#and it was so frustrating. hence. the almost crying. but I was like
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Me: I have real actual experience for this job.
Job: That’s pretty good. We’ll definitely consider you as a viable candidate.
Me: I can pass a drug test immediately and I’m reliable.
Job: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE COME WORK FOR US PLEASE PL-
#personal rambles#it didn’t go *exactly* like this lmao but it was definitely a huge factor in me getting the job#at the end of the interview the interviewer said he was impressed with me and liked my attitude#but that he was required to interview other candidates so they’d get back to me in a few weeks#and then an hour later I got a call from my recruiter saying I ‘blew them out of the water’ and they won’t be interviewing anyone else#I straight up almost cried and quit like five times tho#it was a rough fucking interview#two goddamn hours#if you’ve never done a welding interview it’s usually like. three parts?#the first part is standard talking interview#the second part is the welding test which can take anywhere from 15 minutes to a couple hours depending#I’m. stubborn? so I don’t think it usually takes that long??#but I was given scrap to run as many beads as I wanted and it was fucking stainless which I hadn’t done in four fucking years#so it was not up to my personal standards (I KNOW I can do better welds)#and it was so frustrating. hence. the almost crying. but I was like#this is free practice and worst case scenario I will impress them with my refusal to quit when it’s challenging#so I decided to keep running beads until they made me stop#and whaddya know I did in fact impress them#I even had issues with contamination (not actually my#my fault it was the equipment and another factor)#but what he was looking for was that I knew *how* to weld not necessarily good welds?#and I had fantastic penetration 😏 with no burn through and even and consistent welds#which again. not necessarily enough to get me the job. which is where my stellar personality and ability to pass a drug test come in#I’m not too worried about the actual job? it won’t all be stainless and I’ll also have training on the job#and I’m a quick learner.#but yes.#I have a job now!#yay!#(important bc my wife works at a chicken place for barely over min wage)
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He found out he’s not the highest rated anymore….isn’t taking it too well <<
#wallowing in that feeling of missing out or not being good enough for others standards (or even your own tbh) :))#no but actually I hope no one takes this post the wrong way#it was actually very therapeutic to draw this?#I know some people don’t like seeing their comfort character in distress but for me it’s almost reassuring#knowing that even this silly guy has hard days. Makes them feel human and sympathetic?#like they understand hardships and still persist despite it all#I hope no one takes offense :( don’t worry he’ll be feeling better about it soon enough 💜#but I also have no issues with this art being taken humorous#(because he do be ugly crying like a desperate teenager that got rejected)#reminds me of the ‘no your cringe’ meme someone else drew Mr. Puzzles too lol#so you can interpret this art as serious or silly I don’t care either way honestly#My inspiration here is that after he was defeated he kinda spent a couple days upset about it#started to cut apart star shaped fairy lights in frustration and cut out paper to resemble stars he wished he could have#just kinda going berserk in outrage obsessing over star shaped objects to fill that void#hence why it looks like there’s arts & crafts and Star glitter everywhere on the floor lol#but like I said you can make up your own story and narrative for it <3#hplonesome art#mr puzzles fanart#cw crying#tw crying#mr puzzles crying#crying mr puzzles#smg4 mr puzzles fanart
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I want this every day (Charles Leclerc)
Charles has been frustrated with the team's strategies and the results he's been getting lately so you find a way to cheer him up
Note: english is not my first language. I was going to write it earlier on the week, but then I felt like I a jinxing it so I stopped... but after today, I think it's a good place to start...
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: mentions Jules Bianchi
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3
Another race weekend where he was out qualified by his team-mate left Charles with the feeling that if it came to it, he was almost one hundred percent sure they would ask them to swap positions.
Points for the team would be important anyway and they came away with a good amount and the car showed to be competitive enough considering the RedBull dominance on the grid, but the frustration was still there.
With the team and with himself.
They told him they'd keep him - there wasn't a quesion put down about his contract -, Il Predestinato wasn't something he carried lightly but often times it was confusing. Without the support and appreciation from inside the team, it was proving difficult to achieve their goals.
His childhood dream was driving for Ferrari and Suzuka always carried a heavier weight for him. As he took off his helmet and was faced with the number 17 on the side, he apoligised. To Jules, who he wanted to make proud every day but even more on this particular track. To his fans, who deserved better than this. To you, who were there for him, arms open for a hug and a shoulder where he could cry and let his feelings out on, to hold him and remind him every single time that all of the nonsense commentators and the media still had the audacity to say about him despite his continous shows of intelligence, skill and talent, and to love him.
The way you loved him was something he had never felt before and had never thought he deserved.
The face you were giving everyone in the garage that dared look at you wasn't unfortunately a rare occurrence, hence the fact that so very few team members approached you, "Charles is just finishing his interviews, he should be here soon", Silvia said before excusing herself from the garage.
You walked to your boyfriend's driver room, knowing he would end up in there soon enough after greeting the mechanics and engineers.
He stepped inside the room less than fifteen minutes later, finding your embrace immediately as his arms wrapped around your waist, "it's not fair that this keeps happening", he mumbled.
"I know it isn't", you kissed his stubbly cheek while rubbing his back soothingly.
"I thought I could've done so much better, for the fans, for you, for Jules", he hiccuped, letting himself be vulnerable after bottling up everything he was feeling.
"You did us proud, Charles - he is always so proud of you", you cupped hisface in your hands as you hoped the words got through to him, "okay?".
The flight back home had Charles sleeping most of the time, the whole rush of the weekend catching up with his body as he slept with his head on your thighs, your fingers playing with his locks while you arranged your schedule for the week ahead.
"I was thinking we could spend some time together today", you said over the phone, hoping he hadn't booked anything since you made sure that Andrea and Joris had cleared his schedule so you could make this happen without a hitch.
"You don't have work?", Charles asked, "no, I arranged a few things and a meeting got cancelled", you explained.
"Good, I don't have anything to do either, I was just going to stay home, but being with you sounds much nicer, my place or your place?", he wondered.
"My place, please", you replied immediately, "I just want to change my clothes and I'm feeling like spending the afternoon in", you tried, hoping he would catch on and not mess up your surprise.
"Okay, amour! Do you need me to pick you up from work?", Charles asked and you heard a small smile on his face. You weren't sure why, but Charles really got a kick out of dropping you off and picking you up from work, so you felt bad for the answer you were giving him, "it's okay, you can meet me there, I'm already walking", you said as you drove out of the shop and headed home. It was an inoffensive lie but you kept telling yourself it was for a greater good.
"Okay, I'll meet you there in twenty minutes or so", he said, "Je t'aime, mon amour".
Riccardo seemed to have parked the car at the front of your building, making you get the bag out of your car trunk and join him and his family, "hey guys! Thank you for coming to this", you smiled, touching Chiara's foot softly and getting a giggle out of the little girl.
"No worries, this is such a nice idea and we're happy to help!", Marta said, letting you walk up to the door so you could get to your apartment.
"For the first time in my life, I'm the first one somewhere, and then they showed up too!", Joris said as the rest of the group you invited stood up from the hallway floor.
"I'm sorry for making you wait, but I had to pick these up and then the call with Charles had to be done at the precise time so he wouldn't get here before I did!", you explained, unlocking the door and letting them in.
"So we're fine to wait, but Charles can't wait for you?", Joris teased, making kissing noises as you shook your head, "privileges of being my boyfriend - it is what it is!", you chuckled.
Delegating the small tasks you left for the last minute, Charles' text saying he had just parked the car was enough to capture you attention, "quick quick, go hide in the living room - careful with the board game boxes! He's coming up!", you ushered your friends to the living room before your boyfriend knocked on your door.
"Hello, my love", you said, kissing his lips and pulling him inside the supposedly quiet apartment.
"Hey, gorgeous girl - I missed you", he squeezed you tight once you closed the door, "I was getting in my he - what's that?", Charles asked as a noise came from the living room.
Chiara squealed loudly enough for him to hear, so in part your surprise was not such a surprise, "you're not alone?", he mused.
Lacing your hand in his, you pulled him to the living room as everyone jumped out of their places to greet him!
"Surprise - ish!", you waved your hands as if you were announcing some great show, "I gathered all your favourite people - Lorenzo is coming with Charlotte in a bit, he just picked her up from work and your mother also had a cliente so she'll arrive a little later. Arthur is in the bathroom?", you wondered as you saw him walk out and pat his brother's back, not missing the truly surprised look on his face as he pulled you closer to him, kissing your temple, "you're the best, amour, thank you", he whispered.
You had food laid out in the coffee table and drinks in the kitchen where everybody could serve themselves so you could have your dining table available for the board and card games you were playing along with some building blocks for Chiara who was immediately stolen from her parents once your boyfriend saw her.
"Do we want to make a castle? Or maybe a rollercoaster?", Charles mused with the little girl sitting on his lap, still keeping an eye on his Monopoly game to make sure no one was missing any of the payments on his properties, "Good job, chérie!", he congratulated her, kissing her chubby cheek.
"Do you want me to get you guys anything? I'm already going to the kitchen", you wondered, "can you fill this up for us, please?", Marta asked as she handed you the orange juice jug, "yes, of course!", you grabbed it.
"This was a great idea, Y/N", Lorenzo said whole he poured himself a drink as you stepped into the kitchen, "he's been in his head a lot recently", he began.
"It's not much, really, it was quite easy to put everything together and you being here was very kind", you brushed it off.
"Y/N, gathering his favourite people to do something he loves apart from racing may seem simple but it's what he needs right now - don't underestimate yourself or the ability you have to bring him back to a good mental space", he rubbed your shoulder before going back to open the door, "it's our mother", he excused himself.
You set the jug on the table and took Chiara from your boyfriend's arms, volunteering to change her nappy in your bedroom.
Charles hugged his mother tight, "Hello, mon petit", she cupped his face and kissed his cheek, "I'm not little anymore", Charles blushed, "you and your brothers will always be my little boys, I don't care how old or how tall you get", she smiled, greeting everyone else in the room.
His favourite people were all in the same place, Charles thought. Some were playing cards, some were just chatting and you just picked his friends' daughter to change her nappy like she was your own.
"Do you have room for one more? I'm usually pretty good at this!", Lorenzo said as he sat at the dining table, "you take my game - it's not too bad, just make sure Marta pays up what she owes me - two hotels in my blue cards", Charles raised his eyebrows, "I know you were counting on your daughter's cuteness to distract me, but I have excellent vision", he smirked.
Charles walked to your bedroom, seeing you close the diaper bag as Chiara kicked the air, layed on top of your comforter and giggling at the story you were telling her, "and then I had to tell the lady 'that won't do, because I have my boyfriend's family and our friends over for dinner and I can't have too little food! Even if I have left overs for weeks!' because that's what's right, right? She also had this very fluffy bread that was still warm from the oven so I asked her if she could add that because I knew you'd like it - bread is the best, isn't it, cutie?", you spoke.
You were it, he had known that for a long time.
You were the one he wanted to grow old with and go through every challenge life wanted to throw at you, because he knew you both could face them if you were there.
"And who is that spying on us, hm? It's Charles! Let's go and give Charles a big hug and many kisses!", you smiled, picking her up and approaching your boyfriend, cuddling into his chest as you kept the little girl on your arms, kissing his chest while Chiara palmed his face and giggled when Charles pretended to eat her fingers, "yummy fingers, nom, nom, nom".
"I need to get started on dinner - I'm doing that roast you really like", you offered, "I already prepped most of it, just need to cut up the veggies and then put in the oven, simple as that".
"C'mon, Chiara - I bet my mother is wondering where you are because she'll want a cuddle", Charles took her from your arms, "I'll be back for you", Charles slapped your butt playfully.
You were seasoning the food on the trays, making sure you weren't forgetting anything when your boyfriend walked up to join you, wrapping his arms around your waist, "thank you for this, I really needed it", he kissed under your ear, turning you around to face him and kissing your lips properly, "it's fine", you scoffed.
"No, I really needed it - it's easy to lose sight of these things and these moments", he began, "I was home and getting way too much into my own head and I wouldn't got to anyone unless they asked about it", he admitted, squeezing your body closer to his.
"I'm glad you liked it, it's truly nothing but I'm glad you're happy", you smiled, "I can't control what goes on your mind all the time but I'm going to make sure that whenever you're near me and say silly things about doubting yourself, I will always help you see the truth and work it out with you - no down talking about yourself when you're with me, understood?", you stated firmly almost like you were lecturing him.
"I know, amour", he giggled, kissing your forehead and then littering some more kisses on your face and making you break out in laughter loudly.
The dinner was great and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves as they ate the meal and spoke about whatever came to mind, summer plans already in discussion.
Charles was helping you put away the plates when he decided he would voice the thoughts running through his head. Usually at this time of the day he was already knee deep into strategies and failed attempts, but this time was different.
"I want this every day", Charles said with a big smile on his face.
"Well, not all of us have your schedule, it would be lovely, but maybe making it a weekly thing? Monthly maybe with your schedule?", you tried, not wanting to kick his idea straight to the trash.
"I don't mean that - I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I was wondering if you'd like to move in with me", Charles clarified, "there's no point to keep two places when realistically, we spend most times at eachother's place - you're down to what? Sleeping two nights here per week?", he noted as you smiled.
"You want to move in together?", you checked and he nodded, "yes, I do - honestly, I've thinking we keep my place since you're renting here and that way you'd be closer to work, too", he suggested.
"Sounds good to me", you smiled, kissing his lips, sealing the deal.
"I don't want to be far away from you when we don't have to be, and this way you can save on rent, too!", he added and before you truly lectured him, he caught you ahead, "I know you won't let me pay for things on my own and we will find some arrangement for that, I was just saying you won't have to keep paying your landlord", he smiled.
"I mean it when I say I want to split expenses, okay?", you argued, "unless you start going with expensive caviar or any of that crazy expensive stuff - my salary can't take that", you joked.
"When have you ever seen that in my fridge?", he threw his head back as he laughed.
"I'm only joking, handsome - I can't wait to move in with you", you hugged him, "I love you, Charles, can't wait to be your new roomie".
#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc fic#charles leclerc fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 fluff
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When ATEEZ members give you back hugs, reaction post! [hyung line ver.]
<3 Hongjoong
•Hongjoong had invited you to visit him in his new studio when you were free from work. It was getting pretty hard to spend time with your bf nowadays, and the only way you could be together was if you visited him in his studio while he was working. You took up on the offer because, why not? You would also get to see how his new studio looked like and you were excited.
•When you finally reached, hongjoong welcomed you warmly, showing you around his new studio proudly: the brand new gigantic sofa, the decorative lights, the new computer setup, everything looked amazing. You couldn't take your eyes off your surroundings, hongjoong had decorated it on quite a minimalist manner yet it looked stylish, you definitely felt that it was truly his style.
•Your breath almost hitched in your throat as two arms wrapped around your waist, slowly, as you examined a few paintings he hung at the top of the wall. "Looks good, doesn't it? Do you like it, babe?" He asked, his voice low. You placed your own palm above his arms wrapped around you, caressing it softly. "It looks amazing, joong. You're surely gonna love working here from now on." You said, a blush creeping up on your cheeks when he pulled you even closer to him.
"I missed you. It's sad that the only way we can spend time nowadays is when you visit me while I'm at work." He sounded frustrated. You felt disappointed about that too, ofcourse, but thats just how it was: your work timings and his were different so the only time when you truly got to spend time with him was during the weekends.
"I missed you too, love. Lets plan a short trip for this weekend, even if it's two days, we'll make the most of the time we have together." You tried your best to sound enthusiastic. Hongjoong always loved that about you, how you tried to be happy in front of him even though he knew you were disappointed sometimes.
"That sounds great. Now that you're here, let me order your favourite food, then we can plan the trip today itself." His arms left your waist, and his fingers naturally intertwined with yours, as he led you towards the couch. You both sat comfortably there, spending your precious time together to the fullest.
<3 Seonghwa
• You had a pretty bad day. Might just be the worst day of your life, nothing seemed to work out the way you wanted it to- you accidentally dropped your favourite mug and hot coffee spilled all over your brand new work outfit, you were late for the bus at the bus stop and you barely managed to get work and reply to mails at work, your senior had asked you to take over an absent employee's work but you couldn't get it done efficiently and got a lot of hearing from your boss regarding the same.
• Hence, here you were, sitting at the edge of your bed that you shared with your bf, your head buried in your knees as you quietly sobbed. Seonghwa was going to be home soon and you wanted to stop crying and try to be normal because you did not want to make him worry, he was going to be quite tired himself from practice. But you couldn't help it, you cried half of the time and half of the time you cursed yourself mentally.
• You almost started to get a migraine because of how much you had cried till now. You didn't even notice that Seonghwa came back home, calling out for you. At this point, you felt that you were about to have a bad anxiety attack.
"Y/N, you're already home?" He called out, searching for you and cautiously approached your shared bedroom, entering only once he noticed that the door was slightly open.
"Sweetheart? What are you doing here?" He asked, noticing your hunched shoulders, your back faced him as he entered. Without another word, he sat behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he pulled you closer to his chest. Seonghwa did not need to say anything else, he knew how you were when you were at your lowest and knew exactly what you wanted- physical affection. You immediately leaned into his embrace, your head resting against his shoulder.
"Breathe in, and out- yes, that's it. You're okay. Everything's okay, I'm here." Seonghwa hummed in satisfaction as your breathing was under control, and if he hadn't come now you would have already had a pretty bad anxiety attack. His hands moved on slow, comforting circles on your arms, his embrace truly was the most comforting thing in the world.
"I got pretty worried when I reached home and didn't see you in the living room. What happened, love?" He asked after a while.
"I- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you." You let out, slowly facing him as you felt better and calmed down. Seonghwa reached out for your face, his fingers gently wiping your tear stained cheeks. "Please, don't apologise for this. You know that I'm always here for you. Wanna talk about it?" You nodded, but before that Seonghwa quickly got up and bought you a glass of water, watching you with a soft smile at the corner of his lips as you slowly chugged the water down. "Good. Now tell me who i have to deal with, who made you cry like this?" He asked, sounding quite serious.
"It's nothing, hwa. I just happened to have the worst day ever, all because of my clumsiness." You let out with a huff, and Seonghwa placed a chaste kiss on your forehead. He listened to you rant about anything and everything, all night- your worst day had apparently become so much better because of Seonghwa.
<3 Yunho
• It was the weekend, you got up quite earlier than usual instead of staying in bed and sleeping longer. Your stomach grumbled violently, you remembered how you barely had dinner last night because you were trying intermittent fasting to loose some weight. As you thought about whipping up a breakfast that was healthy and could make you full as well, you slowly untangled yunho's arms around your shoulders, careful not to wake him up and headed towards the bathroom to brush first and then made your way towards the kitchen.
• The first light of dawn streamed towards the kitchen window, as you softly hummed to yourself while flipping some eggs and reached the cutting board to slice up a few avocados to add on top. All of a sudden, a pair of strong arms encircled your waist, making you flinch. "Geez, can you atleast give me a warning!!!" You let out, calming down instantly as you saw Yunho's adorable still-sleepy face and he backed down a little, rubbing his eyes. You chuckled, placed his arms around your waist once again and continued slicing up the avocados.
• "You seriously get scared by the smallest stuff, don't you?" He teased, now fully awake. "Not my fault that you hug me from behind out of nowhere. You know I flinch easily."
"Good morning to you too." He replied instead, placing his chin firmly on your shoulder, observing your every little move on the cutting board. You hummed, now reaching out for the whole wheat bread packet. Yunho's eyes landed on your neck, and he detached his chin from your shoulders, smirking to himself. A noticeable, reddish spot, a hickey- at the right side of your neck. "What are you doing?" You asked, as your eyes met his and you glanced down sideways, trying your best to see what exactly he was staring at and tracing that made him so smug. He now placed a kiss exactly at the spot where he gave you a hickey, admiring it.
•"You're insane, you know that? I'll have to cover that up with makeup now, I have work tomorrow..." You sighed, but at the same time you couldn't hide the blush that formed on your cheeks as you remembered what exactly had happened last night.
"I'll do it more often now. How about I suck at a spot right besides this one?" Yunho teased, as you swatted your arm playfully at his, he lightly stumbled behind. "That's what you get for being mean first thing in the morning." You pouted, but reached forward and placed a soft kiss on his cheek regardless when he flashed you his best innocent puppy face smile.
"Go brush and sit, I'll cook some eggs for you too." You said and he nodded, practically running towards the bathroom because apparently he was very hungry, too.
<3 Yeosang
• It was a day off for the both of you. Regardless, you had to get some work done from home because you had been procrastinating for the same. After having breakfast together, yeosang was sitting on the couch, gaming in your living room and you sat at the work desk in your room, carefully reviewing mails and getting such work done.
• You spent 2 hours consistently working, and although your chair was quite comfortable your shoulders started to ache badly. Right when you were groaning about your shoulder pain, Yeosang entered your room, passing you a gentle smile. He came up behind you, wrapping his arms all around your neck, and you giggled when his breath tickled your ears.
"You've been working since hours, y/nnie~ come on, it's time to have lunch." He said, staring at your laptop screen and you typed hurriedly, your stomach grumbling at the mention of lunch, you were quite hungry.
"Just a few minutes, then we can order something. Ah, my shoulder hurts, can you move behind a little?" You asked, and Yeosang immediately removed his hands from your neck, resting them gently on your shoulders instead.
"Sorry, I didn't realise. You want me to massage them? I'm sure you'll feel relieved if I do, I'm quite skilled." He added.
"Yes, please. Thank you in advance, yeo." You sighed in pleasure as he bagan to knead your shoulders with him thumbs, applying gentle pressure to the knots that had formed from hours of tension. His fingers worked expertly, finding the tight spots and easing the stiffness with slow, deliberate movements.
"Make sure to take breaks in between. You overwork yourself sometimes." He said, continuing to massage your shoulders skillfully. "I will, thank you. You're the best." You continued to work for a few minutes more as Yeosang sat on your bed, watching you. When your work was finally done, you got up, and Yeosang reached for you, giving you a quick kiss on the cheek. "Let's order something, I'm starving."
"How about we watch the drama you're currently watching, while having lunch?" You said, knowing how much Yeosang loved watching that drama. "That'd be perfect, let's go." He smiled, leading you towards the living room.
#ateez#ateez imagines#ateez x reader#ateez reactions#ateez fanfic#ateez ff#ateez fic#ateez fluff#ateez recs#ateez x y/n#ateez kpop#ateez hongjoong#ateez seonghwa#ateez yunho#ateez yeosang#yeosang#yunho#hongjoong#seonghwa#yeosang imagines#yunho imagines#hongjoong imagines#seonghwa imagines#kpop imagines#atzsource#atz fluff#atz x reader#atz#atz imagines#ateez x you
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two is better than one | joel & tommy miller
Summary | Frustrated that whatever you're trying to do still isn't working, you decide to give it one more try with Joel before cooling off for a while. Tommy is back to keep an eye on the both of you this time, but what happens when he starts to feel a little left out, watching his brother bring his girl over the edge more times than he cares to count?
Warnings | I swear I always start this the same way so here we go: Tommy getting cucked but also getting involved this time 👀, Joel being a fucking menace, dirty talk, oral sex (F&M receiving), face sitting, breeding kink, unprotected PiV sex, talk of infertility, no use of Y/N
Word Count | 3.8k
Authors Note | Whew. When I tell you this little threesome has been rotting my brain, I'm not lying. This is the only thing I can focus on, hence them being updated so fast! I just wanted to say a huge thank you to you all for the continued love you're giving this series - it honestly blows my mind every time that it's something you guys enjoy, that my writing reaches so many people and that they lap that shit up. I'm so grateful to everyone who has taken the time to comment, send me asks, reblogs and those who have slid into my DMs with all the love. I see you, I hear you, and I love you all - thank you. I hope you enjoy this next part just as much as the rest - it's a doozy. You know the drill, if you did like it, please consider reblogging, commenting or sending the love to my ask box, it's what keeps me going. And if you'd like to leave me a tip (of course no pressure!), then here's my Ko-Fi.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Another month and another fucking negative pregnancy test. You knew it was irrational, but you were starting to think that maybe you were also part of the problem now. You’d been doing everything right, following all the advice in the books you’d bought almost a year ago when Tommy and you had first started trying for a baby. You’d been exercising, eating as healthily as possible, tried to keep yourself a stress-free as possible. You’d been keeping a close eye on your cycle and still, nothing to show for it.
When you clambered down the stairs, test in hand and flung it in Tommy’s direction, he already knew. He could see the heavy set of your shoulders, the quiet sniffling of you trying to hide the fact you were crying. Tommy had settled you on the couch, covered you in a blanket and made you some tea. Then he’d made your favourite meal for dinner, even driven to the store and picked up Diet Coke, emptied a can into a glass filled with ice and lime juice like you loved, but none of it really helped to soothe how upset you were.
The TV was on low, and he had your head in his lap, slowly stroking the strands of your hair as you tried to calm yourself down. Remind yourself that even the most fertile of couples needed to try for months sometimes before they had their first baby. It was stupid to think you’d be any different.
“You’re thinkin’ way too loud, sugar.” Tommy muses, letting his hand run up and down your arm instead.
“Sorry,” You mumble, “Just thought it would be easier.”
“I know,” He coos, “We can take a break for a while, if you want.”
You turn so you’re led on your back, looking right up at him, “I just want a baby.” You feel a tear slip down your cheek to pool near your ear.
Tommy uses his thumb to brush away the tears that have started to fall, bobbing his leg up and down gently to try and soothe you, “It’s still fresh,” He speaks softly, “Let’s give it a couple of days and see what you want to do, okay?”
You nod in agreement, feeling the beginnings of a headache pooling behind your eyes. You push yourself up into a sitting position and turn around to press a soft kiss to his lips, “I’m gonna go to bed,” You announce, “Headache.”
He lets you go, it’s still early and you know there’s the game highlights he wanted to watch. In bed, you can do nothing but toss and turn for a few hours. Every time you’d try to close your eyes, all you could see was vision of you and Joel, in all the different positions he’d put you in so far, and all for what? When the bedside clock hit 10:30, you head out to use the bathroom. As you near the door at the top of the stairs you can hear Tommy talking to someone, through the phone because his is the only voice you can hear.
“I know, brother, she’s just really beat up about it,” You hear him say, “I don’t know how to make it better.”
You lean against the closed bathroom door, wondering if perhaps you should leave Tommy to talk to Joel. There’s a pause where you can hear Tommy humming along to whatever Joel is saying on the other end of the phone.
“I dunno man,” Tommy sighs, “You managed to knock Sarah’s mom up on a one-night stand, guess I thought it would be easier for you.”
There’s another pause, then he’s speaking again.
“No Joel, all of her tests came back perfect,” Another sigh, “I was always the problem.”
You’re about to push down the handle to go to the bathroom when Tommy speaks again, “I don’t know, maybe we should just cool it for a while, we’re all gonna work ourselves up otherwise.”
You decide you don’t really want to hear the rest of the conversation. You sit on the toilet and let your face drop to your hands in frustration. Why couldn’t you just be normal? Why couldn’t you have been a nice, normal couple, having a baby in the most natural way possible? Why did this have to come along and fucking complicate everything? And why did Joel have to be so fucking good to you every time?
You wash your hands under the tap, water as scalding as it could go, just in order to feel something that wasn’t frustration before you head to bed. There’s no longer the sound of voices as you pad back across the hall and get back into bed, shutting off the lights and curling onto one side, knees as close to your chest as you can manage to get them. It’s not long before you can hear Tommy shuffling around upstairs. He pushes open the bedroom door quietly, obviously thinking you’re already asleep. You can hear him undressing before he's slipping onto his side of the bed, pulling your body close to his under the covers as he spoons you.
You let your own arm cover his over your waist as you lean back into the comfort of his chest, letting his breath fan across the skin of your shoulder as he presses a kiss to your skin.
“I wanna try again,” You speak softly into the dark, feeling Tommy’s arm’s squeeze you tighter, “Once more and then we cool it for a while.”
“You sure?” He asks into your ear, lips pressing to the sensitive skin behind your ear.
“I’m sure.” You respond, turning around in his arms to capture his lips in yours.
When the time comes to try again, it’s you who greets Joel at the door when he knocks. Tommy already upstairs and situated in the chair he had taken the first time you’d done this as a three. Joel leans down, lips just millimeters from your own, but instead of kissing your mouth, he places a soft kiss to your cheek instead.
“Hello, darlin’.”
You step up onto your tiptoes to press your own kiss to his face, just shy of the corner of his mouth – the kisses from last time still a secret between the two of you.
“Evening handsome,” You smile, pulling away from him to close the door as he steps inside, “You ready?”
“To give you what you want?” He smirks, “Always, pretty girl.”
You feel that telltale heat flush across your cheeks as Joel pulls you into his side, hand dipping down to squeeze your ass over the fabric of the robe you’d thrown on moments ago. God, why did he have to be so fucking intoxicating around you?
You take hold of his hand in yours, leading him up the stairs behind you. Tommy was reading a book as you entered the room, folding the corner of the page before setting it down on the nightstand closest to the chair. You can’t help but snigger as you watch him and Joel give each other the typical male greeting of a curt nod of the head.
You drag Joel by the arm to the foot of the bed, pushing his shoulders down so he sits on the edge. Then you take a step back and tug on the belt of your robe, letting it fall open and off your body to leave you completely naked in front of him. You watch his face as he trails those beautiful brown eyes over your body, letting out a low whistle of approval.
“Beautiful as ever, darlin’,” He compliments, reaching out a hand for you to take, “But you’re worked up, ain’t ya? And not in the good way.”
Your eyes flit to Tommy in the corner of the room, who has that smug ‘I told you so’ look on his face. You’d been itching for Tommy to arrange this since that ovulation test said you were in the zone, but Joel had been working away for the past two days, and now you were worried that if you didn’t hurry the fuck up, you’d miss your chance.
Joel reaches out and puts his hands on the back of your thighs, pulling you into him, he’s looking up at you, pressing hot kisses to the skin of your tummy, “Gotta relax babygirl,” He moans, “I’m tryin’ my damned hardest, but you just gotta let nature take its course.”
“Just frustrating.” You mumble.
“I know baby, I know,” He’s got his hands palming your tits now, “Long as I need to, I’ll keep fillin’ you up, y’hear me?”
Your breath catches in your throat and all you can do is nod as he moves himself back on the bed.
Joel leans back on the bed, his head just shy of the pillows, “Sit on my face, pretty girl.”
You’re almost embarrassed at how quickly you scramble yourself onto the bed, moving up to straddle his hips – even Tommy is chuckling from his chair.
“Can’t get enough of Joel’s mouth on your pussy, can you, sugar?” He speaks in a low voice.
Joel has his hands on your ass, guiding your naked body to hover over his face before his hands are slipping up to your hips to pull your cunt to his mouth. He wastes no time in getting straight to business, wide tongue licking stripes from your entrance, where he laps up your slick like a cat would cream, to those deliciously tight flicks of the tip of his tongue to your clit. You can hear him groaning into your pussy, your hand coming down to anchor itself into his hair to hold him still as you start grinding against his face.
You can hear the obscene slurps that he’s making underneath you, it’s half the reason you think it takes you no time at all to reach the edge, because he fucking enjoys this just as much as you do, he loves tasting you, loves making you feel good and you can feel that, can feel it on his mouth.
As you throw your head back as Joel’s tongue swipes perfectly across your clit, you catch Tommy in the corner of the room. He’s palming himself through his jeans as he watches you, your body writhing as his brother’s mouth brings you closer and closer to the edge. It wouldn’t hurt, would it? You think, if you asked if he wanted you to help him out.
“You feeling left out baby?” You coo, reaching your hand out for Tommy to take, “Joel gets my pussy tonight,” You punctuate with a grind of your pussy down onto his mouth, “But I can help you, if you want.”
He’s standing at the edge of the bed in minutes, his hand pressing into the back of your neck, not unlike how he tries to work the knots from there when you watch TV together. It’s soft and it’s loving and a complete juxtaposition to the vice grip that Joel’s fingers currently have on your hips.
Your lips are impossibly close to Tommy’s, you could easily lean forward and kiss him, instead, you have a demand, “Take off your pants.”
Tommy’s hands start to undo the belt holding his jeans up, so you turn your attention back to Joel between your thighs. He is expertly holding you right on the edge, you’re mewling and whining as he tongue works you to the edge, and then pulls away, moving down to gather more of your slick on his tongue.
You drop your head and catch his eyes looking up at you, “You gonna tease me all night, Miller?” You ask, voice cracking as he makes a point to suckle on your clit, making you cry out, “Fuck, make me come, please Joel.”
All of a sudden, Tommy’s hand is on your face, pulling your mouth to his own in a searing kiss as he guides your hand to his cock. You’re moaning, a combination of the fact that any second, Joel’s mouth is going to have you screaming and the fact that it’s Tommy kissing you, his cock you’re currently pumping through your fist. It’s delicious and it’s filthy and it should feel all shades of wrong, but it fucking doesn’t.
You feel it in your legs first, the way they begin to shake and pulse and your thighs clamp around Joel’s face. Then you feel it in your abdomen, like a knot unfurling all at once as pleasure bursts over every inch of your skin. Your mouth detaching from Tommy’s, so you can cry out his brother’s name as you feel yourself almost collapse onto him.
“Such a good girl,” Tommy breathes into your ear, your hand still firmly held around his cock, “So good when you come for us like that.”
You feel Joel’s hands tapping at the cheeks of your ass, telling you to lift yourself off his face which you do, dragging yourself down enough so that you’re sat across his chest, not caring that your leaking pussy is dragging slick all over him. His face is covered, covered in you. He’s grinning up at you like the devil, tongue circling his mouth to clean your taste from wherever he can reach.
“I gotta be inside you, pretty girl.” You can hear his gruff voice speak.
Tommy immediately moves back from you so you can settle yourself down on the bed. You start on your back, but Joel moves you to lie on your side. He’s still fully clothed behind you, but when he presses himself up against you, you can feel his thick cock straining in his jeans.
“Take your clothes off.” Is all you can manage to whine as Tommy settles on his knees on the space in front of you, taking the back of your head in the palm of his hand to bring your mouth to his cock.
Joel shuffles away from you and you feel the mattress lighten as he gets off the bed to shed his clothes. You almost wish you could watch, there’s something about the way Joel reveals his body to you that drives you wild. The way he drags his shirt off to reveal his broad frame, chest peppered with hair, or the way his cock bounces when he finally pulls off his underwear. But right now, you’re focused on making your man feel good.
You’re making sure that you’re doing it exactly as Tommy likes, almost telling him through the ministrations of your mouth how grateful you are for him, for this being his idea, for loving you enough and trusting you enough to let someone else give you what he cannot. You’re giving all the attention of your tongue to the head of Tommy’s weeping cock, tasting the salt and musk of his pre-cum, using one had to pump the base of his cock.
You can feel Joel settle back behind you, pressing his entire body against your own, hard cock slipping through the slick folds of your cunt as he settles himself in the right position, then, he’s taking hold of your leg, hand in the crux of your knee to pull it up, baring his prize. He slowly inches his cock inside your tight heat and suddenly it’s all a little overwhelming.
You’re giving the love of your life the kind of head you’ve only ever seen in porn, Tommy taking most of the control to thrust in and out of your mouth. You’re pretty sure the tears falling from your eyes are a mixture of his length hitting the back of your throat and the overwhelming emotion, love, and admiration you feel for both the men who are crowding your body, owning it, taking what they both want, one of them hopefully leaving you with what you want.
You pull your face away from Tommy’s cock for a moment, still giving his length the attention it needs, but you let yourself lean into Joel behind you, his cock still moving languidly inside you. He’s got one of his arms snaked under your neck, your head leant against his arm like a pillow, his other hand holding your leg up so that every time his cock brushes inside you, it’s hitting that damn spot that makes you want to cry.
“Look at you, lucky girl,” Joel growls into your ear as his lifts your leg up higher, pushing it almost to lie flat aagainst your side, “One cock in that pretty little pussy, another in your mouth,” You let a moan, muffled by the fact that Tommy is currently doing a slap-up job of fucking your throat, “He’s a lucky man,” Joel speaks again, “Bet that mouth feels divine.”
“You ask nicely, she might oblige you, brother.”
You feel him puff air through his nose in a chuckle, “I’m quite happy right where I am,” He speaks, pumping his cock so deep inside you that you actually think you can see stars, “You’re a lucky son-of-a-bitch gettin’ this for the rest of your life.”
“She’s special, I’ll give you that.”
It’s like you have to prove him right now. You can feel the walls of your pussy clenching around Joel as he picks up his pace. You can feel his balls slapping into your skin with every thrust, the power behind them causing your mouth to take Tommy cock deeper into your mouth every time.
“Sugar, I ain’t gonna last much longer.” You hear him speak from above you.
You pull off him, again letting your hand work him as you look up at his through your lashes, “You want me to swallow for you, baby?” You asked, wondering what you must look like when he looks down at you, fucked out from his brother, begging for him to come down your throat.
“There’s an offer I cannot refuse,” Tommy grins, letting your mouth take him back inside the warmth, “Such a good girl.”
He only lasts a few more seconds, cum hitting your tongue and seeping down your throat. You swallow down every drop, grinning up at Tommy. He leans down and plants a kiss to your lips, and now your focus is on Joel, thick and solid, pumping his cock in and out of you.
“You focus on Joel now, sugar,” He croons, “I’m gonna sit back and watch you have fun.”
As soon as Tommy has moved away from you, Joel is pulling his cock from your pussy, turning you onto your back before he’s crowding his frame over you, settling between your thighs. You’re pliant and you move easily when he hooks your legs over his shoulders, folding you back as he slips his cock back inside you.
You’re gripping his arms as he fucks into you in earnest now, tip of his cock bruising your cervix with every thrust, you know he’ll have half-moon shaped marks on his arms come the morning, they’ll match the bruises he always leaves on your hips, the shape of his fingertips indented into your skin.
“God fuckin’ damnit,” Joel groan, head falling to the column of your throat to graze teeth and lips over your delicate skin, “Gonna come so deep in this fuckin’ pussy it won’t have a choice but to take, you hear me, pretty girl?”
“Fuck!” You exclaim, as he shifts just enough to change the angle that his cock is spearing into you, “Joel please.”
“Please what?” He teases, “What do you want, babygirl?”
“Inside,” You breath out, “Want you inside.”
“Yeah, want me to make you a mama?” You can feel tears pooling in your eyes, “No need to cry, pretty girl,” He leans down, folding you in half even more, almost uncomfortable, to kiss away the tears, “Gonna give you what you need.”
He thankfully moves back a little, stopping your bones from screaming at you for being folded so inhumanely, then his thumb is on your clit, “Only gonna make you a mama if you come with me,” Joel smirks, “Deal?”
“Oh god – fuck – whatever you want,” You cry, “Please, give me what I want.”
His thumb is relentless on your already sensitive clit, those tight circles have you clenching around him and when you look into his eyes you know he’s just as close as you are, “That’s it baby, you keep those big, beautiful eyes on me,” Joel’s hips are snapping into your with a force you didn’t know you could feel, it’s entirely too much and entirely too little all at the same time, “Can feel that tight little pussy suckin’ me in,” You cry out as his thumb falters and drags across your clit in a way that has that not threatening to unfurl yet again, “It’s alright baby, if you come, I’ll follow, yeah?”
That’s exactly what happens. His thumb traces wet circles over your clit and you do exactly as he says. You keep your eyes wide open, staring directly into his own, as your mouth falls open with a screech as your vision clouds. Whatever happens, Joel is right behind you, his cock pounds into at most, twice more, before he’s growling your name through his teeth, cum painting every inch of your pussy. He drops your legs from his shoulders, and falls forward, letting his head rest in the crook of your neck as you both fight to catch your breath.
You wrap your arms around him but it’s all too soon before he’s pulling himself out of you, a kiss to your cheek as he does so. You’re spent and you’re aching and if you’re honest, a little overwhelmed. Joel dresses quickly, and you wish you could ask him to stay, wish he didn’t feel the need to run away, but you know it’s for the best. Tommy tells you he’ll see him out and come to bed, so you roll over and pull yourself under the sheets, trying to warm yourself from the cool air that’s spattering across the sweat of your skin.
Tommy is back within minutes having seen Joel off. He shed his clothes and moves right up behind you, gathering you into his arms. He takes some time to press kisses into your neck and across your shoulders and for some reason, it sets your belly on fire. How have you been fucked so thoroughly by another man, this man’s own brother, and now you’re aching for this man behind you.
“I love you so much, Tommy,” You whisper into the dark, clutching at his arms wrapped around you, “So fucking much.”
“I love you too baby,” He whispers into your ear, stilling your hips as they grind back into him, “Enough of that, I’ll give you what you want tomorrow.”
#Joel Miller#Joel Miller Smut#Joel Miller Fic#Joel Miller fanfic#Joel Miller fanfiction#Joel Miller x you#Joel Miller x reader#Joel Miller x female reader#Joel Miller x f!reader#Tommy Miller#Tommy Miller smut#Tommy Miller fic#Tommy Miller fanfic#Tommy Miller fanfiction#Tommy Miller x you#Tommy Miller x reader#Tommy Miller x female reader#Tommy Miller x f!reader#The Last Of Us#The Last Of Us hbo#tlou#tlou hbo#tlou smut#tlou fic#the last of us fic#the last of us smut#trial & error#Joel Miller Pedro Pascal#Pedro Pascal
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Okay, yeah, I genuinely think that we will once again go back to this time period after the season 5 finale and before season 6
There are too many crucial things the special either left out or even contradicts with information we get in the last scenes of season 5 which takes place right before the new school year, whereas the special is right BEFORE the summer break. In France that break is 3 months, but even if it's not that real life number, then its was still the summer break and we obviously still need answers to unanswered questions.
Let's start with the most obvious thing:
1. How did Cerise get the Butterfly
We didn't see when or how Cerise got the Butterfly Miraculous and what on EARTH she did in the Agreste Mansion if she supposedly didn't watch the last battle and therefore SOMEHOW still doesn't know who Ladybug is.
Say "it's bad writing" all you want, but not explaining that AT ALL is a new level of neglectful. They didnt had to have her be there for almost the entire end battle. And SOME explanation is due to HOW she got the Butterfly.
Especially because
2. We never saw Marinette looking for it
At the end of season 5 Marinette explains that she turned into Aquabug and looked for the Butterfly, but couldn't find it.
I know its easy now to just say "Marinette is lying through her teeth", but this is something where it makes no sense for it to be a lie. A moment like this HAD to have happened, and I think it was hinted at in the special:
I think THIS is where her searching as Aquabug must have taken place, too, and it's why she afterwards runs crying to Nathalie.
It must have because right afterwards Marinette holds the press conference where she already states that the Butterfly is lost. AND Marinette at no point in the special is shocked or confused about the Butterfly being gone. We never get the moment of Marinette realising she forgot to look for the Butterfly and then her not finding it.
The special just smoothly transitions into her already knowing it's gone and not being surprised when it's already somehow in a villain's hand.
Combine this with us not having seen what Cerise did in the Mansion and how she even got the Butterfly, then yeah, I'm fully convinced that we'll be coming back to this, even if it's maybe gonna be in season 7 bc the show is frustrating like that.
Then of course:
3. Cerise's wish
We never got an explanation what her wish was. We know it was fundamentally changing the course of this time-line, threatening to end this one and creating a new one, but that doesnt mean you can just write it off as "Cerise wanted to nuke reality"
Cause Alix explicitly says that its not THAT dramatic. This wasn't Chat Blanc who almost wiped out all of reality. So Cerise's wish must have been something big, but not reality-shattering.
I would even go so far and say that the point of her using the wish was for the story to already get through with that for her character right away because she won't be after the wish in the show proper the way Gabriel was. That she had to realize that she cant just use the shortcut, because she's supposed to put her head into it and try to accomplish her goal herself. That this is what changed history, her using a shortcut. So her plan from here onwards will show us what she wished for.
---
As of right now, I would even make the argument that Gabriel's wish actually caused Cerise to loose her memory and this was her attempt at getting it back hence why she freaked out the way she did in the end.
Cause remember, she has known for ALL OF SEASON 5 that Gabriel was Monarque. Him being dead should not be the disqualifying factor here. She already KNOWS that. And it makes no sense that she didnt find out who Ladybug is in the Mansion.
So what I've already speculated for a year now is that Gabriel's vague wording of his wish will be the deciding factor here.
Because Gimmie is an individual, too, like all the Kwamis. The all-mighty personification of Reality and yet they're not allowed to actually be part of reality besides for the wish-granting (which Gimmie COMPLAINT about) and even there in their eyes people are asking for a mere grain of sand of the vast potential of Gimmie's power:
Meaning in short: I'm pretty sure we're dealing with genie logic now and Gimmie (aka God, I guess) used Gabriel's AMATEUR mistake of wishing something in the vaguest way possible (Gabriel, you fucking MORON!) and used the massive wiggle room to flex their power a bit and change reality into what they think is fun and interesting to watch play out.
Cause that's what Genie logic is. A genie doesnt fuck people over for no reason. A genie is an ancient and all-mighty being that's locked away, can't use its magic freely, and is dependent on the puny, young, and stupid humans who cant ever see the forest for the trees. Of course they grow bitter and deceitful to be able to live out any individuality and freedom in their awful prison.
Plus, I also find it the fitting route for the show to go that in the end we have to understand and help the abused Kwamis and powerful, but enslaved entities of nature, too. Gimmie is not wrong for being pissed and bitter about their awful prison, we just need to find a better way so Gimmie doesnt do shit like that anymore because of their exclusion in the reality THEY PERSONIFY
4. We never saw Marinette give Adrien back his amok rings
This even contradicts information we got at the end of season 5:
Adrien EXPLICITLY says that when Ladybug gave him his rings, she that this and that. But we SEE her saying it to him but not giving him his rings. So this doesn't check out. Adrien getting his rings is one of the most important moments too that just like the other ones was just skipped past with not so pretty implications.
Not to beat a dead horse, but people are really underplaying the head-fuckery Marinette is doing to Adrien with her STATED INTENTION of changing his memory to something better she decides for him, and especially when this isn't the first time she did this.
Sorry to break it to you guys, but it was already established in "Pretention" that Marinette's go-to solution is telling Adrien lies to make him believe his abuse isn't real and Gabriel is better then he is:
The scene has both Marinette and Adrien acknowledge that Gabriel is being controlling and doesn't allow Adrien his free time anymore so he can't see Marinette anymore. But once Adrien is sad about not being able to stop his father, Marinette does a 180 claiming that his father totally changed and allows him all the freedom he needs. Which he objectively DOESNT and she just pointed that out, too.
This is not some out of character thing Marinette is only now tragically being "abused" into doing by a dead Gabriel. She already did this before. This is nothing new. Its now just taken to a new level.
Combine this with Marinette being the second biggest liar in Miraculous (check out Flightfoot's post about it for more details) and how much she's for example still burring and isolating Chat Noir in lies and secrets so she doesn't feel uncomfortable in what she continues doing to him, even in the special when she just leaves him to believe his absence caused the death of an innocent man who's son is now an orphan
People are really too willing to keep ignoring or downplaying that lying, secret keeping and twisting the truth to her needs has already long become Marinette's default way of doing things.
No, she isn't ill-intentioned, but what Marinette does is incredibly harmful. You dont HAVE to be ill-intentioned to be able to genuinely hurt a person in a way that crosses the line. This is one of Miraculous' worst messages yet through Marinette herself. Saying "I meant well" automatically means the damage doesn't get to count because you felt bad for having done the bad thing so it actually getting to be BAD would be "mean" to YOU.
You can be toxic and hurting someone without meaning to or being "evil". That's why victims end up stuck in such relationships, it's because the person harming them is a 3 dimensional individual. And right now Marinette is pretty much borderlining doing just that and has shown the same tendencies long before the finale and special. This isn't new and was already harmful back then.
And PLEASE stop getting hung up on word definitions. You sound just like an abuse apologist who talks their or a friend's way out of accountability by a damn technicality bc you dont wanna face that you or a person you like can do a genuinely bad thing with no way around it. That it's not just some vague theoretical OTHER person who can do it, but a person in your life.
Now this of course doesn't mean that Marinette is an irredeemable monster (I literally just said that she's a 3 dimensional individual and not il'intentioned) but here is to hope that these ugly sides of Marinette will FINALLY be held to proper standards, so we can finally move past them.
Cause the way this end scene now reads is that after 3 months of summer break Adrien has started to seriously suppress his memories of the finale the way Marinette did in "Derision" because of all the insane trauma and loss he experienced. If Marinette suppressing her memories in "Derision" is valid, I dont wanna hear shit that what Adrien was put through "wasnt bad enough to warrent it". He lost his home bc his father send him away as punishment (yes, sending your child away means the child doesnt get to be in their home. DUH), he was seperated from his girlfriend and friends for what was supposed to at least a year, he had no idea if he would see Nathalie again because of her worsening sickness, his father was sick too, he has no choice whatsoever in his future, and he had nightmares of nuking the world blasted in his brain while being locked and watched in a white cell to be forced into submitting to control.
If Marinette suppressing her memory because she was bullied by Chloe is valid, then dont you dare imply that this isnt. By the end of the summer Adrien's memories could easily have been like a pile of playdoo and Marinette is out here spinning a web of lies that gives her validation in having done the "right" thing because he takes it and smiles.
By all mean, Cerise has all the dirt on Gabriel ever since "Revelation" and now the finale too. Let's just hope that the situation at hand will be taken care of properly instead of insisting that the situation doesnt exist at all. Cause that's not helping anyone.
Marinette's IS an opportunistic comfort liar and maybe if people would stop acting like that makes you a 1 dimensional demon we could actually acknowledge how realistic it is for Marinette to have continued changing how Adrien remembers things here so he's "happier" and Marinette herself can keep telling herself the same lies until she believes it too. Because Marinette does that a lot. It doesn't make her evil, but this is what happens when a person only gets free passes and isn't actually asked to work on themselves:
They get worse and so are the consequences of their actions on other people. Just like it should be with anybody else, it takes A LOT to actually cross the point of no return, but you cant just say "I'm a complex human being, so it can never be me". Cause that's actually the quickest way for you to end up acting in a way that no one should have to forgive you for. No matter the good intentions.
I've come to accept the solid likelihood that now Marinette and Cerise have switched roles in their established dynamic. Now Cerise is going to try and out the liar and Marinette will continue lying to cover herself.
Cause you also have to remember that Marinette just left the new villain with every other information in the notebook. She just took out her name, that's it. It is now unfortunately very likely that we'll get the dynamic from Ladybug and Chrysalis (if that's still her name) that Cerise will publicly try and reveal Ladybug's lies but Marinette will just assumes that this person can reveal the truth however she likes and Marinette as Ladybug will just claim something else everytime because she knows that most people will blindly believe Ladybug as authority and greatest hero ever.
Dont act like this hasnt been consistently built up for the last two seasons now of how Marinette uses her position of power. This is not out of nowhere and even the special only goes further in that direction with that "Only Ladybug will hold the truth and decide for the world what it is" speech.
You do you, but I will not ignore what I'm seeing. I'll instead try and figure out how there can be a happy ending despite of this being the direction of the show.
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Shoyo’s feelings towards Tobio are so ridiculously apparent that it takes less than 10 seconds within a convo with the guy to conclude that yeah he’s so not casual about his rival
‘oKaY so in other words’ sugawara clocked that IMMEDIATELY I’m laughing
It’s interesting to me that when kindaichi asked hinata why he was being so desperate at training camp, his response was “well I’ve decided that Kageyama is my goal, I have to beat him OR ELSE I’LL BASICALLY DIE”
He was there bc he needed to get stronger and learn how to develop more useful skills so he can stand on his own. He doesn’t want to fall behind when all of his peers, not just at karasuno but everyone all around him is improving.
He could have said something similarly to that but instead in his response, he emphasized solely on his rivalry with kgym as his biggest form of motivation.
Another noteworthy comment is after their fight in s2 when Hinata was practicing alone once again, focusing on improving himself :
It’s basic rivals dynamic but the way shoyo strictly base his own progress and growth upon his ability to measure up to and surpass his greatest rival…
The way he’s so determined to keep up with kgym, and whenever he speaks about him, it feels like he’s doing it all (as in working so hard) partially to avoid being left behind by him in particular.
Another fitting example is how during their fight, Shoyo was filled with frustration abt wanting to grow. However, when he was with Yachi, that wasn’t the ground breaking issue. He couldn’t help but confess, be vulnerable about his relationship with Kageyama. He ended up crying on his bike on the way home, all bc he didn’t want to lose the rivalry and partnership they had built over these past weeks.
I can’t explain this better it’s just interesting to me that the underlying focus is always on being able to stand by kageyama’s side as an equal, it’s like having a tunnel vision, using Tobio as a focal point.
reminds me of when saeko said “if shoyo hadn’t ever seen you on tv that day, he never would’ve chosen to bike over a mountain to go to karasuno, and he never would’ve met tobio” SHE GETS IT
On his bike here once again just to meet Kageyama at the gym later that day. unknowingly, coincidentally chasing after/towards Kageyama. Everything about them is so meant to be
Each time the infamous 'if I'm not alone' quote is mentioned Tobio is always the first one to appear by Shoyo's side.
and there it is again, the bike imagery. Climbing a mountain while talking about feeling ‘alone.’ It’s dark, it’s a quiet, kind of a gloomy scenery, and then next clip suddenly you hear Kageyama’s voice ‘let’s go hinata’ and everything lights up. That’s his version of ‘I’m here.’
It’s very much established that hinata’s goals does not revolve solely around Kageyama. He has other rivals, other strong players he wants to beat. He wants to be strong for his own sake too, but his biggest motivation and inspiration remains Kageyama, hence why he’s the final boss.
All of these imo is best displayed through the imagery of hinata looking at Kageyama’s back, tirelessly chasing after him on his bike
finding Kageyama in his path in Brazil, seeing him on tv, a direct parallel to his first encounter with the little giant which is so underrated
“won’t be outdone” pls learn how to be normal….
>ᴗ<
If you were to ask me my favorite kagehina moment ever it would most likely be ‘I win this time too' simply bc of how unique it is and how It’s a testament to how deeply shoyo values their promise.
Hinata's world crumbling down, he desperately wants to stay on the court and no else one could comfort him with those words. No one could get him to stop crying and recompose himself almost instantly like Tobio did!
he knows hinata best, he knows EXACTLY what to say to get through to him. This time he wins but there will be a next time.
and if you heard the voice act by the VA, shoyo sounds so broken and to have Kageyama put every negative thought in his mind on hold and makes him think clearer for a moment there... It’s peak kghn.
I love how before the fated match, Furudate brought back all of Kageyama’s ‘controversial’ quotes to show that everything has been leading up to this moment while also reminding us that those words have served as huge motivations for Hinata, guiding him on his path and keeping him striving for more.
“Eating, sleeping, learning. Everything he did to live was just one long run-up towards that day. The promised day was still far, far away, but it would definitely arrive”
#frdt is so meticulous with the bike imagery#I wanted to capture that#and how important their promise is#hinata shouyou#kagehina#kageyama tobio#Hinata’s unconventional way of longing#haikyuu
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Okay, this is going to sound insane, but please hear me out.
In the 19th century, there were doctors who specialised in curing "female hysteria", which was often just misdiagnosed sexual frustration (Whenever women were too out of control for men to handle, it was diagnosed as hysteria. So it was basically anything, sexual frustration included...). The cure was fingering...yeah. It was relatively normalised to, as a doctor, finger someone's wife...quite a way to make a living. There was basically a handbook written in Latin about how you do it (oil up your hand, insert here, there will be muscle contraction, the lady in question will breathe heavily before ultimately having a hysteria paroxysm (this is a former medical term for orgasms btw)). Obviously, there were mixed opinions about giving another man's wife an orgasm, however, the Catholic doctors concluded that it cannot have been sexual, since there was no penetration. "It's our duty as doctors to cure these poor women of their hysteria, Sir 🫡"
FUN FACT: Since some doctors would experience wrist pain from the...hard manual labour, they invented a device that does it for them: The vibrator. When the vibrator was first used in pornography, the doctors said NOPE and left their profession behind. In 2011, there was a period romcom made about this called Hysteria. It's not even that bad, unironically. Oh and by the way, the name hysteria is derived from the Greek word hystera, meaning uterus, hence why only women were diagnosed with hysteria.
Anyway, getting to my point:
Imagine a yandere thinking that you're being incredibly hysterical, emotional, out of control and then proceeding to sit you down and curing you of your hysteria the old-fashioned way...
They either do it knowingly, or are just too oblivious to even realise that what they are doing is...not quite the correct solution for the problems they caused you in the first place...
Just wanted to share this with someone...take it as you will...
,,, to be honest, I knew about the hysteria, but I didn't know about the fact that a vibrator was created that way,,,, sexy big brain<3333 i love your words so much, mercury kissed you at birth,,,, very brainy, very many cerebral convolutions, I love it,,, come here to kith kith pretty pie—
𝐁𝐈𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄
your husband is so sweet, so adorable — especially when he's on his knees in front of you, purring something about how he should help you, as if it's not his personal fault that you feel like this.
... ♡ unhealthy relationship, misconception of the century / time, hierarchical society, mild sexism? (more classism?), mild maledom elements, mention of religion, forced marriage implied, male pregnancy mentioned because no pregnant reader, unethical treatment methods?; doctor!noble!husband x darling!reader
dubious consent (dubcon) -> consensual sex, crying, mild sadism/masochism, mention of degradation (g.), hair pulling (g.), oral sex (r.), mild fingering (r.), praise (r.)
If THEODORE had been told that he was "mistreating his darling spouse", he would have
agreed.
It was logical: if he treated you well, then would you enter into a frenzy of emotions, scream and look as if you were about to faint before falling at a table made of pleasantly smelling wood, — Theodore knew that you love this variety; almost all tables, chairs and other wooden utensils was of this sort, — completely exhausted, unable even to drive away your narrow-minded husband, only waving a fragile palm in his direction, as if desperate, while he took your fan, straight from the hands of the best chinese craftsmen, and gently fanned you, letting you hang head? Of course not.
You, his breathtaking spouse, were so touching and gentle, full of spring charm and a few drops of exquisite, expensive coquetry, like the first flowers in spring — delicate, almost transparent, not at all like the luxury of scarlet roses that gardeners grow every season, or the exuberant scent of lilac and juniper, especially in July. Not at all. Your charm was subtle, unique, corresponding to the rumbling of the first rivers or the first drop falling from the roofs after the melting of the snow. You have never been a socialite — never; parents were rich enough to support you and your siblings, but not rich enough to live in idleness and not worry about money.
You were introduced at the first ball and attended others from time to time, but most of the time you couldn't afford to walk around with "old dresses", not wanting to be considered poor or shame family by not being able to buy new clothes. Theodore understood perfectly well — being from a not-so-rich family, somehow coping with this whole world, you simply could not afford to live bohemian, expensive and shameless out of fear that money was too little, as if you did not even think that you could just marry someone rich and sponsor with their help your family. Theodore didn't blame, having heard about you for the first time from the mouths of other dandies who follow every new "coquette fan", more than an eloquent sign of finding a partner, though; "too conscientious and didn't understand how this world works" or just a prude,
but now, he understands that you just knew your worth and waited for someone like
him.
After all, in a world where divorce can only happen after death, and infidelity is punished by an enraged spouse with a knife, how could you easily marry someone? You were so alluring, like ripe peaches filled with juice — naturally, not everyone can and should touch your delicate, perfumed hands and caress skin so soft that no overseas silk can compare.
Theodore was sure that there were words about you: "If the cost of their kiss was hell, // then I will kiss their lips, // so that in hell I can brag to the devils // that I was in heaven without even entering it." Because you were paradise, it didn't matter if you smiled, cried or screamed — or were "not a couple who deserved," but only because you could have become the monarch's spouse right away, but he found you earlier.
He had no doubt that you were special — definitely to him. Therefore, he did not think long before he came to your parents to take you to his estate, in the sweetly itchy haste of first and only love, kissing your hands and touching the slightly trembling fan with thin fingers while you looked down in frightened amazement, while your parents confusedly exchanged glances, not understanding why he came to "court you". Theodore did not ask if you had someone — after all, if you had, you would rather slit your throat than let another touch your thin fingers, because he would have done exactly the same in your place if he were still a dependent young man (now, of course, he was not — having studied at a very prestigious university, where his parents also studied, he was more than an enviable independent bachelor and knew it). And if earlier he was afraid that, what if!, was not "normal", then when saw you, he knew that he had been waiting for you all this time — and you were undoubtedly waiting for him too.
If, in order to be with you, he had to refuse the sky, the sun and the moon, he would do it without hesitation. This is love — Theodore had no doubt that you yourself understand this.
Your parents, however, soon dispelled his prejudices. You didn't just "didn't understand it" — you weren't like that, but Theodore, hesitating only for a few seconds, realized that you just weren't like everyone else. While others were blinded by love, like him, you couldn't be like that — you just didn't understand it, didn't feel like that, and your parents were only afraid that your "defect" in the marriage market would make you lonely for the rest of days.
Theodore, however, did not think so: you were the same age as him, he was childless, unmarried, rich and educated, had an estate with intelligent and trained servants, good sources of income, a lot of free time, did not have the habit of drinking a lot of alcohol or tobacco, — and the fact that you were allegedly "not sensual enough" was, of course, stupidity. He wasn't going to use the fact that you can't pick up a knife to kill an unfaithful spouse! And I wasn't going to cheat! He won't do any harm! Yes, you may be a little... very very little defective-ish, but isn't love blind? He will accept you at any cost, even with such a... 'setback'.
... Of course, it is wrong and even abnormal that you cannot kill someone who is cheating on you, and are not ready to die just to be with someone you love, and that it is wild for you to give up everything for your beloved... But Theodore understands that you are already too perfect, and it's okay to have flaws. He's not thirteen anymore.
As long as this is not passed on to children, everything will be fine, please, don't worry, ma joie, — he gently whispers to you, touching gloved fingers, stroking fingers gently, looking into your very happy face ? — I'll accept you for who you are, even with this. With everything. Because you and I, being whole by ourselves, become more than just "ourselves" together.
And it was true, don't get him wrong! His pedigree was good, he was, uh, "thoroughbred," and his family tree was beautiful, worthy of your hand. Theodore was not self-confident, but he was confident, buying everything you want, not walking through salons and entertainment houses and not being in any dubious circles, his entourage was only intelligent people who had an education and could both write and read, and not in two languages, and there was no one in his circle someone of the same gender, and he wasn't squeamish or suspicious. After all, what else can you worry about? But you were worried. Over time, it's even a little noisy.
You shouted, sometimes threw yourself, behaved strangely, as if he was not a refined learned man who was your shadow and wrote poetry to you, not forcing you to do anything even after your approved marriage, but a brute or an invader. Did he take you away without permission? Perhaps using his status in society to a little and influence your parents with children who have not yet appeared to the beau monde, and used a little influence to convince these people that he will help your siblings in the future to find a better match than they can now count on — but then why does he need it: status, influence, reputation, — if he can't even convince his love to stay with him? Otherwise, you can't blame—
... Oh wait.
You can.
Theodore realizes with annoyance, sitting hs office with a book in hands, writing notes in diary, and adjusts his glasses: he had completely forgotten — you're "not like that." You're different. Your parents told him. You understand love differently, you look at your partner differently, you cannot understand the concept of love itself... Theodore used to think that they just raised you wrong, but now he understands what they meant: that the feelings that ordinary people spend on a partner, you leave inside, letting them accumulate, and when you realize that you can no longer, you emotionally explode and behave as if something is wrong with him or you — it's obvious! You just can't do it any other way! Of course, why else would you be unhappy with your situation? After all, it's natural that your family hardly communicates with you or that you can't spend a lot of time outside the house — everyone lives like that, except the unmarried! You just don't understand it!
Because you are so emotional, so sensitive, so responsive, that, naturally, you need special care and care, and not a sidelong glance from your husband, who behaved so coldly, only supporting, but not helping you in any way! After all, he studied at the best university, was one of the best students, even had an internship and, of course, corresponded with his comrades, learning new ways to deal with diseases and disorders. After all, what kind of "good husband" is he if he can't even help his gentle, easily excitable spouse cope with their, he's not afraid of that word, illness?
You just don't understand...
“... Darling, we need to make one thing.”
You are gentle, soft, not submissive — both in clothes and under them, and although you may consider him a little pathetic when he whispers it to you, burying cold nose in your thigh like a lost dog, but after shouting and throwing things, you are no longer so full of destructive energy. Holding him tightly by the hair, you look down with pursed lips, but do not answer anything — and in expensive clothes, with jewelry, sleek and clearly not deprived of the love and affection of a bohemian husband, you look like a deity that descended from heaven.
Theodore knows that he must decontaminate for sure, but what can a spouse hide from a spouse, right? After all, you are more than a "single whole", especially when he is sitting on his lap, no problem as long as you are sitting on a chair made of your favorite wood, soft and comfortable enough, allowing him to carefully get rid of excess clothes without disgrace, looking at how thin lips touch your skin in a respectfully pious way.
Even your heavy breathing from the outburst of emotions sounds like music that should be played in the church if they want the heavenly ambassadors to descend.
Is he too "sugary"?
No, he's just a realist.
“Darling, please...”
You don't push away even when fingers gently touch your thighs like feathers, just frowning a little harder. But not by pushing it away. You are smart, you always have been, and, of course, you yourself understand that you are sick, and only he, as your husband and doctor, can help you. It's natural. Why do you need another men- or women- another doctor? How dare someone else touch you? Only you can touch him and only he can touch you. He's yours — a husband, a doctor, anyone. As soon as you become healthier, he will definitely be your lover — and maybe one day you will take a child or will he carry it. After all, how dare he sleep with you and use you, so gentle and airy, like a messenger from heaven, while you are so deeply ill, not even really knowing what love is and how to react to it?
“Darling... It's just a little help. Just say the word and we'll stop anytime. I don't want to harm my spouse, you know... Besides, you can always stop me by force.”
You yourself spread your warm, soft, almost plush thighs while he meekly looks up from the bottom, trying to unobtrusively encourage you to let him just look a little. Theodore was not an expert on issues related to sex life or the influence of genitals on human behavior, — although, undoubtedly!, it was important, but he preferred less dirty things, — but now, kneeling in front of you on a soft carpet, stroking your skin, it did not seem something vile or dirty, animal, but for some reason pleasant and... airy-natural; the very sight made him want not to wince and turn away, but not to look away, even when you pull his hair harder, frowning, clearly not too willing to continue this, but it's better than if he drags you to someone else.
You knew yourself that your husband sometimes got too involved with the human body in a not too, uh, "harmless" sense, but it was never dangerous or illegal, unless against the law of god, so you let him correspond with 'friends' and 'colleagues', studying new diseases and learning more about experience and practice. But if you knew that one day you would be the subject of research, you would definitely throw his ink and letters into the fireplace — along with other things.
“Mi único... I want to help... Do you know what hysteria is? This is when a darling behaves very much... emotionally because of the internal tension. And so we have recently come up with a... new way to deal with similar diseases. It can help our marriage... Te quaeso?”
Theodore is not an idiot; rather, he feels like a trainer or a tamer, gently pushing and touching, without making any sudden movements while you look at him, gradually relaxing the tense body, letting his fingers, slightly slippery from oil and disinfectants, touch the delicate skin of the inner thigh, massaging and stroking, not hurrying. He doesn't have much experience — practically none, you never shared a bed even after the "wedding night", — but there is enough theory and ideas how to use it, especially when thin, slightly cool fingers slowly touch the skin under stomach, stroke as lightly as possible along a sensitive line, kissing with warmed lips the skin. If he could, he'd love to just open his mouth and eat you, or at least nibble — but he's not the type who eats his darling and then walks around saddened widowers and widows without the opportunity to remarry, he's a more sophisticated type and definitely not that creepy, even if the way you are you pull his hair as fingers gently circle around, rubbing and stroking, using precum for better contact, makes his eyes water and his mouth open slightly, breathing, feeling too ambiguous even for a "husband", let alone the role of the "doctor" in which he was.
“Please... d-darling...” He chirps something slightly hoarsely, stroking, caressing, breathing every other time, as if you are holding not by the hair, but by the throat; when his fingers tremble slightly, you hiss, making him blush slightly shamefacedly, as if from your swearing, — but he tries not to break the rhythm, ignoring, as befits a refined well-mannered husband. Do well-mannered husbands use their fingers on their spouses? Theodore doesn't have that much experience to respond, especially when you flinch slightly, curling your toes, — and he wants to bite just to remove this strange shameful, almost perverted feeling of a mixture of lust and guilt inside, clearly not too approved by religion, but when you start breathing shallowly and harder, closing your eyes, Theodore moves his fingers faster, watching your face.
Is that right? You don't hold him so tightly, but don't take your hand away, and his fingers are so slippery and wet that he's almost ashamed, as if it's all his juices, and he definitely should at least look away, but this is scientific curiosity, just curiosity, even when he changes his position, sinking lower shamelessly, feeling himself for a moment, it really was some kind of fallen man from entertainment houses, with an implicit gurgling feeling in the lower abdomen, listening only to your breathing and slightly squelching sounds. Theodore hardly breathes, looking at his fingers, trying for a moment to distract himself with the fleeting thought "good that cut nails" — but when your... your bare foot touches his shoulder, it seems so perversely seeing your calves that he does not know where to look — freezing for a moment, his eyes are drawn only to you, even if it looks so... sweetly vulgar, completely wrong, — but you're already married, so it's okay even if you're not like that, right? It's okay when he sees something below your neck and bare arms, it's okay when you squeeze his hair tightly again, it's okay when he hears your hot, loud breathing, as if you're breathing directly into his red ears, although he can't even look up from the way you're holding him.
Your fingers are strong, dexterous, squeezing his strands so hard that he can't move anywhere, but for some reason he is too pleased with this than he should be, even when Theodore feels like you are pushing him even closer shamelessly, as if he is not your, actually, noble and high-minded husband, who is now plays the role of your doctor, helping you with your "hysteria", but some kind of fun boy!
Outrageous!
“D-darl-!~”
You hiss something, almost growl — and pull too hard, forcing Theodore to briefly let out a distant sigh without resistance — and obediently open his mouth, hastily removing his fingers so as not to interfere before he finds a new, more comfortable place. His eyes are slightly watering from the mild pain, but when he does not see a shadow of the old irritation or anger in your face, he obediently sticks out the tip of his red tongue, not trying to shirk his doctoral duties — or is this already a marital duty? Theodore doesn't know, he's not sure, — especially when you hold him even tighter, not listening to what he says, knowing that if he really was "against it", he would have already got out, and not looked at you like a fawn at a hunter, as if it wasn't because of him that you were here, with legs spread apart and heavy breathing from the heaviness in the lower abdomen.
Is this really what he was taught at university?
A boy for fun.
The corners of your husband's eyes turn red, but he does not try to say anything or justify himself, — why should he? — making inarticulate sounds, but only moving his head, hesitantly holding your hips as much as he could do it respectfully and unobtrusively; after all, he is a learned man, even if he was kneeling like some kind of animal or a slave.
When Theodore awkwardly, clumsily moves his tongue, trying to make sure that you feel good, for some reason the world feels much brighter and sharper, — especially when the heat gets stronger, making you tremble slightly, feeling a wide tongue and thin flexible fingers, as if they are perfect only for this, but there is less air in your lungs than you need to continue dirty deservedly whisper to him how low he has sunk, from his 'writing letters to the best doctors he studied with' to kneeling in front of his spouse.
It's not that you're going to stop him or let him change his position, of course, but just force him to continue doing what he's good for, while he's almost meowing, almost purring, not trying to pull away anymore.
... It's not that he's wrong, though.
You definitely feel better after a little therapy.
#.spicy♡#ৎ୭ — little puddings#🍮.yandere#🍮.maledom#🍮.unethical#🍮.hierarchical society#🍮.dubcon#🍮.fingering#🍮.degradation#🍮.rough#🍮.praise#gender neutral reader#yandere x reader#cw yandere#dom reader#?#implied#🍮.s/m#cw dark content#ৎ୭ — work
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tate langdon x gn! reader.
trigger warnings : really sad thoughts going through the readers mind. i let my drama queen take over and everything came out too dramatic.
angst/ fluff at the end if you squint your eyes really hard.
this is so messy, really, it’s just a drabble i wanted to put out but i think i’ll probs end up deleting it since i feel like it’s cringey. also, english is not my first language so whatever (and wherever) mistake you might find, please bear with me.
I know it might be confusing, or even worse, not make sense at all. but i just let my messy thoughts flow and that’s the result.
just to get things a bit more clear, tate is still alive and dealing with his situation back home while reader is the only friend he managed to make in high school. the reader was at the house, not the murder house ( let’s just assume the reader’s house it’s near that ) and tate just presented himself there after the reader became distant with him.
« I’m sorry. »
You know about those days, when you wake up and your eyes reflexively land on the window? And then they wander up, and get to notice the soft hue of the blue sky, lightened up by the sun? And it’s almost as if you could feel the warmth of the sun rays seeping through your window?
Perhaps it’s the warmth of the covers, the cozy feeling that you get every time when you just wake up and that later on makes you whine because you know you’ll have to leave that warm place soon to get up and get ready for school. But it’s almost as if you had a restart.
For five minutes— sometimes even less, it depends on how much it takes your brain to process the world outside of your mind again— you get to feel like you’ve just been reborn, and that everything would be alright.
But then it all comes crumbling down.
Your brain registers where you are, the reality you live, and the obnoxious routine you have to do everyday. Get up. Brush your teeth and hair. Skip breakfast because you’re always late. Get dressed. Go to school. Wish to get home during and in between classes. Get finally home, but then you get frustrated because it’s always the same damn thing.
You don’t know what it is that frustrates you, that angers you so much and sometimes even makes you cry. That drains you, leaving you so exhausted that you end up falling asleep only to wake up the next morning and experience the same thing again.
Perhaps, you think, that you’re crazy. Maybe you’re spiralling out of reality. Maybe you’re just being an ungrateful teenager. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
Maybe you just want to sleep forever.
But, when you think you can’t take it no more, here comes Tate.
Sometimes you think he’s weird. Not in a bad way, you think he’s just.. weird. He’s one of the most pessimistic people you know, always looking down on the human specie and labelling it as some sort of stupid being. Yet, when it comes to the state you’re slowly falling in, he seems to suck it out of you.
You don’t know how to explain it properly— you don’t even understand it yourself, but it’s almost as if he is a sponge. Just by staying near you, he sucks all the darkness away. He’s like a black hole, but instead of absorbing everything he just absorbs your darkness. Or perhaps he’s just a little hypocrite that doesn’t allow you to be pessimistic just like he is.
Even though you know.. you know that referring to Tate as pessimistic is the least you could call him.
You hate it when he gets clingy, and that happens very often. Who are you kidding? it always happens, hence why you always resort to unkind ways to get him to leave you. You just want to be alone sometimes.
Tate might argue with you and say that it’s more than sometimes, it’s always.
You’re not a good person, you know that. You’re selfish and you don’t care who you’re hurting when it comes to you and the decisions you make.
You didn’t care when you started hanging out with a boy and spent less and less time with Tate. Why did you do it though? You still question yourself.
Yeah, he might be clingy, attached to your hip, dependant on you and the list could go on just like that. But he was the only one that showed you how much you mean, or perhaps, how much you could mean to somebody.
You never thought it possible that a being could be so much for another being.
Tate is your only friend. Even though you’re not sure of that anymore since all you did for the past few weeks—maybe month, was avoiding and ignoring him.
At the beginning it was just to get a little time alone. But then it started becoming more of an avoidance, and now? You thought you were avoiding him out of shame.
But he was your only friend, and you pushed him away for what? To test if you could feel something different than the void you were currently drowning in? How could you have been that selfish?
His eyes seem to be asking you the same questions as he stares deep down inside your soul. His kaleidoscope honeyed eyes.
« I’ll.. » a sob breaks his voice, and his attempt to hold back his tears fails, making the tears break through and fall down his cheeks like diamonds, «.. I’ll leave never bother you again if that’s what you want »
For the first time in weeks you feel something so authentically powerful that it almost knocks the breath out of your lungs.
You’re sat there, on your messy, still unmade, bed as you’re looking into his eyes. And he stares back at you almost as if he has already been there, in that position— unwanted and thrown to the side, times and times before. But still it causes him pain.
It’s a subtle but yet stinging feeling. Like a cut being slit open again by a sharp dagger with its blade covered in salt. It’s a swift movement, a methodical cut, because it always seems to be hurting in the same spot.
You don’t say anything.
« You’re just like her. » Constance. Tears stream down his face like pouring rain. His voice taking the resemblance of a wave as sometimes it gets higher and other times it comes crashing down, stopping abruptly to let his tears fall down silently.
Just like rain in the ocean.
Silence fills the room yet again.
« Please.. p-please.. » How come that he’s the one begging you and not the other way around? What is he pleading for?
You frown looking at him, still staring into his eyes like a stone cold bitch. And you might’ve even been one to someone else’s eyes. But not to his.
You were just as hurt and lost as he was.
He got down on his knees, sliding on them on the carpeted floor until he was by your legs, as you were still sitting down on your bed. He sobbed and sniffled as he got in between your legs and let his head slowly come down to rest on your lap. «..d-don’t leave me.
you’re the only thing I have left.. y-you don’t have to do anything just.. p-please.. please I need you. You’re everything to me.. I-I’m.. I.. »
How could you have let everything spin out of control?
You were sorry.
You were so sorry.
Your vision became so blurry, almost as if a plastic wall was swiftly building itself up on your eyes, until it broke down and you felt warm droplets of water strike your cheeks. You were sorry as you could see the hurting boy sobbing on your lap because of your selfish behaviour.
You didn’t know what had happened to you to get you to this point, to hurt mindlessly like that the only person that cared about you. But you knew you were sorry and you wanted to wipe everything you did away.
Your hand, slowly, made its way on his head covered by the soft honeyed hair. You let your fingers slip and comb through the strands of his hair while you finally felt something.
« I’m sorry. » a broken whisper left your mouth.
just wanted to apologize again as i’m sure it came out more cringy than anything, but if you have some advice to give me please feel free to leave a comment ( or just straight up tell me to stop writing and never do it again 🤪 ).
#ao3#tate langdon#tate and violet#tate langdon x reader#tate langdon x y/n#tate langdon x you#american horror story#kai anderson#kai anderson x reader#kai anderson x y/n#kai anderson x you#kyle spencer#kyle spencer x reader#kyle spencer x y/n#kyle spencer x you#kit walker#evan peters#evan peters x reader#evan peters x you#evan peters x y/n#evan peters x female reader
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need dilf!patrick to make me pick my punishment. would i rather he neglects my mouth and just jerks off against my face? or fuck my face like its a pussy, until im gagging and crying on it? sike he's gonna do whatever i dont pick, otherwise its not a real punishment 😵💫
-🐞
and dilf!patrick loves when you're on your knees. you love it too. blinking up at him with doe eyes, biting your lip and almost looking cross-eyed at patrick's throbbing cock because it's so big and heavy, threatening to leak on your face but you don't mind.
you made patrick really, really mad. he knows you're young and pretty but you didn't have to flirt so hard with the fucking waiter at dinner. leaning forward and pushing your tits together as you pointed at the menu. asked, "what do you like here?"
patrick could practically see the boy's knees buckling, the saliva pooling under his tongue as he ogled you.
so here you are, on your knees and patrick isn't letting you lay a fucking finger on him. he picks that punishment for you. knows how whiny and desperate you get. and patrick's cock is so, so close. his thumb pushes your bottom lip open and spit falls from the corners of your mouth as you look up at him.
"pathetic little slut."
and he slaps you. he knows you love that part--hence the name. slut.
he presses his erection against your lips, strokes himself over your face, rubs the pre-cum into your mouth until you're rocking back on your heel for any friction on your neglected pussy.
he won't let you cum. after he paints your face in white, he pulls you up by your hair. kisses your forehead. has you take a shower with him just to get you even more riled up, the water running down your face acting like bonafide tears--he's so fucking frustrating.
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With or without you
He continues to run through my mind even after months of the tragedy that occurred at the iron mine.
Two bodies were found.
Richy had his funeral long before i could get to Duskwood. Jake was simply taken as a criminal to the rest, a mistake that had been erased from the equation by the same fire. Of course he didn't have a funeral, but Lilly called asking me to come to Duskwood, that somehow i accompany her to say goodbye to him.
Honestly, i never would have expected that call. The others were acting a little strange around me after Richy's death, i didn't blame them. Hence when Lilly called i was more than surprised.
It had been a long and tiring trip, but I wasn't tired enough to stay at the hotel, so i just got to know Duskwood a little on my own, remembering when Jessy showed it to me through photos and videos.
I passed before through the cemetery. I couldn't be at Richy's funeral and i honestly don't know if i would have preferred to be there, not after everything that happened. My family had kept me away from funerals since i was a child and i preferred not to attend, it had become a custom that many did not like.
The resentment i felt for him prevented tears from coming as soon as i saw his grave with flowers that the group of friends surely brought here frequently.
I sat on the grass, looking at the engraving of his name in stone, and i was transported back to the first day of all this, when Thomas put me in that group. I had never stopped suspecting any of them, the affection was there, it was real, but my father had trained me well.
I didn't lie to Jake when i told him that my father was a famous detective, i knew he wouldn't believe that i meant it.
I had torn a couple of grasses out of the ground in fury until i realized what i was doing.
—Bastard —was the only thing i muttered to the grave. Everything around me had fallen silent, as if he were listening to me.
I left the bouquet of purple hyacinths next to the other flowers, feeling a slight stab of pain deep in my chest before getting up and leaving the spirit of the mechanic behind.
Richy. The boring and friendly mechanic. A nice boy who had a difficult life. Very good friend. No one would have suspected him if his plan had gone perfectly, maybe not. Just maybe.
I walked a couple of blocks when i felt how thirsty i was, just one word to Richy had cost me enough energy to want to drink something at the Rainbow coffee.
Two bodies. The flames swallowed them.
I frowned and pinched the bridge of my nose, sighing in frustration at the sudden thought. I regretted having agreed to come, i certainly wasn't prepared for this, not as i had thinked.
Duskwood was strange, those who resided here were even stranger. This was a place destined for tragedy.
At that time, the news came to me later. The numbers had simply disappeared from my cell phone, as if they had never existed. The memory of the anguish i felt in my throat is present again now.
Jessy got my number after a while from Thomas, who really seemed to keep remembering my number. She told me everything. She didn't cry at first, but it didn't take long.
She asked me for explanations, she wanted to know what Richy had told me and then Jessy asked if i had suspected him.
I think it affected her that i didn't tell her about my suspicions at the time.
I crane my head back in the cafeteria chair and start to get up to go pay, wanting to get rid of all the flashbacks, but when i look up from the coffee i had finished almost thirty minutes ago, i was met with the gaze of a man at the other table.
"I know you"
A shiver runs down my spine, i only hold my gaze for a few seconds before looking away and heading to the cashier to pay for my coffee, feeling the urge to get away from there and go find Lilly for once.
The man is no longer at the table when i go to the door, i think about the idea that he could have left while i was paying, but then i find him just a few steps away from me which causes me a micro heart attack. He's looking at me again and i seems to see him sneaking a smile when he sees me getting scared.
Another reason to say that Duskwood was strange.
The man heads to the door before me and opens it, i wait for him to leave, but then he looks back at me as he holds the door in his hand. He remains serious and as soon as i get close i start observing him. He has a backpack hanging from one shoulder and a black jacket, his black hair covering his eyes a little, and the eyes... I seem to think that his eyes are gray from the distance i'm at, but when i'm almost next to him i notice that they are green.
He doesn't take his gaze off me. He tilts his head slightly to the side, as if i'm causing him some curiosity.
I have the feeling that i know who he is, but maybe it's fear that takes over me, that prevents me from holding his hand, his face, his lips on mine.
You know who he is. You know.
I think i see a slight smile at the corner of his lips, no, i don't think so, it is. He smiles. There's a barely noticeable amused glow in his irises. Does he know what i think?
The voice continues screaming inside me, as if i recognized him from a long time ago in my existence.
I may have chosen to ignore reality at that moment, maybe i just couldn't face him at that moment.
Everything happens in a second, i just press my lips slightly, without smiling, it's almost a smile but it's not quite there. I thank him and walk out the door.
I know somehow that i will see him again. He wouldn't have shown up today if he didn't know what i was about to do with Lilly, if he didn't know that i was going to say goodbye to him today with her.
In the few seconds that i looked into his eyes, he had conveyed everything to me. The silent request, the last favor, and deep down, the warmth of his love.
Maybe Jake believed he had found me first, but i would never have let someone follow me for too long if i had considered him a danger.
Here's Jake's version of this story -> Do i know you?
Note: Happy new year to everyone. I apologize if the events of this one shot are too fast, I had very little time and I somehow wanted to have it finished by today. Plus I'm still not too comfortable with making a long story :(
Without further ado, I give you the best wishes♡
#duskwood#duskwood jake#duskwood game#everbyte studios#jake duskwood#duskwood mc#everbyte duskwood#everbyte game#duskwood everbyte#duskwood jake x mc#duskwood mc x jake#jake donfort#duskwood x moonvale#moonvale everbyte#Spotify
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PLARGOS HEADCANONS!! (Sense I got some requests)
- Mr plant is mute and has always had trouble communicating, but Argos helped to teach him sign language and now he can communicate answers to questions or responses with it.
- Argos gets sick very easily and Mr plant makes him tomato soup every time
- Mr plant knows how to play piano, but can get very frustrated if he messes up
- Argos likes to knit sweaters for his neighbors and Mr plant. Mr plant acts like it isn’t a big deal but keeps all of the sweaters he gets in his closet neatly hung up
- Argos can have a little bit of OCD sometimes
- Mr plant likes to sit in the rain and get completely soaked. This is how he drinks water as well so it really helps him. It also calms him down after an “outburst”
- Argos can choose what eye/eyes to see out of on his body whenever he pleases (more on that in a separate post)
- Mr plant loves black coffee, Argos hates coffee but adores jazmine, peppermint, and hibiscus tea
- When on camping trips with Argos’s Boy Scout group, Mr plant does shadow puppets with them (but sighs the whole time)
- Argos dreams of owning a greenhouse one day and is currently saving up (hence why so many jobs)
- Argos frequently borrows Mr plants sweater/shirt thingy and they have movie nights every Friday
- they almost always end up watching Gemini home entertainment or the Mandela catalogue and Argos will almost always cry tears of joy “look at the beauty of this scene mr plant…the screaming gets me every time🥹”
Lemme know if I should do a part 2!!
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Dog breed hcs for the boys:
Both boys are mutts. Lots of mixing and mingling to create ideal dogs. Gives them lots of problems, but they're still lovable in the end.
Bond is a Great Pyrenees, Maremma Sheepdog, Kuvasz, and Clumber Spaniel mix. He's a massive dog with a thick double coat. He's surprisingly lazy for his blend but enjoys having work. He's clumsy, too, but that's for comedic purposes. A major issue for him is the tiny apartment. He's big and a guard dog mostly. He needs lots of space and things to protect. When they go to the park, he always ends up herding the kids or other dogs. He also loves herding Anya and forcing her to bed. He sometimes herds Loid if he stays up too late. He really does enjoy walks with Yor because she normally goes to large open spaces where he can run around. Sometimes, they bump into farms, and he starts herding the livestock. Since her epilepsy diagnosis, Bond has been extra attentive to Anya frequently guarding her, pulling her away from crowds, etc. He can also tell when she's about to have a seizure so he can alert Loid or Yor. He struggles a bit with self grooming and requires a lot of help in that field. Yor can spend up to an hour just brushing him. He also eats a lot of food and is prone to obesity so Loid has him on a strict diet. He has very powerful bark and can get very noisy when he's excited. He's massive, almost as tall as Yor when upright and weighs more Fiona (in her defense, she is tiny). Only Yor can easily pick him up, Anya can not even hold a paw. Loid genuinely think Bond would crush her by accident, so he's very weary about leaving the two alone. But in the end, he's a cuddle bug and likes to act like a lap dog much to everyone but Yor's frustration.
Aaron is a German Shepherd and Belgian Malinois mix (a few other breeds in there since he is also mutt). He's very smart, strong, and energetic. Surprisingly, the lazy Handler is actually very good at managing this beast. He's very well trained and even teaches himself a few additional tricks. He loves working and hates staying indoors all day, hence why Handler has to bring him to work or he'll destroy (actually clean) her apartment. Aaron is actually very young, between a year or two, so he's still extra energetic, breed aside. Handler actually loves having such a demanding dog. She used to train a lot of spies, but now she doesn't get the chance as often, so it's stimulating for her. Like I mentioned before, Aaron has taught himself a few additional tricks. He actually monitors Handler's blood sugar to make sure she's eating enough. First, he'll alert her, but if she ignores him, he'll bring her a snack. He also does this to other agents, so if Aaron starts approaching you, it's a clear sign you need to eat (or you're a rat). He can also tell when Fiona is coming and would leave to avoid setting off her allergies. Although he is very intelligent and skilled, he has anxiety from his time as a bomb dog so he can get a bit of stage fright and doesn't like being left alone or he'll start crying because he is still just a baby. He also can't handle fireworks and loud noises. Even gun shots scare him. He has to take anxiety meds and lots of time resting.
Bonus: Nightfall's cats
She has two Siberian Forest cats. One is like 100, weighs 25 pounds (not fat just objectively huge). He's about half the weight of Anya for context. Thick triple layer coat and barely sheds that fucker. The other one is a white kitten (say 6 months to a year), she's partially deaf. The older is extremely well trained, loves to play fetch and enjoys chasing people. Actually very close with Aaron who's always trying to play with him. He loves taking long walks and actually uses a leash. In other words, he's a cat that acts like a dog. People love it and are obsessed with him, but much like his owner, he's reserved and avoids people. The kitten is full of life and energy but still in the process of being trained. Strict ass Aaron always gives her a lesson in behaving (yes, Aaron can train cats. Just another hobby of his).
She has a third one, but it's a Sphynx and spends most of its days in the house cuddling everyone and everything.
#spy x family#sxf#loid forger#twilight#anya forger#yor forger#fiona frost#handler#nightfall#sylvia sherwood#aaron sherwood#bond forger#headcanon#i might break these paragraphs up later idk bulky#i am a huge advocate for the forgers buying a farm#no reason to have such a massive dog in an apartment#free bond from the schackles of urban living#aaron can handle it just means more work for him
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Just some thoughts
I'll try to get back to writing too, even though it seems tumblr ate at least one of the asks I got, though it wasn't a request. This is maybe kinda me venting again for the first time in a while. It's not really anything super-duper serious, and I'm mostly just annoyed about a hundred little things. I just love complaining on the internet lol...
If you don't want to read the rant/vent/whatever part, don't read past this
So I was at my mom's for two weeks and came back home like a week ago. The first week I was there, I was alone, since I was house/pet sitting while my mom, her husband, my two youngest siblings +some other relatives went to a cabin in the north. I didn't want to go, hence I was recruited to watch the house and cats. We had a little evening of card and board games with my two younger (but of age) brothers and my best friend, some alcohol was involved and we had in general a good time. I was also having a good time, but afterwards my BFF kept asking me if I was okay and if I was having fun. Since I drank quite a lot, I wasn't masking as much, so even though I was having a good time, there was apparently a bit of a resting bitch face situation going on with me, and by "a bit" I mean I looked like I wanted to strangle someone the whole night. Also I only slept like maybe 7 hours the previous night, which was way too little for me, so that also contributed to me being "annoyed".
It felt kinda bad that when I unmasked, even if unintentionally, it was immediately perceived as negative. It's not like this is the first time this has happened, I was always the weird kid and the whole "resting bitch face" thing has always gotten me a lot of complaints. I mask so much when I'm around other people, even family and my BFF, and when I unmask a bit or stim a little more obviously I get comments like "What are you doing?" or "Why are you acting weird?" Then I go back to trying to mask absolutely everything again and to not show any "weird behavior". It's really frustrating tbh.
Anyway, when my mom and the rest came back from the cabin, I had cleaned most of the downstairs, which is a huge fucking job because of how much stuff they have, they're all kind of hoarders. They came back in the middle of the night and when I came downstairs in the morning the kitchen had already basically exploded, and I was pretty pissed, because wtf? I kinda hoped they would be able to keep it tidy for like more than half an hour, but I apparently that was a stupid thing to expect.
My little sister had a hobbyhorse day camp thing the next week, and her best friend was also at my mom's almost the whole week. I don't like my little sister's BFF, she makes my sister act out and be stupid in general, and the friend is super entitled. Anyway, I was really stressed by Wednesday and I had a bit of a meltdown and went to cry outside while my mom was putting my youngest brother to sleep and my sister and her friend went upstairs. I was sobbing and scratching and hitting myself, because I was really fucking upset and overwhelmed. I didn't tell my mom about this, because she's stressed enough already, and I don't want to add to it.
I feel like my mom is basically a single mom most of the time, because her husband is away so much, be it because of work or because he goes to Germany for two weeks to fucking car shows. While my mom has to manage two kids alone, take my youngest brother to his summer club and my sister and her friend to their camp. It might not sound like that much, but there's a lot more I don't feel like explaining. My youngest brother is autistic and has ADHD and my mom has ADHD too, so he alone is a lot for my mom to manage. I was there for most of the time while my mom's husband was away, so she was really grateful for that. When July starts, her husband leaves for another leisure trip, and my mom has to work and figure something out for my youngest siblings, because the summer club thing ended, and they're too young to be left alone at home. My little sister can manage alone while my mom works, but I feel like she really shouldn't have to, but my sister and youngest brother CANNOT be left alone together for more than like an hour. (My youngest brother is 7 and my sister is almost 10.)
My mom can manage, but it's hard, and she doesn't get to take trips like that EVER. It's not that her husband doesn't let her, but he's very good at the whole "weaponized incompetence" thing, and I feel like my mom just feels better when she knows there's someone who's actually taking care of the kids. If she goes somewhere it's always a family trip or max one night for her alone. I feel bad for her and I try to help, but I can't really handle the kids and the mess well, so I can't be there all or even most of the time.
Again, I'm doing okay, just pretty tired. Thanks if you read, I appreaciate it :D
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Is there a particular season that your classification AU takes place in?
This was brought on by me thinking of the baby and Chuuya playing in the snow. Dazai's horrid attempts at building a snowman and Chuuya trying to not giggle at his baby being frustrated. (Can you imagine how much of a hassle it'd be for Chuuya to get Dazai all bundled up for the cold. GAHHHH HE'D LOOK SO CUTE IN A LIL PUFFER COAT 😭. Do you think Chuuya bought him a sea/crab themed hat, scarf, and gloves? I can just see him with one of those hats where you press the flaps and the ears move except his is a crab so the claws move.)
And then whenever Dazai gets too cold Chuuya immediately having them coming inside and drinking hot cocoa and then bundling together under a blanket while watching a movie.
This made me think of them doing other types of snow activities together now 😭. Sledding together and Dazai's so scared at first and practically sobbing, Chuuya's debating on whether he wants to continue or not, and when they get to the bottom of the hill you wouldn't believe the boy was close to tears a second ago with the way he's laughing and begging to go again.
(I live in an area where we get a lot of snow in the winter so hence the excitement.)
Snow makes me so excited because i grew up a map’s inch away from the equator and the first time i saw snow i was on a road trip with friends and i was like PULL THE FUCK OVER and i played in the snow at a rest stop 😭 it was great
Yokohama in my opinion is like animal crossing and it has all seasons 😭😭😭😭😭 yes to snow yes to snow. I don’t have official times when things are set but I was thinking fall-ish for part 5 because it’s raining a lot and just generally gloomy out. I want chuuya to do a bunch of things in all the seasons so I’m sure we will eventually get there 😭
YES to it being a hassle to get Dazai bundled up, he’d do okay first layer, but by the second layer he’d probably already start getting hot because you know chuuya keeps that house heated. Getting the baby’s socks on is almost impossible because he won’t stop kicking, and chuuya only gets them because Dazai is distracted tearing off his sweater. Chuuya has to shove that back on too, and dazai’s flushed and crying as chuuya puts the jacket, scarf, and hat on (i think chuuya would have the foresight to dress the baby in a baby top with attached mittens, because he knows Dazai would try to ditch those first thing), chuuya forgoes the shoes for now, and just carries Dazai outside to let him adjust to the temperature. Chuuya has to wiggle the baby’s shoes on outside, and Dazai starts to calm down once he realizes it’s super cold out and Chuuya isn’t trying to boil him like a crab 🤧
I love love love Dazai being too scared to do things like slides or sledding down hills 🫠🥹🩵 little things like that just kill me 😭🤧 chuuya would have to drag Dazai back inside to warm back up, the baby would still want to play even though he can’t stop shivering 😭 and Dazai’s immune system is awful, and it’s also flu season, so there will undoubtedly be times where the baby is sick, but it’s snowing and chuuya has to keep him inside even though he wants to go sledding again 🩵🩵🤧
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this is me reminding you bc is shinso also a pro BC IMAGINEEEEE
No because he's already spinning around in my microwave brain like a frozen lasagna and YES HE ABSOLUTELY IS A PRO!!! Showing up at your house all raggedly looking at 6am to get your daughter when he said he'd be able to pick her up before 5pm the damn night previous.
He knows you're not... seriously mad at him when you answer the door with a glare, but you're definitely peeved at his usual excuse of "something came up, the commission ended up needing me all night."
"Yeah, well," is what you want to say, "your daughter with insomnia needed you, too."
Except before you can scald him with the words, the little girl is waddling outside from behind you still in her nighty and straight into his arms, and it truly is hard to be mad at him when he scoops her right up into his arms (have they gotten beefier?) and apologizes to her with a kiss.
(And then you have to invite him in for breakfast because it was already on the stove, and then you have to wait with him because she needs to repack her bag, and then he's standing there awkwardly in your living room, his old place, like he's not currently staying in an almost-dumpster of an apartment, save for your daughter's little room, AND HE'S RUBBING THE BACK OF HIS NECK AND TRYING NOT TO LOOK YOU IN THE EYE because it's not only a reminder of what he lost but also you'll be able to tell, you can always tell, that he hasn't really been sleeping much because... he constantly feels like he needs to justify the fact that he chose work over you and his little girl and, and, and, and then she's finally appearing with her plastic backpack ready to go and he can't bring himself to properly say goodbye as he leaves as if to pretend he'll be back soon, good riddance!!!!!)
But that's how it always goes between you, and hurts even worse because neither of you are sure if your three year old actually knows (realizes?) that you aren't together anymore. I mean, his hours as a hero were weird even when she was first born and things were still good, so it's not like this is unusual to her.
(Shinso anticipates losing himself when she finally starts noticing that you only kiss her goodbye, when she starts registering who isn't home, when she starts asking questions about it, and when the answers finally start to make her cry.)
...
He relates to the notion. The thought of losing his family makes him want to cry, too... hence why he lets you make the majority of the decisions about her well-being and tries to stay out of your way (he figures you might need him again if she inherits his quirk)...
(You'd never know it, at least... he hopes, but he does appreciate his job for allowing him to take his frustrations out on the underground criminals he's tasked with catching, but. That's for another time).
...even if the whole thing hurts him more than he could ever begin to say.
#shinso#SORRY IF THIS ISN'T SMEXY IT'S SMEXY TO ME#AT LEAST THE BEGINNING#I WANTED TO DESCRIBE LOOKS TOO BUT IT WAS HARD#ANYWAY AHHHHHHHHHHH#you know his daughter is the embodiment of a princess in all ways and forms#doll face curly hair braids ribbons dresses frilly socks big doe eyes loves animals....#i adore her :(((#and him... in his cargos and boots and t shirt he threw on just for the drive over#and his apartment would be a MESS if he didnt have her#not bc he's messy but bc bachelor lifestyle isnt for him now he's had you#and he's MISERABLE#when he's not cooking for daughter he's eating saltines and pb for dinner and falling alseep at the kitchen table#so f*cking funny when it works out finally and he's falling asleep on the carpet of your daughters room trying to play with her#and you nearly step on his#finally relaxed shinso is a sleepy dad#always napping#i CRY#caitie things#gen#kids tw
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