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hollowed-theory-hall · 7 months ago

Note

your post on harry’s handwriting was an eye-opener for me! ik his writing resembled his mother some and is decent overall, but i’ve never seen pics of it!

idk where the horde of fanfic writers came up with the weird notion that harry has bad/chicken scratch handwriting, which triggers me every. time. they make out his handwriting to be messy, his eating habits sloppy, his speech behaviour bumbling, his appearance unkempt, and that he’s rather messy as a person. which boggles the mind, because he’s used to cleaning up after the dursleys and probably enjoys an orderly space, if not super spic and span??? is it only certain fandoms, cuz they make the other character(s) all elegance personified and well-mannered? like, harry already is a well-mannered boy, otherwise petunia would’ve been tutting, clucking, and dying of shame even more before the nieghbours lmaoo. idk whether to cry or laugh, and sometimes it’s such a turn-off that i choose to rage quit fics.

please, if you have the time, i would love a thorough breakdown/meta on how harry actually comes across as a person!

Okay, I have so much to say about this. And omg, Harry's chicken scratch handwriting is one of my pet peeves in fics (here's the handwriting post, btw). Harry's characterization when done wrong in general, tbh is a huge turn-off for me. Becouse I love Harry, he's my boy.

So, what we're gonna look at is how other characters in the books perceive Harry, how he comes across in universe to people who can't read his mind (like we can, as the readers).

I'll start with a general note about how most characters in the books don't really know Harry. This is mostly because Harry, contrary to fanon interpretations, is a very private person and rarely talks about himself/his feelings/his thoughts out loud. This is a habit I believe was ingrained into him by the Dursleys.

Like, I mentioned in the past Harry doesn't talk as much as other characters. Scenes of the trio usually consist of mostly Ron and Hermione talking, for example. This is not becouse he doesn't have thoughts (he's quite judgmental inside his head, and we know he has a lot to say), but becouse he's used to not voicing a lot of them thanks to the Dursleys.

This essay turned out pretty long, but here we go:

How do others see Harry?

Harry comes off as confident. Harry is a defiant and courageous person, and this often comes off as confidence to other people. It's why Snape thinks Harry is arrogant and why most students are always sure Harry meant to do what he did. They think he has shit together because he comes off like he does:

Harry stayed silent. Snape was trying to provoke him into telling the truth. He wasn’t going to do it. Snape had no proof — yet. “How extraordinarily like your father you are, Potter,” Snape said suddenly, his eyes glinting. “He too was exceedingly arrogant. A small amount of talent on the Quidditch field made him think he was a cut above the rest of us too. Strutting around the place with his friends and admirers . . . The resemblance between you is uncanny.” “My dad didn’t strut,” said Harry, before he could stop himself. “And neither do I.”

(PoA, Ch14)

Snape sees Harry as arrogant, when in fact Harry is just defiant and intelligent.

“But you’ve been too busy saving the Wizarding world,” said Ginny, half laughing. “Well ... I can’t say I’m surprised. I knew this would happen in the end. I knew you wouldn’t be happy unless you were hunting Voldemort. Maybe that’s why I like you so much.”

(HBP, Ch30)

Ginny (and other characters) believe he likes to save the wizarding world. That he is this confident hero and savior. I mean, they believe her lie about the tattoo, which says a lot:

and all Romilda Vane does is ask me if it’s true you’ve got a hippogriff tattooed across your chest.” Ron and Hermione both roared with laughter. Harry ignored them. “What did you tell her?” “I told her it’s a Hungarian Horntail,” said Ginny, turning a page of the newspaper idly. “Much more macho.”

(HBP, Ch25)

Harry doesn't see himself as leader material, but it's clear everyone else does:

“I think we ought to elect a leader,” said Hermione. “Harry’s leader,” said Cho at once, looking at Hermione as though she were mad, and Harry’s stomach did yet another back flip. “Yes, but I think we ought to vote on it properly,” said Hermione, unperturbed. “It makes it formal and it gives him authority. So — everyone who thinks Harry ought to be our leader?” Everybody put up their hands, even Zacharias Smith, though he did it very halfheartedly. “Er — right, thanks,” said Harry, who could feel his face burning.

(OotP, Ch18)

Neville Longbottom, who gave a roar of delight, leapt down from the mantelpiece and yelled. “I knew you’d come! I knew it, Harry!”

(DH, Ch28)

“Look who it is! Didn’t I tell you?” As Harry emerged into the room beyond the passage, there were several screams and yells: “HARRY!” “It’s Potter, it’s POTTER!” “Ron!” “Hermione!” [...] “Are you all right, Harry?” Neville was saying. “Want to sit down? I expect you’re tired, aren’t—?” “No,” said Harry. He looked at Ron and Hermione, trying to tell them without words that Voldemort has just discovered the loss of one of the other Horcruxes. Time was running out fast: If Voldemort chose to visit Hogwarts next, they would miss their chance. “We need to get going,” he said, and their expression told him that they understood. “What are we going to do, then, Harry?” asked Seamus. “What’s the plan?” “Plan?” repeated Harry. He was exercising all his willpower to prevent himself succumbing again to Voldemort’s rage: His scar was still burning. “Well, there’s something we—Ron, Hermione, and I—need to do, and then we’ll get out of here.” Nobody was laughing or whooping anymore. Neville looked confused.

(DH, Ch29)

Everyone expected Harry in DH to have a plan of attack the moment he arrived because that's how he acts. Even in the above scene, he's in terrible pain from his scar, but the others don't see it. What they see is a Harry who looks exhausted but says no to rest because there's work to be done and they expect this of him. They see someone fearless and capable with a plan who could lead them, but this isn't what we see because we're inside his head.

How Harry doesn't speak much and acts overall quite distant, as in, he actively avoids the girls who fancy him:

Then he blinked and looked around: He was surrounded by mesmerized girls. “Hi, Harry!” said a familiar voice from behind him. “Neville!” said Harry in relief, turning to see a round-faced boy struggling toward him

(HBP, Ch7)

And he only has two close friends and barley knows the other students in his year. Most students only know Harry Potter from the stories, rumors, and Dumbledore's end-of-the-year speeches about his heroism. They have no clue who the real Harry is — so they expect the hero they do hear about.

He stands his ground a lot (again, defiance):

Harry turned to McLaggen to tell him that, most unfortunately, Ron had beaten him, only to find McLaggen’s red face inches from his own. He stepped back hastily. “His sister didn’t really try,” said McLaggen menacingly. There was a vein pulsing in his temple like the one Harry had often admired in Uncle Vernon’s. “She gave him an easy save.” “Rubbish,” said Harry coldly. “That was the one he nearly missed.”

(HBP, Ch11)

And more often than not, he does so coldly and calmly. A lot of his more fiery anger is a sign of trauma with Harry, his baseline anger reaction is cold.

All of this adds to him appearing to others as controlled, confident, and like he has everything together and could never have any issues. He comes off as this bigger than life person to most people. Snape isn't the only one who reads Harry's behavior as confident. But it's actually far from the truth.

We, as the readers, see how depressed Harry is. How lowly he thinks of himself and how much he doesn't think of himself as anything special when he very clearly is. But the fact he doesn't say any of it and has mastered the skill of acting cold and like everything is fine when he literally wants to die at the age of 5, no one knows. Even Ron and Hermione didn't truly realize the full extent of Harry's low self-worth until 5th year.

The other students are shocked to see Harry as angry as he is in book 5 because he's often way more controlled and well-mannered than that. They're used to seeing him cold and quiet, not firey. Most of his fire stays inside his head unless he's really angry or emotional in general (or traumatized):

Professor Umbridge sat down behind her desk again. Harry, however, stood up. Everyone was staring at him; Seamus looked half-scared, half-fascinated. “Harry, no!” Hermione whispered in a warning voice, tugging at his sleeve, but Harry jerked his arm out of her reach. “So, according to you, Cedric Diggory dropped dead of his own accord, did he?” Harry asked, his voice shaking. There was a collective intake of breath from the class, for none of them, apart from Ron and Hermione, had ever heard Harry talk about what had happened on the night that Cedric had died. They stared avidly from Harry to Professor Umbridge

(OotP, Ch12)

The shock of the other students, I believe, is because of what he's saying, yes, but it's also because Harry is behaving very unlike him here. He usually doesn't shout at teachers or anyone, really. He rarely speaks in classes actually.

And regarding his confidence, everyone, Ron and Hermione included, was sure Harry is super skilled and that that's how he evaded Voldemort:

“You don’t know what it’s like! You — neither of you — you’ve never had to face him, have you? You think it’s just memorizing a bunch of spells and throwing them at him, like you’re in class or something? The whole time you know there’s nothing between you and dying except your own — your own brain or guts or whatever — like you can think straight when you know you’re about a second from being murdered, or tortured, or watching your friends die — they’ve never taught us that in their classes, what it’s like to deal with things like that — and you two sit there acting like I’m a clever little boy to be standing here, alive, like Diggory was stupid, like he messed up — you just don’t get it, that could just as easily have been me, it would have been if Voldemort hadn’t needed me —” “We weren’t saying anything like that, mate,” said Ron, looking aghast. “We weren’t having a go at Diggory, we didn’t — you’ve got the wrong end of the —” He looked helplessly at Hermione, whose face was stricken.

(OotP, Ch15)

They didn't for a second think he wasn't confident in his own abilities because Harry acts in a way that comes off as confident and capable. It's why everyone so easily accepts him as a leader under various circumstances. He acts level-headed while he's terrified, so everyone thinks he knows what he's doing except Harry (and the reader). Ron and Hermione had zero doubts Harry's skill was a big part of why he survived book 4, it's only Harry who doesn't think that.

The fact Snape bothered to extract his own memories during his Occlumancy lessons goes to show how he thinks Harry is talented, contrary to his words. He feared Harry would reverse the connection and see into his mind, otherwise he wouldn't have taken these precautions.

Think of Voldemort’s resurrection even. Inside his mind, we know Harry's terrified. We know he has no idea what he's doing.

But imagine being a Death Eater in the crowd and you see this 14-year-old kid stand up after being Crucio-ed by their lord, and he stands up, resists the imperius, and shouts at your lord like he thinks of himself as equal to him — or, perhaps, better than him:

“I asked you whether you want me to do that again,” said Voldemort softly. “Answer me! Imperio!” [...] I WON’T!” And these words burst from Harry’s mouth; they echoed through the graveyard, and the dream state was lifted as suddenly as though cold water had been thrown over him — back rushed the aches that the Cruciatus Curse had left all over his body — back rushed the realization of where he was, and what he was facing. . . . “You won’t?” said Voldemort quietly, and the Death Eaters were not laughing now.

(GoF, Ch34)

That's pretty badass. Harry comes off like a confidant badass. And he gets more badass and confident as he matures (even if he isn't actually as confident as he appears).

Even in the DoM, Lucius Malfoy, who was in the graveyard, takes Harry seriously:

“Don’t do anything,” he [Harry] muttered. “Not yet —” The woman who had mimicked him let out a raucous scream of laughter. “You hear him? You hear him? Giving instructions to the other children as though he thinks of fighting us!” “Oh, you don’t know Potter as I do, Bellatrix,” said Malfoy softly. “He has a great weakness for heroics; the Dark Lord understands this about him. Now give me the prophecy, Potter.”

(OotP, Ch35)

Bellatrix makes fun of how Harry gives the other kids orders as if they're going to fight, but Lucius knows better, he knows Harry is going to fight, and I think, he's scared of what would happen when he does. Even Bellatrix quickly starts taking Harry more seriously:

“Oh, he knows how to play, little bitty baby Potter,” she said, her mad eyes staring through the slits in her hood. “Very well, then —”

(OotP, Ch35)

And she changes her tone completely after he casts a Crucio at her:

“Never used an Unforgivable Curse before, have you, boy?” she yelled. She had abandoned her baby voice now.

(OotP, Ch36)

His aura is one of competence and confidence even when he's frightened and has no idea what he's doing. Especially when he's frightened and has no idea what he's doing.

And for the most part, he doesn't come off nearly as judgmental as he actually is, because he doesn't say a lot of what he thinks. We only see him start to actually speak his mind and be more sassy out loud around 5th and 6th year. And even then, his highly judgmental physical descriptions stay part of his narration, they aren't spoken:

“That’s the bell,” said Harry listlessly, because Ron and Hermione were bickering too loudly to hear it. They did not stop arguing all the way down to Snape’s dungeon, which gave Harry plenty of time to reflect that between Neville and Ron he would be lucky ever to have two minutes’ conversation with Cho that he could look back on without wanting to leave the country.

(OotP, Ch12)

Ron and Hermione banter while Harry feels done with them, but he doesn't really say anything or complain. He keeps a lot of his thoughts inside his head.

If we look at how Ron, Hermione, and Sirius see Harry, they're the closest to who Harry actually is as these three know Harry best. (They're also more objective than Harry who looks down on himself)

After the book 5 conversation I mentioned above, Ron and Hermione are more aware of Harry's insecurities, but they find them silly. They see Harry as incredibly capable and skilled:

“Did he?” said Harry. Behind him he felt rather than heard Hermione passing his message to the others and he sought to keep talking, to distract the Death Eaters.

(OotP, Ch35)

“What are we going to do with them?” Ron whispered to Harry through the dark; then, even more quietly, “Kill them? They’d kill us. They had a good go just now.” Hermione shuddered and took a step backward. Harry shook his head. “We just need to wipe their memories,” said Harry.

(DH, Ch9)

When danger comes, everyone's instantly following Harry's lead. Harry's the planner when the situation is dangerous, he calls the shots, not Hermione. Hermione and Ron look to Harry for a plan when things get tough, and Harry always figures something out. Now, we see Harry thinking he has no idea what to do:

He could not think what to do but to keep talking. Neville’s arm was pressed against his, and he could feel him shaking. He could feel one of the other’s quickened breath on the back of his head. He was hoping they were all thinking hard about ways to get out of this, because his mind was blank.

(OotP, Ch35)

But Ron and Hermione don't. No one does. They just see Harry coming up with a plan to save them. Every time. They don't see him wracking his brain for a way to keep everyone alive.

Hermione never considers Harry stupid, not even in first year:

“I’m not as good as you,” said Harry, very embarrassed, as she let go of him. “Me!” said Hermione. “Books! And cleverness! There are more important things — friendship and bravery and — oh Harry — be careful!”

(PS, Ch16)

And Ron clearly doesn't expect stupid behavior from Harry. He's surprised and shocked when Harry does something he considers stupid:

“What the hell,” panted Ron, holding up the Horcrux, which swung backward and forward on its shortened chain in some parody of hypnosis, “didn’t you take this thing off before you dived?”

(DH, 19)

Both Ron and Hermione trust Harry's opinion and they trust him to know what to do when shit hits the fan. When things are dangerous, both Ron and Hermione (and everyone else) turn to Harry to know what to do becouse that's the aura he has:

“I’d tell him we’re all with him in spirit,” said Lupin, then hesitated slightly. “And I’d tell him to follow his instincts, which are good and nearly always right.” Harry looked at Hermione, whose eyes were full of tears. “Nearly always right,” she repeated.

(DH, Ch22)

Hermione agrees with Lupin's assessment here. Dumbledore did too, he's the one who told Kingsley and Remus to trust Harry's instincts. Harry doesn't give the impression he's messy and bumbling, quite the opposite. Yes, Harry and Hermione have their doubts, they don't agree with Harry on everything, especially when he has no evidence for his claim except his intuition. But, it's telling Harry can make claims based on gut feeling and Ron and Hermione ask him why he thinks that instead of just instantly rejecting the claims.

Like I mentioned above, he looks like he has his shit together even when he really doesn't. He's an expert in keeping a mask on and bottling up his feelings.

Sirius, also sees Harry as mature and capable for his age. It's why he's so insistent on telling him things while Molly wants to cuddle Harry:

“I don’t intend to tell him more than he needs to know, Molly,” said Sirius. “But as he was the one who saw Voldemort come back” (again, there was a collective shudder around the table at the name), “he has more right than most to —” “He’s not a member of the Order of the Phoenix!” said Mrs. Weasley. “He’s only fifteen and —” “— and he’s dealt with as much as most in the Order,” said Sirius, “and more than some —” “No one’s denying what he’s done!” said Mrs. Weasley, her voice rising, her fists trembling on the arms of her chair. “But he’s still—” “He’s not a child!” said Sirius impatiently.

(OotP, Ch5)

Between them, Sirius sees Harry more accurately. Harry is incredibly mature and capable and wants to be in the know. He'd be better off in the know. Sirius understands Harry's curiosity which Molly seems unaware of. Lupin also remarks on how Harry is going to find out things anyway, he's aware of how curious and determined Harry is. Sirius considers Harry capable even during PoA and GoF:

I know better than anyone that you can look after yourself and while you’re around Dumbledore and Moody I don’t think anyone will be able to hurt you.

(GoF, Ch18)

Molly, on the other hand, never really sees Harry's capabilities. Molly only ever sees a polite, intelligent kid. In the early years at the Weasley, Harry barely talks to Molly and Arthur because he doesn't really know how to talk to them. So they talk to him, the other Weasleys talk around him, and he's polite in turn:

“I don’t blame you, dear,” she assured Harry, tipping eight or nine sausages onto his plate. “Arthur and I have been worried about you, too. Just last night we were saying we’d come and get you ourselves if you hadn’t written back to Ron by Friday. But really” (she was now adding three fried eggs to his plate), “flying an illegal car halfway across the country — anyone could have seen you —”

(CoS, Ch3)

Harry acts around most adults like this, especially when younger. It's clear he acted this way around his teachers too:

“You see what you expect to see, Severus,” said Dumbledore, without raising his eyes from a copy of Transfiguration Today. “Other teachers report that the boy is modest, likable, and reasonably talented. Personally, I find him an engaging child.”

(DH, Ch33)

Snape got it a bit different. Because Harry is defiant and sassy — it's how he responds to the Dursleys, and this is how he responds to threats he can't do anything about in general. Sass. It's why we see Harry do this with Umbridge, Snape, and Scrimgeour:

Who do you imagine wants to attack children like yourselves?” inquired Professor Umbridge in a horribly honeyed voice. “Hmm, let’s think . . .” said Harry in a mock thoughtful voice, “maybe Lord Voldemort?”

(OotP, Ch12)

“Do you remember me telling you we are practicing nonverbal spells, Potter?” “Yes,” said Harry stiffly. “Yes, sir.” “There’s no need to call me ‘sir,’ Professor.”

(HBP, Ch9)

“...You may wear that scar like a crown, Potter, but it is not up to a seventeen-year-old boy to tell me how to do my job! It’s time you learned some respect!” “It’s time you earned it.” said Harry.

(DH, Ch7)

Harry appears confidant and arrogant not only to Snape but to Scrimgeour too (I think other students at Hogwarts see Harry as arrogant too. His demeanor can come off as arrogant if you don't know what he's thinking. It's why they could believe the Daily Prophet, it fit what they got to see). It's because he is rude and sassy when speaking his mind. It's because he acts more confident when he's terrified. It's because he's cold, distant, and uncaring towards most people and actively avoids talking to most.

And even that's mostly when he's older. In 4th year, he responds to Snape by glaring at him silently and wishing he could cast a Crucio at him:

Harry sat there staring at Snape as the lesson began, picturing horrific things happening to him. . . . If only he knew how to do the Cruciatus Curse . . . he’d have Snape flat on his back like that spider, jerking and twitching. . . .

(GoF, Ch18)

Harry is overall really quiet, which does create the impression of him being put together. More than he thinks of himself, for sure. It also adds to why many students feel as comfortable talking about him as they do because he feels distant to them. His quiet makes him feel mysterious, unknown, and far away. Like a symbol rather than a person.

Something I want to note, specifically with Umbridge, is this scene:

Harry looked around at Umbridge. She was watching him, her wide, toadlike mouth stretched in a smile. “Yes?” “Nothing,” said Harry quietly. He looked back at the parchment, placed the quill upon it once more, wrote I must not tell lies, and felt the searing pain on the back of his hand for a second time; once again the words had been cut into his skin, once again they healed over seconds later.

(OotP, Ch13)

Part of why Harry comes off as such a put-together badass is that he doesn't let others see his pain. He doesn't show he's in pain to others, especially when it's people he doesn't like. He acts though, constantly.

He hates crying in front of others becouse Harry does everything he can to not appear weak:

Harry suddenly realized that there were tears on his face mingling with the sweat. He bent his face as low as possible, wiping them off on his robes, pretending to do up his shoelace, so that Lupin wouldn’t see.

(PoA, Ch12)

And it works, people see him as confident, and capable, and heroic. Most people don't see the struggle because Harry keeps bottling it in.

Even with Hermione, he tries not to let her see how upset he actually is. We know in his head, that he is devastated by his wand breaking, that he's mourning it like it was a dead loved one, but this is what he's willing to show Hermione:

“It was an accident,” said Harry mechanically. He felt empty, stunned. “We’ll—we’ll find a way to repair it.” [...] “Well,” he said, in a falsely matter-of-fact voice, “well, I’ll just borrow yours for now, then. While I keep watch.”

(DH, Ch17)

All this means, we, as the readers , see Harry's pain, his struggles, his vulnerability — but the other characters almost never do.

The only character who is consistently aware of Harry's struggles is Sirius who Harry confides his weaknesses to more than any other character:

“Never mind me, how are you?” said Sirius seriously. “I’m —” For a second, Harry tried to say “fine” — but he couldn’t do it. Before he could stop himself, he was talking more than he’d talked in days

(GoF, Ch19)

Harry is so used to saying his fine and bearing his burdens in silence. It's what he does. It's what he did for years. Most characters think Harry is unshakable because that's how he acts.

Even when Harry tries to lie so Sirius won't worry, Sirius sees through it:

Nice try, Harry. I’m back in the country and well hidden. I want you to keep me posted on everything that’s going on at Hogwarts.

(GoF, Ch15)

As for his room and appearance, he is a little messy actually when he has the chance to be in seventh year:

Harry had spent the morning completely emptying his school trunk for the first time since he had packed it six years ago. At the start of the intervening school years, he had merely skimmed off the topmost three quarters of the contents and replaced or updated them, leaving a layer of general debris at the bottom—old quills, desiccated beetle eyes, single socks that no longer fit.

(DH, Ch2)

As in, his trunk is a bit of a mess. But this makes sense, I think. He allows himself to be messy when he doesn't have the Dursleys over his head. It's like a sort of freedom he didn't have before, so he indulges in it. I think the mess in his trunk is also a result of him actually living from it for 6 years, as he couldn't really leave everything at home with the Dursleys, could he? Still, his room and belongings are nowhere near as messy as Ron's.

As for his appearance, the only thing mentioned to be messy is his hair:

His jet-black hair, however, was just as it always had been — stubbornly untidy, whatever he did to it

(PoA, Ch1)

But from other characters (including Hermione) thinking Harry's hot:

“Oh, come on, Harry,” said Hermione, suddenly impatient. “It’s not Quidditch that’s popular, it’s you! You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable.”

(HBP, Ch11)

We can conclude Harry's messy hair comes off as cool and attractive and not like a bird's nest.

We also see from Hermione and others that Harry looks scary. He is 5'11 by book 6 with an intimidating glare and that he looks like he can throw a punch, (and can definitely throw a punch when he wants to). So he has a physical intimidation factor when older:

“Well, it’s like Hagrid said, they can look after themselves,” said Hermione impatiently, “and I suppose a teacher like Grubbly-Plank wouldn’t usually show them to us before N.E.W.T. level, but, well, they are very interesting, aren’t they? The way some people can see them and some can’t! I wish I could.” “Do you?” Harry asked her quietly. She looked horrorstruck. “Oh Harry — I’m sorry — no, of course I don’t — that was a really stupid thing to say —”

(OotP, Ch21)

Harry was not aware of releasing George, all he knew was that a second later both of them were sprinting at Malfoy. He had completely forgotten the fact that all the teachers were watching: All he wanted to do was cause Malfoy as much pain as possible. With no time to draw out his wand, he merely drew back the fist clutching the Snitch and sank it as hard as he could into Malfoy’s stomach — “Harry! HARRY! GEORGE! NO!” He could hear girls’ voices screaming, Malfoy yelling, George swearing, a whistle blowing, and the bellowing of the crowd around him, but he did not care, not until somebody in the vicinity yelled “IMPEDIMENTA!” and only when he was knocked over backward by the force of the spell did he abandon the attempt to punch every inch of Malfoy he could reach. . . .

(OotP, Ch19)

To summarise

Harry bottles up a lot of his emotions and tends to be quiet, this creates the often wrong impression he is confident and has his shit together.

He doesn't show pain and weakness to others and doesn't cry or show he's upset to basically anyone (except Sirius). This means basically no one sees his struggles or how depressed and traumatized Harry actually is. It even surprises Ron and Hermione in book 5.

He is defiant and rude to people he doesn't like, especially when scared, the result is that he appears like a very capable and confident badass especially when under pressure.

He can be intimidating with his glare alone and once he's older he is a physical presence. He's not someone who can disappear in a crowd post-book 5.

His rudeness oftentimes stays in his head except when someone really annoys him. This makes him appear defiant, but overall polite because he keeps most of his mean comments to himself.

When younger, he is very polite and quiet, especially toward adults. When he's older, he gets a little sassier (as in, he says some of his internal monologue out loud). But he is a polite, well-mannered kid for the most part.

The character who has a messy room, is a bit of a slob, has chicken scratch handwriting, and is lazy with schoolwork, is Ronald Weasley, who I love dearly, but these descriptions have nothing to do with Harry and everything to do with Ron.

The only unkempt thing about Harry's appearance is likely his Potter hair, which is more messy hot than messy bad (if all the girls' reactions are anything to go by).

#harry potter #hp #hp meta #hollowedtheory #harry potter meta #asks #anonymous #harry james potter #my best boy hjp

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ofstarsandvibranium · 8 months ago

Text

My Cup of Tea

Fandom: Marvel (Celebrity AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: You’ve spent 2 years trying to get Bucky Barnes on your interview show Coffee Shop Date and the chemistry is undeniable between you two.

You watch as Bucky takes a seat across from you. The small cafe in Brooklyn was empty besides you two. The smell of coffee beans brewing and pastries baking fill the air.

“So…it’s happened,” You state plainly.

Bucky chuckles as he settles into his seat more, “It has.”

“Did you finally get tired of rejecting me?” you ask with a teasing tilt of your head and a smirk on your lips. This has always been how you and Bucky behaved around each other at events.

It all started one fateful night at the Emmy's. His show, Echoes of the Crown, being nominated for Best Drama Series. He came up to you on the red carpet and he exclaimed excitement because he's watched your show. You then invited him to come on and he said he'd have to get back to you since his schedule is packed at the moment.

For the past two year, you've been keeping in contact with him and his publicist to see if your schedules would align. In-between that, you'd constantly tease him at events and award shows about how he keeps ghosting you. People of the internet have commented on the clear chemistry between you two, hoping that some day the stars would align and he'd be on your show.

After all this time, he's finally found the time to come onto your show Coffee Shop Date.

He laughs, “I wasn’t rejecting you! I’ve been busy!”

You roll your eyes, seemingly unconvinced, “That’s basically a nice way of rejecting someone, James.”

He playfully winces, “Oh boy. My government name. I’m in trouble, aren’t I?”

You take a sip from your mug. The cafe uses an array of mismatched dish and drinkware, giving the overall vibes of the place very fun and homey.

You change the subject, “Is this your go to place?”

He looks around and nods, “Yeah. One of my favorite places to go to when I’m home. They’ve been around for over fifty years.”

“It’s cute.”

“You’re cute.” Bucky says with a grin.

You bite back a smirk, “What’s your go to coffee order?”

“Black coffee or cold brew.”

You raise a brow at him, “No sugar? Do you hate sweet things?”

He smirks at you, “If I hated sweet things, I wouldn’t be on this date with you, would I?”

"Alright then, Casanova."

"You're not fond of black coffee?"

"Not my cup of tea," you say jokingly as you lift your mug to your lips for a sip.

"Well you're my cup of tea."

“…you’re laying it on thick, Barnes. You usually like this on dates?”

“Only when I really like the person.” You hide your smile in your mug and he asks, "What about you? You usually this snarky with your dates?"

You shrug, "Only with the ones who keep cancelling on me."

Bucky chuckles and shakes his head, "How long you gonna hold that over my head, sweetheart?"

"For as long as I want or until I find something else I can hold over you."

He takes a sip from his own cup and then gestures to yours, "You always drink tea?"

You glance down at the cup of hot black tea with milk and sugar and shake your head, "Not always. Depends how I'm feeling. Sometimes I like tea, other days coffee, or even a matcha."

He scrunches his face up in distaste, "I tried matcha and I don't really like it. Tastes like grass and dirt to me."

You scoff, "Maybe because you haven't tried good matcha. Some places have good matcha, others not so much."

"Maybe you can take me to a place with good matcha after all this," he gestures to the cameras and crew.

You look at him in surprise, "Are you asking me on a real date, Barnes?"

"Second date."

"So confident I'd want another date with you?"

He leans back in his chair with a smirk, "Sweetheart, for two years, you've been trying to get me to go on a coffee date with you. I'm pretty sure you'd like to go on a second date with me."

"So cocky."

This playful, flirtatious banter gave you a bit of a thrill. It was fun to flirt with Bucky and tease him. He was obviously a handsome man, but he was also charming and funny. There was just something about him that made you feel a little more daring and comfortable.

"So tell me, what's something that scares you?" he asks, as he rests his elbows on the table, leaning closer to you. His eyes completely focused on you.

"Birds."

He laughs, "Birds?! Specific kinds or all kinds?"

"All. They freak me out with how they fly around, can swoop at you any moment. The talking ones freak me out the most. Animals should not be able to talk back!"

Bucky looks at you in amusement, covering his mouth to muffle his laughter, "That wasn't an answer I was expecting."

"What kind of answer were you expecting then?"

"I don't know! Maybe spiders or heights?"

"Okay, what about you?"

"Reptiles."

"Like snakes?"

"Not just snakes, but also lizards. I don't like how they move. It freaks me out." He answers with seriousness.

You continue to converse with each other until your director yelled cut for time. You and Bucky visibly relax.

"Thank you again for coming on," you say with a genuine smile.

Bucky's eyes twinkle as he nods, "Of course, I mean, you were very persistent for this to happen."

"Well, not just me. The entire internet too. Are you ready for the storm that's about to hit once this airs?"

"I am. I mean, they're all right, we have great chemistry."

"I suppose we do."

"So...how about a real date?"

You can't help but widen your eyes in shock, "Oh, you were serious about that?"

He nods, "Absolutely. I really would like to get to know you better without all the cameras and crew."

"Yes, of course. I can take you to a cafe I know that actually does serve amazing matcha!"

He laughs, "Alright. It's a date!"

______________________________

Bucky Barnes Spotted With Interviewer, Y/N L/N

buckysnumber1fan: SHUT THE FUCK UP. HES FINALLY GOING ON COFFEE SHOP DATE

buckysluvr: FINALLYYYYYY. i love the chemistry they have!

thatoneguyonhere: miss girl is living my dream and im mad but also happy for her. ;__;

jbbhoe: wait, is this a real date or just for coffee shop date????

______________________________

"Well, well, well, look who we have here!" your friend and fellow interviewer, Carol.

You wave at her as you and Bucky approach, "Hi, Carol!" you give her a hug.

"How does it feel to be on the other side of this?" she asks, holding out her mic to you.

You snort, "So weird, but this guy finally convinced me to accompany him," you point to Bucky and he smiles at Carol.

"I told her she had to experience this at least once in her life. And much like her, I'm very persistent when it comes to something I want."

"This must be surreal for both of you considering that a few years ago at this very event, you two met and instantly clicked. Now look at you two!"

Bucky sighs, "Yeah, it's...it's a little funny how we've come to a weird kind of circle moment. We're both back here together, but our relationship with each other has completely changed. But I wouldn't have it any other way." He looks at you with fondness in his eyes and kisses your head.

Carol beams at the affection shared between you two, "Well alright, you two, I'll let you two go. Enjoy the rest of your night and, Bucky, congrats again on another nomination."

"Thanks so much!"

"See you around, Carol!" you wave to your friend as Bucky directs you further down the red carpet.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes imagine #marvel au #celebrity au

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gritandoengay · 2 months ago

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I only come on this app like once every two or three months to reblog fan art of whatever wlw ship I'm currently hyper fixating on and then dip. I'm Old TM by fandom standards and have spent way too much time in the trenches of fandom discourse to have the energy for that again, I've done my time. I'm not here to write a lengthy essay defending Caitlyn and/or CaitVi - no, I'm here simply to share an observation:

Many of you Caitlyn and CaitVi haters are super predictable.

Y'all have been regurgitating the same talking points since fucking 2014. Might not be the same people (god I hope it's not), but it's the same. thing. every. time. Doesn't matter the genre of the show or what happens between the characters, y'all will trot out the same reheated arguments.

"Caitlyn is a fascist dictator and you are a N*zi if you support her"

Is just reheated "Lexa is a fascist dictator" and "Catra is a fascist dictator" and "Edelgard is a fascist dictator." I would argue that Caitlyn is actually the least morally grey of that group, but anyway, it's "curious" how all these properties have equally (or even more) morally grey male characters that get rehabed by the fandom while the wlw are irredeemable fascists that only N*zis would like.

"CaitVi is a toxic relationship, Caitlyn is a domestic abuser that physically beats up Vi all the time and/or manipulates her"

None of these points are supported at all by the text imo, but anyway, it's the same language used to describe Clexa and Catradora and god knows how many other wlw ships in shows with popular non-wlw ships that have very similar dynamics. Even compared to other popular Arcane ships, this accusation is super hypocritical given how TimeBomb beat the shit out of each other in season 1 and Jayce literally blasts a hole in Viktor's chest for plot reasons. I would also like to point out that the super harmful stereotype of lesbians being domestic abusers was born out of wildly misinterpreted statistics of domestic abuse in real life.

"JayVik and/or Timebomb is actually more queer than CaitVi"

Is just badly reheated pasta made from the same ingredients as "Makorra is actually more queer than Korrasami" and "Bellarke is actually more queer than Clexa" and "Hordtrapta is actually more queer than Catradora" and "Dimileth is actually more queer than Edeleth" and "Huntlow is actually more queer than Lumity" , the arguments are always just as nonsensical because there's just flat out no such thing as a same sex ship being "less queer" than any other ship.

CaitVi literally fuck, on screen, in a sex scene that has literally won a god damn award and went on to become the most captured moment in all of godman Netflix. Regardless of your opinion on the ship, that visibility is important. The fact that a whole theater full of people started screaming as loudly as a jet engine with executives from Riot to hear it all is important.

The final scene of the show is literally them snuggling in front of the fire place and promising to always be together. That's gay as fuck. So, stop embarrassing yourself with this regurgitated "X canon wlw ship isn't as queer as -" nonsense, which btw, is just an extension of real life same sex relationships between women not being taken seriously because society overall still centers men in romance and can't fathom a romantic relationship not involving a man. Y'all know you can't even debate me on this in fandom spaces because all I have to do is point at the number of mlm and f/m fics on ao3 vs the crumbs that big fandoms give wlw ships.

Now on to the excuses and disclaimers that are trotted out.

"I can't be misogynistic I'm a woman-" Yes, yes you can. If you think that only conservative women can suffer from internalized misogyny, boy do I have years of working in leftist organizing spaces to dispel that notion. If you think that fandom spaces are somehow immune to misogyny- lol. Lmao. See the above point about mlm and f/m fics on ao3.

"I can't be lesbophobic/biphobic I'm literally queer -" Yes, yes you can. Both intersect with misogyny, and see the above point about misogyny. You can be a biphobic lesbian, you can be a lesbophobic bisexual, you can even be a biphobic bisexual and a lesbophobic lesbian. Wild, I know, thank the cis- heteropatriarchy.

"I can't be racist because I'm a POC -" Yes, yes you absolutely fucking can. I also have other news for you - despite how much some of you fuckers want to pretend Caitlyn isn't East Asian because of racist assumptions of what East Asians should look like and/or be depicted like in media, she is, and she's important rep, especially in a time when anti-East Asian (and Asian in general) bigotry has been rising in Western countries. No amount of "ACAB BLM Free Palestine" tags in your profile will make you immune from being racist. This leads me to a related point -

Y'all love to scream about wanting more rep with sapphic woc, but then when that rep comes, you tear it down or center other ships. Korrasami is toxic, CaitVi is toxic, Tanthamore is boring, Lumity is fine but I prefer Huntlow, etc.

Furthermore, the only, and I mean only time that black sapphic characters will be mentioned will be to prop them up as good rep vs whatever wlw you hate, but then when I go to those black sapphic character's/ship's Tumblr and ao3 tags, nothing! It's a ghost town! Those characters get paid dust by both wlw fandoms and the people using them as props to hate on other wlw characters! This is definitely a call out to wlw fandoms too btw, I have yet to see a ship with a black sapphic character explode in popularity, and that's on us too.

So, what is the purpose of this rant? Well, I know that most people that read it will dig in and further entrench themselves in their hatred of Caitlyn and CaitVi, but I'm hoping that at least one person genuinely re-examines that hatred and where it might be coming from. You don't have to like Caitlyn or CaitVi, you can criticize the ship and the characters. But if your criticisms and hatred are almost beat for beat the same accusations that have been thrown at wlw ships in even wildly different shows and contexts, and/or you excuse male characters and non-wlw ships with similar dynamics, then it's time to do some soul searching.

Anyway, this has already been long enough. I'm doing policy advocacy with local LGBTQ organizations and will go back to working on that. Whatever your opinions of Caitlyn and CaitVi are, there are fascists out there in the real world to fight.

#caitvi #caitlyn #vi #arcane #caitlyn kiramman #anti caitvi #anti caitlyn kiramman #arcane critical #arcane fandom critical

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tanenigiri · 6 months ago

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Like several others in the fandom, I'm still recovering from the feels that Chapter 25 of Hirano and Kagiura has given me, especially the scenes that paint Hirano in a rather green and purple light. As someone who only recently came to terms with being aro and acespec, seeing Hirano go through very familiar struggles felt like an out-of-body experience.

It also made me want to revisit some manga that I've read so far that have featured characters in the aro and ace spectrums. Since I mostly consume BL, there understandably haven't been a lot that's come into my radar, but the few I've read have all been great, and I wanted to take this opportunity to give them a shoutout.

I Want to Be a Wall by Honami Shirono - Definitely my favorite in this list and one of my top 5 fave manga overall, this stars an aroace woman and a gay man who get into a marriage of convenience. It deals with expectations from their families and society as a whole about what an ideal marriage should be, but it also spends a lot of time exploring how Yuriko comes to terms with her asexuality and how the people around her react to it, especially her husband Gakurouta - who also deals with his own issues about hiding his homosexuality and his very apparent attraction to another character in the series who's presented as straight. On top of dealing with all these issues very tastefully, it's a great slice-of-life manga with a lot of humor and fluff squeezed in, so if you want a feel-good read with depth and lots of soul, I really recommend this one.

Is Love the Answer? by Uta Isaki - The manga on this list that's most blatantly about aromanticism and asexuality, this explores the story of Chika and her journey to discovering, questioning, and accepting her romantic and sexual orientation. It goes very in-depth into this journey, and it even has multiple other aroacespec characters that she deems as role models, such as a professor who serves as a mentor for Chika and many other characters in the series as well as an older brother figure who had a much rougher time discovering his own asexuality. If you want to read a coming-of-age story where the lead comes to terms with her asexuality much in the same way that many BL and GL manga leads come to terms with their own queer identities, I highly recommend this manga. (Trigger warning for a brief sexual assault scene at the start - it's not graphic, but it definitely shows the attempt, so stray away if a scene like that would unsettle you.)

I Think Our Son Is Gay by Okura - I've talked about this manga before, and in my previous posts I mentioned that my favorite character is Yuri, the brother of the titular son Hiroki. Turns out I was onto something, as throughout the manga, Yuri mentions that while many girls in his school have expressed interest in him, he always turns them down, saying that he doesn't really get why everyone's making such a big deal about love. That already got my attention, but there's a scene in the fifth volume where Yuri actually goes into this more and researches why he's feeling that way, and it leads to a certain label we all know and love. Sadly that fifth volume is also the series's final one, so we don't get any more after that, but it really solidifies Yuri's journey throughout the manga, making for a nice parallel for his mother's own journey about accepting Hiroki's identity.

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare by Yuhki Kamatani - I've also talked about this manga before, and just like I Want To Be A Wall, it has pretty much cemented its place in my top 5 fave manga overall. What made me fall in love with this manga is how it explores so many types of queer stories in a very realistic light, dealing with issues like discrimination, family acceptance, and identity crises in a way that really shows how serious they can be. Expectedly, one of the types of queer stories it explores is about Someone who's aroace (whoever's read this manga - yes, that was a pun), though unlike the other characters in this series (and unlike most of the other characters in this post), that character is already at the point of their journey where they're comfortable with their sexual identity. Instead, the author uses Someone-san as a mentor throughout the story, helping other characters come to terms with their own identities and running the safe space that most of the story centers around. If you're looking for manga that's explicitly about the aroace experience, I don't think this would be the one for you, but if you're looking for great queer manga in general, this should be at the top of your list.

Bonus:

Cherry Magic by Yuu Toyota: I can't end this post without talking about queen Fujisaki. In the manga and anime, she takes on the role of a fujoshi who's a big fan of Kurosawa and Adachi's relationship even before they get together. But her role in the Japanese TV series (and movie) was changed, toning down the fangirlism (though hints of it are still there!) and instead giving her a unique storyline, one that eventually reveals to Adachi (though not explicitly) that she isn't interested in dating anyone. There isn't any explicit confirmation about her sexuality beyond this in the show, but there have been interviews from the showrunners where they do mention it. And honestly, as someone who was only starting out with BL at that point, seeing a character like her have that kind of background was already so incredible to me.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I hope you check these manga out, and if you know of other manga with great aroace rep, let me know!

#manga #manga rec list #lgbt manga #queer manga #aromanticism #asexuality #Hirano and Kagiura #Hirano to Kagiura #I Want to Be a Wall #Is Love the Answer?#I Think Our Son Is Gay #Our Dreams at Dusk #Shimanami Tasogare #Cherry Magic

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holoska · 21 days ago

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after debating for weeks whether to stay very far away from the deltarune soriel discourse or let myself ramble about my faves like I want to, the latter has finally won out

I've had time to properly absorb the weight of all that happens at the end of chapter 4, and obviously I do feel for both kris and susie. that is The Point of the scenes being from their perspectives; after everything they just went through and all the worry they had for toriel's safety (for the second time in 24 hours!), the scene they come home to is maybe the most uncomfortable slap in the face possible. it sticks out to me that the last thing susie talks about before the dark fountain is sealed is her wanting tomorrow to be the same as yesterday and for everything to always be able to go back to how it was, and that's what greets them - a blatant, obnoxious sign that things are changing. even though the scene has a lighthearted side, its overall tone adds to the downcast feeling the chapter ends on.

having said that, as someone who has spent the past 9 and a half years being normal about sans and toriel, I'm still very very happy that this is a canon scene we got 💜

the fandom may be largely not considering their perspectives in the slightest (or worse, only viewing their perspectives from the most bad faith angles possible), but I for one love this for them!! as other very good posts have pointed out, toriel has been sorely in need of someone who's there for her - an awful lot of people in town saw the divorce play out and have something to say about it, the holiday family are closer to asgore than toriel, kris is her child and stuck in the middle of their parents' issues, and while she's friends with alphys, them being coworkers and alphys being kris' teacher likely puts a distance of sorts between them. but sans is new in town, someone she immediately connects with, who has no pre-existing opinions about her family and has seen firsthand what toriel has to put up with from asgore. in every universe, sans is exactly the kind of person toriel needs in her life.

there's less to work with from sans' perspective given how little we know about him, and I'm not all-in on sans being from deltarune just yet (more specifically I do love the theory, I'm just giving myself room to not be too disappointed if it doesn't happen), but the new version of it's raining somewhere else being named 'the place where it rained' emotionally destroys me forever. either way it drives home just how happy toriel makes sans in both worlds and I love that so so much :']

to be clear I'm not saying they did nothing wrong, their choices negatively impacted kris and susie and they were objectively disruptive and inconsiderate after kris went to bed. but I like that they're being messy and flawed, because it means this isn't just "my faves are getting closer in the background yippee" but that their relationship is potentially an actual part of the story, and that's how you get The Good Stuff!! we wouldn't have had meaningful character moments like noelle finally standing up to queen if queen hadn't tried to control noelle and just listened to her from the start, or susie comforting ralsei with her bloodied hand if he'd told her and kris every detail of the full prophecy the moment he met them and never kept any secrets. if all the hints towards a flower shop dark world turn out to be true then it's pretty clear the story is building things up to make those future character moments hit, and considering we still don't know what happened with the dreemurr divorce at this point, chapter 5 seems like a perfect opportunity to dive into all of that.

plus, as sweet as susie's bond with toriel is, I honestly think susie seeing this side of toriel needed to happen. a lot of the fandom's complaints about toriel right now boil down to her not being the "perfect mother" they thought she was, and what bothers me about that is toriel was never meant to be that kind of character. toby has said that she's not the classic video game protagonist's mother who sees you off on your journey and you can come home and visit any time, and nothing changes and she never has any substantial character of her own. in undertale she literally handholds frisk through the tutorial, she becomes the first boss in her attempt to protect them when every other human left her care, and once they leave she won't let them come back or even call her phone because she can't face seeing them knowing they'll leave again and likely be killed. she's more than just the mother figure of the game, she's her own person with likes and dislikes, hobbies and flaws, and a past and trauma she can't overcome until the best ending.

we've only seen the tip of the iceberg of her history in deltarune, but that same principle holds true: she isn't the perfect parent you return to after each day's adventure, who gives you butterscotch pancakes every morning and never has any real part in the story because that isn't the intent behind her character. she mentioned her loneliness back in chapter 1, kris has secrets and problems they aren't letting her in on, asgore is being relentlessly inconsiderate of her boundaries, and for all susie's praise of toriel being a good mother, I think that house of cards was going to fall eventually. my hope is that, like her blowing up at ralsei ultimately bringing them closer, susie being able to see toriel as the imperfect adult she is but one who does genuinely care might help them build a stronger bond in the end too.

I think I always knew that if soriel ever inched closer to being canon there'd be discourse about it, and toriel slander is unfortunately nothing new. people are just being annoying about it currently and it sucks when I genuinely love what's being built up here!!

anyway crossing my fingers for a scene where toriel invites sans to the festival before she gets thrown in the bunker/he gets sent to undertale/the roaring happens/all of the above 🤞

#holoska rambles #holoska plays deltarune #deltarune spoilers #soriel #toriel #sans #the second half of this post might be a bit 'I've connected the two dots' 'you didn't connect anything' 'I've connected them'#but it'd make a lot of sense to me if susie losing some of her idolisation of toriel could be a commentary on undertale fans #who think that toriel is nothing more than their perfect goat mum. the exact thing her character is a parody of #and considering how much deltarune is playing off of expectations from undertale I don't think that's beyond the realm of possibility #...likewise I could also be totally wrong about where chapter 5 will go ghdsjfdgh I just think that'd be a neat direction to take #anyway. fun fact before I started chapter 4 I was hoping we might get to see sans and toriel casually interact like in chapter 2 #and maybe just maybe toriel would offer to show sans around the festival since it's all new to him #and then I wrote that off as wishful thinking. too unlikely to happen for real #suffice to say what we actually got hit me like a bus and I am thanking the driver (toby) for it

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 4 months ago

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Hi, what do you think Silver and Malleus’s relationship is with each other? I’ve seen so many people say that they’re like brothers but what do you think?

Oooh, this is something I see a lot in the fandom! There's a tendency for fans to refer to Diasomnia as a "found family", typically with Lilia as the father figure and the other three members as his children. Lilia even refers to the dorm as a family in Cater’s Halloween Dress vignettes, even if they are not related by blood. There's been more of an emphasis on Malleus and Silver being Lilia's sons (and therefore brothers with each other) as of late due to how book 7 strongly presents Lilia as a guardian, mentor, and overall important figure in Malleus's life. Silver is someone we already knew previously as Lilia's adopted son, so his status has not changed much, excluding him formally adopting the Vanrouge surname at the end of book 7. There is also a radio broadcast (Twisted Radio Station #30) in which the VAs for Malleus, Lilia, and Silver referred to the characters as a father and two brothers, so I suspect this also influenced the discussion of their dynamics.

Now, I want to be clear: it's perfectly fine if you see Malleus and Silver as brothers! Framed this way, it heightens the drama of their big battle, and sweetens the way they come together and make amends at the very end. However, I do not personally view their relationship in this way.

Firstly, I cannot recall many scenes--if any--in which Malleus and Silver act like one might traditionally think of as "brothers". They don't really pal around with each other or spend a ton of leisure time together. In this sense, Sebek (via the time spent training) feels more like a brother to Silver than Malleus ever is (though personally the two feel more like childhood friends to me). Silver also tends to speak to Malleus in a formal way (ie using honorifics like “Malleus-sama” or titles like “sir”) rather than simply Malleus's name alone, which denotes a sort of distance, rather than familiarity. Likewise, Malleus reciprocates that energy. Because of that, Silver and Malleus seem to have more of a relationship defined by professional boundaries to me.

Now, there's definitely the voice line here or there where Malleus says he goes to X or does Y with Silver there, but most of the time it's Silver with Sebek or Malleus will indicate it's because they're his guards and it's their job to do so. One could also say that Malleus cares for Silver's feelings, as it is Silver confiding in him about his insecurities as a frail human yet to pay Lilia back that triggers Malleus's... Big Oopsie. However, Malleus is not reacting to Silver's tears in the way that a brother does to their sibling being upset; he instead expresses his disappointment with himself. "There's something my Grandmother has often talked to me about. It's the reason why our family, with our draconic lineage, is so exceptionally powerful even among the nocturnal fae. She said it's to ensure that nothing ever diminishes the happiness of our people in Briar Valley. Yet here I am, incapable of dispelling the sorrows of father and son alike. What good does all this magic do me? ...I'm completely powerless." "Our people". Malleus is using this phrase to delineate himself as the ruler and Silver, Lilia, etc. as his subjects. He's not placing them all on equal ground as family, but rather himself as the one above them and responsible for their happiness. This just further adds to my own perception that he and Silver aren't really brothers; neither of them act like they are, and the narrative doesn't do much to nudge me in the direction of thinking that they are? I mean, there's Lilia acting as the guardian to both of them--but it's possible for someone to parent two children (in this case, not blood-related to the other at all) and for those two children to not really have a "brotherly" bond. That's not to say that Silver and Malleus don't care for each other--they most certainly do. The Diasomnia found family is still valid despite this. I just... don't get the sense that they see each other as sctual brothers. And again, it's fine if you interpret their relationship as being brotherly! Everyone's going to see this a bit differently; I'm by no means saying that my opinion is the "correct" one.

#disney twst #disney twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland #Diasomnia #Malleus Draconia #Silver #Lilia Vanrouge #Sebek Zigvolt #notes from the writing raven #question #book 7 spoilers #book 7 chapter 13 part 2 spoilers #jp spoilers #Silver Vanrouge #Cater halloween dress vignette spoilers

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danadiadea · 2 months ago

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This initially was a post talking about the "Snape followed Marauders around!" take, but grew into a meta on why Severus didn’t have a "theory" that Remus was a werewolf before the Prank, and how the Prank could've possibly gone overall.

The idea that Severus was spying on Marauders is inherently funny to me, because they had a Map that geolocated him. How would he be able to "spy" on people who always saw where he was? They also had an Invisibility Cloak, which basically makes a perfect kit both to spy on people, and to prevent others from spying on you.

In a train scene (admittedly that's not very indicative, since it's their first interaction with not yet established dynamics; still, it's James who listens to snily conversation and struts in, when Severus leaves the conflict as soon as Lily tells him to) and during SWM (much better example: we see that Severus is deeply immersed in his studies and doesn't see a thing around – at least that's Harry’s impression, while Sirius stares at him during OWLs by his own admission, and reacts to him like a dog to the rabbit; James notices Severus the moment he stands up from the bushes he read in, and decides to harass him for fun), it's James and Sirius who pay extra attention to Snape, and not otherwise.

"But he figured out that Remus was a werewolf!". Did he?

This scene takes place a few days after Severus almost got killed by a werewolf – the Prank had happened "the other night". The fandom widely believes Severus had known about Remus being a werewolf and still went to the Shack, which is based solely on Lily's words about "his theory". But he PRESENTS the arguments to Lily basically from scratch! "There is something weird about this Lupin, where does he keep going", really? Yes, she "knows his theory" – and he could tell her about it yesterday or even today in the morning! I am not into "genius Lily" interpretation, but I also don't think she was exceptionally unintelligent, and dismissing Severus' reasonable arguments with changing the topic is not how one would react to something they had been considering for a long time. Lily brushes away what Severus says – he isn't able to convince her.

Not to mention that she doesn't connect Severus sneaking to the Shrieking Shack, and Potter of all people "saving" him, with the werewolf Remus theory (even tho she most likely was aware of the lunar phase, since she'd study Astromony and possibly Divination)!! She says "whatever's down there" about what Severus could encounter in the Shack. Therefore Severus obviously didn't tell her about Remus spending full moons there even as an assumption, much less as something he had seen happening, before he was silenced and couldn’t share it! Could he have theories he didn't share with her? Sure. But the only reason the fandom assumes he knew about werewolf Remus are Lily's words about "his theory" in the first place. Lily is either dumber than Goyle, or she had heard "werewolf Remus" theory vaguely, not long ago, and without any connection to the Shack. Lily says Severus is obsessed with the Marauders – well, they bully him, and a few days ago literally tried to kill him! And he hints on that to his best friend howewer he can in his situation!

But wouldn't Severus notice signs of Remus being a werewolf? Well, no-one else does, so why should he? Yet again, Lily, who literally lives with Remus, is completely unaware. Supposedly so are all the other students except Marauders. If the Gryffindors didn't connect Remus' secret with lycanthropy, then why Severus, who was a Slytherin, would? Seeing how much Lily resists the idea that the Remus could be a werewolf, I think it's just a pretty unimaginable scenario for them. Even when the thought crosses their mind, they brush it off.

All Snape "following" the Marauders ideas comes from this part in PoA:

"He has his reasons … you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly killed him, a trick which involved me –’

Let's start with Sirius and Remus being people who give this information, which already is an indicator. We know that Remus' "Quidditch-centric" explanation of the victim resenting their abuser is bullshit. He also lies about animagi James "risking his life" while pulling Snape out of the Shack. So the first question is how much we can trust what those two fuckers, both prejudiced to Snape and whitewashing their own shitty behaviour, have to say.

Sirius implies it would "serve Snape right" to be killed because he was "sneaking around, trying to find out what we were up to". A strong suggestion as for one of the stalkering Map creators. But also "sneaking around" and "trying to find out" doesn't even necessarily imply "following"!

To sneak around means 1. To move around (some place) in a quiet, sneaky, inconspicuous, or furtive manner.

2. To move past or attempt to move past someone or something in a sneaky, furtive manner so as not to be noticed.

This is exactly what Severus does during SWM. Harry mentions four whole times that Severus looks at his papers attentively, is sitting in the dense bushes, slouches. He isn't "spying" on anyone. He makes himself less noticeable. And honestly, that kind of sneaking around seems way more plausible to me than a bullying victim somehow spying on the bullies who have invisibility and a GPS locator. Would Sirius dehumanise this behaviour? Well, I don't think Sirius who saw Snape as his prey needed a valid reason to dehumanise Severus, frankly.

Would Severus try to get the Marauders expelled, or spy on them occasionally? Most likely yes, but the success of his spying is more than questionable – and wanting your bullies out of the school (especially since Severus was right and they did illegal, dangerous things, that deserved way more than exclusion) is very reasonable. Especially since we know that typical school punishments weren't able to stop them, and they kept being bullies. Trying to report more serious behaviour to school authorities is you suspect they engage in it is a logical step. And "trying to get us expelled" can apply even to Snape reporting the things Marauders publically and openly did to adults. We know they weren't above using illegal hexes, after all.

"Severus was very interested in where I went every month" is just Lupin's assumption, since Severus wouldn't share that with Remus – and we know how Lupin's unbased assumptions on Snape usually are. The time frame of this "interest" isn't even specified, nor are the reasons (see my previous point).

Next, Remus says Severus saw Pomfrey leading him to the Shack. How am I supposed to imagine that?

1 )The Marauders (Sirius) spied on him, when he was hanging around and spying on Remus, through the Map. If Severus was spying, he wouldn't need Sirius' "help" – he'd see how Poppy opens the Shack with pressing the knot himself. Severus didn’t, therefore we can conclude he didn't even see Remus entering, which is again, questionable efficiency (or maybe he saw it and didn't plan to go after Remus, but then something in Sirius' behaviour rather than the information about the Willow changed his mind).

Severus could go to the Shack the next full moon, with Sirius telling Snape about the Willow during the month; or that very same night, which I think is plausible, since Sirius is impulsive. If that's the case, Severus wouldn't even have the time to process new information – and he wouldn't have enough data to conclude Remus is a werewolf. It also tracks with Lily, Severus' best friend, being completely unaware of Remus being connected with the Shack.

(As an aside, I think Sirius either discussed how to enter the Shack loudly with someone (like Peter, who is suspiciously the only Marauder never mentioned in relation to the Prank), knowing with the help of the Map that Snape was listening, to "punish" him for sneaking around; or goaded Severus, saying that he himself had entered the Shack, but Severus would be too much of a coward to try it. Because I don't think that Remus would refer to Sirius just directly telling Snape about the Willow as a "trick" and say Snape would "of course" try it; nor do I think Severus would call it an "amusing joke". Also, Remus saying "of course Snape tried it" implies he himself didn't think Severus had known he was a werewolf)

2) Snape accidentally saw Poppy and Remus crossing the Hogwarts grounds. Whether Severus connected it to the Shack, or to Remus' "secret", we can't know. Those would've been his private thoughts, Remus and Sirius could only make assumptions. I kinda think that the wording "had seen me crossing the ground" is implying noticing rather than spying, but that, like all the information on the topic, is vague enough.

3) Remus is just pulling things out of his ass like he does sometimes, and makes theories based on nothing. It also would make sence, since Snape went to the Shack to get the Marauders expelled (at least that's the only explanation I can think of, unless Sirius told him something specific about what's inside and not just how to enter the Shack), and he'd know school authorities allow whatever Remus does, if he saw him with Poppy. We don't know what information he had, so there is space for speculations. Maybe he thought the other Marauders did something not allowed in there (he was correct then, btw).

TL;DR: Snape most likely didn't have a theory that Remus was a werewolf before the Prank – at least nothing in the books points towards it, whatever little spying he could do on the Marauders with them having the stalking Map and the invisibility Cloak was reasonable in his situation, and all the "Snape spied on the Marauders" information is vague and comes from biased sourses, unlike the dynamics we see in Snape's (objective and only possibly biased with Harry's narration, just reminding) memories.

#severus snape #pro severus snape #severus snape meta #lily evans #pro snape #harry potter #anti marauders #anti marauders fandom #snape meta #young snape #marauders meta

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utilitycaster · 1 month ago

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I am treading quite carefully here for reasons that will be immediately apparent, but: I am well aware I have a lot of followers within the CR fandom. I am also aware that mutuals with a fraction of that following have been called "BNFs" for simply making occasional popular posts with a cohesive argument. (I wouldn't be surprised if non-mutuals have as well; I just haven't talked to them)

I can also say, with a fairly high degree of confidence, that most people who have gotten the "evil BNF" moniker dating back to Campaign 2 era (when it was more frequently for liking the canon ships and end of the story) and especially people who have been called that for not liking Campaign 3 are pretty much all women; unsurprising given that the Tumblr population skews heavily towards women and nb people. It's also increasingly, in recent months, come with accusations of being either too confident (the "stating ones opinion as objective fact" complaint) or too emotional, even to the point of pathologizing and concern trolling. And especially in the past couple of months, the posts that compare and contrast other works to Campaign 3 have been on the whole calm and measured; one would be hard-pressed to call them emotional at all let alone a cause for worry or a sign of unwellness.

While I can't say for certain this is coming from a place of misogyny, at least not consciously, I can say that as a woman in a male-dominated field in real life it follows extremely familiar patterns: if you're too calm and confident, you're coming on too strong and need to tone it down, but then when you tone it down, you're too emotional and crazy and not smart enough. It has also not escaped me that several of the people making these claims about women - and most recently about a nonwhite woman - have been white men. Which is also a familiar pattern.

I do not, in fact, expect nor demand a fandom where everyone agrees with me, and I think one can look at fandom trends and see that no one controls overall opinion, so I think my advice here is to internalize and accept that and decide if you're okay with being in a fandom where people might be saying things you don't like for a very long time. It's fine if you're not; it's obviously not misogynistic to merely disagree with people who happen to be women; but it's your responsibility to either curate a space within that or find a new one if said disagreement is upsetting you or leading you to make these accusations, and I'd appreciate it if, now that I've brought it to your attention, you cut the misogyny, for which I'll grant benefit of the doubt that it was, until now, unintentional.

#cr tag #look i know that popularity can be abused obviously #but like. kinda feels like people are trying to claim oppression on the basis of fewer followers on social media #when 1. might not even be true and 2. you being a man and me being a woman is a much more real form of privilege

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starcurtain · 2 months ago

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Is it just me wishing the sunday - aventiorine voice lines carried more hostility? Like if someone took me/my partner on a deadly acid trip I would not be so "forgive and forget"about it, and Aventurine especially is way way less benevolent than me lol

This ask has been in the inbox forever, I'm so sorryyyy T_T

I can definitely see why people were annoyed by the voice lines being pretty easygoing between everyone from the Penacony cast and Sunday, but I think that's less a product of "Aventurine already forgave Sunday" and more a meta decision: Voice lines don't (usually) change over time, so if they gave Aventurine and Ratio really nasty voice lines towards Sunday, it might come across as a bit odd for them to later team up with the Astral Express (including Sunday) without issue. The lines we have in-game probably represent the fact that the devs knew in advance that Sunday's allegiances would be changing and that he'd become a "good guy," so the voice lines needed to be soft enough to justify accepting him in the future.

I also think there's somewhat of a bent in the fandom to see Aventurine as a vengeful person (a lot of people still seem to be convinced that he hates the IPC and is going to betray them, for example), but we're not really given much confirmation in-game that he is that vengeful in the first place.

In his flashbacks as a kid, he mentions hating the Katicans and not understanding why they would target the Avgins, but he hasn't ever made any efforts to directly "pay them back" for what they did, nor have we ever heard him saying that the Katicans should face genocide or karmic retribution for their actions.

While he was a slave, he clearly despised the slave owner, but instead of being overtly aggressive and fighting for his freedom, he attempts to bargain his way up the ladder by going along with his master's wish for wealth--if the slave master had actually given Aventurine the 30 tanbas, I think that Aventurine would probably not have killed him; he would likely have made his master filthy rich, all while working himself into a position of freedom using the "I'm your partner in business, right? You need me!" angle until he could finally pull the rug out from under the master entirely and walk away a wealthy, free man. At the very least, it's implied that Aventurine murdered his master largely because he was pushed so far beyond what a human being could tolerate, rather than Aventurine just being particularly murderous by nature.

Even with the IPC, although Aventurine has agreed to do... something... with Boothill, we're never given any indication that Aventurine applies the logic "The IPC were the ones responsible for what happened to the Avgins" to all of the IPC. He may not be best friends with all of his colleagues in the Stonehearts, but he clearly gets along well with Topaz and Jade and doesn't seem to have any issues pursuing the IPC's missions overall--we never hear him struggle with the idea of taking back Penacony for the IPC, for example. He does not remotely seem to care about the Penaconians' freedoms being taken away lol.

I could easily be proven wrong in the future, but at least as far as we've currently been shown, my perception is that Aventurine is an extremely pragmatic person, to the point that he might see holding grudges as a detriment to himself.

The phrase that comes to mind is: "Today's enemies might be tomorrow's allies."

If you choose to hold on to animosity, you might miss an opportunity to use someone else to your advantage--and therefore you might lose the opportunity to get ahead of others entirely.

Aventurine strikes me as a character whose actions center ferociously on his own survival, his definition of accomplishment, and his own ability to "come out on top"--even if he wants to use his achievements to help his people and repay those who aided him, he needs to first experience success to be able to help others. Aventurine is extremely shrewd, extremely observant, and extremely cunning--a single glance is all it takes for him to figure out how to use the world, the tools, and the people around him to achieve his goals.

Personally, I would imagine he's quite willing to cozy up to people who've wronged him in the past--so long as they might still prove beneficial to him in the future.

Why not let bygones be bygones, friend~?

#honkai star rail #aventurine #star answers

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taomyou · 15 days ago

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digimon fan!nerdjo headcanons (crest edition)

i assigned gojo the crest of light in nerds do it better and i want to explain my reasoning for that since i think it's a neat detail. let me know if you have any other questions or curiosities about the digimon related details i put in that fic, and i'll make another one of these posts ദ്ദി(｡•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊ mild digimon adventure 01 spoilers. mild angst but overall very happy and feel-good. also thanks for 100 followers :P background info: a crest is a symbol, and in the digimon anime, the main characters (referred to as "the digidestined") are given necklaces with a crest that correspond to their most prominent trait (ex: courage, love, friendship, etc). the crest will light up once the trait is fully realized, and their digimon partner will digivolve to ultimate level. the crests in the anime have specific colors (sincerity, light, knowledge, etc), but a lot of people nowadays custom order them to fit their own preferences. it's also fairly common practice in the digimon fandom to assign yourself a crest read nerds do it better here and other digimon fan!nerdjo headcanons here

digimon fan!nerdjo who watched Digimon Adventure 01 and 02 because they had DVDs of it at the local library near his childhood home. he'd go on to watch the other seasons, of course, but Adventure holds a special place in his heart as the first piece of media he ever really connected with as a young boy. the feelings of grief, loss, heartbreak, and found family he felt when he watched it for the first time stay with him, even though he was barely 8 and couldn't really process what was happening

digimon fan!nerdjo whose favorite Digimon Adventure character as a child was tai. i mean, he's the main character, why wouldn't gojo think he's the coolest of the original digidestined? gojo got an agumon plushie for christmas the same year he started renting out the DVDs from the library, too, so it makes sense that gojo favored that duo over the others. sure, gojo still liked all the other characters, but, as a kid, he also really looked up to tai. gojo was never really all that outgoing growing up, always stuck at tutoring or the activities his parents forced him into, so it was easy to admire a character whose primary trait was courage. gojo could hardly stand up for himself to his coaches and tutors, nevermind his own family, so he dreamt of, one day, receiving the crest of courage and finally having the willpower to do what he actually wanted to

digimon fan!nerdjo who, honestly, just didn't really like the color orange, so he never bought the necklace associated with the crest he wanted. he still wanted to think courage would be the crest he'd have, even if it didn't feel like it fit him at all, but he's not going to wear an orange necklace if he doesn't have to

satoru gojo who didn't have time to indulge in digimon anymore. he'd spent so much time watching the series, playing the games, collecting trinkets as a kid, but his parents decided it was time for him to finally grow out of it before he started middle school. it didn't bother him that much—he knew it was a kid's show—but part of him still wished he was allowed to keep it close to him. turns out, the crest of courage never really was meant for him. he still kept all the goggles he wore in his room, his agumon plushie is still at his pillow every night, and he sometimes doodles calumon's Zero Unit when he's bored in class, but digimon becomes a childhood memory that he can't afford to hold onto anymore when he has more responsibilities

satoru gojo who, between the summer of his first and second year of high school, passed by that old library again after grabbing a quick bite to eat with his friends, and came inside to see whether or not the Adventure DVDs were still there. just for nostalgia's sake, really. he didn't expect to run into the library technician from when he was in primary school to be there

"oh, gojo! it's been a while since we've seen you around, the staff all miss you dearly! what're you up to these days? are you still into those digimon things?"

gojo blinks at her, surprised that she even remembers him after so many years. granted, he'd sit at the tables in their children's area after school and color in Digimon coloring pages the librarians would print out for him when he had nowhere else to be and nobody to watch him (which was... pretty often, actually), but he didn't think anyone would notice he'd been gone

"just school, after-school clubs, spending time with my friends," he smiles nervously. "and, uh, not really." it's a strange feeling: being brought back to the past

satoru gojo who, despite his answer, gets pulled to a section of the library where the DVDs are kept and is shown all the new digimon DVDs on the shelves. all the seasons of the anime, the movies, there's even a few game discs tucked in-between them. the library tech tells him that they'd been slowly building the collection because some of the other children that came around became curious about the Digimon coloring pages that were hung up in the study area, but that gojo never came back around by the time it was actually being put together

satoru gojo who leaves the library with the same Adventure DVDs he loaned out when he was a kid, and sneaks them into his room so his parents don't ask why he's so jittery. he puts them into the DVD player, and he sits crisscross applesauce on the floor as the TV lights up and the menu screen appears, the nostalgic beeps and techno sounds filling the dark

satoru gojo who bawls his eyes out for the rest of the night, feeling all those feelings he'd felt the first time he watched this when he was a young boy. sure, the writing is clunky at times, some of the characters make awful decisions that make him want to break the television screen, and the Digi-Rap is much cornier than he remembered it being, but the story has all the heart he remembers it having and even more. he couldn't properly appreciate everything it had to offer when he was a child, but now that he's older and seen a tiny bit more of the world, he sees the show for what it is. his glasses are long abandoned, too much of an inconvenience when he has to company wipe away his tears with his blankets

satoru gojo whose eyes have already run out of tears to cry by episode 37 of season 1, "Wizardmon's Gift." instead, he has to turn off the TV and sit in the darkness of his room to reflect. he's watched wizardmon die before, but he only now fully understands how much it meant for kari to activate her crest, digivolve gatomon into angewomon, and finally kill her abuser. he thinks about kari, how she never gave up, even when gatomon resisted their partnership and would run away all the time. he eventually gets up from the floor and turns the TV back on to finish the rest of the season, occasionally having to switch in DVDs as the episodes go on, but it stays with him that the crest of light resonates with him deeply, even if he can't quite pinpoint why

satoru gojo who spends the rest of his summer replaying what he watched as a kid, watching what's come out since, and catching up on everything he's missed. it's a lot to get through, but considering this summer is the only free time he's going to have, he figures he might as well make the most of it. he hides it as best he can, biting his tongue when he sees something out in public that reminds him of a moment in the anime or when he wants to make a reference to a game, but there's moments he slips up and mentions staying up late to beat a final boss or catches himself smiling at random alleyways that remind him of backgrounds in the anime. nobody seems to really care, which confuses him, but he still keeps it to himself

satoru gojo who hesitates at his desk, looking at the ordering site. he'd found the link on a fandom forum page, and it's going to be his final goodbye to the Digital World. not like anyone would be able to even identify the necklace as Digimon-related, anyway, so it wouldn't be any issue if he were to order one for himself. he has no idea what crest to choose now, though

satoru gojo who knows already that some of them are absolutely not befitting of him. the crest of love when he isn't even sure he's ever loved anything at all, the crest of friendship when he's only just started making real friends when he'd started high school and met suguru and shoko, the crest of knowledge when he's barely interested in anything in school apart from physics. he thinks harder on it; what crest could possibly fit him? it's his one shot at keeping the Digital World close to him, so he's gotta get it right this time

satoru gojo who takes an online quiz to try and figure it out that way. there's hundreds of them around, one of them's gotta be right. on his first try, he gets assigned courage, then sincerity, then knowledge, then courage again. it really isn't any help to his dilemma. it's partially his fault, he thinks, because he's probably not honest enough with himself to do these quizzes properly and actually get results that fit him, but whatever. he gets frustrated after another hour or three later when he still can't come to any realizations about it, so he clicks back to the ordering site

satoru gojo who just orders the crest of light in the color blue. he figures, if he can't figure out what crest actually fits him, he'll go with the one with his favorite design. he enjoyed kari's arc in the show the most anyway in his most recent rewatch, so he doesn't mind that his heart isn't entirely in it (yet)

satoru gojo who gets his crest necklace in the mail a few weeks later. his friends are over at his house, lounging around and eating snacks before they need to head out for karaoke. he opens the package in front of them, forgetting what it was, and they're all decently confused when they sit around him and he's pulling out the necklace tag. gojo's praying and praying that none of them can recognize it, and, thankfully none of them say anything. he rushes to his room to put it away in his desk drawer, and the group of them are out the door and off to go meet with the others at the private room they had booked

satoru gojo who comes home and tries on the necklace before going to bed. it feels weird on him, strangely warm against his always-cold body, but he figures it's just his throat killing him from going too hard on his solo song. can't even be mad about it, he knows he was born to sing "Clarity" at the top of his lungs. if not that, then the pain is from him, Shoko, Nanami, and Haibara going at it on "Heart Attack." he goes to lay down with the necklace still on, fiddling with the tag as he tries to find sleep, and he finds it quickly enough

satoru gojo who starts wearing the necklace underneath all his clothes, only ever taking it off to shower. it becomes a good luck charm at some point: a good maths test score here, a win for his favorite basketball team there, a snowy day when he needs an excuse to not go to a family dinner party. sometimes the tag will pop out over his clothes and someone will ask what necklace he's wearing, but he just waves them off and tells them it's just because it matches his eyes

satoru gojo who feels like an imposter wearing it. he hardly even understands what the crest of light even means, so why's it become so engrained in the way he regards himself? he does little things here and there to try and understand it better: goes out of his way to rewatch the relevant episodes through clips on youtube, reflects on what parts of the crestholder's arc feel relatable to him, tries to be... lighter on himself

satoru gojo who swears nothing's changed—he still pays close attention in his studies, he still loiters in convenience store parking lots with his friends after-school, he still attends robotics even though he's sure their bot isn't winning any damn awards this season—but people around him start noticing something

satoru gojo looks... happier

satoru gojo who unknowingly willed himself to realize the crest of light in his own right. his light, now found in-between the pages of his search for the meaning of some unspoken part of his character, rubs off on those around him. he drags shoko with him when she mentions needing someone to go look at backpack accessories with, he offers to drive them to the nearby tea shop suguru likes when he notices that his friend needs a pick-me-up, he lends nanami the chemistry notes from when he missed class for his family's trip to malaysia at the beginning of spring (...he also slides him a copy of the answers for the stoichiometry quiz nanami missed and had to retake; neither of them ever bring it up again, but nanami buys him a carton of strawberry milk later that week as his own thank you)

satoru gojo who gets asked by haibara what his necklace means at a pool party during the summer before his third year of high school. the two of them are lounging at the pool chairs, relishing in their victory in the group's three-way chicken fight while the others are duking it out for second place. and maybe it's because haibara is so easy to talk to or because the weather is great that day and he thinks his words will disappear in the wind (or maybe he's finally come to terms with the fact it means so much to him now), but he tells him. just about unloads a lifetime's worth of Digimon lore, story beats, digivolution mechanics. haibara listens as he takes bites from his watermelon slice, nodding enthusiastically as gojo rambles even though he's got no idea what's really going on

satoru gojo who decides, from that point on, that the crest of light does, indeed, suit him perfectly, and that there's no point in hiding his fascination with the franchise anymore. his parents disapprove, telling him that he needs to focus his attention on other things, but there's only so much they can lecture him for when his grades remain as stellar as they've always been. they're not really around often enough, anyway, so gojo doesn't really care about what they have to say about it anymore

satoru gojo who is loud about his rediscovered obsession. he plasters stickers all over his car, his friends know to each pitch in ¥50 so he can grab a DTCG booster pack on their walks home after school at the comic book store, and he assigns them all their own crests and gets them the corresponding necklaces in their favorite colors that christmas (which they all keep safe in its original packaging and on their nightstands, not that gojo needs to know that). they wear the necklaces whenever they think gojo needs something to cheer him up, though, or whenever he has a class presentation because they know he'll look for them in the crowd. at his graduation, they all even took pictures together at the front gate with their crests glowing under the afternoon sun, and gojo swore he'd never cried happy tears like that before

digimon fan!nerdjo who hums when, years later and on a walk to his car after a study/DTCG session at the library, you ask why he wears the crest of light. the two of you have been friends for months now, meeting up on campus to study together, play DTCG, and try as many desserts in your little college town as possible, but the topic of your crest assignments never came up before. gojo smiles wistfully, reaching up to tug at his crest tag, and he looks over at you, your crest of sincerity tag glowing under the sunset rays

digimon fan!nerdjo who's glad that, after so many years of feeling misunderstood, he has someone who he knows will listen to him in earnest about his interests and can really understand him. as soon as he opens his mouth to answer, you're right there with him, hanging off his every word and asking questions that he knows how to answer from his heart, and he feels his crest glowing

anyways go read nerds do it better

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo x reader #gojo x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #nerd gojo #nerdjo #jjk x you

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hockeyspiral23 · 2 months ago

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Things I've Learned Over My First Year As an Author on AO3

(in the Empyrean fandom)

The things you write that you love will rarely be the things other people love. But, if you're lucky, you'll find a small group of fervent supporters who will love and enjoy said things just as fiercely as you do.

The closer to canon it is, the more people will likely enjoy it ... especially if it deals with canon ships. Generally.

More exposure isn't always better. You might think it might be nice to have something blow up and get to a large size (... well, relatively speaking within the fandom), but it's also terrible, because of the increased levels of criticism, expectation, and how it will color anything you write moving forward. Yes, I'm speaking of the truth in our scars. Yes, I'm happy it got the notice it did, but I also regret it. I'm wavering on whether I truly want to write the sequel or not (despite having jotted down bits and pieces) ... especially because I genuinely loved the remix, felt it was the improved version ... and it got a fraction of the attention and the same - if not more - criticism. I also feel so much pressure to seriously deviate from canon and write an entirely new story … and that was never my intention with the first one. Truthfully, I almost wish ttios hadn't gotten big for how much it ended up fucking with my mental health. And I will 100% say that it is probably a me thing.

The community is both wonderful and terrible. I'm incredibly grateful for the community and have met some wonderful people, but certain spaces are incredibly cliquey. I do not think they intend to be, but it certainly feels like it. And I know I'm not the only one to feel that way.

(and we already know how much I feel on the periphery of things - and I will say that that was written specifically regarding a portion of the community.)

~*~

I've published 500,444 words in one year. I have a few other projects marginally started and one or two about half-finished. But right now, I don't really feel like finishing them and publishing them. Quite honestly, I'm disheartened and have been questioning on whether I want to keep writing for a little while. I've barely written shit over the past few weeks. Had I not already had a good chunk of ttios: fate's remix written by the time I was finished posting the truth in our scars, I may not have posted much of anything else.

If you enjoy your writers, tell them. Be kind to them. Interact with them. Even if they seem weird, or awkward, or a little off. Even if they're not at the popular kids table. Because honestly? The lack of interaction has made me less likely to interact with a lot of fics as well, despite me knowing how much authors appreciate it. But it's really made me less inclined to interact in the fandom overall.

Before you share constructive criticism, even if you don't mean it to come across as condescending or hurtful, sometimes it'll still be interpreted that way. So please be careful with your phrasing. Or find a way to say it privately.

Related: seriously, don't read several thousand (literally hundreds of thousands) of words by someone, seemingly enjoy them ... but have your first ever comment on their works be words of criticism - even if they're sandwiched in (half-assed) compliments. This might be the fucked up brain talking, but for me? I'd rather you have not complimented me at all because it feels like you're only doing it because you want your criticisms to go down easier. If you'd been commenting all along, I'd probably take your shit less hard and actually constructively like you were hoping. (I will also admit that they probably would have gone better had I already not been in such a shitty fucking place regarding the story in general.)

The above two things were basically why I felt like I had to justify every single fucking thing I did in ttios: fate's remix by the end ... and as a writer, I don't believe I should have to justify every single fucking word I write. If the story isn't what you want it to be, CLICK THE FUCK OUT OF IT. And do it quietly. I do it all the time. Unless it's specifically requested, I'm not going to tell someone why I'm not reading their work anymore. Not everyone is going to like everything. I understand that. But it's something I fucking know - you don't need to tell me that you think it's shitty and that I'm disappointing you.

(do you email/comment on actual author's posts similar things when you don't like their books? or the book doesn't go as planned? if so, never read anything where the author has already died because they'll never get to read your opinion.)

IN ANY CASE ...

Maybe (hopefully) you'll see me soon. Maybe you won't.

But thank you for a hell of a year.

#ao3 #archive of our own #fanfic author #t's rants?#i've been so grateful to get back into writing but did it really have to come with the mental health hit too?#it's me so i guess i shouldn't be surprised that it did #but i have sewing projects to do so maybe it's good that i'm taking a writing break #have something else consume my life

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rat-n-atty · 5 months ago

Text

The last gift 🎁

Animation and some soppy rambling from yours truly!

( featuring in order, @stillnothereforanyrealreason @hyperbaguette @chaosisunderratedd @fandomgoesahhhhhhhhh @echostarsys @livzees (Hi wife!) @sakuwura-meow-meow @xcoffeebomb @cookiepopcat @axelcx11z @coralalala64 @tiredsmashbros @its-a-me-mango @libbytwq @bear-boi-5 @bluestrawberrybunny @briandraws )

BOOM!

REDESIGNS ONCE AGAIN ONLY THIS TIME ATTY APPARENTLY HAS LOST HER WRISTS (jk, but now her hands float for some reason, not Rats tho...)

Okay now it's time for me to rant about all the wonderful people I have made in the animation :D

@stillnothereforanyrealreason , @hyperbaguette and @chaosisunderratedd y'all are...the best friends I had ever got the chance of meeting. We have been through the deepest shit ever in our life and yet we all still managed to still be friends and that really surprises me. You guys are my truest friends that I don't mind rambling about redeemable villains with or maybe even share some shitty humor or go to y'all for some art inspiration but overall just have a really fun time.

I want to thank you for all these crazy 2 years we have been friends for and hopefully we still continue that crazy questionable bond 💜💜💜

@fandomgoesahhhhhhhhh and @echostarsys y'all are a bunch of freaks tbh /silly but you're bestest mates that I could ever ask for! I love hanging out with you guys and yapping about who knows what whether it be Smg4 or it be your Aus! I love how passionate you two are and I love how you guys support my own small projects as well! You guys have made me feel comfortable talking about my interests in a really long time and I just want to thank you for that 💜💜💜

You guys are amazing and I hope you two never stop being you (except maybe Tari...stop being rude /silly/j)

@livzees HI WIFE YOU LOVABLE BEST PERSON I HAVE EVER MET YOU!!!!!! You are the best person I have ever had the chance to meet and get to know! You're super funny and your art is really cool and I love all that you do and create including your Rivalry Au! You don't mind if I yap too much or send you the dumbest things, you make me feel seen and noticed and I am so happy I can be silly with you (considering I proposed with an onion ring)

Seeing you pop up on my screen makes my day and being with you in VC trying to make you laugh at my dumb jokes makes me happy! I love you sm (/p) and always keep being your amazing lovable you ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@sakuwura-meow-meow , @cookiepopcat and @xcoffeebomb YOU GUYSSSSSS UGHHH WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN?????? You 3 are the coolest people ever in my eyes, even though I tend to make fun of you a lot...you mean a lot to me. You listened, you laughed, and you supported me when I felt like no was. You made me feel like I belong and that I mattered.

You all helped me get out of my shell which I am grateful for (but you should also be terrified about too, I have breeched containment and cannot be held for much longer /hj) I hope you 3 never stop being your amazing selves and I hope you know that you all hold a very special place in my half dead bitchy heart ❤️❤️❤️

@axelcx11z and @coralalala64 YOUUUU!!!! THE SILLIES!!!! YES YOU!!! YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!!! I'll have to admit...talking to you guys at first was so nerve-racking for me because I look up to y'all but after some chats...I realize y'all are just a bunch of the silliest people ever lol but I love that about yous.

Cora, you are the first person I saw on my page and instantly had to follow because I thought your art style was so cool and I think your Aus and your own characters and creatures (as deadly as they can be, one of them gave me rabies /hj) is the wonderful silly aspect about you that I love 🫴👑✨

Axel, you're the chilliest guy I have ever had the pleasure of meeting and I love how you even consider me your doppelganger considering how little we interact lol (sorry, I'm just too shy) . I still totally love all that you do tho no matter what fandom you're in; I fell in love with your style when I first saw it so never stop creating dude 🫴👑✨

@tiredsmashbros , @its-a-me-mango and @libbytwq or as I call you, the holy Smg4 Trinity /silly. It was such an honor to finally meet you all in the TSB server but to be honest I was also on the verge of having a panic attack because I was overwhelmed being surrounded by a bunch of people I look up to the most. I know I'm not active much and I barely have anything to say (unless it's about AJR or my cursed hear me outs) But I absolutely enjoyed any interaction I got.

You guys are the biggest inspirations in my life and I hope that one day I'll be able to achieve what you do (but not today lol) you guys are awesome, I love your rants and your complicated lore and most of all, I love your art and I hope you never stop doing what you love 🫴👑👑👑✨✨✨

@bear-boi-5 HI! HELLO! IT'S ME! YOU ARE ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE I LOOKED UP TO! When I first joined Tumblr, I remember your pretty little masked face /silly showing up on my screen and I immediately saw and loved it! You are such a master at traditional art and I love how detailed it is and how cool it looks!

When you first made fanart of my Smg5 I was absolutely shook considering at the time I was still a fairly small creator with only like 50 followers lmao but I want to thank you, if you didn't draw my Smg5 I probably wouldn't have drawn her much either assuming that people just hated her.

Meeting you in the TSB server was the coolest thing in my life because you're one chill dude and I hope that maybe when I overcome my overbearing shyness we could get to know each other better lol

🫴👑✨

@bluestrawberrybunny and @briandraws Brian, you're a freak /pos like HOW???? HOW DO YOU HAVE THE TIME, AND THE PASSION AND THE ENERGY FOR WHAT YOU DO???? Honestly if I ever had the amount of energy you have, I would be in a bloody coma. You are the first person I ever had the chance of actually connecting with a Tumblr moot (and realizing how unhinged they are /hj) but I just wanted to say thank you for tolerating me this long lol. Your an amazing artist and even an amazing author (even though I think you should be sentenced to a mental hospital for flooding the server about your Marware obsession /j )

And you! Blue! I love all your work as well! I love apprenticeship and I love your tangents! Having you and meeting you in the server has been a treat but it's also nerve racking because I'm still shy lol. I think your art is so cute and I hope you never stop!

🫴👑👑✨✨

Because of the song I couldn't add as many people as I wanted but here are some honorable mentions!

@deltaruinedcoco37 @purpdrawsthings @hamlos @chaoticlad @bow-and-aro-child @theartistisme43 @b-r-i-n-g-x @grinnames @strange0-0storm @goofy-goobers-things @arco-doodles @artist-heart83 @sspacesillyy @hi-imlooneybirdie @pisschxn @rainstormsart and PLENTY MORE BUT TUMBLR FUCKING HATES ME SO IF YOU SEE THIS THEN I LIKE YOU TOO

I love all that you guys do wether that be art or writing or theories or ANYTHING ELSE just know that you'll always have a supporter 🫴👑✨

Now this brings me to the end of my birthday party sadly, I hope y'all liked it and I hope y'all didn't eat all of my birthday cake and thank you for all the birthday art and wishes but before y'all go...

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

The many joys of sharing your birthday with a holiday, it's often overlooked lol but I hope you guys enjoy it whether you're alone or you have a partner. Practice self love too because you're also important ❤️❤️❤️

Okay that's it

BI Y'ALL!

#art blog #artists on tumblr #sona art #my birthday #EEEEE I HOPE YALL ENJOYED #I HOPE YOU ALL KNOW THAT YOU ARE LOVED #I hope you have a wonderful day this day lol #also if any of you try to @ me or something just know I won't get back to youe until monday probably because I'm leaving for a trip #okay bi

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