#and im not even talking about bts
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God the more i try to stick around 911twt the more i hate it.
That platform was NOT made for fandom and I will die on that hill.
#leon rambles#and im not even talking about bts#since i can judt block those#buddietwt has some of the most annoying people ive ever had the displeasure of sharing an interest with#there is a huge lack of fandom etiquette there that it’s driving me#crazy#the fact that i have to witness people shitting on fic writers daily#like no fam#fic writers aren’t writing for you#they’re writing fir themselves and sharing that stuff for FREE for likeminded people#you can just move on when yiu see a tag you don’t like#this is such common knowledge in fandom and it’s driving me crazy that i see people being shit about this daily
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LOOK WHAT CAME IN!!!!!!
I took these just cause I'm so excited about it!!! but I figured other people might want to read it too :) (I know Fangoria hasn't released it in the archives yet) so enjoy! and I'm sorry about the glare ;_;
#it came in 3 weeks early im so excited#havent even taken my work uniform off yet and i already read it#arahsjsiabsshsns#its so good#it came out Sept 2004- a month before Saw's release- so it's James and Leigh talking about meeting and behind the scenes of production#i want to roll this up and chew on it oh my goddddddd#saw 2004#fangoria 236#james wan#leigh whannell#saw bts#shawnee smith
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DAY 200: SOPECHWITA
#sope#jhope#SUGA#Jung Hoseok#Min Yoongi#Suchwita#BTS#방탄소년단#sketchbook#hoseok roulette art challenge#im laughing they didn't even talk about huh but i felt it was appropriate w the faces they were making jdgfkn#my gOD I LOVE THEM#I needed this
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i hope you feel better soon. seeing your bucktommy and 9-1-1 posts on my dash is one of my favorite things here. sending you a hug 💕
thank you, nonny. the power this show has over me is massive so i don't wanna speak too soon but i can safely say that making bucktommy posts or even thinking about them is so down at the bottom of my priorities right now. i simply don't feel a gram of excitement about them in the current greater context of the show.
i'll feel better in a couple of weeks but i don't know whether my interest that's been killed last night will ever come back. again, thanks for enjoying my presence tho 🫶
#thinking about dropping my two wips and leaving lol but also everythings pissing me off rn so that's impacting things#i know if i didnt have tommy/bt filtered out right now it'd sour my feelings even more so im still trying to preserve smth here so we'll se#also im a tenderhearted bitch and i already mourn the friendships i will lose here bc i cant engage with the common discourse anymore#Mimi talks#911posting#911 spoilers
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all about the cringe does not exist be free until its me❤️
#why does wanting to talk about ur interests always feel so shameful and embarrassing to me GUH#EVEN JUST THINKING ABIUT THEM#thanks social isolation and ppl bullying me or moving away due to how i am and especially my interests#i litwrally forgot HOW to talk about my interests#this isn't me asking rn to talk about it cuz i need sleep I just wanted to get it out❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#im literally on tumblr dot com afraid to engage with my interest. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK#this is about sonic mind u#and bts tbh i am coming back.#and im proud of that that period shows pride not shame#ok enough bye#rumaiq rambles
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this is the worst thing thats ever happened for me
(for context the pic on the top left, and other image in this post, is a pic of mine and i came across a twitter post including it when i was looking to see if any of my personal screenshots had been reposted elsewhere because. idk i was curious)
#im being dramatic but what do you MEAN a random ass twitter post with 90k impressions is using a screenshot of mine.#like this is so weird to me#the thought of people outside of my small fandom space and my mutuals seeing shit i post is so scary#like i know it just happens. i feel like im a little kid finding out about the internet for the first time by saying this#but still its so weird..#its just a gane screenshot. its not like my home address is on twitter dot com#but still. i just posted that shit to pinterest like 9 months ago to try and get more people to appreciate style savvy#i talked abt this on discord aswell. like being perceived bt people im not close with is my biggest fear#even if its just a twitter account using a pic from my nsb save file#style boutique#style savvy
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it’s tough be a top masc in an x fem!reader, tw daddy kink, manhandling, kitten, choking world
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I used to draw
#bts#park jimin#kim namjoon#jung hoseok#ive been feelinh very mentally unwell for probably the last 4 months to a year ngl#and i talked to a friend today just looking for advice#because i dont actually have any real hardships in my life#i have a great job#i have a great apartment#i did everything i was supposed to in college#i have so many many great great friends#but this whole becoming an adult thing is just very isolating#and i talked to my friend and she said i should go on a walk#but yk my apartment is surrounded by not 1 but 2 cemeteries#rip wei wuxian you wouldve loved it#so i drove out to the university and paid for parking#and my headphones were dead#so now im just walking the river#and im sitting on a cool little deck under some trees#and i thought about how i used to draw#when i graduated college in 2021 i felt much the same as i do now#very very unhappy#and really afraid of getting older#and even today im so mad that im still not in college#and rn im sitting at a college that isnt even my own#but hey i used to draw and that made me feel really good#i actually never drew until 2021 and really suprised myself at how good i was#i have yoongi piece i stopped because i got busy with grad school and work#but maybe ill go back to it#berry agenda rise
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i need to fuckign explode
#i need to talk tohim i need to talk to him i need to talk to him i need to tlak to him but i caaaaaaaaaaaaaaant bc im too scared of that lol#it was on my mind two months ago it was on my mind a month ago and its on my mind now and it is driving me insane#bjt k dont want to say what it is because thats a can of worms of potential for people to Know i dont want#so glad the guy in question is locked out of tumblr and the other guy involved barely looks at tumblr#only fucking place i can get this thought out even vaguely#i need to talk to both of them bt i cant because i feel like i will die trying to. heart attack on the spot#as much as i dont want him to i hope he gets a notif for this and asks me sbout it#even though theres no way hed knownim specificslly talking abt him#bc at leas that way it spares me the fucking nightmare kf bringing it up to someone#and its like. objectively not s problem#if i just used my words and talked it out it would be done so fast.but the problem is even though i talk to both of them so much#the thought of talking to them abt this specific thing scares me so bad that#i think if i sent a text about it i would close discord snd not open it for 2 years#sighghhggggghhghgghhhggh ive been rlly good abt not venting on tumblr lately bc i didnt like doing it in the first plsce but#there is literally nowhere else for me to complain about this in a spacethat i am comfortable complaining sbt it in#that does not include one of the affected guys#lycan howls
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u know whats terrifying. thay video of jk that made by his stalkers, that absolutely invading his privacy is being spreaded so freely
#like srsly? ive seen so many versions already#and noone absolutely noone tells to stop spreading it#i dont rlly care about cigs and staff but im what makes me cringe that this people following and secretly filming him#its even worse then paparazzi tbh#jungkook#bts#yulia talks
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what if instead of messaging me in the middle of the night about your stupid fucking girlfriend and your stupid fucking problems with her you actually act like my fucking friend and message me like how you message everyone else in our group
#bye ignore my venting bigger problems what fucking ever#im sick of her ass she only messages us for us to help her with her fucking girlfriend problems like we arent even friends atthis fckn point#and i love her shes so funny whatever but god shes literally the worst because i just want to be friends i dont fucking care ab her goddamn#selfish ass gf thats shes obsessed with. be obsessed tell me about it but cant we be friends ab other stuff too#we used to be her 'favorite friend' cause we shared so many interests and we hung around what fucking ever but fuck that right#get a gf and just use us to help better yalls relationship without even telling her you're sharing her private msgs w us huh yeah sure#what fucking ever im so done with this bitch and i cant even get my contacts out cause i have long nails and im js poking my eye#AND SHE WOULD NEVER BE SORRY if our friendship fell apart she would tell everyone i was jealous of her gf or what ever i literally dont care#she was like an older sister before i dont get why getting a gf would have to change shit like ok good for u but what ab us#what about me its not even fucking fair like is it that hard to keep up w ur friends?? NO its fucking not#taking me so long to write a post bc im still fucking helping her with her stupid dumb selfish idiotic gf omfg#just BREAK UP i literally dont fucking care just leave her if she makes u unhappy its literally online tf is she gonna do to u nothing omfg#why am i the one being punished when shes the one with the stupid dumb gf that hates her and herself i dont fucking care i js want m friend#and i cant tell any of our mutual friends cause she dont do that to them its js me so itd be like im being dramatic#and like shit i guess i am but i dont care atp thats all she ever talks to me ab like ok i get it i helped u but stop jfc#but if i said that we'd never talk again bc what fucking ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cause im just dramatic whatever#if u cant resolve these simple problems of communication on ur own then maybe u shouldnt be in a relationship idk js my thoughts! die#sry the 1 person who knows what xactly i mean is asleep and im so tired of getting late night msgs being like hii can u help me SHUT UP#id love to help if we were actually still fucking friends but we arent so js leave me alone bruh#post#nickpost#will delete in morning my mom keeps telling me to put my phone down bt i need 2 say smfh 2 some1#i hate change i hate slight differences in my normal day to day i hate everything i hate not having smth to rely on i hate change i hate it#sry im alg now im js sick of her ass js leave bruh#nimbhe my moms yelling im tired anyway i need to js isolate myself forever no problems if im on an island alone#living my best life in the shade drinking idk water or whatever and just talking to myself bc who even needs friends right!!!!!!!!#its 11:11 make a wjsh#adding more cz whatever im deleting this ltr anyway#its so clear where i stand with everyone cause its always close but not close enough friendly but not friends and i guess its the same w her#bye im out of tags etc whatever nobody matching my freak ever never comfortable in any friendships
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wait so jjk1 is literally just seven so far??? like there's no other song rn no definite plans for the album no overall artistic view??? or did I misunderstand what he said in suchwita when he said he hadn't really worked on anything else so far???
#cuz dude if the most hyped and anticipated bts solo debut ends up just being some random songs recorded left and right#well there's a joke in there#about the state of this industry this fandom and what they care about (spoiler alert: definitely not music)#i mean i just dont get it#it feels like he doesn't actually want to be making music???#and maybe he doesn't and that's fine he more than deserves to use this hiatus to rest#and figure himself out as a human being#but then why does he do it why would he half ass an album the creative process of which he doesn't seem to care enough to take part in#when his role model is supposed to be namjoon#i just.#at this point im not even mad anymore that he receives the most attention & success while doing much less than all of the other members#i just find it very depressing & discouraging as someone who got into bts bc of what they conveid through their art#like obviously im not in his head but either he doesn't actually care abt music which i still find doubtful#or he's burned out and is doing things bc he has to not bc he wants to#(which kind of feels like it to me. i mean he's definitely not talking abt it the way someone who's actually passionate abt their art would#BTS#jeon jungkook#jjk1
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Actually Tumblr mutuals are the fruit of all existence because the ability to do deep-dives and analysis on interests you share is a love language only online friends can experience
#yes this is a callout post to @mixtapedohs#Olive I have been writing LETTERS and ESSAYS with you since the dawn of time#also shoutout how both of our interests and hyperfixations have changed with each other so even years later we're still poring over texts#and finding That One Thing that makes us go !!!! together#yes we've spent the last hour talking about bts and dissecting the spring day mv and the lyrics of save me/im fine#and the inherent genuineness and authenticity of bangtan#our fangirling? unparalleled
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me when i make a spreadsheet of every single bts song (from group albums) and assign each song a category based on theme/message and then calculate how many songs are in each category and what total percentage of bts songs each category makes up
#my autism levels are off the charts#fr though it was fun i actually did most of the categorizing a couple months ago i just finally got around to Calculating Stuff tonight#(while acknowledging that my categories are subjective and open to interpretation i did my best to reflect the essences of the songs)#anyway according to my calculations the top 3 categories/themes of bts songs are:#reflective/confessional at ~24%; love (romantic) at ~21%; love (general) at ~10%#that last category is for songs where the relationship to the subject is either not directly specified or is platonic#it does include some songs which are often interpreted through a romantic lens#but the lyrics don't directly reference romantic love and they could easily be applied to any type of close relationship#despite these songs commonly being known as romantic i have also seen many people talk about how#the lyrics of those songs reminded them not of a romantic partner but of a close friend or family member or even the love between bts+army#so i wanted a category for songs that acknowledge the intensity/importance of love that's not necessarily romantic#for me this whole thing really just hammered home the fact that categorizing and quantifying non-numerical data is really fucking hard#if anyone is as nerdy as i am and wants to hear more about this i will gladly provide btw im really nice#aeron.txt
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I keep running out of time and changing my sentences in the middle of saying them ajsusjdkdkdk aaggggggg i dont want to do the presentation on monday :(
#fucking up in front of +40 people brought to you by yours truly#im so scared!!!!!! i like my investigation bt i do not want people to ask me questions about my game!!!!#idk girl idk how im gonna make it#also while practising one of my family members decided to joke and ask if i had done the art with ai :) go fuck yourself :)#god this is gonna be such a mess. both the presentation and the game. why did i pursue higher education#haunted.txt#i should have asked a classmate to practice with me but i didnt wanna bother her...#i feel like all i do is bother people lately im having the shittiest time even managing to progress a little with the art for the game#why did i choose a game why did i explain it with a cool concept now im gonna have to make smth worth playing#which it wont because i talk a lot so its just a very short and tedious text game that no ones gonna enjoy aghhhhhh#my breakdowns count as method acting of the game characters lol we are all having a horrible time#also my professors keep not giving me revisions we on week 6 of being completely ignored#please for the love of god at least leave me an emoji saying you read my shit oh my god im going to snap
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Watching a video of an animation student in other country made me realize how fucking deficient my university is, por la gran puta...
#zagreus rambling#like. my degree is a double one so first half you're supposed to learn animation#the other half videogame development#wanna know why yall never see me do ANYTHING related to actual animation?#we didnt learn shit#the key classes for animations were NOTHING#they were either given by someone who DOES NOT work in animation or has a “similar” work#storyboard? given by a guy who doesnt work in animation#just gave us a wikipedia explanation all semester#animation workshop? one of the fucking few classes done by someone who knoes#only showed us pixar shorts and BTS's of said shorts#then wanted us to come up with our own storyboard and animatics#no explanations as HOW DO THEY FUCKING WORK IN THE ACTUAL INDUSTRY#I dont even wanna talk about stop motion#shit was a disaster#and by younger classmates I'm learning they are having it even worse than me#god Im so pissed#THIS IS THE ONLY UNIVERSITY THAT HOLDS THIS FUCKING DEGREE IN THE COUNTRY YOU WOULD EXPECT THEM TO IDK AT LEAST HAVE SOMETHING FOR US??#LIKE CONFERENXES WITH ANIMATORS AND BETTER EDUCATION OF ANIMATION??#si son de aqui de san salvador y alguna vez han ido a uno de esos eventos que hacen en el Ricaldone que los bichos hasta ponen sus cortos#esos majes de seguro recibieron MEJOR educacion que uno en la universidad en 5 años man#me emputa de plano. me emputa todo#ALSO “Digital Animation” WHY THE FUCK WERE WE LEARNING STOPMOTION
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