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letstalkaboutshtufff · 4 years ago

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A Bad Feeling Pt 2

Levi x reader

Pt 2 (Final part)

Pairing : Levi x Cadet reader

Warnings: mentions of attempted rape, mentions of injury, cursing, violence. 18+ only please

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Hey guys! Thank you all so much for the wonderful comments! You're all amazing! I did my best to write Levi not ooc, so please lemme know if I did an ok job. This chapter was hard to write so please lemme know what you think! Enjoy!

"Look at me" he was less angry now and more concerned. Because although he would never admit it. He cared for his team deeply and hated to see any of them hurt.

Knowing you couldn't disobey you sucked in a breath and slowly lifted your head up.

And when Levi's steel eyes met your teary ones they turned into one of shock.

Slowly his eyes travelled over your form. His eye brows furrowed at the grip marks that covered your chin. He looked down further and saw that both your wrists were red. His eyes travelled back up and his whole body froze when he saw the angry looking bruise peeking from under your collar.

He stood there in shock for a moment before snapping out it.

"Y/n.." he started slowly, almost gently.

"Tell me what happened" he clenched his jaw when he realized how scared you look. It did not sit well with him that a girl as strong as you ended up in this state.

Tell him?? I can't... Oro said that he would-!

"I-I c-can't" you closed your eyes feeling completely overwhelmed. Levi was going to be so angry with you, but you couldn't risk being expelled from the survey corps.

Had your eyes been open you would've seen the flash of concern that crossed his usually stoic features. Knowing he wouldnt get anywhere with you in that state he asked you to follow him. Not knowing what else to do you did...

************************************

Silently he led you to a room you had never seen before. It was neat and organized, and off to the side you saw a small stove and sink.

You were so out of it, the shock taking over that you didnt even remember being sat down at a small table.

You stared at the wood in silence, listening to some clanging around you for several minutes but snapped out of it when a small plate and tea cup full of something steaming and sweet smelling was put in front of you.

Wordlessly you looked up at your captain who took a seat near you, but far away enough not to add to your nervousness.

"Drink, it'll help" he ordered quietly. And so you did. You both sat in silence until the last drop was gone. You thought he would yell at the clattering noise your cup made every time your shakey hands grabbed it but he didnt. He sat there quiet and silent.

When you were done you let out a small thank you. You felt a tiny bit less shakey but no where near relaxed. How could you be?

Levi silently took the cup, and deposited it in the sink.

When he was finished, he made his way back to you and sat down.

"Y/n, I know you don't wanna talk, but I need to know what happened" he started calmly.

You looked into his eyes and saw that he was patient and not at all angry.

Could you tell him the truth? Oro said that he would ruin your future but if you told captain Levi, would he protect you? Despite his harsh demeanor you knew that Levi did care and protect his team when it came down to it. Even his harsh disciplines were usually for the best. Even if we couldn't see it.

But even so...Oro is his friend... way longer than I've been his cadet...what if I tell him and he talks to Oro and oro tells him something else that he believes over me.

Levi noticed the hitch in your breath and tried to calm you down once more, "Listen to me y/n, Its my job to look out for you, you're safe now" he promised gently, well as gently as he levi could be) you looked and saw sincerety in his orbs. Your mouth formed the shape to speak. But you still were not able.

"If you're not able to tell me what happened yet, I need you to at least give me a name" he tried to reason. You couldn't believe how calm and patient he was being with you. You so desperately wanted to tell him. But you were terrified.

"I-I'm afraid.." you admitted quietly in shame..

Levi felt anger rise within him, not at you no, but at whoever made you like this. He'd seen you take down titans like it was playtime at school. And now you were shaking like a leaf afraid of something he still had no idea what/who caused this.

"Like I said you're safe now-"

" Thats not.." you cut him off, "I-I'm afraid you won't take.... my side.." you admitted as a fresh set of tears ran down your face.

His eyes widened a little at this, did you not trust him?

"Y/n, listen to me" he waited until you raised your teary eyes up to meet his once more.

"You have proven yourself to be nothing but trustworthy during your time as my cadet. You have my word that no matter what you say, I will believe you" he said with finality.

And that was all you needed to hear to unlock the fear that held you back.

"Oro" you whispered.

His eyes widened in utter shock before turning into quiet rage.

"Oro did this.."

************************************

Levi did a remarkable job of holding in his emotions as you told him what happened. You didn't do it all at once. You kept having to pause to collect yourself. And some things were harder to say than others. But slowly you told him everything, his words and what he did.

The whole time you couldn't bring yourself to look at him. Afraid of what emotions his face held. But when you were finished and he stood up, you couldn't help but steal a glance.

You sucked in a breath.

*Ok small teeny tiny spoiler in the next paragraph from season 3*

The last time you witnessed levi in that state was when he fought the beast titan. His body was eerily calm, but his eyes. His eyes held death.

"Stay here" and with that he was gone and you were alone...

************************************

It was torture waiting in that room. What was he going to do? The anxiety of waiting and doing nothing was killing you.

The panic mixed with exhaustion was such a strange feeling to you. Your mind was racing but your body felt on the verge on collapse.

Sighing you threw your head on the table and tucked your arms underneath.

You couldn't help but let your eyes droop.

You were somewhere between a light sleep and a deep one when the click of a door opening made you jolt awake.

"Heichou.." you went to stand but he motioned for you to stay put. To be honest you weren't sure you could stay upright. It felt like you had been thrown off a roof.

"W-what happened?" You couldn't wait another second before asking.

He stared at you for a moment, much more calm than when he had left earlier. "It's taken care of" he said finally.

You waited a few seconds for him to continue but he didn't.

"Um, by taken care of you mean...?" you nervously fidgeted with your hands.

He sighed and walked over to a nearby cabinet, not facing you he replied, "I mean that bastard won't be bothering you or anyone else anymore" you were slightly frustrated by his lack of elaboration.

Before you could press any further he turned around and cut you off, "Forget about it now, we can discuss it in the morning." You nodded hesitantly although all you wanted was some answers.

It was then you noticed that Levi was holding a small med kit in his hands. Before you knew it, he was sitting next to you, scooting the chair slightly closer.

"Hand" you stared blankly at the outstretched hand for a moment in confusion.

Whats he?... oh!

You snapped out of it not wanting to annoy him after all he had done for you by taking too long.

And despite the situation, you somehow found the capacity to still blush like a school girl when his soft hands gripped yours with surprising gentleness.

A comfortable silence filled the room as he got to work tending to your wrists. With more care than you thought he was capable he applied a cool ointment and wrapped them delicately.

You didnt even realize you were crying until you saw a fat tear plop onto the table. Levi looked up at you, pausing his movements.

"S-sorry! I didn't mean to-sorry..."you babbled embarrassed, your words not really making sense. You suddenly felt bad for putting him through all this. And now you couldn't even stop crying like an idiot.

You squeezed your eyes trying to stop the flow, but for some reason you couldn't stop. All the panic and relief caused you to feel so overwhelmed you couldn't help but let it all out. You also couldn't help but to keep apologizing over and over.

"Don't apologize.." your breath hitched at the quiet kindness in his voice. He had surprised you at least 20 times tonight by how gentle he was being. You slowly opened your eyes letting the tears fall freely. It was like the floodgates had opened, "heichou..." you swiped a hand over trying to quell the tears, "thank you" you sobbed out sincerely, not holding back.

And for the 21 time that night you were in utter disbelief when Captain Levi, the cold hearted, sadistic, cruel leader of the survey corps turned in his chair, facing opposite of you, reached a hand over to cradle your head and pulled you into his shoulder.

"It's alright y/n...its alright..." he whispered holding you close. Your wide eyes eventually closed and you clutched the arm cradling you. It was warm and safe and secure, and your heart filled with happiness, because despite everything that had happened, you knew you always could trust him, and maybe it was selfish to think this but a part of you believed that out of everyone on his squad, he only had showed this kindness to you.

************************************

The next morning as you made your way into the hall for breakfast. You couldn't help but feel everything was a bit too normal. Despite your fears, people weren't whispering about you, or giving you looks.

Sighing you found your usual spot by Sasha and Mikasa. Luckily the Mark's on your chin had lessened enough to where you could pass it off as a "I fell out of be and hit my chin on the floor" kinda thing.

After some time the boys joined as well,

"Ne did you guys hear?!" Armin exclaimed suddenly as he placed his tray down.

"Hear what?" Eren asked chewing on a piece of bread.

"About Captain Oro!" At that you felt your heart skip a beat.

Shit, what had he heard?

"What about him?" He asked raising a eyebrow.

"He was arrested!"

"What?!"

"No way!"

"There's no way!" They all were in shock.

"Its true!" He exclaimed.

"I was on my way to deliver some things to Hange-San when I saw him get dragged away by the police! And get this, he was all bloody and bruised! Like he had just been in a fight or something! They were practically carrying him!"

What?! Did Captain Levi...?!?

"Why was he arrested??" Mikasa chimed in.

"I don't know, I asked around but no one seems to know anything.."

"Huh, weird.. I wonder what happend" one of them responded.

One day you would tell them what happened but for now you decided to keep quiet.

Suddenly a flash of raven hair caught your attention. You spotted the captain making his way to Hanges table across the room. When he caught your gaze you couldn't help the small rush of heat and found your lips pulling up into a grateful smile.

He nodded simply and continued on.

Despite everything people said about him, he truly was a good person. And you couldn't help but feel a little giddy at the thought that he beat up Oro because he hurt you.

You still felt the rush of heat at the memories of last night and how he held you. After your cries had quieted down he escorted you to your room and told you to get some sleep.

You thanked him again and that was that. All night all you could think about was- well of course everything that happened- but also, the gentle way Levi tended to your wrists, the way he held your head close, the way he smelled up close the way-

"Hey y/n?" Jean leaned over with an eyebrow quirked.

"Y-yeah?"

"Why are you so red?"

Shit

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And that's the end! I hope the ending was everything you guys were hoping for, thank you all for taking the time to read it. I hope Levi didn't seem to ooc. Until next time!

@justanotherlifeff @fangirlingonrhys @haikoo @peculiarinsomniac @charlie-rose-thegay @babyshinso28 @your-daily-dose-of-fangirl @eleventhdoctorsangel @cravrat @hawkssnugget @kimbapkidding1004 @xruna @huffelpuffers @sofflepoffle @sunisenpai @kuromihomii @deadcalmlol @smokeychan1216

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the-gay-trashmouth · 3 years ago

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So I’m the worst. As soon as I started the Newsies Gift Exchange my mental health took a nose dive and my school decided to ramp up the assignments to 100. I never forgot and I have been working on it when I had the time so here it is! I'm so sorry I'm late @annihilatedthenightstalker . I hope you enjoy my very very late gift. I am so sorry.

Prompt- Jack's really scared for some reason and David sees him cry for the first time, its then he finds out just how touch-starved Jack is.

If there was one thing David knew, it was that Jack Kelly would be the death of him. He wasn’t even mad about it, it was just a simple fact of life that he had come to accept.

That's what he thought as Sarah shoved him awake, telling him in no kind words that his Cowboy was at the window and he needed to go take care of it. He yawned before pushing off the bed and making his way to the open window where Jack did, in fact, sit waiting for him.

He leaned out the window, fixing him with an unimpressed look. “What are you doin’ here so late? Don’t ya have a bed waitin’ at the lodge?”

Jack shrugged, but he was shaking like he’d seen a ghost. David’s expression went from annoyed to concerned as Jack spoke.

“Yeah, well, I couldn’t sleep none and I thought- well you like all that star stuff and the skies real clear so-” he gestured shakily, “I thought we could go watch some, may-maybe you could tell me all that stuff you learned about the patterns and stuff.”

David watched him carefully, watched the way he couldn’t sit still, the way he was glancing around like something would pop out to get him any second now. After a moment he sighed, “yeah… yeah okay Jackie. Lemme get dressed and I’ll meet ya on the roof, a’ight?”

Jack nodded quickly, already climbing the ladder. David watched him for a moment, concern twisting in his chest. He turned back to see Sarah watching him with tired eyes.

“That’s not what I meant when I said make him go away,” she said flatly.

David shrugged, “he doesn't look too good, Saz. I can’t just let him go wander the streets like this,” he argued, though Sarah didn’t look convinced. Thankfully, she didn’t push it, just rolled her eyes and laid back down.

“Whatever, don’t complain to me when you're exhausted tomorrow.”

He sighed, tugging a patched sweater over his undershirt and fastening his suspenders to his pants. She had a point, but he wasn’t about to admit it. Besides, he couldn’t just leave Jack to his own devices, not when he’s like this.

When he pulled himself up to the roof, the first thing he saw was Jack, still pacing with his hands still shaking. David tried to shake off his anxiety as he pushed himself to a stand, but the lingering clench of concern twisted around his heart. He didn’t like seeing Jack like this, it hurt too much.

“You’re gonna walk a hole in your shoes if you keep that up,” Jack jumped at his voice, but a shaky grin still found its way onto his face.

“Oh well, you could patch ‘em up for me, couldn’t ya Dave?”

David rolled his eyes, nudging Jack’s shoulder as he passed, “might could, question is would I?” he pulled one of his sheets down from the line before sitting down.

Jack just grinned, taking his place beside him, “‘course ya’ would, what kind a partner wouldn’t?”

He snorted, nudging Jack’s shoulder with his own. He was right, of course, Dave would do anything he could for him- Jack knew damn well he would too. Everyone did.

“Keep tellin’ yourself that, Kelly.”

Jack grinned, nudging him back before leaning on his hands to look at the sky. David followed suit- Jack was right. It was an incredibly clear night. He could see so many stars, he could even make out a few major constellations.

After a moment of silence Jack elbowed him in the ribs, pointing up to the stars, “That one there’s the big dipper, ain’t it?”

David followed his finger, trying to connect the pattern he was seeing. It was a bit difficult because his hands were still shaking. “Yeah, I think so- ya know the big dipper’s just a part of a bigger constellation, Ursa Major. A bear.”

Jack tilted his head, dropping his arm to his side and squinting at the sky, “don’t look like no bear to me.”

The other boy snorted, using his own hand to point out the rest of the pattern, “yeah see- there's the head and the big body, and those little stars make the legs- see? Bear.” Jack just tilted his head farther, blonde hair falling into his face.

“I don’t- hang on, yeah. Yeah I see what you mean, ‘s like one of them stick figures, right?”

“Yeah, basically, I mean it’s really abstract. See, right near it is Leo, it’s supposed to be a lion.”

Jack followed his finger again, watching as he pointed out the stars and traced the lines. Jack squinted at it, “yeah- it just looks like a bunch a dots to me”

David snorted, looking over to see Jack watching him with a soft smile. He tilted his head, nudging Jack’s shoulder again. As much as he would love to go on and on about the stars and the stories behind him, he had to find out what was wrong.

“So, I know ya didn’t come here lookin for a lesson on astronomy. What’s wrong with ya? Somethin’ happen with the boys?”

Jack froze, still staring at the sky. David could see him trying to keep his easy grin but it was forced. Somehow that hurt worse than a frown.

“Nah Dave, nothin’ happened with them…” he trailed off, picking at the concrete beneath him.

“Well what’s wrong? And don’t say nothin- I know when you’re lyin.”

“Aw c’mon, you wound me! I don’t lie-”

David cut him off, rolling his eyes, “fine. ‘Improvin’ the truth’ or whatever- not much of a difference.”

Jack chuckles, leaning forward to rest his chin on his knees. “Yeah, you’se too observant for ya’ own good sometimes.”

“And you’re too stubborn for yours,” he shot back, taking a breath before continuing to speak, voice much softer this time, “what’s eatin’ at ya, Jackie?”

Jack shuddered, face hidden behind his messy bangs. He was quiet for a moment before he muttered something just under his breath.

“I can’t hear ya, Jack,” he said plainly, leaning forward to try and catch his eyes. Jack just looked away,

“My Pa…. he’s… Spots just got news that he got out a’ the pen,” David’s breath caught in his throat as Jack spoke, his words shaking.

“Oh shit,” he breathed. For once, The Walking Mouth had been rendered speechless. Jack laughed, rough and strained.

“Yeah.. oh shit..” he pulled his legs up to his chest and rested his chin on his knees. David set a hand on his shoulder, mind too frantic to linger on the way Jack tensed under his touch.

“Are you okay? He- he don’t know where you’se stayin’ does he? Shit- he can’t- Jackie..” now it was David’s turn to shake, the hand not gripping Jack’s shoulder running through his curly bed head. Jack shrugged, adamantly refusing to look at him. David cut himself off, words dying in his throat.

“Jackie…” he dropped the hand from his hair to his lap, “what are you gonna do?”

Jack shrugged again, but David could feel his shoulders begin to shake. David waited for a moment as Jack sucked in a shaky breath. “I don’t know Dave… I mean I don’t- I don’t think he knows where I’se stayin’ but what if he does?”

David let the hand on his shoulder drop to his back, rubbing small circles into the thin fabric of his shirt like his mama would do when he was in a state. He didn’t know what to say and his mind was racing to come up with something. Something to fix it, something to make it all better.

Nothing came to mind.

Jack was still shaking but he leaned into Davey’s touch, taking in shuddering breaths as he hid his face in his knees. “Dave I- I don’t know what I’m gonna do…”

When he finally looked up, there were tears in his eyes. Davey’s heart clenched as he sucked in a harsh breath. Jack never cried- sure he got upset, angry enough to punch a hole through a wall or anxious to where he couldn’t breathe, but he never cried.

Davey didn’t know what to do with that.

“I’m scared, Dave…”

That was the final straw. David gripped Jack’s shirt with shaking hands and jerked him into his long arms. He wrapped around him, using his height to his advantage as he enveloped Jack in a shaking embrace.

“Oh Jackie…” he buried his nose in his hair, pushing back his own tears.

Jack froze for a moment, just long enough for David to worry he’d gone too far before there were fingers digging into his back and Jack “Cowboy” Kelly was sobbing into his shoulder.

“I- fuck Dave-” David shushed him as he cried, arms tightening around him as the older boy cried his eyes out into his shoulder. He could feel his sleeves soaking through but that was the least of his worries right now. He was too busy trying to comfort the shaking mass of boy in his arms to give a dmn about his stupid shirt.

“It’s okay Jackie- let it all out. It’ll be okay. We’ll figure it out. You can stay with us or- or hell I'm sure Spotty would let ya crash at the Brooklyn Lodge if he shows up in ‘Hattan,” he spoke frantically into Jack’s hair, trying everything to reassure him that there was no way his father would get anywhere near him. Jack just shudder out something between a laugh and a sob.

“Spotty don’t let no one but Racer stay at the lodge,”

“Spotty ain’t gonna leave you on the streets Jackie,” David pulled back just a bit, ignoring the soft whine that came from Jack, “none of us will, for that matter. You’se family, Jackie, an’ family don’t let family suffer.”

Jack blinked at him, tears still flowing from his eyes. When he spoke it was broken and strained, “you’re too good to me, Dave-”

David cut him off, thumbing away his tears, “no- people just ain’t been good enough.”

Jack sniffled, leaning into his palm. “Can I…. shit, can I stay here? Just for tonight. I don’t.. I don’t wanna walk back alone…”

Davey managed a smile, hand still cupping his cheek, “Jackie, you can stay as long as you want.”

#Stari writes #Newsies #javid #canon era #newsies fic #gift exchange #i am so sorry i am so late

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dadgonedeku · 4 years ago

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Hi let me start by saying that your writing is immaculate💖👌 may I request a scenario where Bakugou has a gf that has always struggled with deprssion in her life and he knows about if? Like he noticed how she's been isolating herself lately and know it's getting bad so he enters her room and finds her laying in bed, staring at the roof with tears but no sound or emotions just numb. And bakugou takes care of her and helps her with it :) I hope it's not too much. Have a nice day/night 💞💞

Bakugou taking care of his depressed s/o!

💥~Hello love! Thank you for requesting and I hope these hcs are okay!! I apologize they’re so late! Thank you so much for the kind words!! 💝

💥~SFW & Fem!Reader

💥~Happy Reading!

💥~ Ever since the two of you had gotten close as friends he had known about it. You had told him everything on one particularly bad night, where you couldn’t stop shaking and crying no matter how hard you tried. He took care of you then and pulled you out of the void.

💥~ Now you needed him to do it again, this time as your boyfriend, not the former.

💥~ Your depression seemed to hit you in waves almost, a few days being better than others. But some days were almost too difficult to bare, some days all you wanted to do was force yourself to stop crying or shaking, but you couldn’t no matter how hard you tried. You lost count of the amount of times you’d cried yourself to sleep.

💥~ That’s where he came in, to guide you back to the surface and pull you from your thoughts, your anxieties, and most importantly your demons. Through it all he stayed, and you couldn’t help but wonder why. Weren’t you a burden? Why on Earth would he stay if he had to take care of you all the time? What have you done for him? You lost yourself in your thoughts once more, staring into the plain wall ahead of you as you sat on the edge of your bed. You were crying, you could feel the tears, but part of you just couldn’t muster the strength to wipe them away. The void had trapped you yet again.

💥~ Bakugou had become quite good at observing your behaviors, reading your moods quickly and adjusting to them accordingly. He would never fight with you if it wasn’t necessary, and his patience was better with you than anyone else he knew.

💥~ He knew you like the back of his hand, and the same would go for you too. You gave him a safe place to express his feelings whenever he needed to, and in turn he would take care of you when you needed it. It never bothered him, so why did you feel so awful about it. Why did you feel like such a burden?

💥~ You were aware that he had taken notice of your bad moods lately. You barely ate, most times barely slept. You were mentally and emotionally exhausted all the time, and your motivation would tank to an all time low. It was almost like a routine, and you hated it. Why couldn’t you just feel productive for once in your life? Living shouldn’t feel like such a struggle.

💥~ Bakugou stops outside of your door, a backpack slung onto one shoulder as he holds two knuckles up to knock on your door. He hesitates though, is this right? It was right every other time. His gut was screaming at him to check on you, to be with you and hold you and take care of you. He didn’t know how though, he was emotionally stunted himself, but when it came to you, he always knew exactly what to do.

💥~ Fuck it, he knocks, calloused knuckles gently rapping on the wood of your door. Your eyes move to look, but that’s all you feel like doing. He knows to come in whenever he wants to, and frankly you didn’t feel like moving.

💥~ “Hey s/o, the hell are doing ignoring my calls like that? You in there?”

💥~ That’s when the tears begin spill over even more, and the sob that you let go of sends a harsh shiver through your body.

💥~ He opens the door slowly and his heart drops at the sight of you. It’s happening again. Whenever you didn’t text or call him back without reason he knew. He drops his bag at the edge of your bed as he pads over to you, gently taking you in his arms. You cling to him like a baby, wrapping your smaller arms around his neck and burying your head in his chest. He moves you to sit on his lap against the headboard, one of his hands rubbing circles into your back while the other dries your tears.

💥~ “Talk to me s/o, what’s going on?” He’s doing what he always does, and you respond in the same way too. You don’t know, you’re trapped in your head again and it’s hard to get out. You want out, you want him to pull you out like he hero he is, you want him to save you like he always does.

💥~ He lets your tears soak into the fabric of his tank top, and he presses a short kiss to the top of your head. His embrace is so warm, warm and safe and comforting. You feel the slight pressure of his strong forearms against your back as he holds you close. It’s like magic. You’re the only person who’s ever seen this side of him. He’s only like this with you, because you’re so much different than everyone else, so much better than everyone else. You were never just ‘some extra’ to him, that’s why he asked you to be his girlfriend. He had never cared about relationships or love until he met you. Your relationship was living proof that yes, even the hot headed and arrogant Katsuki Bakugou could find love.

💥~ “You wanna talk about it or something?” He presses on, placing another short kiss to the top of your head. You’re slowly coming back now, feeling a little more in tune with reality than before. You want to, you want to talk about it. You want to rant for hours. But you don’t know what to say...and frankly, you’d rather not think about it at all anymore.

💥~ You pull your body up a bit, letting go of his shirt and rubbing your eyes with your fingers. You sniffle and dry a few tears, your eyes locking with his. They’re so red, so calm yet so fiery. You loved them.

💥~ “Well?” Shit. You haven’t answered the question yet.

💥~ “...no.” Your voice cracks, weak and raspy from crying so much in so little time. He only nods and takes you in his hold again, cradling you softly against his chest. He’s strong, strong and sturdy and you know he’s not going anywhere anytime soon. You know he’ll stay with you for as long as you want him.

💥~ “I’m sorry s/o, I wish I could do more to help. But listen, those demon bastards in your head aren’t real, and whatever they’re telling you is wrong. You’re stronger than anyone I know, and you’re going to win this fight. I’ve got you the whole way through. We’ve made it this far, so let’s just keep on like we always do.”

💥~ You can only nod a little in response as tears start to pour again. He always knew exactly what to say didn’t he? Of course he did. He always had your back, and you already knew that the rest of night would be like this. You, fragile and vulnerable in the moment but still so safe and comfortable in your boyfriend’s strong arms. He always made you feel powerful, confident, and strong. Better days are ahead, you both know that.

💥~ He continues to hold and caress you for what feels like hours, rubbing your back and placing a few gentle kisses to your skin every now and again. He mutters sweet praises to you, about how strong and beautiful you are to him. Soon enough you’re falling asleep in his hold, and he only smiles and kisses you again. Another night that’s like this, but he’s grateful that he can be there for you when you need him.

#bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha #headcanons #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #bakugou x reader #bakugou x fem!reader

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gaerli · 4 years ago

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Overthinking and Worrying

[Hawks x GN!Reader]

--SPOILER WARNING--

[Hawks is concerned because Y/N isn't sleeping--]

It has been a while since Hawks stayed up late, as he always sleeps after 2-3 hours after arriving home, leaving you awake by yourself. You didn’t complain honestly, you loved seeing your fiancé sleeping peacefully curling up to you and you especially loved how he has this childish smile of comfort and safety while sleeping when you pet his head gently.

While the winged hero could sleep peacefully, you on the other hand had a hard time catching sleep, and this problem has been occurring for a while, however you did not want to worry him so you kept it to yourself. After all, this isn't the first time you go through this problem before. But how come you cannot sleep? Anxiety and the stress of everything weights on your shoulder during the nights. Overthinking and worrying very much for your fiancé takes its’ toll on you, leaving you with so much adrenaline of stress to be able to catch sleep. And how the media (and even villains) keeps an eye on you and Hawks isn’t helping your case either…however you were able to get a bit of sleep and the sleep deprivation wasn’t very visible on you…

This has been going on for a while, however after recent events and after Hawks told you about what the commission have been planning as he trusts you enough to tell you as he knows you would never utter a single word or be suspicious when someone asks about Hawks, though, let’s say this alone have kept you up at night. You can’t fantom the idea of how in the living heck does the hero commission throw your fiancé out in such a dangerous mission without a second thought. This lack of sleep problem of yours has gotten worse after the war incident and Hawks gotten badly hurt to the point of almost losing his wings and life in the process.

Obviously the first weeks after Hawks was granted a long long hiatus from hero work to focus on his health was hard on both him and you. He kept waking up in cold sweat, tears and panic in his eyes and out of breath as he kept having nightmares of the fight with Dabi. When you asked him about what exactly went down, he couldn’t bring himself to say it which you respected and told him to tell you when he is ready. You kept being awake the first weeks for his sake, rarely caught sleep as not only your anxiety for his wellbeing is crash up the roof, but also you want to be ready whenever he was about to wake up in panic. This made your sleep deprivation even worse but you made sure to hide it as you wanted him and his wellbeing to be your priority #1.

After few weeks has passed, he has gotten better and he got the help he needed in order to deal with this borderline traumatizing event he went through and you were with him throughout the whole ordeal (he thanked whatever up there to have blessed him with someone like you in his life). However you on the other hand haven’t been able to get any sleep or any rest. And after a while it was nearly impossible to hide the sleep deprivation anymore as it was visible on you. Not to mention the fact that after Hawks managed to calm down from everything he did notice off stuff about you…

…he noticed that you barely have energy to continue with the day but keep pushing yourself as well as he is the first to sleep and last to wake up which proves his theory that you’re not sleeping.

He is concerned because you’re sleeping at all.

Hawks decided to confront you about this as now he is worried about your wellbeing. So while you two were cuddling in the couch, with him laying on your lap while you leaned against the couch cushion, he decided to ask you—

”Dove?”

”Mm?”

”When was the last time you’ve gotten a full 8 hour sleep?”

”…uh”

That question of his caught you off guard. How come he asks about your sleeping habit. This low-key made you nervous as you did not want to worry him with your problems-

”Ahah oh— w-w-well you see honey…I do get enough sle—”

”Don’t lie to me (Y/N), I know you well enough that when you begin to talk like this means you’re hiding something” he replied as he sat up and turned to around to face you, his face expression says it all. He is very concerned

”(Y/N)…dove…talk to me”

For some reason, the way he gently said that and the way he held your hands in his, looking into your eyes with love and care made you breakdown and cry which made the winged hero not hesitate to pull you into his embrace and hold you close.

”I’m sorry dove…I can guess partly on the reason for the lack of sleep…” he said in a low voice, feeling guilty over the fact he made the love of his life this worry to the point of lack of sleep

”N-No honey, it i-isn’t only because of what happened to you” you managed to say, clutching to his shirt. After that you two didn’t say anything. Just you quietly sobbing onto Hawks chest while he held you close, not bothering hiding the pain he felt for seeing you in such state.

After a bit, you managed to calm down and Hawks handed you napkins to blow your nose while brushed away your tears.

”…during the night…I have a bad habit of overthinking and worrying to the point I can’t sleep” you said while looking down, feeling a bit embarrassed about talking about this as this is the first time in a long time that you actually talk about the sleeping problem.

”How come I did not know about this?” ”Because…I didn’t want to bother you Kei…”

His expression softened and he smiled gently, caressing your cheek affectionately.

”Dove…you would never bother me…I love you and I want to be by your side the same way you are by my side” Hawks said as he leaned to capture your lips in a gentle kiss, which you gladly returned.

”…Kei…I love you”

”I love you too (Y/N)…but we gotta find a way to help you get more sleep”

”B-But how?” You asked, genuinely not knowing how. Hawks thought for a bit until he thought of an idea

”I think I know how… you said you cannot sleep because of anxiety and worrying right?”

”And overthinking…s-sometimes” you said while looking aside a bit flustered

”Overthinking, right. So I wanna know, what exactly are you worrying and overthinking about to the point of not sleeping- is it nightmares?”

”N-no!! I barely get these nowadays b-but” you looked down, a bit too shy to say it out loud, but at this point, Hawks is your fiancé, you two should tell each other everything, including insecurities ’He gotta know…he needs to know…’ you took a deep breath, looking up at Hawks who was waiting for your answer attentively-

”I…feel like I am a huge burden to you…I see what the media is saying about our relationship and I know the villains are still after not only you but me- d-don’t get me wrong I don’t care most of the time!!—” You tried to explain yourself, but then looked down and continued ”—…but…I feel like I am an extra burden to you, I feel like I’m holding you back…I feel like the media and the villains are always keeping an extra eye on you because of me as they think I am your weakpo—”

”You’re my weakpoint, as in I would do anything to keep you safe and alive!”

”R-Right. B-but yeah anyways” you continued ”I feel like I am holding you back and that I am an extra baggage that you need to deal with as the same time as you deal with your own shit” you sighed, taking a deep breath.

”Not to mention…how much I worry for your well being and how much the hero commission is pushing you beyond your limits and to the extreme…” you looked up at him with worry in your eyes ”Keigo I am worried about you and about your reputation”

Hawks was silent for a moment, taking in everything. He understands it all now.

”I see…(Y/N) I am so sorry I caus—” ”N-No Kei honey it is not your fault!!” You quickly reassured him to which he smiled gently to.

”I love you (Y/N) and I want you to know that you are never holding me back, you are never bothering me and I don’t give two shits about reputation or what the stupid hero commission wants from me. I am so sorry that I keep worry you tho, you don’t deserve to be sleep deprived over me but just you know—” he leaned close so that his forehead touches yours, smiling at you with love and affection in his eyes

”—that I love you. So much dove, the fact that you worry for me means that you care about me and…just thank you, for everything”

You looked at him with a gentle smile yourself and chuckled a bit.

”No need to thank me sweetheart. You are my everything”

He leaned to give you a kiss on the lips, filled with love and affection, a kiss worth thousands of words of love.

”Tonight (Y/N)…it is all about you” he said after you two pulled away from the kiss. ”Tonight…let me take care of you”

You smiled, a bit doozy after the kiss. You did not complain or protest against it. After all— when Hawks is being the big spoon and in charge, he knows how to make you feel comfortable and loved, safe and protected, tucked away from the cruel world in the bubble of love.

”Alright…” you said as Hawks stood up, carrying you bridal style up to your shared bedroom—

As you two are laying on the bed, with you laying on Hawks’ chest, his heart-beatings calms you down a lot, however before those thoughts even had the time to creep up into your head, Hawks began softly speak reassuring and loved filled words while gently running his fingers from your neck down to your back before caressing your head.

”I’ve got you (Y/N)…I’ve got you” he managed to say which made you smile. Oh how lucky you are to have someone as loving as him in your life. However as soon as he began speak about how you two’s future will be after marrying and after creating the family you both want with each other and how much he is looking forward spending the rest of his life with you, you felt a feeling of happiness and joy within your heart. You’ve forgotten to even think of how you both will have your future with each other because of the negative overthinking. This felt so nice to hear and you even imagined how your and Hawks’ kids will look like and how the wedding will be.

Not gonna lie, this lulled you to sleep slowly and surely. You yawned a bit before snuggling closer into his chest with a dorky smile on your face.

”Thank you Kei…I love you”

And soon, you found yourself drifting to sleep and not long after staring to snore a bit. When Hawks heard you snore a bit (which he adores by the way), a smile plastered on his face and leaned to kiss your head adjusting himself before cuddling you close and drifting to sleep himself.

”Good night dove…the love of my life”

To say you two had the best sleep that night is an understatement and for the first time in so long, you slept properly and long enough as well as—

—this was the best sleep you’ve ever had and it is all thanks to your birdman fiancé.

AUTHOR NOTE: Hello!! This is my part of the collab with my friends at BNHA Sanctuary (btw, I love you all so much over there, dope ass people 100/10 I would forever protect).

I also wanna apologize if Hawks is a bit OOC and I wanna apologize for my English and grammar errors as well as the inability to properly express the fic properly, English is not my first or second language and I am still learning it ahaha. *Sweats in Swedish*

Anyways! Reader is gender-neutral here and I’m gonna try to be as inclusive as I can be. I based the events in this fic loosely on the manga and on what I went through back when I had a very bad case of insomnia, ahaha enjoy!!

P.S-- please don’t hesitate to tell me how to improve as I am still working on being a better writer. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS ACCEPTED AND ENCOURAGED IN ORDER FOR ME TO PROVIDE BETTER CONTENT AND FICS FOR YOU GUYS!!

#bnhasanctuarycollab #hawks x reader #keigo takami x reader #keigo takami #hawks #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha x reader #reader insert #takami keigo x reader #quenixy talks #scenarios #bnha keigo #mha keigo #bnha keigo takami #bnha hawks #mha keigo takami #reader scenario #mha x reader

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prouvaireafterdark · 4 years ago

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Honey, If You Stay

Enjoy the next installment of my Michael Sanders AU, set sometime between Caught in the Moment and A Father Like That 💜

Also on AO3!

***

Michael has only just put his bedtime reading on irrigation systems on the floor beside his bed and turned in for the night when his phone buzzes loudly on his bedside table. He reaches for it immediately, unplugging the charger so he can pull it closer to his face. He has a single text from Alex, and another comes through as he’s opening it.

Are you awake?

Please tell me you’re awake.

A heavy feeling sinks into Michael’s gut as he reads the words—something doesn’t feel right. He quickly types out his reply.

Yeah, are you okay?

Alex’s reply comes not from his phone, but in the form of a soft knock on his bedroom window. Michael looks over to see Alex standing outside, drenched by the rain that’s been pouring down all night.

Michael leaps from his bed and rushes to the window. He opens it as far as it’ll go and Alex climbs inside. He reaches for Michael immediately, burying his face in Michael’s neck and breathing deep. Michael wraps his arms around him tight without a care for how wet he gets, anxiety buzzing under his skin.

“What happened?” Michael asks him.

Alex just shakes his head and holds on tighter. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Dread fills him even more, but as Alex shivers in his arms, Michael decides to shove that down and focus on warming him up—he knows what happens when humans stand in the rain too long and he doesn’t want Alex to get sick.

“You’re freezing, come on,” Michael says, tugging Alex toward his bedroom door.

Alex lets Michael lead him out of his bedroom and into the bathroom down the hall. He leans listlessly against the sink while Michael turns the shower on, holding his hand under the spray until he feels it reach a good temperature.

When he turns around, he sees Alex watching him with a complicated expression on his face. Now that they’re in the light, Michael can see he’s not wearing any eyeliner like he usually is. He isn’t sure what to make of that, but he doesn’t have time to dwell on it—Alex is dripping water all over the floor and he still needs to grab him something dry to change into. He just hopes he has a clean pair of underwear for him—he’s been putting off laundry day a little too long.

“Water should be warm enough now,” Michael says as he heads toward the door. “You can leave your wet clothes in the sink, I’ll wash them with mine tomorrow.”

Alex reaches for Michael’s hand as he’s about to leave. He catches him around the wrist, his fingers digging into his skin a little desperately. Michael turns around to look at him and finds Alex’s eyes glassy and wet, his breathing shallow.

Michael backtracks until he’s standing right in front of him again. Alex’s breathing starts to calm when Michael touches him, moving his free hand up to cradle Alex’s cheek delicately in his palm, so Michael leans in to kiss him, soft and sweet, offering him the only comfort he can think to give.

It works, Alex’s grip on his wrist loosening in relief.

“I’ll be right back, okay?” Michael tells him when he pulls away. “I’m just gonna get some pajamas and a towel for you.”

Alex visibly swallows before he nods.

Michael presses another gentle kiss to his cheek before he leaves the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

He sneaks back into his room and grabs his last clean pair of boxers and a t-shirt from his dresser before slipping into the hall to get a couple of fresh towels from the linen closet. When he reenters the bathroom, he finds Alex already in the shower. His clothes are piled in the sink, and his muddy shoes are on the floor near the cabinet.

Michael throws a towel on the floor and uses his foot to haphazardly wipe up the mess before he sets the clothes down on the closed toilet seat cover. He’s just hanging the towel up on the rack by the shower when the curtain pulls back and Michael looks over to see Alex peeking his head out, the color in his cheeks a healthy pink.

“You gonna join me?” Alex asks, and there’s a subtle, flirtatious twist to his lips that doesn’t quite meet his eyes. It makes Michael hesitate, but if Alex wants him close right now, he can’t think of a single reason he should deny him.

“Yeah,” Michael answers, reaching back to strip off his shirt. He lets his bottoms pool at his feet before he steps into the shower.

As soon as he’s inside, Alex crowds him against the shower wall. The tile is cool against his back, a dizzying contrast to the heat of Alex’s hands on his hips and the hot water beating down around them. He feels Alex’s lips on his then, and his skin is soft as always, but he’s anything but gentle as he covers Michael’s mouth with harsh, biting kisses.

Michael usually loves it when Alex kisses him like this, loves to feel how much Alex wants him, how desperate he is to have him, but this… this feels different. It feels a little like Alex is trying to disappear inside his mouth, and it sours the pleasure coiling in Michael’s belly.

Alex didn’t stand in the rain for a fun midnight hook up, he reminds himself. Something’s wrong.

“Alex,” Michael gasps, tilting his head to get the space to speak, but Alex doesn’t stop kissing him. The grip on his hips tightens as he moves down Michael’s jaw to his throat. He sinks his teeth into the join of Michael’s neck and shoulder, and under normal circumstances Michael would find that brain-meltingly sexy, but right now it just makes the pit of his stomach drop. “Alex, stop, look at me.”

Alex does, his chest heaving as he wrenches himself away like he’s been burned.

“Shit, I’m—I’m sorry,” he gasps, eyes wide and devastated as he tries to put some distance between them, but Michael doesn’t let him go far, reaching for his waist to pull him back in.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Michael assures him, rubbing his palms against the smooth skin of Alex’s sides. “I’m not mad, it’s just—you’re upset.”

Alex looks away, swallowing hard.

Michael raises his right hand from Alex’s waist to tip his chin up until he can look him in the eye again. “What’s going on?” he asks, voice pitched low and soothing despite how unsettled he feels.

They stare at each other for a long minute, the hot water raining down upon them, before Alex’s eyes fill with tears and his face crumbles. Michael catches him as he pitches forward, his right hand immediately going to the back of Alex’s head while his left loops around his waist to hold Alex securely against him.

“Shh, I’m here, it’s okay,” he whispers in Alex’s ear, rocking him softly as he sobs into his neck. Alex’s hands slide uselessly against Michael’s skin as he tries to grab onto him, his chest shuddering with each breath he takes. Every gasp, every sob, every whimper is amplified in his ears by the acoustics of the shower, and Michael’s heart fucking shatters for him. He’s never seen Alex cry like this before. “You’re gonna be okay, baby, I promise,” he says thickly, his own eyes burning with tears. “Whatever it is, I’ve got you. I’ve got you.”

Alex doesn’t cry for more than a few minutes, but it’s long enough for the shitty water heater they’ve got to run out of hot water. Michael turns the shower off quickly in those precious few seconds before it turns from tepid to ice cold and reaches for the towel on the rack by the shower.

Michael towels Alex off first, starting with his hair and then moving down his body. Alex leans into him a little as he does it, allowing Michael the freedom to touch him however he needs to to get him dry. The intimacy of it strikes him—Alex is usually relentlessly self-sufficient, and Michael hasn’t been naked with anyone without some form of sex being involved since he was old enough to shower by himself. It feels important somehow, like they’ve reached a milestone, or a turning point maybe. Michael’s heart aches at how much Alex is trusting him right now.

“Go get dressed, okay?” Michael tells him once he’s finished. “I’ll be out in a second.”

“Okay,” Alex croaks and steps out of the shower.

Michael gets himself dried off as quick as he can and pulls on the clothes he’d been wearing before.

When they’re both fully clothed, they tip-toe into Michael’s bedroom. Alex climbs into Michael’s bed without a word, his back facing him. Michael slides right up against his back, and pulls the covers over them both. He nuzzles his face into the back of Alex’s neck and secures his arm tightly around his waist.

They’re both quiet for a long time, the only sounds to be heard their breathing and the soft patter of rain against the roof. Michael wants to ask him what happened again, but he doesn’t. Whatever it is, it can wait until morning. There’s only one thing Michael needs Alex to know before he loses him to sleep for the night.

“I love you,” Michael whispers, pressing a kiss to the spot behind Alex’s ear. “Whatever’s going on, I love you, and I’m here for you. I’m right here.”

Alex doesn’t respond, but Michael can hear his throat click as he swallows, so he doesn’t think he’s fallen asleep. A moment later, Alex reaches down to entwine their fingers together before bringing their joined hands to rest against his chest, right over his heart.

Michael thinks that’s the end of it, so he drops another kiss to the back of his head and closes his eyes. He’s just on the edge of sleep when he finally hears Alex speak.

“He hates me,” Alex says, so soft Michael barely hears it, but it sends ice shooting through his veins all the same.

Michael doesn’t need to ask who he means. When Alex doesn’t say anything else, he asks, “Did he hit you?”

Michael’s suspected for a while that Alex’s dad beats him, but Alex always shrugs him off whenever he brings it up. He’s never actually seen any marks on him to prove it either, but that doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Michael wasn’t in the foster system for long, but it was long enough for him to learn that there’s plenty of ways to hurt people without leaving any evidence.

Alex huffs a bitter laugh. “He didn’t need to.”

Michael pulls him back against his chest a little more firmly. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, not knowing what else he could possibly say to make Alex’s pain disappear.

Alex lifts their joined hands toward his mouth so he can kiss Michael’s fingers and keeps them there. The position is a little awkward for Michael, but he’d rather cut off his own arm than move an inch.

“I just don’t understand,” Alex continues a moment later, his voice sad and frustrated. “Flint can fuck around and get a pat on the back for pulling C’s in every class, but I get one fucking A- and he’s tearing apart my room and making a bonfire out of my posters? Why is nothing I do ever good enough? Why doesn’t—“ Alex cuts himself off abruptly, swallowing the emotion thick in his throat. “Why doesn’t he love me?”

An aching fury unlike anything Michael has ever known rises inside him; he wants to scream, wants to cry at the unjustness of Alex—the beautiful, wonderful boy who has shown him nothing but love and kindness as long as he’s known him—having a father capable of such cruelty that he would make him feel so unloved. Michael’s vision blurs with tears, but it’s not his pain that matters right now, so he bites his bottom lip harshly between his teeth to keep from crying out until he regains his composure enough to answer.

“Because he’s a psychopath who doesn’t even deserve to know you, Alex,” Michael says.

Alex sighs, but otherwise doesn’t react.

“How often does he do stuff like this?” Michael asks, fearing the answer.

“Often enough,” Alex says, and he’s vague enough that Michael gets the feeling this happens far more often than Alex has ever let on.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Michael asks, trying hard not to let it come out like an accusation. He’s relieved when Alex doesn’t take it as one.

“I don’t like thinking about him when I’m with you,” Alex answers.

“What about Liz and Maria? Do they know?”

“A little,” Alex says. “They walk on eggshells around me whenever I say anything, which is really fucking annoying, so I don’t tell them much anymore.”

“So you just deal with it all on your own?” Michael asks, rubbing his thumb against the back of Alex’s hand.

“Yeah,” Alex shrugs. “Always have, I guess. When it gets bad, I just go to the shed behind my house to be alone.”

“But not tonight,” Michael comments.

“No,” he says softly. “Not tonight.”

Michael lets that hang in the air between them for a moment before he asks, “What changed?”

“I, um…” he says, voice wavering. He sniffles when he pauses. “I just needed you, I guess.”

Michael’s chest clenches at Alex’s admission, and he presses a soft kiss to the back of Alex’s neck. He’s about to tell Alex how mutual that need is, but Alex starts to speak again.

“And I didn’t…” he says, his voice soft and hesitant like there’s something he needs to vocalize, but isn’t quite sure how.

“Didn’t what?” Michael prods gently.

“I didn’t feel safe there, with him still in the house,” Alex admits after a brief, pregnant pause and, fuck, Michael wants to cry again.

“You’re safe here,” Michael assures him, a desperate edge to his voice as he draws his arm tighter around him. “You’re safe with me. You’ll always be safe with me, Alex.”

Alex is quiet for a few seconds before Michael hears him sniffle. “I know,” he whispers. “But I’m not always here, am I?”

“You could be,” Michael insists, untangling his fingers from Alex’s to move his hand to his shoulder in an attempt to make him turn around. When he doesn’t budge, Michael slides his right thigh over Alex’s hips and lifts himself over him so he’s lying in the narrow space between Alex and the wall. Alex won’t quite meet his eyes, so he tips his chin up with a gentle touch. “I’m serious, Alex. Don’t go home. Stay here with me.”

It’s dark in his room, but Michael thinks he can make out a wistful expression on Alex’s face as he sighs. Michael waits for his answer with bated breath.

“I can’t do that,” he says finally, shaking his head. Michael tries to fight off the hurt his answer brings, but it’s easier said than done.

“Why not?” Michael asks.

“Because if he finds out where I am—and he will—he’ll hurt you, and I can’t—that’s not an option, no matter how bad things get,” Alex explains. “I can’t risk you like that, Michael. I won’t.”

“And, what, you think I can risk you? You just told me you don’t feel safe in your own home, Alex,” Michael says, his frustration growing. “Why won’t you let me protect you?”

“Because I love you,” Alex says, his voice breaking over the words, “and if he gets his hands on you, I will never forgive myself.”

They stare at each other for a long time, neither one of them willing to back down. Michael understands where Alex is coming from, he does, but the thought of him spending even a single minute somewhere he doesn’t feel safe makes Michael feel like he can’t breathe.

“What if we made a compromise?” Michael asks at last.

“What kind of compromise?” Alex asks warily.

“Forget the shed—you come here if it gets bad,” Michael proposes. “If anyone asks, you’re at Liz’s or Maria’s. You already do that when we’re together anyway, so it’s not like it’s unbelievable.”

Alex doesn’t look entirely convinced.

“I don’t know if—“ Alex starts, but the desperation curdling Michael’s stomach has him interrupting.

“Please, Alex,” Michael begs him. “Let me have this. I need to know you have an exit plan if you need one. I need you to feel safe.”

Alex studies his face as best he can in the dark for a long, terrifying moment.

“Okay,” Alex says at last and Michael feels such a strong rush of relief that he starts to tear up again.

“Thank you,” he says, and a few tears leak from his eyes as he captures Alex’s lips in a kiss. “Thank you.”

Instead of answering with words, Alex rakes his fingers through Michael’s curls and drags him in for another kiss, this one sweet and tender and everything Michael needs right now. It settles him more than he can say, makes him feel safe and warm and loved. He hopes his kisses make Alex feel the same way.

“What about your dad though?” Alex asks when he pulls away, distractedly twirling Michael’s hair between his fingers.

“What about him?” Michael asks.

“Will he be okay with me spending the night?”

“Yeah,” he answers with marginally more confidence than he really feels before he adds, “And, I mean, it’s not like you haven’t spent the night before.”

“Sneaking into your room every once in a while to fool around and then leaving before dawn is not the same thing as a sleepover and you know it, Michael Sanders,” Alex tells him, and he can’t quite see it but he’s sure Alex just rolled his eyes at him.

Michael sighs. He has a point.

“I’ll talk to him to make sure, okay?” Michael promises, reaching out to lay his hand on the side of Alex’s neck.

“Okay,” Alex relents.

Michael snuggles closer and leans in to kiss Alex’s forehead. Alex yawns sleepily as he pulls away and Michael laughs softly under his breath.

“Okay, time for bed,” Michael says, and Alex doesn’t fight him on it.

It takes a little maneuvering, but eventually Michael winds up on his back with Alex’s head resting on his chest and his fingers pressing into Michael’s bare skin where they’ve slid up under his shirt.

“Thank you,” Alex murmurs against his collarbone.

“For what?” Michael asks, dropping a kiss onto the top of Alex’s head.

“For being here,” he answers, like it’s a kindness he never expected, and Michael can’t help but kiss him again.

“I’ll always be here for you, Alex,” Michael tells him, feeling the truth of those words as he whispers them into Alex’s hair. “All you need to do is stay.”

#malex #malex fic #michael guerin #alex manes #Michael Sanders AU #my fic #Kinda rushed the ending #but I really wanted to finish this tonight so I hope you liked it!

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supergirl-writingz · 4 years ago

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Kidnapped Part 2

B!D deals with recovery.

Note: the doctor being named dr grey isnt actually like mer or lexie i literally just watch too much greys and couldnt think of another name haha also THANK U FOR BEING SO PATIENT W ME im really proud of this fic tbh and i hope u guys like it:) remember requests are always open

Warning: trauma, anxiety, therapy

It’s been about one week since you were rescued. You were doing okay. Everyone was trying to convince you to see someone, to talk about what you went through. You didn’t get why. You realized you have been through something tragic, but wouldn’t it be easier to just put it in the past?

Physically, you still had a long way to go. You were still cooped up at the DEO and you would be for a little bit longer. You had bruises everywhere, 2 broken ribs, a concussion, and a broken bone in your foot. But Lena assured you that you were healing properly. You trusted her.

Your least favorite part about everything, was the way people were treating you. They treated you as if you were glass, and if they spoke to loud or even held your hand, they would break you. You didn’t feel broken and you didn’t get why everyone wanted you to be. Lena was the only one who would tell you things how they were, straightforward with no holding back. You appreciated it.

Lena walked into the room, “Hey hun can we talk?”

You nodded, “Of course Lena what’s up?”

Lena sat at the edge of your bed, “Darling I think you need to see someone, you-”

“Not you too” you interrupted rolling your eyes, “I’m fine, I don’t need to see anyone”

Lena was patient with you, with a calm voice she said, “Y/N you can’t keep bottling up your emotions, it’s not healthy. If you don’t let this out you’re gonna have a breakdown. You’re not fine and thats okay.”

“I am fine” you snapped at her.

“Y/N, you are scared to sleep without sedatives and you haven’t talked about what happened to you at all. Let me help you, please talk to me, or Kara or Alex or a specialist. Please”

You turned your head away from her. You were embarrassed but it was true, you were scared of going to bed without them.

“Don’t sedate me tonight, I’ll sleep just fine”

Lena sighed, “Okay”

As she walked out she turned around and said, “You know we’re all just trying to do what’s best for you right?”

You didn’t answer. Lena walked out looking sad and defeated. You felt bad, she’s helped you so much. But you were tired of people saying you weren’t okay. You thought about sleeping tonight without the sedatives, truthfully you were nervous but you didn’t tell anyone. Tonight was Kara’s turn to sleep in your room, and she always made you feel safe.

Later that night, around 11, you finally fell asleep after tossing and turning for a couple hours.

All of the sudden you woke up with a start not knowing where you were. You were screaming and your heart rate was through the roof. Kara instantly got up and rushed to you.

“Y/N baby it’s just a dream! You’re okay!” she said calmly but loud enough so it would get through to you.

It didn’t help. You were starting to hyperventilate. Kara put her face directly in front of yours.

“Look at my sweetheart, breathe like I do” Kara said, breathing in and out slowly for me to follow.

You looked Kara in the eyes and started following her breathing. 5 minutes later you were breathing normally. Lena and Alex came rushing in, someone must have called them.

“Baby what happened?” Alex asked with a concerned tone.

Tears were building up in your eyes, “I- I was back there.. in my dream”.

“The room where it all happened?” Lena asked. You nodded, tears starting to come quicker

“It was so real, I could feel every punch, every kick. It was like I was back there.” you said, at this point you were sobbing.

Alex came close to you and put her hand to your cheek, “You’re safe now Y/N, he can’t hurt you anymore”

You pulled Alex closer and cried into the crook of her neck. While Kara was strong and comforting, there was something about Alex that made you feel powerful and in control. She was such a good directer at the DEO, even if things in her life were bad. Even when everything was going wrong, she had control. You needed that. You needed to be in control of your emotions, but you didn’t know how. You realized now everyone was right, you weren’t okay. But you still didn’t like the idea of seeing a therapist of any kind. You just couldn’t imagine talking to a complete stranger about things you can’t talk about to the people closest to you.

You started to calm down and stopped crying. You looked up at Lena.

“I’m so sorry Lena”, you said.

“Darling you have nothing to be sorry for” she replied softly.

“I was so rude to you, you were just trying to help” you replied guiltily.

“You’re struggling little one, whether you know it or not, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. After what you’ve been through, we’d be more concerned if you weren’t struggling” Kara said.

“We just want you to feel better and we want you to know you have our constant support” Alex said.

You looked down and smiled softly. You didn’t know what you would do without these people. You didn’t think therapy was for you, but it seems like it would make them feel better, and who knows maybe it would make you feel better too.

“I’ll see someone”, you said quietly, “if you guys really think it will be good”

Alex smiled and said, “We’re only asking that you try”.

You got in a couple more hours of sleep before day time had come and it was too bright to sleep. You heard a knock at the door and looked up to see Lena and another woman you didn’t recognize.

“Hey hun, this is Dr. Grey, she works with people who have been through trauma” Lena said, trying not to overwhelm you.

She smiled a bright smile and said, “Hi, it’s nice to meet you”

You took a breath and remembered how you told Lena and your sisters you would give it a try.

You reached out your hand and said “Hi, I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you too”

Dr. Grey shook your hand then told you that Lena or your sisters could stay in the room, or it could be just them. You decided to give it a try alone with Dr. Grey. Lena understood and wished you good luck before leaving. You took a deep breath, talking to this stranger was making you feel anxious. You and Dr. Grey started talking, and quickly you felt more comfortable. You guys didn’t talk much about the kidnapping, she mostly just wanted to know your home and social life. You told her pretty much everything, from your sisters, your friends, Lena, and school. Dr. Grey was pretty easy to talk to. The only time the kidnapping did come up was when she suggested that you talk to your sisters or Lena about what happened. She said if it was out in the open, you might feel better. She made it very clear though that you should wait until you were ready. And just like that, your hour session was over before you knew it.

“Thank you Dr. Grey” you said.

She smiled warmly, “So we’ll be meeting again?”

You returned her smile and nodded.

About 2 weeks later, you were sitting in your bed at the DEO. You have been seeing Dr. Grey daily and it was helping a lot. All of the sudden Kara walked in and you smiled at her asked her to bring Alex and Lena into the room. Kara smiled and nodded, walking out of the room to get them. A few moments later, the three women walked in.

“So Dr. Grey thought that I should talk to at least someone about what happened, other than her. And I trust you guys more than anyone, so I want to tell you guys” you say, starting to feel a little anxious.

“That’s very sweet darling but we don’t wanna push you into talking about something you’re not ready to talk about” Lena said concerned.

You smiled, “I’m ready”, and they nodded.

You told them everything, from you walking home from school, to the guy grabbing you, to your surroundings, and on and on. You told them how they wanted to know who Supergirl was, and you shot Kara a warm look almost saying, ‘This isn’t your fault’. Kara gave you a small yet guilty smile. You took a deep breath as you started to talk about the torture. Your hands were shaking so Alex grabbed them into hers. You didn’t even realize you were crying until Kara wiped a tear from your cheek. You told them everything... you told them the beatings, about the whips and taser. You told them about the hunger, and how cold it was. You told them how you were so hopped up on drugs, you couldn’t even remember how you got there.

“The scariest part was when I lost hope, I truly thought I was gonna die there” you said. You finally looked up at them, Kara was crying just as much as you were. Lena and Alex had some tears too, but you could tell they were trying to be strong. You grabbed Kara’s hands and looked her in the eyes.

“But you saved me Kara, you’re the reason I’m still here” you said softly.

Kara pulled you into a hug and you felt her warmth and comfort, which then turned into pain from your ribs.

“Kara.. too tight” you said chuckling.

“Sorry” she laughed immediately letting go. The four of you sat there in silence for a while, enjoying each others company. Dr. Grey was right, you did feel better putting it all out there.

A few weeks later, you were making great progress. You were still having nightmares, but not every night. The anxiety meds you were taking were starting to help with the panic attacks too. You were still at the DEO, but you were starting to walk around though, with a boot and crutches. Your ribs were almost healed and your concussion was all gone.

You were doing great with Dr. Grey too. The only thing she was concerned with was that you didn’t want to leave the DEO. Of course you wanted to be at home, but you couldn’t get yourself to step out of the building. You felt safe in there. You had this fear that the man who took you would be out there, even though you knew he was in custody. Everyone tried to get you just to go on a simple walk outside, but your anxiety would kick in before you even got the chance. Today was going to be different, today you were determined to go outside. You haven’t been outside since Kara flew you to the DEO the day of the kidnapping, and you were barely conscious.. but today was different.

You asked Kara, Alex, and Lena if you could all go on a walk. They gave a little surprised look but didn't say anything, they probably didn’t want you to overthink it, but they realized how big of a deal this was. You guys were having a normal conversation, walking through the DEO. You stopped when you reached the exit. You felt Kara give your hand a little squeeze, letting you know that it’s okay. You took a deep breath, opened the door, and walked outside.

You were surprised as you felt the fresh air in your lungs. Everything looked greener than you remember. You spent so much time in the DEO, that you forgot there was life outside of the grey and dark building. You looked around at all the people, talking and laughing, and you were amazed at how good it felt. You quickly started to cry and turned back to your sisters and Lena.

“Oh baby why are you crying?” Alex asked softly, “Do you wanna go back inside?”

These were happy tears.

“I’m finally free from him” you said smiling, wiping the tears from your face.

They all smiled at you and were so proud of your strength and perseverance. You had a lot to work through still, but this was a break through. This was the first time since the kidnapping, that you were 100% sure that you would make it through this. You pulled them into group hug, silently thanking them for never leaving your side.

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too-much-sunshine · 4 years ago

Text

Fangs for the Hospitality

Chapter 2

Summary: After Roman leaves his family reunion mad at Remus, his car breaks down. The huge snow storm forces him into the forest hes always been told to stay away from. Who will he meet? And why are they being so nice? Most importantly, why are his teeth so sharp?

A/N: My self-indulgent magic/vampire fic! Let me know if I need to tag something or you wanna be tagged!

Relationship: Familial DAM, Eventual Roceit, Eventual Intrulogical

Warnings (per chapter): Car trouble, Snow storm, very brief talk of death, anxiety, being cold, vague homophobia, Romans family are dicks, Remus too by accident, cursing, rumors, possible panic attack

Catch up!: Master list, Chapter 1

Word Count: 4547

Read on AO3!

Roman finally lifted his head off the wheel and looked around his car. He made sure to keep a few things in his car that would help him if he ever needed to stay the night in his car. While looking he heard a voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Remus called him a worry wart. He shook it off and continued looking around.

After a few minutes of searching for a blanket (he swore was in here somewhere), a loud bang rang out from the front of the car. Roman jumped so high he hit his head on the roof of his car.

“The fuck was that!?” He shouted, higher pitched than he's ever willing to admit. “Come oonnn woorrlld are you really going to make me check my engine now?” He pleaded to any god that would listen.

And almost as if they had heard him, smoke started to cloud from under the hood.

Roman yelped and jumped out of the car. Running to the front hood he placed the backside of his hand to the metal to find it blazing hot.

“How the FUCK does a car start on fire in the middle of a FUCKING SNOW STORM!?” He screamed. And then he screamed again just for the hell of it.

At this point Roman couldn't tell if he was crying or if it was just the melted snow running down his face. His hair was ruined, his suit probably was as well. His shoes were full of snow and it was only starting to snow harder as the moments passed.

Roman huffed another hitching breath as he started to look around. There was no way he could stay in his car tonight. With his luck today it might end with it blowing up in the middle of the night... well more later in the night. Though at this point he considered staying just for the possibility of it actually happening.

Looking around, there was no one anywhere. No houses, no lights, he hasn't even seen a person on this road since he left his old house. On one side of the road was a wide open field where he had pulled off too. The other side was a large, dense forest.

As a kid he was warned to stay away from these woods because many people have gotten lost in them. Remus once dared him to go in, to which Roman said no. Then Remus called him lame and ran away to play somewhere else. There were too many spooky stories for Romans liking. And with Roman overactive imagination he stayed far away from here.

Sure the adults told him that the reason told to stay away was because he could get lost. But Remy once told him that it was really because the forest was magic, and that there were witches, werewolves and vampires in there.

And that story was much more fun so that's what Roman chose to believe as a child.

Now Roman didn't really believe in those stories anymore. It was very much more likely that people just got lost in the forest to never be found again. It is a very big forest and is very thick.

Though at the moment Roman wasn't paying much attention to the forest beside him. The young man was not fit for this kind of weather and it was starting to get to him. He was getting very cold and the wind was not helping. He needed to find help soon. He'd call Remy or Remus but his phone was in his jacket pocket, which he forgot back at the house.

Sucking it up, he realized he would have to walk for a bit to find a house. Maybe they would be nice enough to let him use their phone. He picked the direction he had previously been driving toward, and started to walk. He pulled his arms in close to him and kept a quick pace.

It was very cold. The snow was not letting up and he didn't know how long he would have to be walking. Deciding the best strategy was to try and distract himself, Roman started to think of the creatures that might be in the woods.

‘Maybe,’ Roman thought, ‘There really are werewolves and they are actually really nice. Like what if I stumble upon one and they let me use their phone? Wait...would they even have phones? I don't know their life so maybe. What would I even say to them? Just be like ‘why hello my furry looking friend I seem to be in quite the pickle. Mayhaps you have a phone I could use?’ … No that stupid… They'd probably eat me before then… That's kinda judgmental huh. Maybe they should just eat me. It's not like if I were to actually meet them I could talk to them. I’d be too nervous like I always am with new people… How am I supposed to get home if I even ask for help? Ugg this is dumb…’

Roman kept thinking of random scenarios that might happen if he were to step into the woods. After walking for what felt like an hour, but could have been anywhere from 20 minutes to 3 hours, Roman was freezing cold and shivering violently. The storm was still really bad, but it seemed that the worst had passed.

It also seemed Romans luck was turning around. Roman had spotted a light coming from deep in the forest. It was the only type of man-made thing he had seen in ages so he had no other choice but to step past the threshold, into the thick forest. Before he stepped in he paused and looked in the woods.

He was so cold, and he knew that if he didn't get help soon he was going to freeze.

‘Well,’ He thought, ‘If I die from this, at least it I finally do something cool…’

And with that he stepped into the forest. It was a hard walk. There was no straight path, which distantly Roman thought was odd.

Finally after walking passed a few more trees he emerged on to a great expanse of flat, white snow. Past the flat area, which he realized was a lawn, was an older victorian style house. Much smaller than the mansion Roman grew up in, but much too big to be lining for one person.

Without thinking much, since he couldn't feel his arms or legs anymore, he quickly hobbled up to the door and gave three, light raps.

Roman stood in front of the door, arms around himself barely staying up right. His hair matted down from the snow melting into his hair. But the temperature must have gone up a bit because the snow was starting to turn into a bit of rain.

Roman vaguely realized that the walk through the woods was a lot harsher then he realized. His bowtie was missing and his shirt was barely tucked in anymore. He was a mess. This would never be acceptable dress to meet someone in. He started to shiver more, but possibly for a different reason.

Roman realized that he was still standing on some random porch, in the literal freezing cold and nobody had answered. After a good five minutes more wait, Roman knocked again, but this time he mustered up the rest of his strength and knocked louder. He the went back to waiting. The edges of his vision were going fizzy around the edges. He wished they would open the door and at least tell him to leave rather than make him wait.

Finally, after Roman was just about to walk back into the woods, the door creaked slowly open.

~~~

“Roman! Remus! My boys you made it here safe and sound! Come in come in!” She ushered the boys who were previously shuffling in the doorway trying to keep out of starting the softly falling snow. “How have you both been? I’ve haven't heard from you both in a while.” Though the question was posed at them both, her focus was directed at Remus, even helping him out of his coat. Roman took his coat off himself and draped it on the rack next to Remus’.

“Fantastic as always!. Had a patient the other day, she had quadruplets! All natural it was crazy to see how big she was, and how many babies were in there. All of them delivered with no complications. Three boys and one girl!” Remus responded walking next to his mom talking animatedly.

“Oh that's just wonderful sweetie! I bet all of them were cute as buttons! That poor mother though, four babies. That will be a handful! And that poor baby girl, growing up with three brothers! You know-”

Roman tuned out their conversation as they walked past the kitchen and staircase. The ballroom was down the straight hall from the greeting room to the left. It took about 5 minutes to actually walk there though.

This place was too big in Romans opinion. Even as a young boy he thought this place was too big. Too much much space to fill, though Remus never seemed to have trouble filling it all up for the both of them. Roman preferred reading, writing, or drawing compared to Remus’ brand of destructive entertainment.

Occasionally Remus and Roman would come together and put on small plays for their mother, father, and staff if they were around at the time. Their mother was never super interested but their father always thought it was the best show he has ever seen. Always praising them both for their hard work.

Sometimes, when Remus was out making a mess and Roman was sat drawing, his father would come in and sit with him. Sometimes watching him draw or quietly reading. Roman enjoyed the shared silence, which he was told was quite odd for a child.

Often when Roman was feeling upset or scared he would run to his dad and just ask him to read to him. Which he always gladly did. He would hold Roman close and just read from whatever was closest. This was actually how Roman found he loved plays. His dad and him might read together sometimes and trade off lines, trying to see who could make the other laugh first. Roman wasn't typically the winner of this game either, but he found he never would mind

Even years later, long after their dad disappeared without so much as a note, Roman looked back at those memories very fondly. He hasn't changed much since he was young. Not talking unless he had something to share. Most called him quite, but he wasn't always. It just took a reason to get him to speak up, and he often found there wasn't much that could do so.

Soon enough Roman was pulled from his memories as they made it to the ballroom where it seems that they were the last to arrive. Most of the immediate and extended family was here, mingling around in their too fancy outfits. If Roman were to guess he would say there was a single item of apparel here that wasn't at least $100, including jewelry. Roman couldn't say much though since he too was wearing a suit. Though he left the jacket at the door and he chose a bowtie over a regular tie.

Nobody made to look their way, except for a few glances. Most were already in the middle of conversation or were looking for someone else that wasn't him. This made it easy for him to be able to slip right past his mother and brother who were still in animated conversation.

Roman made a look around the room to determine the people and, by association, places to avoid. Making a quick glance around the lavish gold gilded room, Roman saw many familiar faces. In the most left corner near the seating area was his grandmother; Gramma Ann. She was a nice woman if you can get past her severely outdated societal norms. Roman had learned more than once that it's best to not talk to her unless he wanted a lesson on proper edicate and questions about his supposedly straight love life.

(It's not that his family didn't know he wasn't straight (they were quite aware after he was caught in the broom closet with the cook's son when he was 16.) It's more like they were hoping he would “change his mind.” Almost like if they never addressed it, it would just go away and he would be “normal.” Or as close to normal as he can be with the way he is.)

That brings him to who is at the centre of the room. His Uncle Dave was probably the person he wanted to avoid the most. He never was really nice to Roman, nor to Remus. For the longest time Roman assumed he just didn't like kids. But even as he grew Uncle Dave still seemed to hate them. It all came to a head when his brother, Romans dad, left without a trace. He used to live with Romans family during the time when he disappeared. For some reason he blamed Roman for it, something that he never fought back on. How did he know that he wasn't? So Roman just took his yelling. Took his screaming about how Roman is the reason because of all of his problems. How he was just too weird and quiet and terrible, and that's why he left.

Roman quickly averted his eyes to the loud laughter that came from his right. By the looks of it Remus had finally dispelled his conversation with their mother and found Remy. He looked the same as he always has; wearing those dark sunglasses inside, and dressed in all black. He said it was to look cool but Remy had told Remus and him one night (After they had heard Remy being yelled at) that he actually wears dark things because he's sensitive to light. He gets migraines from it. They had been sure to keep the lights down around him after that.

(All three boys were proof that having any sort of illness in the family was very much so not appreciated. It meant that the family was not perfect, which was not an option to most.)

The official gossip session has seemed to have started if the amused cackle from Remus meant anything. Soon enough those two would break away and try and cause as much trouble as they can.

Roman kept scanning the crowd for any problem areas and after spotting a few aunts and cousins to avoid, he seemed to find the perfect corner to remain in for as long as possible. Luckily there were a few chairs there as well and they were empty. The only problem was going to be making it there.

Directly in front of it was a small circle consisting of his grandfather on his mothers side, and anyone trying to please him. This grandfather was the reason these parties were as fancy as they were. He paid for everything including the house, though the suit he was wearing was probably worth more than most of the furniture in it. He was a very wealthy CEO of the steel company that he founded when he was 19. He lavished his daughter, Romans mom, in as much of the money as he could. She was his only daughter after all.

He, too, seemed to hate Roman. But then again he also hated Romans dad so it may just be left over hate from their relationship.

He was never as generous with his money to him and Remus as he was with most of the rest of the family. Roman didn't mind much. He has everything he needs, even if his job makes him a bit tight on money sometimes.

A job his grandfather very much so did not like one bit. To be honest it seemed like Roman was the only one who liked his job. Even Remus seemed a bit apprehensive when Roman had brought it up. But it was one of the only things Roman never budged on.

Roman was a writer, stagehand, and sometimes director at a pretty large community theatre in the area. It paid well, but not consistently since it was only a job during shows. Of which there was 4-5 a year. He loved his job, but none of his family seemed to share that mentality.

Roman hoped that if he just kept his head down his grandfather just won't recognize him. Just walk right past him and he will never know. He wouldn't see Roman and he'd be able to stay the rest of this night in the corner. Roman dropped his gaze and started walking at a quick pace. It was a good plan, if one of his aunts had not already had too much to drink.

On his way over to his sacred corner, someone stumbled right into his side pushing him along with her. Roman knew he was in a bit of trouble as he looked up and saw who he bumped into.

Roman immediately started to apologize.

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry grandpa I-”

“Don't call me that you clumsy brat.” He grumbled interrupting Roman.

“Right...Well sorry either way. Didn't see you there! How have you been? Hows the company?” Roman did want to get out of the situation, but he was nothing if not polite. Too bad the same can't be said for most of the people here. He knew he should just shut up and leave, but he could feel the familiar numb spread of anxiety spreading through his limbs.

“As if you really care. But if you must know, well. Stocks are going down a bit because of those damn foreign factories. If it was up to me, we would take them all out by any means necessary. This is the best country anyway. Not like the world would be missing much.” He declared to the crowd who all laughed and agreed. All except Roman who slowly stepped back from the group. His grandpa seemed to have hit a stride and kept up with his racist speech as Roman continued to back up.

Once he was far enough away he turned and hightailed it to his empty corner, breathing a sigh of relief.

‘Finally,’ Roman thought to himself. ‘Now I can be alone.’

“Hey Roman!” A voice all but yelled into his ear.

Roman would never admit how he jumped about a foot in the air and he spun quickly around. He fully turned to see Remus almost on the floor laughing next to Remy who was at least trying to pretend he wasn't laughing.

“Oh ha ha Remus good job you got me?” Roman deadpaned.

“Oh come on that was so good! You always jump so high when you get scared!” Remus laughed some more wiping a tear from his eye.

“Are you done yet?” Roman said hotly.

“Come on babes let him laugh it up for a while. He's gonna need it after losing so bad to me for another year. What has it been now? Like a 7 year streak?” Remy sarcastically replied.

“Uh, bitch, I don't think so! This year I came prepared!”

“Rems you say that every year.”

“Maybe so but I mean it this year! Watch!” Remus ran off into the crowd laughing. He made a direct beeline for their mother leaving Remy and Roman in the corner together.

“...so...Do you think he actually has a chance this year?” Roman asked Remy, finally sitting in one of the two chairs in the corner.

“Babe, I don't think he even has a good rumor. He's just jelly from all the wins I’ve got.” Remy sighed and sat in the other chair next to Roman.

“I don't know he seemed to think he had a really good one this year.”

“Honey, he thinks he has a good one every year. Last year had to be the worst though. At this point I don’t see why anyone would listen to him, let alone believe a word he says.”

“Well as long as hes having fun here.”

“Well babe you could get in on this too if you want.” Remy lifted his sunglasses a bit to look over Roman.

“Know full well Remington that I can't talk to people let alone tell a convincing lie.”

“Yea yea we've been over it. Social Anxiety is a bitch huh… Well If you need anything you can at least talk to me. I get the struggle in this family.” Remy looked pointedly into Romans eyes.

“Aww does Remy liikkee mmeeeee???” Roman didn't much like the change in tone of the conversion, so he tried to change it back to the light heartedness as it was before.

“Bitch? I would never.” Remy smirked and replaced his sunglasses.

“Yea yea. You know-” Roman started, before a shrill voice cut him off.

“ROMAN ADRIAN JULIUS PRINCE!” A voice pierced through the crowd.

Roman immediately stood up at attention as the crowd parted revealing his mother storming past everyone straight to him. Roman didn't know what he had done wrong this time. But he did know he was kinda upset he didn't even make it halfway through the night yet. Remy stood up, and stood slightly behind him.

“Babes, what did you do?” He whispered.

“I have to clue.” He whispered back, just as his mother stopped right in front of him.

To Romans surprise she did yell at him or push him back right away. She just stood there searching his face. After a tense moment, she seemed to find what she was apparently looking for in his anxious expression, as she broke out into a bright smile. Roman was reeling from such a contrast of emotions going on around him and his own. If her smile wasn't weird enough, she started laughing then wrapped her arms around Roman.

Roman froze. His mother hasn't hugged him since he was very young. He started at the now staring, silent crowd. Slowly he returned the hug, moreso because it was to be expected. Finally she pulled back, but held him at arm's length, hands on his shoulders. Roman found she had tears in her eyes. He's never been more confused in his entire life.

“M-mom what's going on?” He shakily started.

“Roman! Don’t pretend like you don't know! Why didn't you tell you were engaged!” She shouted. The crowd gasped. While Roman took a second to process what she just said.

“I-...I’m not though?” He spoke stuntingly.

“Don't worry honey you don't have to hide it anymore! I know you were worried to tell us because of that one thing that happened...But i'm just glad you finally found what's actually right! You should have brought her with you honey!”

Roman didn't know how to react. She was just so happy with this idea… Should he tell her? Tell her he has absolutely no club what the hell she was talking about? Well...If she wanted him to be engaged...why not let this slide for now…? It's not like she will ever meet anyone he dates anyway. Why not entertain her love for a while.

With his mind made up he finally spoke up.

“W-who told you?”

“So it is true! You didn't deny it! Oh sweetie, I'm so proud of you! Who knew you’d finally do something like this before Remus!”

“Mom.” Roman was starting to feel really small in this very large crowd around him, realizing everyone was still staring. “Who told you this?”

“Why Remus of course! I’m not surprised you told him first, a little disappointed is all but still!”

“Umm. Thank you. You- Umm. Now if you'll excuse me I need to...get a drink!”

“Oh that's perfect! A toast! Everyone grab a drink for my son and his engagement!” She turned to say to everyone.

Roman was starting to breathe a bit faster. He caught his grandfather's eye. He seemed to have done almost a full 180 from how he looked at him before. He had a slight smirk on his face and what seemed to be a bit of proud gleam in his eye. Roman felt a bit sick. Remy disappeared from behind him, probably to get a drink as well.

Maybe he shouldn't have gone along with this idea. Once he found out Remus was involved he knew exactly what was happening. He just wishes he had come up with a less believable lie this year. He should have known once he agreed everyone would be too happy. This was a family of tradition, and to them marrying young was very important. They are probably the most proud of Roman right now then they ever have been or will be.

Someone handed Roman a glass of champagne but he didn't feel it much. His family was cheering for him and they were actually...happy for him. He didn't want this. Not like this. He needed to get out. He needed to run before he started to panic even more. They were happy for him...he didn't want to ruin that by actually being himself.

So he ran.

He ran past his mother. Passed his drunk aunt and uncle who were cheering for him and drinking even more. Right passed his proud looking grandfather. And then right past Remus and Remy who was passing Remus his well earned cash. As Roman passed them he shot Remus a cold glare. Remus went from a gleeful smile holding a new $50 bill, to fear as he watched Roman leave the ballroom.

Once he was out of the room where everyone was watching him, he kept going. He ran past the staircase Remus fell down when he was 7, and he father and him sat on to read Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. Past the kitchen where Remus stole the cooks still hot cookies, where Roman sat with his father when he taught him how to use chopsticks. And finally out the door, completely forgetting his jacket.

Once outside the cold shocked him into a bit more lucidity. The storm is almost in full force now. Whipping winds and heavy snow. But Roman didn't care. He kept running all the way to his car, which was easy to find since it was the most beat up thing in the lot. He was surprised it even got him and Remus all the way out to the countryside without breaking down.

Roman jumped in the front seat and quickly reached for the key in his pocket. Once he finally grabbed it, he started the car as quickly. He distantly felt bad for booking it as soon as everyone started looking at him, but he just handled it. He could still barely breathe.

He backed his car up and round. Finally he was driving away from the mansion, while pulling his seatbelt on at the same time. Looking in the rearview mirror he caught Remus busting through the front door into the snow, just in time to see Roman turn the corner and out of sight.

~~~

Next Chapter!

Taglist:

@primaveradoodles

#sanders sides #ts roman sanders #ts roman #ts remus sanders #ts remus #car trouble #remy sanders #bad family #bad family relations #panic attack #snow storm #magic au #vampire au #verys fic

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nike-shawn · 4 years ago

Text

Vampire Shawn, Part One

Happy Halloween loves! Part two coming soon.... send me any ideas or comments you have for the series!! 🎃🎃

“Hey. Do you need someone to walk you home?”

His eyes are kind. They remind you of your dog’s eyes a little; innocent yet slightly mischievous. You smile to yourself— comparing a handsome boy’s eyes to your dogs’ probably means you’ve had too much to drink.

“I’m fine, actually. Thanks though,” you tell him, handing him your now empty solo cup. “If you could toss that into the trash can behind you, that’d be great.”

He looks slightly confused but takes the cup anyways and quickly deposits it in the large plastic garbage bin that somehow belongs perfectly fine in this dump of a frat house. There are cigarette butts and crushed beer cans underneath each of your steps as you make your way back to your friends in the kitchen.

“Um,” you hear him start again, and you wonder how he caught up to you so fast. “I was just asking because I noticed that the guy you were talking to earlier left with my friend.” You turn to face him. His kind eyes look a little sad now. “He shouted something at you but I don’t think you noticed. Something about ubering?”

“Fuck,” you mutter. It’s not entirely unlike Freddie to leave without you. In fact, it’s starting to become the norm.

“So, like I said, I can walk you home. I got left behind too so…” he drifts off, shrugging.

You look at him for only a few moments before deciding that, yeah, this kid looks trustworthy enough. The alcohol flowing through you is starting to make your eyelids feel heavy and if Freddie is already gone then there’s nothing else for you here. The booze is gone, the house is getting too crowded to move easily, and you’re bored.

“Sure.”

He smiles and you can’t help but return it with one of your own. He nods and leads you out of the party, one gentle hand on your wrist.

You break out into the front lawn of the house and you finally feel like you can breathe properly without the humid, stinking air of the fraternity. The boy looks over at you happily as you dramatically sigh and say “40 degrees never felt so nice”.

“You more of a cold-weather person?”

“Yeah. Love when the leaves change and the snow comes. Best part of the year.”

“I’m a winter person too,” he replies, and you hum a response as you remember how cold his fingers were on your wrist earlier.

You’re a few steps in front of him as you rattle off the directions to your apartment. The two of you start to talk about the guy who was screaming the lyrics to Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus when he suddenly stops. You don’t recognize that he isn’t right beside you anymore until he says “wait just a second.”

He takes a step off of the sidewalk and into the grass. Fall leaves crunch underneath his shoes as he peeks into the dense wall of trees right ahead of him. You shift nervously from one foot to the other. “Is something wrong?”

“Do you hear that?” He asks, looking back at you for a moment with an inquisitive look. “Sounds like an animal is hurt.”

You don’t wanna sound like an asshole, but part of you wants to say F it to whatever animal is in there and just get along with your walk. It’s getting chillier and chillier and all you have on is your stupid, skimpy nurses costume. “Is this some Halloween prank?” You ask. “Because it’s not very funny.”

“No, no,” he says. “C’mere. Can you hear that?”

You step forward a bit but are still a ways behind him. You strain your ear to try and hear what he’s hearing.

“I can’t hear anything.”

“Oh,” he says, taking a step back. There’s a shift in his attitude. If you weren’t so drunk maybe you would’ve noticed that he’s suddenly impatient, walking quickly ahead of you.

You are almost out of breath when you see your apartment complex come into view. The boy hasn’t said anything since he stopped to check on the animal. “Um, hey,” you start, “it was really nice of you to walk me back but I’ve got it from here.”

His energy shifts yet again, now back to his happy-go-lucky frat boy persona. He flashes a brilliant smile and starts to undo his flannel. You realize that he went as some kind of lumber jack for Halloween as your gaze follows from where his fingers are loosening a button all the way to his large, tan work boots. “If you won’t let me walk you back, at least let me give you this. You’re shivering.” He hands you his flannel, smile still stretched wide across his pretty features. You absentmindedly wonder why he didn’t offer it earlier but take it anyways, grateful for the extra warmth.

“Thanks,” you say, draping it around your shoulders. He reaches forward and starts to do up the buttons for you. You feel a strong pull towards his body, like you could just melt right into him. Once he has the last one done, the one right at your neck, you two share a laugh and he starts to step backwards, beginning his walk back to wherever he lives. “Nice meeting you!”

“You too,” he replies.

You scramble to find a suitable goodbye, but he’s already walking quickly away from you. You stammer out, “wait, I never got your name!”

He looks over his shoulder, lips quirked up at the ends. “My name’s Shawn.”

And then the night swallows him up.

🖤🖤🖤🖤

Weeks pass and you forget about Shawn. You scold Freddie for leaving you at the party but you aren’t really mad. Although Shawn was slightly odd, nothing happened. There was nothing memorable about the walk back, really, besides that scene with the wounded animal that you couldn’t hear. But you chalk that up to him just being a sympathetic drunk— it’s not a bad thing to want to help another living thing.

You come home from class one day and sling your backpack down on the floor as you flop onto the couch. Your roommates are all gone this weekend visiting family since you have a few days off in the beginning of next week, giving you a whole 4 days to yourself. You sigh happily and turn on a movie.

Rain is pounding on the roof and you’re almost asleep when someone knocks on the door. You’re startled awake by the noise. Quickly, you smooth down your hair with your palms and straighten your shirt before opening the door to reveal…

“Shawn?”

He smiles that signature smile. “Hey. I was just wondering if you had that flannel from a while ago? I have an event and we’re all supposed to wear one.”

You’re taken aback by the surprise, but you hurry to accommodate him since you have had the flannel way too long. You just didn’t know how to find him again. After a quick chat with Freddie you knew that he was a frat brother, but you weren’t going to trek all the way over there just to drop off a shirt. So you say, “yeah of course. Let me just go grab it.”

“Am I allowed to come in?” He asks.

“Oh, yeah! Yes, of course.”

It seems to take him an unnecessary amount of time to actually step into your apartment, but once he does you rush off to grab the flannel that you’re sure has just been bunched up in your closet somewhere.

When you return, he’s still standing by the door. You hand him the shirt and let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. “There ya go. Sorry it took me so long to get it back to you.”

“No worries,” he assures.

You assume this is the part where he leaves, but he stays put. You rock back awkwardly on your heels.

Suddenly his eyes take on a concerned look. He takes a few steps forward with his hands outstretched, almost like he’s about to catch you. “Woah, are you feeling okay?”

You feel completely fine, though as soon as his hand makes contact with your shoulder you feel heavy and leaden, your eyes already drooping.

You feel only a small pinch before you fall asleep.

🖤🖤🖤🖤

When you wake up, you’re back on your couch, but this time you’re laying horizontally across the cushions with an ice pack on your forehead. You can faintly hear Shawn’s voice coming from the kitchen.

“I don’t know, I don’t know,” you think you hear him saying. “I don’t know what to do.”

You try to sit up but when you do, all the blood rushes from your head and you start to feel dizzy.

“I can’t just do that. She’ll never go for that.”

You try to tune him out. You remember passing out and start to comb through the reasons why you would suddenly lose consciousness. You were nervous, that’s for sure, but you’ve never passed out from that. You haven’t had water in a while. Maybe that’s what it was.

Shawn must’ve ended his phone conversation because he comes into the living room and immediately sits on the floor beside the couch, leaning back on his palms casually. He takes a deep breath. “So,” he starts, “I need to tell you something.”

“I know I passed out.”

He laughs a little, though you can tell he didn’t think it was funny. His face has taken on a worried undertone and he keeps running his hand through his now tousled curls.

At his sudden nervousness, you feel a bloom of your own anxiety crawl up your throat. “What is it?” You ask quietly.

“Have you ever read Twilight?”

The severity of the situation contrasted with the stupidity of his question makes you laugh. “I watched the movies,” you tell him.

“You know how he’s like, all pale and stuff? And he is just really fuckin’ weird?”

You laugh again. “Sure.”

“Real vampires aren’t really like that.”

The smile starts to fall from your face. This doesn’t sound like a joke. “Shawn, what are you even talking about?”

He clears his throat, now moving so he’s a bit further away, leaning his back against the bottom of your lounge chair. “I’m being completely serious when I say this, OK?”

“Okay.”

“I’m a vampire.”

You fight to keep a straight face. A mix of disbelief and anger is starting to show on your features— your eyebrows start to shift towards the middle of your face and your jaw falls open a bit. You want to laugh but you also kinda want to cry. “What?”

“I wouldn’t have told you but, uh,” he pauses, clearing his throat, “something came up when I bit you.”

“You… bit me?”

He clears his throat again, a nervous tick. “So, there’s something that happens when a vampire is… hungry… Um, and basically I can make you fall asleep just by touching you and when you wake up you don’t remember the bite itself. But, yeah. So, when you fell asleep I bit you. You can probably still feel it.”

You don’t move. Shawn blinks at you a few times, then takes your hand gently and leads it to the junction of your neck and shoulder where there is unmistakable soreness. You don’t stop looking at him, in shock.

“Anyways,” he continues, “does that make sense?”

You look down to where the flannel hung over a chair by the door. It’s snowing now. It shouldn’t be snowing, you idly think. It’s only November 1st.

“Y/N?”

You jolt back to life. “How do you know my name?”

Shawn looks surprised at the question. Of course, there are many other questions you could’ve asked, but this is the one that popped into your head at a time where there is little you can make sense of. He runs a hand through his hair. He says, “I did a little research.”

“How?”

“I put in your address on the auditor’s website.”

Well. That makes sense. Part of you was expecting some kind of magic spell he cast to find out this information.

Shawn stands and offers you his hand. You look at it and blink. He says, “can I show you something?”

You nod and take his hand. You should probably run or ask Shawn if he’s on hard drugs but you don’t. You let him keep your hand in his as he leads you to the bathroom.

As soon as the two of you step in the mirror, you see them. Two puncture wounds, identically shaped and on a backdrop of a dark blue-ish bruise. You gasp out loud, your hands immediately drifting to the spot. You knew that it was sore from when Shawn drew your attention to it earlier, but you didn’t know that it would look like this. This is a bite. An unmistakable bite from someone with two long incisors and a thirst for blood.

And if Shawn’s telling you he’s a vampire, you’re having a hard time refuting it now.

Part Two

#Shawn Mendes imagines #vampire shawn #paranormal shawn #fics

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mostly-vo1d · 4 years ago

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Answer the questions and tag 10 people!

I've been tagged by @seven-oomen thank you!!

1. When and why did you start watching Teen Wolf?

I started watching a couple months after the finale came out, but I've been stalking the adhd Stiles tag on ao3 for like half a year or so before that. Which is also the reason I hyperfixated on it so xD

2. Who��s your favorite character? Are you like this character in any way?

Stiles, duh.

Kind of? My adhd/anxiety mirrors his pretty closely.

3. What’s your favorite season?

S5, probably. It'd be a tie with it, s1, and 3b, but when it comes to re-watch-ability, concept, characters/relationships, and fanon sandbox, it's probably s5.

4. Is there a scene that is really emotional for you?

Have you met me? I will literally cry at everything.

But the last scene that made me cry was either the hospital roof flashback of 5a, or the you're my brother speech from motel California. Those may or may not be connected.

Also, literally every Derek Chris scene that doesn't involve Chris threatening washing Derek window.

Also Chris' we hunt those who hunt us in s4? @ writers, contact me, I just wanna talk.

5. Who’s your favorite villain?

That depends entirely on how you define favorite.

Peter I like as a character, because he's an asshole, but he's incredibly fun/tragic to watch. And he's fun to play with in fanon.

The nogitsune when it comes to concepts, and the pack's reaction to it.

Kate if by favorite you mean she's one of the 5 villains I actively despise with every fiber of my being, but she's integral for a lot of other characters' arc.

6. What’s your favorite canon/fanon romantic relationship?

Canon: draeden

Fanon: it's a tie between stallison, Steo and petopher

7. What’s your favorite canon/fanon platonic relationship?

Canon: Allison and Chris, because their entire relationship just Breaks Me

Fanon: usually it's Stallison but I'm in a superwolf mood, so Allison and Clair Novak, just for some Bonding

8. If you could have one thing in canon that’s not ship related, what would it be?

Canon arcs proportionally to the worldbuilding

The early seasons did this really well, the spn world was only really as big as canon needed it to be, so both the story and the lore™ only revolved around the Hale/Argent/alpha pack conflicts.

But then we get kitsunes, a larger hunting community, another pack, and a lot of it falls flat because we only ever get the information that's relevant to the plot.

9. If you could have one thing in canon that is ship related, what would it be?

A flashback episode of teen petopher during that s4 scene, and them actually interacting before that. Canon petopher for me only works when they don't get back together, but having them show that history would have been great. Or painful. Both? Both.

10. Tell us something positive about Teen Wolf!

Every single person I've met through it is absolutely amazing and I love all of you. 💜

And it's just such a fun/angsty sandbox to play in

Now to tag 10 victims friends!!

Now, Ben also conveniently tagged most of the people I know so feel tagged from me too, and also @auriette @purplepints @missallisonargent @ailurophilia72 if you want to

#teen wolf #Tag game

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spirithunterscenarios · 5 years ago

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Death Mark & Crying Reader:

This is one of those personal projects that I had going on because my anxiety has been through the roof as of late and I'm a crybaby when my anxiety gets to me.

So, this is kind of a character x reader thing.

Yashiki Kazuo:

Seeing you panicking kind of makes him feel panicked, but he pulls himself together.

If you're fine with being touched, he's quick to hold you and rub circles in your back and remind you to breathe.

Breathe, just breathe. Count with him.

Wipes your tears or offers a tissue. He always seems to have a pocket pack on him.

If you need to talk about it, he's more than happy to listen to you. He's always got time and he may have some comforting advice. May be a little hurt if you don't want to talk about it, but he'll let it be. He can't judge.

Touches foreheads with you before kissing your cheek and reminding you he loves you.

Satoru Mashita:

He... isn't good at this, but he tries.

He's the type to ask what you need. It may seem strange, but he knows things could get worse if he assumes.

If it's anxiety, it may come as a surprise, but he knows the 5-4-3-2-1 method.

Like Yashiki, he'll listen to you talk if you want to. He just may not have as much advice as he does though.

Probably lightly pats your head before he takes your hand. This man needs help.

Shuuji Daimon:

Surprisingly good at this, he's used to patients crying, panicking or even going into shock.

He knows multiple methods to help calm someone. Breathing techniques, the 5-4-3-2-1 method, asking you to go through a times table or describe something around you, etc...

He's no counselor but his advice can be sound if you'd like it.

If you don't then that's fine, too.

You can talk about what has you upset or not, he understand if you don't want to speak up. He's patient.

Don't mind him if he holds your hand for a while though.

Shou Nagashima:

He's struggling, but he's trying! He promises!

If you can talk, he'll try that first. He'll probably have a hand on your shoulder or maybe your hand to remind you that he's there but otherwise he doesn't want to be too far into your space.

May even try to give you a piece of bubblegum and ask you to try and blow him a bubble. Maybe get your mind on something else?

May tell you a corny joke or two. Tell you about a cute animal he helped find a home for.

Deflects anything awful you say about yourself with something else.

He's fine if you don't want to talk because he doesn't want to see you cry again, but he does kiss your forehead and remind you that you mean a lot to him.

Ai Kashiwagi:

Hugs, all hugs! If you don't want it, she has your hand in hers the whole time unless you're super against contact.

Reminds you of all the reasons she thinks you're great.

Positive self-talk, she's going to make you say something nice about yourself, too.

Gently deflects every negative little thought you may have.

You want a snack? You look exhausted, so she insists on a break of some form. Crying is hard work!

Madoka Hiroo:

Not the best at this, but she makes an effort.

Breathing techniques are kind of really basic, but please count with her. She's actually really worried for you

If there's a vending machine nearby, she's probably going to insist on getting you a drink. It might lessen the possibility of you getting a headache or feeling tired afterwards.

Holds your hand if you want. She just really wants you to be okay and she's just... Kind of awkward about this.

She loves you and she really hopes you know this.

Christie Arimura:

Very motherly in a way, her voice is soft when she tries to calm you down.

She hushes you if you say something bad about yourself.

For the most part, she just lets you cry it out before she tries to say anything.

Reminds you how much she loves and cares about you with hugs and small kisses here and there.

Eita Nakamatsu:

He's honestly probably crying a little too just seeing you upset, but he does his best!

King of Distractions here, honestly.

Usually he has snacks on him to share with Suzu so he shares with you. Suzu is your friend, too, so she won't be mad.

Cute animal pictures or cool pics of idols.

Wanna listen to a song? He brought a CD player with one of his favorite band albums.

Reminds you that you mean a lot to him and he loves to see you smile.

#death mark #yashiki kazuo #satoru mashita #ai kashiwagi #shou nagashima #shuuji daimon #madoka hiroo #christie arimura #eita nakamatsu

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okaybutlikeimagine · 5 years ago

Note

What about Billy not used to being in a safe environment so whenever Hop starts getting frustrated Billy sort of just... shows up ready to get hit. And it doesn’t really register to Hopper that it’s happening until Billy just snaps at him one day that he can take it, but can’t handle the waiting game for the hit to finally come.

I’m gonna start sobbing don’t dO THIS except please do bc i love breaking my own heart and then mending it back together ♥ ♥ ♥

It takes Billy a long long long time to get comfortable in Hop’s cabin and one of the biggest reasons is that Hop does his very hardest to make Billy comfortable. Hop doesn’t give Billy any reason to fear coming home. Hop is aware of what happened in Billy’s past and tries to understand the horrors of what he went through but he learns more and more every day and every day he tries harder and harder to be more patient, more constructive, more understanding. And it’s sweet, it’s so fucking sweet, but Billy just doesn’t understand it and so he waits. He waits for it to get bad and he expects it and he really hurts his heart by doing it but he just can’t help it.

And not to get too personal, but I know a lot of the people who talk about Billy also talk about their own abuse that they’ve been through, so i’m gonna join in here. And while i’ve never been physically abused, i’ve been emotionally abused basically my whole life and was very heavily emotionally and mentally abused for a couple of years and let me tell you: the waiting was the worst fucking part for me. My abuser went from treating me horribly for about 2 weeks at a time to then pretending like everything was perfectly fine for a day or two. And that went on for 2 years. And the absolute worst part for me was the waiting. The days when things seemed to get better but you just know in your heart it’s going to get bad again. They’re going to hate you again for seemingly no reason and they’ll refuse to give you a reason and every day that it’s “better” is a reminder that it’s going to feel that much worse when it inevitably gets bad again and wow that fucking sucks. To the point where you start to wish it would just stay bad forever bc that’s better than being tricked into a false sense of security.

And that’s what I think Billy would feel when moving in with Hopper. Every day that it’s good is a reminder of everything that was bad and it all feels like a horrible trick is being played. And at first Billy is real reserved and calm and kind of emotionless when he’s at Hop’s cabin bc he’s not trying to stir the pot, he’s just trying to sleep under a roof and that’s basically it. It’s not until he actually gets adopted and moves in that he starts to wait for it. Like, really wait for it. Like, when he gets home from school some days he’ll sit on the couch for hours with the TV on in front of him and a blank stare on his face, not seeing a damn thing just sitting there picturing everything going to hell. Sitting there and waiting for Hop to come home and explode. And it feels like someone has a heavy hand around his heart and is squeezing just enough to make him feel like it’s going to burst. There’s so much pressure in his chest. He wants to scream.

And sometimes he does. He starts to. He kicks the couch or the wall or the table or the dresser and he screams and throws a fucking fit, basically, and he looks to Hop who just…… looks tired. Whose eyebrows are knitted like Neil’s would be but who just sighs and raises his voice a little bit but only loud enough so Billy can hear him over all of his own yelling. So Hop can tell him he’s going to take away his toys. Like his car, or his tv privileges.

Billy will get drunk and Hop will make sure he’s physically alright before punishing him. Billy stays out too late and Hop is stern and strict but never lays a hand on him. Billy flinches out of habit when Hop goes to touch him and it doesn’t take long before Hop stops doing it. And Billy isn’t stupid, he watches as Hop begins to treat him like a scared animal, and Billy really wants it to piss him off more than it does. But in reality, it makes him feel kind of… cared for?

But that scares Billy more. Every day that goes by is a day where he’s forced to lean a little further out over the edge but is just waiting to be pushed. It’s so much. It’s too, too much. He’s going to go insane waiting.

So he incites it.

He’s had a beer or two but he’s more drunk on his anxiety and fear and stress than anything else so when Hop gets home Billy sits there and lets the man say hi and ask if he wants anything specific from the grocery store because he’ll be going tomorrow and “if you have time and wanna come, you can do that too” and-

And Billy is going crazy. He’s a shaken up soda bottle. He’s a firework that failed to launch. He’s got so much pressure inside of him his ears are whistling with it like a kettle screaming in the morning and he stands himself up and stares Hop down and his eyes are red from where the tears threatened and he’s screaming: “Just fucking do it already!”

Hop blinks.

“Wha-?”

“What the fuck are you waiting for? What are you, a pussy? Think I’m a pussy? Because I can fucking handle it. What I can’t handle is all of this waiting around! So just fucking get it over with, goddamnit!”

And Hop is…. Confused as all hell. Blinking and hands itching to rub at his eyes to check if this is all a dream.

“Do what?” Hop asks.

“Hit me!” Billy yells. “Just fucking hit me! I can’t…. I can’t do this! This is fucking worse! You sadistic motherfucker, just get it over with and hit me!”

“Billy I’m-”

“Don’t give me that bullshit! I know you’re dying to! I’m- I’ve been… I’m a brat. I’m rude and I break shit and I don’t give you respect and you’re just dying to hit me, I can tell, so just fucking do it already!”

And Billy’s hands are twitching, looking to punch someone himself because there’s too much inside of him. There’s too much of everything inside of him. And he’s watching Hop’s eyes watch him with fear and that same fucking concern that’s always in his eyes and Billy just…. He can’t take this. He’d rather fight than sit here and understand what he’s feeling.

So he stomps over, boots hitting the ground and reaches his hands out to shove Hop.

“What, do you need some more reasons?” He asks, shoving Hop again. Hop just lets it happen, stumbling back a bit. Billy begins to punch at him, landing a few on his chest but they’re weaker than he wants bc he’s tired and confused and honestly freaked out at the thought of actually hurting this man and wow that’s kind of a new feeling.

And Hop is…. Speechless. He lets Billy hit him. He watches the boy tire himself out. He briefly thinks of the bruises he’ll probably have in the morning. The boy gets a solid punch in, but Hop already knew that, bc he’s heard through the town about the fights he gets in.

Billy’s just standing there, breathing heavy bc he’s winded. He feels tired and sick and so winded and he flinches hard when Hop puts a hand on his shoulder but Hop doesn’t pull away this time. In fact, he doubles down and puts his other hand on Billy’s other shoulder.

“Son-”

“Stop calling me that.” Billy mumbles but Hop shakes his head.

“Son.” He doubles down. He’s gonna keep doubling down. This shit is too much for him to watch and not say something about. “You… I’m not going to hit you. I’m never going to hit you.”

Billy grumbles. Squirms.

“I can fucking handle it you jackass-”

“The point isn’t that you can handle it, the point is that you never should have had to learn to handle it in the first place. Don’t you get it? You didn’t deserve what you got before. You didn’t deserve any of that, alright?” Billy is still squirming, eyes squeezed shut, water in the corners as he tries desperately to get away but Hop refuses. “Damnit kid, will you listen to me?? You didn’t deserve any of what you got! And that asshole of a man didn’t deserve you!”

And Billy feels the sob pull itself out of his chest and up through his throat and his face flushes bc of it. Bc he’s embarrassed. Bc he can’t believe he’s crying to this man right now but this is his… this is his dad, isn’t it?

“I just…. I know it’s… I know. I know you want to-”

“What I want is for you to drink some water, eat some food, and get some rest. I’m not going to hurt you.”

“But-”

“I promise I won’t let anything hurt you.” Hop says determinedly and incredibly stupidly. Bc it’s a stupid promise to make, it really is. Billy knows it.

“You can’t promise that.”

“Well I just did, so.” Hop is stubborn. Billy lets him be. Billy lets Hop pull him into a tight hug. Billy lets himself feel comfortable in it.

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spacedoutwrites · 5 years ago

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the past will be the past (but the future is brighter than any flashback)

This is my @irondadficexchange fic for the lovely @iamirondad 🎉🎉🎉

The prompt I chose to use was Peter gets hurt on patrol. The title of this fic comes from the song January White by Sleeping at Last.

Hope you enjoy!

Post-endgame, Tony saved the world and survived. Life is finally getting back to normal. Peter goes out on patrol and everything is fine, until it's not.

Read on AO3

“Dang.” Peter muttered.

Everything had been going fine, great actually.

It was a few months after everyone returned from their five year disappearance and things were finally getting settled down. Thanks to Doctor Strange, Tony was starting to get back on his feet after wielding the gauntlet. It hadn't been easy, but he was determined to get back to normal, or as close as he could get. Peter and May had a new apartment in Queens, school would start soon, and Spider-Man was finally patrolling again.

But now, it was only Peter’s third afternoon back on the streets and there was already a knife in his thigh.

Admittedly, he had been a little distracted (maybe things hadn't been quite as great as Peter wanted to believe). Putting the suit back on had been harder than he expected it to be. The first few times he tried, he hadn’t been able to put it on at all. Anxiety and fear plagued him. The feeling of crumbling into nothingness, darkness slowly but inevitably consuming him, invaded his thoughts like a dense, unwanted cloud. In his dreams, he watched Tony die over and over and over. The man hadn’t even died in real life, but Peter’s subconscious had decided to play out the worst case scenario repeatedly.

The feeling that the people of New York needed him only heightened his anxiety. All he wanted was to get out there and help people, but he couldn’t, he wasn’t strong enough. The feeling of utter incompetence was paralyzing, shaking him to his core. If he couldn’t be Spider-Man, who was he?

It had taken time, especially time with Tony, for Peter to feel like he was ready to go out again. The nightmares were finally receding, the anxieties lessening. His first two patrols had been mostly uneventful and he had felt great afterward, but for some reason it was different this time.

A guy had stolen some lady’s purse and run off with it. Peter was hot on his heels, hoping he could get the purse back to its rightful owner, and maybe web up the thief while he was at it, but while he was running, Peter’s heart rate had sped up more than usual. His senses tingled, something felt wrong, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. He ignored the feeling as he caught up to the purse snatcher, but that turned out to be a big mistake.

The man turned as Peter grabbed his shoulder, immediately plunging the knife Peter hadn’t noticed into his thigh.

As Peter stumbled back, the man continued running, turning down an alley and out of sight.

“Dang,” Peter muttered, looking down at his right leg. The suit was already turning a darker shade of red. He shot a web up the nearest building and swung himself onto the roof.

He wanted to go after the attacker, but his vision was starting to get blurry, his head starting to spin. The stab wound wasn’t that bad, right? He plopped down unceremoniously on the ground, careful not to disturb the knife that was still in his leg. The pain and the fuzziness reminded him of Thanos and the stones and the gauntlet and that stupid planet and watching the people around him turn to dus-

“Incoming call from Tony Stark,” Karen said, interrupting Peter’s spiraling thoughts.

“Dang,” Peter said again, face scrunching up as a wave of dizziness rolled through him. “Decline the call.”

“I’m afraid he’s bypassing my control,” Karen said. Before she could say anything else, the call went through.

“Peter?” Tony’s worried voice rang in his ears. “Are you okay, kid?”

Peter opened his mouth to answer, but he felt like he couldn’t breathe in enough air, so he gasped instead.

“Peter?” Tony’s voice was growing louder and more concerned. “Can you answer me? What’s going on?”

Peter gasped again, finally getting enough air. “I’m fine,” he said, his voice rising about an octave higher than usual. “Just a little accident, everything’s fine.”

“I got a notification from your suit that said it was punctured by a knife,” Tony said, sounding completely unconvinced of Peter’s answer.

“Yeah…” Peter started. “But I’ll be fine, I’m sure it’ll heal up real quick.”

“Absolutely not,” Tony said sternly, “get to the tower now.”

Peter’s breathing was still irregular and labored, “I would,” he said between gasps, “but I think I’m having a panic attack or something.” He paused, “I- I think I’m just gonna lay here for a little while.”

“I’m sending a suit,” Tony said, his voice still agitated.

“Oh, you really don’t have to,” Peter said, “I’ll be fine in a minute.”

“Shut up Parker, the suit’s already on its way.”

Peter pulled his mask off so he could breathe more easily. His chest still felt unusually tight, his throat constricted. What was wrong with him? This wasn’t exactly the first time something had gone awry while he was on patrol. He’d been shot, stabbed, knocked out, pretty much every trick in the book, but he could usually walk it off. This was different. There was a sense of dread and panic lurking somewhere inside of him. He felt as though, at any moment, he would crumble again, floating away, just dust in the wind.

At that mental image, he gasped again, tears were starting to gather in his eyes. He heard something approaching, but he was still laying on the roof, pinned down by his own intrusive thoughts.

“Hey, Pete,” he heard Iron Man’s voice, the outline of the suit coming into view. “I’m going to get you back to the tower, okay?”

Peter didn’t respond, everything was blurring around him again.

“Peter!” Iron Man’s voice sounded upset, almost like he was dying again.

The pain that blossomed from Peter’s leg was suddenly amplified. I’m dying. Was all he could think. Tony’s right there, but I’m dying. It was all too familiar. He can’t save me. No one can save me. In his mind, he could imagine the tips of his fingers starting to disintegrate. Please, not again.

He didn’t realize it, but he was sobbing now.

Iron Man gently picked him up and held him close, careful to avoid jostling his leg. He was saying something to Peter, talking quietly to him, but Peter couldn’t seem to understand what he was saying.

“I don’t wanna go, Mr. Stark,” he gasped.

The suit stopped talking at that, and after a moment they took off from the roof, not flying too fast, but getting Peter back to the tower, back to Tony, as quickly as possible.

When they landed on top of the recently re-acquired Stark Tower, Tony was waiting, Helen Cho by his side.

Tony hurried over to Peter, who was still being held by the suit.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Tony said quickly, cupping Peter’s face in his hands. “You’re going to be okay bud, everything’s going to be just fine, I’ve got you.”

Peter took a shuddering breath, tears still streaking down his face. He let out an involuntary cry, unable to calm himself down.

Tony’s thumb gently wiped at Peter’s cheek. He ran a hand through the boy’s sweaty hair. “We’re going to take good care of you, Pete, your leg will be all better in no time. We have to get you down to the med bay now.”

Tony held onto Peter’s hand as they headed to the elevator, the Iron Man suit still carrying the boy.

Helen injected Peter with pain meds first, a dose strong enough for him to pass out within a few minutes. Under Tony’s watchful eye, she removed the blade from Peter’s thigh, cleaning and stitching up the wound before she left the meds and Peter’s advanced healing to take care of the rest.

Tony stayed in the room while Peter slept, going through the footage from Peter’s suit, trying to figure out what went wrong.

Peter’s frightened cries stabbed at his heart, reminding him too of the worst day of everyone’s lives. “ I don’t wanna go, Mr. Stark” echoed around in his mind.

After a couple of hours, Peter started awake, a frenzied look in his eyes.

Tony was by his side in a heartbeat. “You’re safe, Pete,” he said. “Everything’s okay.”

Peter looked around the room frantically until his eyes settled on Tony. He relaxed, laying back down on the bed with a relieved sigh.

“How do you feel?” Tony asked carefully.

“I’m really tired,” Peter said, rubbing at his eyes.

Tony nodded, “the meds really wiped you out.” After a moment, he ventured further, “what happened out there?”

Peter’s brow furrowed, “I don’t know,” he sat up gingerly. “I started out doing my usual thing. I helped a cat that was stuck in a tree, I stopped someone from breaking into a car, you know, what I always do. But then I went after this purse-snatcher and something felt wrong, but I didn’t know what, and then I wasn’t really paying attention, and then the guy stabbed me and ran away.”

Tony leaned forward in his seat, “did you figure out what was wrong?”

Peter shook his head. “I guess I was sensing the knife, but that didn’t really seem like the problem. It was the first time my senses were warning me that I was in danger like that since… well since I died.”

Tony swallowed hard. “That’s why you had a panic attack.”

“Yeah,” Peter said sheepishly. “I’ve felt it in my dreams plenty of times, but this felt so much like I was going to disappear again that it freaked me out.”

“That would freak me out too,” Tony said. “It did freak me out.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Peter said, sounding discouraged. “I thought I was ready to be Spider-Man again, but at the first sign of trouble I flipped out.”

“It’s totally normal to feel that way,” Tony reassured him. “It can take a long time to recover from something traumatic like that.”

“I know,” Peter sighed, “but I’ve been sitting around long enough. I just want to get out there and do something, start helping people again. I don’t want the past to stop from doing stuff now.”

Tony nodded, “I know how you feel. After Loki and his little army invaded New York, I felt like I was never going to be normal again. Any thought of aliens or wormholes or almost dying would set me off like nothing else. I didn’t feel safe anymore and I let fear control me for a really long time.”

“What did you do?” Peter asked. “How did you feel safe again?”

Tony paused. “I guess I learned to live one day at a time,” he finally said. “I realized that I was taking the present for granted. The past is something that already happened and you just have to look to the future, let it pull you in, away from your past, away from all of the crappy stuff and into something new and exciting and beautiful.”

“Or you could just discover time travel and go back and fix it,” Peter suggested mischievously.

Tony reached out and messed with Peter’s hair. “Only for you, kid. Overly sentimental speeches aside, I just want you to know that it’s okay if you’re not ready to go out as Spider-Man yet. That doesn’t mean you aren’t Spider-Man anymore or anything like that, it just means that you need to take a little extra time to recover.”

Peter nodded. “I think I’ll take another week or two off, see how it goes from there.”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Tony said. “We have to fix your suit now anyway.”

Peter laughed, “that’s true.”

“I just finished some upgrades on the Iron Spider,” Tony added. Once we get you in that, you won’t have to worry about silly little knives anymore.”

Peter smiled, “thanks, Tony.”

“For what?” Tony asked, looking mildly confused.

Peter shrugged, “for looking out for me. It’s really nice to know you’ll always have my back.”

Tony couldn’t help but grin. “Of course, kid.” He pulled Peter into a tight hug. “Always.”

#irondadficexchange #irondad fic exchange #irondad #spiderson #peter parker #tony stark #injured peter parker #panic attack #comfort #fanfiction #endgame fix

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kn1feinthec0ffee · 4 years ago

Text

in too deep (part 3)- jules

jules x reader

warnings: language, anxiety, creepiness, some violence, homophobia, overall just weird vibes (if you’ve seen the movie you know what i’m talking about)

TW: MENTIONS OF NON-CON (please don’t read if you’re triggered by this!! this was the bit of the story i had to change for the story to make sense since i swapped mickey’s gender. it doesn’t actually happen, but if the threat triggers you, do NOT READ!!!)

notes: i’m gonna try and keep this one shorter bc writing long chapters stresses me out

also! i’m writing this based on a pdf of the original script for the movie, so some dialogue may be different, or it may be my own creation because believe it or not, there are times that i do in fact possess creativity!!

you woke up with a jolt, dreams of the strangest variety plaguing your subconscious. you reached up to touch your pounding head- well, at least you would’ve if it wasn’t restrained.

“what the hell?” you tugged on the handcuffs, quickly realizing your legs were tied down, too, rendering you completely immobile. upon discovering this, you began to panic, breaking out in a cold sweat as you called out for your security blanket. “jules! jules!”

“she’s not gonna hear you. she’s down in the basement with sweetiepie.” gloria said calmly as she entered the room.

not impressed with her answer, you questioned her. “what are you gonna do to her?”

“my, my. you asked about her safety before even questioning yours! the bond the two of you share must be stronger than i thought.” she mused, looking down at your panicked expression. “your belle is safe and sound, don’t worry. but if you want to see her again, you’re going to have to cooperate.”

“cooperate? what the fuck are you gonna do to me?” you wrenched at your restraints, your heart rate beginning to pick up sufficiently. you depended on jules more than any other person in your life, and without her, you began to quickly unravel.

“just sit tight, all will be revealed soon enough.” gloria stated with an eerie smile. you hated how calm she was, it made you feel like she knew something you didn’t. “would you like to see some photos of my son?”

was she serious? look at some photos of her son? all you wanted was their car! how did you end up in this mess? the sudden aggravation caused you to lose your composure.

“no, i don’t wanna see any pictures of your fucking son! i wanna get my girlfriend and that fucking kid and get the fuck out of here!” you screamed. “i wanna get the fuck away from you and your crazy ass husband! i wa-” your sudden outburst was cut off by a firm slap, giving you little time to react before gloria had you in a chokehold.

“you keep your damn mouth shut! you won’t refer to anyone in this family like that under my roof!” you spat in her face, taking in a wheezing breath as she let go of you to wipe her face. her sudden anger morphed into what you assumed was her signature brand of unnerving calmness.

“you wanted to know what i’m going to do to you? i’ll tell you.” she smiled creepily. “you see, george and i have wanted our own children for the longest time, but that’s just not what the good lord had planned for us. so think of yourself as a vessel for us. an oven for our bun, if you will.”

your jaw dropped, the color in your face draining as your eyes widened in shock. “fuck! what the fuck? that’s so fucking fucked up! you’re not gonna fucking touch me, you bitch!” you couldn’t catch your breath, your chest heaving with every intake of air.

gloria got up to leave, her long skirt spinning with a flourish as she made her way to the bedroom door. “d-don’t f-fucking leave,” you wheezed as she exited the room, slamming the door behind her.

“jules!” you shouted. “jules, please fucking help me,” you whimpered, shutting your eyes in defeat.

-------------------------------

time ticked by slowly, your arms and shoulders starting to ache as they were held in the same position. you tried to reposition them to get some relief, but none came.

suddenly, you heard the door click open, your eyes flitting up hopefully. gloria entered with a grin on her painted lips, making her way towards you.

while you were in the room by yourself, you had used the time wisely to come up with what would hopefully be a successful escape plan. you looked up at her with your best puppy dog eyes. “gloria, can we talk?”

“absolutely. what’s on your mind?” it was creepy how quickly she seemed to get over your defiance from earlier, but you pushed the thought from your mind.

“well, honestly, your proposal.” you began. “i know how i acted the other day was totally uncalled for, and i’ve reconsidered.”

“well, you didn’t really have much of a choice, sweetheart, but i’m glad you feel that way.” she stroked a hand over your stomach, making you feel physically sick. “is there anything else?”

“yeah, there is. can we start now? i wanna start these happy nine months as soon as i can.” you faked a smile, the words coming out of your mouth churning your insides.

“well yes, i guess that could be arranged,” she moved to get up and you panicked, your plan quickly setting out of motion.

“wait!” you exclaimed. “can you uncuff me? i don’t think it would really be enjoyable if i was tied down like i am now.”

she looked skeptical, but sat down next to you anyways. “give me one good reason you wouldn’t be trying to escape as soon as i untied you.”

“well, i’ve had a change of heart.” no i haven’t. “i’ve considered it, and i think you’re right.” no you’re not. “i think this experience would be really beneficial to me,” no it wouldn’t. “especially if i wasn’t chained to the bed the whole time.” definitely not.

“it seems that you’ve really put some thought into this, i’m very proud of you.” gloria crooned. she sat on the side of the mattress, working on uncuffing your hands from the bedposts. as soon as both your hands were free, you took a tight grip of her hair and used your body weight to launch her off of you and onto the floor. she cried out, clutching her head as you worked at the ropes around your ankles.

“you psycho fucking bitch!” you cursed at her. “i’m getting my girlfriend and that fucking kid and we’re getting the fuck out of here!” once your legs were finally free, you took off, running down the stairs as the damsel called out for her husband.

you raced towards the door, prying at the handle, when a gunshot goes off right next to your head. you jumped in fear, raising your hands in defense to see george at the top of the staircase, wielding your pistol.

“exactly what in the hell do you think you’re doing? get your ass up here!” he shouted, waving the weapon threateningly. when you stood frozen in your tracks, he spoke again. “i’m a crack shot, kid. i missed you on purpose that time. now get on up here.”

you grudgingly headed up the stairs, keeping your wide eyes facing straight ahead. you heard gloria sobbing in the other room, sounding as distraught as ever, and you knew you were in for it. “who the hell raised you like that? you of all people making a woman cry like that.”

“i’d blow your brains out if i thought you had any,” george sighed. “well, i’ll tell you one thing; you’re a bit too spry for my liking.”

suddenly, he pulled the trigger, and the bullet ripped through the meat of your thigh. you screamed in agony, clutching the wound as you cried out. “fuck! what the fuck? you just fucking shot me!”

he acted like it was nothing, simply tossing a towel at you to stop the bleeding. “quit your whinin’, ya sally. we’ll get you bandaged up.”

----------------------------

“don’t make me put another bullet in ‘ya. just behave, goddammit!” george growled as he dragged you down the basement stairs. through your hazy vision, you were able to make out jules handcuffed to a pole not too far away from the girl. he drops you to the floor, yanking your hands behind your back and cuffing them next to jules’.

“y/n!” jules called out, a happy yet worried smile making its way onto her lips. her gaze landed on your leg, her eyes widening when she saw the bloody wrappings. “oh my god! you motherfucker, what did you do to her?”

“what are you blind? i shot her.” george stated matter-of-factly. “now you two keep quiet down here. keep an eye on ‘em, sweetiepie.” he looked over to the girl before heading upstairs.

“fuck, i’m so happy you’re alive, baby! i heard those gunshots go off and i was so scared i was gonna lose you! are you okay?” jules blurted out, trying to turn towards you.

“it hurts so fucking bad, but i’m okay.” you panted, breathing labored. you wriggled your arms, pulling on the cuffs frustratingly.

“can you pick it?” jules asks hopefully. your heavy eyes darted around the basement, searching for something in arm’s reach small enough to fit in the keyhole.

“i don’t have anything to pick it with.” you huffed, leaning your head back against the pole as tears of frustration brimmed your eyes. “shit!”

you peeled your eyes open to look around the room once more, eyes landing on sweetiepie as she stared back at you in fascination. you had had enough of this little girl; she was the reason you were in this whole mess. if she just would’ve fucking cooperated, the three of you could be outta here and on the route to florida. “oh, i’m so glad you’re here, i didn’t get the chance to say fuck you!”

jules nudged you with her elbow, as if to discourage you from swearing at the child. “leave her alone, she feels bad. she didn’t know what she was doing.”

“how the hell do you know? she talked?” you asked in confusion at her statement.

“i don’t know, i just do.” jules shrugged. sweetiepie had resumed playing with her toys once more, the little princess dolly riding away on the heroic stallion’s back. you sighed at the seemingly hopeless situation, letting your eyes fall shut.

this was gonna be a long night.

***************************

okay so an itty bitty change of plans: if this ended where it was originally supposed to, it would be really long and kinda unsatisfying (to me at least), so i’m splitting this into two chapters.

which means that instead of a 5-part series, this will be 6 parts! it just makes more sense to me that way.

anyway, i hope you guys enjoy!! i really had fun writing this part!

tags: @emmyrosee @flowers-in-your-hayr @willyourecognisemee @bill-skarsgard-owns-my-ass

#jules #jules x reader #jules imagine #jules oneshot #jules fic #jules fanfic #jules fanfiction #jules villains #villains #villains 2019 #maika monroe #maika monroe character #my writing

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