#and some of the character designs are a downgrade (I also just don’t generally like change so maybe I’m just being bitter)

[imma-bs-it]

Not assemble season 5 having a completely different animation style for no conceivable reason

[greenesmyfavcolor]

I got to see Wicked Part 1 yesterday so here’s a little review of it! Spoilers for the movie and Wicked in general if you have not seen it yet! (which YOU SHOULD)

I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned this before on here but I’m actually a super big fan of Wicked (I mean, who isn’t though, right?) I first got into it when I was around 12 and since then, I’ve seen bootlegs of it tens of hundreds of times, collected all sorts of things such as shirts, cds, posters, pins, books (yes I even read that book lol), and I even had the privilege of seeing it on Broadway a couple years back. It also got me into Kristin Chenoweth who I actually got to see in concert too! (No disrespect to the other queen ofc)

So basically, I went into this movie ready to be real critical if need be since Wicked holds a special place in my heart and I didn’t want anything in this to be a downgrade from the stage musical.

That being said, Wicked Part 1 was one of the best movie musicals I’ve ever seen. I loved, loved, LOVED LITERALLY everything about it!!! Everything from the songs, to the acting, choreography, set design, cinematography, you name it, it was PERFECT.

The one thing I was really worried about going into it was the pacing since the movie is two and a half hours long compared to Act 1 of the stage show which is only about an hour. But honestly, nothing felt dragged out and there were no unnecessary scenes added to bloat things. Everything went at a completely natural pace, definitely slower compared to the stage show but it made sense and it’s definitely not the first movie musical adaptation to do this. Because it was at a slower pace, it made the characters and scenes feel more fleshed out compared to the stage musical which was great to see.

The music was also on POINT. I had no doubts that Cynthia and Ariana were going to be anything less than amazing, and of course they didn’t disappoint. But there’s been so many movie musicals lately that just straight up don’t have good music in them? Like, the one thing you’re supposed to get right, they can’t even get that right. It’s definitely gotten better over the past couple years but most of them still aren’t as good as they could be. And as someone who’s lived and breathed the original Broadway cast album for years, I can see myself choosing to listen to the movie’s soundtrack over the Broadway’s any day. Some parts just scratch my brain better so to speak than they do in the original like “dear Galinda you are just too good how do you stand it I don't think I could” in What Is this Feeling? or “who's the mage whose major itinerary is making all Oz merrier” in One Short Day. Now I’m probably still gonna end up listening to the Broadway version the majority of the time, mainly out of nostalgia, but the movie’s is 100% on par with the original’s, no questions asked. The ensemble especially just blew me away with how clear and distinct everyone sounded, particularly during No One Mourns the Wicked and One Short Day. As they should though! We’ve become too sensitized to movie musicals today having muted and flavorless or just straight up bad voices in them that it was so refreshing to hear actual good, strong singing voices in a musical.

One big criticism I’ve heard most people having with the movie though is that the lighting is too bright and that the colors are faded and bland. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve gotten used to just about every live action movie nowadays looking like this but it really didn’t bother me when I watched it. Obviously, I would have preferred for the colors to pop more like they do in the 1939 Wizard of Oz. And the thing is, there is one moment where the colors do pop during the end of Popular and it looks SO good and like the whole movie should have been like that. But personally, it doesn’t hender my experience as much as it does with other people to the point where I can easily just ignore it.

Moving on, let me tell you, I cried so many times throughout the whole thing it’s not even funny. Now, I cry nearly every time I watch Wicked but it’s impressive that it was able to let me capture the EXACT same feelings I have when I watch a slime tutorial of it, or heck, even when I watched it on freaking Broadway itself. One notable scene was during No One Mourns the Wicked where before, I never truly took into account of how hurt Glinda must feel to try and hide all the pain and regret she’s feeling on the inside in front of everyone. But seeing the anguish on her face when she had to light the statue of Elphaba on fire SENT ME. It’s not something you can really pick up on a stage fifty feet away from you so seeing all the emotions on her face up close really choked me up. Another time was when Elphaba and Glinda dance together. Seeing Elphaba cry (which were real tears by Cynthia btw) for being truly accepted for the first time in her life really moved me like no other time I’ve watched that scene as, like I’ve said before, you can’t see the nuance of their faces on a far away stage. And of course, Defying Gravity had me bawling like a baby. It always does, but like I said before, it was able to capture the same feeling I had as when I saw it live on stage, it was incredible.

Also, I was totally NOT expecting Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth to appear the way they did! I knew they were going to make some sort of cameo, it was inevitable, but I thought they were just going to have a couple of lines to say or something. But NOPE! They straight up have their own new part to sing during One Short Day that COMPLETELY caught me off guard. I legit almost screamed in the theater 🤣 But yeah, that moment was really special and made me smile cause I could see just how much not only they enjoyed being there with all the little homages they made, but how much you could tell the other actors just absolutely adored being around them. And even if you went into this not knowing who they were beforehand (which how could you), you could tell that they were supposed to be a big deal based on their presence alone and Cynthia and Ariana’s chemistry with them.

So to conclude this long, drawn out review that I’d be impressed if anyone actually read all the way through, I think it’s of perfect of an adaptation as it could have been and it will definitely go down as being one of the best movie musicals of all time. Obviously if you’ve seen just a glimpse of me, you’d know that I already have an all time favorite, and that’s not changing anytime soon, but I’d be lying if I said Wicked didn’t come scarily close to topping it (not too close tho lol). I’m literally so shocked at how good this adaptation ended up being. I fear this is going to be my new personality for the next few months as it’s definitely reignited my love for Wicked again 😭

I absolutely cannot wait for Part 2 to come out next year so in the meantime, I will happily be rewatching Part 1 over and over again until then as it is THE definitive version of Wicked to watch now 💚🩷

[djsherriff-responses]

Personal opinions and general character design critique regarding the Nymphs from Rayman (spoiler: they all suffer from having same face/body syndrome and the designers being too horny to consider other design elements)

Betilla: I feel her origins redesign was a downgrade from her whimsical style in the first game, but I also do understand why they wanted to change her, as origins was meant as a reboot of the franchise and they wanted Rayman to be the only limbless in the Glade of Dreams. But since origins ended up not being a series reboot (with its plot only existing in code) and Rayman having skins/costumes who are meant to be different limbless characters anyways , changing Betilla drastically was already meaningless in the long run , much less the choice to make her be a basic hot nymph

Outside of it being impossible to Google her name in front of family , I personally don’t mind how she looks in Origins as the red hair contrasts really nicely with the greens, if you really wanna push some symbolism imagery here you can make arguments the red + green is meant to be reminiscent of flowers or berries. Ultimately though it is just a green bikini outfit with thigh highs and the only real connection to her role as the nymph of the forest/jungle area of the game is the colours, and maybe the odd stitch work pattern

Which is a bit of shame as you can easily replace the blue stars of her old design with an actual star-ish looking flower called Bletilla (literally one letter off from her actual name) or other flora

I don’t think the issue was they wanted to give Betilla a redesign that had sex appeal , I just think they went in the wrong direction with it. Considering that she played a large role in the old educational games and she was a sort of mentor figure to Rayman (if not just straight up his mother depending on one’s headcanons), they could’ve given Betilla a personality and sex appeal by making her a hot teacher type character (who may or may not count as a milf), hell give her signs of age like small wrinkles to really get the point across she’s older than most of the player characters, and she’s aged like spicy fine wine

Her design in the first game is adorable while giving her the vibes of a mature fairy god mother type mentor, but I don’t think it would work in the more modern Rayman games without some updated tweaks. It is pretty though and does has more personality than her origins design, and the other nymphs for that matter

Holly: I like that there’s some actual details on her and some colour variation compared to her sisters, even if she’s 3 out of 6 nymphs whose main colour is some shade of blue

Besides giving her an outfit that isn’t a skirt and bra, I think her design could better reflect that her domain is the desert of dijiridoos by having some musical elements to her design. It’s kinda odd her tattoos/body paint (which do look good on her and her skin tone) don’t reference musical notes at least, wasted opportunity there

I have this issue with Edith and Annetta as well, but I’m a bit confused about why dead animals seems like a popular fashion choice for these ladies , especially since (in the origins game) none of the nymphs are shown as fighters (not saying they’re incapable, the game just doesn’t show them as such) and we’re not giving lore hints about it? I’ll talk more on this issue when I get to the other two , but it’s odd that Holly’s domain is populated by birds and she’s wearing a bird skull

Was it a nightmare and she kill it? Is it a beloved pet and she couldn’t part with them even after death? 🤷‍♀️

I can’t really think of any alternatives for her or the other two animal hat sisters atm, but at least it’s looks badass even if it doesn’t do much personality wise, so points for looking cool at least

Edith: Edith I think is the worst design of the sisters , hands down, no competition. I mean , what is there to really say about her? “Oh we have a level based around a combination of spicy food and ice drinks with dragon butlers , how should we design this chick?”

“Just put her in red with a lizard hat”

Almost nothing about her design reflects her domain besides that she’s blonde and wears red , and that’s only half of the domain she’s meant to be part off. Her outfit pattern could’ve at least have some reference to the ice levels, or give her literally anything to connect her to those ice levels

I also don’t like how her hair is styled, the colour is fine but the shape looks ugly

Incredibly morbid Edith walks around with a dead butler on her head, especially considering the final boss/king of her level is also a dragon. Unlike Holly and Annetta, I can’t even give Edith credit for looking cool because it’s just more red on a very red and bland design

…… do you think Edith uses her corpse hat as a hand puppet?

Annetta: While I think it’s a weird choice to have nymphs of nature walk around with corpse head gear (much less ones of their domain’s general population) I think Annetta is the most justified of the nymph sisters to be wearing a hat made of a dead animal

Considering that her domain has a notable fishing population and she’s already dressed in fish scales, Annetta wearing a fish skull does actually contribute to showing the lore of her as a character and her connection to her domain. Unlike Holly and Edith , I don’t need to come up with some theory about their fashion choices when Annetta’s reflects already existing lore in origins (what little of it at least)

I personally do think the outfit looks ugly and plain uncomfortable, but I will give this design some credit for having one of the more visually detailed designs by virtue of her scales alone, and it actually makes sense for the nymph whose domain is the literal ocean to be in a skimpy outfit, even if her shell bra has to be glued on to her boobs

Unlike Edith’s outfit colour which is just red, Annetta’s has various shades of blues and teals that are reminiscent of the sea. It’s pretty I like it

Helena: Much like Edith there’s not that much to say here but what I can say is mostly positive

Helena’s a pretty standard design of “blonde chick in cool blues with white fluff details” and yeah that’s generic usually, but here I really like her. I think it’s how the fur and cloth looks textured along how her hair front is styled that makes her incredibly cute to me

Yeah, Helena is a simple but cute character design

Weird that a mountain nymph who has to live through cold weather wears a skimpy outfit with her bare thighs out , but I’m gonna assume that’s because she , much like her sisters, was designed to be sexy first and given aesthetics after they made the body model

Fée de la Mort/VooDoo Mama/Big Mama: As cool as she looks, when compared to both her monster form and the other nymphs , you can tell she wasn’t planned to be one of them, especially when you look up Mamma Hite

I bring that up because while Fee has a good design, she is also a visual metaphor that reflects Origins�� identity: a failed series reboot whose plot was scrapped in favour of goofy extremism (or sex appeal in the nymphs case)

So about Fee’s actual design: I personally don’t like the pink used on her and would’ve liked her Nymph form to reflect the monster form besides the hair

probs to the fact she’s the only nymph with her own pose which already gives her a lot of personality , but the combination of her tattoos, bone jewellery and her baggy looking eyes really sells the fact she’s from the land of the livid dead and thus sticks out amongst the other fairies, even if you ignored the bat wings she has

visually she does work as a undead fairy of the underworld who likes to rock and roll, so job well done with that

I kinda do wish they stuck with the frog though

[theeeveetamer]

I just wanna talk about the new Story of Seasons/Harvest Moon game for a second because honestly like

A(nother) Wonderful Life (the OG for the GameCube) was always such a fascinating entry to me because it’s quite literally one of the most barebones and easiest entries in the entire series. Like, there’s only four festivals, only a handful of random events, probably the smallest farm of any entry, it’s super easy to build friendship and villagers don’t have that much dialogue… yet if you ask any fan of the series they’ll probably still rate it highly. And I’m the same! I absolutely love the game!

I really do think the game’s simplicity is what makes it stand out in the grand scheme of things. It’s just a chill lil game that doesn’t require much from you and you can kind of take it at your own pace. And it has less of the like… massive farming empire vibes? of other entries or a game like Stardew Valley. More like a little homestead.

I think the remake really captures that essence too, but with improvements. I wanna talk about what I think they improved on a bit, more under the cut cuz it’s gonna get long.

I haven’t timed it, but the days feel MUCH quicker in the remake. In the OG it felt like you could get absolutely everything done (farming, running around and gifting + collecting all the flowers and such) by about 2 pm. I thiiiiink that was to give you time to do the archaeology and fishing and whatnot, but IMO the days in the original still moved way too slowly (also didn’t the game time pause while fishing and stuff? It doesn’t anymore)

Tool upgrades! The tools now have copper, silver, and gold variants that can be bought from Van assuming certain criteria are met, which means you can easily upgrade your stuff without having to know obscure triggers (e.g. befriending Romana and coming to her room at a certain time to get the watering can that can water 9 squares at a time). This makes it actually worthwhile to use all of your farmland AND water it twice a day, since it’s no longer going to take you hours of button mashing just to water everything.

Obvious but all the glitches are fixed now too. So Van no longer comes every day of the week, selling a calf doesn’t permanently lock a barn slot (what killed my first playthrough), etc.

The bulletin board is a nice way to help players gain friendship/pass the time but in a slightly different way. Plus it will notify you of important items, like the alarm clock!

The festivals are MUCH harder to miss now

I believe they added more little cutscenes (or at least possibly made them easier to trigger)

You can marry anyone! You can also pick your character’s pronouns so you can officially play a non-binary character. They do only let you pick between he/him, she/her, and they/them tho.

Adding onto that, they let you have a daughter finally, without any bullshit.

There’s kind of an inbuilt achievement system, which I think actually does wonders for helping give you direction while playing. Stuff like fish up so many types of fish, have so many animals born on your farm, etc. I don’t know if it’s possible to get all of them in a single playthrough but I am actually trying

The UI is MUCH clearer and more informative with stuff like showing you your exact stamina and energy levels

The cows no longer have to be bred to continue giving milk. I know some people probably won’t like this much since it added a bit of realism to the game, but I prefer it this way tbh. Because of the way breeding worked in the old game you basically always had a cow that wasn’t giving you milk, cutting into your profit margins

The goat. iykyk

Downgrades

They Bishiefied Cody (Gordy now) :( I wish the SoS games allowed their bachelor(ette)s to have more body diversity in general. Woulda married that man in a heartbeat with his OG design lemme tell you

The fucking territory mini game is still here. And you have to win ten games to earn a music record. Help.

[spinningbuster98]

Mega Man Zero 2 Part 3: Elpizo

Leviathan’s stage is one of those that is entirely held up by its aesthetic and music, otherwise, like the train level, it’s too simple with some questionable enemy placement (especially at the end), but it’s still ok.

Also those snowball throwing enemies are based on enemies from Chill Penguin’s stage in X1

Fefnir’s stage is pretty tough but also fun

The frog’s stage is...the Forest of Dysis act 2, it even has the same miniboss. Granted Fefnir’s stage also reuses Phoenix Magnion’s aesthetic, even starting from one of his generator rooms to give a sense of continuity, but here it really feels like an alternate version of a previous stage. Still good though.

The boss can be an absolute bitch though, especially if you let him eat those golden tadpoles (?)

Harpuia’s stage is probably my favorite of the game, mostly due to its gimmick with the differently colored crystal platforms.

It’s also the best stage in which to grind E Crystals thanks to those infinitely spawning red and blue insect enemies

So unique to this game is the form system: basically by performing a certain amount of actions in a stage (which the game never tells you about), such as killing X amount of enemies with a dash slash, or with the buster etc you can unlock different “forms” for Zero which will have slightly different attributes, like more power to the buster or greater speed etc

I never use them for 3 reasons:

1) The requirements can only be met during a stage that you have yet to complete and usually require you to stop and grind some enemies for a while

2) Each form also comes with a downgrade of sorts: the X form, which powers up the buster, also nerfs the sword for example, so I don’t think they’re that practical

3) Each form changes Zero’s color and they look kinda fugly imo

Speaking of Zero’s design I guess this is as good a time as any to discuss the Zero series’ artsyle right?

I wasn’t in the fandom back when these games were coming out but I can imagine that the artstyle must’ve caused plenty of people to bitch, especially Zero’s redesign, because this is the kind of hard shift in artstyle that usually causes fans to bitch, and to be fair: it is completely different than previously

From what I can gather the only real reason why Inti Creates opted for this style was to further give the series its own distinct sense of identity, which I can respect

Now personally the only real issue I have is that most of the characters are...pretty much dressed the same. Like they all wear a variation of that midriff exposing “shirt”, even Zero who’s supposed to be 100+ years old, so either fashion style has really gotten homogeneous or these clothes are not to be taken literally but more as “approximations” of clothing due to the somewhat chibi-fied artstyle

Furthermore most boss characters look like chuncks of metal shaped like animals with very little expressiveness.

What I do like about this style is the sheer amount of detail in the artwork and in the backgrounds (especially in the later games), not to mention how the sleeker designs lend themselves very easily to much more dynamic poses than previously, which helps the characters look just plain cool and stylish

For better or worse one can’t imagine the Zero games without Toru Nakayama’s artwork, it just wouldn’t be the same.

[ifuckinglovedinosaurssomuchjesus]

GODZILLA MOVIE MARATHON: Mothra vs. Godzilla (1964)

Now we're really getting into it, the moment the Toho monsters went from a series of movies aping off each other's success to a connected cinematic universe. MCU eat your heart out!

This movie is very much the next step from King Kong vs Godzilla. Clearly these big crossover cage matches were a success, but why bother paying fees to use some dumb American gorilla when you have a collection of home grown kaiju right there, fresh for the picking? There's a lot this film borrows from KKvG, the more comedic and lighthearted tone as well as the general story structure of building up to the big fight at the end, hell even the anti-commercialism message is carried over.

Still, I think this film is better crafted on a technical level. There's less characters, the characters are involved in both plots, and there's actual motivation to get the two monsters to fight. I really enjoyed the framing this movie set of the noble journalists and scientist vs the greedy and backstabbing businessmen. It’s, as the kids say, based.

Where it doesn't match King Kong vs Godzilla in my eyes is the monsters. Don't get me wrong, I adore Mothra, I love her to pieces. It's just that her being a puppet makes the fights feel less fun. There isn't quite that interaction you get with two suit actors, and while some may roll their eyes, I love the hammy wrestling moves of the last movie. Goji himself also is a bit of a downgrade in design, this is the start of his very iconic Showa era look, something that'd be kept mostly consistent for the next 11 movies, but I'm gonna miss my froggy green boy. 

Overall, despite being the better movie, I just enjoyed the fun of King Kong vs Godzilla more, and so Mothra vs Godzilla gets the slightly lower score of 7/10. Still really really like it, but we all have our preferences.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

SISHSJSJ ok wait you’re full on selling me on the hydration idea now wait the goodra hydreigon opposite vibes plus the territorial behavior study sort of thing??? Ok lowk im glad you did some reworking (couldn’t be me id probably flip a table atp) HUT IM GLAD YOU MADE IT WORK because the more i read the more I was like “haha….what if….” Ok I was actually contemplating asking like what if you replaced Dragalge with hydreigon but I figured you probably had some insane type matching involved in that and besides dragon their other typing isn’t the same so I was just like “er yeah idk”

UAHAHAHA LUNA GETTING DOWNGRADED TO A MUK sorry no hate to muk fans i just think its so goofy and its just like the classic team rocket/enemy team grunt pokemon HSHSHSH but yeah Luna will make do fs thank god for your big brain I feel like readers team also feels more stacked now LMAO

EVIL TEAM NAGI LNFAOOO real??? I love the matchups though it’s like that one meme pic of the pink Barbie looking house right next to the pitch black one

LMAOO pursuit is an itoshi free zone…we will note have Emo eyelashes here

OOOH ok very slay ik some pokemon characters have wild designs or very themed designs so wasn’t sure if that was gonna get mixed up or not the crow feather iridescent does slap though

MAMA Y PAPA imagine its a like one of those “a day in the life” videos and imagine garchomp and nidoqueen are also wearing matching aprons like karasus while they deal with all the babies (im also specifically thinking that there’d be some moments wheres there’s the excessive pink flowery aura used in some anime/manhwas where it’s like happy sunshine rainbow family LMAO you can probably tell that’s one of my favorite meme formats)

LMAOO exactly get the best of both worlds the ultimate angst crack fluff combo

After reading your drafts/outline/thoughts for the future peregrine chapters that Nagi is probably the most down bad person to exist like down bad to the point that NAGI is speeding over to catch up to reader before she leaves like bro is MOVING??? Insane ok but fr is some hardcore yuki stan could just throw out some ideas or thoughts I don’t think itd be hard for me to see the vision/get converted just need some guidance….

AHAHAH omg imagine a tabieita breakup SHSHSH ok wait im pretty certain ive read a fic on here that was actually kinda tabieita beef except I think it was like Karasu liked reader but reader liked otoya after Karasu introduced him to her and then in the end he runs to her house in the rain trying to confess before it’s too late but otoyas already in her house and they’re just hanging out and he’s like ok nvm like ok way to step on my heart that fic had me reeling

OAEU BAROU????? GUSUAISKSOSKSKS IM SO READY I CANT WAIT TO READ IT AND SEE NIKO SIDEKICK TOO LMFAOAOAOA

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT “haha…nice…” is SO Isagi coded he would totally say something like that (I’m pretty sure he DOES when his old classmate tada is like lmaoooo u just got lucky with that shot no skills lmaoooooooo) wait I love that LMAOO that’s actually the perfect approach to not making it angsty just make Isagi stupid /j LMAO but whether he’s just dense or stubborn or both I feel like that matches his vibe either way soooo

It looks like Mario and Luigi got fused with a piranha plant because what the fuck is that……..but fr tbh I thought I had convinced myself that I’d continue playing anyways just for the sake of following through and I enjoy the gameplay generally too but the new designs I CANNOT I mean I get it because they’re already made so many pokemon they’re probably bound to run out of ideas esp if the design team isn’t changing much but wtf is Gen 9….like I pulled up the dex for serebii and they’re so ugly SHSGSHS also the weird past future versions of old Pokemon whyd suicune become a dinosaur and raikou a giraffe??????

STAY STRONGGGGG real though just like the tags here the edits of them are SO abundant like pleaseee where is the variety!!! But tbh with the way u20 arc goes plus how saes nonexistent in nel I think it would take eightbit their entire studios worth of budget to make me convert so

Oooooh icic im not as in tune to interaction patterns so I lowk didn’t realize that might be the case LOL based off your rules for no exact repeats of trope and character are allowed hopefully the next three will give enough room/inspo for non overlapping ideas though! I’m assuming you’ll probably be safe plus what are the odds right….

LMAOOO imagine once pursuit picks up people are gonna think you’re a Barou blog /j if people actually start fully associating you with sae idek how id react atp it’s so ironically funny…no actually dw when peregrine eventually makes its big comeback people will all go back to their roots and be like “oh yeah this is that really good nagi series yup this is the nagi blog” LMAO

AHAHAH BAYOSAGI in the back as npcs deadpanning like “bro wtf” while aiku and arbok are vibing our running around trying to look cool and pick up girls

Wait I got distracted and forgot to send this earlier but talk abt perfect timing literally right when I choose to come back here and send this in ITS BEEN PUBLISHED BAROU OAEUUUH

- Karasu anon

YESS WE MADE IT WORK i’m so glad i love hydreigon and reader having one matches the vibes of her team so well LMAOAO like between gyarados houndoom and hydreigon alone her team is 50% demons that everyone is afraid of but they LOVE her and they’re actually just sweet and cuddly (actually hydreigon is going to be lowkey sassy but still he really likes reader just can be a bit teenager-ish at times) BRO THE REWORKING HAD ME CRASHING OUT NGL i was literally typing a response to your ask where hydreigon is the starter and donphan is replaced by nidoking but dragalge is replaced by espeon (in a situation where otoya and reader get eevees at the same time) at the same though i was just like 😐😔 the whole time because while espeon provided some type coverage it just felt so BASIC and reader’s team is meant to be fairly non-basic the halfway through typing out the explanation i was like wait…keep houndoom keep the theme get rid of the members we don’t care as much abt and BOOM done and done

LMAOOO no because there truly just aren’t enough poison types and ig muk is decently good…his star is his roserade anyways so it’s fine we’ll just have muk be one of the first pokémon he throws out!! wait also reader having a nidoking is so cute imagine it becomes friends with hiori’s nidoqueen 🥹 DHDKSJS okay wait do you remember the quick ball idea we had w phanpy…lowkey it would be even funnier with deino (baby hydreigon) because they’re not really found in the area so reader’s going ham trying to catch it and accidentally uses all of karasu’s quick balls?? HAHAAH hold on actually this could be done right around the arc where otoya gets his happiny (in that arc otoya flirts with a nurse joy too hard and accidentally gets himself and reader involved in busting a pokémon abuse ring) maybe deino escaped from that ring and that’s what tipped nurse joy off to its existence as well as being an explanation for why there’s a random deino wandering around!!

NO THAT’S EXACTLY THE VIBES like all of reader’s pokémon are 👹💥😈 and nagi’s are 🧚🏻‍♀️✨💖 meanwhile reader herself is super kind + gentle looking (and she actually is) and nagi’s the king of idgaf who would sell anyone out (except reader) for a lukewarm donut (jkjk he’s sweet too just not in the same way as reader)…i honestly rlly like the dichotomy plus reader having all villainous seeming pokémon adds to the “team x thinks she’s one of them” vibe in the beginning of the story…agreed her team is much more stacked now i like it!! zero weak links it’s all absolute monsters i KNOW the league conference hated to see her coming 😓

the most the itoshis get is a mention that they live in another region in like the isagi ova…maybe sae’s an elite four member and since in my mind the elite four candidacy process includes traveling abroad and training with the elite four members there perhaps isagi knows of the itoshis via that?? that’s why he’s not around when barou’s abt to challenge the champion too he’s in a diff region which is why he doesn’t know what actually happened to barou

HAHAHA you know how doggy daycares irl send like updates of what your pet is doing imagine the spin off is just karasu taking photos of all of the daycare pokémon up to stuff so we have garchomp and nidoqueen in the aprons looking after everyone and karasu with his camera just clicking away and each scene starts with like an image with a handwritten caption and then it zooms into the image and we see the scene it’s describing 🥹

NAGI INVENTED DOWN-BAD-ISM peregrine nagi my beloved…he is super simple with his gestures BUT it’s like the smallest things mean so much with him!!! agreed i need a yuki fan to enter my inbox and show me the light LMAAOAO

HAHA i think i read that fic too i was like bruh in no universe (except hollyhock) would i choose otoya over KARASU that was before miraeita was real too so it was especially emo to read

DJDSHSJA OAEU BAROUUU YESS i hope you like it!! it is SUCH a silly story 😭 but yeah agreed isagi not necessarily rejecting her just refusing to accept that she’s confessing is so him i think it’s perfect (and that way isagi stans can still imagine that he does secretly like them)

no because all of the new pokémon keep getting uglier and uglier and they keep doing stuff with the old ones and from i’ve heard the gameplay isn’t that good 😔 i’ll stick w my gen vi and before games thank you very much 🤩

LMAOO you’re so right the itoshi edits are everywhere it’s so funny…hopefully the love is spread during s2 but the good thing abt being a nagi lover is he also gets a lot of edits and content due to having a lot of s1 screentime so at least I’ve got that going for me

yeah just based on my guesses/what usually happens all of the people that follow me and would’ve requested have already done so!! so it’ll be randoms for the last three spots but they likely won’t find my account until i post the first event posts and those gain traction ☝🏻 unless people find me via oaeu barou and happen to see my event ig 🧐

PLS technically pursuit is a nagi story so hopefully once it picks up people will associate me w nagi?? although you’re right in that it is very barou centric so it might give me more of a barou reputation (for example the funeral invite that people keep liking) HAHAA no because somehow seabird is my most popular bllk work?? ig it is pretty good but come on now guys…read bfb…read hollyhock…LMAO PEREGRINE NEEDS A COMEBACK ASAP THE WORLD NEEDS TO REMEMBER WHO MY MAN IS

HAHAAH bayosagi are so done with aiku they all think he’s a major dumbass but he’s also a genius?? considering he’s supposed to become a professor and all…the bayosagi + aiku dynamic is hilarious i honestly love the prequel group just as much as i love reader and co + mc trio they’re so silly yet so sweet

WE LINKED UP YET AGAIN FKDKSJ looking forward to hearing your thoughts!! i think i’ll take a break from the oaeu for a sec after this to work on other stuff but the barou version is nice and long so that should tide people over

[frankenwolf1564]

Transformers Legacy Star Saber: Comparing and Contrasting

Following up on a few of my last posts (I swear I’m not always going to link something but context is important here), let’s round out the trifecta of (main) Star Sabers with his latest effort, the Haslab figure. I know the Robotmasters figure is A Thing but it’s tiny and expensive and I don’t have it sue me

Produced under Hasbro’s crowdfunding effort, Haslab, and released under the Legacy banner, this latest take on the Autobot supreme commander is… Star Saber. Again. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! He’s a fantastic design and great character, but by this point you know how he works. So, let’s compare and contrast to see what this release does differently, what’s better, and what’s maybe a bit worse.

Starting off with his (second) smallest form, Saber is an immediate improvement over his Masterpiece counterpart due to having actual legs. This is easily the piece that received the most attention. With an ab crunch, a waist swivel, hips, a proper thigh swivel and ankles, he can actually pose worth a damn. Even his knees see a rework, with the joints needed for folding him in half moved up into his hips. His arms get a slight downgrade, but the biggest change is that his hands and shoulders are on ball joints. Moving briefly down to his Brainmaster component… this thing worries me. The effect was reworked yet again, with the face now being on the back and the Brain of Courage now sitting in a rotating compartment. This gives Saber a much cleaner neck swivel, but that hinge is thin and scary, especially being on clear plastic, for some reason. Did it need ball jointed arms too? You’re not posing this thing c’mon.

Overall, base form Saber is a staunch upgrade from his MP equivalent, his smaller stature hiding away many delights, though this is where most of the concern lies with this set. He’s not as robust or hardy as previous outings, the potential for breakages much higher this time around and increasing worry when you’re handling him. The chrome is a much deeper gold, though it’s a bit delicate, and this is where most of the initial QC issues popped up. They had the thin plastic ties running right over his chest, leading to a lot of first copies being ruined. They had to make a second batch there were so many complaints. A second batch of a time limited backer exclusive made-to-order figure.

His transformation sees more changes, moving away from leg sliders into collapsing hinges covered by panels. You do have to remove the Brainmaster though. His other incarnations let you just leave it in either his chest or cockpit and not see a mechanical difference in any mode, but here the nose cone’s permanently extended hilt forces you to fold his head into his chest. The jet mode is… smaller. That’s it really. That’s the only noteworthy visual shift in both this and the V-Star, save for some classic Generations greebling.

Moving onto the V-Star, it recovers the base mode (which I will not be covering because I do not care) from the original and you can plonk the shield on the back of the jet to fill it out. You can also use it for a similar effect in said base mode, but it tabs in very loosely and doesn’t add much to the already bland display option. The transformation again shifts away from sliders and unlocking buttons, with both the arms and legs now featuring panels that fold out to let you collapse his limbs before tabbing back into place to secure them. His legs split partway through the thigh to move into place, with his arms tabbing into them at hip level. Bringing in Saber, he folds up like normal and slots into place, except now his chest tabs in, the grey panels in the side acting as anchor points. Lowering the helmet into place, you get to watch as the mask… doesn’t flip down. You have to do it manually. The helmet is also completely detached. The original has it anchored onto the V-Star, and the MP lets you easily remove it from an armature or leave it attached, if you so choose. Legacy provides no such option, the helmet permanently separated. The sword blade also isn’t stored along his back, his legs now where you can slot it for safe keeping. Ironically, one of the only things that didn’t change from either of his previous incarnations is the button to release Saber, all three figures using it despite Legacy’s shift away from such elements elsewhere. Not that that’s a huge deal, I just find what has and has not changed neat. If whether a toy uses a button or not is a deal breaker for you, I would seriously reconsider your collecting priorities.

The full Star Saber combined form is as stoic as ever, though much stouter this time around. He loses the MP’s more slender proportions and is smaller than even the original toy, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing depending on who you ask, considering the size of G1 Star Saber. His sword is merely painted silver instead of being chromed, but it still looks nice. You’re supposed to be able to position it either vertically or horizontally but. Mine doesn’t do that. It only goes in the one way. Apparently it’s a semi-common issue. Either way Star Saber is a fair bit sturdier than Saber, massively reducing fears of breakage in this form. They’re not completely dissipated, sadly, but it’s still a staunch improvement. Now most of the worry simply comes from its exclusivity.

Articulation is... pretty close to the MP, actually. He gets a double butterfly joint instead of a singular one, the extra range a requirement to double hand his sword considering how far his tits chest sticks out. His hands still open, utilizing the same tech to hide away the 5mm port that Siege Jetfire did, but his fingers are a single piece now. For whatever that difference is worth. He features a very light/tight ab crunch and proper side skirts for his hips! He can actually spread his legs now. His back skirt is still static, and you can still only get two ratchet clicks, but that’s definitely a conscious decision this time around. It’s not a huge deal though, because opening up those side skirts makes a massive difference. His legs are a little stiffer than the MP, lacking the swivel below the knee, but again, it doesn’t matter! He can move his damn legs! And do stuff with them!!! Oh and the ankle tilt is a tiny bit wider. That too. It’s still not much…

Those of you who are more familiar with this set might be asking: What about Victory Saber? Where’s Victory Leo? To that I say: Victory Saber sucks. I am not covering it here. In terms of combined forms, it is bland and a significant step down from the previous God Ginrai, which looks drastically different from Super Ginrai and earns its status as a super mode. Meanwhile Victory Saber is just Star Saber with a pair of boots. He gains a set of wings, that color match, a set of cannons, that color match, and some dinky ass fuckin shoes. It is not visually distinct and adds very little of note. Almost none of Victory Leo’s unique design contributes to the look or feel. Victory Leo himself is fine, but he’s still very bland. The actual figure is competent enough, and the matching chest design is fun, but, again, doesn’t play into anything in the combined mode. What doesn’t end up on the shoes just turns into a backpack. His lion mode is one of the late G1 beast formers of all time and his """space ship""" """mode""" was only included for completions sake.

As a whole, Legacy Star Saber is an improvement over his prior Masterpiece effort, though only slightly. He’s more refined, and this is especially true for Saber, but the MP is still quite good, so the combined form didn’t have to change much to be better. He’s smaller, so he more easily fits into a CHUG display, though technically the MP is closer to CHUG scale… a discussion for another time! So, while he maybe feels a tad more fragile than he should considering the… everything, really, Legacy Haslab Star Saber is an excellent time and brings the character into the Generations family near flawlessly. Thank god he didn’t win the Power of the Primes fan vote.

[awhphooey]

PLEASE talk to me about your tmnt designs they are so good and friend shaped

OK!!! >:D gonna just copy paste them directly from discord so excuse the “like previously stated” stuff lmao

Raph:

Ok so!! This one might be short bc I do really enjoy his canon design. I made his spikes a bit more rounded than they are in canon because alligator snapping turtles are sharp but not that sharp (I’m aware the show’s style is just generally sharp as well). I also think it suits his personality more, with the spikes being a bit rounded out. He’s big and tough, yes, and he can definitely beat the shit out of people, but with his brothers he’s just a big teddy bear! Clothes wise I was initially going to give him a ripped jersey but decided against it because I wanted to show off the cracks and marks on his shell. He’s a big guy which means he most likely just throws himself (literally) into fights, which would definitely end up with him getting some marks in his shell. I left the x bandages on his chest and added some others on his side, as well as a sticker from Mikey over one of the smaller scratches. I ended up ripping the ends of his bandana as well, more than I think it is in the show, if it is at all. I let him keep the wraps on his feet and hands, and added some sweat bands on his wrists (despite the fact they wouldn’t work that way) to replace the sporty vibe the jersey would’ve given. I also gave him shorts for the same reason. It just gives him a boxer vibe imo. Giving him a tail is the only thing I will never regret because 1. TAIL. 2. long tails are like??? A defining trait of snapping turtles bro. I already explained that his markings aren’t natural, and that they’re sprayed on by Mikey. He probably has to get them redone every once in a while, which means the shape of them might change a bit every time. (The small splatters definitely do) that’s sort of all I can think about to say for Raph? He’s my sweet cheese? My good time boy?

Leo:

Woo! Guy I stole my name from let’s go- his design didn’t change much either, if I’m being honest. Probably changed less than Raph’s. I liked the crescent markings on his eyes instead of the classic slider stripes, I just think they fit his vibe more so I let those be. The crescents on his arms, however, had to go. I know they were probably chosen to be easier for the animators, but I’m not an animator and my boy isn’t a damn tiger!! So racing stripes it is! I left the color alone tho bc I liked the contrast. His gloves also got left alone because I enjoy how dramatically they flare out. He got a scarf because I thought it looked cool but also !! It is kind of reminiscent of the weird shock collar thingy he got in Donnie’s Gifts. Obviously this scarf won’t keep his quips at bay, but at least he’ll be warm while he messes around. He also gets to keep his over the shoulder thing instead of being downgraded to a belt like Mikey, just because his sword is too damn long to fit in a side holster thingy (idk if holster is the right term for the sword one or if it’s exclusively for firearms). I was high key debating giving him a Fanny pack bc I thought it would’ve been funny, but braces *and* a Fanny pack would’ve made me feel like I was trying to make fun of him for some reason so he just gets a slightly bigger side bag. Satchel? Idk. I gave him a few marks as well because out of all four of them, I feel like he gets knocked around the most- mostly because he’s the one running in without a plan. He’s got one on his leg, two (from the same injury) on his left arm, and one across the bridge of where his nose would be. I wasn’t sure if I was going to add the nose one, because I was having trouble thinking of how he would get a cut so deep on his nose to scar but not to affect his eyes, but then I remembered I don’t care for logic when it comes to character design. He’s also got a bit of a torn up shell from roughhousing with Raph and pulling stupid stunts.

Donnie:

Burger boy!! Ok so I am a firm believer in Donnie should get clothing/tech that will actually help him and doesn’t just look cool. Hence the welding gloves and goggles! I also think he would use the bandana around his neck as a mask to cover the bottom half of his face! When he’s not wearing his mask, as you can see, he just keeps the goggles around his neck. I think that the turtles wouldn’t always be wearing their masks, but Donnie always wants his goggles with him, so he just lets em hang there. The tech pad on his arm controls his shells and Shelldon, as well as just being used like any tablet can be used. He usually does things himself, but he has the doc Ock robot arms to help him with smaller tasks like carrying things or holding stuff for him while he works. Also to hold his phone because,,, Gen Z man… anyways actual design wise, I just kept with the patterns he has in the show. I gave him 2012 Donnie’s tooth gap because I enjoy it immensely, and I gave him slightly webbed feet for swimming. He would be the best swimmer out of all of his brothers because of it. Also yeah, he’s got normal people eyebrows now, but the ones you see over his mask are 100% drawn on. Speaking of his mask!!!! I gave him a little Deadpool type bump at the back of it because I wanted to and also because I have never once in my life been able to tie a bandana around my head like that without having a bump. Is this the shortest one? Probably, I literally can’t tell rn 💀 Sorry Donnie I said Leo changed the least but maybe it was you. Or I’m just bad at analyzing my design for him

Mikey:

Ok Mikey now bc he’s last (rip)!! He definitely got the most little details added in, because he was the first one I drew. Also because his initial design already has so much character compared to the others. First off, pattern: FRECKLESSSSS I enjoy him having tiny speckles instead of just big blotches. I just think it gives him more of an asymmetrical look. Same with the stickers on his shell!! I purposely gave him no two shapes the same so it would be a bit more mismatchy. The skull- like previously stated- is a reference to his toddler design, which had a skull on an orange sleeveless hoodie. WHY DOES HE HAVE KNEE PADS AND NO ELBOW PADS. WHAT IS THE POINT OF THEM. So anyways he has elbow pads now. You can’t see them but he has more faces drawn on them. I gave him one sweatband on one wrist and the beaded bracelets on the other, again, for asymmetry. One of the only symmetrical things is probably his spats/socks/shoe thingies. His backpack straps aren’t even even. Speaking of his backpack, he has some pins and patches on there that are 90% gifts from his brothers and 10% ones he found on the ground. His skateboard on the bottom is a drawing he did by himself, and was one of the first pieces he ever did without copying something. Not super intentional, but his shell design sort of looks like a firework going off, which I think matches his personality a whole lot. The tooth he has missing is a permanent tooth and he honestly doesn’t care that it’s missing he thinks he looks cool.

1,300+ words later, you deserve a Turtle Tot design so here you go!!

[algernoninwonderland]

So, Queen Banana. It was… Okay, I think.

Every “fun” scene worked really well, and everything else… Not so much. I wanted to like it but ended up not feeling strongly about it in any way.

The Good:

They remembered that Marinette was a fashion designer, for once.

It builds on Sole Crusher! André’s love for moviemaking means he will use taxpayers’ money to make his dream come true… But he still can’t say no to his daughter. Consistent characterisation? In my episode of Miraculous? It’s more likely than you think!

The way Chloé’s ridiculous demands keep escalating. That great stupid car. Adrien in a cage lifted by a helicopter. It was neat!

More Nino looking done with everything. I love him.

They made the Akira motorbike slide reference and it was well-executed. They didn’t half-ass it and I appreciate that.

The bit in front of the Sorbonne actually feels like Paris, it’s not the same three buildings copy-pasted over and over again! And it’s nice.

Vesperia’s transformation sequence rings true to Zoé’s character. Also she probably watched Sailor Moon when she was little because she’s got, err, familiar poses!

The fight in general, Queen Banana’s design and all. It was a fun one! Everything moved nicely and was decently choreographed. The lucky charm was pretty nice!

Adrien’s attempt at confronting Chloé. It’s nice that he’s trying to stay true to his words.

The Bad:

That weird white guy with the grey hair and a face that seems completely divorced from the show’s art style. Who is that guy? Who knows. Are we supposed to know? Why is he here? It’s probably for a good reason but I feel like I’m missing some important info here.

A fluctuating rendering and animation quality throughout the episode.

If you so badly want to put yourself in your own show, be either somewhat discreet about it like Dana Terrace, or fun about it like Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer. Anyone else could have taken That Guy’s place and it would have worked just as well.

The student film doesn’t look any different from a regular episode outside of the props used, it’s shot the same way, with the same video resolution and colour grading. The conceit is interesting but in practice, it doesn’t really work. Sure all the extras are kids from the school, but it’s already the case in most episodes, sooo…

Chloé is back to being portrayed as a one-dimensional character. Which is fun, mostly, but also a downgrade. This time, her reasons for behaving the way she does aren’t nearly as interesting as in the episode just before. The show could have focused on her wanting to be Queen Bee again but they already did back in season 3, so she’s just motivated by spite and jealousy, and yet the show has nothing interesting to say about that.

Real life locations tend to look okay and feel like “real” places. The rooftops and regular streets… Still don’t. It’s the same assets copy-pasted over and over again and my pattern-finding monkey brain hates that.

Zoé’s character arc came to an end in this one, she hasn’t much to do, and while she’s still a pretty okay character, she’s not as interesting as she was in Sole Crusher. Or rather she isn’t made to be as interesting. The episode should have focused on her a bit more for that final scene to work. They really want us to like her but aren't putting in the work to make her more than “nice” and that's a bit disappointing.

Chat Noir tries to be smooth and it comes off as bizarre and awkward but not intentionally, episode number I’ve lost count.

They paid writers animators and voice actors to have a scene in which Chat Noir and Plagg say, “wow, this character sure is better than this other character”. And, like, dude, if your directing is strong enough, which it should be, the audience can come to that conclusion without being told that explicitly.

The heavy-handedness of the parallel between the student film and the sisters' relationship. Liken I get that it's a show aimed at small kids but come on.

The Ugly:

In Sole Crusher, I was relieved to see that they didn’t go down the “see how much better than Chloé Zoé is” route, or rather, there was some nuance to that. Yeah. Well Queen Banana has no nuance whatsoever.

“Perhaps it will help Chloé become a better person”. This entire final scene feels insincere and hollow. To the viewer, it’s obvious that Chloé won’t change because nothing in the episode suggests that she will. It’s empty. A scene should never be empty.

I don’t know… This one had some good moments in it but outside of Queen Banana herself, nothing stood out for me. It wasn’t awful, merely okay. But hey, okay is better than aggravatingly bad!

[psychedelic-lemur]

geez sorry i forgot about these

1. i agree. a book that's generations old must have tons of pages and weigh several kilos.

lmaoo every cooper's like "the hell is this??" fantastic👏

2. he's really living up to his apathetic essence i would say.

3. historically accurate👌 he most likely wore makeup too since that was very common

4. thoughts on TiT? this is gonna be a bit longer answer

TiT has its pros and cons. I like the worlds and the little extra details, for example the health bar logos. Each character has a very personalized logo with accessories, glowing eyes etc.

The worlds feel a little more alive than in the other games. I also like how the player is able to move around in the hideout and take a part in the activities in it. The treasures can be collected & viewed instead of being sold immediately.

Some of the ancestors (rioichi, tennessee, galleth) turned out quite good. It's a shame how salim got downgraded from his original design and what comes to bob? well let's not talk about that... and poor carmelita, let's not forget about her. Her whole character got butchered and sexualized in TiT and i will never forgive sanzaru for that.

The villains were not the best either. El jefe should have been something else than a tiger, toothpick was weird af and his ability was so far-fetched, i've already criticized grizz, ms. decibel.. just why, penelope deserved way better than this

and finally le paradox. i don’t know how i feel about him. I do like the fact that he's a skunk and his thing is hazardous smells or something. I don't like his design that much and it doesn't fit the whole thief demeanor. Also, he doesn't strike as a thief to me, at least not a one who' s from a long line of thieves too like sly is. I feel like that was just made up for the sake of some cheap plot.

it's been a while since i played TiT, so i probably missed something. But those were some of my thoughts.

Thanks for the asks!

[baebeyza]

Top 4 or 5 I dunno

Am bored so imma just list my faves for characters who have at least 4 different versions in the cartoons

(this was more than I expected, so it's under the cut-)

Shockwave!

1. TFP (Just a fucking pissy and spiteful babe with the sexiest design) 2. Energon (jerkiest jerk ever) 3. TFA 4. G1 5. Cyberverse

Soundwave!

1. TFP (My brother's favourite transformer, that gotta mean something) 2. G1 3. Cybertron (I'd love him more if he wasn't in like, 6 episodes total) 4. Headmasters 5. Cyberverse

TFA Soundwave just aint sexy, I am sorry- and neither is RID15 Soundwave after his upgrade u.u WFC Soundy just didn't do much

Prowl!

1. RiD01 (Middle child) 2. Energon (a little eager boyo) 3. TFA 4. G1 5. WFC

Only reason I chose WFC over Cyberverse here is that I fucking forgot he even was in Cyberverse, so he obviously couldn't leave a big impression on me

Ratchet!

1. TFP (Especially that german voice OuO) 2. WFC 3. TFA 4. G1 5. RiD15

Putting RiD15 Ratchet above Cyberverse Ratchet because he says "I needed that" :D Also, in Prime Wars he seems to exist because Windblade mentions him once, but we never see him

Roddy!

1. G1 (Original boi) 2. Energon 3. Prime Wars 4. Cyberverse 5. TFA

Headmasters Roddy gets no place in this for just fucking off and never coming back-

Ultra Magnus!

1. G1 (love of my life) 2. WFC 3. RiD01 (the bitch version-) 4. Headmasters 5. TFP

Fun fact: In the japanese version of Armada he exists as well, but not really as a character, just as an upgrade for Prime in the last season of the show that just existed for some reason - in the english version that upgrade is called Overload :D (but sometimes gets called Ultra Magnus too because the english script writers for the show were kinda high or something)

Oh, and in TFA I aint all that hype for him

Hot Shot!

1. Cybertron (A cutie) 2. Energon (A mature cutie) 3. Armada (I don't even care about this boi, but I can't put him below the other two) 4. RiD01 (I can't remember anything he ever did) 5. TFA (I couldn't even remember him existing)

Arcee!

1. G1 (Original girl) 2. TFP 3. Cyberverse 4. WFC 5. Energon

She's also in Headmasters as a secretary - a downgrade from G1. And in TFA she didn't leave much of an impression on me :/

Wheeljack!

1. Cyberverse (Such crazy uncle energy) 2. Energon (He's only called Wheeljack in original version - and I fucking loved the way he talked man, his voice and accent were just so damn epic) 3. TFP 4. G1 5. WFC He is in TFA, but I can't remember anything he ever said in those 3 minutes of screentime

Perceptor!

1. Prime Wars (Of course, he was so cute and funny!) 2. G1 (Cutie!) 3. Cyberverse 4. Victory (his one job of telling Ginrai he cannot be repaired was better than anything he ever did in TFA - at least he had a damn on-screen job! xD) 5. TFA

Some Minicon in Armada is called Perceptor, but bugger me if I fucking remember which one it was

Grimlock!

1. RiD15 (Fave of the whole show, such a sweetheart! <3) 2. G1 3. Prime Wars 4. Cyberverse 5. TFA

Rid01 also has a Grimlock, but he ain't even a Dino in it

Bumblebee!

1. RiD15 (A sin, I know, but I'm not hot on Bee in general and I just found this one the most appealing) 2. Cyberverse 3. TFP 4. G1 5. TFA

I know he's in RB, but I havent watched that yet so I can't talk

Sky/Jetfire!

1. Cybertron 2. Energon 3. Armada (one of the only two characters I actually liked in the whole show-) 4. G1 5. WFC

TFA version wasn't all that hot to me

Megazarak/Scorponok!

1. Energon (a goodie) 2. Headmasters 3. Beast Wars 4. WFC 5. RiD15

Bro I remember nothing about him in G1, that 4th season was so damn forgettable and weird, that even the RiD15 version stuck to me more

Fortress Maximus!

1. Headmasters (Master SWOOOORD- <3) 2. Prime Wars 3. RiD01 4. G1 (I can remember this version better than Scorponok at least)

Sideswipe!

1. RiD15 2. Armada 3. G1 4. WFC

As with Bee, can't judge his RB version

Blurr!

1. G1 (BOI) 2. TFA (handsome boi!) 3. Cyberverse (I just remember that he dies) 4. RiD15 (Just here because I liked him more than in Armada) 4. Armada (he aint even boi, but he has the name so whatever)

He's in Headmasters too and he fucks off with Roddy, so SHAME ON YOU

Cyclonus!

1. G1 (The only version I give a shit about- the others are just a contest about which I care less) 2. Energon 3. Armada 4. RiD15 5. TFA

Headmasters Cyclonus gets disqualified for the AUDACITY TO BE A WHIMP!

Galvatron! (disclaimer - versions that are really just Megatron-repaints don't count. Also for the Unicron Trilogy, I go by the japanese versions because I hate the english one when it comes to him and Megatron)

1. Energon (In japanese, its always Galvatron from the start, the character never was "Megatron" and bro do I love him!) 2. G1 (The original crazy man, you go babe! 3. Beast Wars II 4. Headmasters 5. WFC (Hope he gets to be awesome in Kingdom! ~)

Unicron!

1. Beast Wars Neo (personality babey) 2. TFP 3. Prime Wars 4. G1 5. Armada (at least he had Sideways here) I mean he is in Energon, but is barely a character...

Red Alert!

1. Cybertron 2. G1 3. Armada 4. WFC 5. TFA

Fun fact: Energon Prowl is Red Alert in japanese and Armada Red Alert is Ratchet in japanese-

Skywarp!

1. G1 (Aesthetics ~) 2. Beast Wars II (totally different character btw, but again - Aesthetics ~) 3. Cyberverse (girl Aesthetics ~) 4. WFC 5. TFA (anti-aesthetics!)

There be a lot of seekers in Prime Wars, but they all die without ever showing a robot-mode so who gives a fuck man

Thundercracker!

1. Cyberverse (It's the moe-effect) 2. Cybertron 3. G1 4. TFA 5. WFC

Thrust!

1. Beast Machines 2. Beast Wars II 3. Armada 4. G1 5. Cyberverse (Couldn't remember him in this thing either)

The Quintessons!

1. Energon (Alpha Q Disney Princess) 2. G1 3. WFC 4. Cyberverse

Alpha Trion!

1. G1 (This is the only version I have spent any thoughts on-) 2. TFA 3. Cyberverse 4. WFC 5. Headmasters

Man, at least in Headmasters he had a body compared to TFP-

Metroplex!

1. Cybertron 2. Headmasters (just for that one scene in which he says that Magnus would have wanted to be buried on Earth) 3. Prime Wars 4. G1

Jazz!

1. G1 2. TFA 3. RiD15 4. Headmasters (mah man Marshall, eh?)

Scourge!

1. Cybertron 2. RiD01 3. G1 4. Headmasters

Cliffjumper!

1. Energon (Character is called Overdrive in japanese but whatever) 2. TFP 3. G1 4. TFA 5. WFC (forgot he was in it)

Ironhide!

1. Energon (The boi) 2. G1 3. RiD01 4. TFA 5. WFC (5 seconds or something)

Omega Supreme!

1. Energon 2. G1 3. TFA 4. WFC

Laserbeak!

1. TFP (Of course-) 2. G1 3. Cyberverse 4. RiD01 5. Cybertron

Sorry, WFC Laserbeak u.u And who cares for Armada Laserbeak-

Mirage!

1. Energon (the Decepticon who is IN LOVE WITH MEGS/GALVS, what more do you want! Also he cute-) 2. RiD01 3. G1 4. WFC

Chromia!

1. Cybertron (In japanese Thunderblast's name is Chromia- forgive me not sticking to one language here x'D) 2. WFC 3. G1 4. Cyberverse

Menasor!

1. RiD15 2. Prime Wars 3. G1 4. Cybertron

Bulkhead!

1. TFA 2. TFP 3. Energon (Sprung in japanese) 4. RiD15

[osakasshitpit]

I love Final Fantasy XIV

So I’ve been playing Final Fantasy XIV, and after playing for around 180 hours, I haven’t even finished A Realm Reborn. Normally, 180 hours is an insane time frame for a game to manage and hold my attention. Persona 5 Royal was 180 hours of game time, and that was slowly outstaying its welcome. FFXIV must be doing something right, because just recently I went to a convention and bought a Y’shtola Keychain in a heartbeat. I haven’t had time to play XIV a lot prior to this, since I was stupidly grinding Praetorium for days and got burned out. I haven’t played much in 2 months, and Y’shtola only really has a minor role during A Realm Reborn’s Storyline. Despite that, I started in Limsa and Y’shtola stuck with me since then. I just had to buy that keychain. My girlfriend asked me about it and despite me staying away from the game after being burned out, I explained to her in great enthusiasm why I loved Y’shtola and why I loved the game so much. I think that’s the first time I really realized how attached I was to this world, these characters, this game.

I came to FFXIV after having played WoW from Vanilla through WotLK, after having barely ever touched a MMO since quitting WoW. Honestly, I was very skeptical of XIV but holy fucking shit did it ever win me over. They are completely different games, mind you, but that is a good thing in my opinion.

So here is the longest tumblr rant post I have written so far, I think.

To be fair, the first 20 levels or so were kinda slow. You get thrown into the deep end and get bombarded with lore and characters, terms and phrases that you don't understand. For fucks sake, the opening cutscene shows Louisoix fighting Bahamut front and center. Its this big, epic moment of sacrifice, but to someone who has not played 1.0 and who doesn't know anything about the lore, this just zips right past you. During the main story of ARR, they keep talking about Louisoix and how important he is, but you haven't even seen the guy because he died before the game even started. I only really realized this today, it took me 180 hours and a look at the wiki to connect the dots. It really is a slow burn, but that slow burn was okay because everything else was so fantastic.

While the world can arguably be more subdued than Azeroth in parts, there is still this distinctive style that I quickly fell in love with. It’s fantastical, but it still feels grounded. Part of that has to do with how the game introduces you to the world, and how the main story quests explain to you the lore bit by bit. I feel like much of the world design of WoW was down to “the rule of cool”. Now, I’m not saying XIV doesn’t have that, but I feel like XIV always goes the extra mile to explain why this cool shit is here. Everything you see out there in the world feels like it has a purpose, a reason to be there and an explanation on how it works. The factions make sense, the political conflicts you get entangled in are believable. I feel like I am kind of biased to be honest. What got me to play FFXIV in the first place was seeing that Viera are a playable race. I’m a sucker for Final Fantasy, not in short part to my memories of Playing Final Fantasy Tactics and XII. XII is still my favorite game in the series, and much of that has to do with the world, Ivalice. Viera were always my favorite race of the ones seen in Ivalice. Seeing as you can play a Viera in XIV, I just had to try. Thinking about it, XII and XIV have a lot in common when it comes to world building.

One of the weirdest things to acclimate for me was how FFXIV handles story. I was used to WoW, where story was basically non-existent and you did what you did to see numbers rise and to unlock now content you could do. You are basically never involved in the story of WoW, you are just kind of there for the ride. In FFXIV, you are the main character. You are involved in what happens at all times, and that is kinda strange coming from WoW. At first I thought I wouldn’t like it, but the game made it work in my opinion. I also didn’t expect there to be so much of story to begin with. Kind of ironically the moment I realized just how much there was to experience was when I went through Ul’dah and saw a blue quest. Now, blue quest markers mean there is some content you can unlock by doing this quest. A lot of these are kinda short, with a bit of dialogue and some bits of lore for you to enjoy and I thought this one would be no difference. After all, the hook is basically just to help this lady mourn for the death of a friend. What I got was a fabulous detective adventure that spanned over the entire continent, where in I had to help the worlds most manly detective uncover the secret behind a mysterious phantom thief. To say the least, this 21 quest long quest line brought be hours upon hours of joy and had me in stitches throughout. And it was completely optional. I don’t think I even remember a single moment from any quest in WoW that made me this excited for it, optional or otherwise.

Ultimately these are very different games that try very different things.

Dungeons and Raids were a different thing. I remember when I rolled a new character for WotLK and wanted to do karazhan because I used to like doing that raid with my guild back in TBC. I could not for the live of me find a group willing to do it, because everyone was way more focused on the new content, so they could get better gear. Regardless, it just wouldn’t have been the same experience anyways I fear, because the new gear from the new Dungeons outclassed the raid gear from TBC, so karazhan would be way easier and a much different experience. In FFXIV, every dungeon is level synced by default, meaning if a higher level character joins, they get basically downgraded to the level the dungeon was designed for. Couple that with the Duty Roulette feature and suddenly, there was always someone to do any given dungeon with. I remember when I had to do the crystal tower raids and thought “why would they tie main story progression to a raid, I will never find a group to do that properly” but low and behold, I found a group within 30 minutes or less and raided through the entire set of raids within a day. Dungeons and Raids are generally a very pick up and play thing in FFXIV. To be fair, dungeons got easier and more pick up and play in WoW too, but Raids were always the endgame thing where you had to gear up and learn to play. In FFXIV, much more lenient. No corpse walking required. I say this, but I have yet to do the Coils of Bahamut or any Savage Raids. I have only heard that there is plenty of hardcore raid content for those who want that.

That’s nothing to say about the actual gameplay. FFXIV is a tab-target MMO, like so many others, but it manages to keep this kind of gameplay fresh by introducing a lot of mechanics that make the game more active than the typical “I stand here and hit my rotation a lot”. For starters, most enemies have special abilities that you can actually dodge by moving out of the way. There will a area marker on the floor and everyone within that area will be hit. It starts out easy, but later dungeons really start kicking your ass with this mechanic. You really need to say on your toes. In addition, every class is extremely different. They all have special mechanics unique to them, special meters and resources they will have to manage during combat and so on. For example, a Red Mage (the class I’m playing currently), has two meters that fill up as you cast spells. They generally have two types of spells, white and black magic. Each type fills its respective bar. Once they are both full enough, you can go in and do a more powerful melee rotation. However, if one bar is fuller than the other, the other bar will fill up slower. Since you need to fill both, you want to balance that out. You get instant casts for spells after performing a damaging spell, and you have some spells with a short cast time and good damage output that you want to cast and then use the instant cast of to cast a more damaging spell that has a long cast time. But these short cast, good damage spells require a you get from casting a spell of the respective type. So, in essence, you want to balance your use of black and white magic, but you also want to use the proc you get from casting your white and black magic, which means you cast more of the type which inherently unbalances your gauges. It becomes this micromanagement game you play with your procs and instant casts, so you can go in and do the big, flashy sword combo. And that’s just the red mage at around 50. Every class has something like this, and it’s all unique to them. Learning a class is not just learning the rotation and spells you have anymore, it’s really learning how to effectively play your class. Also, positioning. Some abilities do more damage from certain positions, so you will have to dance around an enemy to hit all the sweet spots with classes like monks. These complexities get introduced slowly as you level up, so you have plenty of time to learn the mechanics. My favorite feature might be the class system itself, though. In FFXIV, you aren’t limited to one class for the entire duration of your characters career. You can, from a certain point forwards, choose any class you wish and level that up instead. You can freely switch between classes outside of combat, too. If you are dedicated enough, you can level them all up to max, even. This means if you don’t like a class or the direction a class is going in, you can switch. I for my part started as an arcanist, so I unlocked Summoner at 30. I played Summoner up to 50 but I was just not meshing as well with the direction the summorer went in. So, I switched to Red Mage and after some getting used to, Its now my new favorite. Arcanists are special, because you actually unlock two classes at 30, so I also unlocked Scholars. Scholars are healers and that became my main dungeon class, since queue times are way shorter for healers. This would be unthinkable in WoW, and love the fact this is a thing here.

If I had to describe it, WoW is an MMO with RPG Elements, while FFXIV is a JRPG with MMO elements. I didn’t know I needed that, but in retrospect, it makes sense. The thing that really killed my progress in WoW was that I didn’t have anyone to play with anymore. My friends all dropped from the game and while I generally like doing solo content from time to time, I’m pretty introverted, after all... MMORPGs are usually most fun with friends. Final Fantasy XIV is a JRPG first, an MMO second. There is so much to keep your attention as a solo player, its nuts. All my friends who play this game, play on a different data center, so I can’t even visit them. Despite that, I had a lot of fun in my time with the game.

My experience with the game was incredibly positive, and I don’t think it will get worse from here. Everyone keeps telling me how great Heavensward is. I just have to finish 16 more quests and I’ll be able to see for myself what the fuss is about.

Honestly, if I had to say anything negative, it would be how longwinded ARR is. I mean, its not bad by any means, but I can see how someone could be turned off by this huge storyblock. Worst of all is, after you hit 50 and reach the end of ARR’s story line, there are 80 quests before you can even start with Heavensward. Since everyone keeps going on about how great it is, it’s kind of annoying how long you have to work to even get to it. In retrospect, it kinda makes sense though. These quests are meant to be played over months and months throughout a update cycle and bridge the narrative gap between one storyblock and the next, but holy fucking shit why did it have to be THAT long. They even cut like 20 of the quests from this already insanely long quest line. What the fuck. This is supposed to be an epilogue to ARR and it feels like I played a whole fucking JRPG in between ARR and Heavensward. Oh well. Thankfully, they learned from this and made the post-story blocks shorter.

I will just say that I can recommend this game. You should give it a try. Just... try not to drop the game before it gets really, really good.

[emmys-grimoire]

Hypothetical OM! Angel Hierarchy

Not official or completely factual. 90% my hypothesis/conjecture supported with evidence of varying levels of confidence.

It might be helpful for those who may find it difficult to keep track of who falls under what rank and what those ranks may mean, because it’s definitely confusing. Aaaand we’re likely to get more lore dumps if Season 3 is meant to give us insight on what happened before, during, and immediately after the Great Celestial War.

There will be spoilers.

(It’s here if tumblr resized it to make it unreadable gg guys)

A magnificent MS paint chart and a hot take: ranks = jobs/roles, and one is not necessarily considered better than the other. Compared and contrasted with this.

Explanation/Conjecture/Theories tl;dr

The ranks outside of the Seraphim may be categorical - therefore lateral - and determined more by the nature of an angel's power or talents when they are born more than the amount of power or potential each angel possesses (as explained by Luke in Lesson 43). This would explain how you get Lucifer and Michael placed in the Archangel rank, which is typically the second to last rank in the traditional angel hierarchy, when they're both clearly much more powerful and hold much more authority than the rest of the angels (and, at least in Lucifer’s case, has three pairs of wings -- a trait associated with Seraphim). Their talents lie in combat, so they're filed under "Archangel".

Other possible explanation: the Archangels are typically low level grunts but Lucifer’s/Michael’s/Simeon’s status as Seraphim as well elevate them higher in status than they normally would be.

There does seem to be hierarchies within these hierarchies, too: Levi is a general, which implies greater authority than your average soldier, and Lucifer and Michael are clearly the head honchos. Michael is the current leader of the Legion. Hopefully this isn’t terribly relevant in the future lest things get even more convoluted. 

The Seraphim are clearly the 'ruling class', but they're promoted from the lower ranks, and it seems by recommendation. Beelzebub, a Cherubim, is rumored to be recommended for promotion by Lucifer (though he dismisses it). Think of it like giving the Attorney General a seat at the Important People Table; he still keeps his title and job.

Additionally, Beel is one of the weaker brothers in term of power... unless he somehow got a power downgrade after he fell and became a demon. Until there’s some indication of that, though, I’m confident that rank =/= how powerful the angel is, at the very least.

Admittedly calling it a promotion implies he’s changing his rank instead of just getting a new batch of responsibilities/more status. But re: what I said about Lucifer/Michael, it just might put Beel ahead of the other Cherubim in status and authority.

The Archangels are likely given more influence than they traditionally would because the Celestial Realm is in perpetual war with the Devildom until Diavolo takes over. I can see them getting more clout and status because they are in charge for most of that time, and that's likely why most of the Seraphim listed are also Archangels.

Mammon went from Archangel -> Throne, and it seems to be a duty change and little else. He’s called the “Fallen Warrior” so it makes sense. It also makes sense for Lucifer to appoint him to an administrative job underneath him instead of keeping him an Archangel if the warring has ceased in the foreseeable future. 

I've placed an * next to the characters whose ranks haven't been explicitly stated in the story yet, but they're placed where they're most likely to go based on descriptions so far. Raphael is the archangel associated with healing: it's a little strange that he's being depicted as a hunter with a spear, but he could be the Legion's equivalent of a head medic or something. Levi is clearly stated to be a general, so he's in the Legion, and likely remains there in some capacity even if he’s angsting no longer getting to fight.

There has been no official "council" confirmed, but the game has hinted that Michael has been in meetings and Belphegor is chastised for sleeping in and missing a meeting, so I suspect the Seraphim operate like one anyway... or there’s just meetings for different angel departments. Who knows? I’m calling them the Council of Assholes for now.

We still don't know what Asmodeus or Belphegor are, though the former seems to work under Raphael. This doesn't really mean much: Simeon clearly works for Michael when they're technically both Archangels and Seraphim.

We haven’t heard anything about the Powers or Virtues yet. Maybe that’s where Asmodeus/Belphegor fall but idk. Their job description may be more dubious as a result.

Father clearly sits at the top of this ladder, but the game gives us precious little insight on how he operates or what his motivations are. There’s probably a reason why he designed things this way, but that has yet to be revealed. Not sure if the Devildom has anything that would be considered this equivalent and we’ve hung out there for two seasons now.

I 100% expect some of this to turn out to be wrong and I'm gonna have to make some corrections/edits. The fact that Mammon mocks Luke for his low rank (before he clarifies that he’s actually unranked) makes me think it probably isn’t all lateral job assignments and even this is way too simplified.

But this is where I’m at. Cheers.

(Also Luke doesn’t technically exist in the past timeline)

[clamityganon]

Aww that’s cute. Honestly darling, if you’d come to my inbox, I would’ve 100% done it. I actually thought nobody really liked the first meta/analysis-- that it was just me screaming into the void-- but I guess not which is pretty sweet! :D Now enough of me talking, let’s go for round two:

Reggie Looks At: Donna Troy’s Suit (Again)

If you haven’t read my last meta, I’m going to re-state my credentials again to proving my own legitimacy: roughly half a year of bojutsu (bo staff fighting), a year of karate, and two years of muay thai. Today I’ll just be complaining about everything I find stupid about this suit right here from a martial arts perspective:

Head: Humans like headshots. They like to punch noses and poke eyes. Please get my girl Donna T some good headgear. Nicola Scott’s Nightwing has a good example of headgear that I’d like to see on more vigilantes. ALSO, I didn’t say this last time, but having your hair whipping around your face while fighting is BAD. It obstructs your vision, it takes time to brush out of your eyes, and if someone’s willing to play dirty (like, literally every DC villain ever) they can grab a fistful of your hair and drag you around. Every version of Donna with long hair should probably think about tying it back in a bun or something.

Shoulders: SHE HAS SHOULDER PADS!!! Shoulder protection is something I value so so so much after I got mine messed up. Albeit, these pads are a little on the bulkier side for me (they look a harder to move in) but hey, she’s got them! The straps look nice and secure, so good for Donna! Even though they’re not the best for a martial artist, I prefer these shoulder pads so much more than the ones New 52 design (is she trying to poke someone’s eye out with her shoulder there?) and I prefer them to not having shoulder pads at all. Overall, I’ll give it a 6/10.

Arms: The upper arms have nothing on them which is nice but I propose having some sort of fabric covering them for less chafing against the straps of the shoulder pads). Going down to the elbows; no elbow pads. I’m a little disappointed, but not really surprised. Like I said last time, in muay thai the elbow is the strongest part of the body and the elbow strike is the deadliest move in the whole sport. Since elbows are so important to general arm function and fighting people, having protection there would be a logical move.  Moving on down to the forearms and; *sigh* They’re back at it again with the metal armbands, aren’t they? Look, I like the idea of the armbands and protecting the part of the arm which you block with, but these are so... heavy. I know the metal armbands are an iconic stylistic choice to Donna Troy’s character (like many other Amazonian characters), but they just look so heavy and bulky I can’t help but frown whenever I see them while in analysis mode. So overall I’d say you should thin out the shoulder pads, add elbow pads, make the forearm bands lighter, and add sleeves to her suit.

Torso: Dude! They her some got chest support! Yes, it looks stiff, but she’ll finally be able to spare her chest from pain! No more fanservice 2021, only practicality! However... while I do appreciate chest support, it looks very restrictive around her abs/core. While fighting you twist around so having your stomach and back stuck in one position isn’t exactly fun. As for the hips, they’ve downgraded. Instead of a sash, Donna now has an entire metal belt. As someone who’s done muay thai, I’ll tell you that I’d really rather not have anything around my hips since you move them with every strike. Having metal around Donna’s hips is not only impractical but it could actually really hurt her if she messes up a move or something like that. So: keep the chest support, make the lower half fabric, and get rid of that awful belt.

Legs: I like this. Nothing on her legs, nothing restricting her movements, and nothing digging into her skin while she kicks. I don’t know if she’s wearing kneepads in this because the art style is very boxy but if she isn’t I suggest adding them to her because (like I said last time) knee injuries don’t fuck around. Down at the shins, I see the boots serve as protection. I know last time I looked at Donna’s suit I said I wanted some shin guards on her, but I really don’t like this form of protection. In fact, it’s better to not have any than wear these boots.

Feet: *disgusted noises* Alright now let’s look at why I hate those thigh high boots. Those thigh high... silver boots. Not only is that ridiculously expensive, but there’s no mobility in these things! Look at her ankles! She wouldn’t be able to rotate them at all! Not even to mention that metal is slippery. The soles of these boots are in no way flexible. And since they’re metal I can only imagine how heavy they might be on her legs. You honestly might as well be making her fight in a ski boot that extends up to under her knees. And these boots look... suspiciously like wedge heels (or not. I don’t know, I’m no heel expert). I said this last analysis, but martial artists like to have good footing on whatever they’re standing on. If you’re off-balance it puts you at a HUGE disadvantage. Heels are hard on your knees, and the weight distribution looks off. Get rid of the whole boot. In fact I hate it so much, I’d give her my own Ultraboost 20s or something. They’re even black, so it’ll match.

Tagging everyone who got tags last time: @woahjaybird @river-bottom-nightmare @screennamealreadyused @catxsnow @pricetagofficial​ annnnd @subtleappreciation​ :))​

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael in the Mainstream: Crash Bandicoot

Reviewing video games is not my forte. Like, sure, I can review the Metal Gear franchise because it’s near and dear to my heart and it’s incredibly story driven to a cinematic degree, but I’m not super good at touching on game design or any of that. I stick with movies. But then there are a lot of games I love and want to talk about, such as this game, Crash Bandicoot, and it’s like, how do I talk about this? This is a platformer that is very light on plot and is more about precision platforming than anything, and I’m just not really good at talking about gameplay.

But I’ve come up with a solution! One that I plan to use going forward for a few other games, too! I’ll start with a few paragraphs with my basic overview of the game, and then I will do a ranking of my favorite levels, and then how I’d rank the bosses. I’m much better at talking why I enjoy the challenge of specific elements of games like these then I am talking about the game as a whole, so let’s see how this turns out.

Crash Bandicoot was the first video game I ever played, and so is extremely near and dear to my heart. It’s a rather simple game, a “save the girl” platforming adventure in the vein of something like Mario, where an intrepid hero travels through platforming challenges to save the love of his life from an evil mastermind, though as the main character is a furry animal with a bit of 90s ‘tude, and his archenemy is a mad scientist who utilizes cyborgs to stop you, there’s a dash of Sonic in here too. Being a simple platforming game like this, you’d think there wouldn’t be all that much to the story… but surprisingly, that’s not totally the case (although the story is still relatively simple to later entries).

Crash was meant to be the ultimate soldier in Dr. Neo Cortex’s army of evil marsupials and other assorted critters, an army he presumably was going to use for world domination. After rigorous training, Crash was set to be brainwashed and turned into a mindless slave, but something got screwed up and Crash remained a good, heroic guy. He ended up chased out a window and washed up on the beach of a nearby island, and set out to save his buxom, big booty bandicoot babe Tawna from the creepy clutches of the cantankerous Cortex, causing chaos and crushing crates as he went along. The manual included with the original version of the game actually outlined sort of a little story for the first island, showing how the levels involved Crash infiltrating a native village, defeating its leader, and then riding a hog to escape on his way to the next island. It’s kind of fun and imaginative, and the next island keeps it up, with Crash having to brave ancient ruins to make it to the volcano on the other side of the island, before finally going through Cortex’s toxic power plant, causing a reactor meltdown, and climbing Cortex’s castle to confront him as his island burns to the ground. It’s a fun, simple story that’s not too challenging on the mind while still being engaging.

Perhaps the best thing about the game is the music, which was done by Josh Mancell with the assistance of Mark Mothersbaugh’s Mutato Muzika production company. Let’s not beat around the bush here: Every single track in this game slaps. Basically every track in the original trilogy slaps, but I feel pound for pound this game just hits all the right notes with its music. It perfectly sets the tone for each level, with eerie levels like Slippery Climb getting foreboding music and unsettling yet somewhat whimsical levels like Road to Nowhere getting music that perfectly suits it. This is the biggest downgrade of the remake; they redid the score, with no option to go back to the old tracks, and while some of the updated tunes are great, they don’t really hold a candle to the original (especially the creepier levels, which got dumbed down a fair bit to the point of narm).

The one thing this game is being known for these days is its pretty brutal difficulty, at least with the original release. A lot of the staple elements of the series like checkpoints saving the boxes you had previously broken and an actual save room were not present, so every level (including the brutal ones where the margin of error was incredibly slim) needed to be completed perfectly in one go. The challenging road to 100% completion was absolutely brutal, but thankfully the remake polished things and brought it more in line with its sequels to the point you only need a flawless run on colored gem levels. It can still be pretty tough since the colored gems are located in the hardest levels of the game, but it’s a lot easier than it once was.

The original game is a great, fun game, but only play the original release if you really want to test your skills; the remake is the way to go. The game holds up amazingly well even today, so no matter which version you end up playing you’re in for a fun platforming challenge.

Anyway, let’s get on to the levels!

TOP 10 LEVELS

10. Generator Room

There’s something to be said about the various one-shot themed levels of the third island. Toxic Waste is an interesting one we’ll talk about later, The Lab is a fun penultimate level, and Cortex Power is a frustrating slog of confusing backtracking. The Generator Room, though? This is unnerving atmosphere and dark ambience at its peak, with the eerie, minimalist music and the looming Cortex faces lending a chilling sense that you’re being watched as you make your way through this dark platforming challenge. It’s not the most exciting level, but among the one-shot themes it stands out for being a heaping helping of nightmare fuel… Though moreso in the original game. The remake sadly toned things down a bit too much, though it’s hard to blame them, really.

9. Native Fortress

The level that caps off the first island is a more challenging remake of The Great Gate, and closes out the story of the first island by showing how Crash escapes the territory of Papu Papu’s tribe. It’s a pretty fun and reasonable challenge for the point in the game, but my favorite aspect of the level has always been that, when you get the red gem, you get to fly up in the clouds and experience the painted background of the other two islands with less clutter. It’s just a simple background image, sure, but I have always found it very pretty and breathtaking.

8. Road to Nowhere

Everyone’s favorite! This is one of the more challenging levels if you don’t know what you’re doing because of the tricky and precise jumps you need, but it just has so much atmosphere and pleasant music it’s hard to get mad even if I screw up and plummet to my doom a few dozen times. Bouncing off of hibernating turtles to make long jumps and inexplicable evil hogs help make this memorable. Frankly, if you want to direct your ire to a stage, direct it to The High Road, the third island’s more challenging take on this level’s theme and which is a joyless, frustrating experience.

7. Castle Machinery

This level is honestly a bit of a breather for being so late in the game; sure, it has a lot of tricky jumps and an annoying crate bridge you need to really think about to conquer, but overall it’s just an improved take on Heavy Machinery without an obtuse branching path to figure out. Still, this level really makes the list because, if you have the right colored gem, you can just immediately skip the entire level and gain thirty free lives in the process in one of the single funniest moments in the game.

6. Toxic Waste

This level is simple, straightforward, and to the point. It’s one long-ass hallway where Crash is on a narrow walkway and has to avoid incoming barrels being tossed at him by the Mafia. It has no branching paths, no crazy elements, just Crash, some barrels, some boxes, and some bad guys. It’s almost too basic, but what saves it is the atmosphere of it all and the sheer awesomeness of the music, no matter which version you’re playing. It’s a level that has stuck in my mind since I was a kid. In a way, it also set the basis for colored gem unlocks in the games to follow, as avoiding the barrels is more of a puzzle than anything, much like the tricky puzzles you had to solve to unlock the colored gems in Cortex Strikes Back and It’s About Time. It’s a neat little first step even if it’s not quite there yet.

5. Boulder Dash

I almost didn’t include one of these levels, but God, these levels were trendsetters! The whole “Crash gets chased by dangerous thing” trend began in this game, and this second take on the boulder chase from the second island is a lot more fun and challenging than the earlier version of the level. And if you get the colored gem, you’re taken to a pretty underground alternate exit with tons of crates, which is pretty dope.

4. Fumbling in the Dark

The only one of the secret levels that requires a Cortex key to make the list, Fumbling in the Dark is a remix of Lights Out, the level it branches off of. That level is a bit of a cakewalk if you have the right gem, with an alternate exit being available to you before the level’s challenge ramps up. Not so with this level! You’ve gotta do some tricky timed jumps as quick as possible so you can get to the next Aku Aku mask before the light runs out. It’s a pretty fun and fair challenge, and it pushes my platforming skills to the limit. I also just really enjoy the creepy, Gothic aesthetic of the levels inside Cortex’s castle.

3. Hog Wild

This is, hands down, the funniest level in the game. From Crash’s really suggestive eyebrow waggle which leads to him tackling a pig to the extremely goofy music, this level is just an absolute blast. It does have an equally fun yet more challenging remix as an optional secret level, Whole Hog, but I have to give props to the original level for being the most hilarious thing I ever saw when I was little.

2. Slippery Climb

Where Stormy Ascent is a brutal, unrelenting challenge, Slippery Climb is more of a tough, but fair challenge. It’s definitely up there with Sunset Vista and The High Road in terms of difficulty, and the fact you’ve gotta do a flawless run of it if you want the red gem is daunting, but this is the most thoroughly rewarding mandatory level to conquer. You’re gonna feel really cool when you take this one down, guaranteed. Maybe not as much as when you take down Stormy Ascent, but still, this may be the toughest level in the game.

1. THE GREAT HALL

WOO YEAH BABY! LOOK AT THIS CHALLENGE!

Ok, ok, here’s the real number one:

1. N. Sanity Beach

This is the first level in the game and, thus, one of the easiest. And yet I placed it above all the levels I find to be more fun and challenging. Why? Well, for one, the pure nostalgia of it all. This was my first level in a video game, and I have fond memories of traversing the beach and jungle. For the other, this is one of the most perfect tutorial levels I have ever seen. Basically everything the game has to offer is laid out to you and slowly dished out to you: you start with a couple crates and a free life, move on to experience some enemies and pits, you can get total invincibility if you’re smart, you’re introduced to branching paths and backtracking… Everything is dished out to you at a solid pace so that any new player will be able to figure out what they’re doing with relative ease. Plus, the music slaps, and interestingly enough halfway through the level changes to a different song (the only level to do this). It really does encapsulate the game as a whole in one tiny package, and for that, I think it’s my favorite level of all.

Boss Ranking

The best way to describe the bosses in the original Crash is that they are incredibly basic. Most of them have simple patterns, easy tells, and don’t take much effort to take down. There’s not really anything here that will put your skills to the test, but none of them are really bad per se; in fact, considering how hard the levels can get, it’s sort of a breath of fresh air when you get to a boss that can be taken down without thinking hard.

6. Papu Papu

Coming in last place is our first boss, the big chief of the first island himself. He’s a pretty simple and straightforward boss battle: just jump on his head a few times and he’ll be out cold. It’s pretty nice to ease in new players, but it’s seriously not much of a challenge (though none of these bosses are particularly hard, mind you).

5. Koala Kong

So far, this has been Koala Kong’s sole major outing, as he was pretty quickly replaced with the more engaging Tiny Tiger in terms of dumb muscle.Tiny at least has some semblance of combat prowess and strategy, while this guy is just tossing boulders at you to spin back while he’s flexing and posing like he wants a part in the next volume of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. He’s certainly not the sharpest tool in the shed. Still, he’s not bad or anything, just a bit of a generic battle compared to the last three or the one before him.

4. Ripper Roo

Ripper Roo is a bit of a frustrating puzzle boss, requiring just the right timing to get in any damage on the guy. Still, the fun and bouncy music coupled with the amazing stock laugh does help make him a bit more memorable than the previous two bosses. I will say he’s probably worse in terms of an actual boss battle, because he ends up being more an exercise in precision than the typical dodging and waiting for the right moment to strike, but he’s also a funny kangaroo in a straitjacket, and I think that counts for something.

3. N. Brio

The longest boss in the game, Brio comes with a massive health bar that you’ll shave off pretty quickly for his first phase if you’re careful, and whose second phase features him hulking out into an incredible monstrosity. He’s simple and straightforward, much like all the bosses to be honest, but I think the bosses on the final island all have solid presentation to make up for that. Brio just comes out at the lower end, which is honestly a running theme for him in Crash games, as his battles are rarely the best out there and few can match his debut.

2. Pinstripe

Pinstripe may not be the most challenging boss in the world, but damn is he cool. A tommy gun-toting potoroo gangster who goes full-on Scarface and starts blasting up his office when you walk in while cackling like a madman? Awesome. Defeating him is also heavily implied to be the reason Cortex’s castle eventually starts burning down, as he accidentally shoots the generator upon defeat, which is a neat little touch. If nothing else, Pinstripe is just fun, and he has killer theme music to boot.

1. Cortex

Cortex begins his reign as the big bad of the franchise with a final boss battle that, while lacking in serious challenge, has such good music and presentation that it’s hard to really care. The fight is simple and straightforward: you dodge his blasts, and hit back the ones of a certain color so they blast his health off. All of this is done from atop his dirigible, as his island burns down in the background. The bosses just don’t get any cooler than this.