#and intersex rights are human rights

[stopper-my-heart]

"Nick/Charlie & Arthur/Merlin (AU Past Lives) – [Taylor Swift's] 'Timeless'" by @imagine-dragonlords

This is a Heartstopper blog and will remain a Heartstopper-only blog 99% of the time.

But this video really hits me hard.

Imagining a hypothetical historical Merlin-and-Arthur trying to be together and the meta level of remembering what it was like with the BBC / world and Merthur as recently as 2012, compared with having Heartstopper on Netflix and Nick & Charlie now.. There's so much further we have to go, but I have a lot of feelings about the progress we've made, too.

Also: "I'd like to think we'd find each other in any universe".

------------

This post was originally going to end there but then I discovered this Merthur fanfic by @queerofthedagger and it's a perfect antidote to the video and goes towards healing my Merthur-broken heart.

The fanfic shows what Merlin and Arthur could've been if they'd had the time and freedom to talk about the things that matter. They become so "Nick & Charlie" in it and it's glorious. Also, Merlin's mum = Sarah Nelson. I think you'll need to have watched and cared about BBC Merlin to appreciate it, but recently isn't necessary (10+ years is fine).

The author has their own summary that you can find on the page, but I think this sums it up very well:

Happiness is bubbling in his chest, his blood singing with it and this, this is what they’re supposed to be. Carving their own way and finding alternate routes to be themselves, without being tied down and crushed underneath some distant destiny* that cares nothing for them.

*or the BBC, society, etc.

Below the jump are content warnings for the fic plus some quotations from it that remind me of Nick & Charlie, which are more for my sake than anyone else's.

CW: violence, murderous intent, 1 non-graphic sex scene (near the beginning of ch. 13, easy to skip)

Quotations:

“You don’t have a weapon,” he says because Merlin might’ve turned him into a lovestruck fool, but he’s never going to stop poking and prodding him to make up for it. Of course, it would be far easier if one symptom of said lovestruck condition wasn’t that it clearly makes him as much of an idiot as Merlin loves to claim he is.

-----------------

“You’re brilliant,” he breathes into the safety of Merlin’s hair, revelling in the way Merlin tightens his grip on him. “It’s brilliant.”

-----------------

“I—yeah no, I’d rather not,” Merlin agrees, though there’s something resigned lurking in the black of his eyes. “I’m—” “If the next word is 'sorry,' Merlin, I advise you to stop right there.”

-----------------

“You’d miss me!” Arthur calls, having to raise his voice for Merlin to hear him over the distance as he’s walking away. He gets a rude hand gesture in response, and he can only be thankful that there’s no one else around to witness the grin splitting his face.

-----------------

“Maybe it is,” he cuts in, shrugging. “But not so much that you have to sacrifice your own happiness for it. You’re—can’t you see how important you are, simply because you’re you? Because of what you mean to me and how you make my life better?" [...] It’s so much more than he meant to say, but he doesn’t regret a single word of it. He would say it a hundred times over if it got Merlin to finally believe it.

AKA Sports Day speech -----------------

The clarity of what, truly, is the root of the problem hits Arthur like a punch. “Gods, you—Merlin. Merlin, you don’t have to make up for it,” he croaks out, his voice cracking and breaking. He shifts closer, pressing his forehead against Merlin’s, and he can feel Merlin’s shallow breathing against his chest. “It’s not a burden, alright? It’s not a burden, and you aren’t a burden, and I will fight anyone who dares to tell you otherwise.”

-----------------

His whole body is singing with it, his skin feeling too small to contain the magnitude of emotions rushing through him, and he has to break the kiss before it overwhelms him entirely.

Insert Nick gasping for dear life breath -----------------

Arthur keeps his eyes closed, their foreheads still pressed together, trying desperately to not unravel at the seams. He’s almost afraid that this is a dream, that he’s going to wake up any second now, with Merlin still close but not like this. Not like Arthur has been craving for aeons.

In which Arthur is also Charlie -----------------

Arthur splutters, though he doubts that it sounds anywhere as indignant as he’d like it to. “How could I not know? If you recall, I was the one who kissed you first, all those months back when we were travelling to Ynys Gybi.” “Yes, and then you never brought it up again.” “Because you never brought it up again. I thought that you simply wanted to forget about it, or that I crossed a line!” Merlin huffs out a laugh, but his eyes are still brimming with affection. “I thought you regretted it,” he says quietly, lips quirked at the corners. “I thought you were just panicking, and that if you had meant it, you would’ve said something.”

A.k.a. conversation in Charlie's bedroom after their first kiss (except it's later on here) -----------------

Hunith takes one look at them the next morning before she smirks. “Finally figured it out, did you?” Arthur promptly chokes on his food, coughing and spluttering as his face grows warm. Merlin isn’t much better off, even the tips of his ears turning red, though at least he’s spared the coughing fit.

In which Hunith continues to be Sarah Nelson (or the Sarah Nelson Charlie expects, anyway) -----------------

Snow starts falling in big flakes about an hour in, and Arthur didn’t count on how much of a distraction it would be. It catches in Merlin’s hair and his lashes, a stark contrast to the black of it, and his eyes appear even brighter than usual. It’s a struggle to not drag him off and kiss the crystals of ice off his face, and Arthur can’t remember when he’s become such a terrible, utter sap. That is, until he steps out of Hunith’s house after lunch, just about warmed up from the thick stew she made, and a snowball hits him straight in the face.

If Nick & Charlie's Snow Day came slightly later. Or maybe this is just the same -----------------

[intersexfairy]

PCOS is an intersex variation, full stop. The reason that's controversial is that just accepting it as one undermines the gender and sex binaries.

The idea that we're just rare mutants that need to be fixed, or can be ignored for the sake of the majority, would further begin to fall apart. Recognizing people with PCOS as intersex makes it harder for them to treat people with PCOS like broken women.

Doctors treat their intersex traits as a malady that needs to be fixed. Even in the case of a cis women with PCOS and gender dysphoria or health issues, the treatment is so often laced with intersexism and coercion. There is no real choice given, and no affirmation of one's body as worthy of respect regardless of what it looks like.

This isn't unusual in the treatment of intersex people - people do try to hide from us the fact we're intersex (entirely, or by saying we have a disorder instead). But by not even considering people with PCOS under the umbrella, they prevent them from finding community with people like them, and advocating for themselves.

This is all to say, people with PCOS are not less intersex than other intersex people. They are just as intersex, and face all the scrutiny that comes with it. But more than that, they are integral to intersex liberation - and queer liberation overall. Your story as an intersex person with PCOS matters. We need you, and we want you with us.

May you find peace, community, and healing. May you find comfort and home in your body. May you find health and wellness. You are loved, and you belong - just as you are, and have yet to become.

Sincerely, a trans intersex person who doesn't know if it's PCOS or something else.

[oarfishing]

Alright, I'm sick of seeing TERFisms on my dash, so here's a handy list of TERF dogwhistles and talking points to think about before you reblog a post.

I've seen a few of these before, but it doesn't hurt to make more. Especially when we're seeing a lot of radfem rhetoric popping up in LGBT spaces from people who might not know better.

SCREENNAMES: these are terms that commonly appear in radfem usernames across the web

rad or radical

fem or femme

vulva, clit, uterus, womb, ovary, vagina, etc.

febfem

anything along the lines of "angry woman"

xx or chromosomes

wombyn, wimmin, womyn, etc.

LGB

feminist

BIOS: things that show up in radfem bios

♀ or ⚢

febfem

female separatist

female, human female, adult human female

xx

something along the lines of "the scary feminist you were warned about"; being an angry woman, being sick of being silenced, being an evil woman, being an angry lesbian

detrans (NOTE: detrans people are absolutely not always transphobic)

dysphoric female

males/men do not interact

LGB✂️

misandrist

feminist (NOTE: again, very few feminists are actually terfs, but this is commonly in terf bios alongside some of these other terms)

TERMS: terms that radfems use in their circles

TIM - trans-identified male, a way of saying transfems, trans women, and other trans people

TIF - trans-identified female, same as above but the other way around, less commonly seen

DSD - disorder of sexual development, a way to avoid saying intersex and to categorize intersex people as "still male or female" (you might see "males with DSD" or "females with DSD" for example)

females or males instead of women and men

alternatively, women and males to dehumanize men

"peaking" or "peaked" - referring to becoming radicalized as a radfem or TERF

womyn, wombyn, wimmin, wo**n, and any other spelling that takes "man" out of the term woman

mentally ill men/women

sex-based oppression

gender critical

"TIRF" - trans-inclusive radical feminist (don't be fooled by the name, they're very much not)

TRA - trans rights activist, derogatory

sex-based rights

female separatism/"women's land"

WBW - womyn-born womyn

autistic girls/children

troon - (ridiculous) slur for trans people

RHETORIC: general ideological themes in radfem rhetoric

men are inherently more violent than women

women don't or rarely rape men

(woman on woman rape is ignored by almost all radfems)

being nonbinary is a way to "stop being" your assigned sex while still acting as your birth sex

lesbians are not attracted to men/penises and can never have sex with men/penises (otherwise, you're bisexual)

men can and will never be lesbians

there is no such thing as a bi lesbian, only lesbians and bisexuals. labels are rigid and sex-based

all of the world's suffering is driven by men

women would be better off separate

an all-female society is utopia

sex is binary, and intersex people are "glitches" or "still male or female but DisorderedTM"

men should expect to be feared by women

female/female relationships are safer and more pure than straight or gay male relationships

men and women are more different than similar

intersex people should not be allowed in sports

intersex people and trans men are never in men's sports

terrible world events wouldn't have happened if women were in charge

men are stupid and aggressive

being a man is not a positive thing

men's problems are lesser than women's

penises are disgusting and vaginas and vulvas are beautiful

trans women are performing at being girls

trans men see themselves as above lesbians

attraction is sex-based

porn is rape

porn is inherently violent

watching porn makes you predisposed to inflicting abuse

BDSM is inherently violent and misogynistic

transitioning children (whether socially or medically) are being abused

"bitch" and "cunt" are slurs against women

only gay men can say faggot and only lesbian women can say dyke

When you see a few or more of these together, RUN! It's a terf.

[theenbyroiderer]

In honor of Intersex Awareness Day, here's an in progress pic of this project from last year.

[usernamesarehard1]

This is serious. We CANNOT let project 2025 happen. I dont think a lot of people really understand how horrible another Trump presidency would be.

KEEP TRUMP OUT OF OFFICE

STOP PROJECT 2025

THIS IS SO FUCKING IMPORTANT

[queerism1969]

[native-orchid]

I'm writing a book called "Navigating Modern Medicine From Outside the Binary" and it's currently listed for #presale from GreasyGrass Cooperative Press, the first Indigenous-led nonprofit printing cooperative of its kind.

I've been a part of GreasyGrass since the beginning, and am thrilled to announce that we also have an Intersex Visibility/Pride pack that is here just in time for Intersex Awareness Day, which is October 26.

greasygrasspress.vip

[actuallymoon]

I really dgaf about sports and the Olympics, but I just saw the tweets JKR posted. I can’t really stay silent on her nonsense, especially since her words hit me hard as a woman with PCOS.

JKR claims to be this "great feminist” standing for women against “transgender ideology" then goes and attacks a cis woman of color because she has a genetic disorder.

It is so stupid to claim that being born with different hormones means that you're automatically of the opposite gender.

I'm also a woman who produces excessive amounts of testosterone and did look ‘manly’ for a certain period of my life. I remember going through something similar to male puberty. Instead of menstruating, I got thick, dense facial and body hair, my jaw got wider and my acne worsened.

That's when the vicious rumors about me being a "fake girl". It pressured me to start taking hormones at an early age (13). Kids lacked basic decency because of their immaturity, but to have a grown ass woman bullying an athlete is just horrific. I seriously can’t put how I felt when I saw that stupid terf call a cis woman ‘a man’ into words.

It's also racist and sexist to assume woman = dainty and frail. It's mostly WOC who have increased levels of testosterone and maintaining that sexist stereotype affects us the most.

And please don’t get me started on how that Italian boxer is a racist cop with links to the FAR RIGHT. Would I be taking it too far to say that she quit on purpose so she could sabotage the reputation of Imane 🤔 I don’t think so…

In summary, fuck JKR. I stand with Imane Khelif.

[razzafrazzle]

strange old men!! theyre married for tax purposes (and gay purposes but thats less important)

[image description: a drawing of human designs for coach z and bubs from homestar runner. coach z is depicted as a lanky pale-skinned older man with a tooth gap, a five-o'clock shadow, and balding curly light brown hair with a grey streak through it. bubs is depicted as a bulky, dark-skinned older man with short greying afro hair and a short beard. end id]

[mimilikesunicorns]

On the 17th day of Pride month-

I hope you realise that if you are queer and in a hetero-presenting relationship, it doesn't diminish your queer identity. You are valid.

My song recommendation of the day<3

Happy Pride peeps~

[intersexfairy]

it's not intersexist to acknowledge that intersexness can result from a health condition or be related to one. intersex is an umbrella term for a variety of experiences, including ones involving disability, and it's okay and important to admit that. we don't gain anything by throwing intersex people who experience complications from their variation/related condition under the bus.

but even beyond that, we don't have to separate ourselves from disability in order to prove we deserve human rights. our variations being linked to chronic illness wouldn't mean that all the medical abuse towards us is founded. disabled and intersex people all have a right to bodily autonomy and proper healthcare that needs to be upheld.

even if our sex nonconformity were somehow universally an illness, intersex and disabled people have a right to exist. just as much as abled and dyadic people do. there is no "proving" that we have human rights - that is something we all inherently have.

[intervex]

Three models of intersex

I made flags to illustrate different models of intersex, in the vein of models of disability.

At top: intersex human rights. The human rights model: intersex people are a minority group whose human rights are being violated. The dove symbol used in the middle of the intersex flag is a common symbol of human rights. Advocacy for intersex rights include creating legal protections for intersex people to ensure bodily integrity, medical autonomy, and anti-discrimination.

Bottom left: intersex liberation (interliberationism). The identity/radical model: there's nothing wrong with being intersex. Like other queer identities, intersex has been unfarily medicalized. Similar to how gayness has been de-medicalized and trans people are working towards de-medicalization, intersex needs to be de-pathologized.

The clenched fist is a common symbol of liberation movements. I posted this flag earlier - I took the fist from a transfeminist symbol, in recognition of the shared struggles between intersex & trans liberation.

Bottom right: intermedicalism. The medical model: intersex is a medical problem in need of treatment (and potentially: cure). The plus symbol is a reference to the transmedicalism flag. I wanna note that every intermedicalist I've met is against IGM and other violations of bodily autonomy. Intermedicalists advocate for better, *patient-responsive* care for intersex people.

The medical model and the liberationist model aren't really seen as compatible.

But the human rights model is compatible with *both* models: whether you understand intersex as disorder or not, intersex people deserve human rights. 💜

(Tagging for archival: @intersexflags @varsex-pride @radiomogai )

[metalheadsforblacklivesmatter]

THIS. THIS IS WHY I TALK ABOUT INTERSEX PEOPLE IN RELATION TO TRANS ISSUES.

YOU CAN'T JUST LABEL PERFECTLY HEALTHY INTERSEX PEOPLE AS DISABLED AND FORCE THEM TO USE SEPARATE ACCOMMODATIONS.

NOT ONLY IS THAT INTERSEXPHOBIC BUT ITS ABELIST AS HELL.

TERFs get SO MAD. "Stop pulling intersex people into your trans agenda." NO. I'M NOT PULLING THEM INTO MY AGENDA. NOT ONLY IS THIS TRANSPHOBIC, BUT ITS LITERALLY ATTACKING INTERSEX PEOPLE.

-fae

[genitalkenobi]

I made a giant queer necklace!!!!!

[thatweirddolldude]

Transgender people will only be free from the oppression of purity if intersex people are free to live in the bodies they were born in without being mutilated at birth and forced onto hrt while they are pubesing.

Transgender people will never be allowed a true trigender spectrum until intersex people are recgonized intersex at birth.

Transgender people will never be equal until intersex people are no longer just a medical term and no longer considered a deformity.