#and like i said before. these are the Hands Gifsets of my heart

[sollucets]

love for love's sake || episode five

[bianca-mii]

One of the most iconic kisses between our guitarists from the 2022 tour. I can't write as beautifully as @woodswallow, but I made this gifset as I thought there is a very interesting thing to point out.

The Auslaender outro started almost as usual, with Richard feeling the music probably somewhat more.

But this moment shows one massive difference from arguably every other Auslaender's kiss: Richard is not smiling. He's not focused on seducing Paul with that evil grin. There's no tension, no predatory stare. He is... sad? He looks Paul in the eye, and while Paul is in that playful-teasing-I'm-not-that-easy-to-get mode of his, in which he rather avoids eye contact with Richard, he must realize something is off with the lead guitarist...

But they both go for the kiss. In the beginning, I thought maybe Richard was sad, at least partially, because during some of the 2022 shows Paul seemingly didn't feel like having that little smooch. From what I've read, Paul is very uncomfortable with PDA and, in general, tries to keep his private life as far from the public eye as possible. 2019 kisses were fun and outrageous, which Paul loves, and also had a political impact. But by the half of the 2022 tour, it was obvious nobody cared about any political impact anymore and the guitarists kissed just because they like it. Richard doesn't care if people are watching, he may even like it better that way, so perhaps he couldn't entirely understand Paul's hesitation. Also, on the previous show, still in Europe, their kiss was very quick, too quick for Richard's liking:

He made that gesture with his mouth as if he wanted to say: "Ahh, it ended before I could even taste it!" On which Paul said something, maybe like: "I've told you already: quick pecks - for the audience, the actual kisses - only you and me, no witnesses..." And Richard was like: "Oh, okay, but a boy can dream, can't he?"

Going back to Chicago's kiss: so it's not the case that Richard is sad because he thinks Paul wants no public kisses: they go for it as usual. I also don't think he's sad because he'd prefer the kiss to be longer - that doesn't sound like an actual reason to feel sad. It has to be something else.

Whatever it is, Richard tries to pull away first as he probably thinks the kiss will be over by that time anyway. Indeed, it's usually been (if not any other time) Paul who pulls away first; I also think Richard's hand on the back of Paul's neck used to be there for that extra control, to keep him in place just a little bit longer, but it wasn't hugely sufficient. This time though, again, Richard thinks the kiss will be over just after a moment. But what happens next? Especially from this angle, it seems very clear: Paul doesn't let go. And his reaction is really intense: he keeps his lips locked with Richard's, his right hand, put on Richard's shoulder, grabs it more firmly; you can see all his body leaning on his partner; if you look at his butt, it slightly goes up as he maybe even gets on tiptoe.

I remember reading suggestions Richard was that surprised because maybe Paul slipped him some tongue. I'd love to think that, but what I believe really happened was that Paul sucked hard on Richard's lip to keep their mouths together as Richard tried to pull away.

This is not the best quality, but it sort of confirms that theory: you can briefly see Richard's mouth, and then how it literally gets sucked:)

Paul pulls away when it's over but also slightly pushes Richard: "now, that should do!", but Richard, despite experiencing a massive WTF?! moment, remains sober enough to put some pressure on Paul's nape, doesn't let him go, and pulls him back close again, for a hug. He also starts to laugh so heartily that it makes my heart melt. Perhaps he's realized what face he's just made and laughs, just a little bit, at himself too. Paul, on the other hand, briefly returns the hug, but then is all like: "there, there, don't overdo it, babe." He gives Richard a few pats on the back, like the male friends with no benefits would do - he is back into his no PDA mode, and puts his right hand back on Richard's shoulder, this time trying to push him away.

But now Richard does not have it: "nah love, not so fast, you should have expected now I need to thank you for what you've just done... *mwah*". Another kiss on the lips, brief one this time, and finally Paul can go, obviously showing to everybody: "look! Just look at this little naughty thing right there!", Richard is doing something similar for a moment, too (what a complete pair of dorks:D).

So, I imagine Richard was so surprised because Paul not only didn't want to end the kiss quickly but literally forced it to be longer. I love this moment so much for two reasons: it totally makes sense Paul is uncomfortable with PDA, but as soon as Richard feels worse, or Paul gets sentimental himself (like by the end of tours), Paul stops thinking about any discomfort and goes for it with no hesitation, which pretty much says that comforting Richard is simply much more important for him. I think we saw it here, we saw it during Puppe 2023 or this tour after the German football team lost.

What I also more than love, is how Paul's little mouth-to-mouth treatment really brings Richard back to life and turns the night into the day for him (no wonder, who wouldn't be more than alive if they just got a kiss from Landers himself?). Richard is over the moon here, and seeing him undergo such a 180-degree mood switch is an almost otherwordly experience...

Here's the whole video cropped by me, original credit to till_lindemann_pics on ig. One of the other gifs by @davecumstaine, the other one - I can't tell, I downloaded it a long time ago and can't find it here anymore, many apologies;(

[confessionseddie]

2024 💖

tagged by @butchdiaz and @saryasy and @livingincolorsagain for a 2024 fic roundup (thank you!!) but since i didn't publish all that much fic i'll include some gifsets too just because i'm proud of them :) @cinematicnomad also tagged me in a 2024 in gifs roundup so i thought i'd combine the two 💕 bit late but hey.

AUGUST

most popular: buddie in 6x01 favorite: gayddie in season 6b my first proper gifset for 911 before i was even really in the fandom :) i still had 911 blacklisted while i was watching so i wasn't spoiled for anything, and watching eddie in s6b in particular felt like.... well, it made me want to actually make a gifset after the hobby had been soured for me for a while. also i think many now beloved mutuals found me through this post so 🫶🏻 thank you eddie

SEPTEMBER

most popular: eddie in 4x06 favorite: buck + it lingers for your whole life :)

OCTOBER

most popular: buck in 8x03 favorite: parameddie in season 8a honarary mention: eddie's hands in 8x04

FIC

kerosene (6.5k words, E) dear to my heart kerosene, which was as much a love letter to buck as it was a little bit of selfish catharsis-- i think i'll never write anything as good as this again and i'm completely fine with that.

NOVEMBER

i'm pretty sure this month rendered me temporarily insane. luckily i wasn't alone in that.

most popular: good cologne / hence the button down favorites: gossip eddie the sheer joy i felt making this and it only took me like two hours. i was genuinely smiling grinning chuckling kicking my feet the entire time. whimsy eddie forever and: bobbyeddie something i wouldn't really have thought to make myself but my dearest kasia suggested it and i thought. why the hell not. this gifset is probably the one that took the most effort out of anything i made last year but it was also the most gratifying in the end :) and the response i got upon posting was SO lovely i felt my heart warm for weeks after :')

FIC

groom (548 words, G) a drabble from a fic that will never see the light of day, probably. haha but i think i got all their voices right and it felt like an actual scene from the show which i was proud of considering i often struggle with dialogue. DIAZ (3k words, E) my most kudosed fic ever :) i reread this one myself all the time because it feels so cozy. i love when the words just pour out of me and buddie sort of write themselves. freaks 4 monogamy buddie my beloved risky (ryliver, 3.4k words, E) yeah. 🏇 did not expect anyone to even read this honestly lmao, considering i posted it anonymously. half writing challenge half blacked-out-watching-rg-dance-in-his-underwear kinda situation pulmonary (4.5k words, M) while this is not polished to perfection i still managed to write what i wanted to write :) i got some of the loveliest comments i've ever received on any of my writing here, too, so it was all worth it

DECEMBER

most popular: brat taming - a guide by eddie diaz favorite: the above forever and ever :) best thing i've ever posted.

some sap-- said it before, will say it again, this is the most fun i've had in fandom in years and years. i love coming here and posting my silly lil gifs and words, and i appreciate reading every single tag or comment or message anyone ever sends me or leaves under my stuff so thank you!! MWAH. 💋💋

[thequeenofmyownscreen]

My thoughts about episode 6, season 3 of The Legend of Vox Machina :

Château Shorthalt !! Oh my god, I'm so happy they managed to incorporate it in a way that feels natural. The song is amazing, I was just dancing, you guys.

There was just too many moments to do screenshots of, and I already saw amazing gifsets I shall reblog, but let me be clear. My favorite 2 seconds are this :

KEYFISH !

Oh my gods. As soon as I saw Vax trying to talk to Percy in the bath, I knew what was happening. I was watching mith my friends and sister, so I couldn't say anything. But they guessed what was going to happen anyway !! And they loved it. Oh, the Queen that is Laura Bailey strikes again. I rewatched the original scene from the Campaign, and guess what, it's still so good, she's just SO QUICK !! And Liam being outraged only ads to the hilarity.

the statue of Scanlan with the cube. I shan't say more.

Awww, Vax and Keyleth angst !!

My sister loved the little purple ghosts, btw, and she's right. They're so fun.

The Scanlan/Pike scene broke my heart. Sam is so good at doing crying voices that are both funny, a little pathetic, and just so full of heart.

Ok, so the attack on Whitestone by the little dragon babies of Thordak is a big change, compared to the Campaign where Whitestone doesn't get attacked, and Vox Machina has more time to do things before the eggs hatch. On the one hand, it's a bold move (and bold moves are a CR specialty), and it's clever in how it moves the timetable rather urgently, putting pressure on the group ; on Percy because this was Rippley and it gives him a reason to act impulsively and lead him to... Glintshore... ; and also on Scanlan, who was one again forced to chose between VM and his daughter. On the other hand, like my friend said : Why would ANYONE in Whitestone want to stay there after the Briarwoods AND that dragon attack ??

This made me laugh so much. That woman is escaping from death and she is affronted by Pike's language :

Oh, interesting. The small change also is : they broke their fragile trust with Raishan. I wonder how this will translate to the final battle, because we know VM can't face two dragons at the same time, and I think the order of the events in that battle (Thordak, then Raishan, with the result we know) is important. So, what will be the other change there...

Guess we're going to Glintshore, then.

[stardustloki]

Get hugged, Echo!

No one had ever really hugged him before. The vode were affectionate, and he’d been on the receiving end of many an arm round his shoulder, slap on the back, or a playful punch to his arm. Roughhousing was pretty much routine. This… wasn’t…

Or: Echo gets used to Omega hugging him.

Tags: Echo & Omega, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, written for @summer-of-bad-batch

Inspired by @ffdemon's awesome gifsets of all the Echo and Omega hugs here. It has been living rent-free in my brain since I saw it! It makes my heart melt!

Read it under the cut, or on ao3 here.

It caught him by surprise, the first time she did it, and it took him a couple of seconds to realise that she’d launched herself at him, wrapping her arms tight around his neck, because she was trying to hug him, not attempting to inexpertly execute a grapple that she didn’t have the strength for.

Huh.

He crouched, frozen, as Omega tightened her grip, sniffling slightly into his neck, before abruptly realising that he should probably be hugging her too. He did so, hesitantly, unsure of how he was meant to be doing this, how tightly he should be holding her.

No one had ever really hugged him before. The vode were affectionate, and he’d been on the receiving end of many an arm round his shoulder, slap on the back, or a playful punch to his arm. Roughhousing was pretty much routine. This… wasn’t…

He wasn’t sure how he felt about it yet.

When she let him go, leaving him reeling for reasons that weren’t solely his decision to leave the Batch behind, he noticed tears gathering in her eyes and his heart clenched.

“Yes, sir,” she said, voice wobbling as she responded to his earlier order that she should keep up with her training. The order he'd given before suddenly finding Omega launching herself around his neck. She rubbed a hand across her eye.

But no, this wasn’t the time for doubts, there were a lot of his brothers out there who needed saving, just as the Batch and Rex had saved him, and he knew it. He also knew getting emotional about goodbyes never helped anyone. So, he made himself keep calm for Omega, shooting her a slight smile.

“Keep an eye on them,” he told her, satisfied when Omega gave a slight nod. Good, she’d handle this better if she felt useful.

It didn’t stop him feeling regret when he watched the ship take off, wondering if - despite what he’d reassured his sister - this might be the last time he saw this family - his family - ever again. Still, this wasn’t enough to make him rethink his decision. They had each other, who did the other clones have apart from Rex and the small team that Echo was going to be part of? No one. He couldn’t turn his back on the others. 

This was something he had to do.

—

It took him less time to adjust when Omega leapt onto him under the bright sunlight of Pabu. He still felt himself freeze, but less than a second passed before he’d wrapped his arms around her, holding her close and preventing her from falling to the ground.

“We’ve missed you!”

He could hear the warmth and emotion in her voice and it was like being hugged all over again. It felt good. No, more than that it felt incredible, and he found himself smiling like he hadn’t done in months as relief flowed through him.

It turned out he hadn’t lied when he’d told her they’d see each other again. And he hadn’t realised how uncertain of this he’d been until now.

“It hasn’t been that long,” he grinned, setting her down safely on the ground. With everything that had happened to him and his new team since he’d left, it felt as if he’d only been gone a day, though, staring down at Omega now, he wondered if there wasn’t a part of him to which it had felt like years.

He’d missed them, a lot more than he’d realised.

—

Echo didn’t want to say that he’d given up hope on finding Omega, because he hadn’t. He’d figured she’d still been alive, out there somewhere, but they’d searched and searched and searched and searched, and the Empire’s security had just been too good.

At some point, you had to get pragmatic about things.

So, that was what Echo had done, he’d fallen back on his training. Brothers died, all the time, that or they were captured, or suffered grievous injuries that made them unsuited for life on the front. Sometimes, they just got transferred somewhere different to you. The point was, never at any point in any of their lives had it been guaranteed that whoever mattered to you would be with you the next day. And you could grieve, you could rage about how unfair it was, but at the end of the day, you had to pick yourself up and keep going.

It had felt like a betrayal to Tech, a betrayal to Hunter and Wrecker, a betrayal to Omega, but as the weeks passed, it had been obvious that it would take a miracle to find her.

Echo couldn’t work miracles, but the more time he spent lamenting that, the less of his brothers he’d have been able to save with Rex. So, finally, he’d left, in order to do something that would actually help people.

And now, with the knowledge that Omega had been found, he was feeling like more than a bit of an idiot. Though, he supposed that, from what Hunter and Wrecker had told him, she and Crosshair had rescued themselves, so perhaps it didn’t matter that he’d all but given up on his and his brothers’ ability to locate her.

When Omega raced towards him, he was ready for her this time, holding out his arms so she could rush into them, and then hugging her tight.

She was here.

And she was alive.

[spectordameron]

I'm working (finally) on my tros anniversary gifset, and it's reminding me that the rise of skywalker has my favorite Rey scene in it, because it's so... quintessentially Rey, and it's the scene where they meet Zorii.

She doesn't come out with her fists ready to swing like Finn does, but she keeps a wary eye on the confrontation. When Zorii suggests that Poe worked with her, Rey asks him for clarification - you can see her little startled blink when Zorii cuts him off before he can explain.

But she doesn't take Zorii's word for it, like Finn, she (gently) asks Poe for a confirmation - and maybe there's a little bit of underlying interest or excitement to her inquiry. Possibly because Rey seems to have an interest in the underworld ("han solo, the rebellion general?" "no, the smuggler"), or maybe because Rey's glad to see she and Poe are a little more on equal footing than she thought (see: the entirety of Through the Turbulence).

Rey only becomes a truly active participant when it goes from a standoff to a proper ambush, and doesn't even take out her saber until the last minute. She takes out all of Zorii's crew in one fell swoop, carefully keeping Finn and Poe both safe (and giving me their truly adorable reactions to her kicking ass which I'll treasure forever).

The lightsaber is a last resort to stop the fighting, to give her a chance to ask Zorii for her help. And when Zorii replies that she knows Rey doesn't care but she thinks she's okay, Rey assures her that she does care, and offers Zorii her hand.

And I really feel like this scene best encompasses who Rey is; someone who is comfortable hanging in the background to observe before jumping in to her friends' defense, who refuses to believe the word of a potential enemy unless she has cause to believe they're telling the truth, who uses a lightsaber as a last resort, and offers compassion instead. It's such a neat moment that highlights what Snoke said in the Last Jedi, that Rey has the heart of a true Jedi.

[thegeminisage]

STAR TREK UPDATE TIME, holy shit! tuesday we watched ds9's "a time to stand" and "rocks and shoals."

a time to stand:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGH

i feel like ds9 is so fucking good every episode i rate "watch" on ym spreadsheet would easily be "must see" in any other trek show. where do i even fucking start

i love that theyre just casually mentioning bashirs darkest secret in playful banter now. theres something in there that makes me very emotional but also it's extremely funny. also, he really DOES quote percentages like a vulcan. whatever he and garak were doing, i don't know what that was but i loved it. literally his boyish smile

oh speaking of couples. KIRA AND ODO. they've got the station all to themselves...um, e quark. i did get deluded for a hot second, when they were all at the bar together, into believing in kira e odo e quark. i don't think that's going to be a permanent feature in my psyche but it was fascinating to experience just once

ODO. MAKES HANDS. TO TOUCH PEOPLE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!

no one made this gifset so i have to make do with a screencap

HE MAKES HANDS TO TOUCH PEOPLE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i may have had to pause the episode to start screaming

also. hi. "im glad you can still smile" "only when im with you" what if i threw myself into the sun

dukat and kira, holy shit. i've never been so scared in my life. i think about it all the time that he essentially called leeta into his office to fuck him. he BLOCKED KIRA'S EXIT. jesus christ we've come so far from his gay little fireworks show and the thron in his ass

odo manipulating weyoun who's obsessed with him <3 king. but he only did it because <3 kira asked him to. he literally said i've walked this horrible horrible line before i can do it again...their relationship is somehow moving forward because they are going back in time

and like GOD she knows he loves her and she hasn't decided how she feels back but somehow it's still comfortable because he doesn't ask for anything...IMPECCABLE fucking vibes. WHO is doing it like them

on the spaceship side, all of that was very fun, especially sisko and his <3 headaches. but even funnier was them getting stuck 17 years away from help. JUST like. star trek voyager

rocks and shoals:

AND IT GETS BETTER!

kira in this episode. mwah. she quite literally can't live with herself and it's SO clever because at first you the viewer are also like aaaa no dont let the bajorans protest aaaaaa theyll get in trouble and then kira has the change on heart and youre like oh shit. oh fuck. whose side am EYE on?

also, the fact that this was also odo's kneejerk reaction, and she said "don't make me fight you too" and he immediately fell in line. that's love.

garak's "oh, NO" as they were falling. please let the man say "oh shit"

o'brien ripping his pants <3 incredibly funny i felt like i was getting loopy right along with them. the wide shot of the flaming ship sinking into the sea as they laughed their asses off.......cinema

poor dax!!! she tries so hard to be brave but man she really did get fucked up

the little vorta freak in this episode...i want him dead. what an evil thing to do to your own guys AND one of sisko's people died too because of it. ik they won't kil him but they should kill him

i wasn't expecting the thing between garak and nog to have like consequences but it was funt hat they brought it back up. good for them and good for nog, even though i still wish it had been bashir on the post

julian being so chirpy and cheerful w the vorta after fixing him up as though he is a normal patient...sir please control yourself

my only complaint is i wish jake had more to do...right now he just seems to be getting underfoot, when staying behind was supposed to be a sign of maturity. hopefully all his reporting isn't for nothing!!!!

TONIGHT: voy's "day of honor" and "nemesis"

[cinematicnomad]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @zainclaw and @andavs 🥰🥰🥰

How many works do you have on ao3? 39 apparently

What's your total ao3 word count? 288,797 words

What fandoms do you write for? actively right now? nothing really lol. haven't published a fic since 2022. but i guess you could say 911 and teen wolf given some random WIPs in my drafts. also i randomly started jotting down some notes for a stranger things steve/eddie fic that will probably never be written.

Top five fics by kudos 01. take my hand (take my everything) (buddie) 02. taste your beating heart (sterek) 03. so show me (family) (buddie) 04. you never said a word (sterek) 05. be careful (my darling) (buddie)

Do you respond to comments? yes, always! i usually try to wait until i have a dozen or so, which can sometimes take a bit of time, but eventually i respond to it all.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? i have a sterek drabble called and i fell heavy into your arms (688 words) that is basically derek seeing stiles die and then immediately letting himself be killed

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? most of them?? not sure i can think of one specifically that was happier than the others.

Do you get hate on fics? ah, i almost said no, but then i remembered that for my fic taste your beating heart every now and then i'll get scott fans who think the fic should be tagged as "bad friend scott mccall" even though he's NOT a bad friend in the fic, it's just a nuanced view of their changing relationship. like, that fic is about 3 main things that include: stiles and derek getting together, solving the main mystery, and stiles and scott's friendship maturing to a place where they can love each other and still be brothers without thinking they need to be in the same pack!! like it's FUNDAMENTAL.

anyway, i had one reader who i think quit the fic halfway through bc i gently pushed back on their rage comment insulting derek and stiles for a fight that takes place with scott. the reader left an angry reply to my response, which they then deleted before i could even look at it, and then never commented on the fic again even though they'd been commenting on the fic since chapter 1.

Do you write smut? no not really. i don't know why i'm so bad at writing sex, but i am very bad at writing sex.

Craziest crossover i have no crossovers

Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of??

Have you ever had a fic translated? yes, someone translated my mike/harvey suits fic trembling hands into russian all the way back in 2013.

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? i have not!

All time favourite ship? to write? to read? no idea, so i refuse to answer.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i've got a sterek idea that's an AU of the netflix show virgin river. i had a pretty brief outline that i sketched out some, and even started writing a little, but it never went anywhere. i did create an AU gifset for it and every now and then when people start reblogging it i think about going back to try and write it.

What are your writing strengths? i think i'm good at realistic dialogue? but i don't know. i haven't written in a while so i'm not feeling super great about my writing at this very moment.

What are your writing weaknesses? i suck at setting a scene. and conveying a complex emotion. also i feel like i get v bogged down in what characters are physically doing or whatever and i try to describe it and it just detracts from the story over all. yikes ok i'm feeling worse about my writing than i thought lol

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? if the context is there to understand what's being said, great. otherwise, just adding context to the dialogue tag (he said in french, in german, etc) works. personally i'd prefer not to scroll back and forth between the fic and the notes to figure out what's being said.

First fandom you wrote in? harry potter. on the site quizilla back in the year of our lord 2005 lol. i started off writing like. a harry/oc fic lol where the protagonist was the classic american exchange student who had her own prophecy. truly mortifying!!

Favorite fic you've written? i have a soft spot for taste your beating heart bc it was the first long fic i ever completed and it took me 7 fucking years to write it. but i think my favorite is actually finding our way (back home) which i really think captured everything i was aiming to do. will i ever be able to do that again??? who fucking knows. probably not. on the more self-indulgent side, i really really love the margaret buckley character study i wrote called so far from who i was.

tagging!! @woodchoc-magnum, @crazyassmurdererwall, @tattooedsiren, @machtaholic, @catdadeddie, @tripleaxeldiaz, @valleydean, @thisapplepielife, and anyone else who wants to do this.

[coloursflyaway]

That's so sweet of you to even reply! Um now that you've put me on the spot 😂..honestly I'm a bit clueless 😅. I'm not very imaginative. I just really enjoy reading zowens and so far the few I've read from a couple of you guys have been reallyy good reads!

All I know is that may be something where it's mutual pining and Sami's lost all hope but it's actually not unrequited?? May be a bit of possessive Kevin thrown in? Idk 😭 is what I just said even classified as a prompt??

PS. I know you said you haven't watched wrestling in a while but did you happen to catch the zowens moments at wrestlemania at all! ? 😍😁

Hi!!

So, first of all, great prompt, fits them fantastic, loved it. I just ended up overdoing it by a little, I think, so now it's not really a prompt fill anymore, but a whole fic 😂 really didn't expect that because writing has been Hard lately, so thank you for that!!

Here's the AO3 link, but I'll include the text here too.

PS. I have mainly seen the gifsets of them, but they are!!! so!!!! I love them ♥

There is a brand-new, shining belt in his hands and Sami is aware that this should be the happiest moment in his life. It isn’t. He looks down at the silver plates, the leather strap, heavy and solid and everything he worked for, and he’s happy, of course, but in the back of his mind, he knows that it doesn’t compare to - Well. No matter. Some things you cannot have; Sami has learnt that years and years ago.

Kevin’s face is shining with joy about the match he won and the beers he has had to celebrate it, and Sami’s heart aches at the sight, fierce and wild and beautiful. “The next time”, Kevin mutters into the too-short distance between them, and when Kevin takes another deep swig of his drink, Sami knows that he will have forgotten the words the next morning, “the next time, we’ll tag and we will take all of them out. Jus’ you and me, we’ll fuck them up and send them back crying to their mothers. An’ then we’ll do it again, and again, and again, until we’ll get a shot a’ the titles and then we’ll take ‘em too. An’ we’ll be unstoppable.”

He’s beaming and leaning in and Sami feels himself swaying closer, cannot stop himself. Kevin is magnetic, always has been, and Sami sometimes wonders how long he’ll be able to stop himself from giving in to his pull.

There is a knock on the door of his dressing room, which finally pulls him out of his reverie. Sami takes a moment to compose himself before he answers, wiping silly fantasies from his mind that he has known to be useless for most of his life now like he would wipe tears from his eyes. He’s used to both, after all. “Come in!”

The door swings open, and he shouldn’t, but Sami knows who is behind it before he sees Kevin standing there. “Shouldn’t you be celebrating?”, Kevin asks instead of a greeting, stepping into the room like he owns it. In some way, Sami guesses, he does. “What makes you think that’s not what I am doing?”, he asks back, getting up, because knowing Kevin, he’ll be pulled into a hug within the next thirty seconds. Knowing himself, he won’t ever be able to turn down a chance to be close to Kevin.

His words draw a laugh from Kevin’s lips that Sami treasures, and just like Sami knew he would, Kevin wraps his arms around him the second Sami has stood up. The edges of his belt presses into his stomach painfully, but that is a small price to pay for the comfort of Kevin’s thick, warm arms around him, the faint tickle of Kevin’s beard against Sami’s neck.

“To start with”, Kevin begins to answer while still pressed against Sami, only slowly pulling back, “because you are in here and not out there, where you should be. Also, because I have known you for more than half my life and this isn’t your celebratory face.”

“Sounds good”, he replies easily, then adds, “only that we’ll have to wait a bit longer with doing that, I’m booked to tag with Quicksilver the next show. But after that…” He doesn’t expect more than a scoff – Kevin isn’t that fond of Quicksilver, but then again, he isn’t fond of a lot of people – but instead, Kevin’s face darkens, his brows furrowing and his eyes suddenly glistening in the dim light of the bar. It’s a look Sami half-recognises from the ring, because the intensity is almost the same, but there is something else mixed into it. Something dark, something dangerous, something alluring.

He’s right, of course he is, but Sami still tries for a few moments to come up with an excuse, before he finally nods. It wouldn’t make a difference, saying anything else, when Kevin knows him so well. “It’s nothing”, he adds, because he can see Kevin starting to worry within half a second. “Just a bit of nostalgia. Reminiscing about the old days, you know the drill.” “How old?”, Kevin asks and, thank God, the smile is back in his voice and his eyes and Sami wants to luxuriate in it, wants to stay here forever. In any moment with Kevin, really.

“Ring of Honor old”, he replies with a wry smile, because it almost feels like a confession; to be here, at the pinnacle of his career, and thinking about being young and dumb and so, so hopeful. Again, it makes Kevin laugh, makes him clasp a hand on the side of Sami’s shoulder; a point of contact that is so warm it would be enough to sustain him through a winter. “That is old.” “I know.” “Anything special? Or just the general beauty of horrible hotels, being sixty percent bruises and having to put me in bed after I drank my weight in shitty lager?”

There is something about old wounds, the way their pain becomes familiar, almost an old friend. Sami’s lips tingle, remembering, his heart aches, dull and yet fierce, but he smiles nonetheless, too used to the pain for it to feel disruptive.

“All of the above, I’d say.”

“Quicksilver?”, Kevin repeats, and even his voice is different, rough and full of something that Sami doesn’t understand, yet desperately wants to. “Yes. You know, silver and blue mask, used to hang around with Scorpio Sky?” “I know who he is”, Kevin replies, but his voice hasn’t changed. Maybe Sami missed a fight between them in the past? “Why are you tagging with him?”

Sami self-consciously pushes a hand through his hair; it’s becoming too long again. “Well, he asked and I didn’t see anything wrong with giving it a shot. He seems like a-” “You shouldn’t tag with anyone but me”, Kevin interrupts him, and suddenly Sami does recognise what is dripping from every word he speaks: hunger. “Fuck Quicksilver. Fuck all of them. They don’t have what we have. They never will.”

“Doesn’t sound very celebratory”, Kevin states, but there is humour in his voice. “How about tomorrow, after I win the United States Championship, we’ll do it properly? I don’t think I’ll be able to give you the customary three dozen bruises until then, but if you really miss it so much, I am sure we can find some terrible highway motel we can crash in. And as long as it’s better beer, I don’t mind drinking too much of it.”

It’s a joke, of course it is, and a sweet half-serious offer to relive a bit of a time Sami misses dearly on occasion, and yet it’s suddenly too much. Because he has a title in his hands, because out there, there are thousands who cheered for him, and yet, it isn’t the happiest moment in his life, not by far.

The familiar ache in his chest breaks open like the earth cracking in half to spew fire, and Sami knows that he cannot keep the pain from his face even before Kevin reacts. But react he does, worry suddenly clouding his gaze, the hand he still has on Sami’s shoulder gripping harder.

“Sami?”, he asks, and his voice is too much, his gaze, his concern, his friendship that has never been all Sami wanted. “Are you alright? Should I get a doctor?”

“I’m okay”, Sami manages to force out, but he doesn’t sound it, not even to himself. “Just. Don’t say that, Kevin. Not with the… the shitty hotels and the drinking.” It takes a moment to get a reaction, which Sami understands; he isn’t making sense, after all. But then, all of a sudden, Kevin’s expression crumples, his shoulders drop like a burden, half-forgotten, has been forced upon them once more.

“I’m sorry”, he mutters, fingers tightening reflexively around Sami’s shoulder before they fall away. “I never… the last time, when I got so drunk you had to take me to my room, you never told me what happened, even if I have an inkling… I don’t think I ever had the guts to say it, but I’m sorry. For whatever it is I did.”

“Kevin”, he breathes out, unsure, because surely this cannot be happening. Sami has been aware of his own feelings for years, but there is no way they could be requited. And yet, there is a glint in Kevin’s eyes that looks like yearning; and yet, Sami’s heart picks up its pace, spelling out in morse code: pleasepleasepleaseplease.

A moment of silence stretches between them, thick and viscous, then Kevin knocks back the rest of his beer, before crushing the can and dropping it on the floor. “Fuck it”, he mutters, and Sami wants to ask what he means, but before he can get the words out, Kevin reaches out, one hand on Sami’s hip, one on the side of his neck, and pulls him in. He tastes of gas station beer and stale chips and almost ten years of quiet, desperate, hopeless longing, and even before he manages to kiss back, Sami knows that this is the happiest he ever will be.

“What?”

Kevin isn’t looking at him anymore, but there is so much pain written in clear, horrible letters across his face that it washes away the ache in Sami’s chest; how could it matter, when Kevin is hurting right in front of him?

A wry laugh escapes Kevin’s lips, which might be the worst sound Sami has ever heard, but then he speaks, still not looking at Sami, and makes it worse. “I’m sure you remember it as well as I do, that one night when we were still in ROH. Before you started tagging with Quicksilver. When Chuck, I think, got all that horrible beer from the gas station around the corner and I just didn’t know when to stop. I never had the guts to ask what happened either, but you were so different afterwards, didn’t want to be touched, to be alone with me… and the scribbling on my arm… tell me if I’m wrong, but after some time I figured that I probably, you know. Kissed you. Which I shouldn’t have, of course. Against your will. So, don’t worry, I won’t do that again. Ever.”

“Did you sleep well?”, Sami asks the next morning when Kevin opens the door of his hotel room, looking dishevelled and hungover and utterly beautiful. For once, they had splurged on two hotel rooms instead of sharing one, and while Sami wishes he could have woken up next to Kevin, maybe even wrapped up in his arms, this, too, is wonderful.

He hands Kevin one of the coffees he picked up at a nearby café, idly wondering if this could become his thing now, treating his… his Kevin to coffee in the morning. After all, he usually is up far earlier than the other.

“Ugh”, Kevin replies, taking a gulp of coffee before even trying to form words, and it might be the most enchanting sound Sami has ever heard. “Think so. Can’t remember much. About sleeping or last night. Did you get into a fight, by the way?”

“What? No, no fights”, Sami replies distractedly, wondering if that means Kevin doesn’t remember their kiss, wondering if that means they will get to have two first kisses. Almost smiles at how much he will get to tease Kevin about it if he really has forgotten. All but plans to start the story of how they got together with this from now on: you know, I was in love with Kevin for almost a decade and he kisses me and then immediately forgets about it! Can you believe that?

“You sure?”, Kevin asks again between sips of coffee. “I know my handwriting is awful and drunk it’s even worse, and the letters are really smudged, but I wrote Don’t fuck with Sami on my arm last night.”

It takes a moment to sink in through the layers of happiness and imagined mornings and afternoons and evenings together, but eventually, Sami learns what it feels like to have the world end while not making a sound.

Sami recognises the pain on Kevin’s face; it’s the twin of his own, the one that has been with him for so long that it has found its permanent home at the bottom of his heart, with him in every moment he spends with Kevin, every one they are apart. It’s old and it’s weary and it’s familiar, and Sami should hate it, but.

But if his heart houses the other half of it, then that has to mean something.

And then Kevin says kissed, and for a moment, Sami thinks that he remembers, before realising that, no, he doesn’t, and somehow that is worse.

“You did”, he answers, and finally, Kevin looks at him again. His eyes are wide and terrified and still beautiful, and Sami hasn’t allowed himself to think it for a decade at least, but he loves him so much it is tearing him apart. “You kissed me that night. And then you didn’t remember it the next day, only had that writing on your arm and I thought you were trying to warn yourself not to do it again. But. Kevin. I kissed back.”

Kevin stumbles into his room, his lips still tingling with the last kiss Sami pressed onto them before closing the door behind him. Smiling so brightly Kevin thought he would burn up just looking at him, so happily that Kevin wanted to burn. Sami. The name alone is enough to make something within Kevin break open and pour out six or seven or eight years of pure love into the space between his ribs. He can’t explain why he had the courage to kiss Sami tonight, when he had sworn to himself he never would again and again and again, but now, knowing how Sami’s lips feel against his, how his hair feels between his fingers, his body pressed against Kevin’s, he thanks every divine entity he might believe in or not that he did.

Sami.

The alcohol is making his movements sluggish and sloppy, but Kevin manages to find a pen at the bottom of his backpack anyway, stored away for – maybe, hopefully – signing autographs after the show. He didn’t, but not even that matters anymore, because he needs it now for something much more important.

Don’t forget kiss with Sami, he writes on his arm, letters sloping and curling into each other, a smudge across half of it.

Not that he thinks there is much risk of doing so. After all, hadn’t Sami kissing him back been the happiest moment of his life?

There is no answer for several seconds, Kevin just staring at him like he has changed his life and hung the stars and the moon and the sun itself, and Sami is stuck in place until he isn’t anymore. Because the first time, years and years ago, Kevin had been brave enough to take the first step, and afterwards, Sami hadn’t dared to do the same. But maybe now is the time to return the favour.

Trembling, he picks up Kevin’s hands, which are warm and familiar, have caused as much hurt as they have healed, and puts them on his own body: one on his hip, the other on the side of his neck. And he steps closer, until he’s so close he can read the hopeful disbelief in Kevin’s eyes, can feel that the other’s breath has stopped.

“It was just like this”, Sami explains, and Kevin’s gaze drops to his lips, shoots up again as if he has to make sure that Sami wants this. “You didn’t want me to tag with Quicksilver. Or anyone else. You said that they could never have what we have, and you were right, and then you pulled me in and-”

Kevin kisses him.

He tastes like chewing gum and Red Bull and love, and Sami drinks him in until it feels like he is drowning, and even before he manages to kiss back, Sami knows that this, now truly, is the happiest he ever will be

[shrinkthisviolet]

Director's Cut for the little things (give you away)?

How I love this fic 🥰 it was my first attempt at writing Saviris within the bounds of canon—the tragedy of them, and how that's so tied up with the brightness of Westallen, is so intriguing to me, and so underexplored (which ties into Savitar's true identity as Barry being underexplored, but I digress).

As I said jokingly to one of my mutuals when first posting this, this fic came about because I got pushed "one gifset too far". The scene itself has been written with a Saviris slant before (and I highly recommend it), but really, it's the many gifsets that finally pushed me to try my hand at Saviris myself. From Iris's perspective, of course.

On that note, if you haven’t read this fic, I highly recommend doing so before reading this ask response, since it does answer something that I intentionally left unanswered in the fic.

So without further ado:

It starts a little earlier that I originally meant it to, with Savitar's appearance on E2 to kidnap Iris. I was originally going to omit this in the final version (this was just to get me in the zone), but I ultimately decided to keep it. I think in this scene, Iris's perspective on Savitar is so interesting:

She’d seen that expression before, on Barry: he had the upper hand, and he knew it. Though Iris had only ever seen it on Barry when he was teasing her, not…

...

The words were out of Iris’s mouth before she could really process what she was saying—really, she couldn’t look away from Bar—Savitar, from Barry’s kind features twisted in a sneer, a gruesome scar covering the right side of his face.

How did he get it? What happened to you, Barry?

Terror and pity swirled in her in equal measure, but all she could do was fall back into her instinctual nature: protect, defuse, shield. All else could come later.

She keeps seeing him as Barry, instinctively. No matter how much she tries, she cannot see him as anything else. The similarities to Barry hurt, they're painful...but they also let her see this:

Savitar smirked before affecting an expression of mock sorrow—still not quite meeting her eyes, she noticed.

It's something no one else takes note of...but she does. Of course she does. She knows Barry like the back of her hand, but this is Barry. It's also how, in the following scene, she can stand up to him and call him out:

“You can hardly meet my eyes, and you’re sarcastic more than you speak from the heart…and I know why. You and Barry are one and the same…and you can’t hide how you feel from me. I know what you’re like when you’re hiding something, remember?”

...

“So,” she said, “don’t play me for a fool. You’ve found a way around this, I know you have, so why don’t you save us both some trouble and tell me? With sincerity this time,” she added sternly. “Cut the sarcasm.”

...

“I pose that to you now.” She crossed her arms. “You want me to trust you, but you won’t even be honest with me. How does that work?”

And she even cracks his shield a few times:

Savitar’s lips twitched, but he scowled instead of the smile Iris was certain he’d suppressed just now.

...

“Frustrated is a strong word,” he muttered, seeming oddly abashed suddenly.

...

“Come closer,” she added, emboldened once more.

“Why?”

“Eyes are the windows to the soul, right? I want to fact-check your sincerity.”

He laughed then—a laugh closer to sincere than she thought he intended. “Only you would say such a thing. Fine.” He walked steadily closer to her…stopping when their noses were almost touching. “Close enough for you, Iris?” He murmured.

Her breath caught in her throat, but she nodded. Though she took comfort in the faint blush she saw spreading across his cheeks—she wasn’t alone in her feelings, then.

Saviris’s proximity to Westallen is what makes it so interesting, isn’t it 👀

...

He hesitated, something flickering in his expression.

...

“I’m not…good with that,” he said finally, still not looking at her. “With trust.”

...

He chuckled bitterly. “Not everything. I didn’t tell you about…about being the Flash, or…or about my feelings for you when it mattered…”

Hmm he inadvertently admits something here 👀 quite a contrast to his scathing words earlier:

“Well, how convenient for you, then, that I have it,” he sneered. “Wouldn’t want you kissing the aberration by accident, now would we?”

Fun fact, this is the first line I wrote in this entire fic, and it’s my favorite 💞 it’s so him

(Also notice who makes Savitar look up in the first place when he's so occupied with his plans 👀 very telling. It’s not his partner in crime…but his heart)

In the end, Savitar rejects her. Reasserts his identity as Savitar, not Barry. It's too late, though. He's already admitted he's Barry—even though the rest of canon proceeds the same, Iris has seen beneath the mask. He can put on his gleaming metal armor, can put up all his walls...she's won this battle, the same way Barry will win it in 3x23 with the Masonville story.

And, also, there's a fix-it aspect to this too. What version of Barry could ever kill Iris, even if his life depended on it? No version, that's what. So...

“So yes, I found a loophole.”

“And that is…?”

“That is…for me to know, and you to find out.”

It's not too difficult to guess the loophole, I'm sure 😂 it's an idea I got from this fic, actually (an amazing fic, I definitely recommend it. It’s labeled OT3, but it’s really more of a poly-V)—they came up with a clever loophole for Savitar that’s been my headcanon ever since. His “loophole” is to revive Iris with his new godly power, and keep her as his Iris forever, away from Barry. After all, it’s Barry’s life he really wants, Iris included, the finale proves that. The rest of the season just does a really bad job showing it…so I wanted to imply that his ultimate goal wasn’t to kill Iris…but to steal her away in such a way that Barry would never know (without jeopardizing his existence, in other words)

Also, as a bonus:

“I forgot how much tact you lacked, Caitlin,” Savitar sneered, without looking up. Out of the corner of her eye, Iris saw Killer Frost flinch.

She was trying to kill her. Logically, Iris knew this.

But the more emotional part of her remembered her friend, who had sat with her and encouraged her to pursue Barry. Who had defended her place on Team Flash. Who had gone out for drinks with her, played darts and laughed with her.

Caitlin Snow, with a warmer heart than most people realized. Killer Frost was assisting in Iris’s murder, but…Iris would believe in her friend—in Caitlin—up to the bitter end. And in that vein…

“You got what you wanted,” Iris spoke up sharply, “there’s no point in bothering her about it.”

Savitar couldn't care less about Killer Frost, that's canon. Iris, though? She looks at KF and sees her friend, Caitlin (because the show ought to have emphasized their friendship more). She speaks in KF's defense when Savitar won’t. It's sweet but also so sad 🥺

(Also helps explain why she forgives KF so quickly in s4. I reject that “work friend” nonsense)

Now ofc this is not the last time I'm gonna write Savitar, and it's not even the last time I'll write Saviris. But this was a fun way of inserting a moment of them into canon, to give Iris a win with him like Barry gets one...to further emphasize Savitar's feelings for Iris and establish that they always existed 🥰

director’s cut ask game!

[gamerism]

😎

Top. 5. yakuza/rgg quotes? I know there are probably Many, but I am Curious. And you know what, who said honorable mentions can't be included too lol.

This one goes out to the translation team ig. Wouldn't be here without them ect ect. There probably are a lot of honourable mentions because this series has a lot of great moments but I'll contain myself to the 5.

5. "No point? You're just makin' things harder on yourself. Deprivin' yourself for no damn reason. You think the world gives two shits if there's a point or not? Keep that up and it'll break you." -Majima YK/1

(And doesn't it just? Doesn't this exact thing break Kiryu down piece by piece? That's something I love about a moment that's so early, that was written so long ago. And how it's come to reflect the series as a whole.)

4. "Hamazaki left a message for you before he went. 'Keep the Tojo Clan safe from the cops. It's the only proof left that guys like us ever existed.' [...] It took me forty years to realise this. But for guys like us... our lives aren't really our own. There's always someone new to help. Someone we need to protect. These past few years, I fought that fate with all I had. But I'm done fighting. It's time I accept the hand I was dealt." -Kiryu Y4

(I can't help but think about the Implications whenever I hear this quote and Kiryu's headspace from 4 on, & especially in 6 as well.)

3. "Once you step into the shadows you're stained black for life. No gettin' that mark off ya. But... You can still choose who you bring down with ya." -Majima Y0

(🥲🥲 always so ouchie)

2. "Every girl dreams of becoming a star one day. I wasn't any different. But the reality is I had already found what makes me whole. I thought that if I could make it as an idol...I'd be able to keep the orphanage running. But it came at a cost. I would have to leave behind the very man who raised me. [...] Even though he was unconventional, I could always rely on him. I...I think of him like a father. And I love him. I love him very much. [...]" -Haruka Y5

(I cut this short but this whole speech makes my heart ache so bad. The definition of illogical action done for deep emotional motivation. & Kiryu doesn't get to hear it. 😭)

1. "I'll let you in on a little something, The yakuza game, it's not like boxing. The man who gets beat down isn't the loser. The guy who can't tough it out till the end, he's the one who loses." -Kuze Y0

(Yes I know that's probably obvious considering I used this for a gifset recently, but it's really just stuck in my mind since I first saw it.)

Though speaking of honourable mentions while coming up with this list I did think of a) a late game ishin scene i like a lot but its long, from multiple characters, and i don't actually want to spoil it for people so :)

And b) ishin's final scene probably says something profound at some point but its genuinely 20 minutes of uninterrupted dialogue and my brain fucking groans and turns off whenever i watch it. so.

[feldspursfiyero]

just a short fic feat. anthony and violet that i had in my drafts, which i am in danger of losing, because i put a lot of things in my drafts... so that's why i'm just gonna post it now. it's not good enough to go on ao3 imo. and it's inspired by something that i've now forgotten. but maybe it had to do with this gifset.

missing scene during 1x04

a/n: i just wanted someone to tell anthony during the course of s1 that they recognised that he was trying, and learning, and slowly handling things better, and that it wasn't for naught, and that they APPRECIATED HIM

"Anthony." Violet's voice comes from behind him in the hallway, stopping him in his tracks.

He turns, spine stiffening, chest tightening, mind rapidly, uncontrollably flitting back through the past few minutes, days, weeks. He had just told Daphne that she could choose if she wanted to marry the Prince; did he say something wrong there? Or was it that he arrived late to tea? Or that he took his sister to that boxing match? Or was it something to do with after dinner last night, when he did not stay as long as he should've, as he had work to do in his study? Did his mother notice his disappearance? Was he boorish as usual with his siblings? Did he ignore something she had said, or dismiss her too easily?

It's always the same, he thinks as resignation floods his body; it always boils down to him. Whatever it is this time, he should've tried harder. He should've done more. He should've been better, or perhaps just not been himself at all. Now his mother will tell him what has slipped his mind, like she always does, and she will insinuate that he was not good enough, as if he doesn't already know a thousand times over that he will never be good enough. He is not his father. He never will be. He has done so much wrong.

He has yet to speak. "Yes?"

She approaches him as his heart pounds and he hovers somewhere outside his body, drifting further and further away.

"It was very kind of you, allowing Daphne to choose."

He shakes his head after a moment. "What?"

"What you just did." Violet smiles, coquettish, surprised, and almost pleased. Pleased about what? Him? "She has always known her own mind; I am glad you have come to realise that."

He stares at her, automatically hearing the censure in her words. Or maybe there isn't any? Maybe he is going mad?

"Well." Her smile fades to a more muted colour; in fact she seems almost flustered. "I will not keep you; I am sure you have other places to be."

"Yes," he says, and turns from her, because this is what he knows how to do. "I will not keep you either. Good day, Mother."

He makes it down to the street before he can breathe again, climbing into the waiting carriage, once again alone. But then what his mother said comes back to him in bits and pieces, fragmented recollections that faintly hurt his head, formed under duress.

It was very kind of you. I am glad you have realised that--

It was kind of you--

He rubs his temples, the pressure aching, increasing--

It was kind.

He slides down in his seat and glances out the window; slowly his hands stop shaking. His reflection in the glass, barely visible as it is--he thinks after a while that perhaps it is smiling back at him.

[sweetestlamb]

The Best Revenge

Author's note: I saw a beautiful gifset from @seawherethesunsets and it's been a beautiful trip down the rabbit hole ever since. This drama really swayed my heart and I just needed more happy moments of my stray cat couple together.

Summary: Camping can be in tents. 🏕

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The rain cascades down in soft patter hitting the tarp that Dongjin had so effortlessly and diligently put only moments before the rain storm began. He had purposely came camping knowing it would rain, said he enjoyed listening to the sounds of drops on the tent.

She hates the rain.

When she was young and lightning would clash in the sky like two kids battling with pots she would run into her father's room and straight into his arms. And he would be waiting, arms open to catch her and soothe her with a large hand on her head and melodic hums in her ears.

She hates that the rain brings back happy memories, hazy recollections that seemed like another life that she couldn't get back no matter how she wished.

It hurt in a crevice of her heart that she refused to acknowledge. The same heart that she tried to turn stone cold since she was seventeen and it shattered for the first and last time.

She'd been successful until him.

She lifts her eyes from her sausage sizzling away in a metal pan to watch his long body as he stands still with his head tilted towards the onpour. He's beautiful. There is a lightness to him now that she never thought could be possible a year as she watched that dejected back walk away time after time.

The humidity leaves his bangs wet and partially plastered to his forehead, her gaze lingers there before traversing down the slope of his nose and convening on his chapped lips. Further transfixed as a pink swipe leaves them glistening and moist. She recognizes that bubbling in her stomach now.

Hunger.

"What are you staring at?"

She blinks slowly as his low voice cuts through the loud silence of the rain and not much else.

"You. I don't want to forget a thing. I want to look at you until I get my fill."

But that's a lie. There's no filling the void in her chest that remained when she walked away from him that dreadful day.

Her ears perk at his low chuckle, more tightening in her belly.

"Your sausage is burning." He teases nodding at the meat hissing in front of her.

And with a curse she shifts her gaze poking at it with a chopstick and thankful that it didn't burn too much, it was still edible. She bits a large piece and hums at the succulent array of flavors that burst on her tongue.

"Mmmm."

She takes another hardy bite and chews until his prolonged quiet catches her attention.

When their eyes meet the contact is electric, a live matter that surges from her heart and fills her body with anticipation.

"Is it good?"

He watches her swallow and his Adam's apple bobs in reply. His expression is too bright and she feels caught under his gaze.

"Delicious. Do you want?" She holds the meat out towards him and gulps as he accepts bending those infinitely long legs and sinking his teeth into her offering with a low grunt of satisfaction.

They haven't kissed since they decided to do.....this. Again. Seeing him again was enough for her, being here with him is more than enough but watching him this close, only a breath away from her has her feeling greedy for things she's never yearned for before.

"You're staring again."

That's new. Him teasing her and smiling so brightly it's as if he's trying to make up for lost time. He has the perfect lips, made for smiling. But perhaps that's not all. She can think of other activities they would be great at.

"What's on your mind?" He's level with her now, finally taking a seat beside her.

She feels her face flush in embarrassment but knows that if she utters the words on her mind then at least that feeling can be shared between them.

"Your lips and activities they would be great at."

Her assumption is correct and his cheeks redden at her insinuation but he never looks away, bold as ever. Not backing down.

"Independent activities or paired ones?"

She doesn't miss his eyes lingering on her own lips but the moment is broken as a thunder grumbles in the sky, they both jolt back as if pulled back by invisible strings.

They awkwardly go back to eating in silence and she pretends not to notice as he rocks his chair a bit closer to hers until their knees are brushing against each other and she can feel his warmth all over her like a blanket.

"Is that my shirt?"

She glances over her shoulder, long strands of her hair following as she turns her head.

She feels naked under his intense gaze sweeping up and down her figure, she's wearing his shirt and not much less. She had her own shirts of course but she was allowed to do this much, he was hers after all.

"Mmhmm" she responds airily turning back to arrange her bedding, fluffing her pillow and smoothing the sheets.

"If you continue this I might have to go out and stand in the rain."

She doesn't turn but she can feel the heat of his words caressing her ears. He was closer than he was before.

"Don't. You'll get sick." She responds with steel in her words.

"I feel sick right now. I can't think straight."

Bliss blossoms in her stomach, aching at the longing in his voice.

She doesn't know how to reply. This game is not one she's accustomed to.

"Turn around." She twitches at the light command in his voice but almost bursts into laughter at the hesitation on his face, it's so easy to read him now. That's new too.

"Come here." He reaches for her, cupping her cheeks in this warm steady hands and she lets out a dizzy breath as he draws her closer still.

"What do you think?"

She's dazed at his sudden questioning and all she wants to do is close this damn gap remaining between them. Pry his mouth open and stick her ton--

"About camping in the rain? It's not too bad right."

He smiles down at her and she stops second guessing herself with an equally bright grin she nods, "It's amazing. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else with anyone else."

And as his eyes are widening from her confession she makes her move, dragging him down to meet her and stealing his breath. Kissing him is sparks and comfort all in one, like coming home after a long journey. She presses even closer eager to taste all he has to offer, thirsty for him. Starved even.

Her hands dig into his hair, her hips lock into his own, her tongue takes control of his mouth thrusting and swirling.

As the rain continues to fall around then, she decides this will be her memory of rain. A happy memory that won't hurt.

His love has already given her the strength to forgive and although she can't forget her past she can choose how to live in her present.

She's choosing happiness and never looking back.

[rmd-writes]

it was a toss up whether I would share this gif set for today's 12 days of fandom post or this one (please go check it out, it's so very Tarlos) because they're both favourites of mine, but in the end the heart hands won out, mostly because of Rafa being adorable and checking if he remembers how to do it later!

I've said it before and I'll say it again, but people falling from one of my fandoms into another is one of my favourite things and @reasonandfaithinharmony is no exception!!

Rules: Every day for 12 days in December, choose a fandom work from any fandom from 2023 that you loved. It can be anything you like - a gifset, a drabble, fanart, a fic, or just a post that made you laugh.

Reblog the post and add a comment or tags about why you love it.

Tag your post with #12 days of fandom

Heart tutorial with Danielle Savre, Stefania Spampinato, and Rafael Silva

First Responders Reunion (June 4, 2023)

[nrnyx]

Part of a Sterek/Merman AU I’m working on writing. I’m about 20k words in so we’ll see how long it gets! Making these giftsets/Mood boards keep me motivated. Enjoy!

Gifset 1 - Gifset 2 - Gifset 3 - AO3 Account

Derek laughed under his breath as Scott grumbled and took off after the frisbee Jackson launched way too far just to be an ass. The sun was starting to set and they would need to pack up soon. They’d needed this though. A day in the sun on the beach. Graduation was done and college acceptance letters were pouring in. It would be their final summer as carefree teenagers and Derek wanted to make the best of it for them.

“Oh shit!” 

Derek was on his feet instantly, running to where Scott had disappeared behind a few large boulders. He wasn’t the only one as the rest of the pack followed. “Scott, what is it?” he asked as Scott came running back out pale and heart racing with adrenaline. 

“I don’t know man but I think it’s dead!” 

Derek slowed, seeing that Scott was okay but shaken up by whatever he’d seen. He held his hand up for the rest of the pack to stay behind him and cautiously walked around the rocks to see what had spooked his beta. 

At first, all Derek could make out was a long dark gray fin, speckled with silver that sparkled as it caught the light from the setting sun. It was partially covered in sand and seaweed, and Derek didn’t recognize the fin as anything he’d ever seen before. It wasn’t a whale or shark fin. It seemed too large to just be a fish, but it had scales like one.

Then Derek’s eyes moved up to the top half of the creature and widened in surprise as he was met with pale skin dotted by beauty marks, an ethereal-looking face that was very much human in appearance, and soft brown hair. 

“Oh my god!” Lydia gasped from beside him, and before Derek could come out of his shock and grab her, she ran forward and fell to her knees beside the creature. “Derek, do you know what this is? It’s a merman!” Her hands were shaking as they hoovered over the merman.

“He’s bleeding,” Cora said, pushing past him now, too because Derek was still trying to wrap his brain around what he was seeing. Merfolk were the most elusive creatures in the world. “We should call mom. She’ll know what to do.” 

Lydia moved to touch the tail, but Derek growled to stop her - finally coming out of his shock. “Don’t touch him. We don’t know if he’s dangerous.”

“We can’t just leave him here!” Lydia protested, and Derek knew that look in her eyes. He wouldn’t win this argument.

Derek ran a hand over his face. He needed to call his mom. He needed to contact Deaton. Why did his pack attract impossible situations like this? 

Derek looked down at the merman again and knew they couldn’t leave him like this either. If it were someone from his pack in this situation, Derek hoped the strangers that found them would give them the benefit of the doubt. Derek could see now that there was blood staining the sand around him. It looked to be coming from a deep wound on the merman’s right side and a broken spear tip sticking out of his left shoulder. 

“Can he even breathe on land? Should we like… put him back in the water?” Scott asked, and Derek rolled his eyes. He sometimes forgot that Scott wasn’t born a wolf. Derek reminded himself again that he needed to do a better job educating those members of the pack. 

“They can breathe on land.” Derek at least knew that much. He walked forward and knelt beside Cora. 

Derek reached out and pressed a hand to the merman’s neck. His skin was cold and clammy, but he was part fish, so maybe that was normal for them. He had a pulse, but Derek already knew that from the faint sound of his heartbeat. Some part of Derek just wanted to feel it beneath his fingers too.

“Isaac, go grab the jeep and pull it up as close as possible. Erica, grab towels or blankets - whatever you can find to cover him up. Allison, call Deaton and let him know we are coming. Maybe your father, just in case. Cora, call mom and let her know what’s happening.” 

Everyone nodded and took off to perform their duties. 

“He’s a warrior,” Lydia stated, moving a few pieces of seaweed off the merman’s tail.

“How can you tell?” Derek studied the tail closer, and it answered his question. 

It looked powerful. Derek had seen popular illustrations of colorful, delicate, decorative tails, but this was not one of those. The tail itself was a slate gray color with silver flecks throughout and heavier reflective silver on the fins. The fins weren’t flowy or delicate but sharp and pointy like a steel blade. It looked like they would have no problem slicing through delicate human skin. 

“I’ve seen his tail in the bestiary. Well, maybe not his tail, but ones like it. They’re warriors. He must have been hurt in a battle.” Lydia explained, waving a hand at the young man's wounds. He was that Derek realized - a young man. Younger than Derek, but not by much. Had he been human, he probably would have graduated with the others this year.

“Deaton said to bring him quick if we want to save his life. He said there could be poison in the spear tip. So don’t try to touch it,” Allison said, jogging back over just as the headlights from the jeep provided them with more light. Erica also rejoined them with a bundle of towels. 

“Lay some of the towels down. Jackson, Boyd, help me pick him up.” Derek ordered.

“Oh, that’s gross!” Jackson complained, grabbing one side of the tail as Boyd grabbed the other. Derek put his arms under the merman’s back and shoulders while Lydia steadied his head.  

“On three… 1... 2… 3.” As they lifted, eyes opened, and Derek felt his breath catch. Beautiful whiskey-colored irises stared back at him, and Derek didn’t know if the merman could understand a word he was saying, but he felt compelled to say something. “You’re safe. I’ve got you.” After a few seconds more of eye contact, the eyes closed, releasing Derek from whatever hold they held on him. 

Derek would have been lying to himself if he said he wasn’t shaken to his core.

[tykobrian]

Insp: meta by @sandraharissa​

Following are some of my own musings regarding this scene which is in no way essential to enjoy/ comprehend  the gifset:

Before having read sandraharissa’s meta on the above scene, I used to get blue in the face with frustration over how Vi’s last comforting (It’s okay) words had no calming effect on Jinx. Because, years ago wasn’t Silco, the literal guy who was about to murder all of Jinx’s family, able to start winning her over with these EXACT same words???? 

Silco comforted her after Jinx did his job for him by inadvertently killing her family. Years later it seems history repeated itself when Jinx granted Vi’s wish of getting Silco out of Jinx’s life by inadvertently killing him. Yet when Vi, by coincidence, tried to comfort Jinx using the exact same words Silco used on her all those years ago, it doesn’t work? In fact, it backfires? What the hell is going on here?? 

I think it all sums up to how Jinx always put Vi on a pedestal and saw their sisterhood as one-sided (And worst of all, for me to live, I gotta kill the part of me that saw that I needed you more) and how Silco was able to establish himself and jinx as equals. Let’s backtrack. 

I think we all agree that while Jinx loved Vi very much she was always down thinking of herself as a burden to her and her family. The council archives transcripts shine some light on Jinx’s perception of Vi and their relationship. As far as Jinx is concerned, she always failed in ways that mattered and suspected Vi of secretly resenting her. It didn’t matter that Vi made sure she had enough chance to practice her fighting skills out in the field so to speak, what mattered is with Vi she always screwed up. All this and coupled with Milo’s incessant bullying along with Claggor and Vander’s apparent indifference made her think that they weren’t a family after all. 

However, being with Silco seemed to change everything. Not only was Jinx able to make impressive bombs/ gadgets and weapons, but she was also able to make herself into a formidable fighter who Silco relied upon. Silco trusted her enough to make her an integral part of his operation. If Sevika and Marcus’ words were to be believed then yes, she still kept screwing up. However, this time her accomplishments were enough for her to not let her failures weigh her down completely. In addition, Silco had years to open up to her and convince her of how similar they were. Perhaps it irritated Jinx but it had its intended effect. Jinx believed that she and Silco were broken in the same way and she was loved and trusted by him. Besides, he had all those years to show her how he was there for her while Vi was not. In the end, Jinx ended up mistakenly believing that Silco, with the help of Marcus, kept Vi and her apart by locking her up in Stillwater. She also stopped believing that Vi abandoned her because she identified all the times Silco said so as him manipulating her. Lastly, she blamed him for taking everything away from Vi and her. 

“He took everything from us. Right here, he stabbed Vander in the back. Just like he planned to do with me. ll the time saying you abandoned me when he knew the truth. Liar.” 

I don’t know if Silco’s death and last reassuring words made her drop any of these beliefs but I think Jinx still had a soft spot for him because she associates all her accomplishments with being with him. 

On the other hand, although Vi came back into her life, she never showed any signs of accepting her present self of Jinx. Look, I KNOW they barely had time to interact, let alone have any time to have a proper heart-to-heart to be on the same page. However, in the end, Jinx thought that she had enough evidence to see that Vi has changed too much to accept the changes within her. While I am glad to see that unlike years ago, she isn’t going to settle for jumping into the arms of anyone who will console her and try to fit into their life, it still hurts, you know? Especially when you think hard enough you realize that Silco would have never wanted to blow up Piltover and openly initiate an all-out civil war. If I was able to understand Silco, then I think he would have used fishbones as a deterrence like many nations in our world uses nuclear weapons intending to dissuade their enemies from attacking them. Sure, he hated Piltover and his hatred ran way deeper than that of Jinx’s, but he was much more strategic and took any step only after weighing the possible consequences. 

Back to Jinx and Vi. She thinks Silco’s death would have finally freed his and Jinx’s grip on her Powder. Oh, how wrong she was. Anyway, you all know how little time she had to process Jinx’s transformation yada yada yada but I think for now Jinx has decided that no words will ever make them how they used to be. On the other hand, I think it will take Vi years and years to acknowledge the positive roles Silco played in her sister’s life. Or she may never understand how Jinx could ever have a soft spot for him. On a different but related note, Jinx’s resentment for Caitlyn will only go up from now on. 

So, lots of drama to look forward to in Season 02 I guess. Will JInx ever realize that like her and Silco, Vi is just as broken? Will she realize that since she has become Vi’s equal in her combat abilities and perhaps even surpassed her, she doesn’t need Vi the way she used to anymore?