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sleepiexx · 18 days

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The Sad Expression on the Face I Love So Much

Remus Lupin x fem!Reader

Note: one bad week and suddenly I’m a fic writing god again. Had a Sirius oneshot planned out and mostly written but I pumped this one out before I could think of an ending to that one so you’re getting this first!

Summary: Your boyfriend patiently awaits your arrival home after a day out with your friends, only to be met with your saddened form.

Warnings: describes what i would refer to as a panic attack, but it’s never expressed to be one

Word count: 1310

Remus was a good man, it was such a shame you couldn’t match his upbeat energy when you entered the door to your shared apartment.

He had heard the front door click open, which sparked a smile on his face. He never wanted to stop your outings with friends, as he knew having relationships with people other than your partner was important— his own friends the truest testament to that statement— yet he couldn’t help but miss you when the house was left without your presence. Which is why he was pleasantly surprised by your early arrival home, no waiting up late for his nightly cuddle tonight, no, rather a nice long cuddle with a movie in the background.

He called out to you as he stood from the couch, scrambling to make his way to the foyer, “you’re home early, darling, how was your day out?”

He stopped in his tracks when he saw you. Your frame stiff, eyes glued to the floor, clearly shined over with tears that have yet to be shed, keys still clutched in your hand, likely because you’d been too distraught to even reach up to put them on the key hook.

“Oh, sweet dear, what’s wrong? What’s happened?” His worried words and the safe environment he had provided made the tears finally fall. In an instant, he was in front of you, wrapping you in his arms. A pained sob ripped its way through your chest, you’d been holding it in far too long.

“My friends…” you began, having a hard time composing yourself to even say what was wrong.

Remus had a hunch what the problem was. He didn’t like your friends for a very specific reason, but he had always stayed firm in the fact that you were the judge in who you were friends with and it was really none of his business who you did and didn’t hang around. He knows he would not listen if you had said you didn’t want him spending time with his friends.

“I- I just… I’ve been really anxious this week,” You started to talk with the shakiest of voices. Remus could tell from the way your breaths started cutting you off that you were beginning to hyperventilate. He didn’t want to stop you from talking it out, though, so he led you to come and sit down beside him where he’d been on the couch before allowing you to continue.

“And irritable— and- and- and you know how I- how I spiral when I’m irritable, because- because I just think such mean thoughts, and- and I just hate myself,” your stutter only got worse the more you revealed, because speaking about it made you think about it, and thinking about it made breathing harder. Not to mention the sniffling you had to do every five seconds so you wouldn’t cover your upper lip in snot.

Remus held your hand, rubbing soothing circles overtop your knuckles and keeping his own breathing as steady as possible in hopes that you would eventually sync up. His free hand moved its way to your back, rubbing up and down.

“I just thought,” you sniffled, futility wiping your face with your sleeve as you continued to cry, “that maybe I’d f-feel- feel better if I went out with- with my friends but..” your lungs seized and your voice came out strained and cracked, “but no.”

You wanted to keep your breathing steady for Remus, but it proved impossible. Your diaphragm seemed to have a mind of its own as it contacted with no care whatsoever of your say so.

“They just kept- kept making that stupid joke,” your voice was drowned in a visceral sadness and a defeated anger, making evident to Remus how you’d held off on sharing your feelings for far too long.

He knew well what joke you were talking about. It never sat right with him, made him clench his fists every time he heard it. It took everything in him not to blow up on your poor excuse of a friend group. He’d played the diplomat with your friends as long as he possibly could.

“Where they-“ sniff. “Pretend that-“ sniff. “They hate me- but- but-“ sniff. “But they get away- get away with it because-“ sniff. “Because I’m such a pushover and- and I never call them ou- out on it.”

Another sob wracked your whole body, Remus pulled you into him, your cheek pressed to his chest as he made a valiant effort to calm you down with his soothing touches.

“I know- I know that I’m a lot-“ sob. “But I- I’m kind. I- I treat th-them good so- so why d-don’t I deserve the same?”

Remus felt his heart drop, holding you steady through what felt like, to you, endless sobbing. He had always thought that you deserved so much more than the friends you made, but he just thought you had a really thick skin towards the subject. Everyone has a breaking point, he supposed, and for his sweet girl, this seemed to be it.

“Oh dove,” he cooed, “of course you deserve better. You are not ‘a lot,’ you are true to yourself, if they don’t understand that then that is their problem. You do so much just for them to be so ungrateful.”

You buried yourself further into him, holding onto him tightly as though he were a buoy in a storm. You sat for a while like that, until you could speak without stuttering as much— still, your quiet voice hardly carried and the heartbroken rasp in it was a sound unlike any heartache Remus had ever experienced “I wish I could control myself sometimes. Just- just make myself shut up once in a while.”

Remus scoffed, “I don’t.”

You looked up at him through heavy lashes, “really?”

You looked as if even a small gust of wind would make you shatter, yet Remus would guard you from it all, wind, or storm, or even shitty friends who don’t appreciate you.

“Of course not, sweetheart, I love how genuine you are. It’s what made me fall for you. That, and how hard you love. I’ve never doubted myself for a second when I’ve been around you.” He brushed some stray hairs from your face, “I have never been able to stand your friends, they aren’t as kind to you as you are to them.”

You nodded. He knew that it would take a while before you fully believed it, but he was willing to shower you in love every day until you believed it. In fact, he was already planning on integrating you into his own friend group, James and Sirius adored you and he had no doubt they’d love the idea. Lily, Marlene, and Mary would all love you too, he knew for a fact that girls nights with them had to be more fun than with your old friends.

For now, though, he’d settle for the calm you’d finally achieved after talking your way through such an intense wave of emotions, he was proud.

“What do you say we go back to our room, have a cuddle, and watch your favorite movie?”

“Yeah,” you mumble.

“Yeah?”

You nod and repeat yourself as he cracks a grin.

You walk hip to hip to your bedroom until you’re finally able to sink into your bed. Remus hands you the tv remote before disappearing into the bathroom, returning with a soft, wet rag covered in makeup remover. Your cheeks seem to tingle as you remember the mess of mascara that must currently paint them, Remus doesn’t hesitate to come wipe you clean. When he’s done, he tosses the rag and leaves a chaste kiss on your nose.

“There,” he mutters, lying beside you and pulling you into his arms, “this is much better, isn’t it?”

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #marauders x reader #hurt/comfort #angst #fluff #the marauders #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fic #remus lupin fluff

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somereaderinblue · 3 months

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Random Ultraman Rising Moments I Loved

Decided to rewatch Ultraman Rising & I enjoyed it just as much as I did the first time. Thus, I've decided to compile a list of random moments that made me love the movie & its characters even more.

WARNING: SPOILERS UP AHEAD

(P.S. sorry for the lackluster screenshots ;p)

Ken's Intro

This one simple line already shows the audience Ken's empathy. Despite resenting his Ultraman responsibilities, he doesn't hate kaiju.

Ken's Childhood

This frame is full of adorable details. There's the obvious ones, like Ken wearing Ultraman & baseball merch, showing us that even before his relationship with his dad went sour, he already had a loyal love for the sport. We also see toy cars, a mecha & the BINGO bunny, all of which would be present in his base.

The Interview Intro

We see Ken getting the celebrity treatment & him wearing the celebrity mask. However, even the mask isn't malicious. He addresses the reporter by his name instead of the news station he's representing. When Ami tries to ask more personal questions unrelated to his baseball career, he doesn't get huffy or defensive at her. Instead, he reminds the crowd to remain civil & it isn't until she explicitly asks about his mom that he leaves.

People shouldn't expect rewards for basic decency, but I'm not against acknowledging acts of kindness & respect you don't often see in an environment as cutthroat as a celebrity interview.

Ken's 'Giants'

Imo, there's 2 ways for the term 'Giants' to be interpreted here.

(1) Ken is referring to Ultraman, & by extension his dad. One's a literal giant while the other is metaphorical, esp for kids.

(2) He's referring to the possibility of making friends. As he mentioned to Ami, he knows firsthand how 'kids will always talk', implying that he's been bullied & ostracized as a child, possibly due to his Japanese heritage or some other reason that's nonetheless soured Ken's perception of friendship.

Ken & Ami's 1-on-1s

Ngl, when I saw the trailers, I braced myself for the possibility that Ami would serve as Ken's possible love interest. However, that's not the case, which I'm grateful for. Still, that doesn't take away how interesting Ami is as a character.

Their first interview is set up beautifully. They're sitting face-to-face but there's a table between them. And then there's the way they present themselves.

Ken is dressed casually, practically oozing 'cocky young celebrity without a care in the world'. He's wearing sunglasses indoors, that also cover his eyes. It's a classic character design trope meant to make someone look stern, intimidating, stoic, reserved, closed-off from everyone.

Ami on the other hand is dressed professionally, as she takes her job seriously. But her glasses are transparent & not aesthetical. She has to be fair & objective, yes, but she also values honesty, transparency & empathy. Its these traits that make her a reliable person for Ken to turn to when he was struggling with parenting Emi.

Interview #2. They're sitting next to each other instead of opposite, but there's still a table between them. Still, this time Ken isn't wearing sunglasses & he's more put-together whereas Ami is dressed more casually. Ken has opened up to her & he wants to keep trying; she in turn meets him in the middle.

This culminates into the final interview. Unlike the previous times, it's clearly one that's broadcasted to the public. Despite this, Ken again, isn't wearing sunglasses or putting on an attitude. There's no table between them because this is the climax of Ken's character development: he's learned that it's okay to be vulnerable, it's okay to show others that you're being vulnerable.

Ken's Comfort

When Ken's reminded of his inadequacy as Ultraman, he turns to the one thing that makes him happy: baseball. But he doesn't ask Mina to pull up videos of the crowd cheering or him winning; instead, he watches recordings of his mom, of the happy memories he shared with her. Yes, Ken has an ego. But underneath it all, he genuinely loves baseball because that sport is deeply tied to the love he has for his mom.

Not Gossip Hour

.....am I the only one who couldn't help but cheer Ami on when she called this guy out?

Prof. Sato's Cheer

Nobody, esp parents, should force their children to become someone they don't want to be. It's even more heartbreaking when both parties have little choice in the matter because of how necessary the duty is. Parents are flawed people, but I wouldn't call Prof. Sato a bad one.

Yes, he wants Ken to do better as Ultraman too. But he knows how much his son loves baseball & does support his achievements in them.

Mother's Corpse

Sometimes, a brief glance can convey a thousand words. In this brief glance, Ken doesn't see a defeated kaiju, he sees the corpse of a mother & he'll be damned if he lets the KDF add a baby's corpse to accompany her.

Mina is Awesome

A good plot is always appreciated but good characters are always loved & Mina isn't an exception. Let's hear it for the orb robots that always act as a voice of reason!!

But srsly, I love Mina. I love her wit, how her voice has that robotic yet motherly lilt, how she cares for Ken's wellbeing but isn't afraid to put her foot down to push him in the right direction.

In her final moments, she doesn't say 'you must/have to save her', she knows she doesn't have to. Instead, she tells him 'you can save her'. Sometimes, people are so focused on making sure others know what they have to do that they neglect to let them know that they believe they can accomplish it.

Onda's Humanity

Which brings me to another character I loved: the antagonist himself. Loved how they made him nuanced & sympathetic. Yes, he's ruthless, pragmatic & the 'end justifies the means' sort of person. However, unlike most military bad guy leaders, he cares for those under his command.

His screentime with Captain Aoshima is brief, but I enjoyed all of it. He doesn't berate Aoshima when he fails to capture Emi, nor does he lash out at him when he wavers in their mission. Instead, he encourages & empathizes with him.

Lots of fans speculate that Aoshima will have a more major role in a future sequel & I rlly hope that when the time comes, he'll be just as complex & engaging to watch as his predecessor had been.

"I Don't Know What To Do"

Kids are usually the target audience for Ultraman, but you cannot tell me this moment didn't hit home for parents. That moment where your child gets hurt because you looked away for a second; the first time your child falls ill & you wonder if a common cold will kill them before old age.

Whether you're a parent, older sibling or someone working in medical/childcare, having to say those 6 words will be the most devastating moment of your life. I'm certain that for Ken, it was nothing less.

Final Boss

Let it not be said that Ken doesn't know his final battle clichés.

#ultraman #ultraman rising #ultraman meta #everyday i see more and more ultraman rising content & smile #here's to hoping this amazing movie gets an equally amazing sequel!#ken sato #emi #ami watake

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vampirememory · 3 months

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quality ✧ do you need to lower or raise your standards? [Love PAC]

Hello! I believe this is my first pick a card of 2024, I hope you appreciate the topic I chose. This is something that I recently had to recognize and deal with myself, so hopefully you find this reading helpful.

Pick a photo or a number one through three and continue reading to find your reading.

One

No, absolutely not. If anything, your standards are too low. You are like me, at least myself a few weeks/months ago when I did not value myself. You need to understand that you are 100% valuable and loved, and that there is nothing that can depreciate your value. You may have been overconsuming readings, questioning as to why you continue getting into toxic relationships or completely lack a relationship and it's because you have a negative sense of self. Listening to self-worth or self concept subliminals may help you. You are worthy of a healthy, happy relationship but you need to be healthy yourself first. Now keep in mind, healthy does not mean without illnesses. I know from my experience with depression, I will never be healthy, but you CAN have a healthy outlook on life and a healthy sense of self, which is what you are looking for. Especially for my mentally ill friends, no one (not here, at least) is expecting you to be 100% healthy but to be as healthy as you can be, if that makes sense.

Two

Girlie, I hate to tell you but your standards are high as fuck. But is that a bad thing? You tell me. To be clear, when I say girlie I am 100% being gender neutral, this reading is for everyone ^-^! You're giving boss bitch energy, but are you actually a boss bitch? One thing about having high standards is that you also need to meet those standards yourself and you need to ask yourself "would someone like that want to date me"? For example, if you're really aiming for a basketball player or the top CEO, are you actually in a mental and physical space where that will happen? Are you out on the courts, networking and integrating yourself into sports environments? Are you working your way up to the top, making connections with higher ups and building a good reputation? I think you may have good standards, but you aren't reaching them yourself or not putting yourself in environments where you'll meet said person. Also make sure you are actually maintaining those standards too. If you think education is important, and you're actively in education and want someone else who is too, why settle for someone who hates education or isn't looking to educate themselves? Things like that make all the difference. If you want to talk the talk, you need to walk the walk too.

Three

This pile gives me much softer vibes than the other two piles. Your standards and romantic requests may be more traditional, you may want the house and the kids and the white picket fence and that's totally fine! I think you're doing well in terms of your standards, you uphold them and you aren't putting yourself in situations where you are with people who are against that dream or against those standards. I do need to warn you, however, that there are a lot of exploitive people out there, especially when it comes to wanting a more traditional homelife. Waiting is a completely fine thing to do. Don't jump at the first person that looks nice and ticks all the boxes because they may be lying. I don't see terrible things happening for you but I feel like I needed to include a warning. Just be careful and you'll get your wishes <3.

Thats all for today my friends! Check out my masterlist for my previous readings and remember to stay safe in this crazy world! Feel free to send asks with any topics you would like to see in the future.

#pick a card tarot #pick a card #pick a card reading #love tarot #free tarot reading #tarot readings #tarot reading #tarot #vampirememory #love pick a card

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genderqueerdykes · 1 year

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i understand they're not for everyone, but i do think a lot of people who are primarily exposed to queerness through online discourse would benefit from going to a queer bar and experiencing other queers having fun with each other in a distinctly queer way. i had been looking to attend a kink night at a queer bar for a while, and I finally got to go to one last night, and i'm very glad that i did. I was fortunate that the bar I went to had CBD drinks, so I could enjoy myself despite not being able to drink alcohol

there was an old woman with a rollator who set up at a table right next to the stage with free candy and snacks for everyone, but especially for the drag performers. I found that a lot of people there ended up calling her mom. she gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me to get home safe as I was leaving. she told me she'd see me next weekend, see was there every week.

there were adults of all ages there it was an underwear & animal play night, and the house was busy. drag queens and kings, bears, pups, bunnies, cats, leather people and all kinds of vanilla folks showed up. people in collars and harnesses, in jockstraps and leather briefs, on leashes, being lead around on their hands and knees. there were drag performances all throughout the nights and some of the queens included BDSM elements into their performances

i spent the night dancing with the leather puppy boys including an FTM pup who became my friend, some extremely cute old men with white hair and glittery shorts, a middle aged asian man in tiny black undies who really got into the music, an older man who looked like Freddie Mercury who was wearing tiny undies with pink straps and tall pink pumps, a lesbian couple who were fiercely making out most of the night, and a very tall person wearing a shirt that said "stay queer as fuck" with glittery rhinestoned shoes.

i saw a lot of people who were unafraid to be themselves. a lot of people who were willing to show this small slice of the world who they are, their authentic self, no matter what that meant. no one did anything that invaded my boundaries by being their authentic selves. others being loud and proud about themselves didn't drown me out. i felt more like it was okay to be who i was, too. dancing with the pups helped me realize that i'm ready to get into pup play, after questioning if it was for me for years. the exposure was healthy, it's hard to know certain things for sure until you actually put yourself out there

it's not an environment for everyone, i get that. but in whatever ways you can find it exposure to other queers in person is lifesaving, especially when you are having fun. sitting and meeting with each other and discussing what it means to be queer is important, but having fun together in a queer way is literally vital to our health and well being. just talking about being queer all the time won't nourish your soul. experiencing queer fun is necessary, especially when it comes to adults. we're need to and are allowed to have fun with each other in a distinctly queer way. it's important to embrace it when and where possible, in whatever ways make sense for you.

you'll feel a lot less self conscious when you see other people happily flying their freak flag, too

#our writing #about us

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f1fnatic · 1 year

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SCRUTINY ⤿ f1 grid

→ ( in which. . . ) you are a woman on the f1 grid. you face criticism and digs almost every day from toxic fans, specifically the men. but, you shut them up after a rewarding race.

→ ( fanfic genre. . . ) written

→ ( pairing. . . ) 2023 f1 grid x female!reader

→ ( content warnings/disclaimers. . . ) cyberbullying, misogyny, sexism/sexist comments, overall a shitty environment. not based on this year's monaco grand prix or the season so far just has the drivers of this year's grid at this moment except alonso he is a reserve for aston martin, jumps around a little, not a completely solid plot, other pilots make subtle mentions, but mainly reader focused.

→ ( author's note. . . ) i enjoyed writing this one a lot. with being a woman myself and seeing how we are perceived in sports, especially a male-dominated field like motorsport, it was not very difficult to keep writing. anyways, i hope you enjoy! see end for more.

→ ( masterlist )

sunday, pre-race interview ↴

scrutiny. a word that you are familiar with. a word that has so much meaning but so little at the same time. you had recently joined your dream team, aston martin. after a challenging run in f3 and f2, you finally got recognized for your talent. you knew the comments would only get worse as you moved up the ranks, but you didn't expect them to be this bad.

it was the monaco grand prix. your least favorite track to race. the tight corners haunted you. without fail, you always almost crashed and cost your team everything. but it mainly cost you your dignity.

you were sat along a crisp white sofa that sat your teammate lance stroll, along with charles leclerc, lewis hamilton, lando norris, daniel ricciardo, and lastly max verstappen. you had all become acquainted when you first got to f1. lance and you got along swell and were close to inseparable. the rest were like brothers to you. these types of conferences were your personal least favorite. you enjoyed being with your friends, but the questions that were asked were downright embarrassing.

"y/n, coming over to you." the interviewer voiced, all attention was shifted onto you. "monaco in the past years has not treated you well, do you think you will have another devastating grand prix? and do you think your difference has to do with your performance?" you felt the scoff bubble in your throat. was he serious? you knew what he was playing at. your difference being your gender.

"well, first of all, i do not think my quote en quote 'difference' has anything to do with my performance." you start, putting finger quotes to emphasize the word difference. "if anything, it would be a difference in the car. in past monaco grand prix's the aston martin car has struggled. there are no real straights for the car to get its usual speed from. the differences in the care have nothing to do with me as a driver." this was unbelievable. were they really questioning whether you could hold your own as a woman in motorsport?

"you are starting p7 in today's race. do you think you performed well enough in qualifying? what could you have done differently?" finally. a normal question. you were excited to answer.

"uh, yeah. i think considering the conditions in qualifying and the nature of the track i did well. i am happy with how i performed but there is always room for improvement. and i am open to that." you answered, smiling. you looked over to lewis and saw him smiling at you. he knew how the media worked. he himself was getting pushed under the bus with racist remarks and 'concern' around his piercings. he was always supportive of you, and you were supportive of him. there were often times when you would text or call him ranting about how unfair it was that you were being treated the way you were. he would join in with his own stories and you would listen.

"y/n, i am sure you have seen the scrutiny online about being a woman competing in the pinnacle of motorsport. do you believe you should be here competing with men?" another reporter asks.

you are stunned. you couldn't believe what you were hearing.

"are you serious?" lance scoffs beside you. "what is with these questions?"

"why do we get questions about normal things like our literal jobs and y/n's questions are always about her gender?" daniel adds. the couch breaks out in murmurs. the reporters visibly get uncomfortable with what has happened and end the interview.

standing up you walk out of the office and to your drivers room, ignorning the voices calling after you. these interviews were always bullshit. daniel was right, why were you always getting questioned about your gender and how that effects your performance? what does gender have to do with racing?

this was only the beginning.

sunday, day of monaco grand prix ↴

you were exhausted. exhausted by the comments, the bullshit interviews, and the stupid prick men that felt the need to voice their opinion about a woman in f1.

you could this year's grand prix was going to be a tough one. mentally and physically. you wanted to be done. done with the bullying, the sexism, the misogyny, everything. you knew you worked hard to get where you are, and you will continue to. you dreaded the after-race interviews. no matter your result, you would always get at least 4 sexist remarks.

you didn't know what else you needed to do to be able to prove yourself worthy of your seat. you shouldn't have to prove yourself anymore than you have. you are in f1, and all of these assholes are not.

your pr manager, bless his soul, had to listen to your rants after interviews. lewis always got brunt end of it as well. he had experience with degradating comments. he always knew what to say and when to say it. fernando has been a huge help as well. he was like a father to you, always there when you needed someone. he would defend you when you needed defending. he always knew what to say and when to say it.

race start, p7 ↴

p7 was not a bad place to start, at all. but the internet and crowd thought differently. you were sat in your car, ready for the formation lap when someone yelled at you, "c'mon pretty lady! get back to cleaning! this is a man's sport!" you resisted the urge to quip back at him, instead you raised your left hand and flipped him off. your pr manager would have your head later but you couldn't care less. you needed to do something to voice your annoyance.

concentration is what you needed, but you couldn't seem to gain it with more comments being shouted your way. "hot momma!" followed by a cat call whistle, "sweetheart take off that suit! let's see what's underneath!", "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THIS JOB!" were only some of the handfuls thrown at you. they also seemed to be the ones that bothered you the most. your grip on your steering wheel tightened, anger bubbling in your gut. these people knew nothing. they don't know how hard you work. they don't know how much blood, sweat, and tears you poured into achieving your dream. and they never would.

before you knew it, the formation lap started. it went quickly. you got back into your respective starting positions and stared down the lights. you took a deep breath to attempt to ground yourself. it is just a race, you have done this before y/n.

the lights lit up red, until they didn't. you flew forward in your aston martin, pushing it for a decent start. you ended up gaining two positions, going from p7 to p5. the rest of the race was uneventful, until it wasn't.

"y/n, caution on the chicane. hamilton, perez, and leclerc crashed. yellow flag, safety car." your race engineer voiced over the radio. "that moves you into a fortunate p2."

"okay, copy." you were ecstatic. this was your chance to prove yourself to everyone. to those men who scrutinized you before the formation lap, to the trolls online, and to those misogynistic pricks known as reporters. this was your moment.

"gap to verstappen 1.6 seconds, push." you did as you were told. you pushed, and you pushed hard. this was for all of the girls that wanted to be you. "oh my days y/n! p1! p1! you just won the monaco grand prix!"

"yes! oh my god! fuck me! we did it!" you had done it.

you did your victory lap and parked behind the p1 tower. when you got out of your seat tears stung at your eyes. you ran over to where the aston martin team was and hugged them over the barrier. team members were banging on your helmet. lance had managed p2 and came up behind you and hugged you, along with the team.

the podium was a blur. you could not describe the emotions you were feeling. pride, excitement, and most of all, happiness were swirling within you. you stood tall as aston martin's anthem played and even taller when yours sounded shortly after. the champagne spray was the best part. carelessly spraying lance as giggles sounded on the podium. you also sprayed your team below, this would not have been possible without them. you would never forget this moment. it is forever engraved into your mind.

this was it, this was what you needed to prove them all wrong.

not feeling super happy w this one. i like the beginning but i feel it gets away from me in the middle and end. feedback and requests are welcome! make sure to leave a comment and kudos as well, only if u want to tho! lmk if you like it :)

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gerardpilled · 1 year

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I want to say thanks for acknowledging and being critical of racism done by MCR band members and racism in the scene in general. I just recently got into MCR a year ago on a deeper scale and I have found many things off putting and kind of yikes. It's nice seeing someone who is critical of what the band members have done in the past and not excusing them and addressing that it was an issue as a whole. I used to be very hateful towards Lindsey but now I realize that it would be hypocritical (I still do not like MSI just due to it not being my taste in music and I don't care for that shock value type lyrics). I was wondering if you know any resources that talk more about racism in the scene? It's something I'd like to know more about

Oh it’s no problem! Thank you for thanking me, but I don’t see myself as doing anything special. I was raised in an environment where I was fortunate enough to be around people and friends who have made me aware of implicit racism -from my self and others- since an early age. Hearing “well, that’s cause you’re white” is a playful joke but it also made me aware of stuff! Just from what I’ve seen in recent years, the shortcomings of white people who are the focus of fandom are often ignored. There’s nothing wrong with pointing out a racist thing your fave said or did because it doesn’t necessarily make them A Racist™️ (sometimes it can). It also helps people recognize the issues before they get worse. POC aren’t a monolith - there are plenty of things disagreed on amongst any community - but there are definitely over arching sentiments.

Anyway, I’m basically just reiterating a bunch of talking points made by poc on here. As for further reading, I feel like the best sources for me have been mutuals’ posts. First hand stories. Being receptive when people share how certain things make them feel. Racism in this particular scene is also sort of a new and emerging topic as the people who lived through the heart of it are just now reaching authorship age. I look forward to seeing what comes out in the next few years.

What I have right now:

My Chemical Relaxer - a short autobiographical story about growing up Black and emo

News story about how the current state of hardcore is looking much more diverse

Sing It Zine - zine made by fanartists a few years ago!! It’s great, I bought a digital copy myself. It’s filled with art and short essays about how it felt to grow up in a scene that often ignored non white people. Also a bunch of tumblr users participated, so it offers a great follow list if you’re interested.

If anyone else has any suggestions, add them in a reblog, or send them and I’ll do it!

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dragonfly0808 · 4 months

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college advice? i’m starting in the fall 😭

oh FUCK

Kay, so, I’m no professional here but I am about to pass into my 6th semester, so will hopefully soon be wrapping up my 3rd year of college so here’s some of advice

First off, go in the mornings, if you have a chance to do your schedule, go in the morning, it’s so fucking heavy to have to go in the evenings, did that once, never again

try to find a website or blog where students can give teachers reviews, these exist for most colleges and while it can be very hard to build your schedule based on the best teachers and I wouldn’t recommend doing that, it can help you be mentally prepared and know what each teacher values most ahead of time

always have smth to entertain yourself. You WILL have teachers who don’t show up or constantly cancel classes and while its fun using that time to catch up with friends, you should take a book or smth with you to keep yourself entertained during down time

if you have AFI’s (I have no fucking clue what they’re called in english but they’re activities, conferences, talks, outings, stuff like that) check how many you can do per semester and keep up with them, don’t leave them till last minute. For example, I need 14 to finish my career and can do up till 4 valid ones per semester but can only do them till my 7th semester. So check on that if you do have them as a requirement as well

Make sure you check out every part of your campus to know the best hangout spots. This is mostly just for yourself and to not get lost.

Hang out at your library if you have one, check out what they have even if you don’t particularly plan to use that many books, it can help motivate you and find more passion for your career if you’re feeling down or having doubts.

learn how to properly reference articles (perplexity is a great tool to find references)

make sure the teachers at least recognize you and, I would recommend to limit yourself to a certain number of classes you can miss. I try to limit myself to skip 3 classes from each teacher and try to not miss at all, the teachers recognizing me as someone who always goes has given me second chances and opportunities for extra points.

ALWAYS DO OPTIONAL PROJECTS FOR EXTRA POINTS, even if you feel confident in the subject, better to be safe than sorry

carry a cardigan or a light sweater and a small umbrella. You never know what teacher is gonna put the AC like it’s antartica and an umbrella can save you from sunburns and unexpected rain

carry headache pills or any medication you use semi-frequently, also a small utensils kit cause who likes using disposable utensils when you can carry your own + it’s better for the environment, also a hair tie

have an ‘emergency kit’, I have one that barely takes up a lot of space in my backpack and I am just now having to refill it 5 semesters in, I have mini deodorant, a small toothbrush/toothpaste I’ve never actually used, mini wet wipes, mini hand sanitizer, mini perfume, mini brush, toilet paper, band-aids, pads and kleenex.

^ these last 3 are cause my mama taught me to always be prepared and cause I personally can be a bit paranoid, I’m the mom-friend who always has anything anyone could ever need :) so those are according to the type of person you are. I also carry an UNO card game for when multiple teachers cancel on us (yes my backpack is very heavy but the paranoia can’t catch me if I’m prepared)

If you’re propense to low-sugar do NOT skip breakfast and try to carry a small snack, or in general always carry a small snack

if your career involves having to go to the laboratory, LISTEN TO THE INTERNS/LAB ASSISTANTS, half the time, they’ll know more than the teacher

remember, when it comes to group projects, you don’t have friends, you have classmates. Someone can be a great friend but an awful classmate and I am not risking a grade over a lazy friend, prepare yourself to separate those 2

try to figure out what to listen to when doing hw or studying, me personally, classical music (specifically cello music from the barroque period) really helps me focus

ALWAYS DO YOUR HOMEWORK, those are some of the easiest points to get

Finally, don’t be afraid to decorate your backpack! One of the funnest things of college to me (cause I was at a strict school for middle school and spent highschool in pandemic) has been to decorate my backpack with pins!

I’ve found a great thing about college is that genuienly no one cares about your interests and you can freely express yourself without fear of being bullied or ridiculed. Everyone is far too tired or focused to care. At least that has been my experience so far, be ridiculous if you like

I have ATLA pins, an asexual flag, spider-gwen, a matching carebear with my bestie, the school mascot and a dinasour (still looking for a winx pin)

I think that’s all I can come up with for now, so yeah, hope this helps and best of luck bestie!

#college life #college #I’ve been doing this far too long #Can yall tell im paranoid?#winx club #college advice

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rozeliyawashereyall · 15 days

Text

Guys I'm back (not really)!!! I missed you all so much and- oh wow I missed too much, huh.

I'll start with saying that I'm doing okay now! My mental health has improved a lot and I'm very proud of myself :) however! I'm still on break, I just came here to address a few things.

Now to what's happening in the bug army—and lemme just say jeez. I did not expect to come back to drama, especially with how small this sub fandom is.

English isn't my best language so hopefully I'm not being rude saying these-

Most of my information came from @audioroleplayconfessions and a few friends of mine

-Now~ about the discord server. A lot has happened and I won't be getting into too much detail about it. One or two of our members weren't in the best place and sought out help from me and a few others, they're both okay now and are getting proper help ^^

None of us are exactly okay in the head in the army, I don't mean "insane" I mean "just need a safe environment to vent". And that's exactly why the discord was made! But unfortunately it went past an after school comfort club and more of a therapy session.

Thankfully! Me and the mods are being especially stricter on the rules and are actively enforcing them better!

This is still our first time making a server so of course we aren't the best at it, but we're all trying! I do hope that anon can feel safe there again.

that's all I'll say about it, so let's close this topic already.

-The favoritism! Now sure what to say on this one tbh, just that no one owes you anything! If you're so insecure that you have to seek validation from strangers online—and having panic attacks that you aren't being noticed, maybe the problem is with you. Most of our amazing artists that get slightly more recognition is because they're one of the first batch of bugs to appear in this fandom!

It honestly just feels like you're putting the creators on a special pedestal, above everyone—while they're all very talented and incredible people, they're still human. Just like you, just like me. They try to interact with everyone they can and it's clear every person helping with the gator boys series is trying their damn best.

I genuinely do hope you're doing okay now though :(

I'm always here to help and support you if you need it! But now, it's best if you take some time off to focus on yourself! Take a mental health break, it'll do wonders to you, I would know! I'm taking one now ^^

-that one anon ask that was very clearly about me but they didn't say it.

I'm not too fussed up about it, just a little sad I made someone feel that way

I'm not sure what I did that gave you the impression of "annoying" and "pretentious" of me, but I'm really sorry that I did anyways. I do hope you'll still consider joining our little army, and so we too can be friends! I'm sure you're a great person!

Do know I'll always greet you and new members with open arms! <3

Oh and thank you so much to the people in the reblogs that defended me—giving you all the biggest digital hug ever

-and lastly~ I really, really hope none of us gave you a bad impression of us or the VAs! Everyone here is a wonderful person! From talented to kind to fun! Gator boys is an awesome series and we all just wanted to create a small group to fangirl and boy about it X3 I'll admit things have gotten a bit too far, but me and the founders are trying our best to keep everything under control.

Now, I'm not too good with words—but, I'm very sorry about everything that happened these few days, but I promise everything will be okay from now on! We'll all make sure of it!

Gonna be putting this post in my pinned for a week just in case-

#gator boys #the bug army #bug army #gatorboys fandom #genuinely so sorry this all happened #and sorry if this made you not want to join us or watch the series-#which you dont have to of course #just sorry if we gave you a terrible impression of us #everything will get better i promise!#I'll make sure of it.

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dontexpectmuch · 3 months

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Hii! I know I said it before but I genuinely do love your work, I couldn't stop thinking about it and it even inspired me to write some docs about Rúben [they're hidden in my drafts for now hehe]!

I said that I ranted about your neighbour!Rúben fic to my friend, and that a couple ideas sprouted into my mind.

My favorite idea was probably a part 3 with Rúben starting to pine after you and you also thinking about him in a similar/same way! I just thought it would be cute to see how Rúben would think about you and care for you in the slightest of ways [like how he would bring you dinner when you get home late, or offer to give you a ride to the university]. The way you ended part 2, telling Rúben that you appreciate him, felt like you deepened their relationship and perhaps the growing intimacy that they have.. especially the part with the eye contact.. the tension had me squirming and giggling!!

Part 3 could also go in a way where he starts to notice things about you that he didn't notice before, and you do the same. Although he's been to your apartment more than a few times, he's never really noticed the tinier things like how you have an extensive candle collection [you can never stop yourself from stopping in the home aisle and smelling different candles], or, for you, the way he has a few poetry books in Portuguese that he likes to read from time to time [who knew Rúben was quite the romantic?].

Obviously these are just a few ideas that you can implement into part 3, if you do happen to write it. But honestly whatever you do write would be amazing because you just have some sort of talent, something I can't really put my finger on but I want to keep coming back to read your work.

There is just this something about the way you structure, write and describe things that really immerse readers, like myself. It's almost like youve written this in a way that this exact situation could happen in real-life, it feels so seamless and natural to read.

I hope you are taking care of yourself and making sure that you're eating well and saying hydrated, especially in this summer heat! Make sure that you keep yourself happy and have a lovely day or night, much love and kisses 🩷

i actually feel so,, honored and proud that you talked to your friend about something that i wrote. just feels… surreal. and it makes me feel so happy and appreciated! seems like i do have a few good writing skills!!

generally, i always try to make my fics as natural as possible. i don’t think that those super detailed and maladaptive things are something that one might enjoy to read. that is why i try to make things happen in a natural environment! and it seems like you noticed it, which makes it all more worth it!

to be honest, i did think about making rúben fall for reader first, at the same time i am also someone that tries to portray the characters as realistic as possible. therefore, i believe that rúben would be very subtle when falling in love with someone.

next chapter would probably be in readers point of view! and i think reader is somewhat oblivious, or not really looking for something like that since she never really had the time to have a relationship.

but i love your points with rúben being kind and helpful towards her, noticing new stuff and all that!!

i genuinely thank you so much for your kind and encouraging comments, i hope u have the best day and maybe soon i’ll start working on the next part!!

#ruben dias x you #ruben dias fluff #ruben dias x reader #ruben dias imagine #ruben dias #rúben dias

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rems-writing · 4 months

Text

Oh ok. He's actually kinda hot

Pairing: dilf!Yunho x babysitter amab!reader

Summary: I decided to do something different. Most babysitter fics always have the babysitter as a female rather than a male. So lemme try my hand at this shit lol

Warning(s): Slight mentions of coercion, mentions of drinking, Yunho being an awesome and unbelievably fucking hot dad, slight hand kink but it's not really a kink persay

Genre: cracked beginning, angsty middle, fluffy ending, spicy moments all around

Nets: @blossomnet @mirohs-aurora-society

Thank you to @bunnliix and @holybibly for helping me out with the partial synopsis set up of this fic. 🤍❤️💗🩷

"MINGI, SO HELP ME GOD! PUT ME THE FUCK DOWN NOW!"

All you received was boisterous laughter on your end and a smack to your butt. You tried to punch whoever smacked your booty, but since you were hoisted over one of Mingi's broad shoulders, you didn't get a good look at who smacked your butt. However, you had a solid idea.

As you approach a big mansion, Mingi finally set you down and you proceeded to try and beat the ass of the person that smacked your butt.

Jung Wooyoung, your best friend.

"Oh come on now, y/n! Don't be such a sourpuss!"

"Especially since you have to babysit my best friend's daughters soon."

"I have to WHAT?!"

Wooyoung broke out in his iconic high-pitched laugh while Mingi was wheezing. You, on the other hand, were fuming.

"I did not sign up for this fuck ass babysitting job! Let me go now before -"

Mingi cut you off by ringing the doorbell multiple times. Then, he took Wooyoung's hand and sprinted away as fast as he could.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! I'MMA MESS UP YOUR DAMN ROOM AND COVER IT WITH FAKE SPIDERS WHEN YOU GET HOME FROM WORK!"

Even though they were far away to hear your threat, a new presence behind you chuckled smoothly and you froze momentarily before turning around and looking up slowly.

Oh.

So this is Mingi's best friend.

You gulped at the taller man before you and gave him a good once over.

He was wearing a regular suit and tie and his dark brown hair was swept back. He wasn't as broad as Mingi but he was still a bit lean with some muscle here and there. His warm brown eyes stared down at you in curiosity as he stuck a hand out for you to shake.

Said hand was big and veiny and his fingers were so nice to look at. You wondered what they would feel like wrapped around your throat -

'STOP IT, Y/N! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER! HE'S PROBABLY MARRIED!'

"But there's no ring though...'

'It doesn't matter! He probably doesn't even like guys that way so just stop!'

You snapped out of your daze for a moment and shook the older man's hand.

"Uh... hi. I'm Hong Y/N. I'm Mingi's cousin. And I guess I'm your new babysitter. Sorry if I'm super awkward right now. I didn't expect myself to land a babysitting job, but I'm more than willing to accept it since I do technically need a job and -"

The older man shushed you gently to stop your rambling and smiled kindly before allowing you to enter his beautiful home.

"By the way, my name is Jeong Yunho."

His deep voice rumbled throughout the emptiness of the house and it sent a pleasant shiver down your spine.

EVEN HIS NAME SOUNDED SEXY!

You turned around and smiled sheepishly before you saw him gesturing to a table. You assumed he wanted to interview you before he considered you for the job. You sat down at the table and he sat across from you before pulling out something from his briefcase.

When did you submit a resume?!

"Let's see here... 23 years old, graduated with a bachelor's degree in computer science. Currently unemployed as of the moment. Last job was at a tech company. You were let go due to... huh. Incompetence and refusal to take orders?"

Yunho was confused at that last part as he continued to speak and assess you.

"Based on your skills, it seemed you had a good understanding of the job environment and you were able to make a lot of money off this job. There must be some reason as to why you were let go."

You sighed and clutched the cardigan that you were wearing close to you. It was useless since it was loose and a part of it fell off your shoulder, causing some skin to be revealed. Yunho spotted this and he gulped nervously as sinful thoughts entered his mind.

'God he's so perfect. So pure and free of anyone that would dare corrupt him. Maybe I can be the one to make him my dirty angel...'

'No, stop it, Yunho! He's young! He would never settle for an old man such as yourself...'

He swallowed down the thoughts as he listened to you speak tentatively on why you were let go.

"Long story short, apparently my old boss had a crush on me back in the day and she asked me out. I politely declined her and told her I'm gay. She was confused but then she tried to 'persuade' me into giving her one chance to which I blatantly said no. She got angry and tried one more time, yet I shut her down with ease. In the end, she grew petty and fired me."

Yunho grew angry upon hearing the real reason for you being fired but he remained calm since you appeared to be unbothered by it.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Y/N. I'm glad to hear that you stood up for yourself but saddened to hear that it cost you your job."

"It's ok, sir. Karma backed me up since then. I read this morning that my old company's stocks have crashed and my boss got fired since someone reported her."

Yunho heard the happiness in your voice and his heart swelled with adoration for you. He stood up and stuck out his hand once more.

"You got the job, Y/N. Let me give the breakdown on how to take care of my three bundles of joy."

---------------------------------------------------

This babysitting job was easier than you would've expected. And it paid even more than your last job.

Yumi was the eldest of the three. She was six years old and a social butterfly just like her dad. And she was surprisingly mature for such a young age as well. You treated her more like an adult rather than a child and she was ok with that.

Yunju was the middle child of the three. She was three years old and a bit more on the shyer side, yet she warmed up to you right away. Your heart swelled up in adoration when the two sisters playfully fought out who got to play with you next.

Chanmi was the youngest of the three and was actually adopted. The little baby was abandoned by her parents and your heart broke a little when Yunho told you the story of how she came about. You were glad that Yunho adopted her and you were even more glad that you were taking care of her.

Yumi was busy putting Chanmi down for her nap so Yunju took the opportunity to get to know you better since Yumi already got to talk to you as soon as her dad left.

"So Yumi told me you were gay... what does that mean?"

You let out a slight laugh and grinned at the way Yunju tilted her head in curiosity.

"So you know how guys like girls in a romantic sense? Well, it's the same thing but instead of me liking girls, I like guys instead."

"Oh! So whenever you see a cute boy pass by, you get butterflies in your tummy?!"

"Something like that yes."

Yunho definitely gave you a lot more than just butterflies when you laid eyes upon him.

Yunju's eyes widened even more and she started bouncing up and down on the couch.

"So does that mean that you get butterflies whenever you're around daddy?!"

You almost spit out the tea that you were drinking but you composed yourself. You had no idea what to say to that. Luckily, you didn't have to since Yumi came around the corner and sat in between you two.

"Come on, Yunju! It's time to take a nap."

"But I want to hear more about Mr. Hong's fe-"

"And you will! Later though. You know you get cranky when you don't take a nap. Come on now."

Yunju pouted before sighing dramatically in defeat and climbing off the couch before sprinting to her room. Yumi sighed and looked at you.

"Sorry about her. She's just excited to finally have a babysitter that accepts all of us." She smiled sadly while you grew confused.

"Wait... what do you mean?" Your voice grew soft with concern as Yumi sighed.

"Before you came along, Mommy and Daddy were in love. But as soon as Daddy became the CEO of his company, that love started to disappear. They started fighting and I had to cover Yunju's ears since she's sensitive to loud noises so I had to be the one to endure the shouting and constant arguing. One day, Daddy came home and... and..."

She sniffled as she tried to get the words out while you remained patient and even gave her a tissue to use so she could wipe away her tears. Your heart was breaking every minute she spoke of how her family came to be.

"Daddy found Mommy with weird papers in her hand and all her bags at her side. Daddy was heartbroken when Mommy said something about divorce and how he never has time for her or something like that. After Daddy signed the papers, Mommy took them and left us. She... she didn't even say goodbye!"

Yumi was full on crying and you fought hard to keep your anger to yourself so you could focus on comforting the six-year-old. Despite the maturity that she displayed, she was still a young child at the end of the day that yearned for a complete family. Through her choked sobs, she kept speaking.

"From there, a lot of babysitters came and went. They were fine with Yunju and I at first, but when Chanmi came into the picture, that's where it went downhill again. They couldn't handle the screaming and crying of little baby Chanmi apparently which is stupid! Chanmi is just a baby!"

She huffed and crossed her arms to which you found adorable, but then you remembered one of Yunho's rules and you spoke softly to Yumi.

"I understand how you feel, but your dad doesn't want you saying words like that. Yunju might catch on and maybe Chanmi as well." You lectured her lightly and almost laughed when you saw the embarrassment on her face.

"Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry, Mr. Hong! I couldn't help it!" She whined and you chuckled softly before patting her head affectionately.

"It's ok. As long as you don't do it again, I'll let it slide. And I won't tell your dad."

Yumi nodded and a smile broke out on your face as she kept speaking.

"As I was saying, most babysitters never fully accepted the three of us. Until you came along. I know it's early, but I want you to stay for as long as you can. I like you, Yunju likes you, and Chanmi likes you. She hasn't cried the entire time you were here!"

Yumi hugged you tightly and you hugged her back. Yumi let out a small yawn and you chuckled to yourself.

"Why don't you take a nap this time? I'll keep an eye out for your younger siblings?"

Yumi nodded and placed her head in your lap before snoring lightly. You shrugged off your cardigan and draped it over her before staring off into space.

---------------------------------------------------

"Hey."

You groaned as you heard someone whisper in your ear. You shrugged it off, thinking you were imagining it. The voice came again.

"Hey, Y/N. Come on. It's time to wake up."

You groaned once more and kept sleeping.

"If you don't wake up, I'll kiss you awake. Come on now."

That shot you awake. As you sat upright, you looked around frantically for any sign of Yumi and her siblings, only to hear familiar shouting come from one of the rooms. You looked up and you were almost nose to nose with their sexy father.

"Uh... hi, sir."

Yunho suppressed the thoughts and smiled once more.

"You can just call me Yunho. And hey to you too. Had a nice nap?"

You blushed out of embarrassment as you put your cardigan back on.

"I'm sorry, Yunho. I didn't realize that I dozed off. It won't happen again."

Yunho let out a quiet laugh and shook his head.

"No worries. They can be a handful at times. Mingi is occupying them so you and I could talk."

You grew nervous as he said that. And it didn't help that his outfit changed yet he still looked good. He wore a brown sweater, gray sweatpants, and glasses. His dark brown hair was free from the confines of the hair gel that kept it up and it looked damp as well, indicating that he probably showered. His cologne was subtle yet it still smelled good. As he sat down next to you, he looked at you for a little bit with an unfamiliar expression in his eyes.

"Yumi and Yunju wouldn't stop talking about you. And it seems Chanmi has taking a liking to you as well with the way that she didn't cry once when you held her. I think I found the perfect match. But only if you want to stay. I would love for you to be a part of their lives, but if this is only temporary, then that's ok as well."

Despite the smile on his face, his eyes read a different story. You sighed quietly and looked into his eyes. You loved babysitting his kids. There was no way you could leave them after hearing their backstory. Without knowing it, you grabbed Yunho's hand and smiled.

"I want this to be permanent. I would like to keep this job."

Yunho's smile brightened and he brought into a hug. He was warm and you relished in it for a bit before pulling away.

"Welcome to the family, Y/N."

---------------------------------------------------

That was over a year ago. Ever since then, you've been a part of the Jeong family for as long as you can remember. Yumi, Yunju, and Chanmi were more than happy to hear that you were to be a permanent part of the family.

So you could imagine the looks on their faces when they had to be sent away one Friday night to have a sleepover with Mingi, his own kid, and a new boo he's been seeing apparently.

Chanmi was asleep in Mingi's arms, Yunju fought a little bit before giving up, and poor Yumi bit Mingi's hand before running back into the arms of her father and you. Yumi looked up at you with big shiny eyes. Out of all the Jeong daughters, she was the closest to you. You cooed softly at the sight and bent down to kiss her forehead.

"It'll be ok, Yumi. It's only for one night. Tomorrow, the five of us can spend the day together as a family. Ok?"

Yumi nodded sadly before holding out her pinky.

"Pinky promise?"

You interlocked your pinky with hers and smiled down at her.

"Pinky promise."

Yumi giggled shyly before running over to her uncle Mingi. As soon as the four of them left, Yunho shut the door behind him and stalked over to you. A lazy smirk was on his face as he grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it.

"Come now. Let's have dinner. We're finally alone."

---------------------------------------------------

A few minutes and several glasses of soju later, the two of you were seated on the couch, laughing at old memories that you two shared of each other. From Yunho meeting up with Mingi everyday to eat lunch together to your first encounter with Wooyoung, the night was filled with laughter and joy. A comfortable silence formed between the two of you yet you didn't mind. As you finished your ninth soju bottle, you saw that Yunho had closed his eyes for a bit as a way to probably sober up a bit. He was breathing in and out slowly, his glasses were perched on the top of his nose, and the tips of his ears were still red but it wasn't as bad as before. Your eyes then dragged over his form and you couldn't help but feel flustered just from looking at him.

He wore a light blue dress shirt with the top buttons loosened and black jeans that fit his slim legs well. His chest rose up and down slowly while his hands were on either side of him. Light snores escaped from him and you found that slightly cute. Fueled by the soju in your body, you leaned in to give him a small kiss on the cheek.

Imagine your surprise when you felt his lips on yours.

You pulled away but not entirely since you felt his hands on your waist and your body pulled flush against his own. His eyes opened slightly and a smirk was on his face.

"Hey."

"Um... hi."

Your soft voice caused Yunho to chuckle and bring into a hug, his face being buried in the crook of your neck. Your blush worsened due to the close proximity between the two of you. He then pulled away and stared deeply into your eyes.

"May I confess something to you?" He asked quietly and you nodded.

"I think I've fallen for you. No wait. I have fallen for you. I fell for you when you first walked into my home. And those feelings developed into something more when I came home and saw my eldest laying comfortably against you."

Your heart rate increased as he kept talking but you found his hands slowly slipping away from you. You were about to protest lightly from the lack of warmth he provided when you saw him put his face in his hands.

"Sadly, I can't have you. You deserve more than just an old man like me. You deserve to be with someone who will come home to you and will give you their undivided attention."

When you heard the first sniffle, you immediately wrapped your arms around him. Yunho held you back as he continued.

"I tried so hard every day to make sure I came home on time for dinner, tuck the kids in bed, and kiss my wife goodnight before going to sleep beside her so she can wake up to me in the morning. However, it just wasn't enough for her. Hence, the fighting and whatnot. I'm sure Yumi told you everything."

"Yeah. She did."

"The next thing I know, she's divorcing me. Talking about how she doesn't want to be held back by someone who prioritizes work over family when that was never the case!"

Yunho was full on sobbing now and all you could do was shush him and tell him that everything is ok. He kept speaking.

"From there, I hired so many people to babysit my daughters but they never seemed to stick around for long." He raised his head to look at you.

"Until you came along."

He smiled weakly as he continued to speak.

"You've been understanding of my situation and never once complained about my kids or the weird schedule and so on. You've been so kind, patient, and loving. That's why... I confess my love to you. Aside from you doing an excellent job at babysitting, you're witty, intelligent, and so carefree of everything. Which leads me to ask you this."

He held your hands in his.

"Why do you stick around for an old man like me? You could've been out there, finding new job opportunities and dating people your age. Yet here you are, in the arms of someone like me. Why is that?"

You sighed shakily as you pondered your answer. You decided to tell the truth.

"While I love working with computers, sometimes, computer science takes a toll on the mind. Plus, sitting in front of a computer screen 24/7 for hours on end with countless stacks of paperwork becomes too boring. Being around your kids brought me life. Also, if I may, I've fallen for you as well. I figured you wouldn't want someone as young as me. But seeing as you've returned the feelings, I couldn't be happier."

Yunho's heartrate increased as you told him that you felt the same way. His eyes darted to your lips momentarily before looking at you once more. He was still a bit drunk, but he was sober enough to remember this.

"May I...?"

You nodded and felt your heartrate increase when he leaned in and kissed you on the lips for the second time.

His lips were soft and plush against your own and his hands held your waist with a gentle yet firm grip. As he held you close to him, you felt the love and passion he had for you in this kiss.

You were finally home.

#blossomnet #mirohsaurorasociety #ateez #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader

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mcytconfession · 5 months

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There are YouTuber out here PLOTTING ON PEOPLE'S DOWNFALL FOR THERE OWN GAIN AND IT'S DISGUSTING

Last year there were (fake) allegations about Smajor1995 regarding a 12 year old. The person behind the account who claimed to be a victim was 24 years old. 2.4.

And it was recently talked about in a group discord that I reported the high hell's of, THEY DID IT BECAUSE THEY WANTED HIS CLOUT

Then there was tubbo and the Emma social experiment. I also had the misfortune of talking to someone who knew they person personally, they downplayed it and said he couldn't do anything cause they were in Russia, I report all this to a Tubbo mod.

I remember seeing the Shelby situation and after that came out, it being confirmed and stuff, she start supporting others. Like anyone would do. But Caiti USED THE SITUATION TO HER ADVANTAGE AND BLINDSIDED EVERYONE, TAKING ADVANTAGE OF SHELBY'S AND AIMSEY KINDNESS!

This then created an environment were shelby didn't support anyone else in fear of it happening again and Freddie being thrown under the rug.

Then recent a Vtubers called Kenji was doxx, humiliated and harassed by his former mods and HIS OWN BEST FRIENDS, who prayed on his downfall so that they could take his place and be more popular. When getting called out they gave the shittiest excuse possible, "Oh I needed to better myself as a person" and "oh I needed it to be said outloud to know it was wrong"

HOW UNFUNNY, UNORIGINAL AND FUCKING CRUEL DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO PRAY ON SOMEONE'S DOWNFALL TO CLAIM THERE COMMUNITY?!

They are willing to make fake situations of victims and normal, innocent people to steal there clout and fame.

The MINUTE a famous person opens a discord server and is active with there community they're putting themselves at risk of something happening.

People like Goodtimeswithscar and Jimmy Solidaritygaming consider NOT having a twitter account in fear of this happening.

Grian has openly REFUSED to use twitter or have a active discord server because of this.

Smajor1995 doesn't interact on discord much because of this people.

People like Dream have had to abandoned server and projects in fear of bs happening.

How do we live in a world were people are praying on there downfall and using public ways to communicate with people as there source of "evidence"???

Those people deserve nothing but thr respect they have for others. That being none at all.

[Tw suicide mention]

Don't forget Inquisitor [A tiktok cosplayer] who killed himself live bc a group of people edited screenshots of him to make him appear as a creep.

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stvrlight-nyx · 6 months

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My interpretation of Murder Drones episode 7(a lot about N and Uzi) EPISODE 7 SPOILERS‼️‼️

N is the most caring drone ever, he cares so much about V (friendship) that first thing he can think about is trying to move the rocks to get back to her. After all the shit she put him through, he still thinks of her as one of his closest friends besides his old crush on her. HES JUST SUCH AN ANGEL OMG.

N’s direct-ness towards Tessa is very interesting, because you can see his character wants to really help “Tessa” (who we now know was never actually Tessa), but obviously cares and loves Uzi a lot whether that be platonic or romantic. He clearly emphasises his point by putting a full stop at the end, making it clear to Tessa that he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to Uzi. Taking it back to my point about N having to choose between Tessa and his family from back in Manor House, or Uzi this “little bot” that in my opinion he’s poured his heart out to (coming from a Nuzi shipper and no it’s not pro ship). Well we now know that after the whole absolute solver using Cyn as a host and Tessa as a skin suit that he is 100% on Uzi’s side.

YOU ARE TELLING ME THIS MAN DIDN’T KNOW IF HE WAS GONNA LIVE OR NOT AND THE FIRST PERSON HE CALLED OUT TO WAS UZI LIKE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Anyway yea so uh, you can see here that N’s first thought and in past episodes too, his first thought is Uzi. Clearly showing he cares for her and loves her a lot. Usually you brain or in their case their programming should probably make you think about yourself but, he often thinks about Uzi first and then himself like N just confess istg.

I don’t really wanna go through it now maybe in another post but it has to be here so…

J oh deary me J. J is the kinda of character who clearly has always been jealous of N, and how fond Tessa was of him compared to her. Obviously, because you can clearly even as the audience see that Tessa doesn’t really care too much about J, she clearly has to receive the approval from someone else. And that’s where the company comes in, in my opinion I think the company is just feeding her ego so she begins to do more for them. The company had control over V and N previously but because of their exploration and independence they now know the truth but, because of J’s hunger for approval she is turning a blind eye towards her curiosity.

The idea that this isn’t even “The real Tessa” is wild to me, you’re telling me the solver literally an eldritch entity can adapt to humane environments, features, and characteristics that easily. If I were Uzi I’d be wetting myself right now. For me what I would really like to see is the solver disinfecting everyone(or like collecting itself) and somehow disconnecting itself from Cyn and Tessa cus I don’t think it will be able to operate without a host and skinsuit.

DOLL A LITRAL ICON AND GIRLBOSS. Her ideas of the absolute solver while also trying to use it to her advantage is really interesting, it’s crazy that she knew everything but didn’t tell Uzi. Some may argue with me and say ‘oh but doll did it to avoid Uzi ratting her out’ which is correct but, do you think it would alter the storyline if she did? I think it would. Some more question I would’ve asked doll are things like

Do you expect to defeat the solver alone? After defeating the solver what are your theories for a cure? And why do you look good doing everything?(shes so cool)

I am not really talking heavily about Nori right now cuz she deserves her own post but, the notes behind her are really cool to me. Like did she know about the absolute solver and the involvement with the disassembly drones and JcJ? But that’s kinda it

AGAIN N THINKING ABOUT UZI BEFORE HIMSELF AND OTHERS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Apparently can only add ten images so I’ll do a part 2

Reblogs>>>>likes

#stvrpost #murder drones nuzi #tessa james elliot #j murder drones #murder drones theory #n murder drones #murder drones uzi #murderdrones #murder drones v #disassembly drone #worker drone #lizzy murder drones #doll murder drones #murder drones n #murder drones j #murder drones

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crookedkryptonitebeliever · 2 months

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First I must make it clear that I came for Yves, stayed for Cyprus, and found Mont to be my true love. And Blanche as my confusing friend in the midst.

As a new fan that has been searching through this all, my knowledge isn't the best but I'm trying.

Yves is so interesting but also expansive that I'm having a bit of a hard time grasping it all. He's your personification of infallible unconditional love that people can display right? The mother of mothers.

Yet I can't find myself wanting to be open or close to him even with the knowledge that he won't judge me or that he'll take care of me like I dream of. Almost like I'm expecting him to be this way because I'm already viewing him in that parental role since I can't find mysel liking him romantically.

In contrast the thought of Cyprus doing the chores and cooking like in the Yandere coworker series, it gives me a warm giddy feeling like most yanderes would for me. Because I view him in a more romantic light.

I think that says a lot about how he's written and portrayed subconsciously by you. Since I read about him hating children and pets making me decide not to pursue him romantically it made me view all the other works of him differently.

But what I also found jarring due to that view is the first chapter of [the best and worst of both worlds] where he's so flirty and fun while the reader is this nervous failure in response.

From what I've seen Yves wants to mother and while you did say he would change himself for the reader, he wouldn't upheaval himself.

So what does he do when the reader is someone who wants to mother someone else, much like that one ask about Yves being a monster in law against Monty.

Now that was Yves just not being with reader and reader already with Monty. So if [tbawobw] (I'm sorry lol) had a far more put together reader that didn't stalk or fawn over Yves, how would he go about getting their attention?

Another thing I want to question is about Yves with a guarded reader. Now we know that he's 'okay' (debatable) with a reader that just chooses to keep him as a friend. And that if reader would hate who Yves is as a person, he would manipulate the environment to get their views to broaden before approaching.

But Yves with a reader who is very friendly, warm and caring to everyone but will not get close to them. Texts are dry, conversations never steer into Reader's personal life, such questions get obviously ignored or clearly told 'I'm not comfortable with that' and reader keeps even family apart mentally from their inner thoughts and feelings.

Now Yves has all the info, he's Yves but it means nothing if he can't get the reader to actually open up to him even when they do meet. They could be near homeless and still say 'I'll be fine, [insert clear conversation chang].'

Sure he can gift them all the money and gifts, they'll accept and use it. Only telling him that they used it wisely and appreciated his kindness before keeping the convo minimal. The kind of reader that has no shame in telling Yves that they feel uncomfortable with his amount/type of questions and/or visits.

So let's say he drives them into a corner, not too traumatizing but enough so that reader is forced in his vicinity when they breakdown from stress. He comforts them, reassures them, helps them and what happens?

The exact same thing. And if he does ask why they won't let him of all people close even when he is the first person that reader has broke down in front of, the response he gets is a 'I have never seen you become as unstable as I was in front of you. That dynamic felt unfair and uneven so I'd rather us return to our old one where we both were equals without faults.' and they just end it saying they understand if Yves doesn't want to be friends anymore.

What does he do then? He won't break down, he promised himself after all he's been through. So faking a breakdown won't work but just telling false information doesn't work either. Anymore traumatizing could be permanent too.

Yves could just use his drugs and subtle mind control thing that I'm still not really sure how it works, to nudge reader to accept his kindness. But we've seen it with Yandere Brother before, where some people are stubborn enough to require direct methods. Reader could have that same mental fortitude.

AND we all know this situation would be killing Yves, as he loves to coddle and mother reader. Would sending anyone ahead of himself before they meet even work? Only Yves would have the means necessary to make reader break down and someone else comforting them, someone who does break down in front of reader too making it 'equal' earning Reader's trust and closeness would only backfire.

Because now Reader would have someone to turn to for their emotional needs. Even if Yves killed that person off, Reader would just grow even colder to everyone outside of themself.

If he went the drugging then it goes back to reader continuously only giving in when having breakdowns/being drugged. Both which are harmful long term. And mainly that reader isn't truly turning to Yves out of their own violation but out of habit. It becomes emotionless, almost like a chore. They find no real comfort in Yves fixing their problem or caring for them or being with them. The true reader is even more guarded to him.

I feel like this dynamic would be very depressing for him, this situation in whole would be triggering Yves motherly instincts on full throttle while not letting him do as he wishes to help.

But yeah I only know so much so if there's another ask that goes on this road just link it for me please. If not, I would love to hear your take on how Yves would handle it.

Shifting to another point of Yves, lets rewind to how Yves actually feels not being readers partner. We know he won't date them if they can't handle not having sex or not being faithful.

He becomes the monster in law but there's 3 specific post that I really want to focus on. 1 - how Yves reacts to a respectful reader that ends the relationship 2nd date due to the sex. 2 - how he reacts to Monty being the husband. 3 - a post about how being just the friend is killing Yves in the inside. [the one comparing him to Pearl from SU]

So going for 1, in the post Yves is all 'okay' and smiles and just wants to be close with reader. And it's very clear that reader would have dated Yves if not for the sex. Yves vets all the possible partners for the future and only allows the one that fits his standards to stay.

But then it all comes crashing down when we get to 2.

This scenario doesn't touch on how the timing between Reader meeting Yves and Monty. It seems to imply that the whole sex thing wasn't a factor.

As previously stated, he feels that Monty is bad and absolutely nothing good but Yves pushes himself to get along somewhat with Monty to make reader happy. Monty is a yandere and honestly? A big variable at first since Monty's obsession with reader is pure chance.

So if reader is more put together then [tbawobw] leading to a more subby and controllable Monty making them much more compatible without Yves romantically in the mix. Reader could get attached and start dating Monty before Yves can gather enough info against Monty that ultimately doesn't matter because all Monty cares about is reader.

(and my computer is dying, I should speed this up)

Now in the 2 post, Yves has this breakdown about why reader didn't want to be with Yves in all his perfection and instead went with Monty who is his opposite. He says that they could have chosen someone better.

But what exactly does that mean for Yves?

Now on the surface it's just that Yves really wants reader to have the best possible and be well taken care of since Yves can't be their partner due to sex. But that isn't really how he feels. If reader chose a 'good husband' Yves could at least pretend like it doesn't bother him much.

But he just can't with Mont, not with the differences between them. Yves glaring hatred for not being readers husband, for having it taken from him in general is made so obvious and that. That right there is what's pushing him to breaking down in the form that he hates.

Post 3 confirms it all. But it doesn't bring up the topic of sex. Something that he already has so much trauma with. It's hard not to bring up some self loathing even though Yves (rightfully) wouldn't change his boundaries.

So in the worst case scenario, a guarded reader that I described above, rejects Yves respectfully due to the sexual incompatibility, proceeds to open up naturally to MONT and marry him keeping Yves always as a friend at best.

Just how deep in hell is his life? Would something like this expose new actions from Yves? I, uh, do have one more thing about Yves but I think I should just send it like this. It's long enough.

W anon

holy shit W anon u put the W in win bro

a WHOLE ASS THESIS omg thank u so much i love analyses holy crap like a whole well structured and well written essay on Yves's character and his complex feelings of being cucked

ultimately he wants you to be happy, but technically faking breakdowns can work if he does it convincingly enough. His breakdowns will never be about his TRUE past traumas. He thinks you're too delicate and innocent to handle that without accidentally traumatizing yourself too. HOWEVER, he may give you very ,very watered down concepts of what had happened to him- or downright fake events.

He would stage slips of sanities strategically and breakdowns too to coax you out of that shell. But not too much to raise suspicion out of you. Just enough to manipulate you into thinking he can be anything less than perfect. Remember, he's a terrific actor. Anything vulnerable about Yves is probably not real and is probably a highly calculated move

but yes, let's say you rolled a nat 20 on perception checks every time and you caught his bullshit, and he KNOWS that you will catch onto it, AND you fell in love with Monty because he's not fancy pants rich mcgee.... its spirituality and religion time. He will be literally doing black magic rituals just to keep himself in check, he knows that it probably won't help, but this is just for him to not fall into the abyss of despair and insanity, just to retain his sense of self in a reality that loves to erode it exponentially.

so basically, rule of thumb for Yves: if it's anything that he cannot solve without either destroying his boundaries or destroying your happiness, he's drawing those fucking sigils on his attic floor with his blood, lighting candles n shit (just like when you want to die while suffering from dementia, but he keeps you alive because he's selfish)

#oc Yves

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drunknillawafer · 2 months

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right down the line: zuko x firebender!reader | part 4

You grew up close to the Royal Family due to your father's position as a General, but you ran away from home after the agni kai against your best friend. Now, you've joined the Gaang and plan on doing your part in ending the 100-year war.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5

helloo here is part 4... thank u for the support so far! i can feel my writing getting better... hopefully you guys like this part hehe... the next one is going to be so... angst... so... zuko... so stay tuned! again i do not own these characters or the atla world >.< enjoy! about 2,491 words & not really proofread at the end sorryyy

⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

It was unbearable those first few months, before the move to the Earth Kingdom village. Previous defiance of locking myself in my chambers was a reactive solution to a persistent problem: The Fire Nation. No, I would need a more permanent answer to my problems if I craved peace of mind.

Since the moment Zuko’s screams embedded themselves into my brain, constantly replaying in a cycle of distress, I had not been able to sleep. I would lay down on the large bed with a wine-colored duvet and matching pillow-sheets, hoping the softness would swallow me whole. Take me to a different place than my home.

A lot of things would stop me from the bliss of sleeping.

One of them being my father. He was never one to share a lot with his daughter, let alone exchange kind words or attentive praises. He’s an important man with serious tasks, as he would put it. He doesn’t have time to watch my new fire-bending move or sword progress or whatever it was he most definitely didn’t care for. Over the years, I grew accustomed to our silent agreement. Happily, even. He’ll provide for me, give me everything I ask for, and allow me the freedom of my personal life if I excel in everything that it is I do, surpassing the royal heir’s skills in bending, swords, and education. I suppose it’s why he didn’t care for my special relationship with Zuko. He’d only see it as a move to get ahead in life.

It's what made him such a good General to the Fire Lord.

It shouldn’t have been surprising that he would force me to go to the agni kai. It shouldn’t knock the wind out of my lungs every time I relive the memory of realization that I’d be watching Zuko.

But it does. I couldn’t wrap my head around why. Why did he make me witness such an awful thing?

When sleep did come, I was rewarded with solace. Dreams of flashbacks, a time when I foolishly believed my father cared about the only child he had. There is this one recurring dream that I close my eyes and wish to come every night when I attempt to rest.

The first thing I see is the shamrock grass, crunching beneath my feet. Slowly, the environment pieces together as I fall deeper into my slumber. I see the stone as I walk forward, trading in the pasture for sleek, grey pavement.

Three more steps, and I reach the pond I know so well. This is when comfort finds its way back into my body. I take a deep breath and sigh; I am at the Royal Palace’s turtle duck pond.

Zuko walks up beside me in my dreamland, interlocking his fingers with mine. We stand side-by-side in silence, soaking in the seconds we are in each other’s hands. For a moment, I can believe this is my reality and there is no waking up from this.

Tears form in my eyes and the world around me is suddenly becoming foggy. The green washing away with the grey, becoming blurs in the distance. I can only see Zuko, and he is looking at me, and we are so beautiful.

I wake with a gasp from the one bliss in the round ‘o’clock torture I receive and begin the cycle again. Sometimes I lay back down and wish to return, other times I just lay awake and contemplate what I’m going to do about the pain. The truth.

Years of propaganda washed away in a single decision of the brutal man that calls himself my father. I can finally see clearly. The Fire Nation is a plague to the world, we’re not sharing our greatness. We’re a disgrace to life, and we deserve every bit of shame at our doorsteps.

I’m ashamed to be from this nation, and a fire-bender. A gift that could be warmth is destruction and chaos and terror. Who would ever want to be all those things when we could choose to be soft?

What is one girl’s opinion against a whole nation. A melancholy, depressed, broken-hearted girl at that. They’d never take me seriously. I’d have to try my chances with the outside world. Maybe I could hide my bending, pose as a swordswoman, find a group of some kind. A group who sees things as I do.

My body relaxes at the thought of a solid plan. I don’t know how I’m going to manage it but, I’m leaving the Fire Nation. And I am not looking back.

Jeong-Jeong’s headquarters were built on a piece of land peeking through a steady river. It was a small, tan-colored shack with many similar structures built around it. It was a sort of community of Fire Nation deserters who did not wish to be found.

Katara, Aang, Sokka, and I were taking a pit-stop here to let Master Jeong-Jeong teach the Avatar how to fire-bend.

While the rest of them were by the river, fishing, water-bending, or learning from the Master, I was alone, pacing back and forth from tree to tree deeper into the forest, wondering what to do.

If things here don’t work out for Aang, who would be left to teach him? Fire Nation deserters are not common and those who are fire-bending masters less so. My original plans no longer worked. It wasn’t about hiding my identity and being with the Freedom Fighters anymore. Now, my mind is set on helping Aang take down the Fire Lord.

I just kept stalling it. I hadn’t practiced my bending in front of people for years and suddenly I had to help a twelve-year-old take down an empire. Maybe Jeong-Jeong could do it for me, maybe not.

But one thing was clear: it was time to come clean to my friends. The days keep moving and the nights keep passing, and I’m becoming a part of their group just as quickly. I was never meant to keep this all to myself.

They aren’t like Jet. They can handle it, they can see. They would understand because they’re not here to cause more pain, harm, or war. They know me, they know I want to have peace as much as they do. The worst thing that could happen was I’d be off on my own again, but at least this way, I’d be honest.

Walking back in the direction of Jeong-Jeong’s hide out, I spotted Katara and Sokka by the river on their own. They were giving Aang his own space with his teacher, a few hundred feet away.

“Hey, Y/N, where’ve you been?” Katara asks, as she practices a bending move she’s working on. The water moves gracefully knowing it’s safe in her hands.

“Just… over there…” Awkwardly, I gesture with my hand to the forest.

Holding his fishing pole, Sokka raises his eyebrow at my poor attempt at a smooth reply. “Right… over there.”

I sit down on a log stump between Sokka and Katara and stare at the water for a moment. Is it really necessary that I do this? Do they have to know, I question in my mind.

Yes, of course, the sane part of my brain answers. Anything to stop the Fire Lord, anything to put an end to all of this. Remember? My conscious tells me. I do.

“I have to tell you something.” I finally say.

Sokka and Katara glance at each other, confusion radiating out of their eyes.

“What is it, Y/N?” Katara asks. She allows the water to flow back into the river, pausing her bending practice to sit down on the log stump next to me. She nods in encouragement. Sokka’s standing on my left, waiting patiently for my words.

“I want to start with- I made the decision a long time ago to hide when I was hurt and lost,” I pause. Sokka tilts his head, still confused. “When I was thirteen, I saw my best friend get burned by his own father in an agni kai. An agni kai is a traditional fire-bender duel won when one opponent burns the other.” Trembling, I let the words come out. “It shattered me. I was never the same.”

“So, you’re Fire Nation?” Sokka asks. I look up at him and see his face. A new kind of hurt was washed on it. When it comes to them, that hurt can mean a million instances of violence.

Looking back at the river, I confess. “Yeah, and a fire-bender. I ran away from home a few months after it happened, when my father and I moved to an Earth Kingdom village. The same village you helped save, Sokka.” The compliment does little to distract him from the truth I just spilled. “I found Jet and the Freedom Fighters, and they helped me. They gave me a bed, food, and a home. But then Jet turned out to be…” Katara winces. It goes without saying how my former leader betrayed his values. “You guys know he would never accept me, so I hid my true self. And I don’t want to keep secrets anymore. We have the chance to stop the Fire Lord here, and I want to do everything I can to help. As someone born in the Fire Nation, I have to restore our honor.”

The two siblings remain quiet for a moment, processing the new information. Katara is the first to speak. “You're a victim too. They’re just as violent with their own.” She puts a hand on my shoulder, comforting me after rambling out my past.

Sokka walks away, barely letting the dirt and sticks make noise under his steps.

“Sokka!” Katara calls out to him. She gets ready to follow him but I stop her.

“I’ll go.” I reassure. She nods and sits back down, watching her friend and her brother walk away.

After we’re out of Katara’s sight, Sokka stops in his tracks with a couple of feet in between us. I want to give him the space he needs.

Sokka turns around, his eyes instantly meeting mine. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.” He says, calming the stampede of anxiety in my veins.

Softly, I reply. "I'm sorry too."

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I… was so used to hiding. It’s my first time telling anyone since I left.” I explain. His arms are folded, creating an imaginary barrier between us.

“I should know that the girl I like is Fire Nation! It's very conflicting!” He exasperates. We both let the blood rush to our cheeks about the nature of his feelings.

We hadn’t really talked about it since he told me back at Aunt Wu’s village. There were small things, though. Miniature movements and gestures told me things had changed. Like when he brought me a rock that reminded him of my eye color or brushing his hand against mine when we walked side-by-side. Sokka and I could train in swords while Katara teaches Aang what she knows. He’s learned some of my sparring tricks, I’d have to switch it up on him soon. But it was diverting. At the sight of his ocean eyes, I’d turn into a softer version of myself. One I lost amid the chaos.

“Well, it’s not like I’ve been there recently! Maybe that’s why you didn’t detect me!” I say, keeping it playful. He shoots a direct glance at me, letting me know he’s being serious. I drop the jokes. “I hope we can still be… okay, though.”

“We’re okay, it’s just going to take some adjusting. I mean, you used to be our enemy… But I trust you, ever since Jet.” He uncrosses his arms and plants them by his side. “Is there anything else? I’m not going to find out you have a pet dragon, right?”

“No,” I reply, stepping toward him and closing the space in between. “Not that I know of anyway.” My footsteps stop a few inches away and I smile up at him. The tension from my confession has dissipated into the air, becoming part of the clouds, and now there’s just a little bit of space between us.

“Good, I couldn’t handle that.” A smile is fighting to erupt on his face.

I swear he’s about to lean in when-

Katara screams in pain from the direction of the river. Our bubble of infatuation is popped, and we dash back to Jeong-Jeong’s hideout.

As we rush in, I see Katara holding her hands close to her chest and a fearful Aang. Jeong-Jeong’s face says it all. He burned her.

Sokka's overprotective nature takes over. “Look at what you did! I told you we shouldn’t have come here!” He runs to his sister’s side, but she hides her hands away from him. Probably to protect the wound and… Aang.

“Katara, I’m sorry!” Aang pleads.

In a crying hurry, she runs away. Sokka motions to follow her but I stop him. “I’ll go, you calm down. Be easy on him.”

He huffs at me. “Fine.”

☆

Katara’s leaning over the river when I first spot her. Her hands are in the water, flashing a white light as her cries soften. She doesn’t notice me.

I step closer as I watch her witness the glow. Once the light dims and she pulls her hands out, I have a chance to speak.

“That’s a healing ability.” My voice catches her by surprise, but it doesn’t affect her any more than her new-found skill. “Water-benders are gifted with the ability to heal wounds. It’s like a medicine.” I explain.

“How do you know this?” She asks. I sit down next to her as she’s resting on her ankles, both of us facing the continuous river. If we followed it in the other direction, we could find Jeong-Jeong’s hideout again.

“My father always told me to fight your enemy, you must know your enemy. So, I learned a lot about the rest of the elements. Your basic aristocratic education at home. Didn’t someone teach you?” I question.

“No.” She looks down at her hands. “My mother died in a Fire Nation raid. They took all our water-benders.” The pain contorts her face. I see.

“Is that why Sokka reacted like that?”

“Yeah.” She nods.

“Oh.” Seconds of silence pass, letting our recent exchange process in our minds. I attempt to make her feel better. “Water can heal, it’s lucky. All fire seems to do is destroy.”

“It’s powerful.” Katara says.

“He didn’t mean to hurt you, yaknow.” I defend the young Avatar. “Without proper control, it can get out of your hands. Then, all you can do is sit and stand. It’s not like the other elements.”

“Maybe Jeong-Jeong was right, maybe Aang isn’t ready to fire-bend.”

“I don’t think he is.”

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