#and of course it has laurie with long flowing hair

[lauriesmydemon]

I had to follow through on Blair's request for a drawing of Laurie's mindpalace from today's board game club

[elianamarie-blog]

The Things You Give Part 17

Steven Hyde x Reader

Happy Friday guys! I can’t believe this story has been going on this long lol I didn’t think it would get this far. But here we are! Let me know what you think and if you’d like to be added to the tagslist, please let me know and I’d be more than happy to add you :) I’m not too sure how much longer this is going go tbh. I don’t want it go on for too long but I also have quite a bit to still put in, so it might just be be longer chapters. Who knows. Let me know what you think in the comments! Plus, I love hearing from you all. Enjoy the chapter!

“So, have you heard from Hyde?” Donna asked y/n over the phone.           

 “No,” she replied glumly. “It’s been three days. He hasn’t come home and I’ve had to tell my parents that he took a few days to go be with his dad in Milwaukee.”            

“What about Eric?”            

“He’s still acting weird,” Y/n answered, sighing into the phone. “He barley looks at me and doesn’t even talk to me. And if he does, it’s short and kind of awkward. He can’t even make eye contact with me.”           

 “Yeah,” Donna said absentmindedly. “He isn’t even talking to me. And I’m his girlfriend!”            

“Well, to be fair, you are in California visiting your mom.”            

“There’s still the phone!”            

“Fair point,” Y/n said and turned onto her back as she laid on her bed. “I still haven’t told my parents. I’m so scared.”           

 “Hyde is too.”           

 “Clearly or else he’d be here.” Y/n sighed and rubbed her tired eyes. She hadn’t gotten enough sleep these last few days, tossing and turning all night.            

“Are you okay though?” Donna asked, concern laced in her voice.           

 “Honestly? No. But I don’t have a choice but to be. I’m going to have a baby and I have to be strong for it. No matter how hard it may be.”            

 “You are so strong,” Donna said and wished she could y/n a hug. “You’re going to make it through this. This won’t last forever.”          

  “God, I hope so.”           

“Hey, it’s going to be okay. If you ever need a place to stay, you can stay over at my place.”            

“Thank you, Donna. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”           

 “Yeah, I know,” Donna joked making y/n laugh. “You’re my best friend. That’s what they do.”           

 “When do you get back?”           

 “Tomorrow. You want to come and get me from the airport?”           

 “I’d love that,” Y/n answered. “We can go grab some food while we’re at it. I’ve been throwing up so much that I feel like I can eat a whole restaurant.”            

Donna chuckled. “Pregnancy will do that to you.”            

Y/n smiled. “You have no idea.”            

“Alright, well, I’m going to go. My mom wants to take me to the beach and out to eat before I leave.”            

“Okay, well you have fun.”            

“I will. I’ll see you tomorrow.”           

 “See you tomorrow.”            

Y/n  hung up the phone and stared at the ceiling for a while. Tears threatened to spill down the side of her face, but she forced them down. Hyde was coming back, she knew him. She knew his heart. He wouldn’t abandon them like the man he thought was his father did. He loved her. Right?           

 “ Y/n, honey?” Kitty called from down the hall, snapping Y/n out of her thoughts. “ Y/n, dinner is ready!”           

 “Ok, I’ll be down in a minute, Mom,” she replied and sat up from her bed. She took a quick glance in the mirror, checking out her baby bump. She sighed in relief when she saw she wasn’t showing yet. “Soon, though,” she whispered to herself as she walked out her room.           

She walked in the kitchen to be greeted by everyone, except for Steven.            

“So, have either of you heard from Steven?” Kitty asked the twins as she set down the chicken.            

“Who cares? He’s out of the house,” Laurie commented.            

“Laurie, hush,” Kitty said sternly.            

 “No, I have not heard from him,” Y/n said sourly. “What about you Eric?”            

“Yeah, he called,” Eric said, not looking up from his plate. “He said he’ll be back tomorrow night.”             

“Oh, good!” Kitty smiled and sat down with her family.           

 “Yeah, great,” Laurie deadpanned, earning an elbow to the ribs from Y/n.             

“Why don’t you like him?” she asked.            

“Because he mooches off of mom and daddy,” she replied.            

“Wh—” Y/n started, confused. “So do you!”           

 “No, I don’t,” she argued. “All I’m saying is that Mom and Dad work really hard around here and nothing here is cheap.”            

“Except you,” Eric quipped, earning a laugh from his twin.           

 Laurie rolled her eyes, feeling agitated. “Believe me, I’m not cheap.”            

“Fine, free. Whatever,” the twins said together and then looked at each other before laughing. If Y/n were being honest, she was happy that they were laughing together at something. Even though that something was their older sister. Even if Y/n wasn’t pregnant she still gets a kick out of it.           

 “Okay, that’s enough you three,” Red said, unamused.            

Y/n and Eric were still giggling as they turned back to their plates. As Y/n looked down at the plate in front of her, chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, and rolls, she couldn’t help but scrunch up her nose. Her heightened senses made everything smell so gross now and it was driving her crazy.           

 “What’s the matter?” Kitty asked, noticing her daughter’s distain towards the food. “Is something wrong with my chicken?”            

Y/n’s eyes snapped up to meet her mother’s. “No, no! Not at all, just…uh…not sure if I’m feeling chicken tonight.”           

 “But you love chicken,” Kitty said, almost sad.            

Y/n saw her mom’s sad eyes and panicked. “No, no it’s good! See.” She shoved a leg into her mouth and felt the juices drip down her chin

 She wanted to gag, but forced herself not to. Not now, kid.            

Y/n hummed in satisfaction as she swallowed the chicken, earning a smile from her mother. “So good.”            

“Huh,” Laurie said, pouting in thought. “Why does that look and sound familiar?” 

“Maybe because it’s usually you—” Eric started before Kitty cut him off, screaming.           

 “Eric, if you want to live to see your grand-children, you better not finish that sentence,” she warned. Eric looked over to Red who was giving him a hard stare.           

 Eric quickly looked down at his plate and was quiet for the rest of the evening.                                                                 

                                                  --Time Skip—           

Y/n found her head in the toilet that night, emptying the contents of her stomach of the evening’s meal into the toilet. She was trying hard to be discreet, but that showed to be a failure when Eric knocked on the door.            

“ Y/n? Are you okay?”           

 “What do you want—” Her head immediately went back into the toilet.            

Eric let himself in and saw his sister in her weakened and vulnerable state. He gathered her hair in his hands and rubbed her back. “Are you okay? What’s going on?”           

 “Mom’s chicken didn’t agree with me,” she whined, wiping the drool from her mouth with a piece of toilet paper. “Or the baby didn’t agree with the chicken.”          

  “God, I’m sorry,” Eric sympathized. “Look, we need to talk, but first, maybe you should brush your teeth.”           

 “I feel like we’ve been having a lot of talks lately,” Y/n tried to joke, but only came off as a whimper and she could feel her stomach churning again. She turned her face into the toilet once again and let out a long, painful, retched noise. “This kid is going to kill me,” she groaned.            

Eric waited until Y/n was finished vomiting before helping her up and taking her to her room. “Are you okay? Do you need anything?”            

“Well to stop vomiting would be nice, but what I really need is to know where Hyde is,” she said, staring at her brother. “When were you going to tell me that he called? Why didn’t he want to talk to me?”            

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” he said and sat at her desk chair. “This isn’t easy for any of us, you know this.”            

“Oh, I’m so sorry that you have to carry the burden of mine and Hyde’s baby,” Y/n said, rolling his eyes.             

Eric sighed frustratingly. “ Y/n, focus will you?”            

She shut her mouth and looked at Eric nervously.             

“He’s coming back,” he started. “He just needed a few days to think. He even got a hold of his dad in Milwaukee and spoke to him, but he’s not sure how he’s supposed to handle this. I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you would be upset. He wanted to talk to you, but he said he needs to talk to you face to face.”            

Tears started to burn her eyes. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, Eric,” she croaked. “I’ve been alone in this since he left. The only person who was there for me was Donna and Jackie. And Donna has been gone in California for a few days while Jackie has been…well, being Jackie. The father of my child disappeared and my own brother wouldn’t even speak to me. Do you have any idea how crushing it is to be alone in this?”            

“See, that’s the thing, you’re not alone!” Eric said. “Regardless of how I or Mom and Dad feel, you’re still going to have help raising this baby. Whether I like it or not, I’m going to be the uncle to my best friend’s and twin sister’s baby. Trust me, this isn’t what I thought would happen at all, but it did. And I came to realize that there is no point in being mad at you when it’s already done. I want to be here for you and Hyde. This is going to be my niece or nephew and…I don’t know, it’s kind of growing on me.”            

Tears continued to flow down Y/n’s face. “Thank you, Eric. That means so much.”            

Confused, Eric reached out to her and pulled her in. “I’m sorry. Did I say something wrong?”            

“No,” she sniffed and hiccupped. “Just pregnancy hormones.”            

“And we’re all going to have to deal with this for eight more months. Yayyy,” Eric mused.            

Y/n laughed and sat up. She stared down at her lap for a minute while Eric studied her. Something was on her mind and he knew it. “Talk to me.”            

She looked back up and wiped at her eyes. “Is Hyde going to leave me to raise this baby by myself?”            

“What? No, of course not,” Eric said gently. “Look, he loves you. He’s told me so. I don’t see him leaving. He knows if he does anymore screw ups, I’m going to kick his ass.”            

“Your leg would break midair before it could,” Y/n joked earning a laugh from Eric.            

“Yeah, probably,” he joked.            

“I feel like I’ve asked this more than I should, but…are we good?”            

Eric nodded, giving her a half smile. “Yeah, we’re good.”            

Y/n smiled at her twin. “So, uh, how do you think Dad is going to take it?”            

“Well,” he said, thinking. “I’ve come to two possibilities. One, he kills you and Hyde. Or two, he’ll get so mad, his head will explode.”            

Y/n laughed once again, the weight on her shoulders lifting a little.                                                

                                                  --Time Skip—            

The next night, Y/n and the gang sat in the basement with Hyde still missing. 

After Y/n had picked up Donna, they had picked up burgers for everyone.           

 “Thanks for dinner, Y/n,” Kelso said.             

“No problem,” she answered with a mouthful of fries. “I’ve been craving burgers and thought I could get everyone some, so you all don’t feel left out.”           

“Well, you should get pregnant more often,” Kelso laughed into his burger.            

Y/n gave him a ‘are you dumb’ look. “I think I’m going to pass on that.”            

“So, Eric,” Kelso continued, licking his fingers. “Now that we’re past the awkward stage about Y/n’s pregnancy, all I gotta say is BURN!”            

The group laughed, but Eric’s face remained stoic. “Hilarious.”           

 “C’mon, Eric, you’re going to be an uncle,” Jackie chimed in. “Aren’t you excited?”            

“Well, kind of actually,” he answered honestly.            

“Wait, really?” Y/n asked in surprised, mouth full of food.            

“Yeah, but I’m not excited what’s going to happen when Dad finds out.”            

“Yeah, we’re going to hear on the news that the Forman’s house blew up,” Fez joked.            

“Make sure we’re all in our basements, duck and cover,” Donna said, laughing with the group.            

“You guys are hilarious,” Y/n deadpanned and took a sip of her milkshake.            

“I’d like to think we are,” Fez said.            

Y/n chuckled as she took a bite of her burger. “It’s all fun and games until a father with anger issues explodes.”            

“I’m going to have to disappear for a few days, or weeks…or years,” Eric said, staring in the distance. “You know what, I’ll just start packing for Mexico now.”            

“Shut up, Eric. Dad’s not going to blame you.”           

 “Oh really?” Eric asked, setting aside his finished food. “When you failed your geometry test sophomore year, he asked me why I didn’t help you study. When I told I didn’t pass the test either, he asked why I didn’t help you cheat.” He shook his head.            

“Well, I don’t think a geometry test is equivalent to a baby,” Y/n responded. “And besides, I don’t think you wanted to be there to stop me from getting pregnant.”            

“Yeah, thanks for that.” Eric scrunched his face in disgust while everyone agreed how gross and creepy that would be.            

“Anyway,” Donna said, clearing her throat. “Have you thought about what you want to have?”            

“Not really,” Y/n replied and finished off her burger. “I’ll love them whether they’re a boy or a girl.”            

“Do you think you’ll have twins since you’re one?” Jackie asked.            

“Nah,” she replied. “It’s like, less than one percent chance of having twins. I highly doubt it.”             

“Well, if you have a girl, you should name her Jackie,” Jackie said. “If it’s a boy, Jack.”            

“You hate it when I call you Jack,” Y/n pointed out.            

“Yeah, but if it’s a baby named after me, I can deal with it,” she said and flipped her hair.            

Y/n rolled her eyes. “I’m not naming my baby after you.”            

“Why not?!”            

“Because I don’t need that hanging over my head!” Y/n responded and took the last bite of her burger. “We’re going to name the baby something completely different.”            

“Like what?” Fez asked.            

“I don’t know,” Y/n shrugged. “I’m only four weeks.”            

“When’s your doctor’s appointment?” Eric asked.            

“In two weeks,” Y/n answered. “They’re going to see if they can detect a heartbeat.”            

“Yeah, they have this really cool machine now where they can use the ultrasound to see and hear the baby’s heartbeat. It’s pretty cool,” Donna said. “Kelso, did they use that with Brooke’s pregnancy?”            

“Yeah, it was really cool,” Kelso responded and threw away his trash. “It’s really beautiful to see your baby like that.”           

 “Didn’t they give you a picture?” Y/n asked.            

“Yes. Brooke still has it on her fridge.”            

“How exciting!” Jackie said.             

“Yeah,” Y/n trailed off.            

“What?” Fez asked.            

“Well, seeing my baby, it’s going to make it real,” she whispered.            

“Well, it already is,” Donna said. “But it’s going to be okay.”            

She was rubbing a comforting hand on Y/n’s shoulder when the door swung open. Y/n turned to see Hyde standing there with the same clothes he wore three days prior. She wanted to run into his arms and kiss him, but she also wanted to punch him in the face.            

“Hey,” he greeted her, rather awkwardly.             

“Hey,” she replied gravely.            

“Where the hell have you been?” Donna asked him.            

“I was just driving around. Went up to Milwaukee to see my dad.”            

“Where did you sleep?” Fez asked.            

“Either in my car or a motel.”            

Y/n nodded and looked down at her hands. Her stomach knotting up and tears burning the back of her eyes.            

“Look, Y/n, we need to talk—”            

“You left me,” she snapped. “You promised you wouldn’t, but you did.”            

“I didn’t leave you,” he argued. “I just needed some time to think.”            

Y/n stood to face him. “You were gone for three days! You didn’t even call to speak to me. You spoke to Eric instead!”            

“I know, but please listen to me—can you hang on a second?” He turned his attention to the group. “Would you guys get out of here?”            

The group turned and walked away, but only a few feet and huddled in the corner by the stairs so they could listen. Y/n rolled her eyes and turned back to Steven.            

“ Y/n, please believe me when I say I really wanted to talk to you, but I needed to see you first.”            

“Okay,” she said and crossed her arms. “Go ahead. Talk.”            

Hyde exhaled and scratched the back of his head. “I…I panicked, okay? This was the last thing I was expecting.”            

“And I was?!” Y/n asked, voice rising. “See, here’s the difference between you and me: if I ran like you did, I wouldn’t be able to run away from my problems. Because wherever I go, it goes. I can’t outrun this problem, Steven. Even if I wanted to. But you did and when I needed you the most, you weren’t here!”            

“I know. I know I messed up, but that’s why I’m here. I l—” he looked at the group who awkwardly (and not subtly) looked away in other directions, making it look like they weren’t listening. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? It’s a lot to take in. We’re barley out of high school and I get hit with, ‘You’re going to be a father.’ God, I can’t believe this is happening. How is this happening?” He turned away from her, hands rubbing his eyes.            

“Well, it is,” Y/n said. “I’m just as scared as you, but I didn’t run away.”            

“I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to be gone as long as I was. I just needed to think of what I was going to do. I don’t know what I’m going to do,” he said. “I didn’t have a dad growing up. The only one I knew was Bud and he ran out on me. I’m not sure I even know how to be one. What if I end up being just like him? I can’t do that to you.”            

“Okay, guys, I think we should go,” Donna whispered once she realized where this conversation was heading. “We’ll talk to them later.”           

 “But I wanna listen,” Kelso whined, but hissed when Jackie pinched his nipple. “Damn, Jackie!”            

“Let’s go, Michael,” she said sternly.             

The group retreated upstairs, leaving Y/n and Hyde alone in the basement. Hyde sunk down onto the coffee table and put his head in his hands. Y/n sat down next him and rubbed a comforting hand on his back.            

“Well, you’re not going to be like Bud.”            

“How do you know that?”            

“Because you left out someone who did become a father to you: Red. He stuck around and continued to help you even when you pissed him off. He’ll never say it, but he loves you. And if anything, you’ll be like him.”            

“He’s not going to when he finds out what I did to you.”            

Y/n made a face at him. “You knocked me up, you didn’t kill me.”            

“What are we going to do?” he asked. “I don’t know,” she responded. “I don’t know about you, but I’m terrified.”

“You have no idea. My job doesn’t pay me enough to support you and a kid. I don’t even think I get benefits. Aw, crap…should we just get married?”            

Y/n made a face at him. “’Aw, crap. Should we just get married?’ Is that how you fix things?”            

“How else do you suggest we fix this?” he asked.            

“Well, by not getting engaged!” Y/n pointed out and stood up. “You really think us getting married because we’re having a baby is the right answer?”            

“Well, what do you suggest?”           

 “I don’t know, Steven, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to marry me.”     

Y/n started pacing the floor while Hyde stared at the wall, desperate to find an answer.            

“By the way, I didn’t kiss her,” he piped up after a moment of silence. “She kissed me.”            

“I know,” Y/n stopped pacing. “Everyone told me.”            

“Good,” he said and sighed. “I was afraid you would think I’d do that to you.”            

“You’re a lot of things, Steven, but a cheater isn’t one of them.”            

“I hope those are good things,” he chuckled halfheartedly, trying to lighten the mood.            

She smiled gently at him. “Most of them are. You’re still a huge pain in the ass though.”            

Hyde lifted the corner of his mouth in amusement. “Maybe, I can get a job with W.B.,” he suggested. “He might’ve…already offered me a job.”            

“Hey, that’s great!” Y/n said excitedly and sat down next to him.            

“I think I might take it.”            

“You should,” she encouraged him. “I applied to the state college here, but I think I’m going to apply to the community college and get a part time job.”            

“No, let me worry about the bills,” he said. “I’m the man, that’s what I’m supposed to do.”            

She squinted at him. “This isn’t twenty years ago. I can work and help with the bills.”            

“It’s okay, really.” He turned and grabbed her hands. “Let me work and take care of the bills while you go to school.”            

“Okay, well, we’re going to have to figure out where to live. I’m pretty sure my parents don’t want a baby living in the house.”            

“Yeah, we’ll start apartment hunting,” he grunted and stood up.             

Y/n watched him pace back and forth; he sighed and rubbed his face. He stopped pacing and looked lost in thought. “Maybe it is with you,” he said suddenly and gently.            

“What?”            

“Just now when you asked if us getting married was the right answer because we’re having a baby, I’m saying maybe it is. I mean,” he continued. “This is not exactly ideal, but we did talk about settling down before. Maybe, you know, this time is…now?”           

Y/n blinked. “Are you…actually asking me to marry you right now?”            

“Well…” he drew out, suddenly acting shy. “I guess I am.” He scratched his head.             

She shook her head. “Steven, I told you I don’t want you to feel like you have to marry me.”            

“See, that’s the thing I don’t,” he answered quickly. “I actually want to.”            

She raised her eyebrows. “You do?”            

“Yes. I know how I used to feel about marriage, but that was when I thought all women were the same or…like my mom.” Y/n chuckled lightly along with Hyde and he continued. “But, you’ve changed all that. You forced me to see a different picture painted in a whole new light and honestly…it’s refreshing.”            

“I feel the same way,” she said, giving him a shy smile.            

“I just, uh…I wanted to do this right. You know?”            

“Well,” she said quietly, her heart thumping wildly. “You still can.”            

“I don’t even have a ring. Not yet at least.”            

“It’s okay,” Y/n whispered.             

Hyde smiled so sweetly at her before nervously grabbing her hand and getting down on one knee. “I know that nothing about our situation has been easy. We’ve only been together for a short while, but I’ve known you my whole life. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before and for the first time I actually mean it when I say I love a girl and not just saying it to sleep with her.”             

Y/n squeezed his hand a little tighter as he continued. “And as much as I used to hate commitment then, you’ve changed me. You make me a better man. If you’ll have me, I promise to stay and do my best to make you happy because you make me happiest that I have ever been.”            

Tears pricked the corner of Y/n’s eyes as she smiled widely. She couldn’t believe this was happening because she never thought it would. She remembers when he used to be so against marriage, but here he was voluntarily on one knee, asking her to marry him.            

“So, Y/f/n y/m/n Forman, will you marry me?”            

Y/n nodded while tears started to run down her face. “Yes,” she whispered.            

Hyde smiled brightly at her as she stood up and swiftly brought her face to his. He held onto her tight as he kissed her hard. They relished the feeling of each other’s lips and the emotion they both felt. Hyde found himself surprised that he wasn’t freaking out and Y/n found herself excited.             

Their kiss was broken short though as the group came crashing down the stairs.           

 “ENGAGED?!” They all shouted.             

“Were you guys listening this whole time?!” Hyde asked them.            

“Duh,” Jackie responded which earned her an elbow to the ribs from Donna. “Ow, Donna! What the hell was that for?”            

“Are you guys serious?” Eric asked, ignoring the girls and walked down towards the couple. “Are you really engaged?”            

“Are you mad?” Y/n asked.             

Eric shook his head. “No, I’m done being mad. I’ve been doing that a lot lately,” he said and chuckled. “If anything I’m just…shocked. Especially with how fast all this has been moving. I never thought in a million years this would happen.” He rubbed his lips with his fingertips, as if lost in thought and sighed. “But, uh, congratulations, guys.”            

He brought Hyde in for a hug, patting his back and then brought Y/n in for a tight hug. If anything he was feeling conflicted. Was he mad at them? No, not at all. Was he happy? Yes, of course. But, what he was feeling most of all was…sadness?            

Maybe because the group was changing drastically now. Kelso was becoming a police officer and just became a father himself, Donna was working at the radio station and setting goals for herself with feminism, Fez had a steady job working at the DMV, Jackie was…well, he didn’t know what the hell Jackie was doing, and now Hyde and Y/n were not only having a baby, but they were now getting married and he was now going to be working with W.B at an awesome record company. And what was Eric doing? Besides lazing around the house doing absolutely nothing while watching his friends and sister were working to do something amazing with their lives. His year of not doing anything was almost up and while he enjoyed sleeping in and doing nothing all day long, he was starting to see the down side of it all. And it was hitting him hard.             

“Are you okay?” Y/n asked him, seeing his face change.            

“Yeah,” he lied and plastered on a fake smile. “I’m just thinking of what you’re going to say to Mom and Dad.”             

“Yeah, don’t remind me.”            

“Oh, Y/n this is so exciting!” Jackie squealed coming down the stairs and interrupting their conversation. Everyone in the group trailed behind her. “I can’t wait to start wedding planning! But first, we need to get you a ring!” She gasped dramatically. “Oh my God, who’s going to be your maid of honor? If it’s not me I’m going to scream.”            

Y/n laughed and placed her hands on Jackie’s arms. “Hey, calm down, Jack. It’s not happening yet. I’m just taking it one day at a time.”            

“Well, you better tell them soon because it’s going to get harder to hide a baby bump,” Eric said.            

“I know. I was actually thinking of telling them tonight,” she said which caused the group to go silent. “What?”            

“Should we start planning your funeral now or?” Donna joked.             

“Funny,” she deadpanned. “No, I think it will be fine now that Steven and I have a plan.”            

Eric nodded and pressed his lips into a thin line. “It was nice knowing you. Both of you.” He gave her a hug which Y/n shrugged off.             

“Alright that’s enough,” she said and stepped back. “They can’t be too mad…can they?”            

Again, the group went silent, looking at each other; Trying to decide who is the better liar. But no lie could be good enough to determine what was about to happen with Red and Kitty.            

Fez stepped forward wearing the most serious expression Y/n has ever seen. “Before you do, I just wanted to say how much I love you guys and how much I’m going to miss you.” He dramatically wrapped his arms around Hyde and start faux sobbing. The group laughed at Fez as Hyde shoved him off.                                                           

                                                    --Time Skip—            

Y/n waited in the basement for another couple hours, working the nerve to go up there and tell her parents. The gang had decided to stay and come up with a plan, but nothing seemed good enough to prepare them for the upcoming explosion known as Red.             

“Okay, so here’s the plan,” Y/n said, exhausted. “I tell them, Steven you have the El Camino ready when things go south, Eric have the Vista Cruiser ready in case Dad tries to kill you, and everybody, whatever you do: act dumb. You didn’t know I was pregnant and just run like hell.”            

Everybody nodded in compliance as Y/n laid back against the couch. “I should probably go up there now,” she said, her stomach twisting into knots, her head swimming.            

“Do you need me to go with you?” Hyde offered.            

“No, no, you stay here. If I don’t make it back in,” she responded dramatically. “Please, move on without me. I love you.”            

Hyde grabbed her hand. “Hey, don’t talk like that. We will get out of this alive.”            

Y/n gave him a single nod. “Okay, here I go.”            

“Wait, Y/n,” Kelso said, abruptly stand up and gave her a hug. “Goodbye.”            

Y/n gave a theatrical sniff as if she was crying. “Goodbye, Kelso. I’ll miss you the most.”            

“Really?” he asked brightly and turned to Hyde as if to say I knew it.            

“No,” she deadpanned and pushed him away from her before walking up the stairs, hearing the chuckles fade away as she entered the kitchen.            

She saw Kitty sitting at the kitchen table, hunched over scribbling something on a piece of paper.            

“Hey mom,” Y/n’s voice wavered, her knees starting to wobble, but she played it off as if nothing was wrong. To hide her nervousness, she opened the fridge and grabbed a soda can. “What cha doin’?”            

“Oh, I’m just going over your medical bill,” Kitty replied and Y/n felt her heart drop to her feet. “I see that they ran some extra tests which explains why we have to pay a bit more. Plus, the ambulance ride didn’t help any.”            

“Oh, okay. I’ll help pay that back,” she replied and looked around. “So, uh, where’s Dad?”            

“Oh, he’s out getting dinner.”            

“Oh, okay,” she replied and opened her water, taking a hefty sip. Kitty looked up from the paper and noticed Y/n acting different. In fact, Y/n’s eyes were glossy and she looked like she was about to vomit again at any second.            

“ Y/n, honey? What’s wrong?” Kitty asked, concerned.             

Y/n’s chin wobbled as she gripped the can tighter. Do it. Do it now! She stared at her mother who had completely abandoned her task and now was staring at her daughter.             

Y/n couldn’t find the words. She stood there, like an idiot, or as her father would say, like a dopehead. Her eyes were wide and she could feel cold perspiration beginning to cover her palms.             

It’s now or never.            

“Mommy,” she said in a small voice. “I need to tell you something.”

Taglist: @jeeperky​ @05-feet-off-the-table-06​ @cooloclown​ @mdittyz123​ @n-dg-wm​ @undead-sierra​ @random-thoughts-003​ @lieswithoutfairytales​ @taysirene​

[erensnubs]

𝑳𝒂𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑱𝒐

Hanamaki Takihiro x GN! Reader

Based off of the Laurie and Jo Scene in Little Women

Summary: Sometimes first loves never work out

Content: Angst, pure angst

From pirate ships, to being monarchs and warriors of old, you and Hanamaki Takahiro, were best friends.

He was the little boy who moved in next door, snot running down his nose, hands stained with dirt as he offered you a piece offering of roly polies and leaves.

You were the little kid who rolled around in the mud and terrorized the other kids by throwing sticks at them.

Needless to say you immediately became best friends. And menaces to your parents, the neighborhood kids and society in general.

You were together from the young ages of kindergarten, you were there to witness Hanamaki's awkward stage of puberty. You were there to witness him making other friends than you and lovers.

He was there when he saw you make other friends than him, dating a lot of people. He was there when you were scared of going to middle school, was there when you had anxiety over grades.

You were there for each other all the time, ups and downs, triumphs and trials.

So it was natural, that Hanamaki fell, completely and hopelessly;

In love with you.

You're running in the grass, rolling around with Hanamaki laughing your asses off. You guys have just graduated highschool and the two of you, being the dumb bitches you are decide to skip the family party to celebrate your accomplishments. 

“We’re adults now!” You yell, half skipping down the hill and eventually trip. 

You pick yourself up and start screaming. 

“I’M FREE FROM THIS GOD FORSAKEN TOWN! WE’RE FREE!” 

Hanamaki laughs, “Yeah says the one who barely passed history.” 

He grabs you by the arm and drags you through the flowers of the field and sets you down, all the while you giggle deliriously. 

Usually Hanamaki would be laughing along, making stupid jokes about your laugh. 

But he doesn’t. 

And it scares you. 

Before you even open your mouth to say anything, Hanamaki plops down beside you and thoughtfully asks, 

“What are we going to do, [Name]? After here?” 

The question sounded serious not like those ones where he asked you if he looked sexy for prom or if his crocs match the vibe of the weather that day. 

You paused to take in the question. 

“Well... I can’t really answer that Hiro Out of our whole friend group we’ve always been the floaters. The ones that never really know what we’re doing...” 

Hanamaki turns his head around, baby hairs sticking onto his skin from the sweat of running. His eyes are looking at you, no they’re looking through you. 

He breathes out a yes, like he’s been holding something from you. A secret he didn’t want to tell. 

You turn away abruptly hoping he doesn’t see your slight change of attitude. 

“Iwaizumi’s going to America, Mattsun is getting ready for college, and you know Oikawa is going over to Brazil to pursue volleyball.” 

“I honestly don’t know Hiro. I get that we can’t be kids who run around more and throw dirt at each other,” you say laughing softly. 

Hanamaki scoffs, “But you wish it was like that huh?” 

You sit up and pick the grass from the ground and throw it randomly into the air. 

“Of course! I still want to get a pirate ship and go and travel the world with you.” 

Hanamaki raises his eyebrows, “And steal gold from random people?” 

You smile cheekily, “Of course. Then we’ll build our chocolate empire, something that could rival Willy Wonka’s.” 

Hanamaki stands up and puts his hand out to you. 

You grab it, but why do you feel like the gesture is something much more than a friendly hand? 

The two of you start walking, swinging your arms around as you joke about your chocolate factory, your pirate ships, the adventures you’re going to have. 

The sun was setting, the long, green blades of grass turning yellow as you and Hanamaki run through them, creating scars and bumps on your skin. 

You were going to miss highschool. You were going to miss groaning about exams and certain substitute teachers. Miss skipping classes with Mattsun and Makki to go get wasted with cheap alcohol. 

You were going to miss Oikawa and his stupid smile and Iwaizumi and his stupid nicknames. You were going to miss crying with the 3rd years over lost volleyball games. 

Hell, you were probably going to cry when Oikawa and Iwaizumi left to continue their lives. You might even cry when Mattsun goes to college even if he isn’t going overseas. 

But at least you had Hanamaki. Your dearest friend. Though your relationship has gotten deeper and you were able to confide with each other, you were still the 2 children that fought other kids on the playground. 

You could always, always rely on him. Because you never changed with each other. 

“[Name]?” 

You turn around and see Hanamaki. His eyes glowed with something. 

And it was not of the setting sun. 

“Yes?” You say, the sky turning darker as moments pass. 

“I know we talk about us being adventurous and going with the flow... but I feel like we could do something more, you know?” he says it quietly, his thumb subconsciously rubbing yours. 

You look up at him, “What do you mean? You just want to suddenly work a 9-5 job in a corporate company? We talked about this Hiro...” 

He looks taken aback, “No no, that’s not what I meant [Name].”

Hanamaki gets quieter, “We could always be little kids, playing with swords and sticks. Together.” 

You pause as Hanamaki looks up at your eyes. Together? You’ve always been together? Always. 

Wait. 

He couldn’t possibly mean. 

You pull back from his grasp, 

“No Hiro I can’t do that. Please no.” 

You start walking away from him and he advances as he argues, trying to salvage something. 

“[Name], no I love you and I have always loved you since we were little! I can’t imagine myself being with anyone else besides you!” 

You walk faster and wrap your arms around yourself, “No, no, no. Hiro you’re being ridiculous.” 

“Yes, YES!” 

“No! We can’t!” 

“[NAME]! COME BACK HERE LET ME SEE YOU!” Hanamaki says running towards you. 

You spin around and stare at him, “We can’t work Hiro! I could never love you that way, and I would be lying, God I would be lying if I said that I did. Our whole life together we’re going to be pretending.” 

He runs his fingers through his hair in frustration, “Why?! We were just talking about doing adventures together! Why is that any different than what I proposed!?” 

You stomp your foot onto the ground, “Did you not just listen to me you dipshit? I could never love you romantically! Ever! I care for you, I worry for you but Hanamaki you are my friend. My closest friend. You are the one thing in my life that hasn’t changed so quickly and then you pull this shit?” 

Hanamaki starts yelling now, “BUT I MAKE YOU HAPPY! AND YOU MAKE ME HAPPY! WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER SIDE BY SIDE, FOR YEARS [NAME]! YEARS! I HAVE DONE EVERYTHING I COULD HAVE TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU!” 

You start shaking your head, “No, don’t say that.”

Hanamaki starts rambling, “You always tell me that words and actions are your love languages- 

“Stop.” 

“And I’ve been doing it, [Name]. I have. I have been there for you, anywhere and-and-”

“Takihiro stop.” 

“And I can’t feel like this anymore. I can’t let you slip through my fingers and watch you run away from me like everyone else has-”

“TAKIHIRO STOP IT!” 

The only things that you could hear were the sounds of your breathing and the crickets in the grass. 

“Takihiro, you’re being a child. You’re being stupid and ridiculous. Do not let the fantasies of a boy ruin your future,” you say sternly, begging for your tears to not fall onto the ground. 

“You say that, [Name], and then run from everything that requires commitment,” he says sharply. 

“You’re a coward, [Name]. You’re hurting me.” 

Hanamaki is stepped away from you know and he starts walking away. 

“My life has no meaning anymore-”

You scoff, “Takihiro your love for me isn’t worth your life!” 

Hanamaki walks away and his voice is racked with sobs. Oh god he seriously does love you. 

Why? 

“Takihiro come back here!” 

You’re running towards him now, grabbing his arm but he pushes away. 

“Takihiro think with your brain! Just because we can’t be together the way you want doesn’t mean we have to sever all ties!” You say breathlessly. 

“I mean think about it, we could have never worked. You hate the fact I don’t eat your favorite ice cream, you constantly like to go out and I like staying home.” 

“I don’t care-” 

“I hate meeting your other family members because they look down on me, my family members have always been skeptical of you-” 

“I don’t care about that-” 

“And we would be miserable, Takihiro. Absolutely miserable with one another-” 

“No we wouldn’t,” he says stopping and grabbing your arm. Your noses were touching as his thin lips tried to connect with yours.

You pull away. 

“Admit it Makki. We are better off as friends, not lovers,” you say finally. 

“I’m ugly and I don’t care about my appearance like your other lovers do. I’m brutally honest with you and sometimes you cry about my opinion and-” 

“I love you [Name].” 

“I’m lazy and have no real goal in life, I have no foundation no, no rock or something. I don’t have a drive, Hiro! You’re going to be stuck with someone who doesn’t care.” 

“I love you.” 

“And you’re going to find someone else, a nice person, who likes eating your ice cream and dresses up. Who has a clear goal in life and someone your family will love-” 

“No one could ever replace you, [Name]-” 

You throw your hands up in frustration, “You’re mixing platonic and romantic feelings together and turning it into some big thing!” 

“No, I’m not.” 

“Yes you are.” 

Silence surpasses you again and Hanamaki starts walking away. 

You spoke up, “But-” 

He turns around again and looks at you with hope. Hope for something more. 

“That I don’t think I’ll ever be with someone romantically, Makki. I’ve gone years without.” 

Hanamaki scoffs and starts to laugh cruelly, 

“I don’t believe that, [Name]. You’re going to find someone, and you’re going to fall hard.” 

You sneer, “How do you know?” 

“I just do, you’re impossible to not fall in love with. You’re the sunshine in my life.” 

“Takihiro don’t say that, please.” 

He looks back at you, “But you are! You are my world, my-” 

“LEAVE ME! OH MY GOD LEAVE ME!” You yell at him and turn away. 

This was the 1st time Hanamaki hears you with that voice. 

"[Name]-"

"JUST GO PLEASE-"

"YOU WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE [NAME]!” 

You spit out your words, “OH REALLY YOU THINK I WILL? ME? THE PERSON WHO TURNED YOU DOWN?!” 

“YES! YES [NAME],” Hanamaki says. 

“You’re going to fall in love with someone and you’re perfect, care free life will turn upside down and they’re going to love you. And you’re going to be perfect with each other-” 

“HANAMAKI-” 

“And I will watch. I will watch you grow and love this person. I will watch it happen because I still love you and I don’t think I’ll love anyone else.” 

“And I will watch you, I will watch you [Name], and- and,” 

You couldn’t bear to see his tears fall from his eyes, so you turn away. 

“I will imagine that it could have been me and you-”

“Hanamaki please-” 

“I don’t know what to do with myself but I will still take care of you and I truly love you, forever and-” 

“Hanamaki-” 

“I won’t ever stop, [Name]. Ever,” he says softly as he tries to reach out for your hand. 

You pull away, your voice breaking. 

“Hanamaki, go. I don’t want to see you right now,” you say softly. 

You don’t have to turn around to see him crumble. You can feel it. 

Because your heart was crumbling too. 

“I’ll go... get back safe, [Name],” he adds. 

You don’t say anything back, and hear the slow movements in the grass as your best friend walked away from you. 

Forever. 

The sky is dark, the stars seemed ashamed at your argument, and they don’t shine like they used to from years before. 

You stayed in the grass, silent tears on your face as you shielded yourself from the cold with your arms. 

You wanted to go home, but home wasn’t a place

It was a person. And his name was Hanamaki Takihiro. 

But home loved you, and you didn’t love it back the way they wanted. 

More tears flowed from your eyes at the sudden thought emerged from your eyes. 

You had no home anymore. 

AN: Another random little oneshot I did for my boy Hanamaki! Please comment your thoughts or reblog and like! I need constructive critiscm loves so I know what I can write and appeal to! 

Taglist: @saladskittles​

[aknymph]

Excruciating

A Black Which Chronicles Story

A/N: This takes place during The Shadow Wand, so if you haven’t read that, please don’t spoil yourself!! —-This takes place after the escape from Grey Manor while on the run and taking shelter for the night.

Characters belong to Laurie Forest. Beginning italics all belong to Laurie Forest and are quoted directly from the text to set the scene.

**Warnings: NSFW, mature content, smut

Characters: Elloren Gardner + Lukas Grey 

My heartbeat ratchets up as I face the full horror of the situation head on.

“I’m scared, Lukas,” I confess, my voice growing hoarse as my magic slams against his shield with riotous force. “I can’t control it. I can’t control the magic in me.”

A look of deep concern flashes over Lukas’ features as he holds onto me, the line of his jaw hardening. In one decided movement, he closes the distance between us, pulls me in, and brings his mouth to mine, blasting fire straight through my lines. I gasp against him as Lukas’ magic blazes through me, staggeringly hot and strong, his fingers threading through my hair, then clenching tight, keeping my mouth firmly against his. 

The full strength of his affinities flashes through me, feeding into my violently out-of-control power with scorching heat, melding with it, then reigning it tightly in, rapidly restoring the shield. I cling to Lukas as he kisses me deeply, and his magic seers through me in a fierce, contained inferno. Wave after wave of blisteringly hot magic, burning away my fear as the heady sense of his controlled power keeps rushing in to take hold of my own. Then Lukas draws back, his green eyes blazing. I’m thrumming with magic now. My breathing uneven and my skin feverishly hot, every part of me lit up by our combined power. But with Lukas’ control now coursing over and through my lines, my magic is no longer chaotic and fitful. It’s reigned in and deadly. 

Lukas’ mouth lifts into a half smile as he moves back a fraction and reaches up to gently caress my check with his hot palm. 

“That’s better.”

I swallow, flushed and overwhelmed by the strength of our combined power and desperate to maintain control over it so that Vogel won’t find me.

“I need your power to survive this,” I say, coming to a full reckoning.

“You won’t always,” Lukas firmly counters, “not after you have some control over your own magic, and Elloren, you will gain control over it. But you need to get hold of your emotions and fast. Once we’re out of the realm, I’ll teach you how to control your power and shield yourself. It’s complicated magery, but we’ll work through it. I’ll teach you every last thing I know about magic.”

I nod stiffly at this, and force myself to breathe evenly as Lukas’ thumb strokes my shoulder, a line of sparks chasing his warm caress. I hold his stare, his eyes set tight on me in the deep red light.

“Elloren, you’re stronger than you think,” he insists, adamant. “I’m sure of it. I always have been. Even though you don’t think you’re equal to this, you are.” 

I want to believe him. I want to be strong enough to face this and fight back, and Lukas’ unwavering faith in me fortifies a small piece of my battered courage. He’s never cottled me, even though sometimes I’ve hated him for it. But he’s always believed in me.

“Sometimes I feel like you understand me better than anyone else,” I confess, “better than I understand myself.

His lips lift with a slight trace of amusement. “That’s because I do understand you better than anyone else. Elloren, our affinities are a perfect match. I know you inside and out, as I suspect you know me. And I can read your emotions in your fire.”

I nod, the prickling flush heating my neck as affection for Lukas warms my lines.

“It’s more than that.”

“I know it is,”he agrees, a rakish glint in his eyes. “We’re both rebels from the same background.”

Gardnerians. Born into the same oppressive culture, both of us forced to wrestle with the same lies, and myths, and religious structures.

“That’s part of it,” I agree. “But it’s more than that too, Lukas.”

Something deep, with import, flashes in Lukas’ gaze, the silence between us growing emotional and charged.

“I know,” he admits.

“You help me to be strong.”

Lukas shakes his head, his brow creasing. “No, we help each other be strong.”

His sentiment is so kind and so heartfelt that my warm affection strikes into a blaze, and I yearn in that moment for a way to bring down the wall of grief around my heart, even though I know that the wall may never fully come down. I loved Yvan with everything in me, and I might never recover from his loss, but I can feel my battered heart opening up a small space for Lukas. And I realize, in that moment, that a heart is a thing not so easily destroyed by the shadows.

“I want you to kiss me,” I tell Lukas, yearning to fill up that space in my heart with him and his fire, and keep hold of him there. Wanting to drive back the shadows. Lukas gives me an impassioned look.

“Elloren, I’ll kiss you all night if you want me to.”

The ache to be close to him ignites and quickly fires up to a blaze.

“Did you bring the shonjere root?” I ask throatily, my heartbeat deepening.

The question flickers on the air between us, as if writ in flame, our magic giving an insistent pull toward each other. Lukas breathes out a sound of disbelief as he gives me a heated, significant look. Then he reaches into his tunic’s pocket, draws out the vile, and hands it to me. The vile’s glass catches the crimson lantern light as I unstopper it, pull out a tendril of the root, and place it in my mouth. Lukas’ gaze turns molten as I chew the root and swallow. We stare at each other for a long moment as heat flares in the air between us. Then Lukas draws me into an embrace, his lips grazing my ear.

“Are you sure, Elloren?”

“I’m sure,” I say, as our magic weaves together, and every inch between us sparks with heat. “I want to,” I tell him, certain. “And we’re stronger together.”

“For the good of the realms, then?” Lukas purrs, his deep voice thrumming straight through me, along with a shimmering flash of his power.

“For the good of the realms,” I agree, surrendering to the pull as our affinities spiral around each other. 

Lukas brings his mouth to mine and it sends a heated charge through us both.  As thunder cracks, our magic fuses, and the hold world catches fire.

I quickly forget the world outside the shelter Lukas has constructed for us, longing only to be present in this moment with him. I knew we had to seal the fasting, but I honestly hadn’t expected to want Lukas again, not in this way, yet I do not hesitate.

Lukas begins trailing his mouth down my neck, and I tilt my head up for him. I feel the joy my small response sends through him, a shimmer of amusement flowing through my lines. I realize then that just as he can sense my emotions, I can sense his.

“Lukas?” my question is breathy. I’ve already surrendered to the fire between us. Lukas hums out his acknowledgement of my question, clearly not wanting to remove his lips from my skin.

“Can all fast mates feel each other’s emotions through their affinities?” Lukas pulls back for a moment and looks at me, still processing my question.

“I…I’m not sure, but I think if it was common, it’s something that would be talked about.” His mouth quirks up in a sultry smile then, “I told you, Elloren, you and I are unique.”

That gives me pause. There is still so much to explore between us, and I’m only starting to realize that I want to explore it. That realization emboldens me. 

Lukas must sense the shift in me, in my magic, because he pulls back slightly and raises an eyebrow in question. I smirk.

“Why Mage Grey, it seems you’re wearing entirely too much clothing. Perhaps I could help you remedy this?”

Lukas’ fire flashes in a sudden surge, the only encouragement I need.

“Why yes, Mage Grey,” he responds, “I think I’d quite appreciate your help in this matter.”

I bring my hands up to the collar of his tunic, allowing my fingers to barely skim his neck as I do, before trailing them down his chest. Lukas is lean, and even his fitted military tunics don’t truly show the shape of him, so I relish in the feel of his muscles beneath my palms, even with his clothing between us. I look up to search his eyes, and find he’s watching me, so I hold his gaze as I slide my hands to the edge of his tunic.

“Arms up, Mage Grey.” My voice comes out in a breathy whisper, and I’m almost embarrassed until I hear the near growl that leaves his throat as Lukas lifts his arms to comply. 

I’d noticed his lean, muscular body our first night together, of course I had, but I’d also felt nervous, and unsure, and well, self-conscious. But Lukas had done so much to assuage those feelings, so I wanted to move slowly this time, to savour him like he’d savoured me.

I toss his tunic aside and take him in. I bring my hands to his now bare arms and run them up to his shoulders, appreciating the flexing of his muscles under my palms as I do. I’m not looking him in the eyes anymore. No, I want to look at his body, and I am his fast mate, so I do, knowing he won’t mind my open gawking. He’s not self-conscious of his body like I am. I lift my palms from his skin, and begin trailing just my fingertips across his skin, then over a faint scar on his chest.

“Elloren,” he grinds out, tilting his head up, a flash of his heat spurring through me. I don’t look at him.

“There’s still so much we don’t know about each other.” 

Lukas freezes at my words. It’s clear he’s misunderstood me, so I continue my left hand on it’s path down his torso as my right lingers along the thin scar. “Like this scar, for instance. How did you get it?” 

“Sparring,” he says, barely audible as he brings his forehead to mine, “during my military apprenticeship.”

“But you could have had it healed.” It’s almost a question.

“Yes, but I wanted a reminder to never let myself be bested again.”

“You let yourself be bested?” The surprise is clear in my tone.

“Later, Elloren, I will tell you every single thing you want to know about me. Later.”

I pull my head back just far enough to smirk at him, a glimmer of mischief traveling through me. “Commander Grey?” His eyes spark in response, and he plays along.

“Yes, Mage Grey?”

“What is it you’d like, Commander Grey?” My saccharine tone a bit overdone, but mischief still lights my eyes.

Lukas looks me up and down. “ For you to finish divesting me of my clothing, so I can return the favor, fast mate.”

“As you wish, Commander Grey.”

Lukas twines his fingers into my hair as I replace the fingers still on his scar with my lips. His shutter at my touch spurs me on, my fingers skimming across his abdomen, my lips following in their wake. 

I hadn’t realized that he’d been holding back his fire until my lips brush his hip bone, near the band of his pants and I feel his fire rush into me, pulling a gasp from me.

“Lukas.”

I look to him then, hooded eyes meeting mine, fire meeting fire, as I slide my hands to the clasp of his pants, unfasten it, and begin to slide them down, my hands and lips again trailing down. When his pants pool at his ankles, Lukas deftly steps from them, leaving him in only his briefs. One of his hands slides from my hair to cup my chin, tilting it so I met his eyes yet again.

“My turn, Elloren.”

“But-” I begin to interrupt him, but he shakes his head and extends a hand to me. I take it, rising from my knees, barely having time to get my footing before he is on me– arms wrapping tightly around my waist– and kissing me fiercely. 

“Tease,” he says lightly, amusement dancing in his eyes.

An indignant snort slips from me before I can contain it. 

“You’re my fast mate. Why shouldn’t I take the time to appreciate your body?” I speak with more bravado than I feel, which I’m sure Lukas can see, but doesn’t comment on.

“Oh, my dear, dear Elloren, there will be plenty of time for that, but now it’s time for me to appreciate yours.”

Before I can process his movements, my tunic joins his on the floor, my pants following soon after. For the second time in only a few days, I stand before him in my camisole and pantalets, Luaks seeming to marvel at the sight. 

The sudden shift in the air confuses me, and I step to him, hand outstretched. His eyes are closed.

“Lukas? Look at me, Lukas.” He doesn’t.

“I..I never thought you would choose to be with me…like this.” It’s a whisper of a confession, barely audible above the rain outside. The raw vulnerability renders me speechless, so I tug on his face, bringing his lips to mine, and sending the words down my lines to burrow into his. I am yours, Lukas. I am here, and I am yours. Just as you are mine.

Lukas gasps as my earth lines wrap around his, twining me with him, delivering the words I can’t yet say, then he lifts me into his arms. I immediately wrap my legs around him as he braces himself and lowers us to the ground. 

The look in his eyes is feral, likely matching the look in my own eyes, as he kneels between my legs and begins dusting my body with kisses.

“My dear, sweet Elloren,” he said, punctuating each word with a kiss to my skin. First to the bottom of my foot, then my ankle, then my calf, and then my thigh. 

He slid my leg over his shoulder and returned to his task. 

“How long…” a kiss to the inside of my knee, “I have waited…” the inside of my thigh, “for you to want me.” He lowers my leg back to the floor and takes me in, the panting, shaking mess I have become at has touch.

“Excruciating.”

I let out a soft chuckle at this. “You think me excruciating? Is this how you’ve wooed all the girls, Commander Grey?”

Lukas looks a bit flustered at my amusement, then rolls his eyes.

“Laugh if you must, Elloren, but you are– excruciating in your beauty–, and kneeling here with you splayed before me feels like a dream.”

His words sober me as I feel his pain flicker through our bond, the rejection he felt at our initial fasting ceremony as I was literally restrained and forcibly fasted to him. 

“Oh, Lukas,” I entone, leaning up and encircling my arms around his neck. “I’m sorry for that, Lukas. I’m sorry for all of that. I’ve never deserved your unfailing loyalty, but I vow to strive to.” This feels right, the offering of my own vow to him. A single tear trails down his cheek as he nods his head.

Our moods shift so frequently when we’re together, always allowing our sincere emotions to creep through whatever masks we try to maintain, and though our words have turned serious, I can still feel the heat between us, and I desperately want to show him that I mean it, that I want this, want us, so I wrap one ankle around his waist, and pull him down on top of me into a searing kiss.

Lukas senses what I want to show him, of course he does, and deepens the kiss, pressing himself firmly against me while his deft fingers move to unbutton my camisole. He pulls his lips from mine and kisses my nose, my forehead, my temple, making his way down to my jaw. I turn my head for him and let out a breathy moan as he kisses up my neck to my ear. He nips at the lobe just as his hand skims up my abdomen to my bare breast and I wrap my other leg around his waist, only to feel his hardness now pressed between my thighs. 

Thin cloth still separates us, but I instinctually roll my hips in response to the feel him. He groans, as if I’m somehow punishing him, and his mouth moves from my ear to the breast left free of his hand and he sucks it in.

My back arches up to push myself into him and I grip his hair, keeping his mouth forced against me. I feel the vibration of his low chuckle against the flesh of my now tender breast as he pulls slightly away from me. I meet his eyes, trying to keep the disappointment from my face that his mouth is not still occupied.

“Your responsiveness to my mouth is quite…” he takes a shaky breath, “encouraging.”

Words seem to have truly left me now, so I arch my body toward him again, and send a needy burst of my earth affinity into him, trying to convey with both what I want from him. He wraps his arms around my back, pulling me to him and flicks the nipple of my other breast with his tongue. This time both my hands grip his hair and force his mouth onto me. A moan escapes him in response.

I’m now in his lap, him still on his knees, and I release one of my legs to wrap lower around him, steadying myself so I can again rock against him. He pulls one hand from around me and slides it between us, dipping it below the waist of my pantalettes and strokes through my folds. We both groan this time, and I pull my hands away from him to grasp my waistband and tug downward. He releases me and I slide the few inches to the floor, making quick work of the last bit of physical barrier I hold. I know my emotional walls are still up, that I am merely letting him into one corner of my heart, but I will give him what I can now, with the hope that I will one day fully break down this barrier between us that is shielding my broken, still grieving heart. 

Lukas too makes quick work of his briefs and pulls me back onto his lap. I’m desperate to have him inside me and I throw out a flood of flame to convey my desire, letting wave after wave of it sweep through him.

“Patience, Elloren,” Lukas tells me between gasps of air, between searing kisses. “Your body is still new to this.” 

“You felt my wetness, Lukas,” I chide him. “Inside, please.”

It seems that’s enough to break his resolve as he again lays us down and claps our fingers together before slowly sliding himself into me, a contented sigh escaping my lips. It’s so glorious, this way we fit together. Our affinity lines twining as succinctly as our bodies do.

Lukas is kissing me again, now in time with his thrusts. My breasts, my collar bone, my neck, my ear, my mouth. I slide my tongue into his mouth, wanting to join every part of us possible. 

This spurs him on and he releases one of my hands to grasp my breast, and my now free hand wraps behind him, gripping him firmly and pressing him harder into me.

“More,” I grind out, and he moves his hand from my breast to grab his wand, whispering a few words. I realize he’s again summoned tendrils to wrap around my body, using them to touch me where he cannot. He drops his wand and positions his hand between my thighs, softly circling me there. My fire flairs. He hasn’t done this before, and it’s good, so good that I cry out in response.

He’s still moving over me, thrusting in time with the pressure at the apex of my things, my body undulating under the writhe of his shadowy tendrils as he leans up and whispers in my ear.

“Let go, Elloren. Surrender to it. Let go.”

And I do.

My magic shatters around us as my body shudders. Lukas continues, stroking and thrusting throughout, but his breathing grows ragged. I can tell he is trying to hold off for me, trying to coax my body to it’s full pleasure while he holds his own at bay.

“That’s it,” he manages. “Yes, Elloren, yes.” 

My arms wrap around his back to grasp his shoulders as I cry out in ecstasy, “Lukas.”

His name on my lips seems to shatter his resolve as his magic bursts forth and I feel his thrusts stutter to a stop.

He brings his head to mine. “Oh, Elloren.”

“Excruciating?” I ask, I shy smile on my lips.

“Definitely,” he laughs, laying himself beside me and pulling me into his arms.

I burrow my body against his as I feel a contented peace wash over me, radiating from Lukas. Feeling his emotions like this is its own kind of pleasure, and I pull his arms tight around my chest, grasping his hands in mine. 

“Good night, Mage Grey,” I tell him as sleep begins to take hold.

He kisses the top of my head lightly as he responds, “Rest well, Mage Grey.”

And I do, if only for tonight.

[isabelle-spray]

The Easier Way

POV: On the eve of her wedding to Professor Bhaer, Jo March is forced to confront her sexuality...

Laurie was here last night.

He had such a queer look in his face, I knew he had something to say, so I told him; “whatever it is you had better just hurry up and say it quickly, I’m getting married tomorrow and I don’t have time for your stumbling around.”

That seemed to give him quite an affront. And then I began to worry that something dreadful had happened. That Friedrich had been killed in some freak accident, or that Amy had taken sick in the night. Of course, it was no such thing.

“You don’t have to do this, Jo,” He said. I ought to have known.

“Do what?” I asked, knowing perfectly well what he meant.

“This! All of this!” He gestured wildly to my bridal gown which was hanging in the window, and the flowers on the dresser. He always was so dramatic.

“You’re referring to my marrying Friedrich, I presume?” I could feel my pulse racing in my ears.

“No,” he said. “No. Not just Friedrich. I mean your marrying any man. You may not wish to hear this from me, but somebody has to tell you before you go ahead and make the worst kind of mistake - -”

Up until that point I had been attempting to hold my tongue, but at that I had heard enough.

“A mistake?!” I cried. “So this is what you truly think of him?! How dare you - after everything - come in here and - and - you are wedded to my sister Laurie. Amy! I thought we had settled this years ago. Or have you forgotten? And now you come back in here and presume to tell me that you know what is best for me, for my life, thinking only of your own selfish and insufferable desires - -“

He took a long exhale before beginning his next petition.

“I did not come here thinking in any way of my own wants or desires. Nor do I seek to prescribe what is best for you. You always have known your own mind far too well to allow for that. But that is just it, don’t you see? If you marry him, you will be forfeiting that which you love most dearly, Jo. Your freedom.”

“If you think I would ever commit myself to a man who did not respect me then I’m afraid you are gravely mistaken. I have chosen to marry Friedrich precisely because he is quite the opposite sort of gentleman. A true gentleman. He holds me in the very highest regard, and views me to be his equal in all things. So there. What say you to that?!”

He was pacing up and down in front of the fireplace, scowling and balling up his fists. (How he ever believed we might ever have been happy together is truly beyond me.)

“You do not listen.” He said through gritted teeth. “I take no issue with Mr Bhaer. None whatsoever. I think him to be a perfectly genteel, admirable sort of a man. But that is the issue. He is a man. And for that reason I am convinced he could never make you happy. In fact, I am certain that no man ever could. I tried to love you, Jo, but it was not right and we both knew it. Now I see you are attempting to love him. But it is all a fiction. You are constructing your love for him as you do the characters in your stories. But this is not a story, Jo, this is your own real life.”

He raised his voice in this last ejaculation, which was quite unexpected. I sat silently for several moments, caught between rage and confusion.

“When I look at you Jo, I do not see a woman as she ought to be on the eve of her wedding day, blooming and blushing in the Spring of her romance. Instead, I see a tired woman who has given way to the burden of expectation. You have given up, Jo. It is all a lie! And tomorrow it will be a lie before God. The worst kind.”

And then the strangest thing happened. I suddenly found that I was crying. Great big lurching sobs. And I hadn’t the faintest idea why.

Marrying Friedrich was what I wanted. I knew that. It was true that as a girl I could never comprehend the way Meg and Amy were so desperate to marry, and I had hated the idea that our lives should change. But as I had grown older I had come to see the value of having a husband; that he might bring me comfort and companionship, and a kind of freedom that would never be afforded to me as an unmarried woman. If I continued to live as ‘Jo March’ there would be whole spheres of life to which I could never gain access. I would be always on the outside. But as ‘Mrs Friedrich Bhaer’ I would be afforded respect and consequence. I could make a place for myself in this world. It would be a sacrifice, but Marmee had always taught us that for one's family, sacrifice was necessary. So then I had decided, if I were to marry anyone, I could not think of a man whose soul was more in harmony with my own than Friedrich’s. And he did love me. So, I thought, marrying him must be the right course of action.

But now Laurie was here, drawing out all the old doubts and fears, which he knew would cause me to question myself.

I hated Laurie just then. Truly hated him.

He had come to kneel before me, though he dared not touch me.

“It is not too late,” he said gently. “Call it off. Friedrich will be heartbroken for a time, but he will recover. You, on the other hand, I fear may never.”

I wiped my face on my handkerchief and lifted my gaze to meet his.

“Do not presume to tell me about my choices.” I said, coldly. “You know nothing of womanhood, Theodore Lawrence. You know nothing of the sacrifices demanded of our sex, simply to survive in a world that is governed by your kind. You are a man; you may go wherever you please, do whatever you please, with whomever you please. We do not have that luxury. And far from lecturing me on the topic of my freedom, you ought to consider the chains I have been bound by already, my entire life.”

“Things do not always have to be the way you think, Jo.”

“Oh, really? Tell me then, oh wise one. How might things be different? What other choices do I have?”

He looked uncomfortable. But then seemed resolved to say his piece, and began.

“While I was away in Europe, you know I met a great many different kinds of people, and tried a great many new things.”

“Yes - I dread to think the things you tried in Europe...” I said disparagingly, though I could not help but smirk a little.

“Well, there are people who live differently, you know? Men and women who choose not to marry, but instead seek companionship among - well - among their own kind. And they are happy. Just as happy as any man and wife. True it is challenging to live outside of convention, but I believe God created us all to be equal in his eyes, and each of us just the way he desired us to be.”

I had never heard Laurie speak of such things. I regarded him carefully, searching for any trace of mockery among his features, but found none.

“I thought for a time I might even be content living that way myself, you know. I met a gentleman in Denmark. I resided with him for several months. And truly, I was very happy. But eventually we quarrelled over some silly thing, I let my temper get the better of me and so I left. And then, when I was reunited with your sister, I felt quite sure that my future was by her side. And having had those experiences enabled me to be certain that I myself was not simply giving in to loneliness or expectation. I’ve never spoken of it since, even with my dear Amy, for I do not believe she would understand, but I am entrusting you now Jo, because I think you might. And unlike me, who could be happy either way, living within or without convention, I do not believe you could live in true happiness and fulfillment if you marry Friedrich tomorrow.”

Something inside me was wrenching. The tears were flowing again and I made no attempt to contain them.

“I don’t know how they live, your friends in Europe.” I choaked. “Perhaps they are content with their choices. Perhaps, as you say, that might have been me. But that is another life. And this is my home, Laurie. I cannot leave everyone I love and go gadding about Europe on some hedonistic adventure as you have done. It is as much a fiction as any of my stories.”

“But there are people like that on this side of the Atlantic too, you know? Women of independent means who reside with one another. I even met one such pair while I was visiting with my friend at Harvard last year. They call them ‘Boston Marriages’. Quite fascinating ladies, they were. One was an heiress from France, the other a student of Mathematics. They reminded me so much of you, Jo, I can’t tell you. I’m sure we could make a trip over there and you could meet them and see for yourself…”

I had heard enough. I waited for him to stop talking. Then silently crossed the room, held open the door and waited for him to leave.

“Jo, do not be like this.” He pleaded. “You know it to be the truth. It’s all over your face, plain as day.”

I waited some more, and seeing that I was not to be persuaded, he gave me one last scowl and flounced out in quite a temper.

Only once I had heard the front door slamming did I allow myself to breathe out and collapse onto the sofa in front of the fire.

Laurie’s words had set my thoughts into an unbearable kind of spin. Women in Boston residing with one another, in so-called ‘marriages’. The very idea was unthinkable!

And, yet…

I could not keep it out of my thoughts.

I lay on the sofa in a hopeless state of overwhelm until the fire had burned itself out. Then I just stayed in darkness, watching the coals glowing red and orange, and eventually fell into an uneasy asleep.

I did not awake until this morning, when Amy and Meg shook me saying “goodness Jo, whatever happened here?!”

“We ought never to have left you alone on the night before your nuptials! How awfully neglectful we are…”

“Nevermind that now, time to get up! You need to bathe, and finish your hair, put on your gown...”

The burden that Laurie’s words had left on my heart was too heavy and complex to be communicated to my sisters. As much as I loved them, he was right. It was not a thing they could ever comprehend.

So I just let them sweep me up, into my gown and out the door. It was just... easier that way.

[the-desolated-quill]

Absent Friends - Watchmen blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. if you haven’t read this comic yet, you may want to before reading this review)

At Midnight, All The Agents managed to set the tone with its cynical and biting critique of superheroes, presenting them as being violent felons or worthless failures indulging in power fantasies. The second issue, Absent Friends, sinks its teeth even deeper as we take a look at the Comedian’s past via flashbacks whilst the other characters attend his funeral and pay their respects.

So lets talk about the Comedian.

Aside from the accusations of rape, the first issue didn’t go into too much detail about Edward Blake, other than that no one besides Rorschach seemed to like him very much. This issue goes into much more detail as we see the Comedian at four major points in his history.

The first flashback is that of the Minutemen back in 1940, where we see Eddie try to rape Sally Jupiter, the first Silk Spectre. It’s a very shocking and disturbing scene, not just because of the fact that he’s supposed to be a superhero, but also because of the sheer brutality of the attack. Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons don’t hold back in depicting Comedian’s sickening behaviour, but they also don’t become too indulgent with it. They clearly take no pleasure from depicting this type of sexual violence and there is a legitimate artistic reason why it’s there. Prior to the flashback, we see the two Silk Spectres discuss the Comedian. Laurie is disgusted that Sally would have anything positive to say about Eddie after what he did, but what I find most interesting is a moment during the conversation where Sally shows Laurie a porno comic of her. This, to me, reveals what Moore and Gibbons are getting at here. Namely the role of women in superhero comics.

Female superheroes have always been something of a paradox. They need to be strong and independent, but not too strong and independent. We can’t have Wonder Woman upstaging Superman, now can we? Oh and of course they need to look sexy. Long hair flowing. Plenty of bare flesh showing. Tight leather outfits. High heels. Makeup. Never mind the fact that this getup is not remotely practical or appropriate to fight crime in. 

While this sexist attitude is slowly and thankfully fading away from modern comics, historically there has always been this kind of seediness to how women are presented in comics. They’re not there to empower women. They’re there to appeal to the male gaze. Sexy athletic women with massive boobs beating the shit out of baddies. They are, for lack of a better term, sex objects. Watchmen takes this to its extreme, presenting both Silk Spectres as being incredibly sexualised to the point where some characters, like the Comedian and the pornographer who made the comic, perceive them as being little more than sex objects. Not only that, but Sally and Laurie’s different perspectives on this sexualisation reflects the changing attitudes about women in comics at the time. Sally accepts the porno comics and the attempted rape as par for the course. The reality of being a woman. She even chose her costume herself in order to draw attention to herself in the hopes of jump-starting a modelling career. Laurie meanwhile didn’t choose the sexualised image that has been thrust onto her and is very vocal in her distaste toward how she’s perceived and how her mother is willing to brush it aside. People often have a tendency to write off Silk Spectre as being the weak link, but I don’t think that’s fair. There’s a lot going on with this character and in our current age of MeToo and social media empowering women to open up about their experiences, she’s a character that has become more and more relevant as time goes on.

The second flashback depicts Captain Metropolis trying to recruit the main characters into ‘the Crime Busters,’ only for the Comedian to ruin it with his nihilistic attitude. This mainly serves as a takedown of superhero crossovers like Justice League and the Avengers. Rorschach even comments on it, saying it feels more like a publicity stunt. It also serves as subtle foreshadowing for Ozymandias’ plan, but we’ll come to that in a future blog. But most importantly, it displays the Comedian’s changing attitude towards crime fighting. When he was with the Minutemen, he was happy to indulge in his own violent fantasies by beating up criminals, but now he’s become aware of how pointless it all is due to the Cold War. Capes and masks are useless against the nukes.

The next flashback depicts the Comedian and Doctor Manhattan fighting (and winning) the Vietnam War. This is probably my least favourite of the flashbacks and it’s because of Eddie killing a Vietnamese woman he had impregnated months earlier. Whereas the attempted rape of Sally felt thematically justified, the murder of a pregnant woman just felt like shock for the sake of shock and doesn’t really serve a purpose other than to reinforce the fact that the Comedian is a horrible human being. But it does raise an important issue. Superheroes and patriotism.

America has a few superheroes associated with it. Superman. Spider-Man. Captain America. But very rarely do comics explore the impact a superhero would have on a country’s political standing in the world. Having a superhuman associated with your country could tip the scales greatly in your favour, which is exactly what happens in Watchmen. Thanks to Doctor Manhattan and the Comedian, America is able to win the Vietnam War, turning it into the fifty first state. The United States is much more powerful than any country on Earth thanks to the likes of Manhattan, which is what has escalated the Cold War because the Russians are running scared of the threat America poses.

Morally speaking, any superhero who truly believes in justice and heroism should ideally be completely impartial. Siding with one country over another could seriously compromise the hero. But how, you might be tempted to ask. A superhero serving his country doesn’t sound so bad, right? Except there’s a world of difference between fighting for moral good and fighting for your country. This isn’t the same as stopping a mugger and giving an old lady her purse back. In war, good and evil isn’t so clearly defined. So by sending a superhero into a war zone, you’re effectively demonising a whole nation of people. Because the side with the hero must be good and the side fighting the hero must be bad, right? It imposes a black and white mentality onto a situation that is, to put it mildly, incredibly messy.

Another problem with having superheroes in the army (or any form of law enforcement) is that superheroes are a law unto themselves. They exist outside the chain of command. While, yes, the police and the military are both deeply flawed institutions, there are laws and safeguards that (in theory) prevent officers from abusing their power. Superheroes don’t have that. So with no one holding them to account, there’s nothing to stop them from going too far, as we see the Comedian do many times.

Which brings us to the fourth flashback. The police strike of 1977 where we see the Comedian and Nite Owl try to stop the riots and we hear about congress pushing through the Keene Act to outlaw superheroes.

Like Rorschach, the Comedian is also based on a Charlton Comics character. The Peacemaker. A militaristic superhero who believes heavily in pacifism and wishes to bring peace to the world.... through violence.

Yeah, I don’t get it either. But honestly, it feels like Moore and Gibbons are using the Comedian to take the piss out of Peacemaker. He’s a ‘superhero’ and yet we see him fire rubber bullets and tear gas at a crowd of people, murder a pregnant woman and try to rape someone. It’s as if they’re saying that it’s impossible to be both a hero and violent. We have a romanticised view of superheroes fighting crime, but where do we draw the line? Why is the rape of a woman unacceptable, but the beating of a criminal okay? Is it because the criminal is quote/unquote ‘evil?’ So are we saying that a criminal’s life is worthless the minute they break the law? If that’s the case, then the conversation has turned away from superheroes and toward fascism.

Many people describe the Comedian as a nihilist, which is true, but what a lot of people fail to recognise is that all the characters are technically nihilists. They all believe the world has no morality or meaning, but whereas the other characters of Watchmen impose their own personal morality onto the world, the Comedian does the opposite. He embraces the chaos and amorality of the world around him and uses his superhero identity to indulge in sex and violence. It’s what makes the smiley face logo so appropriate for the Comedian. Like the smiley face, superheroes are supposed to represent all that is good and just about this world. But just as the blood stain taints the smiley face, violence and corruption taints the image of the superhero.

The issue ends with Rorschach breaking into the cemetery to pay his respects and his final monologue I think perfectly sums up the despicable, but fascinating nature of the Comedian. In his journal, he tells the joke about Pagliacci, a clown whose act is recommended by a therapist as a cure for a patient’s depression. Except the patient in question is Pagliacci. 

What hope does America have when the superhero that’s meant to save them is just as corrupt and amoral as them?

[x5red]

Sixty fun & fascinating facts about the classic Supergirl (4 / 4)

At last, the final fifteen fun facts in a series to mark the sixtieth anniversary of Kara Zor-El’s debut in DC Comics. This is the last batch of Supergirl info-nuggets, bringing the trivia total up to sixty, one for each year since her introduction.

As before, each snippet of data relates to the original Supergirl, the intrepid Argo City teen who leapt from that crumpled Midvale rocket ship. Covering her original Silver and Bronze Age incarnation, in comics and on screen, each factoid is calculated to intrigue and delight – hopefully even seasoned Kara fans will find a few morsels of trivia that had previously escaped their attention.

So, one last time: enjoy…

46. At one point she was blacklisted from being mentioned in DC publications.

In 1985 to mark its 50th comicbook publishing anniversary DC Comics launched a mini-series, Crisis on Infinite Earths, that sought to rejig its entire fictional universe to better address the new, more mature, direct sales audience. Childish elements were removed and iconic characters rebooted. Superman was to be recast as the only survivor of Krypton, meaning Supergirl not only had to die but be erased from all past events too. DC, however, decided that erasing Kara from fictional history was simple not cruel enough -- in a move straight out of a George Orwell novel DC airbrushed her from in-real-life history too.

Supergirl became she who shall not be named, seemingly banned from being mentioned, even in the editorial pages. When DC couldn’t avoid using her name, as happened in Secret Origins #42 (July 1989) when discussing Phantom Girl’s first appearance, they masked it with asterisks like an expletive -- ”S*P*RG*RL”. DC even went as far as to exclude Kara from a bio of writer Paul Kupperberg in the pages of Power Girl #2 (July 1988), despite Kupperberg‘s long tenure as Supergirl’s chief writer, and Power Girl being a parallel-universe re-imagining of Kara. Yet the Maid of Might remained popular with at least some DC staffers, as Alan Brennert proved when Kara made a highly unauthorised crafty cameo in his Deadman story inside Christmas with the Super-Heroes #2 (1989) -- Brennert only avoided censorship thanks to DC editor-in-chief Dick Giordano volunteering himself to do the story’s artwork.

47. Prior to her role as Supergirl, Helen Slater had struggled with eating disorders.

In an obscure 1988 interview for UK tv with psychologist Oliver James, Helen Slater talked frankly about how winning the role of Supergirl helped in her ongoing battle with Anorexia and Bulimia. Asked about the cause of the conditions, “Control was one part of it”, Slater admitted, adding, “I think Bulimia especially, which I did suffer from from 13 [...] is a lot to do with not having a safe space to express anger.” She went on to credit her Supergirl fitness trainer, Alf Joint (“the most beautiful man in the world”) with overcoming some of her fears around food by using Chocolate Brazils (chocolate dipped nuts) as positive reinforcement after a hard training session.

48. She celebrated her 75th birthday in 2018.

It is generally accepted that Kara Zor-El’s birthday, when using the Gregorian calendar on Earth, is 22nd September. That date comes from a reply to a reader’s letter published in Adventure Comics #389 (Feb 1970), but said reply didn’t give the year of Kara’s birth, meaning readers couldn’t work out Kara’s age. (“One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age”, wrote Oscar Wilde, ”A woman who would do that would tell anything.”) Fortunately a little bit of detective work means that fans can work it out. A story in Action Comics #305 (Oct 1963) gives the date of Kara’s arrival on Earth as 18th May 1959, and both the Daring New Adventures of Supergirl #1 (Nov 1982) and Action Comics #270 (Nov 1960) suggest that Kara was 15 years old when she landed. This means that she was born in 1943. So, as of her most recent birthday at the time of writing (22nd September 2018), she would require 75 candles on her birthday cake. Good thing she has Kryptonian super-lungs..!

49. Her nickname was Hot Dog.

Every fan knows that Kara Zor-El is Supergirl, and that Supergirl is Linda Lee Danvers, but how many fans know that Linda Lee Danvers was also... “Hot Dog”..?!?!!

Yup, that was her name when she was dating Philip Decker, music conductor and part-time lecturer at Lake Shore University, Chicago. The pair’s romance had blossomed in the pages of Supergirl Vol. 2 thanks to a shared love of Jazz music, and they spent an increasing amount of time together in each other’s apartments. It was during one such session of intense snuggling that Philip let slip his nickname for Linda: “Hot Dog”, a name what was met with uncontrollable giggles from Linda.

50. Her makeup bag hid a couple of super secrets.

Of course, if you’re one of the world’s greatest superheroes it is important to look your best when saving the world, but Kara’s beauty kit not only helped keep her looking immaculate while fighting injustice, but also concealed a couple of tricks to keep her dual identity a secret too. In Action Comics #270 (Nov 1960) Kara celebrated her sixteenth birthday. Her gift from the Man of Steel was an innocent looking lipstick which, in reality, hid a secret compartment to stash her super-compressed costume. “If you ever have to conceal your costume quickly, or remove it to go swimming...”, explains Superman (perhaps anticipating other activities that a young woman might get up to that could require stripping off clothing.)

Years later, in Supergirl Vol. 2 #17 (Mar 1984), Kara added more secrets to her makeup bag when she finally decided to ditch her brunette Linda Danvers wig. She still needed a way to switch from Supergirl’s flowing blonde locks to Linda’s brunette bob, of course, and the alternative she devised was a special energized comb that reacted with colour-sensitive molecules to instantly transform her hair’s style and colour. Clever stuff..!

51. She and Brainiac 5 weren’t really an item.

Despite now being firmly romantically linked in the eyes of many comic fans, Brainiac 5 and Supergirl’s relationship only really became serious during the 1990s Earth Angel era. Back in the Silver Age, when the pair first met in Action Comics #276 (Apr 1961), Kara was initially weary of Brainy, recognising his family resemblance to Superman’s arch foe. Her attitude softened, however, as the story unfolded, even calling him “sweet” by its close. As the years rolled by Brainy is clearly smitten by Kara, but she rarely reciprocated his affections. Finally, in Legion of Super-Heroes Vol. 2 #294 (Dec 1982), Brainy brings matters to a close: “You remember that crush I had on you? [...] I think I’ve finally worked it out of my system.”. In response Kara teases, “Really? What a shame. Here I was, starting to think how cute you were.” (Needless to say, Brainy is left dumbfounded as Kara promptly flies off.)

Kara dated numerous men during the Silver and Bronze Age, including long-term relationships with Dick Malverne and Philip Decker, but these were generally in her Linda Danvers identity. Brainy is the closest thing “Supergirl” came to a boyfriend -- perhaps that’s why some fans like to focus more on him rather than Linda’s beaus.

52. She was a fan of The Bionic Woman.

One of the problems of being a superhero is that your evenings are often taken up saving the world, leaving little time to catch up with popular tv shows. But on her odd evenings off-duty, what was likely to be on the Maid of Might’s tv screen? Unsurprisingly, Kara seems to have been a fan of superheroine shows, as demonstrated by comments in Superman Family #184 (July 1977) while she was battling an unnaturally fierce electrical storm in the skies over Santa Augusta. “Great way to spend an evening out”, complains a frustrated Girl of Steel, “If this storm doesn’t let up, I’ll miss ‘The Bionic Woman--!’”

53. She was a big fan of seat belts and personal computers, apparently.

Being a superhero doesn’t pay very much, if anything at all. That’s why DC Comics always liked to line up product endorsements for its big stars, and the Girl of Steel was no exception. Supergirl’s first apparent appearance in adverts (outside of selling DC’s own magazines) was in a late 70s commercial for kid’s underwear, but pretty soon DC had secured more prestigious work for Kara when in 1981 they had her extol the virtues of Tandy’s new line of 8 bit micro computers. More important work came in the mid-80s, when Kara teamed up with Honda and the US Department of Transportation to promote the adoption of car seat belts. The Maid of Might appeared in two full-length give-away comics (and on-screen Helen Slater even appeared as Supergirl in a tv advert.) Kara was so committed to the cause of road safety that she even did the second give-away comic after her death in Crisis on Infinite Earths -- now that’s dedication for you..!

54. Only one woman worked on her comic-strip during the entire Silver and Bronze age.

It is a sad reflection of the industry in the 60s and 70s that if one totals up all the writers, artists, and editors, who worked on the Supergirl strip during the Silver and Bronze Age, there’s only one female name on the list: Dorothy Woolfolk. Editor for Supergirl Vol. 1 #1 (Nov 1972) only -- yup, a single issue -- Dorothy launched the Girl of Steel into her first self-titled comicbook before giving way to industry veteran Robert Kanigher for issue #2. Allegedly a larger-than-life figure, Dorothy was a rare example of DC allowing a woman to work outside of the romance genre during the Golden and Silver Age; she is even credited by some with suggesting the idea of Kryptonite to Superman writer Jerry Siegel.

(Away from Supergirl’s own strip, two other women briefly worked as editors on comics featuring the Girl of Steel in a guest capacity. Karen Berger and Laurie Sutton both edited 1980s Legion of Super-Heroes issues containing Kara cameos.)

55. Her most iconic costume contained a pair of clocks.

The problem with slinky skin-tight superhero costumes is that they don’t leave much room for the practical necessities of life... like pockets... or watches. But that never stopped the Girl of Steel from sneaking a few hidden practical elements into her outfits. Most fans know that the inner lining of her cape hides a secret pocket (where she stashes her everyday clothes when out superhero-ing), but how many fans realised that the three discs aligned over each hip on her iconic 70s hot pants outfit actually acted as a pair of clocks? According to Krypton Chronicles #2 (Oct 1981), by placing three fingers on the discs over her right hip Kara is telepathically informed of the time in New York (her then home), while the same action on her left hip reports the time in Kandor (Krypton’s capital, famously miniaturised in a bottle by Brainiac.)

56. The USA was actually one of the last countries to see the Supergirl movie.

The Girl of Steel may have been able to zip around the world in an instant, but apparently her movie couldn’t. After opening on Thursday 19th July 1984 in the United Kingdom, then days later in Ireland and Japan, the movie slowly made its way around the world, opening in the Philippines, Australia, and Spain during August, and then France and Canada during October. By mid-November, however, American audiences were yet to see the Maid of Might grace cinema screens.

The delay was caused by Warner Bros. withdrawing from its US distribution deal near the end of production, causing producers to scramble for a replacement. Eventually, on Wednesday 21st November -- over four months after the UK debut -- the Supergirl movie hit US cinema theatres thanks to fledgling distributor TriStar Pictures, but with almost 20 minutes of material chopped out. It wasn’t until 1998 that the full international cut was legitimately available in the US thanks to an Anchor Bay VHS video release.

57. She was Wonder Woman’s sister.

Incredible as it may seem, for a brief period Supergirl was Wonder Woman’s sister. The incident happened in Supergirl Vol. 1 #9 (Dec 1973) after Kara finally had enough of being two-timed by boyfriends as Linda Danvers, and hit upon by men as Supergirl. When Kara bravely rescues an Amazon warrior ship under attack by fierce sea creatures, Queen Hippolyta offers to adopt her as a daughter, making Kara the sister of Princess Diana (aka Wonder Woman.) Realising that the Amazon’s island home is free of men, Kara accepts, but a medical emergency forces her back out into the Man’s World to seek the ingredients for a serum. With the emergency over, Kara considers that maybe she was too hasty in turning her back on all men, and leaves her new Amazon home to give them a second chance.

58. She valued her privacy.

When you have as many extraordinary abilities as the Girl of Steel, the usual fears and phobias just don’t apply. Why be afraid of heights when you can fly? Why be afraid of snakes when your skin is not only fang proof, but bullet proof? But Daring New Adventures of Supergirl #4 (Feb 1983) revealed that there’s one thing guaranteed to make Kara Zor-El flee in terror -- fear of having her everyday identity exposed. The issue sees Kara hypnotised into seeing her greatest fear by the villain Ms. Mesmer: as a result Supergirl continually sees her Linda Danvers identity reflected back at her in windows and mirrors. Convinced that everyone can see through her disguise, Kara seeks solace with her adopted parents. It is only thanks to the calming influence of her mother, Edna Danvers, that Kara has the courage to go back out onto the streets as Supergirl to defeat Ms. Mesmer.

59. Her first kiss was with a very hirsute Jimmy Olsen.

The opening season of the Supergirl tv show teased a possible romance between Kara and James Olsen, and in some ways this echos very early Supergirl stories where the pair were occasionally seen as a potential love-match. Indeed Jimmy Olsen was actually Kara’s first kiss, although the event came about in a highly unorthodox way. The pages of Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen #44 (Apr 1960) saw Jimmy transformed into a werewolf, and Superman reasons that the curse can only be lifted by the kiss of a young girl. In steps a fifteen year old Kara Zor-El, who gives the cub reporter a delicate peck on the lips, reversing the spell. A year later Jimmy managed to turn himself into a werewolf for a second time(!) in Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen #52 (Apr 1961), but Kara’s kiss proved ineffective that time.

60. She didn’t entirely die in Crisis on Infinite Earths.

Obviously it is a matter of record that the original Kara Zor-El gave up her life in Crisis on Infinite Earths #7 (Oct 1985) – at least until DC later saw fit to retcon that particular story line – but in their attempts to erase the Maid of Might from existence, DC had forgotten about a rather inconvenient story published just a year before, in Supergirl Vol. 2 #19 (May 1984).

The tale dealt with a Supergirl clone who had assumed the identity of Linda Danvers. The clone had no super powers, but she did have all of Kara’s memories and personality. The story ends with a twist: rather than take the easy way out by having clone-Kara conveniently fall under the wheels of a speeding bus, writer Paul Kupperberg has the two Kara’s work out a deal. ”It’s a big world out there… with plenty of room for two people with this face!“, explains Supergirl, “We can find a place for you… a name of your own…” And with that the two Karas go their separate ways, meaning that although superpowered-Kara may have surrendered her life in Crisis, powerless-Kara (her clone) presumably continued to live out a regular life anonymously somewhere in America.

And that’s it -- all sixty..! Thanks for reading, Hope you enjoyed the series and learned at least a few snippets of trivia along the way that you found amusing or thought-provoking.

Don’t forget to come back in 2048, when it will be time to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the Matrix Supergirl... Or maybe not..!

[emptymanuscript]

Cringe Tag

RULES:

1. Post a quote or short excerpt from your early days of writing. (I’m talking old fanfics, slash fics, original fics, etc., that are barely edited and have a ton of technical errors and misspelled words.) This is the cringe part. Don’t edit anything! Let it be horrendous. Don’t Panic.

2. Post a quote or short excerpt from one of your most recent works/WIPs. Something that you’re proud of. Something that you’ve written that makes you smile when you read it.

3. Tag a writer you admire, anyone who you think is amazing, new friends, followers, writeblrs, anyone who you’d like to know more about. If you think someone is a great writer and you want to see how they’ve developed their skills, tag them! Everyone started somewhere.

I was tagged by @merigreenleaf for this. Sorry I’m late. Ands thanks for the tag.

Well, digging through my computer files, the oldest stuff I’ve got is dated 1992 and it isn’t filed well. I had this idea for a bunch of different stories to interlock and for it somehow to reflect a giant overall plot. It may possibly have been people deducing the existence of gods incarnating themselves. Maybe. I really don’t remember anymore. But it means my oldest stuff has all got the same file name except the number on the end is different. This one, while it supposedly isn’t the earliest, showing a last modified date of June 14th 1995, I am relatively certain is actually the oldest, and that I actually started it in 1991 when I was in 8th grade. 

Here are the first four paragraphs of my oldest piece:

The great hall was made of granite. Evenly spaced along each wall was a stone depiction of a drake's head. Their eyes glowed, flickering because of the candles which sat in thier sockets. The rest of the light in the hall was provided by the torches which sat blackening the roofs of the drakes mouths. The roof was supported by coloums which were made of sculptures of winged serpents. At the front of the hall on a throne of two intertwining drakes, with their wings for it's back and their heads for arm rests, sat a man dressed in red and silver. His brown eyes held barely concealed hatred. His hands gripped the drakes snouts as he listened to the demon before him.

Infront of the throne stood a giant of a man. His eyes were not unlike the eye of a heat storm. Its color twisted and changed in the candlelight. The man drew and raised his sword. About the bottom of the blade were two lions made of silver. In the candle light the lions, whose fangs clasped the edge of the blade, twisted into a mockery of life seemingly attemting to devour the sword. His mane of fire dripped down upon the shoulders of his glittering armor which shone green and white in the candle light. This spectre spoke in a voice that matched the fury of the kings of the jungle.

"I Darius challenge you to a contest to the death! The victor shall be lord over this domain!" He who had entered in the name of peace now declared war. Everything, he wanted it all.

"I accept. Prepare for death!" Lord Ivan, tall and majestic, rose and swept out of the throne room, his brown eyes ablaze. Lady laurie, a beautiful woman with hair like flowing gold, followed her husband out with troubled thoughts and her ten year old son. The child watched and waited.

XD, so yeah, pretty bad. Man, I was so proud of this story, In Shining Armor, back in ’92. 15 pages long. And just to prove that I actually haven’t improved that much, I got my current WIP, which is out to three whole pages ;) 

Here are my first four paragraphs of my newest piece:

They called it Before. Everybody called it Before, even the people like himself who were too young to remember it. There's the way it was now and the way it was Before. Though as far as Shashi could tell, mostly it was a matter of scale. For instance, there used to be more than one University. But that was Before. There used to be MIT and Cambridge and Isles. Before. Now there was The University. The one. The only.

Shashi's favorite fiction book from Before was The Golden Compass. Like Lyra Silvertongue at Jordan, Shashi lived at the University and sort of had the run of it. Unlike Lyra, Shashi scuttled through the undergrounds of the school. He could cross between every building without seeing daylight and could creep through the majority of spaces inside by moving through the heating/AC ducts. And like her, he was a wild savage and a spy.

Today, he was spying on Summoning 350. He hid up in the projector booth at the very back of the classroom, overlooking the class from behind, like he sat at the top of an amphitheater. Professor Zaentz was an asshole. But he knew his stuff and Shashi had a voracious hunger for knowing more. Zaentz made it a point of showing off, using his magic to show the slides to the class which allowed Shashi his unusually good seat.

With a spiral of two fingers like throwing a lazy peace sign, Zaentz brought a new summoning circle onto the screen behind him. “The Circle of Parted Currents. Those of you who have been paying attention will note the antecedents in the five corners of the inner pattern.” Zaentz twirled one finger and one of the corners lit up in a glowing golden light to show the three wavy lines, superimposed with a triangle with a circle setting into the outward facing base. A horn within the circle showed the circle was the changing moon. “Mr. Bollin, you have of course been paying attention and can explain how this symbol relates to our last circle.”

And there you go, oldest I got and newest I got.

And I think I shall tag… @Megan-cutler, @sadydoyle, @splendorinthetrash, @nicovamp, & @thesecretsthewriterkeeps. Ignore if you’ve done it or just don’t want to. And anyone who wants to and hasn’t been tagged yet, feel free to consider this a tag. Because why not.

[timclymer]

Barbara’s Ovarian Cancer Story Part II

Ovarian Cancer: Process and Survival

Post Surgery

Read Part I for information regarding diagnosis and surgery…

The next few weeks after my discharge from the hospital, were very busy. My sister, Nance, and my mom decorated the house and Christmas tree. My sister Lauren visited from Washington and cleaned, cooked and lent invaluable support to all of us. There were visits to the surgeon for follow-up and the oncologist for the initial visit. John and my sisters accompanied me. It was so very helpful to have someone else ask questions and write down information. It can be an overwhelming experience, especially when you’re a little “spaced out” on vicodin for pain management, as I was. I signed on to be part of a clinical study using different combinations of medications for eight instead of the normal six cycles. Laurie had brought a book with her that offered a lot of information on how to deal with an ovarian cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatments. One suggestion was to research clinical studies. There is a great deal of “cutting edge” research out there but you may have to hunt for it, do your homework, and bring the information to your doctor. My oncologist’s office was conducting a trial, I was accepted, and I was scheduled to begin treatment on December 21.

Even though I was dreading the whole process, I knew I had to approach it in much the same way I did the surgery, almost like an athletic event or a race. I wanted to go in as strong and as prepared as possible and with a better “attitude.”

Attitude is defined as a manner of acting, feeling or thinking that shows one’s disposition, opinion and mental set. We may not be able to control a situation, but we can choose our attitude about that situation- victim or fighter; passive or aggressive; depressed or striving toward joy and happiness; caught in the “why me’s” or searching for the “what can I learn from this.” With the help of many people and through much reading and research, my “attitude-adjustment” process unfolded.

A booklet entitled “Preparing for Chemo” suggests several things that I immediately put into action.

1) Get your hair cut short so that when your hair starts falling out, it’s less traumatic and won’t clog the shower’s drain. (This worked for the drains but I was still traumatized.)

2) If you plan to wear a wig, shop for it before starting chemo. My sisters and my dear friend and hairdresser Patty, helped with both of these steps. Watching my long hair fall to the floor was very hard and yet made me feel the tiniest bit more in control of what was happening to me. To my surprise, everyone loved my new hairdo. The compliments boosted my ego when I really needed it. Nance and Laurie accompanied me to the wig shop. Laughter is very good medicine-and we laughed a lot as we all played with the wigs before settling on two very nice ones. Four hundred dollars later I was armed with my hair prosthetics and a sore belly from laughing. At this writing, I am sporting my own very short hair after nine months of wigs and hats.

3) The booklet suggests having a dental check up and cleaning before starting chemo. Also important is giving your home a thorough cleaning and perhaps scheduling someone to come in once a week thereafter- a clean house can minimize exposure to infectious agents.

4) Building up strength through exercise and a good diet can help minimize some of the side effects of chemo. This booklet and other helpful literature, is available through oncology offices and offers good practical information. I also found the library and the internet to be good resources.

Shortly after my homecoming, from the hospital, I received a telephone call from Lindy, a volunteer with the Cancer Society (set up by my husband and the cancer support staff at the hospital.) She had been diagnosed and treated for Stage IIIc ovarian cancer seven years ago. Hearing from her gave me a real boost and some good tips for dealing with the upcoming chemo. She shared her experiences with surgery, hair loss and complete recovery! She is still cancer free! In addition to advice on make-up to camouflage the fact that one has no eyebrows or eyelashes, she told me how helpful acupuncture was for her. She felt that it really minimized some of the chemo side-effects and “rebalanced” her body’s energy. I had had a few sessions of acupuncture many years ago, and I immediately knew that this would be right for me. I believe in its efficacy and definitely feel the sessions have been very beneficial.

My first acupuncture session was four days after the first chemo treatment. The meds they gave me to prevent nausea worked very well. I didn’t have much of an appetite and felt a little achy and tired but the only real side effect I experienced was a terrible, hand-wringing itching and tingling in my hands and feet. Amy, my acupuncturist, has worked with several people undergoing chemo, is very knowledgeable, and had a good treatment plan in place for me. I scheduled to see her 2 days before and 4 days after every chemo session. After my first visit with her, I did feel better, more energized and the itching had definitely dissipated a good deal. She gave me some suggestions on supplements and some Chinese herbs to use.

The side effect of itching, burning and tingling is called neuropathy and is fairly common with the types of chemo protocol I was on. After my second and third sessions, the symptoms worsened! I turned to the internet to learn more about neuropathy and what, if anything, I could do about it. I found an article by Cindy H. Makencon, website: http://www.ovarian-news.org, entitled “coping-Tips for dealing with neuropathy.” She offered a great deal of helpful information including reports of studies on the benefits of taking fairly large doses of L-Glutamine Sulfate and Chondroitin. I forwarded this information onto Carolyn, the research nurse in charge of my clinical study, and she shared the information with the oncologist. I had already started taking L-Glutamine when I met with him. He had further researched and developed a new treatment plan for me which included large doses of L-Glutamine, a change in one of the chemo meds, and the addition of a medication called neurontin. The combination of all these things worked! The neuropathy gradually subsided and I’ve had no further problems.

I believe a few other factors contributed to my being able to handle the chemo pretty well. I continued to increase my exercise regimen, progressing to walking everyday and then back to the gym for step-classes, albeit modified, and lifting light weights. Exercise builds muscle strength, increases oxygen and blood flow and for me, was and is a real physical and mental energy boost.

I came across a book entitled: “Herbal Therapy & Supplements- a Scientific and Traditional Approach” written by Merrily A. Kuhn, RN, Ph.D. and David Winston, a herbalist and ethnobiologist. The book was part of an at-home study course that I needed to complete for my RN Continuing Education Credits. The book offers a comprehensive guide to many common and some less common herbs and supplements, their uses, adverse effects, contraindications, and drug-herb interactions. After careful research, I started using several herbs and supplements designed to minimize chemo side effects and boost my immune system. I was careful to use things that do not stimulate estrogen in the body as my cancer was estrogen-receptor positive. I started taking these supplements one or two things at a time in smaller doses in order to monitor any unfavorable reactions, before adding more. Most importantly, I notified my doctor that I was taking supplements and having acupuncture.

At the end of this article, I will offer a complete list of the supplements and herbs that I have been using and some information regarding the rationale for each of these additions.

For several months, our kitchen counter resembled a drug and supplement store. I had to write up a daily schedule of what to take when. It was worth it! Once the neuropathy was under control, I tolerated the remainder of the chemo treatments pretty well. I was able to work full time and exercise, and my appetite and energy levels were good. Physically, acupuncture, exercise, diet, and supplements were, and still are, valuable tools which helped me deal with the chemo and recover from its serious effects.

On another level, the emotional and spiritual aids were an even more powerful part of the healing process. Previously, I mentioned my visualizations regarding pre and post operative healing and seeing myself healthy and cancer free. Now, it was time to take it a step further and include it as a powerful adjunct to the chemo medications. Rather than seeing the meds as a poison, I started to visualize it as “nectar from the gods,” washing through me and being taken up by my immune cells as a potion to destroy cancer cells. A few weeks before my first treatment, I read an article about a young local girl who had battled cancer at age 16. She wrote a book about her experience and included her thoughts on seeing her chemo as “nectar from the gods.” I admired her outlook and incorporated it into my work. My husband, John, created a special tape for me to listen to while receiving the infusion of chemo. This guided exercise included relaxation, healing messages, and suggestions for picturing my immune cells taking care of things and using the chemo effectively. Before each chemo session, even before they started the IV, he would do a relaxation exercise with me. This ritual became a very important part of the process. By working on my “attitude” towards the chemo and by connecting with these parts of myself that can be powerful self-healers, I felt I was taking back control of what was happening. Feeling that you are part of the healing process instead of a passive receiver of medications etc., is very empowering.

Rituals and routines are very comforting, especially when you’re experiencing stressful times. My “chemo ritual” evolved from the very first session. The night before, I meditated and did my healing visualizations at bedtime. John drove me to the oncology center. I selected my chair and we settled in with his relaxation exercise. My sister, Nance, arrived bearing muffins and silly magazines. After visiting and chatting, John left for work and Nance and I munched muffins and laughed at the National Enquirer stories. About an hour before the infusion was completed, my brother, Tom, would arrive for a visit and to take me home. Somewhere in the session, my sister, Laurie, would call from Washington to check in and often John would “pop in” in his travels. I always had company and felt lovingly supported. Sabrina included me in her meditation every morning and my mom would stop by the day after the session for tea and a chat. Every three weeks from December 21 through May 27, we followed this routine. The nurses and my family got to know one another and we became a real team!

Returning to work seven weeks after surgery was another normalizing routine that made me feel like I was taking back my life. Except for the day of chemo and the following day, I have worked full time, feeling productive, healthy and normal. My co-workers have been very supportive and caring. They even threw me a graduation party to celebrate the completion of chemo.

Even before my last chemo, I was researching what to do to prevent a recurrence of the disease. I found information on a clinical study for Ovarex, a vaccine designed to prevent a recurrence of ovarian cancer. After many phone calls, letters and haggling with my insurance company, I was accepted into a study being conducted at Stanford’s Cancer Center in Palo Alto. It involved monthly infusions for the first three months and then every twelve weeks for the rest of the year, with routine labs and CT scans. I have experienced only mild side effects and feel fortunate to have access to one more tool.

This past year has been one of lessons for me. I would have preferred the “universe” had given me a gentle tap on the shoulder instead of this Giant Thump on the head to let me know I had things to learn about myself and how “I am” in the world. Here are some of the things I have learned from this experience:

1. Pay attention – perhaps if I had agitated more forcefully with my doctor that something was NOT right, she would have responded with more attention. LISTEN to your body and trust your intuition.

2. Don’t take anything for granted – people, job, health, hair. When you face the loss of these things, you realize how special people are, how the day-to-day routine of a job is a gift, how precious good health is and even how much better a “bad hair” day is than NO HAIR!

3. There are a great many sources of invaluable information out there through people, libraries and the internet. Taking advantage of these resources allowed me to create a comprehensive plan to restore my health and fight the disease using a combination of Western and alternative therapies.

4. We do have choices in how we deal with a crisis – probably the best choice for me was to reach out and ask for help. The more people I told about my health issues, the more positive energy came my way. I felt empowered rather than vulnerable and armed with my helmet (a wig, which, by the way, I got complements on) and my armor (acupuncture, supplements, chemo, prayers and visualization) I was ready to do battle. I was “Warrior Princess” instead of cancer patient.

5. Laughter is GOOD MEDICINE!

At this writing, my labs and CT scans are completely normal. I am back to my normal routines of work and exercise. I am sporting a “Jamie Lee Curtis” hairdo. I am excited about decorating and shopping for Thanksgiving and when we all come together, we’ll have a lot to be thankful for! Before we dig into our feast, I will be asking each person to write on a piece of paper, one thing that they are grateful for. Each of us will then withdraw one of these papers from the basket and try to guess who wrote the message. It will be easy to guess mine. I am grateful for all the love and support from my family and friends (with a special thanks to my son, Matt, and my husband for shaving their heads to support me and to my son, Mike, and his band for dedicating songs to me at concerts and their fund raising for the Cancer Society.) I am grateful for the prayers and best wishes that came my way from people I do not even know. I thank you!!! Well, of course, that’s more than one thing on my piece of paper but so what! It’s time to celebrate!

Happy Thanksgiving 2004 and celebrate every day of your life.

Barbara’s Complete Ovarian Cancer Fighting Supplement List:

Three Imperial Mushroom Capsules – available through acupuncture office

A) Reishi- Immuno stimulant: enhances immune system; use is sanctioned by the Japanese Health Ministry as an adjunct treatment for cancer; Increases activity of chemotheraputic agents and reduces adverse effects such as nausea, decreased white blood cell counts; helps protect the liver against damage caused by viral, drug and environmental toxins.

B) Shitaki- strengthens immune system response; improves survival times of cancer patients when used concurrently with chemo.

C) Maitake- best known for cancer fighting properties; many doctors in Japan use it to lower blood pressure and blood lipids; effective as an anti-tumor agent and immune system modulator.

Echinacia- used in Germany along with chemo in the treatment of cancer. May enhance white blood cell counts in persons undergoing chemo.

Cat’s Claw- reduces side effects of chemo; used in clinical practice in Europe for cancer & HIV; has important immune enhancing properties; helps increase the number of T-cells, the true soldiers of the immune system. In Austria, it is used together with conventional treatment (chemo, radiation &/or surgery) to treat hundreds of cancer patients per year.

Graviola- scientists have been studying this herb since the 1940’s – four studies were published in 1998 re: significant anti-tumor properties and selective toxicity against various types of cancer cells (without harming healthy cells; Purdue University has conducted a great deal of research on the Annonaceous acetogenins family to which graviola belongs) much of which has been funded by the National Cancer Institute or the National Institute of Health.

Acidophyllis- rebalances intestinal flora (especially important when you’re taking a lot of medications.)

Multivitamins with Vitamin E

Calcium Supplement

IP-6 with Insositol- has been studied extensively for over 20 years; has powerful effects on the immune system.

Wheat Grass Juice- increases hemoglobin; rebuilds the blood; improves body’s ability to heal wounds; washes drug deposits from the body; neutralizes toxins and carcinogens in the body.

Green and White Tea- Chinese believe green tea is a cure for cancer and a longevity tonic; boosts immune system function; research being done all over the world and in the US by the National Cancer Institute re: anti-tumor activity. Both green and white tea are excellent antioxidants.

Website for researching herbs- Plant Database Raintree Nutrition

I used the guided relaxations/visualizations CD’s from the Stress Education Center-Dstress.com

1. #209 Stress Management for Pre and Post-op Survival

2. #208 Stress Management for Healing

Reference:

Health Update from SELF Magazine by Jennifer Nelson November, 2004

Ovarian cancer: a not-so-silent killer

“Early diagnosis is crucial. When disease is caught before it spreads, 80 percent of women will survive.”

by Barbara Ehlers-Mason, RN and L. John Mason, Ph.D.

Written in November, 2004, one year after the Surgery for Ovarian Cancer, in November, 2003

Stress Education Center (707) 795-2228 website: http://www.dstress.com

Source by L. John Mason

from Home Solutions Forev https://homesolutionsforev.com/barbaras-ovarian-cancer-story-part-ii/ via Home Solutions on WordPress from Home Solutions FOREV https://homesolutionsforev.tumblr.com/post/187451427000 via Tim Clymer on Wordpress

[homesolutionsforev]

Barbara’s Ovarian Cancer Story Part II

Ovarian Cancer: Process and Survival

Post Surgery

Read Part I for information regarding diagnosis and surgery…

The next few weeks after my discharge from the hospital, were very busy. My sister, Nance, and my mom decorated the house and Christmas tree. My sister Lauren visited from Washington and cleaned, cooked and lent invaluable support to all of us. There were visits to the surgeon for follow-up and the oncologist for the initial visit. John and my sisters accompanied me. It was so very helpful to have someone else ask questions and write down information. It can be an overwhelming experience, especially when you’re a little “spaced out” on vicodin for pain management, as I was. I signed on to be part of a clinical study using different combinations of medications for eight instead of the normal six cycles. Laurie had brought a book with her that offered a lot of information on how to deal with an ovarian cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatments. One suggestion was to research clinical studies. There is a great deal of “cutting edge” research out there but you may have to hunt for it, do your homework, and bring the information to your doctor. My oncologist’s office was conducting a trial, I was accepted, and I was scheduled to begin treatment on December 21.

Even though I was dreading the whole process, I knew I had to approach it in much the same way I did the surgery, almost like an athletic event or a race. I wanted to go in as strong and as prepared as possible and with a better “attitude.”

Attitude is defined as a manner of acting, feeling or thinking that shows one’s disposition, opinion and mental set. We may not be able to control a situation, but we can choose our attitude about that situation- victim or fighter; passive or aggressive; depressed or striving toward joy and happiness; caught in the “why me’s” or searching for the “what can I learn from this.” With the help of many people and through much reading and research, my “attitude-adjustment” process unfolded.

A booklet entitled “Preparing for Chemo” suggests several things that I immediately put into action.

1) Get your hair cut short so that when your hair starts falling out, it’s less traumatic and won’t clog the shower’s drain. (This worked for the drains but I was still traumatized.)

2) If you plan to wear a wig, shop for it before starting chemo. My sisters and my dear friend and hairdresser Patty, helped with both of these steps. Watching my long hair fall to the floor was very hard and yet made me feel the tiniest bit more in control of what was happening to me. To my surprise, everyone loved my new hairdo. The compliments boosted my ego when I really needed it. Nance and Laurie accompanied me to the wig shop. Laughter is very good medicine-and we laughed a lot as we all played with the wigs before settling on two very nice ones. Four hundred dollars later I was armed with my hair prosthetics and a sore belly from laughing. At this writing, I am sporting my own very short hair after nine months of wigs and hats.

3) The booklet suggests having a dental check up and cleaning before starting chemo. Also important is giving your home a thorough cleaning and perhaps scheduling someone to come in once a week thereafter- a clean house can minimize exposure to infectious agents.

4) Building up strength through exercise and a good diet can help minimize some of the side effects of chemo. This booklet and other helpful literature, is available through oncology offices and offers good practical information. I also found the library and the internet to be good resources.

Shortly after my homecoming, from the hospital, I received a telephone call from Lindy, a volunteer with the Cancer Society (set up by my husband and the cancer support staff at the hospital.) She had been diagnosed and treated for Stage IIIc ovarian cancer seven years ago. Hearing from her gave me a real boost and some good tips for dealing with the upcoming chemo. She shared her experiences with surgery, hair loss and complete recovery! She is still cancer free! In addition to advice on make-up to camouflage the fact that one has no eyebrows or eyelashes, she told me how helpful acupuncture was for her. She felt that it really minimized some of the chemo side-effects and “rebalanced” her body’s energy. I had had a few sessions of acupuncture many years ago, and I immediately knew that this would be right for me. I believe in its efficacy and definitely feel the sessions have been very beneficial.

My first acupuncture session was four days after the first chemo treatment. The meds they gave me to prevent nausea worked very well. I didn’t have much of an appetite and felt a little achy and tired but the only real side effect I experienced was a terrible, hand-wringing itching and tingling in my hands and feet. Amy, my acupuncturist, has worked with several people undergoing chemo, is very knowledgeable, and had a good treatment plan in place for me. I scheduled to see her 2 days before and 4 days after every chemo session. After my first visit with her, I did feel better, more energized and the itching had definitely dissipated a good deal. She gave me some suggestions on supplements and some Chinese herbs to use.

The side effect of itching, burning and tingling is called neuropathy and is fairly common with the types of chemo protocol I was on. After my second and third sessions, the symptoms worsened! I turned to the internet to learn more about neuropathy and what, if anything, I could do about it. I found an article by Cindy H. Makencon, website: http://www.ovarian-news.org, entitled “coping-Tips for dealing with neuropathy.” She offered a great deal of helpful information including reports of studies on the benefits of taking fairly large doses of L-Glutamine Sulfate and Chondroitin. I forwarded this information onto Carolyn, the research nurse in charge of my clinical study, and she shared the information with the oncologist. I had already started taking L-Glutamine when I met with him. He had further researched and developed a new treatment plan for me which included large doses of L-Glutamine, a change in one of the chemo meds, and the addition of a medication called neurontin. The combination of all these things worked! The neuropathy gradually subsided and I’ve had no further problems.

I believe a few other factors contributed to my being able to handle the chemo pretty well. I continued to increase my exercise regimen, progressing to walking everyday and then back to the gym for step-classes, albeit modified, and lifting light weights. Exercise builds muscle strength, increases oxygen and blood flow and for me, was and is a real physical and mental energy boost.

I came across a book entitled: “Herbal Therapy & Supplements- a Scientific and Traditional Approach” written by Merrily A. Kuhn, RN, Ph.D. and David Winston, a herbalist and ethnobiologist. The book was part of an at-home study course that I needed to complete for my RN Continuing Education Credits. The book offers a comprehensive guide to many common and some less common herbs and supplements, their uses, adverse effects, contraindications, and drug-herb interactions. After careful research, I started using several herbs and supplements designed to minimize chemo side effects and boost my immune system. I was careful to use things that do not stimulate estrogen in the body as my cancer was estrogen-receptor positive. I started taking these supplements one or two things at a time in smaller doses in order to monitor any unfavorable reactions, before adding more. Most importantly, I notified my doctor that I was taking supplements and having acupuncture.

At the end of this article, I will offer a complete list of the supplements and herbs that I have been using and some information regarding the rationale for each of these additions.

For several months, our kitchen counter resembled a drug and supplement store. I had to write up a daily schedule of what to take when. It was worth it! Once the neuropathy was under control, I tolerated the remainder of the chemo treatments pretty well. I was able to work full time and exercise, and my appetite and energy levels were good. Physically, acupuncture, exercise, diet, and supplements were, and still are, valuable tools which helped me deal with the chemo and recover from its serious effects.

On another level, the emotional and spiritual aids were an even more powerful part of the healing process. Previously, I mentioned my visualizations regarding pre and post operative healing and seeing myself healthy and cancer free. Now, it was time to take it a step further and include it as a powerful adjunct to the chemo medications. Rather than seeing the meds as a poison, I started to visualize it as “nectar from the gods,” washing through me and being taken up by my immune cells as a potion to destroy cancer cells. A few weeks before my first treatment, I read an article about a young local girl who had battled cancer at age 16. She wrote a book about her experience and included her thoughts on seeing her chemo as “nectar from the gods.” I admired her outlook and incorporated it into my work. My husband, John, created a special tape for me to listen to while receiving the infusion of chemo. This guided exercise included relaxation, healing messages, and suggestions for picturing my immune cells taking care of things and using the chemo effectively. Before each chemo session, even before they started the IV, he would do a relaxation exercise with me. This ritual became a very important part of the process. By working on my “attitude” towards the chemo and by connecting with these parts of myself that can be powerful self-healers, I felt I was taking back control of what was happening. Feeling that you are part of the healing process instead of a passive receiver of medications etc., is very empowering.

Rituals and routines are very comforting, especially when you’re experiencing stressful times. My “chemo ritual” evolved from the very first session. The night before, I meditated and did my healing visualizations at bedtime. John drove me to the oncology center. I selected my chair and we settled in with his relaxation exercise. My sister, Nance, arrived bearing muffins and silly magazines. After visiting and chatting, John left for work and Nance and I munched muffins and laughed at the National Enquirer stories. About an hour before the infusion was completed, my brother, Tom, would arrive for a visit and to take me home. Somewhere in the session, my sister, Laurie, would call from Washington to check in and often John would “pop in” in his travels. I always had company and felt lovingly supported. Sabrina included me in her meditation every morning and my mom would stop by the day after the session for tea and a chat. Every three weeks from December 21 through May 27, we followed this routine. The nurses and my family got to know one another and we became a real team!

Returning to work seven weeks after surgery was another normalizing routine that made me feel like I was taking back my life. Except for the day of chemo and the following day, I have worked full time, feeling productive, healthy and normal. My co-workers have been very supportive and caring. They even threw me a graduation party to celebrate the completion of chemo.

Even before my last chemo, I was researching what to do to prevent a recurrence of the disease. I found information on a clinical study for Ovarex, a vaccine designed to prevent a recurrence of ovarian cancer. After many phone calls, letters and haggling with my insurance company, I was accepted into a study being conducted at Stanford’s Cancer Center in Palo Alto. It involved monthly infusions for the first three months and then every twelve weeks for the rest of the year, with routine labs and CT scans. I have experienced only mild side effects and feel fortunate to have access to one more tool.

This past year has been one of lessons for me. I would have preferred the “universe” had given me a gentle tap on the shoulder instead of this Giant Thump on the head to let me know I had things to learn about myself and how “I am” in the world. Here are some of the things I have learned from this experience:

1. Pay attention – perhaps if I had agitated more forcefully with my doctor that something was NOT right, she would have responded with more attention. LISTEN to your body and trust your intuition.

2. Don’t take anything for granted – people, job, health, hair. When you face the loss of these things, you realize how special people are, how the day-to-day routine of a job is a gift, how precious good health is and even how much better a “bad hair” day is than NO HAIR!

3. There are a great many sources of invaluable information out there through people, libraries and the internet. Taking advantage of these resources allowed me to create a comprehensive plan to restore my health and fight the disease using a combination of Western and alternative therapies.

4. We do have choices in how we deal with a crisis – probably the best choice for me was to reach out and ask for help. The more people I told about my health issues, the more positive energy came my way. I felt empowered rather than vulnerable and armed with my helmet (a wig, which, by the way, I got complements on) and my armor (acupuncture, supplements, chemo, prayers and visualization) I was ready to do battle. I was “Warrior Princess” instead of cancer patient.

5. Laughter is GOOD MEDICINE!

At this writing, my labs and CT scans are completely normal. I am back to my normal routines of work and exercise. I am sporting a “Jamie Lee Curtis” hairdo. I am excited about decorating and shopping for Thanksgiving and when we all come together, we’ll have a lot to be thankful for! Before we dig into our feast, I will be asking each person to write on a piece of paper, one thing that they are grateful for. Each of us will then withdraw one of these papers from the basket and try to guess who wrote the message. It will be easy to guess mine. I am grateful for all the love and support from my family and friends (with a special thanks to my son, Matt, and my husband for shaving their heads to support me and to my son, Mike, and his band for dedicating songs to me at concerts and their fund raising for the Cancer Society.) I am grateful for the prayers and best wishes that came my way from people I do not even know. I thank you!!! Well, of course, that’s more than one thing on my piece of paper but so what! It’s time to celebrate!

Happy Thanksgiving 2004 and celebrate every day of your life.

Barbara’s Complete Ovarian Cancer Fighting Supplement List:

Three Imperial Mushroom Capsules – available through acupuncture office

A) Reishi- Immuno stimulant: enhances immune system; use is sanctioned by the Japanese Health Ministry as an adjunct treatment for cancer; Increases activity of chemotheraputic agents and reduces adverse effects such as nausea, decreased white blood cell counts; helps protect the liver against damage caused by viral, drug and environmental toxins.

B) Shitaki- strengthens immune system response; improves survival times of cancer patients when used concurrently with chemo.

C) Maitake- best known for cancer fighting properties; many doctors in Japan use it to lower blood pressure and blood lipids; effective as an anti-tumor agent and immune system modulator.

Echinacia- used in Germany along with chemo in the treatment of cancer. May enhance white blood cell counts in persons undergoing chemo.

Cat’s Claw- reduces side effects of chemo; used in clinical practice in Europe for cancer & HIV; has important immune enhancing properties; helps increase the number of T-cells, the true soldiers of the immune system. In Austria, it is used together with conventional treatment (chemo, radiation &/or surgery) to treat hundreds of cancer patients per year.

Graviola- scientists have been studying this herb since the 1940’s – four studies were published in 1998 re: significant anti-tumor properties and selective toxicity against various types of cancer cells (without harming healthy cells; Purdue University has conducted a great deal of research on the Annonaceous acetogenins family to which graviola belongs) much of which has been funded by the National Cancer Institute or the National Institute of Health.

Acidophyllis- rebalances intestinal flora (especially important when you’re taking a lot of medications.)

Multivitamins with Vitamin E

Calcium Supplement

IP-6 with Insositol- has been studied extensively for over 20 years; has powerful effects on the immune system.

Wheat Grass Juice- increases hemoglobin; rebuilds the blood; improves body’s ability to heal wounds; washes drug deposits from the body; neutralizes toxins and carcinogens in the body.

Green and White Tea- Chinese believe green tea is a cure for cancer and a longevity tonic; boosts immune system function; research being done all over the world and in the US by the National Cancer Institute re: anti-tumor activity. Both green and white tea are excellent antioxidants.

Website for researching herbs- Plant Database Raintree Nutrition

I used the guided relaxations/visualizations CD’s from the Stress Education Center-Dstress.com

1. #209 Stress Management for Pre and Post-op Survival

2. #208 Stress Management for Healing

Reference:

Health Update from SELF Magazine by Jennifer Nelson November, 2004

Ovarian cancer: a not-so-silent killer

“Early diagnosis is crucial. When disease is caught before it spreads, 80 percent of women will survive.”

by Barbara Ehlers-Mason, RN and L. John Mason, Ph.D.

Written in November, 2004, one year after the Surgery for Ovarian Cancer, in November, 2003

Stress Education Center (707) 795-2228 website: http://www.dstress.com

Source by L. John Mason

from Home Solutions Forev https://homesolutionsforev.com/barbaras-ovarian-cancer-story-part-ii/ via Home Solutions on WordPress

[keywestlou]

IT'S A SMALL WORLD

Yesterday, interesting.

Started the day with Lori. Haircut time. I was in the chair less than 5 minutes. We covered a multitude of sins during the time. It has always been so during the 20 years she has been cutting my hair.

Radio show with Laurie Thibaud at 4. Station 105.7 FM, WGAY FM.

Party Time!

We get better together every week. Exchange thoughts about everything. I enjoy doing the show with her.

The station’s owner was in. Michael Stapleford. Not sure where his permanent home is. He has taken an apartment in Key West since opening the station.

Fiftyish.

Talk about it being a small world, Michael and I have similar roots. He was born and raised in the Utica area. St. Luke’s Memorial Hospital. Raised in nearby Clinton. His Dad a physician. Ob-gyn. Practiced at the Slocum-Dixon Clinic.

It gets better.

Michael went to Syracuse. Graduated from Newhouse. He had to be smart to get into Newhouse. One of the finest communication schools in the country.

Today, I do a small show once a week with Laurie at a radio station he owns.

The show over, I walked across the street to the Pier House. The Chart Room, of course.

Great time!

Ted from Cazenovia at the bar. My retired court clerk friend. He is in Key West till the end of the month.

Farmer friend Devin came in. A midwest farmer taking a beating because of Trump’s tariff war with China.

Further down this blog, I have written a bit about the farm industry being in a coffin waiting to be buried if the tariff war with China is not soon resolved.

David showed up. I was surprised. David was a Chart Room regular every evening. Now, I am lucky if I see him once a month. He tells me Aqua’s Side Bar is his new watering hole.

As I was leaving, ran into Boomer and his wife. Boomer a long time bartender at Don’s Place. I was glad to see them both. Don’s Place has fallen off my places to imbibe so I have not seen Boomer in well over a year.

I told him to say hello to Don for me.

Funny, Don called me 2 weeks ago. First time we have spoken in 2 years. We stopped seeing each other for reasons other than a falling our. Don called yelling over the phone, “Louis, we have not seen each other in a long time. We have to go out to dinner. I’ll call you.”

I’m still waiting. If he does not call by next week, I will call him.

The big event of the evening was Syracuse/Baylor at 10. The first game for both teams in March Madness.

My concern was whether I could stay up that late to watch. I am in bed and asleep most nights by 9. I made it through the first half. Looked at the computer this morning to see who won. It was not Syracuse. Baylor beat Syracuse 78-69.

I am glad the season is over. Too much to take. We won some games we should have lost. We lost games we should have won.

A depressing season.

Power went out this morning. Not for long. Took forever for my computer to kick back on. Wi-fi not connecting. Ergo, I am behind with the blog.

Looking forward to tonight. Dinner with friends at the Conch Republic. The company good. Even better, the meal. Stone crabs. Preceded by oysters.

Dinner companions Donna and Terri, Andrea and Joe, and Barbara.

Two famous people who were in Key West this date in separate years.

In 1902, Mark Twain. Here only for a day. On his way to Cuba.

In 1951, Key West’s beloved Harry Truman. He left for Washington after spending 3 weeks on vacation. Stayed at The Little White House, of course.

This day important for another reason. Not because a particular person was here. Rather a national event occurred. Today’s Key West would be a depressed town economically with out it.

It was 1933. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt signed the Beer and Revenue Act. The new law legalized the sale of alcoholic beverages.

Can you imagine Duval Street without bars selling alcohol. The town would be deserted.

Trump continuously destroys the good in whatever he attempts.

The farm crisis one example.

America’s farmers were basically doing well. Especially in the midwest. They were in the modern swing of things. Many doing business with China.

Trump decides China is not treating the U.S. fairly. He begins a trade war. I recall him saying trade wars were good. He would straighten China out. The U.S. would make more money as a result.

Trump thought the Chinese would back down. He knew them not. Trump was publicly spitting on another major power. An Asian one. Asians always concerned about saving face also.

We have been in the tariff war with China for several months. Trump keeps indicating resolution around the corner. Never comes.

The result is America’s farm country is in a casket. A casket waiting to be lowered into the ground. Buried.

Farmers are suffering their worst economic crisis in 30 years. They cannot sell what was grown. Fortunately, soybeans and corn can be stored. No cash flow, however. No money to meet interest payments. Some losing their farms.

Three causes involved: Low commodity prices, trade war pressures, and record flooding.

The effect of U.S. farmer problems is upending economies around the globe. Trump’s “booming economy” has not touched the farmers. Trump’s trade war with China is killing the American farmer.

A little warm heartedness called for after sharing the American Farmer’s plight.

When I was younger (a long time ago), saturday afternoon was spent at a local theater watching the movies. A double feature, series, and cartoon.

The cartoons were Walt Disney at his best. The one’s starring Porky Pig utilized the same sign off each time. It would be Porky smiling and waving his arm from one side to another saying “That’s all folks!”

For me, that’s all for today. Enjoy it!

IT’S A SMALL WORLD was originally published on Key West Lou

[robinsonplumbing]

Benefits Of A New Water Softener

If you are like many individuals, you may view water softeners as nothing more than a luxury or an extra expense for something that is unnecessary. They think about water softener cost instead the the effects of hard water. In reality, however, this device offers major long-term benefits. In this article, we will discuss some essential facts about water softeners and the advantages that come with using one.

Understanding How Water Softeners Work

Hard water is water that contains substantial levels of magnesium and calcium. Water softeners in Allentown PA are able to remove these minerals, and thus "soften" the water. Hard water can create multiple issues... throughout your home. When homeowners tend to neglect the use of their water softener, they overlook some of the issues associated with hard water, if not all of them. Many of them are unaware of the fact that the build up of minerals cause some significant issues. For example, the calcium and magnesium in your water supply lead to clogged pipes. Minerals also interfere with how detergents and soaps dissolve. This leads to noticeable stains in sinks and bathtubs which affects the appearance of your fixtures and appliances.

Mineral Buildup In Pipes And Appliances

Mineral buildup inside your appliances and pipes... reduce the efficiency of your appliances such as your water heater. This leads to higher energy bills. Soaps and detergents are also less effective when interfered with by magnesium and calcium on a regular basis. Taking a bath or shower in hard water irritates the skin and results in a dull complexion. It leads to drab hair that lacks luster. This is because the minerals leave behind a residue that is difficult to rinse away. Therefore, if your home has hard water, it is worth having a water softener installed. There are many benefits that you will gain from it.

The Solution

A water softener treats hard water to reduce... the negative impacts of minerals such as magnesium and calcium. These softening devices' design create a specific ion exchange that removes positively charged ions. During this exchange, calcium ions turn into crystals. Crystals cannot attach to fixtures, hardware, pipes, or other surfaces. Consequently, the flow of water easily rinses them away. They are neutral, harmless, completely stable, and heat resistant. This process can be done with a model that uses a salt or a salt free water softener system.

 Water Softener Installation: Benefits

When using a water softener, it will prolong the life of your home's appliances and plumbing pipes. They will not become coated with buildup from calcium and magnesium. Additionally, your water heater will not develop lime deposits.

After the installation of a softening device, you can also expect cleaner, shinier plumbing fixtures, tiles, mirrors, glassware, and silverware.

You can also enjoy cleaner, softer, smoother skin and hair.

Cleaning is always easier after the installation of a water softener. A water softener significantly decreases the buildup of soap scum in bathrooms and kitchens with the elimination of minerals.

Clothing is also softer and lasts longer with the removal of hard minerals from your water. This is because fabric has a tendency to trap calcium and magnesium. In addition, white linens and clothing will stay brighter longer.

After considering all the facts, it is easy to see why installing a water softener is a wise course of action for any homeowner. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; }

  Water Softener Allentown PA

If your home was hard water, you will need a professional plumber to come and install a water softener. For a job like this, you can use the skills and expertise that Robinson Plumbing has to offer. We are one of the best water softener companies in the entire Lehigh Valley. Our licensed plumbers will install a water softener for your home in order to prevent the damage that is caused by hard water. We will certainly be able to find the best water softener price to meet your financial needs. All of our services are fast, friendly, and affordably priced. Be sure to call our office today. We will gladly answer any questions that you might have. Best of all, we offer free estimates for all of our plumbing services. Click here to learn about our other plumbing services that we offer. Some of the areas we service include: Allentown, Catasauqua, Coplay, Laurys Station and these zip codes: 18101, 18032, 18037, 18059 as well as all surrounding areas in the Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania. Call us today at (610) 351-9889 or contact us for any questions that you might have!

The following post, Benefits Of A New Water Softener, was first seen on http://www.RobinsonPlumbing.com/

[amazingviralinfo]

Image: twitter composite

Twitter provided a platform for a bit of drama this week.

Recent exes Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris caused a stir, Harris eventually brought Katy Perry into the mix, and then Perry threw in Hillary Clinton. Of course Pokmon Go took over our data bills and our Twitter feeds this week everyone from jealous Canadians to the (totally incorrect)AP Stylebook had something to say about it.

SEE ALSO: Politics and potatoes rose to the tops of our Twitter feeds this week

And, of course, a terrorist attack killed 84 people in Nice, France, on Thursday evening during Bastille Day celebrations. The White House released a statement from President Obama on Twitter reflecting on the tragedy.

On some lighter notes, a Bachelor-winning couple used Twitter to express the joys of parenthood, your favorite Broadway star left more than just his role in Hamilton behind and Bernie Sanders finally endorsed his choice for president.

1. Canada is creatively coping with its lack of Pokmon Go

Real Canadian gameplay of #PokemonGO pic.twitter.com/sqX09r5J0e

Trebla (@AlbertWick) July 6, 2016

we don't need #PokemonGO in Canada because we already have real ones roaming the country @Pokemon pic.twitter.com/OBO5V9epCO

Brynn Elizabeth (@brynnsadventure) July 10, 2016

So close, yet so far. Canadian Pokmon fans are still waiting for Pokmon Go to make its way up north, so they came up with creative ways to play the game IRL. The trainers-in-waiting tried everything from dressing up in Pikachu costumes to throwing Pok Balls at dogs. Spoiler: Real dogs do not fit in Pok Balls.

2. Bernie Sanders announced his presidential endorsement

Our job now is to see our progressive platform implemented by a Democratic Senate, a Democratic House and a Hillary Clinton presidency.

Bernie Sanders (@BernieSanders) July 12, 2016

Bernie Sanders finally accepted the fact that hes out of the 2016 presidential race, and he endorsed Hillary Clinton for president. After making a speech encouraging his supporters to vote for her this November, Sanders tweeted some highlights from his speech.

3. Obama made a statement on the Nice, France, attacks

.@POTUS on the attack in Nice, France: pic.twitter.com/CrbChxZs04

The White House (@WhiteHouse) July 14, 2016

On Thursday, a devastating terrorist attack in Nice, France, during Bastille Day celebrations killed at least 84 people. French President Francois Hollande announced that Frances state of emergency that has been in place since the November 2015 Paris terrorist attacks will be extended another three months. The White Houses Twitter account shared President Obamas statement on the tragic event. We stand in solidarity and partnership with France, our oldest ally, as they respond to and recover from this attack. Obama wrote. On this Bastille Day, we are reminded of the extraordinary resilience and democratic values that have made France an inspiration to the entire world.

4. Sean Lowe and Catherine Giudici Lowe are very silly parents

Day 8 of being a parent: the kid has peed on everything. I think he's marking his territory and possibly planning a takeover.

Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) July 11, 2016

The latest Bachelor success story is growing last week, Sean Lowe and Catherine Giudici Lowe welcomed their first child. Our favorite part of the new family? The parents havent been shy about logging Samuel Thomas bodily fluids on Twitter. Day 8 of being a parent: the kid has peed on everything. I think he's marking his territory and possibly planning a takeover, is just one of their graphic yet hilarious Twitter entries.

5. Lin-Manuel Miranda made one big transformation after his last night in Hamilton

Teach 'em how to say goodbye... pic.twitter.com/dJ49jUYHlh

Lin-Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel) July 10, 2016

After rocking flowing Hamilton locks for over a year, Lin-Manuel Miranda chopped them off right after his final performance in the Broadway show on Saturday evening. Instead of sharing a photo of his lighter head, he tweeted a shot of the discarded hair. He quoted a perfect Hamilton lyric in the caption: Teach 'em how to say goodbye

6. The internet does not agree with AP Styles stylization of Pokmon Go.

You asked: "Pokemon Go," w quote marks & lowercase o in Go. No accent mark. Plural: Pokemon. Use made-up words sparingly; Pokestop is OK.

AP Stylebook (@APStylebook) July 12, 2016

The AP Stylebooks official Twitter account posted their thoughts on how publications that follow the Associated Press style should format Pokmon Go. Their suggestion to forego the accent mark sent the internet up in flames, since weve been using an accent mark in the word Pokmon for 20 years. Mashable will continue to use the accent mark, as well as make up PokWords.

7. Calvin Harris was not happy about what Taylor Swift disclosed

I know you're off tour and you need someone new to try and bury like Katy ETC but I'm not that guy, sorry. I won't allow it

Calvin Harris (@CalvinHarris) July 13, 2016

After Taylor Swift broke the news that she wrote ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris song This Is What You Came For under a pseudonym, Harris responded to her with a slew of tweets. The Katy in question is undoubtedly Katy Perry its been long speculated that Swift wrote Bad Blood about the pop star. Perry got in on the Twitter drama as well...

8. Katy Perry tweeted an A + gif of Hillary Clinton in response to Calvin Harris

pic.twitter.com/m6ebYV8D1r

KATY PERRY (@katyperry) July 13, 2016

If pictures are worth a thousand words, then a GIF is worth at least a thousand tweets. In response to Harris above burn, Katy Perry tweeted a GIF of Hillary Clinton sassily shrugging from behind a podium. Perry is acknowledging that she was dragged into the situation, but shes smartly not being too forward about it. Perry has the most Twitter followers in the world, so shes surely getting her detached point across.

9. New York comedian is changing one thing about Jason Bourne posters

Hey New Yorkers, what if we just peel off the guns in the Jason Bourne ads. So tired of guns. pic.twitter.com/SrjjRsyPCB

Tami Sagher (@Tambone) July 12, 2016

If anyone knows New York, its comedian Tami Sagher, who has written for How I Met Your Mother, Broad City, 30 Rock, Girls and Inside Amy Schumer. Sagher is tired of gun violence, and she tweeted a proposal that when New Yorkers see subway ads for the upcoming movie Jason Bourne, they should peel the sticker off where the gun appears.

10. The new Fab Five is very excited for the Olympics

When you find out you're going to the olympics>> pic.twitter.com/st3A26seDM

Laurie Hernandez (@lzhernandez02) July 11, 2016

Sixteen-year-old gymnast Laurie Hernandez couldnt resist tweeting a video of the backstage excitement that occurred after she, Simone Biles, Gabby Douglas, Madison Kocian and Aly Raisman found out they were officially Olympics bound. In the short clip, Hernandez, Biles and Raisman goofily dance around their dressing room and shout Were going to the Olympics!

11. Hollywoods latest scandalous affair is between two Disney characters

You can't trust anyone now a day! pic.twitter.com/C82fnwDaUv

Flower (@florrchata) July 10, 2016

A Disneyland visitor caught Minnie Mouse in an adulterous moment of passion with none other than her husbandMickey Mouses pal Goofy. Whats most disturbing is that Mickey seems to be humored by the situation he was photographed staring at them from the shadows with a ridiculous grin on his face. If anyone has any celebrity tips on this, please send them to Mashable.

Have something to add to this story? Share it in the comments.

[nocturbia]

False beginnings

“I don’t like it when the main character dies at the end of Chapter One. Why did I just spend all this time with this character? I feel cheated.” – Cricket Freeman, The August Agency

“I dislike opening scenes that you think are real, then the protagonist wakes up. It makes me feel cheated.” – Laurie McLean, Foreword Literary

In science fiction

“A sci-fi novel that spends the first two pages describing the strange landscape.” – Chip MacGregor, MacGregor Literary

Prologues

“I’m not a fan of prologues, preferring to find myself in the midst of a moving plot on page one rather than being kept outside of it, or eased into it.” – Michelle Andelman, Regal Literary

“Most agents hate prologues. Just make the first chapter relevant and well written.” – Andrea Brown, Andrea Brown Literary Agency

“Prologues are usually a lazy way to give back-story chunks to the reader and can be handled with more finesse throughout the story. Damn the prologue, full speed ahead!” – Laurie McLean, Foreword Literary

Exposition and description

“Perhaps my biggest pet peeve with an opening chapter is when an author features too much exposition – when they go beyond what is necessary for simply ‘setting the scene.’ I want to feel as if I’m in the hands of a master storyteller, and starting a story with long, flowery, overly-descriptive sentences (kind of like this one) makes the writer seem amateurish and the story contrived. Of course, an equally jarring beginning can be nearly as off-putting, and I hesitate to read on if I’m feeling disoriented by the fifth page. I enjoy when writers can find a good balance between exposition and mystery. Too much accounting always ruins the mystery of a novel, and the unknown is what propels us to read further.” – Peter Miller, PMA Literary and Film Management

“The [adjective] [adjective] sun rose in the [adjective] [adjective] sky, shedding its [adjective] light across the [adjective] [adjective] [adjective] land.” – Chip MacGregor, MacGregor Literary

“I dislike endless ‘laundry list’ character descriptions. For example: ‘She had eyes the color of a summer sky and long blonde hair that fell in ringlets past her shoulders. Her petite nose was the perfect size for her heart-shaped face. Her azure dress — with the empire waist and long, tight sleeves — sported tiny pearl buttons down the bodice. Ivory lace peeked out of the hem in front, blah, blah.’ Who cares! Work it into the story.” – Laurie McLean, Foreword Literary

Starting too slowly

“Characters that are moving around doing little things, but essentially nothing. Washing dishes & thinking, staring out the window & thinking, tying shoes, thinking.” – Dan Lazar, Writers House

“I don’t really like ‘first day of school’ beginnings, ‘from the beginning of time,’ or ‘once upon a time.’ Specifically, I dislike a Chapter One in which nothing happens.” – Jessica Regel, Foundry Literary + Media

In crime fiction

“Someone squinting into the sunlight with a hangover in a crime novel. Good grief — been done a million times.” – Chip MacGregor, MacGregor Literary

In fantasy

“Cliché openings in fantasy can include an opening scene set in a battle (and my peeve is that I don’t know any of the characters yet so why should I care about this battle) or with a pastoral scene where the protagonist is gathering herbs (I didn’t realize how common this is).” – Kristin Nelson, Nelson Literary

Voice

“I know this may sound obvious, but too much ‘telling’ vs. ‘showing’ in the first chapter is a definite warning sign for me. The first chapter should present a compelling scene, not a road map for the rest of the book. The goal is to make the reader curious about your characters, fill their heads with questions that must be answered, not fill them in on exactly where, when, who and how.” – Emily Sylvan Kim, Prospect Agency

“I hate reading purple prose – describing something so beautifully that has nothing to do with the actual story.” – Cherry Weiner, Cherry Weiner Literary

“A cheesy hook drives me nuts. They say ‘Open with a hook!’ to grab the reader. That’s true, but there’s a fine line between an intriguing hook and one that’s just silly. An example of a silly hook would be opening with a line of overtly sexual dialogue.” – Daniel Lazar, Writers House

“I don’t like an opening line that’s ‘My name is…,’ introducing the narrator to the reader so blatantly. There are far better ways in Chapter One to establish an instant connection between narrator and reader.” – Michelle Andelman, Regal Literary

“Sometimes a reasonably good writer will create an interesting character and describe him in a compelling way, but then he’ll turn out to be some unimportant bit player.” – Ellen Pepus, Signature Literary Agency

In romance

“In romance, I can’t stand this scenario: A woman is awakened to find a strange man in her bedroom — and then automatically finds him attractive. I’m sorry, but if I awoke to a strange man in my bedroom, I’d be reaching for a weapon — not admiring the view.” – Kristin Nelson, Nelson Literary Agency

Characters and backstory

“I don’t like descriptions of the characters where writers make them too perfect. Heroines (and heroes) who are described physically as being virtually unflawed come across as unrelatable and boring. No ‘flowing, wind-swept golden locks’; no ‘eyes as blue as the sky’; no ‘willowy, perfect figures.’ ” – Laura Bradford, Bradford Literary Agency

“Many writers express the character’s backstory before they get to the plot. Good writers will go back and cut that stuff out and get right to the plot. The character’s backstory stays with them — it’s in their DNA.” – Adam Chromy, Movable Type Management

“I’m turned off when a writer feels the need to fill in all the backstory before starting the story; a story that opens on the protagonist’s mental reflection of their situation is a red flag.” – Stephany Evans, FinePrint Literary Management

“One of the biggest problems is the ‘information dump’ in the first few pages, where the author is trying to tell us everything we supposedly need to know to understand the story. Getting to know characters in a story is like getting to know people in real life. You find out their personality and details of their life over time.” – Rachelle Gardner, Books & Such Literary

[mightywriting]

College App Essay Tip #4

“CRAZY MIKE DID IT!” Remember, the real purpose of any admissions essay is to help the reader get to know you—your passions, your humor, your grace and determination—as well some little “quirks” that make you who you are. In the last College Application Essay tip, I called this your genius, and in this tip I’ll remind you that while showing your genius, you don’t need to sound like a smartypants. You just need to sound like you.

We all have distinct and recognizable ways of talking; in writing we can create that voice on the page. Because I love examples, let’s take Tina Fey, the comedian and writer. In her best selling book, Bossypants, she writes about having been slashed by an attacker when she was a kid. Even with this serious subject matter, her humorous voice comes through:

But I will tell you this: My scar was a miniature form of celebrity. Kids knew who I was because of it. Lots of people liked to claim they were there when it happened. I was there. I saw it. Crazy Mike did it!

Adults were kind to me because of it. Aunts and family friends gave me Easter candy and oversize Hershey's Kisses long after I was too old for presents. I was made to feel special.  

On the other hand, in his autobiography Open, tennis pro Andre Agassi’s voice feels much more introspective. He stares in the mirror and reflects on his childhood:

Whoever I might be, I’m not the boy who started this odyssey, and I’m not even the man who announced three months ago that the odyssey was coming to an end. I’m like a tennis racket on which I’ve replaced the grip four times and the strings seven times—is it accurate to call it the same racket? Somewhere in those eyes, however, I can still vaguely see the boy who didn’t want to play tennis in the first place, the boy who wanted to quit, the boy who did quit many times. I see that golden-haired boy who hated tennis, and I wonder how he would view this bald man, who still hates tennis and yet still plays.  

DO YOU HEAR VOICES? How did Fey and Agassi create such different voices?  Well there’s word choice, of course. While Fey uses language the evokes a school playground, ”Crazy Mike did it!”, Agasssi makes choices that reflect how much tennis has permeated his life, comparing himself to racket in which the “grip” and “strings” have been replaced. Perhaps you’ve got a lexicon all your own. Do you call sandwiches “grinders” or know all the terminology of paleontology? What words come as second nature? The point is to use words that you know and love. 

Beyond word choice, there’s something else that makes voice come through, and it’s sentence structure. Tina Fey’s short punchy sentences are funny, while Agassi uses longer more complex sentences, with poetic repetitions and variations. For example, he writes “I’m not the boy [...] I’m not even the man...” to create layers of emotion, spanning anger, bewilderment, and regret.

READ BEFORE YOU WRITE! Pick up any memoir or autobiography, and you’ll “hear” a different voice. Much as a painter might first study the work of a master, see if you can you can learn by exploring word choices and finding patterns in sentence structure. A few nonfiction writers to explore: Mary Carr, Annie Dillard, Bob Dylan, Anne Lamott, Barack Obama, Mark Salzman, David Sedaris, Amy Tan, and others. 

Even ten minutes of reading attentively before writing can yield amazing results.

TEN-MINUTE TASK FOR THE AMBITIOUS After reading, spend just a few more minutes imitating another writer’s voice. Your content should be completely different as it is the structure of sentences you want to mimic.

Here’s a memoirist I love, Mary Karr, in the opening of her memoir Lit:

Age seventeen, stringy-haired and halter-topped, weighing in the high double digits and unhindered by a high school diploma, I showed up at the Pacific ocean, ready to seek my fortune with a truck full of extremely stoned surfers. My family, I thought them to be, for such was my quest — a family I could stand alongside pondering the sea. We stood as the blue water surged toward us in six-foot coils.

Wow. Personally, I’d never think to line up words in the way she does, but I’m willing to give it a try. Below is my rendition, which won’t make it into an actual essay because it’s got Karr’s voice not mine. However, the exercise helps me improve as a writer by showing me the choices I habitually make when I order words in a sentence. I’m now inspired to make considered choices, and expand the range of my voice.

Age fifteen, my hair in a careful bob and beads slung from my neck, unhindered by a real understanding of history, I joined my friends for our first Great Gatsby Party, ready to roar with the twenties. My best friend, who remains my best friend to this day—a friend who would write in my yearbook, “They’re a rotten crowd, you’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.”  She showed up in boa, and the crowd seemed to part, as she taught us to do the Charleston.

DO I SOUND LIKE ME? Find your own flow, and read aloud as you revise your drafts. Ask yourself again and again: does this sound like me? And, could I sound better? Now, go forth—read before you write, read aloud what you’ve written—and find your voice!

Happy (and mighty!) writing! Laurie

Friendly personalized College Application Essay help available at http://mightywriting.org/college-app-essay-coaching Contact Laurie Filipelli — laurie@mightywriting.org or 512-415-6882