#and my mom hated waste
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what is the one food or ingredient you avoid simply because it was in every meal you had as a kid and you're sick of it? mine is zucchini
#it doesn't have to taste bad or be bad#you're just TIRED of it#food#random question#not writing related#per se#og#our garden always put out buku zucchini#and my mom hated waste#but every year she would plant it#so every year it was in every single family meal#she would even dehydrate it so we could eat it during the winter#i might be made of zucchini now
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mermay
#artists on tumblr#may has gone so incredibly fast#it literally just started and now it's almost over#i'll be going to finland to visit my mom and friend again in june#just in time for pride week#it's been really nice in helsinki the past few years#i hope it goes safely and peacefully this year too#last year there were some protestors screaming mean things with their hateful signs#but that's to be expected#it's hard to feel insulted when they're the ones wasting their time screaming at strangers#instead of doing something positive#must be a sad life being so angry all the time
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thinking of a young adult, freshly moved into his first home, which happens to have an elderly borrower couple living in the walls. the elderly couple is a little noisy and long lost all subtly when borrowing, so the guy discovers them quickly, but doesn’t let them know he’s aware of them. he lets them borrow in peace, and thinks they’re utterly adorable.
until he suddenly has to make sure no spoiled food is in range because they will steal and eat ANYTHING, no matter the expiration date. he has to put railings on the counter because they’re a little unsteady and his heart drops every time one almost has a fall. he has to act oblivious when he hears them bickering at a huge volume because they don’t realize how loud they are. he’s sneakily stealing their old worn supplies like rope or bags and replacing them with new ones that won’t break or hurt them.
and when the tinies do find out he knows about them? oh, little Grandma and Grandpa TAKE ADVANTAGE. they now have a strong young man who will go to the grocery store and get them applesauce whenever they ask. Grandpa is having the guy do heavy lifting and construction work for them. Grandma is sitting on his shoulder and fussing at him for slicing veggies wrong. they nag him to take them to visit their grandkids, they tell him to cut his hair and get a better job, they sneak little trinkets into his hand and run off before he can politely decline.
and he utterly loves it. he loves his tiny grandparents
#g/t#giant tiny#living with old people is beautiful and also challenging sometimes#my grandma was like ‘oh the cream is still good to use!’#girl i dumped that cream out. it had chunks in it. i replaced it with a new container that looks identical#bc she woulda fussed if she knew i threw it out. despite. the chunks.#my grandparents are fully There they just hate food waste. so me and my mom have to smuggle out spoiled food sometimes#its for ur own good gma 😔
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The fires keeps spreading….please stop spreading 😭😭 winds please stop already 🙏🙏
Being surrounded by fires 😭😔 its getting me stressed and very concerned.
I’m going to stress reblog, if I’m more quiet today…that’s why.
Praying the winds die down and the fires get contained 🙏🙏🙏
#Hana rambles#currently updating my go bag#but the winds and the air conditions are really bad especially for my family#I’m extra worried because mom is 02 dependent and we have 02 tanks in the house#fire and 02??? do not mix 😭😭😭#there’s a fire that’s especially close by that has me edge#and I can feel my asthma already flaring fuck#we have a air purifier so that will help#but really hoping it doesn’t spread enough to evac#winds are supposed to die down tonight#god please please stop the winds 🙏🙏🙏#this is what I hate about my state#why haven’t they prepared for things like this??#why waste money on shit we don’t need or care for#we already lost power and all communications yesterday#won’t be surprised if that happens today too 😭😭😭
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Any other autistic ppl out there who are just straight up agoraphobic at this point bc every time there’s a reason for you to leave the house it immediately fills you with an overwhelming sense of dread and terror and you catastrophize and shut down and then you have a meltdown if anyone tries to push you to do it or is that just me
#my anxiety is literally killing me#it has gotten so much worse I feel like I’m just wasting my life#and I’m so stressed out bc I have plans for my birthday that I really wanna do but I’m struggling so hard#I was supposed to go buy an outfit for my birthday today but I woke up and my mom called me and told me to get ready#and I just broke down completely because it was too much too fast and I hate myself so much for it😭😭😭😭#this is so embarrassing to post but yeah that’s where I’m at rn#the last time I went anywhere was November#i feel so fucking pathetic#and my mom makes it so much worse bc she doesn’t know how to handle it when I’m like this#so she just gets frustrated and says the worst possible things to me#and then I just wanna die
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f2f53dc8cdd55c247d4ee920196ca061/caaca95ea272e46b-5e/s540x810/b801b0c71005268e4f88e6296a74a5c09114e93f.jpg)
ive talked abt it before but ive always wondered if there was some deeper dynamic between caesar and vegapunk. like, vegapunk very clearly moved on from the warcrimes he was doing in mads (well. he did them for the world govt and Then grew a conscious about it and focused on humanitarian efforts) but he also had caesar tag along with him to work for the marines and it was ultimately caesar making even deadlier weapons for the marines that made him dismiss caesar. knowing what we do now though with vegapunk being in league with the revolutionaries im pretty sure vegapunk was intentionally sabotaging the world govts might (as well as just not wanting another superweapon in the world since he def knows about the 3 ancient weapons by that point) but compared to how the marines looked like they were about to arrest caesar due to the potential danger, vegapunks response to just dismiss him seems pretty soft handed in comparison.
did some part of vegapunk believe caesar could be better? like setting aside his own past where he managed to become a better person ,caesar's one sided rivalry with him is completely out of pride in only being seen as second best, yet when presented with his death caesar is fully in denial about it and looks like hes about to cry, contrast to judge who isn't even relevant enough to get a reaction but ultimately looks like he doesn't even care.
mads was shown to be completely dysfunctional as a group before dissolving, but after said dissolution, vegapunk and caesar worked together for about 18-20 years between mads' dissolution and him being dismissed, 2 decades of just the two of them.
I feel like theres some hidden element to their dynamic that we just arent privy to yet, where they did care about each other more than it may initially seem to on the surface, which may be revealed with a proper caesar backstory + coming events in elbaf (which im 100% betting hes gonna be there for given how pivotal he was in giant research and the SMILE fruits)
#i lie awake at night thinking about how we NEVER got an actual caesar backstory. the flashback was for how punk hazard was made#we got a judge backstory and a queen (sorta mads) backstory and a vegapunk backstory but never one for caesar#still holding onto my bet that caesar breaks off from neo mads and tracks down the straw hats to get some answers abt vegapunk#and hey its gonna be elbaf arc also since he was trying to make giants + big mom is 100% coming back#caesar is gonna be the follow through on hogbacks set up narrative with chopper im 100% betting#hogback -> respected by chopper but then hated by him for wasting his intellect#caesar -> initial enemies whom chopper forced to use his talents for good and redeem him in some capacity#one piece#zerav meta#caesar clown#vegapunk
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erm…..posting about an OC via a rushed shitpost was not on my 2025 bingo card!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂get it??? 😂😂😂because his name is bingo??(GETS SHOT)
these are all things he has done or has attempted to do so consider this the full intro post for that freak for now. he’s still too undercooked to fully introduce but damn I love him
#pdbc#I love him. he’s the sole descendant of a royal family and. if you’ll pardon the pun. is royally fucking things up for himself#he could do so much in life and instead decides to be the next Gordon Ramsay……..such wasted potential#did. did I ever mention that part of him. his clan is called the Ramsay clan after all#he wants to be Gordon Ramsay sooooo fucking bad…….#big theater kid gone wrong energy from him#so many of my posts this year have been pdbc related. it Will happen again.#< (in my defense I’m working on other non-pdbc stuff !! but pdbc stuff is easy to make because I don’t have to think about it)#once I’m not so burnt out I’m really excited to design bingo….not even going to attempt to rn#I hate designing outfits but I’m actually looking forward to his bc he has a horrid mix of royal garments and astereotypical butcher outfit#speaking of butchers. butcher vanity? great song absolutely fits him. cannot stop listening to it#surprisingly him being like. a literal cannibal isn’t even all he does. that’s just a…little quirk of his#like ya’d think him eating people would be more important but nah. he’s a POET and a MAGICIAN 😤😤#I’d say he’s one of the most evil characters but…..kinda all of my characters are#sure bingo tries to eat people and bomb people’s homes but there are side characters who put acid in the water supply and aren’t punished#so bingo’s just par for the course honestly#the best thing he’s ever done is install an air conditioning unit. there wasn’t one before bc Mole (his mom) didn’t like them—#—which resulted in people keeling over from heat exhaustion a lot so. good job for fixing that bingo#it’s the bare minimum but that’s pretty good for him so he can have a round of applause for that#I think I might have mentioned Gerbombs in passing but I love them sm#they’re gerbils genetically engineered to blow up when pressure is placed on them#they’re adorable. thankfully they have no concept of death so they’re just chilling with no worries in the world#before you get sad. Sushi rescued most of the Gerbombs and now cares for them so happy ending#no Gerbombs shall die under her watch. I don’t think I could deal with it if too many Gerbombs died#although they’re called Gerbombs they’re actually more physically close to jerboas#they’re so cute. I should draw a Gerbomb sometime#(I should also probably rename them jerbombs considering they’re not gerbils but ehhhhhhhhhhhhh)
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ok look, i don't normally do that because i just don't ship real people but since everyone is talking about this lately... i just read the forest fic for the first time ever.
#somebody kill me now please i feel like my brain is broken i don't know what's happening anymore#is josh even real#i wasted so much time on this and i don't know what to think#it's kinda good tho?#like... i absolutely loved all those forest references#it's one of my favourite songs ever#the entire concept was really interesting and ngl i actually had fun and it was beautifully written#but jesus was it weird#wild even#like genuinely what the fuck#i'm confused i need help mom come pick me up#in my defense i only did that becase all of you were saying it's a part of navigating mv now so i had to check what's the big deal#and boy#you were right#they truly did that and i hate them for it#i bet tyler read it and fucking loved it lmao#i'm gonna. die now#twenty one pilots#the forest fic#i say whatever and whatever that i want*
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Sometimes I feel like I don't care what other people think and other times. Sigh
#here's the thing#i love my mom but alas! we don't have the same taste in everything#and i've accepted that! i just watch the stuff she wouldn't like on my own!#except. now i don't know how to tell what she would like that i find fun#and i just assume she wouldn't like anything i like#and just. ugh#i both want to introduce her to the stuff i love#and am scared that she'll hate it so i shouldn't even try#but i think she might like it! but what if she DOESN'T ya know?#then i'll just be devastated forever and ever#not really but i feel bad about wasting her time and/or boring her#and it's just FRUSTRATING#cause my mom is honestly one of my best friends#and i love sharing my favorite things with my favorite people#but for some reason i'm very scared she will not share my love for this stuff#(not much in specific btw. just stuff in general)#it's weird because i don't get that sad when my friends don't share the same love for stuff as i do#(a little sad but it's not the end of the world)#but i do not enjoy introducing my mom to stuff and having her not like it#OH maybe it's recommending something to someone and that person watches it on their own#versus watching something with someone side by side and having to suffer through their reactions or non reactions#it's just something i gotta get over#but it's HARD
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My moms boyfriend is such an asshole sometimes it loops back around to being really fucking funny. "We shouldn't lose an hour getting sandwiches for lunch" it's called eating??? What the fuck???
#especially considering the alternative hes offering is for me and my mom to cook#lmao of course YOU think that takes less time than going out to eat#next time theyre not fucking coming since they hate staying in my city so much oh my god#like. holy shit dude you insisted to do this and now you're complaining its a waste of time... what about the time and energy ill waste#listening to you whine every single second#as tragic as the idea of losing my family over my transition is#losing this guy will probably be fine
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#idk why this is happening to me. literally no reason#i’m at work & i’m so anxious i feel like i’m gonna be sick#i accidentally dropped my bag this morning on my way out and woke up my mom and she was mad but I figured it’ll pass while I’m at work#idk why it’s ruining my whole ass day i just have this crippling feeling that everyone hates me and I’m gonna get in trouble#my brain keeps spiraling into scenarios where horrible things happen and I’m hated and in trouble when literally nothing is happening#and i know i’m just wasting my life away worried for a spell and then it goes away at a point and then it comes back#i just need people to be nice to me and tell me it’s gonna be okay idk why I’m like this#tw vent#rose.txt
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OK SO
good news: on sunday, i'm probably going to see a play my friend is in to support him!!
bad news: my mom is forcing me to bring her with me, and the play is about gay people (in my friend's words) and my mom's quite homophobic :(
#aggie posts#tw queerphobia#rant in tags#my friend is also queer (and so am i obviously) but that's for another day#honestly idk what to dooooo#i only have 2 choices: not attend the play; waste a ticket and potentially disappoint my friend#or to attend the play and see my friend perform but hear my mom's gross comments and be extra critical of me and/or my friend#and then she potentially uses this against me and forces me to stop being friends with him or smth worse </3#idk which is worse#i just hate that i'm never allowed to go alone to places; especially college; like HELLO??? I LITERALY ATTEND IT????#and i have a Not so Good history of my parents hating my friends
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bestie bought me mcdonalds Immediately after i binged on potato salad so guess what had to come up lol
#at least it was easy and i didnt have to strain too hard#but still. purging feels like wasting and i hate wasting food#especially when its homemade by my mom yk#but ohhh well i got macdoodle
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I am so fucking sick of living with my roommate and his fuck ass boyfriend. Also watching my roommate burn every single one of his (already rather minimal, I might add) bridges for this guy is also kind of painful but also his relationship with me is one of said bridges so I'm almost past the point of even feeling bad for him lmao
#i have had to piss for probably the better part of an hour now#because they decided to take a shower together and have been in there for well OVER an hour now#and this is a nightly occurence atp sometimes MULTIPLE times a day#we have one bathroom.... can yall not be considerate enough to not be in there for up to TWO HOURS AT A TIME???#also it's such a waste of fucking water....#idk we've hit a point where i literally hear the bf doing anything and i get pissed off#but also tell me why i'm sitting in my room (which shares a wall with the bathroom) and i can hear this man hacking and spitting shit up#and this is also something that happens multiple times a day#like.... dude.... why are you spitting up toothpaste so fucking loudly oh my fucking god#but yeah no i'm like my roommate's only friend atp and he's about to not have me lmao like we're about to reach#'i'm cutting you off when i move out' levels of me being pissed off with this whole situation type shit#and apparently the bf convinced him to come out to his family which his mom was chill which is good#his dad's side of the family though....? not great. and my roommate KNEW that would be the case cuz we'd talked about it before#also love that my roommate has constantly talked about moving out of the city we live in because he hates and also there's no good career#opportunities for him here (which is true)#and now. MAGICALLY. he's like 'idk i think it'd be best for me to stay here'#like oh my GOD???? are you hearing yourself???? are you fucking stupid???? you fucking hate it here???#but sure throw your life away and ruin all your meaningful relationships for a guy you met six months ago jfc#and the thing is i *know* my roommate we've been close CLOSE friends for nearly a decade now#i know he is not like this.... like yeah he's being insane by allowing this but also i know these aren't the kinds of decisions he would ma#and also i know he wouldn't treat me like this all on his own#it's the deranged fucking control freak of a guy he decided to date and my roommate has too many of his own issues to put his foot down#about certain things and tell the guy no so he's just allowing him to completely take over his life#and fuck everything up until the bf is the only thing he has left once it's all said and done#and yeah. it's painful to watch. but also wtf am i supposed to do because obviously my opinion is not respected nor wanted regarding this#that has been made PAINFULLY clear#ugh this is so fucking horrendous#what is it with ppl who start to date someone and then go clinically fucking insane and destroy their lives all for this one person#who. realistically. they barely know in comparison to all the other ppl in their life#like explain it to me jfc
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honestly really need to curb my phone addiction and i’ve been looking into dumbphones lately as an alternative for when i’m out and about and like. say what you will about brand consumerism but i am a simple man and the barbie phone is calling to me
#NGL i liked the barbie movie i didn’t think it was anything exceptional but it was good#i probably wouldn’t get a whole phone themed around it but it was like the only dumbphone i could find that came in a cute color#and worked with us networks so. idk why not#i have like hundreds of dollars sitting in my account unused from a summer job but the little gollum in the back of my brain#is like that’s My money. that belongs to Me. and it hurts to spend even when i have no actual plans for it#so ditching my phone to stop feeling like i’m wasting my adolescence is as good a use as any#in a perfect world i would just stop taking my phone to school but i need music to calm my social anxiety on the walk#and i’m not playing games with the american public school system re: having a way to contact people in an emergency#i would feel kinda stupid buying it around now because i already gave my parents my wishlist and i don’t wanna seem ungrateful#but if i do end up buying it maybe i’ll do a review on here at some point. it looks really cute and there’s so many things i want to do#that having my phone as a distraction all the time makes difficult. read more learn to skateboard and crochet keep up with my spanish#start on hebrew and maybe arabic. pick up viola again. hang out with my friends finally get a permit and a part time job study for the sat#stop procrastinating my homework all the time!!!#like hate to say it but my mom was right sometimes it really is That Damn Phone™️#i don’t want to look back when i’m like thirty and go “wow i really threw away my high school years” yanno
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*Through gritted teeth* i must not kill myself i must not kill myself i must not kill myself i must not kill myself i must not kill myself i must not kill myself i must not-
#Don't take this seriously#It's just i have so much work to do and everytime i make slight headway more work gets added and i am tired#My exam starts from 5th december#Before i even begin to start studying i have to write down like 6 reports#And as if that's not enough my mom is forcing me to go with my grandma to a different city like 2 hours away#For some stupid work#I hate travelling in general but this time it's travelling to a city i hate cause it sucks while my work is piling up#And with past 2 months of nothing but chaos work and traveling#So it's an entire day waste. Day i could have used to start working before more work pops up#Empty salt#I hate it here#And my mom always does this. Just springs plans on me without asking if i can or want to go#And then expect me to deal with it
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