#and look who's all alone with no one who loves them.....wonder why
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chibinasuu · 3 days ago
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Hi, I was wondering if you could do Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji (separately) X Reader, and it's of them already in a relationship, and kind of based on the trend on TikTok, Reader calls them "Buddy" to see their reaction?
hi!! sorry this took so long, i just returned from a trip and didn’t have much time to write at all last week. thanks for the request, this was so fun to write! this was my first time writing short drabbles like this, but i hope i captured the boys’ reactions well :)
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“Buddy” | Monster Trio x Reader
Pairings: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji x Reader (separate)  Tags: sfw, fluff, established relationship, GN but written with F!Reader in mind, no use of y/n
Sanji
The lid to the peanut butter jar was exceptionally tight that morning. 
You glanced at Sanji, who was trying and failing to prevent his lips from turning up into a mischievous smirk. You rolled your eyes as a small huff escaped your mouth.
Did he seriously think you wouldn’t catch on to his little schemes? You had long been aware that he’d sometimes purposefully tighten the lids to all of the jars in the kitchen just so you would ask him for help. 
After struggling for a good few seconds, you finally relented and passed the jar to him, “Open this for me, please?”
Sanji beamed at you, “Why, of course, dearest! With pleasure.” 
He popped the lid open with ease and handed the jar back to you.
You took it gratefully but couldn’t resist the temptation of getting back at him in some way. So, as you walked away, you patted his shoulder and said lightly, “Thanks, buddy!”
You instantly regretted it when you saw Sanji’s crestfallen expression, “...Buddy?”
He looked like he was close to tears as he searched your face, “A-are you mad at me? Is this about the jars? I promise I won't do it aga–” 
His small voice broke you and you immediately rushed back to him, “Oh sweetheart, no, I’m just joking!” 
You planted a kiss on his cheek, “I’m sorry, honey.” You moved your lips to his other cheek, “Baby.” To his forehead, “Darling.”
He let out a relieved sigh at the return of your usual repertoire of nicknames, before squishing your cheeks in between his hands, “Don’t ever call me buddy again. Please.” 
You chuckled, “Yes, my love.” 
He nodded, satisfied at your answer, before leaning in and melding his lips to yours in the sweetest kiss.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Zoro
“Hey, can you pass me the towel?” 
You were sitting on the bench of the crow’s nest, quietly reading your book as Zoro spent hours after hours working out. This was the first instance that he had spoken to you in all that time, which was no surprise, really. You knew that he took his workout very seriously.
But, you couldn’t deny that it still annoyed you to no end that he had not glanced even once in your direction this whole time, despite this being one of the rare moments that the two of you could spend alone onboard this rowdy ship. 
“Sure.” You reached for the towel beside you and tossed it in his direction, “Here you go, buddy!”
“Thank–” Zoro started to reply before he registered your words. He looked at you, his face contorted in what you could only describe as disgust, “Ha?!”
You smirked at how readily he took your bait, watching him closely as he wiped off his sweat and stalked toward you. He placed his hands on the bench on either side of you, caging you in as he bent forward to bring his face close to yours, “What did you just call me?”
“What, you don't like my new nickname for you, buddy?” You taunted, fully realizing that this would piss him off even further.
“Oh, am I your buddy, now?” He pressed his body even closer to yours, an intense look in his eyes as he said, “Well, would a buddy do this, then?” 
Your heart danced in victory when his lips finally captured yours in a hungry kiss, and you wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him down onto the bench.
Maybe you should rile him up more often.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Luffy
Luffy was sitting at his usual spot at the figurehead when you approached him. 
The conversation you had with Nami earlier still plagued your mind. She had told you that men hated to be called “buddy” by their significant other, but you were pretty sure that Luffy wouldn’t mind at all. He had liked all of the nicknames you gave him so far, no matter how ridiculous they were. She laughed and disagreed, telling you that Luffy was a man after all, and there was no way he would not be affected in some way. 
So, that’s how you ended up climbing the stairs to the figurehead, on your way to test Nami’s theory. 
“Hey, buddy!” You called out to Luffy.
His head tilted in confusion as he turned to face you, before replying uncertainly, “Hey to you too… buddy.”
Well, how the table had turned. You didn’t expect him to call you "buddy” back. And you didn’t like it. At all. 
“Ugh.” You groaned as you sat down beside him, “Forget that. Please don’t call me buddy.” 
He pouted, “Hey, you said it first!” 
You chuckled and caressed his cheek, your thumb lightly grazing over his scar, “My bad, turned out I don’t like it when you called me that.” 
“Well, I don’t like it either.” He shrugged as he admitted, “It made me feel like I was just your friend. And I’m not… right?” 
So Nami was right. It did affect him.
“You’re right, I’m sorry." You smiled, somehow filled with a strange satisfaction, as you pulled him in for a quick kiss, "You're definitely more than just my buddy, Lu.”
You kept his face close to yours as you said, “I promise I won’t call you buddy ever again if you promise not to call me buddy too.”
Luffy laughed before closing the gap between you again, “Deal!”
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bonefall · 1 day ago
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"How big should a Clan territory be?"
For the dozens of people who have asked this over the last couple of years!
This question comes in a lot of forms; "How big are the Clan territories?" "How much space does one Clan need?" "How much land should I give my Clans to exist in?" The answer is a bit complicated, and depends on the type of land, what you're going for exactly, the setting, so on.
But, broadly, there's TWO particular factors at play here; How anthropomorphic you're portraying your warriors, and how productive the land is.
Factor 1: The Anthro Scale
I'm starting with this one because it could you the simpler answer. The Erins write Clan cats like humans in cat bodies, with massive social units and communal living. Realistic feral cats don't act like Clan cats. They are only semi-social, due to domestication.
See, a Clan cat will "share" territory between all of its members, and some Clans have canonically hit populations of over 50 individuals. Real feral colonies consist of "overlapping circles" of somewhere between 2 - 15 cats, most of them related females.
This is relevant because, even in densely populated areas with as much food as they can eat, truly feral colonies will have about 2 cats per 5 acres, capping out at about 15 members. Queens will hang out together and raise their kittens communally, but they will hunt and patrol in their own "circle." These boundaries are violently enforced against outside cats, especially if it's too crowded.
(Toms have circles 5x as big as a queen's, overlapping several territories. They're also considerably less social.)
So, if you wanted to incorporate some cat behavior into your Clan's mindset about how big their territory should be, while still being willing to sacrifice a bit of "realism" for groups over 15-ish members, simply take Clan population and multiply it by 2.5 acres.
30 cats = 75 acres. That's a little under 57 football fields, if you're American, or 50 football fields, if you're European.
Extra reading: How realistic cat territories work. Contains the numbers I'm referencing.
It's also very important to know; feral cat density is completely tied to food availability, the big numbers numbers are for cats whose needs are met. Cats are solitary hunters, and when they feel like they have to work for their food, they become VERY territorial. The density of cats in rural areas can be as low as 1 molly per 15 acres, even lower for toms, and they will leave if hunting is not easy.
THIS IS WHY YOU SHOULD NOT FEED FERAL CATS. Please GOD they are SO invasive, please do not give colonies food, they still hunt when they're full so you just end up concentrating a ton of predators in one place. They are not warriors with a law against disrespecting food, they are just kitty cats with silly kitty instincts
I have a suspicion that most of the people who are asking the question aren't really looking for a "realistic cat" answer, though. We LOVE our big cat Clans with their complicated politics around here. You're probably wondering how much land you need to feed your population!
Factor 2: Land Productivity
The exact amount of space is going to vary a lot, because it's more about productivity of the land to sustain a prey population than it is raw size. Remember what we learned back in Warrior Bites: Dietary Needs; a 30-cat Clan will need approximately 3 pounds of meat (10,500 calories) per day, which is about 2 rabbits, or 105 mice.
Here's some visual examples of what I mean. This one (1) acre homestead...
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Has 20 patches of high-value crops, plus an orchard, AND livestock pens. This territory alone could attract enough crows, mice, rats, rabbits, and sparrows to feed all those cats daily. That's not even counting the humans themselves, who may be friendly enough to the colony to toss them kibble occasionally.
(this is why cats domesticated themselves. Even without the free food from the humans, farms are extremely productive hunting grounds.)
Meanwhile, the Edmonton Mall, which is a whopping five (5) acres...
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Would be utterly barren. Best food you're going to get out of this wasteland is the leftovers humans toss out, and maybe the rats and pigeons that scavenge as well. It's 5x the space, and yet, infinitely harder to feed the same amount of cats.
So, the most helpful bit of advice I'm gonna give you is this; DON'T ask yourself "how big should this territory be?" You're starting with the wrong question. Start with a real location, and think about how you'd find 3 pounds of meat a day in that area.
It will be a LOT easier to think about the logistics in those terms, and this will lead you to the waaay more productive (and fun) worldbuilding questions. Such as;
"Where would the good hunting spots be?"
"What kinds of animals would they be eating? What sorts of beasts can threaten them, here?"
"How many of these animals would my 30 cat Clan need to hunt a day to equal about 3 pounds?"
"Where would these animals be getting THEIR food?"
"Is there enough habitat in the area for the prey to breed and nest? If not, is there more land beyond the territory that the prey is coming from?"
"Where would infrastructure like dens, walls, and dirtplaces go? What would these be made of?"
"Are there any neat spots for the cats to casually hang out on?"
"What would make for a super cool arena for my climactic narrative boss fights?"
"Does this area have unique stage hazards that my cats would have to learn to deal with?"
"Which sorts of plants and herbs would they encounter?"
If your Clan is tool-using, like BB!Clans are, then you can ask even more advanced questions. Like, where you'd find kindle for fire, what objects you can use as crafting materials, and what might make for unique trade goods.
Think about other things related to your Clan's biome-- in a tundra or desert, there will be less for prey to eat, so the territory will be large to cope with the low density. If there's a major body of water, they might have a constant supply of aquatic prey from upstream. Hunting grounds might change based on the seasons.
Also remember not to underestimate how fast small animals breed, and how many of them there can be in one area. Even using low estimates, 1 female mouse has 6 pups, 7 x 6 = 42, 42 x 6 = 252, 252 x 6 = 1,452. It takes only 4 months for mouse population growth to get exponentially ridiculous.
Finally, remember that prey can vary. A well run Clan would be able to generally understand when they've been overhunting one particular species, and start shifting gears to lift the "pressure" off that population.
(In my cultural expansions series, this management task is assigned to one of the new roles-- the Head of Hunting.)
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for-ests · 2 days ago
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Fine Line: Gojo Satoru x Reader
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summary: friends to lovers, gojo is in love with the campus doctor, and can't hide it any longer. lovesick gojo is my favvveee<3 wc: 4.4k warnings: fluff then SMUT ^^
Once again, Gojo was in your office in the middle of the night.
"What time is it?" you asked, borderline scolded, but refrained from rolling your eyes. After every mission, he would make an excuse to find his way onto your hospital bed. And every single time, he had nothing more than minor scrapes and bruises but would always insist you look over him "just in case."
"Late, I know." He looked somewhat guilty.
"Was this curse too strong for the students again?" you teased, reaching for your gloves but not bothering to put them on. One glance at Gojo, and you knew. You just knew he was there for a different reason. The white-haired sorcerer wasn't physically hurt. He rarely ever was. But now, his excuses to see you were becoming apparent to you and others.
"You could say that." He shook his head, forcing himself to release a chuckle. He was about to cross a very fine line, one that was established the day he met you. But he was only a man, and he needed to at least try and quell the need he felt for you.
It was internal, and Gojo felt like you were one of the only people who truly saw him and took the time to listen to him. After all these years of admiring you in silence, he still couldn't come clean with it. Every time he visited you, his heart twisted with an unquenchable yearning, feeling betrayed and played by fate. He was lost in a sea of emotions, unable to make sense of it all. Despite the turmoil of his everyday life, despite the responsibility that weighed on his shoulders, he found solace in your presence. 
Would it ever go away?
You were like a beacon in the darkness of his world. Your smile illuminated the space, radiating warmth and energy that seemed to chase away the shadows that clouded his mind. Despite having the attention of any woman he could dream of, he could not tear his gaze away from you. Why couldn't he leave you alone? Why couldn't he get you out of his head?
"Y/N, look at me," he called out softly, his voice warm and inviting. It was a desperate plea to draw your attention away from your surroundings and towards the turmoil that raged within his soul.
Catching the seriousness of his tone, you froze, setting down your prep materials. Your eyes carefully rose to meet his, and you almost gasped. Gojo, the strongest man you knew, was on the verge of tears.
“Are you feeling okay?” you asked, almost getting lost in the blue of his glistening eyes. It had always been hard for you to hold his gaze for long, as the intensity of his stare made you flustered. You often wondered if he looked at anyone else like this, talked to them like this, touched them like he had you.
Breath catching in his throat, Gojo saw the subtle hint of concern on your face—it was endearing. You seemed so beautiful and so caring, and it only added to his feeling of helplessness. 
Gently, he grasped your hand and placed it over his heart, letting you feel the rapid beat that betrayed his inner turmoil.
"I'm fine," he said quietly, a hint of vulnerability in his usually confident tone. "But can you do something for me?"
“W-what?” you asked, feeling his heartbeat, which was definitely faster than usual. The fabric of his shirt bunched between your fingertips. 
Gojo continued to hold your gaze; his grip on your hand was gentle but firm. 
"Can you... just sit with me for a moment? I need your company right now," he said, slightly hoarse. “I don’t wanna leave here again without saying what I really feel…” 
“Oh, okay.” You blinked, eyebrows creased as you joined him on the hospital bed. 
Your professionalism vanished as you noticed the glassy forlornness in his beautiful blue eyes. Sitting next to him, you leaned into his embrace. 
After a moment of silence, you asked, “Did something happen?” Your finger traced the outside of his palm to try to soothe him further. God… his hands were so soft despite how large and powerful they were.
Gojo let out a deep breath as he felt you lean against him, the weight of your body against his. It was perfect. He closed his eyes for a moment, relishing the comfort your presence provided. He opened his eyes again at your question and looked down at your joined hands. Friends didn’t touch each other like this, right? 
"It's...complicated," he said, his voice quiet after a moment. "I just... need a distraction from my thoughts right now. Your company is enough."
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips at your comfort, one that sent a jolt of electricity through him. You had always been enough, and he had always loved you. Now, it was just impossible to ignore.
“Talking about it can be the best cure and distraction,” you whispered, faintly smiling back at him. “You know you can tell me anything, Satoru, I will never think of you differently.”
Those simple words from your lips were like a balm to his wounded soul. Gojo felt a lump form in his throat as he looked at you, a mixture of gratitude and affection filling his chest.
"You're too kind," he murmured, his voice low and heavy with emotion. "But this...this could change everything between us."
He raised his free hand and gently brushed a stray piece of hair away from your face.
You sighed blissfully in response. Just the faintest touch from him flustered you. It was so tender, and you wanted more. You always savored any physical moment you had with him. God, you were so infatuated with him, and he didn't even know it.
Gojo's eyes followed the path his finger traced across your cheek, and he couldn't help but notice your reaction. He felt a pang in his chest as he saw the way your body responded to his touch, practically melting against him. Was there a chance you felt the same?
"You're blushing," he whispered, a hint of amusement in his voice. He let his hand linger on your cheek, his thumb tracing small circles almost absentmindedly.
"How can I not when you touch me like this?" you responded breathlessly, unable to tear your eyes away from his.
Gojo's heart skipped a beat at your words, your sudden drunken response sending a shiver down his spine. He hadn't meant to affect you so much, but the sight of you so needy was an incredible feeling.
"I can't help it," he murmured, his thumb starting to trace the line of your jaw. "Your reactions are just too cute."
You felt like your heart was about to burst. He always looked so handsome, and you felt like an infatuated schoolgirl whenever he was around, whenever you two were alone. How immature of you; you were supposed to be working. But it was the best part of your day when you were tending to Gojo, which was far more often than you preferred. It also made you feel guilty. You didn't want him to get hurt, it was the last thing you ever wanted. You knew it wasn't normal for him to be touching you like this, for you to reciprocate in the same manner, as these actions crossed the boundary of just friends and coworkers. But maybe you were both more comfortable with this label, even if it pulled at your heartstrings. If Gojo had wanted you, he would have made that clear years ago, right?
Gojo was keenly aware of how you blushed and stuttered in his presence, filling him with a sense of satisfaction that he couldn't quite identify with. The power he had over you was intoxicating. But still, there was a part of him that wanted more, that wanted to cross the line you had set for yourselves.
As you sat there next to him, close enough for your thighs to touch, he found himself fighting the urge to reach out and pull you closer, to bury his face in your hair and breathe in your scent.
His compliment caused you to giggle slightly and glance away. But you didn't retreat from his embrace and only squeezed his hand a little tighter. "Will you tell me what's wrong?" you pressed again. "Why do you want me to distract you?"
Gojo's heart ached. He almost felt sick at how badly he wanted you to be his. But your insistence made it difficult to keep secrets, and refusing any of your requests felt impossible.
Still debating whether confessing was right, he hesitated momentarily before answering. "It's just... life," he finally said, his voice soft and low. "The weight of being the strongest. The pressure. The kids always looking up to me...It can be overwhelming sometimes."
"I'm sure it can be," you said, biting your lip slightly. "You often come here when you want a distraction." You glanced at the gauze and disinfection you had intended to use on his superficial wounds. "You pretend you're more hurt than you are physically. But you just want to vent to me, right?"
It was obvious, after all. Gojo could heal himself if he wanted to. You knew that, and so did everyone.
Gojo's shoulders sagged as he recognized the truth in your words. It was childish of him, possibly even cowardly. The pain he felt from battle was nothing compared to the ache in his heart whenever he was away from you.
He let out a sigh and nodded, his eyes meeting yours again. “You know me too well,” he said quietly. “But yes. I guess I just needed to talk to you. You make everything feel easier.”
"You should ask me to hang out with you more often," you chuckled. "I know we're both busy, but I can make time for you, Satoru. There's no need to pretend."
Gojo felt a pang of guilt at your words. You were right, he should have just asked you to hang out with him more often instead of resorting to these tactics.
"Yeah," he admitted, his voice soft. "I shouldn't have used my injuries as an excuse. I just...like having you around."
He looked down at your joined hands, his thumb rubbing your knuckles. "Can I ask you something?"
Frowning slightly, you wondered if he had misinterpreted your words by the expression on his face. You didn't want him to feel guilty at all, if anything, you found his visits endearing. He refused to see any doctor but you, which instilled pride in your work. It had become a joke between your coworkers and you, all betting on whether Gojo had a crush on you.
"You can ask me anything." You set your free hand on his knee. You wanted to touch more of him so badly, not under the guise of treating his minor scratches and bruises.
His heart skipped a beat, and he couldn't help but relish the feeling of your touch. Taking a deep breath, he gathered the courage to ask the question that had been on his mind for so long.
"Why... why are you always there for me? Why do you treat my wounds no matter how small? I mean... you have others to look at... but you always come to me." He looked at you, his heart thudding in his chest as he waited for your answer.
"I guess you caught me, too." You blushed, feeling bashful and somewhat embarrassed that he noticed your antics. "Maybe I want to spend whatever time I can with a busy man like yourself."
Gojo's heart fluttered as you admitted to caring for him just as much as he cared for you. He had hoped it was the case, but hearing you confirm it felt like a weight had lifted off his chest.
He chuckled softly, using both hands to hold your face, so incitingly that you didn't even think to pull away. "You know you don't have to use my injuries as an excuse to see me, right? I always want to spend time with you, no matter how busy I am."
His reply was enough for you. You understood what he meant in his repetition of your own words. It was in how he touched you, how his eyes sparkled with relief. Nervously, your eyes flickered down to his lips. He was so close, and what you craved was only one movement away. But no, you wouldn’t kiss him first. You needed to have more restraint than this. 
“Is this your way of saying you like me more than a friend?” you asked, looking up at him through your eyelashes.
Your question was answered in the way his breath caught in his throat, in the way his gaze trailed down to your lips and back up to your eyes. He was mesmerized by you, drawn in like a moth to a flame.
"Yes," he replied, his voice barely above a whisper. "I do. I yearn to be near you more often than I dare to admit, I tried to resist but I can't anymore."
Gojo's heart thundered in his chest as your eyes widened in response.
“I feel the same," you said, your admission causing a shiver to run down his spine.
"You... you do?" he murmured, tilting his face a little closer to yours. He wanted to be closer to you, to feel your skin against his; holding your hand wasn’t enough. 
Your eyes flickered to Gojo’s lips again, your stare begging and pleading. The need for something more was evident. “I do.”
Suddenly, he felt emboldened by your words, his own feelings mirrored in your body language.
Gojo's breath hitched as he noticed the palpable desire in your gaze. It was physically impossible to resist any longer.
Leaning in, he closed the distance between you, his lips hovering millimeters from yours. "Say it again," he murmured, his voice rough with emotion.
“Fuck Satoru,” you practically whined, your eyes closing, lulled by his gentle touch and the inches that teased between you. “I love you, okay?"
Gojo felt a shudder run down his spine at the sound of his name on your lips, the desperation in your voice sending a wave of heat through him. You loved him.
With a low groan, he closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a deep kiss. His hand on your cheek gently tilted your head, allowing him to claim your lips hungrily.
Moaning into the kiss, you inhaled deeply, satisfied to finally taste him, to finally give in to your desires. One of your hands reached out and gripped his bicep, drawing him closer against your own body.
Gojo deepened the kiss further, a thrill shooting through him as he felt the heat of your body even through his clothes, and it fueled his need for more.
His tongue traced your bottom lip, demanding entry to your mouth, as his other hand trailed up your hip, grasping with need. A low moan escaped him as he tasted you, feeling you submit to his tune, his body responding to your touch like a taut bowstring.
You were on the verge of shuddering, desire pooling in that oh-so-dangerous spot, the part of you that might lose all sense of control and decency. Your feelings for Gojo were intense and had been for some time. You still couldn't believe this was happening. Anything he wanted from you was his to take. Anything to make him feel better. 
One of your hands rested against his neck while the other ran through his white locks, refusing to let him go, wanting him to touch you further. Nobody else was in the office, it was just the two of you. You were so starved of affection from the one you desired the most, that you would take any moment you could get.
Gojo seemed to realize at the same time, and he couldn’t control himself as he picked you up and brought you over to rest against your desk. With one hand, he swiped the belongings off and onto the floor, gently guiding you until you were on your back, legs wrapping tightly around his waist. 
Hungrily, he kissed you again; his own body was on fire as you giggled at his erratic, desperate movements as if he couldn't get enough. It was as if he wanted to worship every part of you now that you’d given him permission.  
"Y/N," he whispered against your mouth, his voice rough with need. "I want you. More than anything. I love you too."
"T-take me..." you whimpered, staring deep into his eyes as your lab coat fell loosely around your shoulders. To see him so desperate for you, the yearning of his tone and the affection in his glacier-blue eyes was all it took for your own restraint to fade away.
An almost primal hum of approval vibrated in his throat. "Right here?" he murmured, his breath hot against your lips. "On the desk?" His fingers dug into the flesh of your hips, his body pressing yours against the cold wood of the desk.
Nodding furiously at how hot this would be, you nodded to the door. "I don't want to wait any longer," you whispered seductively, reaching out to brush your delicate hands against the growing tent in Gojo's pants. "And I don't think you want to either."
Gojo let out a shaky breath at your coyness. His control was fraying quickly, and he knew this was a battle he was going to lose.
Nodding, he reached for the light switch, plunging the office into semi-darkness. He then moved to the door, locking it with a decisive click. When he turned back to you, his eyes were dark with desire.
"You're driving me crazy," he murmured, stalking back towards you. 
You spread your legs back apart, hooking them around his waist once he reached your awaiting embrace. Grasping his face, you pulled him back on top of you. "You made me wait too long for this," you teased, though still strained with a yearning he only noticed through subtle hints throughout the months, almost a year, that you’d known each other. It had been in your eyes, through quick glances, but never in your words.
Just the sound of your voice and the longing within it made him shudder. 
He pressed his bulge against your core, his hands sliding up under your shirt. "I wanted you this whole time," he whispered, his voice rough with desire. "You have no idea how much I want you." His lips moved to the sensitive skin of your neck, nipping and sucking at your pulse point.
Sighing blissfully, your hands found their way back into his hair, holding him against you as if he would escape, as if this was only a dream. 
"What took you so long?" you mumbled, slightly dazed, then gasped as Gojo's fingers hooked the band of your bra. You shrugged off your lab coat, following his lead as he lifted your undershirt and bra over your head and tossing it behind him quickly before his hands reached for your breasts. The cold air swirled around your nipples and you bit down on your lip. It was shocking to finally be naked in front of the man you’d craved since the moment you met. "S-Should have made me yours a long time ago," you whispered, gazing up at him with a sudden shyness.
“Maybe I was too stupid and scared to realize before,” he practically groaned, immediately latching his mouth onto the swell of your breast, his other hand pawing gently at the other. With your nipple still pressed against his pretty pink lips, Gojo’s eyes gazed into your own. “How can I make it up to you?”
Your chuckle morphed into a moan as his tongue swirled around your chest, a devilish smirk upon his face, your reactions stimulating him further. 
“T-this is working….” you gasped, one hand steadying yourself against the desk while the other reached for his pants, beginning to tug them down. 
“I think you should be my girlfriend,” Gojo said somewhat nonchalantly as he broke away, curling his hands around your pants and shimming them down your legs. “That would make everything better-” he bent down between your spread legs and pressed his lips against your covered cunt, inhaling deeply. 
“Don’t you think?” he asked with glossy eyes and a heavy, lustful stare. “Not sure if I wanna share you.” 
“You can ask a bit more nicely…” you teased bashfully as he pulled your panties to the side. 
“Please, Y/N…. please please be my girlfriend, I promise it's worth it. I’ll give you the world, I’ll make you feel so good, better than you ever have before.” 
Though it was dim, you could see the smile on his face and sincerity in his eyes. It felt right, as it always had. 
“You promise?” Your whisper was desperate, not just for his body but also his heart. You didn’t just want him to give you the world; you wanted to share yours with him. 
His thumb ran over your protruding, bottom lip. “I promise, Y/N. I’m so in love with you, please let me show you.” 
“I love you too, Satoru.” 
And that’s when his tongue finally lapped against your slit, a groan of satisfaction vibrating against your core. How desperate he was, how sloppy, but it worked. It worked too well, and you were already coming undone from how gentle he was with your clit, the smooth circles edging you closer and closer, opening you up and preparing you for the utmost pleasure. How sexy you were, splayed across your own desk for him, just like the way you were in his dreams, when he would spend all night longing for your calming presence, fantasizing until he worked himself into an orgasm. 
You moaned and whimpered for him, because of him, and he felt his cock about to burst just from the sight of you, from tasting you.
And after your first orgasm, Gojo leaned forward and captured your lips with his, stifling your moans so only he could hear. His name upon your lips, begging for more, begging for all of him. 
Heavenly, you were, and it was all for him—something Gojo would have never predicted. Yes, he was skilled, and yes, he was the strongest, but you were the only person to ever make him feel alive. When he said he loved you, he meant it. 
And you allowed him to finally nestle his thick cock where it was desperate to go. 
“Satoru! Ahhh….” You threw your head back at the sensation, back arching within the same movement, unprepared for how thick and commanding he would be. You closed your eyes for a moment, only feeling, only touching, only relishing in him. Your mind was filled with his rapture, his passion, his love.
“S-so big,” you whimpered, gripping the edge of the desk in bewilderment, eyes squeezing shut from the intense pressure that filled and stretched you completely. "Fuck!" Was all you managed to sound between erratic moans, only wanting to feel him, latching onto his biceps for support, bodies pressing against the other in sync from the moment of consummation. Gojo sank into you until it was painful, until you were full of his twitching cock.
You were dripping, making it easy for him to thrust as slowly as he could, waiting for you to adjust, waiting for your command to take it even further.
“M-more…” you begged, not needing to repeat your demand before Gojo ravished you. Exhilarated by your moans, he gradually began to thrust harder, obsessed with how your body trembled, pleading for more, praying for all of him.
"Fuck Y/N, you're taking me so well." Gojo complimented in a strained voice. He was vocal, and you loved it, yet you couldn't find the time to reply between your cries of ecstasy, becoming increasingly crazed. You could almost sob at how vivifying it felt.
All this time, he wanted to be this close to you, and now that he was, he needed to immerse himself in your cries and whimpers, smell you, taste you, and be enveloped by you.
"Is this what you wanted from me this whole time?" he teased, and his voice was so electrifying that even though he was still thrusting while trapping you down, your back began to arch against the desk, flush against him.
Shivers jolted through your entire body as you nodded furiously. "Yes, Satoru, so bad-ah!"
The pounding came next, so deep inside you, feeling every inch of your walls, feeling every inch of your body. Gojo moaned loudly, caging you between his arms, angled perfectly and deeply. You couldn’t look anywhere but his eyes as he thrust into you over and over again. It was so passionate, and you were a mess. Your moans mixed in with his, and it was all-consuming, it was life-changing, it was love.
It was what you imagined and so much more.
"Feels so good!" you whimpered, feeling your abdomen flood with pressure again, tightening, burning.
Gojo felt you clench around him, your body shaking. Only a few minutes had passed, and he wanted to last longer, but he couldn’t. You were too pretty, you felt too good. “Fuck baby-” he moaned. “Gonna cum-” 
He pounded into you a few more times until you cried out, gushing around him so sweetly that it was hard to pull out, he didn't want to, but he did. 
With your chest rising and falling sharply, your legs shaking and twitching, Gojo released himself with a loud, strained moan. 
"Fuck! Fuck, I love you…” he exasperated, covering your abdomen with his seed.  It was euphoric, the best he’d ever had. He leaned forward over you, grasping onto the edge of your desk, his strength and the power of his orgasm caused him to snap the molding off, completely denting and splintering the corner of your desk.
“Satoru!” you gasped, propping yourself up on your elbows. 
“Shit….” He grit his teeth in embarrassment, sheepishly scratching the back of his neck before bending down and searching for the box of tissues he saw earlier. “I’ll buy you a new one I swear-” 
And then, you started laughing. “It was that good huh?” 
“The best,” he confirmed, cleaning you up the best he could so you could slide your clothes back on. His legs were still trembling, though, and shit, he needed more.
“I love you too.” You stood on your tiptoes to kiss him. 
“Good enough to make you come back home with me?” 
“I would say perfect,” you smirked as he looped his arm around your waist. "Now I just wonder how much money Shoko is going to make on Monday..."
"What ever do you mean?" he asked with a goofy, lopsided grin, as if he wasn't close friends with her and unaware of the situation.
"She bet that we would get together..."
"Aww," he chuckled, looping your purse over his shoulder. "I'll double it since she believed in me," he said before whisking you away to his apartment, where the two of you immediately started round two.
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seeliemansi · 2 days ago
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something something
Of a story you heard a thousand times from the elders about a siren who became obsessed with a local.
They said what she did was taboo. She used her blood to make the siren fall for her. But she didn't attract just one siren, there were a lot of them. It was the reason why girls and women went missing at that time. All of them walk through the ocean with open arms. The sirens embraced them as they took them deeper and deeper in the water.
Despite the story being told a long time ago, a tradition to prevent what happened was still being followed faithfully. Women were strictly prohibited in washing their stained garments and going swimming in the ocean when they bleed.
But you have been so lonely. The people on the island isolate you. They claimed you are cursed and should have died after your whore of a mother died from a disease.
Desperate, you washed your period stained garments in the ocean. You even bathed under the moonlight. A time where they said the siren's scent of smell was strong.
You just want to be loved. You just want to be held. You just want some warmth.
The next day, golden trinkets and pearl necklaces replaced your hanged undergarments on your fence. They were so beautiful. You haven't seen them before.
Although you were happy that the legend about the sirens was real, it dawned on you that you had done something you mustn't. Frightened, you hid the siren's gifts and pretended you had done nothing wrong.
Each moons, you tried to ignore the scratches at your door during your cycle. Deep claw marks scarring the woods. Songs of desperation calling out for you to open your door late at night. To let him in.
He has such a beautiful voice. He introduced himself as Johnny. He sounded pleasant, warm, and loving.
But you know what he was doing.
You must not. It will pass. Or so you console yourself. Ignoring your bleeding hands after your nails had dug too deep after you closed your fists too tightly.
Then each morning, you will wake up with another set of jewelry, wondering why they feel sticky to touch. The item smells musky. Like the ocean; salty, and heady. But there is something more that you are not quite sure as to what it was.
It goes on and on and on.
Until, there was a storm. The wind howls and your house groans as it tries to hold itself down. The wood creaks, and your body trembles from the cold. The fire long gone after the rain leaked and wet your furnace. You were so so cold. And you are so scared and alone.
Maybe that was why when you heard a knock, it didn't occur to you how the knock sounded so clear. As if the raging storm outside silenced just so you can hear that someone is outside. Someone who can share their warmth with you.
You didn't hesitate to open the door and was greeted by a towering man. Bulked, scarred, and has a mesmerizing deep set of blue eyes, looking down on you. Lovingly. Longingly.
You don't know what occurred to you but you clung to him. Your arms snaked around his neck and you feel his, wrapping on your waist. Tighter. Pulling you closer.
It feels so right.
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cherry-pop-elf · 1 day ago
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Over For Dinner
Art The Clown x Reader
AN: I got SO MUCH love for my Your Own Happy Ending so here we are with more horror x reader content!
Sum: Halloween had passed and Christmas was just around the corner. You were just doing some domestic things when you couldn’t help but notice a window was open. One you had locked
Warnings: 18+, Violence, gore, home intruder, Art being Art, MUTE Art (gotta take the disability rep when we can) gun violence, implied cannibalism, attempted sexual assault, (but we all know revenge is on its way. Shout out to my fellow victims that need their comfort killer to kill their abusers) it’s gonna get messy, very horror aesthetic story line, just. Art being art. (Needs another warning 😭) and of course domestic fluff as icing on this murder cake
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“Honey! Where did you put the Christmas lights?!” You shouted to your boyfriend, only to stumble upon them in the kitchen. Just where he had left them for you.
“NEVER MIND-!”
You would grab the box, and started to hang the slightest all through out the interior of the home. Oh the joys of LED lights. Saves you money while still enjoying the festive spirit.
It wasn’t Halloween, sure, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t be fun. To enjoy the lights, music, sounds, and pleasures. Each holiday had its own little flavor. Some might not enjoy certain flavors, others may have a favorite. Doesn’t hurt to dabble in multiple.
You were humming away at some Christmas tune, while wrapping the lights or hanging them, when you stumbled upon an open window. You would poke your head out, and looked around. Was wondering where that draft came from.
You pulled your head back in, and then closed it shut. That’s when you noticed something was off with the lock. It was locked in place, yet the window had been open. You gave the window another look over and found that the wood work looked strange. Like someone shoved a crowbar between it and forced it open. The small splintering a reaction from it.
“Honey?” You called out, trying to reason that maybe it was his doing. Some kind of prank of sorts. Yeah. Your boyfriend was quite the card after all. Would make sense that he would do something wild. Always liked to keep you on your toes.
Still…..This wasn’t his style. Not his style at all. Was way too subtle. He’s NOT the subtle type.
You hurried back into the kitchen, and pulled out one of the knives from your block. Someone was inside the house. Someone who shouldn’t be.
“Hey honey?! You still in the attic?!” You called out, as you slowly walked the hallways. Maybe if you kept making it clear you weren’t the only one in the house that the intruder would get scared and run off. Right?
That’s what you hope anyway. You had a theory that this person assumed you lived alone. Your boyfriend always made sure to leave the house at night, and it was normally very late at night no less. People wouldn’t assume you had someone live with you.
“Honey?!” You called again, wondering why he wasn’t responding. Yeah he can’t respond, but he had ways to indicate he heard you. You made the effort to learn sign language for him, and he made the effort to find alternatives to share his voice with you.
Just where was it right now?
Slowly through the hallways you went. Each step as calculated as it could be. Every creak of a floorboard was memorized by all your little hide and seek games with your partner. All the corners treated with care. Any sound you heard was listened as hard as ears could muster.
Nothing but wind, cars driving by, and your own breathing.
Like a crack of lighting the back of your head was grabbed, and your face was slammed into the wall. Such pain made your body instinctively let go of your blade, and reach for where you hurt. Curse your human reaction. Hardly so much as touched your face when you were yanked away from the bloody wallpaper.
A arm was around your throat, and another around your waist. Your fingers tried to tear at the arm on your neck, but the invader was wearing thick clothing. No way for you to get any kind of hit. All you could do was fight to breathe.
“I know you are home all alone. That Honey bullshit isn’t fooling me. Now just play nice and you won’t get hurt more than needed. Got it?” The man would speak into your ear, as you felt cold metal being pressed against your temple.
Guess you gotta play nice.
“The hell do you want, huh?” You snapped. Suppose when your lover is a few lions short of a full circus you don’t get scared of dangerous situations as easy as you should. If this was between you and your boyfriend it would simply be foreplay.
“Well for starters money. You got yourself a pretty fancy house here. Not enough for security cameras, but it’s clear you got enough. I also want to have some fun with you. No point wasting a warm body.” He chuckled at you, as he would rub the gun across your body. Made you want to gag. Or was that just the borderline suffocation?
“Fuck off. For your information I do have a boyfriend. My boyfriend is an insane bastard no less. He’s going to turn you into mush for what you are doing to me. He’s around here somewhere. Must be behind the house helping decorate. You are dead meat when he comes in here!” You threatened, just to get the barrel of the gun pointed back at your temple.
“Oh will you fucking shut up? You got no boyfriend. I’ve been watching this house for ages. Never seen him once. It’s always just been you. I sure as hell never heard him either-!” That’s when you had to cut in. “He’s mute you shit head. Of course you wouldn’t hear him-!” That just made him laugh.
“You are really sticking to that whole boyfriend thing, huh? Well if it’s true then that means you know how to please a man. Don’t you?” That made you shiver in disgust, as he gave another tight hug around your waist. Just finding any excuse to touch you.
That’s when there was the sound of the back door opening.
“Who the fuck is that?” He would grit between his teeth, as you grinned.
“My boyfriend. Duh.”
That didn’t please him one bit. The attacker was soon trying to drag you somewhere else in the house. To try and maybe buy some time to think of how to handle two people against one. You sure made sure he struggled though. Kicking your legs, and trying to make a noise. The cold metal to your temple made it clear you couldn’t speak or it’s game over. So all you can do is legs.
He was making an attempt for the stairs, to try and make distance away from the back door, but that just gave you the perfect kicking items. You nailed each photo frame you could with your feet. Sent them crashing down, and glass breaking. Was very loud against the quiet house. Not to mention since it’s on the stairs they would go toppling down.
That noise alerted your boyfriend in an instant, and now he was at the bottom of the stairs.
He looked like such a normal guy. Snow was still fresh on his black boots and pants. A cozy white sweater and gloves. A nice finish was a black beanie. Looked like your typical string bean. The only thing that seemed off at all was his very defined nose. If not that, just another guy off the street.
“Watch it! I’m the one with the gun here! Don’t try anything or the bitch gets it!” The man would yell at your boyfriend, as said boyfriend held his hands up. Acting as if he was a scared man.
“We are going to do things my way. That means no funny business, got it?!” You couldn’t stop your snort, despite the dire situation. Had him look down at you, and press the gun harder into your temple.
“The hell is so fu-!”
Bang.
The intruder wasn’t the only one with a gun.
He was just to damn fast for the attacker to comprehend. One second he had a gun at your head, the next he was tumbling down the stairs. Screaming in pain, as he had been shot right into his hand.
“I warned ya! But no~! Someone wanted to be all big and tough huh?” You mocked, as you would come down the stairs. Stepped right over him, and gave your knight in shining armor a kiss of gratitude. Arms wrapped around his neck, and his own around your waist.
“Eh. Guess we should be good hosts and have him over for dinner. I know you love fresh meat.” You giggled, as your attacker was in pain and confusion. Didn’t have time to ask what you meant, before he was tossed over the shoulder of the man who shot him. Gun playfully spinning in his hand, as you focused on cleaning up the mess.
You would hum away, as you would hang up the photos that weren’t broken, meanwhile the intruder was screaming for help. Begging for god to save him.
There was no god here.
You would take the gun off the stairs, and bring it to a trunk that was stuffed full of weapons. Many your boyfriends, but most from all the other people who tried to fuck with the clown.
You locked it up, and came to the kitchen. Going to get some bleach from under the sink.
“Aw dammit. We ran out of bleach. Art, sweetie, do we have any in the pantry?” You looked over so casually, while the man was strapped down on the marble counter top. Currently having himself become a dissected mess. Organs currently being pulled out and separated.
Art would give you a nod, before getting back to work. That work being pull the man’s heart out, and offering it to you. Had you all giggly, as you kissed his bloody cheek.
“Aren’t you sweet. I’ll clean up the stairs while you finish with dinner. Guess we don’t have to worry about a Christmas ham this year. Thanks so much for coming over! Saved us alot of stress.” You would wave at the man, as he would soon just lay there. Eyes glossy from death pulling him to wherever his soul may lay.
“My hero.” You laughed, as you kissed his cheek again. Was happily returned, before you two nuzzled your noses together. As if simply newly weds.
What a way to start the holidays.
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mental69er · 2 days ago
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Okay but the thought of Victoria Neuman falling in love with the reader who is a retired ballerina that teaches lessons but is also Zoe's ballet teacher and favorite ballerina before they retired has been bouncing around in my brain.
content: sfw, ballerina reader, fluff piece, short
You only knew her as Zoe's mother. The put together woman in designer suits that picked up her daughter in a black car with a driver that opened the doors for them.
You didn't bother to inquire about what she did for work. Her face was plastered all over the TVs as elections drew near. A lot of your clients were wealthy or famous, bringing their children to you to learn ballet.
You had been a prodigy in it, learning dance moves before you could even form a proper sentence. Your rise to fame and acclaim had been fast, skyrocketing you into the stratosphere before it all came crashing down. Ballet was not easy on the body, especially not on such a young one that was still developing.
It was why you had to retire professionally, only teaching the occasional ballet class if there were enough clients on the roster. Still, you were quite famous and it wasn't odd that many in the upper echelons knew who you were.
What was odd though, was Victoria's interest in you.
You specifically did not stay and chat with parents, knowing they were busy, or wanting to avoid the general superficiality in which these people operated. Victoria always went out of her way to talk to you after class was over, or if she could catch you alone, before class.
Her questions were kind, polite, and yet her eyes were probbing. Undressing you, trying to dive in your mind and understand you. It wasn't the first time you'd seen hunger like this on another's face, her's was merely better guarded. When you had been younger, less broken, many men had wanted you like their own personal doll.
You had never given in. But it had been years since you'd last felt prized, like you weren't an old discarded toy.
Still, you were wary. Carefully dancing around her flirations and inquisitive nature, waiting her out until Zoe's lessons would end for the semester.
With each gradual passing week, you could see Victoria becoming more and more frustrated by her lack of progress. The woman was hell bent on getting closer to you.
"You know, I used to want to be a ballerina too."
You couldn't help but arch an eyebrow in shock. "Really?"
"I was a bit too rooted in my major in college to suddenly switch to it. But I did wonder what it would be like to move with such grace, with such passion as you did." She said, chuckling warmly to herself. "You move your body so well." The last part was said in a slightly lower tone that had your stomach flipping.
"Zoe ended up watching some of your performances and wanted to try ballet too. I couldn't deny her it the same way I denied myself. And now here we are," Victoria said.
"Here we are, " you repeated.
"You should give Zoe private lessons," she said, and you knew what she was angling for. It was all a cover to have you without the distractions of others.
"I don't do private lessons."
"You should. I pay alot," Victoria said, tone turning serious. Her brown eyes were fixated on you and she stepped in closer. You couldn't find it in you to step back. "Think about it." She took out a card from her inner pocket. You took it and she stepped away, going back to her car where Zoe was waiting for her.
You sighed. This looked to be Victoria's private number on the card. You thumbed it thoughtfully and watched as her car pulled away.
Did you dare indulge in the president elect's whims?
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sveleri · 2 days ago
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For me the conversation after Blood of Arlathan where he expresses his faith in Rook kind of had the opposite effect! It felt like calculated flattery, so instead of convincing my Rook to relax it kept them fully on guard... and in the end it didn't make a difference. There was no way to see the trap coming until it was triggered, exactly as Solas planned. But in that moment I honestly think he was being as genuine as he could allow himself to be without letting his mask slip. And his mask never slipped around Rook. He was no longer the freshly-awakened god from DAI who didn't have his act all together yet, so unlike the members of the Inquisition Rook got to see the true depths of his skill as a manipulator firsthand.
I think it's illustrative of who Solas is as a person that every betrayal he committed was ultimately a betrayal of himself as well. No matter how much it hurt he kept cutting away the kindest, gentlest, softest parts of himself every time he turned on the people he cared for. He couldn't imagine a world where anyone he has wronged actually forgave him (because he couldn't forgive himself) so the only chance he saw for redemption was to change the world itself. No matter how he felt about Rook there was never a chance that they alone could convince him to change his mind specifically because he saw himself in them. There is no one Fen'Harel is more practiced at betraying than Solas.
Which makes Rook's role in the final confrontation with Solas a quiet one, but utterly crucial. Morrigan, Mythal and the Inquisitor do most of the talking, but Rook's very presence is a mirror, a reminder of everything he has done. And this reflection, who he has gravely wronged in all the ways that he has wronged himself, chooses not to lash out but instead calls upon the people who can actually convince Solas to accept redemption. He'll never be sure exactly how they did it or why, but he knows that without Rook things couldn't have played out this way and that holds a special significance to him.
In the moment I was caught off-guard and wondered why he turned around to thank my Rook, who'd just been standing there in silence while his old love and new heart finally talked him down, but considering it now after reading this post I think that what Solas was grateful for was the chance to look in a mirror and see his reflection do what he couldn't: forgive.
The highlight of Veilguard for me is the relationship between Solas and Rook- and I don't know how to write about this on the internet without being acutely aware of other peoples' criticisms (such as there not being enough of it)- so I'll just say up top that I'm not actually intending this as a refutation of any of those. I just want to talk about my experience with the game and why I like it so much, which will probably make obvious where I disagree with some reoccurring critiques I've seen. *
The thing about Solas in this game is that he plays the role of the trickster perfectly. As much as Fen'Harel is a myth or a persona, and the stories we know of him invented or twisted, his role in Veilguard feels like it could slot in so, so easily with the myths, and in many ways directly parallels them. He is sinister and noble, monstrous and sympathetic, ruthless and compassionate, all at once. He spends the game trapped and humbled but can be almost gleefully condescending at times. He conflates outsmarting an enemy with being right, even as he plays the long-suffering martyr, tortured by countless mistakes. He falls easily into the role of advisor but is quick to note your foolishness. To sneer and declare the problem yours and yet still impose upon you an appraisal of your conduct.
But more than any of that, for most of the game, he's...passive. Dormant. He seems to make no moves, other than as a glorified consultant, despite starting as the main threat.
In Blood of Arlathan, when he finally rears his head again as major a player on the board, it's with a gallant offer of help. As an ally. He is exactly what you need, right when you need it, and you don't even have to ask him to be. And- because you don't have constant access to him, you maybe haven't even considered him an option!
He feels extremely intentionally sparing to me before this in service of a) making you think you're the one with power over him and b) causing you to forget he might contribute at all, so that when he finally does, it seems wholly benevolent. It comes in a moment where your goals are exactly aligned, and indisputably noble.
It's a waiting game. A classic of his, harkening back to stories we've heard time and again about Fen'harel and traps.
As Felassan tells it in the Masked Empire:
Fen'Harel was captured by the hunting goddess, Andruil. He had angered her by hunting the halla without her blessing, and she tied him to a tree and declared that he would have to serve in her bed for a year and a day to pay her back. But as she made camp that night, the dark god Anaris found them, and Anaris swore that he would kill Fen'Harel for crimes against the Forgotten Ones. Andruil and Anaris decided that they would duel for the right to claim Fen'Harel. He called out to Anaris during the fight and told him of a flaw in Andruil's armor just above the hip, and Anaris stabbed Andruil in the side, and she fell. Then Fen'Harel told Anaris that he owed the Dread Wolf for the victory and ought to get his freedom. Anaris was so affronted by Fen'Harel's audacity that he turned and shouted insults at the prisoner, and so he did not see Andruil, injured but alive, rise behind him and attack with her great bow. Anaris fell with a golden arrow in his back, badly injured, and while both gods slumbered to heal their wounds, Fen'Harel chewed through his ropes and escaped.
He goads his enemies into fighting each other for his benefit. Anaris, who had hunted him, succeeds with Fen'Harel's advice, exploiting a weakness he could only see with his aid. In turn, Anaris himself is left exposed. The victory goes to Fen'Harel, who has now dispatched two enemies at once and cleverly won his freedom.
He who was both Creator and Forgotten One. Who could walk amongst both as kin, and who in the end turned his back on them all.
Another tale:
The god Fen'Harel was asked by a village to kill a great beast. He came to the beast at dawn, and saw its strength, and knew it would slay him if he fought it. So instead, he shot an arrow up into the sky. The villagers asked Fen'Harel how he would save them, and he said to them, 'When did I say that I would save you?' And he left, and the great beast came into the village that night and killed the warriors, and the women, and the elders. It came to the children and opened its great maw, but then the arrow that Fen'Harel had loosed fell from the sky into the great beast's mouth, and killed it. The children of the village wept for their parents and elders, but still they made an offering to Fen'Harel of thanks, for he had done what the villagers had asked. He had killed the beast, with his cunning, and a slow arrow that the beast never noticed.
Felassan is everywhere in the Crossroads, in memories, in regrets, in notes that speak to a time you can barely fathom and traces of a friendship that is never once brought up by Solas directly (to my knowledge at least). I think Felassan serves a lot of purposes; he's a window into history, into Solas' mind and ideals, someone who challenges moments of ruthlessness but is loyal, an advisor who keeps Solas grounded even as he pushes him to become something larger than he is, a lingering notion of a loss that you can never really see the full scale of, and so on. And I think, too, that he's written carefully to be a meaningful presence from the rebellion without explicitly spoiling what eventually happens to him, which I wouldn't be surprised if was a legit consideration made for people who might go back and read the Masked Empire after dav lol- in the same way that Trespasser only really spoils the book if you already know what happens.
But for me, every note signed with his name is almost a tongue-in-cheek warning about what's to come. Felassan. A slow arrow, fired apparently mockingly into the sky, only to strike true when it's least expected. A solution executed with neither kindness nor explanation, serving first and foremost the interests of the one who fired it. Felassan's presence in the game ever so slightly encodes a reminder of who you're actually dealing with and what his core tenants are, whether as an ally or an adversary. You only know if you know, but it doesn't seem an accident to me that this reoccurring name of a general who shaped himself in honor of the Dread Wolf's unorthodox cleverness is so key to these traces of Fen'Harel's past, despite, again, never directly being discussed.
Anyways, to Rook. First, I gotta give a shoutout to Bryony Corrigan, whose voice I used for mine- she honestly made the game for me, especially in moments where I felt unsure of it. I love Rook, I love how they're written, and I love how they're performed. While a complete blank slate protagonist can be really fun, I find putting myself as a player in conversation with limitations given by the game really fun and interesting, and often surprising! And I do feel there's still plenty of flexibility.
My perspective on the relationship between Rook and Solas in Veilguard is specific to how I played of course, and I haven't seen other versions of their dynamic at this point to compare so I can't speak to them. But my experience was as such:
I didn't come into the game wanting to intentionally antagonize him. If he rose at me, I rose at him- and those moments of tension were really, really fun. But I tried to accept what he gave me with a fairly open mind. Skepticism, sure, but also the knowledge that ultimately, we both wanted Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain gone, and he knew them better than I did.
It was really gratifying, then, to see our rocky partnership evolve over time into what seemed like a genuine respect. But it didn't really feel straightforward to me either. For example, the conversation before Weisshaupt held a lot of weight for me: listening to him tell that chilling tale about undermining an enemy with persistent laughter and finding that 'Do whatever it takes to remove those who oppose you' was something we came out aligned on was.... There was an element of foreboding to that. Like, I had found myself actively trying to impress him here! And feeling good when it seemed like I had, but uneasy about how I had done it, even when I agreed with what I'd said.
And of course, after that comes Arlathan. Solas' big hero moment. This is the point in the game where our alliance finally felt comfortable to me. The conversation in the fade after was the first time that it really seemed like we were on even ground. And the game- not just Solas- told me here outright that I had earned his respect! After that, I didn't consider betrayal a possibility for a moment. Honestly, I barely even considered him an antagonist at all, because he had become a partner instead! I was expecting something clever down the line, but I wasn't worried about it hurting me. Our disagreements had been set aside, and the goal of his that I had initially opposed had been so thoroughly usurped I had forgotten that he was even pursuing it. And yes, that's perhaps naivety on my part, but I was so distracted by that not at all being the main plot that I forgot that it actually still was. Which is the whole point, right? He waits until your head is turned the other way to strike.
All this to say, my reaction when you kill Ghilan'nain and Solas uses the instability of the Veil to force you into his prison went beyond shock and confusion. It wasn't until well into his villain monologue that I was able to accept that he had betrayed me at all- having been thus far trying desperately to convince myself that the sequence I was seeing was Elgar'nan playing mind games in retaliation, and not actually Solas.
That prison moment is his Slow Arrow. You are Anaris to Elgar'nan's Andruil, the dagger the chink in her armor, and Ghilan'nain's death the golden arrow striking you in the back.
The wolf chews its leg off to escape the trap.
And I should say, I was coming at this all from the meta perspective of someone who loves Solas and empathizes with him and has never seen him as irredeemable or evil- and I, the player, who believed that all game and is ultimately satisfied with the resolution I got- felt hoodwinked as fuck in this moment lmao!!
There's a line in the prison that Varric has about it being easier for Solas to play the villain when he knows he's causing harm- so I do think he plays up his sinisterness here on purpose. But it's such a slap in the face coming straight off of "You have earned the respect of the Dread Wolf." A true and profound betrayal, at least for me.
And it doesn't stop there! His trickster maneuvers and half-truths aren't done until the credits roll. I love that when you meet again, he is nothing but apologies. He makes every concession- that Varric was a good man, that every victory in this fight has been yours, that he needs you and not the other way around, that he was wrong and made mistakes and betrayed people who never deserved it. And of course, we know from experience at this point that this won't stop him from doing it again anyways. But he never holds back from placing the blame on himself. Agreeing with you. Telling you you're right, and that Elgar'nan must be stopped. He only ever says things that are true. Things that are aligned with your point of view.
"[The veil] will never come down by my hand." Well, yes. Because it will fall on its own when Elgar'nan is dead. You won't hardly have to do anything at that point, Solas, will you?
It doesn't matter if Rook isn't falling for it, because if they don't accept his partnership, they lose! That's it! It's the same as it was at the start, but with the added sting of knowing it probably won't work out in your favor this time.
I remember before launch John Epler saying that Solas sees himself in Rook, which really echoes throughout the whole game for me. There are some ways you could say Solas seems opposite to Rook- and of course this can wax and wane depending on roleplaying choices, but the central conceit of Rook as Varric's recruit is that they are a specialist in being willing to act. And on the surface at least, that's kind of counter to Solas' Slow Arrow, right? Blunt force versus delayed gratification. But not entirely! Because every backstory we have for Rook revolves around a kind of heroism that is unorthodox enough to have left you ultimately punished for it. Like yeah, yeah, you saved some lives.... The optics were kinda bad though, so maybe you could go on a sabbatical for a while?
Rook is, from the start, an unconventional and unsung hero, admonished by some for ruffling feathers that they shouldn't have in pursuit of a noble goal. Not unlike Fen'Harel.
I find, too, that there's kind of a nesting doll of parallels around Rook and Solas as foils that the whole story hinges on:
We see Solas, his regrets plastered on every wall, each of them tied to Mythal. At every turn he seems to warn her that this is not the right path, but he follows her down it anyways, until he is left with nothing but an overwhelming need to fix what they have broken.
We see Felassan, who still wears Mythal's vallaslin on his face, challenging Solas' judgement and methods, but still standing by him through the rebellion, after the Veil, for however many thousands of years they slept. Ultimately, in the Masked Empire, the thing that makes him falter is his admiration for someone else's pursuit of freedom. His admiration for Briala.
"I suspect you'll hate this, but she reminds me of-"
Solas is Rook. Solas is Briala. Upstarts, flawed defenders, people who are made into leaders because of their willingness to fight for something. Who see injustice and cannot rest.
Solas is Felassan, the devoted general. One who pushes against his orders but cannot deny them. Someone who loves the cause, but more than that is dedicated to the person who champions it. A voice of reason who, in the end, turns away.
Solas is Mythal, a pragmatic leader, responsible for uncountable deaths. Someone who has relied on partners and power structures that have led her down a dark path, partners whose mistakes in their pursuit of power have become her own. Partners who in the end betray her.
Solas is trapped in his regrets because they are not all his. He struggles with having been failed and with how he has failed others, and in his mind the two become conflated. He carries these contradictory roles on his back- perpetrator and victim, betrayer and betrayed- and cannot see how to overcome them. He is ultimately freed by Mythal's absolution because the foremost factor in his crusade is not belief but guilt.
The ends have to justify the means, because there is no other way he can live with himself. And at every step, he is trying to redeem Mythal as much as he is trying to redeem himself.
He did not want a body, but she asked him to come. He wanted to give wisdom, not orders. I will always follow where you go.
He left a scar when he burned her off his face.
It was all for her. It was always for her.
Solas' duplicity is unending, but so is his devotion. And there is such an earnestness to a Rook, always betrayed, that sees and empathizes with that and uses it to free him.
* I will say that during the game I was definitely wishing you could show your hand to him a little more and press him about his memories prior to the endgame (and separate from this I have quibbles with the impact of some of those memory reveals- like wrt the delivery just not feeling as weighty as I would like. The payoff is absolutely still there in the end, it just felt to me like they were too nonchalantly getting a ton of info out that had to be established moving forward, despite these being like earthshattering reveals that people have Correctly (!!!!) theorized about for up to 15 years). That being said, in retrospect it would have lessened the impact of the finale to have pressed Solas about, for example, his relationship to Mythal prior to absolutely pulling the rug out from under him with it at the 11th hour. And additionally, it's a structural nightmare because you can uncover the memories at almost any point in the story, and you don't have constant access to Solas to chat with him about them. Which you shouldn't imo, in service to the story being told!! But it's also true that early on I found scenes with Solas super gripping, and scenes with my team often...not. And that was initially disheartening, but developed positively over time on all fronts once the game didn't have to worry about setting things up. So, I did wish for more here at first, but I've revised my opinion now that I can see the whole arc.
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mersei47 · 2 days ago
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I've been thinking about this self indulgent hank x player story for a while now and I really wanna share it because I love player and like the thought of them and hank met each others. This is gonna be long (and possibly broken grammars) but I will do my best at explaining it. the story is below
in one loop player started their own personal investigation to find out who this hank is out of curiousity. When both of them finally met, hank found player to be interesting and curious as to why player is so good at fighting (player didn't tell hank about the loop yet because they think nobody would believe them). Hank then decided to join player's team as a temporary hireling but he told them he didn't want any payment, he only joined them because he bored and wanted some entertainment.
as time go on hank and player started to get close. Hank realized that player is unlike the others and was fun to be around with. When it was time for player to enmesh the mandatus hank just went "you going to kill god? like an actual god? that's my shit count me in too". Player tried to tell hank that he can't go there because they have no idea what will happen to him if he did and this scenario had never happen before but hank was stubborn as fuck so player just let him.
when player and hank met gambler, gambler was confused at hank's presense and said how this event was not supposed to happen (hank found gambler annoying and commented on how he liked to use ambigious and fancy words to make himself looks mystery). Gambler tried to prevent hank from going any further but player told him that it was fine just let him do whatever he wanted because honestly they secretly wondering too what will happen.
After both of them finished taking down the machine, they got warped back to nevada and standing at the edge of the nowhere. player told hank that this is gonna be the last time hank see them but they are happy that in this loop they didn't face the machine alone and glad to see other side of hank that's not only violent part. Hank didn't think too hard about what player said but he really let himself get attached to them and suddenly feel....disappointed? regret? he didn't say it out loud and didn't know what to say so he just watched player walked into the nowhere until he couldn't see them anymore.
After player went vanished everyone at annex building went into chaos for a few days but soon managed back to normal by 2bdamned. Hank already knew that doc must knew about the whole mandatus thing with player so he went up to doc and asked him if player will ever coming back and doc said no. Hank didn't bother asking more from doc because he knew that doc already made up his mind about this but he couldn't help being frustrated himself. He also regret not really say anything to player back then. (he realized his feeling too late)
but after all those events, the machine will view hank as a bug/defective to the system because player is supposed to be the only one witness it but now hank witness it too.
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this graph I draw is how I view arena mode event combined with my story. player stuck between points in time. And hank you can view him as like a virus or something like that because since he meant to be contained just like player but he's not and now continue to exist until present time. making him a dangerous being to the system (nevada)
think of it like, hank knows too much behind the curtains and he could use that to his advantage to destroy the machine anytime he wants
that's all I have for now. you can tell I really struggle with the last part of how should I explain it but im glad I get it all out. I hope you guys get the overall context of my rambling
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steve-needs-a-hug · 1 month ago
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2x08, 'Shadow and Flame'
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actualclownfucker · 2 days ago
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i really like the idea of bcsr being suuuuuper pro-muggle. so like, barty would be raised with a muggle and wizarding education (he is a math nerd and you cannot, will not convince me otherwise LOL) and bcsr always had muggle technology, muggle and wizarding books and literature around the house
so bcj read call of cthulhu and said “i am gonna get me some of THAT” he goes to hogwarts and sees the giant squid and he fckin cums
(sometimes i wonder why regulus tolerates him, it’s def for the dick tho)
and yes, i believe voldemort was hot during the first war, at first. it wasn’t until he had all his horcruxes that he started to look “waxy”
but i mean, i am basing it off the opinion of harry and by god. he sees any dark haired man at all and he just goes “smash.” big reason why he didn’t like bcj (apart from his wormface), he’s a blond!
ohhhh, i have a lot of thoughts about bcj humanizing voldemort, actually. i know it would be easy to jump to the conclusion that voldemort didn’t like it, but i actually think he did
(i’d even say he let bcj call him “tom” when they were alone, if bcj could say anything other than daddy”)
i feel like, in a way, voldemort is a lot more human than some people give him credit for
yes, he’s cold and heartless and tried to get rid of his past. but at the same time, he’s sort of… not that cold
he likes jokes, he gets angry, he laughs, he resents his family and has his own surplus amount of daddy issues and all of this makes it easy for me to see the human in him
and i think bcj looking at him, talking to him, like yes he’s he’s the greatest dark wizard of all time and bcj worships him, but he can still just talk to him like a person, would be something voldemort actually loves. he doesn’t need bcj to be scared of him, there’s no point in that
the way to get bcj under his thumb is, oddly enough, with kindness and appreciation of his intellect, which voldemort would be happy to do. he would be thrilled to have intelligent conversation with bcj
it’s that exact right amount of worship and still being able to talk to him that voldemort would make bcj tolerable
barty has always wanted to be someone’s favorite. being voldemort’s bitch, the only one with that title, being preferred over everyone (except maybe snape, wtf voldy, that was stupid) it’s his way of being special
him finding out about what voldemort’s told harry in the graveyard scene could go one of two ways IMO, he was either devastated that someone else mattered to voldemort as much as him, had convinced himself to be delusional enough to believe he’s the only one that mattered
OR because he’s gotten to know voldemort so well, it doesn’t come as a surprise to him at all about harry. he knows how valuable and connected he and voldemort are, it’s okay. because voldemort still needs him too. he wouldn’t kill him like he’s going to kill harry anyways~!
LOL! voldemort would’ve gotten such a kick out of humiliating bcj and i think bcj hates being embarrassed. which is unfortunate being as his entire personality is nothing but embarrassing. when he’s embarrassed, he cries (as usual) and then he’s even more embarrassed for crying about it
(people don’t like when i say this, but if they’re going to characterize the marauders as these “pranksters,” he would’ve made an easy target for them and they’d have laughed at him and all the others in that friend group (pandora, evan, just not regulus because yk, they ignore his presence entirely). i’m not anti-marauders btw obviously, i love them and don’t think they’re much of “pranksters” as much as they are just kids who like to joke around, them planning out these elaborate pranks and stuff, i don’t think that has any basis in canon? correct me if i’m wrong tho)
anyways! yes, bcsr is oddly happy to talk down to barty as well. i can especially see him doing this to sirius when bcj is around or mentioned (i think most of the time, he goes out of his way to pretend barty doesn’t exist). however, i believe bcsr also brags about barty’s intelligence. the reason we know bcj got twelve owls is because when bcsr was outside hogwarts grounds, trying to get to dumbledore, he seems to be convinced that he’s talking to someone in the past saying, “oh, yes, barty got twelve owls and we’re very proud” gives me the impression of a man who doesn’t want people to know what goes on behind closed doors
“my shirt got wet” aww, my baby. someone hit him, quick! not only is it raining but you were already sobbing before that, the shirt was already wet with your fucking tears, idiot!
every few minutes or so, someone has to look at him and be like, “oh my GOD. what is it NOW?!”
post azzie, i think he’s more cold tho. it kinda chills out once he gets daddymort’s attention, but sirius tells us bcj spent his first few days in azkaban screaming for his mother (this is why i think him making a scene in the courtroom wasn’t an act, because what’s the point of keeping up the act for the dementors and other prisoners?) and then he went completely silent. and i don’t think he was ever the same after that
honestly, in a way, sirius has good reason for not wanting to open up to anyone - even james. deep down, he knows what bcsr does to him is wrong, but on the surface level, he won’t admit it. and he knows james is going to say all the things that he knows deep down to tell him that bcsr is wrong and the idea of him actually starting to admit to himself is terrifying so he lashes out. it’s all he knows.
it hurts james, james takes it to his parents and i wonder if sirius would almost even see that as a breach of their trust? like, “well that’s the last time i tell you anything, james” if he’s just going to tell other people. even if those people are his parents. sirius being uncomfortable with the potters and feeling like a burden there is such an important thing to me. he doesn’t want to make his problems, their problems, he wants to stay out of their way and not cause them any issues or make them regret taking him in
ouch, you’re so right. attacking bcsr = attacking sirius, calling him stupid and it’s trying to make decisions for him. he’s perfectly capable of deciding things for himself, he’s perfectly capable of being on control of himself and he doesn’t NOT need james to control him and tell him what to do.
needing people is terrifying for him, but i think the least terrifying one for him to need is bcsr. because, in sirius’s head, bcsr will tell him when he’s wrong and he’ll correct his behaviors. james, the potters, they’re too nice about it, that’s not what he needs. he feels so much more validated by bcsr and i definitely do think he could misread the potter’s concern as pity
but then, bcsr insulting james back to him, sirius feels like he’s in the crossfire of people who are supposed to care about him, but suddenly, it seems like no one does and he feels more alone than ever
but sirius feeling guilty is exactly what bcsr wanted. i like the idea of it ending abruptly too, like bcsr sends sirius a letter saying he’s disappointed in him and expected sirius to do better, maybe even tells sirius how much he’s missed him lately, sirius writes back and bcsr just doesn’t respond. sirius should’ve made more of an effort with him
i think bcsr definitely took sirius to some educational things. museums, exhibits and (idk about timeline or if there was anything like this: but i think parents taking their smart kids to watch a rocket launch is fun) things like this, to both teach sirius about art and history, but also to hear what sirius thinks of it, because even as a child he was very, very bright. not unlike his own son, who would’ve been desperate to learn from his father and desperately begged to ask his dad if he’d take him to an exhibit nearby one day, bcsr said “no, i’m busy, stay at home with your mother”
wouldn’t even allow mrs crouch to take bcj, because he didn’t earn it. so mrs crouch stays at home with bcj to look at books on whatever it was about. bcsr shows up early from work, bcj thinks maybe he changed his mind and is going to take him after all?! haha, you thought, kid.
sirius honestly probably looks at bcj and just thinks, well, he can go another time. who cares anyways?? i love a chill sirius
mrs crouch and her husband scream at each other that night (which also makes bcj cry, what doesn’t tho?)
i think bcj is similar at school to sirius how he is at home, just more calm. he doesn’t follow him around, and bcj is a few years under him, but whenever they’re in the great hall or the library together, sirius can feel barty’s eyes on him. can feel himself being stared at and he knows exactly who it is.
bcj might take to trying to trip sirius in halls and other things like this, but sirius just evades it and looks at him like “ok dude. you tried again. you done yet?”
the crouches making the blacks seem normal is WILD. but yeah, like, walburga would never grab sirius by the hair and repeatedly smash his face into the table. honestly, bcj probably only shuts up because he passes out or gets a concussion LOL
i think walburga isn’t against physical punishment at all, but maybe she wouldn’t do it the “muggle” way, you feel me? i could see her not wanting to scar him too, because she wouldn’t want a tainted heir (bruising however? she’s just fine with that). i think it happens mostly too because she and sirius get into fights and she gets so frustrated with him that she casts a spell without even thinking about it. and well, it works. she wins and he shuts up (you can’t tell me mrs black likes to lose) and there’s no guilt in her at all about it. she doesn’t apologize, which is why bcsr saying “i’m sorry for hitting you sirius” is so okay to him. plus, what’s being hit versus being crucio’d?
bcj said mama/mommy and daddy until he took the dark mark. so at least until he was 16, maybe even a little after that. but then he got pompous and switched to “mother” and “father” maybe still mama sometimes when he was alone with her tho (let me have this)
love!! sirius getting triggered by bcsr telling mrs crouch not heal bcj because walburga does the same thing? how bad are we talking? like he has a panic attack bad? because mmmm bcsr seeing sirius having a panic attack is a delicious thought
and another thought i’ve always liked, i don’t know what this does to bcj’s pureblood status, but squib mrs crouch is such an interesting concept to me. she can still give bcj potions to heal him, but can’t perform any healing spells. can’t pull her son out of spells bcsr puts him under, cant help him and even more so can’t stop bcsr
oh, no. bcsr hates bcj trying to emulate sirius. which doesn’t make sense, because doesn’t bcsr always say “be more like sirius” to him??? he’s trying! he wants to be him, be in his skin, have his dick in sirius’s ass too! what he really hates is the way bcj is going about it. wearing his clothes, taking on his hobbies, maybe even his speech pattern, rather than being quiet and obedient (and pretty) like sirius is
ooooooo!!! i really like him doing that and pretending he is sirius to cry out for daddy instead. because his obsession with sirius does stem from jealousy, i think that makes perfect sense
and tbh, sirius probably does smell good, so who can even blame bcj?
do you think sirius would stop coming over if bcj drugged and raped him?? i don’t think he’d tell bcsr that it happened, because he doesn’t necessarily want to get bcj in trouble, even after he did something so horrible
but bcj would love sirius having a love potion omg! having sirius fawn over him like that would be everything to him
and this would be easily noticeable to bcsr, obviously, because sirius isn’t being himself and the obvious person to blame is bcj. he demands winky to tell him if she knows anything, she does and admits to doing it, winky gets beat, winky doesn’t follow bcj’s orders anymore. sirius just further slips in as his son to replace bcj
harry and sirius are really similar for that, actually, yeah!!
i think it’s so hard for sirius to come to terms with bcsr being awful, so not only does he justify the abuse being done to him, but he tries to justify the way bcsr treats bcj too. i would say mrs crouch as well, but i believe whenever bcj isn’t the topic of conversation and nothing is going on with him, they’re alright. bcsr still does romantic things for her, still tells her he loves her at night, even feels bad when they fight (tho does not change his behavior or feel bad for bcj, just feels bad later that he made his wife upset) and wants to take her on romantic evenings. which she accepts because fuck. at least it’s giving bcj a night away from him and then they end up having a wonderful time because bcj doesn’t come up
do you think lily would tell sirius he’s not “broken” or would she be more the type to say, “we’re both broken” in more of a solidarity type of thing??? because she believes she is too??
“he went to stay with a friend” meanwhile sirius knows bcj’s only actual friend is regulus and he’s pretty sure bcj isn’t at their house.
but yeah, we know bcsr isn’t above using the imperius curse on his son and i think it makes sense to lean into him doing things like that a little more. anytime mrs crouch is away, bcj is nothing more than a shell of a person.
when sirius is over, he’s locked in his bedroom with protections to make sure he can’t get out or make a sound, under the imperius, or just stunned. i think stunning is the best option, because i’m amazed bcsr could keep bcj under the imperius curse as long as he did in GoF and still do his job, you know? like, i have to think that made it a bit easier for bcj to break out of it (not that seeing his master wouldn’t have done it regardless, bc the hard-on in his pants seeing daddymort again would break any spell) and bcsr would want to be focused on sirius the entire time when he’s over, so stunning seems like the perfect option.
what this does to bcj tho is mean that his mind is still running, he still sees everything, all of his screaming and crying is kept entirely in his head, all the energy in his body is overwhelming and he probably feels like he’s choking the entire time, but not even winky notices that when he visits him. because he’s just sitting there in a chair, stunned
sirius would be so genuinely confused why bcj would do that, when sirius literally just got him off the hook and now, bcj about to get punished anyways (bcsr tells sirius to leave the room as he takes off his belt, bcj knows daddy isn’t about to fuck him, but he’s hopeful. no, instead he gets whacked with the belt. and those bitches hurt)
(why go for the best friend’s brother trope when regulus can just have his brother instead, right???) i love blackcest best when regulus is the seductor. when he maybe even manipulates sirius into it a bit. i feel like it’s too easy to have sirius be the creepy “older” brother that wants to fuck his sibling. plus, i think regulus would. he’s got no concept or ideas of boundaries and he doesn’t care to
my favorite thing in blackcest (whoops outing myself here) is regulus not knowing how to get off and asking sirius for help. and sirius is like “??? bro what…. uh, okay, here’s what you do” and gives him instructions not expecting regulus to just start doing it right in sirius’s bedroom, right in front of him???? regulus complains that it’s not working and asks sirius to show him and even tho sirius knows better… he does
ooo, that’s a good point!! sirius is perfectly content to just say “barty” when he and bcj are sleeping together and bcj is fucking him. and bcj likes it too, bc he can convince himself that sirius is saying it for him
(and again, by the end of it, bcj is chanting “i love you, i love you, i love you” which is what makes sirius cum bc the idea of bcsr fucking him and saying ily?? beautiful!!)
and honestly when bcj does want to get railed, he probably just goes to some shady place with a sign that says “i’m underage, please rape me”
i really just can’t help thinking about how much bcsr being attracted to sirius and sirius literally just looking for parental figure would fuck him up for life. he could so easily start believing that sex and his looks are all anyone wants from him? he knows that the potters don’t seem like some kind of freak family that would do that to him, there’s no way james would talk about them the way he does if so, right? but fleamont asks to talk to sirius alone in his office one day and sirius just Knows™️ that, that’s it. that they’re all the same and he’s never going to have anyone to love him if he doesn’t put out
and it would make sirius feel so sick everytime he lets bcsr touch him, everytime he hears bcsr whispering in his ear how good he’s being and he catches barty’s eyes from the crack in the door, where he’s just watching silently. bcj definitely wants to go inside, scream at them and demand his father fuck him instead, but he’s too entranced by actually seeing his dad that way to do it. (and he’s gotta have fodder to touch himself to later, right?)
ohhh, what does bcj think of to conjure a patronus?? he just has so many happy memories, there’s so much to choose from! after the dark mark, it’s definitely that, but before that, boy!! he’ll just think of something happy and different each time (of course, every single memory includes himself in pain)
i do think regulus would despise being called any name in bed other than his own, because he wants to be important and powerful in some regard, wants to be remembered as himself, he would not tolerate that. but bcj would be like “ok do u wanna call me sirius then?” and that might be okay with regulus
bcsr watching sirius grow into himself and deciding their relationship has to go from parental to sexual is so, so sad for sirius, he trusted bcsr so much.
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yep!! and this reminds me… sirius’s replacement is obviously percy, who is PERFECT. for bcsr
i think sirius would love learning history and languages from mr crouch too, bc i mean!! that’s so many!! very much gives me pushes-his-son-to-achieve academic excellence as well, overachieving and not settling for anything below perfection
omg yes!!! bcsr giving sirius muggle things is so perfect. he doesn’t know anything much about motorcycles, but he went out of his way to find that for sirius, knowing sirius would be interested???? fuuuuuuckkkk.
also,,, MRS CROUCH, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN YOUR HOME?! THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE!!! i don’t even think she knows half of it!!!
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do you mean barty crouch sr by bcsr??? because omg plz tell me what you think about sirius’s relationship w him, i find the crouches so interesting, i would love to hear about that
YESS i LOVE you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i dont actually know how much of what i imagine for them can be fit into canon/is canon but like sglkfd.
so barty jr and sirius probably met during their childhood i think, bcjr was intelligent and well mannered and a respectable kid in sirius' age range, and ofc there's the hc that he was close friends w regulus, too. i hc he was pretty distant w bcjr himself but i just knoww sirius 'daddy issues' black needed everyone's parents' approval. orion was a negligent asshole sawr i think its a pretty valid course of action yk
and ofc bcsr loved him !! he was intelligent, he was quick, he was charming, well mannered, all the shit he wishes his bastard of a son was. and barty sr is a bit manipulative too yk he would definitely try to steal sirius away from his family and friends because he knows what sirius needs.
and like !! bcsr. he knows his son is death eater, he does use sirius as a replacement. he doesnt hide it, either, which he thinks justifies using a very obviously traumatized young boy to forget about the guilt in his heart about abusing, traumatizing and neglecting his own son. that being said, he gives sirius the watered down version of abuse his parents do - which sirius has grown comfortable enough with. that being said, the main reason sirius ran away isnt there: he's not a supporter of voldemort. he's actively fighting against him. (also hehe i hc walburga as bipolar so sirius is just happy he doesnt have a timebomb in the house 24/7) (or at least the timebomb doesnt explode around him !!). bcsr still mentions who sirius should associate himself with, still is disappointed when he doesnt get a good grade (an E instead of an O), he yells at sirius, maybe he raises a hand at him too - but at the end of the day sirius finds him justified because he's the one who took sirius under his wing, and is helping him, and is nice to him, and this is really what parents do to their children, right?
here is also when the post comes in btw: bcsr feels entitled to sirius' life, his idea of a parent/child relationship is ownership, and unfortunately that's sirius' view of it too, but bcsr is a lot calmer and quieter than walburga, he cares more than orion - to sirius its really the best of both worlds. bcsr wants sirius to go in politics which sirius does not want because he already has whatever career he's chosen for himself, and bcsr feels it necessary that sirius follow his - his own son wont.
bcsr does need sirius, he confides in him, he loves him (in his own fucked up way). sirius moves on, he runs away and gets farther and farther away from everything that reminds him of Before and feels resentment that bcsr (a man who he's considered his strongest father figure for years) doesn't even reach out to him once. bcsr feels that its a child's responsibility to reach out every time - he feels betrayed that sirius didn't runaway to him, that he didnt even know sirius had runaway till someone told him in passing. the letters they exchanged come to an abrupt end and it just feels like everything ended in the middle of it yk. barty crouch sr doesnt see sirius till sirius is arrested, soon after his own bio son is x
(also, yes sirius does still have the potters, but the potters are a completely different world to him. he's not used to that kind of completely unconditional love, he's not used to seeing how they shower their heir son in love. its a little bittersweet, it feels like a fantasy, sirius feels like he's intruding, he fills resentment to james for being raised with parents who love him and ofc he doesnt want that so he finds solace elsewhere. he thinks the potters are angels on earth, his relationship with bcsr is what the normal parent/child relationship. if walburga and orion are a 10 on the scale of what sirius considers to be 'bad parents', euphemia and fleamont are in the negative. bcsr falls somewhere in the middle, like a 2 or 3 to sirius. to bcjr, sirius can recognize, that bcsr is horrible. he yells, may hit, he's permanently disappointed when they do interact. they barely ever do - bcsr is always busy, he makes special time for sirius (which makes sirius giddy bc wowzers am i that important?) which cuts out even more time from bcsr and bcjr to interact. also, bcsr calls sirius son and he doesnt call bcjr son. sirius is lowk a homewrecker i love him.).
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cuteniaarts · 1 month ago
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The weight of the world is a heavy burden
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Especially for a child
(Or, in slightly less dramatic terms – I imagine that the first of her past lives that Avatar Suiren [who is the Avatar after Aang instead of Korra in my AU, and also Ghazan and Ming-Hua’s daughter] gets to talk to is Yangchen, because she is too plagued by memories not her own [including Jetsun’s death, fun fact]. And Yangchen wouldn’t want another child to go through what she did on their own)
(Or maybe someone just needed an excuse to draw @katkastrofa’s latest obsession in a context that interests them as well, just in time to maybe cheer her up a little? You can’t prove anything)
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#Avatar Suiren AU#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#yangchen#original character#sotrl suiren#if you’re wondering what the context is. Suiren is around 8 or 9 here. already having revealed herself as the Avatar to her parents#and it has been Hard. because as much as they try to maintain a sense of normalcy for her. it’s clear that things have changed#they never accounted for their daughter turning out to be the Avatar. they hoped Aang dying on the night she was born to be a coincidence#all of their plans now have to be rethought and put on hold because her safety is more important than anything else#she is never blamed for anything. she is still just as loved. yet there’s now a heaviness in their gazes whenever they look at her#the Avatar as a concept should not exist. it is too much power and responsibility for one being who is ultimately human#that’s what Suiren was taught. so what do those teachings mean if she’s the Avatar?#basically.. a whole lot of cognitive dissonance and she hasn’t even been alive for a decade yet#and all her life her head was filled by strange memories and dreams. fragments of lives not her own. sometimes nightmares#and usually her mama would comfort her through it but tonight… she just wants to be alone#so she wanders off. not too far. but enough that she wouldn’t be heard. and just softly cries#because it’s too much. because she doesn’t want to be the Avatar. why her? why not anyone else?#and as she whispers that she wishes she wasn’t the Avatar. her mind is assaulted by memories of previous Avatars saying the same thing#it really is a never ending cycle of too much burden being placed on a single person. but that realisation is anything but comforting#she begs for it to stop because that grief of life over life spent pushing a boulder uphill is just Too Much#and before she knows it. it ceases. only to be replaced by a blue glow visible even through closed eyelids#and a feather light touch of hands on her face. it doesn’t feel exactly like human hands by virtue of belonging to a spirit#that helps her relax a little. reminding her of mama’s touch. she looks at the person who appeared before her. her mind supplies the name#‘Avatar Yangchen?’. she whispers. but the woman is nowhere near as stoic and peaceful as she’s shown to be in every depiction of her#she looks.. sad. concerned. as burdened by grief as Suiren herself is. she’s not just a legendary figure from a time long gone#not yet another past life Suiren would never measure up to. she’s… human. capable of human emotion. just like Suiren is#I’m not sure how their conversation goes and have no inspiration to come up with anything. but I just wanted to draw them interacting
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purpurussy · 4 months ago
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.
#tw suicide#idk i feel like i am probably gonna kms after TIT#i would do it sooner but i asked one of my friends to come with me and it would suck if i made him go alone#and it is something to look forward to which is helping me hang on i guess#but ughhhh once uni starts again in september i know everything is gonna fall apart.#i already got an extension on my thesis due to being a useless shell of a person who can't motivate themselves to do anything atm#but i was supposed to get some work done over the summer and have so far done nothing#hence why i want to kms before i have to talk to my fucking supervisors again and admit yet again that i simply cannot do this 😭#and it's not just this. my executive dysfunction has been so bad over the past couple of years and it's only getting worse#to the point where i can't imagine being able to work at all. and if i can't work i can't get out of my parents house#and then what the fuck is the point.#every time i see someone on here talking about bonding with their parents over dnp I'm like damn what's it like#to have parents who actually want to talk to you DSFGJJKL i know they let me live in their house at my big age#but that's only bc id literally be homeless otherwise and they're not like evil. they just don't love me#also went through a deeply embarrassing breakup recently#tl;dr ive been in love with this person for over a decade and i thought they were the dan to my phil or vice versa.#then after 10 years they left me and i'll spare the details but it has me wondering if they ever loved me#i thought it was a “let's live together and get a cat one day” relationship#but now i feel like for them. it was just a “sex and video games” type situation#i am trying soooo hard to at least be creative bc that makes me happy sometimes but it's hard to not be overly critical of myself#and now im getting to a point where i can barely even find any joy in this space any more. for a bunch of reasons#most of which revolve around me being extremely sensitive. and this is like my last bastion of dopamine so that fucking sucks#idk i don't see the point in my life any more. a social worker actually told me recently that i should consider euthanasia so.#it's just completely over for me i fear#this is not even mentioning all the damn migraines. and all the other ways in which my body simply doesn't work properly#sorry for this weird ass vent I'm not in therapy any more bc i couldn't find a therapist willing to treat me+all my diagnoses at this point#and im scared my friends will stop wanting to talk to me if i talk to them about this. several of them already have#the 2 friends i have left anyway. that's a whole other thing. when they said it's hard for autistic ppl to make friends i took that persona#so uh at this point it's vent here or develop a substance abuse problem. and im already halfway to having a substance abuse problem#anyway dan and phil for the love of god please fucking post something tonight. unfortunately you are my only hope
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court-jobi · 1 day ago
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This is Izuku Midoriya coded, and I can explain
So terrible about his own sleep hygiene
If you think teaching had him stretched thin, hero work has his hours flipped like a pancake.
Like, so so bad. He'd crash onto the couch if it means he's horizontal and has at least a fraction of neck support. Whatever's closest suits him fine. Doesn't even get under the covers 7/10.
But once he's got someone special in his life? Boy is ALWAYS making the bed. Will never not have a crisp set of covers to crawl into: for no ones sake than your own.
On the most indulgent of weekends, he'd break out the steamer to top it all off, if he's feelin extra domestic after changing the sheets
But even if not, Izuku will -at the very least- making sure the pillows are oriented just how you like them, your heating pad is within reach, the right throw is assigned to your side, your bedside table is clear and your headphones are charging during the day for when you come home.
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"Zuku--"
"HM WHERE SENSEI-- H... huh? Oh hi honey, welc'm home.."
You gawk at your shocked-awake partner who's calf has fully slipped off the couch. Bleary, but happy-- he's looking to you grateful as ever through sunken eyes. Eyes that light up when you enter a room and mist up when they see you down, open to you now with enduring softness that makes you second guess your tone.
You laugh, but have to cock a hip at him. Freshly changed into PJs -having assumed he wasn't home until you happened on him in passing to the laundry room- leaves you standing here wondering why he's not dressed the same: he's been home for well over half the day by now!
"Baby," you try through a chuckle, "if you're tired, why didn't you just go to bed?"
"Didn't wanna mess it up," Izuku straightens up, "d'you see it?"
Your heart could grow twice over, how soft he looks.
You have, of course, when you went in to shower up and change: he'd prepped your bedroom perfectly for your arrival home-- a work of art, to him. Not a speck of stray laundry, no towels out of place, changed air filters, perfectly neat bed~ the works.
"I did~" you greet him properly with a kneel by his side, "thank you, sweet boy~"
"N' I wasn't gonna, if y'weren't home yet.."
"I told ya my board meeting wouldn't be too late."
"...still..."
How he's physically sagging into your hand's cup of his cheek kills you. The next three days off rotation will be a welcome recovery time for Deku. Sure, he'll still push for a full workout to keep him limber in between, but you know the first order of business is to correct that sleep deficit of his.
"Then let's break that bad boy in together, huh?" You open your palms to him.
Snorting a bemused laugh himself, Izuku wrinkles his nose, "Don't think I've got it in me to 'break it in' tonight, love.. Ask me in'the mornin."
Before you can ask, the insinuation he means has you cackling.
"No, you certainly do not, hot stuff! Only snuggles for you~"
"Yayyyyyy~"
And does it ever look like a hotel-grade sight indeed. Getting into bed when it's pulled up so crisp and perfect like this is a treat you've come to associate with Izuku's loving form of care-- and it's one you much prefer to share with him rather than indulge alone.
For my My Hero Academia Masterlist, check it out here!
Love is fixing your sheets for you every night so that you can be comfy when you come to bed
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gayeddie-saved-me · 11 months ago
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learning about buck’s childhood just makes the grocery store moment so much worse. he talks to the 118 about his problems because he thought he could trust them with it. because the only other person he could ever talk to about anything was maddie, and even she was always just a little bit out of reach. he tells them so much bad stuff because they’re supposed to be the safe place he can go where nothing hurts. somewhere he isn’t alone. his family, to remind him that he is loved and everything is gonna be okay.
what eddie said told buck that it never was a safe space. that every time he spoke to them, when he thought he finally found someone who cared enough to hear him, there was a part of them that saw him as a nuisance. an exhausting nuisance who complains about everything. who’s problems are so minuscule, they don’t matter at all. he was an inconvenience. something they had to carry but didn’t want to.
just like his parents.
#please don’t yell at me for this i do love eddie and the 118#as someone who relates a LOT to buck this is how i perceive the situation#when you grow up invisible and you finally trust someone with all of you it leads to a lot of opening up#about all sorts of things even just stubbing your toe cuz for once in your life you have someone! who might care!#even though it’s just your toe#because in the past it was never just your toe#it was every single thing that hurt#every bad moment you kept inside because you were alone in the world#there was no one there to hug you when you were sad#buck’s parents may have started out caring when he got physically hurt#but they were always emotionally neglectful#and when they did care they cared for the wrong reasons in the wrong way#and even that faded with time#their love wasn’t just conditional it was. it was so rare#how many times did he sit alone and ache and ache and ache#and all he wanted was someone to hold him. tell him he’s gonna be okay#how many times did he cry himself to sleep#how many times did he sit and wonder what he did wrong. why they saw through him. why he wasn’t enough#what could he do to be enough? what would make them look at him and see him#and be happy with what they saw#happy enough to smile at him#god what he would’ve done to have someone smile at him#and then he thought he found it. he thought he could be enough for someone. they loved him#they listened to him#and then eddie says that it’s whining. that it’s annoying and exhausting and awful#that buck should suck it up and deal with it on his own#and. and the pain he must have felt#911#evan buckley
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bataddictedloony · 1 year ago
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Define a woman!
I’m gonna rant this here cus this argument keeps returning on the clock app and one day, I’m gonna be stupid and leave a comment in the wrong thread or smthn so I’m just gonna get it out of my system:
“How do you define a ‘woman’?”
Answer for idiots: you can’t.
You cannot possibly make a definition for the term ‘woman’ without excluding someone from the group when they clearly ARE part of the group (even if you’re a piece of shit transphobe and don’t want to include trans women). A woman is someone who has the potential to give birth? You just excluded every child before puberty, every infertile woman and every woman on menopause, next. A woman is someone who has a uterus? You just excluded a bunch of intersex women and all women who had a hysterectomy, next. A woman has a period? Excluded the millions of women who never get their period for various reasons AND all the women who take continuous birth control AND women who are pregnant AND again, little girls and women on menopause. A woman has to have XY chromosomes? Are you gonna check that for every feminine-looking person you’re gonna meet? How? Do you not think women with down syndrome are women?
Decades of feminism working so hard to make sure women are more than their genitals and potential to give birth, all flushed down the drain because you refuse to believe trans women are more than men in wigs? You’re weak as shit.
So answer for people who actually want to use their brain:
Woman is defined through experiences. Which experiences? Entirely up to whoever defines themselves as a woman.
The ‘female experience’ is so broad. You cannot possibly define it in one sentence and stick it on everyone who calls the word ‘woman’ their own.
You feel feminine and empowered by doing your nails? Congrats, that’s the female experience and makes you, therefore, a woman.
You feel feminine and empowered by wearing plaid and splitting wood in two with a giant axe? Congrats! Female Experience. Woman.
You feel feminine in a dress? Woman. You feel feminine in a tux and suit? Woman.
You feel empowered as a mother and love being pregnant? Woman! You despise the idea of being pregnant but find empowerment in your career? Woman! You feel like your period makes you more in tune with your femininity? Woman. You feel like your period makes you less than human and getting a hysterectomy makes you feel more comfortable in your body? Woman.
you love long hair? Woman. You love short hair? Woman.
You love loving men? Woman. You love loving women? Woman. You love both? Woman. You love everyone? Woman. You don’t feel like love is your thing? Woman!
Sitting at home with a good movie and a bottle of wine? That’s a woman. Getting bloody in a game of soccer? That’s very woman! Taking a walk with your dog? How very woman! Going to the gym? Such woman! Eating out with friends? Friend woman. Shooting a gun in the yard from the patio you built yourself? All woman!
Whatever the fuck makes you feel in sync with your femininity is your female experience, and if you have female experience and you like it, you are a W O M A N ✨
Same goes for men and the male experience btw! Since the question “what defines a man” is never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever EVER asked for SOME 👀 reason. (We all know the reason….) Also same goes for my fellow enbies and the non-binary experience. If painting your nails bring you closer to your enbie side, you’re non-binary.
Gender is such a deeply personal experience, it’s just dumb to define it for someone else, let alone the entire human species. It’s like asking to define a chair, like, you KNOW what it is but you can’t possibly define it without excluding some chairs (“has at least 4 legs”, that’s a horse also swivel chairs exist).
Sidenote: If some idiot tiktokker shoves a microphone and a camera in your face and goes “WHAT IS A WOMAN” or “HOW MANY GENDERS ARE THERE” just go along with whatever dumbass scenarios they come up with. “How many genders are there?” “My dude, as many as you want!” “Oh so like 40??” “Yep!” “Can I identify as a helicopter lol?” “Sure, who cares, do it!” “Should I demand everyone at my job calls me a helicopter” “You can go to your local townhouse, request to change your name to ‘helicopter’ and they’ll most likely let you. You’re an adult, you can do whatever you want as long as it’s not hurting others.” “You don’t think it would be dumb of me to do that?” “Why would I care, I don’t know you?”
#Imma get off the clock app for a while again#My fyp is on the wrong side of the argument again#Saw a lot of comments basically boiling down to “you’re delusional and you need to grow up”#Y’all the ones breaking down an entire socio-biological science to just “can u make baby or nah”#And it’s always under videos of enbies with really Out There fashion senses who have Such Trouble talking on the spot#Or who clearly have trouble explaining themselves#And the transphobe eat that shit up like sugar#Cus that’s all we are right#Blue-haired snowflakes who are so confused about our gender experiences that we fumble whenever asked#Like i love y’all fellow enbies with daring fashion but pls be more mean and confident about your identity#“What does that mean being a they/them”#I’m not a woman and I’m also not a man it’s that simple#“Is it that simple?” Yes what are you not understanding do you need me to tell you like a 5 yo?#I’m a brownhaired twink-looking gremlin who dresses like a skater boi who likes musicals and hates make-up and loves books#TRY to define me#Put me in one of your silly little boxes and see what happens#I’m gonna rip the box to shreds until there’s nothing left unless you leave me the fuck alone and let me pee in whichever bathroom i need#I have more pressing matters than worry about you thinking I’m confused but not empathetic enough to wonder why#There’s too much other really bad shit happening in the world for you to wonder if the blue haired young adult deserves to be taken serious
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noxtivagus · 2 years ago
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hmmm. oh my god my mind is a mess i rlly can't write what i want to rn but i will just Dump
#🌙.vents#YEAH HONESTLY OKAY one reason why fiction comforts me so much is. it teach me so much n let me live through so much more#these characters i. relating to them n seeing parts of myself in them is just. yk rlly comforting bcs i'm. very not social irl.#i get anxious. n typically i find that.. most ppl in like my class or my school or wtvr. yk everyone is interesting n has depth but#i find them. a bit too simple for me. ah.. yeah uhm. sorry remove the 'a bit' it's. by far. so.#hermes rlly. to me bcs he's like. different. felt alone for it. but.. he's intelligent he's valued n. theres a lot of ways to look at it bu#yh then he stands up n does smth for himself for once n he makes mistakes n then after that he sort of just gives up on that part of himsel#'internalizes the lies' THAT PART HURT SO MUCH OKAY. but.. yk fitting in n being 'normal' or wtvr gives a lot of ppl more comfort#but for me it hurts yes but i'd much rather face life for what it is. who i am who i really am. fuck if it's lonely for me#smth from the 1975 w matty on religion? sorry as well i'm.. really not religious. i respect it but please. i'm really not religious.#it would.. be easier yeah if we did believe in some divine being right? believing that there is salvation. that. there's.. yeah#i really just can't bring myself to believe in that. on religion i rmb rn even when i was younger like in lower school even i rlly thought#abt logic behind it. i questioned n wondered why people believed in religion. i really as. very curious abt stuff n life n all that#n growing up i've never really let the outside world influence me too much. no i pride myself in really staying true to myself.#so last year hurt sm bcs i really felt like i was restraining myself too much. i can't exactly pinpoint it rn okay i'm emotional rn but#i rlly felt like my freedom to be myself was stuck somewhere. n then stuff n 'talking too much' so tumblr became yh for me bcs#i don't want to isolate myself but i just.. can't do some things bcs of anxiety? or wtvr there's a lot n then there's also. uh#i still do crave vulnerability n belonging but how do i say this#it's really important to me that. i realize i open up more to ppl that also are able to open up as well. ppl who are like me.#like apollo n online friends n i love my irls too n i hate this bcs yh fine maybe i'm a bit of a ppl pleaser but it's more in a way that#i don't want to be misunderstood. i don't want to hurt anyone. so irl i generally tend to.. hide or restrain myself#take note of 'generally'. but i won't touch on that right now. i think i've been misunderstood before so that's why im sensitive to this#bcs. still having that love n care can coexist with still knowing myself n what works better for me bcs it's so crazy actually how w#several ppl i met last year esp the ones i only know online i cld open up to them more easily bcs they Too can do that n it just#feels so lonely irl i'm just dumping rn it's like nearly 1 am n i'll probably delete this tmrrw bcs i think i'm a bit frustrated right now#not that it's anyone's fault. i'm just. confused right now w myself but i don't mean anything bad by all this okay#i want to just. write. a fictional story rn to calm myself. doing things for myself surely isn't selfish. being myself isn't selfish right?#i can be kind to myself right now too. like other times before. so i will be kind. yes i will be.#there's sm in my head i rlly wish i cld write them all but such is the limit of being human. not too bad tho bcs i have stuff to do#i'll get that done rq n then i'll let myself rest though. until i sleep i'll let myself be at peace n rest c:
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