#and it concluded so shoddily.

[ace-and-ranty]

(STARING AT CEILING)

It’s just, you would NOT believe how feral and unhinged I became when Nico was confirmed gay in HoO, and the follow up was so, so, so disappointing.

[snowdice]

Creased Hoodies (Chapter 12: The End (For Now)) [Folds in Time Universe]

Fandom: Sander Sides

Relationships: Logan/Virgil, Janus/Patton (background), Remus & Roman  (background)

Characters:

Main: Logan, Virgil

Appear: Patton, Roman

Mentioned: Janus, Remus

Summary: Virgil just wanted to go on his planned summer research trip to do an anthropological study in 2005 America. However, when he is taken off course by an unknown enemy, he ends up stranded in the summer of 2018 with no way to get back the the 44rd century. Luckily, 2018 happens to be where a certain illegal time agency is based, and he might have an in with one of its agents.

This is the intermission for the story Folds in Paper. It takes place between Folds in Paper Book 1 and Book 2. It also takes place after the first 5 chapter of “Messages for a Hacker” which are side stories in the universe. Check all of this and more out on my Folds in Time Master Post.

Chapter Summary: It's finally time for Virgil to return home.

Notes: Time travel AU

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

It took Logan a few days to ensure the timepiece and the distortion device were not at risk of blowing up the fabric of time itself. It took about a week more for him to properly study the distortion device Patton had brought home.

“It’s similar to what little we’ve seen of TPI technology,” Logan concluded. He debriefed them all while sitting on the couch with a notebook in hand. “It’s derived from the same technology unlike our time travel devices, which explains why it can block TPI timepieces but not ours. However, it has its differences, and this model in particular is rather shoddily made. While it was meant to create disorder, I doubt almost ripping time apart was its intended purpose, though that is almost what it did.”

“So, you’re thinking whoever made that is from my time then?” Virgil asked.

“Most likely,” Logan agreed. “Though it could always be a Roman and Remus type situation where the culprit was originally from another time period and ended up in your time accidently. However, the origins of this device were certainly the 4500s.”

Virgil glanced at the device set on the coffee table in front of them. It looked more like a 21st century light switch than something with the power to almost destroy time. Even though Logan had been able to study it, there were still many questions Virgil doubted he had an answer to. They didn’t even know why it had been made.

“Do you think whoever made this trapped me here on purpose?” Virgil asked.

“It is a possibility,” Logan mused. “You do work with the TPI and with Janus, a time agent who both is often caught in the chaos these devices create and who runs into Patton frequently. Plus, you know Remus, Roman’s brother, though we didn’t know of the connection before you came to be here. Also, we had a correspondence before this situation. It’s all quite a coincidence if it was not by design.”

“But why?” Virgil asked. “Sure, I’m connected to all of this, but I’m no time agent. All I am to the TPI is a walking history book. I’m not actually involved.”

“Well,” Logan said. “Perhaps someone knows something we do not. Or at least something we do not know yet.”

“Or maybe it’s just a happy accident!” Patton said, though Virgil felt it was more to break the sudden tension that had befallen the room.

“Accident or not,” Logan continued, “we do now have a solution to you being stuck here. I’ve managed to use this device to recalibrate my calculations and pin down its sister device’s current location in this time with much more accuracy. We now just need to get it and turn it off to allow Virgil to leave with his own timepiece.”

“Where is it?” Roman asked.

“A local trash dump,” Logan replied.

“Well, that should be easy enough to get,” Patton said. “Give Roman and I the exact coordinates and we can go and get it now.”

“Wait,” Roman protested. “Why are we the only ones who have to dig through a garbage dump?”

Patton gave him a meaningful look.

“Oh!” Roman said, eyes lighting up. “Oh right!” Then he scowled, remembering the detail that he’d be digging through garbage. “Fine,” he sighed. “The things I do in the name of…”

“Adventure!” Patton cut him off. “It’s an adventure!”

“We’re time travelers. There are so many more exciting adventuring opportunities than dumpster diving, Pat-Pat,” he whined, but he still got up. “I’ll go get changed.”

Patton stood up then and handed Logan his phone, so Logan could download the location of the distortion device onto it.

“We’ll text you when we’re heading back!” Patton said after changing and getting his phone back. “I’ll make sure to give you a 15- and 5-minute warning.” Patton said this with a wink. Virgil immediately hid his face in his hands.

“Do you think the TPI is hiring,” Logan asked as the door closed behind Patton and Roman. “I’d love to move to a different century without those two.”

“Time agents don’t usually live in 4500s,” Virgil said, face still hidden behind his hands. “They’d probably still place you in this century, especially since you’re comfortable here.”

“No escaping them then,” Logan sighed.

“Mmm,” was Virgil’s response.

He felt Logan shift on the couch next to him and a warm palm touched his wrist, gently tugging his hand away from his face. Virgil chose not to resist and let the hand fall away with a sigh. Logan smiled at him when his face was revealed, and Virgil smiled back despite how he could still feel heat in his cheeks.

“You will be going home this evening, I imagine,” Logan said.

“Yeah,” Virgil agreed. It hadn’t fully dawned on him yet. He’d grown used to living here in the past few weeks. He was used to briefly living in other places and times, but here had been different. He hadn’t felt like the observer he usually was. Because Logan, Patton, and Roman knew about time travel and what he really did, he’d had a chance to almost fit in with them. It would be weird to be back in his own time.

“I would like to give you a gift before you go,” Logan said, “If you’ll allow it.”

“Oh,” Virgil said, “uh, okay.”

Logan nodded and reached into his hoodie pocket. He glanced over at Virgil once he’d pulled his closed fist back out. “It is a ring, by the way, but this is not a marriage proposal.”

“Well, I’d certainly hope not,” said Virgil dryly. “An impulse elopement would be off brand for both of us.”

Logan grinned. “Very true,” he agreed. Then, he opened his palm revealing a small, plain ring as promised.

“What is it?” Virgil asked.

“This is an emergency time travel device,” Logan explained. “It’s not particularly complex. It can only take you here to this room between 2 weeks and one year from now, but if you ever find yourself in need, you can use it.”

He offered the ring and Virgil opened his palm. He studied the ring once it was placed in his hand. It was warm, though if that was from Logan’s touch or the technology running in it, Virgil did not know. It was surprisingly light and a rose gold color.

“It also has some security measures,” Logan continued. “It wouldn’t do to make an emergency time travel device that someone else might easily take from you. So, it’s designed to disappear when you put it on. You’ll still be able to feel it and take it off whenever you wish. It will become visible again once it leaves your finger.”

“An invisible ring?” Virgil asked, studying it even more curiously now.

“Yes,” Logan said with a smile. “Full disclosure, it is designed to store your space-time coordinates for up to 48 hours, but as I said, you can take it off whenever you wish and… I promise not to use it against you.”

Virgil looked away from the ring and back up at him. “Okay,” he agreed, surprising himself with the ease at which he accepted this. “Can I put it on?”

Logan nodded, and Virgil slipped the band on his finger. As promised, it disappeared as soon as it passed his first knuckle. He could still feel its unfamiliar weight on his finger.

“You must turn it three times counterclockwise to activate the time travel,” Logan said, making Virgil look up from the seemingly empty space on his finger. “It would drop you pretty much exactly where you are sitting now if you did.”

“Thank you,” Virgil said. He did not feel those words were enough to say when gifted something as impressive as this, but he hoped his tone said enough.

“Don’t use it against me?” Logan asked with a half-smile, and only then did Virgil realize just how much trust was being put onto him. He’d just been given a device that was linked directly to their base of operations despite Virgil working with the TPI.

Virgil shook his head. “I won’t,” he swore.

Deciding to throw his nervousness and embarrassment over last time to the wind, he shot forward to kiss Logan quickly on the lips.

They bumped noses and Logan’s glasses ended up askew in the process, but Logan didn’t seem to mind judging by his delighted laugh when they parted.

“Thank you,” Virgil said again because he still didn’t know what else to say.

“You’re welcome,” Logan replied.

~

The ring continued to sit on Virgil’s finger, invisible but heavy even after Patton and Roman returned from the dump with the device that had caused this whole mess. It was still there when Logan turned off the distortion device and Virgil’s timepiece reactivated. The knowledge of its existence was always in the back of his mind even once he’d made it home and gave the TPI and university an excuse as to why he’d left his trip early. It would stay there even when he received an email from an “unknown sender” making sure he got home okay.

Want to read more? Click below!

Folds in Time Universe Master Post

My Main Masterpost

[protect-namine]

I have this one trial I really want to write, but it takes soooo much setup and I don't have the stamina to commit to a whole killing game rewrite. but hypothetically,

imagine that shuichi takes the fall for rantaro's murder and triggers a bug in the system that turns him into something like a virtual ghost. he's both "dead" and a "spotless" (since he isn't really a "blackened") and that combination allows him to exploit some of the shoddily coded programs of the simulation.

for example, maybe the love hotel only lets you see the fantasy of fellow spotless students (aka anyone who isn't a culprit or victim) and it doesn't check if someone is dead/alive (since the program assumes all spotless students are, well, alive). someone uses the love hotel and is surprised to see shuichi.

maybe shuichi can still vote in the trials even though he's technically dead, since he's still a spotless student. his vote is still valid.

maybe he can't "physically" exist in the academy but he can in the neo world program.

he's like a virtual ghost, and team danganronpa decides that they can't fix all the conditionals scattered in the code to accommodate shuichi being schrondinger's student now, but they can exploit it for views. chapter three was written to be all about ghosts and stuff anyway, and shuichi was supposed to be the protagonist. it'd be a shame to let this all go to waste. so now Danganronpa The Show features shuichi as a ghost in the keebo cam. keebo (and the audience) can see ghost!shuichi! it's illogical to keebo and it's weird to him that he's the only one who sees shuichi, and miu can't find anything wrong with his vision. but it'd be an interesting opportunity for him to be have more "human-like experiences." also, from an audience's perspective, how cool would it be that you can make keebo do things AND you have the ghost of an ultimate detective helping you come up with those decisions? it really feels like you're trying to survive the killing game with everyone else!! how immersive!! it's very novel, and it's a hit with the audience. danganronpa has never been more popular.

so that's the premise. there's a long list of things I want to write from that idea, all culminating in that one trial I want to conclude with. but I guess some highlights:

angie successfully revives rantaro using the necronomicon, because hey this is a story about ghosts. the dead don't stay dead, and it's not just shuichi. also I think it'd be fun if rantaro was the one who calls for trial 6 to look over his own murder once again

when the audience answers a poll to direct keebo, they don't get the details of the results of the survey and don't really know what options in the poll won until keebo actually does something. it's for immersion!!

keebo is the only one who can see ghost!shuichi so shuichi hangs around him a lot and tries to help him with investigations. because keebo is the audience surrogate, the audience sees shuichi a lot and develops a parasocial relationship with him

shuichi gets to interact with other students in other ways. the love hotel bug, for example. the caged child seance from korekiyo also works. shuichi can exist in the neo world program too. also I think it'd be funny to have everyone fight over whether or not the academy is haunted.

there is one downside to the bug and that is that shuichi, by virtue of not actually being the "blackened", never... actually finished his own execution. he exited out early because the bug made him error out of the program. so now, after every trial when monokuma executes a blackened student, the simulation thinks that shuichi is queued for execution as well since he didn't get to finish his own. nobody else sees it, but keebo and the audience are forced to witness shuichi get executed and error out of it every trial. this adds more to the parasocial relationship the audience has with shuichi, who is whumped to hell and back over and over

kokichi and kaede are the new protagonists that try to carry on shuichi's last wish of finding the truth of the killing game. that by itself already has a lot of interesting dynamics. kokichi would catch on to shuichi lying in trial 1, so he already doesn't really trust kaede after that. kaede would struggle with the guilt, especially when rantaro comes back via the necronomicon, and also her leadership would be tested by kokichi and later angie's student council

kokichi and kaede are always on opposing sides for most of the story, up until ch5 when kokichi accidentally kidnaps kaede instead of kaito or whoever he was gonna use for his "pretend to be a mastermind and if that fails create an unsolvable murder" plan. they finally work together and just as kaede is about to lower the hydraulic press... ding dong bing bong, a body has been discovered!!

so we finally get to thing that really makes me want to write this. imagine now that shuichi is somehow back in the game. maybe it's because he technically can exist in the neo world program and miu just makes a body for him or something, or maybe there's a virtual necronomicon in the neo world program that works the same as the one in the academy. either way, shuichi is back and he is TIRED, he wants to get this over with, he wants this killing game to end. he already figured out that keebo is being used as a camera for the outside world. keebo is the only one who really knows the extent of what shuichi's been through. so now he asks: keebo, will you please just end my suffering? can you please just kill me?

when rantaro calls for trial 6 to go over the details of his murder and they all realize that trial 1 was a sham, then who's to say that the other trials weren't fair? they circle back to trial 5 where keebo killed shuichi. now here's the big question: was it keebo who killed shuichi? or was it the audience? if danganronpa is "real fiction" then what does it mean if the audience killed shuichi? it's one thing to watch a script being played out on tv, but it's another to be an active participant.

idk, I still love the ending of V3 in canon but I think shuichi convincing the outside world to give up on danganronpa is a huuuuge stretch. maybe he'd make a more convincing case if the audience had a parasocial relationship with one of the cast, and participated in their murder. there is a blurring of the fourth wall boundary.

anyway.................................................. obviously I haven't worked out all the plot details (lol I say, as if I'll actually write this) but I just think keebo killing someone would have opened up a lot of ideas worth exploring. also yes, I am a fan of fics where shuichi is whumped, but there is plot relevance to it here!!! it really is a missed opportunity to not explore parasocial relationships in a V3 context!!!!

do I want to write a V3 fic or am I just really fixated on it atm

[kyuuppi]

Personal Duties

Pairing: Xiao x Reader (gn)

Contents: ...fluff ig?

Word Count: 2.8k

The morning had begun uneventfully, giving no hint to how strange of a day it would inevitably become.

You had risen with the sun, as usual, and taken the time to double check the contents of your inventory before leaving for Liyue harbor. On the way you stopped by Wanmin restaurant for a simple skewer, returning Chef Mao’s enthusiastic greetings as you indulged in the quick breakfast. He rattled on about a few new recipes he wanted to try, insisting that you would be the one to sample them before they became an official part of the menu, and his beloved daughter’s latest adventures in Springvale. Chef Mao was always rather talkative but he was kind and one of the first locals you had become friends with when you first arrived in Liyue.

You finish the meal quickly and thank him before continuing your short journey. As you walked through the open streets of the harbor you breathed in the freshness of the sea, salty and foreign but comforting in the way only a land as mysterious as Liyue could feel. Despite having only lived in the city for a few months, you feel at peace here, safely cradled between mountains tall enough to break through the clouds, dotted by qingxin flowers that seemed to sparkle in the evenings after a good rainfall. The first day you arrived in Liyue you were left speechless, awestruck by both the vastness of the natural valleys and mountain ranges as well as the crumbling ancient ruins scattered across the lands, telling of a time you had only read about as a child in your faded copy of Records of Jueyen. The locals immediately recognized you as an outsider but offered nothing but hospitality, providing useful advice or large discounts on some of their finest products. Thoroughly enamored, you had immediately decided you would stay in Liyue for as long as you could. That same night you had rented a modest room at the highly regarded Wangshu Inn, a decision that cascaded into several life-changing events, including the meeting of a certain long-term resident and fabled legend of the inn: adeptus Xiao.

Meeting and then even befriending Xiao could be described as nothing short of a miracle. Meeting him has been unexpected—an accident really—in which you foolishly ventured to the vacant top floor of the inn in the middle of the night and nearly fell to your death trying to lean over the railing for a better view. Xiao had, very reluctantly, saved your life in that moment, gripping your upper arm firmly the second you realized your weight was tipping forwards. When you looked back to meet his gaze he had advised you, quite harshly, not to be so careless before vanishing without another word.

Naturally, your interests were immediately piqued and you sought out more information about the mystery man on the top floor of Wangshu Inn who could conveniently blip in and out of existence.

Most of the locals provided minimal information aside from a few rumors and the story of a masked figure told by the owner of Second Life. Piecing together snippets of information from locals and a few of the tales you remember from books, you were able to conclude that the man who saved you was not a man at all and rather the revered conqueror of demons and vigilant yaksha, Xiao.

The most useful source of information, however, turned out to be Wangshu’s very own boss, Verr Goldet. While the woman was hesitant to reveal anything at first, she eventually opened up at your persistence to the point it almost felt as if she wanted you to make progress with the adeptus more than you did.

“Rumor has it he becomes a little more friendly when he is presented with a fresh helping of almond tofu,” she had suggested not so subtly one evening.

You had happily taken the hint, pestering Smiley Yanxiao to teach you how to make the delicate dish before taking said dish to the top balcony as an offering of thanks to Xiao.

Expectedly, Xiao did not appear at all that night but you were nothing if not persistent. You returned with a fresh plate of almond tofu every night that week until on the seventh day, as you were nearly dozing off while leaning on the rail, Xiao finally revealed himself to you, if only to ask if you were trying to make a repeat of your near death experience from last time. He claimed he wouldn’t save you a second time but the way his eyes sparkled when he finally received your plate of almond tofu made you think he was bluffing.

After that night, your relationship with the adeptus rapidly developed. You found yourself on the top floor of Wangshu Inn every night, Xiao obediently appearing a safe distance beside you even if he liked to pretend you didn’t exist or that your presence annoyed him. The fact he still showed up and, as evident by the occasional question he would ask in the midst of your chattering, actually listened , was enough for you. He did not share much about himself but you understood well enough that his life was not without significant hardship or suffering and, if nothing else, you liked to think you could at least offer a small distraction to the hardworking yaksha.

“Ad astra abyssosque! Welcome to the Adventurers' Guild,” Katheryne greets as you finally arrive at her desk.

You return your own greeting before discussing the details of the day’s commissions.

It would be an uneventful day, you quickly gather. Two of your assignments are merely deliveries: a mother near Dongsheng’s general good shop needs her daughter to take her medicine but the little girl refuses unless there is a fresh plate of almond tofu to eat it with and a letter addressed to Granny Chu in Gulli Plains that need to be delivered. The third assignment is a complaint about a particularly rowdy group of hilichurls close to the main road. Lastly, a small clan of treasure hoarders seem to have stolen one of Jifang’s most prized artifacts.

Reasoning to yourself that a day of boring commissions is likely better than a day of dangerous commissions, you set off.

You finish the first two assignments rather quickly, as expected. The little girl had excitedly complimented your almond tofu several times, swearing it to be the best thing she had ever eaten while her mother profusely thanked you for getting the girl to finally take her medicine. Likewise, Granny Chu had immediately brightened the second you handed her the small envelope, explaining it was a message from her grandchildren who seemed too busy with their own families to stay in contact very often. The elderly woman insisted you took a couple of ripe sunsettia as thanks for delivering the letter before you were once more setting off, prepared to face the rambunctious cluster of Hilichurls.

It is then that your uneventful day takes a turn.

While hiking through the marsh on the way, you quickly notice how disturbed the land looks, barren of the common lizards, loaches, and small mammals that usually occupy the lands, scurrying away the moment you step too close. Instead, patches of bare land break up the once lush and seamless grass, jagged cuts along the blades as if a strong force had ripped through them. Evidence of chipped cobblestone and patchy grass seem to only get worse as you approach your destination and a small part of you feels anxious, wondering if the camp of hilichurls will be much more powerful than you had expected. Subconsciously, you grip your claymore a little tighter as you walk, glancing around cautiously as if you could be ambushed at any moment.

Instead of a rowdy group of fearsome monsters, you are met with empty space when you reach the location Katheryne had described. The air is eerily quiet aside from the soft chirps of distant cricadas, not a hilichurl in sight as you slowly survey the area. You almost would have assumed you had misheard and went to the wrong place if it were not for the obvious evidence of a large group of hilichurls once residing there. Shoddily built wooden huts and tilted towers surround the open space, the structures seeming barely able to support themselves as half of them had been caved in or ripped apart as if by a tornado. Strewn across the ground near the unlit campfires lie various meats, vegetables, and wheat. A few water pots and cauldrons lay tipped over but still partially filled with water as if they were being used mere hours ago.

Someone had clearly exterminated this hilichurl camp before your arrival, not even bothering to rummage through the chests, undoubtedly filled with valuable treasures, sitting in the far corner of the camp.

You are far from the only adventurer in Liyue. There are others, many of which are stronger and more skilled than you, who are assigned similar and even more dangerous commissions, taking down hilichurl camps like this on the daily. However, Katheryne always keeps meticulous records of who the guild assigns to do what and, in your five years as an adventurer, mistakes made by the adventure guild are almost unheard of. Surely Katheryne didn’t assign you to a task someone else was already assigned to—but then, who would complete something as tedious as clearing a hilichurl camp without seeking the rewards the adventure guild offers, or even the unguarded chests around the camp?

None of it makes sense to you but the sun is already beginning to set and you still have an assignment to deal with treasure hoarders on the opposite side one the city. Reluctantly, you take advantage of the untouched chests and pick up anything of value you find among the wreckage of the camp, not a single hilichurl body in sight.

The oddity of your last commission is nearly forgotten by the time you reach the treasure hoarders’ hideout, chest slightly heaving and thighs burning from hours of hiking through the uneven terrain. Above you, the sky has already turned a deep lavender, a speckle of stars glittering above the mountain peaks. You lean against a large rock at the entrance of the valley, too tired to even consider the glittering tangerine of cor lapis peeking out between the rocks. It is in that moment, as you are catching your breath, that you catch the murmurs of male voices carried with the wind.

“Look—I think that’s them…!”

“A-are you sure? If we mess this up that m-masked man might come back and…”

You abruptly straighten up, brows furrowing at the words and fearful tone of the voices. Why did they sound so afraid? Was it because of this “masked man?” The only masked man you can think of is...

“Just hurry up and give it to them so we can get the hell out of here!”

You are startled into a fighting stance at the sound of footsteps coming towards you.

Finally, a small group of burly men round the corner of the large rock you were just resting against, all wearing the familiar variations of martial arts or farming clothing and masks synonymous with treasure hoarders in Liyue. To your surprise however, rather than angry or smug as the hoarders usually looked, the men before you all appear disheveled and wide eyed, some even visibly trembling as if they’d seen a ghost. All look at you with wide eyes, as if you personally had struck the fear of the archons within them. The largest man, who you presume to be their leader, steps forward and you take a cautious step back, raising your blade in defense.

“No, wait—we don’t want to fight you,” the man quickly says, causing you to furrow your brows in skepticism.

“H-here, this is all of it, we swear!”

You fumble when the man throws a large bag at you, nearly dropping your sword to catch it. The bag itself is unassuming, a brown and slightly stained burlap sack, but you can already guess the contents based on the weight and clunky shape. Glancing up you find the men all staring at you expectantly, seemingly awaiting your approval as if their life depended on it.

Cautiously, you open the bag, finding a single blue and silver goblet inside along with a few bird’s feathers and a silver cricket lined with jewels—Jifang’s stolen artifacts.

“Y-ya see? It’s all there! We learned our lesson—we promise we’ll never steal again,” one of the men stammers, the group already stepping back as if ready to bolt.

“Wait a second—” you try, stepping forward.

To your shock the men startle like wild animals, recoiling from you as if you’ll attack them at any moment.

“H-here, take these too,” one of the men in the back shouts, throwing down a bronze coin. You immediately recognize it as a treasure hoarder’s insignia—something a hoarder only gives up if they have been defeated in battle. And yet, soon all of the men are throwing their own down as well, letting them land around your feet like an offering before the men all turn heel and abruptly book it, running down hill as if an evil spirit were hot on their tails despite your calls.

Thoroughly baffled by the whole exchange you crouch down to pick up the tokens—that is when you realize the land looks familiar. The same patchiness and jagged cuts plague the grass here as it did the hilichurl camp you had seen earlier. In fact, the pattern felt familiar to something you had seen only a few times before: the aftermath of a particularly powerful anemo used by a particularly powerful masked “man”...

“Xiao!”

Your voice echoes slightly around the wooden hallway as you stumble your way to the top balcony, eager to confront the adeptus. Your chest is heaving as you attempt to catch your breath, having practically ran all the way to Wangshu Inn from Liyue harbor after hastily collecting your commission rewards.

The air is silent for a few moments, the only sound coming from your own harsh breaths before a calm, deep voice startles you from behind.

You whip around to face him.

“You’re so noisy, ” Xiao complains, arms crossed and expression mildly annoyed.

While the greeting would be hardly encouraging under any normal circumstance, you feel you have grown close enough to Xiao to understand his words hold no true malice—or perhaps you’re just really good at ignoring it.

“Xiao,” you repeat much more calmly than before. You eye him cautiously as you speak your next words, trying to gauge his reaction.

“What did you do today?”

His expression gives nothing away, remaining neutral and closed off—unreadable—as he replies monotonously.

“The work of the adepti is not something mortals could ever understand nor need to know.”

You resist the urge to roll your eyes at the typical, very Xiao-like response.

“Well did you happen to decimate any hilichurl camps in the Dihua Marsh? Or mentally scar any treasure hoarders around Jueyen Karst? The hilichurl camp I was supposed to take down was already gone when I got there and the treasure hoarders I talked to were acting really weird—there was also a lot of collateral damage. It almost felt like someone was sabotaging my commissions…”

Xiao’s expression promptly sours, seeming slightly offended by your unspoken accusation.

“I have no interest in the work of an adventurer, ” he spits out, the word itself seeming to leave a bad taste in his mouth, “I am dedicated to my adept duties, nothing more and nothing less.”

Xiao speaks in a way that leaves no room for protest and you finally give up with a small sigh, turning away from him to gaze over the view from the balcony instead. It was true—there would be no reason for Xiao to trouble himself with doing your dumb little daily commissions when he faces much larger, more powerful monsters on the daily. Moreover, why would Xiao target you specifically? As much as you like to think you’re special, you’re really just one of many humans and Xiao does not seem like the type to hold personal vendettas or enjoy watching people suffer. It was foolish to even think he had anything to do with what happened today, you mentally scold yourself.

Despite the summer season, a cool breeze rustles through your hair and clothing, encouraging your shoulders to release a tension you didn’t even realize you had. Your smile at the calmness of the night, oblivious to the watchful eye of the adeptus next to you.

His duty as an adeptus is to defend the people of Liyue but somehow along the way ensuring your protection has become a personal duty he takes very seriously.

[write-like-wright]

Hiiiii for the halloween monsterfucker feast could I get some uhmm... Herlock × succubus fem reader porn? Thank you very much <3

Pairing: Herlock Sholmes x (third person POV) succubus!female reader

Warnings: smut, rituals gone wrong (or right, depending how you look at it), dub-con for a moment

Wordcount: 725

For all intents and purposes, Herlock Sholmes was a man of (admittedly questionable) science who did not believe in anything not of this world. When Iris suggested performing a ritual late that Halloween, he'd scoffed, agreeing only to indulge her childish whims. As expected, nothing happened, no spirits or demons stepping out of their shoddily drawn pentagram. Iris retreated to her room with a sigh, visibly disappointed. Herlock tried to comfort her to the best of his abilities, confused as to why she'd be upset about not summoning the harbinger of doom. Teenagers are strange, he concluded, stepping into his own dark bedroom. Even more strange was the sight that greeted him in that very room.

Herlock blinked once, twice, eyeing the strange figure before his eyes. There was a naked woman on his bed, smiling wickedly, her eyes beckoning him closer. "What are you doing here?" If the stranger was going to be so impolite to, well, pose nude on his bed, Herlock thought he may as well be rude himself, the tone of his voice harsh, biting. The woman grinned, revealing her sharp teeth, making Herlock stumble backwards, suddenly aware of the apparition's inhuman appearance. The horns which he originally thought a part of an elaborate costume were clearly too realistic to be just that and when she rose a pair of bat-like wings protruded from her back.

"Was I not just summoned here, pretty boy?" She tutted, walking towards him to place one unusually warm hand on his cheek. Herlock shivered, stumbling backwards until he was seated on the edge of his desk. He had many things to say and even more things to ask, but none would leave his tongue-tied mouth. "Do you know what I am?" The woman asked, her hand trailing down his neck, setting his nerves on fire. He nodded. During his extensive research, he'd skimmed through a book or two on folklore and demonology, acquiring superficial knowledge on otherworldly beings, thinking them nothing more than stories to scare children into behaving. Apparently, he was wrong.

"Then, you know what I'm here for?" Herlock nodded again, suddenly aware of her proximity and the curves suddenly an inch away from his face. A blush crept up his neck, heat jolting through his entire body. He could feel his cock hardening against his trousers almost instantly. It had been years since he'd been this close to another person, if he could call the apparition standing before him that. His body was eager, even if his mind had its doubts. "Do you consent?" She asked, lifting his chin to look at her. Before he could stop himself, a "yes" slipped out of his mouth, sounding infinitely more sure than he felt. She grinned then, pulling him into a kiss to seal the deal.

When she pulled back, Herlock discovered his clothing had vanished, no doubt through the use of some succubi magic. The woman straddled him, lining his cock with her entrance and sinking down in one quick stroke. It was unlike anything he'd felt with a fellow human - the demoness' stamina was otherworldly, the speed she moved at enough to make the desk beneath him shake, and the way her walls squeezed his shaft made stars dance behind his eyes. Suddenly, he found himself grateful for the fact he agreed to the silly impromptu ritual, already making mental plans to repeat the process sometime in the very near future, preferably when he was alone.

He finished twice, her tight walls milking release after release from his painfully hard cock. She pulled away once she'd had her fill, thanking him for the sustenance. Herlock couldn't help but blush once more, watching the woman's naked body suddenly transform, clothes that would even be too inappropriate for the beach appearing on her form. "W-Wait," he'd choked out finally once she'd started chanting some words, sensing she was about to leave. "I want to know more about you- your kind, your world, everything!" She laughed then. "I must be going now, handsome. If you want to see me again... you know how to find me, and the price to pay for my presence." With a flash, she was gone, leaving Herlock dumbfounded, alone and naked in the dark room, mentally listing all the questions he had for his visitor next time he summoned her.

[merryfortune]

Spectre was surprised to see it. A collection of newspaper clippings on the surface of the refridgerator in the kitchen. So far, of what he had explored inside the mansion, there wasn’t clutter. There weren’t any items tardy to where they ought to be. Everything was big. Sleek. New.

The refridgerator no exception, shiny and black underneath the fluttering newspaper clippings.

He approached. Unsure if he would get in trouble or not. Back in the orphanage, snacks were prohibited outside of assigned snacktimes, the matrons going even so far as locking the refridgerator. This one was unguarded, save for the newspaper clippings which had just begun to fray and yellow.

He looked up at them and he saw big eyes staring back at him. His eyes. He blinked. He squinted to read them but they were all shoddily put together, overlapping and from various sources. His stomach turned.

Spectre knew a couple big words. Deforestation, chemical herbicide, and faminine, for example. He could impress some adults sometimes by using those words and better yet, using them correctly. But he didn’t know the word for obituary but he did, instinctually, know what obituary meant. A retelling of a life now gone and lost. Not mourned, reading these words, his short life of six years was not mourned. Merely announced to have ended for the morbid fascination of the public masses.

So that’s why the matrons didn’t want him asking any questions. They had thought he had died. Death by... misadventure, body not found. That was a phrase repeated through the dozens of clippings.

But what Spectre didn’t understand was why the Kogami Mansion had so many newspaper clippings about him. From what he could discern, none of the other victims were present. Their stories of their vanishings. Why... Why was his different? The job of hiding his disappearance made easier because the matrons had prematurely and errorneously concluded that he was dead?

His heart thumped in his chest, his blood droned in his ears. The ensuing nervousness was all encompassing. The dread, too. He didn’t even notice that Ryoken and Kyoko had found him in the kitchen, staring at the refridgerator, not in hunder but in a peculiar vulnerability.

“Spectre?” Ryoken prompted him and Spectre blinked.

He finally heard something over the machinations of his body. He turned his head and there was an awry teardrop hanging by a thread on the edge of his eye. He had been abandoned all over again. It shouldn’t have hurted. Not this time. Not when he had run away of his own volition because his dear Mother had been murdered but it still hurt. He trembled.

Kyoko moved quicker than Ryoken to hug and coddle the boy. She put her hands around his shoulders, stroked his hair and nuzzled his face. Spectre didn’t react. He was frozen, his eyes searching for Ryoken but again, the adult took the reins of this situation.

“I’m sorry.” Kyoko said. “We intentionally blocked all information regarding the Project, except for stories about you because we felt sorry for you. We didn’t have to lift a finger to hide you, I’m so sorry.”

Kyoko hugged Spectre tighter as he managed to breathe out a question, “But why?”

Why in what way? Even Spectre didn’t know. He didn’t think the Project had been that sorryful. He knew himself a pitiful creature, an unwanted baby, but the Project had given him so much meaning, why be sorry? But why also keep those newspaper clippings? Spectre’s child mouth just on the cusp of articulating that but instead he hugged Kyoko tighter. She smelt like perfume.

“We wanted a keepsake to prove that you mattered. If not to them, but to us. You were one of our experiments, we had a distance to keep, you were number four, not that boy from the orphanage but we wanted to prove you mattered becuase your instincts were right. Sharp. What you were doing, it was important. It mattered.” Kyoko said.

Ryoken inched closer and he piled onto the hug as well, “You still do matter, Spectre.”

Spectre began to bawl. Kyoko patted his back and Ryoken hugged him tighter as well.

“And now, since your here, to stay,” Kyoko murmured, “let’s make you a scrapbook, with the newsclippings. And, let’s take photos of you. Plenty of photos, yeah?”

“Huh? why?” Spectre’s voice was thick in his tears.

Kyoko pulled back, so did Ryoken, “Because all important kids have photobooks, duh.” Ryoken tried to joke but he, too, sounded squashed with emotions too big for his body, trying to hide tears on his cheeks but they were slick and shiny, even in the dim, artistically minimal lighting of the kitchen.

“Oh.” Spectre replied, his expression lighting up. “Thank you.”

“Your welcome.” Kyoko bade him and she stroked the back of Spectre’s head one more time.

[words-writ-in-starlight]

Thank you so much for the graphic you shared about gender identity, with umbrellas (different anon). For about 1-2 years I've felt like I might be nonbinary -- it actually started when I read a sci-fi book about a world where there were men, women, people of a third gender, and people with no gender, and everyone was allowed to choose/figure it out at their own pace -- and I thought, "Wow, that sounds wonderful." And thoughts expanded from there. Sometimes I worry I'm making it up, though.

HERE’S THE DEAL, ANON

Actually there are three discrete deals, but here they are.

First of all, the question I always remind people to ask is--why would you be making it up?  People make up things about their own identity for some kind of concrete benefit--if I decide to pass as cis, I’m doing it to protect myself on some level.  So what would the benefit be?  If you can’t think of one, maybe you’re not making it up.  Trust yourself, sweetheart.  If you doubt your own heart so much that you don’t believe that you know what sounds wonderful to you, then you may want to speak to someone about that.  My guess is, though, that you just--don’t feel quite allowed.  I feel you.  It took me years to feel like I was allowed to call myself trans, and I needed to be kindly lectured by a stranger at Comic Con before I was able to get past that.  So, here’s permission.  You’re allowed.  Try some stuff out!  Experiment in small ways!  See what feels good to you, what brings you joy!  Trust yourself and take that joy when you find it!

Second of all, hell, listen, even if you try out whatever “being nonbinary” means to you and you go “hm, no, I actually don’t like this,” then...so what?  What’s the problem?  You’re not signing your life away to whatever gender you experiment with.  You concluding you’re actually a trans man, or a demigirl, or that you’re just straight up cis and sometimes like to play around with how you present--none of that is hurting anyone.  You’re not invalidating the existence of anyone else.  You just tried something out and discovered it didn’t feel right and tried something different.  Gender isn’t a lifetime contract, it’s a nice jacket.  If you try it on in the store, you don’t have to buy it.  If you buy it, you can return it.  You can have nine jackets.  You can have no jackets.  It’s no one else’s problem how many jackets you have, or how long you try them out for.

And third, it is completely okay for you to take as much time as you need to figure out your own self.  It’s hard to figure yourself out!  Sometimes it’s a little scary, or a lot scary!  Sometimes you have other shit to do!  I distinctly remember starting my sophomore year of college and being halfway through a homework assignment when my brain very helpfully stopped doing biology and said, “You’re trans, you’ve never felt like a woman in your life even if I haven’t decided what the endgame is, and someday you might want to deal with that.”  

And I set down my pencil and took some deep breaths and responded with, “Maybe so, brain, but honestly what I need to deal with right now is passing Cellular Biology because I fast-talked my way out of the intro classes, so how about we come back to this in a couple of years?”  Said it out loud to my empty dorm room and everything.  And went back to my damn homework.

And then I proceeded to Not Deal With It for the rest of college!  I just!  Didn’t!  I didn’t interrogate anything about gender and I played the same shoddily constructed Star (Woman Edition) role I’d done my whole life and told everyone I was cis and finished my degree.  And by the time I’d finished my degree I’d kind of gotten used to my brain putting on the Check Gender light every once in a while, so I cut all my hair off, got rid of all my dresses, stopped wearing heels, bought some binders and waistcoats, and explained the term “nonbinary” to my parents, over the course of about six months.

Sometimes shit takes time.  Sit with it for as long as you need to.  Try on some jackets.  All your enby siblings are still going to be here and thrilled to have you when you’re ready.

[the-wlw-cafe]

Supercorptober 2020 - Day 3: Dancing

Read it on ao3 here!

“May I have this dance?” For several moments, Lena was sure she must have misheard. The voice clearly belonged to a woman, a woman asking her to dance, in front of the entire assembled bourgeoisie of National City. A madwoman, clearly – such things were unheard of, and if the involved parties wanted to be able to show their face again among the nobility, they were to be kept that way.

OR

Lena gets whisked away by a dashing stranger who asks too many questions. But it takes two to tango, and Lena is determined to show this stranger that she knows the steps just as well as her.

The masks truly afforded nothing but the barest pretence of anonymity. Lena could easily make out her brother, donning the mask of a snarling golden dragon in his incomparable ego, surrounding himself with the easily impressed and delighting in their awe and gawking as he presented them with tales of his daring conquest of Krypton, and all the treasure and wondrous inventions found in the ransacked cities. Even more apparent was Morgan Edge, whom she identified in a matter of minutes by the way he couldn’t wrench his eyes away from her cleavage for three consecutive seconds. Still, the invited to the annual masquerade ball conducted themselves with the self-assured gracelessness of men and women absolutely convinced none of their behaviour could ever be traced back to them.

Lex, their gracious host for the evening, had often told her she would learn to enjoy these balls soon enough, but while it was entertaining to watch the National City nobility make fools of themselves as wine flowed in biblical quantities, Lena quickly found herself bored of trading empty platitudes and trying to dodge the wandering hands of rich old men emboldened by alcohol or her brother’s sycophants tripping over themselves to praise his warmongering and genocidal exploits beyond the border in hopes of ingratiating themselves with the Luthors. With the years she’d developed a strategy in avoiding such situations, and it consisted mostly of always making herself seem as inapproachable as humanly possible, adding an aggressive snap to her steps as if she was continuously running late for something, venom to her words and disdain to her voice. It was not a mask she enjoyed wearing, but one necessary nonetheless.

Unfortunately Edge was not so easy to deter. She could see him stalking towards her, palms open in what he must have believed was an appeasing gesture. She began scanning the room for a quick route of egress, but found every way blocked by chattering groups of drunks, when suddenly -

“May I have this dance?”

For several moments, Lena was sure she must have misheard. The voice clearly belonged to a woman, a woman asking her to dance, in front of the entire assembled bourgeoisie of National City. A madwoman, clearly – such things were unheard of, and if the involved parties wanted to be able to show their face again among the nobility, they were to be kept that way. Still, she had to admire the woman’s bravery. It’s not like she hadn’t dreamt about it when she was younger and more naive, in the contrary, she’d spent many nights wishing herself away from a family, imagining a dashing girl to whisk her away into an adventure. But those idle dreams were for children, and Lena had long since accepted that the closest thing to love she could attain were quick fumblings in backrooms and dark hallways. It was a reality of life – a reality that the stranger apparently couldn’t yet accept.

Though she doubted he’d heard a word of what she said, the madwoman’s arrival had given Edge pause, but out of the corner of her eye she could see him pick up the pace towards her again, and in this moment, Lena was ready for any excuse to be out of his reach.

“Absolutely, I insist”, she answered, and let herself be lead to the dance floor. The music was barely audible over the laughter and conversations, most couples long since having abandoned dancing for a walk in the gardens, and the almost inevitably following roll in the hay. The woman started softly swaying them to the rhythm of the music, not especially gracefully, but Lena had seen far worse from her peers.

Now that the immediate danger of Edge accosting her had been staved off, Lena allowed herself her first look at her saviour. She immediately knew she’d never seen her before – masked or not, she was sure she would never forget a personality such as hers. Fittingly for someone as foolishly courageous, she had chosen the mask of a lion, long blond hair framing it perfectly like a mane. Even more perplexing (and, if Lena was honest with herself, alluring) was the fact that she had forgone a dress in favour of a simple, yet elegant frock coat with red and golden accents. Lena bit back a smile as she felt the lioness preen under Lena’s slow appraisal.

“My, my, aren’t you quite the scandal?”, she purred.

“I thought embracing scandal under the guise of anonymity was the whole point of a masquerade ball.”

Lena couldn’t hold back an airy laugh. “That much is true. Though I do greatly prefer your interpretation of scandal over the interpretations of the rest of the guests. So far, you haven’t even tried to touch my arse.”

The calm and collected veneer of her partner was immediately ruined as she reflexively dragged her hand a few inches higher from the perfectly tame spot on her back where it had been resting, leading Lena through the dance with nothing but the gentlest of pressure.

“I would never!” the lioness sputtered, honest affront at the mere notion tinting every syllable.

Lena cocked her head to the side, lost in thought.

“You truly wouldn’t”, she murmured, more to herself than to the blonde. Watching over her shoulder, she could see Lex, staring at her from across the room with barely concealed rage. Lena knew he could recognize her just as well as she could recognize him, and she hoped he could also sense her smirk under her black raven mask as she pulled her partner closer and quickened their steps, her lioness matching her tempo after just a moment of stumbling. After all the times her family had made sure she knew what a disgrace she was to the Luthor name, it was high time she, as the blonde had so precisely put it, embraced a little scandal.

The lioness spun them around once, and too late Lena noticed her partner surreptitiously following the direction of her gaze to where Lex was still watching them, the wine glass in his hand now shaking with fury.

“It seems that Lord Luthor has taken quite an interest in you”, she stated.

Lena could feel herself tense at these words, suspicion worming its way through the sense of safety she’d felt with the stranger.

“How did you know it was him?”

“Who else would move with such self-importance and display his wealth so publicly than our gracious host? And”, she added, a smug smile evident in her voice, “if it wasn’t him, why would you have reacted so strongly?”

Lena could kick herself for giving herself away so easily. She didn’t give the stranger the satisfaction of an answer, partly out of pride, and partly to choose her next words carefully as to not repeat her mistake.

“All of which makes me wonder”, the blonde concluded, “who you are to have vexed him so?”

She punctuated her statement by dropping Lena into a dip that had her heart stutter and breath hitch, held up only by one single, strong, secure hand between her shoulder blades. She swallowed, as her throat had suddenly gone very dry.

“Only moments ago it was you who was lecturing me on the advantages of anonymity”, she replied, clasping the other woman’s upper arm to regain some sense of stability. As her fingers brushed the fabric of her frock coat, she came upon something strange: She noticed a seam at the shoulder coming apart. No true noblewoman would wear clothes old or shoddily crafted enough to rip during a social gathering. Now that she was paying attention to it, there were more and more irregularities that caught her eye. The coat was slightly ill-fitting, the buttons straining just the tiniest bit against the lioness’ broad chest, and the rim of her mask was chipped just below the jaw.

“It seems we both have something to gain from it”, Lena teased, wrapping the loose thread around her finger and ripping it off with one abrupt motion, making sure her partner knew she knew.

“It seems we both have something to hide”, the woman acquiesced. Lena snorted.

“I’m a woman who enjoys dancing with other women, what don’t I have to hide?”

“You enjoy dancing with me?”

That much was obvious. It was no use beating around the bush, and while she wasn’t certain whether the racing of her pulse was owed more to the company she found herself in or the fact that her partner seemed entirely to perceptive for comfort, or, as was most likely the case, a mixture of the two, she liked it. She liked their little cat and mouse game, she wanted to see how far it could go, where it could lead them.

“If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have given you the time of the day”, she whispered, making sure to brush her hand over the slight swell of the lioness’ biceps and delighting in the way she audibly swallowed and missed a step in their dance.

“I’m honoured”, her partner murmured, unmistakable arousal adding a deep timbre to her voice.

“As you should be”, Lena smirked, wrapping a leg around her waist and trusting that the lioness’ strong arms would keep her balanced. In their next breakneck spin she caught another quick glance at Lex, but this time he wasn’t alone. He was bent over to none other than Edge, who was very obviously pointing at them while ranting about something. As soon as they noticed her watching them they got up, moving quickly toward her. Shit. She needed to get out of here, fast. She leaned in close to her partner.

“Would you like me to show you the gardens?”

It was an obvious code phrase. Being shown the gardens might have been the express goal in attending the ball for a lot of the attendees, but Lena was willing to bet none of them were botanical enthusiasts. She had no intention of following through with her bold promise, while she enjoyed the chase, she didn’t like the thought of baring herself to this total stranger with a knack for asking too many questions, in every sense of the word. She didn’t fear the lioness wouldn’t take no for an answer, despite her obvious interest. But to her surprise, her partner took a step back, a few hand widths of distance between their chests that previously had almost been touching.

“I...I don’t think that would be a good idea”, she said, adamantly refusing to meet her gaze.

Objectively, Lena knew that her refusal didn’t really matter, not when the offer she made wasn’t even genuine, but the obvious rejection still felt like someone had doused her with a bucket of icy water.

“Thank you for the dance”, the lioness added, her voice strangely hoarse, bowed stiffly and turned to leave.

“Wait!”

Lena hadn’t meant to exclaim so loudly, several people turning their heads towards her made her insides churn with embarrassment. She took the lioness by the hand and pulling her close, making a show of caressing her cheek for the onlookers before leaning in once more and whispering in her ear: “Our gracious host after me.” She swallowed her pride like a bitter pill and added: “Please.”

The lioness stood there for a second, frozen, before a steady hand found the small of Lena’s back.

“Lead the way.”

She took the lioness by the hand and together they dodged and weaved through the masses, most of them readily making space after the scene they’d made. It was dark outside, here and there the muffled noises of amorous couples were audible through the song of the cicadas. She tugged her onwards, into the bushes that framed the pebble paths where they ducked down into the shadows, waiting. They saw Lex emerge, stalking along the paths like a featherless vulture, but Lena was sure he would not venture too deep into the gardens. Sure, there was no telling what retribution awaited Lena tomorrow, for potentially bringing dishonour on the entire Luthor family for her public dalliance with this stranger that defied all notions of etiquette and morality, but in this moment, huddled together with her lioness, painfully aware of the fact that she had not yet let go of her hand, she found that she only regret she had was not being able to see her brother’s face.

“Well”, she giggled (giggled! She couldn’t remember the last time she’d done that), once she was sure Lex was gone, “Look at you, a perfect stranger whisking me away to an adventure. I must say, I’ve never had this much excitement at one of these odious balls.”

Her lioness was quiet for a while, and anxiety began to rear its ugly head in Lena’s mind as she began fretting over whether she’d been too familiar. Then, the other woman heaved a sigh so great Lena could see her deflate.

“Lena…”

It didn’t come as a shock to her, not really. She knew the lioness was perceptive and intelligent, on some level she’d suspected she knew of her identity. The thought of a stranger knowing her name while she knew nothing, nothing at all about her in return still made her queasy with unease.

“You know my name.” It wasn’t a question.

“You know I don’t belong here.”

“So I suppose we are at an impassé?”

The lioness was silent for a few more seconds, then she spoke again:

“Lena, my intentions with you haven’t been...honest. My sister will have my head for telling you this, but, the truth is that I infiltrated the ball with one goal in mind: I wanted to confront your brother, and…”

Her fingers slipped out of Lena’s, and instead she took hold of her shoulders, as if she was imploring her, begging for something – mercy, forgiveness, anything that had never been Lena’s to give.

“Lena, I wanted to kill him.”

So she was a madwoman after all.

“Have you lost your mind?” she hissed, still mindful of whoever might be out there overhearing this conversation they’d both be executed for. Lena doubted Lex would shed a tear, after tonight, he might in fact be glad for the excuse.

The reaction of the lioness was instantaneous, recoiling as if Lena’s skin had burned her, hands that had been clawing at her gown dropping limply at her sides.

“In front of National City’s entire upper class? You’d be dragged off to jail before you’d even cleaned the blade of his blood! Don’t think you’d be seeing any mercy from them, they all profiteer off of his warmongering! You’d be lucky if you’d even get as much as a mock trial, instead of being murdered before you’d get the chance to see the light of day again -”

“I don’t care!”

Stunned silence was her answer. She’d shouted the words with such conviction, with such disregard to her own fate. Even in her darkest moments there’d always been a voice inside Lena that had forced her to carry on, if not for her own sake or for the dwindling hope of better days, then just out of pure spite.

“I don’t care”, the lioness said again, all the fire having left her voice, looking so incredibly small now. “He took everything from me. I don’t care what it takes, I need to make sure he can’t hurt anyone else. When I asked you to dance tonight, it was for the sole purpose of getting closer to him, closer to my goal, but when you accepted...I forgot everything else for just a few minutes.”

Muffled sniffles were audible under the blonde’s mask now, and Lena felt the sudden urge to reach out to her, to comfort her.

“And a part of me resents you for it because this, us, is something I desperately want but I know I can never truly have. As long as he is still alive I know I can never be at peace.”

“It sounds like we have a common enemy then”, Lena said, with as secure a voice as she could muster.

“Lena, you can’t possibly -”

“Mean that? The Luthors have tormented me since my father forced them to take me in. But that hardly matters. Don’t you see this is bigger than just Lex? Every single person you’ve seen donning a mask today have a vested interest in continuing his conquest, even if he isn’t their figurehead anymore. You could – we could change everything, together, if you don’t throw away your shot with one rash decision tonight.”

“You’d be hunted. Your life would never return back to normal.”

“Good. I hope so. This entire time I’ve waited for some opportunity, for someone to take my hand and lead me, when in reality all I needed to do was take the plunge.”

Another silence stretched on, and Lena’s competitive side couldn’t help but feel a little pride at the fact that this time it was her who had stunned the other woman. Then, quietly at first, she started to laugh, until her entire frame was shaking.

“My sister is definitely going to kill me”, she managed between sobs of laughter. Then, in one fluid movement, she pulled the mask from her face, a cascade of blonde hair framing a face more beautiful than any other Lena had seen, blue eyes glimmering with tears of both sorrow and laughter holding her stare.

“My name is Kara Zor-El, and I am the last daughter of Krypton.”

[symflash]

Just wishful thinking, but we could petition Marvel to actually bring us a story that concludes this whole thing with Peter/Spidey and the symbiotes. Unless it's against the creators' wishes, which I doubt very much, we could help making it happen.

“The rights holders will have no problem with a bunch of random fans taking control of the franchise” is super-duper-ultra-hyper wishful thinking.

What continuity are we even talking about here? USM? They’re not gonna bring back an older series that was concluded with a definitive finale, when there’s a new incompatible cartoon playing that’s raking them in money. The six -year-old boys that whine for their parents to buy them Spider-Man merchandise are the primary audience that Disney/Marvel is interested in, and that’s also the same audience that’s going to be confused why Peter suddenly has a new hairstyle, new friends and goes to a different school. They’re not gonna risk that just to write one (1) story about symbiotes.

MSM? Season 3 will apparently have a bunch of symbiotes, but the series has already made the statement “the Venom symbiote is wrong and evil for lashing out at the people that imprisoned it in a jar for years and tortured it”, so I highly doubt there will be any symbiote sympathies there.

Comics? The Venom run is currently being written by Donny Cates, who shoddily retconned Eddie Brock’s entire 30 year history so he could turn the symbiote into an abusive manipulative monster.

Why do you think I’m so obsessed with USM? It ended with two symbiotes getting a happily ever after, with hosts that care for them and don’t fall to “the only good symbiote is a docile brain-dead symbiote that can be used as an object” pitfall (I’m looking at you, Remender era Agent Venom). It’s literally unique in the entire Marvel multiverse.

But most importantly, it ENDED. That means no 30-something edgelord who keeps writing women dying to cope with his divorce can come in and take it away from me. I am free to assume that Flash, MJ, Venom and Carnage live happily ever after. Canon has nothing to contradict that. I can headcanon WHATEVER I WANT, and it will never be jossed.

Anyway, “Peter Parker hates symbiotes” is almost as ingrained in his general character as “great power, great responsibility”. We’re never getting a story where Peter reconciles with a single symbiote. Certainly not with Cates sticking his queerphobic symbiote-hating fingers in the MSM pie.

[thedargonden]

[1] DREKI STUDIES - INTRODUCTION TO DRAGON HISTORY

DREKI STUDIES: "Our species had always been a peaceful monarchy back when our recorded history began.

Dreki, much like the modern offshoot, Idnagol, had each been given a magical gift when they were hatched, such as elemental sorcery, runic magic, healing, and many, many more.

One of the more rare, but more varied kinds of magical gifts were called Mystic Elementals. They were hatched with 4 eyes, and usually had abilities such as "mind reading" or "soulwatching" or dark magic.

The Dreki had built up an empire of sanctuary and freedom for thousands of years.

One day, a Dreki was hatched by the queen. Except this one was different than any Dreki seen before. Instead of a mane from head to tail, this dark purple dragon had sharp silver spikes along her spine. Her silver horns were also sharper than normal. She had 4 eyes like a Mystic Elemental, but her bottom eyes were matted shut. The queen named her Myrka.

By the time she was 5 years old, the dragon had a strange ability where she could create her own spells by saying what she wanted to happen. She casted a spell to completely remove her bottom eyes. Another spell that made everyone hermaphrodites so anyone could be what they wanted to be. She gave everyone the ability to use Telepathy. She also casted another spell that allowed all Dreki to shapeshift, except it didn't work on her.

She tried to make life better for everyone, but she ended up scaring them instead. All across the world, Dreki were in outrage about these spells. The queen, too, was furious at her, as she wasn't asked or told about this beforehand.

By that day, she was shunned for the rest of her life, and forbidden to create any spell on anyone anymore.

Many years later though, their moon started to drift toward their planet. Dragons were in distress and the queen was made aware of the imminent collision.

After an argument with the queen, Myrka flew off to the moon to bring it as far away from the planet as possible. She lived there, creating her own offspring, Myrkurs, leaving the rest to become what we now call Idnagols."

ORIE: "Ooh, cool!"

Orie yawns, her bottom eyes squinting at the ground while stretching. She flips many pages to a part she foresaw was a good page to skip to.

DREKI STUDIES: "Idnagol and Myrkur relations had always been less than great. The Myrkuran queen, Illa, was full of hate and jealousy toward the Idnagols.

While Idnagols were living peacefully and their planet lush and green, the Myrkur planet was a wasteland of dust. It barely had an atmosphere and it was hard to breathe, as it used to be a moon.

Both races had a peace agreement with each other, but obviously Illa didn't agree with the terms. She spent her resources creating a ship to bring the thousands of Myrkurs over to the Idnagol planet for an attack.

Many prophetic Mystic Elementals warned others to leave before the attack, but few believed them and took action to flee. Some Myrkurs rebelled against the attack from the inside, but they were promptly executed if they were seen by Illa herself.

About 3/4 of the Idnagols died that day, around 50 years ago. Now the remaining Idnagols who survived the attack are still running from the Myrkurs. They have their magic that can do anything, even locate or kill them. Why they haven't done the latter is unknown still.

This concludes Dreki Studies for the time being. I'll write more if any other news happens. - Logi"

Orie stares at the book for a moment. She wonders how this "Logi" dragon could write more if she already has the book. She plays with the idea that maybe this "Logi" could just walk into their house and write more inside, and leave.

She fiddles her claws on the tips of her blue mane thoughtfully.

ORIE: "Phoenix! Do you think this "Logi" dragon could walk into the house and finish their book!?"

Phoenix emerges with an unamused face from the hallway into the loungeroom where Orie is. The spike on the top of her head bangs against the top of the doorframe.

PHOENIX: "How do I keep hitting my head on this stupid thing? You’re taller than me, and I’ve never seen YOU do that!"

ORIE: "Maybe it's just that first Myrkur spike on your head?"

PHOENIX: "Shut up. I don't care, I'm only here to get a root beer from the fridge."

She opens the fridge in the loungeroom kitchen and pulls out a can of root beer, but it's room temperature.

PHOENIX: "God dammit. ORIE, DID YOU UNPLUG THE FRIDGE?"

Orie looks at the fridge with a shrug.

ORIE: "No? That's weird. Check the generator."

Phoenix notices that next to the fridge on the counter there's a shoddily made mini fridge looking thing with some smoke coming out of it.

She opens it, and it's full of cheesecakes.

PHOENIX: "ORIE DID YOU BREAK THE GENERATOR WITH YOUR STUPID CHEESECAKE FREEZER?!? "

ORIE: "Oh... My bad."

PHOENIX: "ORIE WHAT THE HELL, WHY DON'T YOU JUST USE THE FREEZER!?"

ORIE: "I did, look."

Phoenix opens the freezer compartment of the fridge and it's packed with maybe 20 cheesecakes.

PHOENIX: "ORIE. WHY. WOULD. YOU. NEED. TWENTY CHEESECAKES. PLUS EVEN MORE. IN A SEPARATE FREEZER?!?!?"

ORIE: "Dunno, I just love cheesecake."

[promisedangel]

Fresh Meat: Confinement- Chapter 22

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Chapter 22- End of Investigation

Serol was silent as he led two members of the Royal Guard through the metal pathways of Hotland. He was visibly uneasy. Not only did he not know his two escorts, but he also had to lead said escorts to a colleague and friend. A potential traitor. Serol felt his heart drop once more after countless times today. He didn’t know what was worse; that Malv was linked to the intruder’s break-in, or that he had to aid in arresting Malv. He sighed, either way, this was reality. After some twists and turns, Serol led the two Royal Guards to a residential district of Hotland. Nestled against a wall of volcanic rock were multiple floors filled with homes of stone and metal. Some were carved into the rock while others were metal homes on the platforms. Tall fences lined each platform and the stairs to each platform. A few monsters were hard at work improving supports, creating new homes, or repairing the platforms that held it all.

A few monsters turned and murmured at Serol and the guards as they passed. Serol dipped his neck to avoid the gazes of the crowd. Part of him wanted to turn tail and run. He was certainly capable; with his tail, he could jump far back into the metal paths of Hotland. He shook his head silently. No; he’d never forgive himself, and Dr. Gaster would not either. He continued down to the bottom platform of the residential district. This area had lights attached to the homes to light the area, though many were broken. Despite the darker area, Serol knew where to go.

Serol approached the first house carved into the volcanic rock. The curtains were visibly drawn and the door was closed. Serol turned to the Royal Guards nervously, “Um… it iss thiss one.” The first guard nodded. She turned the doorknob, only to have it jiggle slightly. Locked. Serol frowned, “Ssorry. I don’t have a key.” The second guard approached the door, “If Malv cooperates, that won’t be necessary.” The second guard knocked heavily on the door. They called out with an even, authoritative tone, “Malv, open up.” The three waited. Silence. No response. Serol looked visibly concerned, “That’sssstrange. They should be home.” The first guard knocked again. Before any time passed, Serol perked up, “Let me call them.” Serol dug into his bag and pulled out his cell phone. He dialed a number from memory fairly quickly. One ring. Two rings. On the second ring, the second guard’s ears perked up. They looked at the door with a scowl, “I hear a ringing in the house.” Serol kept the phone ringing. He pressed his head to the door for a moment. His eyes widened, “That’ss Malv’ss ringtone!” The second guard gently put a hand on Serol’s shoulder, “Stand aside.” Serol’s neck turned to the guard. Confusion budded before Serol relaxed. They gave a frown before they took a few paces out of the guards’ way. The first guard called out towards the door, “Last chance, Malv. Open the door, or we’re coming in.” Once more, the three of them waited. Silence. Not a hint of sound from inside once the ringtone ended. All was still. After a full minute, the two guards shared a look. They nodded. The second guard backed up a few paces. They charged the wooden door.  It only took one charge before the door flew open. It smacked into the wall to only move an inch back as the two guards charged into Malv’s house one by one.

The house was small. It only consisted of a front room and backroom. The front room was spread out in its decoration with only a large beige rug connecting everything. In all but one corner of the room was a desk, each piled with papers, books, or mechanisms and parts. Each had a chair pulled out. All except one which sat as though someone was at the table. The two guards noticed immediately that a cell phone sat at the edge of this table. That gaze shifted towards the chair itself. The first guard dropped her weapon in shock. Sitting in the chair was a pile of dust. Much of it had spilled over onto the floor and carpet below. Some of it seemed as though it had been moved. The second guard approached the pile silently. Serol cautiously peeked inside. He opened his mouth to speak, but his jaw only hung open at the sight of the dust pile. Serol spoke with a quiet somber, “Iss that… Malv?” The second guard kneeled down close to the pile, “Only one way to find out. Damnit, and I thought doing this arrest was going to get me away from cleaning up dust today.” The first guard shook her head in disappointment. Her gaze drifted to the floor, where it paused. She squinted her eyes as she spoke, “Wait… I think I see something in the carpet…” She kneeled down close to the carpet, “That kind of looks like a footprint!” The second guard, meanwhile, pulled out a pair of gloves and put them on, “Just one?” The second guard took a moment to examine the carpet surrounding the one footprint, “Nope! There’s more, and they go towards the door.” The second guard went back to her task. They muttered, “Okay… let's see if there’s an id here…” The second guard hesitated but stuck their gloved hand into the lower dust pile. They shivered and whined. They dug around in silence if not for their whines. The first guard, meanwhile, slowly tracked the footprints to the edge of the carpet near the door, “Okay… I think the one who stepped in dust whipped their feet off here before they left.”

Serol snaked his head in nervously, “Iss it ssafe to come in?” The first guard shook her head, “Not until we identify the-“ The second guard exclaimed, “OH THANK GOODNESS! I found something!” The first guard’s head ripped back at her co-worker, “Did you really have to shout?!” The second guard hissed as they pulled a small item out of the dust, “Yes, because I don’t have to touch dust anymore!” The first guard stood with a sharp sigh, “Alright. What is it?” The second guard stood and looked down at the item with a frown, “Some sort of… pin? It’s some sort of overgrown tree?” Serol’s expression grew serious. He briskly walked into the room, “Pleasse. Let me ssee.” The first guard went to interject, but relaxed. The second guard raised a brow and showed the pin. It was a willow tree. It was copper plated. Some of the copper green shone on the sides, but most of the pin was coated in shoddily applied paint of brown and green. Serol’s neck extended until he could closely examine the pin. He frowned, “That’ss Malv’ss pin. It’ss a keepsssake of their fatherss.” The second guard gave a serious look, “Sooo, if we ask Dr. Gaster to check the cameras in the lab, it’ll show Malv wearing the pin?” Serol nodded and spoke confidently, “Yess. They alwayss wear it. Every day.” The first guard scratched her head, “Then… was Malv killed by the intruder?” Serol perked up, “Maybe that’ss how he got Malv’ss keycard! He murdered them and ssstole it!” The second guard shrugged, “That’s honestly what I started thinking when you said this was Malv’s.”

Serol’s neck lowered towards the dust pile, “Malv… I’m sso ssorry…” The first guard spoke sympathetically, “It’s not your fault, Serol. The intruder probably saw them as the best chance of getting into the lower lab.” Serol sighed, “Maybe… I jussst…” Serol cupped his face. A few tears leaked from his always open eyes. The first guard gently caressed his shoulder scales, “We know. Loss hurts.” Serol nodded. He didn’t take his hands away from his face. The three stood there for a few moments. More tears leaked from Serol. The second guard was the first to break the silence, “Um… sorry to interrupt this mourning… but… we all know we need to report back.” Serol sniffled, “Yess. That’ss right. Dr. Gasster is waiting for uss.” The first guard spoke calmly, “There should be a patrol somewhere in this district. Hopefully, we can spot them, and they can take care of Malv’s dust.” Serol nodded. He wiped the last of his tears away, “If… the dusst iss not claimed… I’ll sspread it. I think I know what Malv would have wanted.” The first guard nodded, “Ok.” The second guard spoke gently, “You… ready to go?” Serol nodded. His hands lowered from his face. He smiled sadly, “Yess. We besst not keep Dr. Gasster waiting.”

—————————————————————————

“So… yeah. The family’s just a motivation. They didn’t know.” Undyne concluded. Once more she sat in Gaster’s office, being interviewed by him. Her nose had some redness still from Susie’s punch, but was otherwise fine. Gaster sat across from her, writing in the same notebook as before. After a few scribbles he commented, “And this sister—Susie, I believe you said her name was— you are certain she was only a motivation?” Undyne nodded, “Definitely. She was the most upfront with her answers.” She pointed to the redness on her nose with a proud smirk, “And she’s got one hell of a punch for someone so weak.” Gaster’s scribbles halted immediately. A baffled look crossed across his skull. His eye sockets blinked as he processed what he just heard. He stressed his words with a look of disbelief, “Did you just say she struck you?” Undyne’s expression evened out as she relaxed, “Yeah. Because I let her. I told them all I killed Kurt. And if I was gonna let anyone of them hit me because of it, it’d be her.” Gaster sat still for a moment. His eye socket visibly twitched. He bought his free hand up to lightly facepalm his skull with a deep sigh. Undyne elaborated with a serious gaze, “I’m not pressing charges.” Gaster relaxed his arm. His expression slowly leveled out as he spoke, “I understand. But do not make yourself such a target in the future. We cannot afford the population to see weakness in the Royal Guard.“ Undyne scowled. She stood and slammed her hands on Gaster’s desk, leaning on it, “I wasn’t showing weakness! I was making up for what I did to their family member!”

Gaster glared daggers at Undyne He stayed silent through Undyne’s excuse. He stood in return. He looked down at her, towering almost a foot over her. Undyne’s fins drooped. Her expression dropped. Her mind went at a million miles a minute. Did she say something wrong? Was it her slamming on the desk? No. She wasn’t wrong. Her expression evened out. She stood tall and stared straight into Gaster’s eye sockets. The two shared this glare for a solid moment before Gaster cracked a smirk. He scoffed, “Perhaps not.” He frowned and spoke in an authoritative tone, “Just learn to use that strength towards your duties. Not your superiors. Understood?” Undyne stood in attention. She replied, “Understood, Sir.” Gaster sat back down behind his desk, “Good. For now, tell the guards that are cleaning and examining the crime scene the location of our intruder’s family. Since you were averse to the idea, they will deliver his dust in your stead. Afterwards, you are dismissed and are to go back to your normal duties.” Undyne nodded. She turned to leave. She opened the door. Once the door swung open, Gaster spoke up, “One more thing, Undyne.” Undyne stopped. She turned towards her boss with a confused look, “Yeah?” Gaster glared back at Undyne, his eyes alight with magic, “Test me like that again and you won’t be sent off with a warning.” A chill ran down Undyne’s spine, but she kept her composure. She cursed silently; she pushed it too far. She frowned and replied evenly, “Understood, sir.” Undyne left without another word. She sighed deeply once out of earshot. She muttered to herself, “Goddamnit.”

She was quick to find the guards cleaning up the dust. She quickly mentioned the family’s location. With that, she left. Up the elevator and out of the lab. She followed the path and sighed, “Guess I should go to HQ. See if my patrol route’s changed.” Undyne grumbled. She already knew her route wouldn’t have changed. Didn’t hurt to try. She went to the elevator to New Home. Along the path, she saw Serol and two guards walk towards her. Serol’s expression was downcast, even his neck lowered his head to above his knees. The two guards accompanying him had more even expressions. Serol perked up at the sight of Undyne. His head raised to his shoulders as Undyne approached, “Oh! Missss Undyne. Hello.” Undyne waved, “Hey. What’s up? I’m finally done with this whole intruder business. You reporting in?” Serol’s expression dropped once more, “I already did. I am coming back from arressting the true culprit.” Undyne blinked. She leaned in place to see around Serol and the guards. No one else was with them. She raised a brow, “Doesn’t… look like you have anyone with you…” Serol nodded, “Yess. Malv wass killed.” Undyne’s eyes widened, “What, really?!” The first guard nodded, “We found a pile of dust on and surrounding a desk chair.” The second guard held up Malv’s pin, “We found this pin inside it. Serol said it’s Malv’s. We’re heading back to the lab to check the cameras to confirm it. Case seems pretty cut and dry from here.” Undyne nodded, “Yeah. The intruder’s family had nothing to do with the crime either; they were just a motivation.” Serol sighed in relief, “That iss good to hear.” Undyne began to walk, “Anyway. I gotta get going. I’m gonna go see if my route’s changed. And take care with Dr. Gaster.” Serol nodded, “I know.”

———————————————————————————

“There! You can ssee it there!” Serol pointed at a lower screen in the camera room. He stood there with the two guards and Gaster. All eyes locked on the screen Serol pointed to. It showed Malv, pinned on their chest was what appeared to be the same pin. The second guard held up the pin up towards the screen. Gaster’s eyes flitted between the pin on the screen and the pin in the guard’s hand. He nodded, “The pins are indeed the same. If everything you’ve reported is true, then I have no issue with your conclusion. Malv was simply a victim in all of this.” Serol sighed in relief. The first guard spoke, “Are there any other leads that need to be followed up on?” Gaster shook his head, “No. After everything I’ve heard today, I believe we’ve concluded this case swiftly and I have a solid sequence of events.” Gaster paused. He opened his notebook and recounted from his notes, “Kurt, our intruder, provoked by the fact his family didn’t receive any of the substitute, sough the human to correct it. To that end, he began to observe who frequented the laboratory to find targets and information. He chose Malv as his target. After killing them, Kurt immediately used Malv’s keycard to break into the lab and attempt to steal the human. An attempt that was thwarted by Undyne, thanks to Alphys quickly calling the Royal Guard. And because Kurt continued to break down the door after Undyne warned him, Undyne rightfully struck him down into dust.” Gaster sharply closed the notebook, “That is the overall sequence of events that this investigation has uncovered.”

Serol asked nervously, “Um… doesss thiss mean my team iss free to go?” Gaster nodded, “Yes.” Gaster turned to the guards, “Since you two were proactive in sending someone to clean the crime scene, you are dismissed after one more task each. One of you tell Serol’s team they are dismissed before you leave. As for the other, I want you to send a message to the Royal Guard’s headquarters.” The second guard nodded, “I’ll tell them. What do you need?” “Make a list of those interested in guard duty. Due to this incident, I will have no choice but to position guards at the elevator to the lower lab.”

The two guards left without another word. Gaster turned to Serol last, “And, Serol." Serol lowered his head, ready for a chastising. Instead, Gaster’s expression and tone calmed, “No matter the outcome, your team would have been shorted one member. If you feel you need another member to ensure the quality of the soul scanning device, I’ll allow it. If not, I’ll push back the next deadline to give your team time to grieve and adjust to the loss.” Serol flashed a surprised look. He didn’t expect Gaster to be sympathetic to the situation. He frowned, “I’m afraid that iss not a decccisssion I can make on my own. I will need to dissscussss it with my team.” Gaster nodded, “Understandable. I’ll give your team a hold period of 48 hours to come up with a decision. You may call me once you have such a decision.” Serol bowed his head slightly, “Thank you for this opportunity.” “It is only given because you cooperated. Now go. You’re dismissed.” “Thank you, ssir.”

——————————————————————————————

Alphys grinned ear to ear as she turned off the tv, “Sooo, what did you think?” Chara shrugged, slumped in their chair, “It was kind of entertaining. It is not something I’d normally enjoy, but I’m willing to talk about it with you.” Alphys jumped off the bed. She went over to the tv to collect and properly store the DVD, “That’s good to hear. I’ll have to watch these early episodes again, so I can tell you about them with a lot of detail.” Chara’s hand drifted up to their head. They casually scratched their head as they spoke, “It should hopefully break up the daily monotony.”

As Chara’s fingers traced downwards through their hair, they found their fingers stuck. Chara tried a couple more times but found their tangled hair unable to be tamed without a brush. Chara frowned. They expected this but not to such a degree; they knew it was inevitable in their situation. Alphys was quick to notice, “Is something wrong with your hair?” Chara sighed. They gently pulled their fingers out without running through their hair. They had a visible tangle of hair on their right side. They replied with an annoyed tone, “Only tangles. It’s to be expected since I haven’t been able to brush it for almost a month.” Alphys began to shift her gaze around the room, “Hold on. I think I have a comb around here somewhere…” Chara sputtered a small chuckle, “Why do you have a comb? You have scales, not hair.” Alphys blushes as she began to move things around on her dresser, “I found it in the dump. I washed it and…”

Her expression softened. She sighed, “It… reminded me of Ma.” Chara raised an inquisitive brow, “A comb reminded you of your mother?” Alphys nodded, “One of them.” “What does that mean?” Alphys continued to dig around her room for the comb as she spoke, “When monsters reproduce, we aren’t bound to specific sexes to reproduce. Theoretically, any monster can reproduce with any other monster. If not physically, then through magic.” Chara blinked in surprise, “That’s convenient. As far as I can tell, human reproduction still requires a man and a woman.” Alphys gave a small chuckle, “Yeah. That’s what the books on human biology said, too. But, they kind of hinted that they’re making some strides through science, but there wasn’t much on that subject in my books.”

Alphys opened one of the drawers. She beamed and exclaimed, “Here it is! I knew I kept it safe!” Alphys pulled out a medium sized comb. It was a black comb with some fake jewel ornamentation. A few of said fake jewels had already fallen out of their sockets. A few of the teeth were broken off as well, but not enough to make the comb unusable. Alphys frowned. Her tone got more somber as she spoke, “It’s… not as pretty as Ma’s… but that was broken when… she and mom died…” Chara frowned. They said nothing in response. They knew nothing they could say would help. Alphys took a deep breath of recovery. Her expression evened, “But… I still remember them. Mom used to say she fell in love with Ma because she saw Ma and her golden hair shine in the moonlight.” Chara instinctually grasped their locket. Their mind drifted to the Dreemurrs. While being confined to this lab, would Chara soon forget them? The scent of Toriel’s cooking? The loving but naive guidance of Asgore? The soft touch and laughter of Asriel? The whispers reappeared. Their chest felt heavy. Every fiber of their being told them it would be true. Chara had proof around their neck that they would remember them. Even Alphys remembered her parents after, for all Chara knew, centuries!

Chara’s thoughts were disrupted by Alphys. Her voice was close, “Chara? Are you okay?” Chara snapped back to reality. Alphys had come up to Chara and stood in front of them. Chara kept and even expression. They nodded, “I am fine.” Alphys smiled softly. She held the comb to Chara, “Here. It may be a little sensitive. Please be careful.” Chara frowned, “I’m not used to using a comb. All my life I’ve used a brush.” Alphys held the comb close to her, “Oh! That’s okay! I brushed Ma’s hair when I was young. I know what a comb can take. Here. Let’s move the chair closer to the bed. I’ll comb your hair.” Chara turned their head back. They scooted the chair across the floor, only a few feet, to be next to the bed with their back turned to it. Alphys sat on the bed behind Chara. She nodded, “Perfect. Now… I can’t guarantee this won’t hurt a little, but I’ll try to be gentle. Okay?” Chara pushed their hair back behind their ears. All except their bangs now lay on their back. Alphys gently grasped some of Chara’s hair, “Okay. I’ll start from the bottom and work my way up. That should make everything less painful.” Alphys slowly ran the comb through a small section of hair. Such tangles were undone with some resistance. Alphys slowly, carefully combed through Chara’s hair. She held sections of hair at a time and worked from the bottom up. After most of the bottom was complete, Alphys commented, “Wow, I never realized how soft your hair was.” Chara fidgeted in their seat a little, “I suppose.” “Ma’s hair was always corse. I think it was to protect her instead of making her pretty.” Chara snickered, “And yet your mother found beauty in it regardless.” Alphys nodded, “Yeah. Was it the same for your birth parents?”

Chara’s lighthearted expression dropped sharply, not that Alphys could see. They leaned their head forward. No sound escaped them. Alphys noticed Chara moving. She perked up, “Chara?” Chara stressed their words, “I don’t want to talk about them. Even if I did, I don’t know the answer to your question.” Alphys frowned but she continued combing Chara’s hair regardless. She sighed. The two stayed silent for a moment before Chara spoke with a small chuckle of disbelief, “But, it’s funny.” Alphys raised a brow, “What?” “I can’t tell which one has hurt me more. Him. Or my birth mother.” Alphys’s combing stopped. Her eyes widened. The skin under her scales paled. Dread overtook her tone, “She… hurt you?” A few tears peaked from Chara’s eyes. They began to choke on their words, “Yes.” Alphys immediately hugged Chara from behind, around their shoulders. Chara’s arms wrapped Alphys’s from under. Chara leaned their chin and rested it on their fingers. Tears flowed. Chara began to choke and sob, “This is why I didn’t want to talk about her.” Alphys spoke simply, “I’m sorry.” The two sat there for many long minutes. Chara’s sobs the only source of noise in the room. Never pulling away from each other’s embrace. Not until the sobs stopped. Chara took a few slow, deep breaths. They lifted their head and lowered their arms. They spoke two words, “Thank you.” Alphys nodded, “Of course.”

Alphys went back to slowly comb out Chara’s hair. Alphys was careful, slow, meticulous in the combing. By the time she was done, both of them knew it had been another half hour since they had begun. She had even moved to in front of Chara to carefully comb their bangs, what little tangles they had. She smiled, content with her completed task, “There. All done.” Alphys stood tall as Chara adjusted their hair to their normal hairstyle. Alphys went over towards the dresser, “Your hair really shines when it’s cared for.” Chara shrugged, “I’ve not been able to wash it, so that shine could simply be oil and grime.” Alphys carefully put her comb away, “Well, maybe next time we can do that!” Chara frowned, “I highly doubt we will have time like this ever again.” “Then… what if when I come into your room, I could bring some water and the comb? It’s a little rudimentary, but we’d be able to wash your hair and comb it. I’ve been re-reading some sections of the books I kinda… glazed over… and all manner of hygiene care can affect your health if neglected.” Chara stretched in their chair, “I suppose that could work…” Alphys nodded, “Okay! How about after they replace your door tomorrow?” Chara blinked. They settled back in their chair with a confused glance, “What? Are they… not replacing it now?” Alphys shook her head, “Well… no. The replacement door has to be made. It’ll be delivered early tomorrow. Honestly, the door change might wake you up.” “Oh… I see…”

There was an awkward silence before a knock sounded on the door. Both Alphys and Chara stared at the door. Alphys in curiosity. Chara with tinges of fear. Alphys approached the door and opened it. Gaster stood there with an even expression. Alphys slumped over submissively, “Oh! Dr. Gaster. Is the… investigation complete?” Gaster answered evenly, “Indeed it is. And the crime scene has been cleaned.” His gaze fell on Chara. A chill ran down Chara’s spine. Gaster called out to Chara, “It is time you returned to your room. I will take you there myself.” Alphys blinked, “Sir, is this necessary? I’m sure you have a lot of work-“ Gaster glared down at Alphys. He interrupted in an authoritative tone, “I said. I will take the human myself.” Alphys quieted immediately. She curled in on herself further. She stepped back a few paces. She replied with a chastised tone, “Yes… sir…” Gaster once more looked over at Chara. He simply motioned for Chara to follow, “Do I need to force you?” Chara’s expression dropped. They silently stood from their seat and approached. Gaster smirked as Chara approached with an avoided gaze. He spoke simply, “Good.” Gaster turned to leave. Chara followed behind in silence. Before they left the room, Alphys quietly spoke, “S-see you later, Chara…”

[thatshinobilife]

i know ive seen you sy in the past you like Avatar, I was wondering what you thought about the live action series netflix just announced ?

Hmmm……how to put this. This is how all avatar related content has gone since the original series concluded in 2008: 

Legend of Korra: badAvatar Comics: REALLY bad2010 film: SOUL shatteringly terribleLike don’t get me wrong - I WANT this to be good. I WANT this to be worth watching, to be worth making, to be worthy of the original series. But literally nothing that has happened in the franchise since 2008 has given me any hope that it will be. While I respect the work Bryan and Mike did on the original series, they are FAR from the only reason it succeeded and a mass amount of credit is owed to the rest of the writing department who as I understand it will have nothing to do with this live action reimagining. Bryan and Mike are very much an example of writers who believed too much in their own hype and no longer have a firm grasp on what actually made the original show good in the first place. They freely admit half of the things that were great about ATLA were not their ideas and they had to be talked into including. They also committed what I feel is the cardinal sin of writing…….the magnum opus of creator fuck ups…….they retroactively ruined good things about their original show when they attempted to make a sequel. The second you start doing that, I lose all faith in you as a writer. I talk about this with Naruto all the time - if it’s between getting new content at the cost of having the original dragged through the mud or getting no new content at all, then I would rather have no new content. And that’s kind of how I feel with this. 

I’m also…..extremely attached to the entire atla cast and don’t want to see them flanderized or written out of character. Azula specifically is my favorite fictional character of all time (even more than the sand sibs!) which is very worrisome as she’s also a hard character to get right. Aaron Ehasz - head writer on ATLA - made a comment that even the internal production team during the run of the show commonly misunderstood her. Bryke clearly don’t understand her given the way they greenlit the comics god awful interpretation of her as ~psychopathic-straightjacket-crazy~ which like…..ok…..actually I can’t even talk about this because it makes me so irrationally angry. I want to be in a good mood so I have to drop this subject right now immediately. I think there’s also some valid concerns about it being done in live action. Avatar is a show that worked VERY well as an animated story. The visual tone and style would require high budget to adequately pull off and even then I’m not sure it would work. While the thought of seeing some of the more epic moments in live action is admittedly exciting to me, I also worry the aesthetic charm of the original will be lost in that format. While bending is based heavily on martial arts, there’s still a fluidity in motion showcased in the original that’s simply not possible to achieve in live action. There’s also just the question of “why” we need a live action version in the first place as there’s not a ton of ways to improve on the original. It makes me think they’re just using this as an excuse to produce a ~darker~ more “mature” version of the original which…..lmfao. Part of the reason ATLA was so good is because it DIDN’T rely on cheap shock factor or graphic content to communicate its themes. There was a quiet yet deeply honest simplicity in the way they addressed the darker aspects of the show that made it so emotionally compelling. I know ya’ll think Game of Thrones is cool but not everything benefits by being made more ~edgy~. ATLA is already a mature show and the fact that its a cartoon doesn’t change that. 

My greatest fear though is that they will change the original story to try and forcibly integrate the lore-breaking nonsense that plagued the legend of korra in a completely transparent attempt to validate their own poor writing decisions on the sequel. One mention of raava and I’m cancelling my netflix subscription. 

So to summarize: while I’m involuntarily excited on principle, I can’t help but feel this entire project is going to end up just as rage inducing and shoddily written as every other spin off that’s come before it. I genuinely hope I eat my words though! ATLA is an absolutely beautiful show rich with content and I would be over the moon if this new series manages to improve on it or at least lives up somewhat to the quality of the original. I’m just very cautious about it as of right now. I’m not trying to be overly negative but I’m just……I’m so tired. The only sequel/spin off/remake in the entire universal literary canon that hasn’t let me down is Bambi II. 

[outofthisgxlaxy]

☯ + Bismuth during the wedding (and catching the bouquet?)

Send me ‘☯ + a scene from my characters canon’ and I will drabble it from my character’s POV.

“But for just one day let’s only think about...”

“Just one day, let’s only think about...” Bismuth walked outside with the rest of the wedding crew as Steven’s song concluded, joining in the singing herself. Everything really was turning up roses, wasn’t it? The sun was shining, everyone who’d been invited had come to the wedding, and Sapphire was already in position. As the final strains of the song died down and Steven used his floating powers to guide him down to where Sapphire stood, Bismuth found herself smiling from ear to ear. She saw Steven give the signal to Greg just a moment later. As he started to play Ruby and Sapphire’s song, Bismuth exchanged a glance with Pearl. Her old friend smiled right along with her.

Greg led the way, as they had practiced, with Amethyst and Connie right behind him. Pearl walked before her, and Bismuth herself kept her hand steady as she walked. The special rings she had made for Ruby and Sapphire were clutched in her surprisingly gentle hold. The last thing she wanted was to lose them on such a special day. Right behind her was Peridot, carrying her little basket of flowers. Honestly? Even after the rehearsal they had run through with just Steven she still didn’t quite know what Peridot’s job was. She wasn’t complaining though.

As they drew closer to the aisle, Bismuth moved to walk beside Pearl instead of behind her. Pearl didn’t acknowledge it, but that was fine. It just had felt right to do so. Behind her? Bismuth could hear Peridot start to hand out flowers.

“Flowers for you, flowers for you, flowers for YOU!” The last flower must have been thrown with an incredible amount of force. Bismuth heard it smack against the unfortunate recipient and the unmistakable thud of someone hitting the sandy ground. Every ounce of self control was poured in to not laughing. Instead, Bismuth took her place beside Pearl and Amethyst on the beach and stood to look where Steven and Sapphire stood. She got a good view of Peridot walking up to Steven that way.

“Wedding commander? All flowers have been deployed!”

“Thanks, Peridot,” Steven said. Bismuth couldn’t stop herself from snorting just a little bit. She’d only known Peridot for a short time, but already the green Gem was proving to be quite a hoot. The thoughts were pushed aside, though, in favor of admiring Sapphire’s smart suit. Bismuth had seen a fair amount of human fashions before. The suit just suited Sapphire’s style, she thought. The dark blue also complimented her physical form’s natural blues, and the violet... it was such a nice touch. She had to give her compliments both to Sapphire and to Steven for suggesting the violets in the first place.

Then she saw a bit of red from the corner of her eye. Looking back to the beach house revealed Ruby, and stars... she looked beautiful. Pride began to swell up in Bismuth’s chest. These were her friends that were looking their absolute best, and their happiest. Ruby must have caught Sapphire’s eye, she thought, because she saw Ruby smiling as big as could be even from as far away as she was. Then... Ruby immediately began to make a dash for the aisle. Greg sped up his playing to compensate, but nothing could stop Ruby from fireballing her way down the aisle and right to Sapphire’s side.

Composure remained, though damned if Bismuth didn’t want to start busting out the laughter. Everything was going over so well! So perfectly, in fact, that she didn’t know why she hadn’t imagined Ruby doing this before. She even saw Amethyst break away from where they stood to stomp out fire that had been set by Ruby’s actions.

Yes... this definitely was the most memorable wedding she’d ever been to. It was starting for real now, though. Steven had cleared his throat, and Bismuth turned her gaze toward him, Ruby, and Sapphire.

“Dearly beloved. Gems, humans, lions big and small, living gourds... Onion.” Bismuth felt her eyes starting to water as her smile broadened. It really was happening. She didn’t even know why she was getting so emotional over it. Perhaps it was because she finally was seeing her friends go through with something special, or perhaps it just was the joy of everyone being together, but whatever it was? She wasn’t complaining.

“We are gathered here today to celebrate Ruby and Sapphire. Two of my favorite people who combine into one of my other favorite people! You all probably know her as Garnet.”

That’s right we do, Bismuth agreed. Not that she didn’t love Ruby and Sapphire she adored them. It just had been so long since she’d been with Garnet, and she really was looking forward to it. Steven continued, though.

“She is their love. Given form. Now it’s your turn to talk about that,” Steven told Ruby and Sapphire. Bismuth shifted her position a bit so she could get a better look at the two. She could see Sapphire’s face, but also saw the back of Ruby’s head for a time. The vows were starting, though. She’d been wondering what they might say to each other. Ruby started.

“I know this is all kinda silly. I mean... we’ve been together for 5750 years,” Ruby said. Sapphire chimed in with the number of months. Eight, to be precise. Stars... had it really been that long? Bismuth almost couldn’t believe it herself, but why doubt the power couple? They’d know it better than anyone.

“I used to feel like I wasn’t much good. Just... one of me on my own,” Ruby said. “But when we’re together, it feels like... it’s okay to just be me.” Bismuth’s heart swelled, if that was even possible. Ruby was so ernest! As subtly as she could, she raised her hand to wipe tears from her eyes. It didn’t do much good, so she gave up and continued to listen.

“So I wanna be me with you! And not even the diamonds can stop us! And if they try? We’ll beat ‘em up!” Seeing Ruby punch and kick at the air and hearing Sapphire’s laughter brought a bit of quieted laughter from Bismuth. Same old Ruby. But what would Sapphire have to add to those vows?

“Ruby. My future used to look like one single, obvious stream. Unbending ‘til the end of time. In an instant, you pulled me from that destiny and opened my eye to an explosion of infinite possible futures! Streaking across space and time, altered and obliterated by the smallest force of will!”

Bismuth, still teary eyed, stared in awe of Sapphire. She had such a way with words. Not even Bismuth had expected her to speak with such passion, or to hear her gush so passionately about what she loved about Ruby. She saw Sapphire take Ruby’s hand shortly after that.

“What I mean is... you changed my life. And then, I changed your life. And now we change our lives.”

“Bismuth! The rings!” Bismuth could hear Steven clearly, but she couldn’t make herself move yet. She knew she needed to deliver the rings. That was her whole job as maid of honor, or at least a part of it, but those speeches... Bismuth just wanted to appreciate them a bit longer. She did feel Amethyst jab her with her elbow.

“Hey, Bismuth. That’s your cue!” Amethyst’s voice was hushed, but she heard it. As for Bismuth? She was trying not to just completely break down from how beautiful the vows were and from how proud she was. However, she did get herself together and looked at Amethyst. Not even bothering to really wipe her eyes, she nodded to Amethyst and retrieved the rings. When she got there, she offered a small apology.

Sapphire took the copper ring and slipped it on to Ruby’s left hand. Ruby did the same, but she took the silver ring and slipped it on to Sapphire’s right hand. Perfect, Bismuth thought. The rings would transfer from them to Garnet even after they fused. They’d likely even stay with them should the power couple ever be sent into their gems. That was Bismuth’s hope, at least. She stepped back to her spot and watched Steven ask the couple if they would take each other to have and to hold on Earth and any other planet.

Sapphire’s eagerness was about as adorable as Ruby’s enthusiasm. It was time, though. Steven pronounced them Garnet, and Bismuth saw the two kiss passionately. One twirl, two twirls... the pair began to shine brighter than anything, and their forms gave way to fusion. When they reformed, Garnet stood in their place. Her outfit was to die for, Bismuth thought, and she looked as happy as anything... as she should have, Bismuth thought. The moment Garnet brought her visor back and smiled brightly at the crowd, Bismuth began to applaud and cheer enthusiastically.

...

The party carried on through the rest of the day. Sunset had rolled around, and after mingling with humans and getting to spend a bit of time with Garnet one on one, Bismuth stood back to watch Garnet do something Steven said was traditional. Brides were apparently supposed to throw their bouquet up into the air for some reason. Garnet did, and the force she used seemed to launch it into outer space.

“Nice one, Garnet!” Bismuth complimented. She clapped Garnet on the back as she did, and she and her old friend shared a good laugh. This was all she had wanted. However, Garnet told her that she needed to talk with Steven for a little bit. 

“I get’cha, Garnet. Go on. Thank him for all the hard work he put into this. I’ll be fine,” Bismuth told her. So as Garnet left, Bismuth found herself mingling with the human everyone called Ronaldo.

“Nice armor!” He complimented. Bismuth grinned. Someone who appreciated armor? Maybe this human wasn’t so bad. However, he started talking about his own... shoddily put together armor, and Bismuth quirked a brow. This was what humans thought was good armor? She clearly needed to sit down and show some humans a thing or two. But before long, she excused herself from Ronaldo’s presence and went to chat with Pearl and Amethyst.

As she was chatting with them, talking about how great the wedding was, something fell from the sky and smacked her on the head. Well... it felt more like a light bounce than anything else. Bismuth held her hands out, unintentionally, and caught whatever it was. It was Garnet’s bouquet.

“What in the stars...?” Bismuth looked upward. It had come down already? And why was Amethyst laughing? She didn’t fully get it, but... it had happened. Whatever it was.

[gyromitra-esculenta]

Somewhat Discussed 3

Ok. So, chapter 3 of this monstrosity.  In which field medic Jack 'Perpetually Not Getting Enough Sleep' Morrison gets co-opted to Strike Team after FUBAR military offensive.

Warnings: Crack treated seriously; Smurfs; Pokemon; Blood and Violence; Neeeeeeeeeeeerds!

*

Fifteen minutes in, Gabriel had read (and not skimmed!) all the applicable reports, analyzed all the current projections and formulated the initial plan of action - pending approval, but a plan nonetheless. Then, boredom set in right on schedule. He eyed the trash panda sleeping in the chair and began the excruciatingly slow process of extracting himself from the bed stealthily, which, on its own, was met with a considerable amount of success up to the precise moment he decided to check his surroundings and looked up.

The trash panda was, in fact, very much awake, and observed him with a modicum of amusement as Gabriel froze with his bare ass hanging off the bed.

With the same amount of deliberate care, Gabriel pulled himself back into the bed while the trash panda sipped on his cup of coffee. If the liquid in the cup had any property indicated by the smell that still lingered, it was both highly corrosive and bitter enough to kill off all taste buds too weak to survive a serving of salty licorice.

"Good," the trash panda muttered as Gabriel meekly pulled back the blanket over himself, and with no unnecessary delay returned to the relaxed posture he held earlier in the chair - again immediately falling asleep on the spot. Only this time, his head fell back, and the snoring started. How, even doped beyond any rational thinking ability, had he ever imagined a person capable of producing sounds so reminiscent of, for the lack of a better word, a petrol chainsaw, to have an 'angelic voice', Gabriel would never understand.

The cup of the volatile coffee the trash panda still held onto somehow remained miraculously balanced.

With far too much idle time left and guarded by the apparent incarnation of Cerberus crossed with whatever survived the wood-chipper after its initial run, Gabriel turned to the contraband on his jailbroken top-secret-military-use-only PDA, not bothering with the earbuds. Halfway into the third episode, the trash panda's watch alarm went off, and Gabriel frantically scrambled to close the video - only upping the volume before he found the back button. With the way the guy blinked and straightened, he was safe.

What had not been saved was the coffee, because as soon as the trash panda woke, he looked at his watch - which required him to rotate his wrist, and, in consequence, pour everything that remained in the cup into his lap.

"Fuck." The trash panda gazed down with a look of defeat. "Fuck," he repeated, adding a special emphasis on the 'f'-sound, giving the word an elongated hissing beginning that came to a rapid stop - like a train hurtling off the tracks on a broken bridge hitting the rock bottom of the canyon below. The pronunciation was deeply artistic and empathetic.

And it was almost enough for Gabriel to feel sorry for the trash panda but, as his father oft said, in this bitch of a life you had to be hard, not soft. He hemmed to draw attention to himself.

"The hour's up, I take it I can get the hell out of here?"

"No."

"No?"

"No," the trash panda shot him a pointed glare at his indignant tone - or as much of a glare as he could muster under the circumstances of the cold coffee all over his lap and the obvious sleep deprivation. "Examination first. Sir. Or there's going to be pictures."

"I'll get them confiscated."

"You really think you're going to win this one?" The trash panda snickered in tired amusement. "Sir," he tacked on the end absentmindedly while pulling himself up, and deposited the now (probably) empty cup on the chair. "I wouldn't make that bet if I were you. Sir."

Gabriel erred on the side of caution and shut the fuck up. For now. The trash panda wobbled to the table, poured the disinfectant on his palms before pulling on the gloves, and, after some deliberation coupled with a hard glare of disappointment at his own crotch, he shimmied into the scrubs. Also, he promptly poured what appeared to be the other half of the bottle all over his surgical gloves, splashing the disinfectant everywhere around. It would be unsurprising if some of it made it even to the ceiling, to terrorize the local germ fauna. Or flora. Whichever one it was.

Gabriel, suddenly uncomfortably aware of the fact that under the medbay blanket he was clad in a typical hospital gown bought from the lowest bidding contractor, clutched the flimsy barrier of thin cotton privacy protectively to his chest.

"Off with it," the trash panda grunted. Having been caught earlier in the act with his ass hanging off the bed notwithstanding, Gabriel still refused to relinquish his grip on the fabric. The trash panda continued, unamused. "Unless you have something worse there than dickachu, or pokeballs, I've seen it all."

The absurdity of the statement got to Gabriel, and he stared dumbfounded.

"Oh, yeah, was trying to get the pants off that one guy, and there it was, smack dab in the middle, almost on his dick, a tattoo of a Pikachu." The trash panda waved his hands in the air, imitating the motion, while he elaborated. "Got past it, and then, bam!, two pokeballs, in full technicolor, on the ballsack, right in my face. If you can top that, more power to you, I won’t judge, but I will laugh."

"...definitely can't." Gabriel, still in a state of moderate shock, brushed the blanket aside. But not all the way, no, he wouldn't be the one to do that, no fucking way. The trash panda shrugged and pulled the gown up and away from his side, at least with enough decency to leave it bunched over the more sensitive areas, and started prodding the injury, none too gently.

"Looks decent." The trash panda hemmed.

"So I can go?"

"No." The trash panda swung the scanner around and lowered it, still manhandling the sensitive healing tissue with his hand. Until, focused on the screen, he jabbed his fingers in, probably trying to get right at Gabriel's kidney from the outside. Gabriel, eyes watering, was now of a mind that he had been retroactively in the right for breaking the guy's face. He definitely did deserve that, and no judge or jury would find him to be in the wrong here. Especially after the sad wheeze the treatment got out of him.

"What should stick, sticks, and the rest is unsticked," the trash panda yawned, stepping back, and promptly kicked the scanner back into its corner - completely oblivious of Gabriel's seething glare. "So, you can call someone to give you something to wear, or, like, walk like that, I don’t give a shit."

Gabriel took his tablet to ping Ana as the trash panda slowly advanced towards the trashcan with the movements of someone on the verge of a full system collapse. He pulled on the scrubs, balled them together with the gloves, and missed the bin from less than twenty centimeters away – which had to be some kind of achievement. He contemplated the situation for a moment before looking over his shoulder.

"Hey, I've got a strange question. Was there Smurfs' theme playing earlier?"

Sweet Mary, mother of Christ, this couldn't be happening. Gabriel almost let go of the PDA for the second time this day.

"What the fuck is 'smurfs'?" Full-on denial it was then.

"Huh? Funny. Auditory hallucinations are setting in earlier than usual," the trash panda mumbled to himself, shuffling out of the room. Gabriel breathed a painful sigh of relief before his brain made a record-scratch sound. The imaginary needle ground to a halt and backed up, suddenly going the other way altogether with an unearthly screech, broken up only with Ana's surprised voice coming from the corridor.

"What happened to your pants?"

"Coffee, ma'am." The trash panda slurred. "Mostly."

"Mostly." Gabriel did not need to visualize the expression that accompanied Ana's curt tone.

"I guess, some blood and guts under?"

"We're flying in half an hour," Ana concluded with an exasperated sigh. "Get your gear together."

"Aw, shucks. I wanted to grab some shuteye before."

As soon as Ana marched into the room, Gabriel met with a faceful of clothes. Compared to the trash panda, her aim was deadly, and her throwing arm never wavered.

"You're lucky we're making a resupply stop on the way before we pick up Liao because this is your last intact set."

"Not like it's my fault," Gabriel muttered while untangling from the pants’ legs that have somehow multiplied into a number higher than the usual two.

"Of course, the mine just happened to jump you, from the other side of the field." This was worse. This was her 'mom' voice. Gabriel winced.

"Difference is, I can take it."

"For how long, Gabriel?"

Not an argument he was willing, or in the mood, to rehash, especially not under Ana's scrutinizing gaze boring into him with the intensity his third-grade teacher (who really, really had it out for him) employed.

"As long as it takes," Gabriel grumbled under his breath, even more uncomfortable with changing in her presence now that he made the connection to his childhood's anathema and felt her ghastly glare drop the temperature in the room by around ten degrees due to a mere flashback.

"Could you, you know..." He whirled his fingers in the air and, with a sigh, Ana turned around, folding her arms in front of her chest.

"I've seen it all already."

"I said I was sorry!" He was. Not a hundred percent, since the shower had been built shoddily, but sorry nonetheless. But it was a train of thought best forgotten (because of a field facilities mishap resulting in not only a disintegrated shower but also in one of Gabriel's own flip-flops gaining a near escape velocity). Thankfully, Ana didn't intend to dwell on it.

"So, what do you think?"

"What do I what about what?" Gabriel paused with pants around his knees, convinced some finer points of Ana's question flew past his head with no context for the discussion they were apparently having right at this moment.

"We are lacking when it comes to a medical specialist, remember?"

No. Oh no. No way in hell and neither above, the sheer discomfort of having around someone who from the very start had that much dirt on him would slowly drive him at least a tad bit paranoid if not outright insane - but the rejection of Ana's proposal necessitated a careful and thought out strategy.

Not unlike crossing a minefield, situational sarcasm intended.

"If I remember, we'd agreed on putting in the requisition order for the attachment? We're going to have a pick then, not the first one that comes along," Gabriel stated matter-of-factly, buckling his belt.

"We will get cream of the crop of the fledglings straight out of the basic and that's why we've been putting it off." Ana turned around and gave Gabriel one raised eyebrow as he finished dressing. Having his own very reasonable arguments used against him sucked balls, honestly.

"This one looks like he might keel over any given moment if anything as much as looks at him wrong." He was flopping around with his reach like a hooked fish.

"He stitched you up on evac, with a broken nose, which, if I may add, you broke moments earlier, didn't you?"

Didn't help the situation that Ana smiled a smile of a cat that not only ate the canary - it gobbled up the whole aviary and left behind a satisfied kind of bloody carnage because it gave no fucks about being discovered and tried for its crimes against the avian folk.

"All slander," Gabriel muttered, "there's no proof."

"I'll testify. Anyway, he's got over a year of active and counting, knows what he's doing, and," Ana tapped her forearm with her fingers, "somehow forced you to take some bed rest, I can't imagine how."

"Threats of violence and embarrassment?"

"Now, that one I'd like to see myself." Ana slowly, with the affectation of a street performer, inspected Gabriel from head to toe, and then, with the same attention to the detail, back from toe to head. "I've sent you his file."

"Is there any way I can say no?" Gabriel groaned, moving out. Ana kept to his side.

"With compelling counterarguments because, at the moment, I'll take Francis over any star-struck rookie they're going to throw at us."

"God, his name's Francis? Doesn't look like one."

"It isn't. He goes by Jack."

"Well, with a name like Francis, I'm not surprised."

"Weren't you insisting a week ago 'Francis is a blessed name' because one 'Francis' made your favorite vampire movie?"

Ouch. Busted.

"That's different," Gabriel muttered. "Fine. Draft the request."

Ana shot him another smug feline smile.

"It's waiting for your signature."

"Fine. I'll think it over," he groused. "I promise nothing."

For the next fifteen minutes, Gabriel refused to acknowledge her presence hovering over his shoulder expectantly as everyone got onto the transport. When Rein asked about the date, and if he's invited to the ceremony, Gabriel suffered a near heart failure - at least until Rein added in his booming voice: ‘you punched his face in, it’s the least a guy deserves after that’.

"You're not invited," Gabriel bluntly retorted.

"It's a sore spot," Ana laughed. "The itty bitty medic hurt his pride."

"And neither are you," Gabriel hissed, looking around from his spot on the bench. "We're taking off and he's not onboard."

"He has five more minutes, Gabriel."

"That's five minutes too late."

"That's perfectly on time." The trash panda - Francis 'Jack' - mumbled as he climbed inside, looking like the only thing keeping him on his legs was his hand braced precariously on the side of the door. The other hand held loosely the straps of his dangling field backpack. He stumbled, focused his unseeing stare on some point on the wall (or well far past it), and then marched forward, swaying. The thrown pack landed on the floor and slid with momentum to stop under the bench, followed feet-first by Francis 'Jack' himself with the efficacy of a frequently repeated action. There, with everyone watching his every move, he propped his back and legs on bench supports and snuggled the backpack like it was his girl and he was just starting his leave.

In the ensuing silence, the first snore sounded louder than the obnoxious electronic bells of that one church Gabriel had the misfortune of having once lived by. Even the takeoff Ana okayed didn't disturb the supposedly peaceful sleep of the trash panda, who was now in active violation of at least three regulations that Gabriel actually knew. Amazed, he observed the phenomenon quietly.

"Fine. You won. He's in."

"Told you," Ana smirked.

[bluemagic-girl]

Liverpool 0-3 Napoli: Woeful pre-season continues for Reds as they are well beaten by Italian side

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If Liverpool had played as shoddily as this the very last time they confronted Napoli then they would not be European champions.

That was at Anfield in December when a Mo Salah aim sent the Reds by way of to the final-16 at the price of the Italians, who wanted only a attract.

Had Napoli striker Arkadiusz Milik concluded as confidently that night as he did listed here then they would have experienced that level.

Lorenzo Insigne broke the deadlock at Murrayfield by curling neatly into the significantly right corner

The Napoli indigenous jumped in the air to rejoice putting his aspect in front in the friendly

Fabinho reacted in pure frustration as Liverpool continued to present lapses in their defence

Milik was thoroughly clean through in the 93rd minute in December only for goalkeeper Alisson to generate an outrageous help save that stored Liverpool on study course for a sixth European title.

MATCH Info: 

Liverpool: Mignolet, Alexander-Arnold (Gomez), Matip (Lovren), Van Dijk (Van den Berg), Robertson (Hoever), Fabinho (Duncan), Henderson (Lallana), Milner (Elliot), Wijnaldum (Lewis), Oxlade-Chamberlain (Wilson), Origi (Brewster)

Unused subs: Lonergan

Napoli: Meret, Di Lorenzo (Hysaj), Maksimovic (Luperto), Manolas (Chiriches), Rui (Ghoulam), Callejon, Zielinski, Verdi (Gaetano), Mertens (Younes), Insigne, Milik (Tutino)

Unused subs: Idasiak, Karnezis,  

Aims: Insigne (17), Milik (29), Younes (52)

But the big Pole created no miscalculation this time when nonchalantly flicking further than Simon Mignolet for Napoli’s 2nd purpose just before the half hour.

That early lead, nor the 3- entire-time score, did not flatter the readers. It explained substantially that Liverpool’s ideal hard work came courtesy of a Napoli defender who inadvertently turned toward his base corner and was spared by a diving preserve from Alex Meret. 

That aside, Jurgen Klopp’s side available almost nothing in assault. The midfield and defence weren’t successful any awards possibly.

There is a good deal to be of concern for Klopp appropriate now and the return of Salah, Sadio Mane and Roberto Firmino – all afforded extended breaks – are not able to arrive before long enough.

Certainly, pre-season outcomes should be taken flippantly but performances significantly less so, and this was a pretty bad overall performance. It lacked creativeness and electricity – the hallmarks of their excellent season – and was stained even more by a worrying sloppiness.

Klopp admits the welcome they been given outside the house Murrayfield was as good as it obtained.

‘The reception was exceptional, extraordinary. That was the positive component,’ stated the Reds boss.

‘The activity was not good. We conceded uncomplicated objectives. We lost the ball. You have to have to have everything much better. We need to make better conclusions and have a far better formation. It was not superior.

‘If opponents want to analyse us now then they will say it is an uncomplicated task. But we will be a unique animal when the period commences.’

Liverpool taken care of this as a property helpful – even creating the matchday programme – and the welcome the staff coach gained on its arrival at Murrayfield was as raucous as those people noticed on Merseyside, the pink shirts hanging from the concourse stairwells as the bus crawled towards the stadium’s entrance.

You could have been forgiven, nonetheless, for imagining that Liverpool did not change up at all. The highlight for those supporters was arguably a pre-match rendition of ‘Allez, Allez, Allez’, done by Jamie Webster from the roof of the stadium.

Arkadiusz Milik (right) scored the second target of the sport to put Napoli in comprehensive regulate

But the group was heading nowhere quickly and the tone was established for a woeful very first 50 percent when, on 3 minutes, Divock Origi flicked huge from six yards owning been picked out by Scotland captain Andy Robertson. 

It was as if Origi, so often the tremendous-sub last year, was not fully comfy with this starting up job. He’ll be again on the bench quickly adequate with finishing like that.

He was not the only a single guilty of such complacency. Skipper Jordan Henderson was caught napping on the ball and, even when he was a lot more warn, his distribution was errant.

As for Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, the winger creating his way back again from a significant knee personal injury. 

Perfectly, if you might be becoming variety you would argue he can only get much better. If you’re less forgiving then you would worry what influence that devastating injury has had. He looked short of contact, velocity and self-assurance right here.

Scottish supporters turned out in drive but the stadium went flat with Liverpool nicely at the rear of

Virgil van Dijk led a defensive inquest following the Reds had been effortlessly punished by Napoli’s strikers

Amin Younes (centre) scored the third for the Italian side as they ongoing to dominate

And all of this showed for the duration of a very first fifty percent in which the fantastic left-winger Lorenzo Insigne led Liverpool a merry dance, and that did not communicate very well for ideal back again Trent Alexander-Arnold possibly.

Insigne curled the opener from 20-yards on 14 minutes just after Origi dropped the ball and Belgium midfielder Dries Mertens set his workforce-mate obvious with a stupendous sliced throughball with the outside of his boot. Klopp was not happy, using issue with Virgil van Dijk in certain.

But the German manager could not even muster the will to berate his gamers soon after Napoli’s 2nd goal, in its place standing with his toes unfold wide and palms driving his again in a resigned stance of disappointment.

Before long, while, he was on the case of Oxlade-Chamberlain and he bowed his head in despair when an Alexander-Arnold pass whistled straight out of play.

Jurgen Klopp has plenty continue to to consider about with Liverpool enduring a woeful pre-time

Liverpool’s 16-calendar year-old signing Harvey Elliott performed his to start with video game because going from Fulham

It was three on 52 minutes following that guy Insigne observed his shot parried by Mignolet and the ball bounced to Amin Younes, who prodded in from six yards.

Mercifully, for Liverpool, the Italians eased in the closing levels, for it could nicely have been much more.

A person plus did arise for Liverpool and that was the sight of Harvey Elliot making his debut late on, the 16-12 months-old acquiring only arrived from Fulham on the morning of the activity.

It is his senior comrades, having said that, who need to have to sharpen up before future weekend’s opener in opposition to Manchester Town in the Group Defend.

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[boystownbirdie]

LMWTV4U: GOT S7E7

Welcome back to Let me watch TV 4 U? The blog where I watch TV for YOU! Last night was the season 7 finale of Game of Thrones. What happened? LET’S FIND OUT! Spoilers ahead you’ve been warned. You’ve also been warned that you are about to be #SHOOKETH. 

Again, I was fully #shook the entire second half of this ep. But the first half was less shocking, so let’s get that out of the way first, shall we?

We open on Greyworm and the rest of the Unsullied army…

And they are in #formation on the lawn of King’s Landing. Jaime and Bronn watch from a tower and discuss dicks and basically conclude that dicks make the world go ‘round which is A. GARBAGE and B. WELCOME TO THE SEASON OF THE KWEENS. Also Bronn oversees the Lannister army’s production of “pitch” which I’m assuming is like tar (I know this from Into the Woods, thanks Sondheim!). What is this pitch for? IDK it’s never mentioned again! During their dick-discussion, the Dothraki forces ride up on their horses through the Unsullied formation and J and B are, frankly, spooked.

While the Unsullied and Dothraki approach by land, the big wigs ride in by sea. We’ve got Tyrion, Previously-Traumatized-Theon (PTT), Sleevey, Bae, No-Knuckles (NK), Stoney, and Missi on deck. Down below, the Hound checks to make sure the ice zombie they obtained last week is still zombie-ing. As they approach, Theon’s Uncle Crazy-Pants (UCP) has his whole fleet of ships guarding King’s Landing. We check in quickly with Queen Pixie Cut (QPC) who is reminding her zombie-bodyguard, The Mountain, to kill everyone please.

As we approach the GoT-Model-UN, Bronn strolls up with Ladyknight and her squire, Pod on one side and are met by Tyrion and the rest of #TeamKhaleesi at a fork in the road. Pod and Tyrion and Bronn all used to be besties, so it’s kind of weird for them to be meeting like this, but OH WELL we’ve got ice zombies to discuss! The Hound and Ladyknight reunite which is cute because last time they met she left him for dead. They both chat about how they are proud that their little Arya has grown up to be a skilled assassin.

They approach the Courtyard by Marriott presents, the DRAGONPIT space that QPC has rented for their Model-UN conference, which is actually a giant pit where the Targaryens used to keep their dragons. It looks like one of those stadiums that was shoddily-built for the Olympics 25 years ago but has not been touched since. #TeamKhaleesi and #TeamBae all take their seats and then QPC and co. roll up with Uncle Crazy Pants. We get a reminder that the Mountain and the Hound (who are brothers) do NOT like each other. QPC is like, umm… Where’s Khaleesi? And then in the least surprising entrance ever Khaleesi flies in on Dragon #1 with Dragon #2 in tow and is like, what? Am I late?

Uncle Crazy Pants has to remind us all that he’s crazy and rather than let the grown-ups chat, he yells at his nephew PTT and is like, hey, I still have your sister, remember? Tyrion tries to steer the convo back to Model-UN business but then UCP goes on a rant about how he hates dwarves until QPC is finally like shut all the way up, UCP. Tyrion and Bae co-present the case for their country in this model-UN, Khaleesi-ville. There’s a lot of back and forth but T makes a very good point when he says there’s “no conversation that will erase the last 50 years.”

Their presentation concludes with a real-life-3D-representation of the threat to their country, an ice zombie fresh from beyond the wall! The Hound sets him loose and he comes right for QPC’s face. She looks truly horrified while her “Maester” (who is into human experiments and keeping dead people alive unnaturally) is kinda turned on? Bae shows us that the 2 things that can destroy the ice zombie are fire and dragonglass, thus completing his presentation. Good job, Bae, A+ and extra points for visuals!

UCP is not having this and is like, can ice zombies swim? Bae’s like, naw dawg they cannot. So UCP is like k, BAI and peaces out. He and his people live on an island so they’re safe from ice zombies as long as they stay put. Since Khaleesi recently purchased an island-condo, he advises her to do the same. QPC agrees to a truce with #teamKhaleesi on the condition that Bae heads back to Winterfell and not “choose a side” between Khaleesi and QPC. It seems like a good deal but Bae is like sorry I already chose a side I’m #teamKhaleesi til I die (again). QPC is like k, kewl, bai and her whole crew leaves without deciding on their model-UN resolution. Ladyknight appeals to her old pal Jaime to have some common sense but he is too #inlurve with his sister to listen.

Everyone left at the Courtyard by Marriott is like Bae couldn’t you just have told a little lie to QPC? And he’s like naw, not a liar. Can’t do it. Tyrion is like ok well I’ll go talk to my sis, she’ll probs kill me but, it’s been a fun life! Meanwhile, Khaleesi and Bae get a little heart-to-heart where she AGAIN mentions that she can’t have children and he’s like well who said that? And she’s like oh this witch doctor lady who killed my first husband. And Bae is like, she wasn’t even a licensed medical professional, what does she know!?

Tyrion and Jaime have a quick moment of brotherly love before T goes to see QPC. T is like, ok sis, just kill me. Your giant zombie-bodyguard is here just give the order and have me killed. And then she doesn’t kill him. Instead, she declines his glass of wine because she is #drinkingfortwo now, that’s right, she preggers (or at least she claims to be). Somehow, telling Tyrion about her pregnancy leads her to change her mind so she returns to the Courtyard by Marriott to tell the crew that she will have her armies march North to face the “great war” of the ice zombies. Huzzah! Our mission is complete. OR IS IT?

Let’s pop into Winterfell, shall we?

Sansa finds out that Bae #boweddown to Khaleesi via a very informative letter and discusses this with Littlefinger. LF is like well, I guess Bae is a traitor now so maybe you should be in charge? And she’s like hmmm… but my sister is acting weird. And then he tries to tell her that her sis wants to kill her to become the “Lady of Winterfell” and take power. She’s like, well… I guess I better do something about that. A few scenes later, Sansa is busy looking out at the winter-y landscape and tells a guard to have her sister, Arya, brought to the Great Hall.

In the Great Hall, Arya walks into a room filled with judgy-looking dudes in pointy hats and is like, did I miss something? And Sansa is like well… there is a traitor in our midst. And Arya is like, oh really, bitch? We gonna go there? And Sansa is like yep, you’re accused of treason, murder, and conspiring to kill your leader……… LITTLEFINGER!

WHAT? TABLES TURNED BIOTCH YOU ARE DONE LITTLEFINGER.

LF tries to talk his way out of this one but it turns out the sisters have been plotting against him all along and there’s nothing he can say that can combat that. Plus Bran is there and he can see the past so he offers some helpfully incriminating testimony against Littlefinger. LF is down on his knees begging Sansa for his life and she’s like #boibye, do it sis. And Arya cuts his throat! And then he is dead-o as dead as any dead thing that ever died. I truly cheered out loud at this scene. Like, I should have seen it coming but I didn’t. Thank you, GoT, for not only killing off a main character, but one we all wanted to see die anyway! Later, we get a scene where Arya and Sansa fully make up and are friends again, TG!

Back to #teamKhaleesi...

they’re debating travel plans to head North. Stoney is like, Khaleesi you should take the dragon express, but Bae is like no, sail on a boat wit me. And Khaleesi is FEELING BAE so she’s like sorry, Stoney, gotta get that D. Then we have a sweet scene where Bae and PTT resolve their past differences and PTT is like wow you are one good dude, Bae.

Inspired by this convo, PTT heads to the boats to ask the small crew of his sister’s sailor-guys to sail with him to save his sis from UCP. The main sailor dude is like NOPE, you heard UCP, we’re heading to an island! PTT is like NOT TODAY, SATAN, and he starts fighting the main sailor dude. After taking several punches and getting back up again (that, ladies and gentlemen, is what we call tub-thumping (thanks Kimmy Schmidt), when you get back down but you get up again), PTT is hit hard in the groin by the main sailor dude but jokes on him cuz PTT is like a Ken-Doll down there! PTT uses this momentum to wipe out sailor dude and after beating him up, rallies the troops to go save his sister! Good job, PTT!

Back in King’s Landing…

Jaime is ordering the Lannister forces to head up North to fight the ice zombies when QPC walks in and is like lol wut? Jaime’s like just doing what we agreed to do at the Model UN conference! QPC is like, oh that’s sweet, you thought I was serious? I’m not gonna make a truce with Khaleesi! I’m gonna move in as soon as her troops head North! And Jaime is like how? We don’t have an army! And she’s like oh remember when UCP said he was going to leave and head back to the Iron Islands- psych!- he’s heading to the other side of the world to bring the “Golden Company” (a huge army of soldiers for hire that QPC bought with all that Tyrell gold) back here.

Jaime is NOT PLEASED because A. he wants them to keep their word and B. he’s like if these ice zombies win we’re all f$%-ed and C. QPC kept him in the dark about all of this. He’s like I know you murdered thousands of innocent people in a church and you’ve been 100% evil for the past 5 seasons, but this is the LAST STRAW. And he goes to leave and she’s nobody walks away from me and her zombie-knight is there. And Jaime is like ok, kill me. Which is cuckoo because this is the second time in this episode where QPC is faced with a brother saying “ok, have your zombie knight kill me then” and each time she doesn’t do it.

So Jaime storms off and it seems like he is finally dunzo with his twin sis/lover and is headed...North? IDK? As he is leaving King’s Landing, though, SNOW STARTS TO FALL whoa #winteriscoming #vintagenedstark #amiright ladies?

Let’s check in on Winterfell again!

Sam arrives with Gilly and bb Sam and comes to see the artist formerly known as Bran Stark aka The 3-eyed Raven. Bran tells Sam he is the 3-eyed Raven now and Sam’s like….k? And Bran is like I need to see Bae to tell him about his parents. Bran is being a real know-it-all which is I guess his gig now and he’s like he’s not Jon Snow, he’s Jon Sand, he was a bastard born in Dorne (Dornish bastards have the last name Sand instead of Snow cuz of the climate) to Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark. And Sam is like HOLD THE PHONE I just remembered that Gilly read aloud from this old dude’s diary that Lyanna and Rhaegar were legally married and he got offish divorced from his first wife!

And then Bran goes back in time and watches the marriage and is like yep it happened and meanwhile he’s narrating all of this, Khaleesi and Bae are on a ship headed North when he knocks on her door late at night. She lets him in and then before we even get to witness their first kiss they are #doingit that’s right straight up boning and fully nude. It is very hawt but also we are confirming that she is his aunt at the same time. And Tyrion, meanwhile, watched Bae go into Khaleesi’s room and is feeling some kinda way about it?!?

I’m too verklempt to describe the sensuality of these 2 beautiful people in the nude so let’s cut to our last scene. Gingerbae and Eyepatch are still at Eastwatch when GB spots a bunch of ice zombies walking up to the wall. He’s like oh snap they are very close now we better get our shit together. And then ICE ZOMBIE DRAGON flies up, with the Night King on his back and BURNS DOWN A HUGE SECTION OF THE ICE WALL WITH HIS FIRE/ICE BREATH!?!?!?! GB and Eyepatch seem to be ok but now, we have for the first time ever, a bajillion ice zombies who’ve successfully crossed into the realm of the living and are really, definitely coming for all of us. END OF EPISODE.

Phew thanks so much for reading! Sorry bout my technical difficulties. I’ll see you next season!