#and i will. put this in the tag so i can find it later. for hubris related reasons
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I was just gonna put this in the tags, but maybe this will help someone else to share my story if anyone else feels less alone. And it got long. I was a valedictorian in highschool. I would not recommend it.
Take it from me-- Do well in school, absolutely. Please try to do well in school. Please. But Do Not let it destroy your mental health the way I let it. I had a very unhealthy relationship with it and tied it to my self worth.
(Story time under read more if it helps anyone)
Oversharing time-- it was my priority in highschool. It was a goal I set for myself to prove I could do it, and if I didn't, I think I saw myself as a failure. This was mostly self imposed, and theres probably a psychological explanation for this I wont get into for the sake of length. But I thought if I could at least do this, I had something on paper that I could point to for myself in a sort of external self validation or worth. "I dont know what metric to gauge myself on, but at least I accomplished this". Call it a method of self soothing, I suppose.
It led to almost daily panic attacks that I could not publically control. The whole nine yards, too. It was exhausting and physically draining. If I were honest with me-- I isolated myself. More human contact, more going out with friends, more of me being the one to make the point of reaching out to other people would have made a world of a healthier difference. My focus might not have been so singular and borderline obsessive because it was the only thing i held onto. It put me in a horrible place mentally, and it has severely affected my adult life. I am still trying to unlearn the "if I mess up learning how to do this on the first try, i am a failure" when its like....just learning how to pipe icing on cupcakes or something. I tied my worth to my ability to learn, and that can become extremely unhealthy in a hurry. Especially when I already had mental health issues that were at odds with learning quickly-- like panic attacks that come on fast and wipe my memory and ability to think clearly. Its like I chose the hardest thing for my brain to do, and that was the metric I weighed my self worth on.
What I told myself at the time was some variation of "if I do this, i'll have the best chance at financial support or a full ride for college." That doing this means I will become self sufficient.
That's not how it works, and thats not how it worked.
I got a $1k grant, which was nice, but nowhere near the full ride or anything close to the "heavens of opportunity rain down upon me" sort of thing I had hoped for in my head.
Valedictorians make for good metrics for the school. Attendance records make for good records for the school. Not in any way saying kids SHOULDN'T try to do well in school (please for the love of god, we need every scrap of education we can get in this country), but please find a healthy medium too.
Doing well enough in school and not letting it destroy your mental health do not have to be mutually exclusive. A 3.5 is probably good enough. That was the cut off for one of my bigger transfer scholarships later down the road, transfering from one college to another. Nowhere did I have to continue maintaining a 4.0.
Besides. I didnt get a 4.0 by retaining functional information. I got it by gaming the system of how testing worked.
The example I use is a very dry history class in college I had. Our final exam was the culmination of all of our final tests. Same questions, same answers. I did not remember the content. I did not learn anything. What I did? I remembered the first three words of the question and the first three words of the answer, and remembered them by association. And then I forgot it all within the hour.
In the meantime, foster your friendships. Good friendships. This can create business connections in the future. Kindness and community will get the majority of people further in life than being any kind of top of your class, I promise you.
But most of all, be kind to yourself and treat yourself gently.
are you or have you ever been a straight-A student?
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My first spy x family post that I write.
Honestly, I wish Anya could have some friends from outside of Eden like just playmates and acquaintances, like playground bodies or friends with Authen’s grandkids, not deep friendships just some kids that are in the some social circle like her family.
They play games like tags, hide and seek all the little things like breaking friendship seals, their turn of phrase in their age, and playing pretend. And later Anya will want to play tag and hide and seek with their parents when her friend isn’t around. At first Loid and Yor just use one percent of their skills to play hide and seek but surprisingly find out Anya is pretty good as a seeker because of her power then they slowly increase their skills in the game when Yor is the seeker she surprised by how good Loid at hiding she can’t sense his presence so she getting into thorn princess mode a bit just to find him but didn’t question why her husband was able to hide so good that matching her profession, meanwhile Twilight is feeling lacking practice that his wife and daughter can find him so quickly, becoming to have spy existential crisis, and when Twilight is the seeker it panics thorn princess, even more, she got discovered quick by Loid no matter where she hides! But either is questioning why they are this good.
And the tag is where it got intense, Yor sneaks up on Loid quite often when she is it and Twilight’s lack of practice feeling is back, and how the hell is this man be so fast to get out of her reach right before the tag? When Loid is it, he knows his wife is quick so he has to predict her next moves to tag her, and that makes Yor feel unease, being predictable is a death sentence in her career, and somehow her husband knows her every move!
Slowly they keep putting more percentage of their skills when playing tag1% -> 5% 10-> 20 -> 50 -> 80 % and Anya has been tagged so early on and is watching this show all excitedly “Waku waku!” and it all happens in the spend of 15 minutes.
And somehow it helps them in their next missions.
That is what happens when you play kids' games with people who are the best of the best in the field of assistant and spy, you sharpen your skill without even realizing it. The couple still didn't realize their fake spouse having all of these abilities to counter their field of work is not normal.
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THANKSGIVING MOOTIE APPRECIATION ❤️✨❤️
Happy thanksgiving y'all! And a good time zone to all my non-US/non-Turkey day havers lovelies!
Tis the season of thanks and I'm a very thankful goober this year! I only started getting active on Tumblr about half a year ago and there's already so many people and things I'm grateful for from this site alone! I've enjoyed so much art and events, participated in yap seshes, tag games, and ultimately felt pretty welcomed and at home on this site, and it's thanks to all you! <3<3<3
Special thanks to the DCA fandom in its entirety as well! All the discussions, artists, writers, and shared reposts with all the silly notes are awesome! Y'all inspire me all the time and make me wish I was more outgoing than I am just so I can say hello to each and every one of you!!!!
The list gets long, so for the sake of those scrolling by, I have put it below! Have a lovely day everyone! <3333
@midnight-mourning Your writing is just wonderful. It's everything!!! I adore it so much and your CS boyos have wormed their way into my heart and refuses to leave. Some of my favorite songs even remind me of them! (Don't tell Moon this but I am very attached to CS Sun-)(Honestly gotta be my favorite Sun I've read fr fr) Also! Thank you for just being so supportive, thinking about me in tag games, and giving ALL the tag notes! They're a wonder to read and have me bounce off the walls! I'm always so happy we're mooties! ❤️❤️❤️ (Also, fun fact, you're my first mutual too! It's insane to me HOW DID THIS HAPPEN GUAHPHIAHDKA)
@pointyfruit You! Your art? Muah, wonderful. I don't even care if it's not dca related because it's so good. The shape language, art style, and just unique takes on just anything and everything blows my mind! Let's not forget COLORS. Oml they are so PRETTY. It's like an explosion I never want to end. 💥💥💥 Also! So goofy, so silly, and COTL enjoyer! Let's GOOOOO!!! I don't engage with the fandom much but I DO love the game and honestly I almost beat it, but still have not because I don't wanna do the final boss fight. It can't be over bros... Anyways when I see your posts I always wanna just wave like a neighbor seeing ya blow up 10 boxes of fireworks on a casual Tuesday afternoon. 👋👋👋:D
@divinit3a SPINS YOU!!! 🐶🐕🐶 Heya silly meister! In the midst of reading your work, gotta say? Muwah, Perfecto! The sillies are putting me on a rollercoaster and I'm stuck on the ride! While my ability to yap is a coin flip every hour, you happen to bring the yappening out of me with all the fun notes and posts you do--We've already had so many fun convos! Speaking of posts, the art is peak and will STAY peak! The designs? Muwah. The colors? Muwah. You make even the creepiest of goobers hauntingly beautiful! We've may not have known each other for long, but you're someone I look forward to seeing on my dash/notifications every time I open the app! ❤️❤️❤️
@sinister-sincerely Hi!!!! I'm still sometimes in awe realizing we're mutuals! I really love your work and if I'm in the mood to read something but I don't know what, I tend to turn to Aftersome often, even though I've read both the og and the rewrite! It's like you're the master of writing angst, bitter unrequited feelings, and the strange tenseness but want of confusing relationships. It's gut wrenching and I wish I could write something so evoking! All your stories are amazing and I seriously hope you know that, they're such heavy hitters that they have marked a place in my memory. ❤️ Your art too is wonderful! They don't pop up often but when they do it's a real treat! I love that you use grey scale in a lot of your works and the style is just so pleasing to look at. Whenever I see the DCA in your style I wanna give them the biggest hugs, even if they'd pry me off seconds later! ✨✨✨
@r0b0s-robos / @r0b0-wannabe Waving at you excitedly!!! It's always a pleasure to see your reposts, you always find the good stuff! Plus, you always are trying to help out others and it's amazing to see, your efforts are able to make great impacts. :333 You're also another writer I appreciate immensely, and I'm so invested in your botanist au. The sillies and their botanist who is desperately trying not to fall in love with them!!! ADORE THEM!!! I can't wait to read more! ❤️❤️❤️ The times you post about writing ideas or silly things about the DCA has me nodding my head with a smile. Also, the little notes you leave in tags, despite usually being brief, always makes me so happy! It's like seeing the kind stoic look at you from their seat, let out a small smile, and say "I love this"- and then suddenly it's a blast of blinding white light of endearment straight to my heart. K.O.!
@chickenchirps27 Welcome back!!! I've noticed you've been much more active recently and it's always fun to see what you got goin on! Obligatory art mention, but it would be criminal to NOT mention it. ITS!!! AMAZING!!! THEY LOOK LIKE ROCK CANDY!!! Colors!!! I love it so much, the goobers look delicio- I mean they look adorable and masterfully crafted in each piece of art! And your sona, ugh, she's so gorgeous and alien in the best ways possible. I've never seen anything like her and I am in awe of how you came up with all her little details. Those mantis arms are SICK and I want them!!! (Though drawing may be a little hard if I had em-)✨✨✨
@amarynthian-fortress / @amarynthian-chronicles Hehehe! Boops you! >:D Honestly, thank you for always being the biggest sweetheart around and being so welcoming. You're one of the people that made me feel able to crack my shell more and be more active on here! Your writing is whimsical, your reposts and comments are always so kind and feel-goody, and you just always show you care and the randomest times! Catch me off guard why don't you! I love all the snippets and treats you post, and I'm saving many of your stories to read for rainy days! ❤️❤️❤️
@ping-ski My reaction to us becoming mutuals was- 💥💥💥:OOOOO💥OO💥💥 I think I've followed you right when I started getting active on here and gah, your art is wonderful. So lovely, stylized, and colored so simply yet so appealingly that I can't stop looking. Your aus make me want to read them and their designs are always top tier! Also, I cannot forget to mention you are SILLAY!!! So silly! Your comments on reposts are goofy and I love to read them whenever they come up on my dash! Not to mention your own posts- I will never forget the 3-in-1 solid block of dca encased in ice. I was in awe of seeing them encased and I suddenly wanted my own dca ice cubes to put into a drink and try not to choke on. ✨✨✨
@quilteddreamz Your writing. Oh my GOSH your writing! It's wonderful, beautiful, gah, I can't wait for your advent calender! I wish I could do something for it but I got 3 more weeks of large projects tapped to my back. I am sending much luck your way and know that I am excited to enjoy some daily dca! Don't break yourself over it too! I may adore the goobers but you're most adored first! Take care and keep being such a whimsical person! Muwah! ✨✨✨
@flowysgonemad You are also! Silly!!! You are so fun to see popping around my dash and your doodles just make me go :333 every time! I love your aus and you're a very kind/goofy person! I don't even remember how we became mutuals but garsh diggity dang it, it's awesome to see ya and anything you yap about!
There are MANY more mooties I want to appreciate and show off, but I fear I am currently omw to go to a large thanksgiving dinner and I'm expecting to be there for the rest of the day. SO! If you weren't listed, please know that I AM thinking of you! Have a wonderful time zone, and just know that my heart is so full knowing that you're all there! I can't believe there is that many of you to begin with that I can't fit you all within the time frame! (Would you believe me if I said coming up with all the right words to say here took me 2 1/2 hours?)
So! To all my beloved writers, artists, and sillies alike! From the bottom of my heart, really, thank you! For being here, even reading this, and appreciating the things I do as much as I appreciate you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️✨✨✨✨✨✨
#thanskgiving#mutuals#mutual appreciation#Happy thanksgiving y'all!!!#Y'all are amazing people!!!#Thank you to the community in general for being so kind and welcoming too! ❤️❤️❤️#Y'all should check out the people tagged here if you don't know em! They're all wonderful Fr fr!#dca community#dca fandom#Yapping#Mootie patooties
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Kento makes his own way home
The clan meeting
Yakuza!Nanami x Hostess!reader
MINORS DNI - Tags: Yakuza AU, pretty much stalking.
After leaving Ino to his own devices, despite learning the news of the latest Yakuza group going head on with the Ryomen clan, Kento had more confidence than he knew what to do with.
And that confidence drove him to make his way to your club, just to see a glimpse of you and maybe even to introduce himself.
"Welcome, Sir," The club host bowed and allowed Kento inside. "Do you have any requests for who you might like to accompany you?"
You. He wanted you and that confidence he had almost let him blurt out your name.
Almost.
"I'll sit at the bar for now, I'll decide later,” that confidence went flying out the window faster than smoke, and he couldn’t chase it.
Maybe next time.
There was a benefit to being cooped up watching the computer screens on the network, Kento took at every convenience. There was no fuss or worry and therefore no attention.
Even if it was a Ryomen clan owned club. One of the smaller ones in Shinjuku.
God forbid there was too much commotion and you turn to see him for the first time being doted on. That would have been the worst first impression ever.
Kento left the host and planted himself on the edge of the bar, ordering top shelf whiskey and reading the room.
His stomach flipped when he saw you, in the flesh and smiling with some old man throwing hand signals up to the waiters for more drinks and ice.
It should have been Kento at that table, but he still couldn't face the music to how you'd react in his presence. He knew you far more than you realised.
You however, didn't know he existed and it was far too much of a knock to Kento's existing confidence if you were impassive or indifferent to him.
Just looking at you in person, watching you smile and casually touch the old man's arm every now and then made him envious at best. How would you react to him? Just like that, working your job as you were supposed to in order to collect that tip at the end?
Or would it all be genuine?
He couldn't think, because right now, you stood up and offered your hand to the man with the most warming smile and allowed his lips to touch the back of your hand.
How could you let him touch you like that? Kento was aware it was part of the job and he was certain that the trip would be a big one because of the bottles of champagne he was ordering.
Yet the man was so old and grey, not that Kento was a young spring chicken himself either, the age gap from him wasn't anything to brag about and it was concerning that you would see straight through it.
But he had a chance though, right?
Kento must have zoned out, you were walking right towards him. Straight and no beeline, soft smile in tow and aiming for the bar.
Had you noticed him?
"Hey! Can you put this behind the bar?" you looked straight past Kento and handed over a load of yen bills to the bartender.
"Sure," he said with a warm smile and moved to pour you a drink. "Good night tonight?"
You nodded and Kento listened, keeping his head down to avoid eye contact. "Yeah, though I have just one more client until my break."
"Nice," he slid the glass of what looked like whiskey towards you. "How was old Tanaka tonight? Just as creepy as usual?"
"Shh! Don't be so loud... It's rude," Kento could have sworn you looked over at him in his periphery and if he moved an inch, his flight response may have kicked in. "He's very... ardent."
"That's one way of putting it, take care," the bartender winked and moved on to another customer.
"Thanks."
For a moment, your smile faded. If Kento had blinked he would have missed it. You were far too intelligent for the likes of these old men, just by your vocabulary he had heard at times. Not to mention how beautiful you were.
You weren't happy, that much was clear.
At some point, Kento would find the courage to interact with you. Though for now, he'd continue to watch from afar until he knew more about you and that his chance to be with you was as high as possible.
He'd ensure you would never have to work in a place like this again.
Because you were far too good for a place like this.
#yakuza au#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#x reader#fem reader#reader insert#kento x reader#kento nanami#jjk kento#nanami kento#jjk nanami#jujutsu kaisen nanami
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Hello! I saw your little post about a prompt and was hoping you could write a fic with Mina, Delia, Billie, and reader? Maybe Billie has a bad day and forgets to pick reader up from work so reader has to walk home in the rain. While she is walking home someone starts following her and she gets scared and calls Mina crying. Cordelia and Mina are worried sick when they get to reader. When Billie eventually gets home later she feels awful that she forgot to pick up reader. Mina gets into a fight with Billie about it and Billie breakdowns about the awful day she had and that she is sorry. Just some good old love, fluff, hurt/comfort? Here are some prompts too, if that sparks any inspo! Thank you SO much!
Prompts:
“Honey, I can’t understand you. Take a deep breath and tell me what’s going on.” “Stay right where you are, okay? Don’t hang up the phone. Keep talking to me. We are coming to get you.”
“My god you’re freezing.” ~ “I’m- f-fine. I’m n-not c-cold. P-promise.” ~ “You are certainly not fine and you know I do not tolerate lying. Sit. Down.”
“Oh for gods sake. You have to be kidding me.”
“Can you please stop yelling? You’re scaring her!”
“If it makes you feel any better, you’re very pretty when you cry” ~ “(sobbing) It…it does…thank you”
Sorry that is quite long and no pressure to write of course! Thank you and sending all the most love and hugs!🧡🧡🧡
Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Wilhemina Venable x Reader- Home
A/N: thank you so much for this request!🫶🏼 I‘m struggling a bit with my other wip‘s so this was perfect to spark my inspiration again!
tw/tags: established poly relationship, female reader, mention of smoking, mention of cursing, angst, hurt/comfort
word count: 2k
taglist:
@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahelvar , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay , @blu3dimples, @stepintomyworld
By the time you finally make it out of work, you are greeted with darkness and pouring rain. The wind causes you to shiver and you instinctively pull your coat a little closer as you try and look out for Billie‘s car. Usually the medium would always be on time, waiting for you with that same smirk, some music blasting through her speakers and mostly a cigarette in her mouth. However, as you wait for a little longer you realize she isn‘t anywhere to be seen and so you pull out your phone, checking for any messages but only finding some from your other two girlfriends about dinner plans. You opt to call Billie and clutch the phone to your ear as the rain makes it impossible to hear.
„Sorry babydoll, I‘ll call you back later, I‘m stuck in a meeting“ she mumbles into the phone before hanging up. You sigh a little, realizing she must have forgotten and so you opt to walk, pulling up the hood from your jacket and beginning to walk towards home. It wasn‘t too far and so you begin walking, excited to see Mina and Delia, trying not to get upset about Billie forgetting about you. You knew she was busy, medium to the stars with her own show and getting picked up for multiple new seasons but you couldn’t deny that it stings a little, remembering how she would usually never forget about you, spoil you rotten and put you first, just like you would with her.
At the halfway mark, you are drenched from the rain that keeps pouring on you, your clothes dripping and shivering from the cold. The only lightsource are the cars occasionally driving past you as well as the occasional streetlight and you can‘t help the uncomfortable feeling in your gut. As you turn around you notice a hooded figure behind you and you begin to pick up your pace, walking a different route to usual to shake them off. But the faster and further you walk, the hooded figure seems to come closer and you can‘t help but feel the trembling of your hands and anxiety in your chest. Panting, you reach your phone and begin to call Wilhemina.
„Hi little one- where are you both? we“ she begins but stops herself as soon as she hears the shaking of your breathing.
„Mi-‚Mina, Billie forgot.. pick me up.. walking home.. someone following“ you mumble, too scared to find your voice propery. The redheads‘s features drop upon hearing your disttress, dropping the utensils she was holding to make dinner, Cordelia beside her picking up her girlfriends distress.
“Honey, I can’t understand you. Take a deep breath and tell me what’s going on“ she instructs and you stop walking for a moment as you adjust your breathing.
„Sorry Mina, I‘m walking home and I think someone is following me“ you manage to say and she instantly drops what she is doing, grabbing Delia and their coats.
“Stay right where you are, okay? Don’t hang up the phone. Keep talking to me. We are coming to get you“ she urges and you nod before realizing she can‘t hear you. The redhead stays on the phone, asking for your exact whereabouts. It takes them less than a minute to get to you as you had been much closer to home than you originally thought in your panicking state.
Warm hands reach for you as you almost stumble into Wilhemina. They instantly notice the hooded figure and as soon as Cordelia steps forward, they disappear into the darkness of the night. „You‘re okay little one“ Wilhemina encourages as they take your hands and walk you back home. Somehow the rain disappeared as soon as you saw them both and you wonder whether the supreme may have had something to do with that. They instantly take you inside, ushering you to the kitchen and Delia getting you out of your soaked coat.
„My god you’re freezing“ Wihemina whispers, noticing the disapproval in her eyes. „I’m- f-fine. I’m n-not c-cold. P-promise“ but your shivering state exposes the lie. „You are certainly not fine and you know I do not tolerate lying. Sit. Down“ the redhead instructs and you do as you are told before Cordelia softly runs her hands over your cheeks. „Can you tell me what happened exactly sweetheart?“ she whispers and you look at her through teary eyes before explaining.
„I finished work and I guess Billie was busy so I started walking home“ you explain and they both furrow their eyebrows, never knowing the medium to forget something so important as this. „Why didn‘t you call us darling?“ the supreme tuts and you mumble a quiet „I didn‘t want to bother you two“ before Wilhemina raises an eyebrow. „Sorry“ you whisper and give them a dopey smile, causing for the concern to leave them for a moment as they chuckle to themselves.
„I‘m gonna go and change“ you announce as you notice Billie‘s car parking outside and they nod quietly, Wilhemina‘s anger already flaring up as they watch you go. The medium walks inside, abandoning her bag and stepping out of her heels before a long sigh escapes her, shaking her curls a little to get rid of the remainders of rain, knowing she would have to do an extensive hair care routine tonight in order to have it looking not frizzy tomorrow morning. When she steps into the kitchen with her usual smile moments later, Cordelia stands there with a concerned expression while Wilhemina waits for her with her arms crossed.
„Ugh I had an awful day“ she sighs as she sits on one of the chairs and lights a cigarette. „Oh really?“ Wilhemina sarcastically questions and Cordelia rolls her eyes, already knowing exactly where this is heading. „What?“ Billie hisses but before the medium has a chance to ask any further, the redhead lets out her anger, her protectiveness over you showing. „Have you not forgotten anything maybe?“ she sighs but Billie simply shrugs, too caught up in her own world. „Oh for gods sake you gotta be kidding me Howard“ the redhead hisses before her eyes meet Cordelia‘s who simply stands and observes. „Honey you forgot Y/N“ she says softly, noticing Billie‘s distress and the clear signs she must have had an awful day in order to forget something this important.
The medium‘s eyes snap towards her, the clear signs of shock in her expression as it finally hits her. Guilt immediately consumes her, realizing that was the reason you had called her before. „Oh god“ she murmurs, putting out her cigarette quickly as Wilhemina‘s anger errupts again. „Yes and not only did she have to walk back through the pouring rain, she was also followed by some creep“ Wilhemina curses, causing the medium‘s eyes to widen. „What?!“ Billie asks before Cordelia kneels in front of her. „It‘s okay, we found her and she‘s safe and getting changed upstairs“ the supreme encourages, noticing the guilty tears threatening to spill down the blonde‘s cheek.
Neither of them realized you had been standing by the doorframe for a little while, having changed into some warm clothes and dried yourself up. You froze as soon as you heard the shouting, your anxiety errupting in an instance, caught in between wanting to comfort Billie and telling her it‘s really not a big deal and Mina‘s overprotectiveness. Not even Cordelia realized you are there, her supreme senses currently busy as she tries to navigate between her girlfriend‘s guilt and her other girlfriends anger, all while worried about your state upstairs. By the time she finally realizes you are there, she immediately walks over to you, noticing your shivering state but the other two don‘t realize, more shouting errupting in the silent kitchen.
„I can‘t believe you forgot“ the redhead continues, causing Billie to roll her eyes. „Honestly, why do you always breathe down my neck? I have had a really shitty day and I“ Billie tries to defend herself but before the arguing can continue, Cordelia‘s steady voice and presence echoes through the room. „Can you please stop yelling? you are scaring her“ she demands and they instantly stop, both of their features guilty as they see your frame hiding behind Cordelia. „Oh babydoll“ Billie whispers, as she instantly abandonds her seat and walks over to you. „I‘m so sorry“ she apologizes as her manicured hands cup both of your cheeks before pulling you into her arms. „Are you okay? god you‘re cold.. I‘m so sorry“ she apologizes and you simply hold onto her a little closer, feeling her warmth and your hands almost automatically travelling to her curls and playing with them.
„It‘s really okay Billie, I‘m not mad or sad“ you promise and she looks into your eyes and sees the honesty in them. „It‘s my fault for not calling anyone“ you admit, meeting Wilhemina‘s eyes and hoping she was gonna let this go, Cordelia equally pleading with the redhead. You stay in Billie‘s embrace for a while longer before the supreme offers some dinner to calm down and warm up and you all agree. Before you sit down, you walk to Wilhemina, taking her hand before giving her a gentle smile. „Thank you Mina“ you whisper and she knows exactly what you are thanking her for, always fighting your corner, always having your back no matter what. And for the first time tonight, a gentle smile meets your eyes and she squeezes your hand before guiding you to sit between her and Billie.
Dinner is spent in the comfortable atmosphere of each other, the four of you trying to look past what has happened. But no matter how much you all try, Billie remains silent, on the verge of tears before the dam finally breaks and her tears fall freely down her beautiful cheeks. „Billie, whats wrong?“ you ask as you are the first one to notice, your hand instantly finding hers and squeezing it a little. „I‘m just sorry, I had an awfully busy day and lots of last minute meetings about the new season and I just“ she cries and the three of you stop eating, Cordelia gently wiping the mediums tears and even Wilhemina feeling guilty, knowing she didn‘t exactly help the situation. Her eyes find the medium‘s with an apologetic smile and the medium can‘t help but look at you and apologize again. „It‘s really fine Billie“ you reassure.
„If it makes you feel any better, you are very pretty when you cry“ Wilhemina suddenly says, causing yours and Cordelia‘s eyes to meet at the redheads soft gesture and statement. „It does, thank you“ Billie sobs, a half small smile and frown on her face despite it all. And through Wilhemina‘s gentle words, knowing just how to cheer the medium up at times, the evening comes to a peaceful end, Cordelia helping Billie with her hair routine as she softly combes through her hair and dries it and Wilhemina and you already nestled in bed and waiting for your other two girlfriends to return.
„Thank you Mina“ you mumble as you snuggle closer into her chest. „But you know I‘m a big girl and can take care of myself“ you whisper barely audible and all you can hear is a low chuckle escaping her before she whispers. „No matter what or when, you will always be my little one“ she whispers as she instinctively pulls you closer and presses a kiss to your forehead. Moments later your girlfriends return and you snuggle up in each other‘s embraces, the events from earlier long forgotten as you are home.
#asks#anon#sarah paulson#cordelia goode#wilhemina venable#ahs#american horror story#billie dean howard#sarah paulson x reader#cordelia goode x reader#billie dean howard x reader#wilhemina venable x reader#ahs coven#ahs apocalypse#ahs murder house#lgbtq
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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Cipher's Personal Portable Portal
'How they meet' won the poll!
So just to make things fully contextualized, as far as they're gonna be - here's the full first chunk of this stupidly long fic I'm writing.
I hope you enjoy!
Standing in the wreckage of the burnt-out building, Dipper wishes he didn’t know who did it.
Anyone else would have left some trace sign. A scrape of blood, a hint of burnt hair. A friggin’ decent eyewitness report, even.
But here, like last time, and the time before that, and the time before that - there's absolutely zero traces. No video footage, nobody around at the time of the crime. Not even footprints.
Dipper kicks one of the remaining supports, sending a puff of charcoal up from the impact.��
If he knew the bastard’s name, he’d curse it all to hell.
With a sigh of exhaustion, Dipper sits on a chunk of scorched foundation. He pulls his shoe off to tip the ashes out of it; there’s enough that the resulting cloud leaves him coughing.
Around him, the scoured west wing of the museum is silent, still, and empty. A grey-black skeleton of its former self, filled with dust and charcoal.
This arson is yet another one in a very, very long line of crimes. They’re not just ‘unrelated incidents’, or ‘bizarre coincidences’. Dipper’s not ‘being paranoid’ or ‘coming up with some pretty weird conspiracy theories’.
There’s only one person who could manage this. The same guy who turned a bank upside down - literally - and the same one who impaled a mob boss on an oversized silly straw and gave tails to half of a household last week.
It’s all connected.
Each crime is marked with the same style, mostly by how remarkably weird they are. Along with a thread of magic, distinct in its composition. One so distinctive that it's almost a flavor. Though admittedly, without certain magical analysis, it’s pretty hard to detect.
And if other freelance magicians would take the time and look at Dipper’s notes, maybe one of them would help find this asshole.
Dipper stalks through the burned building, fists balled in his pockets. He stumbles over a fallen support column, and nearly trips before he makes a hopping retreat back.
Though the culprit has been at his game - whatever ‘game’ that is - for a good half a year now, this is the most destructive ‘incident’ so far. Nobody was hurt, since it happened in the middle of the night. The one relief from a terrible crime, that only objects were obliterated in the process -
But the ashes speak for themselves.
Here, there’s nothing left.
He breathes in slowly. Then regrets the attempt at calming himself as he coughs again.
Whatever the culprit’s initial motive was, it hasn’t lasted. He’s grown not only in ambition, but also in his abilities. Things are escalating at a rate Dipper doesn’t like to think about.
Someone has to get to the bottom of this. Before it’s too late. Dipper’s got his number, metaphorically speaking, so. Well, might as well be him.
And when he proves that all of this chaos was created by the same person -
Well. A little boost to his meager reputation couldn’t hurt. Maybe a few medals and accolades. There isn’t a trophy for best monster hunter, but he can imagine standing on a podium and -
Dipper waves that thought off, swearing under his breath. Stupid. He has better things to focus on.
He’s the only freelancer on the case. Definitely the only one taking this seriously, the only one who thinks it’s the same person to begin with - and even he’s starting to have some doubts about ever finding the bastard.
Six months of tracking this guy down, and what does he have to show for it? A ramshackle compilation of incidents, a vague feeling of magic, and a description that could fit any bottle-blond actor with bad fashion sense. Scraps. He might as well pin them up and connect them with red string for all the good it does him.
Another kick sends Dipper hopping back, clutching his foot with a swear. He winces at the hole in the tip, he nearly punctured his foot on a nail.
Just his luck. Wrong place, wrong time, always just barely avoiding disaster. Dipper shows up whenever there’s an event, he’s got the means to follow the guy - but he’s always just a little too late.
Even worse, lately the guy’s been picking places… not at random, exactly. More like he causes trouble wherever it’d be the most annoying to follow.
The culprit must know someone is on his trail. But he’s not making it impossible to keep up, or even majorly difficult for a determined pursuer. Just really, really irritating, like making moves at three in the morning, or pausing just long enough for someone to catch up, then heading right back where he came from. At one point Dipper had to trudge through a literal swamp, only to find that bastard had sauntered in by baking himself a neat little trail right through the damn thing. There wasn’t even footprints to follow.
It’s a repeated point in Dipper’s notes. Whoever this is, they’re a total, absolute dick.
With a sigh, Dipper runs his fingers through the ash on the museum’s floor. Not a single thing is left beyond the shattered glass of some display cases, and the charred remains of the building. Even the enchanted metal tools have been melted into slag.
The day before yesterday, he could tell something was up. Building energy, something that felt like it was made by the culprit. Something with the twinge of a powerful curse, coiled and being wound up like a spring.
Dipper spent that evening convincing - okay, maybe also bribing, thank you Stan for the idea - the museum to let him borrow materials. The day after that, he spent all night, morning, and most of the afternoon running around slapping up anti-curse emblems. The entire south of the city warded, in a fine careful net of spellcraft. The work was exhausting. Both in running around, and in the amount of magic he’d needed to use.
But it was worth it. That evening, in the quiet and very uncursed city, all the emblems activated. Dipper would have sworn he sensed someone in the distance, cursing his own name. That night he went to bed with a smug sense of satisfaction, floating on a cloud of triumph.
Which is probably why the bastard burned down the museum next.
With another sigh, Dipper tucks his notebook back into his knapsack. He’s gleaned all he’s going to for today; in the fading evening light, searching more is pointless.
So much for all the magical artifacts. Most of those had come in really useful in messing with the guy.
…How the hell did the culprit know where they came from, though? He’d need a near encyclopedic knowledge of artifacts to know which ones Dipper used, then track them back to their origin.
Or maybe he just searched on the internet. It’s hard to tell.
Dipper just wishes there were more clues. But just like every other incident, the guy up and freakin’ vanished.
No human can disappear like that without some very irresponsible use of power. That hope is one Dipper’s hanging his hat on. After six months? He has to be reaching his limits. He’ll burn himself out before he can manage too many more incidents. Maybe Dipper will find him by stumbling on his withered, dissolving corpse.
Whoever this is is pretty strong, but no power is infinite. He can’t hide forever.
It can’t be too much longer. Won’t be. Dipper has a plan, he’s gotten really close, and - He’s good at his job, damn it. He knows he is.
Taking a deep, slow breath, Dipper lets it out. Patience is the name of the game here. He’s just gotta keep moving.
One day, he’s going to catch up with that bastard. He’ll see the guy in the flesh. Then he’ll grab that stupid dick before he can escape, again, and wipe that presumably smug look off his probably ugly face.
Turning around one last time, Dipper surveys the destruction, stuffs his hands in his pockets - and pauses.
A speck of light glints in the pile of ash. The last bit of evening sun, shining off a metallic surface.
Alert with surprise, Dipper scrambles over to the pile. Kneeling down, he brushes the dust carefully aside, careful not to disturb anything fragile that might shatter if handled wrong.
One thing did survive. Thank fuck, it’s not an absolute total loss. Just, uh… Ninety-nine percent of it.
He scuffles through the still-warm ashes, cupping his palms underneath the lump and lifting it from its bed. The motion sends white puff rising up as ash slips away from the artifact.
A small black, squarish thing rests on the pile, a bit larger than both his palms put together. The material is faintly warm from residual heat, insulated by the ash it laid in - and there’s not a mark on it. Not even a scratch.
Dipper turns the artifact over in his hands with a frown. The shining black surface reveals no obvious buttons or secrets. Just a kind of phone-ish shape, though more square and squat. If he didn’t know any better, he’d say a guest dropped it on the rush to escape.
The fact that it’s still intact though. Nearly glowing with magic, a tremulous feeling under his palms - this is not dropped by some clumsy tourist. Not even Ford could put this together.
Wiping at the object with his sleeve, Dipper manages to clean off most of the smooth surface. On one of the sides, dust clings to the thinnest of engravings. The very faint outline of an equilateral triangle. No runes or other magical scribing, just… a shape.
Dipper thinks back but - no, he doesn’t remember seeing this in the collection. A quick check online reveals…
Basically nothing. There are - were - a bunch of stone and metal slabs in the archives, all described so poorly as to be useless. Some are even bunched up in groups. ‘Magical slab 1-24’ and ‘Metal artifact 1-78’, no description involved.
Not surprising. Probably dug up in some mass excavation site, transported here, then never really looked at again. The bulk nature of the shipment means it was overlooked, its magical properties never discovered.
After today, he’s just glad that even one item escaped this onslaught.
The other artifacts must not have had much to them. But some magical property in this artifact’s making must have saved it from the blaze. Fireproofing, perhaps? Against weird fire? That’s unusual. Maybe even unique.
As the only survivor, it really needs investigating.
Dipper glances over his shoulder, then around. With everyone evacuated, it’s quiet in the rubble. Nobody here would notice if, say… a clue wandered off.
The artifact slips easily into his pocket. The shape conveniently looks just like a phone, even if the shape’s a bit off. Not something that would attract any attention.
Whistling nonchalantly, ducking out of the way of local law enforcement and any onlookers - Dipper makes his escape.
Another day of pursuit. Another scene of disaster, the culprit there and gone in the blink of an eye.
He’ll be up to something new, next. Never the same thing twice, never in the same place.
Dipper will follow in his evil tracks, of course. But for tonight - his fate is another crappy hotel room.
He ditches his backpack by the door, slumping against the wall and its chipped paint. He could start going through his notes, and the pictures of the arson. Put in more work, find further connections -
But it’s been a long day, and he’s tired. He might be magical, but he’s only got so much to work with. A reasonable night’s sleep, if he can manage, will make the task loom less horribly over his tired brain.
With a sigh, he drops back on the mattress. There’s some bounce to it, springs squeaking like they’re full of mice. Hell, maybe they are. The type of room he can afford isn’t exactly decadent.
That, though, should be temporary. Dipper’s career is only just starting; freelancers in the ‘solving magical problems’ scene don’t get great rates. Especially as a beginner. Definitely without a partner; it makes him look super young. Like he’s just starting out, fresh-faced and not having any inroads.
Because this field is really stupid, and doesn’t pay attention to results. Dipper’s been fine on his own for years, and he’s done really cool things without that ‘networking’ crap.
All by himself. Totally cool with that, because Dipper’s a cool guy, sometimes. If Mabel hypes him up enough on one of their phone calls, he almost believes it too.
Though it would be nice to have some backup, it’s hard to find someone who really gets the job. Or does it in the way that Dipper goes about it. The number of people who are willing to take long treks in hyper-magical territory to search for an obscure clue, or set up really complicated traps for dangerous monsters, or talk over high-level magical theory while sitting in the rain all night just to get one body-snatcher are…
Well, besides Ford, who recently retired, there aren’t any. Only Dipper himself.
One day, things are going to change for him. All his effort will pay off. If he keeps solving mysteries, and fighting monsters, he’ll forge a reputation as someone who always gets the job done. No matter how hard it is, he can handle it. The work is picking up, too. The last six months have shown the biggest series of magical incidents in decades.
And he’s gonna be the one to get to the bottom of it.
Dipper Pines, the guy who proved it’s all connected. He’ll have it laid out in facts and math, all the evidence. They’re all gonna see that he was totally right.
Once he finally gets this guy, everything’s going to start looking up.
The sheets rustle as Dipper settles back, holding the artifact up over himself. He stares into the black surface, and a slightly distorted reflection narrows its eyes back at him.
A good mystery always intrigues him. This one should take his mind off the other, irritating one for a while.
The only remaining object from the fire is clean and smooth. A mysterious creation, of unknown purpose. Clearly riddled with magic, too; Dipper feels it running just under the surface like a rapid current. It gives the artifact a weight that has nothing to do with mass.
Power.
Did the criminal see this artifact, still intact after all the other magical objects were gone? Did he try to destroy it too, and fail? Or simply not notice he’d missed one out of thousands?
Whatever it is, it’s got a lot more going on than meets the eye.
Dipper casts a quick identifier, which comes back with nothing. He’s not surprised. That’s the first thing anyone would try. If it was that simple, he’d already have the full description off the site.
With a shrug, he traces another set of runes, his own version, adding a little more oomph behind it -
And the magic leaps back instantly, with the bizarre sensation of a bouncy ball hitting concrete.
“Huh,” Dipper says, thoughtfully. He sits up, hunching over the slab in his hands. “Now that’s new.”
A more subtle approach, then. Tracing the lines of energy with the barest brush of magic upon magic reveals something deeply complex. Thin layers twist together deep under the surface, building an entire circulatory system. Dipper has to put it down for a moment, suddenly worried that it is organic.
When a cautious prod doesn’t get a response, he relaxes. Not fleshy, just complicated. Which also proves he was right earlier - the artifact’s just as powerful as he’d thought. The spellcraft is unlike anything he’s ever seen.
Dipper rubs his hands together, starting to smile.
Even if he doesn’t find the guy he’s after, figuring this out could be a heck of a win.
Several attempts later, he’s beginning to get why this bastard brick got tossed in with all the other junk.
Nothing here is working. It simply deflects. Standard spells poing off of it like rubber, while giving his magical senses an odd, back-of-the brain afterimage of a circle with a slash through it; a firm ‘nah’.
Dipper nearly chucks the thing across the room in frustration, before shutting his eyes and taking several, calming breaths.
Okay, weird thing, weird enchantment. The ordinary stuff won’t work. The magical logic is… twisted in a way that leaves it incompatible with most everything. He’ll have to find a different approach.
“What are you?” Dipper says, low and frustrated. He gives the artifact a shake, as if he can knock the secrets out like a rock from a shoe. “What secrets are you hiding in there?”
No response, not that he expected one. With a wry smile, he taps the sleek surface with a finger, twice. “C’mon, man. Talk to me.”
Huge yellow letters flash onto the black surface.
HEY
Dipper throws the artifact, a bit awkwardly since he’s lying on his back. It sails in the air in a high thin arc, landing with a thump between his legs. He scoots rapidly backward, sheets pulling up behind him.
The artifact lies where it landed, an unmoving brick. There’s magic in the air now, but no sense of any spell building, ready to unleash power to blow his face off. The latent spellcraft of the artifact has just been activated.
More text displays on the surface, bare except for the glowing letters.
To the jerk that’s swiped my private stuff: You got some nerve! I expect this back by interdimensional mail in a week, or trust me - there will be consequences.
Dipper waits a full minute before he lets go of the headboard. Tentatively, he kneels near the…
Is this a phone?
Clearly it’s a communication device of some sort, with the freaking text messages. A phone is the obvious equivalent, only - he thought it looked far older than that, something way before mobile phones. Possible ancient. Is that a coincidence, maybe, or is it secretly modern?
Dipper taps the ‘screen’, just below the glowing words. To his surprise, there’s actually a keyboard, what the hell. This thing keeps getting weirder.
Since it hasn’t already thrown a horrible curse at him, or burst into flames - it’s reasonably safe to assume that it’s simply ‘on’. Not ‘explosive’.
With hands that are definitely not shaking, he picks it up, and types,
Who is this?
His own text pops up in blue. A strange contrast to the yellow, but he’s guessing it’s for convenience - there’s no bubbles to tell who’s said what otherwise.
A few seconds of nervous waiting later, there’s a response.
Oh hey, you answered! Well, human - You’re talking to the one and only Bill Cipher, Dream Demon, all-powerful master of the Mindscape! I’d say it’s nice to meet ya but you’re not supposed to have a direct line to me!
Dipper raises an eyebrow.
Now that’s one hell of an introduction. It might even have been interesting, if it didn’t smell of complete bullshit.
Complicated spellwork, sure. Incomprehensible architecture? Maybe. Dipper can admit it; he’s never seen anything with a web of spells on it this complex, in such small of a package.
But the idea that Dipper just stumbled onto a demonic artifact of all things. One that wasn’t instantly detected, recorded, then ritually destroyed is…
Someone’s fucking with him.
Dipper rolls his eyes as he types back,
Really? Demon? You can’t expect me to believe that.
What, you calling me a liar? ‘Cause I am, but not about this! I got better things to mislead mortals about. This is my property, not something for your grubby mortal mitts.
Dipper snorts. Guess this person’s sticking with the bit. Obviously whoever created this would want it back - but too bad. Whether they’re delusional, stupid, or just a flat-out liar, they’re really good at enchanting. It’d be a waste not to study their work.
He lies back on the bed as he replies.
Sure, have fun roleplaying, or whatever, it doesn’t make a difference. Finders keepers, losers weepers.
ARE YOU CALLING ME A LOSER. MORTAL.
Hmm, I’m detecting a certain amount of ‘crying about it’, so. Yeah. Suck it, loser.
Smirking, Dipper settles back - then his half-smile drops, as he holds the ‘phone’ a little further away from himself.
Though the blue fire building up in the screen looks like a bad sticker effect, the artifact’s also getting a alarmingly warm. It vibrates in his hands - then suddenly stops, cooling down.
Ha! Alright, alright, I admit - you got some balls.
Maybe you’ll change your tune once you REALLY know what you’re dealing with! Might wanna check the connection, if you’re even capable of it! Mortal magic doesn’t reach across dimensions!
With a grimace, Dipper taps his fingers on the phone. It’s slightly cooler now, but still worryingly reactive to… whatever happened on the other end.
Damn. Whoever this is, they’re not only really really good at enchanting, they’re also pretty confident that tracking them down won’t spoil their game. The confidence exuding from this ‘Bill’s’ words feels genuine.
Honestly, though, the suggestion is a good one. Dipper should have tried to trace the call the second he knew someone else was on the line.
Maybe ‘Bill’ thinks he won’t manage to find him. Joke’s on him, though; Dipper’s amazing at finding stuff. He’s the best tracker of magical anything in years. Maybe decades. With a solid, stable connection right in front of him? Hell, he could do this one in his sleep.
Time to call the bluff.
He casts the tracing spell, though it takes longer than usual. A few gestures and muttered ritual aren’t gonna cut it; he has to improvise around the strange construction of the enchantment. Even trailing along the magic seems harder than usual, like it resists mixing with his own, and it takes him a few attempts to match the signal.
Once he finds the right way to tune it… the lead snaps along the already-existing connection, and zips away to find its source.
The line extends out from the shabby hotel room, a plucked string in Dipper’s senses. It twists around the phone, rising slowly. Invisibly passing through the walls and the -
Ceiling? Dipper looks up on instinct, even though nothing is visible.
From there it swirls around in the air like a silly straw on steroids, and then - out, very far, in a way that isn’t up or down or left or right, just
Away.
Dipper has to cut off the tracing spell before vertigo has him reeling. The swirling sense of standing on top of a skyscraper is followed by a flip in his stomach. That he’s using a device he barely understands that reaches out into something even more incomprehensible.
He drops the phone-artifact, trying to clear his head by shaking it rapidly.
That’s not nearby. Not on this planet. Possibly, genuinely, not even in this dimension.
Shit. Bill wasn’t bluffing.
Dipper wipes sweating palms on the sheets. To pick up the phone again takes an effort, willing himself to grasp it in unsteady hands.
A demon.
All the monsters he’s fought, curses he’s broken, years of work tucked into his belt, and he’s never seen one of those.
Demons are dangerous, evil, and very, very powerful. Consorting with them is by all accounts a terrible idea. He should never have picked this up. He should hang up, and throw the damn artifact out the window, hoping that nobody else makes as dumb a mistake as he just did.
On the screen, there’s a long long scroll of yellow letters, filling the entire surface. ‘HA HA HA HA’ over and over and over again.
Before he can think better of it, Dipper starts a response. He’s halfway through a sentence - what the fuck, that’s not funny- before he pauses.
Terrible evil monster. Stupid powerful. Probably Bill sensed the tracing of the connection, like he did with Dipper’s other testing. Bill wanted the result startle him. Because he thinks it’s funny.
Dipper grits his teeth, and glares at the screen.
Actually, screw this guy. Dipper’s keeping the stupid phone. If for no other reason than spite. This ‘Bill’ guy seems pretty full of himself, like he’s totally above some human. He’s in for a bad time, then, because Dipper’s not going to let one little surprise scare him off.
Besides. The average guy would get into horrible, even deadly trouble, whereas Dipper… sort of knows what he’s doing. No, he is good at his job. Finding secrets, solving mysteries, thwarting evil jerks who think they’re oh-so-hilarious, the whole shebang. He does it all.
Taking another breath, hissing through clenched teeth - Dipper lets it out. Losing his temper isn’t going to help deal with an extradimensional being. He has to be careful.
He thinks for a long moment before he responds.
Okay. Let’s say I believe you. Maybe. Then you should know I didn’t steal your… whatever this is. I found it lying around, and I just. Got kind of curious.
HA HA HA! Of course you were! Careful with that impulse, kid, it kills more than just cats!
A jerk who definitely thinks he’s hilarious. Dipper rolls his eyes, then, rather pettily, decides to ignore that statement.
More pressing questions take the lead. Like what the fuck he’s holding right now, and if there are any other nasty tricks in store. A little bit of him, bubbling under the surface, wonders what being a demon is like. What they get up to, common habits. Ways they could be tracked down and, y’know, defeated, maybe.
Theoretically, he’s got a line to a bunch of innocent, totally not-thwarting-related information that could be super useful to someone trying to, maybe, be a super cool monster-fighter.
Dipper backspaces a bunch over some poorly thought out questions. First things first. Like what the hell he’s holding right now.
So. What is this?
Good question! The gadget you’re poking at with your sweaty meat-paws is paired to the one I have here at my place. A little one-on-one communication assistant, if you will. Once you started groping around with your magic, it wasn’t hard to tell someone had picked it up!
Dipper raises an eyebrow. Though he already has an idea… a little confirmation never hurts.
Like, you got a notification? Or literally felt?
The latter! Kinda like smell, but by touching things with your eyeballs. And with all your prodding around you might as well have been stinking up the place! Your spells aren’t real subtle!
Hey, they’re subtle! Having weird extra senses is just cheating.
Sucks to be human, then! In that you suck at everything! What’s a LOSER like you gonna do about it?
Dipper nearly throws the stupid artifact again - but he holds back, gripping it tight. Instead he sits up, leaning down and hauling his backpack up from the side of the bed.
Maybe Bill thinks he can’t do anything. That he’s some ignorant nobody, who doesn’t have any real skills or talent or doesn’t have any friends - but he’s got that wrong. Dipper’s not a loser. Bill’s not getting away with that bullshit.
One quick unzip and a bit of rifling around later, he finds what he was looking for. Carefully, Dipper bounces the heft of a flashlight battery in his hand. Shutting his eyes, he focuses on crafting a quick working.
Magic is all about energy, and its direction. Focusing power, conveying it from one place to another. Pushing anything across dimensions would take impossible amounts of energy, stuff Dipper doesn’t have. If it weren’t for a very convenient connection, already in his hand.
Dipper has nothing on hand to actually exorcise the guy - he’s not sure that’s even possible when Bill’s where he should be - but retribution is in order.
More text lines appear on the artifact. He ignores them. Changing this up to work with the demon device is a challenge, but after figuring out how to alter the tracking spell changing this one up isn’t hard. He adjusts the flow of magic this way, into the tangle of not-veins in the device that way, finishes the chant-
Then touches his tongue to the battery.
The jolt passes through him painlessly, following the spell. It zips along his nerves, down into his hand and from there - into the artifact itself.
Where it should, theoretically end up right at that bastard.
Dipper tosses the battery back into his backpack. Picking up the ‘phone’, hunching over to stare at the screen.
That worked. He felt the energy move… unless he got the math wrong. Or a detail of his spell. Or maybe demons are immune to electricity, and he just did something totally pointless.
God. It might even prove Bill right, and wouldn’t that be the worst -
The next line of text comes in.
What the hell? A joy buzzer? That’s some real petty prank stuff! You seriously pulled that bullshit? And across dimensions?
A tense pause. Dipper taps the phone, checking for it heating up again - but another line pops up after a few seconds.
Y’know what, kid? I think I might actually like you! You’re FEISTY.
Dipper nearly does a double-take.
But no, that - what? Aren’t demons supposed to be vengeful? He was half-sure he’d have to chuck the phone out the window before it exploded in his hands.
In fact, you’re in luck! ‘Cause I’m pretty bored, and I can totally show you how to improve that jinx of yours! If you can keep up with a little theory, that is.
Because that’s not suspicious or anything. Conversation with a demon can only lead to ruin and disaster. He should absolutely, definitely stop this right in its tracks.
Still, Dipper shrugs, and types,
Try me.
#billdip#I should probably make a tag for this 'series'#Let's say the tag will be#Portal AU#I say series but my plan is to complete it then post it in One Big Post on AO3 eventually#I just wanted you all to know I really am working on stuff and I hope you enjoy these two idiots#This is ~5k of the now 21k document I have going#Truly I am caught in a trap of my own making#Suffering is writing and writing is suffering#I also realized while putting this on Tumblr that I can totally change text colors!#I might apply that formatting trick later if I can find a shade of yellow that isn't totally obnoxious to actually read#Little nervous about this since it's not Familiar AU but they needed not to know each other for the Premise to work#I'm excited to get to later stuff because I can make SO many dumb jokes
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Environment practice
Kinda just how i think Killer’s room would look like (a lil bit hdfhfjfj) but also just me messing around
#you can tell environments are not my strong suit sbbxbxhhxhx#does this deserve fandom tagging????#eh just gonna put one so i can find it later if I wanted#anothers art#killer sans
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i'm pretty sure alastor being aroace was backpedaled by amir 😭 he said it in an interview, but recently on twitter, he mentioned that he misspoke and alastor was canonically ace, but the fandom widely views him as aroace!! of course, the aro implications are very VERY evident, but i don't think it's like. Canon.
The conversation about Alastor being aro/ace during the second live Q&A on YouTube a little while ago is the most recent one I've seen from the cast on the topic, and it was very... how do I put this. Viv did not explicitly utter the words "Alastor is aromantic," but I think that if the subject were literally anything else that people didn't have a tendency to debate into the ground, it would be unquestionable, haha. There is only so much nodding at, "mhm"ing, engaging with, agreeing that it was important to confirm, and explicitly not correcting of people calling Alastor aro/ace that she can do before it's, like, obvious that she meant him to be. As for Amir himself: He outright stated in the same Q&A that he is working on understanding what aro/ace means, so let's please give him the space to learn!
Even if that hadn't happened, though, I think it's a little silly to say he's not aromantic just because it may not have been explicitly stated by the show's creator in the straightforward terms explicitly accepted by a specific subsection of the show's online community, especially when I think the average TV show writer often isn't going to understand the distinction well enough to consistently specify the terminology or even make a distinction at all.
Like, when Rosie made the joke about Alastor being an ace in the hole, did we think she was reassuring Alastor that she knows he and Charlie aren't outright fucking? Or does it make more sense that her comment was meant more generally about the idea of him being in a relationship at all? Would it have made sense for her to make a joke about Charlie being too young for Alastor if she thought he was open to romantic relationships, or do we think she would consider Charlie too young for a romantic relationship with him even if the characters weren't having sex? What is the actual implication of how this scene plays out if we step back from our modern and informed understanding of aro/ace terminology and into the shoes of the average Joe or Sally watching this show who doesn't even know who Viv is?
I think that if we engage with this scene with a genuine attempt at media literacy then it's pretty safe to say that it's on-screen canon!
#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#aro#aroace#aroace alastor#meta#putting this in all my tags so i can find and refer to it later if needed haha#personal#ask#anonymous#long post
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medic tf2 doodles?!?!?? in this economy!???!?!? (art from yesterday)
most gentle and sweet middle aged german man in the whole entire world smile vs planning to swap all of your organs with a series of interconnected frogs smile
a doodle i did of Medic and Archimedes.... he looks too round in this drawing, not smug and evil enough..... also Mitzi from the RAE appearance :D
i LOVE the voicelines Medic has with Haunted Archimedes, he's not disturbed or even slightly put off by the fact that his zombified dove is 1. talking and 2. has a violent and constant craving for brains. he's just like. being a slightly irritated pet owner about it. he's just like "ugh yes archimedes vants all zhe brains doesn't he. now shut up". also i think this is the most on-model medic drawing i've ever done wtf
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 medic#medic tf2#archimedes tf2#mitzi mozzarella#doodles#sketches#sketch#also um. please no thirst comments in the tags. /srs#i feel incredibly uncomfortable with comments like that and i don't want those things being said about my art#and i feel like it might happen here so like. please don't do that thanks 👍#man i love drawing medic. he's actually so fun to draw and i love giving him the most insane expressions ever#he has so many sharp angles it's so fun!!!#i also really like the second opinion voice lines. he's not even frightened. he just has an annoying roommate sewn to his face#aahh this is why i love medic#i have a cold right now so i can't think of any other tags to put on this post........#might post some more barry stuff later. i drew a pretty cursed one yesterday heehoo#i want to post some of my really old tf2 art from like 2018#and maybe some SUPER old tf2 stuff from a decade ago if i can find the notebook i drew it in#back when i used to draw everything with a pen and no guidelines 💀#i'm pretty sure i still have it! it's not something i would throw away at all#it's probably hidden deep in my closet with my other old art stuff#i'd like to share my super old unhinged comics with a bunch of characters from various properties some day#i remember making a comic where all my favourite tf2 and mlp characters teamed up to stop peg from peg + cat from taking over the world#because i really didn't like the show as a kid. i thought peg's voice was annoying and it was a show about math. and i hate math#it's not even a bad show... it's really cute actually..... why did i hate it so much#i was peg + cat's biggest hater. if p+c had a million haters i was one of them. if it had 1 hater that was me. if it had 0 then i grew up#anyway. ignore all those tags i went on a ramble loolll#i forgot this post is about my medic drawings... yeah i really like these drawings and i love drawing medic <3
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Quick stream today to get some basic ideas on paper regarding a Hawth redesign; feel free to hangout!!
[Click Here to Watch on Twitch]
#fizzles streams#Hawthorne#blogsona#fizzles draws#concept art#character design#im putting this in my regular tags so i can find it later :)
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↳ john steinbeck, east of eden
#twedit#teenwolfplus#lydiamartinedit#lydia martin#teenwolfedit#ok hiiiiii for my tags#tw#anyway#i love her!#her trajectory is so fun and i love the way she finds goodness through accepting kindness#because she needs it! s1 and s2 were so hard for her! she's on her feet because allison kept her there. and then so do scott and stiles#and so maybe she can help too! maybe she can do something kind too. and scott is so kind when she offers#and then that resolution is met with even more kindness; its not in this set but allison is the first person to say she believes her#and not because ALLISON needs to believe her; this isnt about finding bodies. its about trusting and comforting her friend#its because LYDIA needs allison to believe her. and she does! and then later she receives similar comfort from stiles#and then meredith reassures her of her personhood in a way thats even beyond Not Being a Monster; lydia doesnt do monstrous things#meredith sees her and sees goodness where it always has been but wasnt always offered so freely#AND THEN LYDIA STARTS OFFERING IT FREELY!! she looks out for tracy for no reason but to do it#and when she goes catatonic she surfaces because MEREDITH ENCOURAGES HER!! and because MALIA NEEDS HELP!!!#when she realizes she can protect her friends by putting their bodies before hers it what she does. she wakes up for malia. she stares down#a gun and guides liam away from the ghost rider holding it. not pictured here but in 6b she protects mason with her body too#and the ghost riders gun couldnt hurt her but the hunters sure could!!! AND BEFORE THE SHOOTING. SHE LOOKS MONROE IN THE FACE#a woman who wants to kill her and has already proven she can! but she does it because scott believes in people and lydia believes in scott#and scott needs help and lydia can help him! and how many times has he helped her. how many times have all of her friends helped her#and by this point. how many times has she offered the same? she's used to it enough that she can offer monroe kindness too. a chance to tal#LYDIA MARTIN I LOVE YOU FOREVER YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS#NO ONE IS DOING IT LIKE YOU!!
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i feel like this literally says it all about the parallels between Mikage/Mamiya/Tokiko and Utena/Anthy/Akio
#the musical was insane for putting anthys silhouette there#gathering quotes/evidence etc for this mikage essay im brainstorming#no but for real i feel like the musical makes everything about mikage so so clear#the like. physicality of it and staging makes the subtext you have to read between the lines for much more obvious#i feel like i finally understand everything............#ive literally watched the whole thing before but rn my brain feels so open#im dead tired so im just trying to jot down everything that came to mind before i pass out lol#thank you empty movement for hosting another stream!!!!#rgu#mine#rgu meta#<- not that this is actually really meta of any kind im just tagging that so i can find it on my blog easier later#'My sister came to this academy just to meet you' okay pack it up Tokiakio#.txt
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Linktober Day 9
Deity
*sneezes after downing coffee* Well irl stuff got in the way so I'm way behind my original schedule for these and for Linktober but here we go with another arguably short one, fuelled purely by self indulgence, headcanons, spite against my linguist essays that kept me from keeping to schedule, severe sleep deprivation, a shout out to the Ender Lilies soundtrack and Majora's Mask soundtrack, and Nintendo for not clarifying anything about the lore so I'm snatching what I can and making it my own lol. Look, when you fíxate so much on details the Zelda team doesn't elaborate on you have to fill in the gaps with what you can.
As always can be read as romantic or platonic, technically in a LU context but not explicitly in it by itself.
The Lord of the Mountain liked hearing people sing.
In a way, it wasn’t a surprise, Hylia and the Golden Three each had their ballads and symphonies and minuets, each splendid and with cuts of their divinity in it, Farore was fond of lightning and forest alive minuets, and you could swear Farosh sparked just a bit brighter when one would him the beginnings of the Minuet of the Forest near their spring, Din was fond of boleros, fiery and alive and howling with the echo of flame touching earth that made a shine run through Dinraal’s scales, Nayru, in contrast, was much fonder of blizzard and river quiet serenades, the songs of contemplation at first snow ringing clear when Naydra curled around it’s spring, content to be free of Malice.
And of course Hylia had her ballads and lullabies, perfectly fitting to her display of divinity, of honey days and vast bird like wings, of ambered summers to come and to pass and dazzling solar storms of starlight and sunlight sparking through the human form of her descendants and heroes. So in a way, you weren’t surprised at all that the Lord of the Mountain – Satori, with a familiar touch of londsleite divinity, the hunt of the woodland beasts and diamondscar adoration for the Hero of the Wilds, similar in glory to the Light Spirits petrichor and vermeil fondness for the Hero of the Twilight – liked to listen to people sing. What you were surprised was how it attempted to follow along, it’s head across your lap the second you sat down in the clearing, a gentle hum on back of it’s throat, an owl’s cry and a cicada’s humming and faintly, chirring purring as presses it’s faces into your hands, a gentle request for petting.
It was adorable, even with the faint notes of the chill of clear spring water on winter and the livewire feeling of magic, like holding your hand too close to a flame but not quite touching it.
A low chuckle brushes against the back of your mind, a feeling like biting on ice, the prowl of a wild beast and the build up of lightning and light used to create his blade, the amused affection of a warrior reconvening with their brother in arms, you think you see the bone ivory of the Deity’s hair on the side of your vision, though you know he’s not physically there, ‘He likes you.’
You hum, gently patting behind it’s ears, pushing through the chill, gracefully not mentioning the burning with a smile at the mythic being’s faint chirring, birdsong and the wind through cherry blossoms that sparkle like rose quartz, “Well I quite like him too, I can see where it’s gentleness comes from.”
The ghost of a touch over your hair, the caress of lightning striking over your skin and the hair on the back of your neck pricking up and the crisp cold of winter, the chill of the ending and the flame of a new dawn, of new days, the phantom of magnolias and spring water on your tongue. The fragrance of pine, daffodils and blood soaked lilies on ashen fields on your senses, gentle and careful, marking but not claiming, ‘Only because it’s you, beloved. It’s not something easily given.’
You sigh, shakily composing yourself, you let yourself relax into the phantom sensation. Of hopes and dreams and healed suffering, of the divinity of hunt turned into protection and lightning given form, of tangled timelines and crystalized memories, “I know. It does not change my opinion, either way.”
To be the subject of a god’s care and regard was dangerous, after all. For the human and the deity in question, you know the stories from your world well, of the effects of Hylia on First and Sky, of Twilight and the personification of the Twilight Realm and the spirits of his land, of Wild and clawing from death’s embrace into that of the wilderness.
Knew how the fact the Fierce Deity’s mere proximity causing pain on those who changed him into hunting for hunt’s sake into protection for the sake of someone else cut deeper than even the ever encroaching entropy all beings must one day face. It was no wonder the Song of Healing was his creation, to want to ease the burden.
You gladly grant him some peace, in turn, even if it wasn’t much. It’s the least you can do, for always having his ways of watching over your heroes.
“Join me? We can make a duet.”
You feel more than see him shift, ephemeral, fleeting, gentle against the edges of your existence, as foreign to Hyrule as your own, sparking over your spine as you feel ozone and rust on your teeth. Satori is humming again to match the rumble of thunder in the man’s voice, the heralding of songs of war and elegies for the dead, ‘Of course, though I’m afraid I do not know many songs, besides…’
“It’s alright,”, you smile faintly, there’s a white ocarina in his hands, as he leans, a spectre against your side, “I’ll teach you some of my own, though you’ll have to forgive me if I don’t remember all the lyrics.”
‘It would be my honor to learn.’
You think he smiles, from the fluttering of something ancient and long forgotten against your side.
You sing to Satori and the Chain, a small respite of familiar and forgotten tunes, the Lord of the Mountain hums along. The Fierce Deity’s song cutting through any nightmares that may ail your heroes for another night.
When the dawn of a new day comes, the feeling of divinity against your skin feels just a bit more obvious, sinking into every crack of your being like a shroud, falling over your boys like a veil, reflecting the breath of eternity over Hyrule.
(First gives you a look that’s half exasperation, half understanding. Sky pointedly sticks to your side as Time looks you over, markings deep with vibrant color. You shrug with a helpless smile as you feel the lightest brushes of Hylia’s fond days of gold and starlit summers days against the Lord of the Mountains warm, luminous affection and the Fierce Deity’s smug, but content lonsdaleite smile.)
#linked universe x reader#fierce deity x reader#is this after Majora?#Is Fierce Deity really there or just manifesting due to being fond of Reader and living in their head rent free?#Is Hylia jealous because she couldn't stake a claim first?#Did he create Satori in this?#That's for future Summer to know and y'all to find out lol. Though this does reference the theory he's the one who sealed Majora#The divinity of Hyrule changes people the closer they are to it#Fierce Deity is both a warrior/demon god and the hopes and dreams of the people of Termina and that duality is fascinating in this essay-#Really I believe that Fierce Deity doesn't mean to harm his users or people who aren't enemies#But the Eldritch Vibes ™ are so much even when he's toning it down it's a slippery slope#Good thing Reader is a divinity magnet just from proximity to the Chain and can put it aside#Plus Time putting on the mask as either Sprite/Mask change the FD as much as he changed him and same for First and Hylia#summer writes linktober 2023#summer writes#maybe I'll add more tags or elaborate later idk I need a nap and to work on the other prompts
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𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗶𝘁𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗵. That said, when speaking of his paramour with the mention of Mystra, it is not a slight. After all, Mystra, the goddess, wasn't just his lover; she, as she'll remain, controls the Weave.
As a scholar of magic for all his life, Gale is thoroughly enamored with it. He's always had the Weave, casting spells and enchantments for as far as his long memory goes, and there's no power on earth that can pale that devotion. When Gale says Mystra's name, in love, it is never with yearning. When he tells his lover that he forgets his goddess when he stands beside them, he means quite literally that he foregoes his faith. He doesn't mention her like a quality benchmark with which they've somehow surpassed, but to punctuate how wholly he has fallen for them. With a new, honest love, he is turned entirely from Mystra. In fact, so utterly bewitched, he's like a born again man. He isn't besotted by his goddess, held stalwart in her sway and seemingly, abundantly, and frustratingly stubborn. After that disastrous relationship, I promise you, Gale spares not a single thought toward her. She might have control of the Weave, and as such, stands still his only patron deity, but his new, doting lover? They become something of a new religion for him; he is most devoted, taken by, and so loyal to them.
He does not see Mystra. Do not assume he still feels for her.
He's a man of one love, and they will have all of him.
#HEADCANON.#Never go into the Gale tag because the fandom has such bad faith interpretations of Gale 24/7#I say as another bad take makes me type this up.#Gale isn't still hung up on her GOD. Stop.#Stop saying 'Gale keeps mentioning Mystra when we're being romantic and it's so annoying.'#Dude. Mystra is his LITERAL god. He is saying YOU ARE HIS NEW FAITH.#Oh my god. Stop misinterpreting it. He isn't still ENAMORED with Mystra.#UGHHHHHHHH.#He got out of an abusive relationship and is finding out THIS is what love is#that this love IS something he can put his faith and heart in.#And you reduce him to... guy that can't get over ex tee hee?#Tell me why I shouldn't make your milk curdle.#Someone: the astral sex scene is just him reliving his moment with Mystra.#Or get this... he himself has basically largely only had sex and intimacy through that realm#and knows it to be pleasurable. He wants his partner to know pleasure beyond all imagination. THAT'S IT.#People make me [semi truck comically long honk].#This man makes it a POINT that his heart is made ONLY for one and you all just?!?!? Talk like this!?! You wound Dean. [third person talk]#Anyway (breathes). I'm normal now. I will be on later cuz big things cane up at work. peace.
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do you write fic on ao3?
unfortunately for everyone involved i do!
#ask#and if youre wondering about my handle i write on anon so its doesnt particularly matter (shrugs)#and also i think its pretty easy to figure out which fics ive written because i want to makeout mad sloppy style with an em dash#anyways (waves offhandely) it doesnt really matter much because i have like posted an ss on here before so you know#its not like im trying to hide it like eh#but also because of my disposition that would put a tranced rabbit to shame i dont exactly yell it from the hilltops either#the moral of the story is if you ask me what im working on ill yap about it maybe like post an excerpt#and months later youll find something posted on anon and youll be like oh! so they finally posted it!#so to spare you all (lies on my tummy like we're at a sleepover and giggles) you wanna hear what im working on#haha of course you do youre a prisoner in my yap box#and i want an excuse to talk about it hidden in the tags so people skim over it and not read it <3#SO the earliest wip is from like early october about a magical realism au because i rewatched lwa as i usually do and well theres this one#ep about a magical animal if you will... and you can kinda guess what it is from that lol its sashaforsyekky#because the dreaded @/tungpin infected me with the brainworms about this trio specifically#and it really is ekky going 🥺 at whatever sashaforsy have (persumably) got going on woe is him its at 5k rn but uh ive stalled progress#because puppyekky has consumed my every thought which leads me to my second wip that ive been labouring over since the start of october#that also just broke 5k and not even remotely done lol whoops but its puppy ekky in a team environment with a heavy emphasis on the euros#rn there are scenes scrabbled out with sasha (multiple) mikksy luosty lundy and forsy. i know i have an idea for bobby.#and really lets see where the muse takes us i have vague ideas that are mmmhmm but we'll see when we get there!#the third one isnt the most likely to get finished but uh it is sashamaffhew global series stuff because it stemmed from#“it really is funny that sasha is treating the finland trip like he knocked up a girl#and is trying to make her meet his parents so it doesnt feel like a shotgun wedding when he you know marries her to take responsibility“#and i just think a maffhew pov with that thought in mind because of the whole touchy at e11even thing is funny to me like think mundane#slice of life oh i feel like im being wined and dined i hope i dont fuck it up jfc i think im fucking it up oh god this feels romantic#anyways it feels remotely ooc to me and it really was more of like a writing break from the wips stated above so (shrugs)#might not see the light of day but its 2k as of now so i do feel its a shame if i dont /try/ to finish it you know? its just low priority#anyways thats my writing check in and i am a prisoner to my own mind i will go insane haha these wont be published anytime soon#because i am slow and get distracted soooo easily so you know <3
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