#and im coming to love this new version as well’.
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spamlets-blog · 10 months ago
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this is so interesting to me bc imo i kind of love when people take their favorite characters and make them essentially into renamed ocs, like sometimes im like “they would NOT fucking say that!!!” in my head but even then i think its kinda sweet when people love a character so much they impart their entire selves in them. to be loved is to be changed and all that
​in general the vibes hit different when you take a character you love and change them compared to when you make a character from scratch, or at least to me when i make ocs they don’t hit the same as canon characters, so i completely understand why someone would rather take a canon character and flip them on their heads rather than make a whole new oc
some of you would be better off splitting your far removed from canon interpretations into entirely new characters
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lilaccatholic · 1 year ago
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how do i do it though. how do i let go of the bitterness and the hardness when they kept me "okay" for so long? does it come when i finally leave? can it ever?
#babes i actually relate to the frigid angry woman more than im comfortable with but this time there's no prince coming to save her and idk#i was never beautiful but i was and am angry and capable and that's served me well but being angry is exhausting#it's a birthright i can't give to a younger sibling. it doesn't transfer.#i dont inspire devotion. there's no version of this that ends with me waltzing with a true love.#im not the type you launch a thousand ships for.#so what's left?#who am i when i have no one? when ive spent my life making *me* less to make others more? when im nothing but a useful piece of furniture.#i know God loves me! i love Him! but it's not the same. i want *people* to love me. i want to be someone that theyd fight for.#im feeling that 'women have minds and hearts but im so lonely' scene from little women 2019 so much right now.#except im not jo. my family loves me but theyd never do for me what jo's would do for her. theyre also all focused on surviving.#i feel like a military ration. there to be consumed but cast aside the moment something more palatable comes around.#how do i become consumed with joy? how do i let go of the cynicism? its all thats kept me safe! but its choking me too.#its like tony stark in iron man 2. the thing thats kept me alive this far is killing me. i need to find an alternative but its looking like#ill have to synthesize a new element to make it happen and that freaks me out.#ive always been derivative. never an individual. how do i become a trailblazer when my job was always to hold the hand of the one blazing#the trail? how do i become myself happy and free?#because i WANT to be more#i WANT to be more than anger and coldness and a useful idiot. i WANT to be me and be so so happy#but i dont know how to get there#and if someone suggests therapy im shooting you. i dont want to listen to one more person pretend to care about me and tell me#all the things i need to change and spend even longer not learning how to think for myself#i want to be more than this. but i also cant stand the thought of taking up any more space than i do#anyway.#anyone who's read all this thank you and i promise im fine im just in my feelings today lol#im going to work out and get some happy brain chemicals flowing and then ill take a shower and itll all be good.#please dont worry about me! im just having A Moment TM#lilac rambles
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deus-ex-mona · 11 months ago
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youtube
a n y w a y s listen to nagisa’s new song it’ll change your life
#this new v tuber singer dude is excellent at singing ngl. his voice is very upbeat and goes well with the song#[​enojun version waiting room intensifies]#ok but. is it s e r i o u s l y just me or did they actually use a ukulele for this song#idk but that ukulele-sounding instrument reminds me of this guy who would walk around playing his ukulele at school back in the days of yore#the backing track also sounds familiar somehow… like one of those kindness movements/life insurance commercials maybe?#no idea wh y but i can picture nagisa singing this by the beach. y’know. nagisa singing at the nagisa—#this song is def gonna make me laugh or cry (or both) when it gets an mv…#it could be either hilarious or heartbreaking with no in-between#but man. nagisa. his long time crush comes back home looking (presumably) like a maiden in love and he’s just.#‘:( i’m not the one who made her like this :((( but she’s super cute though’#i m mad coping with the thoughts that hiyoko started to fall for nagisa with the distance between them (absence and the fonder heart or sth)#a n d that she only seemed fine when she went back bc she didn’t want him to see her upset about having to leave for the city b u t.#auasusuxuxuxuxhaughhhhhshhshshshshsh im c o p i n g#if hiyo ends up with one of the lips im gonna write a nagisa x the leftover lip enemies to lovers manifesto d o n t t e s t m e o k—#aaaaaaauauaaaaaaaaaaa im sorry i lied when i said i was done with my 2k23 nagisa crisis i’ll be done after this. maybe.#the dude from gamushara
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illuminatedmoth · 2 months ago
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starfield still blows btw
i made this post and tags at 3 am yesterday and apparently drafted it instead of posting. woe my out of context thoughts be upon ye. go forth into my archive with new context after
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3verythingiknowaboutlove · 5 months ago
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yeehaw
how spencer convinces reader to stay in rather than go out
MDNI | suggestive fluff!
word count: 1217
warnings & tags & stuff: fem!reader, def some nsfw descriptions of spence, all around suggestiveness, fade to black
author's note: second piece of writing yayy!!! this was originally gonna be smut but i got scared lol. anyway please lemme know your thoughts im DYING to improve. sooo yes i hope you have a wonderful day and here this is ig! 😚
Sitting alone in your room, you tugged on a pair of never-before worn cowboy boots. They were most definitely not broken in, and you knew you were in for an uncomfortable night of baby blisters on the bottoms of your feet. However, life is full of compromises, and these were too cute to pass on.
Especially for a night of line dancing with your boyfriend’s coworkers. Who knew that FBI agents got down like that?
You stand and plug in your earbuds, choosing to absolutely blast ‘Fearless (Taylor’s Version)’ by Taylor Swift. Also known as the only tolerable country music.
Dancing out to the kitchen, you wrap your arms around your lovely boyfriend who was preparing a cup of tea, absolutely not dressed for a night of country conviviality. Spencer looks you up and down, a teasing smile playing on his face.
“Hey cowgirl,” he says, gently removing your earbuds. “Penelope has been texting me on average every 10 minutes about how excited she is for tonight. I hope you’re ready.”
“Oh god,” you laugh. “I wish you were coming too.”
“I know. But that sounds awful,” he says in his matter-of-fact way. “Hey, I do have something for you,” he mentions. You look up at him, and he runs quickly upstairs to grab his bag. He comes down and brandishes his very own cowboy hat. “From the times Penelope didn’t have you to drag along with her and I was her chosen victim.”
“For me?” You ask excitedly. He puts it on you. Although it’s a little big, it 100% completes the look. You look up at him. “Think I would make a good cowgirl?” He peers down at you, trying to tell if you’re joking.
“No,” He goes the serious route and you furrow your brow at him. “You hate the dirt. And the heat,” he explains, emphatically defending himself.
“I guess you’re right. I don’t really do well with horses either,” you murmur.
“You do make a cute cowgirl for the night though, even if it’s not your true calling.” He ruffles your hat.
“Yeah?” You smile. “It’s not too much with both the boots and the hat?”
Spencer blinks.
“Have you met Penelope? She always has a lot going on. More than this.”
You giggle.
“They’ll all adore you, JJ, Emily,” he reassures, stroking the side of your waist.
You had known Penelope for a few months, ever since you started dating Spencer. But you had yet to meet the rest of the girls on his team. You were definitely excited, they seemed really cool. But you were definitely also nervous.
Spencer, jarring you from your thoughts, whips out his very outdated phone that he somehow still manages to operate, and opens the camera.
“Smile.” You do so, showing off all your teeth. You move to look at the picture, and Spencer tilts the screen toward you. “See? Adorable.”
You stand on your tippy toes for a kiss, and he complies quickly. A little too quickly to not have any meaning behind it. Your eyes flit down, and you notice a slight bulge in Spencer’s pants that wasn’t there a few minutes ago.
You raised your eyebrows and looked up at him. “Can I convince you to stay?” He whispers, half smiling. You tilt your head.
“Maybe” you say shyly.
“What if I told you that the chances are slim to none that you are actually going to line dance tonight? Penelope and JJ always end up sitting at the bar, and Emily always gives up half a song in and joins them. Without fail,” he says. You purse your lips, heart beating a little faster for whatever reason.
“That could still be fun,” you reason.
“Not in those shoes,” he says, rubbing your hip softly. “I know they must hurt; they’re brand new and you’re already shifting your weight between your feet much too frequently.”
You look down at your feet. He was not lying. “You’re too observant. This is why you basically always have your way with me.” You exhale.
“By caring about you? I could keep going. I know that you hate country music. And no, Taylor Swift does not count. She’s an outlier. And she was born in Pennsylvania. That’s barely real country music. You’d be miserable all night.”
“Yes, you would know about ‘real’ country music, Mr. Las Vegas,” you counter.
“That would be Dr. Vegas to you,” he quips, bending down once again and giving you a kiss. You reciprocate, kissing the corner of his mouth. “What if I told you I really wanted you to stay? Bad?”
“Bad? I guess I’ll stay, if it’s bad. But you have to be the one to text Penelope,” you say begrudgingly. As if you weren’t as releived as can be. And as if Spencer didn’t know that.
He smiles and allows his arms to wrap around your waist. Spencer’s kisses become slower, you could feel every aspect of them. His lips, of course, but also his stubble. The air being pushed out of his nose. The hand swiping it’s typical resting spot, your cheek. His tongue delicately tracing your mouth. It all feels so calculated for you, so measured.
And you, on the other hand, are a mess, trying to keep up. Your heart is pounding and you’re sure your face is noticeably hot. And by the time Spencer leads you to your room and sits you down on the bed, its temperature has only increased.
You kick off your boots. He sits next to you, his hands holding your waist, ever so firm. He brings them up, thumbing the inside hem of your tank top.
“All good?” He checks.
“Yeah,” you say, head spinning with all the good chemicals.
“Deep breaths for me, okay? Gotta keep your blood flowing appropriately,” he reminds you, leaning back and taking you in. “Pretty girl.” You blush and his hands move to your lower back over your tank top, delicately brushing over in a way that gives you goose bumps. You shiver.
His eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “You’re sensitive in your lower back. God, there’s still so much more to learn about you.” He breathes out.
“Good. I was scared you’d get bored, with your perfect memory and all,” you joke.
“Bored? The human brain is limitless. Your brain is limitless. I wanna know everything I possibly can that goes on up there. Everything that makes it feel good. It’s the least boring thing I can think of.” You blush and look down.
You lean in for another kiss, this time to his jawline and neck. Your hands slide up his stomach under his shirt a little and and you look up to him.
“Okay?” This time you ask.
Spencer nods. “Okay.” Your hands trace up under his own shirt, and you immediately lean in to kiss him, holding his chin.
All of a sudden he’s everywhere. Even sitting next to you, he manages to take over every ounce of your body. He’s kissing your mouth and forehead and cheeks, one hand is holding your face, and the other is mapping your stomach.
“Can we try something new then? If we wanna do and learn everything?” You whisper. One quick tête-à-tête later, you’re sitting on his lap, shifting your hips softly as he held your waist for you.
“I guess I was wrong. You’re gonna be an amazing cowgirl.”
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kazumist · 5 months ago
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THE NAME OF LOVE .ᐟ
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✩ — the three times hoshina soshiro dismissed his feelings for you as something that friends do and the one time he realized otherwise.
✩ — request: IVE BEEN WANTING TO REQ U SOMETHING FOR SO LONG NOW I HOPE U DONT MIND !! can i ask for hopeless romantic reader and hoshina soushirou.... the way he... is...... (LOVE PESSIMIST 🫵) I'm a sucker for hoshina falling first or confessing first but it is truly up to you!! i genuinely have no idea where im going with this so pls feel free to change anything to your liking
✩ — includes: hoshina soshiro x gn!reader. fluff. cw: uhm funky pacing bc this is just pure word vom LAWLZ. wc: 3583 (i did not expect for it to be this long i swear). reader works for operations and is considered as second best to okonogi (is also okonogi's assitant). ikaruga and okonogi cameo yipee! hoshina is bad at feelings ™. reblogs and feedback are much appreciated !!
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to love is something you cannot name.
that’s a saying that stitched itself onto your brain because it just makes sense. loving someone has way too much depth, depending on the person who is the one lending out their heart and who they are giving it out to in the first place. it could be named as anything, depicted as anything, or interpreted as anything.
especially for you, who had witnessed, watched, read, and consumed all sorts of media that named love as numerous things. sometimes love is tragic, making two people feel so much just for them to get pulled away from each other when they were so close to running into each other’s arms. sometimes love is mirthful, having two people become the best versions of themselves around the person they love because they feel safe becoming vulnerable with the other. yet sometimes love is bittersweet, accepting the art of letting go as it was for the best—accepting that things weren’t just meant to be but not forgetting the emotions the person made you feel.
well, how were you supposed to know what love really is? a hopeless romantic is hopeless for a reason.
having a day off is quite rare, even for the employees of the operations department. the work was quite demanding, as any job involving the JAKDF was. but you still made time to relax and enjoy your rest from time to time, whether that was rewatching a good old romcom film from the 2000s or reading a new romance novel you decided to pick up.
it was normal for a hopeless romantic to dream. to fantasize. that maybe they could experience an extraordinary love like it is portrayed in films or described in songs. so naturally, as a hopeless romantic yourself, you weren’t any different. you just wanted to experience love—to be loved.
then again, liking someone does count as experiencing romance in a sense. admiring someone with traits the public doesn’t really notice is… rare. but that’s how it always went with you. though you wouldn’t really say that you actually acted upon your feelings, they're usually be gone once that person has stepped out of the current environment you’re in.
that’s how it was before.
vice captain hoshina was a respectable man. he is talented, and he sure as hell knows it. as the ton put it, you and the vice captain had a strange relationship—nobody really knows what to call you two. as the secondary leader of operations and okonogi’s assistant, it was only natural to be in the presence of the vice captain most of the time. but there’s just something different when it comes to how you two treated each other.
from flirtatious remarks and confusing gestures that you aren’t sure if you’re supposed to interpret as romantic, just what were you to the vice captain? you’ve observed long enough that he only does this to you. though you don’t really hate it. in fact, you like it that he’s only like that to you—but you weren’t supposed to like him, you swear! but honestly speaking, how could you not? you had plenty of reasons to like the vice captain in that way. you just pray that no one has really noticed it.
however, okonogi wasn’t stupid. she gets praised for her analytical skills for a reason and you wish she didn’t have to use those skills when it came to your romantic interest in the vice captain of all things. she promised to keep it a secret, though, and keeping secrets is a thing okonogi was really good at (to your surprise).
— — — — — — — — 
the first time hoshina denied his feelings for you was when he overheard some rookies talking about you.
“(l/n) is such a blessing to the third division, don’t you think?” one said as the other hummed in agreement. “i know, right? they’re so nice! did you know that they helped me once? they gave me tips on what i should do to enhance my combat power for my fighting style; it was really helpful too!” the rookie beamed. hoshina had an unsettling feeling churning inside of him as he eavesdropped on the conversation. but he quickly shook it off, thinking that he probably ate something funny earlier.
but why hasn’t he received such treatment from you? you were closer to him than some rookies, right? 
right?
wait, what the hell is wrong with me? hoshina thinks, snapping out of his earlier thoughts. he was not jealous of some rookies. those were just rookies, for christ’s sake! hoshina walks away, only to be greeted by the sight of you and ikaruga talking this time.
“thanks again for the film recommendation the other day, (l/n). i didn’t expect to enjoy it so much—you were completely right! it did suit my preferences,” he excitedly says. hoshina watches silently, observing everything in detail. and one thing he notices is that ikaruga is standing close to you—way too close than he preferred.
“really? i’m glad you liked them, ikaruga. feel free to ask for more film recs when you’re free.” you laughed at his enthusiasm. ikaruga had always been a fun person to converse with, in your opinion. and you two bonded over films! but it was really nothing more than that. “will definitely do!” he replies, giving you a two finger wave as he excuses himself.
he was definitely not jealous. why would he be jealous in the first place? you two were just friends.
and friends don’t get jealous like this.
— — — — — — — — 
the second time was when he was undergoing recovery after the whole fiasco of the tachikawa base raid. everyone was exhausted. it was fortunate that the third division didn’t get any casualties during the incident; the majority of the troops were only injured for the most part. soshiro was counted among the severely injured troops but he doesn’t regret it one bit.
or so he thought.
soshiro wakes up slowly, blinking and squirting his eyes at the sudden brightness of the light above him. he felt a weight on the side of his bed when he tried to get up, as if something (or someone) was pressing down on the blanket. looking down, he wouldn’t mistake your hair for anyone else. he knew it was you with just a glance.
and there you were, sleeping softly on the side of hoshina soshiro’s bed. soshiro takes note of your appearance that he could see right now—which was really just your messy hair. he gets up, making sure that you don’t wake up. it is likely that the operation has not had much sleep up to this point, which is why you ended up sleeping in his hospital room of all places.
he feels bad. a hand slowly reaches out to your head, stroking it ever so gently. if he were to be honest, he was worried for he operations team during the attack. he recalls regularly checking in to see if things were okay on your end, and you kept reassuring him that everyone was unscathed. his other hand reaches out to his phone on his bedside, checking to see if he missed anything. he was unconscious until now, he thinks. and the text from okonogi just confirmed all of his suspicions.
you’re probably still unconscious by the time i sent this, but they’ve been there every day since you got admitted. 
that’s all the message contained. soshiro glances at you again, a soft smile tugging on his lips. he doesn’t get why okonogi felt the need to send him that text, but the thought of you waiting for him to be conscious again made him feel… warm inside. but it all went away as he pulled back his hand from your head as you stirred awake. you raised your head, adjusting yourself to be in a more comfortable position as you rubbed your eyes with your knuckles. 
shock was an understatement when you realized that he was finally awake.
“vice captain! i—sorry, i didn’t mean to sleep on your bed. wait, are you okay? does anything hurt?” he just stared at your eyes, trying to process something. shock was still present in your eyes, and relief was mixed in them too. you noticed him not answering anything you said. worried that he might be suffering from some aftereffects, you asked him again. “uhm… vice captain hoshina?”
he snaps out of it as soon as he hears his name. “sorry, i was just thinking. what were you saying?”
“er… is there something on my face? you’ve been staring at my face the whole time since i woke up…”
hoshina blinks once. twice. then thrice. before he focuses his gaze on something else, looking away from you. you held back a laugh at the sight of red tinting his ears as he apologized for his actions. 
“i’m glad you’re alright, vice captain.”
hoshina freezes. he didn’t expect those words to have a bigger impact on him than they do now. but this is all natural, isn’t it? friends worry about each other. friends wish and hope that the other is okay.
yet why does he feel bitter when he labels this as something that friends—no, snap out of it. he thinks.
“i’m glad you’re alright too.”
— — — — — — — — 
the third time was when you were sent to work to the first division of all places. he was completely against it, of course, but he doesn’t have any concrete reason to actually protest against it. 
it was quite boring to not have you there. he didn’t really have anyone to disturb anymore. and the sudden change in the vice captain’s demeanor doesn’t go unnoticed by the platoon leaders. sure, he still had the same toothy grin on his lips, with his fang peeking out ever so often but deep down, you can’t really point out if it was genuine.
after all, hoshina soshiro was good at concealing his emotions and thoughts.
but then again, okonogi wasn’t stupid. it pains her to be the one who’s stuck between the vice captain and her subordinate. soshiro was the same as the night he didn’t get to neutralize kaiju no. 8 back then. shoulder slumped, arms crossed, a slight pout on his lips, and an expression that clearly stated he was pondering about something—or perhaps someone?
“you miss them, don’t you?” okonogi suddenly asks as she organizes the paperwork in front of her. working with hoshina when it came to paperwork wasn’t really new, except for this time because you would also be present in times like these. “miss who?” he decided to play dumb (or is the right term indenial?)
“please don’t make me spell it out for you, vice captain.” she replied, pushing up her glasses.
hoshina doesn’t reply, zoning out as he thinks about okonogi’s words. well, it wasn’t really false that your sudden absence had changed things in the vice captain’s usual routine. he doesn’t see you making a cup of coffee after he finishes training in the middle of the night. nor does he see you drowning yourself in research at the library when you’re not in the operations room, where soshiro would personally lend you a hand and provide his own insights on whatever you’re researching.
oh. 
oh.
he does miss you.
but that’s just normal, right? friends miss each other. and friends tend to leave sometimes but they will always come back when the time is right. however, the head of operations for the third division didn’t have to be some kind of genius to put two and two together. 
the vice captain has some sort of interest in you as well; he just hasn’t realized it himself.
— — — — — — — — 
the day you returned from the first division was the day everything went back to normal for soshiro.
it was currently a quarter after one in the morning, and he had just finished his training. he ended up going more overtime than usual, but if he hadn't, he probably would’ve missed the open door to the library at this hour. and of course, being the ever so curious man he is, he takes a peek in.
and again, there you were. but this time, you were drowning yourself again in research. your hair was a bit messy, and the eyebags doesn’t go unnoticed by him. yet in spite of that, soshiro still found your appearance to be lovely. maybe it was just the fatigue from his training, or perhaps it’s the thought of you being so determined in your work that sparked such a thought in him.
regardless of what the reason actually was, soshiro found your appearance lovely despite it all.
“you should head to bed soon.” he says, approaching the table you were currently working on. you looked up, surprised to see him awake at this hour. but you put your focus back on your work, not even giving him a second glance—which surprised the vice captain. he reads on whatever you were working on, noticing that they were mostly reports of kaiju no. 9. 
“researching on kaiju no. 9, i see. need a hand?”
“there’s just something off about him and i can’t put my finger on it. also thanks, but no thanks. i can handle this myself, vice captain.”
“it’s almost two in the morning, are you sure about that?”
he didn’t quite catch on to what your reply was, but he was positive that you just declined his offer either way. hoshina decides to pull up the chair beside you and grab the small stack of reports in front of you. he rotates the lamp a bit in his direction, but just enough to leave some light for you to read as well if you needed to.
you sigh at him. “vice captain, you really don’t have to—”
“but i want to. it’s the least i could do.”
truth be told, you really can’t bring yourself to be in the presence of the vice captain now. everything was just confusing. you were aware that the vice captain doesn’t really like paperwork in general (who even likes paperwork in the first place?) but you don’t get why he’s so insistent on helping you every time he finds you here.  
you don’t get why he likes your company so much. you considered yourself to be plain, a bit mundane for someone to actually spend some time with. especially when your interests don’t really spark any others for the most part. 
and while you may be a hopeless romantic, you weren’t foolish. even if you like the vice captain who’s currently making an effort to help you with your work, he’s just way out of your league. he’s too high to reach, and you were sure as hell that he would never actually look at you in that way. not now, not ever.
but why? why does a part of you keep saying that maybe he does? he wouldn’t do all of that if he didn’t actually look at you in that way, right? hope is a dangerous thing for someone who doesn’t know how to stop. for someone like you who refuses to give up on most occasions. it was stupid. foolish. naive.
not now, not ever would hoshina soshiro actually look at you that way.
“vice captain, please get some rest.”
“i could say the same to you.”
god, why is this man so stubborn? is he not tired from all the late night training he does? you thought, slowly getting frustrated. hoshina tells you his observations based on the reports in his hands and shares his hypothesis on the matter. he had some valid points and he’s lending a great hand at the moment. but frustration was just getting the best of you at the moment from your numerous trains of thought.
“the fact that he can adapt so easily is scary in itself. and the recent report of him breaking in the operations room in the first division states that—”
“why are you doing this?” you cut him off.
hoshina stares at you, dumbfounded at your question. he opens his mouth to answer, but no words actually come out of him. he chuckles bitterly in his mind. soshiro would like an answer to that question as well. but then it dawned on him. every flashed across his mind in seconds, and he finally realized it.
yet the result of that still scared him.
he was in love. hoshina soshiro is in love—with you nonetheless. the person he swore was just a friend. it took him quite a while to realize it, always being in denial that it was just normal for friends to act the way you two were. but he was in love. and that scared him. because what is he supposed to do when he finally realizes that you have consumed him? he never wanted this to happen, not in a million years.
but perhaps he was in love with you long before he started tripping along the lines of being friends and something more.
why are you doing this? your question echoed in his head. because i love you, he swallows back down his throat. he can’t say it. there’s no way things would work out. he could die any day and he’d rather not see you miserable because of his death. it would be better if you found someone else—but how ironic. he couldn’t really handle the thought of you being with someone else in the first place.
why are you doing this? your question echoes again. “because i love you.” he finally says, hesitant even. hesitant to know what you’re reaction was going to be. your eyes went wide at the sudden confession, and hoshina was certain that you wouldn’t believe him (well, he couldn’t really believe it either). “you’re kidding me,” you replied.
“i’m not.”
and surely enough, the look on the vice captain’s eyes said it all. he was dead serious. "i... why?” it's ten past two in the fucking morning, and you were too scared to accept that all of this was occurring right now, so you were afraid to ask. you were too scared to just randomly wake up and realize that maybe it was all a dream. too scared to believe that your feelings are being reciprocated.
“because you’re different—different to me, if that makes sense. it’s like you have this effect when it comes to me. food tastes better whenever i share a meal with you; my day just feels more peaceful whenever i get to see you’re doing fine, and i realized that maybe i haven’t actually looked at you like a friend or coworker for as long as i can remember; i was just too stupid to realize it earlier.” he avoids his gaze for a moment before looking at you again.
“i love you. i want you to look at me and love me too. we’ve come too far to turn back. i’m already too deep into you.”
you were speechless. 
he loves you. he loves you. he loves you. it repeated like some sort of chant inside of your head as you processed everything. hoshina soshiro loves you back—who would’ve thought? you hadn’t realized that he was sitting so close to you. the tension was so thick, but you easily cut it down as you started with your response.
“you’re an amazing man, vice captain, and i truly cannot grasp how you could feel such feelings towards me, but i love you too.” you could see hoshina jump in his seat in shock at your confession, but you continued. “i love you in ways you have never been loved, for reasons that you may not have been told, for longer than you think you deserve and with more than you will ever know existed inside of me. yet i can’t help but still wonder… how? why? wait no, why was already answered—”
he chuckles at you. stopping you with your words. “what’s so funny?” you pouted at him. “it’s nothing. i just can’t believe that we’re seriously having this moment at two in the morning.”
“sorry, i think that may have been on my part. i kind of snapped there because i was just so… confused.”
“confused?”
“yeah, confused if we’ve crossed the line between friends or lovers without actually realizing it. crazy, right?”
hoshina moves a bit closer to you, making the distance between the two of you smaller than before. he puts his forehead against yours. “not really, but i look at you, and i just love you, and it terrifies me. it terrifies me what i would do for you. i’m in love but i’m also terrified—that’s what i think is crazy.”
“then let’s be terrified together,” you whispered to him.
a soft laugh leaves his lips this time. “i like the sound of that.” he whispers back.
he loves you.
and you love him back.
that’s all what matters.
love, in general, can make you feel all sorts of things. joy, confusion, anger, fear, and many more. it can also make you do all sorts of things. it can make you do things you never really imagined doing for or with someone in the first place. it tends to be irrational—ridiculous, even. but the thought of doing all of it for the person you care most about? you finally realized that’s simply what love is all about for you.
to love is something you truly cannot name.
442 notes · View notes
maplesyrupsainz · 9 months ago
Text
˖⁺。˚⋆˙we're over | MV1 DR3˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: max verstappen x fashion designer!reader y/n (she/her) x daniel ricciardo
genre: social media au
warnings: none just fluff
summary: in which they are over (this time) and she has space for someone else in her heart
a/n: LOVE this request hehe ty so fun to do an alternative ending!!!
request!!!: hi! just saw your requests were open and i was wondering if you'd do a version of do-over where they don't get back together and she ends up with someone else(doesn't have to be on the grid could be like a hockey boy or anyone)
fc: maggie lindemann
my masterlist
original ending
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, yoursister, and 83,238 others
twitter ->
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messages ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, yourbff, and 927,194 others
yourusername heard you need inspiration
view all 18,293 comments
yourbff my girl forever nd ever ⭐️
liked by yourusername
user1 new fan gained
user2 omg i rmmbr her from when she dated max & now im just rediscovering her she's sooo gorgeous wtaf
user3 i can't believe max fumbled her
user4 my competition for her hand jus tripled
user5 quadruped more like
user6 max verstappen found dead
user7 cant wait for a new collection
yourusername posted a story
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff, and 318,928 others
ynupdates I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
yourusername i love u 🫀🫀
user8 u are fr the coolest girl in the world
yoursister so proud of you 🥹
yourusername stop it you'll make me emotional 😭
user9 you are so so loved
user10 nothing you could've said would put us off supporting u forever 🤘
messages →
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instagram ->
maxverstappen1
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 719,948 others
maxverstappen1 life lately ⏰
view all 15,283 comments
user11 waiting for y/n to follow him back
user12 he re-followed her?!?!
user13 i need to know what's going on have they spoken since the podcast?!!
user14 exes to lovers whennnn
user15 he's so cute
landonorris why is your comment section so full up of drama max
maxverstappen1 i didnt ask for this
user16 max is so tired of us LOL
user17 not sorry
user18 i love drama
user19 max acting dumb like he didnt post this to get her attention
messages ->
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instagram ->
ynupdates
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liked by user17, user3, and 18,294 others
ynupdates y/n y/l/n spotted tonight outside a restaurant with f1 driver daniel ricciardo, following the release of a podcast episode on which y/n discussed her feelings on how her previous relationship (with max verstappen) played out. this comes following speculation about y/n and max rekindling their romance, but she has perhaps moved on to his ex-teammate and friend instead. we are sending our love to y/n as always!
view all 6,183 comments
user20 omg what is happening
user21 wtf is she on a date with daniel???
user22 & i was so certain her & max would get back together....
user23 maybe she's trying to make him jealous 😂
user24 some of u guys are delulu af
user25 what i would give to be a fly on the wall
user26 i hope he treats her well
yourusername
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liked by yourbff, maxverstappen1, and 798,373 others
yourusername never lonely 🖤
view all 6,183 comments
user27 omg first time we've seen y/n with her guitar in ages
user28 the guitar omg
yourbff best girl in the world
yourusername i love u
yoursister hard at work or hardly working?
yourusername shut up you
user29 MAX IN THE LIKES
user30 omg???? is there still hope
user31 something is happening
user32 there's something in the air 🤔
yourusername posted stories
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liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, and 134,293 others
yourbff ???? are you being rizzed up
yourusername perhaps
yourbff better not be by an f1 driver thought we learned our lesson
yourusername of course not
user33 soft launch much
user34 daniel???
user35 IS IT DANIEL OR MAX
user36 the flowers, the resting ur head on a man's shoulder... this is a soft launch bro
ynupdates y/n pls acknowledge the pap pics 🫶🚨
user37 where u at y/n
twitter ->
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instagram ->
ynupdates posted a story
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liked by user22, user8, and 84,283 others
user43 oh my god it's real
user44 NO WAY??? IS SHE BACK IN THE PADDOCK??
user45 and she said just friends 🤨
user46 this is the craziest thing to happen to f1 imo
user47 oh netflix are gonna eat this up
user48 SHE IS NOT SLICK
yourusername posted a story
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liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1, and 548,293 others
charles_leclerc i will say i am shocked but happy beyond words to have you back!
yourusername ❤️❤️ catch up soon!
danielricciardo back for good
yourusername dont speak too soon
user49 SHAMELESS
user50 you got that new relationship glow
yourbff fantastic
yourusername shush you
ynupdates not you pretending you arent ecstatic
ynupdates posted a story
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liked by danielricciardo, user44, and 128,103 others
user51 you sound thrilled
ynupdates trying to pretend like i care about racing 😀
user52 "just friends" yea right
yourusername never trust what y/n says 💀
user53 not her in the tauri garage there's no way they arent dating
yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, and 828,045 others
yourusername weekend off
view all 5,921 comments
user54 they're just friends they're just friends they're just friends
user55 i don't believe it for a second
yourbff get back to work
yourusername im busy right now
yourbff oh i wonder what with
user56 danny ric danny ric danny ric
user56 she gets prettier everytime i see her
danielricciardo so glad to have you back on the paddock y/n ❤️
yourusername glad to be back !
user57 they are so stiff
user58 they are trying to trick us into thinking they arent dating
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, yourbff, and 982,193 others
yourusername all the good in my life
tagged: danielricciardo, yourbff
view all 21,283 comments
user64 SHE LOOKS SOOO HAPPY
ynupdates her smile 😭😭😭
yourbff the way you're glowing
liked by yourusername
danielricciardo i love you
yoursername i love u too 🥹🫶
user65 ill never recover
user66 the new f1 it couple
user67 best wag of all time
user68 cant wait to buy all of y/n's new collection
user69 literally same it looks soo cool
danielricciardo
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liked by yourusername, yourbff, and 1,284,083 others
danielricciardo i won
tagged: yourusername
view all 34,838 comments
ynupdates omg she is so hot what the hell
danielricciardo you're telling me
user70 OH MY GODDD
user71 her in daniel's car oh myyyy
yourusername wow
yourusername i love u fr
danielricciardo ❤️
maxverstappen1 you're welcome everyone
danielricciardo you do not get credit for this
maxverstappen1 i feel like i do
yourbff absolutely not
yourusername thanks for giving us your blessing max
maxverstappen1 🥰
user72 this feels like closure
THE END 🤍
660 notes · View notes
byuntrash101 · 8 months ago
Text
damnation of a saint (teaser)
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pairing — nun!reader x sin of lust!seonghwa ft. ateez as the other sins
rating — smut | mdni
wc — ~13k (teaser is 1.2k)
synopsis — life is dull when you are an immortal being such as seonghwa. every day is the same and you live (or rather, merely exist) through the times crushed by the burden of boredom. until something new comes along in the form of a kind, compassionate and righteous newly ordained nun. and so the sin of lust makes it his personal mission to corrupt the purest of souls: yours.
release date — OUT!!! LINK HERE
nsfw tags under the cut
tags — heavy religious/blasphemous themes (don't read if you're uncomfy <3), inclusive writing (reader is not described), also reader is the embodiment of purity and selflessness, 20240127 hwa (will to power d1 in seoul), kinda slow burn kinda vibes, tensionnnnn, sooo much teasing, dom!hwa, also very sly demon!hwa, supernatural sex, corruption kink (obviously), masturbation (f), oral (f), the (un)holy trinity = teasing + begging + mind breaking, some light impact play, breath play, hair pulling, fingering (f), monster cock!hwa, size training, pet names (angel, love, darling, sweetheart), praising, degradation (slut, whore), dumbification, multiple orgasms (f), overstim and more to be revealed in the full version <3
a/n: consider this teaser as the moodboard of the fic <3 also im so excited to be reworking on my fave fic ever. hope you enjoy it too <3
ateez masterlist | navigation
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Seonghwa was bored out of his mind. Like he had been for decades now, even centuries. He couldn’t remember what it was like to feel… well… anything at all really. And after years upon years of vegetating he didn’t care enough to even try anymore. He just laid there, endlessly staring blankly at the emptiness. He tapped his slender finger on his thigh, comfortably set on the bed of dark purple smoke he had materialized out of thin air.
He let out an audible annoyed groan as he was nonchalantly stretching out his long limbs which didn’t fail to catch the attention of the others.
“What’s wrong?” Yeosang asked as he was feasting on some delicious meal he poofed out magically. He didn’t even take a second to look up the bucket full of chicken drumsticks, wrapping his greasy fingers around the bone and eyeing the meat like one would their life long partner. But then again, that wasn’t too far from the truth for Yeosang.
“I’m bored” Seonghwa complained, pushing his long silky black hair back on his forehead and choosing to ignore Yeosang’s lack of interest, dragging out the word on his tongue, transmitting his state of utter apathy to the others.
“Why don’t you go up and play with the Humans?” Mingi suggested while checking himself out in the mirror, readjusting his bangs and sliding his sunglasses up the bridge of his nose before striking a pose to himself, remaining completely self absorbed.
Once again, Seonghwa wasn’t getting much attention from his counterparts but he was somewhat used to it when it came to Mingi.
“What’s the point? They are no fun anyways!” Seonghwa sat up straight and crossed his long elegant legs on the cloud of cotton like smoke.
“Why?” Jongho asked, unlike the others he deigned looking in Seonghwa’s direction with somewhat surprised eyes. “You used to love going around and breaking up happy marriages, luring men and women in with your charms… That was always fun!” He said a little sluggishly, but still with as much enthusiasm as he could muster.
“Yeah… Maybe it was…” Seonghwa replied. “Two millenniums ago…” Another prolonged sigh. “When everything still felt fresh.” He got up from the comfortable cloud of smoke, pacing the endless void as his heels clacked and echoed with each step.  “Now I know that Humans are only self centered vile creatures who only claim to have better morals than us because they are scared of the consequences that inevitably ensue from succumbing to their primal desires. When in fact, all they want is to eat, kill, have sex or not do anything at all. They are nothing short of underdeveloped, unevolved, spineless piles of meat” 
“Meat? Where?” Yeosang said, finally lifting his head from the bucket of fried chicken to look around, eyes rounded in panic.
Not a single one of them reacted except Mingi who side eyed him with disdain before returning to more important matters at hand such as swapping the aviator sunglasses for narrower, more rectangular ones.
“That’s not entirely false” Jongho concluded, shrugging, easily giving up on the idea of comforting Seonghwa.
“I mean where’s the fun if you can’t break their minds to give in?” Seonghwa placed both hands on Jongho's shoulders, slightly shaking him while the latter lifelessly swayed back and forth. “What is the point if they don’t resist the call of evil? If you can’t erode their will like a rock made smooth by the incessant beating of the waves of the cruel sea.” Seonghwa huffed in a quiet, defeated voice, letting go of Jongho's shoulders to let his arms hang at his side while the other one stared at him blankly.
“Hm… okay” Jongho said before slipping off Seonghwa's reach to take his place on the fluffy bed of purple smoke, crashing head first onto the soft cloud.
A silence settled for what seemed like a long moment, even for them, immutable creatures to whom the very concept of time couldn't grasp at their permanence.
“Well you never tried with that girl…” Wooyoung said, slithering his way to Seonghwa without a sound. He had been watching the scene unfold from afar up until then. “What was her name already?” He snapped his fingers and looked to the side trying to access his memory. He turned to Mingi for help but he was too busy looking through the mirror, slipping on yet another dangling necklace and smirking, satisfied at the results.  Wooyoung then tried his luck with Yeosang but he now had his face buried in a huge bowl of chicken broth, the empty bucket of fried chicken abandoned and slurping up a big mouthful of noodles in a rather unpleasant way. “Jongho?” he called, finally settling for the one that looked almost passed out on the bed of smoke, but still this one wielded the most positive result.
“Y/n” Jongho responded without conviction, still laying flat on the cloud of smoke, eyes growing heavier by the second.
“Yeah! That’s right!” Wooyoung exclaimed. “That girl is unbreakable,” he affirmed. Seonghwa scoffed and threw an unconvinced look to his peer.
“No really! I’ve tried to corrupt her but I really couldn’t”. Wooyoung said, raising his brows and talking loudly to support his point. But that did little to persuade Seonghwa, he was convinced that Wooyoung was just not as good as him at breaking the mortals’ souls. So yes, it was possible that Wooyoung had struggled with that girl. But not him, surely not him.
When Wooyoung saw Seonghwa was not budging his face dropped, and he turned to the others. “Please someone back me up on this one” 
“Oh yeaaah… I remember her” Yeosang said, voice cut by various sounds of loud lips smacking and open mouth chewing. “Even I tried!”
Now, that was different. Seonghwa was interested. Most people are quick to indulge themselves when it comes to food. It was, so to speak, the easiest sin of the seven to succumb to. The Humans often say “there’s always room for dessert” and innocently eat a generous slice of cake after devouring a full meal. They don’t even notice Yeosang forcing the big spoon full of buttery sugary goodness into their mouths. They don’t even know Yeosang, himself, made this saying. 
“She refused to even do as much as taste the delicious meal I made her sister cook her even though she was starving… instead she gave it to the homeless man living not far from her apartment.” Yeosang stated with aberration shaking his head in disappointment before plunging right back in the ramyeon bowl.
“Mhm” Seonghwa scratched his chin, his curiosity for the mysterious righteous girl was piqued.
“One day I tried to make her give in” Jongho chipped in from the dark purple smoke bed, even pushing himself on his elbows to look at the others, to Seonghwa’s surprise. “Made her miss the train and the bus she needed to take to get home after work and conveniently laid a juicy wallet stuffed full of even juicier bills in the gutter. All she had to do was to bend down and get the money to take a taxi to her apartment. But instead she took the money and walked to the police station to report the lost wallet, which was in the opposite direction by the way and then walked back home only to take a shower and leave right after to attend the charity soup kitchen. Anddd… Explaining this made me tired. Please don't talk to me for the next two hundred years, thank you.” Jongho concluded in one single breath before laying back down and turning on his side to nap comfortably.
“Maybe that one can be interesting after all” Seonghwa thought aloud.
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a/n: tell me if you wanna be tagged through comments or through asks <3
ateez masterlist | navigation
598 notes · View notes
loganhowlettshousewife · 21 days ago
Note
request for a logan x reader where logan comforts the reader after they come home from a mission all bloodied up? i see a lot of reader comforting logan fics but im curious to see how itd be the other way round :)
me? responding to a request like three weeks later? it's more likely than you think. also sorry it's so short. originally it turned into smut but i didn't know if you'd want that given the request was for hurt/comfort. (if you guys want i can publish the alternate smut version of this fic too).
solace
summary: you come home from a mission gone wrong and logan helps you through it.
warnings: death (offscreen), blood, non-sexual intimacy, nudity, reader has hair, pet names (logan canonically calls his love interests "darlin'" and this is me pushing that agenda), english is not my first language so please do not be rude
word count: 1004
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you’re splattered in blood and grime, grey ash streaking your skin from the fire created by a little boy lashing out at the world. he had set his own house on fire, his parents dying in the most brutal of ways, burned alive.
“oh princess, c’mere,” logan pulls you into his arms. you’re in too much shock to argue, letting him manoeuvre you like a doll.
you don’t like going on missions, don’t like hurting people. you’re only ever sent on the easy ones, the non-violent ones, where you try to convince mutant kids to join the school. you’re good at talking to children, at getting them to admit their fears to you, at soothing their worries. but even the easy missions don’t always go well.
charles could sense that this particular child was powerful, and far worse than that, he was angry. he’d lashed out when he’d seen you, screamed in anger when his parents expressed a desire for him to go to xavier’s school, to learn to control himself before he came back home again. his parents were frightened too, scared of what might happen if things continued the way they were.
they’d all died in the explosion of his power.
he was so scared. he never meant to hurt anyone, you could see it in his eyes when the fire continued to burn despite him letting go. it was out of control, no longer a part of him that he could control like an extra limb, but something with a mind of its own.
it reminds you of yourself when you’d first discovered your abilities, scared and alienated from the rest of the world, from the non-mutants around you. you see yourself in every kid you save, and in every kid you lose.
you stay in logan’s arms for a long while, the only sound in the room his steady breathing contrasting with your ragged, choked out sobs. his chest rises steadily against yours, a rhythm that you try to imitate but you can’t, and with every failed inhale you feel your frustration grow, your panic increase.
he picks you up easily, and you instinctively wrap your legs around his waist, clutching onto him so as not to fall. he would never drop you, you know that, but it’s always a slight surprise when you’re not expecting him to lift you from the ground.
he leads you to the bathroom where he helps you strip out of your clothes, so gentle with your shaking form. his hands trace each new sliver of skin revealed to him, keeping a firm pressure on you always, grounding you, reminding you of where you are. not in a burning house watching a child’s corpse go pitch black from the flames, but in the house that logan bought the two of you, not too far from the school but enough to give the two of you privacy.
in the shower, the blood rinses off your skin, pink rivulets swirling down the drain. yet you can still feel it, thick and sticky and warm. you want to scrub at your skin until its red and blistering, until you have to grow a new layer of skin, a fresh one that hasn’t been touched by death.
logan doesn’t let you. he catches your hand and whispers, “let me take care of you, darlin’.”
you lean into his bare chest and he massages shampoo into the roots of your hair, over your scalp until it foams, and then rinses it away. he runs your conditioner - the one he always claims is too expensive and why would you spend so much on hair products - through your hair, tugging gently at the strands when he notices you disappearing into your mind.
afterwards he pats you dry, and kisses every inch of your skin, reverent, on his knees before you. and then he rises to his feet and finally presses his lips to yours, soft and intimate, not rushed or heated, just reassurance that he’s here, he’s got you, and he’s not going anywhere.
“do you want to talk about it?” he asks eventually.
you shake your head, “he was just a kid.”
“i know,” logan says, rubbing his large, rough hands over your arms, up and down, “but it’s not your fault, you know that. you can’t control what other people do. d’you blame storm for what happened?”
“no!” you exclaim, eyes wide at the implication that one of your best friends could have caused the boys death.
“but she was on the mission with you,” logan comments, and you shake your head, “if you don’t blame her, you can’t blame yourself. neither of you knew, you couldn’t’ve stopped it.”
“maybe,” you say. you don’t really believe it, but logan knows it’ll take you time to get back to your usual happy self, and he’s fine with staying by your side, whispering praise and reassurance until you start to believe him again.
afterwards, he puts on your favourite movie. he spends the whole time making fun of the characters and their decisions, grumbling about how movies will base their entire plot progression on actions no real, rational person would ever do, until you giggle wetly and slap him in the arm, telling him to shut up and let you watch the film.
you lean back into the circle of his arms and he holds you tight, occasionally wiping stray tears that run down your cheeks. there’s less tension in your muscles now, but you’re not quite relaxed, so he shuffles the two of you around until he can massage your shoulders and back.
you moan at the feeling, sinking into the sensation of his large hands working at the knots, until you’re putty for him. you feel warm and fuzzy by the time his hands start to stray down, massaging your thighs.
“feelin’ better?” he asks as the end credits roll, pressing a kiss to your hair.
“yeah,” you sigh, “thank you for taking care of me.”
288 notes · View notes
serejae · 4 months ago
Text
I LOVE YOU, IM SORRY. | C.SC
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pairing : seungcheol x reader
WHAT !! : in which youre unsatisfied with the way you treated seungcheol throughout your relationship, but destiny will always bring you back….right? (or in which you messed up your relationship with him and the 4 times you tried to fix it and the 1 time it worked out)
warnings: so self indulgent, if ur my ex bby i know we’re still contacted but come back 💔💔💔💔 readers a ass in the beginning, open ending
w.c : 2872
a/n : i never really see angst where the reader messes up and i decided to display it with my experience el oh el . hope you all enjoy
-
you laid in bed beating yourself up for the nth time. youve been in a rotation of screaming into your pillow, walking around the house, and journaling (or at least attempting to) but you still cant get the guilt and regret off your shoulders
its been almost 2 years since, since the argument, since the day you ended things, since the day you ran away afraid of hurting yourself and let alone him even more than you already did.
everyone you know has told you to move on because theyre sure he already has too but its harder said than done, how could you go on with life knowing you hurt someone who was so willing to give you everything you wanted because of your own selfishness
and as bad as it sounded, you hoped he’d reach out first as desperate as you wanting to catch up so you can show him the new version of you. the version who was ready to commit, a better person, willing to love him correctly. not crazy or stupid like the one before, the one he had the unfortunate case of dating
so now youre stuck in this 3 activity cycle because no one wants to hear you mope about your asshole tendencies to seungcheol, youve sent him a couple messages apologizing and hoping to be civil to which he replied accepting every single one a couple hours later
why wasnt it enough though?
its because you wanted more, and you knew it. you wanted him to reply immediately and accept your apology as well as begging you to come back because you knew not even deep
down, straight foward youd accept it
you longed for his ‘good mornings’, ‘i miss you’, ‘i love you’’s that you took for granted
all because of that one day (s)
you decided that this cycle of wanting ends now, all these cowardly attempts will stop. so you grabbed your coat and put on your shoes and drove to his place
to make up for that night and those days
-
“i just dont understand why you wont talk to me whenever you feel a certain way instead of running away” seungcheol sighed as he ran his hands through his hair as he sat on the couch watching you pace around the living room
“what part of ‘i dont want to’ do you not get” you raised your voice slightly as you paused to stand infront of seungcheol
“i dont get it because i love you.” he replied calmly as he reached to grab your hand and caressing it. and as he looked up at you you saw it in his eyes, the longing for those 3 words you never said back to him. he was always patient with you, the first time he said ‘i love you’ to you he saw the hesitation and understood, he allowed you go at your own pace until you felt ready. but it got to a point, a point where he started to doubt himself and to a point where you could read it.
“i…i cant.”
its not like you didnt love him, you loved him more than anything, more than yourself
and thats what scared you
you know the saying “you cant love someone until you love yourself”?
bullshit.
he was the reason you forgot you hated yourself because you were so inlove with him
and your pride was the one thing holding you back from facing the fear
“what?” seungcheol said pulling you out of your thoughts
you looked back at him to see his eyebrows furrowed
“you cant say you love me or you cant love me?” his tone became a bit more furrious
you didnt say anything, just stood there which was the first mistake you realized you made throughout this relationship out of the many
“im willing to wait for you yn, because i love you. i love you so much, i never want to rush you to tell me you love me back but its been almost months now. im starting to doubt myself”
you didnt know how to process his words, not knowing how to comfort him you did what you did best
leave.
“this is too much for me” thats all you managed to get out before you left the house without looking back
you heard his protest as you left but they went ignored, like how seungcheol felt in your relationship
-
seungcheol stood there watching the door close. he never understood how people could be so shocked they freeze but now that he was experiencing it first hand he didnt know what to do
should he run after you?
leave you alone?
was this the end between you two?
this couldnt be, you wouldnt let a small argument get between you two
right?
-
the first time reaching out.
seungcheol had reached out to you, it was about a week since you left the house without deciding if you two were actually over
he spent each day opening the message app and clicking on your contact name hoping he’ll see the 3 bubbles letting him know you were still thinking of him
so when he was finally fed up with it he sent you a message hoping itll give you a change of heart, he wanted you to know he didnt mean any of the bad things he said and that he still cares for you
“hi, i hope this finds you well but uhm i just wanted to know where we stand. im sorry if i overwhelmed you the last time we saw each other but i really want us to work out, you mean a lot to me and i love you, so much. but i cant keep hanging onto this silence from you. text me back when you can? i love you, and im sorry”
read
you had woken up from your pity nap to his message and spent the entire following week fighting the thoughts in your head
if you replied and told him you wanted to come back, youd still be in doubt about yourself and cause more trouble for the both lf you guys, but if you replied and told him you didnt want to get back together, itll cause a very strange and awkward tension between you two so just ignored the message and left him wondering
now that you think about it, it was a horrible idea but you didn’t know how to solve this. you didnt want to bring more pain to him but you couldnt bring pain to yourself either
so you stared at the message he sent a month later
“i waited for a month and im assuming we’re over? it sucks but i respect your decision. i hope you find someone for you, thank you for the memories we’ve had you’ve been good to me. i love you and im sorry for not being enough”
read
laying on your bed wrapped in a blanket resting on your side the tears fell on your phone. you didnt want him to think he wasnt enough when it was the opposite way around, but its too late now. all you could do was hope he found peace
-
seungcheol sat on the couch and sighed resting against it as he opened up the message only to see read for the nth time. was it really over between you two? is he never gonna be able to wake up to your face again?
maybe thats the way life goes
he just pushed his luck a little too much
-
the second time reaching out
its been a couple months, you kept his last messages in your ‘recent messages’ on your texting app. so each time you opened to text someone you still saw his contacy name with the words “i waited over a month….” underneath. youd be lying if you said it didnt hurt but it did, it stung that you let go of one of the best people in your life
so out of impulse, instead of texting your bestfriend a reply to her latest message you clicked on his name
“cheol 🩶”
“this is really sudden but i cant help but still feel guilty. i shouldve been better and replied to you but i was really scared. i was scared of hurting you and myself but im sorry, im sorry for not reaching out sooner, im
sorry for being a dick, im sorry for not being a good partner. i hope youre doing good and i wish you the best”
you held your breath as you sent it. it took you about a hour constantly rephrasing the words. you didnt want it to sound too lengthy or too short. you wanted to sound sincere but not that you longed for him even though you did.
took him exactly 3 hours and 19 minutes from when you sent the message to reply. you waited 22 minutes to open it, you kept refreshing the screen because his reply only had 12 words.
12
words
“no problem, i wish you the best, you were a good partner :)”
the smiley face really topped it off you could see how he was trying to downplay the situation to have you feel not as guilty , but you were ready for anything
to be blocked, to get yelled at over text, for him to be disappointed but this really twisted the knife
he was so civil about it, he wasnt angry, he wasnt stressed about it
so why were you?
maybe it was the fact you were the asshole while he was the victim. the victim who stood by you and tried to understand you only to be hurt. deciding not to push it you left his message on read and turned off your phone and sighed
-
when seungcheol got home from hanging out with jeonghan, he turned on his phone after not checking it to see your contact name as one of the first notifications. he said rubbed his eyes frantically and turned off and on his phone again to make sure he wasnt seeing things
clicking on the notification his heart clenched
he hoped you meant everything you said, but its kinda hard to believe when all he could see were words. he’d much rather hear it from you but he doubted his luck at this point.
sending a small reply of what hes able to get out now he hoped youll rack up the courage for you to see him, or maybe he will
-
the third time reaching out
the third time you reached out wasnt your proudest moment. your friend convinced you to finally go out after mopping about seungcheol for the last months. the main point she gave was
“you already apologized, he forgave, what are you waiting for now?”
she was right, he clearly showed no sign of wanting to get back together so you have to live your life without him whether you liked it or not
and it didnt turn out too well. all you could remember was drinking your face off and then opening your eyes in your bed, still in your outfit. assuming your friend brought you home you picked up your phone and unlocked it to immediately see your text log with seungcheol making your heart drop
there were 3 messages in total since your last apology
“chwol i msiss hou so mwuch came beck i love you se mych”
you saw he read it immediately but took 19 minutes to reply
“yn your drunk, get some rest. stay safe”
“im nat i love you, im sorry”
seungcheol left you on seen.
somehow to your and his suprise the only word you could spell right was ‘i love you’
especially seungcheol. the whole day he subconsciously kept going back to look at the message to see if youd come back and apologize or even try and clear things up but the most important thing to him was the “i love you”
did you mean it?
when he first saw the message on his phone at 2:22 from you saying “i love you” his heart stopped, well until he read the rest of the message, it was clear you were drunk but he hated how it still had an effect on him
drunk words were sober thoughts but still, he wished to hear those 3 words from you when you were intoxicated.
seungcheol still longed for you to tell him you love him even after these months but his expectations for you were low. as much as he’d hate to say it, he began to give up on the chance you’d love him again
but he still loved you.
-
the fourth time reaching out (sorta)
its been a year and a half since you both had ended things. admittedly you realized your issues and worked on yourself, you weren’t ashamed to admit that you were a horrible person before cause you were. but now you can at least be proud with the person youve became
you took time away from those associated with seungcheol to avoid seeing him and breaking down your healing process but now you were finally ready to face everyone and most importantly
apologize to seungcheol in person
walking inside hoshi’s party the music was blasting, everyone was talking to one another and you walked around looking for some familiar faces.
jeonghan was the first to greet you, he hugged you while mumbling questions asking of how youve been and what youve been up to. but as he hugged you he turned your body to face seungcheol.
you looked up and saw his eyes. he stared at you as if he never saw you before and froze once again
the same way he did when you left
jeonghan whispered a “go talk to him” before leaving.
as cliche as it sounded, in a room full of people you both stared at eachother blanky
he wss the first to smile slight at you and you took that as a go sign to walk to him
as you made you way to him time moved slow, it seemed like everyone wasnt there anymore, just you and him
and like time went back to normal youre now standing infront of him
“seung-“
“cheol!”
you heard another voice call him by his nickname
looking for the voice you found it belonged to another woman.
it was hard to not assume the worst especially when you looked up and saw his embarrassed face.
“i love you….im sorry”
those two words were all you said before you left
again.
but this time you walked away with not the regret of being afraid but instead regretting the fact you let him
go to be with someone else
with tied in with how much you hated yourself for being so selfish you couldnt or rather didnt want to imagine him with anyone other than you
but there was no one to blame but you
walking back to your car you sat in the driver seat and laid on the horn while screaming letting out every single feeling youve felt and held in despite thinking youve let go
i guess somethings never leave
your love for him.
“excuse me?” you looked up at the old lady
you rolled down the window and tilted your head
“your horn” she awkwardly laughed
“oh right. sorry.” you chuckled awkwardly as she left, you reclined your seat back wanting to disappear
-
the fifth time reaching out
seungcheol spent the entire night and day after the party consoling himself. he tried to convince himself that you already moved on so what happened last night didnt mean much.
you werent worried were you?
she was just his cousin but you wouldnt be jealous or bothered because you had moved on
moved on
moved on
moved
oh fuck it. he hoped you didnt.
but he had spent the entire year and a half, almost 2 years afraid to go for what he wants. but life was too short
life was too short to hold him to get you back
whether it ends with him getting slapped or completely heart broken
its okay with him
so as he opens his door with his shoss on he-
you.
you looked as almost shocked as him as he opened the door
you both jumbled your words
“i-“
“well-“
“but-“
“hi.”
you both said
there was a moment of silence of you two deciding what to do, or who should speak first
you shook your head and decided to go first
“i love you
im sorry.”
he froze, the words he longed to hear from you finally hit his ears. there was no ‘and’ between the ‘i love you’ and ‘im sorry’. its as if you were apologizing for loving him like you were scared
and he knew you were. so hearing it made it 10 times better
the silence from him caused you to be able to hear your heartbeat, you looked up and seen him smiling warmly as he opened his arms
your lips curved up slightly as you entered his embrace
“i love you
i havent stopped”
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moonriseoverkyoto · 5 months ago
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Ghosts in the family
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Synopsis - aka all the times The Riley siblings have talked about eachother, and all the times Soap should’ve connected the dots but didn’t see the constellation.
cw/tags - MDNI 18+ making out, grinding, no piv or smut guys sorry, swearing, mentions of female anatomy, military inaccuracies, fanon versions of cod characters, threats, mild violence, mentions of guns, innuendos, etc. you’re dealing with grown men in the military that is your warning
Pairing - Johnny “Soap” MacTavish x Afab!Riley!Reader, John Price x Riley!Reader (Platonic)
Author's note - Soap is about 26, Reader is 24, Tommy is the name of Simon’s canon younger brother who later scares him with masks and anyways, just beware of that background. Pt.2 of this au, just this just shits and giggles background for later bc I dont know how to flesh out that cliffhanger I left in my Drabble, see you at the bottom! - Moon
Requests are open!
© moonriseoverkyoto 2023. please do not steal, copy, plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my works without my permission. do not steal any elements of my theme without permission.
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1. Simon knew that Johnny’s intention wasn’t to piss him off, but yet he still managed to feel a migraine pool behind his eyes. All day, every mission just asking question after question. Simon wondered if this is what it was like to have a stable home. All he had was you from day one his baby sister. His lips jerk upward before he cuts off the muscle reflex of what we know as a smile. He’d rather keel over and die than let Johnny see his eyes krinkle.
“I have a sister.” He grumbles. Everyone in the truck goes silent. Johnny’s jokes stop, Gaz smirks to himself, even Price manages to watch through the rearview mirror.
“Really? And you waited so long to tell me. Oh my god what’s the like. Oh is she pretty- wait don’t answer that, that’s weird if you agree…” Simon sighs to himself as he tunes out Johnny again. Oh he wishes holiday would come faster.
2. Holiday was tough. Even worse was being stuck alone over holiday break because your only family was stuck in an operation. Especially since you just got the news after putting up Christmas decoration.
“Really Simon? I got football on the telly, your presents are all wrapped” you whined. Simon grinned under his balaclava, oh how he wished he could be there to receive your annual gag gift.
“I know I know I know, assignment came late and everyone else has families to go home to so I just suggested myself-“ he tried to calm you down knowing this would only add gasoline.
“Dammit Si, I’m your family too! Im gonna give you a new buzz cut when you get home at the rate you’re going with all these sudden plans.” Your voice cracked at his name, you know he didn’t mean to break your heart. But Simon couldn’t bare to see Johnny, Price, or Gaz not go home to their big happy families.
“Yeah I know. Im yer brother. No getting out of that one.” He said. “Why don’t you stay with Price again this year. You know he loves you around”
“Because he is the only friend of yours that I’ve met-“
“Yeah you’ll meet the guys someday. promise.”
“Maybe for this holiday present?”
“Maybe.“
“yeah yeah yeah. I love you Si”
“Love you too, and I hope that second date of yours goes well this Friday” oh if only he knew how well that date went with your mysterious Scottish man.
3. “I thought you said you don’t kiss on the second date” Johnny grinned into your lips. Your hands all in his hair.
“Only if they don’t show promise” you remarked back. You could feel his bulge grinding through your pants in the back of this telephone booth. A soft groan leaving his lips as Johnny responded
“Oh so I show promise.” You could practically hear the grin as his lips trailed down your jaw and neck, the slight friction of his scruff following as he moved aside your dogtags.
“Yeah promise that if you don’t hush up, you won’t be getting anything” you quipped back as equally as smug
“Thought you were gonna call that brother of yers” he slurred back as he smelled your perfume. The man practically drooling as your nails trailed down his neck scratching. If he had a tail it’d be whipping the air. A whimper passing through the air as his bulge caught the right part of your fabric rubbing your clit in a delightful direction
“he can wait, I have something else to call for now” you said as you opened the door of the telephone booth and whistled (or yelled if you can’t) as loud as you could do to call a taxi. Johnny had a light in his eye that he never thought would spark until he met you.
Soon you would find out later that Simon actually COULD wait and he did, 12 whole hours he stayed up staring at your apartment door to be let in - fresh on holiday too. Maybe being motormouth’d by Johnny into the window of a hummer didn’t sound so bad now
4. Simon kept a photo of you and him in his pocket everywhere that you went. I mean everywhere. No matter the place. And a lighter too incase he was captured by enemies so as to not compromise his location. But it was a photo from a holiday in France. You were both pillow fighting in the bed. Messy hair, toothless grins, back when Mummy was alive and Daddy hadn’t shown his true colors. Tommy took that picture,. Simon holds it to remind him what he’s fighting for.
“Oh is that yer little sister, she’s missin a few teeth there” Johnny grins looking over the sniper’s shoulder.
“You’re about to miss some bones if you ask about my sister again” Simon growls. fuck. Johnny is the last person he needs around his sister. It’s not like Johnny was a womanizer - he was the opposite. Johnny was perfection. He was from a happy home, a stable home, a place where you wouldn’t have to remember what happened at that old house. It scared Simon to death imagining you forgetting about him. Then he’d really be alone.
“She must’ve gotten the good genes.” Gaz pipes into the coms, what an instigator.
“Wonder what she looks like in jeans” Soap hummed as he cleaned out his gun.
Ghost hummed to himself as he secretly folded up the photo and put it right back in the pocket over his heart. Maybe you could wait another year before meeting them.
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Authors note - I made a part 2, this is unedited. Im so tired. I will flesh more of this out before I take another break I promise!! Xoxo - Moon
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cmncisspnandmore · 11 months ago
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One Night Stand; Part 6
Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley X Pregnant!Reader
Warnings: Smut, Shower smut, Slight breeding kink if you squint, Simon Riley being a literal angel, basically all smut with a little bit of plot.
A/N: Hi loves, imma be real, i wrote this entire part in a day. I spent pretty much my entire afternoon writing this after i scrapped about 4 different versions. This is the best i got at the moment. Im still working on this series and requests. Just life is kinda busy. So please bear with me and enjoy the brain rot. This is also not proofread at all so RIP to any grammar police.
Word Count: 3012... This seemed longer.. sowwie, its smol.
New to the Series? Catch up here: Part 5
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You sleepily make your way towards the bathroom door, hand closing over the knob as the incessant need to pee urges you forward. It was a little after 2am, you had fallen asleep rather early having spent most of the day lounging around the apartment. 
Simon was on base for the day, running training exercises with Soap, Gaz and Captain Price. During the 3 months you have been living with Simon, you have come to learn his patterns. Training days meant that 9 times out of 10 he would spend the night on base. The days before a deployment he would make sure to stock the fridge and pantry with your favorites. On Sundays he did laundry, every 3rd wednesday he would get his haircut. Saturdays after returning for deployment were reserved for going out to Soap’s bar and having a well deserved drink. You also learnt his day to day routine, every morning he was home Simon rose at exactly 5:00am, went on a 12 mile run, when he returned if you weren't already awake he would prepare you a healthy breakfast and leave it out for you before heading to work. 
On days when you were awake when he got back from his run he would shower, and you both would spend some time preparing breakfast together. Although those mornings instead of the nutritionally packed meals he usually prepared you often convinced him to make some sort of carb and sugar filled breakfast. Those mornings he would often leave the flat grumbling about how he should’ve run extra. Those mornings were your favorite. 
Since you moved in your relationship with Simon had not progressed further than friends, sure there was still the burning desire that he ignited within you from just looking at you. And you would often linger just a little bit too long in his arms when he would give you a hug. But there hadn't been any kissing, and you haven't managed to end up naked in between his sheets. But that wasn't for lack of wanting.
As you shove open the bathroom door, you fail to realize that not only was the light on but the sound of running water was coming from the shower. As you quickly beeline for the enclosed toilet space, you don't feel a set of brown eyes watching your every move from behind the foggy glass. It isn't until you wash your hands in the sink and glance up into the large mirror on the wall that you realize you aren't alone. Through the fogged glass of the mirror you can make out Simon’s large silhouette, his tanned skin reduced to nothing more than a tan blob. 
“Oh my god!” You squeak, whirling around, your chest heaving as you finally face Simon. He's mostly obscured by the fogged glass door of the walk-in shower, but his bemused smile is clear. “I didn't think you would be coming home!” You mutter out, your cheeks turning pink as he runs his hand across the glass cleaning away some of the fog. Now you can clearly see his face, although distorted by the water droplets on the glass. 
“I should’ve texted you, I'm sorry.. I just didn't want to be late for the appointment in the morning..” Simon says as he reaches up, running his hand through his wet blonde hair.
“No, no! I'm sorry, I should've paid more attention. I'm such an airhead sometimes I didn't realize that there was someone in here..” you rush out as you try to desperately keep your eyes from straying from Simon's face. You aren’t sure if it's the heat from the shower or the pregnancy hormones but it takes all your willpower to keep your eyes from trailing down his toned body. 
Simon pauses for a moment, his dark brown eyes trailing over you, from the adorable flush of your cheeks to the swell of your stomach under the sleep shirt you have on. “It’s alright. Love," Simon smiles. One of his panty dropping smiles that you swear he reserves for only you. It's the smile that sends shivers straight to your core. That leaves you a hot panting mess behind closed doors. Living with Simon and not jumping his bones at every opportunity was damn near torture during your second trimester. You were able to take care of things yourself, but now that your bump had grown substantially, you hadn’t been able to find relief.  
Without thinking, you walk towards the shower and yank open the door, the hot steam pouring out. Little splashes of water hit your skin as you step into the small space. Your sleep shirt and shorts quickly drenched, as Simon stares at you wide eyed. 
“Sweetheart…” Simon warns as your hands come to rest on his wet cheeks, your thumb catching on his bottom lip as he looks down at you, his pupils blown wide. You quickly close the space between you two, your bump pressing against the firm plains of his abs, your arms snaking around his neck as you sharply tug him down to your height. Your lips capture his in a sloppy, wet kiss. Simon groans low in his throat, his chest vibrating against your overly sensitive breasts. A new wave of need pluses through you as you try to get closer, Simon's cock jumping to life as it presses against your lower stomach. Simon's large hands land on your hips squeezing slightly as he turns you, pressing your back against the cold tile wall of the shower. 
A startled gasp rushes past your lips as your back makes contact with the cold tile. A shiver running through you as your wet shirt makes it feel colder. Simon smiles against your lips, one hand coming up to graze over your pebbled nipples through the sopping wet fabric of your shirt. A breathy moan slips from you as Simon peppers kisses down the side of your jaw to your neck. The spray from the showerhead now sprays off his shoulders as he leans lower. 
“Fuck.. Please,” you whine, nails scratching along the tops of his shoulders Simon wraps his lips around one of your nipples, over the fabric of your shirt. The friction from the wet fabric sends waves of pleasure through you straight to your core, your legs starting to shake with need and Simon has barely touched you.
“Such a needy girl…” Simon murmurs against your skin, as he flicks his tongue across your nipple. Your cheeks flush pink at his words but you’re hanging on to each one like they’re your life line. “Why didn't you just come to me if you needed some help baby?” Simon whispers softly, as his fingers trace the bottom of your bump, slipping beneath the fabric of your shirt as he pushes it up.
“I…I don't know,” You mumble your head tipping back against the cold shower wall. 
Simon hums, his lips once again brushing across one of your nipples, pulling another moan from you. “God, your tits are amazing. It’s been hell walking around trying not to stare at them. Knowing that my child is the reason, knowing that they are growing to provide milk for our baby,” Simon whispers against your skin, and you swear you could cum just from the sounds of his voice. 
“Simon… Please…” you whine, it's small and breathy, in any other circumstance you would be ashamed for sounding so weak, but right now you couldn't give two shits if the damn queen of England was standing here witnessing your plea.
“Tell me what you need baby, I don't want to hurt you..” Simon stands back to his full height, his hand coming to cup the side of your face. You force your eyes open, Simon's beautiful brown eyes staring at you. Simon is a large man, in all aspects of his life and the last thing he would ever want to do is hurt you unintentionally. Especially now, as you carry his child within you, he would rather be buried alive again than accidentally do something to hurt you or the baby.
“I need you to bend me over and fuck me senseless. I feel like I'm going to explode,” you whine, your needy hands coming to rake down his bare chest, sending a shiver through Simon's entire body. 
“Whatever you need, Love,” Simon grunts before he bends down and picks you up, nudging open the shower door with his shoulder as he cradles you against his wet chest. He doesn’t stop to turn off the shower or even dry himself off as he brings you into his room. He sets you down on your feet and quickly drops to his knees in front of you. His still warm hands catching the waistband of your wet sleep shorts. He pulls them down your legs, goosebumps erupting across your skin from the sudden change in temperature. 
Simon presses a series of soft kisses to the stretched skin of your stomach, his hands briefly cupping your belly/ “Hi Lovie,” he whispers softly to your bump and if you weren’t so ravishingly horny you could cry. The sight of probably one of the scariest men you know on his knees in front of you talking to his unborn child makes you want to scream in the best way. But your mind quickly goes blank as Simon's fingers trace the smooth skin of your inner thigh. 
“Turn around, elbows on the bed, pet,” Simon stands again, his hands on your shoulders as he gently turns you. As if on autopilot you lean forwards, resting your elbows on the bed, giving Simon a perfect view of your ass. A deep groan hits your ears as Simon's hand comes to massage the puffy flesh of your ass. Your skin prickles with anticipation as his fingers dip lower, gathering the slick wetness from between your thighs. The breath wooshed from your lungs as he thrusts one finger into your slick cunt. 
“You’re so wet for me, such a good girl aren't you?” Simon hums, lazily thrusting his finger before he adds a second. You tip your hips back, trying to make him go faster, this slow languid pace he was setting was driving you mad. You needed to be fucked, and god damn if you didn't get it right now you were going to cry. 
“Si…” you whine, pushing your hips back into his hand as he curls his fingers within you. 
“Hmm?”
“I’m pregnant, not made of fucking glass. I swear if you don't fu-” Your voice cuts off as Simon slams into you in one quick thrust. Your world spins for a moment and if you hadn't been holding onto the bed for support you would’ve fallen over. A startled gasp passes your lips and Simon all but freezes. “No please don't stop, it just feels different but not in a bad way…” You quickly mumble reaching back haphazardly with one hand to try and grab Simon's hip to force him to move.  
“You sure?” Simon mumbles, his hands coming to rest on your hips, as he slowly pulls out before sinking back in. 
“Oh god, yes, please,” you moan, your face now pressed into the mattress. That was all it took for Simon to continue, his hips thrust into you at a rapid pace, obscene moans leaving your lips as he slams home each time. Sex felt different this time, there was no slight burn from how big Simon was but you felt full, so deliciously full. You had been worried about having sex at any point during your pregnancy, having read that some women have no sex drive during pregnancy, especially the 3rd trimester. But thank the lord above it was not the case for you. Your thoughts turn to nothing as Simon lets out a harsh moan, your walls fluttering around him. 
“Fuck baby, you’re squeezing me so tight,” Simon grunts as he adjusts his grip on your hip bones,his fingertips digging into your skin.
“Feels so good Simon.. I'm gonna cum..” You whimper as the familiar coil in your stomach tightens, teetering on the edge of release as he pounds into you. Your skin slapping against each other so loud you're sure the neighbors know what's going on.
“Cum for me baby,” Simon leans forward, one hand wrapping around your shoulder as he pulls you up slightly, your elbows no longer resting on the bed as he pulls you up against his chest. His hips still pistoning into you as he uses the new position to fuck into your harder. You reach up and grab the back of his neck with your hand, anchoring yourself to him, your other hand coming to find the hand still on your waistline. You guide his hand up to your throat where he gives it a gentle squeeze. 
That small squeeze was all you needed to go tumbling over the edge into oblivion. Stars dance in front of your vision as the world goes quiet for a moment. Simon finds his own release moments after yours, his entire body tensing behind you. As you turn to putty in his arms, “Woah, I’ve got you,” Simon whispers into your sweaty hairline as his arms carefully wrap around you and he manages to slip out of you and hold you up. 
“Sorry,” you mumble, fully sated as you lean against his chest. You can feel his heart hammering against your back, one arm firmly around you, right under your breasts the other resting lightly on your bump. His fingers softly rubbing along your soft skin. 
“You have nothing to apologize for,” Simon grunts, maneuvering you to the edge of the bed where he helps lower you into it. 
“I just basically jumped you in the shower… “ you mutter, your eyes heavy as exhaustion hits you like a freight train hitting a brick wall. 
Simon pauses as he gathers your wet pj’s from the floor and shoves them into his laundry basket. “You think I would be upset by you jumping me in the shower?” He asks, a small smile on his face. 
You lift your head, watching as he shoves the clothes into the basket and grabs a black long sleeve shirt from the closet. He walks over, standing in front of you still in all his naked glory, the shirt in his hands. “Well.. I mean.. we haven’t exactly expressed wanting more than friendship..” 
“Love, I’ve been taking it slow because I thought you only wanted to be friends… not because I wanted to. God, watching you walk around the apartment, your stomach growing with my child drives me insane, I’ve wanted to bend you over the kitchen counter and fuck you sensless every morning since the first day you got here.” Simon pulls the shirt over your head, and you put your arms through, the shirt still fits loosely even over your baby bump. 
“Oh…” you freeze for a moment, you and Simon had gotten closer over the time you’ve lived with him. You had learnt about his past, about his mother and brother. About his nephew. You held him when he cried one night, his words a broken mess of how he was afraid he would turn out to be his dad. How he wished he could talk to his brother one last time, so he could ask him how he got past the fear of turning into his dad. How he handled the fear of being a dad when he had Joseph.
But the entire time you had lived together Simon had always treated you with respect, he never touched your stomach without asking. He always made sure to keep a respectable distance from you when you were on the couch. He never entered your room without permission and never asked about your life before coming to London. 
But it wasn’t to say you didn’t share things with Simon, he knew your favorite color, your worst fear (unrelated to your family’s passing) , your greatest wish, he knew what you used to dream about being as a little kid. He knew that your favorite food could make you smile on your worst days, and that you liked to watch old sitcoms when it rained. If someone was to look into your conversations they would probably think you were already together. That you probably didn’t flaunt the physical aspects of your relationship. Simon had quickly broken down the walls you had put up around yourself, and had comfortably made his own spot in your heart.
Simon sits next to you, now dressed in a pair of black sweatpants, his large hand covering yours. You slowly look up at him, his brow furrowed as he studies your face. The small scar in his eyebrow evident this close, you reach out running a finger across it. The skin is slightly raised and water drips from his hair onto your finger.
“Then you should stop fighting the urge…” you finally whisper, your hand cupping the rough skin of Simon’s face. 
“Would you be okay with that? With me touching you whenever I wanted… holding you.. kissing you?” Simon whispers, his eyes closing for a moment as he leans into your hand.
You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, your forehead coming to rest against his, your eyes closed. For a moment you just sit there. Your foreheads pressed together, your breath mingling.
Could you be okay with that?
Could you let someone in that way?
Let someone get close enough that they could see all the broken and jagged edges of you?
Could you open yourself up to losing someone again?
The thought of Simon being gone suddenly, ripped away from you by some unknown, the same person who ripped your siblings and mother away from you makes you want to vomit.
But a small part of you chimes in, the part that knows Simon isn’t defenseless like your family was. Simon was a trained military man, a man who single handedly killed an entire crew for crossing him. He could handle himself. He had proved that time and time again in the field. He also had the rest of 141, the team who would go to the ends of the earth to find him. 
You open your eyes, and look at Simon, the answer on the tip of your tongue as you stare at his beautiful face. His light blonde stubble, the small scars, the crook in his nose, the slightly uneven line of his lower lip. “Yes… I-I want that.. I want all of it.”
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Next Part: 7
Taglist: @coffeeandtealol, @natashamea18
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squoxle · 2 months ago
Note
hey…im new to ur page and i was just wondering if u write cnc and if u do can u make make one for riize
(any member is fine with me :P)
[2] MATCH MY FREAK ~ riize ot7
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I mixed two themes together lol...their kinks and how they want to use you
DISCLAIMER: this is just for fun, so if it doesn't fit you, don't take it personal :)
word count: not long enough to matter :/
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♡ Now Playing: Nasty - Tinashe ♡ 00:24 ━━●────── 02:59 ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮
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☯︎ Shotaro | Bondage ☯︎
I can see Shotaro getting turned on by seeing you all tied up and waiting for him to rip you apart. Just looking so pathetic, helpless, and submissive is his favorite way to see you. Not only does he enjoy the step of binding your hands and feet, but he also loves to see you squirm beneath him.
☯︎ Sungchan | Asphixiation ☯︎
If you haven't seen this man's arms you need to go look them up right now. I know he would love fucking you in a chokehold. Just watching you fall in and out of consciousness is enough to keep him going for hours. Don't worry, he'll make sure to baby you like his dizzy little doll after he's done fucking the life out of you.
☯︎ Eunseok | Impact Play ☯︎
Whether he's smacking your ass while you ride or he's squeezing your face together and smacking the side of your face. He's careful not to hurt you too much...unless you ask for it of course. Eunseok loves to see his handprint blushed bright red across your ass, and hearing your little whimpers sends chills up his spine.
☯︎ Wonbin | Praise + Degrading ☯︎
Wonbin loves to call you his good little slut while he fucks you. The mix of praise and degrading names with the sound of your skin slapping against each other sends your body into a sensory overdrive. He loves to see your pouty face as he claims you as his cum dump, taking him like the perfect slut you are.
☯︎ Seunghan | Gagging + Size Kink ☯︎
You might as well get used to being Seunghan's throat goat. Sure he loves doing other things with you, but nothing beats watching your eyes roll back as he shoves himself seven inches down your throat. Hearing you gag and moan all over him is like music to his ears, and filling your mouth with his hot load is even better.
☯︎ Anton | Exhibition ☯︎
Oh, Anton. Can't you just hear his sweet voice whispering in your ear as he fucks you senseless? I can see him gently guiding you into positions and pleasing you all while his camera catches every second. He loves to go back and watch videos the two of you make together. Hearing your moans, watching you cum...he loves it all.
☯︎ Sohee | Food Play ☯︎
When it comes down to sex, I can see Sohee keeping things pretty playful. Trust me, he still wants to get off, but what's wrong with making you laugh before you cum? He's definitely a switch once things get going. He'll want you to take control and surprise him, but he also wants to dominate you when he's about to finish.
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author's note: I'll work on uploading full versions for each fic depending on the outcome of this poll lol
𝒦𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓉𝑜𝒷𝑒𝓇 𝑀𝒶𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓁𝒾𝓈𝓉
❀ Thank you all so much for reading! Make sure to check out other works on my masterlist!
@wildflowermooon
@heeseungshim
@ramyeonzprincess
@bangchans-gf5
@wand3rlustm3
@heeseunghee7
@norihoyeon
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illuminatedmoth · 2 months ago
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starfield still blows btw
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blkkizzat · 2 months ago
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OH MY GAWDDD GIRL UR NEW THEME IS AMAZING!!!
fic authors self rec! :3 when you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. let's spread the self-love ♡⊹
REMMIIII MAMA HEYYY!!! TYSM QUEEN! I hope you been well! <33
oooh ok!
this was low key kinda hard, these are in no order btw:
The Nursery - yakuza x toji reader (ok i lied this might be my fav and im not even done yet, ive spent over a year thinking about this fic. this is peak version of toji for me).
Come Put That Million $$$ Pussy On Me Make Me Rich farmhand!toji x brat reader (i keep thinking of this!! i wanna write more based on what me and 🧠 nonny thought of but i have too many series unfinished rn).
Sins of The Father - priest nanami x reader (totally different writing style here for me and my like 6 years of Catholic school is definitely showing).
My Shawty Always On Some Bullshit Like Chicago - plug!choso x brat!reader (the way before this fic i thought i legit couldn't write angst and was more of a crack/comedy writer. then y'all were bringing out pitchforks for reader LOL and i was like "oh" i guess this is angst kdfjhadskfjasdk)
A Bumpy Ride - geto x reader (thanks for also thinking im funny y'all haha. i love a good crack fic. wild how many interactions it has).
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the-sinful-voice-witch · 2 months ago
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Ok, I'm losing my head right now. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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The multiversus crossover game brought to us not only the Powerpuff girls... But THE ROWDYRUFF BOYS AS WELL!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
But... Oh girl... Omg... There's even more for me to even lose my head harder 🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃
LOOK AT THIS!!! 👇👇👇
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It says Powerpuff girls but is actually one of the rowdyruff boys talking... IS BOOMER!!!! To think a simple videogame line is enough to make go crazy delulu like this... Here comes the delulu twisted romantic mental gymnastics 😍😍😍
So i need an explanation. No really i need one. Why is Boomer saying that? Bubbles didn't see what? WHAT YOU DON'T WANT HER TO SEE?? Multiversus you can't leave me like this!! Did he say that because he was clumsy and doesn't want to look lame in front of her? Did he say that because he was doing something bad and doesn't want to look that bad in front of her? Sorry im just going back when they got their second appearance in the show and Bubbles said: I WANT THE BLONDE, I THINK HE IS CUTE!.... IM DYING OVER HERE I NEED ANSWERS!!!! 😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫
Update!! The 3 of them say more shippable stuff KYAAAAAAAAA omg omg omg GO WATCH A VIDEO WITH ALL THE RRB MULTIVERSUS VOICE LINES... IM SCREAMING 😭😭😭😭😭
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Im going DELULU!!
also since now they became mainstream thanks to this crossover game i should remind people of other old crossovers as well that are still ongoing and need more love:
FUSIONFALL
The original fusionfall retro and legacy were cancelled i think but i think you can still play the retro. But currently i saw that there's people working on a new version that was going to be renamed: Saturday morning: invasion.
Anyway look at this images from Fusionfall legacies 👇😖
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Boomer will be included in Saturday morning invasion too with a different look... So i hope the project succeeds!!🤞🤞🤞
PPGD: POWERPUFF GIRLS THE DOUJINSHI
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This is a Halloween special from the webcomic that is still ongoing in snafu-comics.
Needles to say i fell into the deep pit of shipping hard madness after seeing this 😂😂😂 even though i don't need this much, i can go delulu and make up a reason to ship characters out of every insignificant detail, hence the fuss i made over: " I hope Bubbles didn't see that", yeah my blue boy is totally in love 🤪🤪🤪
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