#and my mom wants me to take it to do shit like go to the arcade
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I think Breaking Bad is an objectively better series in terms of writing, pacing and tight storyline, but having finished Better Call Saul and its more slow burner character studies I am obsessed with how nearly every single major character in the show is trying to convince themselves that they are rightously justified in some way. And by the time they realize they are not, it's too late.
Jimmy thinks he's justified in destroying Howard and Chuck's lives and rebrands himself as a 'champion of the underdog' when the truth is he's given several opportunities to better himself and just won't, because he gets a thrill out of fucking with people. Even when he flees to Nebraska he can't stop his schemes, like he's picking an open wound.
Kim convinces herself that screwing with Howard is funny and justified because he reprimanded her for pushing so hard with Jimmy's recommendation to Clifford Main. She should be angry at Jimmy for fucking up such a good opportunity but she, too gets a thrill out of punishing Howard and trying to drive him to insanity. She tries to wash her hands of it all, but Howard's murder makes her realize, too late that this was all just twisted, cruel, fuckery.
Mike lost his son to dirty cops, turns to a life of crime, but also seems to think he is above it all. Above the dirty cops, above the cartel. He tries to work via a moral code but it unravels when he kills Werner and then ends up betraying Nacho. It's only until Manuel tells him: "Justice? My boy is dead. This isn't justice, it's revenge. You gangsters are all the same" that he realizes he, too is a piece of shit and has repeated the cycle of losing a son.
Nacho says he "enjoys ripping off criminals because they can't go to the police. They have no recourse." And that's probably how he was able to do his job as Tuco's right hand man for so long. He just tells himself: these are all bad people so it's justified, when he's literally one of the bad people. He probably did all kinds of evil shit before he eventually wanted out.
Chuck thinks he's justified in keeping Jimmy's career prospects down because Jimmy's mom saw him as "the golden boy." He's furious that he had to work hard and (to his eye, anyway) Jimmy got to sail through life by taking shortcuts, so he won't allow him to climb the ladder. Chuck is somewhat right that Jimmy fucks everything up, deliberately, but part of his motivator is definitely bitterness and revenge and not concern. He even tells Jimmy: "You never really mattered to me."
Narratively: "I'm sorry that happened to you but you have no one to blame but yourself."
#better call saul#squirms happily#new problematic blorbos!#so many!#jimmy mcgill#kim wexler#mike erhmantraut#chuck mcgill#nacho varga#howard hamlin#breaking bad
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A Quiet Home
Jaune:*walks in* Hey, I’m back.
Weiss:*writing*….
Jaune:I umm, got some food. Saph said she always makes too much so-
Weiss:You should’ve turned it down. Your nephew is a growing boy.
Jaune:She wouldn’t have offered if she couldn’t help. How’s rent looking?
Weiss:Despite my colossal fuck up on the mission, it’s covered.
Jaune:Hey, what’s important is-
Weiss:Jaune, don’t patronize me. I screwed up, got my leg hurt, got the client hurt, and lost the target. *puts pen down* Thankfully I found another high paying one. It’s a three weeks long and I’m-
Jaune:Actually…I put in a request to take that mission too. Client said he’ll think it over.
Weiss:*turns around* Excuse me? You’re taking my job line ups? You went in the last two missions. It’s my turn to-
Jaune:You need a break.
Weiss:Tsk, not this shit again. I just had a break!
Jaune:Crunching bill numbers is not a break. Weiss, your head isn’t in the game, and that’s fine. After all, your mom…
Weiss: “My mom” nothing we aren’t talking about this. There’s nothing to talk about. She lived drunk and died drunk. Predictable ending.
Jaune:Weiss-
Weiss:Give me space! And cancel your request while you’re at it. You’re in no condition to go on another assignment so quickly.
Jaune:…I’m not letting you go on that mission.
Weiss:Sorry, you’re not letting me? *stands up* I don’t remember needing your approval.
Jaune:That’s not what I-
Weiss:No it was, or else you wouldn’t have applied for the same mission despite our agreement. I made one mistake and now it goes out the window?
Jaune:You’re angry.
Weiss:Of FUCKING course I’m angry! I’m trying to keep these lights on and not burden others while you’re bringing in leftovers and stopping my job!
Jaune:You’re not doing your job! You’re running away from your problems!
Weiss:Oh you’re one to talk! The only reason why you’re here is because moving back in with your folks would be too much to handle.
Jaune:I moved in with you because you needed a roommate! My girlfriend was cutoff and alone and I could help! All I’ve been doing is trying to help!
Weiss:I didn’t ask for your help! I was handling things just fine!
Jaune:You were struggling.
Weiss:AND I’M NOT NOW!? Does it make you feel a little better to say you tried. Can’t help but I want to fix things huh?
Jaune:That’s not fair.
Weiss:Oh now we want to be fair? After intentionally making my job harder? For someone who is “trying to help” it never really works out for you now does it!? Not for me not for P-
She immediately covered her mouth, scared and shocked from the venom that almost slipped past her lips; this carelessness was given back with a stare of contempt that ate at her.
Weiss:I-
Jaune:There was a never a second I thought you were broken, or needed to be fixed. Guess that was my fault. Looks like your father did a number on you after all.
Her blood went cold. Weiss’s cheeks began to burn red as her anger boiled over.
Weiss:And yours never cared to do a swing to begin with.
Jaune:Speaking from experience?
Weiss:Get. Out.
Jaune:….
Weiss:I SAID GET OUT! I DON’T NEED THIS FROM YOU! I DON’T NEED YOU!
Jaune:…Good, cause you don’t have me. Sell my stuff for all I care.
He reaches in his pocket and throws his key at her. Weiss catches on reflex before hearing a thunderous boom as Jaune slams the door on the way out that shakes the room and cause a picture to shatter. The room is deathly silent as Weiss stares at the door.
Weiss:F-FINE! RUN BACK TO YOUR FAMILY!
………..
Not knowing what to do, Weiss simply grabbed her broom to clean up the mess Jaune made. Glass was half hazardly swept aside as she picked up a broken frame holding a photo of her laughing with Jaune, their face covered with cake from their house party with a banner overhead.
“A year of memories and miracles”
Weiss’s hand began to tremble until the picture slipped from her fingers. A giant pit filled her stomach and threatened to gag her as her knees fell to floor and her hands covered a ghastly wail. Finally, her breath was robbed and tears broke through shaking eyes filled with dread over the reality that was flooding in. The miracles were gone, and the memories, now bittersweet.
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◁ || ▷
Dan: They only onboarded me today and I have orientation tomorrow. Hopefully I get to meet some of the animals.
Ares: Oh so that’s why you have those goofy shoes, I thought you were leading the girl scouts for a second.
Dan: You’re buggin! Frances said they were cute.
Ares: It’s not a bad look, it makes me feel like we’re going on an adventure.
Dan: I bought you a boba and this is how you treat me?!
Ares: [ snickers ] Where are we going, captain?
Dan: I hate everything.
Ares: Ok, ok! You’re right I shouldn’t treat sugar mamas like that.
Dan: Ares! Shut up!
Ares: [ whispers ] I think the whole store is looking at us.
Dan: And?? Let them look.
Ares: Wait, wait, make sure my hair looks good.
Dan: You’re so…
Ares: Well?
Dan: It looks fine.
Ares: I am proud of you by the way.
Dan: Really?
Ares: Yeah! It’s cool, graduation’s around the corner and you have this sick job to look forward to.
Dan: Oh! Neat.
Ares: Did I say something wrong?
Dan: Not at all, I guess I want to feel the same excitement as my friends do.
Ares: Ah, I see. Well, you know it’s alright to feel that way, right?
Dan: I know. Walk me to the train?
Ares: [ nods ]
-
Dan: My mom would project all of her dreams onto me. So success doesn’t ever seem real to me. Like there’s always some sort of ladder to climb.
Ares: You ever think you haven’t found the right one?
Dan: I do but then again I worry if anything truly is satisfying enough to try.
Ares: Then maybe that’s the issue.
Dan: What is?
Ares: We’re too busy measuring things by success rather than happiness.
Dan: Ahh, I see the vision.
Ares: Maybe take this step as the thing that’ll allow you to build a future you want. Like a platform.
Dan: I guess I’ve been under the impression that a career was the end goal not the foundation.
Ares: Felt that.
Dan: Yeah right.
Ares: Dan, I don’t know what I want to be. There’s music, photography, going back to school. I feel like I’ve spent more time trying to pick something than actually doing it. You have something to work off of.
Dan: So do you. Plenty of things.
Dan: Look, you should listen to your advice as well. There’s a lot of good stuff in there.
Ares: Hey, don’t move.
Dan: Noo. I hate having my picture taken.
Ares: Then act like I’m not here.
Dan: That literally changes nothing.
Ares: Oke I’m taking it now.
Dan: Ugh.
Ares: Shit. You might’ve blinked.
Dan: Seriously?!
Ares: [ laughs ] No. Not at all.
Dan: This dude.
Ares: You should catch your train now.
Dan: That would be smart.
Dan: Ares?
Ares: Yes?
Dan: You’re a pretty cool guy.
Ares: Ah. Nice, nice.
Dan: Awkward as fuck too.
Ares: PFFT I’m leaving now.
Dan: Bye.
#erhm 🤓☝️ i beg ur pardon but are u BITCHES PLAYING FOOTSIE?!#u would think being friends with atlas dan would have picked up a thing or two on flirting but NOPE#but also i think ares likes being bullied by dan but only dan#tessellate#tessellate: ares#tessellate: dan#ts4#show us your story#simblr
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oooooo I have so many ideas…
If you have a kid with curly, how does he react as a father? He gives me SUCH STRONG girl dad energy and I can’t tell you why. This man is a GIRL DAD. How is he as a parent? Does he cook? Can he help his kid with math homework? Is he a family man? I’m so curious to see your thoughts on this.
Prob like the 7th request I've gotten for dad/dilf Curly 😭😭 also to my very special anon who has been in my asks for a very special Jimmy request, give me a few days, it'll be out love 🪽(I'm busy asf rn)
Tw/cw; none!! All sfw this time :) see guys I can be family friendly when I want to be
Not proofread
I've actually gone over this in the tags of a different post, I do think Curly would be a girl dad. He'd want twin girls and you guys canNOT tell me different.
After you come home from the hospital, Curly would do literally everything for you and the new babies. He'd prepare healthy meals for you, he'd help clean and feed the babies, if one of them started crying in the middle of the night he'd insist on being the one to take care of it, etc.
Basically the bare minimum but is still praised because the bare minimum is hard to come by now.
I see Curly as the type of man to be raised by a single mom and having no father figure. Morbid? A bit, but it helped shape him into the super awesome sauce girl dad he is today.
Because of having an absent father, Curly would go above and beyond to make sure he's present in his children's lives. Any days he has off, he's spending time with you and your new baby girls. Oh, his daughter's are in a school play? He's calling off work and showing up with flowers and chocolates for both of them. Shit like that
Curly would come into work late or just take the day off completely if you needed extra help with the kids. He'd leave work early to pick them up from school if you couldn't. He WANTS to be there. And just remember guys, if he wanted to, he would.
Curly would also try to be home early so he could read them bedtime stories. Idk I just think that's cute.
Once they start growing up, he's getting more into their interests. Curly would be the type of dad to let his daughters put makeup on him and have them do his nails. He would happily walk into pony express as a well known captain and have nail polish everywhere on his hands BUT his nails.
And yes, he would help his kids with their homework. Something about Curly makes me think he took mathematics in college, and I can safely say he is breaking every generational curse by not making your children cry over their math homework.
BONUS CONTENT!!!; Curly would want older twin daughters (obviously, we just went over that) and a younger boy. He would want to name the boy Dallas, but I can't think of any names for the girls. He'd like the name Phoebe a lot, so probably that and maybe a name like Sophia for the other twin.
A/N; too many curly fics, must make master list
#i quite like the name dallas actually#mouthwashing curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing x reader#captain curly x reader#curly x reader#captain curly
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🤡 PSA: PLEASE READ 🤡
Before I go do some cleaning, I wanted to get this off my chest. No, this isn’t another impulsive vent post, in fact, it will be my last post regarding last night’s events.
I have felt incredibly guilty ever since I vented about a particular ship. It was never my intent, as I’ve said before, to shut down others’ work simply because I don’t like it. Yes, I do not like Jack x Jeff, but I don’t hate or have anything against people who do, and I feel some may have taken my feelings on the subject a bit personal. People here are just trying to have fun, right?
My relationship with Laughing Jack, who yes, I am aware is a fictional character, is complicated. I don’t necessarily view myself as a casual Jack selfshipper, but the ones who are casual shippers are some of the coolest people I have ever met, and I have never once thought of my love for Jack as superior to theirs.
I responded by trauma dumping to a user I have never talked with before who questioned the state of my health when it came to Jack, which after a moot pointed out, realized that wasn’t the appropriate response to someone who might have just been showing genuine concern, even if it came off a bit rude initially. I don’t do well without tone indicators sometimes, so please forgive me. My hostility comes from a near decade of unhealthily bottling my mental health issues, because my mom never got me the care I needed, only threats to a psych ward.
I want to change; I realize my trauma dumping isn’t doing me or anyone else any favors, but when you have no money, no ability to drive, no other outlets, in a world that often shuns people like you, my options are very limited. I’ve had no luck finding a therapist for every issue I may have; this has been my coping mechanism since I was 15. I’m autistic, and still don’t feel like I ever aged mentally past 15 because of it. I was never given the tools I needed to be an adult, so I regress often. It’s the only thing I can think to do when shit goes south.
But enough with the pity story, I really just wanted to say that I’m sorry. Yeah, may not mean much, but, I really am sorry for everything, whether it’s being jealous over something I can’t control, or just being an awful friend.
I really am trying to get better, it’s just taking longer than I’ve planned for it to, because of things constantly getting pushed back.
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Arcane is over (😭) and I have some criticisms so here are my lists of who Won and who Lost in no particular order
LOST SEASON 2
1. Isha
Literally wasn't even mentioned after she died, like wtf was that
We couldn't have a memorial or anything? Come on
Her sacrifice was ultimately meaningless because Warwick got brought back anyway
2. Sevika
Didn't get a single line through all of Act 3
Where is my wife
At least she didn't die?
3. The entire Undercity, to be honest
Where did the independence thread go
Giving Sevika a council seat wasn't enough
I don't like that so many of them had to fight in Enforcer uniforms, that felt wrong
That was the MAIN CONFLICT for most of the show. It felt so weird to gloss over it at the end
4. Vander/Warwick
Gonna be real I wasn't super crazy about most of his presence here, I don't feel like it actually contributed much to anyone's development, except MAYBE Viktor's
We would not have lost anything if they didn't have the flashback scene with their mom
Super didn't like Jinx's ending as it pertained to him
5. Jinx
Hey I super don't like that every character who had a moment of suicide ideation or attempt ended up dead or "dead"
I don't like the way she "died" it didn't feel earned
I don't feel like the ending she got aligned well with her character at all. She spiraled and then just. stayed at the bottom of the spiral :(
They put a TON of family stuff in act 1 and 2 that didn't get resolution in 3
I think they kinda did my girl dirty I'm sorry
6. Loris
Clearly would have had more of a role if they didn't have to cut him for time
NEITHER WON NOR LOST SEASON 2
1. Vi
I want to say she won because she got to bang her cop girlfriend in a prison cell and the sex scene was good as hell but
She also was just taking massive L's the whole time
Like it never felt like she ever had any real wins other than that and that bummed me out
Didn't get enough time to be a dumbfuck with Jayce :(
Caitlyn
Didn't get enough proper resolution for her wonderful fascist arc
She felt a little dropped in Act 3 as well
Glad she got that Vussy tho, good for her
And I did like the vs Ambessa fight, that was also good
I honestly feel like Viktor and Jayce's romance was written better than her and Vi's, and as a gay woman who is constantly watching mlm relationships get so much more attention, it rubs me the wrong way
WON SEASON 2
1. Viktor (OBVIOUSLY)
The fucked up robot army. The religious imagery. The body horror. His robot alien design is scary as fuck. Absolutely incredible work
Got to be taller and stronger than Jayce hooray
They're canon. That was the gayest shit I've ever seen in my life
I do wish they had spent more time overall fleshing out more of the disability commentary, I feel like it was a little lacking in the end
Nevertheless BEAUTIFUL and HORRIFYING and TRAGIC
2. Jayce
See above
Yeah he also got to be a big hero and got to be resolved really well
Did NOT see his death coming that was crazy
They Magnus 200'd his ass, damn
He chose Viktor over everything I'm emo
They made a heart when they touched their foreheads together fuck OFF
3. Heimerdinger
Literally just living his best life
Love that he didn't tell Ekko he can't die, he just let the poor boy think he got fuckin atomized, king shit, that's hilarious
I would have stayed in that universe too tbh
4. Ambessa
The single tear over Kino. Her love for her children at direct odds with her need for control. Her arc was explored so well
Died a warrior's death at the hands of her brilliant daughter, I know that's how she would have wanted to go
Also was very hot in every scene. Good for her (and good for me)
She just got a lot of love from the writers and I'm very happy to see that effort put into an older Black woman character
5. Mel
Speaking of gorgeous Black women
I was so worried she was going to get dropped but her ending was SO good
Her glow up with the gold is fantastic, she looks amazing in the white hood
Love that they gave her abilities that would inherently change her priorities AND gave her the throne of Noxus, I have high hopes that she'll be prominent in another show in the future
They made her such a powerful badass but still let her be merciful and forgiving. Absolutely amazing. She is the wolf
6. Ekko (?)
On the fence about him
LOVED the au scene. Perfect
And I loved that our boy savior got to be the one that set off the bomb that stopped Viktor
But he was kind of dropped otherwise? Like what happened with his tree?
Generally wish he had more development and screentime in this season
But I'm happy he was so pivotal to the climax
AND I'm happy he got to kiss Powder. He and Jinx would never have worked out
7. Maddie
Haha I never liked you. Get fucked you horrible little bootlicker. Typical cop
8. Singed
How come YOU get everything you want?
Fuck you.
Basically all my criticisms boil down to it feeling rushed overall. It's clear that they intended to have more time, and that breaks my heart. We all know Netflix's reputation for cancelling stuff out of the blue, and I've heard that maybe certain parties were unhappy with the depictions of gay romance and realistic social revolution. Whatever the reasons, I wish they had a third season, because I think they could have solved every problem I have with it. Regardless, it's an incredible work of art and very likely one of if not THE best animated series ever made.
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Alright this is clearly about us, the most anti psych pro endo on this site. Let's go through this dumbfuck's post who decided to post in the endo safe tag to "warn endogenics" while also insulting them in the first paragraph.
"Being anti-psych and talking about that online is not okay" because insane people need to shut the fuck up about the psych abuse they survived! they're clearly in the wrong, after all I was totally fine after being in the psych ward. Wait what do you mean psych torture?
alright so the heart of anti psychiatry is to uplift psych abuse survivors and to demedicalize divergencies of the human mind that are deemed as "abnormal and disordered" when it tends to be a natural reaction to societal oppression and stress. What defines normal? Such a weird line, and guess what, it's white determined! After all, white patients get diagnosed with adhd while black patients get diagnosed with oppositional defiance disorder. because fighting back against authority is wrong!!! they must be insane, send them to the fucking priso- i mean- psych ward where they will be isolated from society because we don't want to see those crazy people on our streets!
god
get your head out of your ass
"let me use a personal anecdote" let me use mine! my mother is a cop, she's been through therapy herself. the prison she worked at was also a partial psych ward. A few of her jobs was to forcefully strip psychotic people down and force them into a white room where they are constantly kept watch by police officers to make sure they don't hurt themselves. female cops would rape patients with their finger to make sure they didn't have kill yourself drugs and knives inside their vagina.
you think they came out healed and fixed? like you?
my mom would beat me btw for shit like not standing for the flag, and she tend to love the idea of psych wards and reformation
oh not a good enough anecdote because it was a half prison? my psych ward did the same thing, and it had fun shock "therapy" too and drugs that damage your brain.
and all this shit wasn't just nurses being evil, it's fucking psychiatric protocol.
if you are any way out of the norm, you're broken and must be cured!!! the cure is this. the cure is this.
"i came out healed" aw congrats, good thing you didn't try and say no to taking your meds! they might have had to try and tranquilize you and force it down your throat just like at every single fucking psych ward
"oh we have to break the cycle of violence!" hey and I wonder where this cycle comes from, surely not environmental factors, must be something sick with these people right.
"be like me and break the cycle of violence" the violence you throw to endogenic systems? what a joke
also the funniest part is you clearly don't know shit about anti psychiatry because well
our hate focuses on psychiatrist..not therapist. therapist do tend to be cops waiting to snitch you out and ward you tho </3
To all the young people seeing this
if you were involuntarily warded, i'm sorry you went through that. it wasn't right, don't let them gaslight you into thinking your isolation was a must. you survived
i see anti-psych getting thrown around a lot in endogenic spaces.
I get it. You don't actually have the disorder you wish you had and professionals tell you this. So, you're anti-psych. But.
Being Anti-Psych and perpetuating that online is Not Okay.
You see there's this thing called generational trauma, and that at its core usually is a scenario where someone has trauma and mental health issues and instead of going to therapy, they have children. And then the cycle just continues and continues.
The only way to break this cycle is therapy, and because generational trauma THRIVES on anti-psych mentalities, many of the people who want to break the cycle struggle.
To give a personal anecdote, my mother hates therapy - she has never been to therapy and she will never. she also questions anyone who seeks out therapy (including myself) and tries to convince them they are better off without it. my mother also has extensive trauma and mental health issues and as a result my mother has been one of my main abusers throughout my life.
Therapy is NOT always easy or straightforward I GET IT
there is really good therapists, but there still is therapists that aren't good. by the time i realized that i needed a proper therapist i had gone through extensive trauma and my therapist was severely under qualified to deal with me and ended up crying in front of me after a particular rough session.
i was put off from therapy for a really long while after that and probably would have called myself "anti-psych"
but then my mental health issues got so bad i ended up in a psych ward and i was forced to have a therapist. and through her, i have healed SO incredibly much. i can see now how incredibly important therapy is to individuals with trauma but also to the loved ones of those with trauma. i can see how therapy really does stop the cycle of generational trauma and abuse.
Encouraging others online to be anti-psych especially in a space with vulnerable young people with trauma is inexcusable.
it is so fucking harmful and i hate you all who do it i hate you SO FUCKING MUCH
#tw psychiatry#tw rape#tw suicide#tw psych ward#tw psych abuse#tw syscourse#syscourse#tw anti endo#anti psych#anti psychiatry
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hong kong miku,,,
#hopping on the trend jumpscare i’m from hong kong surprise#i haven’t seen that many hk mikus around#lowkey chat i think i kinda ate with this one#however i will say i am coloring in the dark so if any colors look off that’s why#and also i haven’t opened this program in literal months i jumped straight into this no warmup no nothing#miku is what pulls me out of art block apparently i was locked in for 5 hours STRAIGHT#someone needs to teach me how to paint properly holy#not sure how i feel about the bottom left one but that was a quick one anyways#i am from hk originally but i haven’t been back in years so i have no idea about the culture other than food and mirror#OKAY let me explain the context#street food is a big thing in hk and quick and easy things like fish balls egg waffles and like siu mai and wonton noodles are popular#back then people really would just squat down on the side of the road or right in front of the shop to eat it and go#but i don’t think anyone does that anymore city life and all that#ohh i should have done instant noodles breakfasts god i loved those#if anyones from hk if you go to the causeway bay mtr station exit that leads up to the big road near sogo. do they still sell siu mai there#that shit was BANGER i remember asking for them all the time#a good majority of parents in hk would get their daughters ears pierced as a baby something about them not feeling as much pain idk#that’s just what i was told#i used the neon for her friendly standard greeting cause i wanted to incorporate the neon signs somehow without actually drawing a whole bg#lots of neon signs in hk. i heard they had to take them down cause of light pollution which is sad but understandable#everyone got their shoes from dr kong. at least when i was younger they did#boy band is self explanatory. i heard they’re really popular my mom listens to them#oh i had her messing with her shoes cause hk people move FAST. you stop for one second and you get shoved#so like a fun little allusion#gave her black roots just for fun. she is violating every school uniform code possible#this is all based off of my memory by the way so like. anyone who knows this better than i do hit me up#hatsune miku#miku from my culture#jellos scribbles#i haven’t tag yapped in so long welcome back my love i missed you
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why cant my dad just do things for himself once and awhile im so tired of this
#he has physical issues and mental but bro he doesnt even try to help himself#hes in pain constantly and wont do jack shit about it#and he KNOWS if he starts doing a little more than sit and watch tv all day he'll feel atleast slightly better#the healing process is painful both physically and mentally but he hasnt even started it#he makes me so mad oh my god#i grew up with my mom telling me “he acts that way because hes in pain” DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT#he literally tries nothing. hes gonna die in the next 10 years#hes unhealthy and overweight and barely eats and his teeth are all messed up and he cant eat anything without it hurting like hell#but nooo he wont go to the dentist noooo#we HAVE insurance its not like a money thing jesus christ#ive barely had a father because of this he's constantly in pain and so he doesnt want to talk to anyone hes threatened to hit mymom and#later blamed it on his back pain#oh my god i cannot live with him anymore im so tired of it#he doesnt even.work my mom has to work until night to feed us and keep this house running and then my dad buys random shit off the Internet#and then fucking turns around and YELLS at my mom after she gets home from a looong day of work asking Why she spends so much money#its HER money. idgaf if you share a bank account or whatever its HERS she earned all of that and spends it on shit YOU NEED.#he has brought NOTHING to this family for the last 10 years besides being a father andhe DOESNT EVEN DO THAT#ohhh and his medicine he takes for all this pain “helps him” no the fuck it doesnt hes still in somuch pain. and then it makes him tired#and he sleeps all day ohmygod#hes just there at this point. i come home and dont even look at him cuz i Know hes sitting in that stupid chair in the living room#ive tried so hard to understand that “oh he's just..acting like that cuz hes in pain and .cant help it” I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE#it feels like i barely have a father#and the audacity he has to boss me around. like i understand im your child but oh my god let me live. i dont wanna end up like you#okay hes in pain yeah? DO SOMETHING ABOUT. IT that is NO excuse to be a shitty dad. NO excuse#oh yeah i have a dad but hes emotionally distant and never sees me becausehe wont get off his lazy ass#but yet i cant stop loving him. hes so much like me sometimes and that scares me#im going mad okay
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I am a descendant of Ranthia Drahl, Queen of Embers. She is with me now and I am not afraid. My friends are behind me, and I will protect them. My friends are with me and I am not afraid. My friends are with me and I am not afraid.
My friends are with me and I am not afraid.
#SPOILER ALERT IN TAGS#House of Earth and Blood#Crescent City#Sarah J. Maas#Throne of Glass#The Assassin’s Blade#Lehabah#Bryce Quinlan#Aelin Galathynius#Sam Cortland#book quote paralells#CC HOEAB#first read along with me reacts no spoilers please currently reading and losing it#BRYCE IS THE HORN#I KNEW DANIKA DIDNT DO IT but this is so bad still he made her and she tried so hard#one by one the angels rose to their feet hand to their heart the only salute they could go#embers like our Queen like Bryce’s mom like fire… wanting to walk worlds again another note that feels like something… and my bb Syrinx… and#it’s giving Doby and destroying me#she was free#noooooo Lehaba was dead#HOLY SHIT SHE HAS THE CURE#the god slayer rifle I knew that had a reason#REMEMBER THAT YOU WILL DIE#fire and ice#break my heart and soul#first it was Hunt then Danika then the capture then her turning in then sis reveal then Fury Danika Bryce Syrinx Sandriel Lehabah AGAIN#I’m worried she’ll nearly die and have to take the plunge#to kill an arc angel the two extra seconds lol but then the governer cause modern fantasy#I should’ve known Maas too much so much#I was right about the witch queen and sword and agh so many things
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you guys i love college so much
#i hate assignments.#BUT LIKE HOLY SHIT I THANK GOD EVERY DAY THAT IM NOT IN HIGH SCHOOL#im an adult who is alive and has a life and does things as an adult and gets treated as an adult and i get to pick my own classes and#i can buy myself things if i want to.... and im active in my club and we're going to travel to another school to compete#I GET TO TRAVEL TO ANOTHER SCHOOL TO COMPETE AND HAVE A TEAM BONDING THING AND DO LONG ROAD TRIPS ABOUT IT#AND MY SPORT OF CHOICE IS LITERALLY LYING#IM IN MOCK TRIAL CLUB AS A WITNESS. I SIT AROUND COMFORTABLY AND WATCH THE LAWYERS DO THEIR THING AND THEN I SOUND SYMPATHETIC ON STAND#ITS SO#it's really fun.#and also i get along with my siblings so much better now that i dont live with them#im not getting mad at my sister all the time just because she Makes Sounds. im not getting annoyed with my brother for being argumentative#we just. hang out.#(frequently lmao)#and my mom and i keep going out to eat#and i visit my dad for lunch most weeks#and we all HANG OUT#and . fuck. i love life#and being an adult who gets to live it#and COLLEGE#next semester im going to take a couese on Detective Fiction#and probably get a job or internship to fuel my spending addiction 🤑💰#💸!!!#* AND MY SLEEP SCHEDULE. WOW. FUCK. ITS ALL UP TO ME#AND I DONT HAVE TO GET UP EARLY EVERY MORNING#AAAAAA#my grades aren't fantastic. right. i know they're not. but im not failing any classes. and i get along w my professors.#i like econ a lot more than i expected to
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being new to the final fantasy 7 fandom and hearing about ship wars and not thinking much of it and then you see an account with 500 posts about how tifa is horrible and deserves to die and another one harassing aerith's voice actor because she talks about her own character more than she talks about tifa and you go, ohhhh. I see, now. These people are unhinged
#im not saying everyone is like this but i just wanted to see fanart and it was like#normal post. normal post. 10 page long essay on how 'aerith is a toxic selfish little peasant and if you dont agree with me go kill urself'#truly. some real insane shit#mom take me home im scared#cloti#clerith#ff7r#anyway. in my noob opinion. cloud zack aerith tifa polycule. do u see the vision
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btw todd’s reluctance to join the dps because he doesn’t want to read (which is then accommodated for) and is scared to put himself out there (which is also worked through) being read as todd not wanting to go AT ALL, and thus neil making the proper accommodations (“todd anderson, who prefers not to read, will keep the minutes of the meetings”) and encouraging him to step out of the box that stifles him being seen as ‘forceful’ or like he can’t take no for an answer makes me insane with rage
#and him trying to stop neil from asking if todd not reading at the meetings is okay isn’t him wanting not to go#its him not wanting neil to ask because (as someone with social anxiety) it’s EMBARRASSING ASF for someone to ask for things on your behalf#literally just think about it as the meme of ‘when i tell my friend im hungry and he tells his mom that *i* want food instead of both of us’#and the whole ‘neil not knowing how to take no for an answer’ thing…… dont get me fucking started#the kid who’s had to take no for an answer his whole life? the kid whose first proper scene IS him taking no for an answer? are you serious?#being encouraging and accommodating and (admittedly) a little pushy when he’s got his mind set on something—#—is NAWT the same as not being able to take no for an answer or bulldozing through conversations with people#he and todd DO listen to each other in those conversations theyre just on opposing sides—#—because their understandings of the world don’t fully align at that point in time/the movie#which is totally fucking normal?????? because later on they DO properly align?????????#i feel so crazy about this every time i see someone say todd didn’t want to go the dead poets meetings because it’s so obvious he DID#he was just scared#and you know what maybe it IS a little forceful#but given how dedicated todd is to shutting off and hating and isolating himself he NEEDS a little forceful to be broken through to#if no one ever pushed me to do things when i was scared (as irritated as it can make me) i’d never do SHIT dude#and obviously todd is the same way because he ALL BUT OUTRIGHT SAYS AS MUCH#‘i appreciate this concern but i’m not like you’ IS about neil’s voice and opinions mattering to people but it’s ALSO about—#—him being outgoing and trying new things and putting himself out there#WHICH TODD WANTS TO BE ABLE TO DO!!!!!!!!#the moral you take away from todds growth is NOT that he has to change to be accepted because he DOESNT#its that he has to gain the confidence and belief in himself to grow and become the version of himself he WANTS to be#he NEVER changes on a fundamental level to make others happy (although his growth does make others happy) he just opens up more#and i dont know WHY some people think his arc is becoming a completely different person#like yall PLEASE#this isnt even an anderperry thing this is an issue even if you read them completely platonic#i blame the FUCKASS novelization…. dps book you will always be hated by ME#dps#dead poets society#neil perry#todd anderson
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Sims 2 CC Mega Post
I say 'mega' but there really isn't a whole lot, I just didn't wanna split it up. Anyway, yeah, I mostly and normally and prefer to make Sims 4 stuff, but I made some Sims 2 stuff for me last year and this and I figured, may as well share it. Most of these require outside meshes so keep that in mind, Sims 2 CC downloading is a bloody nightmare.
Alex Skin
So I made a custom skin with tattoos for Alex as it seemed simple enough to do. Ain't gonna look perfect, but it looks fine from a distance, same resources I used for my Sims 4 versions, so I did vector the rose and skull. I based the skin off these default replacements. You don't NEED these, but they make it so that everyone matches. Yes that site requires an account and login, it's NSFW, it has body hair and works with nudity. Because obviously I play with mods like that. I made the skin look right for Fit/Thin/Fat but I didn't bother with any age but adult nor did I bother with female, because, idc. I THINK this is Alex's hair mesh, but idfk, I have so many that look like this.
It also works in Castaway Stories, as does all of these, because I used them in it too. :> That made Alex the palest guy on the island as all the skin tones in Castaway Stories were shifted to one tone darker per. I manually put my replacement skin in that too, but I didn't have the darkest, so no body hair to them.
Streaked Jack Hair
You need this mesh to make this work. I made this for myself as I didn't really like anything else I had for him, and this is Sims 2, so I went with earlier hair, and I liked how this mesh looked. Loosely based on like this hair. I didn't bother with other ages beyond adult again. I would have if I decided to de-age him and send him to university, but I did that with Otto instead.
Again also works in Castaway Stories, as I used it, again. It's easy to import Sim's faces from 2 into the stories games.
Awsten Tricolor Hair
Awsten Red Hair
You need this mesh to make this work. The bright green in that is also great and I used that for him at first. These are his eyes too, or rather his right eye. No screenshots of the red hair, but it's just a bright plain red in case you prefer it. I made this hair as it looked okay with the colors kind of being randomly spread around the mesh. This is his outfit btw. Again only works with adult as far as I'm aware.
BONER Shirt
R&R Shirt
NoRegRetsShirt
JALEXShirt
BMTHShirt1
BMTHShirt2
BMTHShirt3
BMTHShirt4
You need this mesh to make these work. All of these are Everyday fashion only by account of only the Everyday category having the option for separates and these are all tops. Don't ask me what pants I use, I have so many downloaded, but these work with all of them.
As it turns out I didn't take screenshots of all of these ingame, but maybe these help with that.
PTV Hoodie
DropDead Hoodie
You need this mesh for the PTV hoodie. I don't THINK the DD hoodie needs anything external, I compared it to a vanilla mesh and it seemed to line up. I don't know, I made it last December and I didn't log everything I did. Like the shirts above, Everyday category only as they are tops.
As a bonus, here's some misc Sims 2 screenshots to hit the image limit, including this stuff and with no context to my game. I know most people on modern computers play with The Ultimate Collection, but I installed it via discs, and a few ISOs as I didn't feel like spending $30+ for a few missing stuff packs on eBay. :) Pretty sure those ISOs are why my game is British and I have to always manually set the clock and a few other small things every time I load it. Not a big deal to me, just felt I'd mention for clarity. Castaway Stories is from an ISO too as have you SEEN those prices on eBay?! I have Sims 3 on Disc too, 100%, never made any CC for it tho. I love how Sims 2 was out at the peak of, ahem, mid to late 2000s culture so a lot of CC for it is of it's time in the best possible way. I kept this theme going with adding in custom music that ONLY existed from before 2009 (so 2008 is my cut-off date) and it's fun only hearing music of the era ingame. :) I DID make stuff for Sims 1 too years ago but I don't know how I even really did it so idk how to make more and also I don't care that much. I wanted to try playing with Alex and Jack in Sims 1 too but I kept getting fucked up files that didn't work or look right and I didn't know what I needed to do to make it right and I didn't wanna waste more time than I already did trying to make their faces. I do have semi-not ugly faces and outfits for a couple others tho.
Oh yeah, all this stuff is made in the Body Shop and GIMP for textures.
Whole SimFileShare Folder
#sims 2#sims 2 cc#ts2#ts2cc#sims 2 download#sims 2 cas#alex gaskarth#awsten knight#jack barakat#bring me the horizon#pierce the veil#Sims 2 is chaos and drama and no one attracts chaos and drama in my game like Alex and Jack do#Their house is a haven for enemies to come by and steal their newspaper knock over their trash can and pick fights#So the yard is often a biohazard of trash and inside isn't much better as both of them are slobs and Jack is lazy#Also they're engaged to each other despite both their aspirations hating commitment go figure#Jack did it I didn't they just somehow decided to accept despite getting negative memories for it lmao#Alex is a crybaby who's hard to satisfy and Jack just wants to make out and woohoo he's a lot easier#But they both have a lot of enemies who they fight a lot especially Jack as it feels like no one like pranks in this game#And I use him to attack Sims who are mean to Alex a lot too as Alex gets a lot of shit from townies for some reason#Awsten likes them as he likes to eat trash and also he's a werewolf and he just doesn't seem to care about much of anything#I had a case where Rian kept coming over and inviting himself in to make out and woohoo with Alex while beating up Jack#Now I got Jack and Rian to kinda get along but Rian is grumpy and it doesn't take much from Jack to set him off#Otto also hates Alex and likes Jack but again drama drama drama#I totally get why Sims 2 was really popular with middle aged moms in its heyday its like a soap opera#Geoff exists too as a werewolf as he wanted to be one and I just used him to turn Awsten as well#I brought Awsten and Geoff on vacation with Alex and Jack as I wanted to meet Bigfoot and have Jack flirt with him#But I needed mods to do that grrr#Also Alex got pregnant on that vacation but we don't have to talk about that it made him very difficult to work with#But he kind of already is a little bitch all the time anyway#sims castaway stories
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ohhhh my fucking god nobody needs to like know any of this medical tmi but it is literally 11 pm and if im kept up one minute longer when i just laid down trying to go to sleep by my mother YELLING REPEATEDLY that she needs to pee. im going to actually go insane. she got a catheter in. Yesterday. it is working. she won't listen to anyone when they tell her that this is the case. help me jesus. im sure if a nurse comes to check on her tomorrow they'll probably get the same response. my brain will simply explode
#crow.txt#the absolute levels of stress im under could create diamonds out of free floating carbon atoms my fucking god#can i have. Literally just one day of peace. just one!! fuck!!!!#at least now i have SOME validation from everyone else of shit that mom has honestly kinda always done#be absolutely furious and bitchy usually for no good goddamn reason and then immediately turn it off to look good in front of someone else#i had a feeling mom coming home was gonna be utterly miserable sooner rather than later#i literally cannot leave my room without her yelling for dad bc she thinks im him i guess. she has gotten him up like 4 times now#what the fuck do you want any of us to doooooooooooo. according to dad shes also just been really fucking hateful today#including to her SISTER who has been facilitating literally everything medically for her for the last month plus#like on one hand i know its hard and frustrating etc etc absolutely. on the other. what the fuck are you yelling at any of us for!#whatd we do! not a damn thing for the most part! holy shit im exhausted#and then im sure she will have the audacity to wonder why i dont really want to interact with her much rn#its very apparent she doesnt really understand whats going on or how much of anything works at this point including hospice care#but i truly cannot help you when your knee jerk response is to yell and be abusive. like. dads not been great either#bc hes also one to bitch and moan and yell abt shit. but like. so is mom. more than usual#and ill actually be damned if i let her treat me like that honestly ever again. like idk for once i can just#walk away from this behavior with zero consequences. i dont have to take it anymore. im not free but at least im fuckin closer than i was#guess my aunt wasnt kidding when she said her being coherent and rational last week might be the calm before the storm
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i can just feel that my computer is about to kick it. firefox makes my cpu usage jump from 10% to 70% just by loading a single page.
#its either that or programs these days are becoming too powerful for my nearly 15 y/o pc.#it's annoying!!!!! it makes me want to cry because what if my computer just. Stops. i cannot afford to fix it.#a decent pc (for what i need) is going to run me 1.5k Minimum.#even if i get a job Tomorrow it's going to take me a fucking year to be able to afford that shit between groceries and rent.#AND i have to pay my mom back for the fucking $13k in dental shit. (not her fault (obviously))#THIRTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. to fix my teeth so i can get my fucking hearing back and so i'm not in constant fucking pain.#i hate this fucking country. i want to go back in time and kill ronald reagan 30 times over.#i want to bring him back to life just to torture the shit out of him. beat him within an inch of his life. fix him up. and do it again.#wash rinse and repeat until *i* die.#i want to go back in time so i can beat ronald reagan's head into a foamy red pulp.#i want to treat ronald reagan like those beat-up dolls. fling him around a small room. throw grenades at him. hit him with a fucking nuke.#anyways i'm going to stop blabbing about all the ways i would kill ronald reagan and i'm going to seethe over my computer becoming a brick.
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