’t tell if he was joking as he said good night and went to his car. 

***

Somehow, three months went by in the blink of an eye. You learned about the cafe’s customers, got feedback, and started implementing some minor changes that made a difference in how efficiently the place was run. There was less waste and more time to spend on marketing, which brought in more customers. You felt like you were really making a difference; it was infinitely more satisfying than working for a giant corporation. 

In those three months, you had gotten to know your coworkers and boss. The girls really were 10 years younger than you, though sometimes it didn’t feel that way. They were all mature and wonderful to talk to. By now, the four of you had gotten close enough to have a text chat group, and Tilly would occasionally ask you for help with her business class assignments. 

You still refused to chirp along with the girls when they greeted Arthur in the morning, though. Seemed like it was straight out of a sitcom, and you felt embarrassed whenever you thought about doing it. 

And Arthur. Getting to know him had been a bit tough at first. For all of his friendly smiles, he dodged personal questions very well, distracting you with questions if his own, or just vaguely answering you. It seemed he didn’t want to talk about his past, so eventually you let it go. 

When you talked to the other girls about his aversion to speaking about his history, they absolutely confirmed it. 

“Yeah, he doesn’t like to bring it up.”

“Shuts up completely if you push him.”

“Whatever happened in his past, he sure as hell ain’t gonna talk about it.”

Recently though, the girls’ favorite topic was you. Specifically, their observations of Arthur in regards to you. 

On a foggy morning, before Arthur arrived, the four of you huddled around the kitchen oven, waiting for Tilly’s mushroom and kale scones to finish baking. 

“I’m tellin’ you, he’s into you.”

“Nope, not going there,” you said as you went over the inventory sheet on your clipboard. “He’s just a nice guy. He does the same for all of you.”

“There’s a difference when it’s you,” Mary-Beth insisted. “His tone is softer, and he stands closer to you.”

“And he brings you lunch sometimes. He doesn’t do that for any of us,” Tilly casually mentioned. 

“You girls usually aren’t here for lunch!” you responded, a little exasperated. 

They all laughed and kept pointing out little things that Arthur did for you and you alone, as you kept denying that it was anything more than just a simple kindness. 

But just a little bit, they got into your head. 

Right at 6AM, as per usual, the door opened. 

“Mornin’ ladies.”

“Heeeeeeyy Arthur!” the girls greeted. 

“Good morning!” you replied separately. 

Arthur’s eyes met yours with a warmth that filled you from head to toe, and gave you a smile that made your heart stutter. He said your name in greeting, his voice low and soft like velvet caressing your skin. 

Then the moment was gone as he went to his office and shut the door. 

The girls looked at you, a knowing smile on their faces. 

“See? He’s definitely into you.”

This time, you couldn’t even deny it. 

***

Another month had passed since you finally thought that maybe, just maybe, Arthur might potentially have some slight interest in you. 

For fuck’s sake, who the hell were you kidding? 

This past month had been sheer torture, as each time the two of you were alone, he’d sidle up to you and ask how you were doing and encourage you to talk to him. He’d brush a hand against yours, or lightly touch your shoulder, or if he was feeling bold that day, he’d say “c’mon, bring it in,” and open his arms for a hug before leaving for the day. 

Of course, you hugged him back. Arthur hugs were big bear hugs, his arms wrapping securely around you as he squeezed you close. They were the best. 

And you were pretty sure he knew you weren’t going to say no to any physical contact. You slowly became addicted to his touch, nearly jumping into his arms whenever he opened them. He didn’t touch you so openly when the other girls were around, but he stood close by so you could feel the heat coming off in waves from his body. 

Every day, you told yourself you’d stop inviting his touch. And every day, you let him get closer and closer to you. Like a spider weaving his web, wrapping his threads of warmth and desire around you, he’d give you little smiles and tease you gently throughout the day, making you feel like a schoolgirl with a crush on the new teacher. It didn’t help that you had a bit of a thing for a man in a position of power over you who happened to be kind and paying you a lot of attention, for that was exactly what Arthur was doing.

You had a feeling your boss kink was going to be the end of your career. But at the end of every day, when you said good night and saw the heat simmering in his eyes as you left, you wondered if it’d be worth it.

***

“Does Arthur hug you girls when you leave for the day?”

Tilly, Karen, and Mary-Beth all gave you varying looks of disbelief.

“No, he never gets that close to us. He even apologies if he accidentally brushes my arm as he’s walking past,” Mary-Beth said. Tilly & Karen just nodded when you looked at them for confirmation.

“Arthur’s got a crush on you,” Karen teased in a sing-song tone as she waggled her eyebrows. “He’s never been very touchy-feely with any of us.”

“That’s because he sees us as his little sisters,” Tilly said, matter-of-factly.

“How do you know?” Mary-Beth raised an eyebrow at her.

“He told me, one night when we were closing the cafe, during that first year.” Tilly measured some flour for the scones and gently added it to the mixer. “He said he was grateful we all were here to help when he inherited the place. Hamish told us we didn’t have to stay, but Arthur was so lost, we couldn’t leave him. Said we were like his family.”

“Awww!” you exclaimed, warmed by the thought of Arthur saying something so sweet.

“So, you thinkin’ about accepting his advances?” Karen asked all of a sudden.

The change in topic was like whiplash in your head. You had to blink a few times before what she said finally sank in. It took a few extra moments to come up with an answer.

“That doesn’t seem very professional—”

The door opened. 6AM, on the dot.

“Ladies.”

“Heeeeey Arthur!”

You sighed quietly to yourself before plastering on your game face and got ready for the rest of the day.

***

That night, as you swept the floor, you were lost in thought. What Karen had said, about accepting Arthur’s advances; weren’t you basically doing that?

You were thinking so hard that you didn’t notice that Arthur had closed all the blinds and come up to you while you were sweeping the corner of the room. You looked up just as he put a hand on the wall in front of you, stopping your progress and literally cornering you. 

“Penny for yer thoughts?" 

You felt heat suffuse your cheeks as you saw how close he was, forcing you to look up at him. He leaned down a little, his eyes flickering to your lips as they parted, your small intake of breath more telling than anything you could have said.

“Just spacing out, that’s all.”

A bit of worry crept into his expression. “You feelin’ alright? Have I been workin’ ya too hard?”

“No, no, I’m fine.”

He smiled. “That you are, sweetheart.” He slowly reached out to hold your hands in his, gently took the broom from your hands and set it aside. Then he took another step closer to you. Leaning in, he caressed your cheek with the back of his knuckles. “Real fine.”

“Ar-Arthur, we can’t.”

“Why not?” He shifted nearer.

“Because I work for you!”

“I wouldn’t force ya. If you’re not attracted to me, then say so and I’ll back off. No consequences, I promise.” He said the last part with a sincerity that you believed. Then he leaned in to graze your earlobe with his lips. “But I think you are.”

You let out a small whimper of need from his touch. He softly cradled your face in one hand as he reached around to splay his other hand on the small of your back, pulling you closer until you were flush with his warm body.

“Last chance, sweetheart.”

You were silent, staring into his eyes, your body melting against his.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he whispered against your lips before he kissed you. You could feel him pour all of the desire he had been holding back into his kiss, his tongue invading your mouth as he held the back of your neck and wrapped his other arm tighter around you. 

You wrapped your arms around him in return, grabbing at his shirt and pulling him closer to you, desperate for more of his touch. He pinned you to the wall, pressing his entire body against yours as he stole your breath, took your moans as his hands reached down and stroked your curves, brushing close but not quite touching your breasts. His hands traveled to your hips, and he squeezed with his fingers.

“I want more.” He pulled back. “I want you in my office.”

He had the look of a starving man, and you were his first meal in days. He wanted to take you, consume you, devour you.

You nodded.

Smiling, Arthur took your hand and led you to his office.

***

“Always wanted to do this,” he murmured as he lifted you up onto his desk, his hands sliding your skirt up your thighs. His fingers made their way to your panties, where he rubbed you slowly, feeling the damp fabric and smirking. “Feels like you want this too.”

You nodded, unable to verbally admit that this had been a fantasy of yours lately, a fantasy that you may have jilled off to on several occasions. 

His fingers pulled your panties aside as he touched you intimately for the first time. You let out a sigh of pure ecstasy as he caressed your core.

“That’s it, sweetheart. Just enjoy it.”

Then he kissed you once more, stealing your breath as he coaxed your tongue to play with his, the two of you making out with a frenzied passion you hadn’t felt in a long time. His other hand wrapped around the back of your neck and held you still as he kept fingering you, driving you higher and higher.

“Take yer shirt off,” he commanded. “I want to see all of you.”

You quickly unbuttoned your blouse and tossed it aside. Reaching behind you, you unclasped your bra and flung it away as well. Arthur pulled back to admire your body, a look of admiration on his face.

“Beautiful,” he breathed before he went straight for your breasts, grabbing one of them and teasing the nipple while he took the other into his mouth, sucking and licking you. All the while, he was still stroking your core, building your pleasure up more and more.

The increased sensation to your body was enough to drag you to the brink. You held onto his hair with one hand, grabbing his wrist with the other and pushing his fingers harder against your clit as he stood up straight to tower over you.

“Come for me,” he ordered.

You broke apart, burying your face into his shirt as you moaned wantonly, your legs shaking as he pressed his fingers heavily against your center, rubbing in circles.

“That’s it, good girl,” he crooned.

Catching your breath, you watched him grin and pull back long enough to unbutton his fly. Pulling out his manhood, he stepped back to you, touching the inside of your thighs. You spread your legs and smiled up at him.

“Guide me in.”

You reached out and grasped the velvet steel of his cock, stroking it twice so you could watch him let out a soft moan before you pulled him into your waiting entrance. He leaned forward, his hand cradling your cheek as he pushed himself inside of you, never breaking eye contact as you felt him stretch you.

“Oh my god, this feels so good,” you whimpered.

“Sure does,” he said in a hushed tone. “Better than my fantasies.”

When he finally hilted inside you, he leaned in and kissed you. Then he pulled out and slammed back into you, making you cry out in surprise.

And that set the tone for his passionate fucking, gripping your hips so he wouldn’t smash the desk as he took you with his powerful thrusts. He groaned against your neck when you grabbed at his clothed back as you succumbed to his unrelenting pace.

“I want you bent over my desk.”

He pulled out and manhandled you until you were bent over his desk, your ass in the air.

“Perfect,” he growled as he slid back inside of you and rammed into you again and again. “Yer so hot like this.”

Then he leaned over you, and said lowly in your ear. “You like it when your boss fucks you?”

Oh shit. He knew your kink. You moaned uncontrollably and nodded, feeling your pussy clench around his cock. He smirked, knowing how you had reacted to his words.

“Say it.”

“I like it when my boss fucks me.”

“Call me Mr. Morgan.”

“Yes, Mr. Morgan.”

“Good,” he purred, and reached down to stroke your core. “My best employee deserves a reward, don’tcha?”

“Yes, please!”

“Beg for a reward, sweetheart,”

“Please, Mr. Morgan, please give me a reward!”

He stood up and slowed his pace, but the intensity of his thrusts remained, the sound of his hips against your ass echoing in the small office.

“I’ll give you what you want.” He grabbed your hair and pulled. “I know exactly what you need.”

You felt his hand grab your shoulder as he suddenly fucked you hard and fast. The only warning you had was when his grip tightened on you before he let out a harsh moan and a string of expletives as he emptied himself inside of you, pushing his cock as deep as he could go, huffing as he finished.

“Fuck, that was… that was amazin’.” He picked you up and sat back in his chair, you on his lap, his cock still inside of you. He idly caressed your breasts as you both caught your breaths. When he finally slipped out from you, he laughed.

“Guess we should clean up,” he mumbled. You leaned your head back against his shoulder and nodded.

“Sweetheart?”

“Yes, Arthur?”

“You alright?”

You smiled. “Yeah, I’m alright. Better than alright.” You turned your head and kissed him on his stubbled cheek. “I’m glad I took this job.”

He chuckled, nuzzling you. “So am I.”

——————–

End Notes: This… got way longer than I intended. Oh well! Hope you enjoyed the ride!

[kaspbrak-tozier-reddie]

So apparently Richie is like a modern e-boy but can you write a fic where both he and Eddie are like soft boys?

Oh dang, anon! A modern!AU coming your way!

Warnings: mentions of drug use, Sonia’s great parenting

Send quote or prompt and I’ll write a fic

—————————————

As soon as he hears what and E-Boy is, Richie is quick to change his style, getting rid of his black jeans and graphic tees (obviously keeping his band tees). Richie had given up smoking years ago and he was glad he did, he’s much better than he was back in high school. Richie had refused to try vaping from Bev or take any more weed. He wanted to be clean, even if that meant going cold turkey on the things that gave him comfort and especially the potential lung cancer.

Swapping his emo look for a more colourful look isn’t easy, living for the dark colours and the eyeliner. It comforts him. 

It isn’t like he’s going completely soft, he still listens to his AC/DC and Guns n Roses CDs. Plus his My Chemical Romance and Nirvana CDs. It’s just the outside look that’s changing, maybe this way he can actually make some friends at college! Instead of shying away in his dorm room every night and day.

*

That’s just what he does. He sits down beside some boy (around his age) that he’s seen talking to his best friends, Stan and Bill. “Hi, Eddie right?” Richie asks the shorter brunette in a pastel pink polo shirt and jeans.

“Yeah, Richie?” Eddie asks, Richie nods and throws his backpack his feet and sits beside the other boy. “What’s with the new getup?”

“I was being labelled as an E-Boy tiktoker but I’m not so I opted for a change,” Richie explains.

“I kinda miss the grunge look.” Richie feels his cheeks heat up a little and hopes that his blush isn’t obvious. “But I’m really digging this, it’s hot.” 

Is he seriously outwardly flirting with me? Richie thinks, no, that can’t be.

There isn’t the slightest possibility that Eddie is attracted to the ‘new’ look. He has to just be complimenting him on the new style, Eddie is an obviously straight man, right? He has his girlfriend sitting right next to him, so he has to be straight, or at least Bi! Right?! RIGHT?!

Richie doesn’t focus on the lecture but on his panicking thoughts, completely overthinking the interaction only seconds before. He starts to tap his foot to the rhythm of ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go?’ Thinking of just leaving the lecture hall and potentially throwing up from the panic, or maybe the gay panic as some memes say. 

Maybe changing from an E-boy to a Soft boy was just a huge mistake! He can still be an E-boy without the cancer sticks, right? But he doesn’t want to be an E-boy or an Emo anymore, he wants to be the old Richie who wore shitty Hawaiian shirts day in day out. 

The one that cracked jokes about mom’s and his dick. 

The one that got straight A’s and helped out at the dentist that his dad owned.

Richie wishes that the times were different, back before the bullying drove him away to a state over and took up smoking and marijuana. Sure he met Bev but she wasn’t the same as Bill or Stan, he missed those lunatics. Well, that was until he found out that he was going to NYU with them.

With that being said, Richie pushes himself out of the seat and towards the exit, almost throwing up in the process. 

*

Once he manages to get up to his dorm room, he immediately throws up in the ensuite bathroom since Stan basically forced the three of them to get a large suite with an ensuite didn’t want to share a bathroom with anyone. It is more expensive but the suite allowed for a third person and they immediately said ‘Bill’.

“Oh sorry ‘ill, didn’ see ya dere,” Richie says with mouthful emerging from the bathroom with a toothbrush sticking out from his mouth.

“You feeling okay Rich?” Bill asks, Richie throws up a finger to tell Bill to wait as he spits out the toothpaste that was accumulating as he brushed.

“Uh no. I think Eddie flirted with me.” Bill cocks an eyebrow in confusion before starting to laugh. “What’s funny Big Bill?”

“It’s so obvious he’s straight and you’re reading too much into it because you haven’t had a boyfriend in, - wait, you’ve never had a boyfriend.”

“Yes, thank you so much for pointing it out! I’m a 19-year-old virgin, I get it!” 

Richie huffs and sits down on his bed. Maybe Bill’s right. Maybe he is overthinking the interaction just because he’s desperate for someone to like him. That has to be the simplest explanation. 

He just sits there for 5 minutes, thinking, thinking about Eddie, thinking about himself. Sure Eddie is cute, they’ve never spoken a word before today but he had seen Eddie around campus and in the common area of their dorm. Not to mention in a couple of classes and seeing him talk to Bill and/or Stan. This crush starts to build more and more but Eddie has a girlfriend that Bill swears looks like Eddie’s mum. 

“Richie, I feel your panic vibes. What is it now?”

“I’m going to talk to Eddie.”

Bill sits at his desk dumbfounded, watching Richie get up from his bed and rush towards the door, but he’s unsure if he should be stopping Richie or not. The thought of Richie getting his hopes up and getting hurt… it isn’t what he wants.

****

As he walks towards Eddie’s dorm room (he mentally thanks Stan’s loud mouth), he thinks about what ‘soft boys’ do. If E-Boys, wear dark colours, smoke/vape, basically be emo; then what do soft boys do? Maybe be sweet, gentlemen-like? Richie doesn’t know, all he knows is emo. He worships the colour black and the whole My Chemical Romance movement. He loves heavy metal and the 70s and 80s music, well era in general. 

He makes note that most of his old clothes, yes were ‘soft boy’ shit but were also vintage, like what his dad wore during the 70s and 80s. Is there such a thing as a vintage boy? Richie thinks, probably not.

Richie finally makes it to Eddie’s dorm room and he knocks lightly hoping that it is loud enough for the short brunette to hear.

“Richie? What are you doing here?” Eddie asks as he opens his door and Richie immediately found the floor interesting, keeping his vision locked onto the wooden strips.

“I uh - I just wanted to apologise for running out of the lecture like that,” Richie explains. It wasn’t exactly a lie, he did feel guilty for running out like that but the crush on the boy in front of him overpowered his senses, causing him to start an anxiety attack.

“I think I know why.” Richie snaps his head up, locking his eyes with Eddie’s, he feels his eyelids pull open as far as they can go. What is happening?

“Uh? How? What?” Richie starts to stammer on his wording not sure how to form a sentence. After 19 years, he has finally been made to shut up without being “beeped” or told to shut up; this is completely voluntary.

“I too have had a crush on you. You’re kinda hard to not notice in all that black. As much as I love the change, you’re such a hot emo.” 

Richie can’t believe what he’s hearing, he’s practically jumping for joy, but he’s kicked back to his senses when he sees a photo on the wall. It’s Eddie and his girlfriend at some fancy college event. “But don’t you have a girlfriend?” 

“No, she’s just a friend but she’s kinda obsessed with me and won’t let me be my true gay self.”

“So that’s why Bill’s so adamant on you being straight.” It all makes sense now, no wonder why Eddie cringes when the girl loops her arm around his waist or when she tries to kiss him, he pulls away. 

“Yeah, everyone thinks that. Myra just has my ma’s way of thinking. ‘Those homosexuals have aids Eddie-bear, they’ll infect those with weak immune systems’.” Richie starts to laugh. “She was the worst, tried to make me go to a community college and then she forced me to date, Myra because I told her I was gay.”

“Sounds like the absolute worst.”

Eddie nods and sits on his bed and signals for Richie to join him. Richie shyly walks towards the bed, sitting down awkwardly an arm’s length away from Eddie. The boy beside him gives him a look and he scoots closer to him, his long lanky legs outstretched in front of him. 

It’s an awkward silence, the two boys sit in silence facing the opposite wall. Richie needs to make a move, Eddie made the first one back in that lecture hall, so he needs to think of something and fast.

Richie scoots a little closer so that their hips are basically touching, his arm goes around Eddie’s waist, pulling him closer. “I’ve had a crush on you as well.” Richie swears he hears Eddie’s breathing hitch. Thinking he made a mistake, he pulls away but Eddie holds him back.

“You know the ‘soft-boy persona won’t suit you,” Eddie says. “It means you act all sweet but really you’re a fuck boy. Just from meeting you today and from what Bill and Stan have told me about you, you’re too sweet to be an asshole.”

“So you prefer my emo look?”

“Did you change for me?!” 

Richie laughs and shakes his head. “God! If I did someone needed to shoot me. No, I found this.” Richie points to his Hawaiian shirt. “Back at home and decided to dress like I used to. Band tees are still part of that, but I’m going back to the old Richie.”

Eddie smiles and looks up at Richie. “Tell me, what does the old Richie entail, and what made you say goodbye to the new Richie?”

So Richie tells him about his childhood, the bullying, the ‘mom’ jokes, the fact that he was a repressed gay geek that was more often than not seen at the arcade playing Street Fighter. He was a happy kid who chilled in his bright Hawaiian shirts (that were 3 sizes too big) and matching undershirts often paired with shorts or jeans. His coke bottle glasses always falling down the bridge of his nose. 

Life was simpler back then.

He further explained that when he was finally driven out of the town and to a state over, he met Beverly who was a complete and utter badass. She was the one that introduced him to more music than just Nirvana, Led Zepplin, Guns n Roses, AC/DC and Queen. Richie’s music taste developed tremendously, so his clothing palate became dark. 

She opened his eyes to the beauty of weed and tobacco, not to mention beer. She was his first and only friend at his new school, a real beauty, the only one that knew his secret other than Stan and Bill. 

It wasn’t until junior year that he realised that smoking was a cancer stick, sure he knew beforehand but he didn’t want to waste his life away. So by the time that vaping became a thing at the end of senior year, he had fully quit and was offered a puff from Bev’s Juul and Richie refused. 

****

“Wow. Didn’t pin you as a smoker,” Eddie says after 5 minutes of letting everything sink in.

“Please don’t hate me, I know you’re a health nut,” Richie says.

“I could never. I’m glad you stopped.”

Richie smiles to himself but dragging out a thought if he didn’t actually stop smoking. Would Eddie have turned the other way and refused to talk to him? Richie doesn’t want to be thinking about that but the thought continues circles around his head.

He can feel another anxiety attack coming on but he can’t excuse himself because then the boy that’s hugging him will know that something is wrong. Richie tries to relax and push the negative thoughts away. 

The two fell into another awkward silence unsure of where to go from there, but the ball is now in Eddie’s court. “So Eds, tell me more about you. I just told you how I have always been a secret softie,” Richie says.

That opens a flood gate of all possible topics to tell Richie so he stays on the topic of how his mother made him into a hypochondriac and made him into a repressed gay. 

*

Needless to say, Richie is starting to get weirded out by the fact that he’s in Eddie’s dorm room hugging or really cuddling the smaller boy and the two of them acknowledging that they have a crush on one another but saying nothing about it.

Richie doesn’t want to say anything in case Eddie isn’t - 

“Rich, what are we doing?” Eddie asks. “We’ve been sitting here for an hour.”

“Well, do you want this to be a date or just a couple of friends hanging out?” Richie prompts.

“I don’t know.”

“If you want to figure things out beforehand -” Richie’s cut off by Eddie’s lips. It’s over as quick as it began, not giving Richie the time to react.

“I’m ready to be my true self. If you can do it, I can.” Eddie smiles. “Wanna come down to the admin office, I have a major to change.”

“Going badass on me now?”

Eddie smirks and kisses Richie again, this time Richie’s prepared and immediately kisses him back. 

[andimackismycrack]

halloweenies - tj and cyrus dress up as richie and eddie

thanks to the suggestion from @tyrusendgameperiod here is this last minute halloween-themed fic! hope you enjoy!

“I don’t want it to look like we just scrambled it together last minute! We’re already behind on planning as is.” Cyrus sighed in his own dramatic Cyrus way.

TJ looked at him, rolling his eyes, “Cy, it’s September 3rd.”

“Which means we’re WAY behind!”

“Don’t worry underdog,” TJ ruffled Cyrus’s hair, getting a smack on the hand in return, “I have a plan.” Sure enough, TJ came through. He surprised Cyrus with ‘IT: Chapter Two’ tickets for opening night the following week.

Cyrus couldn’t stop gushing about it. He was so excited. You wouldn’t think it, but he was a horror movie buff, the theater was the one place he wasn’t afraid, besides when he was with his friends or TJ. He’d seen the first IT about 10 times, he’d even forced TJ to watch it with him a few of those.

TJ had been wracking his brain for cute couples costume ideas, and couldn’t think of anything. Until...

｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Opening night, they were walking out of the theater. As they left, you could see almost every audience member with streaky tears dried on their face or puffy eyes from crying. Including Cyrus and TJ.

“Teej,” Cyrus whispered, “That was so good, thank you.”

TJ felt that warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest and slid his arm around Cyrus’s waist, holding him snugly. They started talking about their favorite parts of the movie and that’s when it clicked. They had been talking about Richie and Eddie so much, it was obvious. Clearly that’s what they have to dress up as.

Weeks went by and Cyrus was getting increasingly anxious about their costume. He trusted TJ and all when he said that he was taking care of them, but he couldn’t help but worry about it.

TJ decided to choose a pink hawaiian style shirt with a white graphic tee underneath and jeans for Richie. Of course he also found coke bottle glasses and beat up tennis shoes.

For Eddie, he chose some red shorts (though not near as short as the ones in the movie) and a color-clashing salmon polo-style shirt. He found a fanny pack from his dad in the 90’s and an old inhaler from his mom.

TJ was proud of his selection, most of which he’d gotten from a thrift store. All but the jeans (which he’d already owned) and the glasses. He’d saved up for this with his job, being able to pay for it all himself. He got a text.

underdog! <3: pleeeaassseeee tell me what the costume is i’m dying!!!!!

underdog! <3: tj!

underdog! <3: tj!! i know it’s a surprise but please..

tj: okay fine i’ll give you a HINT

underdog! <3: bf of the week award!

tj: why not month??

underdog! <3: if you told me the whole costume, you might even make boyfriend of the year.

tj: okay okay. i can’t resist, you’re being too cute rn.

underdog! <3: omg!

tj: it’s richie & eddie! from IT!

｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Halloween was fast approaching for the couple, both so excited for their idea. The plan was to all meet at Cece’s house, then all go trick or treating together. They wanted to go out with a bang since it’s probably the last year they could all go. Then when they were back, they would have their candy, watch scary movies, and fall asleep in the living room. Though Halloween was a school night, they had the following day off as it was the end of a grading period, meaning the teachers would have to be at school while the students would not.

The fact that they gang didnt have school the next day, their parents were happy to agree for them to stay at Andi’s grandma’s house.

Before they knew it, Andi, Buffy, Amber, Marty, Jonah, Walker (despite all the drama, they were able to stay friends), Marty, TJ, and Cyrus made their ways to Cece’s, already in costume.

First came Buffy and Marty, in a couples costume of course, with Buffy dressed in old fashioned, pop-art like clothing, carrying an umbrella in gloved hands, and Marty with “dirt” covering his hands and wiped on his face, wielding a black umbrella with overalls and a striped shirt.

“Welcome, Mary Poppins!” Andi, a glittery fairy, welcomed Buffy and Marty into Cece’s house, spiders were hanging from the ceiling and there were orange string lights hung from what seemed every wall in the house.

Soon, the rest of the guests had began piling in. Jonah and Walker decided to go as Finn and Po from the newest Star Wars trilogy. Amber was dressed as a hippie, sporting straightened hair, a tank top tucked into flowing pants, and a headband across her forehead.

TJ and Cyrus were last to arrive, they took “forever” to get there according to the rest of the gang.

The doorbell rang and Andi jumped up to answer it, leaving the others sitting on the couch with a bowl of chips.

She opened the door to see TJ as Eddie and Cyrus as Richie. “Oh my god! You guys look... amazing!!”

Buffy was next to jump from her warm seat next to (more like, on top of) Marty. “Okay we HAVE to take pictures now!” She motioned over to a blank wall with a sheet hung. There was a photo booth set up complete with confetti and paper moustaches.

The rest of the night faded into oblivion as the once trio laughed too hard and enjoyed themselves so much, they didn’t know where the time went.

notes: i wrote this very last minute i’m SORRY but i kinda love this. didn’t u love the plot twist? also i’m sOFT for tj when he broke down and told cyrus bc he was being cute. might write a part two over the weekend for when they’re actually trick or treating with more dialogue (bc fun fact dialogue is my favorite part to write). hope you enjoy!!! <3

[tinyarmedtrex]

if u could swing 6 and 25 with streddie i’d love u forever

Body Swap & Accidental Sexual Tension

Ok strap in I’ve never written streddie or a body swap. Let’s see how this goes. Slight lemons ahead.

Richie woke up, stretching and rubbing his eyes as he reached for his classes. To his confusion they were there. It wasn’t until he opened his eyes- shocked how well he could see- that he wasn’t in his clothes or his bed. Instead, he was in a neat, orderly room and was surrounded by bird posters.

Bird posters?

“Why the fuck am I in Stan’s room?” He asked himself, standing and looking around. Stan was nowhere to be seen, which only confused him more. The last thing he remembered was falling asleep in his own bed so being in Stan’s apartment didn’t make any sense. He looked around for any hints or clues and ended up looking at himself in Stan’s full length mirror. To his shock, he realized that he wasn’t just wearing Stan’s clothes, he was Stan.

He knew that he should be concerned about what was happening and why but he found himself distracted by Stan’s damn body. He had liked Stan for a long time, nearly as long as he’d liked Eddie, and he was in the habit of forcing himself to look away, to not stare, but now that he was alone with Stan’s body it was much more difficult. He admired the body in the mirror, letting his hands trail down Stan’s narrow hips and to where the pajama pants started. He liked how it felt, lean and different than his own. Stan’s body was reacting to this but he stopped, knowing that Stan would be pissed if ever found out so instead of plunging forward he turned from the mirror and found Stan’s phone, plugged in and fully charged on his nightstand. Picking it up he checked the messages. There was one from Eddie and another from his phone, both saying that they were coming over ASAP.

A minute later two figures barged into his room, one of which was him. Except, it wasn’t him.

“God what did you put on me?” He asked, frowning at the outfit his body was wearing. Instead of his usually Hawaiian shirt and ripped jeans he was wearing a polo and shorts. It was weird. “Did you comb my hair?” He reached out to himself but his body darted back. “Don’t fucking touch me.” It squeaked, leaping back.

“Eds?” He asked, thoroughly confused.

“Yea, I woke up in this stupid, oversized body!” Eddie voice cried out from his body. It was utterly surreal.

He looked at Eddie’s body, which was standing next to him with his arms crossed. “So who are you?”

“Stan.”

“Fuck.” Richie looked at them, sitting down and trying to figure out what the hell happened. But again, he found that he was distracted. Stan in Eddie’s small body had come to sit by him on the bed and their thighs were touching. Eddie never sat this close and Stan had clearly dressed quickly, grabbing some of those damn short shorts and a tank top.

Eddie as Richie was pacing the room, running a hand though Richie’s hair. “Hey! Don’t tug that out, I need it.” Richie cried out, watching Eddie pull on his hair.

“Your hair is way softer than I expected.” Eddie replied, sounding surprised.

“It’s the conditioner.” He explained, watching Eddie run his hands through Richie’s locks. Eddie had definitely brushed it. It didn’t look half bad. It took him a second to realized that Stan/Eddie was watching him.

“What?” He asked, looking at him.

“You’re checking yourself out.” Stan/Eddie replied.

“Aren’t you?” Richie asked. Then, he couldn’t help it, he ran a hand slowly down Stan’s torso, playing with his nipple a little and letting out a small moan. “I mean, come on, aren’t you curious what you look like from someone else’s point of view?”

Stan/Eddie went bright red, shaking his head. “No. Not really.”

Richie glanced down and chuckled. “You know those shorts don’t hide anything Stan, we’ve talked about it.”

Stan/Eddie looked down, seeing that he had a growing erection. He crossed his legs but Eddie/Richie was already staring at them. “You’ve talked about it?” He squeaked. “What does that mean?”

Richie stood, offering Stan/Eddie a hand. “Bend over Stan, let Eddie see what we’re talking about.” He knew it was a bold, maybe stupid, move but Richie/Eddie’s eyes were trained on him and Stan/Eddie took his hand, standing before turning around and bending over, showing off Eddie’s perfect ass.

“It’s like two scoops of vanilla ice cream.” Richie said, biting Stan’s lip. “Don’t you want to grab it?”

“No!” Eddie/Richie replied but Richie glanced over, seeing that his eyes were darker and that he had stepped closer. 

“Can I?” He asked. Eddie/Richie  gave a small, barely perceptible nod then he asked again, “Stan?” He needed to hear it from both of them.

“Yes.” He said, his voice cracking. Richie grinned, maybe this body swap wasn’t the worst thing.

Here’s the list, in case anyone wants to send a prompt

[richies-sloppy-bitch]

Currently Untitled Fix-It Fic, Part 1 (Once I have a title I will change it)

Pairings: In this part: The start of Richie x Lucy Flannery (my OC, but feel free to use this as a reader self insert!) and Stan x Lucy

Warnings: Homophobic slur, swearing, talk of missing/dead children

Words: 1567

Summary: Lucy is just trying to enjoy her last day of school, but ends up stumbling upon Richie, Stan, Eddie, and Bill while they’re down at the Barrens, teaching them that there’s more to her than the rumors at school say about her.

I hope you enjoy, I have a post about my OC here: https://richies-sloppy-bitch.tumblr.com/post/189220214136/it-oc-character-info

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

     Finally, Lucy thought as she headed down to the Barrens with a backpack as weightless as her shoulders in that moment. Freedom. Less bullshit, no homework, and most importantly, less Henry fucking Bowers. She often came to the Barrens to have a quiet smoke, or to have a quick beer that she'd stolen from the fridge at home. She liked that spot because it was quiet and nobody ever came down there. Until today.

     She lit her cigarette and took a long drag, peacefully enjoying the quiet until she heard some splashing and voices. Voices of boys, it sounded like. Who the fuck would come down here to play in the damn water? The sewer is over there…  She was just going to let whoever it was do their thing, but yet, she was curious as to who would have the intent to play down there. She picked up her skateboard and slowly approached the voices. She could hear them a lot clearer. Two boys in polo shirts and shorts standing outside the sewer tunnel and two boys actually STANDING in it, one replying with stuttered words and the other in a loud Hawaiian shirt and glasses responding in bad attempts at impressions.

    "That's poison ivy… And that's poison ivy" the taller of the polo wearing boys was saying with a slight worry to his voice. 

    "Stanley,  not every fucking plant is poison ivy!" Retorted the boy in the glasses. 

    "Actually…" Lucy hopped over the rocks that dotted across the river to the tunnel, "none of these are poison ivy. But you see that bush about 15 feet that way?" She gestured, cigarette in hand, to a bush that looked different than the ones by the boys. They all turned their heads to look. "THAT fucker is poison ivy. I know from experience." She shuddered and took another drag. The boys just stared at her, silent in surprise. She had seen these kids at school before but didn't even know their names. They, however,  definitely knew who Lucy Flannery was. The girl who picked fights, who even fought boys at school. The girl who, it was rumored, also liked girls. The student consensus was that she was scary, and especially for boys who went by the term "losers", to be avoided.

     "H...Hi… Lu..lucy." the stuttering boy bravely spoke to her, his stutter even worse than what she'd overheard. "Wuh...wha..what are you do..doing here?" He sounded both curious and defensive, as if he were trying to protect himself and his friends from the mean, scary girl. She was only scary by reputation, not her appearance.  Her appearance was what drove the bigoted masses of Derry to assume she was a lesbian. Rail thin, dressed in a pair of denim shorts and a faded Ramones t-shirt, dirty black Converse high tops, not a speck of makeup on her face. Bruises adorned her bare legs, reminders of skateboarding trips turned awry and fights she had gotten into, but out of self defense, not schoolyard terrorism as everyone assumed. Wild wavy chocolate locks that came to just below her chin and seemed to grow every which way also adding to her boyish look, making her slightly resemble Ellen Ripley from the Alien movies the boys had seen.

     "I was going to ask you the same thing." She replied and took a step forward,  causing all four boys to seem to slightly cower. "Hey… I'm not here to fuck with you. I swear. I don't even know who you guys are. I mean, I've seen you at school and all but I was just curious why the fuck anyone would willingly come down to the sewers to hang out?" Her voice was actually somewhat soft, soothing. She sounded like the nicest person in that moment. 

     "We're luh… looking for something." The stammering boy replied, cut off by the one in the glasses. "We're looking for his dead- I mean, MISSING brother, Miss Noseypants."

    It hit her, at least who the boy with the stutter was. "Wait… You're that kid whose little brother went missing! What was his name, George I think?" She asked.

     "Ge...Georgie." the boy replied. Then she remembered, at least his name.

     "Bill Denbrough, right? I guess you already know who I am." 

     "Ye...yeah. And that's Stanley, Eddie, and this..th...this is Richie." He gestured at the boys respectively.

    "Well your brother is just missing, they never found him. You think he might be in here?" She asked Bill.

     "I h..hope so." 

     "Well… Do you want me to help look? I have nowhere to be." She smiled kindly, dropping the cigarette butt onto the ground and stomping it out. 

     "Re..really? You'd do that?" Bill was surprised, and the looks of amazement on the other boys' faces reflected the same. They were suddenly a lot less tense in their body language.

     "If it helps bring a kid home then fuck yeah!" She untied her shoes, stuffed her socks in them and began to head in, stepping into the fetid water next to Richie.

     "That's greywater, I'm not fucking going in there!" chirped Eddie as she made her way in.

     "What the hell's greywater?" Richie replied with a roll of his eyes.

     "It's literal piss and shit, just telling you! You're all walking around in millions of gallons of Derry pee!" 

     Grinning, Richie picked up a stick and scooped up what looked like a shred of fabric, pretended to sniff it and in a failed attempt at a Mexican accent, said "IT DOESN'T SMELL LIKE CACA TO ME SEÑOR!" Lucy couldn't help but giggle, this kid was hilarious already and she'd only known him for five minutes. Stanley rolled his eyes and Bill just looked at Richie sternly, who noticed the girl standing there was laughing. "At least someone has good taste in entertainment, huh, toots?" He winked.

     She felt a rush of warmth to her cheeks and she fell silent.

    "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?" Richie asked.

    "No… I'm just… Not used to boys calling me cute things like 'toots'. They mostly just call me a dyke." She said softly, her big brown eyes looking down for a moment. "I'm NOT one, just so you know." She glanced at each of the boys as she said that, trying to get her point across. 

    Richie grinned. She thought it was cute? Well she better, because honestly SHE'S cute. Especially when she's all flustered. He thought, before continuing. "Well I can call you all kinds of cute shit, like sweetcheeks,  sugartits-" he was cut off by Stan, who clearly looked annoyed.

     "Beep beep, Richie. You're making her uncomfortable." He scolded. Unbeknownst to her and Richie, Stan also thought Lucy was actually quite striking, and his interruption was jealousy disguised as his usual irritation with Richie's antics.

     "Yeah, and can you stop dicking around? I can smell that from here." Eddie added, which began a back and forth banter with Richie that had Lucy fighting for her life to hold back laughter, ultimately failing.

    "Are you sure it's not just your breath wafting back into your face?"

    "Listen, have you ever heard of a STAPH INFECTION?!"

    "OH, I'LL SHOW YOU A STAFF INFECTION" the argument was cut off by Bill, who had found something. "G..Guys…" he pointed at what looked like a white shoe, picking it out of the water.

     "Is it.. " Stan asked, nervously.

     "Georgie wore...ga..galoshes." Bill replied.

     "Then whose is it?" Eddie asked.  Richie looked at the inside of the white canvas sneaker that read "B. RIPSOM". 

     "It's Betty Ripsom's." He said with an unusual softness. Betty was another girl who, like Georgie, had gone missing and was never found.

      "I don't like this!" Eddie said anxiously.

      "How do you think Betty feels? Running around these tunnels with only one frickin' shoe?" Richie lifted his foot out of the water with a smile. Even Lucy didn't laugh, this was creeping all of them out.

     "What if she's still down here?" Stan asked. Bill and Richie began to venture further in, with Lucy following.

     "Aren't you guys coming?" Richie asked.

     "If my mom found out we were playing down here, she'd have an ANEURYSM okay-" Eddie began, cut off by Bill, who somberly spoke.

     "If I was Betty Ripsom… I'd want us to find her. Ge..Georgie too."

     "Well what if I don't WANT to find her? No offense, but I don't want to end up like Ge… I mean… I don't want to go missing either." Eddie replied. 

     "He's got a point." Stan noted.

     "Y..you too?" Bill looked at his friend.

     "It's SUMMER! We're supposed to be having fun! This isn't fun! This is scary and disgusting!" Stan shouted. Lucy couldn't disagree, she did get the creeps from being in there, but was holding her composure. 

     Before anyone could reply, a loud splash came from behind Eddie and Stanley. An overweight boy with dirty blonde hair stumbled in the water behind them, blood on the lower front of his shirt. The group all rushed out to see.

     "Holy shit! What the fuck happened to YOU?!" Richie exclaimed. The boy clearly needed medical attention of some kind, the bleeding was pretty bad.

     Lucy had a feeling this summer was going to be different. What SORT of different, good or bad, remained to be seen.  

 **To be continued.**