#and she still dreams
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I know this has been talked about a lot but just been thinking about how Something Blue is like a fanfic writer going “haha what if I shipped this wouldn’t it be wild jk” and then it spiralling wildly out of control. It is a crack ship eventually treated seriously and I find that hilarious.
And also just, how does the Will Be Done spell even work. The parameters. I’ve been thinking about it, and Willow only said “why doesn’t she just go marry him” (or something to that effect) not “why don’t they fall hopelessly in love with each other and get married.” They could’ve easily had it where they both maintained their enemy dynamic and been very confused and angry the entire way to getting a marriage certificate, and I think it’s that the concept of marriage and the action of it have to align with the person’s internal logic in some way. Buffy does not believe she will get married, she is the Slayer, she can fantasize but she will most likely die young. So marriage in her head is a Big Fantasy Thing that should only be done if you are Truly In Love and it must require all the wedding planning and the beautiful white dress and all the bells and whistles because the improbability of it happening just fuels the abstract fantasy. She comes across as So Happy and it’s the happiest she’s ever been because on some level she cannot imagine herself being that happy and she cannot imagine a wedding without being that happy, so it’s designated into this little Buffy Fantasy Box Scenario.
And Spike has loved Dru for a hundred years and never needed a wedding or marriage because that is a Human Concept that he probably also fantasized about as a human but hasn’t really thought of since (and has probably had to abandon). Their love doesn’t need a silly paper, they are having a wedding everyday, they celebrate their love everyday, it’s about the constant displays of devotion. So in this made up marriage scenario, Spike can only imagine himself as initiating a proposal if he is In Love and Devoted (and probably secretly wishes he and Dru did have some kind of wedding but would never admit that. Thinking about Angelus telling him: “you can take what you want, have what you want, but nothing is yours. Not even her [dru].”)
Basically, Spike and Buffy as they are would only consider marriage if they are truly in love with someone and they both have a little tentatively abstract Wedding Fantasy that lives rent free in their brains that they would never admit exists there in the first place. And it’s why both of them act like a CoupleTM and do all the Wedding Planning ThingsTM because that’s what a wedding should be, right?
They shouldn’t be a Thing [couple/in love] and yet they are meeting each other halfway in indulging this Thing [wedding/marriage/”normal” life] that can never be.
#I know Spike's repressed feelings and denial have been talked about#but i'm just thinking about the pure crackhead energy this ship started on#it's about the impossible#the improbable#meeting each other halfway in the shared fantasy we would never tell anyone about#it's not so much the wedding itself#but more the celebration of something that you are promising to someone else will last forever#spike had a love he said was eternal#and yet he also tells buffy he's never been 'close'#buffy was given an expiration date that keeps updating in increments#and she still dreams#she beats up a troll with his own hammer while yelling xander and anya's love will last forever#basically they are both just teenage girls cutting up magazines together#and that's valid#spuffy#something blue#buffy summers#spike btvs#btvs#btw I don't think anyone needs a wedding to say they love each other I'm purely basing this off of what it might mean for the characters#btvs s4
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Uh-
just found out my cousin (who lives in England) is in the art department of a bunch of shows??? And she worked oN DOCTOR WHO? AND HAD LUNCH WITH DAVID TENNANT???? and she just told me so casually because she's interested in the art, not the show? I mean, excuse me? She worked on SHERLOCK???? FOR A WHOLE SEASON?? She worked on Peaky Blinders and Lord of the Rings and Game of Thrones??? And probably other things because she has a shitty memory and according to her everything is a blur?? AND AT ONE POINT SHE WAS LIKE: "oh and have you ever heard of Neil Gaiman?" And I was trying not to scream, because yes, of course I've heard of Neil, he's only my favorite author, I've only read like all of his books multiple times, and if you say you worked on Good Omens or the Sandman I'm going to lose it completely. So I said "yeah I've read a couple of his books," -you know, like a liar- "what about him?" and she goes "well I worked on one of his shows and he's brilliant i just can't remember which one" and i go "w-what do you mean he's brilliant? You're.. you're talking about his writing... his writing is brilliant, right?" And she cheerfully says "oh no I don't read books, I ment he was really nice and brilliant when I talked to him" and i go "WHAT DID YOU TALK ABOUT WHAT DID YOU TALK ABOUT" and she thinks for a moment and goes "oh! BRICKS" WHAT IN THE WORLD YES NO THAT MAKES SENSE YOU GET TO WORK AND TALK WITH NEIL FUCKING GAIMAN AND YOU TALK ABOUT BRICKS? NO THAT'S TOTALLY NORMAL I'M NOT MAD ".... it was what I was designing at the time, I needed to know what vibe the bricks should have. Anyway want to see the spinning fireplace I made for doctor who" WHAT THE FUCK.
@neil-gaiman do you remember any brick conversations by any chance
#Doctor who#Sherlock#David tennant#I'm losing it#neil gaiman#DAVID TENNANT JUST SAT DOWN NEXT TO HER AT LUCH AND SHE GOES OH YEAH HE WAS SUPER NICE. VERY TALL. ????#anyway i- oh my god.#Let me just perish in peace#Just my cousin living my dream making art and vibing with Neil and David and her fucking bricks what the fuck#Good omens#Sorry this is a mess#I understand actors are still people I'm not saying they aren't but can you look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn't be psyched#If you could have lunch with David tennant?
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legend has it that the young witch circe and the once beautiful nymph scylla shared a complicated past...
#art#cirscylla#that's the ship name i like for them best anyway#circe#scylla#greek mythology#welcome to my greek mythos yuri#DOOMED YURI#circylla#epic the musical#do i even tag it as that? i think i should cuz epic is the reason im so into greek mythos#jorge said we might get a spinoff about their backstory and im insane over that#i know it's probably going to be about how circe loved that one guy but still a girl can dream#this is them but younger! before circe turns scylla into the horrific man-eating monster that even poseiden fears#there's just so much potential here#consider a younger and much warier circe landing on the island for the first time after being outcasted by her family for her magic#and she meets scylla there who back then is a much happier and playful person#enemies to lovers to enemies again#i don't know if they ever make it to lovers or if they were only an almost#they're about to have the worst breakup in greek history#im rambling in tags MY BAD
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[ID: A panel from Dungeon Meshi. It shows the corpses of Senshi, Chilchuck, Izutsumi and Laois all propped up against fancy paintings sitting on the ground against the wall. Marcille is alive but has a reddened, tear-streaked face and a dead-eyed expression as she leans her head against Laios' shoulder, reached out a hand, and says, "Did you give even a moment's thought to how I'd feel surrounded by your corpses...?" End ID.]
God this panel took me right the fuck out. On the one hand, what else can they do? Marcille's the only member of the party skilled enough in magic to do resurrection spells. Laois straight up tells her he's giving her the neck armour because she's the healer, the one they can't afford to lose; she can rez the rest but if she dies, they're all doomed. And it's a uniquely cruel position for Marcille to be in because of her deep, aching fear of outliving everyone she loves, a fear that Laios has to be aware of on some level, even if he doesn't clearly remember the nightmare he rescued Marcille from... but even if he was fully aware of it, that doesn't change the fact that she's the only one of them who can rez. It's inescapable that she has to be in this position, just as, in the end, it's inescapable that she will outlive everyone in this panel even if they live to ripe old ages. Marcille being forced to microdose her inevitable looming grief is a great setup for her making the decision she does when they meet the Winged Lion--how can she go through this again, for real?
#Dungeon Meshi#Delicious in Dungeon#Dunmeshi#I kinda love that at the end she still hasn't actually given up on her dream of extending all races' lifespans#she just knows the price of doing it the Winged Lion's way isn't worth it#and she gets time to digest this moment and this feeling#and become less blindly terrified of losing her friends#she still wants them to live. She's still determined to make it happen#she's just also more prepared to accept failure in that quest#I love her#dungeon meshi spoilers
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How does nooroo feel about Tom in your villian dad au?
After initial introductions, Tom basically thinks Nooroo is a figment of his imagination and a testament to his mind crumbling from the grief of losing Sabine. Nooroo gets an inside look on what really matters to tom, though
Tom uses the butterfly miraculous not for himself, but for the benefit of his daughter. The vengeance he's trying to take on "Hawkmoth" isn't quite as simple as "you're responsible for the death of my wife," it stems from a very, very different source - which makes Nooroo more sympathetic to helping him.
He's still not thrilled, but, Marinette and Tom are so kind to him, he really can't find it in himself to complain.
#replies#dad villain au#my art#nooroo#tom dupain cheng#marinette dupain cheng#marinette is all busted up because she's still very clumsy#and keeps hurting herself while cooking#she's also massively sleep deprived#because when she sleeps she dreams of her mom and it makes waking up a cruel joke she cant handle most nights#so as a result she's overworked. sleep deprived. stressed. physically banged up. and also dropped out of school due to bullying#long post
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Trying to remember the last time I played hide and seek. The last time I said hi to everyone on the street or saw the girls I spent every day of six years with. The last time my dad picked me up, or my mum brushed my hair. When was the last time I dressed without consideration? There is so much to think about now. I remember falling on the grass at school and making stories with the clouds. Hanging upside down from the swing and realising how big the world was. I wonder on the path of growing when we stop feeling big. I am taller now, smaller still.
#growing up#girlhood#grief#I saw a childhood friend yesterday#she was working#and after twelve years of knowing her it had been a year#her hair is longer#her smile brighter#and the intense sincerity of the happiness we shared for one another was heavy and freeing all at once#I don’t know when we stopped playing#and I know life has gotten in the way#but at some point all our dreams became options#with the life I choose daily I am happy#and still#I wish we could go back once to when nothing mattered but how fast you could run#childhood friends#they know you even when you don’t know yourself#mine
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Alas, this beautiful dream could not last.
#dungeon meshi#falin touden#dungeon meshi spoilers#better drawn mdzs#(<- my higher effort art tag. I need to get a new one.) While it's different from my usual style I really loved how this came out!#Strolling back to the art scene to remind everyone I am still a lover of botanicals.#I had a blast with the symbolism for this one:#White lilium longiflorum (easter lily) for rebirth. Purple hyacinthus orientalis for sorrow and forgiveness.#Red spider lily (Lycoris radiata) for loss and death.#'Rebirth into something new' is so well done in Dungeon Meshi. She is back but she is not the same.#The last few episodes/chapters gives her this dreamy quality to her. As if she's not quite real. She's so perfect in their memories.#And as we know of dreams - no matter how sweet- they must end once we wake up.#It is so painful to lose someone twice. To see someone you loved in a dream and wake up and remember that loss again.#Dungeon Meshi being a grief allegory is important to me. I'll explain more as the story continues B'*)
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Had a weird dream
#if i had a nickle for every isat dream ive had id have 2 nickles#which isnt a lot but its still weird it happened twice#mira almost dies here somehow btw#idk why tho ig the golf cart aura got her#shes fine tho#phone doodle#in stars and time#isat#this dream escalates weird#sorry i have nothing else to post
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TRY TO FORGET HER (hey!)
#homestuck#terezi pyrope#game over tl vrisrzi is actually cataclysmic. by the way.#when she meets aranea in the dream bubble and shes like. “i know she was horrible but i miss her and i dont even know what id tell her”#it killed me#this shit is not fucking funny#its all such a complicated mess and you still love her
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Do drones dream of fake contentedness?
#P.S. J is only deleting that dream#she isn’t deleting G’s memories of Cyn#because in twitter a lot of people thought J was making G forget his mother#sorry still trying to improve my storytelling via comic#Murder Drones: Parental Control AU#md cyn#murder drones#murder drones art#murder drones au#murder drones fanart#murder drones solver#sdg#serial designation g#murder drones cyn#serial designation j#sdj#md parental control
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#the owl house#toh#huntlow#watching and dreaming#wad spoilers#watching and dreaming spoilers#toh hunter#willow park#god the progression here is E N D I N G me#four years later and he still loses all brain function if she touches him....#the owl house spoilers
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noodle stopper figures are SO cute 💙
#vocaloid#hatsune miku#ramen#food#art#vocaloid fanart#anime#maruchan#14 years i am still drawing vocaloid. good#illustration#i just got my first noodle stopper a couple months ago. she was already a very affordable figure but then she was on SALE too#and it was a pretty good sale. i love you bigbadtoystore mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah m#she looks cute on a little instant ramen and when she's Not on ramen she is on my monitor. i love her#i'm surprised there aren't more noodle stopper figures that dont have their own little ramen cups though!!!#share the ramen with your blorbo or waifu ....#one of my dream jobs is to design a miku figure. that probably wont happen cuz i dont really have an anime art style but#its nice to think that maybe i Could some day. just theoretically ..... just to Pretend ....
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one of the things that i think we should pay attention to, socially, about the disney v. desantis thing is that it is really highlighting the importance of remembering nuance.
in a purely neutral sense, if you engage in something problematic, that does not mean you are necessarily agreeing with what makes it problematic. and i am worried that we have become... so afraid of any form of nuance.
disney isn't my friend, they're a corporate monopoly that bastardized copyright laws for their own benefit, ruin the environment, and abuse their workers (... and many other things). this isn't a hypothetical for me - i grew up in florida. i also worked for the actual Walt Disney World; like, in the parks. i am keenly aware of the ways they hurt people, because they hurt me. i fully believe that part of the reason florida is so conservative is because it's been an "open secret" for years now that disney lobbies the government to keep minimum wage down, and i know they worked hard to keep the parks unmasked and open during the worst parts of Covid. they purposefully keep their employees in poverty. they are in part responsible for the way the floridian government works.
desantis is still, by a margin that is frankly daunting, way worse. the alternative here isn't just "republicans win", it's actual fascism.
in a case like this, where the alternative is to allow actual fascism into united states legislation - where, if desantis wins, there are huge and legal ramifications - it's tempting to minimize the harm disney is also doing, because... well, it's not fascism. but disney isn't the good guy, either, which means republicans are having a field day asking activists oh, so you think their treatment of their employees is okay?
we have been trained there is a right answer. you're right! you're in the good group, and you're winning at having an opinion.
except i have the Internet Prophecy that in 2-3 months, even left-wing people will be ripping apart activists for having "taken disney's side". aren't i an anti-capitalist? aren't i pro-union? aren't i one of the good ones? removed from context and nuance (that in this particular situation i am forced to side with disney, until an other option reveals itself), my act of being like "i hope they have goofy rip his throat out onstage, shaking his lifeless body like a dog toy" - how quickly does that seem like i actually do support disney?
and what about you! at home, reading this. are you experiencing the Thought Crime of... actually liking some of the things disney has made? your memories of days at the parks, or of good movies, or of your favorite show growing up. maybe you are also evil, if you ever enjoyed anything, ever, at all.
to some degree, the binary idealization/vilification of individual motive and meaning already exists in the desantis case. i have seen people saying not to go to the disney pride events because they're cash grabs (they are). i've seen people saying you have to go because they're a way to protest. there isn't a lot of internet understanding of nuance. instead it's just "good show of support" or "evil bootlicking."
this binary understanding is how you can become radicalized. when we fear nuance and disorder, we're allowing ourselves the safety of assuming that the world must exist in binary - good or bad, problematic or "not" problematic. and unfortunately, bigots want you to see the world in this binary ideal. they want you to get mad at me because "disney is taking a risk for our community but you won't sing their praises" and they want me to get mad at you for not respecting the legit personal trauma that disney forced me through.
in a grander scheme outside of disney: what happens is a horrific splintering within activist groups. we bicker with each other about minimal-harm minimal-impact ideologies, like which depiction of bisexuality is the most-true. we gratuitously analyze the personal lives of activists for any sign they might be "problematic". we get spooked because someone was in a dog collar at pride. we wring our hands about setting an empty shopping mall on fire. we tell each other what words we may identify ourselves by. we get fuckin steven universe disk horse when in reality it is a waste of our collective time.
the bigots want you to spend all your time focusing on how pristine and pretty you and your interests are. they want us at each other's throats instead of hand in hand. they want to say see? nothing is ever fucking good enough for these people.
and they want their followers to think in binary as well - a binary that's much easier to follow. see, in our spaces, we attack each other over "proper" behavior. but in bigoted groups? they attack outwards. they have someone they hate, and it is us. they hate you, specifically, and you are why they have problems - not the other people in their group. and that's a part of how they fucking keep winning.
some of the things that are beloved to you have a backbone in something terrible. the music industry is a wasteland. the publishing industry is a bastion of white supremacy. video games run off of unpaid labor and abuse.
the point of activism was always to bring to light that abuse and try to stop it from happening, not to condemn those who engage in the content that comes from those industries. "there is no ethical consumption under late capitalism" also applies to media. your childhood (and maybe current!) love of the little mermaid isn't something you should now flinch from, worried you'll be a "disney adult". wanting the music industry to change for the better does not require that you reject all popular music until that change occurs. you can acknowledge the harm something might cause - and celebrate the love that it has brought into your life.
we must detach an acknowledgment of nuance from a sense of shame and disgust. we must. punishing individual people for their harmless passions is not doing good work. encouraging more thoughtful, empathetic consumption does not mean people should feel ashamed of their basic human capacities and desires. it should never have even been about the individual when the corporation is so obviously the actual evil. this sense that we must live in shame and dread of our personal nuances - it just makes people bitter and hopeless. do you have any idea how scared i am to post this? to just acknowledge the idea of nuance? that i might like something nuanced, and engage in it joyfully? and, at the same time, that i'm brutally aware of the harm that they're doing?
"so what do i do?" ... well, often there isn't a right answer. i mean in this case, i hope mickey chops off ron's head and then does a little giggle. but truth be told, often our opinions on nuanced subjects will differ. you might be able to engage in things that i can't because the nuance doesn't sit right with me. i might think taylor swift is a great performer and a lot of fun, and you might be like "raquel, the jet fuel emissions". we are both correct; neither of us have any actual sway in this. and i think it's important to remember that - the actual scope of individual responsibility. like, i also love going to the parks. Thunder Mountain is so fun. you (just a person) are not responsible for the harm that Disney (the billion dollar corporation) caused me. i don't know. i think it's possible to both enjoy your memories and interrogate the current state of their employment policies.
there is no right way to interrogate or engage with nuance - i just hope you embrace it readily.
#does this make sense#to do be deleted probably yikes#(takes a swing at a wasp's nest)#like i think ppl have started to just be really quiet when they like something 'problematic'#and im like... u can be like -#girl tswift NEEDS to just TAKE A BUS . LIKE?????????????????????#while also being like.#''she's a lot of fun''#if ur personal policy is that u don't support her for that reason that's great#but it's like. eating meat???#like yeah some people won't bc the environment. but the fact i eat meat doesn't mean i hate the earth#like i can say that i think the meat industry is HORRIFIC and also downright cruel to its employees#but like. still enjoy a chicken nugget....#there are people who choose otherwise. it's okay . we are people. i make like no money. u probably don't either#us fighting about whether or not it's Right To Eat The Chicken Tender just distracts from like.#actually turning your ire on the corporation#i hope it's clear what i'm saying here is like. when we fight each other for Purity Reasons#we are just doing the work of corporations . for free. like they WANT us to be doing this lol#it's the fucking DREAM of the upperclass that now ALL forms of responsibility fall on the individual
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so ive been thinking so hard about that transfem butch zoro au.
i feel like at the Very beginning (after kuinas death) she does try to present real feminine like but it doesnt feel like Her and eventually she stops doing it (and in any case its not like kuina was super feminine so why would she try to be like that??)
on the other hand she HAS to make sure everyone knows shes a woman when she beats their ass and becomes the worlds greatest swordsman. so sports bras (or equivalent whatever) and open shirts are a staple
i think she would do hrt (or equivalent Whatever) because again she wants to prove that kuina could have done it. unfortunately i do also think this means she trains about 1 million times as hard
trans sanji............. coming to the realisation that maybe she Wants to be taken care of by a hot butch........................ as a pretty femme
#the lil fashion drawing wasnt initially supposed to have a corset but i had a dream about it specifically irt sanji. so LMAO#one piece#zosan#roronoa zoro#black leg sanji#sanji#art#the mellorine bullshit.......... i feel like. what happens is that sanji (using he/him Pre egg cracking)#thought she was a man at first. developed the rivalry. and by the time he realised she was a woman it was awkward for everyone to backtrack#but i dont think he could stand the idea that hes not treating a woman right and i also think that would be shitty lmao#but he just cant treat her like that. but he still sees her as a woman. i think instead hes acting in a way to affirm her butchness....#does that make any sense. adghdbshbjgg
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N2 Floyd in the first movie
Sad little man got himself captured :(
He also gets punched in the face, but that's neither here nor there lmao
Also sorry for not posting for a fat minute I've been busy XD
Bonus: What John and Branch be doing
RIP in pieces John Dory, you were a brave troll and will be missed
I've got some more doodles of them going through it in the first movie, maybe we will see them soon teehee .
#my art#trolls au#dreamworks trolls#trolls#trolls 3#trolls john dory#trolls floyd#trolls branch#trolls oc#n2 au#not the only one au#ye floyd is singing that song from DBH#its a good song#and he also cant hue shift cuz depression and stress#that little sketch of bridget was the first time ive drawn her#shes so freaking cute#she reminds me of my aunt#also someone seems to recognize floyds little angry face#i wonder why#hehe#i say having out the reason why in the picture#john and Branch are also going through it#cuz in the dream this originates from jd legit tried to throw hands with a whole ass bergen#and loses obviously but he tried and thats all that matters#branch is just losing brothers by the second#hes obvi gonna assume Floyds already dead and then JD is family guy death posing in front of him#but he still goes out to help poppy#cuz john asked and hes also in love with poppy so he wouldve gone eventually either way#and he doesnt want floyd to get left behind 🥺#like a certain green someone hehe
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es rarepair week 2024 day 1 | AU/future
lil ghostic au of mine!!! yuzuru and the rest of fine are long since trapped souls in an abandoned mansion of which rst come across while looking for shelter during a storm :] it doesnt um. particularly end well
#doodles#duck scribbles#es rarepair week 2024#midoyuzu#yuzumido#i Was gonna do the stardew au but then it made me kind of sad. actually this is even worse in that aspect but im in a mood#enstars#midori finds his diary of which details the life of and events leading to yuzuru and the rest of the residents' deaths and w it slowly#becomes able to see/interact with (to an extent) yuzurus spectre himself#midori takamine#yuzuru fushimi#ghostswere initially rather aggressively hospitable in order to keep lost strangers there to eventually die and become a lost soul like the#but most w time grew to just want to be freed and be able to pass on in peace. more hostile ghosts become vague wisps of what they were bef#ore once theyve lost their tether to humanity but those with a strong will still have more control and effect on their surroundings somewha#yuzuru specifically was determined to maintain the mansion and has for decades and maybe centuries kept it orderly hence the clarity of his#spirit!!! having been one of those hostile spirits himself before has moved on to gently guiding guests away from the more dangerous areas#and assisting them so as to ensure their safe leave#they look for a way to break the curse on the mansion together so as to free all their souls!! unfortunately for midori she fell in love w#someone who has long since died 👍#the lil ballroom scene was a funny thing i dreamed about a while ago actually. i like to think watarus ghost put on some music unprompted#oh and since the rest of rst is also there technically you can expect chiaki is Not having a very good time
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