#and plus I just like the taste of them
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Mate, take it from one allergy bitch to another make your peace with not being able to eat tomatoes. It'll only get worse.
(serious in tags)
#op#for real though I completely get your warning here. trust me when I say I'm not just going about this without caution.#I've made peace with the fact I'm probably not getting to eat tomatoes a very very long time ago and though it hurt I accepted it#luckily I don't have a nightshade allergy I may have a big handful of allergies and sensitivities but I dodged it somehow.#and also this isn't anaphylactic either which I'm also very grateful for as someone who has to deal with that with shellfish.#I've been working with my doc for a while to figure out how to go about the Tomato Problem#my doc and my main reason for the pursuit of tomatoes is mostly medical fascination on both of our parts as people in the field as#we found my main sensitivity is most likely to a protein found in certain mainstream breeds of tomato when it was crossed over with nicotin#because I also have a nicotine sensitivity and they share a similar reaction#and when he got in a sample of tomato with certain similar compounds removed I had no reaction#and I did test negative for a nightshade reaction across the board.#so we've been on the hunt for a tomato breed that existed before that breed was crossed over with nicotine#or a way to process and cook normal tomatoes in a way that breaks down that compound#and plus I just like the taste of them#and think they have a good texture going on too#but from what me and my doc have discovered it's just given me a sense of hope about eating them for the first time in a long while#and I must take a W where I can when it comes to my allergies#thanks for the ask!
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There was something heartbreaking in the way she was gazing at him, as if she might die if he didn’t kiss her. Not from heartbreak, not from embarrassment—it was almost as if she needed him for nourishment, to feed her soul, to fill her heart.
#bridgerton#bridgertonedit#polinedit#tvedit#romancegifs#bridgertonblr#cinematv#polin#periodedit#perioddramaedit#perioddramasource#*mine#I COULD EAT THAT GIRL FOR LUNCH YEAH SHE DANCES ON MY TONGUE TASTES LIKE SHE COULD BE THE ONE#anyway i will forever be obsessed with this kiss like. this is the one for the books#it's literally so iconic of them to look for first kiss inspiration in jess/nick cause. they just placed in the top 5 in tv kisses (TO ME)#i couldve giffed so many more moments like. the giffer's eye is twitching rn#but there are huge so i stuck to these 4#i mean the first one?? the way she flinches as if he burned her as if she felt an electric current a spark at the touch#his fingertips just oh so gently tracing her jaw pulling her in#the uh oh moment in the second gif. the realisation that they cant just stop there#colin's brows furrowing in the third. and then relaxing. guy's going through it right there#(plus the thumb yeah)#and then the last one? hoo boy the savoring THE SAVORING
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songs that are trc characters to me
downhill by lincoln - ronan. "and if i meant every word that i ever said you'd probably think i was an evil, broken person, and you would be right." THATS HIM. THATS SO HIM. and the "i was born into the world on a silken cloud and i got bored of the world before i hit the ground" is ronan and dreaming. he was born into the world through niall and mor, got the gift (and curse) of being a dreamer, which results in him finding the world too- small, too mundane for someone like him. also "i have never spent a moment loving anyone but you" is pynch coded
i bet on losing dogs by mitski - pynch. this one brings the scene where ronan beats adam's dad up in trb. and also just. each other. theyre each other's losing dogs. you get what i mean? (this could also be jordeclan as well but it leans more pynch in my mind.)
father by the front bottoms - adam and declan. they both have very complicated relationships with their fathers - adam hates his, declan resents and loves his in equal measures, and tries to hate him (and fails). the "part native american" part reminds me of niall's dreaming. idk why. and the "fall asleep at the wheel and crash my car" is declan to me. it runs in a similar vein to his thoughts about diving into the ocean and never returning.
little moth by chloe moriondo - declan. okay listen. GREYWAREN. THE MOTH. GRHEJFSKRH ITS SELF EXPLANATORY TO ME OKAY. RAUGHGHGH
alligator skin boots by mccafferty - adam. ok listen i know i've talked a bunch abt this song and trc before but hear me out. "i aint sorry with broken wrists" is him sacrificing himself to cabeswater to me. "twinkle twinkle little star, alcoholics don't get far" is his dad. "i climb from these walls" is leaving it all behind, his trailer and his old self and henrietta in the dreamer trilogy.
bottom by mccafferty - pynch. just has those vibes yk
bug like an angel by mitski - the lynches. also has those vibes.
the entirety of stick season by noah kahan - adam.
#the raven cycle#trc#the dreamer trilogy#td3#adam parrish#ronan lynch#pynch#declan lynch#i dont have any good songs for the others sory#anyway you can tell who i think abt more#plus my music taste just generally leans toward what i like. picture for them anyway yk what i mean#i might have more but I might as well post this now#its been in my drafts since may or smth#no I will never shut up about mccafferty songs
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parker being the one to voice concerns that nate is getting more sadistic is so funny to me. twenty minutes ago you poisoned someone & started giggling and kicking your feet when they passed out
#the order 23 job#parker leverage#parker#leverage#nathan ford#leverageposting#wren speaks#to be fair i think it’s like. parker doesn’t mind hurting people & she doesn’t feel bad abt it or whatever. but that’s apathy not sadism.#she likes tasing people bc it shuts them up. she laughs about stabbing & drugging bc it’s just a natural thing that’s gonna happen in her#line of work so logically she isn’t gonna feel ashamed or guilty. but she also doesn’t necessarily get any enjoyment out of it. so nate#appearing to enjoy tormenting & hurting someone is a little concerning to parker. it’s apathy vs sadism.#(and she does start thinking more morally abt not hurting ppl but this is early season 2 & she doesn’t mind much yet)#it’s just funny that she’s like telling on him to sophie. as if she didn’t drug someone. plus sophie is like ‘ik its kinda hot right?’.#they’ve made him a thief & now they’re letting him get a taste for blood. fun family dynamics :-)#enabling is their love language
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i will never understand how some people can actively shit on something they know someone loves and finds joy in right in front of them. how can you hate something that makes someone else happy in this absolutely fucked world in front of them.
its the passive aggression for no reason i will never ever understand or do to others. if you have a passion, fucking LIVE it. if nothing else, passion gets us through every shitty day, and i will always support it.
have passion in spite of those who hate.
#its absolutely mind boggling to me#and genuinely makes me so fucjinf upset#i was sitting next to my sister who has been nicer to me than usual as she is talking to her online friend and im doing my nails silently b#its her polish and i didnt wanna take it out of her room. but i look up and shes ranking music genres which is all cool. but without#hesitation as the first one at the most bottom tier she put kpop. like i understand its not her cup of tea but i was like okay thats#something that actively makes me wanna keep living yaknow. and she knows that. so i was like#‘interesting placement for kpop’ and she didnt say anything so i said ‘im not sure youve listened to it enough to have such a violent#opinion on it’ and she immediately got angry saying shes ‘heard enough’ and then got mad at me for saying that saying why was i being ‘like#this what the fuck’ and my heart genuinely sunk into my ass but i couldnt leave even though i felt like crying bc i only did one hand and i#was drying at that moment plus i didn’t wanna make it a big deal. but this is not the first time she’s actively hated on my music without#prompt from me and it just makes me ????? like. music taste differs with everyone i understand this and i respect it. if something brings u#happiness then i would love to hear and listen even if i wouldn’t choose it myself. but being a bitch about it. idk#ultimately its the fact of being mean for no reason over someone else’s passion makes u a fucking asshole#:)))) im not crying bye#ashley rambles#to delete later#my mom and brother do it too btw. hating on it and making sure i hear it.#my mom was doing it the other day and my 7 year old nephew kept saying ‘pook i love it. i think its cool’ and it made me cry because kids#have the capacity for such unaltered kindness as the world has yet been cruel to them#idk man
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Today I was watching Toddler Ro run around the colony doing his thing (mostly bugwatching) when he started to get tired. He's perfectly capable of going to bed by himself, but Henry came over to carry him to his crib anyway. I bet Ro thinks Henry is the coolest big brother ever. <3
Andy drew a very helpful label/sign on the ship landing platform in case the landing beacons weren't enough to let passing shuttles know where they were supposed to touch down.
We had guests from the Hare Clan, and one of them was our ex-colonist Boomer, who we let go in a Diplomatic Marriage event.
He is not married to Eggardus yet, but the Vikings of the Hare Clan did entomb him in a warcasket. Poor boy. I might not have liked him very much, but I think he deserved better than to be reduced to little more than a machine of war.
Then when the guests from the Hare Clan were departing, they left me this very thoughtful gift. I haven't decided if I'm going to keep it or not. Part of me thinks it would be a very weird thing to use, but another part of me thinks it would be really, really funny.
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#rimworld#gracie plays#The Animist Alliance#art#my art#traditional art#rimworld art#unpolished art#slightly more polished art than usual#Henry is engineered as a soldier#I think he is fiercely loyal to everyone at Eureka#And if they won't let him fight to protect them then the least he can do is carry them to bed when their legs are tired#He's definitely strong enough#Plus I thought it'd be cute to draw#Just like Andy's adorable rocketship drawing#“Spaceships go here” he says as he scribbles with chalk on the landing platform#I wondered if we'd ever see Boomer again#I'm glad he came to visit but it makes me a bit sad at the same time#I liked his whacky old-timey sleazy salesman vibe#Big robots and battlesuits aren't really to my taste#which is an odd thing for a T'au player to say now that I think about it#Oh well I don't like the T'au for their battlesuits anyhow#Any ideas for what to do with the thoughtful gift of muffalo mammaries are welcome#Have a fabulous day everyone!! xoxo
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I wish some people never had access to internet at all...
TW assault, TW r*pe
#this is one of the main reasons why I don't get into the fandom that much and just stay in my own personal bubble#I already have a bad relationship with gilturia and I just can't see those two together without having a bad taste in my mouth#despite the fact there's a lot good art with those two#and I know that not all gilturia shippers are like that#and I understand that most of them ship those two because they just look aesthetically pleasing and look good together but still...#I can't just look calmly at those two especially knowing their background and how Gilgamesh actually treats her#and honestly because of such moments sometimes I feel disgust towards Gil (obviously) but I also feel disgust towards myself#for liking such terrible character#and honestly I fear that someday because of such moments I would stop liking him or even start to hate him#but I don't want that because despite his negative traits he still is well written and very deep character that has a lot of layers to him#plus he helped me to get thought a lot of hardships especially after these past two years throughout which I got attached to him even more#and his quote that he said to Hakuno ''No matter what adversity you face there's no other way for you but forward''#cheered me up a lot of times#sorry for the rant#I just had this things building up in my chest and these tweets just made me kinda snap#my ramblings#personal
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see the thing that makes stories interesting is conflict. Which is why audiences don’t tend to enjoy it when a story goes “plot twist! there was never any conflict to begin with!”
#This is about Chuuya not being a vampire in the first place#And Dazai pulling the “I knew everything all along and it was all according to plan”#plus any emotional or psychological conflict both of them would have had over the entire situation#it’s just. Eurghhhhhh#bad.#it’s. not enjoyable to most audiences unless you like it for reasons of personal taste#Because “there was never any conflict to begin with” carries just about the same weight as “it was all a dream”#Oh that thing that I thought happened? The thing that made the story interesting? Yeah it never happened.#my GUY. why tell a story if not to tell it sincerely.#like I said before this is the same as marvel movies killing their sincere moments with quips and one-liners
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i am hoping to never have to get another colonoscopy again (until i’m old enough to need to get them etc etc) but tbh i would very much like to experience the relief and comfort i felt when i woke up, was able to eat a warm meal (meatloaf + mashed potatoes, perfect comfort food (and it being soft was great bc i had had a endoscopy and broncoscopy done too so my throat was SORE)) for the first time in over 24 hours, got to wear super comfy anti-blood-clot compression boots, was on regular doses of IV tylenol and therefore the most pain free i had been in ages, and then got to sleep for the rest of the day. AND there was the joy of being told i didn’t have crohn’s. it was solid
#marzi speaks#the colonoscopy prep SUCKED and i never wanna do that shit again#4 liters of shit yourself juice that tastes like saltwater#(plus a couple extra cups of miralax bc i had been on a muscle relaxer specifically meant to get my intestines to move slower)#plus all the walking back and forth to the bathroom ended up causing so much blood to leak into the soles of my feet#that not only was i basically walking on bruises that were only getting worse#but my swollen blood vessels had started to pinch my nerves which put me in the worst pain i have ever been in in my LIFE#genuinely i was getting delirious from the amount of pain i was in. brain entered full panic mode it hurt so fucking bad#thankfully my dad was there and got them to get me a dose of morphine. which was VERY pleasant#and made me immediately understand the dangers of opiates#bc i had one dose months ago and if i was offered another. i wouldn’t take it but i would lowkey want to#morphine felt Great . killed the nerve pain and while my feet were still sore i no longer cared. it was beautiful#ANYWAYS i don’t miss being hospitalized and scared but i do miss the sheer level of comfort i felt right after that operation#i was so tired and i knew the worst of it was over now so it was just. pure relief. i melted. fell asleep and stayed asleep mostly
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Ok but the thing about Caroline and Klaus is that she makes him want to be good. To be worthy.
She brings his humanity out, and that is good for him.
#vampire diaries#caroline forbes#klaus mikaelson#i really love them#plus he has EXCELLENT taste in dresses#the dress he gives her for prom is just... perfection#like i loved it years ago#and now i'm mildly disappointed that i don't get to see it yet
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I have to take two more lots of penicillin today I'm gonna fucking SCREAM (vent in the tags)
#vent tw#vomit tw#i thought tablets would be better than the liquid i had earlier in the year#bc i had to have these massive capsule antibiotcs recently and i was able to have those easy despite usually being terrible with pills#and my mom had some capsule penicillin recently so i thought id have the same thing#nope!#im having phenoxymethylpenicillin#and its the most disgusting thing in the fucking world!!!!!!#and its so bitter and big it triggers my gag reflex so i have to fight to get these two massive pills down my painful ass throat#had to try and fall asleep earlier after taking them bc they made me feel so much fucking worse#might have to call up the doctors and ask if theres anything else i can have because oh my god i hate this shit#id even have liquid over this because despite the taste lingering at least i havent been throwing it back up#i have like 24 more of these fucking tablets or smth like that#it was meant to be more but i lost two earlier to throwing up for the first time in my life!!!! 💀#if i ever have tonsilittis again istfg its the most miserable experience ever bc its like every illness combined plus disgusting ass tablets#also if ive misepelled anything im so sorry like i said i had to sleep after my last lot so i just woke up#about to take my third technically fourth lot of the day wish me luck :(
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Wistfully thinks of Spellwind, I should make a headcanons up to ep 31 list its just my equivalent of like Skyrim or lotr where theres so much going on and so dense but god damn one of my favorite episodes was when two of my favorite characters became trees and the entire experience was like...they were tripping on shrooms but also one with the shrooms? Its like episode 8
and I love the dms orc captain that hates going on land and is there for the in between transportation from sea to sea land to land ferryman (not really I feel like its mostly hard to narrate and have a character at the same time) I just love captain buttocks' (yeah I'm pretty sure thats his name) humor and how him and djett ('jet') were closer in the beginning
I love ty and varsha together but I also ship smith with them as time went on, I can't tell who I want to joke as the third smith and varsha are friends to lovers, ty and varsha are irritated assholes to lovers, smith is just a jaded old fuck that loves his morons (he respects varsha a lot and thinks ty is an entertaining idiot)
Varsha and Djett are siblings they love each other like family and share different spells and potions and knowledge of interest notes
I feel like the only person really thinking too deeply about this tabletop story and wanted to drop a few lines of appreciation, I like listening to it to go to sleep since its so slow paced and gently spoken and the music and sound efx is so sweet
#spellwind#ttrpg#table story#homebrews are my favorite of genre of story telling right now#its what got me into midnight burger#Spotify knew what kinda creative storytelling I liked and said#pbbt here you go guy you need to listen to more audiodramas without the dice in the mix#the way podcasts can tell stories is so cool#dice rolling#describing everything thats going on in a natural dialogue so that it paints a picture for the person listening as if theyre part of it#like youre in the environment with them it was a really smart way to carve a story and narrative#wolf 359#wolf 395#idk off the top of my head I'm trying out a few episodes but I like how its a blend of that similar storytelling method but like also??#log entries and some conversation between characters which is mostly how midnight burger does it#aaaa I just love audiodramas#and tabletop actual plays#I want so badly to do ttrpgs but this is my live vicarious through the media I consume era until I can find ppl that wanna let me take try#and be a DM#I could totally make engaging stories like the things I listen to#its like execution of the stories that go on inside my head the tones the themes I wanna touch on the emotions I want to convey#at the same time theres a small part of me thats like mehh but they did it already but I can still share that vibe for people that either#have or haven't chewed up the same things I love over and over and over like a maniac#plus I still have my own take and taste and ideas its just a time and place thing#I have a trillion ideas written out I just have to sort them out and do some stitchwork on the canvas that is the blank page#embroidery on those sweet words and patchwork a story ive been brewing in mind#this is slightly a personal ramble about story making#and also a segway into a sideblog thats not 100% midnight burger#I wonder how this blog will evolve over time
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this day6 comeback is not hitting the spot for me ngl
#the mv is boring#the songs all sound like like i've heard them already somewhere#the only one i liked was 'sad ending' but even that one is not even close to any of negentropy or demon songs#in terms of it being interesting musically#idk i guess this day6 is not for me anymore#plus all their voices sounded weirdly processed?#idk usually there is at least one song on their albums that is absolutely life changing and like three others#that always end up as my faves#and the rest are nice if not my favorites#this time it's just one that's nice#i don't see myself returning to this album#it's like they took every element i didn't like abt negentropy and youngk's solos and made a whole album out of it lol#i am used to day6 music catering to my tastes specifically so I'm feeling left out#goofy ass album 3/10 do not recommend
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somehow these current roommates we have are the worst that ive known yet and last semester we literally had a girl who smoked cigs IN her bedroom. list of grievances below lol
#first of all they turn all the lights on all the time. the other day i was hanging out in the living room w one light on bc it was light#enough outside thru the windows and one of them walked in and flipped another light on automatically. then walked through#the living room right to her bedroom... girl youre not even using this room and i was clearly fine with the light level??#they always have all 3 kitchen lights on when they cook and dont turn them off plus none of them have lamps#they all use the Big LED Ceiling Light in their bedrooms which is baffling to us#they dont know how to organize the kitchen and they took up so many of the cabinets with bullshit. like 3 pans here a few plates there#we have like 4 cabinets worth of food and even more of pots and pans and shit bc this is everything we own#and we cant afford to use disposable everything like some of them do#theyre always leaving the fridge open while they cook too and i have to physically hold myself back from becoming my mom#and yelling at them to close the fridge when theyre not actively getting smth out of it!! like theyll stand there cooking and have it open#for 2 minutes straight#theres only room for one water filter pitcher in the fridge and one of them brought a big one which is nice but theyre always forgetting to#refill it which defeats the purpose of even having it#and they always somehow start cooking right when we decide we need to eat#one of them sent this long sort of condescending post abt ants and how it stresses him out when the kitchen is messy so we all need to clean#more and try harder to keep ants away as if 1) ants care at all abt dishes in the sink or stains on the stove and 2) as if the ants will#stop coming around if theres no food out in this building where there are notoriously always ants even on the 4th floor#(we are ground floor this time) and 3) as if he isn't one of the people leaving food around and not taking the trash out#nobody responded to it in the groupchat lmao bc he sounds like a fucking cop!! and is dating an rotc guy??? and also is a streamer or just#likes to play games on vc with friends bc hes always very loudly doing that#but obviously we have sex all the time so we're at a sort of loud noise stalemate where neither of us can complain abt the other#to be clear this is in no way the absolute worst situation theyre nice enough people and havent reported us for anything (they both work for#student housing -_-) and generally things go okay in the apartment#but like. ive never been this annoyed this often with any other roommates#ALSO someone spilled soy sauce all over our designated level of the fridge door where we had all our little bottles of stuff#but also a carton a Paper Carton of milk and a pack of butter standing upright which soaked up the soy sauce and for several days#even after id cleaned the bottom of the carton the best i could i swore it tasted like soy sauce from it soaking into the bottom or smth#but it's still all over everything in there bc it was so much it like. pooled in there and splattered on everything#like. u see that happen u clean it up wtf.??#anyway i just felt like i needed to complain and see if im being silly or if these things really are so annoying
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my thoughts on ddd basically boil down to "great game! kill the story with fire and sticks." which i think is about the coldest take ever. do not get me started on how nobodies having hearts is a dumbfuck plot twist i am so full of rage over that.
#it ruins roxas' entire character i swear#also sidenote soras evidence for nobodies having hearts is. hilarious#his examples are xion; namine; roxas; and axel#xion isnt even a nobody#namine is only considered a nobody on a technicality#roxas is generally an exception to a lot of nobody rules. also him having emotions and that being an abnormality is like. a plot point#and axel generally doesnt have emotions! he only ever has them relating to sora or roxas and he is genuinely shocked the first time he-#-realizes that he can feel something because of them#he literally dies saying '[roxas] made me feel like i had a heart... its funny- you make me feel the same way'#that weird ability they have to make axel feel things is a big part of why he cares so much about roxas and sora#and to say that 'he actually had a heart' is just a bad misinterpreting of what was already there#and if i didnt know any better i would assume there was a different writer for this game#its poorly thought out and directly contradicted on multiple occasions#plus you cant tell me xemnas really tricked all these people into thinking they didnt have hearts. like. at the very least VEXEN would have#also if they always felt things and xemnas gaslighted them into thinking it wasnt real#then why would axel notice anything special about sora and roxas at all. wouldnt he just treat emotions caused by them like everything else#-and talk himself into thinking they werent real? like its just not thought out#also to me it makes xemnas a less interesting villain. i dont mind his big secret plot i think its fine honestly.#but i much prefer the option of xemnas taking advantage of people who were desperate to him gaslighting and lying#its more personal taste but like. idk#also literally do not get me started on how this twist sucks for roxas' character. its just plain bad for him.#he fought tooth and nail and fucking died saying he deserved to exist whether or not he had a heart#and to look at him and go 'dont worry you get one now' is just bad! and i hate it!!#anyways. i fucking despise this games story#kingdom hearts#doodles#sora#roxas#riku#lea
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I have to keep reminding myself that even if I like my coworkers and do occasionally spend time with them outside of work, that I’m not really friends with them. Like they all go out together and see each other fairly regularly outside of work and I get invited occasionally. I feel like a loser for never going but like. I like my friends. I want to spend time with my friends. But man does it make you REALLY feel isolated when everyone is making inside jokes and you just sit there not understanding.
#plus they usually go to bars or get high and I feel like even more of a loser#because I don’t drink legit just cuz I can’t stand how it tastes but I feel like they think it’s cuz I’m boring#and I don’t smoke again cuz I don’t like how it feels/tastes#I don’t vape smoke drink club nothing.#literally only because I genuinely don’t enjoy those things not because I’m against them for others#I get a kick out of doing my bowling league and watching movies with my friends while sober#and that makes it look like (I worry) that I’m boring#I don’t know I just feel super self conscious about it some days#but I’ve always kept work and my personal life extremely separate#ive never (or very very rarely) worked with friends I knew outside of work or saw coworkers outside of work#I wish I could be satisfied with what I have because what I have is GOOD without getting self conscious about what I lack
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