#and i want to expand my teaching experience

[sexysilverstrider]

i. want to work abroad.

[britneyshakespeare]

This is just a map of New England (minus Connecticut the fake New England state)

[mythalism]

sick to my stomach when i think about how clearly inquisition set up a major worldview shattering revelation regarding the personhood of spirits and how they have been dehumanized for millennia and framed by thedas' major political and cultural institutions as worthless, soulless evil demons that everyone should fear and revile. but then inquisition, through cole's story and through solas's dialogue, asks: what makes a person? what does it mean to be a person? are you willing to expand your definition? or will you shut out any being that seems strange, confusing, or unknown to you? we were taught that demons take over bodies because they want to join the physical world, that they are jealous of the spark of humanity and want it for themselves. solas confirms that spirits are drawn through the rifts in the veil due to their wish to join the living, they want to experience life, and are corrupted by the shock of the change. jaws of hakkon presents us an alternative to the spirit-fearing chantry ideology; the avaar live in peace with spirits alongside them. it leads right into the reveal of the titans as incomprehensible, alien, almost eldritch being beyond understanding: what about them? if you accepted spirits as people, will you accept these beings too?

trespasser then explains why spirits have such a desire to be with the world, because they are not supposed to be separate. they are not jealous, as the chantry teaches, but trying to unite with a half of the world that was lost. veilguard continues the message - some ways more artfully than others. spirits became the first elves, there is little argument against spirit personhood now. the mourn watch, in all of their ret-conned glory, treat spirits as beloved friends and coworkers and adopted children. rivaini seers chat with spirits regularly. its unambiguous now. spirits are people. the chantry's dehumanization efforts are wrong. we should do something about it, right? theres someone who has experienced the corruption and dehumanization of spirits firsthand? first used as a tool and then demonized beyond recognition? who wants to fix the hostile environment that leads to the constant corruption of spirits into demons? we should want that, right? nope! its ok. just leave them! they are indeed people but who cares :)

[kacievvbbbb]

So the thing is; I don’t think Yuri has like a loli con sister fetish thing going on. As fun as it is to shit on him for it and as weird as it is sometimes I think he just loves her and because he probably has no/very little memory of his parents and he’s definitely never had a romantic relationship in his life the only person in his life that he loves is his sister and so my take is that his brain never actually learnt to differentiate between all the different kinds of love you can have for people.

Like ofcourse objectively he knows the difference between romantic love and platonic but also Yuri at times is still mentally at the childhood phase of I love my mom and I’m going to marry her because I love her so much and that’s apparently what you do when you love someone.

Because honestly if he really was weirdly romantically in love with Yor I don’t think Anya would bother him so much but like hes just as jealous of Anya as he is of Loid which would just not be the case if he actually knew how to differentiate between all the different kinds of love. If he really was romantically attracted to yor I think he’d make a bit of a bigger show to show how “fatherly” he could be (even tho she’s technically Loid’s child)

Yuri just really loves his sister like when little kids have feelings that are too big for them to understand or to explain or do anything other than experience them at full intensity. There is no one else hes allowed himself to share his life with in anyway. He has no real friends no parents or parental figures and he has no partner he literally only has his sister she’s his entire life.

And yor was kind of like that too in the beginning; wrapped up in Yuri. everything she did was to ensure Yuri didn’t worry it wasnt as intense as Yuri’s cause Yor’s not as single minded but like look at them in the last chapter Yor actually sets and enforces strict boundaries on Yuri and how he can talk about her family when just a couple chapters ago she let him talk smack about her fake marriage and fake husband in her living room and everything was an act to prove to yuri it wasnt “real” not really. But now Yor has grown she has let other people into her life it’s bigger and it’s settled in away that Yuri can’t push back against. And just like she’s always done as his big sister she is teaching him, modeling for him how to open up his life, how they can expand to include other people in this little world of theirs and they will still have space for each other that they’ll still have love for each other.

And yuri’s first instinct is to make their world small again to make it safe take them back to when it was just them so he can protect himself protect the space he occupies in Yor’s life. until he realizes that’s not making the world safe hes just sealing them in an airtight jar. And then he lets go as much as he can anyway even tho it’s just a few centimeters. He calms down and he goes home and I think the fact that he didn’t just stay home eating food that reminded him of his childhood of Yor instead he accepts the invitation, it’s why Chloe and his first commander are so important he letting his world expand just a little bit. That he gets the little sheets Yor wanted to get for Anya. It’s proof it’s all proof that Yuri’s growing up. Hes learning to let the life in.

He’s still very much a weird little guy though

[astrologydray]

Ruler of the 9th through the houses

The 9th house is expansion, belief, wisdom, and the journey of becoming. When you trace the ruler of the 9th house through the chart, you find your unique source of growth, truth, spiritual path, worldview, and even how life calls you beyond your comfort zone. “Where does life want to grow me up? “How do I seek purpose, higher truth, or a bigger story?”

9th House Ruler in the 1st House

Your whole life is a quest for meaning.

You embody the philosopher vibe. Travel, learning, and spiritual experiences shape your identity. People may see you as wise beyond your years — or a natural guide/teacher. You expand through: Personal experience, self-expression, walking your truth. Thinking you have all the answers is your shadow side. “I am the journey.”

9th House Ruler in the 2nd House

You want truth you can touch.

Your values and beliefs are deeply tied — you don’t just talk the talk, you live it. You may be drawn to spiritual or educational paths that offer material grounding or security. You expand through: Building, earning, practicing what you preach. Limiting beliefs about worth or abundance can be an issue. “What I believe shapes what I receive.”

9th House Ruler in the 3rd House

You’re a translator of wisdom.

You take big ideas and make them digestible. You learn and teach through conversation, writing, and sharing. You’re curious and constantly expanding your mind. You expand through: Language, storytelling, community dialogue. Can have Scattered thinking or dogmatic opinions. “Truth lives in everyday conversations.”

9th House Ruler in the 4th House

Home is a spiritual journey.

Your roots, ancestors, and emotional patterns shape your beliefs. You may have grown up with strong cultural or religious influences — or find personal expansion through inner emotional work. You expand through: Emotional safety, healing the past, honoring your lineage. Clinging to inherited belief systems is something to let go of! “My truth begins at home.”

9th House Ruler in the 5th House

Your joy is your philosophy.

You believe in creative self-expression, love, and the magic of play. Romance, art, and fun may open your mind and heart to deeper truth. You’re here to teach through your passions. You expand through: Love, art, performance, romantic adventure. Needing attention or validation for your ideas can be frequent.“I believe in joy as a sacred act.”

9th House Ruler in the 6th House

You live your truth through service.

You integrate your beliefs into your daily life. Spirituality isn’t abstract to you — it’s in your routines, your work, your rituals. You may be called to healing or service professions. You expand through: Practical action, consistency, showing up. Can be prone to Self-sacrificing or rigid thinking around “doing it right”. “Every day is sacred when done with purpose.”

9th House Ruler in the 7th House

Relationships are your gateway to growth.

You attract partners who expand your mind or worldview — sometimes from different cultures, beliefs, or life paths. One-on-one connection teaches you the most. You expand through: Partnerships, reflection, shared beliefs. Giving power to others’ philosophies. “Our connection teaches me who I am.”

9th House Ruler in the 8th House

Your beliefs are born from transformation.

You don’t do surface-level spirituality — you want depth, truth, and emotional alchemy. You may explore taboo or mystical paths, and your purpose often rises from personal rebirth. You expand through: Shadow work, intimacy, spiritual death + rebirth. Obsessing over finding the “ultimate truth”. “I go deep to rise higher.”

9th House Ruler in the 9th House

You’re the archetypal seeker.

You were born to explore truth, culture, philosophy, or spirituality in a BIG way. Travel, teaching, publishing, or guiding others may be part of your soul path. You expand through: Faith, freedom, learning, exploring. Arrogance, superiority, or escapism. “Life itself is my university.”

9th House Ruler in the 10th House

Your purpose is to live your truth publicly.

Your beliefs shape your career and legacy. You may be known as a teacher, speaker, guide, or leader in your field. What you stand for is part of your reputation. You expand through: Ambition, impact, visibility. Performing your truth for clout. “My truth is my mission.”

9th House Ruler in the 11th House

You believe in the future.

Your soul seeks expansion through community, causes, and collective vision. You may feel called to progressive movements, teaching groups, or spreading truth via tech or networks. You expand through: Social impact, innovation, collective dreaming. Losing individual belief in groupthink. “My vision isn’t just mine — it’s ours.”

9th House Ruler in the 12th House

Your truth is cosmic.

You’re tapped into divine, mystical, or dream realms. Your beliefs may be hard to articulate — they’re felt more than taught. Spiritual solitude is your sacred teacher. You expand through: Surrender, inner knowing, spiritual devotion. Escaping reality or spiritual bypassing. “I believe in what can’t be seen.”

[fishnapple]

What new skill should you learn

This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.

Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐

About me | Masterpost Book a reading with me - KO-FI (→ personal reading)

CARNELIAN

The most prominent one that I get is public speaking skills. Your usual way of speaking might not get you enough attention when you are in front of a crowd or talking to a large audience, even online one. May be your voice is too soft or sounds quite young or bubbly, or you don't like to share too much about yourself, your opinions. It can make you seem more approachable, but in situations that you need to assert yourself, to be taken seriously, then it can become a disadvantage. And when you are in those situations, you might over compensate by being defensive or rigid, trying to assert yourself more than necessary.

You need to develop a firmer tone, and the words you say, your body language should also convey a sense of authority. But it's not a battle for power and domination, you just need to make yourself more visible, to make your energy more solid and grounded. This will help you in situations that require exchanging ideas in a large group, delivering your message to many people, rallying, persuading, teaching, or simply telling a story.

Research more about social skills in a group setting, observe the people that you feel are popular or well respected, observe their body language, their posture, their tones in different kinds of conversations, their choices of words, their silence, etc. This may sound mechanical but if you treat this skill just like math or painting, instead of thinking that social skill is something innate, you will see that with appropriate observations and enough practice, you can achieve a certain level of proficiency. This will open more opportunities for you and raise your confidence.

CLEAR QUARTZ

The stone of Pluto, South node and North node, all are "standing up", they are trying to make a statement (each side of the crystal is very narrow, it can fall over with just a gust of wind, I normally couldn't replicate the same position). The theme is about changing the old and embracing a new mindset. I think it has to do with how you take care of your appearance, your style.

Right now, you seem to be staying in the safe zone when it comes to styling yourself, making yourself more beautiful. This might be due to restrictions in early childhood, traditional values, what society deems appropriate or trendy. You might not want to focus too much on appearance because it seems superficial or vain, or takes too much of your time and energy.

But doing so will rope you the chance to express yourself more truthfully. Beautify yourself not because of how you will be perceived, but because it's a way to show love for yourself. You look into a mirror, you feel happy, you want to compliment yourself, you feel that silly stray strand of hair is adorable, not thinking about how will everyone say, how you are not like someone.

So the advice for you here is to be more adventurous in styling, expand your knowledge about fashion and styling, explore yourself more , give yourself the freedom to experiment more, to rebel more. Creating a unique image, a "public persona" is not just for some celebrities, everyone can benefit from that. Because behind that seemingly surface action, is the journey of discovering your deeper self. As within so without.

The theme of transformation is also applied to learning new languages. The languages should be totally different from your mother tongue, giving you more chance to connect with people from various parts of the world.

OBSIDIAN

The phrase "navigating the world" appeared in my mind. I got several meanings from this. One is in the literal sense as driving a vehicle, going around, navigating the roads, so learning to drive a new kind of vehicle might be the skill you should learn, or even learn to swim or row a boat. There are lots of movements, travelling and moving around. You should be more active in the physical sense. But this is not really about exercise or going to the gym, it's about moving your body, being in various places, experiencing different things. Your life in this period needs lots of expansion and movements. You might feel that you don't have enough resources or energy to go on trips, or you're simply someone who doesn't like travelling. But it will make your life stagnant. Travelling might not seem like a skill, but it is, all the planning, packing, preparation and the ability to adapt to the new place, all or these take skills.

Another one is navigating the complicated social construct. Maybe you feel it's hard to connect to people, there might be walls and the feeling of solitude and not fitting in, that there is something fundamentally different about you. The people that you managed to get closer to (it's likely that they approached you first) will stay close to you for a long time, you have no trouble maintaining a connection. The trouble lies in initiating or forming the connection. There might be an ego here that doesn't want to show their vulnerable side. Silly jokes and banters might seem childish to you. But learning to have fun in a social setting is much more rewarding than you think. Allow yourself to be a child, learn how to tell a story. Debating skills might also be worthwhile for you to learn, learn how to state your opinions clearly and defend your stance.

This group is strangely hard to read, I feel a certain resistance. You might feel that your personality isn't suitable for these kinds of things or you think it would take too much effort and work. You also don't want to imitate what other people are doing. Another reason might be that you haven't figured out what you like to do yet. But that's okay, everything takes time, trials and errors are normal, don't give up on the first try.

TIGER'S EYE

This one is an anti-consumerism movement. You might want to learn how to mend and sew clothes. And not just learn for yourself, but later will you spread the awareness to everyone, or even open workshops related to this.

Running after trends, constantly being bombarded by ads about shiny things that we don't actually need. Basic clothes with good quality cost too much while trendy ones don't last for more than a year. Maybe it's time for you to take matters in your own hands. Learning how to sew clothes might take time and effort, and sometimes, the cost is not small either. But you will be more free to explore styles that you like, create things that you're actually comfortable in. Not many people can proudly display their achievements like someone who makes their own clothes. This is also a great activity to relieve stress and help you practice being patient, especially if you're someone who is quick to get irritated or not very meticulous. It can soften your energy more and make it more focused.

Another way to practice is martial art or self-defense. You have lots of energy that needs to be channelled into various activities, those that keep your body busy.

You might also want to research more about the traditional spiritual and occult practices of your culture, or some traditional crafts in your family, learning about the legacy of our ancestors. There will be surprising knowledge hidden in them that you didn't notice before. You could feel resistant or disagree with many traditional teachings but don't disregard them completely. We can always learn something new from the old and the new always contain the old.

LABRADORITE

This is something that you feel out of your depth and uncomfortable doing, or something that you like but want to keep it a secret, for fear of judgement or obstruction.

I heard dancing and singing. But there's a feeling of gatekeeping. Some people consider these kinds of activities only for those who are gifted and have the resources to pursue them. These skills are put on a pedestal that stops people from approaching them in a more casual way.

Why should you learn these skills? It's to let your inner child be free and out into the open. It's also a way to learn how to control your body, discipline it so it can flow freely, it helps you connect more with your sensuality. Our body is an instrument of life, capable of many miracles, you won't know it unless you let it interact and move with the world around it.

There are various genres for you to explore, but I see traditional instruments or movements combined with modern ones.

Nurturing life such as gardening is another skill you should learn. It helps you be more in sync with nature, you will need to observe the natural cycle of life, to care for each individual and to form a bond with them. If you don't have the space or resources for gardening, maybe try to study more about nature, subjects about biology and chemistry, the ecosystem of forests, oceans, deserts etc. You will be more appreciative of the nature world.

CITRINE

Your energy right now seems to be rigid and doesn't flow properly. There's stress about your health, it's hard to relax, you don't feel comfortable in your body. Maybe you've been too busy lately, your mind is overloaded and your movement is restricted. So you need to learn something that can help you destress, loosen up the hard restrictions around you, and connect more with a softer, more gentle energy. You could call it your feminine energy, regardless of your gender. The feminine energy is within all of us, in your case, it's more hidden. Your loving, more nurturing side could be considered as weaknesses by the people around you. Or, on the contrary, those traits are expected of you forcefully, to the point that your own interpretation of them are buried deep within, you haven't had a chance to actually understand and connect with it.

I think meditation or any form of practice that can quiet the mind and put you in the flow will be good for you. Making art could be one form of it, yoga, intuitive dancing, Qigong, roller skating. Slow, mindful movements or wild, frantic ones just like a child running around, all the while maintaining your balance. You can temporarily forget about yourself, your worries, your responsibilities for a while with these kinds of activities.

Learning to play an instrument can also achieve the same kind of effects. A flute or a lyre.

You should be around children more, learn how to take care of them, how to teach them. Working, being with children can have a totally different energy and requires a different set of skills. I think you would make a great teacher because you have a very protective energy that children would feel safe around you. And in turn, they help you soften up and bring out your compassionate side more.

[noir-lullaby]

Love is Blind | Terry Richmond

Summary: Falling in love without seeing each other was the easy part. But when the doors open and you finally lay eyes on Terry Richmond, you realise this isn't just an experiment anymore. It's real.

Warnings: pure fluff.

Author’s Note: Y’all, Terry Richmond on Love Is Blind was not on my bingo card, but here we are! 😭 I had so much fun writing this.

Word Count: ~2,800 words

The moment you signed up for Love Is Blind, you told yourself you weren’t going to settle. No half-hearted connections, no forcing sparks that weren’t there. You wanted something real. And yet, sitting on this couch in the pod, you found yourself falling. Hard.

His voice was deep, steady, a soothing kind of rich that made you lean in closer to the wall that separated you. There was a quiet strength to the way he spoke, an intentionality behind every word. He listened to you—not just hearing, but truly absorbing everything you said.

“So you really teach second grade?” Terry asked, a smile evident in his tone.

“Mhm, going on five years now. They keep me on my toes, but I love it. It’s beautiful seeing their minds expand, especially our little Black and brown babies. I want them to see the world as big as they want it to be.”

Terry hummed, a thoughtful pause before he responded. “That’s dope. I respect that.”

You grinned. “And you? A former Marine?”

“Yeah. Did my time, but I knew early on I wasn’t staying in forever. Too much blind loyalty, y’know? And I ain’t with all that.”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you. “I won’t lie, I’ve always had complicated feelings about the military.”

“How so?”

You exhaled, choosing your words carefully. “I get why people serve. I really do. But it’s hard knowing how much harm our government has done, especially to people who look like us. I could never put my life on the line for a country that’s never fully protected us.”

Terry was quiet for a beat before he spoke, voice even. “I hear you. And honestly? I don’t disagree. I enlisted ‘cause I needed stability. Wanted to make sure my family was good. But the deeper I got into it, the more I saw the cracks. So I left.”

You bit your lip, thinking. “Do you regret it?”

“Nah. It made me who I am, but it don’t define me. I’m more than that.”

Something in your chest warmed at that. You liked the way he saw himself, how he wasn’t confined to one experience, one box. It made you want to know more.

Days turned into weeks, and with every conversation, the connection deepened. You spoke about everything—the best soul food spots, your love for old-school R&B, the books that changed your lives. Be still, your heart.

The laughter, the teasing, the little moments of vulnerability—it all built to this moment.

“I know this might be crazy,” Terry started, voice lower now, like he was holding his breath. “But I can’t ignore what I feel for you. I don’t need to see your face to know I wanna build something real with you.”

Your heart pounded. You had dreamed of this moment, but with him, it felt different. It felt right.

“Terry,” you whispered, emotion thick in your throat.

“Will you marry me?”

Tears pricked at your eyes, the answer already there. “Yes.”

--

The night before the reveal, you barely slept. Your mind raced with excitement, nerves, and the tiniest sliver of doubt. What if he wasn’t attracted to you? What if the chemistry fizzled when you were face to face? But deep down, you knew it wasn’t just about looks. You had fallen for his mind, his heart, the way he made you feel safe without even seeing you.

And then, the moment came.

Standing behind the doors, your hands trembled. This was it. The moment you would finally see him, no walls, no barriers. Just you and him.

The doors opened, and your breath hitched.

Terry Richmond stood there, tall and strong, blue-grey eyes locked onto you with an intensity that made your stomach flip. He was beautiful, and the way his lips parted in awe made you feel like the most radiant woman in the world.

“Damn,” he exhaled, running a hand over his goatee. “You’re even more beautiful than I imagined.”

You let out a soft laugh, stepping forward as he pulled you into his arms. The embrace was firm, secure, like home. He smelled of cedarwood and something distinctly him, and when he pulled back just enough to look at you, there was nothing but warmth in his gaze.

“We really did this, huh?” you murmured, fingers tracing the lapels of his suit.

“Yeah, we did,” he said, voice full of certainty. “And I ain’t letting go.”

Neither were you.

You couldn’t stop staring at him, drinking in every detail—his strong jawline, the faint scar on his brow, the way his hands held yours like he was afraid to let go. “I was scared,” you admitted. “That maybe this connection wouldn’t feel as real in person. But looking at you now? I’ve never been more sure.”

Terry cupped your cheek, thumb grazing your skin gently. “I know what you mean. But I felt you before I saw you. And now that I see you?” He leaned in, voice low and reverent. “I ain’t going nowhere.”

Before you could overthink it, his lips captured yours in a slow, deep kiss. The world around you faded, cameras and crew slipping into nothingness as you melted into him. His hands anchored you, fingers pressing into the small of your back as he deepened the kiss, taking his time like he wanted to memorize the way you tasted. Your arms looped around his neck, holding him close, needing him closer. It was soft and urgent all at once, a promise sealed between you.

When you finally pulled away, breathless, he pressed his forehead against yours, a small smirk on his lips. “Yeah,” he murmured. “This is real.”

The first few minutes together felt like a dream. The way he held your hand, the way he whispered little reassurances—You good? You nervous?—all of it made you melt. The cameras, the producers, all faded into the background. It was just the two of you.

“So… what now, fiancée?” he teased, smirking as he twirled your fingers between his own.

You laughed, tilting your head. “I guess we get ready for the real world.”

“Think we’ll survive?” he asked, half-joking, half-serious.

You squeezed his hand. “As long as you’re in it, I’m ready.”

Terry studied you for a long moment, like he was committing every detail of your face to memory. Then, with a slow, confident nod, he smiled. “Then let’s do this, baby.”

And for the first time in a long time, you felt completely, undeniably, ready too.

taglist: @nayaesworld @slvt4her @novahreign @nbanenefrmdao @kaylalb @woahthatshitfat

[bloodstainedsapphic]

guitar teacher!ellie x smartass!reader thank you for all the meet-cute requests @thatdammchickennugget -- they are my absolute favorite and this one is a classic. i plopped a lot of my real life into this lmao. i kinda wanna do a spicy part 2 here. idk. we'll see!

you wait with bated breath inside the cramped, soundproof lesson room at your local music store, where you signed up on a whim to learn the guitar. it’s an impulse decision, really—all but doomed to be just another tick off the ever-expanding list of random cool skills you’ve tried. at the very least, you hope maybe you can whip this one out to “impress the ladies.” maybe even serenade them with some songs and actually sound good doing it—lord knows many have endured the clunky chords of a red hot chili peppers song from some mediocre man already.

you clutch your new guitar semi-awkwardly, plucking the strings and lightly tapping the cool basswood. you can tell that the tune is off, but damn if you know how to fix it. you wonder if you’ll abandon it after the first 40 minutes, just like most other hobbies you’ve sampled.

in your hasty decision-making, you hadn’t even requested a specific teacher. you’d only ever seen middle-aged men employed here, which is fine. you trust their experience, picturing some warm-hearted old rocker coming in and showing off his tried-and-true tricks. what you don’t expect, then, is when the door opens and a girl your age enters the room, extending her hand to shake yours.

“hi, my name is ellie. you’re the one here to learn guitar, right?”

you shake her hand, eyes glancing over her form, trying not to seem like a dumbfounded creep. jeez, she’s cute. she has reddish-brown hair in a choppy bob, freckled cheeks, green eyes, and a dorky smile. she’s adorned in a faded blue jacket rolled up to her elbows, revealing arm tattoos, and a ragged t-shirt with a band you’ve never heard of. and this is the cutie who will watch you fiddle with out-of-tune strings and act like a complete dumbass? you half hope the ground will swallow you whole.

“yeah,” you manage to reply once you remember how to speak. “that’s me. word of warning: i really don’t know what i’m doing, so i’m, like, a total beginner.”

ellie chuckles reassuringly, likely having heard that tired statement a million times over. she gently picks the guitar up from your lap, inspecting its quality. of course, in her hands, the instrument looks like it was made to be held by her. “hey, that’s fine. everyone starts somewhere, right?” she gets to tuning the strings as naturally as breathing.

“so, what’s got you interested in learning?” ellie suddenly asks, just to fill the dense silence of the room. your mouth runs dry, struggling with a response that doesn’t sound as idiotic as “i’m an obnoxious flirt.” she catches onto your fumbling, adding, “what? wanting to look like a badass guitar god, hm?”

“calling yourself a badass, then?” the tongue-in-cheek question escapes before you can rein it in. ellie pauses her tuning to look up at you, and your heart drops to your stomach. she’s going to kick you out, you reckon.

“i mean… you are staring at me with your mouth open. must be in awe of my guitarist badassery or something. i don’t mind,” ellie replies with a knowing, smug smile, then returns to helping your sorry ass tune up your guitar.

yep, you definitely need that hole in the ground right now.

after that rocky introduction, the lesson takes on a more professional atmosphere, with ellie explaining the basics. she teaches you about the body of the instrument, the strings, and some basic history—you name it, and she knows it. it’s clear that ellie is enthusiastic about the guitar, her interest rubbing off on you, which does not help your case with how cute you already find her.

you try your best to be a good student, which isn’t the energy you typically bring to all your other short-lived courses. there is something special about ellie’s passion—how her lips move as she speaks about it, how her eyes light up, her fingers curling against the strings while demonstrating songs—it compels your attention. you listen respectfully to the multitude of rambles she embarks on and cuts short whenever ellie realizes she has led you too astray from the basics.

at approximately the 38th minute of the 40-minute lesson, you realize that you haven’t attempted to actually play the damn thing. ellie must have come to the same realization, flashing a tilted smile, hoping you aren’t too annoyed that this instructional course devolved into a ted talk, a worry she couldn’t possibly be more wrong about.

ellie assists your clumsy self in positioning the guitar onto your lap, showing you how to hold it correctly. the closeness has your heart racing, and every touch sends shivers through you—you hope the internal gay panic doesn’t translate outwardly. ellie takes her time helping you press your fingers onto the correct strings and frets to play a simple “c chord.” her fingers guiding yours with such precision causes your thoughts to veer into thousands of inappropriate possibilities. the pose feels a tad contorted, your fingers placed in a way totally foreign to you, but her reassurance builds your confidence to try. she crouches before you, making final adjustments before her greens glance back up to you expectantly, waiting for you to try.

you strum the one chord—a passable sound that resonates throughout the guitar. it gets the job done but, of course, lacks the flow that ellie could have had. but ellie is proud, her genuine smile and silly applause flustering you.

you find yourself feeling more accomplished in this single instance than in the last three skills you’ve tried combined.

“good start, guitar god. i’ll show you another one—if you think you’ll stick to a second lesson,” ellie then suggests, an endearing smile on her face as she watches you absent-mindedly fiddle with the individual strings a bit more. an effective bargaining tactic for sure.

“yep, no problem.” easiest commitment you’ve ever made.

"hell yeah," ellie rejoices, reaching out one last time to high-five you. she looks delighted. just happy to have a new, consistent student, of course--that has to be it.

you sign up for another lesson after—and maybe another. and another.

[ancientnapdragon]

First Post | Second Post

My last set of ramblings I left off on a loose cliffhanger... which will stay that way! I kinda wanted to pull apart the Food Peak itself and how it functions/how they actually Cultivate there! It seems like a fun exercise on developing the world this AU takes place in c: Maybe a few ship crumbs in there, but since I DO love to yap, expand that read more at your own risk! Hehe!

Food Cultivation is, on the surface, exactly what it sounds like. You eat stuff and it helps fortify your body, soul, and strengthens your Core! Not just ANYTHING works, though, and it's more than just finding a Chicken Faced Serpent's liver and choking it down.

Food Cultivation is seen as a super easy way to Cultivate, maybe even scorned a little bit, and can be indulged in by people who don't even usually Cultivate that way. But, it's almost impossible to get to a Golden Core stage without a LOT of money or a LOT of knowledge/work. One of those low basis to learn, high skill ceiling sorta things. Usually, the only people outside of Sects who get to that stage are very very wealthy Nobles; and even then, they're not really strong.

Food Cultivators don't need a lot of Qi or natural talent to start cultivating. The techniques that are taught specifically on CQ are all about strict control. You use what Qi you have in a very precise way to make little shields, blades, to enhance certain parts of your body, or occasionally heat or cool things. It's short, controlled bursts. Most of the really good 'talent' goes to the 'higher' Peaks so they've really gotta master what they've been given on the Food Peak.

With Food Cultivation, you can't just eat your way to success even if that's what it might sound like so far. You need to keep your body strong and master various skills before you can even hope to learn to channel Qi into them to improve them. You still need to meditate and put in the elbow grease to get you anywhere worth being.

Food Cultivation expects you to eat a lot of different things. Not everything you eat will help you grow your spirit. Plus, you can only eat the same thing so many times before it doesn't really do anything for you. Spiritual Foods, when eaten on the regular, have diminishing returns. You get a super strong Flower and eat it; the first time is a nice boost, the second time is just ok, the third isn't much, any time after that would be wasted on you, ect ect. The best that eating that flower would do for you after you've got all the 'boosts' is just helping replenish your Qi if you're low. Since you can only eat stuff a few times before it stops boosting you, it becomes sort of like a puzzle. Say you got a Strawberry and it boosted you by '20 Points' (which is probably what the System would tell SY). Then you got a piece of cheese and it boosted you by 20 points. If you cooked them together, you would get-! 15 points total! That's less than just eating them! BUT, if you dipped that Strawberry in Chocolate (20 Points, too), you might get 50 points! More than both! So, you can either eat things as they are or try and experiment and get even more of a benefit! But, you'd also have to think about stuff like cooking techniques, how long until the thing you want to eat goes bad, plus all this other stuff which can make the Boost you get higher or lower. If you just chew through everything that crosses your path, your Cultivation will suffer! You have to plan ahead on top of getting really lucky with the more rare stuff!

On the Peak itself, younger and newer disciples are given basic reading, writing, arithmetic, and basic cooking classes. The cooking classes teach basic skills like how to hold your knives properly and how to care for them, some easy recipes, ect ect! All disciples have, also, their basic Peak upkeep chores like laundry, cleaning, and lots and lots and LOTS of scrubbing.

After you've proven yourself capable enough to not slice your fingers off or set (too many) fires, disciples are expected to head down the mountain into the nearby city and set up what is basically a food kitchen. It's used to help cement basic fundamental skills! After all, you get really good at chopping something up if it's all you do for like 4 hours and slightly under duress. Usually the newer disciples handle the basic prepwork while a few of the more advanced ones will actually cook. This is overseen by a few seniors who make sure everything goes smoothly and who actually hand out the food! (I imagine that the Qian Cao ALSO do something similar nearby, except for healing. They get free food in exchange for helping out any unfortunate accidents!)

As for the more senior disciples, I think they have a few more intensive duties! Other than the Head, there are at least eleven more 'upper' Seniors. Each of these Seniors is the head chef for each of the other Peaks. When you're at a high enough skill to not fuck it up, you get rotated to act as a Chef under these Seniors at each Peak; Each Peak has their own food needs, after all! (Side note: around this time is also when you would be expected to get your Spiritual Sword) For Seniors who aren't the 'Head Peak's Chef', though, there is a secondary duty- but I gotta explain that giant pot of soup I briefly mentioned in the first post.

That Giant Cauldron of Soup is, like, more important to the Food Peak than anything else. It's some special kind of spiritual metal that the OG Founder worked to craft and stands over this massive fire pit that is constantly burning. It's HUGE, with a whole facility like half built over and around it; gotta keep the rain and snow out of the SOUP. I love stuff like Hunter's Stews and stuff like that, so this is basically what this is- this pot of soup has been stirred and tended since the OG Peak Lord first lit it. Part of a senior disciples duties is to keep the soup topped up, tasting good, and filled with stuff to help fortify your Qi.

The Soup is a huge cultural thing on the Peak. You're expected to have a giant bowl of it, with sides, every morning- even the Peak Lord. The stuff in it helps to strengthen the new/weaker disciples as well as fortify anyone older. It's a Qi superfood, even with dimishing returns. It's usually only allowed to be eaten by people on the Food Peak, though; only in emergencies will people off-Peak get any. Even the Sect Leader doesn't have the right to demand any. (SY is going to of course try and sneak some to his fussy boyfriend) Okay, so we got all that, but what about SY's obsession with the recipes that the System keeps teasing him with? Well, part of your study on the Food Peak isn't just learning to cook or even the spiritual food dance- you're training to be become a skilled chef. There is a lot of study to master the recipes from the Food Peak itself, but the disciples are also tasked with learning as much as they can and try to develop their own recipes. The skills overlap; you never know when learning to make the perfect Scrambled Egg will allow you to maximize some weird spiritual ingredient you found.

Other than non-spiritual food and The Soup, disciples are encouraged to do a lot of their Food Cultivation on their own. They are encouraged to go on Night Hunts with other Peaks for the chances to gain stuff for their own Cultivation. The Bai Zhan kids only care if they slayed the beast, so go ahead and grab it's heart for yourself, ect ect. You can, of course, trade stuff around or sell it at your leisure. Whatever will get you more gains! It's seen as either really stupid or flat out courtship to offer someone else your spiritual food you make, especially if you can still make use of it yourself. This is something that will 10000% go RIGHT over SY's head when he starts to offer stuff to SJ. They'll be about 18/19 at that point, so everyone from SY's peak will squint when they realize what he's doing. (Even though I have some Evil Plans for after they all become Peak Lords, I think that SJ would still be really welcome on the Food Peak despite how everyone else looks down on him. Everyone there 'knew' that SY was 'sweet on him' kinda thing. They don't believe that SJ is the reason SY.... hehe :) )

taps chin. okay, i thiiiiink that is enough yapping about that for now? I wanna write up a brief lil thing about how SY would be around the other Future Peak Disciples, as well as how his relationship with SJ will eventually complicate things. I know that SQH would figure out SOMETHING was up with SY when he was suddenly served, like, a blueberry waffle. But that's for another post!!! AS ALWAYS ty for reading my ramblings. I'm very slowly working on getting a more strict outline up and ready for the fic I would really like this to be. I'm a menace to myself and others, so it will be a slow burn and I'm dragging you all down with me. >:)

[oceansblvds]

I SENT THE ASK ABT TEACHER CORYO IM BEGGING YOU TO WRITE TA/PROFESSOR SNOW 😝

OKOKOK IM GONNA WRITE SOME HEADCANONS BUT I MIGHT HONESTLY EXPAND THIS INTO A FULL FIC BC im a whore!

warning(s): nsfw, obsessive behavior, lowkey an abuse of power

coriolanus, almost out of university, was selected to teach a higher level math class on the account of dr. gaul saying he needed a little bit more experience with teaching and leadership if he was to be head gamemaker. so, he was a TA, teaching under a professor but was basically given full rein with the class, as the professor seemed to focus more on research than teaching the class. the second he was in the lecture discussion, he saw you walk in. you were a junior, just a year under him in university and god were you beautiful. almost mouth wateringly so. it made him sick in the head at how pretty you were.

and gods above, you were smart, almost as smart as he was (though he wouldn't ever admit that) and it was clear that you liked him. you always smiled when he complimented your high scores on tests and quizzes, and would read the notes that he put in the margins of your essays with a glimmer in your eyes. he needed to talk to you, needed to be closer to you, and the only way that he could think of was to give you slightly lower marks on your essays and homeworks. never on a test, he would never want to drop your grade low enough for it to be concerning, but he did wait for you to stumble into his office hours. and you did. you asked him how you could do better on the material, and he told you that he'd help you.

he didn't have an office, only a classroom that he was lent during his office hours in the top floor of the math building. it was there that you would meet him, every tuesday and thursday, to go over problems. he liked the way that your lip would be bitten in between your teeth when you were looking at a particularly hard problem, or when you would look at him with your big doe eyes when you asked him for help. and whenever you asked him for help, he would lean closer, and explain it to you.

one day, he finally got the courage to make a move. you asked him for help and he placed his hand on your thigh, as if he was using it to keep himself steady as he leaned over. but instead of watching him explain on the paper, you kept your attention on his face. and then he pushed his hand further up your thigh, under your skirt, and you didn't stop him. your hand came to his and you pushed it up until it was cupping your pussy. he fingered you right then and there, hoping beyond hoping that no one else would walk into his office hours for help. the two of you made out while he fingered you, going as far as to press three fingers into you, with a squelching sound, your moans echoing through the room softly.

that became somewhat of a normal thing. you two always met during his office hours, until you decided to go to his home one day for some extra tutoring. it ended with you in his large bed with your legs spread, while he put his fingers in your mouth as he fucked you with such fervor that you were sure you were going to break.

sometimes when he was grading papers, you would slink under his desk and pull his cock out, spitting on the tip and bobbing your head up and down until he gave you the attention you wanted. he always fantasized about you doing this when he was teaching another class, with you working him with your mouth as he sat on his desk and no one else knew the wiser. he would have to try that with you one day.

lots of words like how dirty you were for sleeping with your teacher. "you're such a needy thing, aren't you?" "show me how good you've gotten" when you were riding him. "you probably fantasize about my cock in class, don't you?" it was all so derogatory. and other times he would praise you. he would tell you how smart and beautiful you were. he would let you cum when you got a problem right while he sat under the desk, eating you out. when you got a problem wrong, he would stop, and no amount of begging would get him to continue unless you continued your work.

[bouquetface]

Solar Return Observations 3

Accuracy influenced by entire chart

SR VENUS conjunct NATAL MERCURY

This can sometimes indicate resolving issues. Venus can offer a harmonious energy. You or someone else may effectively communicate to create solution.

House placement is important as well - EX: In 3rd, it could be with a childhood friend, siblings/cousin, neighbour. You or them could reach out to resolve past problems.

SR VENUS conjunct NATAL VENUS

In a social house like 7th, 5th, 11th, 1st, this can indicate a new romantic interest.

In 11th, 10th or 2nd this can indicate a blessing in finances, reputation, or long term goals.

In 10th, you may be promoted. You may find a new source of income. You may be better perceived. A boost in reputation or status.

In 2nd, you may purchase one or many new possession. You may find a new source of income. You may receive help in finances.

However, keep in mind entire chart influences accuracy. For example, SR VENUS conjunct NATAL VENUS in 2nd H opposite Jupiter. This can manifest as making purchases that you can’t afford. Venus can feel indulgent. If you’re not disciplined in finances, Jupiter in 8th may expand your debt/what you owe.

SR Lilith in 9th

Usually I don’t put too much focus on asteroids in SR. However, I have seen this many times in the charts of friend’s in the year they dropped out.

This can manifest as being the “outcast”. You may not feel you belong while travelling. You may feel you don’t belong while enrolled in a uni or other type of higher educational program.

SR SOUTH NODE conjunct ASC

This can result in unintentional or intentional weight loss. South Node can create decrease. In my experience, this can be a year where you focus less on yourself. You don’t even realize you aren’t getting enough sleep and/or food. Your focus is on your relationship’s with other people (romantic, business, platonic). Since SR NORTH NODE would be in 7th, this can be due to changes in relationships with others.

However, depending on your chart and personality, this could be weight gain as you do not care about your physical self. You unintentionally gain as you neglect yourself.

SR MARS IN 8th

This is can be a difficult placement. Be careful to not act on any impulsive or negative thoughts. You may experience a lot of emotional distress. Mars can be quick to act.

You may rely on other people’s finances as well. A negative manifestation of this would be stealing money or a possession from someone else.

SR Jupiter in 5th

This can indicate you or someone else is expecting a child.

You may meet new romantic interests.

You may find new hobbies. You can teach others about these hobbies/recreational activities.

The negative manifestation is you may find there is a lot of drama in your life this year. You may want to check aspects & natal jupiter placement for more insight. Example: If natal Jupiter is 10th, possibly this drama is regarding the workplace or authority figures.

SR SOUTH NODE in 12th H

This can leave you feeling mentally or physically depleted. The reasons may be unknown to you. A mystery illness. Negative emotion lurking behind you for possibly unknown reasons.

North node would be in 6th if you have this placement. This suggests you may be inspired to focus on fixing your health. You may join a gym or find other ways to be active. You may create an entirely new routine. You may get a pet to help your mental health.

A negative manifestation would be changes in daily life possibly on the job that negatively affect your mental or physical well-being.

SR MARS conjunct ASC

This can make you prone to accidents. You could develop a rash. You may find scars on your body or face. You may struggle with more frequent breakouts.

The positive manifestation is you are more energized. You could be more active this year. You could be more assertive and action orientated. This may lead to more arguments.

SR MARS conjunct MC

This can indicate your being seen as more assertive. You may go for leadership roles in the workplace. This can indicate hostility in the workplace and in regard to your reputation/status.

ex: Let’s say SR MC is conjunct URANUS & SR MARS is conjunct MC. This seriously indicates a tough work year. You may unexpectedly be fired or quit.

SR PLUTO conjunct SR VERTEX

This indicates a transformative event that is fated. This event may lead to receiving more power or status. However, if badly placed it can be a loss of power & status.

To find in which area of life it will occur, check for the house. EX:

4th H : You may move. You may experience a death in the family.

6th: You may experience the death of a pet. You may be diagnosed with an illness or disorder.

3rd: You may move neighbourhood. You may get a new vehicle. Your relationships with siblings, cousins, childhood friends and even neighbours may change.

SR Saturn conjunct Neptune

This transit will kick your ass if you have been doing any shady shit - lying, cheating, stealing, going behind people's back, etc. The consequences are unavoidable. I have seen people who have this in their SR be exposed, shamed and left.

If you aren't doing any of that, it can still be tough. You may find other's around you are exposed. They could have been going behind your back.

Depending on house & sign, the experience will force you to mature. You can get a hard reality check if you haven't been actually working toward you goals. Saturn will bring experiences that make it hard for Neptune to keep you in a dream state. Saturn wants you to create a solid plan and start working toward your dreams.

[frenshushutoast]

minghao as your boyfriend

notes: happy new year! my first post in a Long time but here's to more writing in 2024... let's do this!

lots of quiet moments together. even in loud, crowded rooms, minghao still finds a way to give you little moments of solace with a hand in yours and quiet, whispered conversations.

art gallery dates! so many art gallery dates. every time a new one opens, you're equally excited to go visit. sometimes you'll both quietly share your interpretations of the different pieces with each other, and sometimes you'll just bask in the beauty of the creations and simply being able to experience it together.

very endeared by you. you will simply exist and he'll let out his soft giggle, burying his face in your shoulder, pinching your cheeks, and kissing all over your face when you guys are alone together. you're confused when he first does it, asking what you did for him to be so impossibly fond. he just responds with a you're so cute, baby and it makes you far more flustered than you're willing to admit.

very protective over you. not because he thinks you're weak–you're one of the strongest people he knows���but he's very gentle with you anyways. he does everything he can to make sure you don't get hurt, and is very, very attentive to you. you've been doing everything yourself for so long, he just wants to take care of you.

you're both a very fashionable couple. long trench coats, nail designs, matching colour schemes. everybody is intimidated by you until they catch you giggling together in a corner.

loves having you in his lap. he'll wrap his hands around your waist and rest his cheek on your shoulder, quietly telling you how much he appreciates everything about you.

he will casually say the most devastating things, randomly, while he traces little shapes on your hip. baobei, i'd give you all the stars if you ask. you're my warm patch of sunlight, my safe space. everything slows down when i'm with you. little i love you's scattered all over the things he says to you.

he gets uncharacteristically shy when you compliment him. the first time you do it, it's when he got his nails done differently and you told him it was pretty and his ears went very red. you've taken advantage of it ever since.

takes you on romantic dinner dates, well thought out and so, so perfect.

he teaches you how to slow dance, even through all the times you accidentally step on his foot. he twirls you and kisses you so sweetly, you could turn to putty in his hands.

a Very good kisser. i could expand on this but the brain worms are simply too strong. but he's Good with his tongue. the first time you really kiss him, you pull away very breathless and tell him just that. the only thing he answers you with is a small smug smile and a gentle peck, so different from the heated makeout session.

takes the best photos of you and hypes you up while he does it. the only reason your instagram feed looks so good is because of his amazing photography skills.

[dailyadventureprompts]

Deity: Boccob, the God of Magic for Magic's Sake

Artsource

It is strange (especially for those who view their relationship with the gods as transactional) that one might offer up prayers to a figure known widely by the epithet " The Uncaring". Why perform oath and ritual for a being that will not intercede on your behalf? Or grant you good favour in exchange for your sacrifices? Those that study the words of Boccob understand they have no need to beg for miracles when they have magic at their command.

Known to commoners as a god of magic, foresight, and balance, Boccob is not so much a deity as he was a great teacher, a philosopher-sage who's now ancient treatise on magic and council on it's use are as much an object of faith for many as a more ordinary god's scripture. In instructing his students how to be wizards, Boccob taught his students how to be good wizards, and these lessons form the ironshod foundations of innumerable magical traditions practised to this day.

Central to Boccob's teachings was the idea that magic was a path that must be walked to gain greater understanding, and that an adherent of this path should study, experience, and witness as much of its wonders as possible in order to become better arcanists, leading to the adoption of the open and unjudging eye as his symbol. Boccob himself followed this path to the outer planes and beyond, never to be seen again, leading many to credit Boccob with being the first mortal to climb the fabled infinite staircase, or perhaps even its architect.

Adventure Hooks:

Millennia after his (literal or figurative) ascension, a scroll containing hitherto unseen passages of Boccob's writings have been discovered in a crumbling library, setting off a disastrous chain of events as jealous archmages scrabble for the text like seagulls after a frenchfry. Their clashes are frequent, leaving the surrounding area scattered with hastily summoned servitors and all manner of misfired magic. Perhaps if the party is quick and clever they could sneak in and take the text for themselves, learning its wisdom or using it as a bargaining chip with one of these powerful spellslingers.

If it’s one thing Boccob’s Acolytes like almost as much as uncovering the arcane secrets of the universe, it’s proving their intellectual superiority by hiding their findings behind inscrutable riddles and logic games, the way The Uncaring did for his first pupils. Ledoran’s Labynthical Libram is an infamous example of this practice, a spellbook containing all manner of useful rituals and genuinely brilliant insights hidden behind a gauntlet of ciphers, mazes, and "gotcha" enchantments. Any self styled master of the arcane is likely to have a copy on their shelves, meaning that' it's only a quick looting spree away from ending up in the party's possession.

If "a wizard did it" is the answer to the age old question of "how?", "because they were listening to Boccob?" is the answer to the inevitable follow up of "why". Arcane crossbreeds, inexplicable puzzle dungeons, magical items amounting to bad jokes with bodycounts, all of these are created by The Uncaring's followers as a means of testing and expanding their abilities.

More of my adventures involving Boccob and his followers can be found HERE

Lets get into some philosophy...

While Ioun promotes the study of arcana for the sake of furthering knowledge, Mystra maintains and obscures the secrets of the weave, and Corellon glories in the wonders spellcraft might create , Boccob focuses on the pursuit of magical ability as a means and end of its own.

To Boccob, " I want to learn magic so I can be great/help people/make life easier" is a false start, because it ties the acquisition and understanding of magic to an external metric, encouraging the practitioner to take shortcuts with the magic to achieve their worldly desires.

Greatness, beneficence, and ease of living are but some of the infinite virtues that follow from being a great mage. Indeed, a reoccuring theme in Boccobian writing (especially in the ensuing literature made by his followers) is the idea of the Panexplicatic endstate of magic, where the perfect mage (and the body of wisdom they represent) has an answer for all things, specifically a magical awnser.

While some followers have taken this to mean that a mage's pursuit should always be towards omnipotence (Vecna's grasping eye motif can be seen as a direct response to Boccob's unjudging one) the largely more accepted thought is that arcanists should specifically dream small, creating a self sufficient life for themselves withdrawn from the world while focusing on the inward path towards enlightenment. That's why you'll so often find wizards at the top of spires in remote areas, interacting only with their apprentices or whatever travellers have gone far afield to seek them out for magical guidance.

This leads into one of the main critiques of Boccobian thought, which is that it alienates the practitioner from the world at large, not only focusing on magic to the exclusion of all else but also contextualizing magic as something that exists only to help the practitioner along their individual path, other people and consequences be damned. A hedgemage living a simple life in the forest may seem like they're hurting no one when they create a tree that grows a full crop of apples every day so they don't need to worry about stocking their larder... but what happens to the local ecosystem when these everladen trees start cross pollinating with others, to say nothing of the drain/disruption to nearby laylines and how such magic might have downstream consequences. To take a completely different tack with the same problem, the poor in the village nearby might LOVE to have a bottomless supply of apples, but the Boccobian adherent would say that because they haven't devoted the years of study required to create the tree, they're not entitled to its fruits.

Titles: The Uncaring, the Master of all Magics, Archmage of the Infinite

Symbols: An eye in a pentagram, often crowned with a crescent arc.

Signs: Light through a cracked open door, stars that seem longer than they should be, the appearance of inexplicable magical text.

Worshippers: Sorcerers, wizards, and any with an access to magic innate or otherwise. Adherents usually worship in private practice but occasionally band together into temples or schools.

[zsakuva]

I'm sure this has been asked, but I had found your stuff recently and absolutely love how the different characters are with each being just as charming as the next. My question is what is the thought/writing process? I am wanting to be better at defining my ocs and characters without falling into the same trope and behaviors the characters have exhibit. Obviously there are different methods for different people, but I'll like to know a little bit of the process for you. Do you have any tips to make the voices distinct and consistent through out a piece of writing?

Thank you!

For me, because I have a proclivity for world-building (meaning I am absolutely obsessed and must know the lore before I do anything), I like to understand the path a character has chosen. Their past experiences and upbringing have a dramatic impact on how they shape their own life, and that informs me of how a character acts, talks, and how they both see and react to the world around them.

I'll use Isaac Rhoades as a brief example (I wrote brief but this is not brief at all, my bad xD).

From the beginning, Isaac was written with a sealed heart and a cold personality. He's an articulate and smart man, a workaholic, but he lives in solitude.

I always ask myself how and why a character is who they are, and what decisions they made/experiences they've had to bring them to this point.

For Isaac, his background paints quite the picture:

Born to loving parents, and his grandfather is a successful private investigator — The early part of his childhood nurtured love and care. His mother in particular showed him what it meant to love unconditionally.

His parents are murdered because of his grandfather's choice — Isaac was taught that even the people you love can hurt you, and that nowhere is a safe space.

Learning under his grandfather — Because of his vast portfolio and cases, Isaac is taught more about the workings of the world, and how to stay cautious. There was no space for fun or games; his only objective was expanding his knowledge in many subjects that his grandfather deemed worthy.

Getting stabbed by the maid — This reinforced the thought of a perpetual threat and the need to stay vigilant. It instilled paranoia in him to trust no one.

University in England and Andrew — Here, he remembers the love of his childhood, but also the threat of losing someone else because of his own decisions, taught by his grandfather.

Learning the reason of his grandfather's decision — Isaac was taught that there is always more to one person, for better or worse, as taught by the maid. Due to this and what he's learnt thus far, Isaac decides to seclude himself so he's never forced to make that kind of choice.

Succeeding his grandfather — Being a private investigator opened his eyes to humanity's extremes: the lengths they would go for their own desires at the detriment of others, and the yearning others had to better the world. His work reminds him of his life experiences, and these beliefs constantly clash.

Isaac is distant and cold at first because his life taught him not to trust anyone—even the unassuming—and he doesn't want to let anyone in; they could either betray him, or he could lose them. And yet, despite that, his mother's teachings managed to peek through when he saw Pickle in the alley, alluding to his true nature. Through Isaac's story, his internal struggle begins to rear: desperately wanting to feel love again, but knowing the cost if he does give in and the inevitable choice he might have to make if he opens his heart again.

Isaac is articulate and smart because of his grandfather's teachings. One can assume he stayed in that house for the rest of his teenage years until he left for university, so the only person he really interacted with was his grandfather. Because of this, he's factual, precise, and seldom makes jokes because mostly every conversation had been connected to work in some form. Small talk is a waste of time, and he doesn't indulge others unless there's a reason for it. He's meticulous with when to speak and when to listen.

Isaac is a workaholic because that is what his life has been shaped to be, also likely influenced by his grandfather. He has money, but continues to work. Why? Perhaps it's because he'd be without purpose otherwise. Or is it because he feels it's his duty to continue in his grandfather's footsteps and find the one thing that matters in the ocean of bullshit?

All of this shapes who Isaac is. It wouldn't make sense for him to have the same disposition as Andrew. Though they are similar in ways (articulation, education, work addiction), they take different forms and stem from the unique experiences they've lived. Where Andrew can engage in small talk (he had a freer childhood, a rebellious and fun twin brother, and more public school education/social interactions), Isaac can't. And though they both carry the weight of their own regrets alone, Andrew chooses to live with what he has, but Isaac chooses to endlessly bear the weight of the world and live up to his grandfather's bravery.

SO. With that being said, a suggestion I can give is to constantly remind yourself who your character is with every decision they make. Is it true to them? Does it make sense for them? But remember, humans are also notoriously contradictive, and one is not the same as another. We experience and react to the same conditions in completely different ways; who you are and what you've been through can determine the outcome.

I hope this has helped in some form of way!

Again I apologise for this monstrous post have fun writing aaaaa-

[stellarsagittarius]

☀️Sun in Synastry - How this person lights you up ☀️

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Their Sun in your 1st House Synastry

Sun is the illumination. Sun is attention and the core of our essence. When someone's Sun falls in your 1st house, you can expect this person to completely transform your outlook on life. The Sun person will show you new ways of being, they will show you traits about yourself, they will be like a mirror to you. Their love language will be to motivate the heck out of you. This person will encourage you immensely to be a better person. They will teach a lot about who you are. Your mindset will expand and grow with this person's presence. They will hold you down in your darkest times, and will fly together with you in your best times. Expect a lot of compliments from this person, a lot of deep talks where you touch the very ways of being authentic & being yourself, a lot of admiration for the person that you are! You both will relate to each other immensely and will grow together as two individuals. The Sun person will feel like they found a person worth sharing their life with, because you two are so similar in so many ways. There could be a little bit of competition involved, but rest assured if this is a healthy relationship, you won't have to worry.

Their Sun in your 2nd House Synastry

This is kind of materialistic, but this person is actually so whipped up for you, that they can't really focus on anything else. This person is extremely attracted to how you carry yourself, what your beliefs and focus on life is, what it is that you do with your body, your possessions, how you act, etc. This person has a whole dictionary about you built in their heads. This may sound a bit obsessive, BUT it's in a good way. Because this person simply adores the way you carry yourself. They are attracted to how nicely you put yourself together, your habits and values, they are super inspired by that! You can expect this person to gift you a lot of things that they might want to be a part of your aesthetic. They might be super touchy, especially in healthy romantic relationships, the Sun person will love to adore your body, make you feel good about yourself, see you enjoying the experiences they give to you ;) . You will feel like they constantly have their eyes on you and even from a far without seeing it you can just tell that they were peeking glances at you. You will feel super adored and cherished by them. And they will make sure to do whatever it is that will put a genuine smile on your face.

Their Sun in your 3rd House Synastry

This person will be extremely talkative around you. Even if this is a very shy and introverted person, you can very well expect their talkative side to come out in your presence! They will naturally feel like expressing their thoughts to you. And they will feel like found an amazing companion with whom they can discuss anything and grow their minds in plenty of ways. You both will share a lot of deep conversations, ideas that you both will bond on, and you can expect plenty of similar opinions on plenty of things. The Sun person will open up to you in plenty of way and you will find a buddy with whom you share a lot of similar ideas and interests. This is not extremely romantic, like the cases where the couple is super intimate or involved in each other's lives. This is more lighthearted and about a very beautiful friendship built on common interests. This person's love language is to speak what they feel about you, they are very honest and don't really sugarcoat anything. You can always expect to have a good laugh with this person about anything. They will be super goofy around you.

Their Sun in your 4th House Synastry

When someone's Sun falls in your 4th house, you can really expect a sense of intimacy and closeness with that person. This person will feel like a home that you always wanted to return to. You both will build a very deep sense of attachment and closeness with each other. The Sun person will feel very seen in the presence of the house person. They will like they finally found a person who understands them to a great length. You both will be very active when alone. Expect a lot of quality time together where you both just spend as much time as you both can simply understanding each other and feeling comfortable in each other's presence. You both will share a lot of "secrets", in a way where the Sun person will only open up truly with you. You will see a very emotionally charged and vulnerable side of the Sun person. They will feel like you can just 'get' them for no real reason, and therefore sometimes they might feel a bit hesitant or shy with you. Their love language is to spend time alone together where you both create this safe space for each other to express whatever you both feel. You can also expect almost this baby like behavior from this person because they just feel so safe with you!

Their Sun in your 5th House Synastry

When the Sun falls in the 5th house in synastry, an undeniable sense of joy and creative expression permeates the connection between two individuals. The Sun person becomes a radiant source of inspiration and vitality for the house person, igniting a profound sense of playfulness and enjoyment in their presence. There is a natural harmony and synchronization between the energies, fostering a deep emotional connection and a shared zest for life's pleasures. The house person experiences a magnetic pull towards the Sun person, as if they have found a muse who understands and appreciates their unique talents and desires. When someone's Sun falls in your 5th house, it's like you've found your own personal ray of sunshine. The Sun feels naturally themselves in your presence. Since is at home in the 5th house. This connection thrives on quality time spent together, nurturing a sacred space where they can openly express their deepest emotions and create lasting memories. The love language between them is a fusion of passion, creativity, and genuine companionship, creating a tapestry of shared experiences that celebrates their individuality and brings out the best in each other.

Their Sun in your 6th House Synastry

When someone's Sun falls in your 6th house in synastry, it's like having a dependable partner who's got your back. This person brings stability and practicality to the table, making you feel supported and grounded. They understand the importance of getting things done and staying organized, which meshes well with your need for routines, and a stable life. Together, you make a great team, always ready to lend a helping hand and push each other to achieve your goals. You appreciate how the Sun person sees your efforts and values your attention to detail. You'll find yourselves spending a lot of time working together, tackling tasks and creating a sense of accomplishment. Acts of service and practical gestures are their love language. You both show each other that you're reliable and committed to help each other in whatever situation. This is a good aspect for co-workers and if you both are working on something together, like managing a home and kids! The Sun person will show you ways to have better routines or they might totally change your lifestyle. You both make an awesome team!

Their Sun in your 7th House Synastry

With someone's Sun in your 7th house, you will experience a deep sense of commitment and closeness with them. The Sun person will be like your soulmate, your perfect companion. You will find that all the qualities that you seek in an ideal partner, are presented in the Sun person. With this placement, you both will feel like each other's ride or die, or partner's in crime. The Sun person's love language is to spend a lot of quality time together, literally being together, and just supporting each other in whatever. This is a very ideal placement for romantic relationships because the Sun person becomes this perfect other half. The 7th house is all about "the others." Sun will help you feel fulfilled in this relationship, will teach you a lot about relationships and making a relationship itself work. You will learn to depend upon each other in a healthy way, to communicate your needs in a healthy way, and to learn how you can be there for someone through the thick and thin. There will be a lot of joy and playfulness in this relationship. You will feel like you found you soulmate, or a person that just simply gets you!

Their Sun in your 8th House Synastry

The 8th house, especially in Synastry is super intense and deep. Because the 8th house is all about bonds, secrets, transformation and rebirth. It's all about what you share with someone else. Therefore when someone's Sun falls into your 8th house, you can expect to share an extremely deep connection with them. And by deep, I don't mean just deep talks, this is a whole mind, body and soul deep. This will bind you to the Sun person on a whole new level. You both will feel super involved in each other's lives. The Sun person will illuminate your secrets, your deepest darkest side, all your shadows. You will feel like a completely different person in their presence. They will show you parts of yourself that were so deeply buried within you. This person's love language, honestly is just anything that exist to make you feel loved and better. The Sun person is so infatuated, so intrigued by your essence, that they can't help but be involved in anything and everything that you do. They don't hold back. This relationship might get obsessive sometimes for the both of you, but remember to always trust each other first and foremost. You both will thrive in environments when both of your needs are met equally.

Their Sun in your 9th House Synastry

When someone's Sun falls into your 9th house, you can truly expect this connection to be full of excitement and growth. This is the type of couple that will explore the world together, have adventures, make plenty of memories, teach each other so much about life, and these two might even change each other's philosophy/outlook on life while in this relationship. The Sun person feels super interested about learning your philosophy on life. The Sun person looks up to you as this wise soul who can teach them a lot about life. You will feel like the Sun person is this curious soul who is always eager to learn something new about life. With this aspect you can expect a relationship filled with a sense of adventure, any kind of. You will have more fun with the Sun person than you have had with any other person (unless they have their Sun in your 9th house as well). Sun's love language is to make memories with you, any kind of. They would love to go on adventures with you, travel with you, make beautiful memories with you. Anything with the Sun person will feel super thrilling. This might turn into a restless energy where both of you can't catch up with each other's need to live their life to the fullest. The Sun person will be your greatest teacher about life.

Their Sun in your 10th House Synastry

The 10th house is the highest point in the sky, and having someone's Sun there tells us that they will be an extremely influential person when it comes to our public image. The Sun person is naturally the person who other people consider you to be. Your social mask will be even more illuminated by the Sun person. They will shine bright, when they are around you. People might be immensely drawn to their presence in your life. This also symbolizes that the Sun person will play an important role in your career and public life. They are someone who gives you much more publicity than you usually get or if you are an introverted person they make you become super social and interactive with others. Sun will also make you feel more confident and bold than usual. You will feel a heightened sense of ambition, recognition and power. This is kind of giving, "Whenever you will be remembered/talked about by others, some way or the other the Sun person's name will follow up." The Sun person will bring you lots of growth in your career field, and they will almost be like a mentor. Romantically speaking, the Sun person loves to show you off, praise you for your achievements, and they love it when people see you both together.

Their Sun in your 11th House Synastry

The 11th house is all about networking, dreams, hopes, long term plans, etc. This is the most social house. When someone's Sun falls in your 11th house, you will find that they are present in every one of your social interactions somehow. Sun person will be very popular among your friends and networks. The Sun person will give you a heightened sense of going after what you desire. They will truly be your biggest cheerleader. You will feel like you found you best friend who is with you on every step of the way while you set out to fulfill your hopes and desires. They will help you immensely along the way, perhaps by guiding you with the right steps to take or by introducing you to people who can help you immensely. The Sun person will feel like a beautiful star around your presence because you share with them your plans and hopes. They will feel like you value them a lot because they are like this guiding light in your life. Sun's love language is to include you in their own dreams and plans, to always encourage you and be there for you as a helping hand whenever you aspire for something. You will find a deep sense of fulfillment in this relationship because Sun will help you realise a lot more about your own ideals of life.

Their Sun in your 12th House Synastry

12th house is the most "hidden in plain sight" type of house. Often times the Sun person will express themselves in such subtle ways that will make you wonder if they are really expressing themselves or if it's just you. This relationship is build on very subconscious clues and those unrecognizable signs. The Sun person activates this intuitive side of yours where you can just perceive what's up with them or why they are behaving the way they are. A heightened intuition is a keyword here. The Sun person finds you to be very mysterious, and someone who they cannot really understand just by looking at the surface. The Sun person feels a lot of intense thoughts/emotions whenever you are around. And you feel super attracted to them because they feel like this ball of light that has lit up your darkest house. This person might make you loose your mind upon how intensely obsessed they make you feel with them, and vice versa. There is a sense of very strong connection on the spiritual side, therfore it's also a very karmic house because this type of intense connection will tangle you both very deeply with each other. You will feel like an unexplainable attraction towards them, and you will be fascinated by who they are as a person.

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[ranticore]

this may be too big a question to easily answer, but how does the internal experience of a kattakati.... work? what does it feel like to claim something out of your control as a part of yourself? or to loosen up your grip on "identity" enough to allow an independent entity to fit within it without contradiction? do they perceive each other as independent, even? or is it a given that a part of yourself will retain autonomy and it just doesn't bother them much?

so zeta developed extremely differently to the other sirenians and are more influenced behaviourally and psychologically by their genetic engineering, so their points of view are slightly different on a population-wide level. for zeta, the formation of a kattakati bond is a distant extension of their genetic engineering. the engineers basically went into their brains with a hammer, like a bull in a china shop, to smash away any POSSIBILITY of their engineered slaves forming community, viewing one another as allies, social function, language, some areas of memory etc. the zeta generation sirenians were supposed to be workers who would never organise, never wish for more, and were cheaper than robots to maintain (self-sustaining!!!)

it's this specific goal of the genetic engineers that caused the uprising in the first settlement on Siren; when Ishmael et al learned what the engineers were doing, and realised that it would be morally unconscionable to allow it to occur. they made the choice - FOR the zeta, who were not given any representation in this rebellion - that the genetic code could never make it off the planet, to be used elsewhere. and that meant a (ultimately failed) attempt to hunt the first generations of zeta to extinction.

in any case the zeta population had to live with these effects and re-develop social functioning, p.much from scratch. this is why they're the only sirenian group i generalise in my posts; they were insular, apart from everyone else, and had very little input from other populations for almost the entirety of siren's history. when redeveloping their social functioning, they developed the early form of kattakati to kind of... reverse-engineer family groups. if you are engineered to be hyper individualistic, the world is not "us" but "me vs everything else". but community is good for survival. if you expand "me" to include other people, who are also "me", then they can perform this sleight of hand that enfolds others into your individualistic sense of Me Vs The World. the first kattakati were comprised of many bodies, forming large, complex structures, and in these I/Me/We/Us ceased to have independent meaning.

over time the broken social function became functional, but not repaired or regenerated or whatever, they still experience a different internal state than most other sirenians, but it works, and they don't need to encompass ALL of their community into their 'Me' in order to care for them or cooperate with them. i touched on it in this post but friendships require some care and effort to maintain still, and there can be an element of play-acting kattakati with others as a way to teach oneself how to form other bonds, like training wheels. but the concept of kattakati has become largely ritualised rather than strictly functional, this is where all the stuff about balance and various taboos come from. most zeta don't participate and they do fine Living In A Society.

so to answer your actual questions:

what does it feel like to claim something out of your control as a part of yourself? - so is your digestive system, your hair colour, your health. it requires trust, of course, but you aren't supposed to want to control all aspects of yourself. attaining this state of balance between red and blue within a single kattakati involves accepting a loss of control.

or to loosen up your grip on "identity" enough to allow an independent entity to fit within it without contradiction? - i feel this way about marriage, which is, intrinsically, kind of a horrifying concept! but you have to trust. contradiction is natural (if two bodies of a kattakati agree on everything all the time, it's actually deemed suspicious! they're trying too hard to make it fit, and therefore aren't compatible). now to be able to loosen that grip, first you need to have been raised in a culture where developing that grip does not feature. although they were made to be hyper-individualistic, what actually resulted was almost a hive mind in the strictest sense, not the pop-science imagining of it. that 'Me', when encompassing so many people, can very easily become a completely interchangeable, functionally identical Us/Me. but if you are one of the many zeta raised somewhere else, with a mixed community of zeta and others, you might hang onto a concept of identity that could make forming a kattakati bond an uncomfortable idea. some still do it, others reject it entirely. most kattakati feel pretty neutral about it though... it's just how they are.

do they perceive each other as independent, even? or is it a given that a part of yourself will retain autonomy and it just doesn't bother them much? - it's the second thing. it shouldn't bother you (within reason). sometimes the component bodies will workshop what kind of person they are - are they patient, aggressive, argumentative, kind, easygoing? it's possible for a kattakati's personality to be different to what the component bodies' would be if they were unbonded.