#and makes an effort to keep you alive
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Thought you would like to be informed that while I was playing a community server Degroot Keep I was the only medic on the whole server, my team kept flicking around me to make sure I wasn’t in danger and so they could get heals. There was one friendly heavy on the other team ONLY TO ME and he crouch walked over to me whenever he spotted me lol
im glad your team was protecting you! as a medic youre always going to have a massive target on your back, but its nice when your team actually tries to keep their medic alive isnt it?
#being a free source of health makes you incredibly important to the team#and as a healer there are going to be many cases where you are the deciding factor if your team will win or lose#your team has to play their parts too of course#but the point is deciding who lives and dies#and being that vital member of the team is wonderful i think#but it also mean that everyone really really wants you dead....#so its always nice when your team is aware of that#and makes an effort to keep you alive#the doc is in#replies from the void#tf2
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#not to be dramatic or alarmist. but I do want to kill myself again.#I'm so tired. I'm so exhausted. i have to keep going. nothing is working. i have to keep going.#i will make it through this and i will be okay.#I'm just losing my fucking mind having everything constantly fall apart and constantly being inept#I'm saddened by what i believe to be a cycle of my own creation. a failure to break it and untangle the knot at my centre.#i feel like I'm just stuck here. it's been weeks.#I'm so tired. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. I'm so tired.#I'm just. journalling I guess. idk if you're reading this but if you are I'm gonna be alive in the morning.#just. the desire for my circumstances to be different is very intense.#I'm drawn to extreme measures but they're less effective than those that take prolonged effort.#i often panic and make rash decisions#and I'm very much incapable of accepting guilt without initially attempting self destruction#these are issues I'm aware of existing but lack the necessary insight or skills to fix.#i have been running from myself and my problems and my past for my whole fucking life.#and i don't know how to stop running.#evie posts
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some funny snippets of a tentative timeline for the reverse gondolin au
#silm#silmarillion#not art#reverse gondolin au#Gondolin-born Prince Elrond is a bit more active in numenorean politics#primarily attempting to keep them from self-destructing#numenor still Falls after sauron establishes his weird morgoth death cult#because having numenor around in the TA means there wouldn't be a war of the ring in the first place#but like 60% of them are still Faithful#they establish themselves in Imladris under Tar-Miriel & Elrond (Tar-hanotur? Tar-airatur?) btw#Prince Elrond is quite fascinating to write#also yes annatar is literally booted out under lomions advice#celebrimbor still struggles with his overly-trustingness#luckily for everyone lomion has no such reservations#lomion: tyelpe i know you dont trust yourself on this but. you trust me right#tyelpe: of course#lomion: okay then somethings up with that guy. get him out of your house asap#tyelpe: thanks will do#debating whether to kill off celebrimbor here? if he does die it would be in battle next to lomion so sauron doesnt learn of the Seven#also this tyelpe & lomion have been actively using the Three in battle since FA 500something#they're pretty experienced at the magical siege warfare stuff#so maybe celebrimbor makes it out alive but injured?#okay imagine a white council w assorted wizards; galadriel; cirdan; elrond; the numenorean king in imladris; lomion; and celebrimbor#i feel like lomion and tyelpe balance each other out well enough (lomion is still quite pragmatic but less actively distrusting than maegli#and tyelpe is constantly making an effort to be Wise and Understanding#he doesn't trust himself on big decisions bc of the whole feanorion baggage. but he does trust his bff lomion#so their dynamic is kind of like 'tyelpe has a Good Idea; lomion Validates his Good Conscience and figures out how to execute it'#btwn making the Three a few centuries ahead of schedule and them balancing each other out galadriel-and-celeborn-style they're kind of op#idk how sauron amasses that much power in the SA/TA of the au-verse
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i need to [remembers making suicide jokes is bad for you] write a musical theater style song for myself about how my heart feels like it's going to explode
#bluebird.txt#i think for tonight i will ignore my feelings#and not in a depression way#but in a. it's 10pm bestie. i'm not going to metamorphose into the impossible perfect version of me now. there is nothing i can do about an#of this so i just have to go about my life. way.#told my teacher about something i do to like. keep myself functioning and alive#that i previously thought was pretty neat of me and i took pride in wanting to be alive and using my free will#and she immediately said hm yeah that's definitely a survival mechanism#like what no#do you mean. do you mean some people are just alive and that's it? they don't. they don't have to make an effort to do it?#i wanna take a survey except i can't because that's weird and i don't have a doctoral thingy to hide behind#i can't just go around university being like 'hey are you alive on purpose or do you wake up and just function'#AH okay thinking done !!!! ya se acabo. finish homework. write to do list. go to sleep. don't explode.#save me twentyonepilots truce
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Happy new year everyone! Wishing you guys all the best for 2024. May this year be full of love, health and happiness 😊💖
Love ya🫶
#happy new year!!#and thank you to all my wonderful mutuals and followers who keep this hellsite alive and make it a fun experience#despite all of tumblr's efforts to ruin this site :)#love uuuu all <3
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Why Kenny is so loved and David is so hated?
This question's been in my inbox forever because I didn't know how to answer it... and I still don't tbh
Kenny's a more established character. We've known him longer, he's has a stronger connection to Lee and Clementine, and the Kenny crowd are ride or die for him. When we first meet him in S1 ep1, we get the impression of a decent family man dedicated to his family, and then he goes through a roller-coaster of tragedy and character development.
David, on the other hand, is only in one game... a game that a lot of fans consider the worst installment in the series. We don't have enough time with him, and even though he has a strong connection to Javi as his older brother, players aren't attached to Javi, they're attached to Clementine. You know how this works- if Clementine no like, then we no like >:[ and Clementine no like David. Therefore, David bad.
And to be fair, she does have legit reasons for not liking him, but that just gives the player all the more reason to dislike him.
So even though I would consider David the "Kenny" of ANF, most people who loved Kenny still labeled David an asshole even though there is an interesting parallel there... which he is an asshole, but he's an interesting asshole... he just wasn't given the proper development like Kenny was.
I've said before that David is a "problematic fave" of mine, and I do hesitate to double down on that just yet. I haven't replayed ANF in forever and who knows, perhaps my opinion on him has changed like it has for a few other characters so I don't want to be like "and I still stand by the fact that David's my favorite, he's a bitch and I love him!" until I'm sure I actually feel that way, y'know?
If I had to give you my best answer, anon, it'd be that Kenny's better established and David's thrown in, the games explore Kenny's issues more thoroughly than David's, and lots of people hate ANF but love S1 and S2.
Though now that we're talking about David, I'm curious if I'll still feel the same way about his and Javi's relationship throughout the game. I was always more interested in the brother relationship over Javi's romance with Kate. I wanted a brothers reconciling storyline from ANF, and I did get that storyline done well in another game [surprise to no one, it's Dragon Age 2, Carver is my bitchy baby brother and I love him so much] and I have a feeling that's going to affect my overall opinion.
Sigh, add it to the to-do list, one day I'll revisit ANF.
#asks#twdg kenny#twdg david#twdg javi#twdg clementine#answering this makes me want to do a garcia brothers vs hawke brothers comparison tbh#because i mean... david and carver are both soldiers who always felt overshadowed by their siblings#especially in feeling like their father favored the other over them and it made them bitter and caused tension in the relationship#and it takes effort on the players part to repair the relationship#hell you can romance the person they're romantically interested in.... though to be fair merrill isn't carver's wife#they never actually get together but it's pretty clear that he's interested in her#and i can say with confidence that carver won't beat you with a wrench if you romance her and he comes around to supporting you two#like the big difference is there's never any doubt that carver loves you no matter what path his story takes#david on the other hand tries to kill you with a wrench no matter what and then he runs away with gabe#and if you manage to keep him alive he's just like 'yeah that's my bad sorry bro do you think dad would be mad at me if he were here?'#so david and carver have surface level similarities but they differ at their core#....and i guess that's my tag ted talk about why carver good and david bad sksksksksks#i'm so sorry sksksks
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hilarious thing about arifer is that them at their most violent is also their most horny
#picture them interrogating someone and having to resort to the darker means but they can't stop fucking FLIRTING 🙄#like idk man. it would not be luc.ifer's fault if takahara covered in blood and making the suspect whimper in pain and smiling and giggling#like That gets him going. not his fault at all. and also not my fault if luc.ifer's instantaneous switch from “tired overworked mom” mode to#um. uh. um. yknow when he does that little ominous chuckle and the air crackles around him and his eyes glow a little in the darkness and#he's just Almost smiling and uh. hm. not my fault if he's kind of more attractive. than usual. especially since#he's actively showing off about it lmao. um. so yeah. pov you just slighted the demon prince and he sent his two favorite sadists after you#pov now they're putting way too much effort into keeping you hurt and alive to show off to each other. for some reason 😭 sorry#so. yeah. ANYWAY#hwsglgsfkjfdhkhddjkfdfhj moving on!#ari.stuffs#suggestive#it's too easy to hate you and hard to love.#side note this is why they never argue :3 they get angry and then “why are you hotter than usual that's not fair. oh well” OKAY ANYWAY!
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One of these days I'll write that 100k Cozy Glow/Flurry Heart slow burn fic that plagues my brain
#no you gotta understand#A young like early teens Flurry Heart rehabilitating Cozy and releasing her from the stone as kne of her first royal orders#and physically Cozy's a few years younger than Flurry but she's been alive for longer‚ just trapped in stone#Amd their relationship starts off with Flurry keeping her close wnd trying to pull a Starlight Glimmer w Cozy bc she's super forgiving#after being raised w the princess of love as ger mom and the princess of friendship as an aunt#(tho neither Cadence or Twilight approve of this rehabilitation plan)#Flurry is always at Cozy's side to make sure she doesn't try to take over the world and stuff (and there are times Cozy gets close to her#manipulative planning but they always get stopped before they can come to fruition and Flurry always vouches to give her another chance)#because they're friends#and as they age they become inseparable for no reason other than the pure enjoyment of the other's company#with the success of Cozy's redemption others get freed as well: Tirek and Chrysalis are released from the stone under supervision#efforts are made to return Sombra not as the king but as the umbrum colt Radiant Hope knew#Flurry Heart matures into the Princess of Change‚ and Cozy Glow her knight#(one sided) enemies to childhood friends to lovers
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god i get so sad thinking about how the parents of the kids that survive the crash but not all nineteen months don’t even get to know the truth about their child’s last moments. they don’t get to know what their last words were, how they were feeling. with the exception of laura lee’s family, they either get nothing and have to sit in that unknown, zero-closure space forever or they get a lie about frostbite and infection and starvation. and both are terrible for reasons they will also never know.
#and like. jackie’s death makes me sad for jackie. but akilah/crystal/mari’s deaths make me sad for them AND their parents.#like they’ll never know their daughters died in the cold or were hunted or eaten. that their bodies will never be found for a reason.#and i’m glad they’ll never know. but the other options are sad too like#you either never get an answer or you get an answer that keeps you up at night: what if we’d pushed for the rescue efforts to keep going?#would my child still be alive if we did that? etc#*
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The whole ignored vs forgotten poll is so interesting and ended up prompting me to reflect upon the thought process behind the bpd for me
Like I'm not fine with being ignored, but it hurts less because I can choose to ignore them back and cut them off and it's a "I left you before you left me" type of situation
Vs being forgotten that indicates that they never really gave a shit and that I've already been abandoned and then that ultimately triggers the SI and I'm just like 👁👄👁
#the bpd 100% changes the thought process for me#a lot of people said ignored bc someone makes that deliberate choice#but tbh being forgotten can also be a choice#because then you never mattered enough for them to want to maintain that connection#and then that triggers the SI#bc I'm like if no one is going to miss me anyway#then why am I spending so much energy and effort trying to keep myself alive#tw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicidal ideation#Kat rambles
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need to talk in the tags abt bcs for a second ...
#better call saul spoilers#spoiler warning seriously!!!#anyways#now.#while i have sooooome issues with how lalo's death was handled i feel like everythin in that regard has already been wrung dry#like a) good bc it shows the only way lalo could be beat was through a literal shot in the dark#b) lalo's showboating was the reason for his death#c) underwhelming end bc he had no plot armour and it wouldnt make sense to keep him alive so last-ditch effort to tie off loose ends#but one thing i havent seen anyone mention (though i dont tend to peruse fandom spaces so maybe i just missed it)#is the parallels with the old slippin jimmy scams#MAYBE I AM READING TOO FAR INTO IT but what else is media for but me doing exactly that#i wouldnt think it had it not been for the shot of just his legs#which is the most evocative shot of that whole sequence#mirroring marco's feet sticking out from behind that dumpster#lalo pulled off his of convincing gus he had been killed during the hit#but you can only come back from the dead so many times my friend! im sure that's not the first time he's done it#and yet on death's door despite not getting the revenge he was seemingly willing to do anything for#he is smiling and clearly enjoying himself#it's fun for him!!! the hunt is fun and knowing he almost got away with every single thing he had tried was exhilirating!!!#knowing gus only got the upper hand because he was a coward who prepared for lalo's return after sending ppl out to do his dirty work!!#also something abt lalo dying in that fashion... ohhhh i KNOW he's a ghost. i know a creature like that could never truly die...#i hope he haunted gus til the day he died. i hope gus knew lalo essentially provided the trigger for his demise as well!!#every time gus goes down to the laundry superlab he just sees lalo's dead fuckin eyes staring up at him from a dark corner#anyways... had to yell for a bit#tumblr messed up my tags but it's cool it's chill#brbabcs ramblings
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🪴In times when everything feels overwhelming and your inner world is heavy, know that your strength is not defined by how you feel. Even if today feels dark, you’re still a person of immense value and worth. Take things one moment at a time, and remember that your existence has a quiet resilience. You are doing your beset, and something to be proud of🪴
im barely a person, but alright. thanks for the kind words, i guess
who are you, anyway? are you the same anon from the other emoji asks?
#asks#that emoji gimmick makes me think that this is the same person as the other ones#yknow what#im not-so-secretly hoping this g or b sending asks on anon#but that's extremely unlikely#i dont think they've learned how to send asks#and this is writing style isnt like either of theirs#and you seem to know a little something about systems because you said inner world#which#funnily enough#it's the outer world that's the problem here#it's because i cant get a job or go to college#and thus cant move with my cat out of my abusive parents' place#so im stuck in an endlessly retraumatizing environment#with parents who treat me like some decoration or little kid when im in my 20s#who seemingly endlessly lie about supporting my efforts at independence#all while the 2 fps/crushes that ive loved for 5 years both rejected my romantic feelings and one of them even got into a relationship#and like#yea im a whole yanpilled jealousymaxxer and everything XD#but i am polyam#and it's not like i couldnt handle having a metamour#but i dont get that#i get nothing#i get to be loved “like a brother”#by the people that have literally been my reasons to stay alive#and yea i get it#this mentality is at odds with my whole relationship anarchy-adjacent stuff#but i can't fucking help it#and all that while my meds keep getting fucked with and i can't sleep#and then there's the anxiety of what happens if america fucks up and elects a fascist again. yeah if that happens i probably will die
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Tag Dump 3/4 -- Muses, pt 1
#∗ —— ❝ long live the walls we crashed through 》 amanda angelo#∗ —— ❝ look ma i ain't got no brains 》 s'chn t'gai avery#∗ —— ❝ i guess i'm making amends built to last 》 kov ladok axel#∗ —— ❝ wish i'd never grown up 》 benjamin dax rozhenko#∗ —— ❝ the world is always spinning and i can't keep up 》 bethany bashir#∗ —— ❝ everybody's falling in love while i'm stumbling home still drunk 》 charlene turner#∗ —— ❝ welcome to the new deja vu 》 s'chn t'gai diana#∗ —— ❝ what a time to be alive 》 grace grayson#∗ —— ❝ the credits are rolling; i'm still holding on 》 gracie cearne#∗ —— ❝ and if i seemed dangerous would you be scared? 》 s'chn t'gai grayson#∗ —— ❝ you are so real you are so rare 》 hazel malloy janeway#∗ —— ❝ there'll be peace when you are done 》 isabella 'willa' angelo#∗ —— ❝ remember us just like this forever 》 isadora kirk#∗ —— ❝ don't you cry no more 》 jessica angelo#∗ —— ❝ all this effort to make it look effortless 》 ji capricole#∗ —— ❝ never means forever 》 s'chn t'gai kye#∗ —— ❝ i know i keep my feelings so tucked away 》 kyla mccoy#∗ —— ❝ everyday a little more alive with all that i leave behind 》 lexa riker troi#∗ —— ❝ now is the time to seize the day 》 nancy sulu#∗ —— ❝ you know i got your back they'll never take that 》 kov ladok nicholas
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i think. i just want someone to hold me and tell me it's all right and for it to be something real
#prattledisaster#i get so so tired of being the way that i am alone sometimes#but i can't stop. i'm too much and not enough and no one's alive on this earth who's equipped to handle me#and i can't trust anyone enough to believe that they could. can't. idk. can't get over myself#i'm just tired of always being the one to make the effort. to talk. to fit in#i wish for once someone would want me enough to crawl on their knees forever and never expect anything in return#and then i'd want them just as much. and it'd be real#and i wouldn't have to keep waiting to believe that there may be someone out there who deserves me#anyway. can you believe this was brought on by me feeling like a worthless writer#as per usual
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"Do i look like i can work right now?"
Summery : he's needy for you and he's not afraid to show it <3
wc : 2k
Warnings : NSFW, fem!reader, ōral (f! recieving), bit of dry humping, making out, protected sex. Petnames used (honey, love, sweetheart.) No plot.
He was so done for.
Zayne exhaled shakily against your neck, his hands squeezing firmly at the dip of your waist for stability. He sounded needy, he looked needy, it's taking everything in him to not rip your nightgown off.
"You should be resting, but you occupy my every thought." He uttered in a hushed tone, but made no real effort to take you off his lap, instead pulling you even closer using his knee and burying his face on your chest.
"You're practically latched on me, Zayne." The words just rolled off your tongue it was almost infuriating.
Zayne wrapped one arm around your hips, keeping you firmly on his lap as the chair kept rocking back and forth with your combined weight. His other hand traveled up your back, up to your shoulder and neck, pulling you further down so he could nip at your collarbone with a sharp canine.
"You're one to talk, sweetheart. You're not being very cooperative with being treated properly, always gambling your life away—" he sounded frustrated, the last few words coming out in a low grumble.
You ignore his words, instead bringing your hand to playfully pinch at his earlobe before whispering, "is this how you usually treat your patients, doctor?"
"This is..." Unprofessional, he almost said, he knew well there wasn't anything professional about how he was acting with you at the moment. "...An exception."
He then continued to litter your skin with open-mouthed kisses, his hand trailing up to find your nape, tangling his fingers into your hair, playing with the textured strands.
"Is it because I'm that special someone?"
You really have no idea what kind of effect you had on him. Zayne's teeth grazed against your pulse point lightly, his tongue darting out for a brief taste of your skin. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't very affected by you.
"My special someone," he murmured, and can't help the low gasp that escapes his throat when you start rolling your hips against his, feeling himself going dizzy.
"M-my love," he protested weakly, a visible growing tent forming in his bathrobe, making it harder for him to stop himself from pulling you harder against his lap.
He grabbed you by the thighs and leaned back into the backrest, giving you less space to move but a better angle to straddle him instead. "Don't stop," you whisper next to his ear while you try to continue pushing yourself further into him that he had to suppress a moan.
Zayne was sensitive man, being pent up most of the time, so touch straved. "You're a terrible patient, you know that? Insatiable." He managed to get out.
"I'm a different kind of patient," you hum, trailing your fingertips along his visible bare skin of his chest.
He was going to combust if you didn't stop touching him like that.
"You're dangerous." he almost whimpered, his hands moving back to grip your hips, as if to steady them on his lap, but it took every ounce of his willpower not to grind them against his crotch.
God was he done, Zayne finally wrapped a hand around the back of your neck and pulled you back down for a crushing kiss. It was less of a kiss and more of a possessive mark, hungry and rough.
He wanted you, needed you, he couldn't get enough of you. His tongue delved into your mouth with a greedy swipe, tasting you, as if he was drowning in you and the only thing keeping him alive was your kiss alone.
His breathing grew erratic as his hands slid down from your hips, grabbing the backs of your thighs and squeezing at the flesh, pressing you more firmly against his lap so his obvious hardened cock was rubbing between your legs.
Your sounds were unforgettable, Zayne could never forget them, the gasps and small whimpers of pleasure. He was already gone.
"Goddamn it..." he cursed hoarsely against your mouth, his hands clenching tighter under your thighs, guiding your motions on his lap before bucking up roughly, letting out a quiet groan of his own in the process.
"such a foul mouth, doctor,"
"Don't push it," he grumbled, lifting you up to his waist, "Push it?" You ask while wrapping your arms around his neck as he walked you to his room, and upon the realization, tap on his shoulder, "wasn't i supposed to rest—"
"That doesn't mean you can't rest after, does it?" he responded, moving over to the edge of the bed before slowly lowering you down onto the sheets, his body caging you in between his arms and legs, his form hovering over you.
He wasted no time sliding his hand underneath your silky nightgown to feel your skin, pulling the fabric above your head, guiding your arms up.
Zayne was a weak, weak man. Weak for seeing you like this, glossy eyes, lips slightly swollen from his kiss and the way your chest rose and fell heavily with every breath. Just being able to see you like this alone was a privilege.
He let his hands roam over the curve of your stomach, "so pretty," he muttered, his eyes raking over your form.
He leaned down to graze your neck with a trail of open-mouthed kisses, his lips lingering and nipping the skin, he then slowly traveled down your collarbone and to the valley of your chest, his fingers fiddling with the clasp of your bra the entire time.
"Lift your hips." he commanded quietly, sending a shiver down your spine and heat pooling down as you obliged to his words.
The last thing on you, and Zayne was pulling the fabric out from underneath you, throwing the bra somewhere on the floor, his eyes dark as he raked his gaze over your soft mounds, "I'm never getting tired of this view." he whispered breathlessly, Upon holding your wrists down and claiming your lips again, it was impossible to not be sent into the next cardiac arrest.
Well good think your doctor is always here to tend to you.
"I've.. missed you,"
How was he supposed to hold back when you sounded like that? Your voice coming out in a low, needy whisper that drove him over the edge.
"You need me." he groaned, releasing your wrists so both his hands could run down your sides, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your panties before giving the fabric a tug. He reached over, grabbing one of your legs and hooking your knee over his shoulder before pressing a gentle kiss on the inside of your knee, He continued to make a trail kisses up your thigh until he reached right infront of your wet folds.
Zayne looked up when your hand came in contact with his hair while letting out a shuddering breath and a whisper of his name, your gazes heated as he moved his head further down to your core, using one hand to keep your thigh pinned over his shoulder before his eyes fixated on your clit, leaning down to kiss it.
You gasp. His tongue flicked out, tasting you, before he began to suck on your clit, his fingers trailing up to play with your hardened nipples, rolling and pinching them gently with his thumb and forefinger. He hummed when you start squirming, his tongue skillfully flicking and rolling around the bundle of nerves, Zayne didn't stop at just your clit, though.
He trailed his tongue lower, teasing your entrance, and you couldn't help but tug at his hair, hips coming to slowly grind against his face. "Stay still, you're doing well," he praised, his voice low and soft, you best know he's trying so hard not to rut against the mattress from how achy he felt. His tongue sliding in and out, coating it with your arousal. You could feel yourself getting closer, the pressure building up inside you.
And you think you might pass out when he starts sucking down. It was hard to stay still when you're so close to orgasm, that it was making your head blank, eyes half-lidded and heavy breaths coming out of your lips as you arch your back when you taste the sweet pleasure of your release.
Zayne lifted his head from between your legs, licking his lips appreciatively and giving your stomach a few fluttering kisses. "You okay there, honey?" He asked in a low, hoarse voice as he watched how your eyes were still half lidded, and how your draped your arm over your face.
You only nod in return, letting out a low "Mhm,"
He couldn't wait until he was on his knees positioned between your legs, throwing his bathrobe off from his body before reaching down to his painfully hard cock, stroking once, twice, and he had to stop himself because he could most definitely jerk off just by looking at your face, especially when you're naked like this.
Zayne swallowed thickly, shaking his head to himself from any other thoughts before reaching over to the nightstand and grabbing a condom, tearing it between his teeth then rolling it on himself, making sure it was on securely before moving between your legs.
He pressed the head of his cock against your entrance, staring into your eyes, waiting for you to give him the go-ahead. You nodded, your eyes still heavy with need, and he slowly pushed into you, his cock filling you up inch by inch.
Your jaw hanged, your body adjusting to him, your walls gripping his shaft. He continued to thrust in slowly, "you're the only thing..." He panted breathlessly into your neck, "the only thing i need in my life—" and he continued to rock against you with his thrusts slow and deep.
Zayne was taking his time now, slowly and with intent, he wanted to show you how much this moment means to him, how much you mean to him, how everytime you both have sex, it would feel like the first time every single time.
He lifted his head so that he could look at your face more clearly, his hands running over your sides, tracing the curves and the softness of your body, his fingers touching your skin as if to burn the feel of you into his memory.
His hand then trailed to your left wrist, taking your hand into his to interlace your fingers together, while his thumb brushed over the empty spot on your ring finger.
He internally cursed at himself for not getting you that ring he saw when he was on the way to the hospital. The beautiful gem resting on the window display, calling for him even.
Why didn't he just get it so he could make sure no one would ever look your way when they get the hint of the shiny ring sitting at your left ring finger?
Zayne then picked up the pace, his thrusts becoming harder and faster, your voice growing louder, accompanied by his frustrated grunts.
He could feel himself getting close, his thrusts becoming more erratic, "Come on, my love," he urged you desperately, "a-ah, Zayne—!" With a loud moan, you came, your body shaking and your legs convulsing around his waist.
He followed right after, slamming deep into you, his cock pulsing as he came, filling the condom with his hot seed. He held you close, both of your breathings heavy, taking a moment to hold you both close before slowly pulling out to dispose of the condom.
"Still have enough energy for cuddles?"
"Mm, I'd want nothing more than cuddles right now."
A smile formed on his face at your words, gently shifting himself back on the bed so that he was beside you, pulling you into his arms.
He wrapped his arms around you, and he let out a content sigh, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin, his head in the crook of your neck again, inhaling the scent of you, and he realized that he could stay like this forever. "Just a bit more before i clean both of us up.."
#zayne smut#zayne love and deepspace#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#zayne#lads zayne#zayne x reader#zayne x you#lnds zayne#love and deepspace smut
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trying to make friends in the sbb24 discord server and idk why im surprised by this considering its been happening for nearly thirty years, but: it's not working!
messaged the person i drew for sse to say hi (after spending a month digging up the courage to do it) and the response was just. silence
texted someone i met at a pride event to be like hey wanna hang and it's been crickets
#vancotxt#eli when are you going to learn to quit bothering people#of course if i keep to myself it comes across like im a self centered arrogant bitch#but as soon as i make an effort it seems to be like 'mmmmmm pass'#god damn it man youve been alive for three decades and this has been happening for all of them. take a fucking hint
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