#and she was like why would you go get me that you didnt have to
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ithink the really striking thing here is that like they got thinner but they didnt get that much thinner in a way that counts. like either way from the bottom laptop to the top laptop that is still taking up ur entire laptop compartment in your backpack or in ur super cool gay leather briefcase (okay thats just me) it is not like you would be carrying more stuff if u had the thinner vs the thicker one, the lighter vs the heavier one.
i have owned a thick laptop (thinkpad t440) and a thin laptop (t490s, framework laptop) and there was never a moment ever where i broguht my thin laptop but would not have brought my thick one. both come to class, both come to coffee shops, both come on trains and planes, both sit unused in my backpack for way too long while i use my actual main pc lol. so like what was the point of the technological advancement that lead to this thinness? why not keep this thickness and improve everything else about it? like imagine the battery life and performance you could cram into a thick one with modern tech and you could give it such a big radiator that it wouldnt even need fans for 90 percent of everything. but instead of making the product better we spent most of our energy into making it thinner.
idk it just really showcases how useless this all was, how it was to sell thinner n thinner machines with no real purpose. like my mom hates windows machines in general and needs too many specific apps to use linux, but the issue is that new macbooks have a sharp edge on the keyboard, which cuts and scratches her arms and wrists as she uses it, and so she has to have a thicker machine that is actually designed well. why did we go this route? every year thinner after thinner after thinner and its like. what was the point? the framework laptop or a thinkpad are really the only reasonable laptop options if u want to h ave anything you can repair instead of throw away that is also comfortable to use and not some janky diy contraption. i have to go out of my way to find a phone with a headphone jack and like all th e options are years old or wayyy too expensive unnecessarily powerful 'enthusiast' phones who have like dedicated communities of old white men discussing exactly one product. and all the while we have these advancements and its like? for what? why do we need the thing to be 5% thinner and 5% lighter and 20% worse. its just such a blatant attempt to upsell year over year and while i think ppl are finally catching on (more due to wage stagnation than any like. shift in understanding.) it took way too long for it. at the same time we are lacking variety,. like all the goofy old laptop designs with some degree of 'charm' are gone. so its like. what are we left with? a bunch of same-y increasingly thin and sharp metal slabs with low travel keyboards for laptops n fragile glass sandwiches for phones with n+1 cameras compared to last year but less and less features?
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i did it last week so i'm doing it again; how we feeling about gempearl this session 6...
the divorce arc isn't even that angsty anymore it's just like, we are watching several minutes of two people who are so obviously obsessed with each other and are just being dumb (/lh) about it. i think that it's just so clear now that they both want to get back with each other but they just??? are stupid and gay????
gem wanting pearl to kill her in a 1v1 because she knows pearl is capable of doing it and, that way, she could start earning her forgiveness back but pearl just doesn't do it?? the whole "you got ants in your pants" "yeah, yeah they are named pearl"??? pearl so obviously trying to make gem jealous with the camel and gem responding so curtly???? the little "did you even look me in the face during our murder camel… happenings?" from gem?????
they are so bitter. they are so gay. they want each other in ways that are dangerous to the rest of the players. every single interaction thay have is charged with intense queer tension. i need them to have a homoerotic fight
you genuinely took all the words from my mouth I CANT EVEN START WITH THEM? its nearly embarrassing /lh its gem giving pearl so many chances to kill her before she gives up and goes over to skizzs place ??
and i get Why pearl didnt take the offer for a proper 1v1 between them. like out of ALL PEOPLE, pearl would be the one who would understand the need to prove your capabilities in a nice even match considering she has that same need with scott (that still has not been fulfilled imo lmao the pufferfish was nice but it probably still didnt satiate that urge for her)
BUT pearl is on yellow, and her self preservation instincts kick in and even if shed love to bury this hatchet with gem she has other goals in mind. (Gem on the other hand has a very different laid-back? attitude towards lives. shes confident surviving even on red and thinks other people should share the same sentiment)
and dont even get me started on the camels. smth smth never left the desert smthg smthg never got off that damn camel.
THEYRE SO BITTER. they both want things to go back to "normal" but normal to pearl is just the two of them as they are and normal to gem is back in SL when theyre both on their red life and its them vs the world ITS HORRIBLE!!! GET IT TOGETHER YOU TWO PLEASE FIGHT IT OUT ALREADY
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yall. my parents have recently been obsessed with caramel popcorn and we get it almost like around 3-4 times a month. yesterday we were out and we decided to try mixed flavours, but the dude at the cinema gave us less caramel ones, so my mom was upset.
today my mum was napping and my dad went to get her the damned caramel popcorn so they could have it for their tea time 😭😭😭
if that aint love, idk what is 😭
#she was o sleepy and i was waiting for her to look at it but she kept dozing off lmao#so then mydad grabbed a popcorn and was trying to shove it in her mouth cus hes very playful and he does that sometimes#and he was like 'eat this#eat this'#and my mum was frowning still eyes closed but she ate it and then was like 😦?#and she was like why would you go get me that you didnt have to#and my dad was cackling looking at me and i was like 🤭#stop this is so alkshafjdhd omgg 😭#ann loves her parents °♡°♡°♡°#ann rambles <3
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EDYN TIDESTRIDER, CHALLENGER OF THE UNDERSEA, RIVAL OF THE DEEP. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR BROTHER WAS CHOSEN TO BE A WEAPON OF THE GODS? HOW WILL YOU UNDO WHAT THEY HAVE DONE TO HIM?
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#edyn tidestrider#cw blood#EDYYYNNNN TTIDESTRIDERRR OHH HOW I LOVE HERRRR#THIS IS A PAGE FULLA REEAALLY OLD DOODLES AND REALLY REALLY OLD DOODELS AND NEW DOODLES. ENJOY.#ONLY CLEANED IT UP A BUNCH TTODAY AND IM ACTUALLY SO SO HAPPY W IT WEEEEE#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? DOWN IN THE UNDERSEA. TO VISIT YOUR BROTHER WHENEVER THE ADULTS WOULD LET YOU#A KID WHO DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS GOING ON OR WHY HER BROTHER WAS BEING TAKEN AWAY OR WHY HE KEEPS GETTING HURT#OR WHY THE ADULTS JUST KEEP LETTING IT HAPPEN. ITS FOR THE BEST? FATE OF THE WORLD AND ALL THAT? HEY WHO THE FUCK IS IN CHARGE HERE#HOW DO WE STOP IT. HOW DO I STOP IT. THERES PEOPLE OUT THERE WORKING ON SOMETHING. ARITIFICIAL LEVIATHAN YOU SAY?#WE COULD BUILD A THING TO RIVAL THE GODS. WELL. SIGN ME UP. IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU#WHAT A FASCINATING THING SHE ACTUALLY SAID. 'IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU' HELLO?? EDYN? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#WHAT EXACTLY DID THEY DO TO HIM. OTHER THAN THE PROPHECY TRAINING. YOU CAN UNDO THAT? YOU CAN UNDO ALL THAT? HOW?? HELLO???#LIKE SURE I JUST SPOUTED MY THEORIES I THINK SHE WANTS TO KILL GOD BUT THATS JUSTA THEORY... A GA#WHAT IS EDYNS GOAL AND WHY CANT SHE TELL ANYONE OOUUUHHH EDYNNNN CMERE EDYNN CMERRE STOP WALKING AWAY CMERE. COME HERE.#fuuuuuck shes so mysteriousss what is she HIDING!!shes also so so so so angry i fucken know she is. shes so gentle and so sweet and timid#but she is ANGRY and shes SMART and clearly shes AMBITIOUS bc shes TALKING TO THE FUCKING BIG HEAD HONCHO O THE FUCKEN NNAAAVYYYYY#ALSO WHO IS NICHOLAS. IF THATS EVEN HIS REAL NAME. WHO DID YYYOU MEET EDYN. DO YOU HAVE A WISH TO BE GRANTED EDYN???#CHEWING ON THE BARS O MY CELL I NNNNEEEEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT EDYN IM SO CURIOUS IMG ONNA KILL PEOPLE#i said once in another post 'the oath an eldest sister takes on is on par w that of a paladins-#-and sometimes upheld w the very same ferocity'. I REALLY LIKED THAT LINE.#pleeese... if u can hear me.. pls join me and draw edyn w unbridled plasmatic rage abt the way her brother was treated by the Elders#also pls draw her SCARY. I NEED HER TO BE SSCARY. PLEEASEE I NEED HER TO BE JUST AS VIOLENT AS GILLION BUT INA ICE COLD WAY#JUST AS VIOLENT JUST AS STRONG JUST AS MUCH OF AN AQUATIC MONSTER. im sure u see the vision.#ok i gotta go t bed now i got work in tha morning n i should nnot be stayin up this late. if u hav thoughts abt edyn pls scream abt em#okay byyyyeee goodniiigihhttttt
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Everyone thank @harvestandhearth for this ^^
Heads up, i’m going with intersex danny as ectoplasm exposure and presumed afab until he was able to clarify which gender he was (toddler) and chose his own name as Danny for this. Tim is still a nicu baby, and the two were presumed fraternal twins until a lot later.
And possible trigger warning, while not in Danny’s POV talking about what vlad did with the clones does trigger an episode to a degree, but this is all third POV with it being others’ observing Danny trying to ground himself after a stressor triggered something.
And as a personal headcannon, since Danny can turn parts of himself intangible, a nervous stim for him when he cant remove himself and go where he feels safe is to pull at his arteries or nerves—never managing it but passing through them as a target is soothing as its a tiny challenge, repetitive, and doesn’t hurt him but he can feel it happening so it helps ground himself after a trigger.
Timothy Jackson Drake nee Fenton pt2
Cyborg had two options with the news Red Robin and Phantom were twins: update the League files and let the paranoid bastards monitoring them find out that way, or telling them.
He did have a front row seat to the Dick and Kori’s disaster era many of them blame Dick for.
He updates Phantom and Red Robin’s files, links them as “twins raised apart geographically, and very attached emotionally” and let the cards fall where they may.
If Dick wanted to bring drama to the titans way back when, he can discover batfam drama on bis own time and away from Cyborg this time.
—
Tim was getting ready for patrol after his Call with Jazz and Dani. Danny crashed his pre-patrol routine to looking over possible redesigns from ghost fashionistas on a call.
The hooded cloak concept is popular and growing on Tim.
Apparently giving him a dragon as his callsign was also popular.
He was liking some of redesigns as different birds. Rook’s and Cardinal having a functional glider built in. Someone with the call mabychan didnt go too far off his current look, and it was possible to add the flight functions. The aesthetic addition of gold or yellow onto the suit proper rather than just his gear was interesting enough to explore later.
Danny continued to advocate for Tim playing with ecto-infused tech to be less trackable and was ignoring the very fact ecto signatures are very trackable and are transferable to people.
He was debating the winged cape-hood combo when his work phone kept going off.
“So, cutting this early again?”
“They can wait. Now, do you think maby could mix the hood and wing cape into her design? Like, my hair is wrong but it’s not far off from what i was going for, i think these two,” Tim grabbed his favorite Rook and Cardinal designs and lifted them to show Danny, “are a good reference for how i want the glider part to work.”
“I’ll contact her and see what she says,” Danny raised an eyebrow as his work phone began to flash red as it kept going off. “You gonna answer that or…”
“They’ll live, i’m not on the clock yet, and they interrupted my cases so many times this week with these stupid team building exercises. Like, hoe, i have a life outside of my two jobs, shut the fuck up and let me live!”
“You sure they aren’t a johnny-skulker hybrid?”
“Positive. They don’t hunt me for my pelt. Most of the time—Hood and mini Robin might if they have a mental break again.”
“Why have i not kidnapped you home sooner?”
“You respect my boundaries and are eviler for doing so.”
“Clearly, my evil-self solo-ed the Justice League and affiliates.”
“I’m still certain if i was alive, i would have beat evil you’s ass.”
“Dipshit, i would not have gone evil i would be a shaky chihuahua following your ass everywhere if any of my idiots didnt die in that accident.”
“Fair. So, i get Val, Anita, bart, Kon will try but he may run late with chores at the Kent’s, Cassie is coming, and against the odds you get to face an olympic archer too!”
“Oh my god, you guys could stand a chance if Dad’s aim doesn’t obliterate your points. How did you get Cissie to agree?”
“I told her Greta’s on your team and reminded her they were still tied for who was winning a bet way back when. Then called her a dick for deserting us in our time of need.”
“At least i don’t have to worry Slobo.”
“He’s on kiddo duty while we play.”
“So strategic sabotage.”
“You know me so well.”
“Evil, evil bastard brother!”
“Don’t talk about our mom like that.”
“I was talking about Aunt Janet.”
“Never mind, carry on.”
“Nah, but your phone is annoying me so—“ Danny shifted and Phantom burst out of his screen. “Ancients that sucked!”
Tim rolled his eyes as Danny bemoaned his latest fire walls.
“Use real fire ants next time, Ancients Damnit!”
“No.”
Danny snagged his phone as he reloaded his smoke pellets. “Now what does—holy shit. Did you not tell them you’re co-workers?”
“It was obvious—why do they think I turned down the family dinner invites unless Steph was there? I need bestie backup to handle their shit off hours.”
“Oh my god, you didn’t. They think you’re a Bat when you’re a fucking Fenton. Holy shit!”
“I never hid it,” Tim defended, “They’re detectives, they dan detect.”
Danny began wheezing, curled around the phone and cackling.
“…did B send anything yet?”
Danny shakily passed the phone. Tim ignored the group chat and looked to his private one with Bruce and Alfred.
“Cave. Now.”
“I was unaware of your living relatives Master Timothy. Do invite them over, we have much to discuss. From, Alfred Pennyworth”
Tim groaned, moving to put the last of gear in place.
“I was invited by your co-parent, I’m coming.”
“Chaos gremlin.” He waved Danny to follow him into the elevator, away from his (relatively) civilian quarters.
“You say that like you aren’t one too.”
“I hide it better, when it matters,” Tim shrugged. “Blame Aunt Janet’s social chameleon lessons.”
“Deceiver of all,” Danny narrated with the utmost dramatics as they exited the elevator. “be evil with your whole chest or be the Good Twin!”
“Fuck that. Now get your ass in gear, you’re riding Bitch.”
“Hey, if guys at school are going to keep calling me Fentonia, I believe I can say you gotta stop calling it that. Clearly I’m the tagalong and a snack.”
“Nope,” Tim readied Red Bird. “You smell like a bitch and look like shit. Why Val likes you, the world may never know.”
“Fuck you. And we share a face!” Danny got on behind him, ignoring the offered helmet.
“I wear it better and dont have baby fat. Safety first lab accident.”
“You look like that brainless dipshit from Oz, but boned,” Danny snapped as he put on the helmet and waiting for Tim to go.
“At least when I crossdress, it’s not a question of which gender I’m presenting as,” Tim grumbled as they sped out.
“Eat a cock, you know they thought i was a girl for a year.”
“I mean—“ Tim took a sharp turn out of the garage and merged into Gotham’s traffic .
“Abort, no sex stories from my twin this early—.”
“It’s 9 at night mostly ghostly.”
“—And did you forget i ate your fraternal twin in the womb and we became identical in a case of severe Gray’s Anatomy BS?”
“Look, the Nicu was A Lot, and with how much medical mystery shit our family has going on, can you blame me?”
“Yep. Medical mystery, magical mystery, family curse and Fenton Luck must be kept
Separate big brother, or are you getting sennial in your old age?”
“Fuck off.”
“And once again, your 9 pm is my 4 am. I’m a witching hour girlie, Reddicus Robininous.” Danny snarked as they sped outside of Gotham City proper into the Rich Bitch greenery and woods.
“I blame Pix,” Tim groaned.
“Beanie taught me that!”
“But Pix taught you to say it.”
“She did, she did.”
The ride to the Cave was quiet, Danny frowning at the lack of stars.
“Leave it.”
“But i can probably pull it out of the atmosphere.”
“And put it where?”
“… my chest?”
“Nope, no self experimentation without scientist supervision.”
“Don’t you count?”
“I am a detective, combatant, chemist and hacker. I am not a scientist.”
“Sounds fake.”
“You’re fake.”
“I’m ghostly, and a member of the cloned kids club.”
“You ate my twin in the womb.”
“So i get to be evil!”
“No. I’m evil; I’m a ceo and help a lot of coverups as a vigilante for other vigilantes and a handful of anti-heroes.”
“Evil me took out your not-son and his friends!” Danny argued.
“Please, three separate evil me’s managed that, and came back to gloat.”
“Well, those three ceased to exist or evil last i checked. My evil me’s in therapy and still murdery.”
“I know—how’s Dan doing and are we going with older brother cover or cousin like Dani?”
“His call, and he’s… unpacking still.”
“Eh-hem,” Alfred interrupted as Tim parked Red Bird. “I believe we need to have a family meeting are your other family members joining, excusing this Dan?”
“No, they don’t know this is happening,” Tim answered.
“That,” Danny looked around at the… trophy wing(?) of the cave. “Aannnd Jazz would enjoy psychoanalyzing you all too much. So, is this a ‘check all the info for verification cautionary tale’ or something else?” He asked as he turned his attention back to the bat-butler. Batler(?)
“Something else, Master Daniel.”
“Just Danny. I chose it, I get to keep it in all contexts.”
Alfred moved to open his mouth.
“Only one to not call him that made him an unwilling teen parent,” Tim interjected before Alfred could start up on formalities.
Alfred narrowed his eyes. “Has this individual been taken care of?”
Tim and Danny shared a look. “Working on it,” Tim answered, rubbing the inside of Danny wrist before he could start tugging his arteries or nerves as a stress stim.
Alfred looked between them. “Anything else i should be aware of Master Danny?”
“Just keep toast away from me, and I’m not a solid foods person—can do solid food in shake form just uh, jaw tends to freeze and lock at random since my powers came in.”
Alfred hummed in response to that. “Soft solids are acceptable, yes?”
Danny slowly nodded his head, and moved his hand to the thermos on his hip.
Tim squarely kept Danny on the side he could better block the cameras from as they followed Alfred up.
“I made a batch of chocolate salted caramel chip oatmeal cookies. I will bring you a more drinkable version of the batter with a strawberry smoothie on the side. Master Tim, your usual will be beside your serving.”
Tim grunted in response, checking his phone and keeping a steady hand on his twin’s pulse. Which was far too fast for Danny’s normal… trying to appease Tim’s co-workers by masking the liminality, or stress response to casually outing himself or to Tim dropping the Vlad forced cloning thing (Tim’s helped him with so, so many nightmares of watching his clones die. The fact one was identical to Rim didn’t help. Tim being present and alive did).
Danny smiled at him. Mask smile—so hiding Phantom’s impact or ignoring the trauma trigger he pulled. Yep, Tim is winning the evil twin contest for the wrong reasons again.
Alfred turned to see Tim analyzing his twin, who was more flushed in his face than before… he’d have to inform the Wayne clan to gentle their interrogation regarding Master Danny’s existence. Master Tim’s explanation helped explain the name situation, however it could have been done without triggering the poor boy. Had Master Tim given him a moment, he would have found the explanation unnecessary.
The twins stalled at the threshold of the meeting room.
Tim waved at Stephanie, Cass and Barbra sitting in the same general area together as he moved further in front of Danny and switched which hand was grounding him and monitoring his pulse. Stephanie was gleeful to say the least, Cass unfazed and Barbra giving him a too knowing wave back.
Dick was sitting between Damian and Bruce, the three dissecting every move Tim and Danny made. Tim made sure to shield him as much as he could from the imminent psychological warfare Bruce was planning. Damian would likely aim for any potential insecurity once he got too aggravated with everything, and was likely to say something that could set off Danny. He only really went through his firewalls instead of waiting for Tim to let him in when he was having a particularly nasty day and needed some twin time.
Tim couldn’t fathom what Dick’s plan was. The one he saw as his found older brother would laugh at him managing to fool everyone one on a loophole and tell him how to further the ruse. But the one who took up the cowl was different from the brother that mentored him and helped with everything from girls, leading a team and homework.
Duke and Jason were to the side. Jason looked morbidly amused while Duke seemed curious, so no worries on that end for Danny. Operation: ‘air out Batcorp’s laundry if they start shit’ was a go.
—
Okay next round i will want an idea of how you want batfam members to respond to the fact Tim ‘hid’ his family from them—as that’s how these chuckleheads are entering this meeting.
Tim’s got receipts and Danny is there mostly to divide Tim’s attention and watch the show.
Tim Drake’s Coworkers (ft. The Fenton Family)
It’s not that Tim doesn’t like the Batfamily. He tolerates them just fine. Damian is great for sparring (if you like sparring with a tiny murder machine), and Jason’s brand of dark humor isn’t too bad once you get used to it. Dick’s a bit too much sometimes, but overall? Fine. Totally fine.
But the thing is… they’re just his coworkers.
And it never really clicks for the Bats until Danny Phantom joins the Justice League and everything starts unraveling.
———
The revelation comes during a League meeting. They’re strategizing about some ghost-related chaos, and Danny floats into the Watchtower, bright and glowing.
“Oh, hey, Tim,” Danny greets casually, giving him a little wave.
Tim doesn’t even look up from his tablet. “Sup.”
Superman looks between them, confused. “…you two know each other?”
Danny grins. “yeah, he’s my brother.”
Dead silence.
“WHAT?!” Bruce’s bellow shakes the entire room.
Tim finally looks up, unfazed. “What? Did you think I just spawned into existence?”
“You have a brother?!” Clark sputters.
“Two siblings, actually,” Tim corrects, utterly nonchalant. “Danny’s the younger one. Jazz is the older one. She’s great. Super organized. Kept me alive in middle school.”
Bruce’s eye twitches. “Why—why am I only learning this now?”
Tim shrugs. “It didn’t seem relevant.”
“Relevant?” Diana repeats, incredulous. “You’re the brother of Danny Phantom and it’s not relevant?”
Danny, who’s been munching on some ectoplasm candy, jumps in: “Honestly, Tim’s always been kind of private about his personal life. We just figured it was his way of coping with the whole ‘raised-by-rich-neglectful-aunt’ thing.”
“Yeah, about that,” Tim interjects, glaring at Danny. “Thanks so much for dumping me with Aunt Janet, by the way.”
Danny shrugs sheepishly. “Mom and Dad panicked! They thought you’d get ghost-napped next!”
“Uh, correction: Aunt Janet left me to raise myself, so that plan was awesome.”
Bruce, trying to keep up, interrupts: “Hold on. Your parents left you with Janet Drake?”
“They didn’t know she sucked at raising kids,” Tim deadpans. “And to be fair, they did call. A lot. I just didn’t pick up.”
Jason, who has been cackling this entire time, leans forward. “Wait, wait, wait—so you’re telling me that the Replacement’s entire family is a bunch of ghost hunters?”
“Yup.” Danny pops the “p” with a grin.
“You’re kidding me,” Steph says, borderline hysterical.
Tim sighs, clearly over it. “Look, it’s not a big deal. Jazz keeps the parents in check, Danny handles the ghost stuff, and I… stay out of the way. It’s fine.”
“FINE?” Damian glares. “Drake, you’ve been fraternizing with ghost hunters while working with a vigilante group, and you think that’s fine?”
Tim raises an eyebrow. “Dami, chill. It’s not like it affects work. You’re my coworkers. They’re my family. Separate categories.”
Cue collective Batfamily malfunction.
———
Later, Danny is chilling in the Batcave, feet kicked up on the Batcomputer, chatting with Alfred. The rest of the Bats are still spiraling.
“Tim, we’ve lived together for years!” Dick exclaims, sounding genuinely hurt. “How are we only your coworkers?”
“You’re not my family,” Tim explains, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Danny and Jazz are my family. You guys are my teammates. It’s different.”
Jason throws his head back, laughing. “Oh my god, Replacement, you’re stone cold.”
“I’m not cold,” Tim argues. “I just don’t think we need to make it more complicated than it is. We work together. That’s enough.”
Meanwhile, Danny is wiping tears of laughter off his face. “Oh man. Jazz is gonna love this.”
#batfam#tim drake#danny phantom#danny fenton#dc x dp#fenton family supremacy#tim drake has priorities#imagine being called a coworker by your brother#jazz and danny are his real family#tim and danny are twins#let them be siblings and happy#long post#dcxdp
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ok. question.
ortega ended up hallucinating sidestep after they "died", but sidestep doesnt know about that. they know it got bad, but never the full extent of how their death affected them. so if your sidestep Did learn, if they found out ortega looked for them in every little piece they could, would that change anything for your sidesteps? would their relationship with ortega be any different?
#pulp speaks#Am i thinking of my “ortega sees sidestep posthb” fic again? perhaps#shameless plug btw yall should read it its called 'seen' on ao3 and i still like it#but anyway the important bits: ive been thinking about it with my sidesteps and its really interesting to me how different they are#but theyre all some variation of “i didnt know you /cared/”#caine is. uncomfortable with the idea#i genuinely dont know why but i do know that in the end their feelings on the matter are “whats done is done and im back now” with a small#“ill try not to leave again” mixed in#meanwhile cyrus is a deer in headlights over it#itd be way worse if he learned it when they met again- i feel like if he learned ortega was still that attached he wouldve left and never-#-come back. he would still want to Now but hes too tangled in his relationships and ortega is his /friend/ and leaving would just explode i#-his face‚ god Damnit ortega you son of a bitch‚ he shouldve just run. you werent supposed to drag him into caring about people again.#cecilia would have mixed feelings about it. i think shed resonate with it a lot for reasons she doesnt want to face#but it would also hit her like a goddamn Truck that he chose to move on/replace her rather than try get her back and its easier to get mad-#-about that than question her own feelings. but also maybe she could use this to her advantage? maybe this time he knows theres always a-#-chance hell come back for her next time. maybe. shes hoping there wont be a next time.#cynthias an interesting case because shes in love with ortega. deeply. but ortega /never came for her/ when she /promised/ and cynthia-#-is still furious about it#ortega hallucinated her in death but she couldnt put the pieces together and go looking herself? she cared enough to look for her but-#-not enough to save her?#she would still end up settling on bitterness for abandoning her but the information would shake her to her core#anyway. i think ortega should be used as a squeaky toy 👍#caine lynzal#cyrus becker#cecilia rider#cynthia garcia#ortega#sidestep#fhr
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You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)
#moe talks a lot#i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry#and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds#LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO#shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds#BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER#i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up#i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong#after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before#YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain#oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older#and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds#holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang#sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat#but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like#welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant#anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain#im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake#but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry#anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering
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pls i need to provide updates
#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year#and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire#and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f#friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl#acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what#are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and#friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after#everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to#invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me#i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother#and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids#so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo#any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd#and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk#THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date#w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a#few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay#scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK#like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl#like is that even doable#but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much#.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us#god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x#but it would be soooo funny#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed#popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x#i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like#its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe
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kill yourself 👍
#rant incoming sorry#guy who lives in a very urban area with easy connected fast mail service: We dont need it !#the way ppl talk abt canada post pisses me off so much#ppl dont support any workers gripes bc they have this arbitrary hatred for their service beinf bad or slow#and just say Well fuck canada post they lose a bajillian dollars a year and also the postal workers r evil for striking near the holidays>:(#saying theyd just rather use amazon or whatever the fuck#why would u rather use the shipping company owned by one of the filthiest billionaires on the planet thats known for bad worker conditions#over the shipping thats a canadian government service that will deliver to ur area even if its not profitable#when none of the fuckass private companies wanna bother going somewhere rural. canada post will go there#‘we dont really need it’ you sound so fucking stypid and sheltered and ignorant#also ‘well i do everything over the phone we should just have everything on the phone. including the most important id documents’#are you STUPID#‘we shouldnt even use cash anymore’ soundin ass i cant fucking stand u bitches#also i genuinely dont understand why so many canadians hate canada post ive never been anything but happy w their service#im not rural so ofc its fast but like. it is so fast. nothing comes damaged. every single worker ive met is so nice.#why do u guys hate canada post so much. im ride or die for canada post atp bc she doesnt deserve the hatred#id always rather smth get delivered by canada post over anyone else. sometimes fedex boxes are beat the fuck up when they get to me#and they and amazon sometimes deliver super late at night#and sometimes say its delivered before its Actually delivered ig to fit a time guarantee on the record#and i see amazon packages sit in a warehouse for several days before shipping just bc i didnt pay for prime#which is fine bc i dont need it that fast but like. canada post would just ship it to me as soon as its ready. fuck amazon#sorry anyways. pissed off#x
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[note: i know for a fact i'm doing this for the same reason that i fixate on nebulous fandom anxieties at other times: helplessness regarding anxieties about larger geopolitical issues]
feeling in a very weird position right now thinking about the fact theres a nonzero chance that either one of the cosplayers ive become acquainted with or someone in their immediate circle could do brownface in the future and people are gonna come at me like 'hey why are you not calling them out and/or giving them a racial sensitivity seminar and/or personally fistfighting them on the floor of the doujin circle event'
#i strongly feel westerners darkening their skin for cosplay are generally doing it in an 'i know this is offensive and dont care' edgy way#but people over here largely Dont Fucking Know because the cultural context behind why it's bad is not there#and i don't...personally feel like it's my job either to educate near-strangers on this or to make a big deal out of how i condemn it#(someone i just met and already became fond of said she wants to dress as a brown character and im already getting nervous#in case she does end up painting her skin and the pics are shared around or come to the attention of the western ppl i know in fandom#imagining people that i know pointing at me and going Hey Ebil You Are Brown. So You Hate Her Now Right? Slash Why Didnt You Stop Her)#cool. great. i wish instead of brown i were Invisible Color#id actually love if eventually people over here did learn more about that through me?#not even in an I Have To Correct Them way. just a cultural exchange way. the way im glad to learn what offends japanese ppl#they might find it interesting and worth knowing! but my ass trying to lecture people right now would absolutely just be...bad. bad.#'oh i just met this american and they seemed cool but then they started going on about how i was offending american values so. gaijins eh'#it's obvious to me nothing constructive would be achieved. i just hope people understand that.#i dunno. i dunno. i dunnoooooo.
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anyways. my very first attempt at malenia
#elden ring#my post#this starts late (?) bc i didnt want to get the cutscene in the clip but fumbled to start the recording bc she does kinda rush you#and i was not at all prepared#anyways im genuinely tempted to just write a long post dumping my thoughts on malenia and her fight and how im puzzling through it#ive reached peak intrinsic motivation elden ring#the only reason why i probably should wait to make the post is bc ive only gotten as far as first phase half health#i have another recording thats abt a minute and a half long attempt and i gave it a few tries today#its worth mentioning that the night before i decided to finally start fighting malenia i told my friend (who managed to beat her) that bc#a lot of the last few endgame bosses didnt take me too long to beat i was worried that malenia wouldnt take me very long#and he just told me she would throw me into a meat grinder. and i lasted 12 seconds against her after that intro cutscene#anyways the fact that she's a very straightforward and easy to see boss makes it very easy to break her down and figure out how she#works n why she's hard and figure out a plan and everything i really like it. no particle effects just some sparks and sword trail lines#i keep getting caught by her flurry attack n today my plan (while talking to my friend) was to figure out why i kept getting caught by#it despite it being very obviously telegraphed n then putting together why i struggle with it. its REALLY fun to think technically abt her#anyways. fun part abt me getting killed by the grab + impale is that i honestly wasnt sure if that was actually implemented in the game#bc id never seen it in gameplay and. here we go. ten seconds in there it is
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guess whos not going in at all this week, actually
#MY MANAGER EMAILED LIKE 2 HOURS B4 I HAD TO GO IN#she finally changed my schedule (1 day) to the night shift today#(i emailed her to be safe just kinda casually reaffirming im going in at the new time & then asking if any other shifts wanted 2 be changed#bcs that sounds great to me whstever option she goes with#she ignored that question & i get a new email from her asking if i completed a training. lets called it DOC#basically a long time ago she said 'i will send you DOC instructions soon' .. a few days pass and i get three 50 paged packets#one is called NAVIGATING DOC#im like oh ok cool that must be the DOC training shes talking abt bcs the other 2 packets were abt various trainings#NAH BRUH. APPARENTLY THE DAY IM SUPPOSED TO GO IN. SHE MESSAGES ME SOME ENTIRELY ALIEN PROGRAM#and is like 'u completed this right? cus if u didnt u cant come in today.'#LIKE?? MAYBE I WOULDA IF U SENT THE SHIT#but it's also like. dam i shouldve emailed prompting her to send what she said she would n clarifying BUT FUCK#WHY DO I GOTTA?? IM NOT THE MANAGER#she literally told me the name of the program rn thru email so i type it in and see like four hour long modules to complete#mind u i aint never even been informed a WHISPER abt this new program. nothings even labeled DOC TRAINING#but my struggle is. was i notified this?? and i just didnt see??? was i supposed to clarify with her what the DOC training was exactly??#the only thing ive heard abt doc training b4 this is 'i need to send u DOC training soon' in EMAIL. so i expected an alert#abt THE DOC TRAINING... in an EMAIL notification. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS#idk man#i dont even care bro like im busy as hell & the work is just to build clinic hours so i dont care abt the money factor#it's just like. can we get this first day jitters thing over with already?? im so over this bro#yaddayadda i emailed her an apology n ill be on that ASAP shit. but i did let her know i am basically justnnow seeing this site#n if there was any email or notif that couldve/tried to inform me of its existence 2 pls let me know / figure out how to find it#so the issue doesnt occur again & i dont have to keep botherinher which im so srry of bcs med is stress n shes just trying to get by#but still bro im a lil miffed bcs she probably thinks im stupid now and now im wondering if i AM#bcs WDYM ONLINE MODULES. AINT NOBODY SAID SH IT EVEN ABT THE EXISTENCE OF THEM!!! i wouldve pressed harder 4 clarification#if i knew it was an ONLINE MODULE i had to look out for on some randomass site i didnt even know the name of until now#instead of the EMAIL UVE BEEN 'COMMUNICATING' WITH ME ON#ARREGHHHHHHHH IM NOT STUPID. I SWEAR IM NOT STUPID FUCCK MY BAKA LIFE
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told my gynecologist how bad my job is and she told me to apply at that hospital and put her down as a reference. we do stan
#she said they might train me to be an or tech which sounds captivating but i'm too stupid i fear i would rather do something not with people#unrelated but why does nobody warn you about the speculum i'm sorry but it feels like theyre ripping your vagina in half#i did almost have a panic attack because i didnt realize there was going to be a physical exam i thought she was just going to talk to me 😭#and the speculum pain viscerally brought back the iud experience. i'm fine though i'm going to go get breakfast#and then i'm going to go to the beach and then i'm going to go home and APPLY FOR GOOD JOBS 😤 AGAIN#she said if you work there you get free medical care 👁️👁️#i did forget to tell her that i still wanted a hysterectomy because i was so caught off guard by having to take my pants off lmao#but i'm losing my medicaid so its not like that was going to happen soon anyway. i'll give the iud a chance to redeem itself#me
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Right here's what I hope happens since we're not getting a qsmp stream like Foolish and Tina said we would get this weekend.
- they reset the art in the museum on Monday doing a nepotism and putting Tina's art of Pomme in
- wait a few days for people to see it and those that don't know about it realise that it THE TinaKitten that drew it
- have a lore stream that's potentially just Tina (and Foolish) escaping because Bagera and Cellbit chose to stay while Tina and Foolish were running to the boat and wanted to escape
- Foolish and Leo reunion, Teaduo reunion
- Tina finally gets to meet Empanada and immediately hit it off then they go to the museum as a mini family
- Tina points out the Pomme drawing and how she got in because nepotism and Empanada asks her to draw her
- Tina immediately does it off stream and privately messages the admins to put it in the museum and then she'll post it on the next monday after they've seen it so it's not spoiled
- chat and Em both freak out at seeing Tina's adorable drawing and then all the other eggs keep asking Tina to draw them
#i literally had this dream last night#and either em is cheeky being like why didnt you draw me? since the museum isnt canon#or is super nervous asking to be drawn as well because shes a little sweetheart#please i need them to meet and tina immediately fall in love#also bagi needs to ask her to be her girlfriend the second they get a moment alone#i cant have tina keeping going around like 'shes my minecraft... crush???? she might not have meant anything that way!!'#after having gone on a date and bagi literally constantly flirting with her#while bagis just constantly refering to her as her girlfriend before adding that she hasnt actually asked yet#these gay disasters#teaduo#qsmp#qsmp tina#qsmp empanada#qsmp bagi#qsmp teaduo#it would be funny that if tina does decide to draw all the eggs that the space above the lecturn on the second floor is the place for them#then the rest is still the fans art but the eggs can see Tina's art of them without having to find them in the server#i just fucking love tinas art and her pomme and have done leo are so good#i want to jnow how she would design empanada
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sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)
but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!
so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"
....
my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!
SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!
#mind you this was over 10 years ago now. it *could* have gotten better but id be extremely shocked if it has#autistic#autism#actually autistic#adhd#neurodivergent#audhd#school#school problems#yes i know theres rules or maybe even laws for this and its why they are like this but its bad and should change#if they offered smaller classes with less sensory overloading bullshit and other things i needed it would be great!#but they refuse to accommodate your actual needs and make up useless accommodations to legally say they help disabilities#ND people (not just audhd) and other disabled people that graduate with no useful accommodations are so strong and cool. proud of you!#ones who had to drop you youre also cool for not dealing with their bullshit snd allowing yourself to not suffer for a sheet of paper!#(though i know it can feel bad when everyone around you makes you feel bad for needed to drop out or failing out and not going back)#i completely stopped going to my psychology class because i started a week late due to scheduling issues and#suddenly we are told theres a paper due in 3 days and need to hse the textbook i didnt have yet as the source for it all#and it was in the syllabus i didnt get because i was a week late and didnt know we got one. the professor didnt notice me out of#the 100 other students in that large lecture hall. that room was also a sensory nightmare hellscape#too many students made things noisy and distracting. multiple fluorescent lights were flickering constantly and never fixed#the professor used a mic to speak to us and it had a constant horrible loud buzzing. it did that loud mic screech noise randomly#without warning. all the time. the quality of the sound was horrible so it was hard to understand her. on top of that she had a very thick#accent i wasnt familiar with so that on top of the horrible buzzing mkc quality that also cut her out constantly was auditory processing#disorder HELL. I dont know how ANYONE survived thst class but i seemed to be the only one struggling. everyone else turned in their papers#and i gave up and stopped going. was too late to drop the class to get my money back so i wasted probably a few thousand dollars#and THATS what i mean by give me reasonable and useful accommodation. test time would NOT make that class better at all#fix the mic and light issues at least or give me a smaller class with more attentive professor or something!#offer smaller classes for struggling disabled people! if the issue is not knowing who needs them then offer a switch to those struggling!#i got called onto a dean/counselor meeting because a professor noticed my horrible grades and stuff so its possible to catch us and help!#THESE SCHOOLS JUST NEED TO START BEING WILLING TO. dont make us do all the work to accommodate ourselves and expect to do well in school!
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"Yona was just added bc Nintendo wants people to stop shipping sidlink!" Literally what the hell are you talking about
#yes nintendo is homophobic. no they do not give a singular shit about what their fanbase does??? what are you talking abouuuutttt#they literally dont care what people do as long as they get money??? like what#listen im upset abt yona having so many unanswered questions. mainly she came from another zora's domain#meaning she came from outside of hyrule. so that leads to a lot of questions.#but howww do you come to the conclusion that she was just added as a 'no homo' indicator#dont even get me started on the people genuinely unironically calling this queerbaiting. what are you onnnnnnn#'and oh but sidon said he used to see her as a sister! so its gross and wrong!' sidon literally thought out loud to links face abt how#had things been different and link had gotten married to mipha he would be his BROTHER IN LAW. SAID THAT OUT LOUD TO HIS FACE. so shh#imo. yona was added for one 'ohh wow exciting new character look at this' and two. as a way for sidon's trauma to be acknowledged#bc it was veeery briefely shown in botw. for like. a singular second if you snuck up on him at mipha's statue#but yona's defining scene in totk was her forcing sidon to confront that he wasn't being himself because of that trauma. and that#he needed to let go of the fear around it. if only temporary. because his people needed him.#so tbh?? sheis very important to the plot. she new mipha. admired her. knows why sidon still struggles with this and#how difficult and frightening everything becomes when he views the world through the lens of 'what if i lose someone again'#like. they added yona for his struggles to be spelled out to the audience even further#so to just boil her down to 'ewww woman gets in the way of my gaybies 😡😡😡'. hello. did you play the game.#do you even know who these characters are. quick gimme ten facts about sidons character that you didnt make up for shipping purposes.pronto
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