#and i want a place to yap
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Long ago, millennium ago, Marco had a lover.
To Marco, this person was the sun itself, bright, beautiful and jaw-dropping sexy. Marco loved kissing their body and making them scream. He wasn't that much into sex but since meeting them, sex is basically his love language.
One day, he's been told rather rudely that this lover is to be executed. Why? Marco didn't know this, but his lover was the legitimate heir of a demon lord in hell.
At first, Marco refused to believe it. They're great! They're sweet! It's insulting to hear that. However, they confirmed it when Marco visited them in prison.
It didn't matter. Why should it? Any God worth their salt had all done bad things, worse than his lover's lineage but they couldn't take it. They cried and said sorry for tricking Marco into loving them. It broke Marco's heart to see them cry, more than their death.
It's back at square one. He tried so hard to make them trust him and just when he could finally have them, they disappeared.
After spending forever grieving, Marco spends his days looking for his lover, crossing dimensions and worlds to see where his lover's soul had gone.
He wanted to apologise for leaving them. He wanted them to know that they didn't 'trick' him at all. He waited so long for someone to match his energy, to make him laugh, to light him up, to make him want to be good.
They were everything he could ever want and need. It's a frustrating search. He once found his lover trapped in a fucking dandelion.
He goes to earth one day and was hanging out in a forest. He knew people could see him but he didn't care. He didn't care for much nowadays. He barely ate.
Earth food wasn't as good as food in the heavens. Then again, how could he eat food from the place that killed his sweetheart? It's a petty thing.
Still, as Marco slept, he looked at the sky and thought it wasn't as beautiful as heaven but it'll do. It looked better than hell, surely.
"Oi! Don't run like that, you little shit. Dandan will fucking kill us."
Marco woke up and turned his head. So vulgar.
A little boy ran out with a hat and jumped around. He said, "I don't care! I want to play hide and seek! Can we, Ace? Ace! Ace! Ace!"
"Shut up!"
That boy was cute, Marco agreed but then a taller young man came behind him. He's some hideous clothes, a faded yellow thing tucked into 'jeans' as he learnt. His messy hair covered half his face and it looked dry. He looked exhausted.
And then Marco saw his face as the young man looked up at the sky and cursed. Brown eyes that glowed a honey colour in the sun, a straight nose, lots of freckles that showed off where Marco loved kissing his lover mostātheir cheeks that blushed whenever Marco smiled at them.
Marco nearly fell off the tree.
The young man picked the boy up and cleaned up his hair and adjusted his strawhat. He poked the boy's nose and tickled his armpits. He smiled softly when the child laughed.
That's all he needed to see. His lover had always wanted a little boy.
#marcoace#marco fushichou#portgas d ace#wow first post things#i need a place to share my ideas#but i didn't want to pollute my art blog?#this is fr rambles and other things#i wonder how long this will last#but for now#hi!!#i write fan fic#and i want a place to yap#and talk to people#nice to meet you!
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Could you draw Frollo having a religious panic attack infront of Hades?
He's about to piss his pants for sure šļøššļø
#Hades is gonna have fun with that asshole lol#I need a fic about them š£ļøš£ļø#like Frollo just yapping abt he wants to go to heaven but nah nah nah I've already had a place for ya#better lock him down there#frollo#disney#hades#claude frollo#hercules#disney villains#the hunchback of notre dame#ask#sorry for my late reply my work piled up š§āāļø
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they really put alicent in bridgerton blue on the reunion and genuinely expected me to think that she didnāt in fact march all the way to dragonstone to get wifed up? bfr
#I am only a girl living in a society#I make connections#she looks so pretty in blue though I want more#also youāre telling me that rhaenyra saw her walk in all cute looking to not completely crumble at the sight of her?#like my girl got all dolled up for you do something#rhaenyra IS a puppy dog when it comes to those bambi eyes shut up#Alicent was like you think you want her? Iām the love of your life you moron#and rhaenyra is like I KNOW#like sheās been trying to get the other woman to realize that very thing for the last 15+ years#and alicentās all heartbroken like oh so youāre taking her to wife#and rhaenyra is like nO? WHAT?? all dumb and speechless cause jealous alicent was definitely not on her bingo card this year#whilst also having her own mental breakdown#because how on earth is she meant to explain this to her councel#or jace for that matter#that sure was goint to be a fun future conversation to have with her heir#but also Alicent just strutted into the room and started acting like a scorned wife?#which left rhaenyra feeling like the asshole parent who stopped paying for child support after the divorce#but also she never wanted a divorce in the first place?? and alicent doesnāt seem to get this?#like sheās already figuring out how to most efficiently empty daemonās chambers for the woman to move in permanently#but alicentās still yapping off about not having a place in court anymore and fleeing across the sea#and rhaenyra canāt help the bitter taste in her mouth as she states how that ship came in a little too late for them and it is messyyyy#hotd leaks#house of the dragon leaks#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#rhaenicent#alicent hightower#rhaenyra targaryen#bridgerton
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I have a lot of leftover drawings in my gallery. [Blank Scripts AU]
[Content Warning: Images below contain Gore, Death, and Disturbing/Uncomfortable Imagery]
I find it a bit cute knowing they start out as crazy and then slowly settle into something calmer and relatively healthier after learning to adapt to each other's lust-turned-love. [Stanley did it first but hey :3]
#tsp blank scripts au#they love each other [genuinely] theyd rather die if theyre to go without each other by this point#hhmmm I hope the last few images arent too damning#These two go through a lot during the progression of their relationship#and I wanted to showcase that yknow?#theyre demented but theyre just perfect for each other kind of way#lovingly tearing each other apart and rebuilding each other to do it over and over again#repeating this dull process of endings over and over and finding ways to keep themselves entertained#this place was never even meant to be fun#but now that theyve gotten entangled with each other#they cant help but want to play around#even if its just for a little bit?#work can continue later right?#they love each other a little bit too much they actually need to be put in a separate cage#like a spider and a praying mantis#is it painful? yes. is it fun? also yes. do they like doing it only to each other and nobody else? YES.#their psych is genuinely so fun to explore and dissect#I had a lot of fun making these despite how deranged they look#something about them.... it drives both to do things they would never even consider doing to anybody else... but towards each other#you know what i mean? or am i just yapping nonsense again.#horror#the stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#tsp#tspud#tsp au#tsp narrator#narrator tsp#stanley tsp#tsp stanley
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Brotherās Babysitter AU Masterlist
Choso x slightly fem!reader Full Masterlist
I try to keep it gender neutral but sometimes I slip into fem (sorry!!)
ā means personal favorite
Initial idea
When heās off work (+ Gojo mention)
Picnic (ft. Gojo and Megumi)
Yujiās end-of-school party (ft. Yuki)
Roller skating (req)
Unckunaās Visit part 2 3 4 5
Fireworks
āSick
Park (ft. Gojo and Megumi)
āDance
Wearing his shirt
Shoe shopping for Yuji
Hide and seek
Doctorās appointment
Night
āJust the boys
āTeaching him how to bake
Teaching you how to skateboard
Road trip
Ice skating (req)
Yujiās āAll About Meā assignment (kechizu and eso mention)
Mall with friends (no Choso or Yuji)
Makeup
āMarriedā (req)
I Went On A Date With My Brotherās Babysitter
Halloween!!
Taglist (ask to join anytime): @samaraxmorgan @cherriee-ee @auor4 @chaotic-ish @meowsannie
@mediokerrv @flooftoof @dazaisfavgf @mysteriaqueen
#brothers babysitter au#źØ zero yaps a lot#sorry taglist people I wanted it all in one place rather than my drafts#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk choso#jjk choso kamo#jujutsu kaisen choso#jujutsu kaisen choso kamo#choso fluff#choso kamo fluff#choso#choso kamo#choso x reader#choso kamo x reader#kamo choso
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try to be gentle when you are ripping me apart šŖ
w/ @kashisun
#ts4#simblr#the sims community#sims 4 edit#ts4 edit#oc: naomi#oc: nadia#lethal devotion#mysims#HII <3#im back with my toxic yuri vampires but where they're humans in a rock band instead#who hate each other but secretly want to rip each other apart#nie is the drummer and nadia is the lead singer#nadia had her teeth filed into fangs when she was a teenager and nie looks like she bites THEYRE PERFECT#nadia absolutely LOVES fan service and will purposely flirt with fans just to get a rise out of nie#and nie would corner her later while nadia's smiling down at her loving every second of nie yelling at her#nie would be her little guard dog too yapping at everyones feet#nie LOVES to fight there's no better place she's feels more confident and herself than with her knuckles split open#and someone elses blood covering her#there'd be moments the fans would get too rough with nadia nd nie would freak out their other band mates would have to hold her back#to let security take care of it#and tell her how she can't afford to go to jail again they have a tour to think about#nadia would flirt unashamedly with nie too just to piss her#'bite me' 'you'd like to that wouldn't you baby girl'#GHHHGJFHFJJ#THEYRE MAKING ME SICK#okay imagine the song I linked is about hot lesbians instead of god
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āthe black bastard of the wallā moniker is the exact opposite of the āwhite wolfā moniker and this perfectly highlights the irreconcilable differences between book Jon and show Jon
#āwhite wolfā highlights his stark heritage parallels him to robb and tries to align him with perfect moral goodness#āthe black bastard of the wallā is only about jon. it has nothing to do with his stark heritage nor ghost. itās only about jon#itās literally white vs black#stark/winterfell/moral goodness vs bastard (targaryen bastard to be specific)/the wall/moral greyness and the duality of it all#heās already a snow and heās surrounded by white up north with a white direwolf so being the black bastard and dressing all in black#is perfect imagery of the duality theme in jonās storyline#d&d rly wanted their jon to always stand in robbās shadow š#while book jon has an international reputation while still stuck at the wall#my boy is stuck in westerosi alaska and heās got ppl across the sea yapping about him for pastime#thatās fame baby#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#GOT critical#jon snow#book jon snow#and i wanna know what other monikers george plans to give jon#while i wouldnāt be that suprised if the āwhite wolfā did come from george itās the way itās jonās only moniker in GOT that pisses me off#āthe black bastard of the wallā supremacy#the white wolf seems kinda lame in comparison but say jon gets it if his hair turns white like some theorize#if that happens then iāll like it more cause itāll be about jon!#likeā¦ the young wolf is about robb. not grey wind. the starks are compared to wolves and robb is a young king and he just so happens to have#a direwolf. in the show jonās āwhite wolfā moniker is honestly more about ghost than jon! and thatās ughhh#but robb had the wolf moniker first so it feels once again like the showrunners were placing jon in robbās shadow#UGHHH I HATE THE SHOW AND HOW IT RUINED THE WAY SO MANY PPL VIEW THE CHARACTERS#let jon be the black bastard !!#his color was always black and the wall is his !!#put some respect on his name and his badass moniker#i donāt want to see anymore shit about the white wolf cause thatās only d&dās shit invention at this point#valyrianscrolls
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people's champignon
#kƤƤrijƤ#kaarija#2024#i enjoyed people's champion the most#but overall i have conflicted feelings on the album bc 4 some reason its mixed weird and i dont like the sound of half of the songs#i love the concept and rawness of it but at the same time i relate to the opinion that its a filler album to cement your place#solid 7 out of 10 for me#and now i can go disappear in datv its been nice knowing you#turns out im not done yapping in the tags#i really didnt want to use any green in this one but somewhat muddy kaarijavihrea found its place anyway#and i think it suits the mood yk kaarija is inescapable and party never ends idk#im rotating him in my brain
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On top of being robbed of so much Juke content weāll never get, what I think about alot is how Juke would have been approached more if it went further.
One of the (many) reasons I love jatp so much is it makes me believe their characters are real, that they have background, they have their own goals and ambitions to them, theyāre fleshed out.
That moment of Flynn going āmy girls got a crush and his name is Lukeā and Julie going āwhat no?! Lukeās a ghostš³.ā And Flynn saying āa cute ghostā and Julie giving in and saying āā¦with a perfect smileāŗļøā and adding that Luke is ācute airā which implies she has indeed given this Luke crush idea some thought.
That moment of just two best friends talking about the others potential crush like thatās such a good moment bc I genuinely believe that I am watching these two genuine besties just have that kind of talk with one another bc that happens!
Like that moment we have with our friends when theyāre like āhey I got something to tell you šā or they approach you like āsoā¦ ummā¦ Iāve been kind of noticing your behavior lately around this person.ā Itās the realistic little things like that which is why I appreciate this show so much.
Julie having the line of āwhat no! Lukeās a ghost!ā Means so much that, on top of acknowledging āhey heās got a cute smile, and he himself is cuteā she also acknowledged ļæ½ļæ½ā¦he is a ghost thoughā¦ā but then our Julie being who she is (we love her for it) went ābut he still do be cute though š„°ā like this is a genuine teen girl in high school having a crush
And then later on when Reggie and Alex bring up how Luke and Julie ooze chemistry (and the way that throughout the show when Julie and Luke are being cute and them, the looks that we see Reggie and Alex give like Juke and then each other is so good bc I genuinely believe like āyeah these boys are all friends with one another so of course theyād react that way to their other friend showing an interest in their fellow friendā) Lukeās like āno come on I have chemistry with everyone I sing withā HE DOES THE SAME THING JULIE DID WHEN THE EXACT SAME TOPIC EAS BROUGHT UP TO HER! (Soulmates your honor!)
Him denying it, like Julie did, implies too that he also had the thinking of āā¦she is alive though and Iām notā (I mean me personally I feel like Luke didnāt truly realize he liked her until later on even if there were signs earlier, just bc he seems like the kind of person where like music was his absolute everything like even if the Sunset Curve fangirls were always like āomg Luke is amazing šā, I just get the vibe that he would never really notice the advances towards him bc he is just so consumed in music and that is his whole existence, so when Reggie and Alex see that Luke appears to be falling for Julie itās a big deal bc theyāre probably like āLuke has NEVER shown any interest ever so the fact that a girl has replaced music in his life THIS IS A MASSIVE DEALā)
And then the moment when theyāre on Julieās porch and she tries to hold his hand but ya know CANT (huge what a gut punched) and then she awkwardly looks away and heās like āā¦this is an interesting little relationship you and I haveā and theyāre just there for a moment just looking and smiling at each other (THEYāRE FLIRTING SO MUCH WITHOUT SAYING ANY WORDS UGH TAKE ME š©)
I am sat there genuinely believing that these are two teenagers who even though they know theyāre not *supposed* to feel a way about each other, they still do. Like that scene is their confession to one another and itās so sweet and genuine bc in that moment where Julie tries to hold his hand, theyāre brought back to reality as to what they are and yet, they canāt help but still like one another and appreciate each other bc of what the other person has changed so much in their life.
AND THEN, that scene in the beginning of the last episode how Julie asks to talk to Luke (and Reggie and Alex immediately are like āoop leave them be š theyāre having a momentā being the greatest friends that they are) and theyāre both standing there, in each others presence, it takes a moment for Julie to say what she wants to but theyāre just two kids who ended up in each others lives and they know they like each other but they know they canāt act on those feelings yet they still just have this love for each other is so enduring and charming. The way Luke tells her āanything Julie you know thatā MAKES ME MELT like ugh š© their dynamic and friendship has grown so much with each other from episode 1 to like now and itās so just ugh it gets me
When I think how Juke could have been approached if we had gotten a chance, I would have loved to see the new like āglowing touchā development and how that would impact their dynamic. (I just imagine Reggie just hugs Julie all the time bc he can (he just seems like such a hugger and I feel like heād give good onesš„ŗ) and Alex also will gives her side hugs (they just take advantage of being able to physically touch her bc they donāt know how long theyāre able to do it for with their new ghost development)) I feel like Luke and Julie would just be a bit apprehensive since the hand holding thing on the porch, and maybe their hug was just a one time thing.
Would have loved to see Carlos referring to Luke as āJulieās boyfriendā (he was there for edge of great and stand tall THERES NO WAY heās thinking anything of than āthe sleeveless one is indeed my sisters boyfriendā) would be extra great too with like Luke being in the room and Carlos just says that and Julie quickly trying to make him not talk about it bc itās embarrassing š her just being like āCarlos, heās a ghostā and him being like āā¦hey with you having a boyfriend are you going to have less time with Dad and I bc youāll be busy kissing him?ā And Julieās face just goes pale as Luke takes the time to take himself out of room meanwhile his face his like bright red
Would have loved to see when Carrieās redemption is happening and itās Julie and Carrie and Carrieās like āsooooo š Iāve seen how you look at your guitaristā and she immediately tries to shut it down but Carrie is like āJules, we may not have been that close in the past year and some but weāve known each other for how long? I can see your tells!ā
I just think a lot about how this ship, even though theyāre not meant to like each other yet they do and still care about each other, would have been approached more if we got the chance
#I just wanted to yap I apologize ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½#OMG I forget to mention the locker scene ā¦probably for the best Iāve been yapping too much already no one wants more of that š#probably could have been saved for a juke juedi but everyday is juke juedi to me#I know I kept repeating how I like genuinely believe these characters are real people but bc there are so many times where fictional#things like youāre watching it and are like āthat would never happenā or āno one would do that irlā but with jatp there is not one point#at all where your brain goes to that which speaks volumes with how good the writing is and how good of performances are in it like UGH#I LOVE IT (also I took a āfilm as artā class and in that thereās a term called āwillfullness of disbeliefā where you as the viewer know#that these are actors playing charcaters and theyāre on a set HOWEVER in the media you are viewing you are willing to put that aside and#view it as taking in the set as an actual place and the actors ARE their characters)#in Jatp it makes me believe that like all our gang are real people bc of how well theyāre portrayed and written itās just so cool to me š„°#julie and the phantoms#jatp#jatp netflix#jatp julie#jatp luke#juke#jatp juke#jukebox
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for my money, labru is head and shoulders above other ships involving them simply due to the unmatched yap potential, i imagine them feeding off each other's energy like they're slipstreaming in mario kart until they start going fast enough to break the sound barrier
#dungeon meshi#dunmesh spoilers#labru#the Compounding Yap Effect#thinking about kabru wanting to understand the value of monsterhood despite how much pain they caused him ...#laios wanting to understand the value of humanity despite how much pain they caused him ...#none of this even mentioning how much kabru needs a person like laios to spur his character growth#kabru is a schemy schemer who schemes and it's one of his best qualities#but it's also what gets him killed over and over again in an attempt to get closer to laios and co when none of his usual tricks worked#it took until the absolute 11th hour where kabru HAD to choose#between potentially unlocking the secrets of the dungeon or giving it up to the canaries and losing his chance forever#if kabru had fallen back on what he knew he would have killed laios then and never got what he wanted#laios forcing kabru to be honest with his feelings#(a feeling kabru had buried so deep he was barely aware he had it in the first place)#is what finally gets laios to stop and listen#and he finally gives kabru enough of a reason to trust him and make kabru stop the canaries and give the party time to escape#and it's ONLY then that kabru is able to get what he wants#legit i cant imagine a more fulfilling ending for kabru than getting to directly engage his interest in a way that directly helps people#with someone who both needs wants and sincerely appreciates his skills#literally riding off into the sunset gay ass ending im#im going to be sick#day 28 being normal about them
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#hotd#rhaenicent#rhaenicent meme#but im worried#i feel like hotd is all over the place rn since end of s2#i dont want them to prioritise rhaenicent over other plots#i dont want other and important plots to be erased or for characters personalities and stuff to change#etc etc#I want rhaenicent but im okay with crumbs as long as its a beautiful tragic slow burn that still keeps the individual characters as themsel#ran out of tag typing space bc i yap too much om#house of the dragon#alicent hightower#rhaenyra targeryan#hotd s2#alicent x rhaenyra#alicent hightower x rhaenyra targaryen#hotd alicent#hotd rhaenyra#old rhaenicent#because young rhaenicent was perfect but theyre gone now and older rhaenicent needs to follow in their perfect footsteps
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NEW WEEK MORE POSTS! Letās talk about Home for Joke!
Joke has never had a Home; he lived in his parents house as an unwanted guest (his father quite literally says he thinks Joke isnāt his son because he isnāt smart enough). Then he lived in jail, where we know he was constantly harassed. He now has that small apartment next to Tattoo, that from what weāve seen has like one futon and a chair in it.
However, from the jump we see how at home Joke feels at Jackās place. He falls asleep in Jacks bed, helps tidy up. Constantly staying as long as possible. When Jack invites Joke back over after forgiving him he is ELATED to be allowed back. So when Grandma asks when Joke is going homeā¦.
Not only is it a reminder that his parents probably donāt want to see him.
But it also probably feels like a rejection, that they donāt see this as Jokeās home. That he DOESNāT have a home here. Heās a guest, he doesnāt belong there. He knows both of their kindness too, so I imagine he might be wondering if heās ACTUALLY wanted there. Luckily Grandma and Jack catch on pretty fast
Itās the first time itās really laid out WHY a rich boy has spent all his time there. Hoy brought up suspicion to Tattoo before (which i loved) but this is it spelled out to others. Grandma offering a place there, in such a calm collected way, and Jack backing it up must have been SO overwhelming. The feeling of being given a soft place to land for an indefinite time?
Yeah it would easily bring me to tears. Joke is clearly in his 20ās and this is the first time that not only he HAS a Home, but one was offered because he was WANTED there.
And I think the realization has occurred to Jack too
#jack and joker#jack and joker: u steal my heart#jack & joker#jack & joker: u steal my heart!#I think Jack realizing here how much having a place means to Joke contributes a LOT to his botched confession at the end of the episode but#ill make another post about the confession#probably tomorrow#ahhhh more posting#i have so many thoughts and feelings#i might go through my backlog and tag all my posts ive put tags on#in case anyone wants to read them#PLEASE IF YOU WANNA TALK THIS SHOW SLIDE IN TALK TO ME#ILL YAP ENDLESSLY#lyricposts#lyric posts#j&j
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zonked out on the dog bed snoring up a storm. you come over and rub the soft spot on the top of my nose. i let out the most contented sigh
#blllllaggggh busiest doggy everyday of my life and i am exhausted#ye beware of sadposting ahead. more like just need to get thoughts out of my headposting yk. im ok just tired#friend said to me today 'youre always doing something these days jasper when do you rest?'#and i was like huh good question! i dont hahaha. damn#which is not a bad thing always. but my plate is incredibly full and i have no one to help me#im in a really good place. things are happening that ive wanted to happen for years. but i have no time to take care of me#and the ppl who are supposed to take care of me dont. and they let me down everytime i try to ask for it. which im used to#but it doesnt make it any easier. theres just not enough hours in the day and not enough energy in my little doggy body#i used to be able to push myself past the wall of exhaustion. but after my therapy program ik i just can not do that anymore#im really proud of myself. being an adult is hard. im doing everything right. but i just wish i had someone by my side to help me#anyways.#i am a very good boy#yapping#if youre reading this hi im just venting im fine. its just been a long day and i want someone to give me a head massage#jasperbarks
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hi sorry yall really havent been able to escape these guys huh??? ;u; i saw a cute yume october prompt list and i knew i wanted to try some of them! the day 1 prompt is āfirst meetingā!
primotalii broke into the blueberry yogurt academyās library in the middle of the night just toā¦ā¦. readā¦? okay man.
#primotalii infodump time#YES!!!!! GOD YES I KNOW YOU ALL WERE WAITING FOR THIS /j#he didnāt have a formal education so he tries to learn stuff on his ownā¦he likes books with pictures bc he had to teach himself how to read#shadow milk (before corruption) helped him Properly Learn after it came up in convo like. 3 weeks in knowing eachother. they hung out with#eachother in the library sm and they were both doing their own āstudiesā AND ALL THAT TIME PRIMO COULDNT FUCKING READ?????????#LIKE WHAT. WAS HE DOING. ?????? (trying his best š)#primo in general has a very unbreakable spirit like heās not one to give up on things! which is why he never mentioned it to SMC#i love him sm heās so silly#he lits grew up in the woods like he doesnāt care for social standards at all. he just does what he wants! which is why he broke into the#library in the first place bc he didnāt KNOW the library is an open access place in the daytime#okay iām done i prommy#shadow milk cookie#oc: primotalii#oc x canon#cookie run kingdom#crk fanart#mystuff#HOOLY SHIT MR YAPS A LOT#sbksdkfbf sowwy iām at a hall party rn and iām a biiiiit bored#OKAY OKAY BYYEEEEE LOVE YALL!!!!!#shadowtalii#blueberry milk cookie
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#can i yap for a moment#im extremely sleepy but im feeling very upset and mad and confused#also lowkey questioning whether me feeling all that is justified or if i am overreacting#anyway#made out w a boy tonight#and he wanted to go to his place#and i was like no i wanna stay and dance with my girlies#and he gets upset??#asking why i'd kiss him if i don't wanna hook up and i said i just wanna have fun?#made me feel so stupid#that anger in me led to a little fight with another boy (who was unfortunately very cute) and i just wanted to punch him#i just hate when boys think they're so superior#so i argued with this stupid but hot man#until an ex? friend shows up and he was pretty drunk just yapping about things#anyway he basically told me he'd like to rekindle our friendship#but not in a heyy haven't talked in so long let's meet up again#it was in a heyy let's hang out again got a new big car and moved out of my parent's house š#which gave me the ick bc that's why we aren't friends anymore and i told him no multiple times#and got sad bc he was one of my closest friends#anyway and then we left the party#this guy pulls me aside the parking lot#and i was so embarrassed bc there were so many people and they were all looking and i could already see people gossiping about it#and i just wanted to die#and then he just CONFESSES??#gives me flowers and all which is saur saur cute#but i legit have zero feelings for him </3#and have commitment issues and have never been in a relationship and don't wanna be in one#actually grosses me out thinking about relationships </3#the confession was so random and i kinda lost another friendship? even tho i wouldn't rlly consider him a friend we just share sum classes#but yeah boys are so stupid and confusing and i dunno how and why i get myself into these situations :') m sorry just needed to rant </3
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the day the earth stood still is the day i felt your presence leave it, and then every day after that.
#tw grief#sigh sigh sigh.#apologies in advance as this is not the happiest yap ! i would just like to write out some of my feelings on this day#the heaviest heart weighs under an insurmountable amount of grief ā the ghost of love#days like today are a twisted reminder that has every emotion flooding through your soul#longing . guilt . anger . an indescribable melancholy that could only be consoled through the sands of time#a year ago i lost my best guy friend and itās never really gotten easier . but ive heard it never does#all i can do is bundle up the love i have for him and search for him in the clouds that take up the sky#the circumstances around his passing will never not haunt me and rather than go into it all iād like to say is this#if you have a loved one or a relationship or a friendship you cherish .. then never ever stop fighting for it - for them.#as time never really seems to be on our side#each day iāll live as he intended . to greet the world with kindness and a smile and passion for positivity#in his wisest words (or rather after every phone call weād have hehe) iāll try my best to stay awesome & encourage you all to do so as well#if youāve read this then iām taking your hand and thanking you#it didnāt feel right not acknowledging him at all on this blog . heās the one that introduced me to anime + more importantly : one piece#i wish i could talk to him about it all so he could see how far down this rabbit hole i fell just as he had done#will be spending the day enjoying his favorite episodes and being gentle with the world that surrounds us#this is not like my usual yaps & i feel vulnerable posting it but i wanted to carve out a space for him on this blog#forever missing the connie to my sasha . maybe in another universe weāll get it right#have a wonderful sunday my sweet friendz and if you can ā hug your loved ones & blow a kiss up to the sky š¤š«#thank you for being here & helping me make this a safe place .#āĖā¹ į° xoxo aims
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