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reiderwriter · 7 months ago

Text

Flirting with the FBI

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Word count: 7.1k

Request: Hiiii!! This is my first time requesting anything on this app, but Spencer reid has me in a chokehold. So, I was thinking that the reader is the unsub, and she's like this very good hacker who keeps teasing the fbi cause she's bored or something so she keeps sending hints about who she is or where she is but they keep getting nothing on her. And all of this just keeps getting on Spencer's nerves. And so when Spencer finds her, she keeps teasing him and acting like a brat so he "disciplines" her and takes her roughly and maybe a bit of spanking???

Warnings: a lot tbh - mentions of case details, mentions of domestic violence and police brutality, reader is a possible target of a serial killer, bad tech skills from the writer who really couldn't be bothered to do anymore research than the actual CM writing team, rough Dom Spencer, brat reader, sexual innuendo, semi-public sexual play, spanking, dirty talk (good girl, brat etc.) fingering, raw sex/creampie, aftercare, slight dacryphilia (crying kink) and bimbofication.

A/N: My last fic was a heartwarming family fic, and now I'm back to being depraved. Apologies to anyone here for cute fluff 😭

Masterlist

You always thought hacking the FBI mainframe would be hard, but it's one of the easiest things you've done all week.

If they were going to sit around doing nothing while a serial killer ran around in their own backyard, then obviously, they needed a helping hand. Or a helping poem or two.

Getting into their security camera feed was just an added bonus.

You grabbed your bowl of popcorn and settled into your desk chair, clicking open the window to find which room exactly they would gather in to freak out together.

You made sure to get their attention, blacking out all the computers in the office as they ran to a backroom where a very distraught looking blonde woman was sat. She was evidently the go-to tech support of about six agents who quickly ran to her room to figure out what the issue was. It was show time.

“There once was a serial killer,

Who ate boys and girl both for his dinner,

He cut, diced and slashed,

Left the feds quite abashed,

So I leave this message to be clearer”

The poem scrolled onto their screen on a loop, flashing in and out quickly before you let the computer systems relax again.

You thought they'd panic, scramble for a pen or paper or something, but none of the agents moved until the flashing was over.

You watched curiously as an older man took charge of the scene, likely directing the woman at the desk to figure out who you were, where you lived, and what your social security number was. She got to work quickly, and he moved on to the other agents.

None of them had written the poem down. None had even taken a picture, but one man started talking, and for a while, all eyes and attention in the room were focused solely on him. His hands moved as his mouth did, as if he were casting a spell over the room as he spoke. Even more intriguing was the fact that he rarely seemed to make eye contact with any of them as he spoke. He wasn't conversing or giving directions. He was simply talking.

And you really wanted to listen in.

The younger man began to walk and you watched him quickly pace over to a whiteboard, switching from one feed to another as he made his way there, and pick up a pen before notating the poem perfectly.

Whoever this man was, he was making you feel more and more excited about the game of cat and mouse you had begun with the FBI. You weren't entirely sure if he was to be the cat or the mouse, though.

A few days later, they'd seemingly lost the motivation to work, so you again did their job for them.

With another accompanying limerick to help them along, of course.

“There once was a bullpen full of agents,

Who thought they were very surveillant,

But a simply code crack,

And there system did hack,

A young girl who lived quite adjacent.”

This time, you let the words linger on the screen longer, as you slipped your information into their files, leaving more bread crumbs they could follow to the real villain.

The Agent - Doctor, you had since learned - took up his pen once again and scribbled your first poem next to your most recent.

Doctor Spencer Reid. An IQ of 187, three PhDs and however many Bachelor's Degrees, a member of the Behavioural Analysis Unit, and, as you could somehow tell from the grainy security footage, incredibly attractive man.

He was calm, again talking with his hands as he notated, again drawing the rooms attention like he was the sun and everything needed to orbit him to sustain life. You wondered what it would be like to fluster him.

Typing something out quickly, you broke back into the FBI system. It was risky doing it again so soon again, knowing that their tech analyst was already actively hunting you down, cyber-wise. But you couldn't resist.

“The tall, dark and handsome employee,

How I do wish that he could enjoy me,

I would gladly submit,

we match wit for wit,

But he's trying his best to arrest me.”

The BAU team stood silent on the camera before the two women on the team burst into rambunctious laughter. The camera feed was archaic, black and white, and grainy to boot, but even you couldn't miss the red stain against Doctor Spencer Reid's cheeks. A bonus was the other gentlemen subtly posturing, trying to figure out exactly which of them was “tall, dark, and handsome.”

The payoff for that poem was so great that over the course of the next few days, you kept serenading him with love poems among your quick hints about the actual crime being committed.

You'd first suspected the man of being dangerous when you'd seen the state of his wife. 19 domestic disturbance calls in two months, 0 arrests, and 1 very cushy job as a police detective. You'd done some simple computer programming for your local precinct, inputting data from cases into an algorithm that helped track everything easier, so you'd been intimate with cases that he'd handled.

A pattern had emerged, a series of murders of “undesirables,” people the city didn't care about when alive and certainly didn't have the resources to allocate to after their deaths. Prostitutes, the homeless, and runaway foster kids. All missing or dead, all cases handled by the same officer. The officer that lived next door to you and was one beer away from beating his wife into submission 5 days a week.

After your third 911 call, you'd been notified of your contract termination with the precinct. After the tenth, you noticed parole cars driving by every hour.

By call number 19, you were sure it was a miracle he hadn't tried to have you arrested.

So you turned back to the FBI to see what they could do about a man who treated his wife, and basically everyone else, like scum of the earth.

“Please don't get sidetracked by my hacking,

I'm a good girl, your team I am backing,

the killer, you see,

Is right now hunting me,

You're the ones who can do better tracking.”

You watched the tension snap back into place in the office as, for the first time, Spencer Reid was silent at your message. They all got back to work quickly, going over the files you'd dropped in their servers.

That night, Spencer Reid stayed in the office late, reading through piles and piles of files and looking for the connection he needed. You watched in pity, feeling almost guilty that you'd placed this burden on him instead of just approaching them honestly. But you'd called the police before, and it hadn't worked, so getting attention anyway you could was the only way to go.

You watched for so long that you began noticing his small habits. Each time you sensed frustration, he would run a hand through his hair and tug it slightly. When he found something, he leaned in closer to the page, as if his proximity to the words would make them clearer. Finally, he stood and began clearing his files. But you weren't quite ready to sign off yet, the shouting already beginning in the apartment next to yours, so you quickly typed out the first thing that came to mind to get him to stay.

“There once was a doctor called Reid,

Who I simply and truly just need,

I would lie on my back,

And then let him attack,

Any inch of my body with his seed.”

He fumbled the files in his haste to remove your words from his screen, from every screen now in the building, face awash with embarrassment as he looked around for some sign that no one witnessed your words.

Luck was not to be had as the tech analyst - Penelope Garcia - came shooting out of her office to join him in the near empty bullpen, and the older team leader - Aaron Hotchner - also looked out over the bannister from his office as they bore witness to your seduction.

You were driving Spencer Reid crazy.

He'd spent the last two weeks tracking down a serial killer who may or may not exist based on the word of a set of limericks delivered to the BAU through illegal means that had begun unabashedly flirting with him.

This latest limerick was his last straw.

“The cameras are how I can see you,

I do find myself enjoying the view,

His hair is so fine,

I wish he was mine,

The agent with more PhDs than two.”

“Another score, pretty boy, it was about time someone noticed your good looks instead of your brain for once.” Morgan patted him on the shoulder, barely containing his glee and laughter.

“She's watching us through security feed, and that's all you have to say?” he grumbled, writing out this limerick again, the words to the others burned into his brain. “She's playing with me.”

“It sure sounds like she'd enjoy doing just that,” Emily laughed from her desk, “but I think she might be right, Spencer. Every case file she's given us has suspicious activity on it. They're all unsolved, but the victims aren't linked.”

“He's crossing race and gender boundaries, but he's hitting undesirables.”

They had a case because of you. It didn't mean he wouldn't enjoy handcuffing you and putting you in a cell once this was all finished.

“WE'VE GOT ANOTHER ONE,” Penelope shouted from her office, to no avail. If it was at one computer, it was on all of them.

“The agents grew closer by day,

As the killer wanted to escape,

He paced across the floor,

As I watched by his door,

Getting closer than the agents could say.”

He paused then for a second, thinking through each of the limericks in turn and the panic began.

“Closer than… Emily, the officer that took in all of the cases, what was his name?”

“Officer Falstaff, why?”

“I think he might be our killer. And I think he knows she's on to him, or if he doesn't, he will soon.” He stood suddenly, grabbing a file and sprinting to Penelope’s office, Emily and Morgan trailing close behind.

“Spencer, wait-”

“No time. If we want them both alive, we have to move now.”

Throwing the door to Penelope’s room open, he didn't even bother with niceties.

“Can you get her a message?” He demanded, panting from the short run.

“A wha-? Spencer, what are you talking about?”

“Can you send the hacker a message? Or leave her one so she can find it when she comes?”

Penelope swivelled around in her chair once again, doing who-knows-what to answer his question.

“There's no telling what she actually sees in our servers, Spencer, we didn't see any breach in classified files, the only thing she's done is read your personal file and drop us hints.”

His hands closed into fists as he nodded along. “So no?”

“No, Spencer, I'm sorry. Why? Are you starting to grow fond of our little helper.”

“She's not our little helper. She's a criminal. And she'll be dead soon if I don't confirm with her that we have the right guy - excuse me.”

The anger was washing over him now, as he left the room to get some air, getting only as far as the corridor before slamming an open palm into the wall and resting his forehead against it for a moment, just thinking.

The stress of the case was almost too much for him as he turned around and rested his back against the wall, sliding down it until he was sat on the floor. He may have despised you at that moment, but he didn't want you to get yourself killed.

Something nagged him, still, some stress or anger that hadn't yet surfaced, or some case fact he was missing. A glint at the corner of his eye had him looking up to the camera currently trained directly on him.

Computers are useless, he thought to himself, when you can send a letter.

The next time you sat down at your desk, you weren't exactly shocked to see an up close and personal shot of Aaron Hotchner - they'd turned your security stream into a one way facetime and you were sat directly opposite the big boss himself in an interrogation room.

“Checkmate, I guess,” you said, waiting for the man to move.

A signal from behind the camera let him know you were online and watching. He picked up a pen and paper and scribbled down something before holding the note out to you once more.

The name and location of the bastard next door. They'd done it, and now you simply had to drop your evidence, shut down your computer, and wait for the sirens to sound.

You felt slightly sad typing out your last message, knowing that you had no more reason to stay in touch with the team now. Still, you were only human and couldn't resist the chance to say something more.

“Aaron Hotchner and his clever team,

Working with you has been like a dream,

When Reid comes it is wet,

And my mind is all set,

Oh, I do wish that he'd make me cream.”

The camera turned seconds after your message was sent, and there he was, reading intently, frow creased in annoyance as he tried to remain calm. He, too, picked up a pen and paper.

“I have questions,” the paper said when he turned it around. Holding it up for a few seconds before returning his pen to paper. You typed out a message before he could finish dictating his, though.

“When you find me there's lots for me to say,

I can't help simply feeling this way,

Your profile I read,

Can't believe you're a Fed,

I yearn for you all night and day.”

Somehow, the lines between his brow deepened as he quickly scribbled out another message. This one wasn't a question, though. It was simply two words.

He'd written your name on that paper. He'd found you.

You weren't sure if the tingle that ran up your spine was fear or anticipation. One one hand, you'd likely committed multiple felonies in the pursuit of justice, and the SWAT team about to pick up the killer was going to knock for you, too. On the other hand, it was pretty much a given that you would be seeing Spencer Reid in person in the next few hours.

“The Doctor had finally cracked it,

The only identity that could fit,

The pretty young thing,

Who'd been flirting with him,

And was thinking of sitting on his…”

You sent a second message along with the first.

“I couldn't make this one rhyme, Doc. Come and get me.”

The sound of the FBI outside your neighbour's door had you stepping away from the computer finally. It was time to get ready to see him. You stepped out of your robe and into the shower as you waited to be collected and hauled into a police vehicle.

xxx

So far, you were a bit disappointed by the look of the BAU offices. It was smaller than it appeared on the CCTV, and you hadn't exactly given the tour. Unless the whole tour was the wall from the elevators, through the bullpen and straight to interrogation room one. You were also slightly embarrassed that you had yet to be greeted by any of your favourite characters yet. The lead swat officer had led you in some desk agents dropping by to have you fill out some simple documents - waiving your rights and all that. You'd seen not even a single member of the BAU since dropping in two hours ago, but you felt his eyes on you.

You faced the mirror, trying your best to stare straight through it and into the man beyond.

Spencer Reid was there. He had to be. He was too curious to be anywhere else. You smiled at him through the mirror and waited.

You were right, of course. Spencer stood on the opposite side of the one-way window and watched you look for him in every inch of the glass. He watched you squirm when you couldn't find anything, watched you pick at your nails as he made you wait.

He watched you cross and uncross your legs, the short skirt you'd slipped into just before you left providing just enough mystery to catch his eye and his breath.

He was annoyed, frustrated, a little bit impressed, anxious, and - to his peril - turned on.

“Spencer,” Hotch said, breaking the man's concentration. “We can't keep her that much longer. Go in and say something, or I'll cut her loose.”

Reluctantly, he pulled his eyes away and stepped out of the waiting room before letting himself into yours.

“Miss Y/N, my name is Doctor Spencer Reid, I'm a profiler working with the Behavioural An-”

“You're joking, right?” You asked, eyes lighting up, spine straightening as you looked up at the man. “I know who you are, Doc.”

“Please call me Doctor Reid,” he asked, setting down a file on the table and looking over the desk at you.

“Oh, I don't even get your first name.” You lifted your leg and ran it along the side of his until he moved his chair back, just out of reach. You pouted as he began reading through documents, asking you to confirm exactly which technical breaches you were responsible for.

“And the breach at 1:27pm on Thursday 5th-”

“Yes, that was me, too. They were all me, Doc, is that all? Are we finished now?”

“I don't know, are we finished? Can I leave?”

“No,” you shouted, just as he stood up to gather his things. “No, don't go. I want to talk to you.”

He sat back down, finally looking at you instead of words on a page.

“Do you enjoy attention, Miss Y/N?” He asked, voice cold but gaze burning like fire into your skin.

“As much as anyone does.”

“Do you enjoy my attention?” The words hung between you for a few minutes as you watched him carefully, searching for the right answer.

“What do you think, Doc?”

“Doctor Spencer Reid,” he repeated reflexively.

“I know your name,” you smiled, and he finally looked away, breaking contact to regroup for a second.

“We have reason to believe you used your backdoor into our system to access my personal file, is that correct?” It may have been asked as a question, but Spencer Reid already knew the answer.

“Yes, I did.”

“Why?”

You laughed at the simple question, sure that your behaviour until this point was evidence enough to answer it.

“Why? Because you're attractive and your smart and-”

“Why haven't you used the content of the files as leverage? I've been digging at you for the last half hour, and you have plenty of ammunition to throw back at me, yet you haven't. Why?”

For the first time in a while, you were speechless.

“Oh. Wow. Should I have said something? Would you have felt more comfortable if I were a horrible person using your background to make you feel vulnerable?”

“Why, Y/N?”

You sighed and looked back up at him.

“I'm interested in you. That's it. Honestly, there is nothing in your file more interesting than how you look running your hands through your hair.”

His jaw clenched and unclenched before he let out a sigh.

“So you're a compulsive liar.” He said it so finitely it was like a kick in the teeth.

“Or maybe you're just insecure. I can help with that.”

He shot you another warning look as a grin spread over your lips. Yes, it was very fun to mess with Spencer Reid.

“FBI Agents aren't allowed to sleep with suspects.”

“You want to sleep with me?”

His eyes went wide as he realized his mistake, mouth opening and closing as he tossed another annoyed look in your direction.

The door to the interrogation room opened, and Reid quickly bolted out of his seat as Aaron Hotchner entered. The two men shared a nod before the younger man left the room entirely.

“Such a shame, I thought we were really getting somewhere.”

To your surprise, Hotchner’s lips curled up in a laugh as he sat down, straightening his suit.

“Miss Y/N, we've reviewed the information you've given us and taken into account your motives, and the FBI has decided not to prosecute you for your actions.”

You sat for a minute, Hotch doing the same, the both of you caught waiting for each other to say something or continue.

“But?” You prodded, knowing there was more left to say.

“But, we'd ask for your cooperation on cases in the future that require technological man-power. In a consultancy role, of course. You wouldn't be given a badge or a gun or any clearance, and you'd need to be with an agent at all times.”

You tapped your fingers against the desk, trying to figure out if this deal was beneficial or not.

“I'll do it if I can pick the Agent.”

Now, the man was fully smiling at you or giving you what you assumed passed for a smile in his books.

“We had recommended Doctor Reid for the role. Of course, if you're more comfortable with another agent, you can-”

“Doctor Reid is perfect, thank you.”

The man nodded and stood, and you stood with him as he led you quietly out of the room.

A flustered Spencer Reid exited the adjoining room, hurrying to catch Hotch before he really signed his life away to you.

“Hotch, what is this?” He demanded, stopping the man in his tracks. They both paused, turning around and moved a few feet awaywfrom.you whispering out their argument.

You couldn't catch most of it, but you did happen to catch the phrases “man-eater,” “I'm not good with people,” and “Spencer, this will be good for you.” Victory in the end went to Hotch, who promptly turned on his heel and kept walking down the hall.

“I work here now,” you said, grinning up at Spencer.

“No, you don't.”

“According to your boss, I do. And you're my babysitter.”

“You're a criminal. You hacked into the FBI database to leave ominous clues to multiple murders.”

“If you call those ominous clues, I'm curious how people usually flirt with you.”

“They don't. Why…why are we having this conversation?”

He stormed off ahead of you, and you quickened your pace to catch up to him, following him down a familiar hallway to what was obviously tech central at the BAU.

“Spencer, seriously? You're walking around looking like that, and no one hits on you?”

He stopped abruptly, and you ran into his back before he turned around to scowl at you again.

“Can we keep this serious, please?”

“I'm very serious about flirting with you, and I'm stumped why more people aren't.”

“Okay, let's go somewhere and talk,” his hand landed on your waist, readying his grip to forcibly move you if need be.

“I thought that's what we were doing.” Instead of allowing him to move you, you leaned into his touch, stepping closer and raising a hand to his chest, as his head dipped to maintain eye contact.

“No, this isn't talking, this is some weird foreplay I've never heard of, and I'd like you to leave my office if you're going to continue,” the woman sat at the desk exclaimed, horror and amusement fighting a battle for her facial expressions. “I like to keep my office a no trauma zone, so please take a walk to the nearest bed or storage closet or car and you can shove your tongues down each other's throats in peace and out of my sight, please and thank you.”

Spencer tried to step away, but a hand on his tie kept him close and kept his eyes on you. You poked your head out around him and smiled at the other woman.

“Sorry to disturb you. I'm Y/N. Based on the tech, I assume we will be working with each other soon.”

“Oh my gosh, you were, like, my number one most hated person last week. Penelope Garcia, tech analyst.”

“I'm sorry about that. If it makes it any better, it was really hard to get past some of your firewalls. And I couldn't even touch the classified files.”

“Apology accepted, on the condition that you lead young Reid out of my office right now before he explodes.”

You grinned and grabbed the man's hand, sending Penelope a quick goodbye as you pulled him out of the room.

He stumbled behind you for a few moments before catching up and pulling you in a different direction, keeping your hands intertwined as he bee-lined for the elevators and pushed the button to go down.

It arrived, and he pulled you in, not releasing your grip until the doors were fully closed and you were alone.

“Getting me all alone, Doc? What do you have in mind?”

“I'm driving you home.”

“My apartment is a crime scene, and I have no family in the city.”

“What about friends?”

“I've been stalked by a homicidal police officer for the last month and barricaded myself into an apartment. Do you think I have friends?”

His gaze was somewhat softer as he looked at you again. You saw the math happening in his head as he tried to figure out what to do with you. You also saw his brain short circuiting when you wrapped yourself around his arm.

“We're friends now, Doc. Isn't that right?”

“What?”

“We're friends,” you repeated again, tone becoming a little defensive in a pout.

“We are not friends, Y/N. We've known each other for less than 6 hours, and we haven't engaged in any friendly conversation.”

“We've known each other for two weeks, and I've been more than friendly enough for the both of us.”

The elevator stopped, and the doors opened. Gesturing for you to go first, Spencer hurried you out of the elevator and into the parking garage.

“Trust me, Spencer, deep down, part of you really wants to be friends with me,” you said poking his chest with a finger. You couldn't resist flattening your hand against his surprisingly hard chest and letting the hand drop slightly.

“And an ever deeper down part of you doesn't want to be friends at all,” you smiled at him.

He caught your wrist before it could reach his belt buckle, your unconscious finish line, spinning you around and dragging you to his car.

The biting cold of metal cutting into your wrists was the first indication that maybe Spencer Reid wasn't as easy to mess with as you'd hoped. He closed the handcuffs around your wrists and handed you into the car as you gaped at him.

“Spencer!”

“Doctor Spencer Reid.”

“I’m not a criminal, Spencer, let me go.”

“I'll let you go when you prove to me you can behave.”

You pouted as he strapped you into the car and closed the door, walking around to the passenger side before letting himself in.

“What's next? Are you going to gag me?” You scoffed as he turned over the engine and began backing out of the parking lot.

“No. I think you'd enjoy that too much.”

The drive to Spencer's apartment was long and quiet as you sat pouting in the passenger seat. Every few seconds, you twisted and moved your arms, fidgeting left and right so he could see how much the restraints bothered you. Luckily, he'd handcuffed your hands in front of your body, so you still sat somewhat comfortably, but you didn't want him to know that.

He pulled up to the building and turned off the engine, pulling out his keys.

“Let's go,” he said, not even sparing you a look as he climbed out.

“Spencer, I'm handcuffed. How do I even get out?”

“You'll figure it out. You're a smart girl, right?”

He closed his door and began walking, and you quickly fumbled your way out.

“Spencer… Spencer, your neighbours are going to ask questions about you bringing a handcuffed girl into your apartment!” You whispered at him as you paced behind him, somehow running to catch up with his mere walk.

“I don't have neighbours like you, Y/N. They won't notice a thing.”

“Right, okay. And when you murder a dozen people over a six month period, they won't hack the federal government.” You rolled your eyes as he unlocked the door, taking your arm and finally handing you into the apartment.

It was dark and cold, and you shivered, feeling his body pushed in right behind yours, closing the door before he felt around for the light switch.

When the lights turned on, you blinked, adjusting to the light again as he walked you further into the apartment, hands on your hips as you slowly stumbled forward.

“Can you take the handcuffs off now?” You asked, looking over your shoulder at him.

“And let you touch my things? No.”

You shook off his hands and walked further into the room.

“You know I can still mess with your stuff with my hands tied up like this,” you said, walking to the nearest bookshelf.

“Whoops, look at that,” you said, pulling a book off the shelf and letting it fall to the floor between you with a thud.

“Y/N!” He exclaimed, voice pitched up in exasperation.

“Oh, this stack of books on the ground looks well organized. Oopsie!” You acted out tripping over the books, sending them flying in different directions.

“One more time, Y/N, mess with my stuff one more time-”

You didn't hear the words as you pulled yet another book off his shelf and let it tumble to the ground.

He was on you in seconds, lifting your wrists and pinning them to the top shelf, pressing his body against yours as he stretched you out.

You gasped at both the sudden contact and the tight grip he now had on your hands.

“Tell me, do you actually want to be in control, or do you just think you should want to be in control?”

“What's the difference?”

“The difference is how much you enjoy it. I think you're only being a brat to get a rise out of me. You're doing this because there's no one else in your life that will give you exactly what you crave."

"And what would that be?"

"Attention," he whispered into your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

“Great, thanks for the therapy. Are you going to show me how much I can enjoy relinquishing control now?”

“Brat,” he spat at you.

“Fed,” you spat back.

“You have a problem with law enforcement?” He asked, his breath hitting your ear as you tried not to shiver again at his touch.

“My neighbour was a serial killer whose day job was police brutality," you said, as if the answer was obvious, but Spencer still stared, waiting for true confirmation.

“Yes I have a problem with law enforcement. What, are you going to spank me?”

His eyes lit up, and you suddenly wondered if you'd made a mistake.

“You'd like that, wouldn't you?”

“N-No.” You stuttered, but he'd already begun moving you over to his couch.

“It was a joke. Spencer, it was a joke, don't-”

You underestimated his strength as he flipped you around and guided you down over his lap. Keeping your hips raised, he used one hand to hold you down while the other pushed up your tight skirt.

“S-Spencer, I really don't think-”

“Then don't think,” he said, bringing his hand down hard on your ass as you cried out in shock and pain.

“Stop thinking. You think too much, let me do it for you.”

With each hit, your shock grew fuzzy, melting into pleasure as you felt wetness pooling between your thighs.

The doctor you thought would be an easy target was not sadistically returning every teasing word back to you with his hands, letting bruises blossom all over your ass as he delivered painfully arousing strikes.

His hand stopped and he rubbed your ass as you twitched at the gentleness, panties sticking to the folds of your cunt as you absent mindedly pushed up into his touch.

“See, now you're listening,” he said, fingers trailing down to touch you over the sopping undergarments.

With two quick fingers, the crotch of your panties peeled away from your skin and he was plunged deep inside you, fingers pressing in as his thumb found its way to your clit.

“Fuck, Spencer-”

“Doctor Reid. You can use my full title now or you don't get to cum.”

“D-Doctor Reid, please!” His thumb rubbed slowly over your clit bit his fingers didn't move as you shuddered and contracted around them.

“Please what?” He asked, voice light as if he wasn't two knuckles deep in you already.

“Please make me cum, Doctor Reid!”

“Good manners,” he said as he finally began pumping his digits in and out of you, spreading your legs wider as you clawed your hands into his couch cushions to ground yourself in the moment. His spare hands left your wrists, and you felt them again, delivering small, almost cute hits to your ass as you twitched around his fingers, shying away from the painful contact.

“That's it, Y/N, let yourself relax,” he whispered, shifting his weight underneath you as you became aware of the tent in his pants.

Your brain was jello as you tried to bounce back on his fingers, chasing your oncoming orgasm.

“Look at you, trying to cum on my hands. You're just an attention-seeking slut, right?”

His fingers continued ppimg as your tongue hung loosely in your mouth.

“Answer me, or I'll leave you here high and dry, Y/N. Tell me you're an attention seeking slut that's been fingering yourself to the thought of this for weeks.”

“I-I'm an a-atten…tion seeking s-slut,” you stifled a moan and bit back tears as he pressed another finger inside of you. “Spencer I can't I need to cum,” you cried, tears spilling down your cheeks pathetically.

“Say it.”

“I'm an attention seeking s-slut that's been th-thinking about this-”

“Fingering yourself,” he corrected.

“Fingering myself to the thought of this for w-weeks,” you cried, sniffing now as your thighs shook in anticipation.

“What a nasty little slut,” he said as you finally came, your cum running down his fingers as he kept his hands moving.

Your tears were falling freely now as you bit back little sobs and chokes of emotions, the pleasure from the orgasm almost too much to handle.

Underneath you, Spencer shifted, freeing himself from his position and laying you fully down on the sofa as your legs still shook.

“There once was a doctor called Reid,” he said, unzipping his pants as he took up his place behind you.

They were your words, and your body signalled warnings everywhere as his hands pulled your hips up once more, pulling your knees up too to bend under you, laying you face down ass up.

“Who I simply and truly just need.”

He pulled the panties down to the crook of your knees before leaning down over you so he could deliver the next few lines as whispers into your ear.

“I would lie on my back, And then let him attack, Any inch of my body with his seed.”

A weak moan escaped your lips as he sank his cock inside of you, lips still pressed against your ears.

“I don't want you on your back, though. I much prefer you like this.”

His cock slid out of you and returned with a speed and strength that had your eyes rolling back in your head.

He was thick, maybe a little longer than average, and he filled you perfectly using your cum as lubricant.

“Such a good listener, now, Y/N. I like you like this,” he said with a moan, thrusting hard and deep inside of you.

You didn't talk. You could only drool and moan into his couch as he emptied your brain one thrust at a time.

You didn't think about how he wasn't wearing a condom. You didn't think about how he'd spat your words back at you, ready to fill you with his seed. You just sat in a pool of your own pleasure and let Spencer Reid use your body as you'd been begging him to for weeks.

He raised your hips and gave one last thrust, stilling there for a second as he filled your empty body and mind with his cum and his entire being.

If you weren't obsessed with Doctor Spencer Reid before this, you certainly were now.

He pulled out of you quickly, wiping his cock on your skirt before hurrying off to the bathroom to clean up.

Your brain was still absent when he returned, cleaning you off and finally removing the handcuffs. He removed your clothes, replacing them with his spares as he threw the soiled ones into the wash.

When you regained your wits or what was left of them, you were laid out in his bed, wrapped in a blanket and stuffed into a sweater and sweats, fully covered from head to toe. Spencer was picking up his keys and trying his shoelaces.

“Where are you going?’ You asked sleepily, stumbling to the doorway. Your legs were still shaky, and your movement was already limited. You knew that tomorrow, the use of your limbs would be nonexistent.

“Back to the office. Now that you're not around, maybe I'll be able to get some actual work done.”

“Spencer,” you said, forcing him to turn around to look back at you.

Before he could say anything else, you pressed your lips to his, hot and needy, wrapping your arms around his neck as he kissed back, slipping his tongue into your mouth and pressed you into the wall next to the door.

When you both pulled away for breath, you detangled your limbs, smoothing out his shirt and readjusting his tie.

He looked down at you, waiting for you to say something else as you met his gaze, grinning at him.

“I look forward to working with you, Doctor Reid.”

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid smut #mgg #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid criminal minds #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n

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kooahae · 1 year ago

Text

AFTER LAST NIGHT

Summary: After catching your current boyfriend cheating on you. You do what you always do- run to your childhood best friend Jeon Jungkook to ask him about a way to confront your partner, What you don’t know is that Jungkook has been thinking about something( someone) a bit more than usual and this couldn’t have been better news for him, for both of you. MINORS DNI

Pairing:best friend to lovers, Jungkook X female reader

Warnings:cursing, arguing, cheating (not JK), a little angst, fluff, some self-reflection, toxic partner, Oc, and Jk are very raw and honest with each other. SMUT Oral ( f. Receiving) Unprotected sex (pls don’t this, just don’t.) F*ngering, praising, big d!ck JK, overstim, tummy bulging mentioned, he finishes inside, sq***ting…tbh you’ve been warned it’s pretty smutty but it’s super sweet.

word count:9,656

Read the next part/drabble here

“Hey, honey I will be home late tonight after work, Don’t wait up!”

Seojun yelled from outside your bedroom, which means yet another morning waking up alone in bed. It’s always like this. Seojun and you have been together for a year and a half but he feels more like a stranger than ever.

How?

Time changes things. There were just way too many problems and it felt like all of them came from him. You know you played your part, but it never amounted to the same weight of issues he caused. He never tried to meet you halfway. You simply compromise, or you both argue until someone decides to take the couch. Again, it wasn’t always like this. He used to take you on dates, take photos of you, and invite you to his company dinners. He was really a good guy at first.

The two of you started dating towards the fall semester of your junior year in college. He was a year older, so he was always showing you around in your prior academic years before you started dating. Your mutual friend Namjoon, helped the two of you grow close. Interesting that now it feels like the most distant you’ve been with anyone in your life, and that says a lot because you’re not the most extroverted person. Somehow, you let him in. You thought you had so much in common and it turns out you were wrong. Everyone around you could see how stressful and draining being with him was for you as time progressed, yet you always defended it.

So, as you readjusted the pillow and looked up at the ceiling, you thought about how living here was becoming one of the worst things you’ve ever decided to do. The ugly truth? it was second to being in this relationship. This is not for the weak, especially when the person you love, isn’t the person you lay next to every night, and that’s if he’s even home. It’s not that Seojun is a bad person, he just isn’t him.

Your childhood best friend, Jeon Jungkook. Bless him and those sparkly eyes. He has always been a sweet soul. Simply put, He was your everything. If you had it your way -and didn’t feel like it would jeopardize your relationship as friends- you would’ve acted on it a long time ago. It’s not that you didn’t love Seojun; quite the contrary you loved him, but you weren’t in love with him anymore. You started thinking about the first time you knew you’d rather be with Jungkook. Yes, you always liked him but this was different. Last year’s beach trip with your friends, Seojun made the BIGGEST FUCKING SCENE. It was all over you having a drink-no you weren’t drunk - Yes, he’s controlling. He ended up leaving early because Jungkook stepped in. It was nice to have someone defend you like that, he always has. That’s when you realized you were falling out of love with Seojun, and that your heart still longed for Jungkook. You tried everything in your power to spice up your relationship but it just kept declining and now..here you are.

As you got up to brush your teeth and wash your face, you felt a little bitter. You lived with Jungkook up until you moved in with your boyfriend, You used to love walking into the kitchen, breakfast being cooked, and Bam waiting for you. You even liked the mornings when it was you who had to do the cooking, just to see that smile of his.

You walked into your kitchen with no Bam or Jungkook in sight- but you knew what you gave up when you moved here. You just didn’t know how much you would miss it.

As you take a look into the fridge you notice he apparently forgot it was his turn to go grocery shopping. Go figure. you decide cereal for breakfast it is. You scoffed grabbing the cereal first. You can’t believe Seojun is a milk-first person, like Seriously? What do you even have in common with him at this point?

Your phone’s ringtone ripped you out of the ‘Seojun and I: pros and cons’ battle you have found yourself doing in the morning. You flipped your phone over to see who it was and happily answered the incoming phone call.

“There she is!”

“Jiminie, why are you always this excited in the morning?”

“ I’m not, you and I both know this. I happen to like my bestie though. Go shopping with me and Hobi!” Your older brother, and best friend in one person... He’s being annoying but it’s honestly Jimin, there was no harm done here. Your older brother always cared for you too, which is why you’re so close to him. He is and has always been one of your comfort places, along with Jungkook.

“I don’t have anything else better to do, What time?”

Jimin pursed his lips as he contemplated what time he should pick you up. “The next hour, so be ready!”

“Okay. Is Jungkook coming?” You said trying not to sound too defeated.

“No, he thinks you hate him because you haven’t texted him back these last two weeks. I’ve talked to your best friend more than you. I know Kook is a family friend, but speaking to him this much about you in particular is killing me.” Now this one- again, no harm done here. A little bitter feeling from your side, but only because you knew he was right.

Damn, that might be a new record for you. You’ve only ignored Jungkook four days straight before- and at that time you were in the eighth grade. He still apologizes to this day for breaking your snow globe. Even buys you one for Christmas every year now because he felt so bad. Have you really not said anything to him in two weeks?

‘Seojun could never be better than JK, you would not have to choose’ Jimin had once said. Again, he was right.

You eventually freed yourself from your thoughts.

“Jimin, you and I both know, I do not hate him.” You said to your brother.

“Then text him back.” And with that, he hung up.

You decided to get dressed in a basic crop tee, some baggy jeans, and your favorite pair of sneakers. You made sure to put your hair into a half up, half down with your claw clip. Grabbed your purse and then pulled it across your body. Checking for touch-ups and spraying your favorite perfume- the one Jungkook bought you seven of because it’s just ‘soooo hard’ for you to find. Another pinging sound ripped you from your thoughts. The doorbell chime going off nonstop. why are Jimin and Hobi so extra?!

“Hi. I heard the doorbell the first time” You said as you pulled the door open to be greeted by two bright smiles.

“These are for you,” Jimin said, as he handed you flowers.

“Tiger lilies, Really?” The confusion on your face lasted for all of three seconds. You could guess what they were for. Still, you asked. “You know it’s not my birth flower, What are these for?”

“Duh. Jungkook made us bring them, he said ‘Please stop ignoring me’ or some shit like that.” Hobi stated. Jimin nodded his head to agree.

As your finger traced a petal you spoke “He is Mr. Please love me. Fitting”

Looking at the flowers reminded you of something his mom used to say to you ‘Never underestimate Jungkook’s ability to make you feel special, Never underestimate his ability to make sure you think about him either. That’s the type of person my son is.’ You miss her too. You Should ask when you can grab lunch soon. Once you stop ignoring her son, the person who you love more than anyone else. Yanno…your best friend.

“I’m gonna go put these in some water and we can go.” You said as you tried to calm down your heartbeat.

How can he make you blush and he isn’t even here? Why can’t Seojun make you feel like this anymore?

You walked back out to your brother and hobi. Trying to

act as normal as possible. You’re really missing him right now. You know you do and apparently so does everyone around you.

“You’re incredibly down bad for each other. Losers.” Hobi just had to be the first to say something about it.

“Aren’t they hyung? It’s so cute.” -and apparently Jimin just had to follow up.

Annoying.

“Ooh that one, Jungkook would like that one! Wouldn’t he Chim Chim?” You asked. Your eyes bright as ever, as you looked at the light projector.

“____ he already has how many of these?” His eyebrow raised at you.

“But does he have this one?! I don’t think so. Hobi you agree right?”

“You know what happened last time we brought Jungkook on a shopping trip? He wouldn’t stop running his mouth about you either. Which is why, you have to stop before we no longer invite you.” Hobi said as he teased you.

“Whatever, you guys are being haters. I’m gonna buy it!” You said flashing a smile, as you made your way to the purchasing counter.

Once you were all checked out and got it gift-wrapped for him you smiled proudly to yourself. “I’m the greatest friend ever.” You said rejoining them

“You are but…you’re also a simp, just a cute one.” Your older brother grinned, patting your head.

“Anyway, we should go to the food court! I want some sprite.” Hobi said and you agreed- mostly because that bowl of cereal just didn’t do it for you this morning.

As you sat with them at the food table, you noticed them both staring at you.

“Can I help you?” You asked raising your eyebrows

“How’s your relationship?” Hobi asks you out of nowhere.

-and that’s the question you always hate... Not because it’s going well but because your response is always a lie when you say

“Going good.”

Jimin rolled his eyes and scoffed. “You’re lying and we know… because we know you. What’s going on? And yes I know something is up.”

“Well, it’s just that, when it started I thought it was great but now…”

“Now?” Hobi said as he leaned in more to pay attention as much as he could.

“Now I feel like I’m just sleeping with a shell. We don’t hate each other or anything. We just don’t go on dates or cuddle and it’s because he’s busy. I don’t want to be a brat about it. So… I’m just trying to be supportive.” As you stare at the people listening to you, you know you have to make it sound as good as possible. “But SeoJun will be back to normal I’m sure of I-“

“No. No. No…What do you mean you don’t go on dates? Isn’t he off every weekend? just like you.” Jimin did not look happy as the words poured from his mouth. You get it. You’re Jimin’s younger sister so for him, this is personal.

“Exactly, Who doesn’t take a hot girl like you on a date whenever they can?” Hobi asked as he chomped down on his fries in front of him. Jimin would have said something to his friend, but he’s been dealing with having a baby sister everyone likes forever. Plus, it’s Hobi. He’s what Jungkook is to you, to Jimin- minus the whole ‘madly in love with each other’ thing. Really good childhood friends.

“Guys, he is just really busy. That’s why.” You don’t even know why you’re defending him but again, it’s routine at this point.

“Busy doing what?” Hobi questioned.

“I don’t know. Work or something. He just says don’t wait up. And I don’t. No hard feelings, yanno?” As you went to reach for your drink. You noticed Jimin had already pulled it away from you.

“When’s the last time you slept on a couch ?” Jimin asked angrily. Jimin just like Jungkook, sometimes didn’t hold back. Today was one of those days.

“Jimin!” You raised your voice slightly and snatched your drink back.

“The fucking couch??!” Hobi just gave you that look he always gives Jungkook when he is being ..well when Jungkook is being himself, but you know when you get that look-He’s shaming you.

“Hobi, it’s not me who usually takes the couch, I don’t take it all the time. I took the couch like 4 times.” You couldn’t even make eye contact with them. It’s probably been double but you’re the type to remove yourself if he won’t. You hate yelling. It isn’t effective communication, but neither is the couch so you’re not sure why you just scaled it down like that. You just don’t want to worry your brother and Hobi.

“Shouldn’t be dating a dumbass who would have you there instead of himself.” Jimin just wouldn’t let up. You knew it came from a good place, so you redirected the conversation.

“Guys, let’s just continue shopping okay..” you asked but somewhat told them so that they backed off. Seems they both got the hint.

“Thanks again for inviting me guys. I needed some outside time, oh and I’ll drive next time!” You say as Hobi gives you a thumbs up.

“I’m walking you to the door, Come on.” Jimin must want to talk. You loathe when he does this. A Jimin lecture for you is worse than him yelling at you because this means he’s absolutely right about something and he knows that you know it too.

Once you have arrived at your door, you feel Jimin staring into the back of your skull. In his defense-You’re a big part of his heart. A sister and a best friend. One who always cares about people, and expects nothing in return. You’re pure that way. So watching you be okay with this just isn’t, and hasn’t been sitting well with him. He’s tried not to get involved because he understands his baby sister, isn’t a baby. But this is getting out of hand.

“Listen, I didn’t mean to out your business ____ but you have got to stop letting him treat you like this. Even if some people don’t know. I do, Hobi knows, hell even Yoongi asks if you’re still together and why. You know he doesn’t like to pry. That should say something on it owns. You know who else knows? that person you keep dodging. Maybe texting him would do you some good. You know Jungkook has wanted nothing more than you happy his whole life. ” Jimin said, his face extremely serious. Why is he acting like you don’t know this already?

“Jimin, SeoJun is trying. I promise.” You exhaled and put your hand on his shoulder. Youre not doing good with your attempt at reassuring him. You can tell.

“No, he isn’t. If he was explain to me why today- a Saturday- he couldn’t spend time with you. Does he usually work Saturdays? Because this seems new to me. You know Namjoon works at the same office as him? No one is there today but magically he is. I know you may not want to be with Jungkook anymore or gave up on your crush. We know it sucks, and life takes us in different directions - but at least find someone who treats you closely to how he does. You deserve it. I love you.” He said as he planted a kiss on your forehead.

You nod and hug him and as he makes his way back down the stairs he makes sure he yells “Text him!”

“Love you too chim.” You sighed as you unlocked your apartment door.

Maybe you should go check on Seojun, he could be under a lot of stress and you’re sure with the way you two have been bickering it’s not helping. Maybe you play a bigger role in this than you think you do.

You decided on bringing him some food, checking the time to see that it was 2:45. If you start now you could have his food to him by 4:00, which is still a good time.

As you pack the Tupperware with all the food you’ve made, you end up taking time to check social media before heading out.

Jungkook posted a picture of his video game screen. That was it. You check in every time you get a chance. Just to see that he is well. Maybe Jimin and Hobi are right, Just text him, he didn’t even do anything wrong. Your boyfriend is just insecure about you and Jungkook’s friendship, but surely he didn’t deserve to be ghosted. Especially when you would rather be with him anyway. You would have told your brother and friend this earlier while out, but you just couldn’t.

You grabbed your keys and headed to your car. The drive to his workplace felt unfamiliar. Has it really been that long? The question Jimin asked earlier still burning in your mind. When would he make time for you? Why is he working on a Saturday? You had way too many thoughts about him at this moment- all of them unsettling.

Finally, you arrived at your destination -SeoJun’s office. you can’t help but smile seeing more than one car. Maybe Jimin was wrong. He could really just need to catch up on work.

You approached the door, entered your boyfriend’s entry code, and walked towards the elevator. with each ting of the elevator, you felt a bit more excitement. Seojun hopefully would be happy to see you too. That would motivate you to try to do this more often, you thought to yourself. That would motivate you to put more into falling in love with him again.

The elevator finally stops on his floor, and your feet lead you closer to his office space. From where you’re standing, The door looks cracked which is different for him. He’s always been the type to need absolute silence and space, but then again there’s just one other person here.

Wait a minute… Is that moaning?

He does say he works with interesing people, but porn at work is just absurd. There’s no way anyone could be that bold. Insanity…

exhaling deeply, calming yourself, and continuing walking. Just to see your worst fear once you approached the door.

“Right there… seojun!”

Is that his assistant ??

The same one he allegedly fired MONTHS AGO. The same one who you told him was mean and wouldn’t allow you entry before saying “Seojun wouldn’t be with anyone like you.” The reason you had even been given the entry code incase she gave you attitude It all made sense. The late nights at work were simply not late nights at work. They were late-nights spent cheating. All the times you waited up, because you were trying to save your relationship. How the fuck could he do this to you? He even wore the blazer you purchased for him when he first got employed to work this morning. What about you? What were you doing wrong? Matterfact, Why the fuck are you blaming yourself?

You dropped the food in your hand as your tears began to well up. So much for Saturday’s at work, So much for trying on your end. Scratch what you said earlier, Seojun is a bad person. You needed to get out of here and so you turned kicking the food as you did, hearing your partner’s mistake speak once last time while you hurried and moved from his sight line.

“Is someone in the office Seojun?” Her voice irritating the life out of you.

“It’s probably just the janitor and it’ll make him think twice before looking at my girl if he see’s me fucking her. Won’t it?” you could hear the chuckle underneath his voice.

HIS GIRL?!! Where is she when he doesn’t feel good and starts acting like a damn toddler? She doesn’t wake up early on Mondays to iron his clothes and prep his food like you do. Has she met his mother and had to deal with her bullshit? That woman is a drag. Staying with him is a drag. All the things you’ve endured..for this. For nothing.

His girl…that’s the last thing you heard, and It fucking sucked that everyone was right about him.

As you stepped into the elevator your tears just wouldn’t stop flowing down. Maybe it’s because you know you’ve been playing happy for no reason. To be betrayed. He didn’t have one bit of decency about it either. He could have broken up with you by now…how could he continue to watch you try and make you feel like you weren’t good enough just to do this to you?

You need a hug.

You need Jungkook.

You made your way back to your car, unlocked it, and put your phone on hands-free to dial Jungkook’s number. Except he didn’t answer. You have done it this time. Ignoring the one person who cares about you for what? Seojun?

You finally reached your house and put your keys on the kitchen counter. You walked further inside to wash your tear-stained cheeks, and that’s when you heard a specific ringtone come through.

My #1 🥳🩶 : Did you really call? Did you like the flowers? Do you still hate me? For whatever reason you hate me? Without explaining? Were you calling to curse me out and finally tell me why? because I’m not ready for that. You’re kind of scary when you’re angry. I love you tho. I miss you. Im sorry for whatever i did

You hadn’t replied in over two weeks, you deserved however many questions he asked at this point

You couldn’t help but smile as you felt tears welling up, yet again. He is your superhero, you know you shouldn’t have ignored him.

Then your phone began to ring. “No, I don’t hate you. No you didn’t do anything !” You yelled as fast as you could. Jungkook needed to know he wasn’t the problem. You made sure you told people when things weren’t their fault. Unlike someone you know you don’t mind letting people know things aren’t their fault .

“Good, that’s literally the one thing in life that would destroy me!” Jungkook’s smile and calmness can be felt through a phone. That’s also something you love so much about him.

“What? Someone hating you?”

“No- you hating me. I couldn’t live with myself like that.”

“I’ll never hate you, and I never hated you. Can I come over? I know I owe you an apology”

“Of course, you used to live here. You used to pop up randomly too. You don’t have to ask.” His sweet soothing voice spoke through the phone.

“I never know if you could have company or anything and I-“

“I’d make them leave even if I did…” He said cutting you off. “You’re more important to me.”

There goes your heart doing somersaults.

“I’m sorry kookie, I shouldn’t have just ignored you for two weeks.”

“You drove me insane, I’ll admit it but I’m just really fucking happy to hear your voice. Bring a bathing suit. Let’s have food, watch some bad documentaries, and swim in the hot tub. Like we used to.”

Another thing about Jungkook that’s so special. That sheer excitement to be bored with you as opposed to being bored alone.

“Can I stay the night?” You ask, not knowing you have just made Jungkook’s heart flutter 10X the speed it does on a normal day

“Yes of course ___ ! Bam is gonna be so excited! We will see you when you get here, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You say back and then you hear the line disconnect.

Once you’re done packing your stuff, you make sure to grab the gift you bought him earlier and head to Jungkook’s for the night. You contemplate texting Seojun but decide not to. He just shouldn’t be in the way. He shouldn’t be in your way any longer.

The drive felt like forever as you tried to keep your composure but every red light felt like more time to think about what you saw, and with that comes realizing although the cheating hurts and feels like hell- nothing feels worse than the fact for the last two weeks, 14 whole days you put Jungkook on the back burner. All because Seojun asked you to. You listened to everything he said without considering yourself- just to walk in on him fucking someone else. You also start thinking about how you fell in love with the idea of him. You have been denying your happiness for someone who was pretending to be the hardest worker of the year. Probably presented himself as single to his coworkers besides Namjoon, who would have told your brother. Sneaking behind your back for that relationship with his little personal assistant Emma the whole fucking time. -Personal assistant my foot!

You finally reach Jungkook’s place and walk to the door of the penthouse, entering the passcode- it’s still your birthday for the code. Jungkook always said he chooses things he likes as passcodes, no matter how silly you told him it was.

The door opens and you hear barking, meaning you need to get a treat for someone else you’ve been neglecting. Bam immediately found you as soon as you reached for one but instead of trying to get to the treat he just whined at your feet. You’ve been a bad friend to him too.

“Hey hey, I’m sorry boy! I didn’t think about how this would be for you. How is my favorite dog!?” You said squatting down to pet his head and behind his ears.

“Geez and here I thought you came over for me��What the hell are your eyes so red for?” Jungkook said tilting his head.

You swallowed and shook your head no. So, he held out his arms. “Come here princess, what happened?” He asked once more.

“He’s a fucking cheater, and the worst part is- I didn’t confront him.” You said as you let Jungkook wrap his arms around you. You’ve missed his warmth not just physically but his aura. He’s your sunlight in a sense.

“Fuck, that’s rough. I’m sorry. I’ll do my best to cheer you up today. Today you’re the only person who matters, not him, not whoever he was cheating with. You want to talk about it?”

You nodded your head yes “Let me change first, You said we were getting in the hot tub?”

He nodded once more and kissed your forehead. Why does it always feel so good when he does that?

Once you’ve finished changing, You pet Bam one more time and make your way outside. Jungkook is shirtless in front of the grill cooking what smells like the most delicious meat ever. You realize you’ve missed coming here after a long day of work and watching movies with him. You’ve missed someone even taking the time out of their day to do something for you.

“Steak, Ramyun, veggies, and Highballs!” He says grinning at you.

“You are the cutest person alive.” You mumble. Not knowing Jungkook heard that too and he hurriedly turned around so you didn’t see him blush.

He closes the top of the grill as the meat cooks climbs onto the bench surrounding the hot tub, and looks directly into your eyes.

“You wanted to talk, and Therapist JK is here to listen!” He says

As you start to recap the events of your day with Jungkook, He feels absolutely horrible. How could he have not been there to protect you? What person cheats on you anyway? Seojun is a fucking dumbass.

“..And the worst part is too, I tried even when I Knew I was falling out of love with him because I just couldn’t see myself giving up on him. I’m such a dummy.”

“You’re not dumb for trying to see the good in someone, maybe the act of looking for something that doesn’t exist in him was dumb- seeing it in him of all people. You know I never liked him - but you’re not dumb.” He says and takes a sip of his drink and you do the same.

“Why are you being such a good friend to me?” You ask.

“Because I always want to be good to you. Even if you ignore me,” then gets up to check on the meat he prepared.

You and Jungkook have been outside for hours just talking and watching the sun go down til he decided you should actually get in the hot tub.

“The water feels so nice. Relaxing. Why would I ever have moved away when you got this damn hot tub?” You ask and look at him through your half-lidded eyes. The highballs slightly affecting you

“The hot tub should be the last reason you want to stay here..”

Jungkook pulled you by your arm closer to him and you wrapped your arms around his neck due to the speed in which he did. This wasn’t unusual just because Jungkook has always been touchy with you, but there’s so much tension.

“Oh yeah, Bam should be reason number one. You’re right.” You giggle and Jungkook just smiles. He loves the sound of your laugh. He always knew how to get one out of you too. That made him feel really good about himself, Every time he hears it, he swears he wants to reach into his chest and hand you his heart, that still wouldn’t stop it from beating for you.

“Say I’m reason number one.” He says looking at you and you shake your head no and try to move away but he repeats himself. This time slower.

“_____…Say, I’m reason number one.” He is piercing through your soul with that gaze of his. So you do what he asks and tell him the truth.

“You’re number one.” Which causes his frown to turn into the prettiest smile you’ve ever seen. The little bit of light that has decided to shine hits his lip piercing. Who made him so pretty? Why the hell are you staring so hard at him? You know why but usually you would be able to look away, and right now it feels like you can’t. He isn’t holding onto you anymore but you feel stuck. He’s so…cute.

“Let’s drink some more!” You say and he nods.

“A little more but not too much more, The last time we got drunk bam probably wished he was human to tell us to stop laughing so loud.” He smiles at you, a slight little nose scrunch. God, you really wish he would stop doing that.

“Hey since you’re my number 1 reason, can you play some music for us?” You ask and he nods

“As long as I’m your number one, you can have whatever you like.” You can’t help but chuckle. Only if Jungkook knew what he was doing when he said stuff like this.

“You look like you’re foaming at the mouth,” he says to you as he sits across from you on the outside furniture. You’re now wearing his t-shirt over your bathing suit since the air is a little chillier. Jungkook cuts up extra meat since he’s taken notice of how hungry you look.

“Hobi ate most of the fries earlier.” You say

You should see yourself, a little tipsy, in his tee, face a little puffy and reddened because you’ve been drinking.

Jungkook thinks you’re cute.

“Eat as much as you want, I was just playing anyway.” He pushess a plate to you.

You smile and continue to make small talk until you ask him a question he didn’t see coming.

“Kook? How do I confront him ?”

Jungkook isn’t a violent guy, he swears! He tries his best not to resort to physical violence, but when you ask him this and he thinks about how red your eyes were when you walked in…the love of his life crying her eyes out, he simply states…

“You let me beat the fuck out of him.” As stone cold as can be.

You giggle “That is so mean! Seriously Kookie, help me?”

He raises an eyebrow “I’m not fucking joking.” His tone is more stern and serious than before, making you stop the slurping of your food and look at him.

“Kook..I’m not worth you fighting someone.” You try and argue.

“You’re right, you’re worth more than that. Which Is why you should let me beat the fuck out of him.” You don’t know why but it’s kinda hot watching Jungkook feel the need to protect you like this. Always has been.

For some reason, your mouth closes and you have nothing else to say. you try and think of a way to break the silence but nothing comes out.

“Can I ask you something that’s been weighing on me?” He asks looking at you from his side of the table.

“Sure. Anything. “ you say and reach for the highball.. but yet again today, someone has snatched your drink before you can even bring it to your mouth.seriously? Whats with everyone today?

“Didn’t you think that bam and I missed you? I know I’ve seen and heard from you, but you used to live here, why don’t you visit as much? And why did you ghost me for two weeks? You drove me insane. I know I said I was over it but it just…it just didn’t feel good.”

You swallow and it feels like the tension in the air has reached an all-time high.

“He doesn’t like the idea of me being here for too long. I don’t know …he was complaining and I thought I was fixing it.” You say looking down at your lap.

Jungkook is trying to remain cool but that just struck a nerve. He’s been here through everything. How could you do something like that? Instead, he asks another question.

“Do you miss living here____? You should move back” Your eyes meet his and you chuckle.

“He wouldn’t like that either, plus I haven’t even confronted -.”

“Stop,” he says and you drop your utensils onto your plate and look at him. He looks serious…Jungkook is pissed. You know it. You know that face anywhere.

“Stop what?”

“Defending or redirecting when we all mention him. It’s annoying as fuck actually. You caught him cheating on you today. Stop defending him and just …just answer my damn question.”

Ouch.

“Jungkook please don’t..”

“Don’t what?” He questions you as he sits back folding his arms. Then he decides to continue. “ If he is cheating on someone as beautiful as you, He’s the biggest fucking idiot in the world. I’d never do anything that dumb.”

Maybe he has had too many highballs.

“Duh Kookie! You’re not an idiot.” You say as you try to play it off.

“Stop playing dumb and Move back in.” He states and you can tell he wants you to but…

“Kook I can’t. That wouldn’t be something he would like. I told you already.”

“What do you like?” He’s really catching an attitude with you right now. You thought this night was going to be confrontation-free besides your apology, but you also know Jungkook hates being ignored. You did this to yourself.

He starts biting his inner cheek waiting for you to answer. So you decide to look up and question him instead.“Damn Jungkook, Why does this feel like an interview?”

You know that wasn’t fair, but Jungkook won’t let you escape. He’s made it clear he is the one asking the questions and getting answers tonight.

“Just because he suggested it doesn’t mean you have to do everything he fucking says. I miss when you were okay with being yourself. You’re prettier that way.” Jungkook sighed as he sipped the highball in his right hand. He still isn’t raising his voice either. He just won’t budge.

“I am okay with being myself!” You retorted.

Why is he so ballsy tonight?

“Nope. Lately…you aren’t. I haven’t seen you act on a single thing in that damn brain of yours in like 6 months. Especially if that dumbass of yours has a say.”

“Jeon Jungkook…you’re pushing it.”

“What? Mad someone is honest with you? I used to be able to do that.” He inched closer into your space and started to read your face. You knew he was right. So did he.

“How the fuck would you know what I’m thinking anyway?”

“I’ve known you your whole life. Why the fuck wouldn’t I know? You’ve also been eye-fucking me this whole time, In case you’re wondering what else I know. If it makes you feel better I wanna fuck you too. Really. Fucking. Bad. ” he said, taking another sip of his drink, raising his eyebrow and smirking.

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

“Stop choosing someone else when we both can choose each other. “ he continues.

“Jungkook I’m sorry but I don’t want to fight with you. I’ll just go. At least the fights at home, I know what I’m expecting.” Your breathing eratic because of how bold he is being. You stand to get up but Jungkook rushes to block the door that leads back inside the condo.

“You are home. ”

“Jungkook…” you say as you search his eyes.

“I’ll let you leave if that’s what you really want, I am not, however letting you leave this late, this dark, into the arms of a fucking cheater when I’ve been right here this whole fucking time!” He snaps some more at you looking into your eyes.

“You’re so..” You can’t even figure out where to begin. You know he is right…wait he’s been here the whole time. He is right.

“Fuck this.” He says and leans his head back. You watch his Adam’s apple bob and then when he looks back down at you, his tongue poking his cheek.

“Jungkook I’m sorry.” You reach to grab his face but he just uses his right arm to pin your arm above your head still holding you against the door.

“Nuh-uh. Tell me what you want.” He presses on and you damn near melt when he licks his lips and tilts his head while waiting on your response.

“You..” You finally say. Your eyes are glossy as you search hiss and since he hasn’t said anything, even though it’s only been a few seconds since you revealed the truth, You continue.

“I will never want anyone as much as you and I shouldn’t have even left. You’re right! You’re right! I’m so fucking sorry-“

Before you can even finish your apology, Jungkook lets your arm drop that he has been holding and places his hand on your neck bringing you closer to him and his lips envelope yours. So soft. So gentle but needy. Why do you feel like you’re on fire right now? As his tongue begs for entrance and you oblige, he pulls away just to say one thing to you.

“Thank you for apologizing. Now, let me show you how much I love you. ”

Jungkook never imagined your lips would be this soft. He’s thought about it, but this was better than any analogy his brain has come up with. This is better than any kiss he has had his whole life, it’s the same for you. This is what it’s like when it’s the right person.

All your moans and hums into his mouth that he desperately swallows. You’re perfect for each other. You feel it throughout his kisses.

“Jump.” He says

So you do. Wrapping your legs around his waist as he leads you into his condo.

“Say you’re coming home, and say you want me.” He won’t take no for an answer and you’ve confessed so you’re not really in a position to lie to him.

“I’m coming home, and I want you kook. Really. Fucking. Bad.”

He chuckles and kisses you some more. “ You definitely didn’t deny the eye fucking.” He says and you pull away.

“Take me to your room , and actually do it.” You whisper against his ear.

Soon you feel Jungkook placing you on his bed. The way he looks at you makes your heart stop, but you like it as much as you like him. You’re really in love with him.

Jungkook joins you. Climbing his way up to you. Watching your chest rise and fall, as you both stare into each other’s eyes. He wouldn’t want anyone more than you. He never has. You open your mouth slightly and Jungkook tilts his head in concern.

“I want you.” Your voice, barely a whimper.

He smiles slightly before saying “Took you long enough, I’d make you beg…but I want you too.” The way he has been so confident all night has been leaving you soaked. He resumes his assault on your lips, then makes his way down to your neck, finding your sweet spot.

“Fuck, that feels so good.” You moan out and he slides his hands up the borrowed tee that you have on. He makes a mental note to give you whatever it is of his you want, the shirt, him, he likes the way they both look on you.

You sit up slightly to help him remove it. He looks at you one more time asking for permission. “Touch me.” You say and that drives him mad. The way you sound for him- so needy.

Jungkook is quick to start kissing your collarbone and undoing your bathing suit top at the same time.

You’re not sure why you feel so nervous and vulnerable, but maybe it’s because his touch has you completely drenched and you’re trying not to make it obvious.

He grabs one of your breasts in his hand and brings his mouth to it, sucking and licking it over and over. His teeth lightly grazing every now and then just before he lets them go with a pop. You could cum from this alone, you’re sure especially when he looks up at you the way he is right now.

“By the time I’m done with you, you would have been convinced to stay anyway.” He says kissing your lower belly. You moan out and suddenly feel his fingers at your hips. He places kisses on each side as he begins to slide your bottoms down your legs, and sits on his knees to make sure they come off completely.

You can barely breathe at a normal rate. Everything he is doing is so effortlessly sexy. You feel a little shy just because it’s something you’ve always dreamed of. it’s been a while since you’ve been intimate with anyone. Your relationship eventually deprived you of that too, due to you both barely sleeping in the same room. You try to close your legs, but he is holding your ankle. He takes his time kissing his way from there up to your thigh.

“Don’t hide from me. I won’t hurt you, I’m here with you. Okay?” He says and you nod, smiling at him.

Jungkook is thorough in making sure not a space on your skin feels neglected, your moans and breathy exhales indicate that you’re enjoying this and getting worked up.

His fingers gently work up toward the area that craves him most and he parts your folds, then licks his lips, turning you on even more.

“Fucking hell___, Your pussy is so pretty.” He moans and gently starts rubbing circular motions on your clit.

“Kook, do something. I’m so wet.” You speak honestly and he has to stop himself from fucking the life out of you right there. He removes his hand and brings the finger that was circling your clit to your lips.

“Suck.”

You wrap your lips around his fingers and make sure to look in his eye as he is now slightly hovering over you, between your legs.

Jungkook’s mouth has fallen into an O shape and you hear him moan for the first time besides your kisses. The way you suck his fingers, He’ll be sure to have your lips wrap around something else, not today though. He wants to make sure you feel what he means when he says “I love you.”

He removes his finger and bites his lip then brings it back down to your clit and resumes his circular motions.

“Kook please do something. You’re teasing me.”

“Enjoying my view, that’s all. Trust me��I’m going to fuck the shit out of you.”

He slides a finger in and you moan as he bends down to kiss you.

“Can you take another?” He asks in between kisses.

You nod and pull away from his lips as the other one is inserted. “I can take whatever you give me, whenever you give it to me.”

You’re driving him insane. Voice so sweet but eyes gazing at him with lust.

“I want you to look at me the entire time.” He says as he removes his lips from yours and hears you moan out.

You don’t answer so he pushes his fingers deeply inside. “Yes. Fuck!” You moan out and he chuckles as he crawls lower onto his stomach, lifting your legs on each of his shoulders. Still managing to pump into you.

. Jungkook removes his fingers, replacing them with his tongue to taste your juices, then flattens his tongue while his eyes roll back. He looks so pornographic and then he makes eye contact with you. His eyes are sexy and smoldering.

“Jungkook! Oh my god!” You moan out. He loves the way his name sounds coming from you. He loves that he’s making you feel good. He loves everything about you.

He begins flicking his tongue up and down your clit, open mouth kissing you in between. He takes his time fucking his tongue into you, watching you grasp at the bed sheets as you try to keep your focus on him. The way your eyes roll back when he rubs his face in it as he eats you out looks so good to him. He feels drunk off of you. You briefly close your eyes as you moan, but that’s when he inserts two fingers again and you both moan. Him because of how you taste and how you are doing so well for him. You, because of how full you feel, How amazing this feels for you. You know you’re close and Jungkook seems to know too. He curls his fingers and rubs you right in the spot that’ll have you coming undone, then he starts spelling his name with this tongue on your clit as your prop up on your elbows still looking at him, like he said. The pleasure becoming so much.

“Such a good fucking girl.” He says and you feel your breath hitch.

“Oh fuck! Jungkook I’m gonna cum!” You moan out and your head falls back, causing Jungkook to pinch at your waist with his other hand, to get you to look at him.

“Cum for me then.”

And you do, making a mess all over his hands. You’re so fucking pretty to him, that he doesn’t stop there. He keeps going enjoying the way look so fucked out. You sound sweet too. He wants to see you like this for him, only him, as long as he can. He’ll make sure it’s forever by the time he’s done.

Jungkook continues eating you out and watching your legs shake and quiver. Your mouth is slack and you’re saying things, but they all are pretty incoherent due to all the moaning you’re doing in between. This is exactly what you’ve wanted, better than you’ve imagined.

“Kook.. I’m gonna cum again. You have to stop. I want you to feel good too.” You say between your moans.

“I’m worried about you baby. You just need to let me worry about you.” He responds.

The pet name sending you over the edge as you feel a ton of pressure in your pit, you can feel your release coming.

“Oh, my J-Jungkook!” You have to stop moaning his name like that. He’s been trying his best not to split you open and take his time with you. He remains as patient as he can as he feels how close he has you again. He pumps the fingers he has in you just a little faster, as you squirt all over him. You can’t believe how turned on it makes him. His lips slightly opening

“Damn, thats so fucking sexy.” He says as he makes sure to pull his fingers out and slide his fingers into his mouth.

“You taste. So. Fucking. Good. “ he says as he moans while cleaning your juices off his hand. Looking at you before his brows furrow and his eye roll again. He knows exactly what he’s doing.

“Kookie. Lay down. It’s my turn.” You try but He shakes his head no as he props himself on his knees.

“Help me with my shorts, then lay your ass back down. I’m not in the mood for you to be defiant about it either. I keep telling you it’s about you.”

Oh. He’s that type in bed. You’ve hit the jackpot.

You follow the instructions given to you and help undo the strings on his shorts, then you lay back down. What you don’t expect is for him to be that big. You easily could tell he was a nice size but not this big.

“Holy fuck.” You say and he chuckles. he strokes himself in his hand. He was easily the biggest you’ve seen. Both in length and thickness. The tip of him, so red, swollen, and plump. His Head falls back just a little before he shoots his eyes back at yours.

“But you can take it, right baby? You said you can take whatever I give you.” He says as spreads the pre cum around his head.

You nod your head, yes and he smirks.

“Good.” He spits on your pussy and then decides to reach toward his drawer but you catch his hand.

“I trust you. I want to feel you. All of you.” You look up at him through your lashes as you say and he nods.

He kisses you and whispers against your lips. “If it’s too much say something.”

You shake your head no. “No, I told you I could take it all.”

He lines himself up with your entrance and slowly pushes in. You both moan at the contact.

“You’re so fucking tight. Jesus baby.” He says as he bites his lip, inching further into you.

“Jungkook, more. ” You moan out and you both make eye contact. He kisses your forehead and then you lean up a little for a kiss. He obliges and slides further into you. He’s finally in. You fit so snugly around him, you’re so wet and warm too.

Jungkook cups your face and looks into your eyes as he starts bottoming out of you. Missionary was a great choice he thinks to himself. You’re so beautiful underneath him. You love the way he looks at you. He moves some hair out of your face and whispers.

“I choose you. I chose you so long ago,” As he pumps into you. Jungkook looks slightly down and can also see himself. Your tummy bulging as he pumps into you. You can’t believe it either. He’s so thick and long. Reaching places you’ve never been touched before.

“Look at how well this pussy is taking me.” He says eyes blown out and piercing between his teeth as he bites on his lip.

You’re a moaning mess underneath him, but you look into his eyes and pull his face to yours for a kiss. He feels so good inside you. Your walls contract whenever he slides out slightly. He loves every part of you and you love every part of him.

“Kook you make me feel so good.” You say moaning more into the kisses you’ve both been stealing.

“Good, that’s what I want, for you to feel good.” He continues pumping in and out but he leans up from the kiss and pushes your knees to your shoulders as he continues to pump into you.

“Just. Like. that.” You say as your arms reach for his bicep. He loves how well you take him. You love how deep and passionate each thrust is.

Jungkook watches as you cream all over him, he knows he won’t last long with the way you’ve been moaning his name. He needs to make you cum again first, it’s easily the sexiest thing he’s ever seen.

You motion him back down to you and he smirks. “Can’t stop kissing me?”

You nod your head no. “I can’t. Your right…Oh fuck! Please don’t stop.” You moan the last part out.

“I won’t, not until this pretty pussy cums for me again.” He makes sure you understand and kisses you, just like you want.

You start to feel that familiar buildup in your stomach and moan his name some more, you’ve damn near been chanting it now.

“You’re close.” He says and you nod.

“Then be a good girl, and make a mess on this dick. It’s yours anyway.” The statement has you whimpering and Jungkook starts circling his thumb on your clit as he pumps in and out of you.

That’s when you break and he watches everything ooze out of you onto him. You have cum three times. That’s a record you think to yourself -and he still has to cum.

“You think you can be a good girl one last time and cum with me ?” He asks.

Jungkook is going to be the death of you, but you nod yes. You just want to make him feel good too. He’s been praising you and giving you ownership this whole time. Of course, you can be a good girl for him.

Jungkook starts going a little harder with each roll of his hips. It’s still slow and sensual, just deeper-you’re not sure how he’s even managing to do that.

“ Yes, oh my god. Jungkook.”

He chuckles. You’re so cute. Taking him like he’s always wanted.

Your cum slicked walls are tight and clenching him perfectly. just about send him over the edge. He leans into your ear and whispers “Ready?” You shake your head fast.

“Yes baby, I’m ready.” You say. Jungkook just heard you return the pet name he’s been calling you. You’re in absolute heaven, creaming his dick, slightly running down his thighs.

“Who does this pussy belong to?” He asks and you moan out your answer.

“You!! Kook please… cum with me.” You moan out every single word.

That’s when you feel both your orgasms collide and kiss some more. Jungkook makes sure to watch you as he pumps more, you both ride out your highs.

Then he collapses beside you pulling you into his chest.

“That was so good, that’s the best sex I’ve ever had.”you say and he smirks.

“Yeah, it was. Let me get you cleaned up and get new sheets.” He says kissing your lips one more time

You spent the rest of the night asleep on his chest, but when you wake up Jungkook is missing-that’s when you smell breakfast. Just like you remember. You go brush your teeth and wash your face seeing the gift you were supposed to hand to him in your bag. You make a mental note to give it to him this morning. once you’re finished, you then walk out to a shirtless Jungkook flipping pancakes and smiling at you.

“HI.” He says and you see Bam walking over to you.

“Good morning to you both!” You say patting Bam on the head and walking over to the person preparing breakfast.

“I got you a gift.” You say and he raises an eyebrow. You slide it across the counter and he immediately smiles when he unwraps it.

His smile says enough. He loves it. You know he does.

“You have perfect timing, I think I broke the one I’m currently using! Thank you, princess.”

“You’re so welcome, I’m really sorry about how I treated you. Plus this reminded me of you,” you reply and then you get up to stand with him.

He winks at you. It’s nice to know he was on your mind. You promise to tell him every time he is now. He’s a priority and you want him to know that.

“Listen, we should talk so just listen to me.” He says as he watches you wrap your arms around him from behind, but he turns around facing you.

“I think Jimin, Joon, and Hobi can go get your stuff from your apartment but I want to tell you the truth. After last night, I can’t keep being your friend. I want you to know I meant every word about loving you and no- you don’t have to say it back but let me prove it to you ____ because you deserve more than your getting at h-“

You realize, It’s now your turn to cut him off and you hurry and put your lips on his to kiss him.

“Jeon Jungkook, I love you too. After last night, I don’t want to be your friend either.”

“So...Can I be your boyfriend?” He asks you and you nod your head yes so fast earning a laugh, as he leans down to kiss you.

He smiles at you and wraps his mouth around yours. Your arms around his neck as he explores your mouth.

“ Breakfast in bed?” You question and he immediately picks up on what you mean.

Jungkook pulls you closer, then whispers on your lips “After last night...

Anything you want."

Author's Note: This definitely went in a different direction than planned, but I just want to say thank you so much for reading, all feedback is welcome! I may start a Drabble series for this couple, so stay tuned.

Taglist:@kimber-koo @taesungx @jennafromhome @diorh0seokie @joyfulwobblerhoagiee

#jungkook smut #bts smut #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook #jungkook x y/n #jungkook fic #bts #jungkook fanfic #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #jungkook x you #jeon jungkook x reader

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agendabymooner · 1 year ago

Text

SOMETHING ANGELIC !!! CHARLES L. X FEM!READER (18+)

summary: she was so sweet but her ex should've known better than keeping her his dirty little secret. OR it was wrong to lust after her ex's teammate but charles leclerc was willing to give her everything.

content warning: smut under the cut (minors dni!), use of explicit language, tbh there's barely smut in there but charles is nasty as fuck so 🙃, ex!carlos sainz x pr manager!reader, hint of corruption kink (not really), p in v, unprotected sex (plz use protection), lowkey possessive!charles, i barely understand what i wrote tbh

note: i only post a lot of charles when he's a dad to the leclerc boys but god did i have some filthy thoughts about him tonight. enjoy xx

something sinful (smut) masterlist

a - n masterlist

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if you’d like to get on one of my taglists, check this post out

it was wrong to lust for your ex’s teammate, but charles leclerc was determined to make her his and he made sure that she knew that.

a whole winter break was enough to move on, right? right. charles couldn’t give much shit about the time limit for a person to move on from their ex.

not when he saw her throughout the first race week as she took long strides while she followed esteban ocon for the french driver’s media duties. charles used to see her in the ferrari area — being carlos’ sweet secret girlfriend and public relations manager.

how carlos had managed to get away from his crimes of being seen with another woman in public while fucking his manager behind the scenes was something that charles would never understand— but the monégasque pitied the sweet woman for having to see her boyfriend play tonsil hockey with someone else.

she was angelic, having to put up with that kind of thing. and all charles wanted to do was to make her his— to somehow make her realize that she was worth more than what carlos had recognized her for.

his green eyes nearly darkened when he saw her, sitting alone at the booth that the alpine drivers occupied for the night with a sad expression on her pretty face. four months of break away from carlos and she was still affected by the break up that occurred half a year ago.

and her sadness was quickly swept aside when she saw charles taking a stride towards her direction, scooting over instinctively as the ferrari driver offered her a grateful smile and sat next to her.

“i haven’t seen you for a while,” charles told her with a smile, “pierre was incredibly foul for not inviting you to any of our functions during the break.”

“ah- yeah,” she let out an apologetic smile, “i’ve been trying to adjust to my new place in nice. i figured if i was going to be working for alpine, i might as well live in france.”

“oh you moved? trés bonne,” charles nodded, earning a sheepish smile from her. he nearly melted at the sweetness on her reaction. god she was so fucking perfect.

“it’s such a shame i don’t get to see you in the office anymore, though,” he shrugged. “ferrari lost an asset.”

she snorted quietly, “hm, fred even said so. but you know— people come and go.”

“it’s such a pitiful thing, though,” charles said, looking at her while they both drank, “you should’ve been my manager— you’d do more good with me.”

“you’re right,” she drawled, now staring at his eyes as she playfully said, “you wouldn’t fuck me and i wouldn’t get emotionally attached.”

as if they were both in another universe, charles then chuckled darkly and boldly claimed, “i mean... i still would’ve fucked you— i just wouldn’t be stupid enough to let you go and treat you like a dirty little secret.”

she saw how his pupils darkened as he spoke, feeling her legs absentmindedly closing and squirming. as if the floodgates had opened and arousal had gotten the best of her.

“nobody knew about you and sainz but me, right? the amount of times i’ve had to turn a blind eye was insane— i almost thought i’d have to intervene because it was compromising his media duties,” charles admitted, “i wondered what kept you from getting him to move and do his job— it turns out he’s just fucking you in his motorhome. i’ve had to tell the social media manager that he’s just woken up from a nap.”

“he pretended that you’re not even worth the attention after his races because you’ve always been second best to him,” charles tutted.

she huffed, “there’s no need to rub it on my face—“

“—oh no, mon tresor, i’m not being a dickhead about it,” charles shook his head, placing his drink down on the table.

the lights in the club were nothing but colourful strobes that didn’t even spot them, making it easier for him to get closer without anyone noticing and interrupting them.

his breath fanned her ear as he whispered huskily, “i wouldn’t allow him to make you see yourself as second best, mon ange.”

“charles—“ she let out a breathless sigh, feeling his mouth leave open mouthed kisses on her skin. “this is so wron—“

“nothing’s wrong with this when we don’t work anymore, mon tresor,” he murmured. “there’s nothing more wrong than allowing your sweetness to get in the way of the things you so deserve.”

“and you know how to show me the things i deserve?” she asked, almost innocently. god, was he about to cream in his pants if she continued to say shit like this.

“you can demand the world and i’ll give you the universe,” charles watched her accept his offer as he smiled widely.

it was so wrong to lust after her ex’s teammate, but if charles leclerc was willing to give her everything then who was she to reject the offer? the monégasque was telling her to be greedy, and this was the best way to do it.

she felt too overwhelmed. whether it was because of how charles treated her body or how he spoke so dirtily— she wasn’t sure.

her mind was on an overdrive. all she could think about was him. his godlike figure, his prettiest eyes and his thick cock that continued to pound inside her cunt.

she almost shook at his tone as he groaned delightfully right by her ear, “mon dieu, chéri, tu te sens si divin.” my god, darling, you feel so divine.

charles helped her prop herself up back on her knees as his hand guided her eyes towards the mirror in front of them, watching her eyes glistening as much as her cunt did in pleasure.

he then murmured, “do you see yourself, sweetheart? you look so pretty.”

she couldn’t even find herself to look when all she’s thinking about was the cock that stuffed her from behind, a strangled whine escaping her throat as she urged him to move.

“i wish carlos was here to see this,” he chuckled deeply, his fingers pinching her hardened nipple before trailing down her clit to stimulate her even more. she let out a loud whimper, now feeling overwhelmed by his words and his actions as he fucked her once more. “so he knows not to treat you like you’re not worth bragging about.”

“but i guess he had a reason to keep you a secret, hm?” he taunted her, rocking his hips against her as he bottomed out inside her. “because he knew that once you’re out in the world you’d be corrupted by some men. he was so selfish that he thought his sweet innocent girlfriend shouldn’t be corrupted by anyone but him.”

“oh how wrong he was,” charles moaned, his thrusts turning rough and fast as he growled. “you know you deserve better than being a dirty little secret, no?” he tapped her face lightly with his palm as he said, “answer me, mon ange.”

“o- oh- yes,” she cried out, “yes, yes—“

“i can give you everything, mon tresor,” he murmured, “everything that he couldn’t give you.”

“fuck, charles! please,” she mewled, looking behind her with pleading eyes as she begged desperately, “want to cum again, charles please~”

“gonna cum in this pussy of yours, mon ange—“

“please, cum inside me,” she moaned aloud, her desperation echoing around the suite as well as the skins slapping against each other. “please pleaseeee~ just wan’ to cum. god! feel so full, fuck!”

“gonna cum inside you, and make you mine,” he growled quietly, nibbling on her skin as she whined and mewled. her walls clenched at the thought as he chuckled, “oh? you want that, hm? you want me to make this pussy mine?”

“yes! fuck-“ she exclaimed, her body convulsing while she whined, “want you to own me, charles. wanna be stuffed full by you only, charles please~”

“you could’ve asked me a long time ago, mon tresor,” his thrusts turned hard and slower as he came inside her, feeling her clench around his cock as they reached their highs.

she was too fucked out and full, content at the feeling of his cock inside of her while feeling nothing but happiness being in his arms.

charles couldn’t help but grin widely at the sight of her limped body and the dazed expression on her face. he couldn’t find himself to think about his teammate when this sweet woman was finally his.

he knew that he could do so much better treating her like a queen that she was than carlos would ever do.

everything that her ex never gave her— charles would be more than willing to hand it to her on a gold plate.

the next morning, charles found carlos at the hotel lobby as they were both heading to the airport. the two ferrari drivers got to speak to one another before pierre gasly and esteban ocon saw them and talked amongst themselves.

carlos sainz sure was the kind to be confused and puzzled, and he showed this when esteban’s manager — who was once carlos’ girlfriend and manager — approached the group and talked to the drivers before turning to charles with a sweet smile.

“are you going to go now, mon ange?” charles asked with a smile, watching her blush at the attention she got from him as she nodded meekly. “you could just come with us, you know? we’re heading to the same place, anyway.”

“yeah but,” she gestured to the two alpine drivers, “someone has to control these two before the next race week starts.”

the alpine drivers protested against her words as she and charles giggled. charles then looked at her and said, “okay well… text me when you get there, okay?”

she nodded and gave charles a sheepish smile (as if she hadn’t found herself saying the filthiest words to him the night before; not that carlos knew).

charles wrapped his arms around her before kissing her passionately, humming at the taste of her. pierre let out a whistle and esteban grinned at the two toothily.

while carlos… carlos was just confused as fuck.

“see you tomorrow, pretty girl,” charles winked at her, smirk playfully written on his face as she giggled quietly and left with the two alpine drivers.

charles found carlos staring at him with his mouth slightly agape, making the monegasque chuckle and shake his head. “she’s so sweet and pretty, no?”

♡ moony’s reminder 🅶 (general): @hiraethrhapsody @avaleineandafryingpan @topguncultleader @enhacolor @roseandtulips @woweewoowa @magnummagnussen @happy-nico

♡ moony’s reminder 🅴 (explicit edition): @glitterf1 @savrose129

#charles leclerc smut #cl16 imagine #cl16 x reader #cl16 #formula one imagine #f1 fic #formula one smut #f1 smut #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #formula 1 smut #formula 1 #carlos sainz #charles leclerc fic #cl16 smut #f1 imagine #formula one fic #♔ something sinful ⎯ f1 smut

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ineffable-romantics · 1 year ago

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Some thoughts on why and how I believe Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship would incorporate sex/why I do not read them as wholly asexual:

This is something I've seen the most discourse about in this fandom, and I've had a few thoughts of my own that I really wanted to expand upon in a full meta/character analysis post. I do understand that this can be a contentious topic, so first, let me clarify a few things:

First of all, this is going to be long. Tbh it probably won't be that organized either. I ramble and I'm not very good at editing, so just... you know. Be warned. (*Hi, it's me from 2 days after writing this; I'm really not kidding, it's LONG)

These are all my own thoughts. They might not be hot takes, because recently I've seen more than a few people come to the same conclusions on a lot of these points as I have. But I've also had these notes in my drafts for about a week and a half now, and have been continuously adding to it as things have occurred to me. This post is essentially just somewhere for me to collect the separate but related meta I've been kicking around in my head.

I fully respect anyone who does see and prefer an asexual reading of this relationship. These are my own thoughts and interpretations as someone who is not asexual. I am in the LGBT+ community, so while I do know a few things about the asexuality spectrum, I am by no means an expert.

This is NOT something I expect, need, or even necessarily want the show (or, God forbid, Neil's tumblr ask box) to address. Tonally, it's just not that kind of show. Newt and Anathema's sex scene was very much played for laughs, and it worked for that reason. If the show found a way to address it in a way that was both appropriate for the tone of the show and ultimately satisfying, then great! But there is so much more to this relationship than sex, and I didn't need a kiss to confirm their love, so I certainly don't need a sex scene. As immortal beings (as I assume they'll stay) there is so much of the rest of their lives we'll never get to see. You can headcanon them as asexual and potentially be right. I can headcanon them as not and be equally potentially right. Again, these are just a collection of my own thoughts, because I think the question of sexuality (or lack thereof) is just as interesting a facet of these characters as any other.

Note: Tbh I've been second-guessing this whole post and debated deleting the whole thing several times for being silly or unnecessary, bc I don't want anyone to think that this is the only thing I care about when it comes to this story/characters. But if nothing else, it's inspired me to write in a way that nothing has in a very long time, so I've decided it's worth continuing, if for no other reason than that.

This is going to be a mixed bag of textual reading, subtextual reading, and a full-on reach or two. It's been a while since I've been in an English class, but if my teachers expected me to find a deeper meaning behind blue curtains, you can expect me to read too deeply into the symbolism of a loaded rifle or an ox rib. (This is probably not what my professors had in mind when grading my literary analysis papers but oh well) My point is, if it feels like a reach, I'm as aware of it as you are. I am in no way saying that all (or even any) of my points made were deliberate on the part of Neil or the actors or the writers or the directors. I am no longer the delulu Apple Tree Yard child of my youth, I promise.

If anything said here is in any way offensive or hurtful to anyone in the asexual community, please do not hesitate to message me or comment and let me know exactly what it was. I promise you it is not my intention to do so, and am happy to clarify or outright edit anything that reads that way.

With all that being said, let's talk about why I think Crowley and Aziraphale would absolutely fuck nasty incorporate sex into their relationship.

Note: I am out of practice with essay writing, so I think I'll just go down the bullet points of notes I have been making, and expand on each as best I can

Food

Where better to start than with Aziraphale's introduction to Pleasures Of The Flesh? (Just a heads up, this entire post may feel very Aziraphale-heavy, and with good reason).

This might be the least hot take here. We've all seen the Job minisode. We've all seen That Scene.

Whether this was intentional or not, the symbolism here is off the charts. Eve was tempted by an apple. So why not go a similar route and tempt Aziraphale with another fruit, or cheese, or bread, or literally anything else for his first experience with food? Instead, we go with a huge, glistening slab of fresh meat that he proceeds to absolutely go feral upon, moaning and gasping into his meal while Crowley watches with what definitely doesn't look to be disgust or even satisfaction with a good temptation. There's surprise at the ferocity of Aziraphale's appetite, certainly. But ultimately he looks to be intensely fascinated by it, while the thunder crashes, the music crescendos, and the earth literally shakes around them.

(It's also interesting to note how very little it takes for Crowley to tempt him with the ox rib. One murmured suggestion, a bit of unwavering eye contact, and vavoom Aziraphale immediately meets him in the middle.)

Cut to Aziraphale devouring the rest of the meat with Crowley splayed back on a makeshift bed, drinking wine and continuing to watch him indulge through half-lidded eyes. Outside a thunderstorm rages while they're learning secrets about each other in warm flickering firelight. It's cosy, it's intimate, and if they'd thrown in a bearskin throw blanket, it might as well be a post-coital scene straight out of Game of Thrones.

The next time (chronologically) we see them discuss food is when Aziraphale "tempts" Crowley with oysters in Rome. So Crowley first tempts Aziraphale with meat and then Aziraphale tempts Crowley with what is widely regarded to be an aphrodisiac. Interesting.

And then chronologically after that, the Arrangement begins to form, which has always reeked of a friends with benefits situation. Just to throw that in there.

It's What Humans Do

In the very first episode, we're shown Gabriel's obvious disgust and bewilderment towards Aziraphale eating sushi, calling it "gross matter" and being proud of the fact that he does not sully his body with it. Aziraphale initially tries to defend his own enjoyment in it, before passing it off as something that humans do, as something he simply has to do in order to blend in (which we know very well is not the case).

He does this again in season 2, passing off Nina and Maggie being in love as "something humans do". But it isn't, is it? Angels are beings of love, and can sense it, and understand very well what it is... up to a point. Even romantic love is obviously within their wheelhouse, given what we now know happened between Gabriel and Beelzebub (we'll come back to them).

What the "humans do" that angels wouldn't understand is messy, physical forms of love.

But here's the thing: Aziraphale and Crowley love doing what the humans do. They love drinking, they (or at least Aziraphale) love eating. They love music. Crowley loves driving and sleeping and watching rom-coms and sitcoms. Aziraphale loves reading and doing magic and earning little licenses and certificates for achievement in his various hobbies. They love to playact at being human so much that they've stopped playacting and started building a genuinely human lifestyle for themselves and with each other.

Once together in an unambiguously romantic sense, why do we think they wouldn't also want to explore one of the most prominent, intimate, powerful human expressions of love and desire with each other?

Angels, Demons, & Asexuality

Here's where I really want to clarify that in no way do I mean that sex is necessary for a healthy, fulfilling, and loving romantic relationship, or that the lack of desire for sex makes you any less human. Asexuality is a sexuality as valid and human as any. What I would say is that it is definitely in the human minority compared to allosexuality.

Angels and demons, on the other hand, are predominately asexual. Sexless/genderless unless Making An Effort. (Which, btw, is a concept introduced as early as the original book; why even bring it up as a possibility? Why not keep angels/demons being sexless/asexual as a hard and fast rule, if not to open up the potential for later use? Chekhov's Effort, if you will. And isn't that something that Aziraphale in particular is shown to do time and time again? He makes an effort in French and driving and magic, doesn't he?)

And this is why I don't believe Aziraphale and Crowley necessarily need to be asexual, narratively. There is already a huge amount of ace rep within the angels and demons (and no, not just the horrible ones. Muriel also doesn't "drink the tea" and has no reason or desire thus far to Make An Effort, and there are certainly other angels and demons who aren't horrible like the archangels seem to be who likely wouldn't Make An Effort either).

The central conflict for Aziraphale and Crowley is that they are on their own side, the ones who went native, the ones who are so different in so many ways from their respective hives. It would make sense for them to also break away from traditional angel/demon asexuality.

I say "traditional angel/demon asexuality", because I would also like to note that I would absolutely not rule out demisexuality for either of them. This post is being written to as a response to people who specifically believe that they (like the rest of the angels/demons seem to be) would be sex-averse in a relationship, and that it wouldn't be a factor in their relationship. I could easily read them as demisexual, but I do think there would be no real way of verifying this, because they've never been able to form as close an emotional relationship with anyone else but each other. Certainly not in heaven, and I can't imagine they would be able to form that kind of attachment with any of the humans, who they love and emulate but ultimately regard as the separate species they are. So yes, they could either be allosexual or demisexual, in my opinion.

Then again, now that I think about it, Making An Effort itself could be a great metaphor for demisexuality, since they would be entirely sexless/asexual until they have enough of an emotional connection with someone to consciously manifest otherwise. Since the other angels and demons don't generally form those types of emotional connections with anyone, there hasn't been a precedent for it.

Except...

Brielzebub

We do have a precedent for it now, don't we? Gabriel and Beelzebub fell in love. They are a direct foil for Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship, speedrunning right through their courtship and finding their happily ever after on the other side of things.

For being such a 1 to 1 comparison, it feels deliberate that they did not kiss. They held hands, they were gooey with each other, but they did not kiss. That feels like such a deliberate thing to omit when you know what's to come at the end of the episode between Crowley and Aziraphale.

And going back to the food = sex metaphor for a moment, let's notice how even as they fell in love over the years, even when pints and crisps were there on the table in front of them, they never felt the desire to reach out for them. They didn't need to. It's a date (love story) even if you aren't eating dinner (sleeping together).

Yes, I know Jim liked hot chocolate. No, I am not counting it because I don't consider Jim and Gabriel to be the same person with the same proclivities, and Jim was highly suggestible at the time anyway.

Gabriel and Brielzebub's big happily ever after moment (as of now) was one between two asexual supernatural beings. They did not need to kiss to drive the point home. They showed what Crowley and Aziraphale could have, if they would only acknowledge it.

Crowley & Aziraphale's Dissatisfaction

But they do have that already, don't they? If you really think about it, what do Gabriel and Beelzebub do with each other that Crowley and Aziraphale don't already? They hold hands, they spend time together, they create little rituals, they give gifts, they're visibly and verbally affectionate with each other, etc. They are more or less already in a romantic asexual marriage relationship with each other, aren't they?

And it doesn't seem to be enough for either of them.

At the beginning of the season, Crowley is immediately shown to be unsatisfied with the way things are. Obviously part of it comes from living in his car, but it seems to be more than that (especially since Aziraphale makes it clear that the bookshop is just as much Crowley's as his, implying that he could have been living there the whole time and is choosing not to, for some reason?). You could argue he's feeling unmoored without Hell telling him what to do, but isn't that what he wanted? Isn't that what he still wants, by the end of the season? All season long, he's never indicated the desire for a new job, or a new project. He stopped the apocalypse because he wanted the freedom to openly spend time with Aziraphale, to spend his time on Earth however he sees fit. Until Gabriel arrives, he has exactly that (minus a flat).

So where does the dissatisfaction come from? And if it represents anything to do with his relationship, what does he want out of it that he isn't getting already?

I think Crowley only really comes to the realisation of what he's missing when Nina names it for him, not only putting them in the category of romantic, but physical (outright asking if they are sleeping together). These two posts [1], [2] go into more detail about what I mean, but I think it really pushes him into acknowledging that their relationship is more human than either of them have stopped to consider, and what that might mean as far as everything a human relationship can entail.

After all, Nina and Maggie only advised that he should talk to Aziraphale, make clear his feelings. The decision to kiss him, to tip them over the edge from nonphysical to physical, that was all him. And no, kissing isn't sex, but I wonder how taboo even that might be in the kind of all-encompassing asexuality most angels seem to identify with. (If they're disgusted by food and drink, I can only imagine what they think of snogging, much less sex.)

Aziraphale doesn't have this moment of someone observing their relationship from the outside. He loves Crowley, and as of 1941 probably even knows he's in love with him in a way that Crowley doesn't understand yet. Which makes sense, since love is technically his job, he'd be more likely to recognise it for what it is.

However, Aziraphale's reference for romance and relationships is Jane Austen. It's chaste. It's dancing and dinner and doing sweet things for each other and roses and candles and handholding. He contextualises his love for Crowley in that soft fantasy sort of way, where it's there, it's obviously there, but it's neat and easy and unspoken. Not to quote Glee in this, the year of our lord 2023, but it's all very "the touch of the fingertips is as sexy as it gets".

Someone should tell that to Aziraphale's face, then.

I'm not going to pretend I know what Michael Sheen's script notes were, but there were definitely some Choices™ made. Because yes, there were plenty of moments in both seasons with Aziraphale looking at Crowley in a sweet, loving, smitten way. And then there were moments that were yearning.

But yearning for what, exactly? All of those sappy Jane Austen tropes already apply to the two of them. So why are there moments where Aziraphale is looking Crowley up and down like the last eclair in the window and licking his lips and visibly exhaling like he's trying to get in control of himself (see: Bastille scene + Crowley telling Muriel to ask him if they have any other questions about love)? Why is Aziraphale not only unconcerned when Crowley shoves him bodily up against a wall in s1, but staring at his lips and a beat too late in noticing Sister Mary's arrival? Why are some of his lines so suggestive? I'm sorry, but the car ride after the church explosion might as well have been the beginning of a Pizza Man porn with a really weird Blitz theme. If even my mother picked up on that vibe, I can't imagine it wasn't intentional on part of both the dialogue and the delivery.

(This section may feel like more of a reach/joke, but I'm really only 20% joking. These are writers and actors who are EXTREMELY good at their jobs; they know what they were doing here.)

More importantly, I don't think Aziraphale is even aware that there is more to what he wants. He lives in the Jane Austen fantasy and it never even occurs to him that he might be interested in anything further. It never even occurs to him that, as an angel, there is anything further to be interested in in the first place. Until Crowley forces it to occur to him. Just like I believe Nina forced Crowley to confront the idea that romantic love is what he's been feeling all along, I believe Crowley forced Aziraphale to confront the idea that physical intimacy is something he's been wanting, without even realising.

Aziraphale's Hedonism

Expanding on Aziraphale for a moment. We talked about his relationship with food, but we all know that Aziraphale is defined by his love of things that Feel Good.

It isn't just that he and Crowley love human things. Aziraphale loves the best of the best, or at least his version of it. He doesn't just love food, he loves going to fancy restaurants. He doesn't just love clothes, he loves soft, cosy, warm, plush clothes, or shiny, flashy, bougie fashion. He loves the warmth of tea and cocoa, loves getting drunk, and sitting in a comfy chair in the sunlight. He doesn't just experience, he indulges.

Given the emphasis put on things that Aziraphale loves just because they Feel Good, it feels narratively strange to assume that he wouldn't enjoy the feeling of being touched, or that he wouldn't be willing to try it, at least once, with someone he cared very deeply for. And just like the ox rib, I think that once he gets the first taste of things, he would absolutely tip over into complete and utter self-indulgence.

Dancing

I also think that dancing could be construed as a huge metaphor here. After all, we're told flat-out that angels don't Dance. Except one.

I would argue that Aziraphale, in fact, Made An Effort to learn how to Dance. He threw himself into the gavotte with delight (at a Victorian gay club; noted) and worked hard to be good at it. He's chomping at the bit to Dance with Crowley, working up the nerve to ask him with undeniably romantic intent and eagerness. So, angels don't Dance... unless they Make An Effort to do so.

We are told that demons, on the other hand, do Dance, but not well. Makes sense, since they're the ones who would want to encourage a deadly sin like lust, but have as little understanding of human love and physical intimacy as the angels. Crowley, however, is shown to be an excellent dancer at the ball, especially in his compatibility with Aziraphale.

(But Aziraphale WandaVisioned the ball so everyone knew how to dance! Yes, he did. However, the rest of the brainwashing doesn't seem to affect Crowley in any way, and they did actually live through the time period where this sort of dancing was a social norm; I'd be surprised if he never needed to learn. After all, the demons can't spell either, and Crowley is at least functionally literate, as far as we know.)

As of today, it's also been confirmed that when Aziraphale asked Crowley to dance, Crowley replied with "you don't dance." Not "WE don't dance". So going along with the metaphor, Crowley is just now discovering that Dancing is something Aziraphale is interested in at all, much less with him, and not denying that he himself is interested in Dancing. In his defense, I believe he was asleep for a few years while Aziraphale was learning the gavotte, so he wasn't exactly aware of Aziraphale's hot girl summer.

Love Languages

I want to expand on that; Crowley and Aziraphale's compatibility. Specifically in regards to their individual love languages.

We all know Crowley's love language is Acts of Service. I don't think there's any debate there. He loves it, Aziraphale loves it, they're both aware of it, we're all aware of it, God and Satan are aware of it, no surprise there.

You may disagree with me, but I believe Aziraphale's love language is Physical Touch, for a number of reasons. One of which being his aforementioned hedonism. Aziraphale likes things that Feel Good, remember? He likes soft clothes, and well-worn books. Neil himself has said that they like holding hands. And any time he is taken by surprise (Brielzebub getting together, the wave of love in Tadfield, etc.) what is the first thing he does? Reaches out for Crowley. He stops him with a hand to the chest in the pub. He leads him by the hand to the dance floor. He guides him by the waist in the graveyard. He reaches out during the entire Brielzebub scene, whether he can reach Crowley or not. Despite his own turmoil, he grasps at Crowley's back during the kiss.

The one time Crowley reaches out for him (not counting the kiss yet; we'll get there), he is aggressively pushed against a wall (by someone he loves and trusts) with a complete and utter lack of concern (and perhaps some interest, depending on how you read it).

And when he isn't reaching out for anyone, or there isn't anyone to reach out to? Well, he's wringing his own hands together, squeezing his own fingers, as if to find that physical comfort in himself.

So. With that theory in mind, we have Aziraphale (Physical Touch) + Crowley (Acts of Service). Throw in 6000+ years of deep love, cherished companionship, and forcibly repressed longing, and there is a very real potential of this combination resulting in fierce sexual compatibility. Where Aziraphale would want to touch and be touched, to indulge in physical pleasure with someone he adores, in the same the way he indulges in every other fine thing in his life. And where Crowley would want to indulge him in return, to give him everything he wants, and to take pleasure in Aziraphale's pleasure, in the same way he enjoys watching him take joy in food everything else.

So Aziraphale is an angel who is insecure about his own less-than-holy desires, who would want to treat Crowley like a luxury to be touched and cherished and adored. And Crowley is a demon who has, over the millennia, been unhappy about how they've been forced to deny even their friendship with each other, who would want Aziraphale to feel comfortable and safe and encouraged to indulge in earthly delights. That sounds like a stunning recipe for sexual compatibility to me.

"You said 'trust me'" / "And you did"

Just like the Job minisode, the Blitz is RIFE with symbolism (intentional or otherwise). This one will be quick, but I did want to touch on it because I thought it was interesting. Maybe I'm reaching at this point, but I'm assuming you read the tin.

First of all, Crowley not wanting to admit to never firing a gun before; comes off as someone who very much does not want to admit to their crush that they're a virgin ("You must have done this lots of times!" / "Umm.... yyyyyeah.")

(You could make the argument that Aziraphale having a firearms license and a Derringer in a hollowed-out book is symbolic of him not being a virgin while Crowley is. I disagree, for reasons I'll go into later, but it's a valid reading. However, I see it more like keeping a condom in your wallet; it's there in case you need it, but the opportunity has not yet risen no pun intended.)

More importantly, the theme of this entire minisode is trust. We already know they trust each other with their lives against the rest of Heaven, Hell, and the world. But specifically, this is about the importance of having complete trust in your partner in a charged, physically vulnerable, intimate moment, where the only danger is between the two of you.

Aziraphale needs to believe Crowley would never hurt him if he can help it. Crowley needs to trust Aziraphale's unwavering blind faith in him. Frankly, it all feels very symbolic of two people deeply in love losing their respective virginities with each other.

The trick is a success, and they share an intimate candlelit dinner in which they reaffirm their faith in each other. Aziraphale also begins to voice his agreement with Crowley, that maybe Heaven's rules shouldn't have to be as black and white as they are, and that there are benefits to... blurring the lines, shades of grey, wink wink (at which point even my mom was like, whoa guys, this is a family show).

Btw also: Can we all agree how much it looked like Crowley was getting ready to get a lapdance in that one scene? You know the one.

Also also: "Aim for my mouth"? Come on.

The Birds & The Bees

Now that I think of it, there's also something to be said for the fact that Crowley and Aziraphale are both obviously familiar with where babies come from (how they're made and how they're born) while the other angels aren't.

Something something Aziraphale and Crowley fundamentally understand sex and reproduction in a way the other angels (and probably demons) very much do not, nor have any desire to.

Probably not important. Just thought it was worth mentioning.

The Kiss™ & Religious Trauma

The Kiss. Where to even begin?

This has definitely been the hardest one to start, because there is so much going on here that I definitely won't be able to cover it all, and will certainly miss a few things here and there.

Aziraphale's reaction to the kiss afterwards is the most interesting to me. And I don't mean directly after, I don't mean the "I forgive you" part. I mean the way he touches his lips when Crowley is no longer in the room and he no longer needs to save face, when he is completely alone. Had it been directly after the kiss, it would have been rightfully read as horror, or disgust, a shield to discourage further action.

It's not. It isn't just a touch, it's a press. As desperate and angry and unexpected and imperfect as the kiss had been, Aziraphale is pressing it into himself, recreating the feeling as best he can. Beneath all the poor timing and shock and hurt from their fight and fallout, I think it's fair to say that it was something he enjoyed. Something he doesn't think he should enjoy, something that Feels Good that he only allows himself to indulge in when completely alone.

Remember, Aziraphale's idea of love is Jane Austen and gentleness and courtship and fantasy. If he'd ever even considered kissing an option, it might have been gentle pecks, cheek kisses, forehead kiss, hand kisses. Soft, safe, chaste affection.

Crowley's kiss turns all of that on its head. He introduces physical intimacy in a very real, very messy, very human way that I don't think Aziraphale ever even considered could apply to them. Considering what other angels are like and what they look down on, even Aziraphale's Jane Austen fantasies probably would have been considered taboo.

So for their first kiss to be rough and desperate and passionate in the way it was, of course he was confused and in shock. It was deeply physical, and as overwhelming and awful as it was in the moment, it Felt Good. Enough that he grasped at Crowley and kissed back, if only just for a moment, before stopping himself. Enough that he actively pressed it into his lips afterwards, in private, to remember.

I adore how Neil has decided to evolve these characters past the first book/season. More so in this season, Aziraphale and Crowley have both become such interesting allegories for queer people on either side of the spectrum of toxic religion. Aziraphale in particular obviously, because he is the side that so desperately wants to believe, to make a difference, and to unlearn all of the propaganda he's been fed over such a long time. Just like so much of organised religion, there is so much that he is told, time and time again, that he should not want, that he is silly or stupid or outright wrong for wanting. It reminds me so much of the severe Catholic guilt one might feel for wanting/engaging in sex for the first time, and the stigma of being queer layered on top of that.

What is so critical to Aziraphale's character is that he goes on wanting, and more than that, actively pursues. He was convinced to go up against Heaven and Hell and stop all of Armageddon because he wanted to go on listening to music and eating lunch and reading books and enjoying the simple company of the person he cares most deeply for, even if that person is supposed to be the enemy.

All this to say that if angels are as generally asexual/sex-averse as I believe them to be, narratively speaking, it would make sense for Aziraphale to be singular in that regard as well. Mirroring his first experience with food, it would make sense for Crowley to be the one to first introduce this new messy, physical, human dynamic between them, for Aziraphale to hesitate (obviously we are at the Hesitation phase at the moment), and then (eventually) for him to dive in wholeheartedly, to absolutely glut himself on this new thing that Feels Good. It would make sense for his character development to show him overcoming his metaphorical Catholic guilt and pursuing the sexual intimacy most (if not all) of the other angels would scorn.

(I can't help but remember that plot idea Neil described from the unwritten sequel, with Aziraphale in a hotel room trying to watch a full porno by way of the free 2-minute teaser clips so he wasn't technically sinning by paying for it. I so hope this is used in season 3, because gosh, I wonder why Aziraphale would suddenly be so interested in observing human physical intimacy after 6,000 years. Lonely and doing a little surreptitious research there, angel?)

Crowley, on the other hand, is the queer person who has broken free from his toxic religion. He prides himself on being his own person, on their his own side. He doesn't have the hang-ups Aziraphale does. He doesn't worry that he's going to be judged or cast aside for wanting things he's not supposed to. So it only makes sense for him to be the first one to suggest/initiate physical intimacy. It makes sense for him to be the one who "goes too fast" (another fantastic example of this dynamic beginning as early as s1; what is that conversation in the car meant to represent, if not Aziraphale being overwhelmed by the intensity of their relationship, and his fear of succumbing to it when he believes he shouldn't? It's also interesting that this is the first conversation to take place in Soho, just after watching Aziraphale realise he's caught feelings for a demon, with the red glow of lust serving as the backdrop).

Do I think the kiss in and of itself was sexual? No. I think it was a passionate and devastating last-ditch effort on Crowley's part to convey the way he feels for Aziraphale. Not just that he loves him, but that he loves him in the most human way possible. But I do think that the kiss represents how they can move forward from here, and what they might want to explore with each other once they feel free enough to do so.

In Conclusion

I am sure, deep in my bones (unless we are explicitly told otherwise), that this was both of their first kisses no, I'm not counting the gavotte, and that neither of them have ever thought to do anything else physical with the humans while they have been on Earth. Like I said before, they adore the human race and lifestyle in general, but ultimately view them as a separate species altogether, and they seem mostly happy to keep to themselves and each other, unless otherwise necessary. I just can't see either of them being drawn enough to a human to pursue anything close to sex. If Crowley in particular has had anything to do with sex in the context of temptations, I'm positive he would be inciting lust amongst the humans themselves, not involving himself directly. At least not that directly.

So, like every other human experience they've had on Earth, sex is something new that they could explore together, just the two of them, on their own side. A deeply intimate, tangible declaration of their love and everything they've gone through to earn it. A visceral finger to give both Heaven and Hell. A renewed appreciation for their corporations and for each other's. A enjoyable method for immortal beings to simply pass the time in each other's company. A new and exciting way to Feel Good, and all the variations that come with it.

You might agree with this post, or you might not. Whether this is something that is ever addressed or not, it doesn't matter to me. This is a brilliant love story either way, and I genuinely feel so privileged to witness it.

But I just can't find it in myself to imagine, given everything we know about these two characters, that sex isn't an experience they would both consume with wholehearted enthusiasm, curiosity, and profound, ineffable adoration.

___________________________________

Bonus feature: the very silly notes I made to myself that inspired this post

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guiltycorp · 2 days ago

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Damn i really want to know tf happened in the writing room of arcane s2. Some of the downgrades were inevitable due to the show's corporate limitations (not being able to progress the class war story in a meaningful way, having to tie things back to league of legends in terms of making playable characters more appealing to well, play... rip Mel and Viktor in particular), sure. But i still feel like it's even worse than that? There are so many bad decisions that i couldn't even start listing them all... the characters, plot, pacing, themes, it's just such a mess? Even the dialogue writing, it feels much more mm Marvel at its worst i suppose. What i am most bothered by is probably just the straight up harmful messaging so um... Cycles of violence and abuse can be broken by individual decisions to become a better person! Got nothing to do with systemic oppression, living conditions, mental health issues, you can just conveniently ignore aaall the social context, live laugh love and then things get better automatically yep, oppressors famously stop oppressing you when you show them that you're harmless and won't put up a fight anymore. Literally three out of three suicidal characters dying to redeem themselves? Not even in a tragic/cathartic way but in a bittersweet 'they finally atoned for their mistakes' way? Groundbreaking lmao. Romantic relationship between Vi and Caitlyn including no communication about their biggest fight, just conveniently skipping to sex and getting back together - would have loved that if it was framed as the unhealthy fucked up thing that it is, skipping over Vi's hurt and her background to once again become a cop, her girlfriend's direct underling at that (!) due to her not having any other support systems... But nope that was our cute lesbian romance wrapped up, a good thing all around, not concerning at all. Jayce telling Viktor that what he 'always admired about him' was his disability and his deadly disease (??? from a character who spent the whole s1 and first act of s2 desperately trying to help Viktor find a cure? sure) and that those imperfections don't need fixing, just wtf truly. Magic bullshit was also weird, some implications of 'natural magic is ok, but achieving that power through other means corrupts you into a crazy robot bitch or just wilts your trees i guess', but tbh it was written in such a weird and inconsistent way that we can skip this one... Yeah actually a lot of things were just such a mess that I feel silly pointing to specific moments or lines I didn't like, I mean duh, it barely makes sense as a story at all... I am happy we have s1 which comparatively was a masterpiece, and i also really enjoyed s2 act1, i truly believed it would lead somewhere good at the time, my mind still kind of cuts off the story at that point when i think about it, that WAS the open ending of the show to me (is it possible that there were rewrites? targeting act 2 and 3? idk, wishful thinking perhaps). Despite my extremely negative feelings about this season's conclusion i remain glad that so many people appreciate the show regardless, it is clear that there was STILL a lot of love in the process of its creation (although i'd argue that even some of the visual aspects of the show suffered in quality, once again i have to wonder about behind the scenes mood of it all) and i get very upset when i see creatives online despairing over reception of their projects even when i'm absolutely in the disgruntled crowd hahaha... ...however yeah, this wasn't great In a world that increasingly grows more and more right-wing politically... we really needed something different i think.

#tbh i also feel a little annoyed that all the league jayvik fans were right all along #i always rolled my eyes like oh shush changing the characters doesnt mean ruining them #and here we are #boo boo the fool jpeg #arcane spoilers #arcane s2 spoilers #arcane critical #negative #ranting #text #long post

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juyeonszn · 1 year ago

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POISON IN MY MIND

PAIRING lee hyunjae x f!reader

WORD COUNT 5.54k

GENRES smut ﹒ some angst (but very little)

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, ceo/ceo’s son!hyunjae, assistant!reader, power play tbh, hyunjae is an asshole (for what he thinks is good reason), another jacob bae appearance, juyeon is also mentioned, there’s a rain scene bc i love my rain scenes <3, hyunjae is a stupid idiot, making out (aggressively), nipple play, no foreplay lol, unprotected sex, sex on a desk x2 — but one is missionary & one is doggy? style?, overstimulation, degradation, brat taming?, creampie lol, the aftercare is there i promise

SUMMARY who really cared that you supposedly hated your boss?

MORE HELLAURRRRR FAWNTOBER DAY 4!!! im hoping i have no delays with the rest of the fics but idk bc the burnout is starting to kick in….. someone pls help…. it’s bc my brain is making me write more than i planned 😭 anyways! pls reblog if u enjoyed!

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri

“Look at you, rutting against me like a fucking bitch in heat,” Hyunjae growls, lips beside your ear as he pounds into you from behind, your hair wrapped tightly around his fist. “Thought you hated me, sweetheart.”

“I— fuck— I do,” you whine, back arching off of the desk and into his chest. “I hate you s-so goddamn much.”

Okay, let’s rewind for a bit of context.

Truly, you hated Lee Hyunjae. He was such a pretentious prick, always dead set on being right about everything. He couldn’t stand those who he felt were inferior to him, those who he thought were incompetent. If he felt you couldn’t do your job to his standards, he’d fire you on the spot.

Despite not being the CEO of the company himself, he practically carried all of the perks that came with the position. That was only because he was the actual CEO’s son and the future heir to the conglomerate his father owned.

You had the unfortunate pleasure of being his assistant, tied to doing his bidding until your contract with the company timed out. You originally applied for the job for two reasons. The first was due to the fact that you genuinely loved the initial purpose pushed forward by the CEO. He shared a lot of similar ideals with you and had spectacular visions for bettering the business world. The second was because at the time of your application, you wanted to be the CEO’s assistant. And that was what you’d gotten hired for.

It paid more than well enough and it was your dream job. You loved what you did for at least the first year and a half. Until he announced that he’d be retiring within the next couple years and his son would be taking over as a form of practice for being in charge when he inherited the entire conglomerate.

You’d never met him in person before, only hearing the high praises Mr. Lee had for his precious son. So on his first day, you had extremely raised expectations for the male. You dressed your best (not that you didn’t put effort in before) and put on your sweetest personality, wanting to make a good impression on your new boss.

Imagine the disappointment you felt when you realized he was nothing but an entitled asshole.

He made you feel stupid, as if you didn’t know how to do your own job. What started as sitting in on important meetings and going over different documents with Mr. Lee, turned into running errands for Hyunjae and cleaning up his messes. If you weren’t out buying his coffee or grabbing his dry cleaning, you were sorting his paperwork for him and making sure he was prepared for his upcoming conferences, as if he wasn’t capable of doing so himself. You felt like a fucking babysitter rather than an assistant; like an errand boy rather than an employee.

You were so incredibly tired and it had only been four months. A few, tortuous months of you being treated like you hadn’t already given an arm and a leg for this company. Half of you wanted to just throw in the towel, rip up the damn contract right in front of the fucker and walk out of those gold plated double doors for good.

“Just push through, Y/N,” Jacob sighs over the video call. “Your contract ends at the end of the year, and if you still feel like quitting, then that’s that. You don’t have to worry about renewing or trying to reinstate your job.”

You were on your lunch break, holed away in one of the many unused conference rooms on the top floor. Hyunjae was being extra irritating today and if you didn’t speak with a voice of reason, you thought you’d make a drastic decision that would alter the course of your life forever. Whether that was tossing your employee contract in the shredder, or committing premeditated murder, the world may never know. Shout out to Jacob Bae.

“What if I push him out of the floor-to-ceiling window in his office? I could make it look like an accident. Everyone would probably rejoice instead of mourning him, because we would all be so much happier.” You throw the back of your hand over your forehead. Well, that answers that.

“You’re not killing anyone. If you got caught, you wouldn’t look good in a prison jumpsuit. Orange isn’t your color.” Jacob shakes his head, rolling his eyes playfully.

You gasp scandalously, sitting upright to gape at him. “What the hell? Yes, I so would! I would make that prison jumpsuit my bitch—“

Someone clears their throat behind you, causing you to flinch, whipping around in your swivel chair to find the culprit. When it’s none other than Lee Hyunjae staring back at you, you feel like your life has just flashed before your eyes. You wonder just how much of that conversation he heard before making his presence known.

“Um, Cobie, I’m gonna have to call you back…” You don’t allow your friend time to respond, ending the call before he can incriminate you more than you already have.

Hyunjae leans against the doorframe, arms crossed over his absurdly broad chest. Did this guy have to wear the tightest dress shirts possible? Maybe it was time for him to update his wardrobe. You tuck your hair behind your ear, slowly standing up from the chair. His expression is unreadable, not that you ever had it easy when it came to understanding the many faces of Lee Hyunjae.

“Mr. Lee, what— uh— what can I do for you?” You ask with a slight waver in your tone. So much for not incriminating yourself. He purses his lips, taking a step closer to you.

“Juyeon can no longer accompany me on the trip to Tokyo next week. Which means you’re second on the totem pole,” he says simply, loosening his tie. “Better pack your bags, ‘cause I’m not taking no for an answer.”

This was horrible.

You were mentally cursing Lee Juyeon over and over. Why did he have to back out at the last minute? This was the one part of the job that you couldn’t allow yourself to do. You’d much rather drive in circles around Seoul and grab iced Americanos than be in a completely different country, with no other company aside from Lee Hyunjae himself.

When he gave you your demise, you immediately tried to get out of it. Your excuse was valid; you didn’t have a passport and that’s kind of essential when traveling to another country. But even then, it wasn’t enough to get you out of this predicament. Being the rich, influential man he was, Hyunjae had your passport expedited and sent to your mailbox within a couple days. You gave up after that.

There was nothing he couldn’t do.

Except maybe being tolerable. You think that was most likely his only fault. He could’ve been the complete package had he mastered the art of bedside manner. His father was one of the kindest, selfless men you’d ever met. You were often curious why those same traits didn’t translate to his son. Then again, he had probably been raised as a spoiled brat who got everything his heart desired.

To make matters worse, you had one of those suites with a Jack and Jill bathroom, meaning he could enter yours without difficulty if he wanted. You supposed that was because the rooms were reserved with him and Juyeon in mind. Perhaps the case would be different if you were the first pick for this trip.

You let out a deep exhale, waiting outside of the conference room that Hyunjae was currently in. This was meeting number seven, and the last of the day before you could finally go back to the hotel and relax. You’d be flying back to South Korea the following day on the Lees’ private jet. All of your time in Japan had been spent both sitting in and sitting out of board meetings, so much talk about business plans that you felt dizzy.

All you yearned for was a nice warm bath and some room service, wanting to call it an early night because of your flight in the morning. You were exhausted, eyes growing heavier and heavier the longer Hyunjae sat in that room full of old men that came from bloodlines of money. Even though it was your job to be here, you felt so out of place. There were moments you found yourself contemplating your career path. You were surrounded by people who could just sign a check to get rid of their life problems. That wasn’t you.

Before you can fall down a rabbit hole, the door to the conference room is swinging open and Hyunjae is storming out, some of the other board members calling after him. Your eyes widen and your eyebrows furrow, your body springing up to follow after him. Wearing some flats instead of heels was probably the smartest choice you’d made today, making it less of a struggle to chase after your boss.

“Mr. Lee!” You cup a hand around your mouth, trailing him like a lost puppy to the elevator. It closes before you can get on and you groan, running a hand through your hair frustratedly. As you wait for the next one down, you call the driver so the car is waiting out front. According to the recent weather notification on your phone, it was pouring outside.

The elevator dings when it arrives back at the floor you were on and you hurry to get on, pressing the lobby level aggressively in hopes it would move faster. Even the soothing music playing over the speakers isn’t enough to calm your nerves, picking at your nails as the numbers transition to the corresponding floors you pass. This was one of the numerous occasions you wished your boss wasn’t so impulsive. What did they even say to him in that meeting to cause such a reaction?

The doors open and you’re rushing out, frantically searching for Hyunjae in the lobby. You spot the driver parked under the carport, waiting. Your feet carry you to the car, knocking on the window to get his attention. He rolls it down with a confused look.

“Have you seen Mr. Lee?” You ask, a bit winded by all of the running you’d been doing.

“I thought I saw him walk that way,” he points ahead, though it hardly answers your question. “I didn’t realize you weren’t with him.”

Just fucking peachy. He was making you chase him into the rain now? You needed a pay raise.

Thankfully, it’s a breeze to spot him, since he’s the only person in the crowd without an umbrella. You pinch the bridge of your nose, forcing yourself to walk out into the cold rain, weaving through pedestrians to get to him faster. He’s not much further from you, but you’d rather drag his ass back to the car sooner rather than later, the precipitation seeping through your dress shirt and pants, chilling you to the bone.

“Mr. Lee!”

You reach for his wrist and wrap your fingers around it, yanking slightly to yield his focus. He turns around with hardened features, but they soften just enough for you to notice when he realizes that it’s you. Your lips form a flat line, eyelashes coated with a mixture of mascara and rain water, obscuring your vision.

“I don’t know what happened in there, but I don’t have it in me to ask. Please, can we just go back to the hotel?” You ask almost desperately, teeth beginning to chatter. He frowns, but nods nonetheless, letting you pull him to the safety of the carport— where you’re free from the unrelenting pelts against your body— and into the car.

You don’t say anything the whole drive to the hotel you’re staying at, biting your tongue because you were afraid you might blow up on him over his stupidity and get yourself fired. Your bottom lip quivers and you hug yourself for warmth, the car’s heater failing to bring back the color in your cheeks. In spite of hating nearly everything about him, you thought the one good thing Hyunjae had going for him was his wits. He might’ve been stuck up, but he was smart as hell. Except right now. In your books, he was the biggest idiot in the history of idiots.

The silence continues even after you’ve arrived at your hotel, shadowing you into the elevator and to your respective rooms. You don’t acknowledge him, unlocking your suite and entering to avoid any conversation. The remainder of your energy for the day was used when you were attempting to save him from getting fucking hypothermia.

You stand in the shower until your fingers have pruned, resting your forehead against the frosted glass as the scorching water battered your back, easing the tension in your muscles. While changing into your pajamas, your phone buzzes with a text message.

[9:23pm] mr. lee (DNI): i don’t know if u’ve eaten already, but i ordered a lot of food if u’d like to have some of it.

[9:24pm] mr. lee (DNI): left my bathroom door unlocked so u can just let urself in

Your lips purse as you mull over his offer. It wasn’t exactly an olive branch, but even if it was, you wouldn’t take it as such. You had too much pride for that. Instead you viewed this as him just feeling guilty for having you pursue him in the rain. That was definitely not in your job description. Perhaps he wasn’t as heartless as he made himself out to be, and he just didn’t know how to extend an apology without being awkward about it.

Reluctantly, you give in.

[9:27pm] you: sure. be right there

You slide your feet into your slippers and shuffle through the four doors between the two of you that lead to his suite. It takes everything in you to not visibly react to the difference between your rooms. His is so much more spacious, with enough room for a table and couches, aside from the usual desk. Even he looks expensive, a silk pajama set adorning his body— the first few buttons undone to give you a glimpse of his chest, though it hardly leaves room for the imagination.

Hyunjae sits at the table, various sushi roll platters in front of him. He holds up his chopsticks as he scrolls through his phone mindlessly, glancing up when your slippers shuffle against the floor. He takes in your appearance as quickly as he can without making it obvious, the corner of his lips curling up when he sees the teddy bears on your feet.

“You know, I didn’t think you’d come,” he starts after a few minutes of eating in an awkward quietness. “Not just here, to my room, but on the trip in general. I thought you’d put up a bigger fight to get out of it.”

“It’s part of my job, Mr. Lee.” You say flatly, taking away as much emotion from the statement as you could to avoid getting in an unnecessary argument.

“We’re not at work and it’s outside of working hours, Y/N. You can call me Hyunjae.” He tries to meet your eyes but they’re focused on picking at the skin around your nails, legs criss-crossed on your seat.

“Why do you go by Hyunjae?” You decide to ask, glancing up at him finally. “Your dad said your birth name was Jaehyun.”

“I don’t remember when exactly it was, but when I was in grade school, a classmate called me Hyunjae by accident and it just stuck. I’ve never really liked the name Jaehyun, if I’m being honest. It was a common name, and well, you of all people should know that I’m all about my individuality.” He leans back in his chair a bit, folding his arms over his chest. You ignore how it makes his pectorals squish together. God, you were no better than man…

“Is that why you’re nothing like your father?” You don’t mean to say that out loud. The thought popped into your head, as it always does, and for some reason this time it just shimmies its way through your mouth. You press your lips together, shifting uncomfortably at the sudden tension that arises in the room.

“I’m well aware of what you think of me, Y/N,” he chides, tapping his fingers against his biceps. “You may think you’re good at hiding it, but I’m very perceptive. And I also overheard that conversation with your friend— the one where you were plotting my assassination and whatnot.”

“Are you open to rebuttal?” Perhaps you should just stop talking, maybe pause the hole you were digging yourself into. Did you want to keep your job? Sure this was all off the record, but be fucking for real, it was Hyunjae you were speaking with.

He shrugs. “Shoot. Let’s hear it.”

“You’re kind of a narcissist,” you kick off strong, hitting him right where you think it may hurt. “You don’t take in the consideration of others, and you always have to be correct. If someone even slightly disagrees with you, you lose your shit. You’re condescending, you’re a perfectionist, you’re hot headed, and after the stunt you pulled today, you’ve exhibited that you’re also really fucking irrational. I’ve done so much in the time I’ve been with the company prior to you, I’ve given so much of myself for the improvement that your father was aiming for and you took all that hard work and crushed it between your fingers, just to have me running around like I’m your maid.”

Hyunjae wears an amused smirk on his lips, like he couldn’t be bothered with your grievances. Your eye practically twitches, irritation boiling up like water ready for a pasta dinner. You stab your chopsticks into a piece of sushi with a raised eyebrow.

“You’re cute when you get worked up,” he hums, carding a hand through his hair. “I almost want to keep my thoughts to myself.”

You choke on your saliva, smacking yourself on the chest to regain control of your breathing. Whatever you were expecting him to say wasn’t that. Should he even be calling you that? He was your boss. Not just that, but you sort of hated everything there was to hate about him. The tiny compliment shouldn’t make both of your heartbeats quicken.

“W-What are you talking about?”

Hyunjae stands from his chair, walking around the table to sit on the edge of the desk in the room, not much further away but enough distance to keep you calm. He rolls his neck, scratching at the nape to relieve some of the awkwardness seeping into the suite. “My father has done nothing but sing your praises since he hired you. I know how capable you are of this job, Y/N. I know that you’ve accomplished more than individuals who have been with the company even longer than you. Trust me, I know.”

“Then why do you discard me the way you do? Why do you treat me like I don’t know what I’m doing?” This time you don’t stop the emotions from creeping beneath your words, your voice cracking just slightly. If Hyunjae heard, he makes no effort to show it.

“Because, I had to keep myself as far from you as possible,” he admits, finally making eye contact. “From the moment I laid eyes on you, I was fucked. I knew I wouldn’t be able to control myself around you and as your boss, I couldn’t do that. As my father’s son, I couldn’t do that. So I resorted to the next best thing, making you hate me and having you do shitty side tasks to separate myself from you. I thought, ‘If she thinks I’m the worst boss ever, she’ll want nothing to do with me’. And that’s exactly what my goal was. But now you’re here in Tokyo, alone with me in my hotel room and I’m starting to rethink that decision.”

You stare at him— mouth agape, heart in your throat. Once upon a time, you believed Lee Hyunjae was one of the brightest, smartest businessmen of your generation. It seemed that he just wanted to go and prove you wrong on that today, in multiple instances. How could someone be so fucking stupid? You were genuinely curious what went through his head.

“You’re unbelievable,” you scoff, a laugh devoid of humor sneaking in along with it as you stand from your own chair. “Actually unbelievable. What made you think that was a good idea? You made me feel like I wasn’t good enough to be in this position because you didn’t think you could keep it in your pants around me?”

And just as you’re about to leave, he wraps his fingers around your wrist to stop you. You were getting a weird sense of déjà vu. He pulls you into his chest, your body sandwiched between his legs as he holds you close to him. Your eyes are wide and your lips are parted. (Though you don’t know if it’s out of shock, sudden arousal, or both.)

In this proximity, you can see every small detail of his face. From the freckle on the bridge of his nose to the thick eyelashes framing dark eyes to the softness of his lips. You’ve never had the opportunity to properly look at Hyunjae, always too pissed off to even be within ten feet of him. But standing here— face-to-face, eye-to-eye— you’re starting to wish the object of your hatred and many complaints wasn't so handsome.

“If you push me away now, I’ll leave you alone forever,” he breathes, hands fisting the material of your pajama top, as if that would ground him. “If you tell me there’s absolutely no possibility of you wanting me back, I’ll let you go back to your room like none of this happened.”

You don’t respond. The words are right there. They’re perched on the tip of your tongue, just anticipating to climb out of your mouth and put him in his place. It’s been months of constantly feeling like you were meaningless to the company you’ve given so many sleepless nights to— months of second guessing just how much you’ve actually contributed. But with one glance down to your lips with eyes resembling the night sky, Hyunjae has managed to wipe all of that from your memory.

So instead of turning around— instead of walking through the four doors that divide your hotel rooms— you stay planted between his thighs, grabbing the sides of his face and pulling his lips onto your own.

He groans into the kiss, tightening his grip on your shirt and bringing you closer to him. You feel him against your stomach, hard and ready for you, ready for any contact you’re willing to give him. It’s so much and too little at the same time, fingers slipping beneath your top and searing your skin.

He nips at your bottom lip, as if asking for permission to permeate your mouth with his tongue. You welcome the wet muscle with gratitude, moaning when it tangles with yours. The blunt edges of his nails dig into your lower back when the sound hits his ears. You tug at the hairs on the base of his neck, one hand sliding down the front of his body to feel him up.

Through the thin silk of his pajamas you can make out the outline of his sculpted torso. If Hyunjae was more coherent and less intoxicated by your lips on his, he’d tease you for your desperation. But because he's neither of those, he, too, finds himself clawing at every bit of fabric of your clothing he can, longing to touch anything he can get his hands on. You feel drunk, and you wonder if he makes you feel like this with his lips alone, what else can he do?

The straps of your top fall off your shoulders the longer you stand there, making out like it was second nature to both of you. When you take a step back to catch your breath, lips swollen and glistening with a mixture of both yours and his saliva. Your chests are heaving up and down, foreheads resting on the other’s.

“Can I take that as a yes?” Hyunjae rasps, pushing your straps further down your arms. You whine, connecting your mouths again. This was embarrassing enough, you didn’t want to have to say the words out loud. Saying it out loud made this real, and you didn’t want to accept the fact that you were about to fuck your boss.

He chuckles against your lips, undoing the buttons of his shirt without parting from your kiss. You help him toss it somewhere in the room, your hands groping his arms and squeezing his biceps. He spins the two of you around so you’re the one with the edge of the desk on your back. His arms hook under your thighs, placing you on the surface so it’s less strain on his neck as he leans down.

You instinctively spread your legs to make room for him, throwing your head back with a drawn out sigh when he presses two fingers to your core. Even with your panties and your flimsy pajama shorts in the way, the pressure relieves some of the ache you feel in your gut. Your top slips off enough that your bare breasts are now on full display for Hyunjae. He keeps circling your clit through your clothes, mouth enveloping one of your peaked nipples and tongue swirling around the sensitive bud.

“C-Can’t hold on anymore,” you whimper. “Need to cum on your cock.”

Something shifts in Hyunjae when he hears you beg. You’d always been so set in stone when it came to standing your ground, so for you to surrender yourself to him, in spite of reiterating how much you despise him, it did a number on his sanity. You have no idea what you’ve just done to him.

“No foreplay? Think you can handle it, sweetheart?” He goads, but his fingers dip into the waistband of both your underwear and your shorts to pull them down your legs anyway.

“You’re talking a whole lot for someone who’s still wearing their pants.” You bite back, but almost immediately retract your words when he rids them, revealing that he wasn’t wearing anything underneath them. No fucking wonder you could feel him so much.

He’s huge, like so huge you kind of regret skipping the foreplay. But it was too late to go back now, your pride as big as his dick. One of your hands reaches to wrap around his length, your teeth finding purchase on your lip as you stroke him gently. Every pulse and every vein beneath your touch has you curling your toes in excitement. He hisses when your thumb swipes over his tip, collecting the precum that’s formed there.

Hyunjae drags you closer to the edge, prying your legs wider so he fits perfectly between them. You guide him to your entrance, a moan ripping from your throat when he presses into you. He’s not even fully sheathed inside of you, but the stretch is so fucking delicious, stinging just enough that it provides pleasure rather than pain. He pulls out to drive back in and repeats, a little deeper each time he does.

When he bottoms out, his hips snap into yours, large hands keeping your thighs apart as he begins to thrust into you. His cock is snug within your warm walls, kissing so deep inside that you start to see stars well before the coil in your abdomen has begun to wind up. The noises leaving your mouth are insane, loud and echoing throughout the hotel room. It made shame bubble up in your chest, because why couldn’t your detestation overpower the urge to crumble at his fingertips?

“Fuck you’re so tight,” Hyunjae groans, eyes concentrated on where his cock slips in and out of you. “You needed this, huh? Needed me to fuck you real good? Like a filthy slut?”

You’ve never thought you’d be into degradation. In fact, a man calling you demeaning names actually pissed you off. So you felt like you’d end up picking a fight if ever in the situation where someone tried to degrade you. However, the words falling from Hyunjae’s lips have the opposite effect on you. They have you clenching around him and mewling like a goddamn pornstar.

His pace is relentless, inching you closer and closer to your breaking point. He lays you flat on the desk, one hand gripping your hip and the other sneaking to your clit. His thumb rubs ovular motions into the engorged skin, his body folding over yours to capture your lips with his. He swallows your cries when your climax washes over you suddenly, your walls fluttering around his cock.

Hyunjae pulls out before he can follow suit, flipping you onto your stomach like you were a fucking pancake. He bends you over the edge of the desk as his thumb continues to circle your clit slowly, languidly just to ride out your high. He propels forward, his dick still so hard as it breaches your hole once again. He curses, extra sensitive after depriving himself of his own orgasm.

You push back on him, wanting to feel him even deeper. Your whole body burns beneath him, his chest slick with sweat as it presses you flat to the desk. You need him everywhere, God you want him everywhere. It’s not enough to have him buried inside of you. You need to be one with him; one body, one mind, one soul. You need him filling your senses— blinding your sight, obstructing your scent, stealing your touch, invading your taste, muting your hearing.

Okay, now let’s resume.

“I— fuck— I do,” you whine, back arching off of the desk and into his chest. “I hate you s-so goddamn much.”

“Yeah? I’m sure you do. You hate me so much, yet you want me to fuck you full of my cum, don’t you? Gonna let me finish inside you?” His voice is exerted, and you can tell he’s close. But you are too, so you’re not above pleading for your sweet release. Not when it rewards you so well.

“Mhm,” you whimper, cheek smushed to the surface under you. “Please, Jae… Need it so— oh my god— need it s-o bad.”

Hyunjae hikes one of your knees onto the desk, allowing him to plunge extensively. Your clit bumps the edge, that coil in your stomach fracturing little by little until it’s busted completely and you’re a babbling, incomprehensible mess. The sight of you fucked absolutely stupid tips Hyunjae into his own spiral, painting your velvety walls with thick ropes of his cum. He lets his forehead fall on your shoulder, rocking into you with delayed groans as he spills all he has to offer you. It’s so much that even his cock plugging you up isn’t sufficient to keep it from dribbling along your thighs.

You’re both too winded to move, much less fathom what just happened. You feel him panting on your back, eyes shut as you also attempt to regain your bearings. Where the hell do you go from here?

“H-Hyunjae…” You wince when he stirs inside of you. “Can— uh— can you pull out?”

He grunts as he carefully does what you’ve asked, running a hand down his face when more of his release trickles out of you. He knew you couldn’t afford another round. Just by looking at you he can see how spent you are. What you needed was another bath and some good rest. Without skipping a beat, he reaches out to tuck some strands of your hair that were stuck to your face behind your ear, wiping away the sweat that glued itself there.

“We have a lot to talk about,” he says, grasping your hands and caressing the backs with his thumbs. “But that can wait until tomorrow. For now, just let me take care of you, okay?”

“Okay.” You agree, tone no more voluminous than a whisper.

You did have a lot to discuss pertaining to tonight, but that wasn’t a priority at the moment. Who really cared that you supposedly hated your boss? All you could focus on was how gentle his fingers were as he washed your body for you, massaging your muscles so delicately you might as well have melted in the palms of his hands. And all you could pay attention to was the hushed sound of his voice as he kissed your temple and lulled you to sleep, within the comfort of his arms.

Yeah. You could revisit the whole Lee Hyunjae hatred train another day.

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