#and now people want me to be open and honest and emotionally available

[extradimensionalsystem]

the desire to be the kind of person that can love myself vs. the absolute shame i have over the nature of my existence as someone born and raised into such horrible evil groups

[curseddollfaye]

toxic baby daddy! toji x reader headcanon

ᥫ᭡ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! ty! please let me know what you think! ^.^ requests are currently open!! ᥫ᭡

masterlist

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:· ੈ✩‧·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:· *ੈ✩‧₊˚

- you meet him through a friend of a friend. Your bestfriend Moonie insisting that you need to find someone! Although you had no issue in the looks department by any means. Men that tended to try and get your attention were just..meh. You knew what you wanted in a man and none of them could provide you with that.

- well, until you met him of course. you remember clear as day. Sitting in a very expensive restaurant where you were told to meet him at. Glancing around you expected a middle aged man to be your date. Probably expecting you to open your legs just because of where he planned to dine you. hah…

- and then he walked in , tall. 6’1 to be more precise. green eyes bore into yours as soon as he walked in. a scar decorated the corner of his right lip. and god was he muscular…so muscular. your legs might have squeezed shut instinctively

al

- if there was video recording of your face the entire night you might as well have the ground open up and swallow you hole. hearts practically taking your pupils face. you learned so much in such little time. his grin was surreal, the way the veins in his hands popped out whenever he grabbed hold of his steak knife to cut into his food.

- “So tell me a little bit about yourself sweetheart, I love hearing a pretty woman talk”

- safe to say you were a goner pretty quickly.

- and the feelings were mutual between you and him. you had him with your heel in his chest from the get go.

- long story short, you ended up dating not too long after. you learned about his ex wife who tragically passed away. you learned that he had a son named Megumi who was just shy of 3 when you met him, you learned Toji was a very wealthy business owner. Casinos and Clubs all across the country.

- He was older than you, but that didn’t bother you one bit.

- you ended up getting pregnant after two years of dating.

- splitting up wasn’t on your bucket list. But a few months after your daughter turned 3 months you had found some pictures hidden in Tojis wallet as you were grabbing his card to pay for family’s take-out dinner. His ex girlfriends face decorating each and every one of them, and her tits staring right back at you.

- a huge argument ensued. “Tch…come on baby. ‘Yer overreacting over something that doesn’t need it…” as soon as the words left his mouth he regretted them. your tear stained face was something he will never forget. Your beautiful smile replaced by something close to betrayal. To be honest Toji didn’t know how he would have reacted if the situation was flipped. He knew he fucked up. He just didn’t really know how to say sorry.

- he did feel bad. All they were, were just some silly Polaroids he meant to throw away after finding them in some old box in the garage.

- sure she was naked but it’s not like they turned him on. gross. only you did that to him.

- all night he tried, to no avail.

- “So you’re just not gonna eat because ‘yer mad at me? Don’t be ridiculous doll face” He scoffed a laugh and shook his head.

- “Hmm, fine then. I guess Rin and I will just eat alllll those stupid little candy snacks you like so much”

- “Ya think these cookies are expired? Wouldn’t want your man to die now do ya baby?”

- “go to hell Toji” you had slammed the door right in his face. you didn’t know what had hurt more. the intimacy of them or the way you had pushed out a 7 lb baby out of your vagina 3 months prior and were a wreck emotionally. your body and mind adjusting to having a tiny baby to look after. as well as a energetic 5 year old.

- he lets you go. because he doesn’t want you to be unhappy. even if it eats him up when you tell people you’re single.

- Or when you post your little thirst traps on Instagram (they’re just pictures or videos you post of yourself but Toji begs to fucking differ; you’re beautiful. they’re all thirst traps to him. he knows how men think)

- really you should have known better given his reputation of being a little bit of a player. but your heart outweighed the negative. oh well.

- you live and you learn…right?

- wrong.

- because even 2 years later you still let him fuck you. I mean who wouldn’t? He laid it down on you and you needed your fix even as a single mother. Who better to get it from than your asshole baby daddy?

- he doesn’t fuck anyone but you, states “ best pussy I’ve ever had. Why would I need someone else? Tch…silly girl”

- “fuck yeah…take me baby…heh…You like that? Hmm? Look at yourself in the fucking mirror and tell daddy how much you love his cock stretching out this tiny pussy sweetheart” fuck him and his big add hands holding your hips as he plows you from behind. unforgiving pace as he reminds you who you’re always going to belong to.

- still provides for you although you’re not together. Not only because he’s still batshit crazy about you and in love with you. You’re the mother of his child. Kids if we’re being real. Megumi loves you to death and you love him. He would never take that away from the both of you, which is why every month without fail an additional 300k is wired directly to your bank account. which is just spending money for you because he takes care of everything anyways… ‘the least he could do’ you have to mumble to yourself when the guilt eats you up of the outrageous amount of money he spends on you.

- Not that he would miss it anyways.

- generous and gorgeous

- is a DILF personified.

- watching him pick up your tiny daughter and press smooches all over her chubby cheeks when he comes to pick her up sends you into a spiral

- thoughts of giving him another one enter your mind for a sec…

- before you damn near concussed yourself from how hard you slapped your cheek to get rid of them.

- stays the night at your house often (when he feels like it) “You don’t want the kids to miss their daddy do you?” He throws you a stupid lazy grin.

- Which leads to nasty dirty fucking whenever the kids are tucked in their respected rooms and asleep.

- the next morning you find yourself in a situation when you’re date knocks on your door arriving just as planned to take you out for breakfast.

- A bouquet of flowers in your dates hands a smile graces his lips.

- When the door swung open and he was greeted with a bare chested irritated Toji. It quickly disappeared. Sweats hung low on his hips and his hair messy from last night’s activities. He fucked you so good you forgot how to walk.

- Toji blinked at the man standing in front of him. Of course Toji always made himself at home in your house. Not because he paid for it, but because if anything in his eyes you were still his. “You got lost on the way to jackass city or something? You know what time it is?” Toji grimaced in annoyance. Yawning lazily and scratching his bare chest. A lighter and a pack of cigarettess held in one hand.

- “Um..” your date watches as Toji smacks the red pack against his palm before taking one out and placing it in between his lips. Hands flickering the lighter as he heats up the end of his cigarette and take a drag. Toji’s green eyes locking into his.

- He figured out what the fuck was going on and he didn’t like it one bit. “You walk up these steps, ringing and knocking on the damn door while my kids and my woman are tryna sleep…” Toji blows the smoke in the poor guys face and flicks the ashes into the floor. A grin permanently on his face before he continues. Muscles flexing as his jaw clenches.

- “You must’ve lost ‘yer damn mind kid”

- Putting out the cigarette on an ashtray outside that’s sole purpose was just for Toji’s use. The door closes in your ex- dates face.

- Safe to say you don’t even remember you had a date and didn’t need a reminder when your date blocks you off his phone and deletes your number.

- toxic baby daddy! Toji who curses at himself and keeps himself up at night when he thinks about how badly he fucked it up with you. because throughout everything he still loves the hell out of you. you’re perfect in his eyes.

- and he’s determined to get you back.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Eddie Journals His Thoughts - A New Buddie Fanfic Series

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

New Buddie Fanfic - I'm still pissed about that BS "Vertigo" storyline because I hated it and I wish TM would have written something better for Eddie. There were several options but he just chose to use some wacky foolery because he likes it instead of considering the overall audience.

Eddie journals his thoughts: Entry #118 - Future Tense - Eddie journals about his future.

Eddie journals his thoughts: Entry #118 - Future Tense

5.3K Words; Rated: General Audiences

___________

Here's a snippet from Eddie's journal entry.

___________

He slowly nods as he remembers everything he said regarding his future, then he starts writing.

~~~

During my therapy session yesterday, Dr. Chandler asked me about my future and where I saw myself and I realized if she would have asked me that question back in May, I wouldn’t have been able to answer her.  Well… that’s not true because I would have been able to but I don’t think I would have been in the right headspace to respond since my life was such a mess.

But after almost four months of going to therapy at least twice per week, I can answer that question now and it makes me feel good.  For the first time ever, not only did I admit what I want but I said who I want too.  It took me years to get to a place where I can be open and honest about the life I thought I was supposed to have compared to the one I want.  When I was 18 and after Shannon said she was pregnant, I thought I had to listen to my parents and all those busybodies at church who said since we were doing things married people do, we should get married.

There were two issues with their comments. First, a lot of them made similar mistakes when they were younger but back then, they had parents who helped the girls hide their pregnancies by shipping them off to “boarding school”. And second, a lot of church people don’t live the lives they preach to others and say they’re supposed to live.  Behind closed doors some of them are living all kinds of wrong.

What else will Eddie include in this journal entry? 👀

___________

Eddie journal his thoughts: Entry #118 - Future Tense - Currently 1 Completed Work; 5.3K Words: Rated; General Audiences: This is part 1 in a new FANON series I’ve created and titled “Eddie Journals His Thoughts” and it will include several journal entries he writes as a healthy way to therapeutically process and work through the thoughts and feelings he had at the end of season 7.  Some of the things he writes will be heavy and emotionally angsty while others will be domestically and romantically fluffy.  As mentioned above, I HATED the way 9-1-1 didn’t let him talk to anyone about the way he was feeling at the end of 7x10 and it pissed me off when they let his parents abruptly show up and take Chris to El Paso, Texas with them.

Part 1: Eddie journals his thought: Entry #118 - Future Tense - Eddie journal about his future.

Now Available on AO3

[girltalkcollectives]

🦋 Learning to say NO: how I finally stopped being everyone's emotional support human (and you can too) 🦋

Ladies, we need to talk about something that's been weighing on my heart lately. You know that feeling when your phone lights up with yet another friend drama, and your stomach immediately ties itself into knots? When you find yourself giving advice at 2 AM while your own life is falling apart? When you're everyone's shoulder to cry on, but somehow can't find a shoulder for yourself?

Yeah. That was me. The designated therapist friend. The one who dropped everything to be there for others. The one who felt guilty for even thinking about saying "no."

But here's the thing: being everyone's emotional support person was slowly drowning me. And I bet some of you know exactly what I'm talking about.

So today, I want to share my journey of learning to set boundaries without feeling like I'm somehow betraying the entire universe. (Spoiler alert: the universe is doing just fine!)

The Breaking Point

It hit me during a particularly chaotic week. I was juggling three different friend crises, trying to meet a school deadline, and hadn't done laundry in… well, let's not talk about that. I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and honestly? Pretty resentful.

That's when I realized: by trying to be there for everyone, I wasn't really there for anyone – especially not myself.

The Uncomfortable Truth

Here's what I've learned: Setting boundaries isn't selfish – it's necessary. It's not about building walls; it's about creating healthy doors that you can open and close as needed.

Some hard truths I had to accept:

Other people's emergencies are not automatically my emergencies

Saying "no" doesn't make me a bad friend

I can care about someone without sacrificing my own wellbeing

People who truly love me will respect my boundaries

The Baby Steps

Starting small was key. Here's how I began:

I stopped responding to non-emergency texts immediately

I learned to say "I can't talk right now, but can we catch up tomorrow?"

I started being honest about my capacity: "I love you, but I'm not in a headspace to give advice right now"

I designated specific times for deep conversations instead of being available 24/7

The Surprising Results

You know what happened? The world didn't end. In fact:

My real friends totally got it and started respecting my time more

I had energy to actually help when it really mattered

My anxiety decreased significantly

I started sleeping better (who knew setting boundaries could be better than melatonin?)

I finally had time to work on my own growth

The Plot Twist

Here's the beautiful irony: by setting boundaries, I've actually become a better friend. I'm more present when I am available. I give better advice because I'm not emotionally exhausted. And most importantly? I'm modeling healthy behavior for the women in my life.

The Ongoing Journey

Look, I'm not perfect at this yet. Sometimes I still slip into old patterns. Sometimes guilt still creeps in. But I'm learning that it's okay to be a work in progress.

To all my fellow recovering people-pleasers out there, remember:

Your worth isn't measured by your availability

"No" is a complete sentence

You can't pour from an empty cup

Someone else's lack of planning isn't your emergency

Your mental health matters just as much as everyone else's

Moving Forward

If you're reading this and feeling seen, know that you're not alone. Setting boundaries is hard, especially for us women who've been conditioned to be nurturers and caretakers. But it's also one of the most powerful forms of self-love.

Start small. Be gentle with yourself. And remember that you deserve the same care and consideration that you so freely give to others.

[ndrmda]

i’m gonna preface this by saying my brain’s fuckin cooked, like on chronic levels, so in case you notice grammar errors and shit along the way, please know that it’s because of that ( and my lack of respect for the english language ). ANW, hello, loves! i’m milk ( 23, any ). i was supposed to be in the opening with yall but i scrapped my baby sejun ( bxf1 ) at the last minute bc i felt like i wouldn’t be able to do him justice soz ( idk jack shit about tennis ok ). but ig thank god he rip-ed bc then u wouldn’t meet my girlfailure gal JIHYE if he stayed, amirite? 😏 below the cut are well, stuff. tidbits. like!! because you like me ofc & my d*sc*rd is totally available upon req if any of you want to concoct delicious plans over there.

background & personality ( here for the in-depth, sorta decently written, not stroke inducing thing ) ( tw for domestic violence )

basics : 2019 queen ( kxe1 ), daughter of seoul’s commissioner general and a well-known lawyer, the people’s princess

inspired by a lot of things but i would say off the top of my head, she’s like if alicent hightower, sansa stark, cassie howard, amy dunne’s husband issues, shiv roy’s parental AND HUSBAND issues, charli xcx’s brat, & sofia coppola’s filmography are all rolled into one, tied with a miu miu ribbon

your typical rich girl blah blah blah princess syndrome…. oblivious to the plight of the poor….. lives off of daddy’s money…… YOU KNOW IT

she’s def smarter than she lets on but her interests don’t dabble in what most people deem intellectual, so she just lets them think what they want to think bc honestly who gaf

when a girlboss marries a pig of a man, you get one traumatized brat. that’s just the formula

a daughter typically looks up to her mother but not when her mother allows herself to be submitted to the violent whims of her husband. bonus points for irony if her mother is a womens rights lawyer

and don’t get her started with her father. she feels nothing for him but ONLY fear. worst man on earth i hope he d words

jihye is outwardly sweet. well yes, she’s self-absorbed at times and maybe bitchy but not always on purpose. overall she’s an angel. which is to say she’s used to getting whatever she wants because people simply like her yk who could say no to that gorgeous face? ( actively weaponized pretty privilege iktr )

but then that’s the problem because it’s so easy for her to get away with anything & everything dun dun dun dun

underneath the nice girl facade tho is her deep-seated resentment and an unquenchable thirst to be loved that stemmed from her abusive home, which she would carry up to her dysfunctional married life…… girlie just can’t catch a break i fear

really just wanted a happy ever after that doesn’t involve being treated like a subhuman

but oh well she should be thankful for the social security right? ( lights a cigarette )

fast forward to 2024….. ultimately, she is her mother’s child through and through. there is a quote by oscar wilde that pretty much sums up how jihye’s life came to be and it goes: “all women become their mothers. that is their tragedy.” ( sighs and smokes )

met her husband through a betrothal set up by her father and while at the start it was okay ig bc what choice did she have, it started going downhill as he got promoted in the office. he’s different from her father in some ways, but he’s still a shit husband, equally dismissive and emotionally abusive if not more ( smokes up to the filter )

she’s divorcing him now btw so yay good for her honestly ( and is currently setting her eyes on a prize she thinks she solely deserves 👀 )

plots & connections

while i’d like to say i just wanted to keep this intro short and sweet, i’m gonna be honest with you all and hold your hands as i confess that i have no plots planned whatsoever prior to this post, aside from what’s stated in the canon ( and some things plotted with the lovely muns who have approached me so far ). that said, my scatterbrained brain works when it’s stimulated so i’d rather we brainstorm than list the cliche things i can whip up by myself bc trust me, they’re terrible. also, i think that way, we can tailor-fit plots to our desires, yeah? i’m a mess & i’m just babbling at this point but everyone has been nothing but warm and welcoming, so i love yall! i cant wait to plot with each & everyone of you!!!

[affectiondeficitdisorder]

NOBODY WANTS THIS... least of all me

by Ethlie Ann Vare

Funny story. Back in my hopeless romantic days, I was always writing love stories. Sometimes this was hard to do, as I was pigeonholed as an “action-adventure” screenwriter. So I would write a cop show and have the detective fall in love with a suspect, or a victim. The con man had to fall for his mark. The bounty hunter fell for his prey. When I wrote for the science fiction series Gene Roddenberry’s Andromeda, I had a space ship fall in love with another space ship. Seriously. They were the ship’s android AI avatars caught in a Romeo and Juliet story called, naturally, Star-Crossed. 

I just watched it again; it’s available on free TV channels like Pluto, Tubi and Philo. It’s not bad, if you can stomach VFX circa 2001. But boy, can you tell it was written by a love addict! Everybody is horny for everybody, and love is always at first sight. “When I look at you, my breath catches in my throat and my heart swells in my chest until my ribs hurt,” says Gabriel, the handsome humanoid avatar of one spaceship. “I don’t want to live without you.”

They kiss. Romantic music plays. They kiss some more. They Matrix themselves into the mainframe and have virtual sex. “I’ve never felt like this before and I don’t want it to end,” says Rommie, the beautiful humanoid avatar of the other spaceship. They pledge their intention to give up their livelihoods, if not their lives, for one another within hours of that first kiss. 

Now, I don’t want to say my dialog did it — as sincere as it was at the time, what with me being so enmeshed in my fantasies of true love — but the actors playing the lovesick avatars, Lexa Doig and Michael Shanks, ended up falling in love themselves. They’re still married to this day. It was a real life Hollywood Ending. 

Lexa and Michael, if you read this… you’re welcome. 

But I’m not the lovesick puppy I was in 2001. If anything, I have become the anti-Hollywood Ending lady. I’ve written magazine articles about it. There’s a chapter in LOVE ADDICT: Sex, Romance and Other Dangerous Drugs about it. I’m the one warning you that a romcom for a love addict is like a Budweiser ad for an alcoholic: It makes something look really, really good that has the potential to be really, really bad. The beer commercial shows the pretty people in the bar laughing, not the drunk puking in the bathroom the next morning. The romcom shows the meet-cute and the wedding chapel, not the bruised lady filing a restraining order six months later.

Which is why I had to be dragged like a dog to the groomer to Netflix to watch Nobody Wants This, the hit series about the star-crossed mismatch between a handsome young rabbi and a sex and relationship podcaster… a blonde, not remotely Jewish podcaster. They’re not exactly the AI avatars of opposing warships, but close enough.

I didn’t want to like it. I really didn’t. But I did. So why did this work for me when I am so resistant to the cultural trope of the romcom? Probably because the series is written by an actual shiksa who is married to an actual rabbi. It feels real because it’s about real people, who are honest and open with each other and confront their feelings like real people, just with snappier quips. 

“My biggest fear is a bad facelift,” says Joanne, “but I think I'm realizing an even bigger fear is this: that I will become emotionally dependent on a guy who will one day realize that I'm too much and break my heart.” Who hasn’t felt like that? (Not the facelift part, dear one. You are perfect and will never age.)

You know the old line “love means never having to say you’re sorry?” It’s bullshit. Lovers are not mind readers. These guys apologize all the time. They make mistakes, they take responsibility for their mistakes, they make amends, they move forward. What a concept!

Kristen Bell plays the smart, funny, wildly insecure agnostic Joanne; Adam Brody plays the sensitive, spiritual, emotionally available rabbi Noah. The series was created by Erin Foster, wife of Rabbi Simon Tikhman. And while I’m sure she never crossed herself in synagogue like Joanne does — actually, I can’t imagine any adult living in Los Angeles being that clueless — Foster is using the stuff of real life to make her comedy. 

She’s using her own marriage. She’s using her creative relationship with her real-life sister. And I suspect she’s using the lessons she learned from watching her dad, music industry powerhouse David Foster, marry and divorce five times, give or take a time. (Yes, his current wife is younger than his daughter. Yes, I used to play a gossip on E! Entertainment Television’s The Gossip Show.) The relationships in Nobody Wants Thisfeel healthy. These days I like healthy, especially when it’s funny.

In the chapter of LOVE ADDICT where I talk about the way pop culture glorifies love addiction (and I was part of the problem!), I wrote: “I’m not lobbying for pop songs with lyrics like ‘Oh, baby, I love the way you communicate’ and ‘Rock me with your integrity, daddy, all night long.’” But maybe there’s a place for that, too. As long as it has a good beat and you can dance to it.

Nobody Wants This has been renewed for a second season. I will be watching. Join me.

[bestofsophieturner]

I agree with you and anon. But as I understood, Sophie is not dating anyone yet, she is single, but open to new relationships. It seems to be from one of Sophie's representatives: https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/inside-sophie-turners-dating-status-after-peregrine-pearson-pics/ https://pagesix.com/2023/11/01/entertainment/sophie-turner-keeping-her-options-open-after-kissing-aristocrat-report/ And to be honest, I think since she was in England back since April, and since the divorce, she seems happier, I think Joe was putting a damper on her mental health and she only realized it when they were apart, but she thought that if they move to England everything will change, but Joe is so narcissistic and selfish that he doesn't want to change and compromise, he wants people changed and compromised just for him. I am glad that she is free from him and her daughter too and I hope that Sophie will have more custody and the children will live with her all the time and see Joe sometimes, he is a bad father who only wants to use them.

Hello !

I don't know if it's from her representatives. But from my perspective, it makes sense that she's not dating for now. I mean, she's divorcing and she must have so much on her mind right now. It must be hard to be emotionally available for a serious relationship. Well, it's only my thoughts. Maybe I'm wrong.

About Joe... The way the whole thing happened doesn't sit well with me. First, they signed a document to buy an house in July. Then, not even two months later, he filled for divorce. And he did it while she was in UK filming. It's a shitty move. And everything he said/or did about/to his exgirlfriends came to light again. There's definitely something wrong with the guy...

I did notice the media are still trying to paint Joe as the doting father and Sophie as the bad mother. When the sun posted this picture of Sophie kissing Peregrine, the picture has been taken 4 or 5 days ago. And with the picture, they shared several pictures of Joe walking the children for Halloween. And I was like "seriously ?" This didn't work before, why did they think it could work now ?

Well, I just hope they will leave alone. I just want peace and happiness for Sophie.

[itssoinevitable]

Hiii 👋 I just wanted to say I’ve been a fan of your blog since the good ole Downton Days and I’m so chuffed you’re a ACGAS fan too! Tbf right now the fandom is super down in the dumps (me included). How are you remaining so positive since Audrey x Gerald development in the Christmas Special?

Hi Anon! Thanks for your message, and happy holidays! So nice to hear from our old Downton Abbey crew again, I think a lot of us migrated here.

To be honest, there are a few reasons I’m not worried. (Sorry, it’s long).

1) Because I honestly love Siegfried and Audrey as friends and surrogate family. Their bond is special and beautiful, whether or not it ever becomes romantic. (Although I hope it does). They are life partners, involved in all the most important parts of each other’s lives. They have coparented Tristan (and James and Jess), they’re each other’s confidant and source of comfort. That’s special in and of itself.

2) Because I actually think they’re playing the (really, really) long game with them. I could be wrong, but that seems to be what the writers are doing. It seems quite intentional. 3 years on screen together may seem a while for some, and I suppose she’s been his housekeeper for around 7 years so it feels like ages. But imo, the best slow burns imo are the ones where you’re never quite sure if they will or won’t. It’s the little crumbs they leave scattered here and there, it’s the longing looks and angsty build up that makes it so delicious tbh. I just hope they get renewed for enough seasons to see it through. (Plus I am a Carson & Mrs Hughes fan, so 3 seasons doesn’t feel that long! Lol)

3) And lastly, because I don’t actually think they’re ready to be together yet. They’re still in the process of getting there.

Siegfried has probably had to longest way to go, in terms of being emotionally ready to realise, admit and accept that he has feelings for his housekeeper. In Season 1, he opened himself up to intimacy and the possibility of love again. He did that with Dorothy and then Diana, (although who knows why she’s been such a non-entity this last season. Maybe the actress wasn’t available?) And now, at the end of S3, he literally just resolved one of his biggest character arcs - his complex relationship and feelings for Tristan (and even then, only with a lot of encouragement and support from Audrey). He’s emotionally levelled up.

Now, I think it’s Audrey’s turn. Gerald befriending her/ pursuing her has allowed her to imagine she could be with someone again, after leaving her husband. It helps her relationship with Edward is also on the mend, since that’s been a source of so much guilt and pain for her. As for her feelings toward Gerald, they do seem to have deepened somewhat suddenly. I know some people said it felt very out of blue considering she had friendzoned him. But maybe she liked him all along and simply didn’t feel she could be more than friends, much as she wanted to. Or maybe it was brought on by the war, and him moving away. Either way, I think he’s a good man, simple and uncomplicated, which is just what she needs as she’s testing the waters of romance again. I think he’s also serving as a catalyst for Siegfried to realise the depth of his feelings for Audrey, which is v exciting imo.

Siegfried is also a good man, but things with him are as ever, more complicated. Their status as employer and employee, and long time friends also raises the stakes a lot more. Considering she’s a lot more self-aware, I think Mrs Hall knows she might have certain feelings for Siegfried (seemed a bit disapproving / jealous of his relationships) but I don’t think she has considered it could go anywhere. I feel that this budding relationship with Gerald will be pivotal in a shift between them. It might motivate her to get her divorce from Mr Hall, and resolve that source of pain from her past, too.

TL;DR All that said, I think they’re getting where to need to be, and I think we should enjoy the journey. It’ll be all the more sweet if and when it happens.

[mydysfunctionalvampirefamily]

Stop, I cannot. Miles put so mu h thought in Johnny's room. 😭😭😭😭 The clothes, the posters, the cassette player.

Oh Wynn, your dad's flannel.

Someone talked about Miles's haven like the tower Caleb made in critical role. And I can't unsee it now and it makes me so emotional! These two emotionally stunted idiots telling the people they love how much they care about them. 😭😭 I will never be over this.

Of course Wynn, the most emotionally available one in the group recognises exactly what this is.

Britta's closet nest, and not getting out of it. 😭 Baby girl.

Ira, sir. 👀 We are getting some deep feelings and lore from you.

I have to be honest, I am unsure what the aster is exactly.

"you're not bad for a tremere," compliment of the highest order from Johnny.

Oh no, what's going on with Miles??? Why does he feel like part of him is left in the chantry??

Super casual, slacks and a button up. 😂 I love that that is the most casual Miles can imagine getting.

Oh no the mental attack!! Poor Miles, that sounds awful, the mirror.

Wow Miles being honest and open about the psychic attack, personal growth, even if he is so casual about it.

If Wynn and Johnny compliment you, you know it's true.

It's moments like this I remember that Wynn studied psychology.

Why is Delgado in new York?

Traitors within the sabat? I have a feeling that is quite rare.

Neil!!! Oh no. This is bad.

Okay but why does the Miles and Britta talk have such strong dad talks to his teenage daughter after she has been dumped by the love of her life energy?

Lmaoooo the rest has been talking about Neil being missing, and they haven't even tried calling him??? 😂

Whethers and Johnny talking to each other is always such a delight.

All the emotional unavailability Miles keeps for himself, he is so good with the others. 😭

👀👀 Talking about the prince dying and Miles becoming prince.

Why does Neil keep running into people he wouldn't remember?? 😂😂 Also at those two really being vampires now.

A mortal?? With the sabat? 🤔

Also how do they know Miles is a diablerist???

Ohh a mortal being piloted around by a vampire. That makes more sense.

Lmao Lucida is a badass.

Wait Reiss got promoted in all of this???? No!!

What is Reiss's angle? He is just such a fucking shithead. Saying Ira did so good and telling them about Eden. I hate that he is so smart about all of this. I just want him to die.

Also congratulations on the promotion! I guess?

Now look at this boy, telling the truth despite it all. That is some wholesome snitch energy.

Wait so Ira needs to take Eden?? Lmao good luck taking her away from Wynn, you're gonna need it.

[laniakearose]

A letter

Hey man, do you have some free time this week? That morning at your place left a bitter taste on my tongue and a heavy feeling on my shoulders and I can't shake it off alone. I really need to talk to you.

First, I want to just ask you to hold space for my feelings as I did for yours, because you know I am not in a good place, too. And I have a lot shit that I am dealing with and I need to deal with in the near future.

I am not the one to talk about what this is or could be, as you know, I feel like I am disconnected from everything. But I do know how our last meeting made me feel.

You told me how you felt used until something else, something better comes along - funny, that is exactly how I felt that morning. I don't know if you consciously or subconsciously projected that on me, but that is exactly how it felt. You left me confused. Because the night before you told me many lovely things and the most important one is that you felt safe with me. And I appreciate that.

But then you brought up the other girl. Which is fine, we are not in a relationship and you did what I asked you to...You've been honest. So, thanks. But I realised something about myself. I cannot be there for you emotionally while you're figuring out how you feel about other girl(s). I cannot be both your therapist friend and your friend with benefit.

I am a high value woman and I love and respect myself. And I demand respect from people I am involved with. I don't know if I said or did something that triggered you, but I felt you pushed me away that morning. You pulled me close that night, then you maybe saw the real me and not just a fantasy, and you pushed me away. That is how I percieve it.

You said some things that cleary put a veto on a possible relationship between us. It's not often that I think about having a real, commited monogamous relationship with you in the future but that is what made me feel that you are just having sex with me and having slow evenings, funny conversations and craving cuddles with me because it's the only thing available right now. Not because you see me as a real person, with real feelings. Not because you like me. Just because you know I'd show up.

Seems like I can only be that emotionally invested with the person I am sleeping with if they are also my partner. Not just a fuck buddy.

When it comes to real monogamous relationships I am like you. It's only us, against the world.

But seems like the thought of it triggers you. Because you said you could never date a bi girl, because you'd feel inadequate. I understand. And I don't think you can change that. I don't know. And you also compared me to your ex. That made me uncomfortable.

It hurt. Like I said, I don't want to use people, I don't want to use you, while I figure my shit out and I don't want you to use me, either. So, would you like to put a pause on this situationship and explore other options?

I don't want to see anybody else. But I have a lot of pain I need to process, plus the break up, plus the move. So... I don't know. I don't think I have the capacity right now, to deal with more complicated emotions. I really like you. That morning really hurt. I liked how you opened up to me the night before, but I hated how you pushed me away after.

I really cherish our connection and I think it's rare.

At least for me. The compatibility, the chemistry...everything. Maybe you just don't feel the same. And that is okay. But it's not fair. I don't wish more pain to you nor myself. And I don't want to feel like a dealer of cheap dopamine.

Maybe it's the wrong time for us, again.

What do you think?

P.S. Thanks for listening.

[mesillusionssousecstasy]

Gossip Girl Reboot 2x04: Quotes

- “I’m gonna take you behind the scenes of moments that looked perfect but were actually painful. Curated instead of experienced. (...) for the truth about how hard “marking it look easy” is on the people who love you.” (Julien)

- “Well, I used to use it to perpetuate a whole bunch of lies to help people feel bad about themselves. But now I’m trying this thing called honestly, you know? Pulling back the façade. Exposing the lies beneath.” (Julien)

- “I simply thought I would extend it as a sort of interpersonal olive branch to repair whatever wrong foot she and I got off on. (Kate) - Right, because telling someone their husband is cheating on them always makes them like you.” (Wendy)

- “First he shuts down in bed, and now he’s lying to us. My spidey senses are tingling, Hope. And not in a good way.” (Max)

- “I felt that chill from here. (Audrey) - Okay, so it’s not just me. (Julien) - No. No. He’s definitely avoiding you. Just like old times!” (Audrey)

- “Are they on the agenda? (Monet) - It’s just one simple question. We don’t need an appointment for that. (Shan) - Have you ever heard of precedence? If we do it for you, we have to do it for anyone. And we do not do things for anyone. Do I look like Cupid for poors? Kindly move along. (Monet) - The lower steps are getting bold.” (Monet’s minion)

- “Queen D, I know your dress code said only designer khakis, but Matches, Mr. Porter, and Essence sold out in my sample size, so I had no choice but to Rag and Bone. I kneel before thee as a sign of remorse. It’ll never happen again.” (Student in front of Monet)

- “They’re expecting to be excoriated. (Monet’s minion) - Were you actually serious? (Monet’s minion) - What.. When am I ever not? Yes, I mean, too many restrictions is turning people against me. (Monet) - If you want what she has, you have to rule with an open hand. Not an iron fist.” (Luna)

- “Hey, it’s fine. He’s just a guy. No. He... iIt’s just a distraction from all the shit in my life. It’s not real.” (Zoya)

- “I mean, who’s even paying for them? Make-a-Wish?” (Monet)

- “Luna, what would you do? (Monet) - Recast?” (Luna)

- “As promised, I’m here taking your questions about love, loneliness, and the moments in between. Questions are open.” (Julien) 

- “So if you want someone to hate... (Zoya) - Right. Here’s the thing. Why give you his phone number when he’s just going to say no? Haven’t you heard I’m benevolent now? I’m sparing you pain.” (Monet) 

- “If she won’t give it up, we’ll just have to take it.” (Shan)

- “Ooh. This comment’s interesting. “Have you ever been interested in someone who was unavailable?” (Julien) - Trick question. Is anyone ever emotionally available? (Luna) - Do dead men count? What? No way I’m alone here.” (Audrey)

- “You say a word of this to anyone, I’ll have you all exiled to Exeter. All of you.” (Monet)

- “I want fresh ginger tea. And when I say fresh ginger, I mean make it yourself.” (Monet)

- “Besides, it’s your word against mine, and your word means nothing anymore.” (Grace)

- “Dating before Valentine’s Day is just a game of musical chairs. Seats swap, partners change, and options are eliminated.” (Gossip Girl)

- “Being liked is awful.” (Monet)

- “I had to see more. (Max) - Just be honest with us. (Audrey) - We can get through anything if we’re honest with each other. (Max) - From the two people who secretly tailed me, violated my privacy, and tried to break into my phone? Is that the kind of honestly you mean? Yeah, that’s what I fucking thought.” (Aki)

- “Dad! Have you no sense of decency or discretion?” (Monet)

- “That’s not it at all. I’ve just... I’ve just been a little messed up lately, and... (Shan) - And you wanted me to feel as miserable as you do? (Zoya) - Well, maybe I’m miserable because I’m keeping a fucking secret I shouldn’t be!” (Shan)

- “Your privilege has afforded you the ability to live your life as a proud, out, young Black woman in a country where none of those things come easily. But they come easily for you because of me. So you have no right to question how your father and I live our lives, just like we have never... questioned how you live yours. My only regret is that you chose a public place to make a mess. But that is what you are growing into. A mess.” (Monet’s mother)

- “Even I didn’t see that twincest coming.” (Luna)

- “The parents are the true monsters. The kids are simply modeling their behaviour.” (Kate)

- “What if I don’t want to be loved? Love only exposes you to trouble. Isn’t it better to hate and be hated? (Monet) - No. Not at all. (Luna) - I want to be loved. (Monet) - Me, too. Me fucking too.” (Luna)

- “There’s no such thing as a love story. Because for it to be a story, it would have to have a beginning, a middle, and an end. And love doesn’t end. It changes. It grows. It dims, and it dies. But even then, it’s never over. It lives in your shadows, waiting to wake you in the middle of the night... to tap you on your shoulder when you least expect it. A splinter you can never get out. Each love is a crime that haunts us and we pile up crimes as we go. And while we tell ourselves we’ll never get caught, we know we always will. It’s only a matter of time till we commit our next crime. And this one, we swear... will be our last.” (Gossip Girl)

[lostinthewoods1991]

Little Everyday Lessons

A few days ago, I was talking about teaching, to a few guests at home. I've always told people that I'm not cut out for the job. I still struggle with many aspects of it. However, something has changed. To my own surprise, I've grown to like my job. I had to go away and do something that felt utterly meaningless, to arrive at this place where I perceive teaching very differently. I don't know if age has anything to do with it but earlier, I was constantly worried about how my students would perceive me. To be honest, children used to like me, though I considered myself a bad teacher. But, their liking wasn't of much help when I used to feel like a child myself. I would always find myself struggling internally, trying to live up to everything I thought must define a teacher. More often than not, I'd feel as though it was a performance. Today, when I stand facing a class, I am aware that I'm seeing the people in front of me, as much as I am seeing myself through their eyes. My insecurities become an indistinct chatter in the distance. I'm more focused on them than on myself. It's a simple shift of perspective but it didn't happen overnight. I am aware that I still do not fit the conventional standards of good/bad for a teacher. I used to be very apologetic about it. But now, I don't feel the need to apologise much for the things I say/do from a true conscience. Coming back to my conversation with the guests, I was told how I must assert my power more. How teaching is a mind game. How teaching is about not showing one's vulnerability. How teachers are not even necessary, given all the information in the world is readily available to children. So, we must impose on them the idea that we are needed. Honestly? Since when did teaching become so much about oneself? About power? About manipulating children into seeing you a certain way? About playing with their feelings? About reducing them into effective puppets in your hands?

I have so much more to learn but if I know anything, it's that the role of a teacher is definitely not about cramming heads with information. Textbooks, especially in subjects like literature, are only gateways, aren't they? You can claim you've done justice to the subject only if you leave the gateways open for them to walk through, only if you encourage them to perceive alternate realities, to be critical and questioning of narratives, to be empathetic and sensitive, to be kinder human beings. I don't think there will ever come a time when teachers aren't needed but I'm not sure how many teachers can call themselves good, in this sense. I know I still have a long way to go before I can call myself a good teacher. For now, all I know is, as a teacher, I refuse to be anything other than honest. I don't want to pretend I know more than I do. I don't want to play mind games. I don't want to intimidate my children. Instead, I want to be vulnerable and human. I want to be able to make mistakes. I want to be able to apologise if I've hurt them in some way. I want to be able to challenge their ways of thinking, but I want them to feel free to question me if I say something outdated. I want them to feel emotionally safe with me. So no, I do not intend to "toughen myself up" to be taken seriously as a teacher. I'm aiming for the opposite. I only want to be a softer, humbler and kinder human being. I don't know how far I'll succeed, but I think it's worth trying.

[sunnysatyr]

If anyone reads this and takes it personally, please be aware that I’m not targeting you or anyone specifically. This is just something I wrote to put my thoughts into words, speaking in the most general and broad sense. So…

Every now and then, I read generic pieces of advice or validation, like "It's human to need affection; it doesn't mean you're needy or clingy" or "It's OK to push toxic people away from you." While these sentiments can be helpful, they can also be dangerous.

Maybe it's just me, and I'm speaking from my own context and experiences, but sometimes I feel the need to add a disclaimer: "Hey, before validating your need for affection, have you considered where it comes from? Could it be toxic dependence, or is it really neglect? Are you seeking attention from emotionally mature and available people, or are you focusing on something that will hurt you in the long run?” Or perhaps, "Do you know if there’s anything wrong with the people you consider toxic? Are they OK? Are you being mutually toxic? Is there a chance to sit down and show them empathy and communicate before drawing a line between you and them? Are they willing to extend the same empathy and communication to you?”

I don't want to invalidate anyone's feelings because sometimes people do need these messages in their lives. However, in my life, I’ve encountered many people who lack the ability to be responsible and accept their own role in others’ attitudes towards them. Friends push friends away without giving each other a chance for honest and open communication; couples break up because they cannot understand each other’s perspectives.

So, coming back to generic pieces of advice, I really believe there’s nothing wrong with them; only, please take them with a pinch of salt. If you really need the validation that comes from a random sentence taken out of context on social media, maybe you need something else entirely, like therapy, or advice from someone with whom you have a healthier relationship and who can give you more personalized, healthy advice.

[eliink]

(𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒆)

Why do I feel like every time I try my best, I still fail? I'm always there for people I truly care about, trying my best to be a great friend for them. But do they really appreciate me? Do they appreciate me because I truly helped them, or because they just appreciate that I can free my time for them every time they needed me? I am emotionally, mentally, and physically available for other people, but for myself… I don’t know. I tend to sacrifice everything for other people without thinking if they truly deserve it. I hate that I care too much and get attached, even though I don't have to. I always say I could easily detach myself, but when it comes to the actual situation, I just couldn't stop crying anymore. Yes, people come and go, but why? Is my presence not enough? Or is there something lacking in me? I am known as the jokester, energetic, and as an emotionally intelligent person, but when it comes to dealing with my own shit, I always fail. I am proud of myself for giving good advice to people, but applying those in my own situation is more difficult than it seems.

I never take the risk because I know if it fails, I can't deal with the consequences anymore. Maybe one of the reasons why I still haven't found someone for me yet (although it's not that important) is because I'm the problem. I don't want to risk something. It's not because they're not worth the risk; it's because I overthink too much. I can't focus on the present moments with them; I tend to overthink our future and the uncertainties that might happen. I stop myself from taking the risk because I'm scared that my past will just repeat itself.

At this point, I don’t know how to love someone anymore. I focus too much on loving and empowering myself to the point that I don't need someone with me anymore. But the real thing is, I also need to feel genuine love from someone that I never feel from my mom, dad, siblings, and family. I don’t know who to love anymore because of my trauma. I generalize all the boys that come into my life now. "They're all the same. Them caring about me will also pass as well as their feelings." My mind is stuck in the saying "prevention is better than cure"; for me to prevent getting more attached, I'll just distance myself even though it hurts me. If that shitty situation happens again, I don’t know who to ask for help anymore.

Why can't I just have a fun talk with somebody!? I always bring up some depressing shit that might bore them, and then they think I'm emo or edgy. I know most of my friends told me that they can be there for me 24/7, but I can't just vent everything to them; they have to deal with their own conflicts too. So what now? Why can't I just live peacefully and leave my past in the past? I swear to God, my life is just a cycle of bullshit experiences that happen to me over and over again. Can I avoid it? Am I manifesting it to happen again? Is this another challenge from God for me? Is it my fault? Is that why it's happening again? I don’t know anymore. That doesn't mean your friend is always there for you; you can vent anytime. Give boundaries and respect their time too. If you take too much, they might judge you.

When will it be my turn to be their priority and to be loved? I want someone who thinks that we both deserve each other. I don’t care if we don't have similarities as long as we can make and build our relationship together. As long as we help each other grow, I'm okay with it. As long as we're both honest and trust each other, I'm okay with it. Is this too much to ask?

______________________________________________________________

I will be making more rants series coz it helps me to unwind and pour all my emotions through writings. This is how I handle my feelings, instead of covering my face with a pillow, sobbing, ranting in front of my 3ft. bear, I just open my notes or get a pen and paper to express what I feel. This really helps me. Sometimes I look back at my notes, read it and I feel a satisfied that I get through that with a little pity for myself since I've been through that phase.

[keonaskrises]

I'm not in a krisis right now... At least I think I'm not because usually there's more mental turmoil . Right now is just looming exams which usually brings on the usual fear panic stress anxiety but nothing too out of the ordinary for this time period 😋

The closest thing I have to a dilemma is that I'm ata crossroads of wanting love - the idea of it I believe - but also being profoundly emotionally unavailable, or unwilling to be very available.

Andy argues that it's just a matter of meeting the right person, and to be honest I agree. But I do think it then sets a high standard in my mind of what this person should be like. Not in the sense that I want this person to have "everything" but just highly specific to me& what I like.

So perhaps my greater issue is am I holding out for feeling very strongly about a very specific person and is that ok? Or should I just take things as they come and give people a chance

The thing is I'm not very good at liking things I don't like, especially not with romantic feelings about people. If I get to the point where I like someone, the downbadness of it all is inescapable... I think recently that has made it a deterrent for me to actually feel open (again not that I've really had the chance to tbh).

Conclusions

I have a specific standard

I'm not going to worry about whether this specific is too hard for any person to reach

Im going to try and stay open to getting to know people as genuine friends first & if I like someone's vibes I can possibly pursue that vibe

Work on myself 🤡

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

055 of 2023

Have you ever dated someone who was emotionally or mentally unstable?

Yeah, my first ex. It was tough.

Be honest: are you clingy?

No, I need my space. But I enjoy other people’s company, as long as I know and trust them.

Have you ever had bronchitis?

I haven’t.

What was the last thing you purchased?

Train ticket to Oostende. I travel a lot recently.

Your most treasured and precious photo? (post or describe)

Probably this one:

Have you ever had a reptile for a pet?

No, and I’ve never been interested.

Have you ever seen any of the Great Lakes?

Never been to the US nor Canada.

Ever swam in a river?

Not swam, but I was in the river.

Coke or Pepsi?

Coke all the way.

Are you afraid of the dentist?

Very much so.

Did you attend Sunday School as a child?

No, there’s no such thing here.

Have you ever smoked a cigarette?

No, not even tried.

Have you ever been pulled aside by security at the airport?

Never been at any airport.

Who was the last person you cuddled with?

My husband, but it was two nights ago.

What is your favourite seasonal candy (only available at certain times)?

I’m not a candy person.

Do you know anyone who is fluent in a second tongue?

Yeah, myself. And basically everyone who lives in this area. Our language is Dutch, but we all speak English as well, and many of us also speak French.

What is the scariest movie you’ve ever seen and who did you watch it with?

I don’t watch movies.

How would you feel if your significant other (or possible partner) told you they dislike having sex, but do so with you to make you happy, even though they personally think it’s a chore?

Well, I am that significant other. Better ask my husband how he feels about it :P but honestly, I’d be relieved if I wasn’t the only ace in my relationship.

What stories are an absolute must read for your children/possible future children?

Not planning any children, thanks.

What are some of your favorite monologues?

What?

What breed was the last dog you saw?

I don’t know, something small, noisy and very annoying.

If a bug is in your car, do you kill it or try to push it out your window?

I just open the window and let it fly out.

Your boyfriend/girlfriend isn’t around but their phone is. Do you look through it?

Nope, I trust him. I’m allowed to do it, but I feel no need to do so.

Who’s the biggest whore you know?

I don’t know and I don’t care.

Do people ever think you’re older/younger than you actually are?

Younger, even much younger. I’m often being mistaken for a teenager, but I’m actually in my 30s. Maybe if I grown a beard, it’d be different :P but my facial hair is nothing to brag about, honestly.

What is your current status?

Upper working class and married.

Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?

Yeah, on the right side.

Have you ever had a life-threatening injury?

Yeah, I suffered brain haemorrhage.

Do you prefer an ocean or pool?

Ocean, hands down. The sea man always returns to the sea.

Do you shut off the water while you brush your teeth?

I don’t. I should be more considerate.

Do you wish you had an older, protective brother?

Very much so. I’ve always wanted an older brother.

If you could seek revenge on someone would you?

Yeah, but I would use my intelligence to do it.

Would you ever get a tattoo?

I have two. I’d love another one as well.

Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?

We’re married, so what’s the question?

Have you ever liked anyone that was in a relationship with someone else?

Kind of. But it wasn’t anything serious.

Do people ever compliment your eyes?

It’s the most frequent compliment I hear.

Who was the last person you hung out with?

My husband.

Have any of your exes ever given you roses?

No, but they knew I didn’t want it. Nielsje has given me tulips, though. It was very nice.

Do you think your last ex ever thinks about you?

I know he does.

Have you text voted for an American Idol?

Wrong continent, sorry.

Have you ever run out of gas?

Almost. We were passing Antwerp and we had to go into the city to look for a petrol station.

Would you rather have salad or french fries for a side dish?

Fries ate not French, and even though I like fries and I live in a country that is known for them, I’d rather like salad.

Ever been to California? Did you like it?

Never been to the US.

What’s your favorite thing about the town you live in?

Beautiful architecture.

Are you boobs real?

I’m afraid I don’t have any boobs.

What’s the best Valentine’s Day present you’ve ever received?

We don’t celebrate it.

Could you date someone who has been only your friend for a long time?

I’ve only dated guys who were my long time friends. I can’t do it the other way around, I don’t date strangers.

Which one of your relationships was the shortest?

My first ex, six months.

Which was the longest?

My husband, 5 years and counting.

Have any of your exes told you they regret breaking up with you?

Yeah, Nielsje. But we both know it was the only way.

Favorite boy’s name?

Joris.

Name one of your friends’ children:

Davanie and Xavi, if I remember well.

Do you know any twins?

Yeah, I have two coworkers who are twin sisters.

What’s your favorite country song?

I don’t listen to country.

What age did you lose your virginity?

I was 24. Late, but with the right guy.

How far away is the closest Walmart?

Like... the whole Atlantic Ocean apart?

Chick-fil-a, Taco Bell or McDonald’s?

I don’t know the first two, so it’s a logical choice.

Did you ever get an allowance as a child?

Yes, but very small.

Pizza rolls or bagel bites?

I don’t really know either of these.

What kind of pets does your grandmother have?

My grandparents are deceased.

What’s the last show you really got into that you have to wait for the next season of?

There was some Polish one, I’ve been waiting for season 2, but it got cancelled :(

Have you ever witnessed a car accident?

Yeah, many times on German motorways.

Sprinkles or frosting?

Muizenstrontjes all the way, but I don’t really use it.

Do you like mushrooms?

I do, but only certain kinds.

How old is your youngest sibling?

She’s 27, gonna be 28 soon.

Do you like painting?

I’m not good at it, so no.

Have you ever been swimming with dolphins?

No, I haven’t.

What kind of soda is your favorite?

Coca Cola.

Penguins or pandas?

Pandas, if ever.

What’s the name of your pets?

Victoria and Suzanne.

Regular or pink lemonade?

I don’t know either.

Does anyone in your family have a birthday in February?

Yes, my aunt who is the sister of my dad.

Are you into anime?

No, I’m not.

Pizza or nacho Lunchables?

What are Lunchables even? Never heard of them.

Have you ever been inside of a courtroom?

Yes, as a witness.

Which would you rather have, twins or triplets?

Neither.

Have you ever been in an ambulance?

Yes, after I suffered that brain bleeding.

Snakes or spiders?

Spiders.

Do you know how to braid hair?

Yeah, and a few months ago I discovered I can still do it, even with disabled hand. It was a little yay.

Do you believe in aliens?

We’re all aliens.

Did you ever catch crawfish or frogs?

Yes, frogs.

Ever drink from a garden hose?

Never, it’s ew.

What was the last computer game you played?

I don’t play computer games.

Can you count to 100 in another language?

Yeah, in about 10 of them.

Who gave you your first kiss?

My first ex.

Who was the last person you went on a date with?

My husband. Years ago.

Is good grammar attractive?

It is.

What are your full initials?

J. S. de J.

Would you ever let your grandma set you up on a blind date?

Neither of my grandmas would ever have such ideas.

Do you believe “Once a cheater, always a cheater”?

Yeah. It’s one of the things I wouldn’t forgive.

Why did you last cry?

30 years ago because I was a baby and it’s normal for babies. I hate this question.

Would you feel hurt if your last ex is in a relationship?

No, I would be actually happy for him.