#and literally use it to hurt trans people

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia, I was talking to a friend the other day and we were debating whether it was ok or not to enjoy media made by people with different political views than your own.

She said it wasn't but I said it depends on the person but also because I think we shouldn't self-censor ourselves or judge the quality of the media by the opinions of the person/s making it. As someone who's studied media what are your takes on this? Thanks in advance ( ^_^)

Anon, this subject is way too broad for me to answer in a single post response.

It also highly depends on what the media is, and what the politics are. There's a difference between consuming something (and giving money to someone) who's just a mild asshole, and someone who is a literal rapist and has never experienced consequences for it, or someone who is literally giving money to movements that will indirectly cause the deaths of trans teenagers and is still actively doing that / not dead yet.

If you're the kind of person to give money to someone who will contribute - and has contributed - to the deaths of trans teenagers, well it's a free world and you can do that, but maybe don't expect to keep a lot of your trans friends and trans ally friends, and you yourself would not be a trans ally. You're not self-censoring, and the world isn't stopping you from doing that, but you might be someone who needs to feel more empathy for the people around you, or work on understanding why giving money to folks with monstrous politics leads to more monstrous politics.

If you don't want to live in that kind of world, you have choices you can make. But they're your choices.

It's not 'censoring' myself to choose not to participate in the works of something by someone who is doing things that could lead to a less safe world for me and fellow trans people as an example. I'm making a choice because I care about other people and because I genuinely would not enjoy the works of a person who created stuff who has said online: 'If you participate in my created works I'm going to assume you support my views (and so will everyone else).'

Making personal choices like this is not censoring, anon. (And I'm pro-censorship, lol, so even if it was, I'd still be like 'yeah contextually sometimes you have to' - censoring =/= banning). Technically censorship is something that can only be done by controlling bodies and government authorities anyway.

But we have to make choices all the time. If your friend is raped by another friend of yours, but that second friend buys you dinner all the time, do you keep seeing that second friend because like, hey free dinner! If your answer to this question is 'of course I would' - then like, well, I don't know what to say to that. We probably can't have a meaningful conversation about compassion or humanity.

Different levels of politics have different ramifications to different areas of society and different people. I'm trans, so I'm not going to support transphobic creators. It's really that simple for me. I don't want my fellow trans people to keep getting hurt by anti-trans rhetoric, and I'm pretty tired of it myself, so I avoid it, and I avoid the people who support folks who literally enable it to keep happening. It's an active issue with active and current repercussions. We're not talking in this instance about the politics of a dead author who can't hurt anyone anymore, or someone in prison, or someone who is so old they have disappeared offline into the ether.

If, on the other hand, I find out someone's a Republican but in all other ways they're mostly just living their life and not trying to actively harm people by funneling all of their personal money into things that will like...cause suicides due to promoting say, transphobia, then yeah, I might still engage with their stuff or support their stuff.

Likewise, if I watch or give money to a movie made by Weinstein, I will often think of all the other crew members and actors who had nothing to do with that behaviour who still deserve residuals or royalties.

Some cases are complicated, but some aren't. Some really are 'this person has said they will give their money to causes and governments that want to hurt us and eradicate us' and supporting that is the action of a transphobic person, even if that person doesn't feel transphobic. If the actions cause more hate towards trans people, it's a transphobic action, and it's kind of that simple.' And trust me, you can be trans and still be transphobic. We see internalised phobias all the time, everywhere.

Yes, I'm talking about JKR here, because I find this kind of question is usually about some obviously monstrous living person who is still doing monstrous things in a very ongoing way, vs. just a regular 'hey I found out this writer is pro-fracking and I hate fracking what do I do' or 'hey this author writes a ship I don't like should I hate them.'

(Look this might not be about JKR but it's certainly the first thing that's going to come to most trans people's minds and I'm trans, anon).

[awakefor48hours]

I don't care if someone who isn't trans wants to transition. I don't care if someone who doesn't experience gender dysphoria wants to transition. I don't care if someone makes up a new gender and pronouns just to feel special.

I don't care

I don't care

I don't care

I DON'T CARE

[amalg-em]

The thing about the lateral aggression I see in trans communities is that it's everywhere. All the time I see people parroting this idea that trans woman = most oppressed, trans man = spoiled manchild that never has any problems ever. And it's pretty disturbing how many people I've seen regurgitating it. People I cared for. People I trusted.

Did you know that transmasculine people have the highest chance of being a sexual assault victim? Higher than cis women, trans women, or cis men? But certainly that's nothing, right? Certainly that sort of trauma isn't the thing that irreversibly damages you, makes it harder to make life worth living?

Do you really think invisibility is a privilege? That being forgotten and ignored is beneficial? The last 12 months have been the worst of my life, and I've had the least support that I've ever had. Even my biological family has fucked off. The only thing keeping me from offing myself is the knowledge that it would leave my partner abandoned and unsupported. But surely I'm just being dramatic, right? Somewhere out there is a trans woman who has it harder than me, so how dare I complain.

The thing about suffering is that it's not readily quantifiable. It all sucks. It literally all sucks, all the time, and people can have the exact same amount and kind of suffering and be affected by it completely differently. It's utterly pointless to try to create some sort of hierarchy of most oppressed and we know this. We've known this forever. We literally have a term for it (oppression Olympics). We know that it's counterproductive and pointless to lash out at people on the same sinking ship as us because, well, MY end is lower in the water than YOURS so YOU don't get to talk about your problems. In fact HOW DARE YOU coin a term for the problems facing you, that makes you exactly the same as a TERF.

It's so fucking bleak out here. We could ALL be talking about our problems without demanding silence from others while we do it. We could be building solidarity with people who have different experiences, acknowledging those differences without trying to rank them, and give everyone space to be heard. There shouldn't be imposed scarcity of compassion - but there is, from people who claim to be compassionate, who claim to care about the struggles of people not like them. Not really though. Not unless you're the Right Kind of oppressed.

Today my social circle gets a little smaller. The world gets that much more hostile. And the noose of isolation tightens around my neck that much more. And somewhere, someone will find a vent post that I made while trying not to be another trans su|c|de statistic, and use that as proof that transmasculine people are a Lesser Breed of trans and don't deserve support, acknowledgement, or the ability to name & talk about our problems.

[blitz0hno]

If we are counter protesting for Trans Rights in front of like a legislative building or something can we all chant "WE HAVE MORE IN COMMON WITH YOU THAN THE PEOPLE IN THAT BUILDING DO"??? I will be screaming it at the oppressors in my community only bcuz c'mon you can't tell me half the people consuming Fox News every night aren't crying because their food stamps are about to run out same as us

And even if they aren't when some idiot films the protest all the on the fence liberals might think a little bit at least

[gutsondisplay]

L + Ratio + The psychiatric complex has a huge ableism problem, they are not the people you wanna be with + DID isn't the only way to be plural, this hurts even traumagenic plurals who healed and aren't disordered anymore + you mean tibetan buddhist tuplamancy is closed, not tuplamancy in general + not reading sources you don't like proves you don't care about facts + sysmed exists because its medicalizing plurality like transmeds did + transgender people made the term + you don't listen to ur own communities + you aren't the only trans person + ur a dimwit + you are not the creator of disorders you can't for sure say how they do and don't work + thats not how the brain works + admitting tuplamancy is closed and not "it doesn't work" implies it does work, meaning non traumagenic plurals exist + the literal creator of the term DID (and changed it from MPD to DID) literally said in an email that trauma isn't the only cause + you aren't in others peoples head + you can't prove they aren't a system + absolutely people can split off later in life, we have those written down + it's better to look into endos than call them off all together, the research is literally needed to prove your point anyways, if they didn't do the research then you can never conclusively say you're right + you fell off + you are not the only system to exist + your word isn't final, stop acting like it is + therapists despise this shit + who asked + you know you're only saying this for validation from other anti endos + you cited exactly 0 sources + the DSM literally had being gay in there at one point and had asperger's in books, which was only recently taken out, let's not use this one book as the end all be all + no one said alters were the only symptom + you are literally making up arguments to get mad at + get good + log off + talk to your therapist not the internet + not a good try + bad try actually + horrible try

if u come at me with a "source" on endos that mentions being transgender, tulpa, or even the word sysmed

im not fucking reading ur source

CDD is NOT comparable to being transgender AT ALL

tulpamacy is a CLOSED PRACTICE

and SYSMED IS ONE OF THE MOST TRANSPHOBIC TERMS IVE EVER SEEN AND NO ONE FUCKING LISTENS TO US TRANSGENDERS WHEN WE SAY IT.

you CANNOT BE TRANSPLURAL. thats NOT how disorders work

you CANNOT make the brain randomly start splitting. CDDS develope AS A CHILD

THEYRE A FORM OF PROTECTION. DID IS YOUR BRAIN BEING TOO OVERWHELMED AS A CHILD TO HANDLE TRAUMA THAT IT PUTS UP AMNESIA BARRIERS TO PROTECT ITSELF. NOT SILLY CHARACTERS IN YOUR HEAD.

ALTERS ARE NOT THE ONLY SYMPTOM OF DID.

and even if in the slightest chance you can have alters without amnesia and trauma, it is NOT CDD

reminder that in the dsm5 it literally says "if the symptoms are caused by a religious practice, or reported not caused by trauma, DID should not be diagnosed"

"oh but doctors are studying endos" THATS LIKE 2 DOCTORS COMPARED TO A MILLION OTHER PROFESSIONALS AND RELIABLE SOURCES STATING OTHERWISE. YOUR SOURCE IS BULLSHIT

[weirdstrangeandawful]

I'm going to use anatomical terminology here. If you don't like that or if you find that dysphoria-inducing, skip over this post -- I won't be offended.

Okay look. This isn't my community but it makes me so so mad anyway. I keep seeing responses to anything that mentions prosthetic penises or packers or even dildos that say some variation of 'what is the point of this' as a way of shaming the trans community.

The point is to allow anyone without a penis or without a fully functional penis (or literally anyone who wants to) to participate in sexual acts that they couldn't otherwise participate in. There is nothing wrong or sacrilegious about that. This has been happening since forever. It's accessibility. It's inclusivity. Yes, it disproportionately helps the trans community but it also helps the disabled community. It helps the lesbian community. It helps the gay community. It helps veterans. It helps the straight community. It helps peple with low or no fertility. It helps people with pelvic floor dysfunction. It helps people who've been through sexual trauma. It helps virgins who need to insert menstrual products. It helps literally everyone because you are highly unlikely to never encounter someone who fits into at least one of the above categories.

It's a safe piece of equipment, can we stop being weird and transphobic about it please???

[transmaverique]

gonna be honest I see anyone talking about this "my gender is more complicated than yours" shit as someone who genuinely cannot comprehend that other people that don't share certain traits with them can still in fact have rich interior lives. as an agender trans woman who uses she/her I've never had anyone say it to me who wasn't (usually unknowingly) transmisogynistic

see but im not talking about "rich interior lives" and the assumption that i am is exactly what im talking about. i am talking about the actual physical way that reality treats and percieves me in comparison to the way it treats and percieves you. saying my gender is "more complex" means to me that i am physically incapable of existing in a strictly binary world and that there is no thing i can pass as bc "binary man" and "binary woman" are both incorrect for me. and the Cisiety in question does not allow androgyny to exist - it is exclusively the timeframe people have to decide whether they think you are a cisman or a ciswoman, or a failure and a freak. i dont subscribe to that "binary privilege" shit, thats not how privilege works. but there are differences in the ways both you and i can navigate this strictly binary Cisiety!!! and those differences deserve to be named, imo

like. again. i dont have to comfort you about your own internal sense of gender before youll listen to me about my experiences in the real world as genderqueer. as a different sort of transsexual than you.

(and bc i Know what binary ppl love to say: i know not everyone is 'capable of passing'. what i am talking about specifically is the difference between being unable to pass as a cis woman or a cis man vs being unable to pass bc what i am does not exist AT ALL in a binary society, and both of those things are incorrect ans unattainable.)

(anyways if that language is too imperfect for you thats like fine but. its just confusing to me, i dont get why its hard to understand what we are talking about here. our experiences w our nonbinary genders are completely different! why do i have to discuss them like theyre the same?)

[panuccispizza]

anti fict people are like catholic fujoshis

[holyviolence]

omg i spent the whole day cleaning my entire apartment because my family was coming to visit and 1) so so so happy my adhd is being medicated now it's literally changing my life and 2) i FINALLLY got through to my dad about how he probably has ADHD too!!!!! he finally said Yeah i think i might have adhd. and my mom was like Me too (we've had this talk privately before, she knows she has adhd too lol) And my brother is literally transferring to a different school because he can't concentrate and isn't disciplined at his current uni. adhd family.

[andyinmiddleearth]

nobody is saying don't use inclusive language. 'breasts' is inclusive. it's not a gendered word, it's a body part.

*le sigh* I never said it’s gendered, because it isn’t. However, it can trigger dysphoria for some people, myself included. The reason for that is, a lot of the time when people use the word breasts they use it to talk about women, and when using chest it’s more gender neutral coded because men (and nonbinary and other gender expansive people) aren’t expected to have breasts because of cissexism. That doesn’t make it gendered, but it does associate them with the gender binary to an extent.

It costs 0 cents to not be an asshole and use the terminology that doesn’t induce dysphoria. If a trans/nonbinary person is fine with calling their chest breasts, that’s totally valid and completely their choice and should be respected, you do you. But that isn’t the case for everyone. You never know whether a trans person is dysphoric or not, or how bad their dysphoria is if they have it. In some cases, it could lead to people having a breakdown or worse. Anon, you’re sounding a whole lot like cis women that whine about being called “people with uteri” and ngl this reeks of TERF.

[robboybot]

Lmfao anytime five fuckers at uncle festers comes up on Twitter and people talk rightfully about how the creator is a POS and how people need to give those games the same vigorous hatred treatment HP gets the fans show how weak willed they are. They literally run to defend and bend backwards to the point their heads are inside their anus for their favorite conservative political donator and bigot Christian mascot horror “scrunkly”.

It could not be more obvious how so many people are so addicted to their conservative supporting media they simply refuse to ever let something go lmfao

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised though because if people actually gave a shit and weren’t apathetic selfish machines for consumption, things like S.park wouldn’t have a fucking “fan base” christ almighty

[foxgirlmoth]

I made it look like my gf told someone to seethe and cope over slur discourse how's everypony else doing tonight

I guess I wrote most of my thoughts in the notes oops

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Welp, if JK Rowling being executive producer and therefore being fully involved in the show wasn't enough for people to boycott, then here's HBO basically saying they don't care JK Rowling is a bigot from hell who literally helped lead a harassment campaign of lies against Imane Khalif in her transphobia and obsession with women being terf's standards of women alongside posting harassment against trans people on twitter at times, they gonna stand by her, while using the excuse, "personal views". Hmm, yes, personal views- that's one way to uh, call what the fuck JK Rowling comes out with a-lot- last I checked personal views do come with consquiences if said out loud....a thousand times in JK's case and still counting....especially if they hurt people, but hey, if it means making another Harry Potter project to milk, just let it fucking be I guess.

[gibbearish]

"can bi nbs say dyke" "can trans men say tranny" "can this specific identity reclaim this slur" ENOUGH !!! ALL that matters is whats in your heart when you say it. is there love for your community or is there hate for people not like you. are you saying it to hurt someone or to give a hurtful thing new love-filled meaning. theres your answer.

terfs are finding this now so just to head this off at the pass my tranny ass will not be debating you, you are going to be instantaneously blocked so you may as well save us both the trouble of typing out whatever long rant youre planning about how im an evil transsexual betraying the community by daring to call myself a faggot or w/e. also go fuck yourself

edit 2: hey terfies do you think perhaps that the fact you had to block me before purposefully starting fights with randos in my replies says something about the kind of people you are? do you think that's the kind of thing good people do? can you look yourself in the eyes and genuinely tell me that deep down you don't know that if you constantly have to lie and infiltrate and block evade to harass people, that just means youre a shit person? can you with a straight face say that doing these kinds of things actually feels morally sound, that there's no tiny sliver of yourself in there that knows youre acting like a piece of shit all the fucking time which is why everyone leaves you when they find out about your beliefs? could you honestly tell me that a person who acts like that is good, and that behaving like this actually makes you feel like you're adding something positive to the world? or is it just the rush that comes with punching a wall in rage?

you harass trans people for the same reason parents beat their children: it feels good to hurt other people when youre mad. it feels good to take your anger out on someone else. and so you find people you can hurt and you convince yourself youre doing it because theyre stronger than you, that youre fighting back, you punch and you punch and you keep punching on and on forever. because that anger is addicting and trans people have always and WILL always exist, so we will always be available as a target.

look at the way youre behaving and ask yourself if this is what you want to be doing with your life. and google the signs of a high-control group. and if youre going to be a piece of shit in my replies then at least don't be a major fucking coward about it. unless youre literally 12 you should not be arguing like a middle schooler starting fights about steven universe. grow the fuck up and get real problems

[leoninekelter]

Idk if you want to change literally nothing about yourself, not even your pronouns, and just identify differently i still consider you trans. Literally doesn't matter to me. It hurts more trans people to exclude people who are happily identifying as trans than it benefits. You use she/her and like pink and skirts but also like being agender? Idgaf welcome to the club. I love you

[sunnywalnut]

People can't even handle femme presenting afab folks using exclusively they/them pronouns and wanting to be called someone's girlfriend.

What makes you think you can handle the gendervoid goobers that use it/it's while working an office job?

Oh you meant... You meant the ACCEPTABLE quickly pixie dream girl type of queers.... Ah.... Um. Sorry dude. We're fresh out.

All we got is this short trans dude who makes paper flowers every Valentine's Day and refuses to bind because it hurts his ribs.

Oh. Oh goodness. Okay so uh. Sadly. We don't carry the fictional customizable gays either. No, we never have. This is real life. Fuck you.

I actually really hate how the "just call me a slur" joke went from being a critique of rainbow capitalism and faux inclusionism to being a way to make fun of nonbinary and aspec ppl literally just. having language.

"Joyfriend? Queerplatonic? Erm.. literally just call me a slur XD" shut the fuck upppp goddamn