#and it makes me v sad bc i love food

[whatafirefeelslike]

why haven’t i been enjoying food recently

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

[nocturnalcharm]

SWF Alphabet (Logan Howlett)

𐙚 cw: mention of sex briefly, cursing

𐙚 a/n: all of these are just my ~opinions~ so feel free to disagree w me lol also maybe a lil self indulgent so probs not v accurate to wolvie but its alr :,) NOT PROOFREAD

18+ blog!! you are responsible for your own media consumption. if any of the above makes you uncomfortable, do not proceed.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

— doesn’t start out affectionate, but once you’ve got a deep connection, he becomes more affectionate. loves hugs and surprising you with gifts

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

— would start bc of the team obv. feel like he’d be the type of friend where,,, if you called him at 3am, for any reason, he’d be out of the house and otw to you at 3:01.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

— as much as i want to say yes.. like realistically no. bc nightmares and claws and trauma. but likeeee this is my blog bitch so yes hehe. he’s a big cuddle bug. def likes to be the big spoon but doesn’t mind being a lil spoon sometimes.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

— yes, he could see himself settling down but doesn’t rly care for getting married though, he just doesn’t see the point of it.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

— (im crying) if he HAD to, i feel like he’d push it off and become more distant until you ask him what’s wrong, then he’d tell you everything. ookaY NEXT I DONT WANNA BE SAD

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

— i feel like he wouldn’t want to get married, not for a specific reason, just like doesn’t see the point. is committed to you though and if it was rly important to you, he would.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

— hA. physically yes very gentle unless ur having sex. emotionally………. nah. like if it’s a rly serious situation then yeah but he might not realize how serious something is until he’s already made an ass out of himself and then he’s like //oh shit i fucked up//

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

— heheh… yes. he hugs you all the time. literally always. coming up behind you while you’re cooking, or brushing your teeth and bear hugs you. he just likes touching you.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

— oof. he takes awhile to say it. he def says it first though. but like.. awhile. probably like a year.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

— WHEWWWW I BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE. he’s very jealous. he says he’s not. but his actions show otherwise. like says he’s fine but can’t keep his hands off you (when he normally hates PDA) ugh i love it. just wants to show everyone you’re his.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

— passionate. leaves you wanting more. he likes to kiss you allllll overrrr. he likes to be kissed on his neck. and his chest when you’re cuddling and he doesn’t have a shirt on. and lips but duh.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

— cautious, like kinda scared. especially around babies. doesn’t know how to handle them lol

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

— sleepy, cuddly mornings. staying in bed for as long as possible.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

— i like to think you two stay up late together. watching movies, cooking food at midnight, you two often fall asleep on the couch instead of the bed

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

— he doesn’t start getting rly personal until he knows you’re someone to trust, but it’d take awhile. he reveals things slowly.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

— unless you do something to really piss him off, which you wouldnt, i feel like he’d be chill (with u only obv, angry wolvie w everyone else)

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

— sorry but like he remembers every detail you’ve told him. he comes home randomly with a specific candy bar you mentioned you like ONCE 2 years ago and is so proud of himself.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

— when he first said “i love you”. he was so vulnerable and scared honestly but everything was fine and you said it back!!

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

— VERY. VERY BITCH. he will cut a bitch to protect you. literally. ‘touch her and you die’ vibes.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

— i kinda feel like unless it’s something rly important, he wouldn’t put that much effort in but not bc he doesn’t care. bc you like to go over the top and plan out everything lol

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

— isn’t great at communication. prob bottles things up until he kinda blows up whoooops. he definitely tries but has a hard time opening up.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

— he cares, have u seen his lil tufts? isn’t obsessed but puts effort into his appearance. just wants to look good for you!!

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

— ummm yes. it takes a lot for him to open up & be comfortable around someone so if you just weren’t there anymore, for whatever reason, he would feel incomplete

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

— imagining him getting ready for date and he’s styling his lil tufts and ur waiting on him like ‘babe hurry we’re gonna be late!!’ and he’s just trying to perfect his hair so he looks good for you omg

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

— as a yapper this hurts to say but… if you talk too much i feel like it’d annoy him. just imaging you going on and on and on and in his head he’s like ‘get to the mf point ohmygoddddd’

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

— like i mentioned earlier, accidentally falling asleep on the couch lol. sorry but he snores and you have to shake him to make him stop

[runningfrom2am]

leveling the playing field XVI

summary: you can finally go home.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.4k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: capitol brat!reader, maybe slightly ooc coryo, idk i tried my best. do they love each other or hate each other? who knows (we do.). implications and mentions of abuse and some non-graphic violence, so read with caution!! also a little bit of swearing but that's neither here nor there. oh, and manipulation.

a/n: i can't believe this is it :') the final part (excluding the epilogue which is coming v soon). thank you all so so so much for all the love on this fic! it means so much to me that you guys enjoyed it! but don't get too sad (like me) bc i am not ready to let them go so i'll probably do like blurbs and stuff ab this series so stick around for those!

series masterlist // playlist

"Y/N/N. Do you have your clothes from home?" Coryo asks, pulling the boat back up onto the shore. The guns were gone. He's free to go home if he wants.

"Yes." You nod. "I couldn't get rid of them if I wanted." You chuckle, looking up into the woods behind the cabin, hoping Sejanus is long gone by now.

"Okay. You're gonna stay here, just for a few days, and then I'll come get you before the train leaves. I'll take you to Two with me, just wear those. You'll fit in better."

"Okay..." You nod, nervous about being out here all alone for so long.

"I'll come bring you food as much as I can." He knew it would be a long hike each way to come see you, but he would have to carve out the time. He looks up at you quickly from digging through his own bag when he hears you sniffle. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I- uhm..." You clear your throat, fanning your eyes to keep any tears from falling. "I'm just scared." You try and laugh it off, shaking your head slightly.

"Don't be scared." Coryo shakes his head, dropping the bag to grab your shoulders. "Hey, you're gonna be okay, Darling, but we don't have another choice. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"I know, I know that..." You sniff, looking up at him. "Is she dead?"

"Yes." He answers quickly. "I buried her. She can't hurt you." He promises. Was that true? No, definitely not. There was no trace of her after the shot besides her earring on the ground,  but he had hit her. He was sure of it. There was no reason to tell you that, though, just to scare you more. You couldn't go back to town, there was nowhere for you to hide while peacekeepers searched every inch of the populated part of the District for days while he waited for his train.

"Okay." You whisper, taking a deep, shakey breath as you look around at the suddenly scary forested area around you. The rain had started to clear up, which helped with the sun peeking through the clouds to brighten up the lake. If Lucy Gray hadn't ruined everything, you would probably be getting ready to keep moving.

"Just, try to relax out here. Okay? Go for a swim, just enjoy the fresh air." He smiles softly, brushing some hair back out of your face as he tries to make you feel better.

"I've had enough of the woods for the rest of my life." You scoff, shaking your head under his hold.

"I know, Y/N/N, I'm sorry. It's only a few days. Like I said, I'll come back for you whenever I'm free." Even if he could only stay for five minutes before he had to turn around and make the trip back to town, he would do it. "Then we'll figure everything out. I'll handle it."

"I... I just want to go home, but I can't." You cry, letting him wipe your tears as your chest flushes with the emotion.

Coryo winces at your tears. He hates seeing you cry, and he has seen it far more times than he would have liked to in the last few months. "I'm going to figure it out. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you ever again. I promise." He says softly, trying to get you to look at him.

You lean into his palm, closing your eyes as you try desperately to pull it together. You were exhausted, but this was the last thing Coryo needed right now. "I'm sorry. I'm just having a moment."

"I know. You're okay." He chuckles, planting a kiss on your forehead and pulling you into a hug, rocking your body gently back and forth. "You know, I think the last time you said that to me was the day I realized I was in love with you." He hums, squeezing your shoulders gently.

You laugh, which makes him smile. It's what he wanted. "I feel like that's a bit dramatic."

"No, it's true." He grins, craning his neck to look down at you. "You defended me, and you listened to me, and you looked just so pretty doing it..."

You bury your face in his shirt to hide your blush.

"You're always on my team, and I appreciate that. I really do." He explains, satisfied that he's made you feel at least a little better. "I hope you know I'm always on your side, too."

You nod slightly, smiling through your tears as you look up at him. "I know."

"Good." Coryo whispers, kissing your nose. "I love you."

"Really?" You whisper, eyes lighting up as you wring your hands together against his chest in front of you. "You're not just saying that because I'm crying on you?" You laugh slightly.

"No, I do." He nods in confirmation, grinning down at you in admiration. "There's no one else in this world I can trust as much as I can trust you."

"Then why'd you give her your scarf?" You ask, tilting your head. "It looked... valuable."

"It was. It belonged to my mother..." He says solemnly. He suddenly shakes his head, mocking your expression as he changes the tone. "You really were dead to the world, huh? I was holding it, and she just asked if she could see it. Then she didn't give it back." Coryo explains, raising an eyebrow at you. "Why, are you jealous of the dead girl?"

You roll your eyes with a smile on your face, attempting to shove him away.

"Hey, I'm kidding." He laughs, pulling you close again by your wrists. "Don't you trust me?"

"Okay, yes, I trust you." You giggle as he drops your wrists, sliding his hands over your waist.

"And you love me?" Coryo asks, urging you on.

"And I love you." You grin, nodding slightly.

"That's my girl..." He hums, running a hand lower down your side, thumb running over your midsection as he leans in to kiss you. He had you right where he wanted you, he'd wanted to say that for ages. Only since he even clued into the fact that the buzz he gets under his skin when he catches you smiling, anyway. Realistically, you were something he had always wanted. Picturing his future over the last few years when he was dragging himself out of bed every morning desperate to arrive to class on time even on an empty stomach, his daydreams of his success always included your own, as well.

Now, it was only the two of you. He was so right about you, you were perfect in every way. Smart, obedient to him and only to him, but you fought for what you wanted. You knew struggle, pressure, and soul crushing expectations in the same way he did. Through all of it, you were there for him. You were beautiful- and he was the only one smart enough to see past your occasional outbursts. No one knew how to navigate you like he did, and he was lucky that few people ever bothered to try.

The most beautiful girl in all of the Capitol, and you were his. He meant it when he said that he would never let anyone hurt you. He couldn't let anyone take you from him.

"Do you know where we're going? Where Tigris and your Grandma'am are living?" You whisper, curled up next to Coryo on the train as it pulls into the Capitol station. You're holding the orange silk scarf in your hands, using it as a small blanket in the cold train car. You had spent most of your time out by the lake trying to clean it- but dirt was a stubborn stain. You'd have to be more thorough once you had access to cleaning supplies again. You couldn't let such a lovely piece of clothing go to waste, especially when it was so valuable to him.

"I don't..." Coryo mumbles in response, staring out the window as you lean your head against his shoulder, knees tucked up to your chest. "They shouldn't be hard to find, though."

The wheels screech to a slow stop in the familiar city, and you can't help but smile at the endless sea of grey architecture. It wasn't anything like the forest in Twelve, and you loved it. The door slides open and some peacekeepers enter, drawing both of your attention as you sit up away from him.

"Dr. Gaul is expecting you both in her lab immediately." One of them informs you, and you nod a little bit, looking nervously over at your boyfriend.

You hung off his arm for the entire car ride and all the way to the lab as you're escorted by the men in the matching uniform to his own. Your clothes were dirty, despite how many times you cleaned them back in District Twelve. You had cleaned them obsessively throughout the last couple of months, but the water was never quite clear enough to be helpful. It was vile. Surely you smell unpleasant due to this, and you were hoping you would have a shower before confronting anyone from your previous life, but clearly, you weren't so lucky.

"Do I stink?" You whisper, trying to avoid the echo of the large room as your heels click across the linoleum flooring.

"Not any more than I do." Coryo answers, a small smile pulling on his lips as he glances down at you.

You giggle, gently slapping his chest as he removes his hat.

"Congratulations, Mister Snow, Miss Y/L/N. You've passed all my tests." You look up at Dr. Gaul for the first time as she speaks to you, tossing something into a pool on her floor. "I've asked President Ravenstill to grant you both a full pardon, effective immediately."

You don't say anything as you both stop in front of the tank in the ground, staring into it as Coryo revels in the shock. "I also told him that you are too promising to be wasted in the Districts. So you will be studying under me at the Capitol University."

While she speaks, you pull Tigris's coat tighter around yourself at the slimy, vicious look of whatever creatures are splashing around inside that tank that she is continuously feeding.

"We can't afford university." Coryo answers on your behalf, forcing you to look up at the woman across from you. While you were incredibly grateful, you were scared. Things were complicated back at your parents' home, and even with a legal form of forgiveness, it's not likely your father will see it the same way. You couldn't go back, and he wasn't likely to give you a dime or let you go free. Within the week, you'd probably die from an "unknown illness" contracted in the Districts if he found out you were home.

"A certain Mister Strabo Plinth has offered to pay for everything you need while you're there. All for being such good friends to his Sejanus." Dr. Gaul explains and your heart drops in your chest. You can't help but wonder if he's even still alive out there, in the North. "He doesn't know quite how good a friend you were, of course. I never mentioned your little recording. Quite impressive, Mister Snow, how you sent your only friend to the grave just to get my attention."

"That's not what I did." Coryo shakes his head at the allegation.

He squeezes your arm in warning, knowing this topic was a fine line to walk. "Are you sure? Because I think that won you the Plinth Prize, after all."

"Sejanus Plinth is not dead." You blurt out without thinking. She tilts her head at you, looking at you intensely, a knowing smile growing on her lips.

"Oh?" She asks, and internally you struggle for a saving grace while Coryo furrows his brow at you. You hadn't seen Sejanus since you sent him away, but you did try looking for him in your days out there alone. You had to believe he was alive, after you gave him his way out.

"Well, I heard that he had escaped in Twelve. As far as I know, they never found a body. He planned on running off anyway. That's likely what he did." You explain, clearing your throat.

"I agree. That is likely, but the odds he would survive out there..." She shakes her head slightly, dropping another treat into the tank as the creatures snap at it. "Anyway, the president has agreed to another year of the games! People watched, and I have you kids to thank for that."

You and Coryo wear matching grins now, posture perfect to match your collective pride.

"But before I take you under my wing, after everything you've seen out there in the real world, let me ask you one final time." Dr. Gaul says, looking pointedly between the two of you. "What are the Hunger Games for?"

You look up at your boyfriend, nodding for him to answer. "I used to think that the Hunger Games were a punishment for the districts. Then, I thought they served as a warning to us here in the capitol, about the threat the districts posed. Now I know the whole world is an arena. And we need the Hunger Games every year to remind us all who we truly are."

"And who are you, do you determine?" Coryo looks down at you as she speaks.

"We are the Victors." You finish with a proud smile, looking at the woman across from you who seems more than pleased with your answer.

"Coriolanus, what are you doing back so soon?" Your mom greets him as she opens the door of your childhood home, smiling sadly, confused as to the condition of his return.

"Good afternoon, Ma'am." He smiles politely, grey uniform cap now clutched to his chest. "I proved to be exceptional in my training. Dr. Gaul saw it was better Y/N and I work under her at the University."

"Y/N?" Your mom gasps, reaching up to cover her mouth with her hand. "She's alive?"

"I assure you, she is safe." Coriolanus nods. "Now, may I speak with your husband? I won't take up much of his time." He brushes past her, entering the home without waiting for permission.

"Well, dear, where is she?" Your mom asks, letting him pass and closing the door quickly. "Why hasn't she come home?"

"I think you know why she hasn't come here." He hums, looking around. "Where is he?"

"His study." Your mom answers quietly, gesturing up the stairs. "I'll walk you."

"No need. I know where I'm going." He gives her a small smile in return, following the familiar path toward your room.

He stops in front of your father's study, knocking before taking a step back. The force of habit leads him to stand at attention while he waits for permission to enter.

"I'm busy, don't bother me." Your father's voice echoes through the ornate lining on the door. Then he realizes, he doesn't need permission. Not anymore.

Coriolanus huffs, opening the door and stepping in.

"I said-" Your father growls, slamming his pen down on the desk before he looks up and takes in the grey of Coriolanus's decorated peacekeeper uniform. "Coriolanus."

"Sir." He nods in response, closing the door quietly behind himself. "May I sit?" He asks coldly, gesturing to the chair across from him.

"Please." Your father nods, brow furrowed as to what the blonde boy could possibly want, or what he is doing back so soon.

"Y/N isn't here, son." Your father sighs. "She-"

"I know that." Coriolanus interrupts, placing his hat on the desk between them.

"You know where she is." Your father's tone is unsurprised, but questioning.

"I do." He confirms, back straight in the chair. He had always been afraid of your father, but this was built on an admiration. He reminded him of what little he remembered about his own father. This morphed into anger slowly but surely over the last few years, picking up several hints either in your appearance, demeanor, or choice of words which painted an incredibly unflattering picture of who the man sitting in front of him truly was.

Your dad hums in response, eyes locked on the boy. "How was your summer?"

The question catches Coryo off guard, but he puts all his focus into maintaining his poise. He has the upper hand, here, and he has to keep reminding himself of that. "It was good. Certainly an eye-opening experience, the people out there are very... different."

"Then what brought you back so soon?" His neglect to even ask where you were, if you were okay, if you were even alive makes Coryo's blood boil in his veins.

"Dr. Gaul." Coriolanus states, swallowing before he continues. "She granted your daughter and I a full pardon in exchange for taking an internship under her at the university. After all, that is her dream, is it not?"

Your father's eyes narrowed slightly at the mention of your name. "It was." He agrees.

"Is." Coriolanus corrects him, leaning forward with his elbows on the desk. "Strabo Plinth has offered to pay our way."

"Of course he has." Your dad chuckles, but not an ounce of humour reaches his eyes. "Self righteous bastard..."

"Seeing as you don't care about her as much as you care about your own reputation, he saw it would be a way to repay her for her loyal friendship to his son. She saved his life twice, after all." Coryo ignores your father's comment, watching as the gears turn in his head, trying to remember the second time.

"I know you think you understand my daughter, Coriolanus, but there are some parts of her you will never know. Not truly." Your father responds coolly. "So, I'm not sure what she has told you, but-"

"But nothing." Coryo cuts him off, leaning back in his seat. "Here is what is going to happen. You will have nothing to do with her, her life, her mistakes, or her decisions any longer. Since, in your own words, you see her as such a burden, I am willing to free you of that."

Your dad grits his teeth together, and it's his turn to lean forward. "Coriolanus Snow, you will not speak to me that way in my own home. Y/N is my daughter, and I shall be involved as I please and I shall do with her what I deem appropriate to consequent her actions."

"No." Coryo replies sternly, standing up abruptly, unabashed by the sound of the chair scraping across the wooden floor as he slams his fist on the desk. "She is eighteen. I  take responsibility for her now, and unless you want to lose everything you and Highbottom have built, you will cut me in on every dime you make. Do you understand?"

Your dad laughs again. "And who will believe you, Coryo? You're just kids. You don't know what you're talking about. Whatever she told you is untrue. Simple as that."

"Would you like a list?" Coryo threatens. "Is that a risk you're willing to take, Y/D/N?"

He sighs, standing up to look eye to eye with him, clearly seething with the disrespectful use of his first name. "She's more trouble for you than it's worth, Son."

"That is my decision to make." Coryo says through gritted teeth.

"Suit yourself." Your dad raises his hands in defeat, careful to not show any fear. Coriolanus could see through it, though. He's won, and he knows it; it was a great deal, if your father was smart enough to see it that way. "How much do you want? Money is nothing to me."

"More than Highbottom gets." Coriolanus requests plainly, grabbing his hat and placing it back over his head. "And you'll pay for our wedding." He adds casually, pushing the discarded chair back into its place. "You'll pay for as many dresses and parties as she wants, every drink, every slice of cake, and every last flower she wishes for exactly how she wishes for it. No compromises, and no surprise appearances from you. Are. We. Clear?" He speaks clearly, intentionally enunciating every word with a trace of venom.

"Crystal." Your father scoffs, taking a drink from the whiskey glass on his desk.

Coriolanus nods, giving him a small smile. "Good. I'll be expecting the money orders every other week." He grins smugly, giving your father a quick bow before heading for the door, stopping as his hand brushes over the handle. "All due respect, Sir, which I deem to be very little, but what you have done to your daughter over all these years is what has made her into the woman you hate. Don't think I was the only one who noticed, and you would deserve every bit of harm we could do to your name. If you ever so much as speak to her again, I will kill you myself."

Coryo glances back at your father's expression only briefly before leaving. He couldn't resist the satisfying look of loathing and anger on the man's face.

The small smile sticks as he walks down the stairs, hearing the crystal glass shatter as it's thrown against the door behind him.

Finally, you were totally even.

taglist: @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @klplynn , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @gloryekaterina , @andrewgarfieldsbitch , @queenofspades6 , @pepperonipastas , @ladybug0095 , @lunamothwrites , @sbrewer21 , @mus-tbe-a-weasley , @splxtscreen , @unclecrunkle , @karmaswitch , @coconut-dreamz , @nekee-lilac02 , @ooooglymoooogly , @riddlerloveb0t , @lovedbalances , @notyourwildestdream , @snowlandson-top , @too-lit-for-fanfic , @utopiakys , @deafeningballoonnacho , @roosterschanelslut , @chmpgneprblem , @cosmoetik , , @urvampgfsworld , @carolanns-world@nan-nie , @shakespearseclipse , @iovemoonyy , @notyoursweetheart-honey ,  @xyzstar , @eatpizzasass, @slytherinholland , @queenofshinigamis , @elodiebeau , @soulessjourney

taglist is closed for coryo unfortunately, but my requests for him are open!! so send me all your suggestions!! requests here!!

[sturniolos-blog]

So here is my request for dad matt so you have two kids obviously and it's been hard trying to get 'alone time' and when they finally do the baby wakes up and it's a disaster but at the end it works out and they have their 'alone time'

P.S. love ya💙😇☠️

Alone time - Matt Sturniolo x Y/n Oneshot

warnings - smut, cute, swearing, kissing, fluff, interruptions

smut summary: p in v, (unprotected with bc), praising, fingering

—————————

1:47pm

I walk in the house from grocery shopping, holding bags of food.

My two year old looks up at me with toys in his hands, “Mama!” He yells, dropping the toys and running up to me.

I laugh, “Wait, baby, wait.” I struggle with the grocery bags, bringing them into the kitchen.

Mailo tugs on my shirt. Getting impatient as he lets out whines.

“Mailo, baby, wait!” I raise my voice.

Mailo then starts crying as he holds his arms up, wanting to be held.

I try to put some groceries away but with Mailo still tugging on my shirt and letting out whines it was impossible.

I lean down and pick up Mailo, “Can you chill out?” I whisper before Matt comes out with Estrella in his arms, she had tears running down her cheek as she sniffled.

“Oh, baby, what happened?” I asked as Mailo rested his head in the crook of my neck.

“She doesn’t feel good, she threw up.” Matt says, kissing Ella’s forehead as she had her arms wrapped around his neck.

I nod, “Okay, i can call the doctors office and make an appointment for tomorrow.” I walk up to Ella as her eyes were red and teary, i felt her forehead, she was burning.

“Aw, baby.” I mumble. Matt gives me a sad smile.

She perks her head up and puts her arms out to me, “Mommy,” She whines.

I try to put Mailo down but he starts crying and tugging on my clothes once again.

“Mailo stop!” I yell.

He cries, “Pick me up!” He grabs me.

Ella starts whining, “Mommy!”

“Okay, Mailo come on. I think you need a nap, buddy.” Matt says as i take Ella in my arms.

Mailo throws a tantrum, “No! Daddy no!” Mailo yells as Matt grabs him and picks him up.

Ella holds onto me tightly as she sniffles.

“Okay, calm down baby. I’m here..” I whisper, kissing her forehead.

—————————

2:34pm

Matt walks downstairs as im washing dishes, he comes behind me and kisses my neck, his arms around my waist. “They’re asleep..” He whispers against my ear.

I laugh, “We’ll see how long this lasts..” I say as i finish washing the dishes, drying my hands.

Matt chuckles and spins me around, pressing my back against the sink as he takes the towel from my hands, putting it on the counter as he leans down and kisses me.

I smile into the kiss and wrap my arms around his neck, he presses into me making me let out a soft sigh into the kiss.

His lips leave my lips to trail to my jaw, then down to my neck, sucking softly as i run my fingers through his hair.

Matt pulls away to look at me, smirking slightly. “We should-”

“Mommy! Daddy!” Mailo yells from upstairs.

Matt lets out a huff, his head dropping into the crook of my neck.

I kiss his head, “I know, Matt..” I sigh.

“Daddy!” Mailo yells again.

Matt picks his head up and starts to walk away, “Coming, bud!”

—————————

9:47pm

I walk out of the bathroom and let out a long tired sigh.

Matt puts his phone down and puts his arms out for me.

I comply, climbing on the bed and crawling in between his legs, laying down on his chest.

Matt kisses my head and rubs my back.

“Tired?” He mumbles against the top of my head.

“Mmm..” I hum in response, nodding against his chest.

“Let me take care of you..” Matt whispers, his hands trailing to my waist.

I smile, “Matt-”

He cuts me off, “Please?” He pleads.

I sigh and nod.

He chuckles and kisses my head, flipping us over so he’s on top.

He kisses down my neck as he rests in between my legs.

He pulls my shirt up to reveal my breasts since i wasn’t wearing a bra as i was gonna go to sleep.

My nipples were already hard from the temperature change, he smirks and kisses my left breast, sucking on my nipple slightly as i arch into his mouth.

His right hand fondles my other breast as my hands go to his hair.

His hands then move down to my pants, pulling my shorts down along with my underwear with complete ease.

He reveals my pool of arousal. He chuckle, “Aw, baby..” He mumbles.

He rises back up on top of me, kissing my lips as his fingers circle around my clit, i moan into his mouth as i buck my hips up.

He hums, sticking his tongue into my mouth, swirling around as he sticks a finger easily in me.

I pull away from the kiss to let out a moan.

“Matt..” I hiss, rolling my hips against his hand.

“Shh.. don’t wanna get interrupted again, right baby?” He hushes me, adding another finger as i bite my lip.

I shake my head, he chuckles and kisses my cheek.

He then pulls his fingers out of me, leaving me empty, i let out a whine.

“I know, n/n. I know, wait.” He says, now he was fumbling with his sweatpants, desperate as his hard on begs to be released.

He pulls down his sweatpants and reveals his erection. I squeeze my legs together at the sight, begging for some relief.

He spreads my legs apart again and gets ready in between me, him rubbing his fingers up and down my slit again and rubbing his own cock in it.

He then pushes in me slowly, his mouth dropping slightly.

He gives me a minute to adjust since we haven’t had sex in a while, but he then slowly starts thrusting in.

I let out a couple moans, trying to suppress them.

“So, so good. Fuck, y/n.. i’m already gonna cum, so pent up, all these weeks, not fucking you.” He speeds up, clapping sounds filling the room along with Matt’s groans and my whimpers.

I clench around him, “Matt, i’m cumming!” I warn, still trying to be quiet.

“Fuck, baby, me too. G-god, holy, fuck.” He groans before finishing in me, coating my walls with his cum as he continues to thrust in a couple more times before pulling out, watching his cum drop out of me.

He smiles before leaning down and kissing me, “Good job, baby.. let’s get you cleaned up.” He mumbles against my lips.

—————————

the smut was messy and rushed and this like whole fic was like bad personally and sorta short but i hope you guys enjoyed it!

taglist: @sturniolosmind @novasturniolo03 @hearts4chriss @vinniehackerslefttoe @christhopersturniolo

[keii]

Posting randomly on here to go what the fuck about that MHA ending.

Spoiler-ish ahead but Bakugo??? TT TT Like idc about ships… tbh if any shounen series was written in a way where romance and ships will be a component… then at least make me believe it!!! Don’t just randomly have one last chapter to push a ship that had v little development and make me think that it’s good??? It’s the same with how I felt with Naruto and the Last movie where the whole ass time Naruto was pinning for Sasuke and whenever he was talking about a “girl he likes” that mf always said Sakura— AND THEN HAVE ONE PIDDLY ASS MOVIE WHERE SAKURA SAID “you never loved me Naruto.” And Naruto was like “oh yea u right. My bad.” HUUUH Like Naruto had more emotional moments with Gaara than Hinata— anyway this isn’t about that.

Uhhhh JUSTICE FOR BAKUGO?? 8 years of his life working to make Deku’s dream come true after spending majority of their childhood bringing him down and regretting that— ONLY FOR DEKU TO REJECT HIM JOINING HIS AGENCY— like I get that Deku is a teacher now and I do like that tbh… and he was warming up to him too!!! But I just— who was that!!! I WAS STARTING TO REALLY LIKE YOU DEKU I HAVE A FIGURE OF YOU! I know that having characters grow up and change from their teen years into adulthood is a realistic thing but for Deku to just completely change his goals… guess the title didn’t deceive me… it really was Deku’s hero academia… literally… I just… look… idc about ships… but I just wanted Bakugo to look happy at least?? LIKE HE LOOKS GOOD AS HELL!! BUT HELLOOOO 😭😭😭 not him getting rejected in his Porsche!! The memes that came from this KILLS ME THO… like I am crying bc of how tragic but funny they were… “I loved him you know.” BITCH LMFAOOO not even number one— not even top ten hero ranking omfg… it’s okay Bakugo… now you can achieve your dream of being number one…

I missed the memes of Deku being a fast food worker bro… Like yeah it’s sad… but it’s funny— the ones with Bakugo is TRAGIC (but funny) ALSO ALSO not him and Ochako ending it with a bro dap. I did that with Hun and asked if it was a romantic gesture and he said “no… this is like… hey bro.” 😭 Like why wait 8 years to finally talk about things… it would make sense if like… idk Ochako was at a diff country being a hero there but dude hello… she’s right there and ya’ll never really talked before then? I liked the idea that Ochako was able to stand on her own and find her own goals (which was influenced by Toga) and only for her to be used as the woman who was the potential heroine for Deku… like at this point if your manga doesn’t really super focus on that ship, WHY DEDICATE THE LAST CHAPTER TO THAT it just seems so out of place… 😭 (how I felt with Naruto: The Last where it backtracks the entirety of all those years to try and make them a thing….)

Okay rambling over.

[maybeimamuppet]

43 Janis/ 27 30 Veronica/ 3 24 my boy Damian/ 3 Cady Karen plss

hello nonnie thank youuuu !!!

let’s get into this shall we this is gonna take me another hour lmao /pos

JANIS

43 - 3 favorite foods and 3 they despise

loves:

1. sushi. she will repeatedly eat gas station sushi knowing ahead of time it will make her sick bc she loves it that much

2. anything pumpkin. latte. bread. cookies. pie. she loves spooky season so it cheers her up when she’s sad. her most common activity with damian is making some yummy pumpkin treat and one of them crying into the batter or whatever

3. pineapple. it eats you back and she respects the metal vibes of that hardcore

hates:

1. spaghetti. she ate a worm on a dare as a child and never recovered. any other pasta is fine tho

2. fish because it makes her think too hard

3. popsicles bc they always melt weird and get everywhere. and regina teases her bc. yknow.

VERONICA

27 - their guilty pleasures

bold of you to assume she doesn’t feel guilty about all of her pleasures

ummm. buying new notebooks and journals and never using them. one specific slightly more expensive brand of cigarettes. “ocean” scented bubble bath. carrying around new books and sparking conversations with guys about them and seeing how long it takes them to realize she’s never read it.

i don’t know what a guilty pleasure is i’m realizing

30 - sleeping habits

HA

if she sleeps she’s a very light sleeper. she’s always been naturally inclined to stay up late and sleep in but after canon and her mental health declining she’s borderline nocturnal. she wakes up if the wind blows too hard outside and is tormented by nightmares for years so she tries to avoid sleeping until she just crashes. her bloodstream is like 72% coffee.

DAMIAN (my baby boy thank you 😭😭)

3 - obscure headcanon

when (or if) ever janis gets married he just materializes in her house sometimes. janis’ partner is more used to it and okay with it than she is.

they did not give him a key.

24 - most annoying habit

this man never stops singing a moment of his life. shower? singing. cooking? singing. studying? singing. sleeping? singing. and it’s always a new musical song he doesn’t know all the words to or the tune quite right yet and e v e r y o n e is fed tf up. and he also dances literally everywhere.

CADY

3 - obscure headcanon

she can talk backwards. sentences and words.

KAREN

3 - obscure headcanon

tacos are to karen what sushi is to janis.

she will seek out tacos wherever she can find them. whatever’s in them doesn’t matter. crunchy. soft. chipotle. taco bell. street tacos. she’s a wanderer when she’s drunk (and also sober) and the first place they look for her is the nearest taco establishment. burritos? get outta here. she will eat tacos from the garbage if they are available.

let baby go to taco bell!!!!

[magicratfingers]

Progress report ! ૮ ºﻌºა ✨ kind of a work-in-progress diary for myself. v indulgent.

intense world of dick terrifying - goin good! got a main character, some supporting characters, figuring out the big rivalry today. Gotta figure out a format. I was thinking of basing it off of the Day at the Airport book bc it's only about 11 spreads but there's a lot going on on each one. Could leave it a comic but I also want it to be printable hmm catnips cantrips chooseyer-by-mail test - learning a lot! the world-building has been reallllllly fun - like the kind of fun where you want to go a little deeper bc you like it not bc you have to. perfect situation. Gotta resolve the mix between the DM roleplay and the actual postcards. Made and branded a whole gmail account and character to handle lost postcards - Pizza Kentucky III of the Isekai Post Office. Haven't been keeping up with the blog. But the blog is supposed to be more of a holding container than a 'thing'. One thing I did not expect to be learning was spreadsheets. Keeping track of names and addresses and choices and paths has given me a new perspective on pacing and structure. Also? Been a great excuse to finally play with UV epoxy and it's so straightforward that I'm mad it took me so long. media thats not just webcomics - dunmeshi is out!!! Laios my beloved. Still afraid to find and read Kotteri's Veil bc it will make me too feelings. Started reading books I loved as a kid (Redwall!!!) and some story craft books (found an NPR list somewhere) WRHP s2 - started to feel like work but changing up the backgrounds freed me up, feels fun again Sorcerer comic - paused while I wait for fashion inspiration to pull the ending together Emotional support paladin - paused till I feel like it. It's got such a specific delivery style that I don't wanna force to get the story out, so i gotta wait for some story aspects to firm up Bonnie & Clawd - more of a character study than a comic - fun to practice cutie pies cuddling. But... how DO birds and wolves smooch. Saw a youtube video about how ravens and wolves are friends and work together. So perfect. Valentines day thing - got some supplies coming tomorrow, gonna try out my idea. If it works maybe sell it? If it doesn't work, oh well, probably will learn something. Wanted to make perforated cards and stickers but got a little overwhelmed thinking about printing. Might just do a digital thing if an idea comes to me. Been wanting to make holographic stickers but when I sit down to think of a motif it feels stressful. Maybe I just test the Poodle Broadcasting System logo? I've always loved the aesthetic of valentines day but never felt like it's been delivered right. I certainly never felt indulged - something is always a little not-cute or too-cutesy. Think it could be really fun to have it be an annual 'surprise box'. I lost my halloween fam in the schmivorce so I could use a holiday to go crazy on. (For years I would drive out and help build a whole haunted house in a garage and it was like a week-long party with great food and movies and laughs. Sad to lose it, sadder still to know it was so easy for them to lose me. ) Dishupon - ok not as many players and responses as I'd hoped. But that wasn't really the point. Point was to invent some sanrio-y characters for fun - which i did. And I will also say that the exercise of coming up with a variety of cozy, fun, silly, spicy ways to think about dishes has made MY dishes mostly effortless. Even made a little foam clay Tiger coach and he's sitting on the window above the sink. Perhaps I will think of a game to get my car inspection done.

Overall January is great. Granted, it's the 4th. Had my ten year work anniversary (idk how old everyone thinks I am but it's Not 20) and got to 1010 followers on twitter on the same day. And the new d20 is out on the 10th so that felt real nice and square. Bit worried that all the good vibes I built up over holiday vacay will get smashed when I'm put on a new work project. But i feel like I'm about to level up a little bit art-style wise. Feelin grateful, feelin warm & cozy

[chryblossomjjk]

bts fic recommendations | 01.10.23

→ hi friends! this is a little segment i do every tuesday (reviewsday get it, aren't i funny, pls tell me how funny i am) where i read and review two-three fics. as a content creator, i know how big of a role other creators play in your growth, therefore, i want to do my part in making sure everyone gets the recognition they deserve! so with that being said, please check out the amazing fics listed below. make sure to like, reblog, and leave feedback! ♡ #reviewsday #kikirecs

pina coladas (pt 1 + pt 2) - @han-nah-banana (jjk x reader | established relationship, smut, angst, fluff)

ok so um... the attention to detail is off the charts! like when the little things you mention about jungkook and oc, like them eating healthy foods, only having sex in the missionary position, etc. tells us so much about them and the status of their relationship. like you showed us that they were stuck in a boring, mundane relationship through little hints and i really love that. ALSO POV SHIFT IN PART ONE WAS SO GOOD! like the way their thoughts mirrored one another was such good storytelling ugh!!! also think you picked a great setting for this type of story, the 80s. it makes everything feel so real, like the sexual repression oof! so glad they got to bang it out in the sexiest way in pt 2! really really good for your first fanfic like WOW! loved it!

i can do better - @here4btsfics (pjm x reader | fwb, smut)

summary: your boyfriend of two years just dumped you and you’re angry and sad. so get hammered with your coworker at his place and eat bad food and watch trash tv which leads to some interesting conversations.

bro all you did is enforce my delusions that irl men cannot compete bc they are not park jimin. men should apologize for not being park jimin at this point. even kim taehyung... anywho lmao. DUDE and then oc listing all the things perfect about jimin. she is just like me fr!!! also like this is kind of how i picture jimin in real life ngl. THAT MAN IS A COCKY CONFIDENT DOM I WILL ARGUE THIS SHIT UNTIL IM BLUE IN THE FACE GTFO! and miss oc... no strings attached girl??? A WHOLE BLUFF. honestly, this entire fic is one of my daydreams when im in a lecture and i fucking loved every second of it bby! so so good. so glad you decided to start writing again, extremely proud of you.

darksided - @eoieopda (myg x reader | established relationship, smut)

summary: min yoongi adored you. he'd simply never hurt you.

i saw someone post about smut where the characters are so grossly in love is their fav genre. this is exactly that. this fic encompasses everything i love in fanfic. i felt like a fly on the wall, being dropped into the middle of the situation where i figure out who the characters are through their actions, words, etc. you do that so perfectly here. like the way i know everything i need to know about min yoongi through the FUCKING setting?? naur this is s tier writing right here. also there's just something you do with words thats v magical. can't put my finger on exactly what it is but here is an example:

"a quick survey of the landscape before you indicated that this was a criminal oversimplification."

LIKE IDK JUST SOMETHING ABOUT HOW YOU STRUCTURE SENTENCES IS GENIUS! like cannot even begin to describe how good this was. would die for this couple honestly. the smut had me clenching too OOF. so cool to see what you've accomplished on this platform in such a short period of time! it's so so deserved and i can't wait to see where you go from here. don't know how you can even get better than this like ur already at the moon um!!! but god it's only going to get better from here. like next thing u know u'll be a famous writer fr. wishing you nothing but the fucking best!!!!

[starjxsung]

hi star <3 how are you?

i’ve been neglecting my responsibilities, reading and watching the bear this week. i gotta clean my apartment soon bc im moving but im waiting for the landlady to tell us 😭 aaaaaand normal people is so good, so sad! i read the book bc i love sally rooney a few months ago and i liked the book a bit better (aside from the no quotations for dialogue bc im dumb and i get lost reading it). the series is rlly good though!

im dying to preorder the album😭 i need my pobs </3 i really wanted a signed one too but jyp shop’s shipping is sooo expensive here. i do have a signed txt postcard tho so we balling too.

xdh have the cutest pcs!! i got my album a few days ago (as well as my golden hour ateez ones, i pulled everyone except wooyoung & yunho </3) and i pulled jooyeon and jungsu! and i absolutely adore my pcs and am carrying them everywhere too.

your parents though!!! that’s hilarious. my mom would be the same. whenever i’m watching something kpop related she’s like “that’s binchan (to changbin and chan) ; that’s felix (to hyunjin); that’s lee know (to i.n)”. and if it’s not skz, she’s always saying “that’s v” 😭

i love my converse soooo much!! i wear them everyday too and they will be my lollapalooza shoes bc they’re the best!!!

also i’ve been having ateez dreams lately😭 i dreamt that red-haired san was my classmate and we had the worst statistics test and he comforted me by buying me sushi </3 and yesterday i dreamt that wooyoung was my classmate (am i traumatized with uni? yes) and that they opened a dessert food truck next to the parking and we ate churros after class and made out </333 dream me is really living it up, im jealous </3

i hope you’re doing well! i love your momo pics, keep ‘em coming. she is the most fab <3 ily bb!! i hope you’re week/weekend is sooo good <3

-🐈‍⬛

HI MY ANGEL I have missed chatting with you so much oh my god I haven’t had the time to properly sit down and get thru side blog™️ asks in a while bc I hate half-assing my responses but I’M HERE NOW

You’re moving oh my gosh that’s so exciting !!!! Are you guys living in the same area or somewhere entirely new? I can’t wait to hear about all ur endeavors in new apartment RAHHH that’s so exciting !! Also letting this serve as my gentle reminder to watch normal people, I’ve heard it absolutely ruins you so I’m not emotionally prepared but at the same time I am SO prepared for a little emotional turmoil lmao

Album preorders my opp 💔 I’ve been trying to take a break from buying kpop stuff these few weeks (failing miserably!) but also I heard the signed ones got restocked and then sold out again??? With no warning???? JYPE when I catch you 🤨

AHHHH xdh pcs are so good I have still been dragging my jh everywhere he is never leaving my side I fear…

My converse are my lolla shoes tooooo omg twins 👼 I wore them to global citizen standing for 10+ hours and they were super comfortable! They’re def a little ratty now but I’m not going to break in new shoes standing at a festival so. We ball 💯

ALSO NOT THE ATEEZ DREAMS NOOOOO THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD 💔💔 I had a dream once w pink haired Seonghwa and I have simply not been the same ever since oh my god it felt so real 😔 manifesting more Ateez dreams and making out for u that sounds like. a dream (literally)

I LOVE UUUU BB have the best week!!!! My sister’s away with my parents so it’s just me and Momo and she’s been super clingy but we’re so bffs this week I love her so bad

[hertwood]

dts s5 e9-10: THE FINAL POST

e9: -have not been looking forward to the christian horner episode i must say -GOD listening to everyone talk abt how dominant of a year this was for max knowing whats to come 🙃🙃🙃🙃 -this whole "well we didnt do it on purpose so its not cheating" is SO SILLY like imagine if i went to the irs like sowwy i didnt pay my taxes correctly i didnt know 🥺🥺 doesnt matter ur still getting fined lol -i have always felt that christian's whining here is Extra Obnoxious like he didnt spend YEARS going after every lil thing mercedes might've stepped wrong on. if there was a rumor that mercedes went even $100 over cost cap you KNOW he wouldn't shut up about it but when the tables turned he's such a victim -max is going to be deaf by 40 istg. insert huh cat meme that is him always. (affecionate) -"these people talk shit through the media but'll never say it to my face" have u considered its not bc theyre scared to say it to you but bc you're a rancid person they'd like to avoid interacting with. food for thought -"maybe you feel guilty, i dunno" binotto ate with that one i mean IF THE SHOE FITS -I THINK. as it was in 2020 w/ the pink mercedes. (and in 2007 with mclaren!) the penalty for the cost cap breach should've been a dock in constructors championship points. it wouldn't affect the final standings of 2021 (mercedes beat them anyway, there was a big gap to ferrari in 3rd). it would be a great way to set a strict precedent that would easily motivate teams to be very careful with the budget cap WITHOUT changing any results. FIA hire me -say what u like abt will buxton they will never make me hate you will buxton. the way he is with words explaining drama he is the caesar flickerman of f1 and if you cant appreciate it thats a you issue -showing the singapore grand prix and all i can think abt is iconic post race dando interview. yeah i'm sure the race was cool too i guess -I FUCKING FORGOT HE PULLED THE MENTAL HEALTH CARD bro is seriously like dont talk about the cheating we did think of our poor mental health 🥺🥺🥺 anyway i'm gonna go fire nyck devries midseason brb -WOMP WOMP -once again if the roles were reversed christian would be spearheading a campaign to get a mercedes title stripped be so fucking forreal -more max/gp fics. their dynamic is immaculate chefs kiss -god if lewis won this race it wouldve been so iconic. sad

e10: -ad22 top 10 daniel outfits ever. btw -um lando norris neurodivergent agenda the way he's talking about food here? something going on in that brain. when he ordered 13 spring rolls as a meal in that iconic nortrell stream? that is not a way a neurotypical person eats i swear on god -them asking charles how his season was then immediately cutting to the france crash is so mean. good narrative storytelling, but mean nonetheless -how cathartic it must be for nando to benefit from ferrari blunders lol -pre this season coming out, i remember hoping they'd have a proper focus on carlos' austria dnf. it did get a lil moment but it was, for me, the most shocking mechanical dnf of the season and i was looking forward to seeing more of the inner details of it all. oh well -cinematic parallels between merc & ferrari fighting for 2nd in 2022 AND 2023 -brazil must have some typa rule abt not having netflix there bc they always miss out on the most bangers of races. sad. i love u brazil 22 :') -"they told me i can do whatever i want. when i see carlos, put him in the wall" max i am. i am kissing u. on the mouth. mwah mwah mwah -i DO wish. the focused more on the charles v checo battle. that was simply more important. but i guess that didnt work well with the happy ending they gave checo in e7 so -"omtar might get the last laugh this time around" :)))))) for the last time babey hell yeah -FUCK hate how awkward this dando moment they chose to feature is. they're so much more than that. dts only watchers they're in love and doing the nasty on the reg i PROMISE -this daniel comp is so goofy silly now that hes coming back lmao. i do love him he is so important for the reach of f1 and drive to survive and he deserves all the love he gets -HI LOGAN SO EXCITED TO SEE MORE OF U IN THE NEW SEASON MWAH

[objectlovingobject]

Hello!! I apologize if this has already been asked, or if your asks aren't open currently.

I am heavily questioning objectum, and wondered how you found out/realized it yourself

And, any tips on telling friends ? I am very open with telling my freinds stuff about myself, I am Very anxious and scared about telling them, though

Howdy!

For me, i had a mini awakening when i realized i felt that plushies were sentient(obj sentience is not a requirement of being objectum) and that i could have relationships with them(i conflated platonic feelings for semi romantic during a period of great trauma, but in general i only feel platonic or familial to plushies) i think i had knowledge of what objectum was before that tho, bc i remember googling objectum a little after >< but i forgot abt objectum once i put those stuffies away(they reminded me of sadness)

But my 'true' awakening was a yr or so ago? I was on my computer(dont remember what i was doing) and i looked over at him(my compy) and i was filled with like. Intense affection and desire, so i like... started to kiss him and stuff and wrote some posts on my other blog, before making this one >< but i made this blog so i could figure my stuff out and interact with the community and learn about the culture haha, but also its fun to make posts ^^

When it came to telling friends, i think what i did first was ask if they knew what objectum was, then i said something along the lines of 'ya know when people are in love with their cars? Thats me but my computer' they were v nice and understanding, and its a bit of a meme now lol, like when we watch bobs burgers and bob talks to his utensils/food me and my friends go like 'epic objectum moment' or 'objectum win' and stuff ><

But id gauge their tolerance by asking what they know abt objectum and then slowly leading the convo to saying that you might be ^^

I hope all goes well for you, and i hope ur friends are chill haha! Good luck in ur objectum journey, even if you end up not being objectum ^^

[softsnzstuff]

You Season TWO commentary that again - no one asked for LOL.

If anyone else has watched and wants to discuss, feel free to comment or pop in my DM’s or ask box!! ~KB

🚨 SPOILERS FOR SEASON TWO BELOW!! 🚨

Thoughts

I’m ten seconds in. I grew up in California and I totally have a big spot for it in my heart. I don’t like the bad rep they’re giving LA….

Joe’s voice reminds me way too much of Will Halstead from Chicago Med in a way I’m not a fan of lmaoo. Like if I look away when he’s talking I think it’s Will. ((Doesn’t help that his alias is called Will))

LMAO GUYS! Love (girlfriend) fucking Joe in the back room of their Whole Foods??? In a show called You!?? I said this is familiar. And then I realized. THIS

Jasper what the fuck

The most LA shit in this are the names: Love, Forty and Candle ☠️

I DEF think Forty is banging his twin and I hate it

As someone who’s been with a clinical psychopath/ pathological liar / narcissist / ab*ser, it makes me really angry and sad to watch Joe lie to these women while simultaneously knowing what he’s done and not thinking he’s done anything wrong??

S2E06 - 36 minutes in — TELL ME THE BOYFRIEND DOESNT LOOK LIKE FUCKING CGI

THE REFERENCE TO “BOYHOOD” YES (does that make me one of their ‘Cali douche bags’??)

Jenna Ortega deserved an Emmy for this Episode 9 performance

THE EPISODE NINE ENDING IM FUCKING SCREAMING WHAT?????????

Jfc both these people need SO much help ☠️☠️

STOP I GASPED - YALL KNOW THE SCENE IN NY

Ugh I fucking knew it 🙄🙄

Forty is actually the ONLY sane person in this show smh

Not…..the biggest fan of this ending. But I guess we’ll see what S3 has to offer?????

Headcanons

I feel like Joe is a lightweight

I think he gets colds when he travels

Based on all the unnecessary v*mit scenes, I also think he has a weak ass stomach

((Imma be so real, I’m having a hard time coming up with headcanons because his character is not really someone I super duper wanna read/write just bc of how actually ab*sive he is? ~ Idk Joe reminds me SO much of my ex I just. Physically can’t get turned on by thinking about him sneezing or sick I’m sorry, but happy to share the few hc’s I have!))

[scare-ard--sleigh]

tagged by @maplefiasco 8 shows to get to know me uhhhh in no particular order!!

tagging (no pressure tho!) ;; @cauldronofmorning @angellspt @spacephrasing @ambrwolf @wesninskijr @rolodextra @zapkilikan and anyone else who wants to do it !

what we do in the shadows: wwdits caters to me so heavily. it captures all of my genders. everyone's hot and fucking each other and they're all so fucking stupid. i've watched it 90 billion times and i still laugh bc the jokes still make me laugh.

midnight mass: we're setting aside my taste in men for a minute here. midnight mass does a really excellent job capturing the more horrifying aspects of growing up as an outsider in a very tight-knit religious community. i've never seen that done in a way that's resonated so much. i talked about this show a lot in therapy. plus okay fine; father skinnyjeans thee vampire [chef's kiss.]

the magicians: idk how to sum up the everything about the magicians in a few sentences. i have an eliot prayer candle lmao, his arc and his friendships and the way he does masculinity are so important to me despite the writing having a few missteps (mind the warnings definitely.) the fandom experience is unlike anything i've ever had, yes derogatorily but also in a really good way--my writing got so good because of the things that i created for this show.

steven universe / sailor moon: i combined them because while they're separately very important to me, it's for a lot of the same reasons and i don't feel right putting one without the other. i'm very saccharine underneath everything, i wanna believe love and friendship can heal anything. i grew up on sailor moon, and i think su would have had the same impact on me if i was the right age.

daredevil: where do i even start :( human disaster matt murdock is just like me fr. foggy nelson is who i wish i was (he also reminds me so much of my husband.) i almost went to law school bc of this fucking show. it's the first time i ever saw two guys crying during an argument bc they love each other that much (nelson v murdock is a treasure of an episode.) i didn't dig s3 as much and i hated the defenders but god the rest of it's so good.

bob's burgers: it's less because i think it's deeply telling and more because it's 100% comfort food. if i'm sick or stoned or sad or trying to find a crowdpleaser, bob's is always my go-to. their family and bob & linda's parenting methods are a lot of what i picture for myself when the time comes.

death note: death note was the thing i was obsessed with as a teenager and while i missed a lot of the point of it, it also is what started making me smarter about media consumption, interpretation, and analysis. mello is also like thee gender of all time.

succession: the latest and greatest "oh jeez that's me." like firstly i love watching shows about terrible rich people but to dig deeper: some of the dynamics hit soooo fucking close. i feel like the portrayal of mental illness and abuse are done almost too well: proceed with caution.

honorable mentions:

buffy the vampire slayer: buffy was the first show i ever got like really, really obsessed with (as well as the first canon i ever tried to make an oc for) but it's almost impossible to recommend for actual viewing bc of how badly it's aged. i didn't rewatch it for the many years, cringed through the last one, and am at permanent hiatus since we've entered the Joyce Is Dying arc which is just like painful to watch on top of the uhhh. joss whedon writing.

archer fx: i don't think archer's necessarily required viewing to get to know me, but i've definitely done some of my best writing for that canon and if you're willing to listen to me talk ad nauseam about archer and cyril's dynamic i'll probably love you forever.

[suchsaccharine]

I feel I am in a stalemate. He has shown me and told me that he's not going to try to improve himself or his relationships with me and ___ by seeing a therapist just once even, of course not ..bc there nothing wrong with him. He told me straight up, this is what I'm offering you, nothing more, if you don't like it then figure it out and leave.

Today is the 3 yr anniversary of finding out i can't have kids (naturally, realistically.) and I'm getting my period tmrw and I am struggling so bad with $ so bad my bank account is about to overdraft and I have nothing coming in to look forward to rn. Anyway today I cried and my body hurt and I developed tensions headache that turned into a migraine and I never had one before. It was so bad. And my back is fucked and I'm crying all emotional about everything. My grandma, ___’s baby pics that are lost from my drives suddenly -don't ask I can't talk about it but idk what or how it happened. I saw them not long ago and now everything from exactly Feb 'xx-May 'xx is GONE. I'm devastated to say the v least-, my baby I won't have, having to plan Christmas rn around how sad everyone is about my grandma...like they are allll fucked up in Ohio. I have to go see them. Bf is taking me and ___ for Xmas for 3 days. I told bf this evening .... (hang on I'm gonna c&p a twt I posted to I don't retype.. here..) I said "I am proud of myself for getting thru the past 2.5+ months bc it was grueling work everyday just staying alive… it was so heavy I just started blocking things out entirely the week before finals. But I made it. And I didn’t feel like I would/could.. (2/2) I told my bf exactly what I just posted and his response was to put his face into the back of the couch and start falling asleep until I made the bed for him to lay on w a pillow over his head. Nice. I am completely dumbfounded. I feel like I am an idiot… I am so publicly dumb."

He said that I said a lot and he didn't know what to say and I said that's fine and then he hasn't spoken to me since except to answer "no" when I ask if I said something wrong out there.

I just need more emotional support than he can even detect. How did I end up so entwined with someone so emotionally undeveloped? How did I not see? He tried to control me and I put my foot down and then he tried turning on ___ and I again put my foot down and told him that this isn't working and I will do what's best for ___. He told me that he's not changing his parenting or anything at all so if I don't like him then I need to decide on that. I do like him I just don't like certain things. Some that you can change, like parenting style. Others not as easily, like learning to feel compassion and how to hold space & grace in good faith. How to be there when someone is sad. How to silently be there but not ignore them. I think that I love him but I also think that I will always find myself unfulfilled and resentful that he cannot or will not be there for me emotionally. He no longer has the role of step parent. It probably seems mostly the same to ___ but bf doesn't make any decisions at all. I told him we need to agree or compromise and if no compromise can be had, then we default to what I want. He said no it's all you now. If it's all me then...we're putting on a show for ___. We aren't cohesive. He said he stands by his methods and is unwilling to change that or compromise, so he is like ..resigning? I need some real money and fast. I need a house for ___ and my cats and where I can get ___ a dog. I need a job that pays enough while I also finish school... I probably realistically need to go to the gym for real and stop eating carbs and processed food and get back into sex work. I can't dance cause of my back but I know how to make more money anyway. I can do it. I can do this. I can leave someone I love because they don't have the tools to be there for me in ways I need it most.

I don't need anyone else. I can make my own money. I can pay my own bills and fix my own teeth and maintain my own car.. I can.

[honking-up-a-storm]

6/23/23

Using this page to start off the day cuz idc that there's some doodles already on it. I think it's gonna be another slow day, 4 handicap spots are open, more open past the entrance, and the main lot is very empty. It could fill up who knows, but my hopes aren't very high. Funny how active online I was in 16'-17', maybe it's because that's when a lot of current websites came out that have a clear record. Ungh, I want to do something where is everyone? I guess I can get some reading done today. As long as my feet hold up I guess. I knew there would be slow days, but slow and standing in one spot is killing me. Oh! I bought the book so I can properly do this, it should be coming in 5-14 days, though the seller is in state so it should be quick enough. One car, not gonna touch it since it has the handicap adapter on it, I could drive it but I don't wanna adjust the settings. I think this writing is good for a least cracking a dent in this book. Had a very deep dream where things were okay again, makes no sense. If it's a premonition, I don't want it. Could try reaching out to her though. I feel bad and I miss her. Taking the easy way out isn't cute. There's totally shit going through my head right now that's too fast to write FFS. It's cuz I'm thinking about IT, which is annoying. I've exhausted all thoughts on the subject, made my conclusions, pretty much moved on less than a week later due to good timing on the new circles. I guess I'm frustrated with my exit. I had more time than I thought. I guess it's only natural to have wanted things to go your way. It just sucks cuz I wasn't attached to those thoughts and words anymore and the grief I have for them is still very potent no matter how much I try to hide and deny It. I find it odd too that I didn't feel sad after, I thought over the scenario so many times that I was sure I'd just fall apart, but I didn't and don't feel sorry for myself cuz I was a full-on bitch who deserved it. The frustration and grief are what linger. And I think grief is the appropriate word bc jesus christ I loved them, I loved all of them and I don't know why I was that fucking monstrous (Well therapy helped find the route of that but still, tldr: Family source, took that kinda shit talking as a normal way to vent and be done with it bc worse shit has gone around the house and yet everyone claims to love each other, should have never done it to my friends). And I'm frustrated because jesus christ even though I don't remember much of the exit I know I was just spewing bullshit and was pissed beyond hell that it was happening while I was not in a good spot mentally and physically. They probably think I threw myself into therapy because of the situation, but nah it's because for the first time in my life I let myself stand a little too close to the edge of the train platform and envisioned some things. But shit the only thing that stopped me was my own fear of death and that girl who got her leg torn off by the green line a few days prior. Anywho I'm glad I'm better, obviously not cured or perfect but much much better. My paranoia is gone, I'm less irritable, and life is just enjoyable again. It's kinda funny how I'm working a job where I was only in it for the money (financial issues strike again when the V work is said) but like I'm having like actual fun working, it's literally the perfect job for someone with ADHD, every day is different and I get to move a lot, interact with a lotta people. Also like I work with cars all day, I love driving. I'm in my pink era, I'm starting to love life again.

Notes:

A - Truman show/ Fleabagging, mirroring, mimicking, repeating, fixations, extremely picky with food, shutdown rather than lash out

M - Overstimulation, IFYKYK, sensory issues

N - Can drive, good balance

it feels like summer again

I am made up of so many things

Gift of the day from funny old dude regular: 3 Musketeers bar

"FTM" license plate is real