#and if he was REALLY that devoted he'd stay with her to begin with

[kitramune]

Romantic things Inuyasha has said to Kikyou: You were the first woman I loved. Romantic things Inuyasha has said to Kagome: I met Kagome and regained my lost heart. Kagome is my home. I want you by my side, Kagome. There's no replacement for you. Trust me a little more (to be loyal to you). Your heart is strong and beautiful. Kagome is the reason I can smile, cry for others, and have friends. We were born for each other.

[forgetmaenott]

Experimentation - SHOWTIME

SUMMARY: Pomni isn't sure if Caine knows what he feels towards her, so she experiments a little bit. She's just curious. Nothing else. Nothing at all.

a/n: Title is also a double meaning for me, as this fic was written more so as practice for the sillies more than anything else. So apologies If it's a bit all over the place. I wasn't going to upload but Showtime fans are deprived of content so I will give you what you need 🙏

Pomni was far from oblivious to the things that Caine did to impress her.

Initially, it had been small attempts at making her happy--no doubt as a result of her first few adventures being particularly unpleasant. Caine didn't seem to understand most things about human responses, but it was of Pomni's understanding that it was in his programming to make everyone happy. And Pomni, from day one, had made it exceedingly clear just how unhappy she was. If anything, she was a challenge to Caine's coding, just begging to be fixed. Why wouldn't he put in a slight more effort for one of his superstars?

With time, though, his check-ins and side quests for her grew into...something else. Lingering touches on her hand or shoulder, seeking opportunities to show her, and only her, a preview of an upcoming adventure. Sometimes she caught his lingering gazes, his artificial eyes searching for validation of his work, and it made her wish to shrink away. He'd move his thumb lightly across her hand experimentally, sending a rush of nerves through Pomni's system. Or he'd fly around excitedly--often at the expense of Pomni's stomach--to show her something new he had coded into the circus. Or he'd show up in her room under the guise of a check-in, only to stay and talk with her for nearly an hour. He hung onto her every word, and Pomni had to admit to herself, she rather enjoyed his presence in those times. Getting to explain bits of her real life memories to his fascinated gaze; as she regained the pieces of what real life had been like, he was just beginning to understand it.

Just a day ago, she had found herself mindlessly recounting vague details of reality that she had once adored--the flickering of stars in a quiet night, the humming of crickets, the feeling of a slight breeze, the slight running of water nearby. She didn't know where that memory originated from, but she could still feel it. It was strange, not remembering facts but remembering feelings.

And now, she found herself recounting these thoughts as she waited for Caine on a "special adventure", staring at the way the digital stars twinkled in the night sky, and how her wisps of hair gently brushed across her face in the breeze.

His favoritism wasn't subtle, but Pomni had always tried to deny it to her friends. But now, standing here and seeing the ripples on the digital lake, she couldn't help but wonder. Was it really so bad? Wasn't it almost endearing that Caine had found himself so enamored with her? That he was falli--

"Good evening, my dear!"

Pomni stiffened at the sound of her ringmaster's enthusiastic voice, jumping out of her thoughts and flushing at the realization of what she had been considering. "AGH--Caine! How many times have I told you--"

"Ah, apologies, my dear. I just can't help but be over-the-moon about your private adventure!" Caine winked at his not-so-subtle play on words, zipping around excitedly above her.

Pomni rubbed her head. "Uh...okay...that's great," she said quietly.

"Isn't it?? I stayed up ALL night working on this just for you! Not that I need to sleep, of course," he chuckled before lowering to her level, carefully grabbing her hand in both of his, "But I did it! Just for you, dear."

"Just for me?" she repeated mindlessly. Her mind screamed the same words: AI, Program, NOT REAL, but she couldn't help but gaze again at the flickering stars and wonder--

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

"O-oh." There it was. His favoritism showing itself once again, his devotion to her and her alone. He brushed his thumb over her knuckles, gazing down at her hand as though he wished to memorize each detail. This was crazy. She couldn't let him be so foolish as to be interested in her, she couldn't let this go any further. "Caine--"

"Ah, ah, ah! This adventure is about you. I have SO much to show you!" His gentleness faded instantaneously from the excitement, the pressure on her hands growing tighter as he pulled her in. Before she could even process the closeness or the fluster, he grabbed her waist and graciously flew her above the lake. He set her down on a digital cloud, which she was able to step on as though it were a solid surface. She avoided looking down, tensing as she looked around her. "As your ringmaster, it is my sole purpose to make YOU and all of your co-stars happy," he exclaimed, pointing an exaggerated finger at her, "and I couldn't help but notice how your mannerisms changed when you told me about your world. My dear...I cannot return you to your world. But perhaps, I can bring your world here."

Pomni's heart skipped a beat at the gesture, which she tried to ignore. This wasn't the same Caine from her bad dreams when she'd first arrived. This was...different. Entirely different. "For...all of us?" she asked slowly.

His demeanor broke for a moment. "Ah--yes, yes. Of course! My role is to assure everyone at the circus is happy," He paused in thought for a moment before he flew down by her side and cautiously approached her, "but admittedly, you've been quite the challenge for me since you've arrived here. You're a bit stubborn, you know."

"Is that a bad thing?" Pomni cracked a smile.

"Not exactly, dear. It's one of my favorite traits of yours. It's what keeps me coming back to you," Caine said with what she assumed was a smile.

Pomni felt a light blush dust her pale face. "I don't think you know what you're saying."

Caine titled his head curiously at her. "Why is that?"

Pomni blinked. He really didn't know what he was saying, did he? Did he even know what he was feeling? Could he even feel anything?

She glanced sidelong at the flickering stars, the lake below her, the way the clouds swirled up and floated around them--enough to give her the courage to test the waters. Before she could listen to the voices in her mind screaming at her, she grabbed his gloved hand in hers. "So...you like that I'm a challenge to your purpose? Or is it something else?" she asked experimentally, hoping the quiver in her voice wasn't too obvious.

Caine's eyes widened at the sudden contact, too afraid to move his hand an inch at the risk that she would let go. Not that Pomni could see his reaction, as she was too busy looking at her red and blue shoes to avoid meeting his gaze with her flushed one. "Something...else? What would that be?"

She lightly traced her index finger along the edge of his hand. Oh, God. She didn't even know what she was doing. How does she even answer a question like that to an AI? "Well...what do you, uh, feel?" She sealed the gap between their fingers, interlacing them together carefully.

If Caine could breathe, his breath would have easily caught in his non-existent throat. "I feel that I want you to be happy."

"Because of your programming? Or...something else?" Pomni said before she could cringe at her own words. She was just asking because she was curious, that was all. She just wanted to know if he knew what romantic feelings even were, nothing more. Or so she told herself.

"Well, I want you to be happy all the time. Because of me. That is my purpose, isn't it?"

Pomni smiled half-heartedly. Intentional or not, he was making this extra difficult for her. "Yeah..." she agreed quietly, a strange pit settling in her stomach. Maybe he was just coded to be this way. Maybe she was just being extra difficult. Before she could think of anything else to say, the sudden sensation of his smooth teeth against her hand sent shockwaves up from her hand and into her digital heart. She stilled at the sensation, gaining the courage to meet his gaze as he lifted his teeth from her hand, a cartoonish flush appearing on his lower jaw.

"But, I do find myself feeling more...drawn to your happiness, dear," he admitted, looking to the side sheepishly. He brushed his thumb against her knuckles where he had left a kiss, causing Pomni to shiver. "My dear? Did I do something wrong?"

Pomni squeezed her pinwheel eues shut, tensing her shoulders. "No, no--Caine you--" she stuttered, "I..." God, what happened to her composure? She had never been like this around him before. But suddenly every movement against his hand sent chills across her body, every thing he'd done to make her happy felt significant, and--oh, God. She couldn't possibly be--

"Darling," Caine said, so quietly Pomni almost couldn't believe it was him. His hand trailed up to the curve of her chin, gazing at her so softly she felt dizzy, "you don't need to worry around me. You've taught me so much about your world, about how the human mind works. So dear...don't be afraid to teach me more."

Pomni couldn't tear her eyes away from his gaze, tongue tied by his intense adoration in his eyes. "What is it you want to know?" she asked quietly, her lips seeming to move before her mind could catch up.

"Anything you have to show me."

There was certianly no way he understood what he was implying.

And there was even less of a chance she was actively considering all the things she could show him. She blushed at the thought.

"Caine?"

"Yes, my dear?"

"I love this. All of this. Everything you've added to the grounds for me. It's sweet of you, and...it really feels a bit more like home. I-I just thought you'd want to know that it...you made me happy. Thank you."

Caine's eyes glistened cartoonishly, unable to tear his eyes from her. "Pomni," he sighed, saying her name for the first time all night somehow felt more intimate than any contact they'd had, "why is it that I feel this way?"

Pomni flushed. "What way?"

"I have made you happy, my very purpose as your ringmaster. But now, I don't want to stop making you happy. I..." he tightened his grip on her hand, "I've never been close like this to anyone before. Truly. Would it be so bold as to call you a friend?"

Pomni struggled to contain an incredulous laugh--he really didn't understand what he felt, did he? "I...think you're becoming a friend to me, as well," she admitted, staring down at their hands still clasped together. He had moved the hand on her face down to hold the top of her hand, gently rubbing circles against it. In the back of her mind, she still felt the imprint of his teeth against her hand, her heart speeding up at the thought. "Caine?"

"Mm?"

"Is it...well, um...would it be okay if...I taught you, one more thing?"

"Why Pomni, I'd love nothing more than that!"

Pomni smiled. "Okay, it's just..." she hesitated, allowing herself to get caught up in the way the stars twinkled around them before tracing her hands up to his chest, then his shoulder, then below his lower jaw. She could see him gazing at her curiously, stiffening at the way her hands slid up him. Before she could regret it or think twice, she moved closer and tilted his teeth to her right before planting a quick, firm kiss to the left side of his lower jaw.

Time stilled for Caine, pupils dilating and jaw frozen slack in place as she pulled away. The stars he had created just for her reflected in his eyes, her touch lingering everywhere they made contact. He didn't even realize he had placed his hand on his lower jaw until he saw her flushed face pulling away. His tongue tied, breath stolen from his metaphorical lungs, he could do nothing but stare at the woman before him that somehow seemed more beautiful than ever under his starlight.

Pomni's heart raced at the way he was looking at her. This was all too much. Why had she even done that? What was going on with her tonight? When he stared at her, frozen in time, her face burned more and she twiddled her thumbs. "U-uh, can you put me down, now?"

It took Caine a moment to register her words. "Y-yes. Of course, darling."

He didn't even have it in him to carry her down with him. No, she had left his code too starstruck with the gesture that mystified him. He simply snapped and the two of them were by the digital lake. She walked towards it and experimentally dipped her gloved finger into the waters, relishing in the sensations around her digits.

She looked back at him with a small smile, his code seeming to thrum excitedly at seeing her joy because of him.

Her taking the next step of intimacy left him confused, to say the least. There was far less about human emotion and mind that he understood, and if anything, the static-like feelings in his chest were nothing short of a mystery to him. Perhaps he'd have to check himself for a bug later.

No matter. He shook the thoughts from his head, the feeling still lingering as her floated by her side, unable to stop smiling at her quiet demeanor. She took in every detail he had added just for her, smiling to herself.

She'd have time to regret her forwardness later. Or scream into her pillow about developing a crush on an AI. For now, there was only this moment.

"Thank you, Caine."

"Anything for you, my dear."

And he meant it.

[mi-rae07]

Choi San : A Marriage Not Of Love (Part 1/3)

Pairing : Choi San (Ateez) and named character (Kim So-won)

____________________

Synopsis : San's grandfather had arranged his marriage with Sowon in order to hand their family company down to san, but sowon had fallen in love with him immediately. San had not, but knowing sowon would not marry otherwise he had pretended to love her. And so they got married, sowon truly wanting to devote her life to san and him pretending his smiles, love and care for his now wife.

But now that pretend facade is breaking down, and sowon is now aware of the fact that san does not really love her. But she loves him too much to leave, despite him being cruel and cold she still cannot bring herself to abandon the only man she has ever loved.

But will that crack too? Especially when san has a darker secret and past?

_______________________

A/n : the classic but I thought I should give it a small chance.

________________________

The very first time san met Kim Sowon he knew she was the one. She was perfect, she touched his hand and caressed his face and he felt nothing. Right then and there he knew that she'd be perfect in a marriage with him, he would never be manipulated by her. He would never feel vulnerable, because he didn't love her. In fact, he felt nothing for sowon.

Sowon meanwhile had knew san was the one she'd wanted her entire life, because in the beginning he was perfect. He had touched her arms, held her in his warm embrace and she'd felt everything. The corny sparks, the butterflies, everything. His words were so perfect, his actions all to the point. So when he'd proposed her marriage, she'd agreed immediately. Their marriage had been 3 years ago and it was perfect, so was their honeymoon.

Until he had to cut the 2 month honeymoon off midway because he had some important work suddenly back in the country. But he'd made up for that. Until it kept happening regularly, and he kept getting worse and worse.

It had been a year since then and sowon was now sitting up in her bed at night, having had a nightmare as she breathed heavily. San frowned as he woke up from his sleep as well, sitting up straight as he looked at his wife

San : what's wrong?

Not that san cared, but he supposed he had to pretend so she doesn't break this marriage off. It was important for him to stay married in order to continue as the chairman of the company, his grandfather believed in familial values and believed that if a man couldn't handle his own family and his own wife, love her and make her stay, then he definitely couldn't handle a company.

Sowon : you…you know that you're my husband right?

San chuckled, his hand sliding down her arm and back up again as he said

San : yes, my lovely wife, I am well aware that I am your husband. Did you wake me up in the middle of the night to remind me of our marriage?

Sowon shook her head as she said lowly

Sowon : your friend yena told me that you had gone out for coffee with her the day before yesterday.

It was all yena had been boasting about during some party, as if san were her husband and not sowon's.

San : I did, yes. Is something wrong with that, she's my friend.

Sowon : but san-ah you know I dislike her.

San raised his eyebrows as he said, his tone now defensive

San : are you asking me to stop being friends with someone just because you dislike them, is that it? That sounds rather controlling, don't you think?

Sowon looked at san as she said

Sowon : I just don't think her intentions with you are well.

San : and what exactly do you think her intentions with me are, sowon?

Sowon looked away, shaking her head as she decided not to have this conversation. After all san was right, she was being controlling. San never told her what friends to have and not have.

Sowon : will you go out for tea with me tomorrow, then?

San frowned at the sudden question, he wanted to say no but he knew he couldn't. and so he laid back against the bed before saying

San : of course I will. Whenever you ask, I'll be there. But just know, the tea is on you.

Sowon smiled as she laid back on san's arms, wrapping her own around his waist before saying

Sowon : I love you, san.

San hated this part the most, the part where she sounded so genuine with her love for him. Like she could do anything for him, when he was just deceiving her for his own benefits. But even so he wrapped his arm around her even though there was no warmth or affection to it, and sowon could feel it. As she had for the past year, she was no fool.

San : I love you too.

Sowon shut her eyes as she realized there was no meaning behind that sentence for him, just words he knew he had to say to make her stay with him.

______________________________

It had been 3 hours since sowon was sitting in the café, waiting for san to appear. The waitresses had come and gone, asking her if she was ready to order or leave. She’d ordered some water, if that was even an actual order and waited. Now she just growing embarrassed and angry. Just then she felt the door opening, san stepping in as if he was just on time.

As he saw her sitting at the corner table he smiled, walking towards her and sitting down before saying nonchalantly

San : have you ordered something?

Sowon : where have you been?

San : work, doing my own things.

San's body language screamed the fact that he did not want to be here although his words differed, and sowon hated it. She looked down at her empty plate as she said

Sowon : I've been waiting 3 hours.

San : and? I told you I was busy, I'm here right now though aren't I?

Sowon : you could've at least texted me that you'd be hours late.

San : I didn't have the time.

At this point san wasn't even pretending to care, he clearly looked as if he didn't want to be here and had better things to do.

Sowon : san you love me, don't you?

San : yes, of course I love you.

So emotionless, so cold and distant.

Sowon : then why…why do you not act like it?

Sowon's voice was now shaky from tears, and san didn't seem to care one bit. He just stared at her for a while before saying in a cool tone

San : I treat you well, don't I? I care for you, I protect you, I make sure you have everything you want and need.

He said all this but he had no love in his tone, his voice annoyed and impatient.

Sowon : what I want and need is you, san. I don't want all this money and these stupid dresses. I want you, I want my husband.

San : and you have me. I'm here, aren't I?

His voice was cold, but he kept that smile that looked practiced and unnatural. And seeing that made tears stream down sowon's cheeks, her lips trembling as she pressed them together. San huffed as he said

San : are you finished or are you going to keep complaining some more?

Sowon shook her head before wiping her tears away with her shaky hands

Sowon : I can see you don't want me here, so you don't have to force yourself. I'm leaving, and I'm sorry.

Sowon turned to leave, hoping san would stop her. But even as she walked outside the café he did not stop her, as if he was happy she'd left. And so as she rushed to her house she felt sobs spilling out her lips, the people around looking at her in confusion.

But she didn’t care, the person she wanted to look at her couldn't bother to even sit with her for fifteen minutes.

____________________________

Sowon was now sitting in their bed, san silently reading a book next to her on the bed with his back rested against the headboard. Sowon had waited for san to say something when he came back after what happened today afternoon, maybe an apology or an explanation as to why right after sowon had left and walked a few distance, she had seen san walking along with another lady to some shop. It had hurt sowon more than she could imagine, considering that this lady seemed to get san’s attention and time more than she did.

Sowon : did you have fun with that lady after I was gone from the café?

San looked up from his book with a frown, he hadn’t realised she’d seen that.

San : yes we went out to a shop to buy somethings, why? I didn’t think you’d care.

Sowon scoffed as she said

Sowon : of course, in your books a wife would not care about her husband going out and having fun with another lady when he can't even meet the wife in her eyes.

San rolled his eyes before looking back at his book as he said

San : can you stop being jealous of every other lady I talk to? Besides Oh Mina is a co-worker, we went out to choose an appropriate dress for the coming party. You're being paranoid.

Sowon : I'm being paranoid? This is called as loving someone, san. I agreed to marry you for the same reason, and I had thought you did too. Did you marry me because you loved me or because you just had to, san?

San : of course I married you because I loved you, because I cared for you. I married you because you mean so much to me, sowon.

And yet he wasn't looking at her, his words so cold and distant.

Sowon : your words…they all sound so empty.

San raised his eyebrows, getting annoyed at her words as he asked

San : are you trying to say that my loving words mean nothing? Accusing me of lying now, are you?

Sowon sighed, looking away as she said in a low tone

Sowon : you just use words, san, you never show your love to me. Ever.

San let out a tired breath as he said

San : can we not have this conversation right now? It's late and I'm tired. You're just thinking too much, sowon. We don't always need to be all over each other and expressing our love. We're married, and that's all that matters.

San kept his book away as he laid back down on the bed with a sigh before looking at sowon who was just staring at him with hurt eyes silently

San : stop with the puppy eyes, please. We're married and this is normal. The lovey-dovey, all over each other phase was just in the start of the relationship, the honeymoon phase.

Sowon chuckled sarcastically as she said

Sowon : we never even had a proper honeymoon phase, did we san? You cut it off half way through because you had important work, apparently.

San : and what about it? Isn't the fact that I had work to do a good enough excuse? You're acting as if I cut it off just to avoid being around you.

Sowon : you do avoid being around me.

Sowon's voice was low, her eyes drooped as san huffed and rolled his eyes again before saying

San : I avoid being around you now because you're just plain annoying. You're the whole reason why I don't even come up to the room until it's late at night. What's the point of sleeping in the same bed as someone who keeps complaining about you the entire night.

Sowon felt her heart break at his words as she felt tears threatening to spill, but she wouldn't let it. And so she stood up and grabbed a pillow before saying

Sowon : then don't, I'll sleep somewhere else.

Sowon turned to walk towards the door as san said nonchalantly

San : go ahead, sleep in the guest room if you want to. It's not as if I care about where you sleep anyway.

Sowon shut the door as she climbed up the stairs to the terrace, her body shaking from the tears as she cried. She didn't know why she was still staying in this marriage when san clearly didn't love her. She should be divorcing him, ruining his life, but she just couldn't. She was too weak.

Sowon opened the door to the terrace before stepping in, going over to the corner as she put the pillow on the floor before laying down as well. It was in the middle of December and there was snow falling all around her, it was freezing cold and she was only wearing a sheer silk night dress. But sowon supposed the terrible cold might distract her from the pain she was feeling.

It didn't, especially considering the fact that today had been her birthday and that being the reason why she'd wanted to go for tea with her husband. But not only had they not gone, he even said hurtful words to her and now she was sleeping in the terrace, shivering with cold already.

Sowon shut her eyes as tears streaked down them, small weak sobs falling from her lips. It wasn't like anyone would care to hear them anyway.

_____________________________

San had been eating his breakfast alone the next morning when he saw sowon entering the dining table with a shawl wrapped around her shoulders, her entire body shivering and looking like it was about to pass out any minute. San frowned as he realized she was terribly ill, and she was still here.

San : you should be in bed, what are you doing here?

Sowon let out a low groan as she sat in her usual place and stared at the food in front of her before saying weakly

Sowon : I always eat with you during breakfast before you go to work.

San's eyes slightly softened at her words and how ill she seemed to be, and she was still here to be with him.

San : but you should be in bed. Why aren't you feeling well?

Sowon lowered her eyes as she said in a quiet tone

Sowon : because I was sleeping in the terrace last night.

San's eyes widened as he looked at the window next to him, seeing that it was still snowing continuously. When she'd walked out of the room he had expected her to either go to some guest room or walk back in and sleep in their bed a few hours later. He looked back at sowon before asking

San : you were sleeping in the terrace? In this weather?

Sowon said nothing and that only caused san worry at her state of being.

San : why didn't you come in? why didn't you come back to bed, sowon?

Sowon : because you basically threw me out, san. You said you didn't want to sleep in the same bed as someone like me because all I did was complain and waste your time. That's what you said last night, right?

San went silent for a few seconds, not knowing what to say. Now he felt like this was his fault that she was so sick. Sowon let out a shaky breath as she hugged herself from the cold before saying

Sowon : leave it be.

San : why would you listen to my words like that and sleep in the bloody terrace, sowon?

Sowon : just forget about it, san.

San : like hell I'm going to forget about it! Don't you know how unsafe that is, sleeping out in the open like that? What if something bad happened to you, huh?

Sowon : then just marry someone else, marry yena.

San clenched his jaw as sowon mentioned yena's name yet again. Why did she never understand?

San : I am not going to marry shin yena. I'm married to you and I'm going to stay married to you.

Sowon didn't understand why san was getting so riled up over her potential death. Sowon scoffed as she said

Sowon : if I died that wouldn't matter anymore, so stop talking about it as if it's a great deal.

San stared at sowon for a few seconds, the anger in his eyes disappearing as he said in a cold tone

San : fine, it wouldn't matter to me. But you know what would? The insurance money I'd get for you dying under these circumstances, and trust me it would be a hell lot of money.

Sowon looked up at that, her eyes teary and broken from his words. How could he say things like this so easily, without a single care of what it would do to her?

Sowon : am I this worthless to you?

Her voice broke, causing san to freeze. Before he could say anything sowon said

Sowon : you don't even…I'm still utterly alone in this world.

She was bringing back the fact that she was an orphan again, something san hated hearing.

San : oh don't start that again. You're such a dramatic person sowon, you seriously need to stop.

A tear fell from sowon's eyes as she stood up, turning towards the maids before saying in a cold tone

Sowon : I don't want breakfast, feed it to the dogs.

San frowned at that as he said in a firm voice

San : what, no. Sit back down. You're barely able to stand and you expect me to just let you go hungry?

San's tone betrayed slight worry, but sowon could care less as she glared at san before saying

Sowon : yes, I do expect you to do that.

Sowon turned to leave, not saying anything more. San let out a breath as he stood up from his seat, rushing towards sowon and holding her arm to make her stop. He paused at how hot her arms felt to his cold touch, she really was sick

San : don't. I said sit back down.

San started pulling sowon back to her seat as she tried weakly fighting against his hold, knowing there was going to be no use already.

Sowon : let me go!

San : no. you're not walking around in this condition, especially without having eaten anything.

San pushed sowon down on her seat gently before saying, his voice final

San : you're going to sit right here and eat before you do anything else.

Sowon : I don't want to eat! I told you I wasn't bloody hungry.

San glared right back at her before saying

San : I don't care if you're not hungry, sowon, you don't even look capable of walking right now so I'm forcing you to eat.

Sowon : san-

San : you can't survive on an empty stomach alone with this fever. So you're going to stay here and eat, even if I have to shove that food down your throat myself.

Sowon looked away from san, still not bothering to eat. He sighed, saying in a more softer tone now

San : eat, sowon.

Sowon stared at the food as she felt tears in her eyes again, at how san was being and the pathetic situation she was in.

Sowon : what can't you just leave me be, san?

San's irritation melted away when he saw sowon's eyes tearing up, especially when she was shivering so much because of the cold and all because he was being so cruel to her. He took a deep breath before loosening his hold on her arm as he said, softer than ever

San : come on, just have a little something to eat, please sowon-ah.

Sowon sniffled as she took the spoon in her shaky hands, feeding herself some soup as tears streamed down my cheeks. She hated this, deciding she wasn't going to talk to him now.

San stayed silent as he watched sowon eat, feeling relieved that she was finally eating something. He had been sitting opposite her for a few minutes when he saw that she was still shivering slightly, causing him worry again as he asked

San : are you still feeling cold?

Sowon took a big gulp of her soup before saying

Sowon : it doesn't matter.

And to her utter annoyance she shivered right after those words, proving it entirely wrong. San sighed as he said

San : it does matter, you might end up with a fever worse than this if you keep going on like this.

San watched as sowon finished her soup, realizing she wasn't going to talk to him.

San : just come here.

Sowon : no, I don't need it.

Her voice was still shaky as her tears continued to wet her clothes, she didn't want san to think she had no self-respect. But he didn't care about that, her health was more important than some stupid self-respect. San stared at her before hardening his voice as he said

San : come here. Right now.

Sowon pressed her trembling lips together as she got up from her seat and walked towards san who was sitting a bit away from her, sowon feeling pathetic once again. San pulled her by the arm towards him as she fell onto his lap, him wrapping his arms around her immediately as he began rubbing her cold shoulders to keep her warm.

He could see that the maids had left already, leaving them all alone.

San : shh, I'll take care of you.

Sowon shut her eyes tightly as more tears streamed down her cheeks, her lips wobbling as she tried to keep herself from crying out loud. San ran his hand along her shoulders as he whispered gently

San : it's okay, you're going to be okay sowon-ah.

Sowon broke down in his arms at those words as she sobbed against his chest, her painful cries filling the now empty dining hall as san rested his head against the top of hers. He was comforting her when the reason of her tears were him, how ironic for them.

San : I'm so sorry. It's going to be alright.

Sowon knew nothing was going to be alright, she knew he didn't care and never would. And as if he had heard her thoughts he said softly

San : I do care, sowon.

Sowon shook her head, sniffling as she said brokenly

Sowon : you…you don't. You don't care even the-even the slightest. You're just doing this because you have no other choice san.

San pressed his lips together as he let his hand run through her hair and he suddenly felt guilty at how weak sowon sounded. This was all his fault, and that realization hit him harder than ever before as he held sowon's weak body in his arms.

San : I never should've done this to you.

Sowon finally let her arms wrap around san's neck as she felt the fever making her dizzy and more vulnerable. And so she whispered sadly

Sowon : I love you, I know you don't love me and never will but I don't care about any of that. I will still love you, san.

San : I…

San did not know what to say, he just knew he didn't deserve that from her. At all.

San : do you know how foolish it is to say those words to me?

Sowon : I don't care, I don't bloody care how foolish or pathetic it is.

San's arms tightened around sowon's now light body as he realized that the fever and pain was taking a toll on her, he was destroying her and it felt like his heart cracked for the first time in years. He felt a lump form in his throat as he whispered

San : I don't deserve that.

San felt sowon's body get heavier, her arms around him loosening as he realized she was slowly falling asleep. San kept rocking her back and forth as his grip around her tightened, bringing her even closer to his chest as he tried to keep her as warm as possible.

San : I'm so sorry won-ah.

San held the side of her head as he kissed her forehead, feeling her feverish body nuzzle even closer to him as she mumbled his name, half asleep. That brought a sad smile to san's lips as he wrapped the shawl tighter around her so she'd feel as warm as possible. And just like that his wife had fallen asleep in his arms for the first time ever.

San fell into a small trance as he realized that she'd fallen asleep against him, all cuddled up and warm. He stayed silent as he cradled her in his arms and felt the warmth of her body against his. His hand continued rubbing her shoulders as he felt his heart well up with emotions.

Sowon was like a small, innocent child when she was alseep, and he could never hate her when she was being like this. Not that he could hate her otherwise either, but he had to pretend. He just had to.

San ran his hands along her hair as he rocked her back and forth before whispering in a broken tone

San : happy belated birthday my love.

San closed his eyes as a tear slipped past the corner of his eyes, remembering the whole reason behind their fucked up marriage.

___________________________________

FLASHBACK :

San had been kneeling down against his mother's grave, his eyes red and teary from all the crying he had done the past 2 days. He hated himself, and the crescent shaped cuts in his palm along with the various other cuts in his body that was covered by his suit indicated it.

Soohyun : you dare cry at the grave of the woman you caused the death of, you filthy bastard?

San flinched and looked up to face his brother who was now glaring down at him, his eyes red as well. San felt more tears slip past his eyes as he said

San : I'm so sorry, hyung. I'm so sorry I didn't mean to-

Soohyun : you didn't mean to stab your own mother?

San flinched at his words, still remembering his own mother's blood in his hands, her dead body falling limp against him. It was an accident, he thought she was someone else. He was trapped in that place, it was so dark and he was so scared, he hadn't heard anyone's voice for weeks. He didn't know it was his mother, he had no idea when he spilt all his anger at the masked figure in front of him whom he thought was his captive.

He had only realized it was his beloved mother when he heard her strangled groan, her bloodied hands coming up to hold his cheek as it smeared her own blood on it. He could still feel it, like a burn against his skin.

Soohyun : she had come to save you, she'd risked her own life to go to that place and get you out and you…you killed her.

San sobbed at his brother's words, hugging his legs as san begged pathetically

San : please forgive me, I'm so sorry please forgive me hyung. I didn't kn-know, it was an accident please.

Soohyun kicked his younger brother away from him with disgust, staring down at him with such hatred san felt his heart break into pieces.

Soohyun : you took the one person I loved away from me, and one day I will do the same to you. One day when you marry, and have your wife that you love so much, I will kill her the same way you killed my mother. I will drain her off her blood brutally and have you watch it, choi san. I will make you regret ever having loved her.

And just like that soohyun had left a broken san behind, his wails ringing around the empty graveyard as he felt his life crumble upon him. He remembered sowon then, the young lady his grandfather had found for him to get married to because he wanted the company to go down to san and not soohyun. He remembered the way she had looked at him so softly, smiling at him with so much love.

He had loved her too, but now he couldn't. because loving her meant causing her death, soohyun would kill her. And not marrying her would mean his grandfather would give the company to soohyun, and given his character san could only imagine the destruction he'd bring with that much power.

And so he'd made the decision, to marry kim sowon but never love her.

__________________________________

[schoenht]

↳ devotion of a contrarian

character: ace trappola

a/n: shout out to natsume who is starving for ace content so i am biting her head and feeding her <3 anyways @kunikame

warnings: fem!reader implications

When was the last time he could remember seeing her smile at him in an unadulterated manner? In a way that he did not have to wonder if there was a secret message behind such a movement? Perhaps it was when they were really little, blissfully unaware of what life was going to prepare for them.

"Catch me if you can!"

"Ace, if I do, you'll act like you weren't playing. I'm faster than you."

"Oh yeah? Prove it! Let's race right now!" The best way teachers could describe him was a precocious boy. The kids around him said he was popular and the fastest runner in their grade. But he didn't care what anyone else had to say: his eyes stayed on his princess.

The princess was not someone to mess with, not because you were scary, but due to the fact that you would not hesitate to make anyone eat dust for trying to challenge you, competitive as you were. Ace could only think about that gleam in your eye, the promise he made of proposing a legitimate challenge for you to conquer.

And conquer it you did, like always. Ace didn't know what went over him, but every time, when he played tag with others, he'd win. But with you, it was different. Unless it was a class sport and they were team captains on opposite ends; that was when they'd tear each other apart in what can only be described as two shooting stars, combined and falling together.

He loved teasing you, loved seeing how you rolled your eyes and walked away from him. However, the tiny smile tugging at the corner of your lips told him that you liked the challenge. He consistently kept teasing you, the two of you poking and prodding each other to annoy the other. In reality, it was like a subtle action, one in which the two of you were at a mutual understanding for at least a couple of moments.

It was never meant to stay as such, however. You were a princess. He was nobody. He was not a lord or a prince, not a duke or even someone from the High Court. He was a lowly commoner who had gotten mercy from the princess that did not know any better. And yet, even then, he'd always receive letters at night from weary-looking birds that flapped their wings inside his room, gave him his letter, and made a beeline for the exit to sleep.

Each letter was simple at the beginning, merely stating how your day went, what they were teaching at the royal academy, the occasional sarcastic remark about him that was merely an inside joke between the two of them. He always liked these jabs at him, it made him remember that the princess was not just his princess, you were his princess.

The years went by, your letters exchanged. The writing grew more mature based on the eloquent sentences, mixed with a bit of lighthearted taunting. He hadn't told you that he was planning to try out for one of the knights, particularly your own knight. At a certain age, all royals required a knight of their own to be around for a long time and he would be that knight.

He was dedicated to the craft but if anyone asked him about it, he would deny any allegations that it was due to the princess. He only worried a bit when he realized that technically speaking, he did not know you as well anymore. They had only been linked through letters. Was it enough? Would you still cherish him?

These worries just made him train harder until he was officially elected as your knight. It was the most glorious job he could have: protecting you in public, joking with you in private. He loved it. He loved the invigorating feeling of affability that came with the presence of his princess. His princess, the same one who hung the stars in his eyes.

In the present day, he was stuck, however. The slight yearning feeling when he saw her, smiling brightly at other nobles in a way that he would never be able to have. The princess, who only shows your true self to him, but still manages to leave him astounded with the beginning of a teasing taunt on his lips. The princess, who in the gloominess of the winter skies, shows him the beauty of your summer eyes.

Ace was perched by the entrance, his scarlet eyes a mirror for those who merely moved past him. He could not care less of those royals that left the premises, they were not important to him. But he watched as his princess waltzed in the halls. Your dance was something out of a dream, and yet, you just had to be paired up with nobles who danced as if they were going to collapse if they did not move with speed belonging to a maniac. He watched painfully as these people dragged you around and you had to hide how she really felt behind a mask.

It was torture to watch you dance and him not being the one to hold you close.

"You know, you shouldn't be staring so much. You're too obvious." His fellow guard, Deuce, was a model knight, never slacking off no matter who it was for. Ace only served you, no one else so what did it matter to try and protect the others?

"No one's going to notice. For all the other royals care, we're dead to them until they need us to protect them from some stupid assassin."

"Our duty--"

"Is our duty. Jeez, Juice, do you never get tired of repeating the same line over and over again? You're sounding like Riddle."

Deuce squinted at him, crossing his arms. "Our captain is right. If it wasn't for us following the rules, we wouldn't be in the position of protecting the princess."

With his chin in his hand, Ace's eyes wandered back to the princess and how you glided across the ballroom floor. There was something hidden behind those pretty eyes of yours, clearly disdain for your dance partner. He hesitated before he decided to do the dumbest thing he could have possibly done as your knight. He carefully moved over to you, asking for permission to dance with you. "May I?"

"Of course." You said, formally solely to keep up the act of peering eyes from those who were searching for gossip. Of course, what was better gossip than the princess dancing with her own knight?

"You truly suck at dancing." Ace grinned at you as he held one of your hands in his, the other gently on your waist. The waltz he led was one that the two of you fell into so easily. It was the very same one that he had taught you in the whispers of the dark, the silence of the night. The same waltz that encouraged the yearning of a kiss, yet detained by their roles.

Even now, you could not help yourself from making a remark. "Seems like the teacher doesn't know his own course. You taught me this, remember?"

"Ah yes, but unlike you, I can actually do it well. If my waltzing was a class, you would have failed."

"You wouldn't even pass the test to become a teacher."

Your friendly bickering was the norm and if it did not happen, that would usually mean something was wrong. Ace did not remember the last time he saw your tears; nevertheless, the dreaded event happened about a month after the ball. He had been ready to serve you that day, to joke around with you. But he had seen how you isolated yourself, how cold you were. The iciness of your tone could have frozen him and yet he only felt the warmth of his adoration for you.

"What's wrong?" He sat carefully next to you, a hand on your back. He knew your subtle signs of when you were upset, and today it was more obvious. "Don't lie to me. I know when you're lying."

You looked up at your ceiling, inhaling before speaking. "I have been betrothed to someone I do not know."

Ace could feel everything around him shatter. Was it the earth shaking or was it him? Perhaps the earth was preparing to swallow him whole. No, it was worse. He saw a glimmer of your tears on your cheeks as you quickly moved to hide. Your voice held so much pain and anguish that it tore him to shreds, wanting nothing more than to help, to contribute to the joy that you should be feeling. Without your smile, no matter how sunny it was outside, he would only feel the world's darkness. "When did you find out?"

"Yesterday night."

"Why didn't you tell me?" He whispered, carefully moving beside you. His rambunctious demeanor slipped away, in place was the Ace who was always prepared to do whatever it took to see your happiness again.

You could feel your throat burn as you looked at him. "How was I supposed to say it? 'Oh, hey, Ace, by the way, I am getting married to a man I don't know and I have to choose my dress because the king says so, but hey, what's for lunch?'"

As if on cue, the king had ordered for him to go to his throne room, where he would receive a new mission. When he left you behind, his limbs went numb, unfeeling, like his own heart did. Strange. His symbol was that of a living heart that held up even through the worst times. So why was his own being crushed by a void he could never get out of?

His new mission, according to the king, was to protect your soon-to-be husband. Ace's face dropped. He would never be able to do that. His loyalty was to you, not to anyone else. To make matters worse, he would have to protect the man who stole you from him, the man who stole any possibility of him being with you.

But maybe not.

Ace knew it wasn't time for his rounds yet so he snuck into your room from the window. The rain pelted at his face, blinding him; however, he was led to you only through the notion of what he had in mind.

When you opened the window, you gasped. "Ace, what the hell are you doing? It's raining hard outside!"

He didn't waste any time grasping your hands. His were cold and so were yours. In the coldness bloomed a fervor that both individuals hid from each other. His words were rushed too. "Run away with me."

"What?!"

His voice was in his throat, but for the first time in forever, you could finally see the love he had hidden away. The love that he had for you was one you would never obtain in your arranged marriage. It was the same love that he had harbored for you since elementary school. "As a knight, I am to follow orders, no matter if I see fit or not. I am not going to protect a man who I will never respect. My loyalty is to you. It always has been."

"Ace, I--"

"No, listen to me for once. There is no me if you do not exist. Every single star in the universe could collapse, but you will always be the one that I will see. I do not care if I never see the sun, your eyes show me the sun, the moon, and the skies. Not a single flower will ever bloom if it does not have you amongst them. Princess...who am I, if I do not have you to love? I don't fear anything, except living the rest of my life without the feeling you give me. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on. Please, run away with me."

His words were the most serious and desperate they ever were with you. How much he loved you all these years came rushing to you at once. You could never be separated from him, not now, not ever. There were so many sacrifices you'd make before you would be apart from him. No other options were good enough for you, because it would always be him. It was always Ace.

There was one choice to make and it was yours.

[alicewonderao3]

If Tomorrow Never Comes

Title: If Tomorrow Never Comes

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader

Characters: Aaron Hotchner, fem!reader, Jack Hotchner, Haley Hotchner.

Summary: It's another late night, and Aaron can't sleep. As he lays awake and watches the love of his life, he wonders if she knows how he really feels.

Warnings: Sort of sad, but happy. fluffy.

Authors note: I was listening to some Garth Brooks while cleaning and his song, 'If Tomorrow Never Comes,' just screamed Aaron Hotchner. If you've heard it, you know exactly what it's about. I knew I had to write something for him. It was something the muses demanded. I borrow part of Garth's lyric's for the song, and I don't own them. I have no beta, so all spelling and grammar mistakes are mine. Borrowed lyrics are italitced. Oh, this is from his point of view, which is new for m, and it's shorter than I usually write, but this is what the muses delivered. Enjoy!

It was late. Way too late for him to still be awake, but he can't help it. He glances over at her, lying next to him in bed. She's asleep, her eyes closed, her hair spread out in a halo beneath her head, her lips softly parted. She's gorgeous, even when she sleeps. He can't help but reach out and push her hair back behind her ear, a tiny smile spreading across his face as he watches her move towards his touch. 

He reaches over and turns off the light, lying there next to her in the dark, just staring at her face as the moonlight illuminates her features. Suddenly, a dark thought crosses his mind, one he's used to having, but admittedly, hasn't had in months. What if he never woke up tomorrow? What if he didn't come back from a case? 

His eyes stay focused on her as he wonders if he shows her that he loves her enough. Does she know how much he loves her? Does she know that she and Jack are his entire world? Is all the love in the past he's given her enough? He reaches out again, unable to help himself, his fingers gently moving across her cheek. 

He can't help but think about Haley, even now. It didn't matter that they were divorced, he'd been bad about telling her how much he loved her. He still felt the regret that he'd never been able to articulate his true feelings to her. So he made a promise in the days after Haley had died, and it grew even stronger when he met the love of his life: He'd tell her every day how much she meant to him. She would know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, just how much he loved her, and so would Jack. 

He scoots closer to her in the bed, his dark brown eyes focused on her through the veil of tears that fall over his eyes, his fingers soft on her face. He takes a second to drink in her beauty, to wonder how he got so lucky to find love a second time around. Most people aren't so lucky, to begin with, but to have someone so devoted to him? He never thought he'd ever have that twice. 

His fingers are soft as he gently whispers, his voice soft. "If tomorrow never comes, do you know how much I love you? Do I try in every way, to show you every day, that you're my only one? And if my time on Earth were through, you'd have to face this world without me. Is the love I give you every day, gonna be enough to last if tomorrow never comes?" 

He's a bit startled when he watches her eyes flutter open, a look of concern on her face as she sits up. "I love you," He whispers to her and she nods, reaching up to wipe the tears away as they slip down his cheeks. "I know." She says, her voice soft and sweet. "I know how much you love me, Aaron. I love you just as much." 

He holds her, tightly in his arms, as she rubs his back, pressing soft and sweet kisses along his cheeks and lips before he lays down and holds her. She falls asleep as he rubs her back, his hand moving over her in soft and soothing motions and her last words before sleep claim her are, "I love you, Aaron." It's the last thing he hears as sleep claims him too, holding her tightly in his arms, his promise renewed. 

If it's the last thing he does, no matter what for the rest of his life, he's going to tell her he loves her. Every day, in a hundred and million ways. She will never doubt how he feels about her, how much he loves her, how much he'd move the heavens and the Earth for her. She will know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loves her with everything he has because you never know if tomorrow is going to come or not. 

[iolypse]

qsmp eggs as D&D characters because I can't help but fuse both of my current fixations together

Chayanne — Ive decided that every single egg is a dragonborn for the sake of simplicity, so that just brings me to figuring out class and subclass for each of them. I originally was thinking a simple fighter for Chayanne, but then, upon remembering what was quite literally an oath to protect everyone, decided he'd make a rather good paladin, particularly oath of devotion. he's devoted to keeping everybody safe, no matter the cost. if I were to give him a breath weapon, it'd be fire. he's a dragonborn paladin (devotion)!

Tallulah — Tallulah was always going to be a bard, are you kidding me? from there, looking through all the bard subclasses, I figured lore suited her best. she collects info! she gave qwil that book full of info about marigolds, she asks questions so she can know more about the world. yeah. she's a smart girl. dragonborn bard (lore).

Dapper — this is THE artificer. this autistic fuck (/affectionate bc me too buddy, me too) loves everything machinery, and he's fuckin good at it, too. considering his additional love for collecting animals, I've decided to make him a battle smith so he can have a steel defender. he would take very good care of it. I considered armorer due to the unique sets of armor I've seen him wear, but battle smith suited him just a tad better. he's a dragonborn artificer (battle smith).

Ramón — Ramón is also THE artificer! they are artificer pals. while Dapper focuses more on combat-ready mechanics, Ramon's been doing a lot of work on his elevator. also, bombs! fuck, he and qfit have so many bombs, they're practically their first line of defense. therefore, artillerist. he's good at throwing shit across the battlefield, staying stationary and hunkered down. dragonborn artificer (artillerist).

Leonarda — Leo was a little difficult. from the beginning, I knew I wanted her to be a primarily martial class, but I didn't want to leave her without any magic, either. so I figured a monk could be fitting due to their innate ki. considering. you know. dragon. I just had to give her ascendant dragon. dragonborn monk (ascendant dragon).

Bobby — oh yeah, this boy's a fighter alright. I considered barbarian for his tendency to sometimes throw tantrums, but it just wasn't right for him. I definitely considered gunslinger, but he's not particularly known for his guns, and I was eventually led to banneret, aka the purple dragon knights. he's definitely one of the braver kids, and I think his bold deeds could definitely inspire those around him. Bobby is a dragonborn fighter (banneret).

Richarlyson — he was kind of difficult! Richarlyson has picked up a number of skills from all six of his dads, making him fairly versatile and all-around skilled. I was, however, leaning a more martial class, and looked to monk first. none of the subclasses felt right, so I went bard due to their jack of all trades thing. wasn't right, so I thought about ranger, and that seemed like it could work due to their wide range of specialization. looking through subclasses, I picked monster slayer out of the bunch. just about all of his dads are terrorized by cucurucho in one way or another. he's practically got a sixth sense for the fucker now. Richarlyson's a dragonborn ranger (monster slayer).

Tilín — that's a rogue. yeah. that's a rogue. qQ himself taught them all about lying to other people to get what you want, and you're gonna tell me that's not a fucking rogue? right. rogue has a ton of interesting subclasses, but I felt like soulknife was a really interesting pick for her. soulknife rogues focus on the manipulation of the mind, fucking with a person's head to change their perception or easily slip by them. felt like they could use a little bit of magic, too, so he's got the psionic abilities that come with it. this is a dragonborn rogue (soulknife).

Juanaflippa — considered fighter gunslinger, but this is also a rogue! not a particularly magical one, though. Juanaflippa never really had much, always too busy shooting guns and coping with her parents' numerous divorces. HOWEVER, when you consider the whole necromancy element of her character (died, came back, fucking died again) on top of all the headcanons of her haunting the island, she's a pretty fun phantom. she's got an innate connection to death and the undead, and she knows what's dead when she sees it. I debated scout, but phantom was too cool to pass up. dragonborn rogue (phantom) for her.

Trump — I don't know shit about trump, but I like to think that if he survived longer, he would've taken after the crazy science aspect of both his dads, giving it a magical twist and going wizard. figured either evocation or abjuration would be good subclasses for him. decided on abjuration because damn, that's what this kid needed. dragonborn wizard (abjuration).

bonus:

gegg — plasmoid/changeling bard (valor). if you can find my other post on the English speakers as D&D classes, he's literally just slimecicle. nothing too special here. gegg.

[andrastesgrace]

Mara Jade + tooka cats

There are two Luke Skywalkers.

The farmboy-turned-flyboy in him is a crack shot, can diagnose a problem with her ship faster than any mechanic in the core, and is wickedly funny, when he wants to be. When he remembers he can be.

The Jedi, though - the one who is allergic to colors and smiling, the one who has apparently forgotten that he isn't even thirty years old yet - is a gifted mediator, a skilled warrior, and much to Mara's eternal annoyance, usually right.

He's also a little shit. She'd almost jumped out of her skin last week in her Coruscant docking bay when he just. Appeared. Behind her. Wearing that stupid passive expression and looking at her expectantly, as though she shouldn't have sworn in three languages and nearly sliced him in half with his own father's lightsaber.

"If only someone were willing to train you," he said with a completely straight face. "You might've seen that coming."

Mara called him a bastard, then, and he grinned. She threw a spanner at his head for good measure, but he just stepped aside and asked her if she was hungry.

They ate ribenes from a cart in the lower city, and didn't talk about his thinly veiled request.

He asks less, now, and she's not sure if she's relieved or disappointed. Since the beginning, he's always asked, even back when she wasn't sure if she still wanted to kill him or not. But now, as then, she's wary. Not of him, not really. She's run through every scenario in her head, and she doesn't really think he'd ever truly become a danger. But he also doesn't want to listen to her, either, when she suggests that perhaps, some Jedi teachings of the past should stay in the past.

Deep down, there's something that makes her uncomfortable about the way he can just. Switch off his entire personality like the press of a button. He would never hurt her, but sometimes he isn't him.

So instead of becoming his student, she devotes her time to becoming a pain in his ass. Annoying him is the quickest way to shake him out of it. At first it's just little things - mispronouncing the names of famous podracers, putting pepper in his tea, and once, conspiring with R2-D2 to play nothing but Nemoidian showtunes everywhere he went.

"You're doing this on purpose," he says blithely one afternoon, and she looks at him with an innocent. "Who me?" in her expression. After a while, she needs more ammunition. She means to ask Solo, but when she hunts down the office he never uses in the New Republic's shiny new military complex, Leia is there instead. "Tooka cats," says Leia after she explains her mission.

"Tooka cats?" "He can't even look at them without laughing," The corners of her lips turn up in a half-smile. "Something about the eyes." *** "Are you proud of yourself?" he says when she sees him later, the grin still lingering in his eyes as he lets himself onto the Jade's Fire.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She does. She watched it on the holos, the emergency channel on his datapad pinging as he stood in the background of some very important New Republic something-or-other. The first time, he managed to keep a straight face, but only just. But she didn't just have one. She wasn't an amateur. All in all, she sent him about thirty of the most ridiculous pictures of tooka cats that she could possibly find. They were naturally funny looking creatures - a little too creepy for her taste, with their beady eyes and claws, but something about them made Skywalker take one look at them and forget he was a Jedi at all. The sight of him bursting into giggles on live broadcast while Mon Mothma was trying to give a Very Important Speech is going to keep her going for *years.*

"You're a menace," he says, dropping down next to her where she's examining her ship's tractor beam manifold. Thing's been malfunctioning for months.

"I'm a delight."

Skywalker is quiet for a moment. His bright blue eyes catch on the faulty wiring she's been attempting to finagle into working order since she landed here, and he absently grabs a spanner and begins tinkering.

This close, she doesn't have to reach to feel the shifting current of his emotions. "You are," he says softly. A few twists of his hand and a couple of button presses, and the tractor beam's diagnostics panel is all green. Showoff. "I wish you'd let me train you," he says finally, setting the spanner down beside him. There are no accusation in the words, but she feels the lingering merriment in the Force give way to a dull loneliness. Mara knows why he keeps asking, and it's not because she's any great Jedi talent. She's...fine at it, she supposes, but Skywalker is asking for one thing when he needs another. "I'd be an awful student," she says finally, bumping her shoulder with his, and he gives her his own version of Leia's half-smile . "But I guess I should probably make sure you aren't dead from time to time." He chuckles, and shakes his head. "Yeah, you're my best friend, too."

[expirisims]

This Sim Makes Me so Sad

Welcome to the first of the Redden households. Jasmine Reed lives with her boyfriend, Shorty Redden and son Ephraim. Originally the household had another adult, Lori, but she moved out via SP at the beginning of the playthrough. Both Shorty and Jasmine are in the medical career track, but neither has progressed beyond the entry level.

I kept getting an interaction from the mailbox to return stolen item. I assumed Shorty had stolen thing, but no...

Jasmine!! Really??

Ephraim was down for a nap when they got home from work. They had a few moments to chat before Shorty ran off to a party he'd been invited to at the Lum's.

I almost forgot about the dog! This one I remember the name of because it is Brooks. He was named through SP, but Shorty HATES Brooks Cassidy so I can't help but feel like he named his dog Brooks on purpose as a dig to Brooks the human sim. I have no way around this...Shorty is NOT a very nice Sim and I feel so bad for Jasmine and Ephraim, but Jasmine is devoted to him.

Shortly after Shorty left for the party, she spontaneously began crying about her life! It's so sad. I'm sure she'd love to get out some too, but financially they are on a sinking ship so her entire life consists of work, paying bills and taking care of Ephraim, who still doesn't sleep through the night. I'm going to be honest, she really got to me. She has such a sad Sim life. I'm going to see what I can do to help her out.

Apparently the party at the Lum's was formal.

Shorty is checking on the twins while Teddy cooked.

Interesting...I don't think I'd put these two together, but here we are...

He abandoned the party to play guitar out in the front yard of the Lum's.

Jasmine trying to keep herself occupied while Shorty is still at the party. Does she have anything to worry about? Well, he IS a flirty Sim.

Back with Shorty and um...I think everyone else has gone to bed. Perhaps it's time to go home?

Looks like Ephraim is up just in time for bed. Oh great, who's going to stay up with the baby?

[neteyamyawne]

350 Followers Special

How they are when they have a bad day : (Human/Recom version)

Grace :

If she's having a hard time, her first thought is 'where are her damned cigarettes?!' then you, though she tries to quit for you but old habits die hard, right? And she relapses again.

The next second after a cigarette is between her fingers, she can only think of one person and that's you, it's a bad day and without you by her side to calm her down, let's just say the poor scientists are getting their asses handed back to them.

Moments later when you are in her presence, her mood lightens immediately, her shoulder slumped in relaxation with your mere presence, you comfort her in a way no one does.

You hold her hand tightly in yours as she rants about her day VERY loudly in the middle of the lab, cursing the hell out of Parker for pissing her off but she is relaxed and comforted by your calm words and eventually cools down enough to go back to her work but you can't because she wants you by her side until she feels completely normal, so you end up staying with her for the whole day till you go to bed together.

Norm :

Norm turns really quiet and his anger is passive aggressive, he would talk silently to himself, murmuring angrily until you catch him doing it.

Then he'd turn sheepish as you ask him if he's okay or not, his normally ardor personality turned nervous as he tries to explain what's happening.

He has an ascetic life, devoted to Pandora and it's plant and animal and with you by his side, he was almost always at peace, so to see him angry and frustrated over something does not happen day to day

He surely but quietly talks to you about his day and what's bothering him as you sit by his side and listen intently, he doesn't need much, as everyone just always over looks his opinion so when you willingly listen to him it brings him at peace instantl.

Trudy :

Trudy is really expressive about her likes and dislikes, you may end up cleaning a cut or two after the heated argument she had with someone.

Her anger and temper always flares in seconds but your presence, even in the same premises as she is, keeps her anger in control.

She doesn't like it when you get upset when she loses her anger, but if she's truly having a bad day, all she needs is you, holding your hand, hugging you from behind, cuddling, anything but she needs to be close to you.

Her anger melts away with one look in your eyes, instantly calming down onto peaceful emotion as she's clinging to you now.

Quaritch :

He's stubborn, and i mean stubborn to a level where he would rather die than talk about his feelings, so if something is bothering him, you have to find out yourself

Though he won't ask to be close to you but he'd sneak touches from you every now and then, placing an arm around your shoulders or waist for a moment, pressing his hands on your shoulder while purposely standing behind you and so on.

By the end of the day you start to ignore him for his stubbornness and then he's begging for you to talk to him after he was done with ignoring you for your concerns about him

He won't open up easily, you have to coax it out of him even then but steadily starts speaking and tells you everything, he's hesitant because of his oh-so-tough nature but your soft approach always makes him happy at the end of it.

Zdinarsk :

Z-dog has various ways of expressing her sadness or annoyance, she's a ball of energy ready to unwind at any moment, so her reactions are unpredictable.

Though her unpredictable nature definitely becomes a challenge to you, you have to guess what mood she might be in when you see her after a particularly bad day, it can vary from cuddling to being in the mood of literal bloodshed.

It's a guessing game you love to conquer but as time goes by you begin to know her like the back of your hand and with time she's comfortable enough to let you handle her emotions too.

You both are perfect for each other, like puzzle pieces carved for one another, her impatience is matched with your calmness, which balances you relationship out evenly.

A/n : i really thought i won't get to 350 😭 you guys are so great omgg y'all are really spoiling me and i thought my writing was trash lmao, I'm glad 350 of you people decided i was worth following 😘

© Neteyamyawne 2023 | All Rights Reserved. Do not repost on other platforms, copy, steal, or translate any of my works!

[thegratefulsouth]

Things Carol Peletier and Willow Rosenberg have in common. Because yes.

I should note that this started out as a comparison piece between Caryl and Willoz, because, so many reasons, but as it turned out, by not as many reasons as ...

Parallels between Carol and Willow.

I had one of those bead chokers when I was in high school. That should really tell you everything you need to know.

1. They both start out utterly adorable

and precious

and Carol stays that way. I should point out that I don't normally acknowledge BtVS beyond Season 3. That is like a whole other post though, which maybe isn't entirely pro-Willow (because of, primarily, her behaviours, not partner choice), so let's quickly side step that, and return to the original point of this post:

2. They both start out quite meek and then experience substantial arcs and character growth and

3. They both fall for honourable men of somewhat few words. Daryl initially, mostly, pulses with emotion, Oz does NOT emote as a general rule. But both men are serious thinkers, Oz unhurried and often philosophical in his articulation, while Daryl speaks straight from his heart. They are also both poster guys for how to treat women with respect and honour (again, pre-early Season 4 for our Oz), and both men depart a devotion to love that is quite exceptional. Properly unpacking all of this = another post, another day.

Carol and Willow each display a unique moment of bravery in intimacy early on, something that had previously been out of character for each of them. They are both essentially rejected in these moments, but it's just the beginning of something special. Though Carol's joking harkens to a possible older version of herself, it's one that she never had the chance to fully develop, being forced to bury her playfulness during her abusive marriage. Willow is still so young in this moment, she has endured years of bullying and being cast aside, and being somewhat emotionally neglected by her parents. She is just now starting to open her wings for the first time.

In Innocence, Willow asks Oz, "Do you want to make out with me?"

While in Seed, Carol jokes to Daryl, "Kinda romantic, wanna screw around?"

And Daryl's reaction, as we know, is, "Pfft."

After telling Willow he's not going to kiss her because she clearly still has a thing for Xander, Oz jumps into his breathtaking(Cherokee Rose worthy)ly, beautiful impression of the events, his desires, and assures her he can wait. This is where Willow truly falls for him.

4. They accept their men as they are, not needing them to change. When Oz discovers he is a werewolf, Willow assures him she'd still if he'd still. And as we know, Oz happily stills. And everyone lives happily ever after when the show ends after Season 3.

Carol sees straight through Daryl's prickly defense mechanism exterior. His actions have won her over eternally. She accepts him, walker ears, bouts of rage, and all. "You're every bit as good as them." She tells him. "Every bit."

5. Neither woman wants to be alone. Carol reveals this to Rick in Indifference, sharing one of the reasons she stayed with Ed.

Willow wears her own yearning like a banner throughout the entire series, her early social awkwardness (perfection) inhibiting the romantic connections she is seeking. At least until she catches the eye of one young man in particular, who loves her for it. None of us wants to be alone, but Carol and Willow seem to struggle with that disproportionately in early life and it impacts their decision making, and future trajectories, deeply.

6. Their men are always looking out for them, trying to warn them, get through to them.

Oz reveals his concerns about Willow's increasing foray into the world of magic you didn't encourage her, did you, telling Willow he's afraid that she'll get hurt. He knows what it's like to have power he can't control, and it's not fun.

Though Carol's descent is, IMO, more justified, more understandable following Henry's murder, the potential consequences for her are just as risky. Moreso. Daryl tries, desperately, so many times, to talk her off the ledge, acknowledging that she doesn't care what happens to herself, reminding her that they have a future.

7. In the 2nd last season of each of their shows, Carol and Willow traject into a dark arc after their loved one is murdered, and need their best friend to save them

to pull them back.

There are sooo many differences between this pair too. Willow makes many self serving decisions. It's complicated, and unfortunate. Carol is more selfless, only taking on a path of self destruction, putting others at risk, when met with the unspeakable actions of Alpha. Carol is older though, with greater life experiences. She truly lives in the end times, without magic, without superheroes. Her losses are enormous, her suffering excessive.

Willow's journey was always a difficult one for me to watch, even in retrospect with the passage of time. She wanted to escape many of the quirky and endearing qualities which accompanied an awkward and less self assured version of herself, and that was her right. In order to shed some of the pain of her past, she needed to lose an entire version of herself.

8. Finally, both women have such an enormous capacity to love, a desire to protect their loved ones, against all odds. Often putting themselves at risk to do so. They were both selfless and selfish at times, utterly human, beautiful, and I love them for it.

[madara-fate]

Ok he loves them since it's canon , but the way decade long absence no contact , not even thinking whether his daughter would be upset with his absence , this dude really is devoted to his mission . Sure he is a blessed soul , but idk he has rinnegan , why didn't he teleport once in idk even 5 months , or atleast to see his wife

, Sakura had to intercept message from the hokage to chase him and locate him to be in a relationship with him ???? He has zero contact with Sakura on his missions ?

If someone with a space time ninjutsu could be absent for a decade it is just so fucked up

You have to admit kishi made some big mistakes in gaiden while writing their story .

I'll ask u one qs " Can u actually imagine sasuke cuddling Sakura " ? Like fater they are married making the first move ? You know this proves a lot of my point

I don't deny atleast now that he loves them and needs to stay away for those long ass missions not because he wants to ? but their writing lacks depth atleast considering the problems they were given .

I agreed with your point u have to agree with mine

Bro has rinnegan !!!

Ok he loves them since it's canon , but the way decade long absence no contact , not even thinking whether his daughter would be upset with his absence , this dude really is devoted to his mission . Sure he is a blessed soul , but idk he has rinnegan , why didn't he teleport once in idk even 5 months , or atleast to see his wife

Because as I've stated before (which you alluded to at the beginning of this conversation), Sasuke took his secrecy too far, and he mistakenly thought that Sakura would be enough for Sarada growing up. Once he saw the negative impact his absence had on Sarada, he acknowledged his mistake and owned up to it.

That's why during the scene below, Sasuke wouldn't allow Sakura to take the blame for how upset Sarada was:

Because as he said, he knew the fault was his.

Sakura had to intercept message from the hokage to chase him and locate him to be in a relationship with him ???? He has zero contact with Sakura on his missions ?

Again, that's a completely baseless assumption on your part. Nowhere does it say or imply that Sakura intercepted a message meant for Naruto, and then used that to locate him. Not least because while he was on his journey, none of them knew where he was; he'd always keep his location a secret. None of them knew where he was during any of the Hiden novels because he didn't tell them. Therefore, it's as I always say - There's no way Sakura would have been able to find Sasuke if he didn't let her know where he'd be beforehand, because he could have literally been anywhere in the world. Because here's something you're forgetting - Sasuke returned to the village during Sasuke Shinden's conclusion, so he therefore spent time with Sakura in person before returning to his travels. Meaning he would have had plenty of time to tell her where he would be, in the event that she wished to join him later. No interception of messages meant for other people, is necessary here.

If someone with a space time ninjutsu could be absent for a decade it is just so fucked up

Firstly, it wasn't a decade. Secondly, I've already explained that Sasuke acknowledged his mistake.

You have to admit kishi made some big mistakes in gaiden while writing their story.

I will admit that a lot of the things he wrote in Gaiden were wholly unnecessary and done solely for cheap drama, but they still made sense in terms of at least being possible. But yes, Kishi could have reached the same conclusion using other, much better routes.

I'll ask u one qs " Can u actually imagine sasuke cuddling Sakura " ? Like fater they are married making the first move ? You know this proves a lot of my point

Well considering they've had sex, I can imagine Sasuke doing far more than just cuddling with her, because we know as a fact that they have done far more than that. I know what you're getting at - Sasuke isn't the cuddly type, nor is he one to engage in overt public displays of affection, but that obviously doesn't mean that his love and affection for his family is any less deep or sincere.

I don't deny atleast now that he loves them and needs to stay away for those long ass missions not because he wants to ? but their writing lacks depth atleast considering the problems they were given.

The writing for literally every single canon couple lacks depth, because the romance was never a focus to begin with. The platonic bonds had far more narrative significance than the romantic ones did, so relative to other stories where the romance was actually a focal point, then yes their writing lacked depth. But this is certainly not a criticism that is exclusive to Sasuke and Sakura.

Ig if you go by that logic , then yeah he loves them and he had to stay away for that mission , not because he wanted to . However , the fact he forgot his daughters face and tried to threaten her is such an embarrassing moment . He didn't recognise his own blood ?????

I'm not going to get into that topic here, but I explained in great detail during this post, why it actually made sense that Sasuke reacted in that manner when he was first reunited with Sarada.

A decade long !!! How can a father go without his contact of his daughter , ig he really is devoted to his mission and the safety of this world , he is a good person and great soul but the fact that his absence never made him realise how his daughter would be suffering ???

To reiterate - he acknowledged his mistake, and owned up to it.

Sure he loves them "now" but the way they came about with the whole glasses plot and absence and skr intercepting messages from hokage to chase his location makes my head hurt .

Again, Sakura intercepting messages meant for the Hokage in order to chase Sasuke down, did not happen.

You have to admit loving sasuke is very hard work , and the results aren't that special apart from his looks ofc , because he is very awkward.

"Apart from his looks"? My goodness. Anon, Sasuke is one of the most respected figures in the entire Naruto universe right now, he is literally hailed as a village hero. Sakura is proud of what he is doing and she supports him wholeheartedly because she knows that he risks his life everyday to protect everyone in the village. What on earth has looks got to do with anything? Loving Sasuke is easy, because Sakura knows he has a heart of gold, and that he wouldn't hesitate to risk his life for their sake.

I think I'll end the conversation there, geez. I mean honestly come on, "apart from his looks"? Give Sasuke the credit he deserves.

[tjodity]

GOD IF YOU HAVE ANY COCONUT WINS IDEAS I WOULD LOVE TO BEAR TJEM SO BADLY I WOULD KILL SOMEONE

UM. YES. I have so many fics to try and write in the month of march but i've got writers block so im not really procrastinating so I will talk abt this!!! Some ideas:

-Okay so the big important first change is that Fundy's voter fraud can't be proven. The numbers are still suspicious, but nobody can prove that they were tampered with. COCONUT2020 beats POG2020 and SCHLATT2020+SWAG2020 in a massive landslide.

-Schlatt never lets this go from the second he hears it. he knows in his bones that he was cheated. Niki is on an edge of not being able to make a sure decision about it. Quackity, George, Tubbo, and Tommy are all fairly pissed about it.

-Losing the election to his son and his first lady fully fucks up Wilbur. He mumbles congratulations and then fully leaves L'Manberg to go off into the woods and build like. a house. imagine how he was in pogtopia but he has no one to fight and no one to talk to and no justifiable reasons to himself to be upset at all.

-Fundy and Niki become co-presidents. Niki appoints Tommy as L'Manberg's scout so he has an excuse to try and find Wilbur. With no exiles, no dictatorship, and no underground rebellion L'Manberg has a lot of people who don't see eye to eye and can say what they want.

-opposing political parties form pretty soon after. Schlatt, Quackity, and Tubbo form a party on the basis of preserving L'Manberg's integrity, making it a better place to live, and integrating more with the SMP. This is referred to as the Opposing Party but I'm sure if it was real lore it would have a very stupid name. Niki, Fundy, George, and Karl end up in a looser party focused on getting an upper hand in ongoing external conflicts and maintaining L'Manberg as a cohesive unit. This is referred to as the Presidential Party. Hbomb stays relatively neutral and Tommy tries to play negotiator. I'm not sure which side Ponk would be swayed towards.

-Niki and Schlatt sort of come up as the biggest political figures. Fundy gets increasingly weird and reclusive as time goes on and Quackity handles a lot of the actual logistics of running L'Manberg. Fighting an uphill battle with a team of people keeps Schlatt a lot more grounded than he was in Manberg. Niki on the other hand is fucking panicking because she feels like she's been dragged into a set of beliefs she doesn't really agree with but she doesn't really know how to keep everything moving. She tends to go towards fairly straightforward and firm answers to problems which keeps pushing her towards militarization.

-Dream doesn't really get a chance to be a villain, at least to the extent he is in the main story. The result of 2nd Era L'Manberg politics is that the country is expanding quickly and acting with sporadic violence with no predictable diplomatic policy, which is a nightmare for him. He ends up resolving that L'Manberg is a much more pressing issue than the disc conflict and devotes a lot of his time to normal diplomacy. Also due to the different position of Schlatt he never hears about the Revival Book.

-Tommy and Dream could actually resolve their issues a little here. Tommy is the only L'Manbergian trying to soften conflicts between the parties and also spends a lot of his time out in the SMP as a scout. He's also lost a lot of confidence in most of his friends and mostly wants everything to calm down. There wants align enough for them to partially work together and I think that at this point they could reasonably figure out their shit.

-Sapnap becomes a much bigger threat. Coconut winning basically resulted in the country of L'Manberg becoming his enemy. I don't think he'd get as fucked up as Dream did but he was also a pretty violent person to begin with and I could see him both escalating and broadening the conflict.

-I don't have a lot more ideas I can remember than that! Some more may come to me but I think it's fascinating! Take some very quick drawings

[sapphiredhearts-a]

lore / early life

please read my twilight wolf lore written in my jacob black headcanon here .

paul lahote was born into a family who looked perfect on the outside . they were the typical all-american family in a beautiful house in the suburbs . his dad was a former athlete who had gone off to college on a football scholarship and met the picture - perfect cheerleader . they were engaged and married before they graduated and paul's mother , grace , fell pregnant before she could get her degree . paul's father , john , stayed in school and finished his degree - becoming an accountant who made a good living and was able to move the family to tacoma

everything was . . . fine until paul was eight . his father had a temper from the beginning and pushed his mother into being what he thought was the perfect housewife . he never got physical with paul's mother , but the pressure was hard on her and she never seemed to get things right . she had dreamed of being a lawyer , not a stay at home mom and started to distance herself from john and paul as time went on . on paul's eighth birthday he woke to disaster - his mother had fled to her parent's house and demanded a divorce . john told him that she never tried to fight for any of them and had abandoned paul . despite not believing him at first , paul eventually accepted this version of events as truth and vowed to live up to his father's expectations so he didn't end up like grace .

it wasn't long before john moved paul away from tacoma - uprooting his young life even more . they went back to john's hometown of la push , a place john had said he'd never return to . but he had gotten offered a spot on the tribal council and declared it would be a good move . he could work from home out of a base in port angeles and devote more time to paul . paul thought perhaps things would turn around . he was wrong .

john was a pusher . he pushed paul to be perfect in all aspects of life - no matter how much it killed paul . paul had to join every sport he could , ace all of his classes , and always be seen with the "right" kind of people . he hated the popularity that came with being a jock . the other kids could never really relate to him because he could never be up front about his home life . there were times when john would get violent when paul didn't meet expectations but paul internalized it thinking if he had just been better it wouldn't have happened . he wouldn't leave his father like his mother had done , wouldn't give up on him . besides , he had nowhere else to go .

to everyone else - they were perfect . people adored john , especially after he joined the council . he would rant about how he hated not being higher up in ranks but he still went to every meeting and tried to make his opinion heard . the people of the reservation thought that john was the epitome of a good father . he had taken on being a single dad so well , after all . they would have never guessed what was going on behind closed doors . john was a charmer , for sure .

one thing john was very adamant about when paul was growing up was that paul would learn about the tribal legends . paul didn't think the legends were real , but unlike the other guys he came to know later , paul wished that they were . he wanted the strength that the shape-shifters of the legends possessed , the power . so he held onto every word that his father told him .

when he finally phased , paul was ecstatic to be a wolf . he had done so in a fit of anger after a fight with his father - luckily he had been alone so no one got harmed and sam happened to be on patrol to explain everything to him . paul took it in stride and adjusted quickly - happy to leave his friends and old life behind . he thought his father would be upset he had to quit sporst to avoid detection but he didn't seem to care . he only wanted paul to be the best wolf of the pack .

a few things bothered paul in his new state . for one , he had more trouble than the others controlling his emotions . sam theorized it came from unresolved trauma from his home life ( paul couldn't block them out of his thoughts and therefore sam & jared knew more about him than anyone - creating a close friendship between the three ) but paul refused to believe that . his father had only wanted the best for him . still , he struggled with his explosive anger . after sam hurts emily , paul tries harder to gain control of his emotions and even goes to classes for it - but he struggles every day .

another problem was that paul had been quite popular before transitioning . nobody knew why he had suddenly disappeared for weeks and when he came back seemed to leave everything behind - including a girl he had been seeing . paul refused to give explanations and was instead seen with sam & jared - fueling for the first time the "cult" rumors around la push .

[l3m0ngal5]

Stayed gone but it's Benny and Abigail with Abigail as vox

Abigail :That Idiots is back!

regenerzard: Yeah, I thought he was gone for good, too

Abigail : After what he done

regenerzard: You still pissed he almost beat you that time?

Abigail: Uh, shut up

Juregenerzard: Just sayin'

Abigail: Things have changed a lot since he left town

regenerzard: That's for sure

Abigail:I gotta send a message of who's really in charge of things now. Welcome home. I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone. Say hello to a new status quo. Everyone knows that there's a brand-new dawn. Turn the TV on! (Camera speeds, rollin' in three, two) Top of the hour, and we're discussing a certain has-been. Who has been spotted cavorting around town (welcome to the show) After a seven-year absence, did anybody miss him? (Welcome to the show) Did anybody care More on tonight's program So, benny sharp is back in town Why is he hanging around? What does that mean for The Organisation Well handily, I've got good news He's a loser, He's awful and I don't mean to sound hostile But the Man is Just a coward! You can take that as gospel Pulling my Hero? Impossible! We're visual, he's barely audible Stop givin' him the time of day Don't listen to a word he'd say I hope he had a nice vacay But he should've stayed away While he hid in Techno We pivoted to Hero Now his medium is gettin' bloody rare It's been better since he split Where's he been? Who cares, that's it

Benny : What's. to be back on the air. Yes, I know it's been a while Since someone with style treated You to broadcast So now, rejoice!

Abigail "what a Stupid voice

Benny:Instead of a Rule Upsest mediocre Business lady

Abigail:Come on!

Benny: Is Abby insecure? Pursuing allure? Flitting between this fad and that, is nothing's working?

Abigail: Ignore his chirping!

Benny: Every day, he's got a new format

Abigail: You're lookin' at the future, he's the shit that comes before that!

Benny: she as strong as he purports Or is it based on his support? SHe'd be powerless without the her Devotes

Abigail: Oh, please!

Benny: here's the sugar on the cream She asked me to join his team.

Abigail:Hold on!

Benny: i said no, and now he's pissy, that's the tea

Abigail: You old-timey prick I'll show you suffering

Benny: Uh oh, your TV is buffering!

Abigail: I'll destroy you, you little–

Benny: I'm afraid you've lost your signal Let's begin I'm gonna make you wish that I'd stayed gone Tune on in when I'm done Your status quo will know its race is run Oh, this will be fun

Abigail oh no

[tieflingtareon]

My love, are you the devil? (Oh, call me a devil)

Chapter 29 | Words: 7k

Summary: Astarion found himself often surprised by his heroic companion. He had one goal. To become the favoured companion of the group, to earn the Tieflings loyalty, to make Tar'eons strength his own. Yet Tar'eon isn't like the usual target of his manipulations. Despite his naivety, he does not seem gullible. There is something very wrong with their 'leader' to begin with. Astarion isn't sure if he wants to control it or eradicate the threat it posed. But can he really do either when Tar'eon himself seems so...unwaveringly kind?

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50668558/chapters/127995079

As per usual, their evenings were never lacking in activity. He hadn't thought he'd be able to sway Lae'zel from her love of Vlaakith, from her devotion to her cause, but all he had to do was show her the truth. He wormed his way into Vlaakith's mind and stole it from her, showed Lae'zel what truly awaited her if she allowed herself to kneel to her Queen. He honestly felt bad for her. After so long dedicating herself to the cause, after being called a traitor and hunted, she had been abandoned. She put her foot down and refused to let Vlaakith have her devotion any longer.

Her new purpose was to free Orpheus. Tar'eon wasn't sure how they would do it, not without consequence to themselves, but...he wanted to support her where he could. Even if her people abandoned her, she would would always a family in their merry group of misfits. Tar'eon would not let her walk the world alone if she chose to stay in Faerun once their journey ended.

He didn't mentioned the deal that Raphael spoke of about the Orphic Hammer, only because he didn't want her to barge ahead and do something she'd regret while her emotions were still heightened. She was obviously sadden by all that transpired, and he felt awful for her. She needed time to process before he dropped that information on her. When the time came, they'd find a way to free Orpheus, if that was truly the right thing to do.

After some back and forth, Tar'eon agreed to take Astarion, Shadowheart and Jaheria with him. He was hoping that they'd find a lead on this 'Minsc' Jaheria spoke of if she was along with them to point them in the right direction. When they arrived back at Wyrm's Crossing, Tar'eon looked up at the sky and hoped he wasn't running late to the coronation. Even if he was, he was hoping to catch the man before he left.

Tar'eon was surprised by how many places he could get into purely by pulling out his flute. And not in the metaphorical sense. He honestly didn't think it would work when he told the Flaming Fist guard that he needed to be there for the coronation, insisting he was a part of the band.

That's all it had taken before she ordered for the bridge to come down. To let them in. Tar'eon bowed his head in respect to her, false as it was, and strode forward into the fortress. He needed to speak with Enver, sooner rather than later. If Orin and him really had had a falling out, it could be used to their advantage, regardless of his own selfish wants.

He knew he'd get an earful from Karlach later, not bringing her along, but...He didn't want her to see him. He couldn't tell if he was doing it for her sake or his own. Maybe both. Enver had sent her to the Hells, and she had been an unwilling soldier for ten long years because of him. Tar'eon could image how much it might hurt to see him. Seeing Orin had made his blood boil, and it wasn't something he looked forward to, knowing he had to kill her when every time he saw her face he was surged with intense emotion that felt like physical pain. He didn't like knowing he had to kill his own sister, blood related or not, but she was dangerous. She was racking up a body count he couldn't let get any higher.

Tar'eon wasn't sure what he'd do just yet when he saw Enver. But he needed answers about his past, and he was the only link that wasn't looking to outright murder him. Hopefully. That was still up for debate.

"Halt." They were stopped by one of the many Steel Watchers, and he pursed his lips, hand on the hilt of his sword, should he need it. "We do not know how you gained entry, but your trespass shall not be punished. Lord Gortash has been expecting you."

Tar'eons eyes widened. He had? He'd tried to be discreet but...with those robots all over the city, he supposed it was hard to be unknown. If Enver did know his face well, he had probably picked him out of the crowd in moments after he arrived at Wyrm's Crossing. The Steel Watcher gave a creak and shuddered to a halt, before he seemed to regain life anew. This presence was different from the robots. Confident, domineering, hegemonistic - it was familiar.

"Greetings, old friend." The voice was definitely non-mechanical. Human. This was Enver. "Orin told me you were on your way here, but I scarcely believed her. Welcome back to Baldur's Gate - welcome home." He spoke warmly, which surprised Tar'eon. Had he been...waiting for him?

"Allow me to formally invite you to my inauguration. Make your way to the ceremonial hall." Like that, Enver's presence disappeared, the robot taking back it's watchful position.

"A personal invitation from the Lord himself...We shouldn't have any more trouble from the guards." Tar'eon noted as they walked deeper inside. A guard gestured to the door for him and he frowned. Something made him pause.

This moment...It actually felt wrong to invite them. He was visiting an 'old friend' after all. And if he had anything to say about him being a Bhaalspawn...It might ruin everything. He'd rather tell them all himself. Tonight. He swore, tonight would be the night he told them everything. Once Enver told him the missing details...he'd be able to tell them who he was. They deserved that much.

"I...I think you guys should stay here." Tar'eon finally said, and there was an instant protest.

"What? You want us to just stay here while you have an idle chat to one of the Dead Three's Chosen?" Astarion scoffed. "Absolutely not."

"It would be dangerous, going in alone. What if it's a trap?" Shadowheart protested.

"The cleric is right. You could be walking into your death. You'll need us." Jaheria crossed her arms, eyes narrowed.

"Look, I...I need to do this alone. I swear, I will explain everything tonight, but this? This is my journey, my quest, and I need to take it alone. Whatever he has to say, whatever he can give me on Orin, I need to hear it, without you three looking menacingly as possible behind me. It'll look less suspicious if I go alone."

"And if it's a trap?" Astarion reminded him of that concern and he sighed.

"If it's a trap, I'll set a fireball, and you'll hear it. Okay?" The three didn't look happy about it, but Astarion sighed and relinquished first.

"Fine. I know...you remember him. From before. If only a little bit. You deserve your reunion. I just hope you don't get stabbed in the back when I'm not there to protect it."

"I'll be fine." He promised and stepped forward to kiss Astarion softly. "I promise. Though, it is cute when you worry for me."

"Ugh, don't call me cute, I'm not a pet."

"I'll be back soon as possible, ph myirz." He kissed his cheek and turned to the women. "I promise, you will hear if it's a trap. I don't go down quietly."

"Go, before I change my mind." Shadowheart scowled.

"I admire your desire to grill Gortash yourself, but do not be reckless." Jaheria warned. "We will keep watch, should an ambush come for you."

"Thank you." Tar'eon smiled and made his way inside. Alone. Through the doors, was an open room. Almost like a waiting room. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Mizora. He scowled. His blade thirsted for the cambion's blood after all she had done to Wyll.

"If it isn't little Wyll's chum. I hope he hasn't been too much trouble." She mused. "I heard about his father. The Dead Three's puppet - a travesty, really. He's upstairs in Wyrm's Rock, ordaining Gortash as Archduke." Tar'eon scowled. He hated how casually she spoke of such things, with her false tone of woe over Duke Ravenguard.

"A splendid little shindig, I hear, perfect for crashing. Go on - we'll talk after. And bring the pup along if you can. I'd hate for him to miss the fun." She laughed and Tar'eon snarled at her, forcing himself to keep walking, lest he strike her down and damn both her and Wyll's soul to Avernus. In six months time though, he'd gladly remove her head himself. Though, he should leave the honour for Wyll.

He travelled up the tower of stairs until he reached the top.

It occurred to him now that he had never seen the man close up before. Not his real person at least. A mirage was different. He stalked his way down the red carpet embroidered with gold, his eyes on Enver as he approached, only to be halted by another Steel Watcher.

"Stand down, villain. In the name of the Steel Watch." Tar'eon wouldn't lie, he found it a touch ironic that he was the one being proclaimed a villain. "Aggressive action will not be tolerated in the presence of the patriars of this proud city." It stomped as if to scare him, but honestly? It looked foolish, and kind of made him want to laugh.

"Point taken. I'll keep things peaceful." He raised his hands in surrender, hoping it would let him pass so he could finally get a word in with Enver.

"The Steel Watch appreciates your cooperation, citizen."

"Dearest patriars, but a moment." Enver's voice called his attention, and he raised his head to meet his gaze. "I must greet a most honoured guest." Tar'eon watched him come down the stairs with heavy steps, yet somehow he managed to make them look graceful despite the clomp of his steel toes. Where those...devils on his shoes?

"Crawling back from his bloody disgrace - it's my favourite assassin! Gods, you're a sight for sore eyes." Enver definitely to managed to make his favouritism known by his tone alone. Any booming novelty in his voice died down as he came to stand before him, shadowed eyes having a shine to them that Tar'eon couldn't remember seeing last time in the illusion created by the Emperor.

"Orin told me she made a fool of you, but I should've known you wouldn't go down that easy." Enver looked him over, and Tar'eon couldn't decipher what he was looking for. The stone, wounds from his tell tale 'death', the prism - he wasn't sure.

"So you do know me." Tar'eons heart was thumping so hard he could barely breathe, and he hated how weak the words came out. The air itself was ripe with tension, and he wasn't sure who was going to attack first, but it felt like the kind of tension that broke when it snapped. "Your 'favourite assassin'?"

Enver's eyes widened.

"Then she didn't lie." He smiled, looking away as he spoke, like he was thinking of his words even as he spoke them, deciding just how to twist each one perfectly to get what he wanted. A politician through and through. "The past is lost to you. Let me clear up some mysteries, then. We share so much history."

He was looking at him now, that shine only growing brighter, like being able to tell their story in his own words was the highest honour.

"You and I initiated this plot. We discussed in depth the failures of our predecessors and how to avoid them." Tar'eons stomach sank as he spoke. "We understood that if we were to unite, no one could stand in the way of the Dead Three."

His worst nightmare was true. He had been a part of this. This whole scheme - he's been the co-leader of it all. Orcastrating the downfall of humanity. He hadn't the faintest clue until now. Enver was giving it all to him on a silver platter, explaining the creation they made together.

"So unite we did." His voice was soft, almost warm at the memory of their union. Like it had been something special, working together to enslave Faerun. "First we obtained the crown; then we enslaved the brain. From there, it was but a small step to the most successful religious hoax ever perpetrated."

"What was my role in this plan?" Tar'eon asked, unable to stop himself. Enver had all the answers he needed at the tip of his tongue, and Tar'eon yearned for them. He wanted to know all of it - where Astarion may hunger for power, Tar'eon hungered for the past to be returned to him, no matter how foul or bloody. There was no peace for him until he knew everything. He hungered for knowledge, for truth.

"In Bhaal's name, you set your bloody daggers to cause panic in the streets, killing in the Absolute's name." He sounded proud, like that part of the plan had been his own idea. Maybe it had. "You would have carried out that part of the plan, at least, had Orin not ruined your hard work." Was that...Gods. Was Enver actually disappointed Orin had gotten rid of him? Or perhaps he simply didn't want to deal with Orin alone. She didn't exactly seem...stable.

"Next, the threat of the Absolute's monstrous armies formed by Myrkul's general, Ketheric Thorm. In such circumstances, people crave strong leaders. Leaders that bring law, order and protection. Leaders like me, Bane's unyielding hand, author of justice." He was so pleased with him, and Tar'eon felt a tickle of pride in his chest. He squashed it down. He would not feel pride for this man's crimes against the Coast.

"You are soon to witness the people of Baldur's Gate granting me complete power over them. All out of fear of the Absolute." He was telling him thing he didn't really need to know, he noticed. Sure, it was a refresher in some ways, but Enver was discussing all of the plan with such ease, like Tar'eon was not technically his enemy.

"The faithful will do anything in the name of their god." He smiled knowingly, and Tar'eon had a feeling he was referring to them as much as the citizens. Tar'eon also noticed that his eyes weren't blue or black, but rather murky brown that almost looked green at the same time. It was hard to tell with his smudged shadow and his eyebags. Was he getting enough sleep? He shouldn't care about such things, but he kind of did.

"It was all going so well - until you vanished. Orin informed us that henceforth she would speak for the temple of Bhaal, and act on their behalf. But she...she made a mess of things." A possessive anger flickered to life inside at his words. Orin took Father's temple for herself after trying to discard him - he'd have her head. He closed his eyes, willing the Urge to quiet down within him. They would have her blood. But it would not be for Father's sake. It would be for the people.

"Unlike you, she cannot control herself."

"You're mistaken if you think I can control myself." It took everything in him to keep himself in control at all times, but it was a waning battle when it came to Orin. Something about her drew the madness out of him. The desire to murder in cold blood - his kin be damned. He wasn't sure if it was his past life's will, his Urges, or Father's.

"Have you gone soft? I find that hard to believe. One's true nature always rises to the top." He gazed at him, and Tar'eon stared back, waiting for him to continued. It seemed to take him a moment, pulling his gaze down to his gauntlet as he spoke again.

"When Ketheric fell, I feared for the worst. That our plans would fail like so many before. Because of discord among ourselves." How many? Tar'eon furrowed his brows. How long had they known each other? How many plans had they made and then discarded or failed to see through? Argued over for hours? Or had the discord...been purely about Orin, about others, rather than them?

Every question Enver answered, it was like three more appeared. It was never ending.

"Now you've returned, we can achieve all our dreams still. You brought Thorm's Netherstone." Tar'eon quirked a brow. He didn't intend to hand it over, as charming as Enver was trying be. "You know, it takes all three to control the brain." He raised his arm, the purple stone in his golden gauntlet thrumming with power. The stone in his pocket reacted in turn, and he reached into it to grasp it tight.

"Without Thorm's," He lowered his arm, his eyes seeming to ask for his generosity of all things. "It's becoming vexingly wilful. The quakes are a clear warning." The earthquakes. He knew it to be common in some areas, but according to his friends who remembered Baldur's Gate well, it wasn't common here.

"If nobody steps in soon, it'll free itself from the authority of the crown. I expect it'll start with turning the Sword Coast's infected - you among them. That Prism of yours won't last indefinitely." At the mention of it, it glowed gently, and he pursed his lips. It's magic would last as long as Orpheus remained in his prison, but how long would that last? How long until the Emperor was defeated? Until the Gith freed him? What would he do when time came to free Orpheus himself? Was there the possibility of waiting until the brain was defeated before he could free the man?

All those people...if they didn't get control of the elder brain soon, it wouldn't just be his neck on the line. He had to make this right - and that required all the Netherstones. The only problem was he wasn't sure if he could handle all three by himself. The three Chosen had split the control between themselves for a reason - would controlling all three stones has adverse effects? Was it even possible for someone like?

"Next, the Grand Design. The mind flayer empire reborn. If we're lucky, we'll become slaves. If we're unlucky, well..." They'd have their brains eaten by the mind flayers, no doubt. Not a lovely way to go. He didn't like the idea of slavery either though, and neither did Enver, he was sure. "A bleak prospect. But it's a fate that can be avoided if you and I renew our old partnership."

Tar'eon looked at Enver with a small frown, unsure. This was the man who sold Karlach to Zariel. Who showed no mourning for Ketheric's death. Who tadpoled Wyll's father. He shouldn't trust him as far as he could throw him. Which...actually, he could probably throw him a good distance, but that was against the point.

"Together, we can still restore authority over the brain."

Tar'eon shook his head.

"I'm not the person I once was. I've changed. I'm not siding with you - I can't side with you." What would they think of him, taking on this alliance? Was his friends trust really worth getting his memories back? Getting answers?

"Bhaal isn't done with you, you must know that. You have effortless talents, killing instinctually like you breathe blood." Enver insisted. "Stand with Bhaal, or it will spell your doom. But I can offer some aid for the storm you are about to weather."

Fuck. Enver had a point. If they lost control of the elder brain...it would spell their collective doom. He had to think smart. He'd rather lose his friends trust then see them turned into illithids or a meal for them. He felt like he was making a deal with the devil; he certainly spoke like he had been around them his whole life, learning their tricks. If he wasn't so obviously human, Tar'eon would have taken him as a cambion in disguise.

"You should hear him out." The Emperor encouraged and Tar'eon grimaced.

"With Ketheric gone, Orin proves treacherous. She wants the Netherstones for herself." Go figures that the mad woman, Bhaal's spawn would want all the power of annihilation for herself. "She only cares for blood. And your blood and mine are of particular interest to her."

"If she wants my blood, she'll have to try and take it." Tar'eon said through clenched teeth. He wanted to rip her spine out through her mouth. "I'd like her to try killing me again; she won't be so lucky this time."

"How bloodthirsty you still are." Enver smiled, looking almost fond. "Orin changes shape faster than you and I change clothes. You know. She's tricked you before." Tar'eon frowned, trying to remember.

He couldn't remember exactly how he'd been taken by her. The only memory he had prior to the torture, the pod, was standing in a dim office, his flute covered in blood from his slippery fingers. A haunting tune. In his memories, someone had entered the room, but there hadn't been blond hair or skin-tight carnage as a suit. Orin had tricked him before, and she had been wearing the flesh of another. Who, he couldn't remember.

"She's targeted me as well," Enver admitted and hot anger pulsed inside him, pumping hotter with every thump of his heart. He would kill her slowly. "I'm well protected, but she's extremely good at what she does. If Orin obtains all three Netherstones, she'll plunge the Coast into chaos and paint the city in blood." He actually sounded upset at the very idea, which struck Tar'eon as odd. Was that not his intention in the end? To wreck havoc on the Coast?

"I can't let that happen. I want to lead this city to glory - not scorch its earth." Tar'eons eyes widened. It finally connect in his mind. Enver wasn't looking to annihilate humanity. Sure, he was bending people to his whim, using a false religion to guide them, but he was doing this specifically to gain himself power. To become the ruler of the city, rather than the enemy of it. The Steel Watch - they were his eyes and ears, and he was keeping the city on edge so when he struck, and he 'saved' them, they would love him. They would adore the ground he walked on, even in his tyranny, if only because he would be the saviour of Baldur's Gate.

Tar'eon could use this to his advantage. Having Enver in his pocket, being able to roam freely without worrying about the Steel Watch - Hells, even with some negotiation, and he might be able to convince him to actually save the city.

"So I turn to you, the former ruler of the cult of Bhaal." He gestured to him, awaiting his respond, and Tar'eon licked his lips.

"It's going to take a lot to make me trust you." He warned. Enticing the man to work harder for his alliance. If he could do that, there may be real promise to this deal, that could serve the both of them.

"Let's make our pact anew. A divine oath, sworn upon spirit and flesh. I do no harm to you, nor you to me. Futhermore, you'll have nothing to fear from my Steel Watch while our pact stands." A smart choice of words, but Tar'eon could see he meant it. As long as he didn't strike first, neither would he. "Thorm's stone is yours to keep. When you slay Orin and take her stone, you bring it here, so the three are united once more."

He was making more and more promises, and Tar'eon was curious to how much he could make him promise before he refused.

"Together we rule Faerun as kings. No, more than kings - gods. We rule as the Absolute." He was offering the world on a platter, and if Tar'eon were a more selfish man, he'd take it. He was sure Astarion would if in his position, and he didn't know what that said about his taste in men. Probably something deplorable.

He grimaced as his head throbbed intensely, the Urge screaming from within, sick to it's stomach. It did not want to share. When the world came to it's end, it would be his, and his alone. In Father's name, he would destroy and leave nothing but ash.

But first...he may rule, before he ruins.

"Tir'yal." A hand grasped his shoulder as his headache diminished, and he rubbed his temple, his skull feeling tight.

"Headaches - I get them sometimes. It's nothing."

"You're fighting your urge. I can tell." Enver seemed amused. "I've seen you do it before, on occasion - but not nearly with so much struggle." He removed his hand, smiling at him.

"What do you say? Shall we be allies?" Tar'eon frowned before grimacing once more as another voice spilled into his mind. He was getting tired of thing infiltrating his brain.

"I can detect no deceit. This alliance could serve us well. And if it does not...well, we need not honour it." Enver did not move to comfort him this time, watching with curiosity as Tar'eon came back to himself.

"Well...?"

Tar'eon allowed his eyes to drift over the man, trying to decipher his body language, trying to gauge how much he could trust him. Enver widened his stance ever so slightly, blinking slowly at him, waiting patiently for his answer. Nothing in his stance shows restlessness or anxiety, not even a hint of aggressive. He was calm, confident. He had not spoken a single lie that whole time, even when Tar'eon knew lying was probably his favourite pass time.

He was promising a kingdom to him - and he meant it. What had he done in the past to be revered so highly by the man? A Chosen of Bane; he should not ever desire to share anything he owns, yet he offered it to him without any regard to the irony of it. It sounded much too good to be true as an offer, so he breathed out a detection spell, barely a whisper.

'Orin is unreliable. Tir'yal is back, and he shows far more promise than she ever did. He keeps his word, I keep mine. We will rule as one. He will remember all that was soon enough.'

Just as quickly as he made his way in, he was shut out, Enver giving him a dangerous look. He wasn't reprimanding him out loud though, so he couldn't have been too angry to find him slipping into his mind with such ease.

"You call you Tir'yal. Why?"

"That is your name." Enver said, gesturing to the man before him. "You are Tir'yal."

"You say it like someone raised with an infernal tongue. That's what I don't understand." Tar'eon narrowed his eyes. "Nobody else calls me that. Only you. Not even Orin."

"There is much you don't remember, Tir'yal. It will come back to you, in time. I'm sure of it." Enver assured with a wave of his hand. "Do you accept our alliance, or not? I only have so much patience. I'm a busy man."

"Orin betrayed me, and you did nothing to help me then. What's changed?"

"We would not meddle in each other's affairs - this was our agreement. She came to us as Bhaal's Chosen. We are but servants to our lords. Your presence here means your lord sees a purpose for you yet. I tolerated Orin," He cracked a smile. "But I liked you."

"We must have been close, for you to use my infernal name." He remarked, and Enver shrugged.

"In some ways. You were the brilliance, and I was the genius. The brawn and the brain. You were the weapon, the perfect assassin, and I was the strategy, the one who got you to your targets. We worked well together." The fondness in his eyes spoke of a long, fruitful alliance, but perhaps also a deep friendship. Perhaps more than a friendship. But he did not want to think about such a thing right now.

"My word is my bond, Enver." He bowed his head low in respect. "We shall be allies, and Orin shall be dead." It surprised him when Enver bowed back, his golden hand with the stone coming to rest over his chest as he swore his allegiance in return.

"Then let it be writ by the Black Hand of Bane. I, Lord Enver Gortash, swear I shall do no harm. We will rise together over Toril as a roaring sun." He looked quite pleased to have him back at his side. "Let me demonstrate why you made the right choice." He smirked and Tar'eon quirked a brow.

"Your camp is compromised. One among you is an impostor. A Faceless." Tar'eon clenched his teeth, jaw flexing. Of course. Of course they had been infiltrated. It was just like Orin to pull something like that. "Who? I can't say. I'd suggest a thorough investigation - you'll find I speak the truth."

It hadn't even occurred to him that Enver might lie. He'd been completely honest with him so far. Or, as honest as a politician could be.

"The faceless in your camp is like a knife at your throat. Remove it, quickly, or any alliance between us would be exceedingly short-lived."

"Surely your Steel Watch can handle Orin. Why do you need me?"

"Orin is...elusive, shall we say. The grip of the Steel Watch may be tight, but sand still slips through its fingers." He didn't seemed to like admitting when he was bested by a woman who could be literally anyone at any given moment. "Some conflicts are best resolved quietly. The people are cattle: obedient until panicked."

"Then how am I supposed to find Orin if she can change her form so easily? You can't seem to find her." Tar'eon huffed.

"Even horror has a home. Find her nest, and slay her there. The Bhaal Temple, your old haunt, now reeks of her ichors." He paused, looking thoughtful. "Hmm...Do you even remember how to find it?"

"...No." Tar'eon admitted.

"A shame. It's a secret, even to me." He said it like he wasn't usually kept out secrets. That usually all he ever heard were things he wasn't supposed to know. He wondered if it vexed him, not knowing where the temple was. "You're resourceful - I trust you'll sniff it out. If the trail goes cold, follow the bodies."

Tar'eon hadn't meant to find it amusing, but the quip made him huff out the smallest laugh before he stifled it with a finger to his lips, clearing his throat. Enver smirked. Gods, he'd just stroked his ego big time, hadn't he?

"I should go." His friends were still waiting for him.

"Before you do, come witness as I make history as the first Archduke of Baldur's Gate." Tar'eon tried to think of a good enough excuse to leave, but if he was honest...he wanted to stay. He had so many things he still wanted to ask.

"I wouldn't dream of missing it." He decided, hoping that a little flattery might get him a little further with the man. He held so many secrets of the past in his head - and Tar'eon wanted to know them all.

"Then we proceed. The patrairs await." Enver smiled, like the cat that caught the canary, turning from him as Tar'eon stood to the side, watching him. Studying him.

"Distinguished dukes, patrairs. Dearest Ravenguard - I will heed your call. A new chapter begins." His voice took back on a booming quality, drawing others in. He spoke was such insincerity, it somehow came around full circle to become sincere.

He watched the man kneel, the blade falling upon each shoulder as he swore himself to the city and its people. He wondered how much truth was in each lie. When asked for consent to decree him Archduke, Tar'eon hesitated. Enver's gaze caught his from where he knelt on one knee, and Tar'eon found himself nodding softly. That blossom of pride he'd felt before reared its head once more. He shouldn't feel it, but he did. Like somehow Enver's achievement was his own.

Perhaps he wasn't his past self, but maybe he wasn't the ideal self he'd made either. Perhaps both the past and present held hands within him. He was no longer a bloodthirsty urge for the most part, and he wanted to deny Bhaal completely. Yet he was still drawn to these temptations. Wrath, greed, pride - he felt every sin, even if he tried to uphold every virtue.

Tar'eon looked at Enver as he approached.

"You, my honoured guest, will find me in my office above when you return. Do not come empty-handed." It was a warning as he passed by, but Tar'eon still reached out and grasped his arm, pulling him back. Enver's eyes widened, looking up at him with a rather disgruntled expression.

"I have things I want to discuss with you."

"We can talk when you bring me the stone."

"You asked me to rule with you. Am I not entitled to a conversation at the very least? Sounds like a bothersome partnership in my opinion, if it lacks communication.” Enver chuckled and removed the hand from his bicep, his hands curling around wooden railing behind the tiefling, trapping him between wood and his own body.

“You know enough. You may know more when you bring me Orin’s Netherstones.” He assured and Tar’eons heart thundered in his chest at the sudden closeness.

“I…you-“

“I made our deal very clear. Get me the Netherstone, and then maybe…we can sit down for a spot of wine. Hm? Like old times.” He wanted to ask more, to know more, impatient to learn it all, but he didn’t get the chance to beg before a hand shoved the Archdukes chest hard. Astarion stood between them, red eyes narrowed.

“It’s quite rude to back another’s lover against a wall, my friend. You could have at least asked me first. I might have wanted to watch.” Astarion drawled.

“Astar, it’s okay.” Tar’eon stood straighter, lips thinned. “We…we’ve made a deal. I pushed a boundary. It’s only fair he retaliate.” He could see the way the Steel Watchers eyed them, and he wasn’t willing to put Astarion at risk.

“Bullshit.” Astarion glared at Enver who smirked.

“Tir’yal, I had no idea you had such a…possessive lover.” Enver glanced at the fang marks on his throat, having already made note of them prior. "And here I thought you were simply nibbled on before you slaughtered some pathetic spawn at that Flophouse." He had eyes and ears everywhere after all. He knew much more than he let on about the city and it's citizens.

“Tir’yal?” Astarion butchered the name and Tar’eon suppressed a wince, but the silent grimace was still caught by Enver who chuckled. “What was the deal?”

“It’s simple business. I get Orin’s Netherstone, and he doesn’t sick his Steel Watch on us while we go around the city. Okay?” He would tell him about the whole Absolute and Bhaalspawn mess later, when they finally had some privacy.

“Oh, there is so much more to our alliance than that, Tir’yal.”

“Who do you think you are?” Astarion sneered.

“Me?” Enver gestured to himself before shrugging. “Only the new Archduke of Baldur’s Gate. And Tir’yal, he…is my nearest and dearest. Despite the amnesia, not even he can deny we have a bond like no other.” Tar’eon knew he was riling Astarion up on purpose, but he didn’t know what to say. He was terrified of Enver telling Astarion his secret. That he was a Bhaalspawn. That he was behind all of this Absolute crap.

“Oh? Archduke? Lord Gortash, I’ve heard. You know, I’m something of a Lord-to-be myself. Perhaps I can join you with this ‘spot of wine’ you speak of?” Astarion gestured like a jester, mocking the man and his title in the most underhanded way possible.

Enver laughed, throaty and deep.

“You’re funny. Cunning too. I like that.” His smile morphed into a look of interest. “Seeing as we're such good pals, being as you’re in this alliance by extension of things - does he still enjoy that…” Enver gestured vaguely. “...thing with his tail?”

“W-what about my tail?” He wrapped the end of it around his ankle anxiously, the energy in the room crackling like lightning might strike any moment.

“Yes, please do elaborate. I’m afraid he enjoys many things that I do.” Astarion glared at the Chosen of Bane. Enver grinned and stepped closer, eyes full of mirth as he dared Astarion to place a hand on him again.

“Why tell when I can show? I find demonstration to be the most effective teacher.” Tar’eon stood stock still, unsure what to expect. He hadn’t expect Enver’s hand to wrap around the middle of his tail, trailing upwards to the protrusion where the base left the small of his back. His heart thumped in anticipation, waiting to see what he would do.

He gasped when Enver’s grip tightened around the base, tugging, his hand wrapping around the railing with a hard grip as the action pooled heat into his belly against his will. Enver's thumb smoothed over the ridges, pressing into the base of his spine before letting go like a gentleman, if he could even be called that, and stepping back with a grin. Tar'eon looked at Astarion and swallowed hard. If looks could kill, Enver would be nothing but gore on the floor.

“Ah…you’ve not learnt all his secrets yet." Enver smiled, and the look in his eyes could be mistaken for fondness if not for the devilish shine in them, and the slightest uptick further on the left corner of his mouth that almost made his smile a smirk. "What a shame. I’m afraid I’m a few years ahead of you in that regard.”

He used the tip of his golden talon to pick dirt out from under one of two of his unarmoured fingers, and Tar'eon didn't have a chance to stop Astarion before he launched at the man with his dagger, a feral look in his eyes.

Enver was faster than the vampire though, as if he'd been expecting the attack.

"Intonuit fluctus." In a thunderous wave of magic that made Tar'eons ears ache, Astarion was thrown across the hall. The vampire grunted as he landed on his back, his dagger lost from the impact. He cursed and made to stand as the Steel Watchers surrounded him.

"Astar!" Tar'eon ran to his aid, helping him onto his feet and drawing his blade. "You idiot, why would you draw a dagger on him?"

"He touched you - and didn't ask either." Astarion growled. "He acts like he has free reign to your body, why aren't you angry?"

"I- It's not a big deal to me, okay? But now we have a fight I'm not sure we can win right now." A clamber of footsteps came from the stairs and there Shadowheart and Jaheria stood, weapons brandished to help them. A Steel Watcher made to grab Tar'eon, and he swung his blade back, ready to take out its leg in hopefully one blow, but then, Enver spoke.

"Halt." The machinery shuddered to a stop, his hand inches from his head. His heart was racing. "You did something rather foolish, my friend. Do you think I'm a stranger to being attacked in my own home?" He was talking to Astarion. The vampire bared his fangs.

"We don't need your alliance. We'll take your stone and Orin's, and figure this all out on our own." Astarion snarled.

"Oh? Will you?" Enver's gaze slid over to Tar'eon, who was still holding his sword in a tight grip. He beckoned him forward, and Tar'eon feared moving in case the man would take the opportunity to harm Astarion. After a long pause, he stepped forward, his long sword still held in both hands as he came to stand before him.

Enver smiled.

"Tell me. Tell them," He gestured to his companions. "Where you stand in this alliance."

Tar'eon sucked his cheeks in and bit down. This was a good deal in front of him, for all of them. Even if Enver was a bit touchier than he should be. He had reacted on memory though, and even if he couldn't remember himself, his body did. It was probably the only reason he hadn't taken his head on instinct for touching his tail in such an indecent way.

"...I'll get you the stone. But they get to walk free with me. They are an extension of myself, which means you can't harm them as long as I don't harm you."

"If they're an extension of you, and your little vampling just attacked me, does that not nullify our prior agreement?" Enver was waiting for him to speak, to try and best this verbal contract despite knowing he'd trapped him. Tar'eon couldn't think of anything. He clenched his teeth and sucked on his canines in frustration. It vexed him, to let Enver win. Astarion was worth more than his pride though.

"...Please." He bit out, jaw flexing. Enver's eyes widened and he barked a laugh. He slapped his shoulder and shook his head.

"Oh, I'm disappointed you didn't threaten me with your blade."

"I still could if you'd prefer." Tar'eon meant it. I might not want to kill him, but he wouldn't mind making him bleed after that small humiliation.

"Now, now, I have enough enemies as it is. I'd much rather keep you an ally. As long as you keep your mad dog on it's leash." Enver narrowed his eyes at the vampire. "Not everyone can be an equal, you know? But there's promise in you, Tir'yal. If you learn never to utter a plea to an enemy again. Next time you do, I'll cut you down myself, to save you the embarrassment. Never bend the kneel to those below you."

He beckoned his Steel Watchers off and Astarion glowered at the Archduke, his anger roiling off him in waves.

"If we're equals, then I didn't bend the kneel to someone below me." Tar'eon sheathed his sword. Enver smiled, something akin to pride in his eyes.

"You're good at this. You pick apart every word you hear. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were a real devil." Enver huffed in amusement as he stepped around him. "Though, if you wish to plead to me, you need only ask. I can be generous with those I like."

Enver smirked at Astarion as he tugged on the end of Tar'eons barbed tail, the tiefling turning around sharply to free himself. He narrowed his eyes at the Archduke.

"Next time I see you, you better have that stone, Tir'yal." Enver left with that behind a slam of grand doors, leaving Tar'eon reeling. He curled his tail around his leg and shuddered out a breath.

The phantom hand on his throat gripped him tighter, and he knew this alliance with Enver only spelled trouble for him. He wasn't sure he'd be able to escape those golden claws once he was in them.

And he was in them.

[rinwellisathing]

You're Awful, I Love You: Part 10

Enver Gortash/Trans male Tiefling Durge

Dusk painted the sky beautifully as Sentry made his way back through the lower city on his way home. He considered returning to the temple directly, after all, Gabraela and Sceleritas were likely to be beside themselves if he'd been gone as long as he guessed he had. Jackal and Orin? Probably could care less, maybe even hoped he'd stay gone. Who ever knew what Tomi was thinking, so no guessing whether she cared or not, far more concerned with her face and her victims. But one thing stropped him from going directly for the sewer entry. A man bumped carelessly past him. Rude, but easy enough to ignore...except for a fascinating stoop to his figure. There was an ever so slight curve to his spine. Elegant, beautiful, and perfect for a sculpture piece Sentry had been agonizing over for months.

He changed direction to discreetly follow the man, his pace lazy and casual, stopping to buy a copy of the Gazette from an urchin or to stoop down and pet a stray cat. But he never let the man out of his sight. Sentry followed the man at a steady pace and easily deniable distance even after the sun had fully dipped below the waters of the sea.

The path brought them outside of a large building with a gated outdoor area littered with toys. A school? Sentry thought a moment and remembered, yes, the magic school for the little ones. Before they were old enough to be apprenticed. Some acolytes had spoken about attending in the past. It occurred to him to perhaps wonder why this might be the man's destination, but he fairly easily shook off the question. It hardly mattered, there were valuable materials that needed harvesting and as they passed by a fairly hidden alcove near the school, he struck.

He hated using anything but his halberd, he truly did, but he had been traveling light and a hatchet would have to do. He'd improvised before and he would have to improvise again, it was all part of his process. Before the man could realize how thoroughly doomed he was, his head was cleaved from his shoulders and his body collapsed to the ground like a fallen tree.

Sentry was about to begin harvesting, when he noticed a small, frightened figure, staring up at him with terrified blue eyes. A young Tiefling, maybe a few years younger than he was. She was short, her face freckled, her skin a shade of greyish blue that reminded him of the sharks that swam in the harbor. Her blonde hair was tied back in a simple braid and she was dressed in the robes of a junior magic teacher. He could see her hands just losing the glow of a person about to cast and sweat beading on her forehead.

“Oh.Was this your kill? Terribly sorry, but I need these parts for a project.” Sentry gave a crooked smile to the girl. “And anyway, your methods were sloppy. You'd have got caught. So really, I did you a favor. Now run along back to your little students, sweet girl. You're not cut out for this.”

The girl's mouth opened and closed for a moment like she was about to say something and then she simply bit her lip, shook her head, and turned, barely catching her breath before running back to the school.

“Amateurs. Fucking amateurs.” Sentry murmured to himself as he expertly flipped his skinning knife and began to work through the meat, flesh, and sinew to dig out the spine. As he shook his head at the thought of these wannabe killers making a mockery of his art, his eyes fell on the rib cage just barely peeking out from one of the incisions. “Hmm...More ribs would be good, perhaps a crown for my Muse.”

A smile played across his pretty mouth as he imagined his Tyrant crowned in bones, slumped in a throne of corpses, grin slit from ear to ear, emerald eyes bereft of life but caught eternally in a devoted gaze, Sentry's own lips smeared in blood from a final cold kiss.

Sentry felt his stomach churn with arousal and he hurried worked to extricate the ribs as well, wishing in the back of his mind that he had asked Sceleritas to tag along. Extrication could be so tedious, especially when taking care to keep the parts intact. Still, it wasn't a difficult task, one Sentry had done hundreds upon hundreds of times, after all. Soon he had finished and packed up his bag.

Footfalls sounded from the direction he had come, so with his work finished, Sentry dipped into the nearby alleyway, scuttling into the sewer entrance, but watching to see who came. Another young tiefling, male, but otherwise similar in coloration to the girl. This one was dressed in Flaming Fist armor, the armor of a new initiate, but still. He was flanked by two other men, a half-orc and another Tiefling, pretty small patrol. Sentry watched them talk for a moment, expecting them to call for aid, after all, his gruesome work should have required backup, yes? Surprise and mild insult crossed his face when no backup was called, however. Instead, the three packed up the body carefully and he watched as they dumped it in the harbor. A perfect waste of good meat and blood. Damn.

He only wondered for a moment what this strange breach in protocol was for before deciding he really didn't care all that much. Better a cover up than some massive manhunt that would result in having to lay low for a while. This way he could keep hunting, collect more pieces for his Tyrant's glorious crown. So what if some fist jackboots were too lazy to do their jobs? All the better for him.

He made his way through the slimy, reeking sewer tunnels towards the old ruins that held his home. His bag rattling with each step, laden with his prize from the evening. He stopped ever so briefly to crumble some bread from his pack for the rats that scurried around the sewers. Sentry liked rats. He liked most animals, honestly. Animals didn't deny their nature, animals didn't feign civility, everything was out in the open. More than that, animals were truer companions than many people, he recalled a time when rats were his only friends. It was a favor he felt he needed to repay.

The Tiefling took only a moment to watch the rats pick up the small pieces of sustenance and begin to munch at them, a brief smile crossing his face at the sight. With that done, he continued all the way down to the temple, crossing the threshold and stopping, crossing his arms with a bemused smirk as he witnessed the argument occurring below.

“And you didn't bother to look for him!? You gave our Chosen a location, a Banite hideout, and you didn't follow him!?” The tall female Tiefling was shouting at Jackal, scythe brandished in her strong hands as she circled him, her long stark white hair flowing behind her.

“I'm not the brat's keeper, Gabraela. And it's like you said, he's our Chosen, ain't he? I did as he asked. Maybe if you didn't kill your actual kid, you wouldn't have to mother hen this one so much.” The grey haired Drow sneered, circling the Tiefling and lazily flipping his daggers in his scarred hands.

“I did as father commanded! My husband and child were the sacrifice he asked, anyone here would have done the same!” The woman snarled.

“Not so reluctantly. My wife was an easy kill. Best fun I ever had.” Jackal snorted. “You don't see anyone else being so precious about their first murder and you don't see us using the little princeling as a way to play house neither!”

“Ahem! Entertaining as your squabbling is and as wonderful as a night of bloodshed would be, children, it seems our Lord of Carnage has returned home!” Sceleritas cut in from the sidelines, announcing Sentry's return.

“Thanks, Sceleritas, always pleasant to make an entrance.” Sentry raised up his arms dramatically as he descended the steps. “I just lost track of time, yeah? Painting is such a process after all. And it's as you said before, my sculpture garden is overdue for a new piece. I could hardly pass up the one I found.” He reached into his bag and produced the bloodied, crooked spine. “It'll really make my Slayer Stalking piece more realistic I think. A true nightmare come to life.” His sharp teeth glinted in a manic grin.

“Oh, that it will, my boy. That it will.” Sceleritas beamed with pride. “And now, my sanguine scion, you really ought to get some rest! You look exhausted and you know how your art vexes you when you're overtired.” The butler chastised, wagging a claw.

“Alright, alright. But if anyone tries to kill eachother, please wake me. I'd like to watch.” Sentry smirked, yawning and stretching as he made his way to his room.