#and i've changed a lot since it started.
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hey guys welcome back it's sephgen ❤️💜
#final fantasy vii#ffvii#sephiroth#genesis rhapsodos#sephgen#ay-ay-ay you would not believe#hey it's been a while since i've drawn these dudes#don't mind me putting my username for other places on the art because i refuse to consolidate <3#hey also#transmigrator genesis. think about it#i contemplate this could be very good for the storyline#hilarious and awful and wonderful#my concept: they come in when genesis is a little kid and an apple falls on his head#and from there things begin to change for the super banora bros...#and everyone else on gaea!!!! buahahaha#because genesis ensures that sephiroth gets lots of hugs!#and socialization!#and acceptance even if he's a bit freaky#or a lot#and then the training room incident happens... and genesis stars panicking because none of his devious plans are working#and he's starting to deteriorate and have mood swings and his hair is falling out#and his friends turn the care back at him!!!#and they find a solution!#yaaay#i have been rambling for far too long lol#if you read all these tags that's pretty cool!#make sure to like subscribe and hit the bell#<3
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AU in which the trio opens a fine dining restaurant. It's like The Bear but with vampires.
#ts4#sims 4 gameplay#ts4 gameplay#sims 4#the zhaoverse#lilith vatore#caleb vatore#helena zhao#i'm trying my hardest not to spoil shots from the actual scene#so have this behind the scenes silliness instead#i had helena and caleb cook all the food rather than attempt actual restaurant gameplay lol#they had a great time!#poor hugo villareal happened to be the lone employee still wandering around after i changed the lot to generic#anyway i'm currently making some fun poses for a few of your lovely vampires!#realistically i'll probably start posting again the second week of october because i want to try to finish all three parts completely!#this is the most time and effort i've put in since the party scene last fall!
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Daily Diana #10
I am going issue by issue through Wonder Woman (1987—) and drawing my favourite outfits on a very vague daily schedule. This was Issue 10 and we're back to Themyscria's warrior outfits!!! (The crowd goes wild). There were some other outfits too but idk man I wanted to draw this one again. Also! Battle Axe!! Hell yeah.
Masterlist || Previous || Next
This outfit in context (man i wish i had time to draw all those creepy hands):
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#the timing of this was a little rough ngl#as i've gone through quite a few major sleep schedule changes and at least 1 full rotation (and quite a few all-nighters) since starting th#but oh well!!#i had a lot of fun with this one#and i think ive figured out a bit more on how to draw her skin so it looks like clay#I also added some body hair#gonna work on both of those#dc comics#daily diana#my art#wonder woman#diana of themyscira#diana prince
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When I first got into Kirby, I didn't expect to like, actually get into it. I thought it'd be like any other hyperfixation I'd had up to that point, that it would go away within a few months and I'd never think about it again.
Given I was so deeply in denial, I didn't care about being fully accurate and had some stuff that was really goofy and/or underdeveloped and unexplained. Stuff I'd made up to just work for the limited time I would be there.
Still, I came up with a few headcanons that I got attached to, and when I started realizing this was here to stay, I still chose to be stubborn and had to work backwards to keep these stupid headcanons, but adapt them into something a bit more fitting and polished.
It led to some cool stuff, like for example, my orbs aren't very magical, this was something I had settled on early on. But after I got invested, I had to think about what that actually meant and the implications of it like, how can they do this without magic? And what about that? What about this canon thing, how do I explain it?
I found decent enough explanations for all of these. But as a result of my unserious beginnings and continued stubborness, now I get really embarrassed at the time to actually talk about my headcanons and the stuff I've come up with.
Because what do you mean your Galacta Knight is half-dragon?
#what am i. 12 years old. you're making him a fucking dragon? and he barely even Actually resembles one? cringe#so so cringe. everytime i think about how im going to have to reveal that eventually i get so embarrassed#i've been by myself on my lore for almost 2 years. as in i had no friends who were into it#so i was talking to myself and people who only learned kirby stuff from me#so i never fully realized just how cringe an outsider would find it until recently#but it always made sense To Me. with what I'd come up with and how I'd made it work#i fear people wouldn't think his story and the role his dragoness plays into it is enough to warrant it.#they'll think i just did it because i wanted to. and that Is the reason too. partly.#when i started i saw that bit of text about mk's wings not being real. that they were his cape and adult orbs don't have wings#and figured gk's wings and horns mustn't be real either if that was true. but that was weird so i wanted him to actually have them.#but i'd settled on this at the time already so how would i explain him being the exception?#my solution was to just. make him a hybrid. that'd solve it. I didn't know he was a dragon at the time though. so it doesn't#show in his design a whole lot. when you look at his dragon dad he does look a lot like him. but said dragon dad also does not look like#a dragon at all. not a scaley reptile typical one. so that's Another layer to my problem#my thoughts on orb wings and horns have since changed. theoretically I could totally make gk a normal orb now. but#i also decided that the only reason he Specifically can use magic it's because of this half-dragonness 😭#another show of him being the exception. he's always stood out as odd#so there's actually no going back. i'd also have to get rid of his fuzz and who'd want that#text post
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outfit swapped my most dapper blorbos
#reverse 1999#r1999#vanitas no carte#vnc#the case study of vanitas#reverse 1999 vertin#vertin#noé archiviste#noe archiviste#fanart#titaniumart#outfit swap#clothing swap#i've had this idea for like a month#since i got back into vnc#finally got around to it#funnily vertin does have a similar outfit#i mean the one from the jazz collab ... close enough welcome back noé archiviste#that's what i thought#these two are actually quite similar in a lot of ways when i think about it#aughhhhh. noé would be a good timekeeper. change my mind#also hoping this reaches the vnc fandom#i'd love to start drawing more fanart for that series too
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WE DID IT! MY FAMILY AND I ARE MOVING!!!🤩🥳🤩🥳🤩
After ten long years in a multigenerational abusive home, we're finally getting out!!! Thank you for all the support and prayers everyone! This is amazing!
I'm not yet sure what will become of this blog, but it's definitely getting a revamp! So while I'm not coming back yet, (I'll be busy moving, and rebuilding me and my family's lives after all.) expect some big changes coming!
THANK YOU SO MUCH GUYS!!! The support means everything to us!💖💖💖💖
#JP speaks#YAYAYAYAYYAYAY!#I've changed a lot as a person since I first started this blog. So I want my revamped blog to reflect that.#Hopefully it will look really nice once I'm done with it!
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There is a new person in one of my servers with 'small' and 'bean' as their name (albeit small is spelt 'smol', but principle of the matter)........
I have to kill them
(This is a joke)
#bean talks too much#I am not going to do that bc I do not talk in that server and I refuse to start now jfxdgksdgf#I should also not be surprised bc a lot of people use that 'uwu smol bean cinnamon roll' talk#I did! That's where the name came from and then it stuck bc it's been nearly 10 years and I am too lazy to change now#even if I no longer identify with what the words actually mean y'know#or at least I am trying not to be so timid - am still small height wise tho#and I got way fatter since then kjfdkjsd#also surprisingly a lot of people get it wrong or confuse me for someone else#I've seen the 'small' and 'timid' swapped a bunch - so it's 'timidsmallbean'#a lot of 's' put on the end so it's 'smalltimidbeans'#'shylittlebean' is close but no#'smallmindedbean' was an interesting one#my twitter was 'beantimid' for a while and Idk why jkdfkj#but anyways
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pop stars aren't born in the 70s anymore like they used to be. These days they're born in a year uncomfortably close to my own which makes me clutch my chest and cry out
#music#musicians#Nia Archives was on radio the other day going 'my album's the first jungle album to be nominated for the Mercury Prize in over 25 years#that's such an honour! The last one was Roni Size and I wasn't even born then' --hang on a minute#that album was like. 1997. 'I wasn't even born yet'?#Folks she is a year older than me 😭(❤️ but also personally 😒)#Cat Burns' Mercury shortlisted album is called 'early twenties'. It is a term I am told I can no longer use for myself.#She says 'the album was a 4-year long process. I started writing it when I was 20.' Cat Burns is my age.#CMAT. Dublin's 'global superstar'. 1997. Literally she's such a classic popstar/country star I'd have expected to read like '1987' or somet#not in terms of saying she's old or anything; just that that seems appropriate for someone who's in control of their career#CMAT is like 2 years older than I am. It's so wild to me#especially this time! There have been a lot of debut albums you see#and I'm really proud of all these--I suppose at my age I'm allowed to say--kids; my peers? But it's also so strange to see#My peers are at the Mercuries. Declan McKenna is like a year older than me#That has been in my head ever since Brazil came out. He was 15. I was 14.#sigh it's a long road to either acceptance or such radical change that I 'catch up' with everyone; whatever that means#yes I'm well aware that comparison isn't a thing to do. I know it's not productive.#I try not to let it get me anxious; afterall what do I do about it?#It's not like I've got the ball rolling on anything significant to speak of. I'm just at ordinary work#idk also the industry I work in doesn't exist anymore hahahaaaa so yeah. No career. Only far away admirations! :)#We will have no infrastructure and we will be happy.#Don't read all this; just laugh at the meme about age and move on#growing up
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My Neekeys over the last two-odd years. I was curious to see the changes 🤔
#forgive the low quality dfghfds it was just an experiment#now to do the DRAW ANYONE ELSE challenge#siggy draws#he is my blorbo. my muse. i guess#don't get me wrong. i am CRINGING and SWEATING at just the thought of uploading this.#have i been drawing almost every day my entire life? yes. does my style still change all the time? yes!#and i'm mostly self-taught so i struuuuggle a lot. i'll finally admit that reference pictures help immensely. no shit lol.#i learned a lot in the last 2 years!!! there are some really ugly ones i didn't show but i kept the cringe old ones sdfghfds help.#i mean they're still here on tumblr so i can't exactly hide them#you can kind of see when i actually started to use reference pictures. and when i got more used to using a tablet#idk digital art is so hard. it's a whole other world. but i'm in it now and haven't drawn traditionally in forever#i can also literally see how i used to CRUSH my nibs while drawing. all those really thin lines?? i pressed too hard lol#i've actually kept all my nibs since i started drawing digitally and....... it's too many fghfds#that one slightly more realistic nicky in the bottom right of the first collage lmaooo. i should finish him... maybe... it's haaard.#the top right on the first collage and bottom right on the second one are good comparisons ;_; they're both pirate!nico gifts for lily!!#i'm feeling sentimental now omg
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Part 1: Mad King's War
Prologue: Diverged History(pages 22-25)
#myart#fanart#fire emblem#Fire Emblem Wrong Bird au#naesala#chrom#fe frederick#fe lissa#fire emblem awakening#tellius#FE WB au MKW#FE WB au MKW prologue#and this is why i keep repeating there is no schedule#cause its been a month since the last batch#but the show still goes on!#also finally a scene change even if it's just distant mountain/hill things at certain angles#it's a start at least#i know i keep repeating how excited i am for when this finally picks up in story-#-and inevitably visuals as i get better and better at drawing various stuff-#-but i am still enjoying myself making this thus far#(even if i kept taking detours to work on artfight refs whoops)#but anyways#not much to ramble on this time on my end#but who knows maybe there's something yall want to mention about this au in which case feel free#might not be able to answer questions aside from vague answers since i have a self-imposed gag order specifically for my fancomic aus#which is pretty much just me not talking about things that haven't been seen or explained yet#so when we get in much much deeper there's more i can talk about but as of rn not much i can give answers for#just know i've thought about this au in a lot of depth (probably more then needed tbh)#(overthinking is true for other aus too like my non-fancomic aus which i do in fact have i just haven't talked about em yet whoops)
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I always feel like I'm missing so much in your fics! Tell me something secrete about them!
Oh I nearly missed this! Sorry!
Let me tell you about FIRE:
I was gonna write a giant essay about how I use fire/Tommy lighting a fire repetitively in my fics, quoting the multiple times, meaning of each, how they interlock with his capability, capacity, libido (life drive not just sex drive), etc...but that's probably overkill XD.
Here's the short version: I do use references to fire or the act of lighting fires (not lighting fires) very deliberately. This was motivated by, and ties into, Tommy also doing the same in the show - and I pay special attention to when he can and can't light those fires, and who he might choose to ask to light a fire. For example, in series, there are times when it's John and Arthur, or even Jeremiah (as it comes to Ruby's pyre, which I'll elaborate on because it was such a powerful scene - from what I've been able to find re European Romani funereal tradition, albeit I coudln't *specifically* find period-references to Angloromani or Irish Traveller ritual, that *should* have been Tommy lighting it. Research does have an interesting split between whether it's necessary to stay to watch a funeral pyre burn til the end (as the fam did with Polly) or whether it's actually more respectful/acceptable to walk away early (turn your back on death to face instead to life)).
Then, to add another layer to this symbolic importance of Fire, when I started researching narrowboats and what daily life was like on narrowboats pre-electricity, I also then discovered how important maintaining the stove/fire in the living quarters was. The stoves were Aga or Aga-style, and they take forever to heat up. Basically, you get them going over hours, and *keep* them going, because if they go out you have ages before you can build the heat up again to something useable. And given you could reasonably freeze to death on the water, in an uninsulated boat, in the north, in the night, in winter, the fire/stove seemed very important.
I don't know how much the Shelbys would have been in the worst case northern-style winter conditions in the midlands, but irrespective, England is cold and living on water is freezing: the idea of the kids needing to permanently tend this dangerous and all-consuming, hungry thing dwelling on the boat really appealed to me for multiple reasons - especially because there's no modulation. Either they'd be freezing in those living quarters, or they'd be walking into a hotter-than-hell situation (not possible to temperature-modulate all that well), and they'd have to consciously *keep that fire burning* in a hotter than hell situation, because the heat of hell, at least, was being alive.
So yeah, a secret: if there's a reference to fire or lighting fires in my fics, there's a weight of thinking behind it even if it seems random.
#welp that's one thing#my brain overflowed when i read this question but as soon as i started answering every other....easter egg?...disappeared#and there are a lot of easter eggs. hope that entices :)#i suppose one other secret is that i'm still revising fics in micro-ways every time i unravel more research/culture/history#eg: the way i've referred to the Romani language has matured significantly since I started researching; such a complexity there alone#many retrospective edits which don't materially change the story but endeavour to improve the texture of them#my fav fire reference is in 'the cage kills more than lions' when tommy has a meltdown insisting he needs to light the fire in ada's house#she talks him down by convincing him it's summer and pleading frugality - they're 'not a family who wastes fuel' - appealing to old pattern#because the lighting the fire is an old pattern he's trying to assert while feeling completely bewildered/lost at that point
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#Having a 3.5 year gap in talking to a whole group of people I was incredibly close to and then very very abruptly#wasn't is kinda refucking me up now I'm interacting with them again#like 1 of them I wasn't super close to#but friends#and we were playing dumb 4 players chess with a couple of others#and then 2 hours after finishing for the night#and saying happy new year#haven't seen you since last year#etc etc#was just not gonna interact for closing on 4 years#like it fucked me up a lot at the time#and it's nice to be talking to that group again#but#god it's pulling a scab off#on some levels it's delightfully the same#falling back into old patterns#but also there's just these whole gaps in each others lives#and stuff we're inevitably not gonna remember#I've lived in 2 cities and worked jobs and had relationships that have changed me#I mean I've changed my whole name lmao#like#idk it's just very bittersweet and sad#especially seeing ppl in the discord user list or whatever who I still haven't dared contact#opening the DMs and seeing the last messages are happy new year stuff from that one midnight#I'm not the same they're not the same and we could have changed in each others company#silly ramble#if u saw this before I edited it no u didn't : i starte dit as a post then decided I wanted venty tags instead
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sunday six :D
taking the initiative for a change.... so i'm going to boop @four-white-trees @passthroughtime @skysquid22 @overdevelopedglasses
chipping away at sensei fic this week! here's kitakata and yagami making out lol excuse my bluntness... don't feel obligated to read if you're not into that o7
Yagami reached for Kitakata’s arm, found his hand, and guided it to his hip. Yagami pulled away from the kiss.
“Touch me, would you?”
Kitakata’s breath was warm on his lips. “Where would you like it?”
“Figure it out yourself.” He said and kissed him again. Kitakata didn’t seem to complain. His fingers slipped under the hem of Yagami’s shirt, meeting skin. He touched along the base of his spine, and Yagami couldn’t suppress the slight shiver that went through him. He could only imagine how gratifying this was for Kitakata. Hell, just seeing Yagami checking him out probably made his whole week, now this. He’d never be able to stop him from flirting now.
Yagami leaned into Kitakata’s hold, into his mouth, against that eager tongue. He was about to make Kitakata’s whole damn year.
#sunday six#good evening kuwagami nation#excuse my eagerness i've been sitting on this snippet for days#funnily enough an accidental pair with the last sunday six i posted#feels like i'm starting to make a bit more progress thank goodness#i've been needing to go over this scene for a long time and i finally did!#unlike my last sunday six this one is basically all new writing#the “make his week/year” thing was from the previous version of this scene and that's about it#for reference they first kiss at.... page 16 of my doc#and this is after the second kiss (unless i make drastic changes) and it's on.... page 44. lol#i know that doesn't say a whole lot since font size but yknow. just for reference as to how i'm going#not used to working on anything that's not a short oneshot so it's been an experience for sure#excuse my waffling i just can't stop yapping about sensei fic#four-white-trees can you just pretend you didn't get sent this whole scene yesterday? great wonderful thank you
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Okay, so, life update in the tags
#i speak#i know i've vague posted about a guy a lot#and it may be a little soon to make any update/announcements#but hey#anyway there's a guy#we've been friends for awhile. but recently circumstances have changed#before he was Very Off Limits#and now he's not#long story#and shortly after that he started flirting#and. idk. past two weeks have been a whirlwind.#officially we're 'talking'#but. idk he's super sweet and cute and funny and just. i'm really happy. ^-^#trying to keep my head on my shoulders a bit#because again. realistically. it's been two weeks tomorrow since he started flirting.#wasn't even really on his radar before#and again. off limits before.#but.... idk i know 'i've never felt like this' is a cliche but as someone who's only had one relationship#and a couple of almosts#i really never have#and i know feelings aren't everything#again. trying to keep a level head.#but... yeah. ^-^ ✨️
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5 AM
Just me and my overactive mind facing the nighttime again 🙃
#hopefully the meds work but while waiting for them to kick in I get so damn nervous#and sometimes I do get nights where even on my full dose my anxiety is too overpowering and I just. Do Not Sleep#I mean I do eventually but not without spiraling first :')#way before I was prescribed sleep meds my longest was 3 nights without sleep while on a VERY stressful trip#I felt like I was gonna die and I did not sleep until I got off the plane and was back at home#(this was like 15 years ago already but it still haunts me fhfgsgdh)#my best friend and I were having a conversation today#and she was like 'not sleeping can make you hallucinate right?'#and I was like :') I get the hallucinations in other scenarios too#BUT I also get what she meant#not sleeping is really bad for me mentally which is why I can't do 'sleep restriction therapy'#and fun fact#a lot of my OCD obsessions revolve around sleep!!!#which is 'awesome' because laying in bed with insomnia makes my OCD flare up so like#the two get to feed off each other and make my life a living hell!!!#and don't even get me started on my sleep paralysis episodes#(which I like to think of as just my brain misfiring but that my aunt tells me is saints or demons trying to talk to me)#'cause she hallucinates too but hers are like 'spiritual' or whatever#same with my mom's hallucinations as well#and to add fuel to the dumpster fire of my mind and body is the fact I've been overcaffeinating again#which I've known not to do ever since I was in middle school and saw the pediatric cardiologist who specifically said 'hey don't do that'#fast-forward to adulthood and I still haven't learned how to handle anything#like. I have heart meds and sleep meds and migraine meds and IBS meds#and yes meds are good but like. I know you need to incorporate lifestyle changes as well#which I do for like 2 weeks until the next time I fuck up#I've been so irresponsible lately but like. ESPECIALLY today#didn't eat#took some meds on an empty stomach and forgot to take my other ones at all#had too much caffeine#stressed out over some stupid situations thanks to overthinking
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wanna go back and redraw so many of the things I've posted here
#partly feelings of well I've deleted so much of the stuff I've posted since C3 started and it's honestly kinda a good thing that I feel like#I've improved and continue to#but also in the way that I just feel like I can't draw anything new any more and I'm burnt out but still want to draw and if I did draw what#I wanted to it'd just be#idk#I feel like I've lost a lot of confidence in making stuff for myself to enjoy first#not sure if I've lost the relationship I had with making fanart or if the space has really changed that much and I just feel out of it#someone tell me to stop being a dumb dumb and just draw what I want to when I want to
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