#and im like oh. yeah. and then i remember the other thing is not even canon
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henneseyhoe · 21 hours ago
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Just One More | 💭
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Lewis Hamilton x BLACK!FEM!Reader
WARNINGS: Mentions Of Sexual Activity, Pregnancy, Dad!Lewis, Humor, Fluff
SUMMARY: Anotha one(a baby! yaaay!)
***A/N DISCLAIMER 💌- this is !!!NOT!!! apart of the official Just One More AU, i just thought it was a silly idea to write the fans reacting if he got you pregnant AGAIN 😭 dw, id never torture yall with five kids <333***
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Y/NUSERNAME
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Liked by essence and 986,862 others
Back from 🇺🇸…with souvenirs🩷 lewishamilton
USER1 WHAT??? OMG
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER2 again????
USER3 ARE YOU NOT TIRED???
USER4 I CALLED IT 😭😭😭
f1 Was itching for this announcement! See them in about 17 years maybe? 🫣🤭🍼
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER5 planning for a baby that isn’t here yet ain’t crazy??? 😭
USER6 F1 having a contract ready for a fetus was not on my 2025 bingo card?
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER7 (user6) how come? they did it for a few drivers racing now 😅😂
USER8 oh they get doooown 😭
USER9 LEWIS PLEASE GET OFF OF HER MY GOD
USER10 SERIOUSLY LIKE I PROMISE SHES NOT GOING NO WHERE LET HER GO 😭
USER11 this is why she takes so long to restock the website. too busy HUNCHING 😒
ynusername hunching?????? 😭😭😭
USER12 last time she was pregnant we didn’t get that tour…🥲
USER13 mind you this is the LAST time you sabotages us 😐🫵🏽 (lewishamilton)
USER14 Please tell me this is for a late halloween costume
ynusername yeah, i’m going as me when im pregnant 🙂
USER14 (ynusername) Y/N do not play with us right now..
lewishamilton legacy 💪🏾🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒💜💛
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER15 YOU ALREADY HAD A LEGACY. FOUR OF THEM. YOU ARE SO INCONSIDERATE!!!
USER16 this is the greed they talk about in the bible, Lewis…
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER17 Omggg another little Hamilton 🥹
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
YBFF ANSWER THE PHONE Y/N???? 😭
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
YBSF bye i should have known when you didn’t wanna hang 😪😫💛
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER18 No you should have known when she was out here dressing like big pun in them 7x ass clothes
ynusername (user18) Yooo 😭😭😭
USER19 You guys just finding out, meanwhile me and my husband saw her at the superbowl yesterday night. She even waved😅
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
ynusername Thanks for keeping a secret! 😘💚🦅
USER20 and you didn’t snitch??? better than me
USER21 (user20) It wasn’t my place 🤷🏻‍♂️
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
USER22 Lewis and Giannis going baby for baby this year
USER23 Lewis is winning I fear!
essence Mama Y/N takes no breaks! And neither does Lewis we see 👀🤭
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
ynusername Essence…🥴🤭
USER24 HOW GREEEEEDY 😭
USER25 Soooo is there going to be a restock for the merch or does this stop it—
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
ynusername catch the restock Tuesday! Pregnancy only stops one thing and that’s me from seeing my feet 😭🩷
gq We knew first 😜
❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
ynusername 🤭
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“Your fans are plotting on ripping my head off, do you see what they’re saying on twitter?!”
Lewis exclaimed and turned his phone to you, scrolling down his new notifications. You shift under the beds sheets to look at the screen, squinting slightly to read. The replies were filled with shock, as you expected, and some jokes here and there, but mostly shock. You cackle, your plump belly bouncing with every laugh.
“I can’t do anything about that! I told you if you got me pregnant again, I’d hurt you, but it looks like they’re wanting to do my dirty work”
You took the phone from his hands and cuddled up to his side as he covers the both of you with the beds duvet.
He scoffs. “Don’t act like you didn’t ask for it” Tucking his head beneath yours, he bites your neck, making you tuck your chin with a giggle.
“Shut up! That was in the moment…plus, you asked me to say it”
He hums and shakes his head, remembering the night you two conceived completely different than you.
“Nah. I don’t remember asking you to say you wanted another one of my kids. Actually, I remember what you said word for word if you want me to recite it” He mischievously clears his throat, but your hand had already made it’s way over his mouth to shut him up before he even started.
“If you say anything and my babies hear, it’s gonna be me and you” You threatened, Lewis’s eyes crinkling at the sides as he smiles widely underneath your hand.
Suddenly you felt your palm being wet, your instinct being to move. “EW! YOU LICKED ME!”
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💌—another reminder that this is NOT APART OF THE ACTUAL AU!! it’s just something cute i wanted to write as a scenario.
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amywritesthings · 3 hours ago
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I have to put all of these tags in a read more because when I'm telling you I have read them over and over to the point where I have teared up alsdfjkalsjdf peach you absolutely spoiled me with these reactions, you really did. This is every author's dream to see: a wall of text with many capslocks and screeching. If I was self conscious about my smut, then I am certainly no longer thanks to you!!!!
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#the second and I mean the SECOND I saw ‘resolved sexual tension’ I started giggling like I fucking goblin #plus ‘nipple play’ Amy you’re trying to kill me #I’m on my period and you’re trying to kill me #idk starting with cradling her head when that’s the thing she hit and how he lost her?? I’m fine. I’m fine. #(I’m sobbing loudly) #instinctually you jump knowing he’ll catch you’ oh you’re out for blood ok #‘fighting or fucking. the odds are fifty fifty’ when I tell you I snorted #Hange’s got a bet pool going I know it #HIM CUTTING OFF HER APOLOGY I AM EATING THIS UP SO HARD AMY #the two of you know the language of violence so well but you know each other better is actually an insane line #Amy you always blow me away but THIS?? #it’s so tender and sweet and you can just feel the sense of *finally* #like yeah there are pieces still missing but they’re falling back into place and that’s what matters #YEAH JAMES CLIMB THAT MAN LIKE THE TREES YOU CRASHED THROUGH #‘do you think the others —‘ ‘I don’t care’ might be the hottest exchange I’ve ever read #god you catch his personality so beautifully. it’s such a treat to read your Levi #even if dirt was a sin apparently you were not. <- Amy I’m going to kill you /aff #tit lover Levi I love this song #HIM HOLDING BACK IM GONNA SOBB #he will never forgive himself for what happened I know it but he won’t let that keep him from what he wants and I love that so much #PINNING HER DOWN BY HEE HIPS WHILE SHE COMES I SWEAR I DROOLED #“our rule’ oh I would’ve cursed his ass out over that fucking three rule thing. now is not the time Levi!! #still remembering to use protection!! my conscious babies!! #‘I never stopped loving you’ hey what if I threw myself off a cliff?? dramatically #‘TAKE WHATEVER YOU WANT FROM ME. IT’S ALWAYS BEEN YOURS’ #AMY WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO JUST WRITE BANGER AFTER BANGER #‘I’ll cum so fast’ yeah that’s the goal stupid. #oh he’s a babbler. #’let go. I’ll catch you’ AMY FUCK OFFFFF /aff #you’re killing me with this. the symbolism of falling as something good compared to last chapter and the start of the story
silver underground. | chapter 24
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( Read on AO3 )
Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin) Word Count: 6.3k Summary: day 163 - continued.
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI - explicit smut, resolved sexual tension, oral (f!receiving), nipple play, body worship, fingering, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, protected piv sex, angst, mentions of death, sensuality Credits: dividers by @saradika-graphics
Previous Chapter. / Next Chapter. | Masterlist.
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I feel... you.
The answer to your question you’ve been asking the moment you opened your eyes.
The clarity you’ve sought ever since you locked eyes with the captain of the Scouts.
I remember you.
Levi kisses you like he knows you, and the rest of the world ceases to exist.
His sturdy hands flutter in a flurry, touching every part of you like he wishes he could have it all.
Chilled palms cup your face, cradling your head as if it's the most precious thing they've ever touched, before sliding down your neck; to the slope of your shoulder, dipping down your sides — pulling you closer, closer, until you’re airborne.
You’re not afraid of falling.
Not with him.
Instinctually you jump, knowing he’ll catch you. 
Your thighs clench around his waist as one strong arm supports your weight, unwilling to compromise the position of his other hand. It remains on your cheek, cupping your face to hold your kisses steady.
As the man stumbles forward, you hear the abrupt slam of the wooden chair go flying across the room, skidding to its side on the floor. 
It’s loud.
(Surely someone downstairs will hear.)
Hange, Moblit, Erwin — in a best-case scenario, those who stayed behind will be the only privy to the commotion.
However, if the entire squad has returned from the forest...
Well, there's no mistaking the shuffles and slams coming from Captain Levi's room.
Fighting or fucking; the odds are fifty-fifty.
He doesn't seem to care.
Honestly?
Neither do you.
(Too much time wasted on open secrets.)
With immense control and strength, he slowly lowers you both to the bed. The bed frame creaks in its age under the weight, but the mattress feels soft compared to the forest floor you crashed into mere hours ago.
Your back touches the ivory sheets, engulfing you in the scent of him. Something uniquely Levi; crisp and impossibly clean with a musk that’s making your mouth water. 
You’ve smelled it in passing the few times he’s passed you at headquarters — always at arm’s length, no matter how close you try to get — but now it’s bound to stick to your body, your clothes —
The way it used to in the Underground. 
The way it used to in this very bed.
His kisses are messy yet precise, focused on the feel of your mouth against his. When you let out a shaken breath and whimper, overwhelmed by his reinvigorated passion, Levi outright groans. 
The same arm once holding you up snakes around from under your back to meet its twin cradling your face, keeping you in place.
(As if you’d ever wish to leave.)
“I’m sorry,” you whisper between kisses.
“Don’t,” he replies just as softly, tugging at your lower lip with his teeth. “Not now.”
“But—”
“I don’t want your damn apologies,” he sighs, traveling south to pepper your jawline with short, chaste kisses. “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”
When he senses your hesitance, he pumps the brakes on his kisses and raises his chin to look you in the eye. The storm in his eyes has darkened to a damn near black.
His button-down hangs off of his bony frame, giving you a view of the expanse of skin beneath.
“Nothing,” he repeats.
Like he knows you want to fight.
(The two of you know the language of violence so well, but you know one another better.)
The protests, the pleas, the endless stream of begging dies on your tongue the second his thumb grazes your lower lip with reverence.
Emotion flickers across his face, gone as fast as it came, before he dives back in for another kiss — slower this time, the push and pull deliberate with reassurance.
This.
This is what your lips should be doing, not apologizing.
The message is received loud and clear: you tilt your chin to meet him in every kiss, hands blindly raising to run through the soft strands of his black hair. He exhales through his nose, the hot breath tickling your skin.
For the longest time, it’s all you do.
Kiss.
One for every day spent apart.
One for every fight you’ve ever had.
One for every memory you’ve yet to recall.
The puzzle has a frame, yet there are still missing pieces, destroyed edges, that may never return. Maybe he’ll never make peace with it, but knowing you were a stone’s throw away from death surrenders that grief into confetti.
There will be new memories to make.
(As the keeper of your heart, you trust his recollection of the details you can no longer recount.)
This life won’t be perfect, it never has been from the beginning, but so long as you have this — have Levi — then nothing else matters.
“I can hear you thinking.”
The first part of that statement is muffled by a kiss, but he pulls away to check in during this languid, yearning make out session.
Levi squints down at you, lips pink from exertion.
“I’m not,” you lie.
His eyes narrow further. 
“Fine. I am.”
“About?”
“About how badly I want you.”
The blatant honesty dissolves that narrowness in seconds.
“About... how you—”
With the strength harnessed by adrenaline, you push on Levi’s chest, hard, until he’s flat on his back.
The bed creaks again when you crawl on top of him, straddling his hips while your hands plant themselves on the soft flesh of his wrists.
Down; you push down, pinning him underneath.
Levi doesn’t tense. He simply stares above, allowing you to do this.
“Want you,” you clarify, “yes.”
His throat bobs, but his expression stays cool. 
“Are you sure?”
“Do I look like I’m hesitating, Captain Levi?” you challenge, leaning down to hover over his face.
His hands leisurely flex under your hold, as if to relax them from their clenched state. 
For a moment, doubt creeps in.
Even if he’s confessed, there is still so much time unspoken for; so much to talk about, so much that you have missed.
Maybe it’s too much.
The grip on his wrists falters. “Unless if you don’t want—”
With inhuman strength, he uses the light hold you have on his wrists to push up, setting you off balance.
As you waver he quickly finds the upper hand, switching your positions once more so he can pin your wrists to the mattress beneath.
“Don’t even try to finish that sentence.”
To make his point, he drops his head to your neck and plants open-mouthed kisses against the column of your throat. You can’t help but make a strained noise of desire, eyes fluttering shut from ecstasy.
From this vantage point, you feel it — the sheer tension in his hold on your wrists, how desperately he resists clenching down, how gentle he aims to be when he glides both of your wrists from the sides of your face to over the crown of your head.
Levi doesn’t tremble, not like you. He remains as calculated as ever.
His lazy, methodical kisses trail up your neck to your jaw to your mouth. Both of his hands work to carefully connect your wrist in an x-formation. Once satisfied by your compliance, he slides one of his hands over both to latch on, pushing them down — yet still giving you plenty of room to escape if something doesn’t feel right.
(For the first time in over six months, everything feels perfectly in place.)
Panting against his mouth to catch your breath, a floating thought comes to mind once again.
So you speak. “Do you think the others—”
“I don’t care,” he interrupts, capturing your lips in a searing kiss. You follow his lead, tilting your chin up to meet him. “I do not fucking care right now, James.”
His candidness earns him a gentle giggle, and you feel the slightest shift against your lips:
A smile of his own.
You tap his hip cascaded by the disheveled fabric of his white button-down with your knee.
“Then take this off.”
The kisses cease at your request — no, demand — and Levi pulls away enough to stare down into yours.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Those beautiful gray eyes, stormy with droplets of blue — you realize the deep hurt in your belly is a pang of loss.
You say it before you can regret holding it back.
"I missed you."
His expression smooths with how earnest you sound beneath him, before clearing his throat.
“Which part?” he asks, voice slightly strained from the efforts of holding back.
You blink twice. "Which part?"
"Of me, yeah."
Searching his face, you decide to play along.
“Are you going to get mad if I say all of you?”
His eyes narrow. “Lazy.”
The flatness of his joke earns a genuine belly laugh from you. 
Levi lets go of your wrists to sit up, nudging your legs apart so he can wriggle out of the way. You easily comply, careful to leave your boots hanging off of the bed when you widen your thighs.
Stepping away from the bed, he bends over first to remove both of your boots, then his own.
Any other time he’d have a conniption over the dirt, the grime, that you’ve brought into this bed.
(If there was one thing to remember about your past, it was that people from the Underground City could still be just as clean as anyone else. So much time spent cleaning the endless grit from under your nails; an impossible feat.)
Even if dirt was a sin, apparently you were not.
He doesn’t even blink at the specs that may very well still be in your hair.
Instead he’s focused on watching your face as he unfastens the harness at his sternum, shrugging out of his own leather straps. Tossed carelessly to the floor, he rips off his dirtied cravat and ODM gear skirt next.
Pressing a knee into the mattress, he rejoins you on the bed to reach for your chest.
He hesitates, throat bobbing with fleeting uncertainty before he begins to slip the leather through its loop.
“Sit up for me.”
You acquiesce, sore muscles protesting the movement as you prop yourself up on your elbows.
He’s softer with his movements when it comes to your uniform, pulling it apart piece by piece, as if afraid one false move will ruin this dream.
It’s not a dream, you want to tell him. I’m right here. I’ve always been right here. I won’t be going anywhere ever again.
You don’t.
Can’t, not when you’re so mesmerized by the way he pauses at the first button of your shirt.
For a short moment he meets your gaze, studying it, before nodding once.
One by one, deft fingers unbutton your shirt until it’s hanging from your frame, revealing a chest band. All of the air rushes from his lungs in one swift woosh, until you realize—
The scars.
Shit.
The dreamy spell is broken, and soon you find yourself scrambling for something that will quell any negative emotion bubbling in his belly at the sheer sight of your body.
A part of you wants to cover up, act coy and switch roles —
But clever Levi, forever two steps ahead, dives right in to kiss the one of the many healing scars littering your body after the fall — the jagged line just above your left breast — with such fierce devotion that the gesture nearly knocks the damn wind of your lungs.
“Beautiful.”
The murmur is tattooed into your skin, invisible to the wandering eye.
“So—”
He unsnaps the bind.
“—fucking—”
Like a feral animal, his hand tugs once, twice, until it gives and unravels.
“—beautiful.”
Levi forgets himself when his eyes meet your breasts, and you see the way his pupils damn near dilate at the sight.
His lips part, slick from the way he licks between them, before he exhales one single curse like it's a prayer.
“Fuck.”
You stay perfectly still on your elbows, perched on an incline in his bed.
At a loss for words as he stares at your torso like it’s a work of art, your heart hammers in your chest as you telepathically plead with him to simply do whatever he wishes.
Anything he desires, so long as he moves.
Your voice dissolves to a whimper.
“Levi—”
“Can I?”
“Please.”
His own voice crackles like a spark readying a flame. You want to feel him, separated by the absence of muscle memory; to have his hands, his lips, scorched on your skin forevermore.
Levi gives into temptation and kisses south, his nose tracing in a straight line until both hands hold your breasts.
Hot sighs heavily flutter across your skin before those very lips kiss the rising bud they’d been seeking, causing your back to arch clear off of the bed. You whine, trying desperately to stay quiet.
Levi’s too busy worshipping the nipple in his mouth to chastise you for the sound.
His tongue swirls to harden it faster while his other hand massages the other breast, his calloused thumb rolling in the same direction.
Your nails dig into the sheets, anchoring your hands from clawing up his back.
“Levi.”
He hums around your nipple as his answer, its tone dismissive.
When you’re brave enough to open your eyes, you see that his eyes are completely closed — softened in an otherworldly ecstasy at the sheer feel of your body against his.
The sight shoots a dizzying amount of arousal to your belly.
When he switches it up and sucks, those eyes lazily open to stare up at you: a challenge to let him stay like this, to never leave.
He wouldn’t have to ask twice.
If this was your entire night, with Levi’s mouth on your chest while he lives in the memories of you old and new, then you’re inclined to say that there are worse ways to spend your time.
(No, you’re happy to say like this forever.)
Except a chill passes over your pampered breast as Levi kisses across it, abandoning your nipple to trail to the other side — 
Fuck.
“You’re going to kill me,” you rasp, too worked up to care if you sound wrecked.
“Won’t,” is all he replies as he dives back in, worshipping your body.
“Will,” you grit, trying your damnedest not to cry out from just how good it feels.
With one final kiss to your nipple, Levi detaches with mercy to shrug the pesky white button-down off of his shoulders.
The fabric joins the mounting pile of clothes on the floor, but his hands hesitate when they touch his belt.
His eyes notably flicker to your belt — a pause.
Deciding.
If it’s too soon—
If it’s too much —
No, you want to cry out. It’s not enough.
The words die on your tongue, possessed by the ghost that’s plagued your mind for months.
Instead you take action: sitting up on the bed, overly eager fingers tremble as they begin to unbuckle his belt, working at the leather straps crisscrossing his thighs and calves. 
“James.”
His voice is dying on his tongue; a singular syllable of surprise.
“Let me.”
You notice the way his abdomen tenses at your words as you tug the first belt from its loops.
“Are you s—”
“I said,” you slowly repeat, moving closer to kiss the trail of dark hair peppering just under his belly button. Levi exhales like he’s been punched. “Let. Me.”
Punctuating each word to show your seriousness, your eyes meet as he stares below.
Inch by inch, you press slow, meaningful kisses in his skin — first to the left, curving towards his hip. 
Your hands push down the trousers of his uniform pants, using the strength to drag the leather straps wrapping around his legs to fall with them.
Levi stands before you in merely white briefs, and there’s no hiding the immense arousal straining against the thin fabric.
The sight causes your breath to simply evaporate from your lungs, unable to stop staring.
From your peripheral you see the hand at his side flex then snatch into a fist to combat the desire to touch you.
He must feel guilt.
He must be so terrified that this moment will simply evaporate like the rest of your memories.
That you may have woken up, yes, but you can still fall back asleep.
You refuse.
“You can touch me,” you murmur into his skin, and Levi’s throat bobs. 
When he doesn’t move, you take the first at his side and systematically uncurl every finger.
He lets you.
Slowly, calculated, you raise his hand until it’s running over the crown of your head. His nostrils flare as he takes control, abandoning the guide of your hand to cup the side of your face.
A gentle thumb smears across your lower lip in reverence.
“I won’t break,” you tell him, knowing he’ll protest. Your voice drops to a hush. “I won’t.”
“I know,” is all he can reply — then your back hits the bed again, and he drops to his knees at the edge of the bed.
Levi disappears from your immediate line of sight, but you feel pressure on your hips: inch by inch, he’s undone the belt and buttons and yanked your uniform down your thighs, your knees, until they’re hanging at your ankles.
Oh.
One by one, he slips your feet from the pants and uses your ankles to widen your knees, bearing you to him at eye-level in just your white cotton underwear.
“Shit.” 
A feeble gasp escapes when his lips start at your left foot. 
You can’t see him, only feel him — he presses a tender kiss to your ankle then another just above it, creating a careful line up to your calf. His fingers gingerly curl around it to keep you steady as he ascends with his lips touching every single inch he can.
When he reaches your knee, you see it: the darkness in his gaze, how stormy his eyes have become, while making direct contact with you.
“Levi,” you moan, refusing to look away as he makes a point to stare at you while he nudges your left thigh further out to keep kissing it.
Stay awake.
Don’t forget this.
Don’t ever forget this again.
“Can I?” he asks, and you nearly miss the question in your intoxicated, aroused state.
You know.
You know exactly what he’s asking to do.
There’s no chance in hell you’d ever say no.
Wordlessly you nod, but Levi’s tongue darts out to taste the skin of your inner thigh. “Say it.”
(Fuck, when did he get so demanding?)
“Yes,” you exhale. “Yes, I want this. Want you.”
He doesn’t answer with words — a mere wanting growl takes their place.
Raven-black hair tickles your bare skin as he shifts, and strong arms drop to your rope under your knees.
With one swift tug, he drags you directly against his face, and the world becomes a myriad of brilliant colors.
Even if it’s a mere kiss to the cloth of your dampened underwear, you whine from the sheer desire flooding through your veins.
Maybe in another life, you would have teased him for his eagerness.
Maybe before the fall, you would have made him work for it, asked him to crawl to you, to beg.
Not this time.
You don’t have time to be coy, not when it’s been so long.
The tip of his tongue sensually drags up the center of your underwear, the slowness obscene. Your head slams back into the mattress with a soundless cry. 
The hot puffs of his breath tickle your inner thighs as he continues to swirl his tongue against the final barrier between you and his mouth.
“Please,” you beg, throwing all dignity to the wind.
He doesn’t seem to hear you.
Levi’s hands grip your hips firmly, keeping you in place as he continues to gather the taste of you on your panties.
When you have the courage to watch him again, you see that his eyes are closed.
Like he’s found some kind of paradise right here.
With you.
“Levi,” you whimper louder, voice terribly shattered, “Levi, Levi, please—”
His moans against your clothed clit damn near scrambles your brain.
Finally ending your torture, he pulls away to tug your soaked underwear down your thighs, your knees, until they drop to the floor of their own volition.
“Been dreaming of this,” he finally states, his voice several octaves lower and cracked. “The goddamn taste of you—”
He cuts himself off when he runs his thumbs down your folds, parting them with his thumbs.
If you weren’t so eager, then maybe you’d be embarrassed by how wet you were.
Dripping, really, from the way he worshipped your chest only minutes ago.
You almost scream when he dives in and kisses your clit, before his tongue languidly glides against it. By some miracle, you don’t.
His thumbs leave you in favor of holding open your legs for him as he feasts, refusing to allow them to close from the shock of the forgotten sensation.
With one hand grabbing the pillow above your head while the other threads through his hair, you’re unable to take your eyes away from how thoroughly he eats you out.
“Oh fuck,” you whisper, and the vibrations of his groans of agreeance damn near take you out.
The captain’s tongue explores every atom of you as if it has navigated this journey more times than he can count; as if he knows you better than you know yourself.
Because a part of you can remember —
The things you like.
The things you don’t like.
The hazy desires that plague heated dreams at night.
Yet Levi reaffirms them, teaches your body language right back to you, as his eyes lift from his task to yours to watch you watching him devour you whole.
Mesmerized, you stare back.
His lips close around your clit and suck as if to challenge you to look away, but all you can do is tense your abdomen and moan, louder this time, while your eyes flutter.
Stay open.
Don’t ever forget.
Lips parted with shaken breath, you witness this man mercilessly pleasures you.
Stares, so he knows that you’re still taken by him.
Worships, so he can remember what it’s like to finally have you in his bed after so many months apart.
It won’t take long to fall clear over the edge.
Not at this rate.
But you don’t want it to be over.
“Wait,” you whisper, “wait, I’m almost — I want you in—”
The second syllable of that word is lost in a sharp cry to the ceiling when he abandons solely sucking on your clit to focus instead on flickering side to side, rapidly, ensuring you’ll come no matter how badly you want to fall into bliss alongside him.
There’s no chance you can stave it off.
Your climax, a damn near year in the making, approaches like a bursting star.
“Levi—” you breathe, higher pitched than usual. “Levi, Levi, Le—”
You can’t finish the next syllable before you're surging off of the mattress, and he shoves you down against it by the hips so you don’t hurt yourself.
The world morphs and shapes into brilliant bright colors in the back of your skull as you come, and you do your damnedest not to shout.
As soon as your moan reaches its peak, your hand manages to smack against your mouth, muffling the strained screech.
His tongue slows down, instead focused on leisurely catching your essence with his mouth.
Greedily collecting every last drop.
So he doesn’t have to dream anymore, you realize.
So he never goes without again.
Panting heavily, your chest rises and falls rapidly as you try to remember which way is up.
“Holy shit.”
That doesn’t even begin to describe how otherworldly you feel at this moment.
“Levi…”
When you finally open your eyes, you see him resting his cheek against the inside of your thigh, nose and mouth glistening with the essence of you.
You’re not sure who is more satisfied.
“You okay?” he asks, softly this time.
Hardly a whisper.
You nod wordlessly, but hold your hand out for him. “Please?”
“Please what?”
“Let me have you.”
A storm flashes across his expression as he stands from the floor, his knee coming to rest on the edge of the mattress.
You can tell he isn’t putting his whole weight on it, avoiding the creaking of the bed frame as he contemplates.
“Not yet,” he murmurs, his fingertips running up and down your thigh absently.
“Why?”
“Because it’s been a while.”
The wandering fingers travel up, toying with the mess between your legs. Your hips jerk from oversensitivity, and a ghost of a smug smile passes across his lips.
“And I’m not rushing this.”
“Why?” you repeat, this time in a whine.
“Like I said—”
He begins, testing the give of your entrance as his middle finger pushes its tip into you.
You sharply gasp, forcing him to instantly stop. Those gray eyes flicker to your face.
“—it’s been a while.”
“I don’t care,” you state. “I can take it.”
“Well I do, so deal with it.”
There.
That commanding tone reserved for his position as captain pokes through, and it shoots straight to your lower belly.
Rocking your hips to try and force more of his finger into you, you shake your head wildly.
“You do realize that the more —”
His fingertip eases out, causing you to cry out in frustration. “Shh.”
There’s only so much sanity left in your body to plead your case.
“It — ah — the more time we spend away from the others downstairs—”
“As much as I like hearing you talk,” he reassures, voice dropping to a husk of its former self, “I really don’t want to discuss the whereabouts of anyone else when I could have my fingers inside you instead.”
Then that same finger suddenly pushes.
One knuckle.
Two.
Your head drops back when he buries his middle finger into you, unapologetic.
His free palm drops to the side of your head as he hovers over you, easing you to relax as he pushes one finger in and out.
The fringe of his black hair falls over his eyes, his face flushed with inexplicable lust.
“Do you remember our rule?”
Do you really expect me to think straight now? is what you want to say.
Instead you keep your eyes on him as he fucks you on one finger, too tight yet not nearly enough. You maintain eye contact, scrambling for an answer.
“With what?”
When his finger curls, you have to bite your tongue not to shriek.
“C’mon, James,” he purrs, the heel of his palm rubbing against your clit, “what’s my rule for you?”
Rules.
Rules, rules, rules—
Then it clicks, the puzzle piece unearthed deep from your psyche.
“Three,” you weakly whimper, realizing just what’s about to happen.
When we had our own place—
He nudges his index finger beside his middle finger, opening you up more.
You widen your legs with little shame, sinking into the sheets as this man thoroughly takes you apart in his captain’s bed.
—I always said I’d give you three.
“Think you can give me it?” he asks with feigned confidence.
You know what he’s really asking:
Is this too much?
Am I moving too fast?
Would this be taking advantage too soon?
The opposite; what he’s doing isn’t enough, because you know what you want.
You need to give him what he wants first before you reach your goal.
Belatedly, you nod emphatically.
“Good,” is all he replies in that baritone voice of his, before dropping down to kiss you when he curls his fingers again, relentlessly fucking you.
The kiss is maddening. Searing. Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you try to keep up with the messy press of lips, all too eager to indulge in what it means to feel alive.
This.
This is what home feels like.
You never had to build it with nails and wood and insulation.
It was always in the person hovering above you, working you open with a sneaky third finger that causes a pathetic strangled moan to die on your lips the second his tongue dips into your mouth.
Relentless.
You’re so far gone that you don’t even realize you’ve already come a second time.
It’s Levi who pulls back, looking down at his hand as he keeps curling his fingers into you.
“Shit, already? Can feel you getting tighter– Fuck, James.”
Shaking from the less intense but no less amazing orgasm, you come silently on his hand as you melt into the sheets.
Stars blur your vision like the first snow of a winter.
Weightless.
Watching Levi pull his fingers out of you to immediately put them into his mouth, licking each digit clean, is an out of body experience.
Nothing to waste, nothing to lose — he relishes in the taste lingering on his tongue before you leisurely nudge him with your knee.
He’s still wearing his underwear, but his cock is practically ready to burst through the fabric. His hardness looks painful, the flush of his skin prominent against the ivory cotton.
“...do we still have condoms?”
Your voice is faint, an exhale at best.
His eyes widen briefly before his jaw clenches, and his hair flutters as he nods.
“Yeah. They… should be expiring in about two months.”
“But not right now.”
Levi considers your inquiry, searching your face. “Not right now, no.”
A moment of content silence passes, his eyes glued to yours.
You want to reassure him that you’re more than ready, that it’s been too fucking long since you’ve had him, that you need this more than anything you’ve ever needed in your life.
You can’t.
All you can do is beg, as you have this whole day.
“Please?”
His head drops in defeat, shoulders slumping.
All of the air leaves his lungs as he leaves your side to rummage in the nightstand by his bed, and you can see it clear as day on the hand that is still pressed to the mattress:
He’s trembling.
Sitting up on your elbow, you reach to gently place your palm over it. His attention whips back to you, first staring at your joined hands before looking back at you.
“Are you sure?” the captain asks, looking for complete and utter consent.
You open your mouth to respond, but Levi curls his fist over the condom foil and sits up taller.
His hand lifts the two of your hands together, switching their positions so your palm ends up on his cheek.
In a tender moment, his lips press a chaste kiss to its center.
“We can wait if it’s too much.”
You shake your head wildly. “It’s not too much.”
“You only just—”
“Levi.”
Exasperated, you crawl around him to slowly hike your bare leg over his hip.
Hovering over his lap, his eyes round when you snap the waistband of his briefs between pinched fingers. Instinctively his hand reaches to steady your bare hip.
“I know you have every good reason to worry that I could change my mind. That I could forget.”
He flinches, if only for a fraction of a second.
“But I never left you. I never stopped wanting to be near you. I never…”
Trailing off, you realize.
The words are right there on your tongue.
The image flashes through your mind: two kids just barely making sense of this cruel world, tangled together, when his whispered words tickled the shell of your ear.
Words that would change your life forever.
“I never stopped loving you.”
With a single blink, the lines on Levi’s weary face soften.
The captain’s throat bobs, swallowing the emotions that come with your confession. 
He speaks with a conviction unlike anything you’ve ever heard.
“...I never stopped loving you, too.”
Joy blossoms in the center of your chest as you lean in, capturing his lips in a kiss that seals the promise of forever. He kisses back just as eagerly, his hands leaving your body to push his underwear hastily down his hips. 
You hear the tear of a wrapper foil, feel the shuffling of his hands between your bodies, before lining up the tip of himself against your entrance.
You both stop.
Testing the give with a gentle nudge, you both let out a gut-punch exhale.
“Want you to set the pace,” he states against your lips, trying his damnedest to keep his voice from shaking. “Take whatever you want from me. It’s always been yours.”
Yours.
Nose to nose, you allow him to hold his hard and eager cock steady as you wrap your hand around the back of his neck for an anchor.
Levi lets out a shaken breath when you begin to sink, face flushed with sweat and arousal.
No going back.
(You never want to leave again.)
Inch by inch, you ease yourself onto Levi’s cock. Your eyelids flutter from the sheer ecstasy of finally, finally, having him inside you again.
The captain seated beneath you is oh, so focused, nostrils flared as he bites back a heavy groan.
Although it takes baby steps to get there — you rock your hips and fuck the tip of him, your body slowly relaxing enough to take up more of him — you eventually end up seated with your legs wrapped around his waist.
Levi instinctively curls a strong arm around your waist to keep you in place, looking utterly wrecked as he fully submits to your will. His brows are screwed tightly together, eyes struggling to stay open — to watch.
So you watch him, too.
When you lift yourself off of his cock and drag back down to the hilt, you both groan in harmony.
You can’t help it.
A smile bursts on your lips, stretched wide.
This.
This is where you’ve longed to be.
You roll your hips and ride your captain with reverence.
The room reverberates with the sound of skin against skin, your moans and his grunts, the squeak of a well-worn mattress on an ancient wooden frame.
To hell with subtly.
You don’t care who hears downstairs.
Once he has his own emotions under control, Levi memorizes your pace and begins to buck up in a thrust from below.
You gasp, and you see it: he smirks, his own confidence gaining on him.
“That’s my girl,” he groans, his words as finite as ash. “Fuck, there she is.”
The praise has your blood singing, burning, as you bounce on his cock with an urgency to bring him to his long-awaited climax — and your third. 
“I love you,” you tell him, earning a bitten-off grunt for him.
“Fuck, don’t,” he begs as he matches your pace, bringing himself deeper. “I’ll cum so fast.”
“Maybe I want that,” you tease.
“James,” he warns, pinching your nipple as punishment.
You can’t help but cry out, head dropping back. Levi takes the golden opportunity to lean in, kissing the column of your neck to mask his own needy moans.
The fingers once rolling your nipple as you ride him glide down your belly until they catch your clit, causing you to collapse into his chest. You whimper, and you can hear the utter filth against your ear as Levi picks up the pace.
“Love you.” You clench around him, causing him to hiss. “Shit, I love you so goddamn much. Feel so fucking good.”
“Levi—”
“I got you,” he promises, holding you up as he pounds into you from below. “Won’t let you fall. Gonna make me cum so hard, s’like you were made for me — fuck…”
He loses his train of thought as his fingers rub your clit in furious circles, desperate to get you to the same edge where he hovers.
Over and over you moan out his name, unable to even think straight as pleasure succumbs and fills every vein in your body.
From the way his rhythm is faltering, you know:
He’s close.
You’re not very far behind.
“I love you,” you tell him one more time under your breath, unable to say anything else beyond that and broken variations of his name.
His thrusts become more urgent as he answers between clenched teeth.
“I love you, too.”
“Let go.” 
You wrap your arms around his body to hold him close. 
“I’ll catch you, just let go.”
For what it’s worth, he holds on for a few seconds more. 
He gives you the performance of a lifetime as he thrusts up into you, running after his orgasm with a desperation reserved for you and you alone.
Then you feel it.
Levi grabs the back of your head and slams his lips to yours in one final, devastating kiss before you abruptly come around him.
Your muscles spasm and clamp down around him, milking him for all he’s worth before he’s moaning loudly against your mouth. 
He’s forced to fall off the deep end with you, coming inside you. 
You leisurely ride him through your joined orgasms until his hand comes to your hip, stilling your movements.
Eventually the fingers at your clit still, pressing against it to feel its erratic heart beat.
Forehead to forehead, the two of you stay here, catching your breath—
Refusing to part.
.
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Author's Note:
taylor swift vc: it's been a long time coming...
If you've been around my blog for the last several months, then you know I got hit with the author curse (seasonal depression kicked my ass, my day job issued an RTO mandate, I was sick a few times, I have a surgery in late February) so the creative juices were not there. Apologies (and the biggest thanks!) to all who have been waiting so very patiently. To readers old and new, I am so grateful for your reblogs, comments, and inbox messages.
So I ask, after five long months away from you: how are we doing, Jevi Nation?
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gingergari · 26 days ago
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my beautiful baby gorls
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#gari draws#nintendo#smb#gari’s ocs#oc: mela#oc: pera#mareach fankid#fankid#i was honestly considering quoting three wishes for the caption#they cooked with ‘here we stand in time—past present future span’#but yeah! i just really wanted to draw the gorls™️ again#and also draw them older than like. 7#mela has all of her teeth here so imagine that it’s before that other one#imagine them around like. <1 then 6-7 ish then ~18#if you guys remember i mentioned that while mela is technically first in line for the throne even tho she’s a twin she does not have#much interest in it and believes pera is a better fit#so it manifests as pera becoming heir and mela traveling as a royal ambassador/adventurer#mario and peach worry about her ofc and sometimes mela travels with mario but she does a lot solo#she brings back lots of souvenirs for pera when she can’t come with#(not that pera is a homebody mela just moves very fast for her tastes)#idk when they lose the beady eye thing and i will not show a transition 🔥#oh yeah mela’s hair gets lighter! it’ll get even lighter the older she gets before turning grey#i thought about it turning brown but i thought peach needed a win#she also cuts it short when she gets older and honestly i love the way it looks#im sure they have casual outfits too but sorting out the diff child ones was an ordeal i don’t want to do again so#these will be going on their artfight ref 🔥#oh yeah i’m not sure when they stop being the same height but pera is shorter than mela and it pisses her off so bad#mela beating the older sibling is shorter allegations 🙏🏽#and both are taller than mario :^) im not sure on their heights yet BUT there’s a real difference between them#think at least between mario and luigi
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what-even-is-sleep · 9 months ago
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thinking about Bodkin again bc I mean,,, ALL THE SYMBOLISM OHHHHHGH. i NEED some tumblr film analysis hobbyists to watch this show and tell me all the themes n such
#yes I’m making all these posts in a row#it’s bc I’m obsessed atm#mypost#Bodkin#bodkin netflix#PLEASSEEEEE#WHY DID THE PAPER MACHE HEAD LOOK LIKE GILBERT#CAN WE HAVE AN IN-DEPTH CONVERSATION ABOUT EVERYTHING ABOUT GILBERT BEING FORCED TO SWALLOW/CHOKE ON HIS WORDS (recorder) BUT THAT SOUND—HIS#STORY (HIS pov. however ‘abstract’ and detatched from consequence it may have been) BEING WHAT CATCHES EMMY AND DOVEs ATTENTION TO SAVE HIM#. LIKE#OUGHHHHHWJEHQIHSJSBWJXNAJSNNQJZNWHXJWHXJEBXNDUSBJS#AND THE WOLF IMAGERY PLS SOMEONE TELL ME ABOUT THAT#IS THERE MORE THAN THE SURFACE? what do I not understand? as im writing this out am thinking: ok its cause dove is a lone wolf#WAITTTT WAIT OMFG AND when she remembers that her mom told her to howl when she was lost… bc wolves actually have family and I’m p sure the#lone wolf thing is a myth… after she realizes that she’s not alone and she can choose to interact#GOD GRAHHHHH IM GOING CRAZY OVER THIS SHOW#other things I’m thinking abt (will maybe make a post abt?)#OUGH YEAH OK dove symbolism: wolf/lone wolf. sunglasses/shielding herself (OUGH AND SHE PICKS UP THAT XTRA LAYER OF DEFENCE WHEN SHE COMES#BACK TO HOMELAND/familiar space… bc she’s vulnerable to her past here…. hrahhh#. also LMFAO when she calls the sheriff a piggy#hrmmmmm aughhh I want to dissect Gilbert and Seamus’s friendship oughhh#ok wait even more on Dove: I want to dig into when she calls Emmy Emmy vs Sizargd (will have to look up the spelling whoops) —was it always#blatant manipulation? how much of it is a reflection of what she is? hrmmmm there’s so much there I think#another Q: why did Emmy call the tech guy Shitpants again at the end? ik there were the stakes I just wanna dig into her character more. why#would she say the shitpants thing instead of manipulating him in other ways? (not saying her was was unreasonable at all lol-j wanna dig#into her character.#OH prob something abt the whole ‘her needing to release her anger’ thing? idk ahh I want to analyze her more
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moeblob · 1 year ago
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Demyx (my beloved)
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infiniteseriesofhalfways · 3 months ago
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sitting in the parking lot thinking i might vom
#it's a chain place and ive been on the other side of places like this#(i wasnt an interviewer but i was friends with them)#and there at least people would show up late + in sweats for the interview and they'd get it!#they would show up with 'oh yeah interview today almost forgot' and they'd get it!#meanwhile im having a breakdown trying to do everything right and perfect#making sure i look nice but not too nice bc again its a chain fast food place and i cant try Too Hard#also these pants dont have belt loops and they tend to shift#AND my right hand is swollen from the wasp sting yesterday so im worried its gonna be 'wtf is wrong with you'#but also shouldn't it say something that im here anyway even though i could have rescheduled#but then its like... im not gonna kill myself for this place like i did at mcd and does it give that impression?#or should i have rescheduled bc they'll think it's bad decision making to come anyway with my hand swollen#also worried that i should have parked nearby and come over closer to the time bc am i the freak sitting in the parking lot#but at least im early! but am i too early? but im out here not rushing them. but should i be so they know I Am Interested#not to even mention wtf im gonna say to them to explain my employment gap#and im so paranoid that im gonna go in and say im there for an interview and they're gonna be like ???#bc it was through an automatic text/email thing when i applied#which was how my last job happened but idk. maybe im an idiot and it's all fake so they can point and laugh#and i KNOW thats ridiculous. but that's how it feels rn.#also im worried they'll ask if i want something to eat/drink and i dont know the right answer#like i feel like i should say yes bc what do you mean you wont eat here? but the wrong thing means im taking advantage#and how will i be if im actually working there?#and its all so dumb bc#AGAIN people roll out of bed confident and they're fine. meander their way through and theyre fine. theres no reason to think i wont be#but ANXIETY#its gonna be an out of body experience no matter what and later I'll wonder about all the things i dont remember#if i fucked up or not#and now i have to go in bc it's 7 minutes until my time and i want to be a little early but not too much#fuck#wish me luck#ks talks
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vigilskeep · 1 year ago
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You have talked about having to kill too young for the first time, a Templar. But not the... uh... details.
Having to kill someone is already bad enough/traumatizing, especially as a teen... but a full-on bludgeoning??? Godamn Keir...
it was what you might call a bad day
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jackass-jones · 2 months ago
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Really into the episode of Ouran where this girl confesses her love to Mori but he doesn’t feel the same because he’s into Honey and the girl’s reaction is just like YIPPEE I LOVE YAOI THATS SO COOL FOR YOU YAY 🥰
#the klock keeps ticking#ouran high school host club#i watched ouran when i was 13 and repressed ah the classic experience yes yes#and i always said id rewatch but never did. until now cuz im going through something#im like halfway through and yeah id say theres quite a lot that ages like milk lol#like mostly just the way haruhi is treated is just. bad lol#a good thing is i like how haruhi personally feels about their own gender where they really honestly dont fucking care#which was a big relief cuz similar cases will have the ‘secret girl’ character either be really defensive#or you know. be like a naoto where its actually just the most uncomfortable thing ever#but the problem is the way that tamaki and occasionally the twins are like really obsessed with the girl thing#and constantly want haruhi to take on a feminine role cuz that wouldnt threaten their sexuality as much#tamaki in general is written so fucking weird lol and i do remember being based back then and hating him#and i never liked him with haruhi like im sorry hes just the worst option#hes capable of being funny when hes not being weird but I think he still ends up feeling horribly written#like when hes having his DRAMATIC LOVE INTEREST moments they just feel so horribly out of place#and theyre often times just badly aged tropes also the way haruhi is written in relation to the other members is weird#like i can see why theyd like the other characters but ive not really seen any reasons for them to like tamaki#but then the show will just randomly be like ‘oh yes haruhi thinks tamaki is a lovely person’ and its like. ooookay?#its ass lol and im probably preaching to the choir but like. haruhi is way better with a woman right?#i just know some desperate ass bastards have made some haruhi/renge content and i get it#other than that stuff i dont like i will say i enjoy what exists outside of the weird haruhi stuff#i like the characters and the concept is very funny and the episodes where everyone is normal are charming#and you know i gotta appreciate it for the impact it had on lame ass gay people even if the queer content is messy#ouran was just like. what we had for a long time. or at least was the most popular anime that featured queerness in some positive capacity#but also like. as it goes with this stuff once youve gotten to see better representation#you look back and youre like wow. im so fucking glad we can do better than this dogshit 😩
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dirt-str1der · 17 hours ago
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That post is still pretty active so i have to scroll past that guys bloated festering corpse every time i want to see someones new reply
#Listen to my problems#so im always thinking about it .... they were literally just trying to match my energy they were the most enthusiastic person on the post#i would almost feel bad but their opinions were so trash that i didnt know how to respond in a nice way. i tried really hard but i think you#just hate women. and then i see their idea for a femslash ship and yepp you hate women#lowkey some characters should come with a do not separate label or at lesst with the understanding that they will continue being the most#important people in each others lives even if they choose to date elsewhere ... if there is no ship that can beat canon then you must#be doing something wrong ... provide some better rationale idk ... some pairings feel very cheap and soulless because youve fundamentally#misunderstood the character ... but also im in constant agony because theyre the only person who mentioned kohahyo and i fCKING LOVEkohahyo#but they called it hyohaku so its over and we cant be friends#WHY DID THEY HAVE TO BE THE ONLY ONE ITS SO OVER COME ONNNNN GUYS#the whole reason i signalled for hetships is because i was waiting for kohahyo ... but nobody came ... except that one guy#and i blocked them for being enthusiastic and friendly because i found their opinions so revolting#huh actually thats another thing ... nobody has listed any really problematic ships yet but then again a good portion of people consider#TKSN to be problematic as if youve never broken the neck of your crush before whatever man. wait sorry this is a s/g hate post now hehe ! i#just remembered that s/g shippers like saying 'senku would never fall for his killer!' as rationale for why they refuse to ship it even#after season 2 (thats when they lost so they all doubled down instead of switching) oh my god wait i just thought of that one dj series#okay no i have to finish this thought before its gone. they sound like they dont even believe it because there ARE s/g enemies to lovers aus#out there so the enemies part isnt a real problem you guys just dont want to admit when youre beat honestly this is why early game ships are#so hard becsuse you never know if this guy is gonna be his parallel forever or only sometimes. so im thankful to stanxe for being tksns#parallel to keep it relevant and alive forever and ever and ever male anglerfish style. but yeah s/g fans have no real reason to hate tksn#because tsukasa is fucking awesome so they cant say hes not good enough for senku and thats why they keep parroting that line. even if ...#like if you know senkus character you already KNOW it doesnt matter shit nor fuck to him so the fake reason you gave is ooc and wrong also#but then again thats why theyre so happy because they have enough people to just do whatever they want. much like something else#i need to finish that fic for valentines day
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bisaster-energy · 6 days ago
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polyamory is real I think hancock invented it or something
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ame-to-ame · 12 days ago
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Oh on last rb's note my friend actually read love bullet per my recommendation hehe and she likes it and it makes me so so happy hehe
#kk rambles#when ppl actually look into the things that u rec or are interested in... wowie... hand in marriage (platonic) u.u#omg u actually were listening to me and remembered and looked into it... heart full of love crying tears of happiness...#that one image of the cat crying. that's me. that's me. planting a big metaphorical smooch on your forehead. i love you.#which ik it sounds silly but i get really moved by things like that ok!! my friend sends me alnst memes even tho she hasn't watched it#and it's like oh u were thinking abt me oh u sent this to me just bc i like it 🥺🥺🥺#I can't believe i exist in your mind even when im not there hehe icb u think about me im going to make pancakes for you in the morning.#we are getting a mansion together and living together forever.#everyone's love languages are a little different and mine are so weird lmao what do you mean i get so touched when ppl think of me#do you think you don't exist as a concept when you're not physically there do you think other ppl don't have object permanence lmao#oh wait#yeah it's the effect of dating someone who made u feel like u didn't exist unless u were initiating stuff n engaging w them /j#but my friends are so sweet to me rahhh#i love my friends#why are my standards so low when my friends are all so nice and treat me well 😭😭😭#so mad that my bsf is happily in a relationship (good for her honestly im v happy for her)#bc now I can't go like. if we're single at 30 let's get married. no homo. just that we've known e/o for so long it would be comfortable#it's crazy bc it's not like i want a romantic relationship but i hate feeling lonely but i also really like my own personal space and time#and I don't really like the small inevitable conflicts that arise from close relationships even though it's part of putting the work in#but i like a certain amount of stability and predictability (autism) so i think what i need. is a roommate.#a friend who lives together w me but in separate rooms but i can cook for them type cohabitation lmaoo#but that's kinda idealistic and kinda gay lmao#my friend called me a friend simp and my other friend joked that i should have a queer platonic cule.#like rahhh yeah i really do love my friends a lot i wanna see them forever they're great and amazing and i love them so much#it's nice to be loved!!! it's nice to be cared abt!!! my friends make me really happy!!!#ik from societal standards I'm a deviation and what i feel is more intense than what normal ppl consider friendships to be like but#I don't quite understand the categorization of human social interactions sometimes ig. why should i cap how much im allowed to love someone#if i love someone i want to see them happy and i want to do things for them and I'm not the type to half ass things.#but society is weird abt things and whatnot but it's fine as long as my friends understand and know i love them hehe#anyway love bullet arospec representation!!! let girls shoot people!!! /hj
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liuisi · 28 days ago
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no actually im forever salty about we hunt the flame because it got touted as such good representation and then you read it and its just bad. a book written by an arab author does not good representation make!
#julia.txt#what do you mean your fictional fantasy middle eastern country is called arabiyya. whatdoyou mean. did you think about it for two seconds.#WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SET UP A TYPICAL LOVE TRIANGLE BETWEEN MAIN GIRL-GUY BEST FRIEND-HOT PRINCE GUY#and then the guy best friend DIES in the first few chapters#KILLED BY THE HOT PRINCE GUY#and she gets over it sooooo quick. like its actually crazy#what do you mean these guys are like family awww guys they call each other the arabic word for gang theyre literally like a family .#oh yeah they met like 5 pages ago btw#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS GUY DIES IN THE FINAL BATTLE AND ITS WRITTEN LIKE ITS SUPPOSED TO BE HEARTWRENCHING#BUT WE LITERALLY MET HIM 2 CHAPTERS AGO SO WE COULDNT CARE LESS#awwww guys the hot prince assassin guy has a tragic backstory :( who couldve guessed . no wayyyyy#never read a book that simultaneously felt so long and yet had the most rushed plot ever at the same time#hitting all the benchmarks okay. feminism moment (omg they all thought she was a man because she was a hunter but GASP! she was actually!#a woman all along!#best friend dies . :( . ok im over it#hey this prince guy is kinda hot.#wym theres other people on this island. lets fight them. no nvm were besties now we are LITERALLY family#this prince guy is REALLY hot and oh nooo he has scars :( thats so sad and tragic#uhm and then theres a demon posession thing that happens and dont even REMEMBER IT#which . i dont think your plot should be that forgettable#whatever. whatever. im normal
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months ago
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I’m fairly new to the fandom, but I do have a question if you can answer it! Why do people ship Daigo with Aoki / Masato? I tried looking to see if they’ve interacted before, but couldn’t find anything! Sorry for asking I’m just </3 dumb AND I LOVE YOUR ART OF THEM!!! Nerd looking ahhhhhh
hi ! welcome to the community i hope you're having a lovely time so far and ty for enjoyin my stuff :) no need for apologies it's a very fair question to have :]
i cant speak for everyone (all. ten people into masadai anyway) but Personally To Me i just think the idea of them together is very funny. thats quite literally it im afraid..
#snap chats#//twenty page google doc in the background// ignore that. it's mostly for comedic purposes#might also be my fault idk sorry about that. allegedly. idk ive had like three people tell me they started to ship them cause of me 🧍‍♂️#@mementoasts is another person who's drawn masadai and whose stuff i love and am inspod by .. i love their disneyland fic sm ...#there was another artist on twitter who posted a neat drawing of them but i cant remember who they were and i didnt bookmark it //screams//#recently there's been ANOTHER masadai artist ive started following on twitter - @wifekiryu. his account's n/s/f/w fyi before you go looking#he has a tumblr too @foxdies. i say cause i realized as much recently vjeaKLGJALKGJ#oh but I GUESS ill get deeper into why. /i/ personally ship masadai or whatever#first off they're opposing factions yet their character alignments Do Not Match their roles. stereotypically anyway#aoki who leads the 'surface' of society and is meant to be an admirable figure and someone 'just' when really. he sucks LMAO#though that's not atypical of politicians but just from a stereotypical This Is A Respectable Individual perspective of his role#daigo on the other hand leads the 'underbelly' of society- yk comprised of dangerous criminals and outcasts and whatnot#yet as we know him daigo's compassionate and considerate of his men- he doesnt treat them like tools like aoki does#if put in a room with the two daigo would be most people's choice of person to hang out with. probably open a trapdoor on aoki tbh#and i think thats really cool and epic i always love that kinda Subverting Expectations thing#theres also the fact they both started off like. edgy/angsty in the franchise and then brush up down the line#masato does a stronger 180. publicly. obviously but its still really funny they both have to get their act together#if you wanna talk about in-text reasons. there really is none LMAO I TELLS YOU masadai is pure crack#but if i wanted to pull a muscle reaching then there's daigo being on aoki's side while everyone else is on arakawa's during the funeral#im lying of course. mitsu was behind him. rgg tryna make me forget mitsu exist .... put him back in y8 ....#and ofc ichi joins that side to even out the seating but moving on another Goofy Reason is arakawa being like#'the chairman and my son are like p much the same age Surely he knows how he thinks :)'#and then i just think daigo being all smarmy about outsmarting aoki is really goofy and im choosing to interpret that as personal#they both also have issues with their dad. s. dad/s/. anyway.#tbh the google doc tag was a joke but i really could sit here and list every dumb reason why i think theyre funny together#like i started going over the tag limit so uhhhh yeah needless to say i have a lot of. dumb reasons 💀💀💀💀#one day ill use the main text for long rambles like this but todays not that day Point Is my imagination is rampant im afraid#so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny.#and the unfortunate part is anything i find funny i obsess over for a year so. //gestures to the mountain of bullshit thats my masadai tag/
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smute · 11 months ago
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always so funny when im watching American Entertainment Media and there's a mention of a veteran or an army person or something like they'll go "he's in the navy!" and i'll be like "oh word! kick him harder!" but then they're being extra nice and it always takes me a full minute to rewind my thoughts and manually erase the "(derogatory)" connotation attached to these words
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dragons-and-yellow-roses · 4 months ago
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Just remembered I have a psychiatrist appointment so early tomorrow. And I obviously dyed my hair so recently because there's green staining on my face. I don't think it's going to look great for the bipolar diagnosis, to disclose that I was feeling impulsive and wanted to get control over something, so I dyed my hair at midnight.
#i dont really like this psychiatrist but ive only seen her once so i figured i should give her one more shot#last time i saw her she adked how i liked my anxiety meds#i said i love them. theyre helpful and have no side effects since my body got used to them#and i said i explicitly didnt like ky old ones cuz of how they made me feel#she prescribed the old ones and said i should just tey taking a smaller dose. even though im on meds i like#but the bigger problem is#we went over all my previous medications. ive been on several. a lot of antidepressants especially which is really bad for bipolar#the worst antidepressant cause pericarditis (swelling around my heart) that made me go to the emergency room#we went over that. i told her everything i just told you#my bipolar leans heavily into the depression so she decided to tey another antidepressant along with my mood stabilizer#can you guess which antidepressant she prescribed? can you??#and i didnt realize it at the time because she called it the generic name so i couldnt explain she shiuldnt prescribe me that#and i meant to callher about it but it completely slipped my mind and i thought i had more time#and then suddenly my appointment is tomorrow#or the other thing she recommended was lithium. which feels like wuite an escalation#eapecially since she said it can cause irreversible damage to (maybe remembering this wrong) my kidneys#like i feel like there must be a better option. none of which are anxiety meds i dont like. an antidepressant that sent me to the hospital#or something that could cause irreversible damage. like i feel like theres a better way#i also need to talk to her about setting up an adhd assessment#i had an assessment a few years ago in which i was told im 'too smart to have adhd'#calling adhd people not smart is bullshit. you cant be too smart to have adhd. and i feel like i was just dismissed because im female#he said he wished he could score as hugh as i did on the knowledge tests#man me too. maybe then you wiuldnt be such an idiot. how did you get a license to practice. how did you pass any higher education#are you just a random guy that walked in off the street? i refuse to call him a doctor#i call him a quack or by his full name because i don't think he deserves the respect of that title#what was i talking about. oh yeah trying another assessment with an actual doctor this time#wish me luck with my appointment tomorrow bcuz she might try to kill me again#or dismiss my concerns of adhd like she dismissed my dislike for my old anxiety meds#im in hell. being mentally ill is hell a little bit#actually its not. im fine with my mental illness. im not fine with how doctors treat me because of it
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moeblob · 9 months ago
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Ananza realizing that Deacon's mom was a devoted follower of hers THEREFORE that's her son now, too! And she will dote on him and love him and never pick on him like all the other deities tend to do. That's her precious little boy who lives in another city and rarely gets to see her!
#my characters#deacon gets mocked for being weird by every other deity but her and ymber (though he does think hes a TAD weird)#and ananza is like NOPE THATS MY LIL BOY !!! I LOVE HIM! and after deacon and ymber leave from their visit#she gets all huffy with fulj because YOU COMPLAINED ABOUT DEACON SO MUCH ??? my sweet lil angel?#and fulj just what - hey wait - did we meet the same person? sweet lil angel?#also for if you care cause i definitely do#ananza is like hmmmm since thats my son now i HAVE to give him something but .... ymber is so protective....#and then she is like OH YEAH ! ohime said deacon recognized my dance !#then she is like deacon please come dance with me i formally request a dance come here away from him please here hey#and since deacon is a nice guy hes like ok but i cant really dance well and shes just noooo worries!#and then as they dance she slowly gets him away from ymber and after they are at a decent distance she just#takes his hands in hers and then FWOOSH there's a bunch of wind and deacon is left speechless like ??? what was that?#and so then she is so proud to say that while ymber placed a very PASSIONATE blessing on him she did no such thing!#it is a simple blessing for him since hes like a son to her and hey it might not make you immune to stuff like drowning#but if you are ever in combat which i hope you arent then you will be super duper agile and quiet#and so hes like oh thats pretty cool actually! hey wait what did you mean by passionate hey what#but then the super light footsteps actually are not simply for combat and now hes just a very tall quiet guy#and since he cant remember faces if he sneaks up on someone and they say AGAIN? HOW ARE YOU SO QUIET? hes just#im sorry i didnt mean.... to.... do that.... again.............. (whomst is this and how many times did i spook them)#and ymber is just really happy that thank goodness his blessing and ward act as a GPS and so at least HE knows when deacon is nearby#and fulj is like i hate him even more now did you know he nearly gave me a heart attack like two hours ago ??? this is a crime against me#anyway ananza and deacon are just cute together and hes her precious lil son!
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