#and i will say. my heart rate went up when i realized that the annoying person was just like *them*.

[american-neurotypical]

saw someone on the internet who was being annoying today

my life is literally so difficult

[felinecyan]

When The Night Calls

[Izuku Midoriya x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: Your best friend leaving the hero course was enough to make you lose your mind. Especially when he’s suddenly standing across from you with nothing but a tired smile.

WC: 2978

Category: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Vigilante!Deku

Please give this one extra love!! Somehow Midoriya is also very suspiciously difficult to write 👀 (Also, that 3rd-degree burn I gave my hand today is making me want to cry and throw myself in a river. Damn you, AO3 curse!! )

『••✎••』

Seeing that letter taped on your door broke you in more ways than one.

He had been gone for almost a week, but his note left behind made you realize just how long it'd been. How long he had left you with nothing more than a simple explanation of his departure and how it felt like he was never coming back.

The entire class had been on edge ever since. The note even threw Bakugo for a loop, as much as he would deny it. It had everyone wondering where he was and if he was okay.

It hurt you the most, though. He was the closest friend you had and the only one who truly understood your feelings.

But now he was gone.

Aizawa still continued teaching, but with Midoriya absent, the class just couldn't focus. He wasn't as good at making things seem less depressing or stressful, and his lectures were just boring without a green bush to lighten the mood. Or at least, you thought so.

You haven't been paying much attention lately, and you're too busy thinking of your missing friend. Your grades had been slipping, but it wasn't like anyone could blame you. Even if your friends could, they didn't say anything.

They had tried talking to you, but all you could do was give them a half-hearted smile, shake your head, and tell them, "I'm fine."

You weren't fine, and you knew that. But what were you supposed to do? Cry about it? It’s not like he’d come back if you did that.

Ironically, he did technically come back.

That day, Aizawa decided to keep the pain everyone felt about Midoriya buried beneath the surface, so he assigned you all a ten-page essay about the history of quirks.

So, here you were, writing a half-assed essay close to two in the morning. Kaminari was blowing up the group chat with memes and random jokes, but no one seemed to care or even respond.

Well, that was until Bakugo started yelling at him to stop texting because he was trying to sleep.

That went on for about a solid ten minutes, with everyone getting annoyed at the two idiots, but eventually, it died down.

You took a glance at the clock, which now read 2:12 a.m.

Sleep just couldn't come to you. Not now, not when your brain was filled with thoughts of the broccoli boi.

Then, there was a tiny patter against your window, almost like a knock. If it hadn’t been so quiet, you might not have heard it.

You ignored it at first, of course, but it continued, the knocks getting louder and more urgent.

Finally, you stood from your chair, deciding to investigate, but then, the knocking stopped.

You paused, confused, but shrugged, figuring you must have been hearing things.

Yeah, right, because hearing knocks on your dorm window at 2 a.m. is normal.

It turned out to be a good thing you got up because when you turned back around, a figure was directly behind you.

You jumped back in fear, letting out a short shriek before slapping your hands over your mouth. The side eye glance to your window, now open and curtain rustling in the slight wind, had you regretting not locking the damn thing.

The figure let out a small chuckle, his shoulders shaking a bit, and your heart rate sped up.

You could see the person a lot better now that they weren't in the shadows, but the moonlight still kept their face hidden.

All you could see was the curly mess of green hair and a large hoodie with a black mask pulled over the bottom half of their face.

But you didn’t have to see his eyes to know exactly who it was.

Your hands fell limply to your sides as the boy stepped closer. His hand reached the hood of his suit, slowly pulling it off, and his bright, emerald green eyes were staring straight into yours.

The only thing you could do was stare, dumbfounded.

"You did lock it, by the way," the boy's voice said. It sounded hoarse and scratchy as if he hadn't spoken in days. He probably hadn't.

Still, his intuition never failed.

You continued to stare, eyes wide and unblinking.

Midoriya's brow furrowed, a look of worry replacing his smile.

"They really should put more difficult locks on these things. I mean, honestly, all I had to do was twist it, and it opened. If I were a villain, then— hmph!"

Your arms wrapped around his neck tightly, cutting him off. His eyes widened, surprised, but eventually, he relaxed, wrapping his own arms around your waist and pulling you closer.

"I was so worried," you said. You could feel your body starting to tremble, tears pricking your eyes. "Everyone was."

His arms tightened, his chin resting on your shoulder.

"I know. I'm sorry," he whispered, his breath tickling your ear. "I couldn't think of any other way."

You leaned back a bit enough to look him in the eyes. His tired, determined eyes.

"Wait, if you’re here… does that mean...?"

"I need my notebook." He kept his frown, and a sigh escaped his lips. "You have my old notes, right? I need those."

Oh.

That was it.

That was why he was back.

"Oh," You failed to hide the disappointment in your tone. "Right, uh, hold on…"

You pulled away, your eyes looking away from his. You could feel his eyes burning into the back of your head as you walked over to the desk, rummaging through the drawer.

Speaking of, your desk was an absolute disaster. If allowing students in your dorm room wasn't against the rules, Iida would have broken down your door a long time ago, screaming at the top of his lungs about how your room was in utter chaos.

Eventually, you found it. It was covered in sticky notes, and some of the pages were folded. Makes sense, considering the fact that you'd spent the last week reading it, studying, and hoping to find some kind of clue about his whereabouts and the league itself.

But even if it was in your hands, screaming for its owner, you hesitated. He was going to leave again, wasn't he? He wasn't going to stay.

But common sense hit you. You couldn’t force him to stay. It would be selfish of you to even ask.

You turned, walking back over to him. He was staring intently at the ground, his eyes narrowed in concentration, and he had a small frown on his face.

When you were a couple of feet away, he finally looked up, his hand reaching out for the book.

"Here," you said, trying not to let the sadness seep into your words. "Don’t mind the added stickies. Simpler terms, easier to understand, you know?"

"Right, thanks," he murmured, his eyes darting over the cover before flipping through the pages. His brows were scrunched together, and his fingers fiddled with the pages, flipping through them with a practiced speed.

He was so concentrated on the notebook that he didn't see your frown, and he didn't see the sadness in your eyes.

But then, he froze.

His eyes scanned over one of the pages, his fingers tightening around the spine of the book, and his breath hitched.

His eyes flickered up to yours, and his lips were set in a tight line.

"You read this?"

"Huh?" You blinked, taken aback. "Was I… not supposed to read it all?"

"What? No, no, I meant this page."

He flipped the book around, opening it to a certain page, and held it up for you to see.

Oh, yeah, his page. The one where he wrote about himself. Which, proudly, you knew most of what was written in it, anyway. Some things caught you off guard, but not many.

"Oh, yeah, I skimmed over it," you admitted.

"And... how much did you skim over?"

"Um... all of it? I mean, I'm in your hero notes, too. I took a lot more of my time on the page dedicated to me, I have to admit, but uh… What's the big deal?"

Midoriya looked at you, and his gaze was intense. "Did you… miss me that much that you would study my hero notes that closely?"

"Well, I wouldn’t say closely—"

He tilted his head in an almost sarcastic manner, and his eyes narrowed as he leaned over to point at a section in his notes.

A bright pink sticky note, covered in stars, was stuck onto the paper.

It was a small part, a very short paragraph, and you had given your analysis of him and not of his quirk either. It was a list of his attributes, his personality, and the type of hero he was.

To someone else, it would be pretty informative about what kind of person he was and what kind of hero he would be, but you both knew the true meaning behind the note.

Because it was all the things you missed about him.

"… oh, " was all you could say.

The air around you two suddenly became awkward, the silence becoming heavy.

The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

But, as expected, Midoriya broke the silence.

"I figured since you’re still awake, it must mean that you're working on homework or studying, and you wouldn’t do that at night if I weren’t gone," he began. "I thought that maybe it would be too soon to come back, or even that I should have stayed away, but, well, I really needed my notes, and, honestly, I wanted to see you, and—!"

He was rambling again. You could practically see the gears turning in his head, his brain spitting out more words than his mouth could.

At least he was still himself, you thought.

You decided to cut him off, placing your hand on his arm, and he jolted at the sudden contact, his head snapping back up to yours.

"I’m sorry," you said, looking down.

He looked confused, tilting his head. "What for? You have nothing to be sorry for; you didn't do anything wrong."

"No, I—" You cut yourself off, biting your lip, and looked away. You took a deep breath before speaking.

"I'm sorry," you started. "For not stopping you. For not coming with you. For not helping you. I had no idea what you were going through, and I was too worried about myself, and I didn't—"

"Hey, hey, stop," Midoriya said, placing his hand on your shoulder. You hadn't realized you were shaking. "This is my fight, okay? It's not yours, and I was the one who didn’t want to bring anyone else into this mess. This isn’t your fault, so please don’t beat yourself up about it."

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do." You looked back up at him, tears blurring your vision. "I don’t know how to help."

He was silent for a moment, but then, he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you once again, and you buried your head in his chest, gripping the fabric of his hoodie.

"It's okay," he said. "I don’t expect you to know how to help, and I didn’t come here for your help. Well, technically, I did since you had my notebook, but I’m speaking on a—"

“I know, I know," you mumbled.

Another moment of silence, and then, he sighed, a puff of air brushing your ear.

"I'm not sure when I'll be back, if I ever will, but I promise," he whispered, his breath tickling your ear and his words making your heart skip a beat. "I promise we will be fine. We all will. Me, you, everyone else. It might take a while, but we will be okay."

You nodded, your grip on his hoodie tightening. This was the sound of a goodbye, and the finality of it terrified you.

"It’s just…" you mumbled, and his brow furrowed.

"Just what?"

You hesitated, a lump forming in your throat.

"What?" He repeated, pulling back to look you in the eye. "Please tell me."

You took a deep breath, swallowed the lump, and looked him in the eye.

"It's just that... You’re my not-alone buddy, remember?”

Midoriya froze, his eyes widening.

It was a little game you two had back when things weren’t so complicated. Back when you were just normal students.

You both struggled to make friends, so you made a pact. Obviously, that thought disbanded when everyone else got close, and now you all were pretty good friends, but the friendship between him and you was different. It was a bond between you two that was just special.

Not even ‘Kacchan’ could ruin that, as close as he and Midoriya grew.

You never called him Deku, even after Bakugo and the rest of the class started calling him by the nickname. Sure, it was his hero name, and you could call him that, but you just never felt comfortable.

Todoroki didn’t either, but then again, Todoroki didn't call anyone by their nicknames.

But, back to the point.

"We made a pact, and... that was one of the things I wrote on the sticky notes." You gestured to the book. "It was during my angry denial phase, so I’m not that proud of it, but… it was still true."

"You were angry?" He asked, confused. "Why?"

"Well, first of all, I was worried sick. I knew you were going to go do something stupid, and obviously, I was right.”

He winced at that.

"But I was angry because you didn’t trust me, and I felt like you were leaving me, too," you said, biting your lip. "I know that sounds stupid and selfish, and I get that this was your battle, not mine, and I can't change that, but... I guess I was just scared. You didn’t even tell me before you left, and the note was just..."

You trailed off, a lump forming in your throat again, and your eyes burned with tears.

You didn't want to cry in front of him, so you buried your face in his chest again, and his grip tightened around you.

"I'm sorry," he apologized.

You shook your head. "Don’t apologize. It's not like you're changing your mind."

He was quiet for a moment, his head lowering and his lips resting on your forehead.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Your breath hitched. "Izuku, please don't say it."

He pulled back, and his face was unreadable. He looked determined, his eyes burning with passion, and it hurt. It hurt to know that, despite everything, he still had his mind made up.

"I have to go," he said, and his voice was quiet. "I don’t want to leave you alone. I really don’t, but I have to, and you need to stay safe. Me being here isn't doing anything good, and I can't keep coming back and putting you in danger. So, for now, at least until the Shigaraki is dealt with, please just be safe. Don’t try and find me, and please don't let anyone else know I was here."

He paused, his eyes glancing towards the window.

"Actually, I might come back just to get rid of that lock. I mean, seriously, I barely even touched it, and it came right off. You could easily replace it with something stronger, maybe one of those new locks that only respond to fingerprints! But, then it can be traced back to you, and they can use you to— oh, man, I'm rambling again, aren't I?"

You didn't bother to respond. Instead, you leaned up, pressing your lips against his cheek.

Midoriya's entire face went bright red, his mouth opening and closing like a fish.

You could feel your face burning, but it was worth it to see his reaction.

"Be careful," you said. "Please, Izu, don’t be stupid."

"R-Right."

He stumbled a bit, his hand coming up to touch the spot where your lips were. His eyes flickered back to you, and you swore you saw him blushing, but then he turned, heading towards the window.

"Oh, uhm, b-by the way," he said, reaching the window. He placed his hand on the frame, glancing back at you. "For Aizawa's essay, you have to also analyze the strengths and weaknesses, not just the evolution of quirks. Make sure to read the whole paragraph in that book he gave us at the beginning of the semester."

He gave you one last smile, pulling the mask over his mouth and the hood over his head. You looked in befuddlement as he stepped out onto the roof, and your hands were wrapped around the edges of the open window.

"How did you—"

"It's Aizawa," His mask was muffling his voice, so he lifted it up a bit, and his eyes twinkled. "What else do you expect from him?"

And then he jumped.

He let the mask drop back down and became just another shadow in the night, with his green lightning trailing behind him.

You didn’t have the energy to laugh, and you didn't have the heart.

You leaned against the windowsill, letting the cool night air wash over your face. You sighed, watching the clouds drift in the sky.

"You're still an idiot," you whispered, closing your eyes.

When the sun rises, this encounter will only be a distant memory.

But for now, the cold night was enough to convince you otherwise. For now, his green eyes were staring up at the same night sky, and he was thinking of you, too.

That kiss on the cheek, as tame as it was, was still enough to make his head spin. You were still his friend, his not-alone buddy, and nothing was going to change that.

And you both were okay with that.

[hhighkey]

Taken, part 2 // Uvogin, one shot - part of hhighkey's phantom troupe universe series

Rating: mature Story Contains: stockholm syndrome, love??, implied past kidnapping, implied references to depression, suicidal thoughts, unnamed chronic illness, medical inaccuracies, marriage, rough sex, size kink, lots of come im so sorry, manipulation, female reader Note: about 17k words, ao3 link: xxx, link to part 1

The union could never be legal, technically Uvogin didn’t exist, but that didn’t matter. Not to you when he confidently proposed with the biggest grin months after getting you back from Bates, going on a ramble about the thought of you being someone else’s wife terrified him. To him, it furthered his ownership of you, and was another way to show his utmost commitment and love. Not that kidnapping you four years ago was a total display of it or anything… That it took someone else trying to marry you for him to think of it. 

Never sure what to categorize as the happiest day of your life, for now that day took the cake. How even on one knee he was taller than you, a gorgeous ring in hand (you could thank Chrollo for that as you found out later). The idea of being someone’s wife when you were little had been like a dream, you’d always gawk at wedding stores and the dresses on display. It was more of a fantasy to look the prettiest surrounded by even prettier decor, not necessarily about the concept of ‘in life and death.’ After so long with Uvogin you understood that marriage wasn’t about a gorgeous wedding but about the vows and status it brought. Because your relationship with Uvogin was the epitome of together until death. And with each day getting harder to get out of bed, blood painting your tissues after coughing, you realize that death is on the horizon.

However, for the last few weeks Uvogin was doing his best to avoid a certain group. The term ‘bachelorette party’ became a forbidden term to me murmured around him, it’d be a night where he’d have no control. However, three people weren’t letting him off easy as you found amusement in him trapped.

“Fuck no.” Uvogin grunted, eyes tensely looking over the three female Troupe members, “She doesn't leave my sight when I’m not workin’.” 

“It’s a thing Uvo.” Machi said, “You’re not supposed to see the bride a few days leading up to the wedding, especially the night before and day of.”

“Okay so you can have her tomorrow then.” He waves them off, going to grab your arm, but Machi cuts him off stepping in front of you.

“No, you can survive two days without her.” 

“Whaddya wanna do babe?” He focused on you, pretending not to hear the pink haired woman. 

Your mouth falls open as you glance between Uvo and Machi. Your chest flutters with discomfort being in the middle of a strange face-off, where you particularly didn’t want to see Uvogin perturbed with you if you agreed with the girls. “Um..” 

“The four of us are going to do something tonight.” Pakunoda steps in, her voice level like she were talking to an overly large toddler not getting its way. 

“Like what?” 

“None of your business.” She stared at the larger man down. 

“Well Y/N’s my business so, anything she does is my business.” 

“It’s bad enough we can’t force Phinks and Feitan to let us have their girls, but let the poor bride-to-be have a bachelorette party where nothing can possibly happen. Then she’ll be your wife in two days and you can dictate the rest of her life, how about that?” Machi huffs, annoyed, “Go bother Nobu if you get bored but we’re taking her.”

“Yeah, no you ain’t.” He went to push past her, but she shot a hand up pressing on his chest. 

“What do you want to do, Y/N?” Machi asked. 

“I- Uvo I would really like to spend time with them.” With a slowly ticking clock on your life due to the state of your health, you think you should say what you want. For a second you remember, like a little flicker at the back of your brain, times spent with friends shopping, movies, gossiping about boys. Makes your heart yearn for that type of connection again. Clarity seemed to leak into the depth of your mind the sicker you got. 

He frowned at you and time seemed to stop until he nodded, “Alright.”

“That was easy, thought we’d have to steal her in the middle of the night.” Shizuku said absentmindedly, which earned her a few glares. 

Uvo fretted over you before he let you go, fingers prodding along your delicate skin as if you were the most precious treasure, as if you’d break from one touch alone. 

“Behave.” His words come across as a warning but you hear the depth to it, the worry rather than a threat. 

“I always do.” You tease, moving to hug his thick, muscular torso. A small part of you wants him to scoop you up and lock you away with him, your heart beginning to panic at the idea of separating from him. Yet your mind told you to stay strong no matter how badly you wanted to melt right into him. 

Uvogin made a few more tiny threats towards the girls before he finally left, telling you he’d be at the Base. For a moment your chest twisted in pain knowing he’d be hours away, not working. You could survive being without him due to his job, but not knowing he was free.

So you stood in your townhome with Machi, Paku and Shizuku watching you. Sure, you considered them your friends at this point, slowly considered most members of the Troupe your friends. Yet you knew their loyalty to you was really loyalty to Uvogin, the help protecting you, keeping you healthy, keeping you happy- was all for him. While you’re sure they care for you as a person enough to make small talk, you’re Uvogin’s property through and through. But this moment as you debated what to do, made you want to feel hopeful. The three of them didn’t need to do this. It made no sense for them to fight with Uvo for days to let them host something. 

How Machi’s fingers dug into your bicep as you involuntarily took steps forward, 

“Don’t.”

You didn’t know how to be without him. Your body was slowly dying, and not the dramatic bullshit of aging. So perhaps it was quickly dying. The ever exhausting fog you lived in where all you had was Uvogin to care for you. His warmth disappearing from the room settled a chill and awareness. 

Machi has her normal blank expression, but she seems pleased when you nod, “So, what are we doing tonight?”

The looks exchanged made you wary. 

The devilish upturn of Machi’s lips makes you wonder if you should go run back to Uvo. But the part of you, stuck oh so deep down, that couldn’t rebel for years was overjoyed as it wretched its way out. 

“We are going out.”

“Out..?”

“You know, what normal girls do, dress up and get drunk, flirt with men.” 

You cringe at the last part, discomfort swirling in your gut. Normality. Normal girls. You play the words over and over, hearing her words echo as a harsh reminder. But also self reflection as these three weren’t normal either. Farther from it and yourself. Perhaps you nodded, agreeing to the location they wanted, because you’d missed out on so much. Though the sour taste in your mouth lingers as you all get ready as if it were any other night- that everyone in the Troupe was all aware of the fact Uvo kidnapped you. No one told him that he should reconsider, that it’d be selfish. But did you even want that? Would you have wanted Machi or Nobu to tell him to let you go? Because the thought makes your stomach flutter with wrenching nerves you don’t want to think about, as society’s version of normal wasn’t yours. And like that, you snapped back to the image staring back at you in the mirror, the girl chronically ill yet irrevocably in love with someone they shouldn’t be.

You look- strange. Yet you’re taken aback by the beautiful girl Paku had turned you into, makeup breathing life back into your sullen state. A flash of somebody else, a younger version of you reflected, prior to knowing what you’d become and with who. It’s nostalgic almost, thinking about the minimal times you’d gone to a bar with a coworker or an old school friend, how you debated over what to wear or how to do your hair. With Uvo it was simple- he didn’t care what was on your body, or if you had makeup, he controlled everything you could and couldn’t do and it simplified everything. 

The dress fit you like a glove, pushing cleavage up and you wanted to retreat into yourself.

The night sky preys down on you. Buildings feeling like they were closing in, the openness of the town, the fresh air felt like a jail. The fact you were in the open with options was suffocating, but you walked with your arm linked with Paku’s trying to save face. Trying to push down your insecurities and thoughts of Uvo getting angry with you. He’d never have let you wear this, never had let Machi push a shot of vodka down your throat prior to leaving. Thrilling. Yet terrifying. The best way to sum up what coursed through your veins while wanting to turn around at the same time. 

The lack of alcohol the last five or so years was clear, the shot made your cheeks tinged pink and a dazed smile on your lips. You tried hard now to sway as you walked and luckily the cool breeze against you the last few minutes helped to bring you back down. The taste of it was exhilarating- dancing on the edge of inebriation and the thoughts that came with it!

“I- Can’t.” You take a step back, “Too many people- I can’t.”

“Hey- Y/N.” 

You stare at the ground as you stumble back to some steps, letting the cold pavement press against you. Stuck inside yourself as your world spun you began to ramble, 

“I- Only people I’ve been around are the Troupe. No more than 12, never more. A-And Bates kept people away from me. No- No, too many. Feels suffocating, like I can’t breathe.” You look at them with terror written across your face, “Why are you all doing this for me? Because you know I’ll die? Or because you feel bad for me? Y-You know he kidnapped me, I’m not allowed to use phones or see my old friends, my family thinks I’m dead. Yet…” 

Machi crouches down to get eye level with you, “You deserve a night of freedom and fun you should have had. You’ve given all of us more kindness than we deserve all these years. And Uvo has never been happier in all the time we’ve known him. We want to repay it back before you die as his wife.” 

“We’ll take any backlash that comes of this, with your state Uvo wouldn’t dare to upset you.” Paku said, correctly inferring the nagging at the back of your mind that this would make him furious.

“You could get away with a lot more than you realize because he’s terrified of you dying, remember that.” Machi’s intensity bores into you in a way that makes you sit straight up. Either from the fact her nen could kill you in an instant or she was trying to instill you with a backbone. 

“How much longer do you have, Y/N?” Shizuku asked. 

“I… Don’t know.” You push your fingers against your temple, trying to stifle the weight of everything on your shoulders. The sting of the vodka still in the back of your throat, your eyes focused on the heels you wore. 

“A year at most, probably eight months.” Machi replied.

“Why- Why would Uvo be scared to upset me? Hasn’t stopped him before.” You flinch at the reminder of your impending doom, no matter how much you were coming to terms with it; It was Uvogin’s karma.

“With my non-professional medical guess, who's been there since the start, is that there’s so much medicine can do if you’re giving up. Uvo doesn’t want you to want to die, selfishly wants you to hang on for as long as possible even if you’re in pain.”

Oh. It felt like you hit a wall. A harsh wave of soberness and the realization of where you were, “I wondered, why it took him so long to think of marrying me? Did Bates love me more to go through those lengths? What did I do to deserve all this?”

No one spoke. It would have been hypocritical for them to, they were just as big of monsters as Uvo. That they didn’t need you looking at the situation from an outsider’s viewpoint anymore, a discomfort settled within their guts. 

“Can we- still go to that bar?” You ask, breaking the silence you caused. 

As much as you spilled to them unprompted, knowing your words wouldn’t spur them emotionally to do anything, you were always smart not to let anyone in on the doubt you felt. On the anxiousness since Bates, on the second guessing if your emotions for Uvo were real. You knew everyone would take it wrong, that you’d been indoctrinated or rebelling. 

Because hadn’t Uvo washed away every insecurity that made you doubt your love? All this hushed proclamations whilst his cock was buried in your guts. The small touches and the fact you no longer had to lift a finger. His ever permanent seeming presence. Right? Ringing struck up in your ears forcing you to shake it off, Right. Right. No question about it as you stared at the ring on your left finger. You were excited to be his wife, to further cement your love. You had to be. 

“Of course,” Paku said, “Let’s go. You can hold onto us as much as you need.” 

Everything was a blur after they helped you up from the step, urging you to forget about your woes. The line wasn’t a long wait before you’re stepping into what felt like an alternate dimension. Thick sweat-infused-air with the smell of alcohol, bodies shoved like sardines, and strobe lights beamed around. 

Music. Music! Oh it made you sway in utter glee as the bass reverberated in the depth of your soul. You felt like a fish out of water with your fingers intertwined with Paku’s, looking around the room like an awe struck child seeing the world for the first time. 

A glass was shoved in your hand and you indulged, then again, and again. Uncaring for the strength of the liquor or the overly sweet syrups, the taste of freedom was absolutely addicting. How you’d missed alcohol in all this time, you’d beg Uvo to let you drink again. Soon your vision blurred along with your doubts. 

It was tiring always worrying. Always wondering. Being on edge. Doubting. It made you suffocate and being able to let go was pure relief. Giggle and laugh with the three Troupe members like any other friend group would. Even if they weren’t as into or as relaxed as you, watching your every move, you didn’t mind. They were doing this for you.

Any man that approached you was shooed off with a threatening glance from Machi. You were encapsulated in a perfect bubble as you bounced around sucking down another tequila infused drink. Not caring that you didn’t know any of the lyrics because this was music you’d never heard before. When was the last time you’d listened to music? You stop as you warm, bodies pressing to you, and you realize you don’t know. 

You tug your dress further down your thighs, attempting to cover more. You falter in your steps and arms are on your waist in an instant. 

“Ready?” Shizuku stares through her glasses at you.

You nod. Was it late? How long had you been inside the club dancing to your heart's content as your mind went to mush. 

The air outside was frigid compared to your body’s temperature, to the red flush along your skin and sweat beading at your hairline. Hair a frizzy mess. Mascara smeared under your eyes with the glitter from atop your lids. You hadn’t smiled so big in so long, to the point your cheeks ached as you tried to skip along the paved sidewalks, giggling like a madwoman. Pakunoda never let you get far though, listened and responded to your entertainingly slurred words and statements. And how you slowly began to wear down, to slow in your steps as you wrapped an arm around her. Contentment resonated from you. 

They’re on edge first, you not noticing the sudden change in atmosphere. That the aura around you all dropped, anger seething through it. Three forms stood past the turn. One particularly large. 

Uvogin. Flanked by Nobu and Phinks, who looked more annoyed than anything. Yet it wasn’t them that brought concern, because Uvo looked halfway ready to destroy the local buildings. 

“The fuck are you all doin’? Thinking you can take my soon to be wife out to get drunk, take ‘er somewhere I don’t fucking know.” He’s rigid, a murderous aura surrounding him. Muscles flexing as his jaw locked. Oh Uvogin was a big and terrifying man yet you looked at him like the dark, bustling city was naught. 

“Uvo!” You squeal, delighted, your core flush with warmth as you don’t notice his anger. Your thoughts are screaming for him, chanting his name like a prayer because there he is! He’s suddenly in your sights, though you aren’t sure why there’s two of him, but all you want is to squeeze him, take him for yourself. The way his thighs squeezed against the fabric of his shorts you narrowed in on, thinking about running your hands against them, prodding into the skin. Massaging and kissing and moving to his thick co- your core goes warm, such liquid goodness that you can’t fathom being away from him any longer, your daydream making you go numb.

You push off Paku and skip over to Uvo, practically throwing yourself into him. Which he caught you with ease even without prior notice. You nuzzled into his warmth, feeling his calloused fingers run along your arms. You don’t feel how he tugged down your dress as it’d ridden up, or as he checked for any marks. And you certainly didn’t feel the genuine panic, terror past jealousy of you drunk around others. The fear of you out without him. Finding someone else more interesting upon realizing how much he’d taken from you. Living a life that didn’t include him. And if you wanted said life back over what you two built on the cracked foundations only help up on your (possibly) messed up sense of reality. 

“Hi baby.” Uvo said in a fairly choked back tone; his attempt to seem relaxed towards you while he was really seething. In his mind he had to blame his fellow Spiders, that this was on them, not you. 

“Want you.” You whined softly, eyes filled with heated want that bore into him. Your palms flat on his chest feeling his erratic heart beat like it was your lifeline, “Missed you.”

You don’t remember much, not as you swayed in his grasp, vision splitting your environment from doubles to triples. The hazed joy settled into a comfortable exhaustion as your eyelids drooped, uncaring for the voices that argued around you. It doesn’t matter that it’s getting heated, not to you, this night has been better than the stars above. Topped off with Uvogin at the end. As your head falls limp, knees buckling, your last drunken thought is on the wedding. 

Feeling your body beginning to go limp as you mewled into him, Uvo picks you up cradling you into him. Your touch grounded him. Your excitement to see him might have been what stopped a possible massacre powered by his anger and fists alone. You’d missed him terribly even when you had the whole world at your fingers, and he loved that. Filled him with a sense of pride. 

“We’re going.” Uvogin nodded to Nobu and Phinks.

“Good fucking thing I didn’t let my girl come. Will have to tell Feitan ‘bout this.” Phinks grumbled under his breath.

“We’re heading back to Base.” Nobunaga tells the girls, “Come if you want, will be a tight squeeze.”

The group began their departure, silence amongst a still bustling town. Tension thick enough to cut with a knife, trepidation building within a few of the Spiders. Strange looks from some, especially at the large man carrying a girl who looked like she had a rough night out. 

Soon buildings died out. Lights limited. Roads turning to dirt, fences showcasing expansive private overgrown property. Countryside came into view with a car waiting, as Phinks pulled out the keys. For a second they all share uncomfortable glances unsure how they’ll all fit, but one person in particular had a dark cloud above her.  

“Uvogin.” Machi said dangerously low, fists clenched and Shizuku ready to grab her if needed. “How long have you had her now, four years, or is it five? She’s not going anywhere she’s in love with you, as much as she’s able. She doesn’t know how to think without you telling her what to think about, nonetheless run away anywhere. Where would she go? She relies on you for everything and more, you are her life. And she’s happy about it I guess, babbled about you all night. She doesn’t have long and you know it, don’t let her go it’ll do more harm than good but… let her say goodbyes. Proper ones to those you took her from.”  

“No.” He responded without pause, “You’ve gone soft, Machi I’m surprised. I ain’t letting her out my sight from here on out, I’ll let Chrollo know I need a fucking sabbatical or something. You’ll be lucky if I let any of you see her again.” 

“She’d be upset about that.”

“Whatever.” 

“You say that now.” She knew he was bluffing, and of course he was. 

He squeezed your sleeping frame before settling into the passenger seat of the car, keeping you tight to him. He stared at your angelic form feeling his heart squeeze, “Don’t do something like this again. And one day maybe you might understand a sliver of what I feel for her and why I do what I do.”

Uvogin couldn’t fathom missing another one of your breaths. Not a single one. Because from here on out he’d claim them all as his. 

-

This was how it was meant to be- your wedding day- you realize as you stare at your reflection. You remember the attempted one with Bates felt like walking to your doom, while this time around with Uvo? It felt like you were walking through a floralled field surrounded by a thick lavender odor, heading towards the rest of your life. It felt right. 

A white gown flows along your emaciated body that has a faint golden sheen from the joy swirling within you. Excitement coursed in your veins as you finished final touches for your hair and makeup, relying on Paku heavily for assistance. 

It’s Fall, the orange and red leaves falling delicately around you as you carefully walk along a gravel path with grass laying flat from overuse. The cooling air filled with a cinnamon spice odor so acutely that of the lengthening nights as Hallow’s Eve was around the corner. Feeling wrapped in the comfort of your favorite season, a molten liquid spread as you inched closer and closer to the altar. Arm looped in Paku’s, a smile lives etched on your face as tears prick at your eyes, swirling sentient settling within. After much convincing, Uvogin agreed to an outdoor wedding at sunset, not being able to say no to you. The Trope had done an immaculate job at setting up a cozy venue

It was a whirlwind. Walking down the aisle to Uvogin. How he looked at you with misty eyes and utter happiness, looking devilishly handsome in a tailored suit, something you never imagined seeing him in. He towered over you with a powerful aura that made you feel safe. Nothing else existed when in Uvogin’s orbit. How his hands held yours, staring so intently like you were the entire world. That you were all that existed on this plane, that all he wanted was to whisk you away as soon as vows were shared. 

You were always his, but to Uvogin this tied you to him forever. Emotionally linked your cute self to him in a way that meant everything to you, while to him the title of marriage did little to change his feelings. It made your heart swell and your face beam with love, making this worth it in his eyes.  

And it was worth it to see you walking down the aisle to him. His pupils dilated, shoulders dropping, mouth quirked up at the sight of you in a white gown. An angel. His heart soared and he stood a tad straighter beaming with pride. 

Closer. Closer to him. Time seemed to slow as you both became so consciously aware of the other, of how your hearts raced in rhythm combining. Circulating souls, winding and meshing, flowing together like pieces of twine twisting and twisting. Paku handed you off to him and he’s lit with a burning need as your smaller hands slot into his perfectly. A necessity so pure, like a starving man who’d kill for his survival, burn the world to the ground to have you. 

Nothing else mattered besides you; not Chrollo who began the ceremony, not the eyes and pleasant words of the other Spiders and their partners (who stared hopeful at their lovers). 

Only your tears of merriment as you peered up at him like he was your savior, mattered. He was your salvation. The sweet words that left your lips as you cried through your vows with breathy laughs, built him up more and more. Uvogin’s vows were strong, filled with his promises of protection and love, his thinly-veiled apologies for the past and the excitement to continue as husband and wife. 

A faint cinnamon smell wafted on the breeze, heavy earthy-spice amongst the falling leaves. The sun is setting beyond the horizon. Dimming violet skies flourished as the ceremony ended- you in Uvogin’s arms as vows sealed with a kiss. A symphony of harmonious noises blurred out your surroundings, a deafening buzzing that should have made your stomach churn and your instincts blare red. Instead it’s elation that spurred your tunnel vision as you kiss your husband passionately uncaring for anything else. 

Maybe you were too far gone from the clarity you’d had, from the questions of Uvo’s real feelings you once picked apart. All of it drowned and stamped out. Glowing delight crammed into every vein and bone, to your most miniscule of nerves. Plugged up so thick with the taste of Uvogin that you’re almost drunk off his scent alone, off the way his eyes raked along your body. The thought of him looking and touching anywhere else made you want to die. Like he was the oxygen you breathed. A fresh intake of air seeping with amber and intoxicating caramel, the taste of a maple tree’s smoky bark going up your nostrils to the tip of your head. 

Dizzied by his musk. Dizzies as your mind buzzed like a million honey bees flew about in crazed circles. Unable to wipe the grin off your face as Uvogin picks you up Bridal style to carry you off. Marital bliss is already consuming the two of you whole, Uvogin’s aura a violent red as his chest swelled with possession. 

Every inch of Uvogin; from his flexing muscles to his grueling height where his toes tingle with want. He was wounded so tight. Chords pulling and pulling, fraying as they did, and any moment they’d snap. He’d snap. Flustering begins to control him and you can see it in his eyes. The fire. The lust. All of it.

Uvogin wastes no time getting to his corridor of the Base, since everyone wanted the loud man in his own area to reprieve them of his usual antics. 

And he wasted no time placing you on the bed with a thump, your giggles music to his ears. Pure joy shimmered across your features and it had been far too long since he’d seen it. Uvo relishes in it as he helps you out of the wedding gown (tries to help while you beg for him not to rip it). Because for the rest of the night he has plans that will keep you a mess on his cock as you cry and scream for more, drunk off overstimulation, none of your innocent happiness to be found. Only your reliance on him. Your need for him. 

You’re on your back faster than you can blink, Uvogin pulling you to the edge of the bed. On his knees between your thighs you watch him with insatiable lust clouding your eyes, your senses, sending little volts of electricity up your spine as his rough fingers traced the skin of your inner thighs. How he kneaded and stoked, your mewls and constant jerking making a devious look fall over him. 

“I ain’t gonna be nice, gonna fuck my pretty little wife til’ she can’t take it. Then I’m gonna keep going.” His breaths fans along your clothed cunt, your liquids beginning to soak through the white fabric. 

You nod, feeling the numb tingle of anticipation wash over your body. Your mind as if it hung out to dry, lust dulling your senses. 

The sudden onslaught of his tongue has you seeing stars. He knows exactly how to tease your entrance to make you squirm and gasp, knows how you like how he oscillates his long tongue inside you to pull out an orgasm. Stroking your inner thighs so playfully and feather like, 

“Uvo- pl-please!” You beg, fingers yanking at his scalp. You need him like you need oxygen to breathe. Your senses are so dull, the air smelling thick of your juices and sex, a tangy musk that is sweet because it’s because of your love for him that you feel this way.

“Need somethin’?” The vibrations of his deep voice sent shivers up your spine, your mind spinning in lust as with a flick of his tongue, the way it then drags along your folds brings you back to your high. 

Sobbing for him as you snap, squirt dribbles and he laps it up, sucking your engorged clit to make you shake. To make you tremble and jerk and try to push his face away as slurping noises fill the room. 

“Ne-ed you!” You sob, “In me!” Your head is spinning and all you can think about is having his cock stretching you out. 

He relinquishes with a final kiss above your clit, pulling to strip himself of his clothes.

Uvogin is more than aware of the size difference between you two, you’re so small beneath him, just so cute laying in awe at his naked hulking body as his hand goes to stroke his godly length. You’re so tiny, so breakable and while he is always as careful as a man like him can muster, right now all he wants to do fragment you into a thousand little pieces. 

“You’re so damn tiny, wife.” Blood rushes to his cock, hardening it even more as the tip leaks precum swollen and red. The way his hand engulfs parts of your leg as he gropes makes him burn and he knows he can’t hold back much longer. 

“You want this fat cock in your tight cunt? You wanna be nice and full, all stretched out? Gonna take all I give you?” 

“God yes, Uvo.” You keen, “Please, fill me.”

“Who do ya belong to, wife?” His eyes darken as he lines his cockhead up to your dripping entrance. 

You squirm and moan lewdly, unable to focus as pleasure grinds at your core, “Y-You Uvo! My husband, I’m yours- your wife- yours.” You babble as his swollen tip continues to tease you. 

“Cunt is mine.” He thrusts in fully, a silent scream escapes you as your eyes roll back. Uvogin’s cock pulses and he groans in pleasure, muscled legs trembling as his nerves are shot full of an addictive high from your body, “Tits are mine.” He engulfs one of your breasts in his hand, thumb rubbing over a pebbled nipple. “Whole damn body is mine. Your fucking mind is mine, I own you.” His thrusts turn erratic, slapping skin reverberates in the room as your little pussy takes his ginormous size and violent force behind each fuck against your cervix.

Already a mess, you’re easy to move, easy to morph as Uvo adjusts you on the bed. Angle was just right, your ankles held down at your head and his hips just so to drive into you so deep you won’t be able to walk. Your orgasm blossoms as squirt juts from your hole as Uvogin’s long cock spreads you too wide and too deep, the pain electric and overwhelming but your hips shake. 

“You’re so pretty baby, so damn good takin’ me like this.” He grunts, throwing his head back as he continues to fuck into you, his balls slapping against your ass. “I love ya, love how you squeeze me. You want my cum this bad? I’ll give it to you, get you nice and full from it. Take me deeper now, you can do it, yeah?” 

His vulgar words are disoriented in your ears but they make you feel obscene, make you smile sordidly with tears in your eyes, and nod like your life depended on it. 

You’re lost in his wicked aura. Your wedding night lived up to all you would have hoped for it, as your dress lay discarded and you were folded in different positions as your husband drove the both of you to pleasured highs again and again. Heavy spurts of come coated your insides, too much so that it trickled out and painted your thighs, painted the sheets. Again and again he plugged you with his cock and filled you with heavy grunts, letting you feel the hot come shooting out from him for far too long, far too much that you could almost taste it in your throat. He hit every sensitive spot you loved that made you feel mushy and braindead, just a reliant little thing on him. 

You couldn’t take it anymore. You could barely hold your head up or moan how much you loved him and his cock. Your eyelids grew heavier, while your body shook from the continued rapture. 

Uvogin kissed you so lovingly, so much so that it hid his true malicious intents you couldn’t understand in your fucked out state, “I got you baby, gonna let me use you?”

You nod. Smile like a drunken idiot, and go lax. You feel every thrust, every pulse and curve of his cock, each slap against your ass, each kiss, lick, grope along every open inch of skin. You knew this was heaven. Heaven as he pushed you to your chest, hiking back your ass and slamming in. Your poor cunt quivered, gaping wide from his girth as his come leaked out, lower tummy inflated and Uvogin watched you with a glint in his eyes, and he couldn’t keep his emotions in. He let out a monstrous roar, one the brute was known for, and he let you take every inch of him uncaring if you broke or said it was too much. But you took it. You always did. Even if your gummy walls tried to force him out, tried to tighten up too much but he’d always push past the defenses to claim you and feel your clamping cunt as it came, as it squirted. And god as he’d toy with your aching clit he’d see you spasm even in your passed out state.

His fingers gripped your hips, they’d leave bruises he’d stare at proudly tomorrow. And he knows more marks will follow, he needs to mark you, to show anyone who you belonged to on all open parts of your skin. Your eyelids were finally permanently closed at this point, once done-up hair a mess, makeup all smeared. Tiny mewls all that escaped your parted lips. Yet your pussy still squeezed him like a vice, milking him for all it was worth begging for more, “Still so fucking needy for me aren’t ya? Don’t worry I’ll fill you all night till I got nothing left, you know your husband will always take care of you.”

-

Uvogin could never help himself when it came to you from the second he laid eyes upon you. His feelings are too intense and overpowering of his superb fortitude, years of destruction and rigidness in his work. And it took awhile the first few months before he took you because he adored who you were, and did not want you to become a shallow version of yourself. But he always knew it was his job to protect you as your friend turned captor, turned partner, turned husband. 

What type of man was he if he couldn’t keep his love safe? He’d spent years diligently watching over you, even going as far as to check your body for harm. Make sure you ate well, slept enough, and had a good amount of things to keep you mentally entertained. He knew you like the back of his hand and it was why he struggled from the start when you couldn’t get healthy. But with his mind set on it, it would happen, he was sure. 

Uvogin wasn’t always suited for tough conversations when it came to you, overall happy with everything. Never complaining about not being able to contact anyone outside the Troupe or go outside without him or an escort. You stopped going stir crazy after accepting your feelings for home were true all those years ago, loving his clingy touches and loud humor. 

But as the weeks went on after the wedding, your state got worse. And so did his helplessness, the gut feeling that he was still not doing enough. His optimism wore on himself as much as it did you. 

Everything about you makes his heart race at such a speed he wonders if one day you’ll give him a heart attack. Simply based on his overly obsessive actions and thoughts, his every waking being is all for you. 

“Uvo, stop it.” You swat at his large hand that held a protein bar, “I’ll just throw it up. Don’t wanna.”

So maybe it was all coming to head after almost two years. Exasperation with the situation that turned into taking it out on the other. More or less you wanted a break from the pity, the treating you like a little porcelain doll by your lover. 

“You gotta eat, babe. Can’t survive off that baby food shit.” He sighed referencing the nasty apple sauces, ground up food into weird shakes that made him gag. 

“Better than nothing.” You murmur, staring aimlessly at the blankets you sat under.

Uvogin ran a hand through his hair, feeling disgruntled by your frail form not even looking at him. He moved towards the bathroom, dropping the bar in the trash. He wants to scoop you up, pin your chest to the mattress to fuck into you to hear you chant his name. 

He doesn’t mean to snap at you. But god he can’t fucking stand to watch what you’re doing, because he’s not stupid. He missed his girl, her smiles and snark, how she’d be equally all over him as he was towards her. His best friend and lover wrapped up in one. While he wasn’t cruel, swore if you were in pain then so was he, but he was tired of this push and pull. 

“You’re giving up.” His words come out harsher than he intended, but the bitterness bubbling up his throat spurred them on.

“Stop.” 

You wipe at your eyes because of the sudden tear that fell down your cheek. His words feel like a painful stab to the gut. 

“I can’t- I won’t watch you die, Y/N. Not even thinking about what this is doing to me. I can’t be without you.”

Anger filled you but you couldn’t breathe, dry heaving through your sudden sobs that hit you like an avalanche, “Doing to you? I’m the one dying, Uvogin. I’m the one in pain every day and every breath.”

He flinched at the usage of his full name. 

“Let me die, please it hurts so bad and I have fought. Fought for you, for us but I’m so tired. You need to let me go so you can move on with your life rather than be stuck as my caretaker.” Desperation laces your words, all you want is for him to hold you in his arms. Not for him to stand by the door with a faraway look. The sorrow on his features and the regret swirling in his eyes. You know he’s hurting, but this is destroying you.

“Is that what you think?” His fists clench, muscles going taut as they strain against his shirt, “That you’re a burden? That I’m better off without you? I take care of you because I love you, not out of some stupid fucking caretaker duty I’m obligated to.” 

“But aren’t you? You are the one who kidnapped me, you have to care for me or throw me to the curb if I’m not fulfilling my duties.” You spat, and you don’t regret the words as they slap him in the face making it twist in a dark glare. 

His brows pinched together, lips purse as he exhaled jadedly. The fierce mocking chuckle spewing out made your blood run cold, “We going there?”

“Maybe we should. We never have properly, always joking about it because it worked out for us. I downplayed what you did because you always respected me, kept me as me. Didn’t force me to fuck you, or be with you. And we always had amazing rapport even before that.” The aggravation of talking to him like he was a non-receptive 8ft plus wall made you want to rip your hair out. Not a flash of any emotions on his face leaving you to reel and second guess. 

“What’s the point of this babe? Gonna start throwin’ shit at me again? Begging me to let you go?”

“No!” You sit up straight, rolling your shoulders back feeling frustration and the sudden want to rip your hair out, “I love you. Only way I’ll ever want to leave is if you no longer feel the same, or if you hurt me. But jesus Uvogin, put yourself in my shoes even with your limited fucking ability to empathise. Because sometimes I wonder if you love me the way I love you, or if I have fucking stockholm syndrome!”

“What do you want me to say?” 

“The truth, how you really feel.” You press, almost as if you wanted him to snap. You’re tired of half truths, of him dumbing everything down like you’re a child.

“The truth?” His eyes narrowed as his chest thumped, felt like his insides were turning inside out in absolute agony, “Truth is I feel fuckin’ useless and you no longer care about living. You are leaving me, you’ll be dead. And now I’m hearin’ you think your feelings are fake? What a fucking time this is.”

“How am I supposed to not die, Uvogin? Tell me. I sleep all day, take handfuls of pills, IV for fluids. My body is rejecting it all and you don’t care that I’m in pain, you care more about having me around so you can get off.”

An explosion of red aura escapes him with a growl, his fist coming down on the closest piece of furniture. You gasp, heavy sobs returning as you recoil in ear. Realizing what he’d done, he tried to approach you, but you cried for him to stay away. Fear. Dizzied confusion written on you and Uvogin doesn’t know how to take it away. Not even the first few months after taking you, had you looked at him like that. And it made him want to die. 

“Y/N, M’sorry. Fuck. You’re my life, I love you. You aren’t some fucktoy to me, you’re the reason I breathe. And I’m so scared of the day I gotta live without you. It’s no excuse, but please. Would never hurt you, you’ve gotta know that right?”

You stare at him. Blank. Fingers gripping the blankets you used as a shield until your  knuckles turned white. Wet streaks falling down your face, off your jaw staining the fabric. 

“By begging me to stay alive… You are hurting me.” You whisper, but he can hear. 

“Fine,” He growls needing to leave your presence before he lashed out more, “Then you got my fucking permission to die, wife. I’m done.” 

He spares you no other glance as the door slammed behind him. You’re left trying to pick up the pieces, pick apart his words. Unable to hold back the flood of sorrow that seeped out, hysterical, airy cries as you heave. Pathetically quivering as you hugged yourself, slowly rocking back and forth atop the bed as it sets in. You think he means he’s done, he doesn’t want you, this is him washing his hands of you and your fate. 

You call for him, his name falling onto nothing, sniveling and blubbering like a mess. The air suffocates you, thick as it wrung you out. Dull skin prickling like a thousand needles inserting within you. Searing pain behind your brows and temples as it felt like your head was being crushed as your eyes went puffy and red.

Stuck in limbo staring at the wall. For months you’d been living under pitying glances, careful words, and locked up in an ivory tower of protection against the world. Even yourself. 

Your actions not your own as you move like a woman possessed, a ghost haunting the halls of its resting place. How you dressed for the colder weather outside the Base, discarding the disaster of splintered wood Uvogin left during his outburst. You moved with whimsical intent and glazed over eyes. In a trance as you padded along the eerily quiet halls then the main room, not a Spider in sight. Not that they could have stopped you, or even noticed as Uvogin’s screaming caused them to scatter. Pity as they had no choice but to listen as his deep voice echoed through every cranny spewing hurtful words.

Nobody stopped you as you opened the door to the outside. As you stand in the doorway contemplating stepping out, you realize it’s the first time you’ve been able to go somewhere without permission, with your own autonomy. With that you leave, crossing an invisible boundary that leaves you feeling lighter.

You walk, slow, stumbling as your lungs struggle to adapt. 

Unable to get far, you collapse unto a patch of grass, overlooking an expansive patch of trees overgrown with weeds and vines. 

On replay in your mind is the fight you’d just had with Uvogin, how his words sliced you deep. How he struggled with your pain, and how you spent too much time keeping your thoughts from him to ease his own. A selfish feat. But they were fearful, self deprecating thoughts that plagued you day in and out. The heaviness of accepting an eventual death that could be at any turn. The realization of your complacency and how the doubt Bates’s kidnapping of you set a spiraling turn of events. That you doubted your love feeling anxiety over his touch or telling him those three words- and how it made you selfish. More than ever. That you now saw Uvogin’s actions in the evil, manipulative light they were, and you did not care. Not anymore. His charismatic, strong nature over you was irrevocably his property, his wife, and this would have happened kidnapping or not. 

The cold, you feel yourself becoming one with it as your shallow breaths exhale fog around you. Your body feels numb as your pulse slows at an alarming pace. It’s comforting, serenely quiet before a high pitched noise sounds in your ears. The scenery is beautiful, you admire it as your eyelids droop, this was a good place to pass. To rest. The sky so blue, the sun high and bright, alluding to a perfect Summer day yet you shiver from the almost freezing temperature. 

You hear footsteps approaching and you hope it’s Uvo, that he’d get on his knees and beg for your forgiveness, that he’d make it up to you. But it’s not and you almost laugh, maybe he really did mean he was done with you. 

“Chrollo?” You jolted back to reality at the sight of the Phantom Troupe leader, at first having thought the figure was imaginary. In all these years you never conversed much, Uvogin having said the passing of his wife permanently altered him. 

“Y/N, dear.” His tone is gentle. He approaches and you see the heavy coat and blanket he carries.

“Don’t.” You stammer, “I’ve made my choice, I ask you to respect it. Just make sure he’s okay once I die. I used to think he deserved it after everything, after taking me but- god,” You let out an insane sounding laugh, “I don’t want to leave him, but I can’t live like this. Coughing up my lungs, blood, always tired, unable to eat. My body is giving out on me.”

“When I lost her, I thought my life was ending.” Chrollo laments, closing in on you to wrap you in the warm fabric. He takes a seat beside you, “It did. I’m forever stuck, unable to move on. And truly? I am okay with it. But there isn’t a thing I wouldn’t do for any members of the Troupe so they never have to experience the magnitude of losing your wife.”

“I understand but-”

“I want you to tell me what it is you truly want. If you could have one wish.”

You respond instantly, not needing to think of your answer, “To be healthy and live the rest of my life with Uvo.”

“I’m glad to hear that. I believe you.” Chrollo sighed, “I wanted to respect your wishes but I had a feeling you were accepting the path of a martyr as all roads appeared exhausted. I found someone, a skilled doctor from another continent who has treated and helped patients with symptoms similar to or more extreme than yours. He likes the challenges of strange chronic illnesses.”

You straighten, an invisible weight feeling like it’d been lifted off of you. Your mind is short circuiting however, as if you’d been unplugged. You’d had to come to terms with your impending doom after a multitude of medical avenues were taken at no expense. But Chrollo’s outreach must have been intense, it must have taken ages to discover if you’re only now hearing of it. 

Hope rushed into you. A re-ignited fire burning bright within, making the idea of living another day plausible. Something you wanted. 

“Does Uvo know? Where is he? He left me I… Thought he was done. That he didn’t want me-”

“I sent Feitan to find him, I wanted to talk to you first. The doctor is already on his way. I did not want to waste time if you agreed. And if you truly wanted to rest for eternity, I’d have sent him back.”

“How.. But the Troupe- please don’t kill him after.”

“No, it would be a waste. He is miniscule as a threat to us, I actually thought him to be dead all these years. I knew him briefly in Meteor City, he would come to treat the children.”

“Ah.” Knowing the doctor wouldn’t die for helping you released you from any possible qualms you’d have had, “Chrollo?”

“Yes?”

“I appreciate it, and I apologize for making you come out here.”

“Do not. Uvogin should be the one apologizing to you.” Chrollo stands with ease, then helps you stand, “I wouldn’t let him off easy, while we all deal with things in our own way, he’d have always regret walking out on you if it were the final time. We should never take time with our loved ones for granted. I am only glad I could find a possible solution for you.”

You’re swelling with appreciation, genuine happiness that you don’t think you’ve felt since the wedding. And before that? Prior to your initial pneumonia diagnosis almost 18 months ago. And definitely prior to Bates. With the burst of joy through your veins you want to throw your arms around Chrollo and thank him profusely some more, but that’s not something you’re physically capable of. Your legs can hardly hold you upwards as you two walk, him having to keep a firm grasp on your waist and arm in case. Slowly the path turned into the walkway for the Troupe’s base, the walking time taking practically double what it should have. But that’s okay, you’re too filled with ambition dreaming about having a normal functioning body once more even if Uvogin still wants to be done with you. 

Your teeth chatter, tips of your extremities a bright red from the chill. Unable to stop shaking even from the sudden heat inside. 

Chrollo helped you into your bed in Uvogin’s room, telling you he’ll have Machi swing by. The warmth of the room and the mound of blankets covering you, it’s suddenly easier to sleep than ever. For now you let yourself dream about good health, about treatments working, but still worry scraped the back of your mind when it came to your husband. Burning deep in your gut at the thought of your vows meaning nothing. As you begin to drift off–  

You hear a deep voice yelling laced with panic. Uvogin sounded ready to rage, to throw furniture across the room, you could picture the anger radiating from him through his tone. Because his words are hazy to you, and even as the door bursts open you’re unable to look. The feeling of large hands combing along your cool skin was the last thing you felt before falling into darkness. 

Uvogin shudders in relief as he watches your chest rise then fall. Your wind stained cheeks still pink as his thumb dragged along your face. He’s coming down from an intense adrenaline fueled high, his heart hammering in his chest ready to burst. How angry he’d been as Nobunaga followed hot on his trail attempting to put reason into him. And how Feitan appeared out of thin air with a look mixed with pity and contempt, saying Chrollo needed him for an emergency. How his stomach dropped filled with nauseating butterflies as his mind jumped to you, that him storming out left you vulnerable. That you fucking died somehow, as he’d let you think he was done. His selfishness towards his lack of control wracked him with guilt as he raced back to the Base. 

But instead Chrollo awaited him with a stern lecture even as he tried to push back yelling for you, body screaming for you to be against him. Yet Chrollo sat there amused over his idea to let Uvogin’s thoughts run rampant to a worse case scenario, sickeningly wanting him to feel the sorrow, the agony of losing you to get it through his thick head this wasn’t all about him. Then the leader informed him of the doctor on his way, giving one final effort to help you. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

Uvogin repeated as he pressed wet kisses to your skin, inhaling your scent like it was his own personal drug. His addiction to your frame in his as the bed creaked when he joined you under the blankets. 

How tiny you are compared to his monstrous form, precious and fragile as you subconsciously nuzzled into his warmth even in a half conscious slumber. He can feel all the cold that rattled you melt from your body due to his own heat, how you no longer shuddered as you fell further limp with relaxation. Little mewls escaping your lips. The jerk reaction of your leg twitching as you murmured something under your breath. Not quite actual words but always made his lips quirk. 

“Uvo?” You exhale with a smacking of your lips, a whimper as you attempt to shift. Arms and legs trembling as you stretch out waking from your quick douse of sleep, “You’re back?” 

Your delicate lashes flutter as you languidly look about. 

“Do… You still want me?” 

Oh his heart shattered from your frail words as you rubbed at your eyes, eyes glittering from the wetness in your lash line. Your bottom lip trembling that all Uvogin can do to show you his devotion is press a chaste kiss to you. 

“Always.” He grunted before deepening his lips against yours with force, slipping his tongue inside your mouth to taste and to claim. 

You gripped his bicep, head spinning from the suddenness of his stealing your breath. Now suffocating in his warmth, his scent, and his touch as you lose yourself in the pleasure running down your spine. Emotions all over. Anger at him for leaving, for yelling. Relief he’d come back. His hands roam underneath your clothes to lay ownership over your body, a heavy groan vibrating into you as he tugged you closer. If it were even possible. He’d tie you to him if he could, keep you glued to him, be inside you to be molded as one. 

As you become more aware, your feelings of betrayal towards him coming back, you push on his pectorals. And when he doesn’t budge you push again harder, words laced with venom shooting from your mouth. 

“I want you off me.”

He looked like a kicked puppy, surprised as he pulled away. Someone so big with his bulking muscles looked like he wanted to shrivel up before he regained his senses, then attempted to entrap you in his arms.

“You don’t get to crawl into bed and kiss me after what you said. Would you have come back? Would you be this happy if Chrollo didn’t tell you about the doctor?”

“Baby.” He murmured miffed as you squirmed from his grasp, “I-”

“He found me outside, I was so cold and lost, going to just die there.” Uvogin’s face twists to something unreadable and devastating, but you continue, “He asked me what I wanted. If I would accept help from one last doctor, it would be okay if I said no. Uvo I’ve had to come to terms with all of this on my own, you’ve always been so convinced it would be okay. But don’t you understand we were out of options? We have limited time, all I wanted was to rest, to enjoy whatever I had left with you. Yet you storm off. I know it’s been taxing for you but I have tried so hard to stay alive.”

You don’t want to cry, you don’t want him to see you suffer more. You get up from the bed, seeing how his arm twinged as he held himself back from grabbing you, Uvogin was smart enough to understand times you needed autonomy to stick it in your head that you had a semblance of control.

“And I am going to do whatever it is this doctor wants to try, but if it doesn’t work you need to accept that I’m letting fate have its turn with me.” 

It felt like an eternity as you and Uvogin stared into the depths of the others eyes, watching every movement the large man could make. The apprehension in his body language as the gears turned in his head put you on edge. For he was stubborn. 

“Alright.”

Alright. He says it like it’s a defeat but offers a faint smile to follow it up. You sigh from the comfort it brought you, physically allowing your shoulders to relax from where you stood. The bed served as a thick barrier between you physically, but the expanse there mentally was like a cavern. 

“Uvo.” You sniffled, lips quivering as the necessity for him brought you to tears. But you couldn’t, wouldn’t as you remembered his words from earlier.

“C’mere baby.” 

“No.” 

He says nothing though you have ideas what he’s debating doing. 

“I can’t. Not after what you said. How willing you were to tell me to die, then walk away.”

From words spoken out of quick anger, Uvogin watched as the relationship cultivated between you two seemingly came crashing down. A thread wound so tight, pulling and pulling for months, finally snapped. And he knows he needs to patch it back up as quickly as possible, get you back into his orbit. 

He groans into his hands, pushing against his cheeks running his fingers against his skin down to his jaw, eyes moist. An incredulous look flashed across his face as his mouth opened then closed, then opened back up to speak but with no words to follow. 

A standstill, you wipe at your tears, “I think we need some time apart.”

“No. Absolutely not, you’re out your fuckin’ mind if you think I’m leaving your side.” From confusion to immediate discontent, his chest overflowing with annoyance at your stupidity thinking he’d give you space.

“But you did. Earlier.”

Uvogin had nothing to retort back for once as his brows pinched together. His thick fingers flexed as he focused on containing his growing temper he felt towards himself, the divide he put between you two. 

“And I fucked up. Got no excuse for my behavior besides I was pissed, I know I’m big and breaking shit around you isn’t the answer. Walking away won’t fix it but I had to leave before I did anything I’d regret. Couldn’t scare you further or risk hurting you. The thought of me being the reason you’re ever hurt makes me fucking ill, I’d rather break every bone in my body. I love you, and I’ll prove it to you every single day over and over if I gotta. But I’m not giving you space.”

It’s the most genuine apology that’s ever left his lips, has you warm inside and brain flitting to accept immediately. You see and hear the regret, it pulls at your heart making your stomach flutter with butterflies. He knew exactly what you needed to hear but this time around he said nothing he didn’t mean in an attempt to sway you back into his arms. He was a truthful, passionate man overall, only straying when absolutely necessary in keeping you happy with him. And he sees you perk up. Knows he’s got you.

“I’ll hold you to that.” It’s hard to hide the twinkle in your eyes, the involuntary upturn of your lips, or your reddened face because of him. How you know you’re giving in to him too easily and that you should make him work for it more. Get on his knees and beg, maybe do a few things while down there too. 

Because against better judgment you’re across the room and straddling the expanse of his large hips. Your lips desperately pressing into his uncaring for the way your lungs throbbed within you, not until you’re pulling back. A coughing fit comes over you, heavy and mucus filled, from the depths of you making you shudder. Uvogin holds you, petting your back as you hack against his chest. Burning. You felt so hot it was almost unbearable as the intake of any air was torturous for your frail body. 

He sighed into your hair, listening to your erratic pulse, “My sweetest girl. I got you. No matter what happens with this doctor, I’m here.” 

And you believe him, whether or not out of necessity. It doesn’t really matter anymore. 

You fall into a strange cycle with him the following days. Uvogin becomes your ever present, ever hovering gigantic shadow that moved precisely when you did. His intense gaze feels like a permanent fixture upon you, watching, assessing every move you made. From the food you consumed so that it was up to his standards of health, to taking over shaving your legs, to not letting a single person touch you besides himself… It brings you back to the first year you spent with him before the relationship blossomed, to how robotically he controlled your life. 

Pieces of you wanted to brush him off, punish him as exasperation boiled within you. Unable to push his hands away without a glare. His gigantic form pressing against you constantly.

But this was different, you had to believe so. He was scared to lose you. Bad enough you wandered outside with him knowing because he stormed off, almost leaving you to freeze to death. So day in and day out you're met with an onslaught of kisses and tender touches along with his over-protective barrage. In your soul you feel it though, the light at the end of the tunnel slowly approaching. Just what that light was- you weren’t certain.

-

Two weeks later on the dot does Chrollo arrive with the mysterious doctor in tow. You’re nervous sitting atop the table in the small infirmary in the Troupe’s basement. You remember the medicinal scent from the one other time you’d been down here and it makes you squirm, palms sweating as you fiddle with Uvogin’s fingers. . 

Uvogin had pulled a chair to be beside you, a large hand engulfing one of your own as the doctor carefully looked you over, taking vitals, and a few vials of blood. You’d pouted at the sight of the needles, begging Uvo for some help which only brought a wicked grin to his face. You knew he liked how hard you’d squeezed him as blood was drawn, making a face at the nauseous feeling it brought. He’s trying so hard to keep your spirits up and you daresay it’s working?

Things had been strange, more tense in some ways, Uvogin seemingly walking on eggshells around you. Scared to upset you. Overly doting if that were even possible for the clingy man who would choose to spend time with you over Troupe business. (Which took you far too long to realize how serious he was the first time he told you that.)

“I’m going to run these tests I need real quick. I need to be able to count out a few possibilities to confirm what I think our path is. My nen will speed up the process so sit tight.” The doctor, who was a short man with an overgrown beard, said offering a kind smile. 

“Thank you.” You take a sharp breath in and glance at Uvo. The door clicked close, leaving the two of you to sit in heavy silence.

You watched him slowly kiss your knuckles one at a time, expelling the unruly feelings of obsessive jealousy coursing through him. His overly possessive nature regardless of your health, hated the doctor’s hands on you. Was grounding himself as his lips dragged along your skin, “Feeling okay?” 

“Nervous. Hated describing everything I’ve dealt with, though I know he needed to hear it.” You sighed. The insurmountable effort to get out of bed each day was wearing you down, at this point you’re surprised you’re able to at all. Mornings begin with faint cries and whimpers as Uvo helps you up. Then you stay placated in the same spots, droning away at whatever is shoved in front of you. And night time was when your bones could relax and mind could have its reprieve from the constant synapses shooting aching pain through you. 

You didn’t speak much as butterflies spurred from Uvogin’s invasive touching, continuing to claim parts of you as his own as you wait. But there was a twisting past the sparks he made you feel, one dreadful and sickening. A wandering mind down alleyways of deceit telling yourself there’d be no magical cure or good news; that you’d spend your remaining time wasting away in suffering. 

Eventually the door creaked open and the doctor strode in, head stuck in a clipboard, “Alright.”

You’re sitting straight, electricity shooting through your spine. Uvo tenses next to you, his grip on your thigh tightening ever so slightly.

The diagnosis was in the air of what you’d expected. Pneumonia from the time before Bates kidnapped you never properly healed. It expanded into more. Your respiratory tract was giving up and the rest  of your body did too. It wouldn’t be long before you’d begin coughing up blood per the doctor, the statement shaking you to your core.

“I see antibiotics have not done much, which are always the first line of defense. Which I believe a more aggressive track should be taken.” 

“And what is that?” Uvogin asked in a low voice, fringing on threatening. 

“I would like to put you into a medical nen induced coma.” 

“No.” 

“Uvo.” You grab his wrist as a silent plea, “He’d know better than us on treatment.” 

Your insistence has Uvogin backing down, as in his body physically relaxing. His muscles twitch in the arm you grasp. 

“I have seen and treated 3 cases of hemoptysis or pneumonia successfully this way. And have studied cases of past colleagues too. We are in the unique situation where my nen would be the driving factor rather than what a normal hospital would use. Your body would be given complete rest, no need to fight each day to walk or eat, or even rest. It would give your white blood cells the ability to fight this intense infection. This has turned a lung infection into something chronic, this is the only route that makes sense to take.”

“How long will the coma be for?” You race to articulate your swarming thoughts. They’re all jumbled due to your lack of medical understanding and the fear seeping in. But between you and Uvo, you need to be calm so he is. Because when it came to you, any sense went out the window. 

“Two weeks. But I would be able to tell from test results if you’d need longer. Then afterwards for 3 months there’d be a strict regimen of pills.”

You take a deep breath in, “And if this doesn’t work?”

The doctor gives you a solemn look, which you understand, “Then we’d want to make you comfortable.” 

It was a scary thought. Going to sleep and not waking up one day. One that you’d rather prefer than a malicious death, like torture at the hands of Feitan. While you feel confidence in this doctor, in that you’d wake up from the nen coma, it’s what comes after that makes bile churn in your gut. 

The doctor wants to put you into the coma pronto. 

Uvogin wants to argue, you see the fire in his eyes, the desperation on his face. The silent anger vibrates in him as he wants to scoop you, his wife, up and leave. His silent pent up feelings of failing you coming to the surface. 

He holds your hand as your body goes limp. The pink glow of the doctor’s nen cocooning you inside, not allowing Uvogin to touch you. He hates it. 

The days go painfully slow. 

An hour felt like twenty. 

The first week felt like a year. 

Uvogin was more combative than normal, aggressive with his words when he used them. Abnormally quiet but everyone knew to steer clear of him. Leaving your side was an absolute no-go for the large man, needing to watch every delicate breath to prove to himself you’re still breathing. 

If someone like Uvogin was truly capable of true self reflection- he probably would have during this time. Sure, his mind occasionally filled him with doubt, if his life choices were some fateful cause of your doom. Much like his thoughts had when Bates had you, at least this time he had his eyes on you. 

When the second week finally came to an end and the doctor confirmed it was safe for you to be woken up, that your vitals showed drastic improvement, Uvogin was elated. 

How endearing it was as you whined, eyes fluttering as you struggled to wake. Limbs heavy as you reach in the air through blurry vision, attempting to claw at your face. How you mewled for him relishing in his suffocating touch, fueling his protective instincts more than ever. 

You properly wake to lips against your own, stealing your breath before moving to your jaw. Through heavy eyelids you can make out the side of Uvo’s head, then threading a hand through his wild locks. You can feel his burning lips kissing, the nipping down your neck as he sucks the delicate skin between his teeth to leave marks. A fast sigh of pain leaves your lips as a jolt inside you grounds you to your surroundings. 

“Uvo?” You croak, voice betraying you as it doesn’t sound like your own. Throat dry and hoarse, it hurts to speak so you don’t. 

He doesn’t respond to you right away, Uvogin groping and squeezing at your skin. Swirling heat envelopes your weary limbs, sweat pooling along your hairline as your core goes flush with molten liquid. Sleep still dragged on your eyelids. You could barely move your own legs from the exhaustion and traces of medical nen pricking along you.  

Your legs move, Uvogin spreading your thighs wide. The bed creaks as his weight presses on it. His body exudes searing heat. Burning you as you squirm and mewl about the heavy fog weighing down on you. Chest heavy, heart hammering so much that you hear the blood pounding in your ears as you swallow in anticipation. 

The feeling of your nightgown hiking makes you gasp. Your panties peeled off your form felt like jabs of knives down your numbly tingling skin. 

Uvogin’s thick cockhead prods at your folds, “Fuckin’ hell your soaked. Thinkin’ of me in your dreams?” He chuckled cruelly. 

You whimper as a moistness between your legs fill you with shame, his words only prodding it further. 

Mind lit in static fire, blue and orange with smoke paralyzing your brain as your hips jerk to meet his involuntarily. Body blistering from head to toe, confusing lust settled in you as you feel a pained stretch through your smoky mind. 

“Fuck you’re tight.” Uvogin grunted as he sank his cock further. 

He’s splitting you apart. You cry out, a ghastly moan as your walls spasm around the large length forcing its way in. Dazed and overwhelmed. Impossibly full before you could properly register you were even alive. That you’d been in a coma for two weeks. That now, your poor cunt was shoved full of cock and your stomach expanded as Uvogin grunted with each vicious inch he pushed further in. Fingers seized at his biceps nails drawing blood, toes curled as your legs trembled with feathery pleasure whilst all you felt was unnatural. 

You’re being pushed and pulled every which way, caught in a dangerous undercurrent that shows no reprieve to let you swim upwards. Extraordinary pleasure blossoms within you, petal by petal unfolding and its bright colors glimmering in ecstasy. Ecstasy that choked you up to where you couldn’t breathe as tears brimmed at your eyes, desperately trying to gain senses.

Uvogin began to fuck into you slow, uncaring for the lack of prep, primarily driven by his insatiable want for you. Driven by the fear over your health and his lack of control. That shoving his cock into you to feel your poor gummy walls squeeze the life out of him, settled his churning emotions. That the incessant burn of anxiety in his chest was being snuffed out, and all because the electric pleasure of being one with you brought him. 

“Uvo!” You cry so sweetly for him, all hoarse and face filled with confusion. He was your lifeline in the storm. A storm he brought upon you. One that lifted you and dropped you as his cock hit your most sensitive spots, nestling up against your cervix only to pull out and thrust in again. 

Your lust filled whimpers only grow as Uvogin manhandled your thighs further apart, resting them on his biceps as he towered over you. His thick muscles corded with each push to the hilt of his hips flush to yours. Smacking of skin filled the dry air, your pain still twisting with rapture as his name repeats off your tongue. 

He leans to capture your lips, an inhuman-like groan from the back of his throat tickles your ears. It was one of desperation, higher pitched and letting you see him with shields down. His gigantic body practically trembles upon you as he picks the pace up, pistoning his hard cock over and over, and over. Mind blurring. Squirt dripples from your abused hole as you reach your high through a giant wave of pleasure. 

“Missed you.” Is all he moans. Again. And again.

Your arms move around his neck, legs attempting to wrap around his expansive waist. You can’t imagine him being any further, needing him closer, even closer than the part of him inside you. Because as you blink furiously, registering in your post orgasm haze, about the medical nen coma. That you don’t know the state of your health or the day of the month it is, instead all you can feel is your husband’s cock burying deeper into your guts like he’d never get to again. Overstimulated and too full, Uvogin roared as he came feeling your perfect velvet walls so tight, his vision whiting out. The way the bulge in your lower tummy inflated, the way he re-hardened in seconds to empty you to slam back in. A silent scream all that escapes you.

Fucking through each other’s highs there was nothing you could have ever wanted more than him like this. Maybe you would have wanted him to wake you properly to meet with the doctor to know whether or not you’d live or die. But you’d take this heated moment as you lose your mind as he fucks your sensitive nerves and toys with your clit, murmuring loving yet intense proclamations into your ears. 

Blissed-out face. Uvogin’s eyes burning into yours. Sweat falling from your foreheads. Cries of love. Heavy breaths. Electricity swarms you two, bodies lit in flames of passion and his possession over your body, mind and soul. As he comes again, letting your tiny cunt greedily take his warm seed, your chest sores and a pathetic smile tugs at your lips. You’re babbling incoherent words. Letting him grope you and kiss, and nip and play with your most sensitive areas even as you cried for a reprieve. His come leaked from your folds, an intense river of the warm seed trickling down to the bed, leaving you oh so empty from it and the aftermath of losing his cock. You cried for him to go back inside, that you needed to feel close to him to be one with him. Your hips bucked and jerked as tears fell, pitiful pouts before he laughed.

He sucks and licks along your cunt, slurping your juices and his own seed. Playing with your sensitive and enlarged clit as tingles shoot along your core, twisting so good in your belly. Sweet salvation as you sigh in joy and blurry vision from the pleasure his mouth gave you, collapsing further into the pillows and opening your legs further to welcome him. Fingers threading into his hair to keep his head in the very spot you needed. 

A whimper bubbles from you as he kisses up your aching slit, before leisurely dragging along your sensitive bud that feels just right. Furiously working you to another climax as he suckled your clit, a finger stroking inwards of your thigh. He pads along your sopping entrance and you shudder, watching as two fingers sink into your cunt. Two of his large fingers, which one alone bigger than most cocks. Stretching you out so good as he pumped and curled to your liking, stimulating all the spots that he knew made you go dumb. Uvogin thinks he wants to watch you lose yourself to him but he knows this is a fine line he’s on already, taking advantage of you in such a vulnerable state. But he can’t help himself! You’re just so cute and he’d been so scared the last two weeks. He needed to have his cock deep in your little pussy, the one he’d been so good not to fuck whilst you were in your coma. He wonders if you’d let him fill you again as he jerked his hips against the mattress as his cock began to harden again. 

You’re grinding against him, he smirks before latching back onto your clit and listens to every vibrato of each moan. Of each cry and beg as your slick rushes from your tight cunt, ecstasy blossoming inside you once more as he coaxes orgasm after orgasm from you, him allowing your roadmap of pleasure to lead back to the thick tip of his cock prodding at your slit once more. You smile, so stupidly with a wet face and flushed skin, hardened nipples and asking for him to fill you up again. 

And he does.

Until you're leaking of him. Barely conscious and not able to even moan in pleasure. Until you're trembling and neither your arms or legs can support you anymore. Till he’s shooting blanks and still nudging himself back into you even as you drift off.

Uvogin ruts into your barely there form, pulling you to the edge of the bed so he can have a better view. His come dried and caked onto your skin. Hair a mess. Face swelled red and dried with streaked tears. He grunts as his feet garner support from the ground so he can pound back into you without worrying about the mattress holding him. He doesn’t care that you aren’t crying his name or begging for more. All he sees and cares about how you still squirt little streaks of juices from your hole and across his abdomen. How your body is so obsessed with his touch that he can still make you orgasm even as you lull in and out of sleep. Your clit is so engorged, pink and sensitive but he can’t stop playing with it, rolling it between his calloused fingers as you squirm. Or sucking on it so harshly you passed out earlier, only awoken by him tapping your cheek, pulling the back of your head up so you could watch his cock morph your insides to him as you barely understood what was going on before spasming and blanking out again. Staring into your blank eyes, mouth open in an O-shape, he tells you how much he loves you, and that everything is going to be okay. And of course you believe him, he’s your husband after all, the only man you’d let use you like a fuckdoll in your sickly state to the point your tummy inflated from his thick spurts of come.

Tomorrow, you tell yourself, you’ll come back to the reality of your situation. Tomorrow. For now you’ll bask in your husband as an escape.

-

It’s the next day, your legs and core are so sore, when you meet with the doctor. It felt like the pink blush was permanently painted along your cheeks as he checked over your vitals. Uvogin watched you smug, one hand tracing circles along the low of your back. The memories of yesterday are prevalent in the air, the thought of it makes you go flush. Uvogin knows the effects he has on you even in such a serious moment that you almost want to smack him for it.

This was it. The moment of truth. 

You're fluttering with anxious nerves, stomach churning and you’re eyeing the garbage can for the chance you puke. Thundering in your ears as your heart hammers and blood rushes. It’s like your surroundings were null as you carefully watch the doctor’s every move, listen to his every breath and word to analyze what they mean. Looking for any sign in his body language that you’re fucked, that it failed and you’re officially out of options. 

But it doesn’t come. He smiled warmly between you and Uvogin. 

“As I expected, my nen coma was a success.” 

As he expected? Had he seemed so certain two weeks ago? You didn’t think so, but apparently he believed off of past patients that you’d recover?

He continues, “Your body was able to replenish itself not having to strain itself the last two weeks. You’re out of the danger zones to where traditional medicine will be able to bring you back to around 90% of your strength. While it’ll never be completely perfect, permanent damage has been done, you’ll no longer be in chronic pain day in or day out, or worrying about coughing up blood. You can go up stairs without stopping and go for walks without needing someone’s assistance. You’ll have energy, an appetite, no longer with permanent symptoms of pneumonia, and excitement towards the future once more.” 

You immediately look to Uvogin, who for once looks pleasantly surprised. His eyes glitter as he meets your gaze, and he smiles. It’s genuine, not forced like everything had been at one point to keep your spirits high. Immediately, you fling your arms around him, tears prick at your lash line. Hugging him as tight as you can knowing you couldn’t hurt him, while his boisterous laugh is like music to your ears. 

The doctor sends Uvogin out of the room to fetch food, saying he’ll go over your medications now. 

For a second you stutter, your whole body short circuiting as you don’t want Uvo to leave. But his encouraging nod your way before he closes the door helps you relax. 

You quickly discover why the doctor wanted time alone with you.

“It’s fairly simple, these two bottles of faint coral-pink pills are for the next two months. They’re high dosages which is why they’re rather large pills, do your best to get them down. Take them with food as well.” 

The doctor grabs two other bottles, your stomach drops as you feel a change in the air. 

“Now, I’ll keep it simple. I can’t tell if you’re happy, what kind of doctor would I be if I helped you recover just to keep you with a dangerous band of criminals?” He laments, “The pale yellow pills are for the final month, they’ll cement the work of my nen and the pink pills. You should not regress for the rest of your life, they’re strong and will kill off any remaining infections or diseases. You’ll be lethargic so I recommend taking them at night.”

“What about the blue ones?” You ask, stomach feeling like it was in the pits of hell the way it violently churned within you. 

“They’ll undo mine and the pill’s work and will allow you to pass peacefully. Take them for a final way out.”

“You- How could…” 

“I’ll write down directions, yellow pills if you feel like the pink ones worked. Blue is needed if more aggressive medications are needed after the two months. At your discretion, who would argue?”

For a split second you wonder if this was a test. But you just smile at him, “I really appreciate your help. It’ll be nice to breathe normally again.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

It took all your strength to not focus too intently on the blue pills as the doctor explained to Uvogin what they meant. He was completely bought in by the ‘deceiving’ explanations, no inkling present that one of the bottles could kill you.

You don’t want to think about it, not too much. You want to think about having autonomy once more. To breathe without hacking, to walk without needing help, to eat without getting sick. 

Month one- you take the bottle of pink pills. Each day, you aren’t sure if you’re truly feeling better or if it’s a placebo. A week of getting out of bed without tears or an aching body, is when you realize recovery was possible. You begin to enjoy full meals with Uvo, seeing the delight on his face when you bake for the first time in over a year. You two laugh at the mess, how half the pastries were burnt but it’s progress as you salvage the edible parts to feed the other. Your deep, nasty cough still surfaced each day. Less and less mucus each time. You’d sleep through the nights, once again becoming the one to wake up first like a waiting puppy for its owner, how expectantly you stared down at him nudging him to wake. How for the first time you were able to initiate sex with no worries of getting sick or him hurting you, as you took his swollen lengthy cock into your mouth. Him standing over you as he lets you explore him with your tongue. He’s so heavy and you giggle, warm and needy as you suck and kiss, lick along his thick veins to the point he can’t handle your teasing. You cry as he fucks your face but they’re good tears, and he watches as you swallow and then open your mouth to show him. Uvogin never leaves your side but for once you feel joy towards it, not frustration. 

Month two- you still take the pink pills and the improvement is astronomical. You giggle like a maniac as you skip about the fluttering grass outside the Troupe’s Base. Uvo watches you spin about before falling to the ground in exhaustion, he smiles as you bask in the sun. You’re breathing heavily but no coughing fits come. You’re bright red and clearly tired but you can still get up to keep going. He’s relaxing under a tree and you’re running around like your life depended on it, he thinks you’re just so damn cute. This is the month you return to more hobbies, become more talkative and want to watch more shows or finally give him back snarky remarks. Uvogin almost dies from the elation, the lightness of his chest at how life returned to you, how you were you. Not the husk of a person stolen away because of disease, you’re happy. Right? 

It’s now month three- you stare between the two bottles. ‘Take the blue pills for a way out.’ The doctor's words reverberate, you’d ignored them for the first two months not wanting to worry about it. Not wanting to get in your head before making a decision. 

You sit in the main room of the Troupe’s Base, Chrollo had called a last minute meeting the night before so Uvogin had to cart you out of bed, ruining a rather good dream. You’re staring at the medications on the counter, then eyes flickering to the clock. Today was the first day you needed to make your choice, the one you’d avoided for so long. 

Sickness numbed your mind at times, while at others allowed you to see things for what they really were. You think. You’d been ready to die, to be released from chronic neverending pain, but now having life back changed your mind. Little things you’d always taken more granted were now things you would never want to lose again. Maybe you’d lost yourself a long time ago, maybe you were always a horrible person to love Uvogin, but as you recount all these years with him you don’t want to lose him. Or the way he loved you. The doubt you’d had towards him after Bates was finally washing away, you walled all the incessant ringing you’d have in your ears off. No more were you susceptible to the common sense you had at the start of your captivity to always hang onto the truth about him. You walled it all off, brick by brick in your head. 

Maybe a part of you wants him to suffer. Wondering how he’d react when you suddenly fell sick again and passed, would he be ruined? Would he move on? You figured he’d do something dumb, find a way to get himself killed more likely. So you walled those feelings off too. 

“Hey.” 

“Hi.” You smile as Uvo walks out from one of the halls. You mewl into his large hand as he cups the side of your head before moving so you could lean back into him. He’s so large over you that when you lean back on the side of your chair that you only reach up to his thighs. 

You crane your neck to look up, “Everything okay?”

“Yep. Nothin’ for you to worry about.” He looks at the bottles on the table, “So, what ones you thinking? Can you mix them depending on how you feel each day?”

“Uh, don’t know about that, doubt it? I’ve been trying to recount everything to make a decision. Because I mean… I can’t complain, I feel good.” 

“Right.” Uvogin held a hand for you to take, then he grabbed your waist to help you up, “Up to you then, babe.”

The feeling of his thumb circling against your clothed side and the suddenness of standing makes your head spin. In a moment of striking clarity you reach to grab one of the bottles, certain in your choice.

“Yeah?” 

“Mhmm.” You grin up at him, squeezing his hand as you lace your fingers with his. 

The bottle of yellow pills rattles in your hand as you two make your way to his room. The blue pills sit forgotten, almost screaming out for you to change your mind, to think things through again. That you needed to at least leave cracks in the wall you created to protect yourself, just in case. But you didn’t. You coated it in shiny protective layers of something in your mind, causing your chest to surge in feelings of love and all things gooey and over the top. Just stars left shining in your eyes as you look at him. 

The month of taking the yellow pills passed, they made you lethargic like the doctor said they would, causing you to get mass amounts of sleep. But he was right, they made you feel good as new. 

You sit cross legged in the townhome, leafing through pages of your book as Uvogin shuffles around in the kitchen. He’d insisted that he’d make dinner tonight, which you told him takeout would be just as satisfactory (and probably better anyways). 

After multiple interventions on your part you two finally sit connected at the hip as your weekly show plays, food in hand. When Uvo finishes he tucks an arm around your waist pulling you closer, pressing a kiss to your hair. A heaviness in your chest suddenly becomes apparent, each time you swallow the food seeming dry and tasteless. 

“Uvo?”

He sensed the tension in your small body immediately, but didn’t say anything as he knew you were still adjusting. While physically you could handle a lot from long walks or eating actual food, mentally you were still catching up with the changes. 

“What’s up?”

“Can I tell you something?” You ask meekly. Your fingers feel sweaty, you have to set the food down on the coffee table immediately. A storm rages within you. One side telling you to spill, the other telling you to let this be a secret you die with.

“Anything.” 

“The- You remember the blue pills I could have taken instead of the yellow ones?” More screaming within you to stop. Like hands were physically trying to drag your voice back down, that this would only anger him. 

“I do.” 

You can’t bring yourself to look at him, focusing on your hands in your lap. You’re more aware of his hulking presence holding you to him than before. You’re more aware of his steady heartbeat and breaths as you wait for them to speed up, to show his anger.

“You can’t get mad.”

“Mad ‘bout what? You end up taking any?” 

Your heart is hammering in your ribs, like it’d burst out ripping you and all your biggest fears into the open. It’s giving you away, you know it. The room felt like it was closing in, suffocating you until you took a deep breath in. No lies. You were given a new chance at life and you would not keep this from him. Couldn’t. It was best it came from you rather than someone else somehow down the road. 

“They would have actually killed me.” 

Silence. 

“Uvo?”

“Yeah?”

He’s not reacting how you thought he would. He starts to fucking laugh and you’re staring at him like a deer in headlights. It makes feelings of annoyance bubble in your chest, anger as your nose flares and your pupils dilate. 

“Why… Are you laughing? It’s not funny.”

“Course it’s not, babe, but I already knew.” He shrugged. 

“How?”

“Shalnark. Guess he got curious what was in them after you said you wouldn’t be taking them. I said he could have ‘em to do whatever that tech freak does.” 

“I don’t understand.”

“Came to me and told me they would have regressed your pneumonia and caused you to pass in your sleep eventually. So I assumed you were aware of that, the doctor probably lied to me, and you made the choice to live. Of course I had to wonder what if you didn’t know and it was all luck you didn’t take them, now I know it wasn’t.”

“That’s why you didn’t say anything?”

“Yep, figured if you didn’t know you’d have flipped shit.”

“Why are you acting so calm? You’re freaking me out.”

Uvogin forced you to look up at him. He pulled you in for a quick kiss, “Because you chose me. You had all that time to think about it so you must have known for certain you wanted to be with me.” He grinned deviously, “Course I’m a little irked but, I do deserve some shit still for kidnapping you. I’d say it all worked out though, huh?” 

You playfully smacked his chest, unable to hide your grin, “You know I looked at the blue pills as a way out if the medical coma and pink pills didn’t work. That if I was back in pain, I couldn’t believe it almost, I was ready to suffer again. Not once did I want to use them because I wanted to be away from you. Sure I wondered if you deserved to suffer for the shit you do, but I love you. I wanted help from that doctor because I want more time with you, I could have said no to Chrollo three months ago. So I knew what my choice was from the start. You’re all I wanted those months with Bates, I had time to think, unravel my feelings yet you’re it for me Uvo. Guess you’ll get your karma in another way.”

“So fucking cute, wife.” His lips crushed onto yours again, his tongue shoving inside claiming you. He pulled you to straddle his lap before he pulled away to rest his forehead against yours, “You had me believing in that stupid karma shit, you know that? Glad you’re finally passed me being a mass murderer and all that.”

“Don’t say it like that!” You groan, shame prickling the back of your neck making you go warm. The wall is still strong in your mind, keeping you happy, keeping you from fully feeling that shame that should have made you go comatose. Instead it allowed you to kiss him with all your might, tugging at the shirt he wore. A kiss turned to desperate chaos as teeth gnashed and lips fought for dominance, saliva shared and dripping as lewd moans began to fill the air. Carnal touches. Salacious grunts. Swirling hot sex filled air controlled you two as clothes thrown discarded and forgotten, unneeded. 

You’d made your decision. How much of it was really your own, was left up for discussion. You’d never know how much of this you really wanted, or if you’d fallen in love out of necessity for survival. Or if Uvogin really was who you were meant to be with. But all you knew as Uvogin forced his swollen cock passed your tight unprepped walls, you’d never want anything more than this man as you cried. You who practically passed out as he breached your aching cunt and to the hilt of your cervix, outlining your tummy and pushing to stretch you even more as he yelled out for you. This man who loved you furiously and would destroy the whole world for you if you asked. And that- wasn’t that the grandest declaration of one’s feelings you could receive? 

Right? 

authors note on an alternate ending— i view it as if reader were to die than this would head towards canon where uvogin dies by kurapika’s hand and he’s all content because he gets to see you again :))

[lam-ila]

I Care About You || Fernando Alonso

Summary: An unfortunate crash prompts Fernando to defend you and confess his feelings.

Word Count: 1,513

Warnings: slight descriptions of a crash

please let me know if you find more that i should add

F1 Masterlist

a/n: this is gender neutral. hope you enjoy this! feedback is appreciated

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Just like any other F1 driver, you hated crashes. They were always inevitable, you knew that, every driver knew that, but you absolutely hated them, especially when you were involved in them.

Early on in the first few laps of the Monaco Grand Prix, you were crashed into. The driver behind you tried to overtake you at an extremely narrow part of the track and ended up crashing into the side of your car.

“No, no, no, no, no!” you yelled into the radio as you were crashed into, resulting in a red flag. As you slowed to a stop, TV screens at viewers’ homes displayed “Are you ******* kidding me?”

“Not your fault. Not your fault at all,” your race engineer calmly told you. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, but I’m pretty sure my race is over.” You threw your head back as you responded, annoyed at the circumstances you found yourself in.

You climbed out of your car and assessed the damage, realizing that you were right, your race was over. You glanced over to the car that crashed into yours, noting that it had a similar amount of damage as yours and also wouldn’t be able to continue racing. You somehow felt better knowing that you weren’t the only driver to DNF, only feeling a small amount of guilt upon taking pleasure in someone else’s pain, pain that wouldn’t have happened if the driver didn’t try to overtake you.

Once you were off the track, you angrily ripped off your helmet and looked back at the crash, making eye contact with the driver who crashed into you. You quickly turned your head away, not wanting any prolonged eye contact to result in a conversation with the driver, and started to make your way to your team’s hospitality.

After changing out of your racing suit and meeting with the press, you sat down on a couch in your team’s hospitality and opened your phone, only to see the blame of crash being placed onto you. You furrowed your brow upon reading the seemingly endless posts, comments, and headlines blaming you for the crash. Deciding that you read enough, you placed your phone face down on the table in front of you and heavily exhaled in attempt to calm yourself down. You were running on adrenaline since the crash and looking at your phone wasn’t going to help bring your heart rate down.

You placed your elbows on your knees and leaned forward, so that your head was in your hands. You sat in that position for minutes, deep in thought. This was a just a misunderstanding, right? This wasn’t actually your fault, right? You took a deep breath as you shifted your body weight and took support from the back of the couch. You widened your eyes and you realized that you knew for a fact that the crash wasn’t your fault. Not only did your race engineer tell you so, but you also did nothing out of the ordinary while driving on the track. After all, it was the other driver who crashed into you because of a mistake they made, not the other way around.

Your gaze shifted to your phone as you contemplated opening it again to see what else people were saying. Deciding against it, you sighed, rubbed your hand against the top of your head, and stood up, making your way to your team’s garage. You needed a distraction and besides, it would probably look like the crash was your fault if you weren’t seen for the rest of the race.

Once the race ended, you went on your phone again, wanting to see what the overall narrative of the race was and if it was still highly focused on your crash. A video of Fernando, one of the drivers you were good friends with, kept showing up on your Instagram feed and on the fifth time that it showed up, you decided to click on it.

“I don’t think so,” Fernando started, looking a little off screen to look at the interviewer. “The driver behind them to overtake when they shouldn’t have. The track is too narrow to overtake there and this crash just proved that to be correct.” Fernando listened to the interviewer asking a clarifying question before continuing. “No, Y/N L/N is not at fault for this crash.”

You initially smiled and filled with a feeling of warmth. That was your friend, your Fernando, defending you. But then you realized, Fernando was defending you. As much as you appreciated it, you wanted to take care of everything with just you and your team. You didn’t like the way that it all looked: veteran Fernando Alonso defending a driver who is being blamed for a crash.

You marched out of the garage and entered the big post-race crowd of drivers, staff, interviewers, and friends and family of drivers, determined to confront Fernando. You spotted him within the crowd and sped up to reach him before he disappeared in the crowd again.

“I could have handled that myself, you know,” you declared once you caught up to Fernando, still navigating through the crowd.

“You’d rather have me just stand there and let the blame be placed onto you?” he challenged, slowing his pace to hear you out.

“Yes!” you exclaimed while raising your voice a little, turning a few of the heads around you. “That was not your battle to fight.”

“I didn’t want you to have to fight it on your own," Fernando reasoned, one step ahead of you as you two navigated your way through the crowd.

“Why? You’ve let other drivers figure this type of thing out on their own.”

He quickened his pace, trying to lose you through the chaos of the surrounding crowd.

“Fernando!” you sternly yelled his name, similar to a parent scolding their child and like a child being scolded, he froze and stopped in his tracks. “Please, I just want to understand,” you softly explained, meeting his eyes with a sincere look. He stayed silent, taking a moment to study your features: wide eyes, raised eyebrows, and lips slightly parted. Fernando’s eyes darted around, taking in the amount of people around you.

“Let’s go somewhere more private,” he stated, gently grabbing you by the hand, pulling you out and away from the crowd. You followed Fernando and stumbled over to a less crowded area of the paddock. Once you were standing face to face, you noticed that the area was only used as a means to get from one place to another.

“This private enough for you?” you teased as one side of your lips curled up into a smile. Fernando didn’t verbally respond, but rather nervously nodded with his head slightly tilted down as to not meet your gaze. Your smile fell as you watched a nervous Fernando, something you rarely saw unless something was very much wrong. “Nando?” You used his nickname, hoping it would calm his nerves. “What’s wrong?”

He shifted his head to meet your gaze, then looked back at the ground. Deciding you had enough, you cupped your hand around his cheek and gently moved his head so he would look at you.

“Fernando?” You tried to get him to respond again.

“Hi,” he finally said.

“Hi,” you softly laughed. “You wanna tell me what’s going on?”

He sighed and straightened his body, removing your hand from his cheek in the process.

“You want to understand, yes?” You nodded enthusiastically, resulting in Fernando chuckling at your silent answer. “Okay, well you are right that I wouldn’t defend other drivers.”

“Then why-”

“You going to let me finish?” Fernando cut you off before laughing once again, this time at you miming zipping your lips together. “I care about you and before you start again, I know what you’re going to say: you care about me because that’s what friends do, they care about each other. But I care about you more than the way friends do, mi amor.”

“Mi amor?” you repeated, raising your eyebrows.

“Eh, too much?” he asked, nervously running his hand through his hair.

“No, I like it.” Fernando breathed a breath of relief at those four words. “It’s a good thing I care about you more than the way friends do too.”

“Yes,” he smiled brighter than you’ve ever seen him smile. “it’s very good.”

Fernando leaned forward and angled his head to kiss you, but you stopped him by lightly placing your hand on his lips. He raised his eyebrows and slightly tilted his head as if saying ‘why’d you do that?’

“I think we sound find somewhere more private for that,” you whispered with a shy smile on your face, not wanting anyone else, or any cameras, to partake in the moment.

Fernando smiled, kissed your hand that was against his lips, then took that hand and held it in his. Taking a few steps, he began to guide you to a much more private location, just as he did before, so he could continue without any worries.

——————————

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[olsenmyolsen]

This Is Me Trying - One - (A Y/N Parker Spider-Woman X Kate Bishop Story)

masterlist

Summary: The Winter semester is challenging as you fall behind on exams and essays all while an old threat emerges.

Word Count: 3.3K

Content: College stress, cutie Kate Bishop

You, Y/N Parker, loved Christmas time.

You loved how it changed the city from a smelly concrete jungle into a smelly concrete jungle but with snow!

Lights went up with trees covered in decorations. Lattes got better, and so did the cookies.

The air got colder, and sometimes the people got warmer. Whether it was buying things for strangers or for a lifelong friend. Random acts of kindness increased, but on the flip side, so did the rate of crime.

Plus, swinging in the cold was awful, but with some insulation in the suit, it helped.

All of this to say you still loved this time of the year.

"You know, since you love it so much, how about you let me go? You know, like you said, kindness of strangers and all that!"

You looked at the guy webbed to a pole who just mugged a woman coming home from work and tilted your head.

"You know what you're right. Tis the season!" The man nodded as you took a few steps closer. "However, on second thought!" The man's eyes widened before you webbed his mouth shut.

"Marv, how many times are we gonna do this, buddy?" You patted the man's head as the sirens were approaching.

"Happy Holidays!" You yelled as you swung up to the nearby rooftop, looking for the woman whose purse was in your hand.

As you stay perched on the corner, your phone starts to ring. It was Peter—your best friend and brother. You debated whether to answer it or not, but eventually, you gave in and pressed the side of your mask.

"Hey man, what's up?"

"Not much... I know it's late, but I- I was just wondering if you started on Dr. Ohnn's paper yet? I'm completely lost. H-He knows we're sophomores, right?!"

You chuckled and sighed.

You haven't started on the paper yet.

"Sorry, Pete. I've been busy..." You heard Peter let out a disappointed sigh.

"Y/N... you're out, aren't you?" You felt bad. For the last couple of weeks, Peters has been asking you to take it easy with your after-school duties due to the number of exams these previous few weeks have had and, as mentioned before, the crime rate, but you haven't. If anything, you tacked on more. "Y/N, you know how dangerous I still think this is."

You rolled your eyes. "Yes, Peter, I know, but-" Before you could finish, you saw a person jump from one rooftop to another two blocks down from you. "Hey Pete, I gotta go..."

"Wait Y/N... Y/N!"

The line went dead as you tapped the side of your mask and took off, swinging purse in hand to the stranger on the rooftop.

As you front-flipped from your webbed, you laughed. "Well, if it isn't the purple bird!" You said when you got up from your landing pose, scaring the crap out of the archer. He jumped and drew his bow on you before realizing who it was.

With an exaggerated groan, he withdrew his weapon.

"What do you want, Spider!?" He sounded annoyed. You put your hands over your heart. Purse still in hand. "Ouch! I just wanted to check up on the man who destroyed 30 Rock last year."

Clint Barton rolled his eyes.

"It was a tree and a skating rink. Get over it." You raised your hand and mocked the archer as you stepped onto the roof's ledge.

"Where's the youngster?" You asked switching topics. Clint raised an eyebrow. "What are you spying on me now?" You put your hands up. "As if! Just curious. Making conversation. It's not my fault you two happen to fall into my patrol area."

Clint looked at you. "Your patrol area?" You nodded. "It's called New York. Ever heard of it?" Clint rolled his eyes again. "You can be a pain in the ass sometimes, you know that."

"I've been told."

"By friends?" You laughed. "No by enemies. Wait..? Why did you hear something?"

Clint cracked a smile. "Maybe." He hadn't, but he enjoyed this back-and-forth you two played. Like his protege, it was nice to have someone around who reminded him of the heroes of the past. People that brought hope for the future.

"So is that purse yours or?" Clint looked up from his binoculars at you. "No. It's not my color." When Clint didn't laugh, you continued. "Lady got mugged, and I don't know where to find her."

Clint looked from the purse to you and did it two more times. "What?" You asked when no words were spoken. Clint huffed. "You have her purse. It probably has her ID." You tilted your head before your eyes got wide. "Oh! Her address!"

Clint nodded yes and grumbled about you before looking into his binoculars again.

"Thanks, bird man!" You said as you looked at the address. It wasn't far. "Same time tomorrow?" You asked as you twhiped away.

Clint sent you a thumbs-up even though he wasn't paying attention. But you didn't know that. You saw a thumbs up and smiled.

You were getting through to the old man.

As you twhiped to the woman's place to return her purse, a bright-eyed Kate Bishop saw you.

"It's the Spider!" She very awkwardly whispered to no one else before running to the building; she had no idea you had just left from.

And when she got to the top: "Clint!" She shouted, making the archer jump before realizing who it was. "What!?" He said, looking at her as she smiled with excitement. "The spider! I just saw her!" He nodded like a dad would. "And?" He said. "And! And! And isn't that cool!" Clint shrugged. "I guess. She was here. She actually asked about you." Clint held in a smile.

It was a not-so-secret that Kate had a slight crush/admiration for the web-slinging hero.

"And!?" Kate took the binoculars from Clint and awaited his answer. "And... that was it. Nothing else. She joked around. I rolled my eyes. That was it."

Kate was going to press for my information, but Clint was useless when it came to details so mundane.

"Ugh. Fine. Here." Kate tried to hand the binoculars back, but Clint shook his head. "Look and tell me what you see." Kate looked through them and into the window of a known wheelman. "Tracksuits." She said, making Clint nod.

"See the guy with the awful chops?" Kate shifted her focus to a guy with bad facial hair. "Yeah."

"Look past him on the wall." Kate did just that and smiled. "I thought people only drew on blueprints in the movies?!"

"Our guys must watch a lot of movies," Clint said as he chuckled.

Kate put the binoculars down and looked at Clint. "After last year, do you still think Kingpin and these guys are connected? I mean..." Kate made a gesture that said, "really, these guys??" while pointing in the direction of the Tracksuits.

Clint shrugged. "I think it's best to believe they're connected than to not. Plus.. drugs and money still need to be run for guys like Kingpin. Any disposable person that's easy to pay is like Christmas to these guys."

Kate thought about it and nodded as she looked through the binoculars again. "Remember when we destroyed 30 rock."

Clint groans and closes his eyes. "It was a tree and an ice rink. Not the whole city!"

While Kate was busy trying to figure out what annoyed Clint and what Kingpin was planning next, you were busy climbing into your dorm through the window.

You tore your mask off as your feet landed on the floor. You ran your covered hand through your freshly shortened hair and took a deep breath before frowning. You sniffed the air before lifting your suit close to your nose. "Ah, man.."

The city really got to it tonight.

You tossed your mask into the hamper in your closet as you started wrangling out of your suit. You've been meaning to make adjustments to your suit since your arm muscle has only grown, but you hadn't, which left it a bit tight to get out of sometimes.

Lucky for you, you never had people drop by unannounced, so you could always take your time-

"Y/N is that you- OH MY GOD!"

You turned towards the voice of your brother as the top half of your suit fell, showing off you in your black sports bra and toned abdomen.

"Peter!" You yelled as he threw his hands over his eyes. "I didn't know. I'm sorry!" He shouted as he went to run out the door but hit your wall instead, causing him to fall to the floor, knocked out.

An hour later, as you moved your clothes from the wash to the dryer, Peter woke up. And after scolding him about not knocking, you and him got to work on Dr. Ohnn's paper.

But with your exhausted brain and body. Plus Peter's... mild concussion, you two didn't get far. So, just as you were about to suggest calling it for the night, your roommate came home.

Where she was or who she was with was always a mystery to you.

"Hey, losers!" Michelle-Jones, aka MJ, greeted you and Peter as she ran to grab the TV remote sitting on the table. She clicked it on and found the local news channel. "MJ, what are you-" She held up a finger and shushed your brother. "Look!" She pointed to the screen as a reporter was standing in front of a run-down apartment building that was on fire. "It's the fifth one this month!" MJ stated. "Everything thinks I'm crazy, but I know insurance fraud when I see it."

You and Peter weren't sure how to continue.

"Okay..." You started. "What's your point?" You questioned, hoping your roommate and friend was going somewhere with this. "Obviously, someone is doing something very illegal."

"Okay..." Peter said. "What can we do about it?"

"We can't do anything about it. But someone here can." MJ started motioning her head towards you, making you sigh. "MJ. I've told you multiple times. The pictures were a summer thing. I don't take their pictures anymore!" MJ rolled her eyes. Clearly not believing you. "Whatever you say..." She narrowed her eyes at you. "Spider!"

Before you could argue back, MJ got up and went to the fridge before taking a box of pizza to her room. "I'm gonna crash. Night."

"I brought that pizza..." Peter quietly said as you collapsed onto the couch. "You were gonna give it to her anyways." You turn your head to Peter. "Was not!" He defends, but you see through him. "You've had a crush on her for the last year, so please let's be honest here."

Peter closed his mouth and then said: "You're the one not being honest with her."

"Dude."

"Sorry," Peter mumbled. "It's just she's going to find out on her own if you don't tell her." He whispered. You nodded. "I know. I know. But you and I both know that the fewer people that know, the less I have to worry about. The less people get hurt."

Peter wore a sad smile on his face. "You're right. I.. I just hate lying to her."

You looked at Peter as he brought his knees close to his chest on the other end of the couch. "I'm sorry, Pete." He nodded. He knew it was easier for you to do this if the less people knew about your other life, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could lie to MJ.

The following morning, after Peter returned to his dorm, you woke up late.

Apparently, in your sleepy daze, you hit 730 into your calculator app and not your alarm clock application. On top of that, you forgot to charge your phone, so as you panicked to get ready for the day, you quickly put in the cable to charge.

You grabbed your closest pair of jeans and threw on your school sweater, all while grabbing the textbooks scattered on your desk.

You ran into the kitchen and grabbed your last pair of pop tarts before heading to the door and slipping on your vans. You zipped up your bag and bolted out the door.

However, you immediately reentered your dorm, ran into your room, snatching your glasses and phone, now on 16%.

_

The lecture hall was full by the time you entered. The booming of the door attracted the attention of everyone.

Your brother included. Your eyes found his, and he gave you a weak smile as you sat at the first seat you could find.

When you pulled out your textbook and looked up, you saw Dr. Connors sigh before he continued speaking. "As I was saying. Yes, just because the holidays are upon us doesn't mean we won't have our test on Friday. I want something fun to grade over the break, people." He gave an awkward chuckle that few students, including you, gave back. "Oh, and don't forget. Your papers on physics are still due by the end of the school year. If you've forgotten... well, there's a reason I'm tenured, and this class lasts all year." He smiled and proceeded to dismiss everybody.

Everybody but you.

"Y/N Parker. A moment."

You knew it was coming, but you kept your head up high. You look to Peter, and he nods. He'd see you after class.

"Dr. Connors, look, I'm sorry about being late-"

"Late?" He cut you off. "You missed the whole dang class." You sighed and adjusted the bag around your shoulder. "Look..." Dr. Connors started. "You're a bright student. I've seen it firsthand, but lately... it's like you're not even here. Your grades have been steadily declining. You always appear exhausted."

You nodded. "I'm trying. I wanna be here!"

"Then be here." He said before he sighed. "You still haven't told me what your physics paper is on."

You perked up at that. "I plan on doing it about fusion and Dr. Otto Octavius."

Dr. Connors sighs. "Well, planning is not a major at this university." He walks past you and goes to the giant board in the middle of the room. He then stops. "Octavius is a friend of mine. Better do your research, Parker." You nod. "I'd really hate to see you fail."

"I don't want to, sir." You say, making Connors look at you with a sad smile on his face. "I can pass along your information to Octavius. Whether he contacts you or not is up to him. After that..." He looks at you. "It's up to you, Parker."

When you exited the lecture hall, you found Peter talking to your mutual friend Ned. The closer you got, the more you saw Peter panic and tell Ned to "shut up."

"What's going on?" Peter shook his head as if nothing was wrong. You looked to Ned, who sheepishly looked away. "Ned." You drug his name out.

Ned took one look at you and broke. "I think I might know about the fires around the city!" He smiled and looked excited. It paid to have Ned be the guy in the chair.

You looked at Peter. "You didn't want him to tell me?" Peter sighed. "Y/N, you have so much going on already we don't need you." He gestures with his hand as if he was shooting a web. "Right now. Besides, you haven't even started on your essay, and you just got in trouble with Connors!"

Before you could defend your lack of action, you get interrupted.

"Hey guys!"

Immediately, your stress melted away as you looked down at Kate Bishop. Captain of the Archery Team. Your friend and study partner.

Oh, and your crush.

Katherine Elizabeth Bishop.

"Hey Kate!" You said a little too excitedly, something that everyone caught on to. Thankfully, they chose not to make a big deal out of it. "Hey, Y/N." She looked at you and smiled.

There goes the butterflies.

"So what are you three amigos talking about?" She bounced on her heels as she looked away from you and to the other two. "Oh, nothing!" Peter said. "I don't think you're allowed to say that?" Ned added with a confused face.

"Doesn't sound like nothing," Kate said, making Peter glance at you. "Sounds like Y/N is getting in trouble with Connors." She replied as she turned to you with a teasing smile. "Let me guess..." She made a thinking face. "Too busy studying for our History test?"

History test!! Oh crap, that is Friday!

"Okay, based on the look I just gained, you forgot." You nodded. Kate made a hmm noise but kept her head towards you as she thought.

"Shit," Ned spoke up. "Peter, we gotta go, or we'll be late!" Peter looked at his watch and came to the same conclusion. "Gotta go! See you, Y/N! Bye, Kate!" Peter and Ned took off running down the hall and out the doors before they sprinted across the courtyard.

"What class do they have?" Kate asked.

"Robotics."

"Sounds about right." She said. "We should probably get going." Kate smiled and gestured her head in the general direction of your History class with Kate. "Don't worry about the test," Kate said as you two walked side by side. "You always do just fine." You shrugged her compliment off.

Kate noticed. "But I was thinking if you want..." You looked at Kate and noticed her fingers interlocking with one another. "Maybe you could come to my dorm to study some more. Besides, I still need help on the laws and how they changed once the Sokovian Accords were ratified."

You and Kate had always hung out in mutual gatherings and settings. You two were good friends, but you had never been to her dorm.

On top of that. Alone.

You suddenly felt very warm and wary of your every move.

"That sounds great!" You managed to say. "When were you thinking?"

Kate thought. If it were up to her, you'd come over tonight, but Kate wasn't sure what her roommate Cassie was doing. Plus, she and Clint had a hot new lead to follow up on. "Ummm, is it cool if I text you?"

You nodded. "Sounds great." You smiled widely and pushed the door to your History class open. Letting Kate walk in first. You and Kate walked to your seats and sat beside one another.

"Shit." You heard Kate mumble when she opened her bag. "You okay?" You asked. "Uh yeah.." She bit her lip. A habit you noticed that she only got when she was embarrassed. "What's wrong?" You asked when you tore your eyes away from her chewed-on pink lips.

Kate sighed when her lips parted. "I forgot my textbook. I thought I packed after Clint- Clint-on Clinton and I got back from Archery, but I guess I didn't." Kate didn't look your way.

She was now warm and aware of every move she made.

"Hey, I surprisingly remembered mine." You pulled yours out. "We can share." You moved it in between the two of you. "Really?" She charmingly lifted her eyebrows. "Really." You said.

Kate let out a little cheer and wrapped an arm around you. "You're a lifesaver!"

If only she knew.

Kate didn't remove her arm from around you as quick as she usually would have; instead, you could feel her hand slide up your muscles to your shoulder.

Kate had been noticing your muscle growth as of late but didn't know where it came from...

Eventually, Kate removed her touch from you.

Yet you still felt her.

"It's no big deal." You said about sharing the textbook. But you and Kate both knew that based on your actions recently, you remembering to bring your book or not falling asleep in class was a miracle.

This was Kate's first time forgetting a book, and she could sense Clint's disappointed sigh.

Kate smiled as she watched your fingers turn the corners of the page in the textbook. Her eyes lifted to your fingers, to your sweater, and up to your face. She watched your side profile as you silently read a paragraph to yourself. She only stopped when you looked her way and hid a smile when you pushed up your glasses. "What's up?" You quietly asked.

"Do you want to come to my archery practice tomorrow?" Kate whispered back.

Kate wasn't sure what you had going on in your life. You and her were close but not close, like with Peter, Ned, and MJ. So she never pushed.

Plus, she liked you and didn't want to ruin what you two might have.

But when you said, "Yeah! That sounds awesome!" Like a dork, Kate smiled.

dividers by @/benkeibear

[patito-oward]

First Night

masterlist

WC: 1.6k

Summary: YN and Pato spend their first night together

Previous Parts: I

me posting?? who is she. i hope you all love please repost if you do 🤍🤍

~

Pato had arrived at her house the next night to take her out once again. They went on a series of 6 dates in two weeks, and had become quite enamored with each other in that time. YN was hesitant at first, trying to keep her guard up while she waited for the other shoe to drop, but Pato had wormed his way in. It was hard to not let her walls down and let him in when he was so incredibly sweet.

Their second date Pato picked her up in a rented Toyota Corolla which made YN giggle when she saw it. “You actually rented a car to pick me up in?”

“I’m on my third strike and I couldn't risk it.”

Pato knew when he first saw her that she was special, but never expected to fall as hard and as fast as he had. He had come to expect that he was not seen as “boyfriend material” for most women. He knows his schedule and frequent travel doesn’t scream commitment. He had gotten used to a few dates, maybe a couple hookups, and not much more. He tried to convince himself he was okay with that. That the one night stands were fun and he needed to focus on his career anyways, and he was fulfilled by it. It worked– sometimes.

It worked until he’d watch a cheesy romance movie and think about how much he wanted someone to be by his side, or until he had a kid come up so him at a race, a gap in their front teeth and incredibly excited to meet him, and he realized how much he wanted a family of his own.

So he cut off the hookups, because after each one he would be left with this lasting feeling of emptiness, and he’d stopped going on dates for the most part, accepting that his career has prevented him from what he really wanted. If it hadn’t been for Elba’s incessant nagging, he wouldn’t have gone on the date with YN. He’s never been more thankful to have such an annoying older sister.

He invited YN over so he could cook dinner for her, and he was suddenly very nervous about how the night would go. He had tried to plan the perfect night, decorating his table with a large vase of red roses and candles, but as she got closer to arriving he started to doubt himself and wonder if it was too much. He doesn’t want a repeat of their first date where she was clearly overwhelmed.

Before he could think too much about it or change anything, his doorbell rang, and he decided to just try and make the best of the night. The second he opened the door he felt a lot better, she had that effect on him, just seeing her seemed to lower his heart rate and calm him down. She looked absolutely gorgeous in a pair of dark jeans and a cropped sweater.

“Hi!” She greeted him with the sweetest smile and he realized how utterly gone he was for her.

“Hi, you look beautiful.” He kissed the corner of her mouth, a quick gesture but even that made his stomach flip, and moved aside so she could come in.

She had seen his apartment before, but only briefly when he realized he left his phone after he picked her up, and invited her inside. He could tell she was really taking in the place now, the night time made it seem different, softer, the few lights he had on cast a soft glow through the place.

The timer on his phone went off and he headed towards the oven to take out dinner. He made pasta for the night, and it was in the oven to bake the cheese he topped it with. It was when they reached the kitchen that she took note of the dining table.

“Is it too much? I’m sorry if it is; I just wanted tonight to go perfect and I’ve messed it up already.” He started apologizing without her saying anything.

“It’s gorgeous. I can't believe you set this all up and thought I wouldn’t like it.” YN assures him, and kisses him hard trying to show him all of her gratitude.

“I’m glad you like it.”

Dinner is easy, like most things have become between them. YN has never felt so comfortable with someone, and wants to tell him everything. Pato already wants YN to know the deepest parts of him, he wants to learn her inside and out and vice versa.

The thing they’ve taken to talking to most is their families, and they’ve learned so much about each other through that. They both have one sibiling, their best friend, and they’re both extremely close to their families. In a lot of ways YN reminds him of Elba, when she talks about her younger sister he can tell how much he cares for her. She tells him about how she used to watch her sister frequently while her mom worked two jobs to support them. In a sense he feels like he’s met her sister and mother, the way she describes them he can tell there’s so much love between them.

They’ve completely gone through the getting to know you stage, conversations now filled with stories and deep conversations about fears and the future.

After dinner they settle onto the couch, and are scrolling for something to watch. Pato has a large, comfy sectional, but YN has chosen to curl up right against him. It sends a warmth through him, he can smell the mix of her strawberry shampoo and vanilla perfume, and decides it is his new favorite smell. He wraps his arm around her and she leans on his shoulder.

They scroll through netflix and find a baking show to spend the rest of the night watching. It was less about what they were watching for both of them, and more about just being together; however, they both got quite into the show, enjoying watching the competition and judging the bakers themselves.

As the night went on, YN grew pretty drowsy on the couch, and after an episode ended announced, “I should probably head home soon.”

When she sat up, Pato immediately missed the weight of her against him. “Ok, I guess it is getting pretty late.”

She kissed him then, “Thank you for dinner.”

“I’ll make dinner more often if that’s what it gets me.” She laughs at his response and leans in for another kiss.

The kiss quickly deepens, but it’s soft and slow. YN moves herself to be sitting on his lap, knees bracketing his hips. Up until this point they haven’t done anything other than kissing and heavy petting. Pato desperately wanted to know every inch of YN, but knows that if he does what he has always done the results will always be the same. Plus the teasing has been incredibly hot, and he’s willing to wait for her.

When they pull away from each other they’re both a little breathless. Pato can feel his heartbeat in his throat, and is glad the room is dark because he’s sure there’s a pink tint across his face. He speaks before he can stop himself, “Don’t go.”

YN freezes in her spot perched in his lap, “What?”

“I don’t want you to leave. Stay, I’ll sleep on the couch if you want, we don’t have to do anything, just don’t go.” He’s begging at this point, but he really can’t stand the thought of her leaving him.

“You don’t have to sleep on the couch.” She leans in for another kiss, so soft he almost doesn’t feel it.

He gently coaxes her off his lap and leads her to his room. He grabs them both some pajamas from his dresser. He gives her a pair of sweatpants and an arrow mclaren hoodie, remembering that she’d told him she freezes in the night.

He got out an extra toothbrush for her, and showed her where his face wash and medicine was. While she got ready, he got dressed himself. They switched places when she came out of the bathroom.

As she waited for him she looked around his room, not what she expected, but she didn’t really know what she expected. He had a white comforter and sheets on the bed, with black and copper throw pillows. The furniture is black metal and dark wood, giving an industrial but homey vibe to the room.

He leaves the bathroom and YN takes the opportunity to really sink him in. He’s in a pair of grey sweatpants that make her a little crazy, and a tight white long sleeve that hugs his biceps so perfectly she’s drooling.

They climb into his bed together and YN immediately notices his smell enveloping her. He smells woodsy and warm. YN notices that they both climbed into opposite sides without thinking about it, another way they fit so perfectly together.

Pato lays on his back and YN hesitates before curling into his side. He wraps his arms around her shoulder and she entangles her leg with his and rests her hand on his chest, “Is this ok?” She asks him.

He can’t believe she even has to ask because he’s never been better. “Perfect.”

She starts absentmindedly scratching at his chest, and the last thing she remembers before drifting off is Pato kissing her head and whispering, “Buenas noches.”

That was the first of many nights spent together for YN and Pato. Already fallen for each other much more than either was willing to admit. Their souls as intertwined as their legs.

[becomingthevlillainsfamily]

Being locked together - Yandere Villain x Hero

“Sometimes” Hero glanced back, making sure that the unhinged maniac was still secured on the wall with the chains, giving him no freedom, to move even a bit.

“You just need to love your enemy” she had tried this method a lot many times, and when she says ‘This method has a 90% success rate’ it’s true.

Many times instead of cursing her opponent, she had shouted out her love for them, making them cringe and walk back, not fighting with her again, I mean what could they even say.

“I hate her because she loves me, admires me, cares for me, accepts my style is good, and though I am being such a douche' she’s still respecting me”

That’s how things always went, and so that’s what she planned on doing right now too. If she was going to die in this cramped, musty prison she might as well act as cringe and loathsome as she could.

“Hey” she whispered, her words tickling the ears of the person beside her.

“Yeah?” the villain muttered back, his head still at an odd angle, reclining back and touching the wall, while his spine was as straight as possible.

It had been six hours since she had been pursuing him, telling him to get out of this stupid prison together.

Taking a deep breath in, and fisting her clammy fists tightly, she whispered, her voice as soft and convincing as possible, if he wasn’t going to get out at her request, he might get out, if she annoys him, “I love you”.

The only thing the hero could hear now was her own heartbeat, currently dancing in her ears, and her heart, punching her ribs, probably palpating from second hand embarrassment. But this was just the starting.

“You are handsome, your chiseled jawline and obsidian colored orbs are amazing” yeah get as cringe as you can, she could see the villain flinching at her words, yet he did not glance up at her, or told her to shut up, so she continued.

“It’s not because of your face though, it’s because, I don’t know, I just find you awesome, and cool” unknowingly confiding her real feelings, hero clamped her burning cheeks together, “and if I am to be honest, If I were to write a love song, it would just be your name repeated over and over” she stopped, shock evident on her face, because she had did this once, written his name over and over, everyday for three hours.

‘It takes great dedication to hate someone’ hate? and as she had said earlier, maybe the 10% failure rate included you feeling embarrassed, or maybe realizing your own feelings.

Slowly slithering back, the hero covered her ears tightly, silence ringing in her head, and blood rushing crazily, making it both hard to breath and think.

It must have been a hallucinating, for she felt a hand pat on her head, and slowly her weight uplifting, snapping her eyes open she found herself trapped in the villain’s arms, “Hey” she shouted, but he ignored, continuing to walk briskly.

She controlled her feelings which she had almost dabbled into in a moment of frenzy, right now the motive was to get out of here, yup get out of here, not care about his strong, muscular arms, draping her over his shoulder, as he kicked the metal door, imbued with magic.

This was ridiculous, she had been trying to open that same door, for hours too, but it didn’t even budge, “That’s a good restriction they got for you”, she tilted her head up, unable to do so, glancing beside her she huffed, “What?”, sensing her discomfort, the villain pulled her up, making the hero dizzy, as she pressed her head on his shoulder, trying to overcome the weird feeling, coursing through her head. But the villain then again, would grab her over his shoulder, repeating the moment again and again, the situation now making the hero annoyed plus dizzy, “It’s kind of a magic, which increases when it comes in contact with you, so you can’t open the door” he sighed, glancing at the hero’s pitiful situation, she could hardly breathe now, “Do mind the inconvenience dear”, he muttered trying to sound as caring he could, but hero knew better, at that moment all the acting skills, and oath to not dabble in her anger, disappeared. She grabbed the villain her arms on both side of his neck, she wanted to put him in a chokehold, but barely able to think straight, her strength refused to cooperate.

The sceneries continued to change, at first it was the infamous black forest on the backdrop of a starry night, then it was a town dabbled in darkness, devoid of moon rays, I could barely comprehend the surroundings, though the dizziness made it harder to think the chilly gaze of this guy’s henchmen was not difficult to figure out, I felt my legs going numb, and silence shrieking in my ears.

This was the worst, after what felt like an eternity, I was thrown down on some soft mattress, savoring the sensation of sitting down in a correct position, after pulling myself up, I muttered “Better”.

My eyes now going through my surroundings, the room to perfect and ‘me-coded’ to be prepared in a hurry.

Yup, the 10% failure rate, also involved proposing to your crush, who is an obsessed stalker of yours.

[tiny-wooden-robot-fics]

Magnolia - Chapter Eighteen

Rating: Explicit Media: Jujutsu Kaisen Pairing(s): Geto Suguru x Original Female Character, Geto Suguru x Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru x Gojo Satoru x Original Female Character Additional Tags: Vampire AU, Dark Themes, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Depression, Loneliness, Polyamory, Slow Burn, Smut

A/N: Tags will be added as chapters are updated. Please be mindful of the tags and warnings at the beginning of each chapter, as they will tell you what you need to know about the content within.

Minors, DNI.

Summary:

He laughs. “Sometimes. But he does it so well that it’s hard to be annoyed for long, because you end up looking so good.” He uncrosses his arms and steps into the room, closing the distance between them in just a few strides. She turns to face him, feeling suddenly shy now that there’s only a few inches of space between their bodies. “Do you want me to stay out of it?”

Suguru is so good at keeping his face neutral; she can’t tell what he’s thinking at all when he asks. “Stay out of it?”

“Mmhm.” His gaze flickers from her eyes, moves down her body, and then back up to meet her eyes again. “If you want to be alone with Satoru, that’s perfectly okay with me.” 

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Chapter Masterlist

Read on AO3

Chapter Warnings: Oral (f. receiving), Squirting

Chapter Eighteen: Love's Acolyte

“Oh, that’s pretty.” Suguru looks at her from where he’s standing in the doorway of her room, arms crossed over his chest. “It suits you.”

She looks back at herself in the full-length mirror. What Satoru laid out for her is a set, made of lace and in almost the same shade as the dress she’s just changed out of. “Does it ever annoy you, this uncanny skill he has of finding things that look good on you?”

He laughs. “Sometimes. But he does it so well that it’s hard to be annoyed for long, because you end up looking so good.” He uncrosses his arms and steps into the room, closing the distance between them in just a few strides. She turns to face him, feeling suddenly shy now that there’s only a few inches of space between their bodies. “Do you want me to stay out of it?”

Suguru is so good at keeping his face neutral; she can’t tell what he’s thinking at all when he asks. “Stay out of it?”

“Mmhm.” His gaze flickers from her eyes, moves down her body, and then back up to meet her eyes again. “If you want to be alone with Satoru, that’s perfectly okay with me.” 

She hasn’t actually thought about it, and once he poses the question, she realizes she doesn’t actually know. A hot bubble of apprehension inflates in her chest, and she looks down at her feet. “I’ve… never been with two men at once.”

He puts his hands on her shoulders, his palms warm against her skin, and leans down so he can look her in the eye. “You don’t have to be if you don’t want to - not in that way,” he reassures her. “If you don’t want me there, I’ll let you be alone with him. If you want me there, but you just want me to watch, I’ll do that, too.” He smiles down at her, and it’s just as kind as it always is. “And if you say you’d like me to join in, well… I’d love to do that too - but when and how will be totally up to you.” 

Somehow, he always knows just what to say to alleviate her anxiety. “Your knack for finding the perfect words to ease my mind is as good as Satoru’s knack for finding clothing that looks good on me.” 

“Hm,” he hums with a grin. “Does it annoy you as much, too?”

“I can’t say that it does.”

“Good.” She doesn’t think it’s her imagination that he sounds just a little bit smug.

--

Many have loved you with lips and fingers And lain with you till the moon went out; Many have brought you lover’s gifts; And some have left their dreams on your doorstep. But I who am youth among your lovers Come like an acolyte to worship, My thirsting blood restrained by reverence,  My heart a wordless prayer. The candles of desire are lighted,  I bow my head, afraid before you,  A mendicant who craves your bounty Ashamed of what small gifts he brings. -Elsa Gidlow, Love’s Acolyte

--

“You look like a gift, wrapped up just for me,” Satoru tells her. She’s in his lap again, pressed up against him with his hands on her hips. “Suguru… how come you don’t wear this color more often, too?” “You know why,” Suguru murmurs. He joins them in bed and rolls over onto his side, his head resting in his hand as he watches them. “I look terrible in that shade of blue.” He reaches up and lets his fingertips dance gently down the path of Lia’s spine, making her shudder, arching her closer into Satoru. 

And the way Satoru looks up at her makes her skin flush hot all over, because it’s not just lust. It’s not just some half-baked desire that’s sprung up out of nowhere… it’s a different flavor of the longing he looks at Suguru with. She leans forward because she wants to kiss him, again and again and again, and so she does. 

Deeply enough to feel like she’s drowning in him, deeply enough to worry that she’ll go lightheaded if she doesn’t come up for air soon, deeply enough to make her start squirming into him because it feels like the only way to get the friction she so desperately wants. 

“Easy, Princess,” Satoru laughs quietly, when she breaks the kiss to breathe. “I’m right here.” 

“Stop teasing her, Satoru.”

“Me? Teasing her is the last thing on my mind.” Lia believes him, because she can feel how hard he is beneath her - the thin, soft fabric of his boxer briefs doing nothing to hide the evidence of his desire. She can’t tell anymore if the wet patch on the lace panties she’s wearing is from her or him. 

She supposes it doesn’t really matter anyway. 

She reaches between them, wanting to feel him. Wanting to wrap her fingers around him, to gauge his shape and size with her hand. “I want…” The words come out barely louder than a whisper, and they don’t even begin to encompass all of the thoughts that fall under the umbrella of that phrase: I want. 

“Hm?” He nudges her chin up with his finger, so he can look into her eyes. How does anyone resist these eyes? She wonders. Maybe they don’t. “What is it that you want, Lia?” 

“You.” The word spills out of her without any hesitation. There is no shame, no pride in how quickly she answers his question. Her hand finds purchase between them, fingers closing around the base of his shaft. Her stomach flutters at how full her fist feels when she tries to get her fingertips to meet the tip of her thumb, and she draws in a quiet little breath. 

Satoru hears that sharp little inhale, sees the surprise on her face, and it makes him chuckle. He cups the back of her head, bringing her face close to his so he can nuzzle her cheek with his nose. “Why don’t you let me open you up a little first, yeah?” --

Lia still remembers with perfect clarity every single second of the way Suguru put his mouth on her. 

She remembers the way he alternated between using his mouth and using his fingers, the way he kept his gaze on her when he sensed she was getting close to her orgasm, how closely he paid attention to the signs her body gave him and used those signs to dictate what he would do next. 

It had indeed left her speechless, but this is something entirely different. 

The mouth on Gojo Satoru - it makes her wonder, is his tongue fucking battery operated?

The way he’s slurping and sucking and licking, three fingers buried as deeply into her as they can go, massaging her walls - it has her shaking and sweating and biting her fist in order to muffle the sounds she’s making. 

It isn’t Satoru that reaches up and pries her hand out of her mouth. “He wants to hear you, pretty girl,” Suguru coos, pressing a kiss to her palm. “How else is he supposed to know he’s doing a good job?”

Again and again and again, Satoru brings her to the edge over and over, only to pull her back when she’s close. Until she’s seeing stars, until she’s almost in tears, until she’s absolutely incapable of anything other than incoherent babbling. 

Satoru thinks she’s so pretty, with those big tears clumped on her lashes and her swollen lips and sweat-slicked skin. She’s a goddamned work of art, and he’s about to make it better. 

He brings her to the edge one last time, and then takes her over, and it’s so satisfying watching the way she gushes for him… but what’s even more satisfying is the look on her face, the look that lets him know that this is her first time ever being able to do that. 

“What a mess,” Suguru teases her from his place next to her. 

They don’t let her cover her face. Satoru is so, so warm. He finally puts her legs down and drapes himself over her, chest to chest, his soft, wet lips dragging along her collarbone. “Messy girl,” he smirks, exchanging an amused look with Suguru. He lifts his hand, the one that was just inside of her, to Suguru’s lips. “Isn’t she delicious?” Said between kisses, his mouth slotting over Lia’s so she can also taste herself on his tongue and his other hand snaking between their bodies to lightly caress her swollen labia. 

“Just as delicious as I remember,” Suguru agrees. 

“Did you know, Lia? Did you know you also speak a lot with your eyes?” 

She glances over at Suguru, who’s still sucking on Satoru’s fingers. “I’ve been told that once or twice,” she admits. 

“I bet you have.” 

Lia marvels at it - how all the anxiety she felt just a little while ago is gone now. How these two have managed to take that nervous ball of energy that was in the pit of her stomach and turn it into something else entirely. Something that has her wanting so much more, something that brings out of her a greed that she’s never felt the likes of before.

She wonders if a little of that is showing on her face. It must be, if the way the two of them are looking at her is any indication.

“Are you tired, Lia?” Satoru asks. 

“No.” 

“Good,” he grins, shifting a little, just enough for her to feel how hard he is, pressed against her thigh. “Because I’m not quite done with you yet.” 

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Chapter Masterlist

Tag list: @therealestpussyeater

[kumezyzo]

hii, its 🐇

i was wondering if i could make a request; sapnap secretly is head over heels for reader but only his friends know and they tease him for it, causing him to become a nervous wreck around reader

it can be headcanons or a fic i don't mind!! thank uu

again, super short, please dont hate me 😭 thank you for requesting this months ago 😭😭 i made it a little angsty as per my writing style, but i hope you dont mind. it gets a lil fluffy at the end. no real angst here 😁

anyway, enjoy! or dont :) m.list

crush!sap really just wants to be around you. he doesn't realize that doing that makes him short-circuit.

he becomes a blushing mess. he talks like a bumbling idiot. he laughs at all your jokes. it gets to the point where his heart rate speeds up with even the mention of your name. and he begins to think it isn't very healthy for him.

everyone around you seemed to know crush!sap was obsessed with you. whenever he made a move to stand closer to you, talk to you, or even just stare at you for too long, the people around you would share a knowing glance. until it got slightly annoying and they started teasing him

"sapnap, stop flirting with them and get your ass over here."

"oooh, they're flirting againnnn!"

"so then you- can you stop staring at them and pay attention??!"

and his reaction was always the same. blushing, looking away from you, and running away from you.

then, crush!sapnap truly started avoiding you. for his own medical safety. and you began to assume it was cause he didn't like being thought of as your bf.

but, you talked to him about it. cause that was the only way you thought it could quell your thoughts.

"hey, can we talk?"

"oh. um- uh- y-yeah, sure..."

"are you avoiding me?"

he was already blushing by you catching him off-guard. now, you had caught onto his plan and it made him feel a little sick.

"why would- ha- why would you say that?" he would ask nervously.

"look, its fine if you are... i guess. i just kinda wanted to know why..." you'd say awkwardly. he would just stare at you, opening his mouth to say something but shutting it over and over like a fish. "mostly because i like you and i recently started thinking you felt the same way. so if thats not the case and thats why you're avoiding me then-"

"no! no thats not why!" he would say nervously, trying to interupt you before the conversation went somewhere he could reverse. "its because i like you!"

you stare at him, puzzled. "...huh?"

"you make me go fucking crazy. all the time," he sighs. "and it actually hurts when i see you and i know you're not mine. so i would rather just... not see you all together..."

"oh..." butterflies would errupt in your stomach. and your heart would start beating abnormally hard. abnormally quickly. and you started to realize why he needed to get away from you.

happy ending, kisses and hugs. just realized i lowkey fucked up the tenses at the end... -nony

[mimisempai]

The end of loneliness 5/7

Chapter Summary

Aziraphale is a bundle of nerves waiting for Anthony to arrive home for dinner. But fortunately his friend Muriel comes to the rescue.

Notes

After the heaviness of the last chapter, a light, tender chapter.

On Ao3

Rating G - 1919 words

Masterpost here

Aziraphale ran his hand over the immaculate tablecloth, smoothing out a nonexistent crease. The table was beautifully set, the candles cast a warm glow, a tantalizing scent wafted through the air, and yet Aziraphale was a mess.

He was about to receive Anthony for dinner and began to wonder what had possessed him to spontaneously invite his lover into his home when he'd never done so in his life.

The thought alone sent his mind into a whirlwind of anxiety. 

What if Anthony didn't like the food? 

What if Anthony thought Azirapahle was overdoing it?

What if Anthony was bored? 

He sighed and paced his apartment, each step echoing in the silence. A silence that convinced him to put on some music. After all, music soothes the soul, as they say.

Aziraphale rummaged through his record collection, the only thing he'd taken with him when he left the family home and after a few moments, he put a record on the player, the warm tones of smooth jazz filling the room. 

After a few seconds, however, he realized that it wouldn't change anything. He was still as nervous as ever.

He picked up his phone and hesitated for a few seconds before dialing Muriel's number.

He didn't have to wait more than ten seconds before he heard his friend's voice.

"Aziraphale? Why are you calling me? Aren't you supposed to be having dinner with Anthony?"

"He's about to arrive, and that's the problem."

"Hm?"

Aziraphale repeated the same questions running through his head, "What if he doesn't like the food? What if he thinks I'm overdoing it? What if he's bored? It's not the same as eating out. There's no escape."

A light laugh answered him, and a little annoyed he continued, "Muriel, it's not funny, I'm serious."

"Sorry, sorry. But you're worrying so much about nothing, Zira. On a concrete level, I've tasted your cooking, so I'm absolutely sure he'll like what you make. And no, you're not overdoing it, and if you are, at worst it shows how much you care for him, and in the end, I saw his face this afternoon and the way he talked about you. There's no danger of him getting bored with you. It's clear to me that he has it as bad as you do."

Aziraphale felt a gentle warmth come over him in response to Muriel's last words. He knew his own feelings and how they were evolving, but he didn't want to fool himself about Anthony's either; he couldn't pretend to read his lover's heart. So it was reassuring to hear an outsider who knew him and didn't know Anthony confirm what he hoped was true. 

Muriel continued, "As always, be yourself. I'm sure it will be a great evening. Don't worry, Aziraphale. Everything will be fine."

They chatted for a few more seconds, then Aziraphale hung up after thanking his friend.

With Muriel's assurance echoing in his mind, he felt a new wave of confidence wash over him. He went into the kitchen to check on the cooking of the main course, and after lowering the heat under the pan, he quickly went into the bathroom to check his outfit and hairstyle. 

His new-found self-confidence wavered slightly, however, when the front doorbell rang, causing his heart to miss a beat. He glanced to make sure everything was in place, glanced at himself in the mirror as he walked out into the hallway, and went to open the door.

Anthony stood in the doorway, a wry smile on his lips. He was incredibly handsome, his golden eyes shining with a mischievous gleam. 

"If you were trying to lure me in with your cooking, you succeeded, because the smell wafting through the air makes my mouth water."

Aziraphale laughed nervously before reaching for Anthony's coat, who caught him in his arms as he turned and pressed a light kiss to his lips. Aziraphale couldn't help but smile, his nervousness melting away as Anthony added against his lips, "It's not just the smell of food that makes my mouth water, by the way."

His lover winked playfully and Aziraphale laughed lightly as he led him into the living room.

A few hours later, as Aziraphale picked at the last crumbs of dessert, he thought he shouldn't have been nervous, because the evening had gone like a dream. Hardly different from their first dinner in the restaurant, if only because he felt that their bond had been strengthened by what had happened earlier in the afternoon. Aziraphale had initially thought that the baring of his heart and the way Anthony had comforted him would cause some awkwardness between him and his lover, but on the contrary it had made their interaction even easier.

"What are you thinking about?"

Anthony's deep voice jolted Aziraphale from his thoughts and he replied softly, "I must confess that I was rather nervous before your arrival for various reasons."

Anthony moved his hand forward across the table and placed it on Aziraphale's, caressing it reassuringly.

"You had absolutely nothing to be nervous about. I'm having an excellent evening, and it's not because of the decor, which is lovely, by the way, or the delicious food, or the sweet music, but because of you. I have to tell you, even if the food hadn't been good, I would have loved this evening. Because it was with you".

Aziraphale, embarrassed, chuckled slightly, really not used to receiving compliments yet, and blushed at the intensity of Anthony's gaze.

"I'm glad you're having a good evening, and in case you're interested, I'm having an excellent one." 

Aziraphale rose to clear the table and shook his head when Anthony offered to help. 

"You can go to the sofa if you like, I'll be right back. Would you like some coffee, tea?"

"No, thank you, nothing for me."

"A little after dinner drink then?"

Anthony replied with a playful twinkle in his eye, "Oh no, I'd better keep my cool, you're intoxicating enough as it is."

A blushing Aziraphale hurried to take the dishes into the kitchen to hide his embarrassment, although Anthony had time to watch his flushed cheeks with amusement. 

When Aziraphale returned to the living room, he saw that Anthony had gone to his record player and had just changed the music, the notes of a slow, sensual melody now filling the room.

When Anthony heard him return, he walked over to Aziraphale, held out his hand and asked quietly, "Will you grant me this dance?"

Aziraphale hesitated.

"I've never danced before."

"Never?"

Aziraphale shook his head.

"That's all right, darling," Anthony took Aziraphale's hand and added, "For this kind of dance, all you need is the right partner. And you're lucky..."

He opened his arms.

"I'm here. Come, let's dance."

His apprehension now turning to mild excitement, Aziraphale slipped into Anthony's arms. His arms wrapped around his lover's waist as Anthony's arms tightened around him.

They began to move slowly together, and as they swayed gently to the music, the outside world gradually faded away. Aziraphale snuggled a little closer to Anthony, pressing his cheek against his warm chest, causing Anthony, who had his chin on his head, to hum with appreciation.

Anthony murmured, his lips in Aziraphale's hair, "See, you're a natural," he pressed a light kiss on Aziraphale's head, who replied in an amused voice, "It's not too difficult, I just let myself be led."

"That's why it's perfect."

They continued to sway, enveloped by the music that created a cocoon around them, where only their two hearts existed, beating in perfect harmony at that moment. 

As the music faded, Anthony pushed Aziraphale back slightly to grab his chin, and their eyes met in a gaze that said more than words ever could. Slowly, he leaned in and pressed his lips to Aziraphale's, a gentle exploration that sent a shiver of electricity through both of them, their lips and bodies instantly regaining the familiarity and ease of their first kisses.

Lost in the lingering kiss, they found themselves on the sofa, their bodies pressed together, their breaths mingling, the outside world forgotten. The kiss intensified, the passion between them growing stronger, but as they seemed to surrender to the moment, Anthony felt a sudden tension radiating from his lover. 

Lying on top of Aziraphale at that moment, he propped himself up on his elbows and said in a soft voice, "Hey, we don't have to go any further if you're not ready."

Aziraphale swallowed, then said, blushing slightly, "I need more time. I know it's a bit silly, since we've already gone further, since we've already had our first night together, but..."

"But the situation was different. What we have now is different."

Anthony ran his thumb over Aziraphale's cheek, "We got things a bit mixed up, but just because we've already spent the night - a delicious night, I confess - just because we've already spent the night together doesn't mean we have to jump right in. We've got plenty of time. It's not a race. The most important thing is that we talk - together. I can only move forward if I know we're on the same wavelength. If you know that when you say stop, I'll stop and vice versa."

Aziraphale's embarrassment gave way to relief and gratitude. "Thank you... I really appreciate it."

Then, his shy smile became more playful as he continued, "But I wouldn't mind continuing where we left off."

"That's good to know, because..."

Anthony leaned in again and continued against Aziraphale's lips, "...I want to keep going, too. " 

He closed the distance between their lips and captured his lover's for another kiss. This time it unfolded naturally, drawing them closer as they explored the tender space between them.

When things began to heat up again, Anthony slowed down, pulled back, allowing Aziraphale to breathe, the rhythm of their connection softening to a gentle one. They kissed deeply, lovingly, each moment a wordless conversation, a promise of what was to come.

Minutes stretched into what seemed like hours, and soon the outside world faded into a still night. As their bodies settled into the sofa, lulled by the soothing sounds of their soft kisses and the dim light that surrounded them, fatigue crept up on them until they finally succumbed to sleep, curled up together on the sofa, Aziraphale covering them with a plaid in a last gasp of consciousness. 

As the morning light filtered through the windows a few hours later, Anthony awoke to find Aziraphale still snuggled against him, their limbs entwined in a cocoon of warmth and trust. He gently brushed Aziraphale's hair back, suddenly overcome by a surge of affection as he saw the peaceful expression on his lover's sleeping face.

Aziraphale moved slightly and his eyes opened to meet Anthony's. 

"Good morning."

His voice was slightly hoarse and a slight smile played on his lips.

"Good morning."

Anthony placed a soft kiss on Aziraphale's forehead before asking, "Did you sleep well?"

Aziraphale admitted honestly, "Even if it wasn't the most comfortable or the longest night I've had, I slept better than I have in a long time".

Anthony nodded, sharing the same feeling. 

They stayed there for a while, wrapped in each other's presence, wanting to make the moment last before reality took over again and their duties called them back. There was no rush, no expectations - just a shared understanding that they were building something beautiful, one step at a time.

This was only the beginning.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable fan fictions Masterpost : here

[aeligsido]

[WM] Prompt 24 — Kid fic.

Rating: G.

TW: Snape being his delightful self.

Characters: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Maeve Lupin (OC), Severus Snape, Fleur Delacour, Ginny Weasley.

Additional Tags: Maeve is Remus’ adopted daughter, she’s also a baby werewolf, Snape has beef with a seven year old and is losing, bigotry, slur I guess?, this awkward moment when you went to prison and your fiance got himself a kid and now you don’t know what your relationship is anymore, Sirius and Remus are both dads, OotP, a bit of Fleur appreciation bc i love her.

Summary: Sirius watches as Fleur and Maeve excitedly talk.

Words count: 813.

A/N: Missing Scene for a fic I haven't written yet lmao. I hope you like it! ❤️

@wolfstarmicrofic

—

Sirius watches as Fleur and Maeve excitedly talk, the little girl making large hand gestures all the while. Fleur joining the Order is surprisingly not surprising, considering what happened just short of two months ago — she barely even took the time to go back to her own country before signing up. And she’s good with kids, never making Maeve feel less because of her young age, which can only endear her to Sirius.

Molly is busying herself in the kitchen once again; her children are scattered around, Ron looking more and more annoyed each time they remind him he can’t tell Harry anything. Ginny doesn’t exactly look better either. The twins are talking to each other in low tones, seemingly unaware of the world around them; Sirius knows better for seeing them react to anyone coming a bit too close to their private discussion. Bill is alternating between trying to help his mother and looking at Fleur with a look in his eyes Sirius knows well.

Remus is drinking his tea beside him, his gaze fixed on Maeve as well. She laughs, and she sounds just like Remus when they were young and invincible. She doesn’t have his hair nor his eyes, or even anything of him, yet she is so jarringly his daughter all the same.

Maeve Lupin, taking their old heart hostage since 1993 and onward. Sirius smiles into his own tea.

Snape suddenly comes in like a bat out of hell (and who should have stayed here). He sneers, his usual expression when in the presence of anything breathing. His sudden arrival stops all motion in the room — even Molly turns around with a new tension in her shoulders — except, of course, for Maeve who somehow manages to not notice him. One of her wide hand gestures ends up with her bumping into Snape, and she blinks owlishly at him as she realizes his presence.

“Oops. Sorry!”

Remus puts down his cup, watching the exchange carefully. Sirius feels ready for a fight. Snape sneers some more.

“Should learn to leash the beast,” he says, and Sirius sees red; Maeve straightens up, scowling, and wonderfully unphased.

“You’re mean and ugly and still wear the same robes than two years ago!”

Remus snorts, a low sound nobody else probably caught. Snape opens his mouth to answer; Sirius has already silenced him.

“Don’t fucking talk to my daughter like that.”

Snape glares and glares and glares some more; then, with a dramatic swish of his cape and a last sneer, he disappears into the corridor.

“Why he's so mean anyways?” Maeve huffs, still scowling, and Sirius hates seeing her like that — she’s a child, she should smile and laugh and be happy.

“Oh, he's just a jealous dick,” comments Ginny, ignoring her mother’s following reprobation to wink at them.

Maeve thinks it over. “Because I'm smart and pretty and he's not?”

“The smartest and the prettiest,” confirms Sirius, and things suddenly feel a bit lighter.

-

When they had to move into Grimmauld Place, the first room they cleaned up and decorated and otherwise made sure looked just right was Maeve’s.

Despite the clutter expected from a seven year old, the room is still clean and perfectly lived-in in a way his parents would have hated. Not enough control, probably.

Technically, Sirius has no reason to be here and kiss Maeve goodnight, but he’ll be damned if he misses it for anything. Maybe it keeps making things weird between him and Remus, because truthfully they still have no idea where they stand with each other, and Maeve calling them both her fathers is delightful and not helping at all. But he'll do it all the same.

That night, Remus grabs his hand as they exit her room and close the door behind them; there’s a look in his eyes, fond and hopeful and a little bit of something else, too, that Sirius recognizes so well.

“You called her your daughter,” he says.

Sirius thinks back to the scene in the kitchen. “I did.” He never had before; Remus is the one who adopted her, not him.

For a few seconds, Remus doesn't say anything, absentmindedly playing with Sirius’ fingers instead; he looks almost shy, as if trying to find his words and failing, and it reminds Sirius of their first year at Hogwarts when Remus was still so afraid of everything.

“I liked it,” he finally admits, and Sirius catches him blushing, and he can’t stop smiling.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Sirius lifts his hand to Remus’ cheek; in the dim light of the corridor, he looks just the same as when he kissed him for the first time.

“Good. I don’t plan to stop.”

Remus nods, squeezing his hand before dropping it, offering him a bit of his space back; instead, Sirius bends down and kisses his cheek.

(Maybe they’ll be alright, in the end.)

[pots-sibly]

A 'big failure' (as I would have seen it before accepting my illness) that I'm trying to turn into a little victory:

My symptoms get much worse on my period. Nausea, fatigue, dizziness and shortness of breath. It makes sense- POTS being linked with low blood volume, and my periods having always been very painful and intense even before this- but since getting on birth control, they've been a little bit more manageable. This is both a good and a bad thing: good, because I'm no longer going to the ER with severe pain and confusion, but bad because now, instead of the pain keeping me in bed all day, the symptoms will sometimes come on in bursts without warning. Meaning, I'll start feeling good enough to try doing something, only to be hit with crippling pain and fatigue out of nowhere.

I've been really craving sweets, and had just taken my painkillers on schedule, so I figured I'd be good to go out to the grocery store for some ice cream. It's about a ten minute walk, fifteen on a bad day, so I thought I'd be home in about half an hour and have a nice treat. So I put on actual clothes, grabbed my cane 'just in case,' and headed out.

Immediately, the first thing I noticed was hot how it was. My weather app says 23 C, but it's pretty humid here especially in the summer, and there wasn't much of a breeze, so I started sweating pretty much instantly. Still, it's a manageable walk, and I've been feeling alright the last few hours, so whatever.

My first warning was when I started shivering. Again, it's hot and humid outside, and when I'd set out I had been sweating and warm. But suddenly, I had goosebumps and was feeling chilled, even though I could still feel myself sweating. I brushed it off as the breeze making me cold after sweating, which fine, okay, that can happen.

About five minutes away from the store, I realized I was getting short of breath. Again, I brushed it off, thinking it was because I haven't been going on my nightly walks for a while and am maybe a little out of shape. I tried to focus on my breathing, and told myself I'd take a seat at the bus stop outside of the store before I went in.

By the time I got to the bus stop, I was almost wheezing, and my head was spinning. I sat down and took my heart rate, saw it was 116, and took a few minutes to try and slow it down, but I couldn't catch my breath. It sort of felt like I was having a panic attack, or like the air was getting lost in my throat before it could reach my lungs, like a balloon with a pinprick that you can't quite inflate.

It was hotter sitting at the bus stop, so when I decided I could stand up without falling over, I went into the grocery store and was quick with my purchases. I was getting dizzier every moment I was standing, so I went back to the bus stop bench right after.

This is where the failure-turned-victory comes in. I couldn't catch my breath, I was sweating through my shirt, and I was dizzy like I was getting a headrush, despite sitting for several minutes. I kept telling myself that I just needed to calm down and quickly walk home, that I could push through it and get it over with. And maybe this time last year, I would've tried. Instead, I opened my phone and ordered an uber, despite the ride home being about two minutes.

I want to be able to push through when I have moments like this. And there are times when I do push myself: when I'm boxing, when I'm trying new foods, when I'm going to conventions. But on this random Thursday, sitting outside my grocery store a ten minutes walk from my apartment, I knew that I couldn't push this. I knew I would hurt myself if I did.

I'm trying to be proud of knowing my limits. I'm trying not to think about the 'unnecessary expense' of the ride, or about whether the driver was annoyed doing such a short trip. I'm trying not to think about the little monster in my head that wants me to believe that I'm lazy and entitled. Instead, I'm reminding myself that there is a difference between pushing to improve, and pushing to harm. I shouldn't have walked to the store, I know that now. But I recognized that I needed help, and I didn't put myself in a situation where I could have been hurt.

I don't really think this story has a point. I'm feeling better now, and will be taking it easy for the rest of the evening. I hope you take this as a sign that it's okay to allow yourself to 'take the easy way,' because sometimes, the alternative isn't the best option.

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Black Heart Part 8

Regulus Black AU

Request: Will you write a Regulus x Reader fic where Regulus is older than the reader? She comes to help the Order and Regulus falls in love with her. The relationship isn’t easy because of the war and Regulus’ denial that he would be a good boyfriend.

Summary: Admitting that he was in love had never been something that Regulus wanted to do. Now that you were in his life, Regulus didn’t know how to react. Should he love you or push you away just like he had everyone else?

Rating: M

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Link to Part 7

_____

“I’m really not ready to go back to reality.”

Regulus commented as he unlocked the door to Grimmauld Place. After two weeks away, Regulus had gotten completely comfortable with the “drama-free easy” existence that the two of you had. There was no war, no order, no secret missions that could kill him it was just the two of you happy and free.

Maybe someday…when all of this is over we can run away someplace and be happy.

That was the thought that was keeping Regulus going.

You placed a hand on the small of Regulus’ back stopping his gloomy yet hopeful thoughts.

“Hopefully it will all be over soon.”

You said, softly. Regulus only nodded. He hated going back in a terrible mood but he was in one. After being away from Grimmauld Place for two weeks, Regulus quickly began to realize how badly the house wore on him. If Regulus didn’t know any better, he would say that it was Grimmauld Place that made him so damn moody.

It only makes sense. This house is a damn mood killer.

Regulus thought before turning to look at you. You gave him a sweet smile that made Regulus stop in his place. He stood a moment before turning back to you. Cupping the side of your face, he pulled your body to his.

“When all of this is over, I am taking an oily rag and a match to this place. We can take our babies and move someplace else.”

You had the feeling that Regulus wasn’t joking. If he had an excuse to get rid of his family home, he would probably take it. You gently pushed a strand of windblown curls away from Regulus’ face.

“When you do it be sure to call Sirius. I’m sure he would love to make smores.”

You were relieved when Regulus smiled at that one. When he had woken up in a mood from hell earlier, you were afraid that he would be this way for days.

“We can both light a match at the same time. I have waited a long time to see this place go up in flames…I won’t be robbed of it because I’m being nice to my older brother.”

Regulus quietly thought about the time when he was five and he set fire to the living room drapes. Sirius was the one that took the fall for him and got the cruciatus curse so Regulus wouldn’t be harmed. Regulus was once again reminded how, despite Sirius being super annoying and loud, he did care about his brother.

“I’m sure we can arrange something…just like we can like we can go upstairs and you can take my lingerie off with your teeth.”

You suggested as you let one hand drop to Regulus’ belt buckle. When he groaned, you couldn’t help but smile.

“Love, we have an Order meeting and now I’m going to have to walk in there with an erection.”

Kissing Regulus softly, you continued to tease him through his pants until the front door opened. Sirius stood watching the two of you with a smirk.

“And we wonder why she’s pregnant?”

Regulus nearly jumped away from you before taking his jacket off and holding it in front of his body.

“Fuck you, Sirius! You standing there watching like a giant pervert!”

Sirius moved out of the way so the two of you could go inside.

“I figured two weeks away would have taken care of all of those hormones.”

“Not a chance.”

Regulus commented as you patted his cheek and went off in search of Molly and Tonks. You had an engagement ring to show them and couldn’t wait any longer.

Regulus meanwhile followed Sirius into the dining room with an annoyed expression on his face. Kreacher came out of nowhere ready to take Regulus’ jacket.

“Master Regulus, Kreacher can take your jacket…”

Regulus shook his head.

“Not at the moment, Kreacher.”

Sirius had sat down on the table and was quietly chuckling. He raised an eyebrow when he saw all of the love bites on Regulus’ neck (that his hair couldn’t cover)

“Have you seen your neck?”

Regulus raised a hand up to his neck and realized that he forgot to conceal a few of the marks that you had left. He quickly got a cocky expression on his face before turning to Sirius.

“She’s an animal, man.”

Sirius shook his head.

“So the conspiracy about pregnant women being super horny is true? Either that or you're catching up on what you didn’t do as a teenager.”

Regulus flipped Sirius off and moved to sit down.

“Fuck you, I did a lot more than you realize. Did anything interesting happen while we were away?”

Sirius’ amused smile faded as Remus came in with Harry behind him. He hated the thought of ruining Regulus’ good mood but it was better that he told him now.

“Well…”

Regulus looked up at that one.

“What do you mean, well?”

Sirius stood up and gently tugged on his own hair a bit.

“Two things…Nicolas came here and basically said he is going to fight you over Y/n. I’m not as concerned with that because I know that you can take him. What does concern me is the fact that Peter Pettigrew just happened to see you with Y/n. If my suspicions are unfortunately right…he probably went and told that crackpot that you used to serve.”

Regulus stood frozen. Sirius winced slightly at the expression on his brother’s face. Regulus didn’t make an expression for a moment before he turned to see you talking to Tonks with a wide smile on your face.

Fuck

Was all that Regulus could say in his mind. You were happy…the two of you were happy. For two fucking weeks, it felt as though the two of you had no worries and now you were both thrown right back into hell’s frying pan.

“I don’t want her to know right now. I don’t want her to be afraid to leave the house…but I also don’t want her to leave the house…”

Sirius stood quietly a moment. His attention had turned to you too. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for not only yourself but Regulus too. Sirius was more than thrilled to see his younger, less sunny, brother happy for once. Sirius hadn’t said anything but it but he never tired of seeing Regulus turn into instant sunshine the moment that you walked into a room. The last thing that Sirius wanted was for that to ever end. Regulus deserved to be happy. You deserved to be happy. Neither of you needed to be worried because some icky creepy little man just happened to ring the “dinner bell.”

“You aren’t going to tell her?”

Sirius questioned as Regulus ran a hand through his hair. Regulus was silent a moment before groaning. Merlin, if this wasn’t one of those “isn’t the results of my actions coming back to bite me in the ass” moments.

“I’ll tell her. I just don’t want to tell her right now…not today. Damn it, what shitty timing.”

Regulus moved to sit down while muttering to himself. Sirius stood a moment before going to sit on the table.

“I mean, would there ever really be a good time for that new?”

Regulus rolled his eyes.

“No, there wouldn’t but its extra shitty right now. I fucking just proposed to her Sirius. I just proposed to her and the babies started moving…now I have to go tell her some little fucktard that I used to work with knows everything about us.”

Sirius winced. Regulus was definitely right on that one. It was an “extra” shitty time.

“To be fair, I never thought that I would see you propose marriage to anyone. So did you do the dramatic getting down on one knee nonsense?”

Regulus shook his head.

“No, not my style.”

Sirius immediately made a face.

“Please tell me that you didn’t tell her that she was marrying you and that was the end of the conversation?”

Regulus stared at his brother for a few moments and quietly wondered how they were related.

“Of course not, you idiot. I did make it romantic…like on the beach…just the two of us.”

Sirius nodded, looking relieved.

“Please tell me Kreacher wasn’t there. He follows the two of you around like crazy. He’s probably up there telling Mother’s portrait all about it, as we speak. Hey! Have you shown Y/n to the crazy old bat yet?”

Regulus instantly shook his head.

“I want her to marry me, Sirius. I don’t want her to leave me.”

“Good thing mum is dead. So the babies are moving huh, that has to be exciting. I can’t wait to have little minions to play with.”

Regulus smirked.

“Yeah, I woke up to them kicking me in the back in the middle of the night. I swear to Merlin, Sirius, if you make them crazy I will murder you in your sleep.”

Sirius chuckled.

“Look, I have accepted that I will never have kids. Now that your getting them I am going to really take on my role of fun uncle and your haughty ass can’t stop me.”

“I really hope the twins totally look the same and they take great pride in fucking with you.”

Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment.

“So, genuinely curious, what are you going to do if they are identical? Is it going to be like with a turtle and put a bit of fingernail varnish on one of their backs so we know which is which?”

Regulus looked immediately disgusted.

“You are NOT doing that to my children! Sirius, even baboons can recognize their own babies.”

“I know but what if you do confuse them? Each kid will think that they are someone else and go through their life with an identity crisis that they HAVE NO IDEA about. That would be horrible. Like you go through life thinking that your name is Helen and you are actually a Myrtle.”

Regulus continued to stare at Sirius as if he was the most insane person that he had ever seen in his life.

“Would you fucking stop? I would never name my children Helen and Myrtle! You are stressing me out! Look, I have already made a couple of systems…to stop any of that from happening. Like, for example, we are going primarily to dress each kid in a second color. Now unless you are colorblind and I do not know it, that system should be easy for you. Second, I know for a fact that once each baby is born they will stamp the hands and feet prints of each kid. If color mismatching happens, we can simply match each baby to their hand print.”

Sirius blinked and was thankful that he wasn’t the only one worrying about this. It sounded like, whether Regulus wanted to admit it, that he had been putting a lot of thought into this matter too. Regulus was probably having an internal crisis when he was told that they were having identical twins and thought of all that stuff to soothe himself.

“And baboons recognize their own babies, huh?”

Regulus flipped Sirius off before leaning back in his chair.

“Shut up.”

Regulus only nodded before the dark thoughts returned. He stood and went into the kitchen where you were talking to Andromeda. The older woman was smiling as she turned to face Regulus. It had been a long time since Andromeda had seen Regulus and now here he stood looking exactly as he had the last time they had spoken.

Andromeda hadn’t said it but she was greatly concerned when Tonks told her that you were dating Regulus. When Tonks let it slip that you were pregnant, Andromeda nearly fainted. Regulus was the last person that she EVER saw you be interested in. You were almost a second daughter to Andromeda and now here you were dating someone extremely dangerous. It wasn’t that Andromeda disliked Regulus. He was just a product of the Black family gone crazy.

Her thoughts on the matter changed when Tonks told her that Regulus wasn’t the person that she thought he was. She learned about Regulus playing double agent, at great risk to himself…after that, all of her thoughts on her younger cousin changed. Once again she was the darling little boy that she remembered.

“There you are.”

You said with a smile on your face. Regulus absolutely hated the thought of telling you the news that was just dropped on him. It made him sick to his stomach. You hadn’t stopped smiling since he put the engagement rings on your finger and felt the babies move for the first time…now he was going to ruin it.

“Hi, Andi. It's nice to see you.”

Regulus said softly as your face turned to his. Your happy smile faded the moment that you realized that something was wrong.

“It's nice to see you too, Regulus. You’ve picked a lovely woman for a wife.”

Regulus couldn’t help the small smile that formed on his face. Of course, he had picked a lovely woman. You were everything that was perfect for him. He hadn’t said it but you had saved him in every way that person could be saved.

“She’s perfect in every way.”

Regulus replied. Andromeda was pleased with his response. After the age of 8, Regulus rarely gave out compliments. When he did make them, it was usually backhanded insults that one could take as a complement. Now here he was seemingly happy with the knowledge that he was about to be a married man and father.

“Y/n, I need to talk to you for a moment.”

You nodded and followed Regulus into the sitting room nearest the kitchen. Regulus shut the door before sitting down. You waited a moment before taking your place on his lap. Whatever seemed to be eating Regulus was bad enough to make him look ready to burn the world down.

“What’s bothering you? You’re making that face.”

Regulus slowly stroked his fingers over your stomach. Everything was a mess now but he wouldn’t let it ruin things between the two of you. For once, he was happy with what life had given him and Voldemort was not going to ruin that for him. The fucking morons that he used to work with were not going to rip apart his life. If Regulus had to kill them all then he would. He used to have no problem with killing people. When it came to his kids and wife, Regulus would have no problem killing for the protection of the three of you.

“I have some bad news. Do you remember me mentioning Peter Pettigrew to you a long time ago?”

You nodded, you had not forgotten that name. In fact, you had not forgotten the name of a single death eater.

“I do…Reggie, what is it? You're making me nervous.”

Regulus tightened his hold on you.

“While we were at the beach, apparently Peter saw us. Sirius and the order believe that he probably went to Voldemort and told him everything. The Order thinks that we, for the time being, need to lay low. If I know anything about Lord Snakeface, he hasn’t forgotten what I figured out about him and how I betrayed him. I didn’t want to tell you but you need to know. I know you love your job but…”

You quickly held a hand up. A surge of fear instantly went through you. The monster of a man that all of you were working so hard to get rid of knew about your children. He knew about you. It didn’t take you being decently smart to realize that Voldemort would eagerly kill both of the twins and yourself to get back at Regulus. Voldemort would take great pleasure in killing everything that Regulus loved the most before torturing him to the point of death.

“I can take some time away. I do love my job but this, us…our family is what matters to me. Regulus, is everything…”

Regulus quickly pulled you into a kiss. He had to stop you from saying “is everything going to be okay?” Regulus couldn’t even let himself begin to think of “what could happen.” He didn’t want to think about how he would handle being without you or his kids-to-be. Regulus would not let himself think about it…because it wasn’t going to happen. Again, Regulus knew how to kill people and he had no shame in doing it.

“Everything will be fine. I want you to just focus on being healthy…I’ll take care of anyone that tries anything whether it be little Peter Pettigrew or giant Malibu Barbie Lucius Malfoy. I’ve beaten them both up before and can do worse. You’re as good as my wife and I’ll never let anything happen to you.”

Regulus knew that you would worry. He knew it was stupid to tell you not to because he was going to be doing it too.

His eyes fell on the engagement ring on your finger. Regulus hadn’t even thought of the wedding. He had wanted to marry you before the babies were born or before Lucius Malfoy had a chance to run around and talk about “Regulus Black having bastard children with some whore.”

“We can still have the wedding that you want…we can do it now or later…I’m not changing my mind on you.”

You were quiet for a moment before stroking your fingers through Regulus’ curls.

“Maybe with it being a bad time is what will make it a good time. Molly said we could have it at their place. You know how pretty it is. It doesn’t have to be some queen’s grand roadshow of an event. It can be something small. Just our friends. I don’t think you want anything over the top and I personally don’t want that…all of those eyes on us..no thank you.”

You were relieved when Regulus smiled. He pulled gently pulled you back down for another kiss.

“That's why I love you”

_____

@amelie-black @jessyballet @knreidy1 @justfinishthis @acciosiriusblack @georgeweasleydumbhoe @siriuslyceleste @criminalyetminimal @mimisparkle12 @teletubiswszpilkach @livshifts @ell0ra-br3kk3r @stelleduarte @millies0bsimp @coffeeaddictednymph @readtomeregulus @rogue-nyx88 @panpride @saramaple @missgorldafirst @i-love-scott-mccall @s-we-e-t-t-ea @f4iryluvy @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @gugggu6gvai @buttercup-beeee @jag9000 @quinis @yousmellllikecaca @mentally-unstable-hoe @goldensunshineshit @aurorasnape12 @ad-astra-again @haroldpotterson @padf00ts-l0ver @rubyroscoe1 @spideyxalmighty @lucasfilms77 @marichromatic @ravenhood2792 @play-morezeppelin @dumybitch @lostarc24 @un-lovesherself @melaninnbarbie @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @moldy-old-boot @hankypranky @summer-novak @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @knight-of-gleefulness @deanwherescas @untoldshortsofthefandoms @shitfaceddaniel-blog @sprnaturallover @wontlookaway @li0nh34rt @tas898 @mycuddlycorner

[iwriteasfotini]

Jegulus Excerpt

My second Jegulus day celebration post. Another excerpt from Book 3, written from James’ POV. It stands alone from the excerpt I shared yesterday from Chapter VI and is from Chapter XX. I did have to edit out a few spoilers but the gist of the scene is there. More budding Starchaser for your entertainment. 

The terrace [atop the astronomy tower] was seemingly deserted, but as soon as they shut the door at the top of the tower, Regulus materialized, as if by magic. Which James realized was probably the literal case. 

“Cripes Reg, did you learn to aparate?” said Sirius, rubbing his forehead in an effort to look casual, though James had seen him jump upon Regulus’ sudden apparition. 

“No you moron, you can’t aparate or disparate within Hogwarts grounds. The wards prevent it.”

“Oh, well I thought you might have mastered more advanced magic while the rest of us were plowing on with our assigned studies.”

James had to hold back a snort, as Sirius didn’t know how spot on the nose he actually was in his assessment of Regulus’ magical skills. Regulus only scowled at him. 

“I’m surprised you are making it through your basic studies Sirius, as apparently your ability to read is now questionable,” Regulus said, nodding to James. “I said to come alone.”

“I’m not an idiot. I wasn’t going to march up here for a cozy brotherly one-on-one. Who knew what I would be walking into,” snarked Sirius. 

“Of course, I should have remembered it takes two Gryffindors to match up against a single Slytherin.”

Sirius rolled his shoulders. “What do you want Reg?”

And as James watched, Regulus dropped some of his standoffish posture. “Look, I really was counting on talking to you alone,” he said in a far more pleasant tone.

 “James is more my brother than you are, whatever you have to say you can say in front of both of us or not say at all.”

James met Regulus’ eyes, and was surprised when the other boy glanced away quickly, fidgeting with the hem of his sleeve. Regulus gave his head a shake then said, “fine. Mother has told me you will be home with us this summer.”

“So.”

“So… I want to warn you, don’t do anything brash. She is out to get you. She’s furious over your antics this year. Says you are wasting your potential as a Dark wizard, not to mention generally mucking up whatever you are getting involved in.”

(removed a LARGE chunk of text due to spoilers)

“Can’t wait to spend my summer locked up in the house with you Reggie,” Sirius said loudly. “You are a ray of pure sunshine. No wonder mum and papa fawn over you, and play you like a tune. You are their little prissy parrot of a prince. Whatever they say goes right?”

Sirius was continuing his sarcastic soliloquy but James was watching Regulus. As they stood there, a foot apart, Regulus’ angry face shifted, and his heart rate picked up under James’ hand. It was positively thrumming against his palm. And for a second Regulus wasn’t an annoying Slytherin with a manipulation complex. He was a little kid full of secrets, who was probably as lonely as Lily. 

However, the moment had lasted too long, for Regulus huffed, and pushed James’ arm down with his dagger free hand. 

James wasn’t deterred, and tried to communicate a lot of things without saying a word. (Removed some spoilers)

But he didn’t think Regulus got any of those messages. And when Regulus went to turn towards the parapets James’ hand darted forward to grab Regulus’. Regulus’ hand was frigid in his. He squeezed it quickly, but Regulus didn’t rip his hand out of James’ like James had expected him to. Instead his mouth fell open in surprise and he glanced up from under his long wavy fringe. 

“And what’s with that stupid dagger anyway. You think you can pull a knife on me and suddenly I’m your puppet to manipulate. Cousin Bella must be so proud you are showing interest in her perturbed methods of persuasion,” Sirius was rambling on and on. And though only a minute or so had passed, James felt he had been staring at Regulus for an hour, the boy’s cool fingers sending chills up his arm.  

Before Sirius could witness the strange display taking place between his best friend and his brother however, Regulus pulled away from James and finished turning his back on them. Then he suddenly announced, “I’ve said what I wanted to say, I’m going.” He pointedly stepped far to the side, avoiding bumping into James as he strode to the tower door. Sirius gazed after him. But James only had eyes for the ledge of the parapet, where a small crystal replica of a Lily sat. When James reached out to pick it up, he found it was made of ice. 

“What are you doing over there,” hissed Sirius. “Let’s get out of here. What a waste of time, as always.”

James held the small flower in his palm, and water immediately began to pool as his warm skin melted the miniature ice sculpture. 

“What do you have?” Sirius was right behind him, but James closed his hand and squeezed. Water ran through his fingers and dripped onto the stone floor. 

“Nothing.”

“Then get the cloak out and let’s go,” Sirius said, exasperated. 

James pulled the cloak out and passed it to Sirius, who threw it over them. By the time they made it to the bottom of the astronomy stairwell, James’ clenched fist was empty, but a throbbing cold lingered. 

…

You can find more info on this series in my pinned post. Unfortunately, this is from Book 3, which is fully written but doesn’t have an announced posting date as of yet. But it’s coming to AO3, I promise! On Sunday I'm announcing the title, POV, and posting date for Book 2 in my Weekly Update.

[jiliansky-blog]

I will find my way back to you. Chapter 12. I can feel

Pairing: Morpheus x FemaleReader

Rating: PG

Words: 2400

The next two days, they tried to find you the right dress and talk to you about what your meeting with Morpheus was going to be. They tried to make you irresistible. And you desperately wanted to be left alone.

Finally, you went to your room and took the medallion that Morpheus gave to you. Why don’t you feel anything? You recreated in your memory all the events that you shared. When he slipped into your dreams. When you met lately in the Dreaming. When you kissed. When he broke your heart, you decided to become a fairy to be with him.

And then you started to feel. You felt love for Morpheus and hurt and anger. You screamed because emotions flooded you. And you broke some things that made someone come to your room. Some fairies looked confused.

“Are you alright?” they asked.

“Yes,” you said politely, trying to stop your anger. “Just some things made me annoyed.”

“And you decide to break them?” the fairy asked suspiciously.

“Yes, problems?” You tried to mimic Cluracane’s annoyed intonation.

“None,” he said, and he disappeared.

You need to hide your feelings until you see Morpheus. God knows what Titania may do if she finds out that you have your emotions back. She can overplay everything.

And that leads you to another thought. She can stop if you want to leave with Morpheus after the wedding. You need to make something so she won’t do both of you any harm. And you remembered how the other day you saw the door to the Treasury. It was one of the few times when Cluracane was with you.

So you changed your dress and sneaked out of the room. You went through the corridors and tried to remember where the Treasury was. Also, you were trying to avoid other fairies. You were scared that they would close you up if they understood that you were planning something.

And finally, you found it. You opened the door, and no magic struck you. So you dared to take a few more steps. You decided to take something small with you. And then I saw a beautiful dagger decorated with stones. That would be perfect. It was made of steel. So you need to be careful with it. You used the part of your dress to take the dagger and hide it in the pocket of your dress. Even through the fabric, you felt it’s cold.

“I will not give you that,” you whispered, returning to your room

You couldn’t sleep that night. You recalled the sad expression of Morpheus when he realized that you had lost your emotions. One part of you was sad because he was hurt, and another felt revenge for your broken heart. But that feeling quickly faded. You didn’t want to hurt him, and you understood he was trying to protect you after the situation with Nada. And you missed him so much. You hope that he will come for you.

In the morning, Nuala came to your room. You already sat and looked out the window. But still, she felt something.

“You are deeper into your thoughts than usual,” she said.

“I am thinking about him,” you said.

“So…” she said carefully. “Did your feelings return?”

“You can say so,” you replied. “But you shouldn’t tell this to others. They can make other plans, and I am not ready for this.”

“I understand,” she nodded. “I won’t tell anyone.”

“Thank you,” you sighed. “I can’t thank you enough. And I don’t even know why you are helping me still.”

“Someone deserves happiness,” she replied.

That was enough for today. And she began to prepare me for engagement.

Morpheus

I dressed in a black suit, like the one I used to wear in the 18th century, and turned to Lucienne.

“I doubt something happens to me,” I said. “But I send Matthew if something goes wrong. And I won’t return without Y\N”.

“If you say so,” patiently replied the librarian.

“Are we ready to go?” asked Matthew.

“Yes.” I nodded, and we reappeared in the fairy realm. I hope she is going to go with me. Even if she doesn’t love me anymore.

Everything changed this time. Everything was decorated with flowers and bright ribbons. Like before the wedding. But that should be engagement, right?

“Lord Morpheus,” as the last time, Cluracane came to meet me. “You are just on time. She is almost ready.”

“Titania?” I asked.

“Our queen is ready to greet you,” he said. “I was talking about your beloved Y\N. Aren’t you here for her?”

I didn’t reply. He was trying to trigger my own emotions. I just looked at him and came to the castle. I hope she is waiting for me. But, of course, I saw Titania.

“Morpheus, I'm glad you came,” she smiled.

“What do you want from her?” I asked. “If you want to spite me, you need to do this with me. Not with her.”

“Spite you?” she said, looking offended. But I know that it was just pretending. “I want you to reunite. You want it too, don’t you?”

“You made her emotionless,” I said.

“Darling, we both know that we can’t predict how she will change,” she said. “But soon you will try to change her too.”

“I can only try to undo the damage you’ve caused her,” I replied.

“Don’t be like that,” she said. “She is immortal now. You have all the time to win her back. I know you’re good at that.”

“You’re really terrible,” I hissed.

“Oh, that’s where she is,” Titania replied.

And I saw her. Y\n was dressed in a beautiful white dress. She was again ethereal and beautiful as well. And she was looking at me. She wasn’t looking at anyone else. And it seemed to me that her eyes tried to tell me something.

“Lord Morpheus,” she whispered.

“Y\n, you are bewitching,” I whispered too.

“Thank you,” she smiled. “You are quite handsome too.”

And it sounds to me like her old self.

“And now, why don’t you dance a little before discussing our business?” asked Titania. “Relax, Morpheus, she is not going to disappear.”

“No, I want to know first what you are up to,” I said. I noticed that a fairy began to flood into the ballroom. And they were looking at us.

“Alright,” she sighed. “I want to unite our realms through the wedding. But I can’t marry you myself, you know.”

“So you decided to marry Y\N and make her your puppet?” I hissed.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” she replied. “She can tell her my wish and be free to go with you to the Dreaming. But sometimes she needs to return here.”

Y\N lowered her eyes. It was hard to tell what she was thinking about. But then she looked at the queen. She was very calm and stoic.

“I need to give you something,” she said. “As “thank you”.”

Y\n came closer, and then suddenly the dagger appeared in your hand, and you stroked Titania in the shoulder. The fairy queen screamed.

“You didn’t kill me, stupid girl,” Titania hissed.

“I didn’t try to,” you said calmly. “It was a warning for you to stay away from me and Morpheus and don’t mess with us.”

“You’ve got back your feelings,” she understood. “You are so ungrateful. I gave you immortality and a place among us.”

“You did that not because you were kind or wanted to help me, no,” you said. “But because you wanted to use me against Morpheus. And I was too sad to think clearly.”

You stepped back to Morpheus, and he took your hand silently. He was probably too shocked by your attitude.

“You will let us leave now,” you said.

“Or what?” asked Titania. She was totally pissed off. “One my word and you will never leave my realm. Especially you.”

“I will not agree,” suddenly Cluracane stepped up. “I’m sorry that Y\N couldn’t make it herself, so I finished."

And he took out the dagger and stroked the queen’s heart. There was a second common gasp. Now you were shocked too. Morpheus hugged you, and it felt like he wanted to protect you from what came next. Titania fell to the floor, and Cluracane looked at us.

“Long live the king,” he smirked.

“What…is going on?” you asked.

“Let’s go to some private place,” he said. “And talk.”

“What can we talk about?” said Morpheus coldly. “I’m going to take my…Y\N with me before you plan something else.”

“I swear I am up to no evil,” he said. “The party is still on. And you will want to listen to what I will tell you.”

“Come on,” you whispered. “We need to know at least an explanation.”

“He can trick us again,” he said, annoyed. “Do you really want to stay here and see what betrayal comes next?”

“No,” you confessed. “But I deserve some explanation of what just happened. I feel like I am a puppet in his puppet show.”

“Very well,” he agreed.

And you followed Cluracane to another room when he ordered you to serve the table with the food. Morpheus looked like he was going to snap.

“So what happened there?” you asked. “Did you plan this all along? With my hands?”

“Actually, yes,” he replied. “I would prefer you to kill the queen yourself, but this result is also good. Am I not a genius?”

“No, you played with me,” you said. “You made me do what you wanted. You are a manipulator.”

“Don’t be dramatic,” the fairy replied. “You are perfect now. You are a fairy, immortal, and can be with the love of your life.”

“But you have conditions,” Morpheus said.

“Yes, you can still can engage to make the deal,” he said. “I want us to be friends. Remember, I help you with it.”

“Morpheus’s gift helped me return my feelings,” you refused.

“Yes, but if not me, Titania would hide it somewhere in her treasury,” he said. “And your win would take longer.”

“Nuala gave it to me,” you said.

“Once again, I didn’t take it from her,” Cluracane replied. “And I told our former queen that I took it.”

“But why have you decided to kill her?” you asked.

“Her ruling is a bit old-fashioned,” he sighed. “Time came to the new ruler.”

“And now it will be you,” said Morpheus.

“It could be her, if she killed Titania,” the fairy replied. “But here we are. Now I leave. Enjoy the feast, you two.”

And he went away to talk to another fairy. You took the goblet of wine. Now, their wine shouldn’t affect you like it did before.

“Are you alright?” Morpheus asked, watching you eat.

“Do you still expect me to be emotionless?” you asked. “No, I’m fine. I'm just feeling a little bit weird. I’m getting used to this new state.”

“I’m glad,” he sighed.

“Morpheus, it’s really me,” you said, kissing his lips. “Relax a little bit. Do you know what else I want now?”

“I have no idea,” he whispered.

“I want to be alone with you and do more than talk,” you smiled. “I really missed you. After the ball, I felt emptiness inside of me.”

“I thought you didn’t feel anything,” he said.

“I felt the lack of feeling,” you replied. “I couldn’t even sleep.”

“Really?” He looked a little bit surprised.

“Yes, your sad face haunted me,” you smirked.

“Very funny,” he said, rolling his eyes, but then smiling. “I would like to be alone with you, too. And I was thinking about you all the time.”

“So, should we go?” you smiled.

“I can’t say no to you,” he smiled.

And then he let you take him to your room. He looks around, watching every item there. And then I looked at you.

“It doesn’t look like it's your room,” he said.

“Yeah, because they gave me back my stuff just recently,” you said. “Titania didn’t want me to have my memories.”

“I still can’t believe you did that,” Morpheus admitted. “No one has ever done this to me. You risked your entire life and being.”

“Because I love you,” you said, and he gasped. “Now I can say that without any risks. I would do that again.”

You kissed him. God, how much have you missed him? He embraced you like he was scared that you were going to disappear.

“I'm not worth it,” he whispered.

“I am going to be the judge of that,” you said. “I don’t want to lose you, love of my life, when I just find you.”

“You're an incredible and impossible human being,” he said softly.

“Not a human anymore,” you smiled and kissed him again.

He kissed you back like you were water, and he was thirsty for too long. But you were thirsty too, and he started to unbutton his shirt. He looked quite like a piece of cake in that suit. It took all the effort not to kiss the hell out of him right after you saw him.

“You are so impatient,” he smirked.

“Don’t tell me you don’t want it,” you replied, kissing his neck.

“Were you always like this, or is this a result of you being a fairy?” he asked.

“I don’t know, but I would do this with you if not for this stupid rule,” you replied. “Maybe the atmosphere is appealing here.”

“Or the wine,” he admitted.

“So?” you kissed his neck. “We can do this now and in the Dreaming. Nothing or no one is going to stop us now.”

“Indeed,” Morpheus replied, and he kissed you hungrily again.

In a few minutes, you both were without clothes. He only left his gift on your neck.

“What?” you smirked. “Do you like it on me?”

“I like it very much,” he said, touching my skin. “I should give it to you earlier. Perhaps, it could help you.”

“Or they could take it away from me,” you said. “Don’t blame you any further. We can’t change anything, and I prefer it that way.”

Morpheus didn’t say anything, but he started to kiss your face, your neck, shoulders and body. Until your mind stopped working. He was quite a gentle lover for someone who kissed you with such hunger.

“You drive me crazy,” you confessed. “I couldn’t think about anything else. And I’m pretty sure all my subjects noticed.”

“They know about us, so it’s not a problem,” you said, kissed him again and then took him to your bed.

And you made love. Slowly, and then more passionately and faster. Until you forget where you are and who you are.

@shadowqueen1318 @mypsychoticlove @justathirstyhoe​ @ladymoztaza @sapphireonline @deniixlovezelda

[tessa-liam]

King Liam Appreciation Week

Day 2: King/Historian

For my submission, I wrote a story combining King Liam's love of history and his love for his MC.

Featuring my OTP Liam and Riley, using the face claims of Lucas Bravo for Liam and Lorena Tarantino for Riley.

(Re-posting, tumblr being annoying forgetting the link!)

Cappadocia 

Book: The Royal Heir, Book 1 AU 👑One-Shot 

Premise: After Liam and Riley arrive home from their island paradise honeymoon, they are inundated with pressures to produce a Royal Heir. To protect and shield his bride, King Liam takes his queen away from the court and the press, as they embark on a trip to Cappadocia, Turkey. 

Pairing: Liam Rys x F!MC Riley Brooks-Rys, OTP ‘LiRi 

All characters belong to Pixelberry. 

Rating: M*Warnings: Adult conversation, sexual innuendo 

Category: One-Shot/fluff 

Words: 2174 

Music Inspiration: Wild Is the Wind, David Bowie 

A/N1: My submission for King Liam Appreciation Week, Day 2, April 18th – King/Historian, @kingliamappreciationweek @lizzybeth1986 @sazanes #kingliamappreciationweek #KLAW 

A/N2: Not beta’d - please excuse all errors. 

A/N3: My submission for Choices April Challenge, Prompts-Love is in the air, you are my home, sunrise, love, kiss, hug @aprilchallenge @peonierose @bebepac #choicesmonthlychallenge #Choices April Monthly Challenge 

A/N4: Please forgive the multiple postings...Tumblr is playing games again!

Cappadocia

King’s Study, Cordonian Palace 

Bright rays of light streamed through the bay windows as Liam sat down at his desk to open and review the mail he received while away on his honeymoon. 

Next to his ornate inbox on his desk, was the morning paper. 

He dropped the stack of correspondence he had just picked up back down as he read the bold lettering printed above the picture captured of the Royal couple leaving the jet as they arrived home. 

‘IS OUR HEIR HOME?’ 

‘KING LIAM SMILES WIDELY ARRIVING WITH HIS QUEEN.’ 

*** 

Reclining his chair, his thoughts went back in time to just four weeks ago... 

...it all started on their honeymoon, when Javier knocked the spoon of amuse bouche, having raw fish, out of Riley’s hand. Giving his apologies, ‘To have almost destroyed Cordonia’s future’, he assumed that Riley was pregnant. 

Taking it in stride, they laughed together as if nothing had happened, and continued with a leisurely dinner. 

...and then the intrusion of camera flashes, unknown at the time, were from unwelcome and uninvited paparazzi that were invading their privacy. It wasn’t until they arrived home and read the articles written about them and seen the pictures in the tabloids, did they realize how truly intrusive those cameras had been. 

...and on the last night on the island being told that the King and Queen of Auvernal arrived uninvited, wanting ‘to discuss the issue of his heir’.  

Arriving home with ‘a massive crowd of citizens and paparazzi’ waiting at Valtoria, which was to be expected. 

Yes, it was a normal occurrence for me, but for Riley, it was a new reality. A world she had never personally experienced before. 

My Queen won the hearts of our people and answered their questions with confidence and grace, despite the audacity of the press. 

As we entered the estate, however, the intrusive remarks by members of the court were even more personal and direct. 

...and then there was Madeleine. She was not only rude, but also snide and sarcastic. 

Liam’s thoughts were interrupted by a light knocking on the door of his study. 

“Come,” he said without looking up from his desk. 

Opening the door slowly, Riley stepped inside quietly closing the door behind her. 

“I hope I am not interrupting...” she began to say hesitantly. 

“Riley, my love, come here.” He smiled warmly as he stood and quickly moved around his desk. Taking her into his arms, “you are always welcome here, anytime.” 

“Hi Liam,” Riley smiles coyly, wrapping her arms around his neck.  

Breathing in her sweet smelling hair, Liam placed his hand on her neck and tilted her head up to capture a not so innocent kiss on her lips. 

After a few long seconds of exchanging passionate kisses, Liam pulled away, and gently caressed her cheek. 

“What would you say if I told you that we are going on an adventure this weekend?"  

A broad smile spread across her face, and she looked up at him in anticipation. 

“I would say, ‘when do we leave?’” 

Chuckling, Liam took her hand and led her to sit on the sofa by the bay window. 

Sitting down in a wingback chair directly across from Riley, Liam said, 

“‘What we need is space to ourselves.’ We have been home for a day and a half, and I think we need a distraction.” 

Riley giggled, "Oh, my King, that look in your eye tells me that you thought of something spectacular!" 

“Yes, My Queen, Indeed I did," he smiled widely. 

Laughing, Liam reached over and pulled her onto his lap, and gave her another kiss. 

"How does riding in a hot air balloon at sunrise over vast valleys sound? Or staying at a luxury hotel inside of a cave within a sandstone cliff?” 

“Oh my, yes! That sounds amazing!” 

“Good, because that is exactly what I have planned for us this upcoming week,” he said with a twinkle in his eyes. 

"Love, we are going to Cappadocia, Turkey.” 

“Really? I thought we were going on a road trip in the U.S. with Hana, Maxwell and Drake?” Riley questioned, raising her eyebrow. 

“Don’t worry we will still arrive on Texas in time for Bertrand and Savannah’s wedding. But, instead of sharing time with our friends, I decree, my queen needs pampering.” 

*** 

Royal Jet, on the tarmac 

Aboard the Royal jet, Riley was settling into her seat as Liam discussed the flight plans with the pilot before take-off. 

“Your majesty, the flight will take approximately three hours, and we should be arriving in Cappadocia shortly after.” 

“Thank you, Captain,” Liam replied. 

Turning to Riley, “It seems like our adventure is just about ready to start.” 

Bastien and Mara were just entering the cabin, taking their seats behind the Royal couple as the sound of the engines increased in sound. 

As the jet lifted off the tarmac, Liam squeezed Riley’s hand. 

“We are going to see a part of the world that most people have never been to before. We’re going to experience things that very few people ever get to enjoy. And, most importantly, we are going to spend time away from court.” 

“Madeleine, Godfrey, and our royal visitors are going to revolt. When they find out we left the Capital, they...” 

“Riley, you forget something very, very important. You are my Queen now. Our word is law in Cordonia. As far as Bradshaw, Isabella and Amalas are concerned, they are uninvited guests and do not dictate our schedules. The reason there is a Royal council is to support the Crown in whatever the Queen and King decides.” 

“I’m sorry, Liam, I shouldn’t worry about everyone else.” 

Smiling, Liam kissed her hand, “It’s just one of your qualities that I love so much. Sometimes you must let go of the reins otherwise you’ll drive yourself crazy. Okay?” 

Grinning and nodding her head, Riley asked, “now, tell me more about this trip; what do you have in-store for us?” 

“Well, once we arrive in Cappadocia, we are going to travel to a town called Goreme. That is where the hotel we are staying at is situated. It’s just outside of Goreme. The entire town is built into the side of a mountain, with many caves that are used for living quarters by locals.” 

“It sounds amazing!” 

“There are several other villages near Goreme, including Selime and Nevsehir. All of them are lush and green, especially during the spring season. There are hot springs that we can enjoy, as well as several museums and ruins that we will visit. The area is rich in history, as well as culture.” 

“Oh Liam, it sounds incredible.” 

“Yes, it is. Now, I want you to relax and let me plan everything. I know how much you love surprises, and I don’t intend to disappoint.” 

With a wink, Liam added, “and, we will have lots of opportunities to work on our family.” 

*** 

When they landed in Cappadocia, a large white Mercedes SUV was waiting to escort them to their hotel in Goreme. 

As they travelled, Liam explained the local landscapes, including the tall, cone shaped rock formations known as ‘fairy chimneys’. “These were formed 60 million years ago after a sequence of volcanic eruptions hit the area. 

The name ‘Cappadocia’ is derived from the Persian word, ‘Katpatuka’, meaning the land of beautiful horses. In ancient times, gifts or tributes of horses from this region were presented to ancient Assyrian and Persian kings.” 

“It sounds like horses were paid for taxes to the crown,” Riley replied.  

“Yes, in fact the locals here still value horses and offer visitors an alternate mode of transport, instead of motor vehicles.” 

Liam directed the driver to slow down as they travelled by the rock cut churches. “They say that these churches number up to 600, and there is a possibility that many are yet to be discovered. The chapels were carved into the soft rock by monks in the dark ages, and some of them have kept their original impressive frescoes with amazing detail. 

Superstitious locals scratched out the eyes of some of the figures due to the fear of the ‘evil eye’.” 

“Well, we can check it out tomorrow morning after our balloon cruise.” 

Kayakapi Premium Caves Hotel 

After checking in, they were personally ushered to their penthouse suite by the resort chamberlain.  

“Your Majesties, this hotel is set inside 8 original fairy chimneys and has an indoor pool that resembles an ancient Roman bathhouse and spa.” 

Liam squeezed Riley’s hand, pulling her close to his side. 

Continuing, the chamberlain pointed out the traditional artifacts and artwork throughout the hotel as they walked passing by the sunrise balloon viewing terrace. 

Arriving inside their penthouse suite, Liam chuckled watching Riley’s jaw drop. 

“You didn’t tell me there was a pool.... inside our suite!” 

“Of course not,” Liam said with a laugh. 

Laughing, she smacked him playfully on the arm. 

“No, you did not.” 

“Oh good.” 

Liam set her down on the edge of the pool, then poured two flutes of champagne and handed one to her. 

“To our new life together,” clinking their crystal flutes. 

Taking a sip of champagne, Riley held her flute up, “to riding the skies tomorrow.” 

Liam raised his flute and added, 

“Because at sunrise we will be on a hot air balloon ride, for the absolute best view of the region in all its glory.” 

*** 

“Love is in the air”  

“OH. MY. GOD. I feel like we are flying over the moon!’ 

As Liam stepped up behind Riley, he wrapped his arms around her waist in a hug and placed a soft kiss on her neck. 

“Hidden beneath the landscape are over 50 underground cities. An interesting fact is that these cities held all the necessary facilities to lead an everyday life. These cities had everything a typical town would have, from wine presses to cooking places, oil storage, and livestock pens. These cities served as a safe space for Christians escaping persecution by Arabs. 

In fact, the name ‘Goreme’ means ‘one cannot see in here’.” 

Leaning back against him. She rested her head on his shoulder. 

“I love you,” he whispered. 

“I love you, too,” she murmured. 

Looking over her shoulder at Liam, “this place is amazing!” 

Gazing at the ancient rock formations rising from the ground like castles and churches, Liam smiled. 

“It certainly is. I had no idea that these places existed until a few months ago.” 

“This is so beautiful,” Riley said, looking around the stunning landscape below. 

“Indeed, it is.” 

*** 

Royal jet, en route to the U.S. 

Riley awoke from a nap due to turbulence. She sat up in her seat and reached for Liam’s hand. 

“What is it? Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine, the air turbulence is getting to me.” 

Lifting her hand to his lips, he gave her a gentle kiss. 

Riley felt her stomach turn, and she took a breath. 

Moving closer, Liam stroked her cheek. 

“Are you sure? You look pale.” 

“Thank you so much for taking me on this trip.” Riley was clearly getting emotional. “I love you so much.” 

Reaching over, he brushed aside her hair, kissing the top of her 

Forehead. 

“As soon as the wedding is over, I will take you home.” Riley looked up at her husband, “I am already home.... “You are my home.”   

My OTP Liam & Riley, LiRi

Face claims: Lucas Bravo & Lorena Tarantino

@sazanes + @lizzybeth1986, Thank you for hosting @kingliamappreciationweek 💕💕💕

My tag list: @tinkie1973 @emkay512 @malblk21 @imjusthereforliam @lovingchoices14 @kyra75 @kingliam2019 @karahalloway @busywoman @alj4890 @differenttyphoonwerewolf @harleybeaumont @twinkleallnight @xpandass420x-deactivated2023032 @sfb123 @ao719 @txemrn @queenmiarys @jared2612 @thesvnsins @irisk12 @walkerdrakewalker @charlotteg234 @choicesficwriterscreations @choicesmonthlychallenge