#and i wanna start with like. kitten fosters or something

[alveolaraspergillosis]

“cats are solitary creatures u shouldn’t get ur cat a second cat to befriend because u think it’s lonely it’s probably fine” no u don’t understand, she spent her first couple months of being a house animal on learning how The Indoors work and by the time she got used to the apartment (and me) she had a friend. for over two years. and now her friend is gone and she doesn’t know what to do with herself when i’m not home .

[lindsay00000008]

Ghost x Fem!Reader

Part 1 (Next)

CW: panty-thief, suggestive fluff

DownBad!Simon Ghost Riley who just loves handling the frustrating, mundane, mildly-anxiety-inducing issues in JustAFriend!Reader’s life.

For a man who’s been through… everything, nothing phases him. Not the phone call to pressure your old landlord into giving you back your deposit, not the broken dryer and the giant pile of wet laundry that needs to be hung in increasingly ridiculous locations, not the stray cat birthing a mewling litter on your doorstep in the middle of winter, or the neighborhood’s package thief stealing your delivery of what may be something electric and flower-shaped.

If you didn’t know any better (you don’t), you’d say he gets a kick out of it, how easily he handled these things compared to you. His take-no-bullshit demeanor, coupled with the respect afforded to those who earn it, smooths things over fairly quickly with difficult people.

He’s handy and likes taking things apart — he’s sure you won’t miss the dusty lace panties he finds slipped under the dryer’s barrel when he bullies the metal frame open (they were your favorite, where on earth did they go??)

When the kittens are a few weeks old and Simon comes to visit with more supplies, they snuggle up under his chin as he slumps on the rug, the furious blush from your earlier teasing (“Daddy’s home!”) warming him from his cheeks to his toes and making him the most cozy spot in the room. He waves off the offer of a hot drink and tells you to “Open a window or sumin’, the lil’ bastards are smotherin’ me”.

When he catches the package thief red-handed on his way up to your door — a fourty-something woman who talks at him louder and meaner than anyone has in a long while — he gives his best impression of a bull at the edge of an unmarked field, making his territory known with a wild look rather than words. When he sets the package down on the kitchen counter, along with the ingredients for tonight’s Thursday Dinner Experiment, he prompts you to open it. “Wanna see what my hard work has earned ya.”

You slice the tape and pop open the cardboard before you remember — and slam the flaps back down. That has his attention. “Whatcha got there, lovie?” He crowds in behind you, looking over your shoulder and grinning, lopsided so you can only see the smirk on the left of his mouth when you turn your head to stammer, “uhh n-nothing, just this stupid book someone recommended me. Can’t let the gang know I fuck with hockey romance, haha.”

“Hockey, huh?” He huffs and leans his elbow on the counter, half of his body still behind you somehow. You pull the box close to your chest, hands shifting to best keep it closed.

“Lemme just take this to my room and we can start making-“

“You’d deprive a man of valuable literary experience?”

“No, nuh-uh,” you dance away as he grabs for it teasingly, fast enough to make you panic but not too fast you can’t get away. A play fight. Your pulse thrums fast in your chest, like it always does when he gets that calculating glint in his eye. It’s thrilling, the way his shoulders shift and settle low, and his touch comes gentle and fast, his face a terrifying mask with that piercing glint of playfulness just barely hidden. You usually love this game. But he cannot see this.

His hand rushes towards you as you skirt backwards into the living room, his fingers tangling in the tape hanging from the box. It tears away and you shriek a laugh at his efforts, leaving him with nothing but another opening as you twist to run to your room. But you don’t count on another opponent entering the ring: the rug — trundled up the stairs by the man himself, the previous one sacrificed to the God of Foster Cats — still new and curling at the edge.

He must not expect it either. Before you’ve fully turned you’re falling into the couch, catching his arm in a bid to save yourself. He goes down too, landing atop you. Your “Oomph”s mingle together in the suddenly still air. His big body makes it impossible to breathe until he lifts up on his arms and takes stock of the situation. He eyes snag on the box where it’s fallen, the shiny inner box and red packing grass spilled out on the rug. You attempt to wriggle out before he sees. Your legs are firmly pinned between his own. You wait for him to laugh.

“Well that,” he breathes, not a giggle in sight. He settles his eyes on you with a look of hot reproach. “That is not a book.”

He hopes it’s broken. That’s a problem of yours he’d love to have a hand in solving.

(Next)

[mialikeshockey]

Jet - Luke Hughes

part two, to oli

requested by @hrts4edwards

(credit to gif maker)

Luke’s birthday is right around the corner, he’s always talked about getting a dog. Jack and Quinn said that was something he’s always wanted since he was a kid, was a dog.

After all of the foster kittens went to their forever homes, Jack and I have been talking about surprising Luke with a puppy. Jacks always talking about how much Luke has wanted a Shih tzu, so Jack and I got him a Shih tzu.

It’s currently Lukes birthday, I woke up early and started making him a birthday breakfast. In a couple minutes Jack would be bringing over the Shih tzu for Luke.

I flip the French toast that’s on the stove, while Luke walks out of the bedroom. “Good morning, birthday boy.” I smile, while he walks over to me and gives me a kiss on my cheek.

“What are you making?” He questions me getting out some cups to make the coffee I haven’t started on yet. “French toast. Sorry if it’s not what you wanted, it’s just one of our favorite things so, I thought it would be special for your special day.”

Luke just smiles and helps finish everything up. “Why is there more plates out?” Luke looks around, confused. “Your brothers and Nico are coming over.”

Before Luke or I could say another word, someone knocks on the door. “I’ll get it.” Luke walks over to the door and lets Nico and Quinn in the door. “I thought you said Jack was coming too?” Luke pokes his head out of the door frame to see if his brother was left behind in the hallway, but not a sight of the other Hughes was there.

“Jack said he’ll be a little late because of traffic.” Nico states walking over to give me a hug. “Why didn’t he just go with you guys?” Luke says sassly. Quinn tries not to giggle while looking over at me who’s putting food on everyone’s plates. “Come on, eat up while we wait for Jack.” I push Lukes plate in front of him.

After everyone done with eating, Nico helps me do dishes while Quinn keeps Luke busy. “Whys Jack so late?” I ask Nico who’s drying the freshly washed dishes I’m handing him. “He’s probably waiting for the right-.” Before Nico could finish his sentence, there was knocking on the door. “Luke could you get that?” I call out to my boyfriend.

Luke stands up and walks to the door, he opens the door to see Jack standing there with a puppy and a big smile on his face. “So you took so long to buy yourself a new puppy, on my birthday.” Luke laughs while letting Jack in.

“Actually…it’s not mine.” Jack hands Luke the puppy. “Wha-.” Before Luke could say anything fully the puppy licks him. “Happy birthday little bro.” Jack smiles. “Thank you.” Luke walks over to show me.

“You’ve been talking about wanting one, so I talked to everyone about it and we all got together and got it for you. Also because it hasn’t been easy with all the cats leaving, it will give Oli a brother.” I dry my hands off and go up to pet the puppy.

Luke lets the puppy go run around to get his zoomies out so everyone could play with him.

“What are you gonna name him, sweetheart?” Luke takes a second to think. “Jet, I think Jet fits.” Luke giggles watching Jet run back and forth between Nicos legs to Quinns.

After a couple minutes of everyone playing with the dog, they all left, to get ready for Lukes party. “Do you wanna nap before we go? You didn’t sleep well last night.” I ask him, seeing the tiredness on his face. “Honestly…that would be great.”

Luke walks to the bedroom while little Jet follows behind him,Oli staying behind with me. I pick Oli up and head to the room and walk into Jet being cuddled up to Luke already.

“Looks like I have someone who has stolen my boyfriend.” I giggle, petting Jet. Luke smiles and closes his eyes before he drifts off to sleep.

Maybe being an animal mom isn’t bad. Maybe Oli and Jet are all we need.

—

this is so bad but I’m so bored at 5am right now and this has been in my drafts since Luna and I were on FaceTime the other night so I thought I’d let her wake up to this. I’ll probably go back and edit it, later in the day because I did not proofread this 😭

[erosjournal]

‧₊˚໒꒱ ~ luciana sammy-esperanza valdez - daughter of hephaestus

────────────────────────────────────────────

"but i wanna feel all that love and emotion" - people watching

luciana sammy-esperanza valdez was born on july 7th, 1994

her middle name was originally just "sammy" but she changed it once she got older to honor her mom

pronounced "lusiana" and her mom always called her "lucy/luci"

definitely pulled a percy once, "i'm the daughter of esperanza valdez!"

her mom never tried to date/remarry because 1. it'd suck on luciana's behalf, and 2. she could never love someone like the man she once did

has a slight mexican/spanish accent, though it really only comes out when she's yelling/very mad. she also has a very noticable texan accent.

got put in ELD as a kid as a sort of racist thing, also because almost no one could understand her through her stumble of words + her accents

she grew out of her spanish accent though as she grew up

uses duolingo now to relearn the language

once her mom died, she ran far. her family didn't accept her, so she was going to live on her own

i'd say she had gotten through at least 2 states from running and being transferred to foster home

has a fear of people raising their hands near her since her abusive foster mom, teressa?, fucked her up

the last thing from her mother was a bracelet that was orange and bronze (gives it to juliette as a promise of love. juliette refuses to keep it, but luciana persists. as sort of, a promise to not die. to not lose the bracelet, the only way to lose it is... to die again)

on multiple occasions, growing up she'd accidentally lit something on fire and people called her a demon

grew up catholic. still has some beliefs, but not much

knew she was a lesbian, from a very young age, and her mom accepted her

meeting piper was the best, another queer girl who wasn't white, and they became immediately like siblings

never liked juliette (romantically) at first, until after piper and juliette started dating

when she first fired !! ACCIDENTALLY !! at new rome, juliette stood up for her. remember when i said juliette would do anything to stop harm? well, apparently luciana isn't harm to new rome... :0

hated being the only one working on the ship, with the romantic couples around her

calls juliette stupid/sappy pet names and nick names: "jay" "julie" "baby girl" "cupcake" "puppy" "kitten" "jules" "lesbian babe" "girl kisser" etc.

I HOPE U GUYS LIKED THIS ONE TOO!! SORRY ITS NOT SO DEEP IN THE PAST, BUT I GOT TIRED LMAO

I'LL MAKE ONE ABT THEIR RELATIONSHIP!!!

[hee-blee-art]

are there any specific ocs your rotating in your brain rn that you wanna talk about ✨👀

yes! always :)

recently I've been thinking a lot about my toyhouse corners guys as I continue working on their comic, especially basil, alfred, foster, and mac :) coincidentally (or not so) they're the four of the cast who do the most yearning and pining and of course I'm very normal about all that (that's a lie they all make me insane). I can't wait to reveal more about them, I could (and will) talk about them for ages (any questions always welcome, I'll try not to spoil anything too big). particularly I've been thinking about basil's past, his complex troubles with getting close to people, and his relationship to whisk, a troubled kitten who he sees a lot of his younger self in and may or may not be fixated on trying to help because he wishes he could somehow reach though time and help himself when he was a kitten in a similar position to her. all in all I am very excited to keep putting those guys in situations (there will be a candyland, a creepy safety village-esque town, and a mirage-like travelling megastore called appleworld in their future).

I've also been thinking (as I often do) about my tragic fantasy gays, sebastian & konstantine. I've been busy enriching their world with lore and planning out their story so I can start (yet another) draft for the first book of the grey circle, and with that comes a lot of thinking about those two, the haunted prince & his begrudgingly valiant knight who knows him better than anyone and yet cannot know him fully because of his unfathomable secret... oh, there's just something so intimate about being doomed by the narrative and bound together, done part by none, not even death <3 they're very enemies to lovers in a "we're on the same side but I can't stand you but I also can't stand to be without you and if anyone messes with you I'll kill them" way, which I can't get enough of myself.

also! the grey circle has lots of characters I haven't posted about nearly as much but are so dear to me and that I oft rotate in my brain, like ilèan & cainiph, who are a very skilled fairy princess with truly profound mommy issues and cain-and-abel vibes with her sister & an adrenaline junkie bounty hunter who is a bit of a hothead and accidently becomes a werewolf :) another mismatched pair that end up needing each other as much as air. and of course, gren & bain, the little mousy halfling-type creatures who are inseparable best friends in love beyond words, a sly bartender & a leisure-loving bard respectively, both incredibly curious and brave beyond credit, setting out to right a wrong and solve an old family mystery. I think about the grey circle very often, it's one of my favourite little worlds to visit in my head & I can't wait until I have something written that allows others to visit as well :)

the last herd of ocs I've been preoccupied with lately are my room & board cast, the characters for a comic idea I have about silly and bizarre sci-fi/fantasy comic about alternate-dimension-faring roommates travelling in a house-turned-spaceship in search of a (the?) holy grail. they're all old ocs of mine (6+ years I think) that I've rebooted a few different times, and returning to them after some years off feels like reconnecting with old friends as cheesy as that sounds. I genuinely missed them, and I'm excited to be messing about with a story for them again, even if it's just for fun. I've especially been thinking about the main(est) character, martin, and how her journey with transness fits into their larger existential and relentlessly silly adventures.

thnks for offering the stage to talk about my ocs! I love talking about them but I'm not always sure anyone wants to hear, but perhaps it's time I curb that mindset and just start putting more out there because it's fun for me :) also! if anyone reads all this, first of all thnk you for indulging me, and second I am genuinely always open to hearing about other people's ocs, whether through ask or dm or whatever! I know it can be intimidating to just reach out of the blue but I really do love talking about people's characters / stories / creations and I am always open to it. maybe I ought to make some more dedicated venue for that sort of thing but yeah casual oc chat is always an option! I hope anyone who sees this has a wonderful day / night :)

[violetkatgrove]

BumbleClan: Half a Year in

Hello and welcome to my tumblr kitty Lets Play

Everything will be under a readmore for convenience but here's a picture of the current clan

CW: There is Cat/Kitten death

We're skipping moon 0-1 because I didn't write anything down and dont wanna use up all the image slots on this post but things of note:

Mudfur(our 1 elder) sprained her foot and Stoatkit got a runny nose, and Stoatskip left fresh kill at the starting StarClan cat's grave.

Moon 2:

Stoatkit's running nose is gone.

Squirrelkit & Stoatkit hatch a plan to sneak out of camp, BUT Sunstar promises to take Stoatkit out of camp if he behaves.

Golddawn and Sunstar have a difficult conversation and now have a deeper understand of each other.

Stoatskip and Fawnroot had a huge argument about something

Patrols:

While patrolling the border, Hazelbloom and Moonpaw notice a patrol from OrioleClan renewing their scent marks up ahead/ When the two patrols get closer to each other, the patrol leaders share a quick nod of acknowledgement. The patrols refocus on their tasks without stopping for a conversation, but feel a mutual respect has been fostered

Gracklegorse and Stoatskip look around for something to disguise their scent while hunting. With the help of a stinky bush, their hunt goes without issue.

Goldawn goes on a mission to find lungwort now that Newleaf is here. As the only cure for yellowcough, She's determined that BumbleClan can replenish their stocks on it, and takes Fawnfoot along to help. The cats search and search until their pawpads are sore, but they are unable to locate any lungwort. Golddawn returns to camp disappointed, but determined to try again. It's simply too important to not keep a good supply of.

Moon 3:

Mudfur's starting to recover from her sprain, and Golddawn and Fawnroot have recovered from the pervious moon's soreness.

Hazelbloom has suffered bruising after tripping over a small trunk.

Stoatpaw has reached 6 moons and has become an apprentice under Sunstar's mentorship.

Stoatskip and Golddawn hatch a plan to sneak out of camp together🤨

Thoughts/In-Camp actions:

Sunstar tries to set a good example for her deputy, Gracklegorse is assigning cats to the dawn patrol.

Stoatskip leaves fresh-kill at Bushrush's grave once more.

Stoatpaw is rambling to Squirrelkit about the importance of respecting their elders. Squirrelkit is trying to hide from other cats.

Stoatpaw is only 1 moon older than Squirrelkit so i think this is hilarious

Patrols(Where shit goes wrong):

Sunstar suggests this might be a good chance to practice new fighting techniques with Stoatpaw. Both cats have a nice training session, Sunstar teaching her best tips and tricks to her apprentice.

Hazelbloom, Stoatskop, and Moonpaw patrol the territory, as they are checking border lines, they hear an odd sound coming from a nearby bush. Before Hazelbloom can move to check the bush, a loner emerges with their newborn kits. The cat explains that they would like to join the Clan and after a short conversation, they bring the loner and their family back to camp.

Gracklegorse and Fawnroot go hunting. As they are checking the border lines, they hear an odd sound coming from a nearby bush. Fawnroot takes the lead in checking the source of the noise and comes face to face with a snarling wolverine! Fawnroot yowls for Gracklegorse but he isn't quick enough to stop the wolverine from killing them with a quick and deadly swipe.

Moon 4:

Squrrilpaw has reached apprenticehood and decides to work as a medicine cat, Golddawn loves her determination and egarness to learn, and agrees to take her on as her apprentice.

Sunstar rests their muzzle on Moonthistle's head and declares him to be a full warrior of BumbleClan, honoring his realism.

The past moon, Fawnroot has taken their place in StarClan. BumbleClan mourns their loss, and his Clanmates will miss the spot he took in their lives.

Hazelbloom's bruises have gone away, and Gracklegorse, while still mourning, has recovered from the shock of Fawnroot's death.

Squirrelpaw and Stoatpaw swap their favorite prey, while Havenkit tries to challenge the former to a spar.

Gracklegorse is hoping Sunstar will notice him🤨

Buzzardkit looks up to Sunstar and would like to spend more time with her!

Thoughts/In-Camp actions:

Gracklegorse wonders if StarClan has given Golddawn any prophecies lately🥺😭

Squirrelpaw starts to wonder if she's cut out to be a medicine cat.

Golddawn and Hazelbloom have taken a liking to Havenkit.

Stoatskip prays to Starclan that next season will be a good one.

Moonthistle offers to lead the next patrol out.

Patrols:

Moonthistle, Sunstar, and Stoatpaw patrol the territory. The patrol hears the screaming of a cat begging for their twolegs to come back and the sound of a monster speeding away. They discover the kittypet run over by a monster trying to go after their Twolegs. Sunstar sends a prayer for them and can't help but to curse the Twolegs who abandoned such a loyal cat. (this was literally traumatizing. i was like EXCUSE ME????. hat ethis game/j)

Golddawn takes her new apprentice to gather herbs. Greenleaf is truly the best time of year to be a medicine cat, with the world so full of flowers and green growths. She heads out to gather fresh mallow for the stores with Squirrelpaw. However, Goldawn is distracted today and the patrol is unsuccessful. Squirrelpaw looks up at her with disappointment.

Stoatskip and Hazelbloom train together, swapping and practicing new hunting techniques.

Moon 5:

Hazelbloom twisted a paw on some rocks, and now has fleas. Moonthistle has a stomachache but hes being so brave about it

Gracklegrost begins to bound with the apprentice cats, having a delightful discussion about clan events with Squirrelpaw and sharing the latest gossip with Stoatpaw.

Squirrelpaw feels like Gracklegorse hasn't been completely honest lately. (maybe bc hes still recovering. from da trauma. of losing Fawnroot. ever thoughta that)

Mudfur and Sunstar feel like they understand enough other more after a difficult conversation. Meanwhile, Stoatskip feels like Mudfur has been ignoring him.

Moonthistle trades prey with Squirrelpaw, and the two of them sunbathe together with Havenkit.

SOMEONE told Sunstar a FALSEHOOD about Havenkit. he's two moons old. who makes up rumors for a 2 month old

Buzzardkit scolds his brother about something, but seems to stutter throughout the whole ordeal, doesn't stop it from upsetting Havenkit, however.

Thoughts/In-Camp actions:

Stoatskip worries about Havenkit, while Squirrelpaw would like to get to know the kit better.

Sunstar thinks about what to say at the next clan gathering.

Kokichi bounds with Buzzardkit by pretending to be a big, evil warrior for him to battle.

Buzzardkit thinks Squirrelpaw will make a great medicine cat🥺😭

From StarClan, Fawnroot is judging Stoatpaw

Patrols:

Golddawn heads out to look for dandelions, bringing Squirrelpaw and Moonthistle with her. They however seem to be more intent on hunting, and Golddawn gives up, storming back to camp with their temper flaring.

Sunstar and Stoatpaw come across a bird that's occupied scratching at the ground for insects. they however narrowly miss the bird.

While walking along the border, Gracklegorse and Stoatskip notice an Oatclan patrol renewing their scent marks up ahead. The patrols eventually cross paths and an awkward tension fills the air. No one is quite sure what to say to break the silence and eventually everyone involved slowly shuffles away to continue their respective patrols.

Moon 6:

Stoatpaw accidentally trespasses onto OatClan's territory.

Kokichi recovers from birthing his litter, and Hazelbloom no longer has fleas. Moonthistle has also recovered from his stomachache!

Gracklegrose said something that rubbed Buzzardkit the wrong way, but Hazelbloom told him she'd take him outside of camp if he behaves.

Stoatpaw witnessed Squirrelpaw being rude, but Squirrelpaw realized afterwards that Havenkit's life isnt as easy as she thought.

Golddawn fell while climbing a tree, but luckily only suffered some bruising from it.

Thoughts/In-Camp actions:

Buzzardkit isn't ready to grow up yet, while Havenkit is bouncing around in excitment.

Gracklegrose agrees with Buzzardkit, thinking Squirrelpaw will make a good medicine cat.🥺

Despite his sprain, Hazelbloom tries to set a good example for younger cats

From StarClan, Fawnroot chatters at birds.

Squirrelpaw is looking forward to the day, while Goldawn bounces excitedly at the half-moon meeting.

Patrols:

Golddawn forages for herbs alone. While searching for some specific herbs, she is startled by weird sounds and whispering in the wind. She follows the strange sounds on the wind and finds the body of an unknown queen with their kits beside them, slowly going cold. Golddawn cancels the patrol and returns to camp to get help sending these lost souls to starclan.

Sunstar and Stoatpaw take Kokichi out to patrol. Kokichi and Stoatpaw have a disagreement about clan life and look to Sunstar to dispute. She stutters, she doesn't think shes fit to lead this patrol.

Stoatskip and Moonthistle patrol the borders, and catch the scent of a large dog wandering along the edge of the Clan's territory. They try to lead the dog away from the borders, but with so few cats it's impossible for them to cover each other's backs. Moonthistle falls to the dog as Stoatskip runs for his life back to camp, terrified out of his pelt.

and tahts all for now folks. 2 cats gone and 2 unknown cats dead as well im in fucking SHAMBLES

[greypentachoron]

The thing about having sheltered over 300 cats and living with 13 of them is that CLEARLY some cats are neurodivergent but like... Not in a human way.

Cats overall have behaviors that can be similar to human autism, but that's common for their species. We have to pick the overall cat behavior and consider outliers to think about neurodivergent cats.

And I'm not talking about depression, anxiety or PTSD related to trauma, those are basically obvious when you foster a cat with a difficult past, I'm talking behaviors that even in a healthy environment they just Are That Way. I'm gonna add a break down here if you wanna hear more about my experiences, and I welcome anyone who have cats (or any other pet, really) with neurodivergent behaviors to share their experiences too because this is fascinating for me.

I'm gonna start with my first case of "huh. This cat is... Not what I expect." I sadly don't have pictures of him anymore, but I promise the next ones will have pictures as payment for a long post.

Paçoca was found inside a dumpster barrel as young as 2 weeks old. Back then I was fostering a momma cat who had just given birth, and when I introduced him to her she decided "yep, long lost baby. Come on in"

Other than having enough fleas to drain him in a day he was healthy and full of energy. I dewormed him, gave him flea meds and he was fed and taken care of, but he didn't... Know how to socialise with other cats. His adoptive siblings were around his age, they tried playing, but the little dude was just confused by the whole thing and usually ran to hide from them. He meowed loudly towards every cat, those throaty meows cats usually do during heat even before his sexual maturity (and he was spayed very early on).

We checked his ears and eyes and he was fully healthy. He showed happiness by wagging his tail like a dog, and loved to play tag like one even though he never interacted with a dog ever. When he tried to interact with other cats when he felt secure enough, most of them interpreted his mannerisms like a threat because of the throaty meows, the intense stare, wagging tail and running after them. He was never trying to attack, mind you, when he got near his newest cat fascination he tried licking, headbutting, grooming... I am not sure how his life was before he was 2 weeks old, but he had most of his major kitten sociability milestones around a healthy mom and siblings. He was just a weird lil dude I guess.

This little lady is Pompom. She came after Paçoca, but I haven't figured out cat behaviors back then and she was the most striking. She's very aggressively set in routines, cats usually are but it physically pains her to leave her routines. When I lived in my older house she would go to the kitchen window to greet my neighbour everytime he came from work. She hisses and growls at the doorbell because she knows it's something different. When I changed her eating behaviors after she got healthy she would not eat and I had to keep doing the same exact steps for a long while and reducing the "tradition" bit by bit until she was comfortable.

Let me elaborate on that. When she had liver issues I gave all the cats their food while she waited patiently even though she hated the fancy food she was eating, I filled her bowl on the kitchen counter, called her name, we walked towards my bedroom, I closed the door and let the good down. Everyday, three times a day. It took me six months to ease her into the new routine, took me over a year to ease her OUT of the routine. She would not eat if the steps were wrong, she starved herself. Sometimes she was making progress and then remembered her routine and "nope, I don't think I will eat with the door open today"

Starting a new job and moving houses was (and still is, as far as I'm seeing) a terrible experience to her. She became EXTREMELY dependent and desperate for attention. She sleeps on my arms like a baby after these changes, won't eat if me or my mom are not around and she hisses and hates other cats in her personal space. She became extremely antisocial with other cats after my life changed and, sadly, even with a vet accompanying her about her behaviors, nothing changed. She's now a very lonely cat when she was very social, but I'm letting my other cats around her more often bit by bit to open her up to her cat social life again.

I'd like to just add "that's Pirate, he's a baby, next" but you wouldn't understand how much neurodivergent this cat is.

Pirate Does Not Understand he's not a kitten. He has the manners of a kitten and he's been living with me for two years already. He was at least 5 months old when I rescued him and he lived with a small gang of strays. Zero self protection, no social cues, nothing.

This cat was rescued because he and his gang were stealing food from the kitchens of TWO local restaurants, people were throwing beer (drink AND bottles) on them, and I heard the neighbours talk about poisoning food to leave for them. The gang was easier, I just had to move them from the streets to our colony where they get cat food three times a day, but Pirate has this funny defense mechanism... When he feels threatened he SCREAMS. Also he kept trying to eat trash bags, but the screams are a menace.

Rain? He stands there, in the rain, and yells. Car noise? Stands and yells. Cat approaching? Yell. He doesn't move, and more than once I had to run during the rainy season to search for this silly little cat who was arms deep on a puddle yelling because woe is me. I was drenched like I just went swimming wearing clothes. He's a disaster.

And, as I said, he's a Baby. He sees other cats and he wants to play like a kitten, he wants to be groomed. He doesn't partake in the give-and-take of adult cat behavior because he Is A Baby. He meows on every cat's face begging for grooming like a tiny little kitten. He tries cuddling with other cats and knows no boundaries of personal space with other cats. He just wants to cuddle, nuzzle, pile on top, if you've seen a kitten with an adult cat, that's him.

And the last one is Rosemary. First of all he's afraid of wet food. Deadly afraid, sees wet food and runs away so quickly he slides on the floor. I've never. Ever. Saw anything similar. I know cats that don't care about it, but he FLEES. He and his mom are with me since his birth. No trauma on this little head. I tried many brands, tried many recipes of homemade wet food, and he is TERRIFIED of it. If there's no dry food he won't eat. He also does chirping noises instead of meowing to cats, and I know he can meow because he meows to me. The chirping seems to be an uncomfortable warning, a "leave me alone", and he is very nonconfrontational with other cats unless there's bullying. He WILL attack the bully to defend the other cat.

Any other social cues related to cat behaviors? None. Nada. He grooms himself and me when I pet him, but he is scared of others grooming him, and is afraid of his own cat mom. My cats are not aggressive or territorial with each other, so I'm not sure where this fear comes from. He also wags his tail to show happiness even though he never met Paçoca, full wag and not point of the tail flickering, so I'm not sure what to make out of it. I don't have much to say about him, but honestly he's a weird and finicky little dude. It's almost as if he's a little alien who tried to get cat behavior right but everything is kind of off.

Everything the other cats do is confusing, cat weed is terrifying, he doesn't like drinking water from bowls but he is confused how sinks and fountains work, plants are weird--- I see him struggle with normal concepts for cats and I'm not sure why, but my cat son needs more time to process than other cats. I've interacted with enough of them to realise he's a little different, but that's fine!

And that's all I remember for now. Again, if you like please reblog with your own "my pet is probably neurodivergent" stories. I'd love to hear all about it <3

And that's feeding time missing only 3 of them, Lynx eats by the living room table, Pompom eats in the bedroom and Maia is starting to accompany her to see if I can socialise Pompom back after the move!

[mackthecheese]

Still for the first ask game

2, 5, 20

For art class crush person >:D

You’re devious >:0

I’m going to call him CatRat as a code name because he has a pet cat and pet rats.

(2) When I Truly Started to Like Them:

I’ve always liked him, really. I always thought he was really cool pre-transition when he hardly ever talked. He just got cooler when we met again in high school post-coming-out. He was with his (now ex) boyfriend (whom I don’t like AT ALL (he threatened to beat me up in the theatre parking lot after I completely un-flirtily complimented CatRat)) at the time, so being romantically involved with him didn’t even cross my mind. They broke up and he took it really hard (ex bf was smoochin’ the whole dang theatre and CatRat knew this but was convinced it wasn’t anything serious because “that’s just how the theatre is,” which I can say is only the case about 50% of the time), so I was a shoulder of support for him.

The moment it really clicked that “oh shit I wanna marry this guy” was one random day in English class. He was showing me a video of one of his pet rats named Hourglass cleaning her curly whiskers and something in my brain just switched and said “this is the cutest, sweetest guy in the planet,” and I’ve been head over heels ever since.

He knows I like him because of a long and complicated analogy about bricks and he acknowledges my feelings, but is not open to a relationship at the moment. He was with his ex for a long time and isn’t ready to try again just yet. I totally respect his decision and am more than willing to be patient. If he decides he doesn’t want to try dating again with me, that’s cool too. I just want him to be as happy as he can be and if that means we stay just friends, that’s fine with me. 💜💜💜

(5) My Favorite Ship of Them:

CatRat x self care. He struggles sometimes with putting himself first and making sure he’s hydrated, so I check in about once a day to make sure he’s taking time for himself and drinking water. :)

(20) A Weird Headcanon:

I have no evidence of this, but I am absolutely convinced that he has put his rats on his head like little rat hats before. No way has he never put a rat on his head. He absolutely has. Same with the kittens he fosters sometimes. He’ll be very careful and have his hands ready to catch them if they slip at all. He will put that rat on his head and let it crawl around. Rat. On his head. Yeah. It’s also probably the cutest thing ever. Once again, I have absolutely nothing to tell me that this is true. I just know it is, instinctually.

[muite]

Chifuyu is a complete idiot

» fluff + song inspo: I love this song so much I wrote this in 15 minutes ૮₍ ˃̵͈᷄ . ˂̵͈᷅ ₎ა also please look at this I'm simping so hard (0.8k)

In heaven, that's how you felt right now

"it's so sweet of you to take me on a date like this Fuyu"

"I know right? I thought I'd be super romantic to ride a bike with you" he laughed "I mean we always ride my bike but like a bicycle you know"

"I understood the first time, do you think I'm an idiot?"

"I'm sorry!"

you laughed pressing your back to his looking at the scenery

you and hina were just exiting school when he and takemichi appeared, they both left together leaving you and chifuyu to go back home together

though he had other plans in mind, asking you if you wanted to go on a "unexpected but super exciting and romantic" date with him

hence why he was riding a bike with you on the back of it, you didn't question why you were riding to a river and just focused on the pretty sunset that was making you feel this moment impossibly romantic

"we're finally here!"

"eh?" finally snapping out of your haze you looked around the place "but we're under the bridge Fuyu..?"

"yeah come look at this!"

walking up to him you noticed him taking out a little box and a bottle of water out of his backpack while crouching down at a little box

"hello babies! did you miss me?"

five little kittens started meowing as Chifuyu poured them what you now recognized as kitten food from the little box and some water

"ne Fuyu"

"yeah?"

"... is this our 'unexpected but super exciting and romantic' date?"

he answered your question with a bright smile and a exciting "yeah!"

you wanted to punch him

"I'm going home"

"wait wait!" running up to you he hugged your arms to stop you from leaving "I actually wanted to ask you something... for a long time, I just wanted to be brave enough for this moment.."

feeling your heart racing you looked into his eyes, thinking he was just about to prank you but surprised to see him dead serious

is he... ¿¡is he finally asking me to be his girlfriend!?

you always looked at the relationship Hina and Takemichi had with longing eyes, wanting to have a relationship as cute as them would be anyones dream

sadly you were stuck with a complete idiot who just liked to mess around

you knew Chifuyu was a good boy and of course you knew he liked you back and that was exactly why it was so frustrating that he never asked to be something more than whatever the two of you are

you could easily ask him, but seeing him not making any move made you feel uneasy too, so you foolishly continued this child's play with the excuse of let the time do its work

and finally the day has come, Chifuyu was finally ready to ask you to be his girlfriend and you were more than ready to say yes

"wh-what is it that you want to ask me?"

please kamisama, let this idiot ask me out!

seeing him take a deep breath made your cheeks heat up in flames

I'm gonna pass out!

"I know you have a big house and that your parents are super cool so can you please foster the kittens while I find their forever home?"

time stopped just like your heart did, the heat leaving your cheeks and with your eyes leaving their lovesick sparkle you murmured

"I'm definitely going home"

"please y/n! you know I live in a small apartment! please please please do it for meeee"

looking into his puppy eyes and noticing how close he was to your face made you blush sadly you couldn't help but give in to him

It's a total pity I'm in love with this idiot!

"fine but you have to provide them their food, I'm not paying for anything"

"you're truly the best!" Chifuyu exclaimed hugging you

He continued jumping around with you, but your brain was too fried to think about anything other than the heat his body irradiated and just as you started to wrap your arms around him he put distance between you and him

"you have nothing to worry about ok? just make sure they're five when you wake up and that they're still five when you go to sleep"

the sparkle in his eyes made you feel all warm inside, yeah, he didn't ask you to be his girlfriend but you sure did make him feel happy and that was more than enough for your little hopeless heart to stop aching

still feeling ridiculous you laughed and smiled at him

"yeah yeah whatever you say, bring the box over, I can carry it on my lap while you take me home"

"got it!"

and just as you turned around Chifuyu spun you to face him once again and with bright innocent eyes said

"oh yeah I almost forgot, do you wanna be my girlfriend?"

[poisonedapples]

Patton’s Home for Traumatized Kids

Chapter One: The New Kid

Story Summary: Roman has to have a completely new start. New school, new town, new home and a new family. As a kid in his first foster home, Roman isn’t prepared to trust these people and get hurt again, but he’s not the only kid in the house recovering from past issues. Regardless, their foster father Patton is ready to be the dad they’ve always needed, and traumatized kids learn to lean on each other for support.

Story Warnings: Past abuse of all types, trauma, and anxiety

Pairings: Familial LAMP

Chapter Summary: Roman moves into his new foster home. He is not having a good time.

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, panic, implied past abuse, food, one vomiting mention, and talk of hidden cameras

Word Count: 6778

Notes: First chapter of a story I’ve wanted to make for my foster au! Thanks to Cornybird on Ao3 for beta-ing this one <3

“Logan, Virgil?” Patton called out from downstairs. “Can you come down here? I wanna talk about something with you!”

Virgil and Logan gave each other curious looks from their sitting places on the same bed. Virgil placed his phone on the nightstand beside him as Logan set his book down at the foot of the bed, both standing up to exit Virgil’s bedroom and head downstairs. At the dining room table was their foster father, Patton, smiling wide with a laptop and notepad in front of him.

“What’s up?” Virgil asked after he and Logan glanced at each other. 

Patton giggled to himself, “Sit down for a second and I’ll tell you! Nothing bad, promise. I think it’s very exciting.”

They quickly sat at the table on the other side of Patton. “So,” Patton joked, “I bet you’re wondering why I’ve gathered you all here today!”

Logan and Virgil spoke in unison. “You’re getting another foster kid.”

Patton blinked. “…How’d you guess it?”

“You’ve been really happy recently, but also very quiet about why you were so happy. You only get like this when you’re bringing another foster kid into the mix. You did the same thing when Logan came along.” Virgil said.

Logan nodded. “Virgil told me about his suspicions due to your behavior, and I agreed with him. I think we both expected you’d make the announcement soon.”

“Oh.” Patton rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “I didn’t think it was that easy to tell. Well, you guessed right! The new kiddo is moving in on Sunday!”

Logan leaned closer. “What’s their name?”

“His name is Roman Goldsberry. He’s fifteen, and he’s only been in the system for about five months. Though, before this, he was in kinship care with his aunt, so living here is going to be very strange for him. So just be patient with him at first, okay?”

“Yeah yeah, we will be.” Virgil smirked. “But you said he was fifteen?”

“Yup! He’ll be a sophomore in high school this year.”

“Aw, that means Logan’s still the baby in the family.”

Logan blushed. “I’m a teenager. I am not the so-called ‘baby’ of the family.”

“Sounds like something the baby of the family would say.”

“Falsehood!”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough.” Patton tried not to laugh. He knew how much Logan hated being the youngest, but it was hard to act like his reaction wasn’t funny. “Remember, Roman will be here Sunday, so be on your best behavior when he gets here. No spooking him.”

“Got it, got it.” Virgil slouched in his chair and thought. “One more question though. How fucked up is he?”

“Virgil, language.” Patton warned.

“Sorry! It’s just a question. We know you have a soft spot for the most effed up kids you can find.”

“I would have to say I’m curious as well.” Logan agreed. “It’s become a pattern.”

Patton sighed. “He’s not messed up, he’s a kid who’s struggling and needs support. If he wants to tell you two about his past, then he will.”

Virgil groaned. “Fine, fine. Can we go back upstairs now?”

Patton smiled. “Yes, you can go.”

“Great! I’m stealing your book, Logan.”

“Wait, you can’t do that!”

Virgil darted back upstairs with a maniacal laugh as Logan chased him, the sound of bickering teenagers traveling back up the stairs. Patton shook his head in amusement, still listening to the ruckus in case it got out of hand and he needed to step in, but Patton knew his kids. They may tease, but they’re not mean.

Patton continued working on his laptop once the noise quieted down again.

***

“I hate this.”

“I know you do, Roman, but I’m certain you can persevere and find happiness in this new home!” Roman’s social worker, Mr. Picani, smiled hopefully as he continued to drive him to his foster home. Roman was scooted as close to the window as he could possibly get, his legs crossed and clamped together so tight his thighs were getting sore. He didn’t trust Picani, and he sure as hell didn’t trust this new house. No matter what anyone told him.

“I already had a home! Living with my aunt was so much better than whatever could happen here.” Roman’s hands shook just thinking about it. He didn’t know anything about this new person, and the idea of being in a house full of strangers was enabling the more gruesome side of his imagination. He trusted his aunt, at least, but now he was going to a family who could be anyone.

Roman didn’t like the idea of that.

Picani frowned. “You know why your aunt couldn’t house you anymore, Roman. I know it’s not easy, but I think you’ll like this new place! It’s more up north in Foley County, and the area is nice. He also has two other foster children if that helps.”

“How old are the other kids?”

“Fourteen and sixteen, I think. You’ll get to know them more during your time there.”

Roman hummed, looking out the window and digging his nails into his shirt sleeve. He really hoped this foster dad hadn’t touched them before. Even forgetting about himself, a fourteen year old kid having to deal with abuse? Even after getting away from bad parents? He didn’t wish that on anyone.

“And if you ever feel unsafe,” Picani added, “you can always contact me, ‘kay?”

I already feel unsafe. “Okay. How much longer until we’re there?”

“About twenty more minutes. Just enough time to finish the rest of the Tangled movie soundtrack!”

Roman didn’t respond. Normally, he’d love to have a Disney soundtrack he could burst into song with, but he wasn’t feeling it today. And probably wouldn’t be feeling it for a long time.

He just wanted to feel safe. He felt safe with his aunt, but she couldn’t afford to keep him long after the trial since she gave birth to the twins. His aunt was always one of his favorite relatives, one of the few adults he genuinely trusted, now he was going to the house of some random guy named Patton, who he’d only heard of yesterday, and expected to be okay near him. Well, he wasn’t okay. And he wasn’t going to be, ever.

Roman leaned his head on the window and closed his eyes. His hands still shook a little and his chest felt weird, but fighting it now was pointless. Roman just hoped that if this guardian did try something, he’d do it quickly. The sooner Roman told on him to save himself and the other kids, the better.

Though, Roman still felt his hands tingle at the thought. The idea of “getting it over with” made him want to scream and cry. He wrapped his legs tighter together.

After a long time of trying to fight against his own anxious thoughts, Picani pulled into a driveway and stopped the car and Roman opened his eyes to take a look at where they were. He didn’t know the neighborhood, but it seemed like Picani was telling the truth when he said the neighborhood was nice. The house seemed huge, big bushes and flower patches in the front yard and a nice outside paint job. It looked like a house that a functional nuclear family would have, where the dad is a doctor and the mom stays at home with the kids.

Well, looks can be deceiving. Roman thought. Don’t get your hopes up.

“Here we are!” Picani unbuckled his seatbelt with a wide smile. “Grab your suitcases in the back, I’ll knock on the door.”

Roman nodded and got out of the car as Picani popped the trunk. He grabbed two red suitcases and a backpack, closing the car and wheeling it all up to the front door. Picani was there talking to a guy who Roman assumed must be Patton Sanders, and by taking just one look at him…Roman had never seen a person look so much like a dad.

 He was wearing khaki shorts and a light blue polo with tennis shoes and knee socks, thick-rimmed glasses sitting on his face to finish off the dorky look. Patton managed to pull it off, sure, but Roman felt a primal urge from binge-watching Queer Eye to fix that mess of an outfit. 

Before Roman could truly take in the fact that Patton’s knee socks also had kittens on them, Patton smiled wide once he saw Roman in the corner of his eye. “Hello, Roman! It’s so nice to have you, come on in you two!”

Patton stepped aside to hold out the door as Picani and Roman both walked in. Roman scraped his arm on the door frame trying to keep a reasonable distance from Patton, but neither of the adults seemed to notice how Roman was acting. Patton kept smiling away, and Roman tried to see how real that smile truly was. “So, Mr. Picani, I know I have some things to go over with you, so how would you feel if the other kiddos showed you around the house, Roman?”

…Kiddos? “That sounds fine to me.”

“Perfect!” Patton walked over to the staircase and called upstairs. “Logan, Virgil! Can you come down here please?”

Patton’s request was quickly followed by the sound of doors opening and closing. Two kids walked down the stairs; a boy in a black and purple hoodie, and another boy with thick glasses almost the same as Patton’s. They both stared at Roman curiously, and Roman wanted to sink into the floor.

Patton placed an arm over Logan and Virgil’s shoulders and Roman winced at the sight. “So, kiddos, this is Roman! And Roman, this is Logan,” Patton pointed to the kid in glasses. “And Virgil!” He pointed to the kid with the hoodie. The boys didn’t react much besides an awkward half smile directed Roman’s way. “How about you both show him around while I talk to Mr. Picani?”

Virgil shrugged. “Come upstairs, dude.”

Patton let go of both of the boys and walked off into the kitchen with Picani. Roman watched them from the living room for a moment, but he could feel two pairs of eyes staring at him from behind, so he turned around and followed the kids upstairs, bringing his luggage with him.

At the top of the stairs, a long hallway connected six doors on the second floor. Four of the doors were plain, brown doors, but two of them had very distinct personalities shown on the outside. One was covered in stars and planets, the door covered in a starry piece of wallpaper with a metal planet popping out of the background. The other was covered in caution tape saying keep out, with emo band posters poking out from under the tape. Two very different personalities.

“Your room will be this one at the very end of the hallway.” Logan opened the door to the room, turning on the light as Roman peeked inside. “You can place your luggage in here in the meantime.”

Roman nodded and walked inside to throw his luggage onto the floor. The room was very bare, with brown sheets on a twin bed and not much other furniture besides a desk and a dresser. There was a lamp on the desk and a floor lamp next to a door, and one of the opened closet doors showed that the top was covered in random boxes. Some newer-looking stuffed animals were also sitting on the bed; a soft bear and one of those squishy stuffed chickens Roman always saw in stores. It looked like an attempt at a welcoming gift, but new stuffed animals always put Roman on edge. He looked around the room, and the idea of sleeping here made Roman’s heart start to pound. He needed to check this place before he went to sleep that night.

Virgil smirked, taking Roman away from his anxious thoughts. “Damn, you’ve got suitcases? Living the fancy life I see.”

“…What?” Roman reeled.

Logan adjusted his glasses and crossed his arms. “Most foster children move their things using garbage bags. It’s rare we use actual suitcases.”

Roman looked down at his luggage. Suddenly, he felt guilty. “Oh, well…my aunt gave them to me before I moved out, so…”

Virgil shrugged. “What do you wanna see up here first?”

“We could show him our rooms. Or possibly the attic?”

“The attic is cooler.”

“What’s in the attic?” Roman asked.

“It essentially acts as a playroom.” Logan explained. “Board games and a…random assortment of items are all piled up there. It’s quite entertaining to search through, actually.”

“And it’s in the best place ever, come here.” Virgil motioned for Roman and Logan to follow him. He stopped at one of the doors, opening it and letting Roman peek over his shoulder to look inside. It looked like a normal walk-in closet, first aid and toilet paper on one side with batteries and rows of shampoo on the other. Virgil walked in with a smirk, “Now, check this shit out.”

Virgil jumped and pulled on a string dangling from the roof, unraveling a steep staircase through the closet leading up to a hole in the roof. Virgil started to climb the stairs as Logan followed suit, so Roman climbed right after them.

When Roman made it to the top, his eyes widened with wonder. Granted, it wasn’t anything too spectacular, surely not like something in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, but the fact that this hidden space existed made Roman feel excited. At his old house, he barely even had his own room to himself, so a place like this was paradise.

The walls were painted white with a giant window above a sitting area on the other side of the room. Shelves of items scattered the walls, and the rug on the floor was so clean Roman wondered how they even got a vacuum up here. It wasn’t anything like his old attic, stuffed with random items from over the years and covered in spiderwebs. Roman felt like he could spend most of his day here.

“We have a lot of various toys up here.” Logan said. He gestured to the boxes on one of the shelves. “Pokémon cards, a chess set, Magic the Gathering, lots of Lego sets, craft supplies, most of our toys make their way up here.”

Roman’s head perked up. “…Craft supplies?”

Logan nodded. “I believe we have paints and drawing utensils.”

Roman looked at the bottom of the shelf Logan gestured toward. There was a box of small painting canvases with paints and brushes, and though they definitely looked cheap, Roman saw them and grew excited as he took out a canvas and the paints in wonder.

“Kiddos!” A voice yelled from the staircase. Logan and Roman walked over to the stairs to look down, but Virgil stayed in his place on a beanbag near the window. Patton and Picani stood at the bottom, and Patton smiled. “Now, what are you all doing up there?”

“We’re showing him around the house.” Logan said matter-of-factly.

“You are, huh?” Patton crossed his arms. “Does he know where the bathroom is?”

Logan blinked. Virgil called out from behind both of them. “He knows where the important things are!”

Patton tried not to smile, but he lost that battle quickly. “Well, Mr. Picani is leaving right now, Roman.”

“How ‘bout you come down here and I talk to you in private for a sec?” Picani asked.

“Uh, alright!” Roman climbed down the stairs and followed Picani out of the closet, while Patton climbed up the stairs into the attic. They both stepped away to the other side of the hallway, and suddenly Picani’s face became very serious.

“Do you feel safe in this house, Roman?” He asked.

Roman clenched his fist and bit his cheek. No, he didn’t, actually. He didn’t know what Patton would do once the coast was clear from guests, and the idea of what could happen was freezing him from the inside out. The only place Roman would feel truly safe was if he was back in the hospital.

But Roman knew that wasn’t possible, and he couldn’t keep bothering Picani all the time for fears that couldn't be helped. He had to be on his own. Alone.

“I think I do. They…seem like good people.” Roman lied. He’d have to find another way to survive.

Picani smiled, not noticing Roman’s unease. He always was a great actor. “Amazing! Let me know if anything comes up, bucko, and I’ll talk to ya again soon! But until then…so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen goodnight!”

Picani walked downstairs and waved behind him, laughing at his own reference as he walked out the door. Roman watched him from the staircase until he could see the car leaving the driveway through the window, and Roman felt truly hopeless. This was a nightmare.

He stood frozen on the staircase for a while, staring through the window with a hope of Picani turning back and saving him. But no car came into the driveway, and Roman didn’t know what to do with himself anymore. What do you even do when living in a house full of strangers?

“Heya, kiddo!” Roman jumped at the voice coming from behind him, jerking his head back and pushing his back up against the wall. It was Patton, smiling wide with a concerned look in his eyes at Roman’s reaction. “I’m sorry, Roman, I didn’t mean to scare you! I just wanted to ask if you wanted me to give you the rest of the tour. I’ll show you everything you need this time!”

Patton laughed at himself, but Roman felt the need to vomit. Patton was close, way too close, and he didn’t know what to do about it. He didn’t want to be roaming around the house with him, vulnerable and nowhere to hide. He needed to be somewhere safe.

“Uh, no, I’m fine! I’ll figure it out myself!” Patton raised an eyebrow at him, but Roman didn’t care. “Where’s the bathroom?”

Patton’s voice became softer. He pointed to the left of him, down the opposite direction of Roman’s room. “It’s over there. Are you sure you’re alright? You look a little pale.”

“I’m fine!” Roman darted past Patton quickly and out of reach, rushing into the bathroom and locking it behind him. He pressed his back against the door and sat down, pressing his feet against the sink, ready to fight against the door if someone tried to open it. He wrapped his arms around himself tightly, trying to even out his scattered breathing. He knew Patton was outside of the door, he could feel it. He just needed to be somewhere safe.

Roman didn’t move from his spot on the floor, eventually curling into himself and resting his head on his knees. He was so tired, the whole day his heart had been pounding with anxiety and he was sick of it. What did it take to feel safe? Was it even possible for Roman to feel safe anymore?

He didn’t want an answer to that. He was just so tired.

 Roman closed his eyes and leaned his body against the bathroom wall, ignoring all his aches from the strange position and trying to give himself some comfort. His body was exhausted but his mind kept racing, thinking of all the things that could go wrong while living here. He tried to fight the anxious thoughts, but Roman figured it wasn’t that big of a deal. If he threw up in the toilet maybe they’d leave him alone for the day.

But Roman never got to that point. He rested on the floor and let his body shake, taking some deep breaths at times to feel less like he was suffocating. Eventually, a knock came to the bathroom door, and it took everything in Roman not to yelp.

“Are you still in there, Roman?” Roman could tell the voice was Logan, and that helped him relax a little more. He took in a big breath and tried to act normal.

“Yes, sorry. Do you need it?” He asked.

“I’m alright. I simply wanted to ask if you wanted to come downstairs and use the paints you seemed so interested in.”

Roman’s ears perked up at that. He forgot all about the paints, and it would be something that could ease his mind a little. But Roman wasn’t that dumb. He knew this was a plan to get him out of the bathroom. Though…he might not mind that much if he wasn’t alone.

“…Would you sit with me?” Roman asked. He doubted Patton would try anything so long as they weren’t alone together, and if he pleased them enough, maybe they’d leave him alone.

Logan was slow to respond. “I suppose I can if you wish for me to.”

Roman rolled his eyes at that sentence. What a nerd, he thought, standing up and slowly unlocking the door to the bathroom before opening it. He looked through the crack to check if Patton was standing behind Logan, but no one else was there. Logan stood there patiently with his hands clasped behind his back, and Roman fully exited the bathroom.

“I set the box on the dining room table. However, Patton is also there making a pizza for dinner.”

Roman froze. The same room as Patton? “… I’ll go, but you have to stay near me.”

Logan nodded. He led the way down the stairs while Roman followed, entering the dining room through the connected area in the living room. On the table was the box of painting supplies, and Roman ran toward them to start taking them out, trying to ignore the fact that he could see Patton in the corner of his eye. He grabbed a canvas and the cheap paints, as well as a plastic pallet and all the brushes. All that he needed was a cup of water, but…the sink was right next to where Patton was.

Roman drummed his fingers on the table. “…Logan, can you get me a cup of water?”

“Alright.” Logan stood up and grabbed a cup from the cupboard, filling it with water and handing it to Roman. Roman murmured a thank you, and Logan sat back down at his seat. He was grateful that Logan didn’t ask why Roman couldn’t get it himself.

“So, Roman,” Roman stiffened at the sound of Patton’s voice. “Are you an artsy kid?”

Roman gripped hard onto his paints, squirting out a lot more orange than he meant to. “I guess, yeah. I like art.”

“Do you like to paint, or are you more of a sketchy kinda guy?”

“Uh…all of it. Painting, drawing, coloring, I used to make a lot of stuffed animals too.”

“Awww, that sounds adorable!” The oven beeped and Patton put on his oven gloves and pulled out the pizza. “It’s probably best I don’t know how to make stuffed animals though. If I did, this house would be full of little stuffed puppies!”

Roman didn’t respond. He focused completely on mixing red and orange for a perfect sunset color, attempting to get a good gradient with the lack of shade variety. Once he filled in his sunset and blended it with a dark night sky, he mixed his white with a dot of gray and made darker clouds, dotting them above his rough-looking hill. He wanted to add more texture to the bottom of the canvas, maybe some trees, but he didn’t know how to make good ones without a fan brush. Maybe he could add some grass…

“Alright, the pizza is cooled down and ready!” Roman noticed Patton put a plate next to his painting, so he pushed all his supplies out of the way so he could eat. Patton set down more plates around the table as Virgil walked in. “It was a real pizza work if I do say so myself!”

Logan rolled his eyes and Virgil held back a snort, but Roman didn’t quite know how to react. He might have found the dad joke more amusing if he wasn’t so on edge.

Roman took a bite of the pizza. It wasn’t anything spectacular, just a store-bought one that you heat up in the oven and serve, but Roman didn’t realize he was so hungry until now. He had skipped lunch because his nerves about coming here were making his stomach churn, but finally having food near him was bringing back that hunger. Roman’s foot was still tapping violently under the table, but it was progress.

Everyone ate their pizza in silence. It was incredibly awkward on Roman’s end, no stories to tell as this table full of strangers kept making glances at him. Patton was the worst with it. He seemed to want to say something to Roman, continuously making eye contact with him until Roman looked away, but still not saying a word. He couldn’t take it. He hated it, but he hated this silence even more. Roman swallowed the pizza bite he was chewing and opened his mouth.

“So,” Roman started, “what do I…call you anyway?”

“Me?” Patton asked, his eyes lighting up. Why would his eyes light up at that?

“Yeah. Do I say Mr. Sanders, or…?”

“Oh, Patton works just fine! I hear Mr. Sanders way too often at work to wanna hear it at home too!”

“Oh, where- where do you work?” At least it wasn’t so quiet anymore.

“I’m a nurse practitioner for a clinic. It’s a lot of fun, just a lot of work. At least my hours aren’t as crazy as most nurses.”

“Oh that’s…cool.” Roman didn’t know how to continue off of that.

“It is! Is there anything else you wanna ask me, though? Maybe about the house, routines, anything?”

“Well…what are the rules here?” That seemed like a very safe question to have. It could save Roman a lot of trouble, and it could give him more of a read on the kind of parent Patton was.

“Oh, it’s not that much. You’re old enough to clean up after yourself, so make it a habit to pick up your own things and not put that stuff on other people. Be kind to everyone else, and the only rule I’m very strict about is no yelling. You can be loud sometimes, but no angry yelling at anybody here. The last one is to respect others’ privacy. Always knock on someone’s bedroom door before entering. But that’s really it, I think!”

How often do you break that last rule? “That seems reasonable, I suppose.”

Patton smiled. “I think you’ll do just fine here, kiddo. I know it’s hard to start over, but you won’t be alone during it!”

“…Thank you.”

“And I’m sure Virgil and Logan could help out a little bit, since they’ve been in the same situation! Right, you two?”

Virgil was halfway through trying to stick a whole piece of crust in his mouth. “…Uh huh.”

“…Virgil, chew your food.”

“Lo’an ‘old me I cou’ do it!”

“Do not drag me into this.”

Virgil hid his mouth behind his hand as he chewed for a long period of time. “You’re just avoiding your responsibility.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Well, I’m finished, so try not to choke now.”

“Now I’m gonna choke just to spite you.”

“Please do not start a choking contest, Virge.”

Virgil groaned before swallowing the last of his crust. He followed Logan to the dishwasher and put his plate in, closing it and scurrying away back upstairs. Logan hesitated leaving the dining room, looking between Patton and Roman. Roman couldn’t tell if Patton noticed Logan’s hesitation or if it was just perfect timing, because he also got up and put his plate in the dishwasher.

“When you finish, Roman, just put your dishes away.”

“I can do that.”

Patton smiled and walked off into the living room, sitting on the couch to watch some TV show seemingly about cute puppies and kittens. Logan glanced at Roman again.

“Do you still want me to stay?” Logan asked.

Roman ate the last of his pizza and pushed his plate to the side, grabbing his painting again to put in front of him. It was the most effective thing at calming him down. “…No, I should be okay.”

Logan nodded and walked upstairs. Roman tried to fully immerse himself in his painting, focusing on every last detail and how he could make it better without over-detailing it. Roman put more green on his brush and started to dot at his hill on the bottom, trying to add little blades of textured grass. It was a long process, just enough to take the majority of his focus and calm his hands.

…Roman felt really weird here. It didn’t feel like he lived in this house, now. It felt like he was spending the day with some friends, and his aunt would come pick him up before the sun went down. But no, these new kids were his foster brothers and the adult he was terrified of was expected to act as his new dad. There was no one coming to save him, he was expected to sleep here and eat here and live here. This was supposed to be his safe space.

Roman rubbed at his eyes and shook his head. Don’t focus on that now, he thought. Focus on the painting.

So he did focus. He focused on monotonous texture additions and watching the paint dry on his canvas as he went along, letting the repetitive action calm his mind just a little bit. His calming method seemed to be working too well, actually, as the more details he added and stared at the paint, Roman realized that his constant panic today had completely exhausted him. It wasn’t even seven o’clock yet and Roman could feel his eyelids get heavier. He rubbed at his eyes again and tried to focus.

Roman yawned once. He yawned twice and rubbed his eyes as he kept adding minor details to his painting. Then, after a while, Roman scooted his painting to the side and laid his head down on the table.

***

“…Roman, wake up, please.”

Roman buried his head deeper in his arms. “Come on Roman, it’s late.”

Roman groggily lifted his head up. Patton was sitting in the chair across from him, the lights were all off except for the one light above the dining table. Roman looked around him, and noticed that it was dark outside now. Shit.

“You fell asleep, but that’s okay. It’s bedtime now, and the other two are already in bed, so how about you go get ready and sleep in your bed? I bet it’s comfier than the table.”

Roman dug his palm into his eye. “…What time is it…?”

“About 10:20. You all have bedtime at ten.”

“…But I’m fifteen?” Roman gave Patton a confused and sleepy look. He hasn’t had a bedtime since he was twelve, especially one that was so early. His mom only told him to be in bed by midnight.

Patton smiled. “I’ll let you in on a little secret. Logan is the only one who needs a bedtime, but I don’t want him to feel left out because he’s the only one asleep. So, how about you get ready for bed?”

Roman nodded and got out of his chair. The more he walked, the more he woke up, and he could tell by the time he went back upstairs that he wasn’t going to go back to sleep for a while since he could feel his heartbeat in his chest again. Patton followed him upstairs, turning off the dining room light as they went. Roman got his bathroom bag out from his smaller suitcase and a cotton shirt with sweatpants for pajamas, bringing it all with him to the bathroom. He closed the door as he brushed his teeth for the night, placing his bag in the bottom drawer after he did. He changed into his pajamas carefully, taking the towel on one of the racks to hide his lower half under as he switched pants, taking his other clothes and throwing them into a laundry basket.

When Roman stepped out of the bathroom, Patton was leaning against a wall waiting for him. He smiled at Roman, but Roman still ran past him to get as far away as he could get. Patton didn’t seem to notice, or maybe he just didn’t care. Roman shifted on his feet awkwardly before closing his door.

“Um…goodnight.” He finally said. Patton seemed satisfied with this.

“Goodnight, Roman.”

Roman finally closed the door to his bedroom, waiting until he heard the door on the other end of the hallway open and close. Almost immediately after, as if another force was controlling him, Roman started to tear the place apart.

He checked the charging ports in the walls, the lamp, under the bed’s covers and behind every piece of furniture. He stood on top of his suitcase to check the vents and took out all the drawers in the dresser. He punched the stuffed animals to see if he could feel wires, but he still couldn’t find it. He couldn’t find it.

Roman felt himself start to pant. He refused to go to bed until he found it. No matter how well hidden it was, Roman knew there was a camera in here. He couldn’t stop until he found it.

Roman grabbed the boxes at the top of the closet and tossed everything out of them, checking every spare blanket and binder before throwing them across the room when he found nothing. He took the hangers out of the closet and threw them on the floor, shining his phone light on the wall of the closet to find a hole. Nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing.

Tears sprung into Roman’s eyes as he choked on his own breath. “Where the hell is it!?” He whispered, slamming the closet door closed and moving to check the bed. He tore the bedsheets off and checked the mattress, lifting it up as well to check the bed frame for anything that could be used to record. Nothing.

“Come on, please-” Roman took out the drawer from the bedside table. Nothing. He unscrewed the lightbulb from the lamp, almost shattering it from his tight grip. Nothing. He threw the lamp onto the bed and kicked the nightstand over. Nothing.

Roman choked out a sob as his whole body started to shake. This wasn’t fair, he spent all that time trying to get away from his dad only to end up in a place that hid cameras better than him. Roman gripped the covers he’d thrown and punched the floor next to them, the ache being an almost pleasant distraction from his own head. But his mind continued to race and his crying didn’t let up. The only thing Roman could manage to get out of his mouth was “No, no!”

Then, between Roman’s sobbing, he heard a knock at the door.

Roman froze in place. A feeling of dread spread through his chest and made his fingers go numb. For a second, Roman forgot to breathe as he remembered he forgot to lock the door.

Roman’s body was stiff, but his mind was going a mile a minute in a desperate attempt to save himself. He could hide in the closet, but since he tore everything out of there, if someone opened the door they’d immediately find him. He could hide under the bed, but without the covers to reach the floor it was easy to see he was under there. Roman choked on his own breath when he realized there was nowhere to hide-

“Roman?” The knock came back to the door, gentler than the first time. It wasn’t Patton’s voice like Roman feared, it was Virgil. Raspy and tired-sounding, but without a doubt Virgil.

“Y-yeah?” Roman squeaked out.

“Uh, can I…can I come in?”

Roman’s death grip on the covers loosened up slightly. “Yes…”

Virgil slowly turned the doorknob and opened it, slipping in through the smallest crack and closing the door slowly so it wouldn’t click. Once he was inside, Virgil’s eyes widened as he took in the sight of the destroyed room. “…Holy shit dude.”

Roman tried to dodge the situation, “What do you want?”

“I was gonna come in here and make a joke, like, ‘quiet down it sounds like a tornado is going through here’, but now I think I predicted the fucking future.” Roman put his head down as Virgil looked around in shock. “What the fuck happened?”

Roman wiped away his tears with the palm of his hands, digging into his eyes so hard he saw stars for a moment. “…There’s a camera in here.”

Virgil backed up more towards the door. “Wait, there is?” He darted his eyes around the room looking for what Roman was talking about. Roman let out a shaky breath.

“I haven’t found it yet, but I know it’s in here somewhere!” More tears went down Roman’s face as he hugged himself. Virgil seemed to realize what Roman was babbling on about. “I know Patton put a camera in here for me and I’m freaking out because I can’t find it!”

Virgil looked around at the mess again. He sighed. “I’m not good at this shit…you’re certain it’s in here?”

“Yes!”

“Hey, hey, don’t yell.” Virgil warned. “Pat and Logan are still asleep and I don’t think you’d like all that extra attention right now.”

He was right. If Logan and Patton came in here, Roman didn’t know what he’d do about it. It was the last thing he wanted, so Roman obeyed. “I just…I don’t know what to do…I can’t sleep until I find it.”

Virgil seemed to be thinking. He tugged on the neck of his pajama shirt before speaking. “How about we both make a deal?”

Roman lifted his head up to look at Virgil. “…Deal?”

“We’ll trade rooms for the night. There wouldn’t be a camera in my room if he’s trying to watch you, right?”

Roman paused. “…What if he’s watching you too?”

“I’ve lived here for two years. You think I wouldn’t have noticed a camera in my room by now?”

Roman thought about it. He did have a point, it was hard to go that long without finding the camera. Or at least, have your guardian have it slip that they’ve been watching you. And anything was better than staying in this place.

“…We can trade. Thanks.”

Virgil shrugged. “You know where my room is. Just slip in and don’t wreck all my shit.”

Roman laughed a little bit at that one. Virgil grabbed the sheets and covers off the floor and began to remake the bed as Roman grabbed his backpack and started to slowly open the door. But before he left, Roman had to say one more thing for his own piece of mind. “…Don’t touch my suitcases. I-I’ll know if you do.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow at him. “…I won’t.”

Roman opened the door and softly closed it behind him, slipping into the room next door covered in caution tape. He turned on the light and set his backpack down on the floor, looking around him at all the things that showed Virgil’s personality. Emo band posters covered the walls that were painted a dark purple, with dark wood furniture and Hot Topic decorations all over the place. Just looking at this room told him how angsty this kid was.

Roman shook it off and unzipped his backpack. He could deal with angsty decorations for the night, so long as this place could be safe from creeps. He took out his secret weapon from his backpack, something he secretly bought behind his aunt’s back with his babysitting money, the one item that made him feel secure in a home. He pulled out the security bar, locked Virgil’s door, and placed it under the door handle. Even if someone undid the lock, they wouldn’t be able to sneak inside while he was sleeping.

Roman’s heart calmed down a little for the first time in weeks. Even if it wasn’t much, he felt safe, maybe even safe enough to get some rest for once. Roman crawled into Virgil’s bed, covering himself in his very tasteful Jack Skellington covers, and tried to rest.

Roman’s hands still shook, and his head felt funny, but he eventually drifted off into a light sleep full of anxiety and nightmares.

[postwarlevi]

I'm back!

You're going to be sick of me with these random ideas in my head that I just wanna share.

So! Living with Levi in a nice little town. You know the kind, where everyone knows each other and you don't lock your doors and you and Levi run a cute cafe/diner.

Well!

I think Levi would be the gossip man. I just feel it in my bones that he would know the latest gossip around the place and he would tell you about the latest tea.

He wouldn't start this on purpose. It all came about because he looks like a guy you can trust, or that he's quiet. So, people just say crap around him. At first, he thinks it's annoying, but after a while he kind of just enjoys it. Especially, if he hears something really good and he just tells you as soon as he sees you next and you're just gasping in shock and excitement and the more you're into it, the more he is.

I just thought it would be a funny, yet cute thing about simple town living with Levi.

I don't know what you mean sick of! I love it!!

Randomness, I have 2 cats the same age of 13, one acts like a kitten still, but the other has been this little old man for years and likes his alone time and peace and quiet, but EVERY time one of the other 3 cats starts something and there's a commotion, this boy comes running out to see what is going on! It's hilarious. He's basically the nosey neighbor! Have you ever seen Bewitched? The neighbor Gladys Kravitz, that's him!

Anyway, I would love to live in this town! No worries, everyone knows everyone, you can literally go next door and ask for some sugar. There's cook outs on weekends and all the kids play together. Yeeees I want it!

And the small cafe has a good following thanks to your neighbors who also rave about it so visitors and people farther away come in and love it so much sometimes request specific pies/donuts/etc for small social events and you get buuuusy sometimes. And the neighbors love when you bring things to the party or give them a discount!

Oh yes, back to the nosey neighbor lol!

I can just imagine Levi asking you "why is Mrs Ricardo telling me about Mrs Mertz running off with the milkman?" (Lucy reference, anyone?)

"You mean that nice man Mr Foster? What the heck are you talking about?"

So he tells you that people just tell him stuff and you start laughing cause it's just that funny, but he doesn't want people to tell him stuff.

"That's crazy! Well, while you're at it see if you can find anything out about why every time it's my turn to carpool the kids the little Cleaver boy always seems to forget something? His homework, his lunch, his SHOES."

It never fails, he actually came running to your car without shoes one day and you had to send him back in, and all of this makes all the kids have to rush out of your car to school just so not to be late. You don't want to think anything bad of him or the parents, but how does one forget his own shoes?

And the next thing you know Levi is just an encyclopedia of information and you get a kick out of trying to figure what what's actually true or just plain embellished. Neither of you say anything to anyone (unless it would affect their safety) just keep it to yourselves.

Oh and the Cleaver boy? His older brother put him up to it because he was a crush on you and can see you for longer in the driveway. BUT you didn't hear that from the boys best friend father Mr Haskell! (sound familiar? LOL)

"What? That's adorable!" You gush.

"No it's not. He's a bratty little preteen." Levi huffs.

"Levi stop, didn't you ever have a crush on an older woman?" You grin.

"Are you calling yourself old?" He doesn't answer the question as you both banter back and forth.

"Hey, you wanna hear about what Mrs Brady told me about who Major Nelson is dating since he got back in town? Apparently she's into the supernatural!"

[commander-spaceboy]

do you have any new skimbleshanks headcanons?

Constantly and always!!

(Another one i started writing & 4gore 2 post 😭)

Ive been thinking a lot about how he would have ended up with the jellicle cats so have some of my ramblings lol

- Skimbleshanks probably hasn’t always lived in the junkyard with the Jellicles. Him joining them is something that would have happened in in his young-adult/late kitten years.

- Maybe as a kitten he was a barn cat or maybe he was raised in a foster home with his mother, but either way he ends up being adopted by a train conductor who was looking for a cat who he could take to work and travel with.

- Taking him to work means traveling on a train, and traveling on a train means he’d get to see many places and meet lots of other cats, and at some point he would end up meeting one of the jellicles near the train station.

- if we’re thinking of like the oldies gen. then he might meet Jenny or Bustopher, Jenny would probably take him directly to the jellicles, while Bustopher would start with getting him a good meal and showing him where he can get the best pets from people then taking him to the jellicles to introduce him to his friends and family.

-kinda like the idea of Bustopher meeting him first cause like Skimble would still be young and charming enough (not as much as he when hes older) but like majorly awkward and still not confident on his own 4 legs. N then he meets this really cool and confident cat who could charm just about anyone, and Skimbles like ‘ohhh i wanna b like that,,…’ so he ends up hanging around him and the other Jellicles a lot while he’s in town.

-All of the jellicles he meets are very nice to him, and everyone seems to like him, (it also helps that he picks a couple of things up from bustopher) but jenny, jelly, & Asparagus are his favorite to hang out with. They accept him into their little group really easily, and it at a certain point feels like he’s always been there.

- Eventually he’d get close to Asparagus,,, like real close with asparagus, and he’d decide that this is what he wants to be his home. Obv he could never give up his job on the train, but maybe he could miss a couple to spend more time at the junkyard.

Ignore this if it doesnt make sense lol im not proofreading this but u knowwww

[writers-worst-nightmare]

Kittens (Keith x reader)

Song you are singing

Warning(s): A TON OF CUSSING, reckless driving, got lazy at the end, Keith loosing one of his lives

THIS IS A REAL LIFE AU WHERE THERE IS NO SPACE OR ANYTHING AND THEY ARE ON EARTH

Fandom: Voltron

Word Count: 1,510

Pairing(s): Keith x reader

Genera: chaotic fluff

A/N: this is basically a Voltron version of “no braincells“ but I added a twist to make things more interesting

Request are always open!

Keith stared at the tiny kittens surrounding him, he froze in place and looked up to you as a plea of help witch was rudely declines when you started snickering before bursting out into laughter. Soon the whole crew joined in on laughing at Keith with a bunch of kittens. Pidge was snapping pictures and uploading it to their Instagram, Lance was recording a tiktok, Shiro was trying to get the cats off of Keith, Hunk was laughing, and you where adding more cats to the pile on his lap. “Y/N DON’T ENCOURAGE THEM!” Shiro scolded. You rolled your eyes before grabbing a small black and white kitten and placing it on Keith’s lap. The crew had decided to meet up after band practice and stay at your house. Little did they all know that you fostered animals, you had a couple of dogs and Birds but you mainly fostered cats cause they look so fucking cute.

“But it fuuunnnn!” You wine, only making Hunk laugh even harder until he was literally on the ground laughing so hard.

“They are kind of cute…” Keith muttered as he stared at the cats and back at you and then back at the cats.

“Why don’t Keith and I go to get some cat stuff at the mall, you three can make yourselves at home by the way!” You called as you dragged Keith into your car and hopped in the drivers side.

“Oh no…” Keith muttered as he stared wide eyed at you starting the car.

“What?”

”Please don’t tell me—“

”Oh, yeah I am driving!”

“LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!”

You locked the car doors and started to drive on there highway. Keith relaxed a bit as he thought that you where going to be normal

Big mistake

As soon as you saw all the muscles sink into the car seat you smirked and pulled up a radio station. Since Keith hasn’t been with you in the car before (for a good reason since everyone that has let you drive a car was gotten sick) he didn’t know that you LOVES music. Probably even more then you loved anime (which was saying something).

The fuck? Hold on Bitches got beef but don't wanna fight me Quit all that barkin', ho, bite me Bitch Hold on

”What the fuck is this?” Keith asked as he started to lean forward before the song started and you higher Ed the volume all the way up

Bitch, you fat, need a tummy tuck (Yep) You dropping diss songs, man, bitch, get your money up (For sure, then)

”It is called ‘go best friend’ and it is awesome” You answered as you rolled down your window and started singing along to the beat of the song and speeding slightly.

If you 'bout it, then run it up Used to be cool with this bitch, but she mad that I'm coming up

Keith hesitated softly before pulling up the lyrics on his phone and starting to sing along slowly. Afraid of what would happen next. You turned right and got on the off-road. Keith stiffened as he has heard one to many times what happens when you go off road and onto the dirt paths that you have most likely made yourself.

You a thot, you gon' suck it up I got a white bitch in the club, wanna pump it up (Woo, woo)

You started speeding even faster the before and Keith was prepared for the worst. Looking for a pencil and a piece of paper before settling on a anime journal that you had and a pen

Fuck a speech, I'ma sum it up $hy on the track and you already know she gonna fuck it up (Ayy, yeah) Bitch need to worry 'bout a bag I'm rocking these shows, and that's why she mad (Aha)

”I am going to give Lance my fuck you energy, Shiro my Hot Topic shirts, Pidge my suicidal thought, Hunk my fuck boy energy, and y/n my outmost hatred.” Keith started to say as he wrote out his will.

“Oh come on I am not that bad of a driver!” You pouted, looking away from the road and staring at Keith. Keith widened his eyes and grabbed the steering wheel so he could drive.

After this diss, you goin' out sad Bitch, you not bougie, you don't got no class (Bitch) Turnt in the booth and I'm piped off that gas Spin on yo' block, then we hitting the dash (Shoot, shoot)

”The last time you said that Pidge ended up in a flicking tree!” Keith argued, holding back the urge to choke you out, you rolled your eyes and elbowed the emo boy out of the way to take control of driving

It's still love for you, though But, bitch, I'm 'bout to get on your ass (Haha)

You started screaming the lyrics and Keith’s heart seemed to be going backwards as he grabbed his phone and gripped it tightly in his hands before button the record button.

$hy gotta potty mouth You wanna talk shit? Bitch, let's talk 'bout your body count You stink, throw your body out Tryna hang wit' the kid, I'm the life of the party now (Yeah)

He stopped the video and sent it to the “why do we still exist?” Group chat that consist of the gang

-character development Sasuke sent a video-

Non-binary owl: WORK IT Y/N YEAAAH

Sapnap but better: oh no…

Panda dude from beastars: have you written your will yet?

-character development Sasuke sent a picture-

Character development Sasuke: already got it written out

Won’t shut up about how bisexual this man is: I GET FUCK YOU ENERGY?!

Sapnap but better: I GET FUCK BOY ENERGY

Non-binary owl: can we all collectively agree to play/sing WAP at Keith’s funeral

Your lil' sister look up to me (Yeah) Bitch, you can't rap and you really not touching me (No) Just like a virgin, lil' bitch, cannot fuck wit' me And I never been pussy, bitch, you know what's up with me (For sure, then)

Won’t shut up about how bisexual this man is: As long as I get to do the dance

Panda dude from beastars: NO ONE IS PLAYING WAP AT ANYONES FUNERAL

Panda dude from beastars: Look Keith you are going to be fine

Why this bitch wanna pop shit? We was just cool, now this bitch wanna act like a opp bitch (The fuck?)

“What happens if I go off the edge…?” You wonder out loud, Keith looks up at you with a panicked expression.

Oh, she mad she can't stop shit Said that my breath stink 'cause I'm spittin' that hot shit (Hot, hot)

“NO Y/N DON’T GO OFF THE EDGE! THIS IS NOT FUCKING MINECRAFT!!” Keith lectured as he tried to roll down the window but silently cried to himself as he realized that you had child’s lock on.

Quit all that barkin', lil' bitch, and come bite me Bitches got beef, but they don't wanna fight me (Wait, wait)

You ignored Keith and smiled up yourself as you almost ran over some ducks

Turnt to my music, but swear they don't like me You got my number, ho, FaceTime, Skype me These hoes wanna be me I'm on your radio, soon I'ma be on your TV John Cena, bitches can't see me (Nope) I'm goin' up, and it's hella fans wanna meet me (Hey, haha)

“WHY DID YOU ALMOST RUN OVER DUCKS?!” Keith screamed as he plastered himself against the window.

Bitches don't get me Bitch, why you hatin? You could've been goin up with me (For sure, then) Spear on the bitch like she Britney You could dissed any bitch, but instead, you gon' pick me (Okay, the fuck?)

You did a wide turn and Keith practically flew in the air, he got up off the floor and cursing the seatbelt for failing to protect him against your ruthless grasp.

Make a bitch wanna hit me (Ayy, ayy) Bitches be cap on my name, the shoe did not fit me (No, it didn't) Show these bitches no pity (Yeah) These bitches wanna be friends, admit it, you miss me (Go)

Keith peered over the dashboard thanks to him now being on the floor and distantly saw the mall “YESSS WE ARE ALMOST THERE!!!!” Keith exclaimed as he got exited ready to leave this hell hole that mortals calls a car

Wrap up the beat like a doobie I don't give a fuck 'bout opinions, you know I'ma do me (Hey, hold on) Bitch, you a gnat, you a groupie Told that lil' bitch it's some snacks, and we pulled up with Scoobies

you lowered the volume to one as you pulled up in the parking lot and slowed down the car before parking somewhere close to the mall. You didn’t even look bothered to the fact of your reckless driving while Keith was looking like a whole tumbleweed fell over and hit him in the rib cage.

[css1992]

Guilty Pleasure

[Porn AU]

Summary: Peter and Beck used to be a power couple in the porn industry, but after Beck dumps him, Peter is forced to start over. With no money, no family and nowhere to go, he doesn’t have much choice other than to keep doing porn, so he joins Just4Fans to get back on his feet and then one day he gets a very generous tip from someone under the username of YKWIM.

All the warnings listed on Part I apply.

Read on AO3

Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V / Part VI / Part VII / Part VIII / Part IX / Part X /  Part XI / Epilogue

-x-

As it turned out, Tony did make great pancakes. Peter woke up the next day to the smell of them, and shyly headed in the general direction it was coming from, until he reached the kitchen. Tony was standing there, wearing impeccable gray dress pants, a crisp white shirt and a green tie, as he added batter to a frying pan. Peter supposed that was what heaven would look like when he died.

“Oh, hey, kitten, you’re up.” He grinned at him, who smiled in return, nodding. He had put his clothes from the night before back on, and he was glad he did, because Tony was dressed to the nines and it would have been awkward if he had shown up in just his boxers or something. “Sleep well?”

“I did, thanks.” And it was surprisingly true. Peter hadn’t had such a good night’s sleep in a while, he supposed he missed sleeping next to someone. He did share a bed with Beck for two years, so it felt awfully lonely to sleep by himself. “Are you headed to work?” He asked as he sat on a stool by the kitchen island and Tony nodded guiltily, fixing two plates of pancakes.

“I’m so sorry, I tried to make arrangements to get the morning off, but duty calls.” To his credit, he did look genuinely sorry, so Peter thought maybe it wasn’t just an excuse to get rid of him. Maybe.

“It’s okay, I have to be home soon, or my friends will worry.” Which wasn’t exactly true, but not exactly a lie either. They wouldn’t notice he was gone until lunchtime, since they both had work or class in the morning, but when they did notice, they would freak out.

“I thought you lived by yourself?” Tony sounded interested as he sat beside him by the kitchen counter and pushed a plate his way. Peter thanked him, taking a bite of the surprisingly good pancake.

“I do, but we live in the same building, so we’re always checking in on each other.” Tony hummed, nodding, and they were silent for a little while, until the older man spoke up again.

“Can I ask about your relatives?” He felt his eyes on him and knew that, much like the night before, he was testing the waters, making sure Peter was comfortable with that subject.

“Sure. I don’t have any, though. I’m an orphan, I’ve lived in foster homes for most of my life.” Peter didn’t really mind talking about that period – it was basically all he knew. He was too little when his parents died and was only ten when Ben and May passed away, so the foster homes were where he made most of his memories.

“Oh. I’m so sorry to hear that.” Tony winced, maybe thinking he had touched a sensitive subject after all, but Peter smiled and shrugged.

“It’s okay, it was a long time ago. My friends are like family to me now, so I’m good.”

“I’m glad you have them.” Again, he gave him that genuine smile that made Peter believe he was actually glad to hear that. Like he actually cared. “So… Can I see you again? Or was this just a one time thing?” The older man turned his body to face Peter, who froze for a second with the mug held to his lips, mid-sip.

“Oh, uhm…” Peter almost chocked on the coffee, not quite believing his ears. He honestly thought that the older man would slowly disappear from his life. Or maybe not even that slowly. Peter figured he had gotten what he wanted, so why would he stick around? “I mean, sure. If you want.” He said, like an idiot, and Tony raised a brow.

“I really do, but I don’t mean to pressure you, so if you want to say no and just go back to what we had, that’s okay. Or not even that, if you prefer. Just say the word and I’ll get out of your hair.” He sounded honest enough, but Peter quickly shook his head, eyes wide.

“No, it’s okay, I definitely wanna do this again.” He assured him, and Tony seemed satisfied with his answer, expression softening as he nodded.

After breakfast, the older man insisted on driving him home and when they arrived at his building, he felt a little awkward as to how to say goodbye, but Tony made it easier by simply leaning in and kissing him softly on the lips, one hand stroking his knee in a gentle caress.

“I’ll call you later, kitten.” He promised and Peter just sighed quietly, feeling dizzy.

He was a little out of it for the rest of the day, both Ned and MJ asked what was wrong with him in separate occasions, but he just said he was tired from his new routine. They had dinner together and when he went back to his apartment that night, he was just mildly surprised that he actually got a call from Tony. It was an innocent, sweet phone call, too. He did not expect that, to be honest, they had been sexting for two months and they had actual sex the previous night, so he kind of expected Tony to just go for it.

But no.

He asked about his day, about his friends, he told him about his own day, then somehow they ended up talking a little bit about Peter’s childhood, his parents, aunt May and Uncle Ben, it was just a really nice chat, which he appreciated. Not that he didn’t enjoy talking dirty to Tony, but the fact that he called just to have a normal conversation with no second intentions was, well. Nice.

He didn’t really know where they were going with that, probably nowhere, really, Peter was an ex-porn star, Tony was an A-list celebrity, a billionaire and a fucking Avenger, so there was literally zero chance they could evolve to something else. They would probably just go out a few more times, have mind-blowing awesome sex, and then go their separate ways. And Peter was okay with that.

It was fine. Really. It was just fine.

And it was for the best, otherwise how would he explain to Ned and MJ that he was dating Tony Fucking Stark? It would be a nightmare. MJ would kill him and lecture him on how big corporations like Stark Industries were destroying their way of life and Ned would pass out – and possibly die – so, yeah. It was a good thing they had no real future together.  

That didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy it while it lasted, though. Tony was really nice, a true gentleman, a good conversationalist, a great kisser and an amazing lay. So whatever he could get out of those moments they had together, he would. Everything was perfectly fine and under control. And did he mention fine?

The next morning, he woke up early and went for a jog around the block. He had been experimenting with different types of workout routines, but he thought he might stick with jogging and yoga for a while, he was even looking for a yoga studio close to his building so he could start training more seriously. When he got back, he took a long shower, made breakfast and spent a few hours answering people on Just4Fans, then posted a few pictures there, linked it to his twitter account and let people know on Instagram.

Tony texted him mid-morning and Peter blushed like a teenager when he read his message.

“Just saw the new pics, you look stunning as always, baby, but I have to admit I’m spoiled now, pictures are not enough. Can’t wait to see you again. Dinner tomorrow?”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, sir, keep it coming.” He smiled to himself and bit his lower lip, excited by the prospect of seeing Tony again so soon. “Tomorrow sounds great, where are we going? Should I start stressing about the dress code?”

“I was thinking you could come over. Did I mention that I’m a great cook? Pancakes aren’t my only specialty.” Peter felt butterflies in his stomach. It was stupid, of course, but he just found it endearing that Tony wanted to cook for him.

“I’d love to. I’m curious about your cooking, your pancakes did taste fantastic.” Just the thought of that morning and, more importantly, the night before that, made his mind wander, as a quiet sigh left his lips.

“Prepare to be blown away.”

“You’re so humble, I love that about you.” The young man smiled to himself.

“Thank you, kitten, it’s one of my many qualities.” Peter laughed at his antics.

They settled on a time and Tony insisted on picking him up, even though it was obviously inconvenient since they were having dinner at his place, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer, so Peter gave in. They talked a little more, but soon Tony had to go back to work and now that the younger man knew exactly who he was, he imagined it was a lot of work.

He went on with his Saturday – in the afternoon, he took a few pictures and videos with different sets of lingerie he bought with MJ when they went to Victoria’s Secret, and that should be enough to last him at least a few days. At dinnertime, he went down to his friends’ apartment, as usual, and they were both home.

“What’s up, nerd,” MJ greeted from the couch, but didn’t raise her eyes from her phone.

“Hey, Pete, dinner is almost ready,” Ned called from the kitchen island.

“Want me to set the table?” He walked over to where Ned was fishing a plate out of the microwave.

“Sure.”

Peter knew his way around the kitchen, so he got to work, placing the plates and cutlery on the small, square table by the counter.

“Hey, are you up for a Star Trek marathon tomorrow night? I don’t have any classes next Monday morning, we can stay up late.”

“Oh, uhm. I –“ Fuck, he hadn’t really thought of an excuse for why he wouldn’t be having dinner with them. “I can’t, because…” He noticed that MJ had finally raised her eyes from her phone, only to stare at him suspiciously. “I have this thing, uhm, on my Just4Fans… Tomorrow night.”

“Can’t you just schedule the posts?” MJ asked from the couch, because of-fucking-course she knew about that.

“Uhm, yeah, I can, but – uhm. It’s a live stream. I’m live streaming tomorrow for the first time. It’s good for tips and stuff, so. Yeah. I’ve already let everybody know, I can’t cancel.” He gave them an apologetic smile, trying to look convincing, but he was pretty sure he just looked like a nervous wreck.

“Oh. Ok, then.” Ned shrugged and didn’t seem bothered at all, but MJ kept staring at him from the couch, like she could smell his bullshit from a mile away. She didn’t say anything, though, for which he was grateful.

The next morning, he woke up early and decided to skip his usual jog around the block and just did a short yoga session in his living room, warmed by the morning sun that flooded his apartment at that time. He had lunch with his friends and spent the afternoon with them, but left early with the excuse that he had to get ready for his “live stream”.

When the older man texted to say he was waiting outside, Peter was already showered and dressed and skipped downstairs two steps at a time. He didn’t know what he was supposed to wear to a billionaire’s house, but he decided casual was probably fine, so he put on a pair of light blue jeans and a light pink, thin sweater.

Tony was driving a low-profile, black SUV and he got out of the car when Peter stepped outside the building. He had a baseball cap and tinted glasses on, dark blue jeans, a Metallica t-shirt and sneakers, and if Peter didn’t know it was him, he would never have thought that was actually Tony Stark.

“Hey, gorgeous, looking good.” Tony didn’t think twice before reaching out to pull him closer by the hips, stealing a chaste kiss from his lips. Peter blushed and completely forgot he should be worried that Ned or MJ might see them if they came downstairs for something, or even if they looked out the living room window. He wrapped his arms around the older man’s neck and deepened the kiss.

“Thanks, but you should get your eyes checked.” He joked as he let go, taking a small step back.

“Yeah, I think so too, I think constantly staring at such beauty is taking a toll on my eyesight, I’m an old man, after all.” Tony pulled him by the chin and stole yet another kiss. When he pulled away,  Peter shook his head and laughed.

“Oh my God. Seriously, do you practice these lines in the mirror or something?” He had a feeling that if it was anyone else saying half the things Tony said to him daily, he would find it corny and possibly annoying, but somehow the older man made everything sound charming, sweet, sexy, endearing – hell, everything at once. And he always knew what to say to make Peter’s knees go weak, it was unnerving sometimes.

“No, you just inspire me daily, baby.” He gave him a charming smile, as he opened the door and gestured for Peter to get in the car.

The ride to Tony’s place was filled with the sound of the older man humming along to the music playing. Peter didn’t recognize any of the songs, it was a classic rock playlist, but then he heard a familiar beat and thought it was a great opportunity to stick his foot so deep inside his mouth he almost choked.

“I love Led Zeppelin!” He didn’t exactly love Led Zeppelin and he was quite sure he had just heard a cover of that song, not the original version, but he thought he’d sound cool if he said that. When he looked over, though, Tony was laughing his head off. Peter blushed a deep crimson, eyes widening as he realized he must have said something incredibly dumb.

“Oh, you’re not joking.” Finally seeming to realize that the younger man wasn’t laughing along with him, Tony turned down the volume, as they approached Stark Tower’s garage entrance. “That’s Back in Black by AC/DC, kitten. But hey, I love Zeppelin, too, who doesn’t?” He smiled warmly, looking at him sideways, and Peter nodded.

“Oh, right. Yeah. Of course.” Fuck his life. Of course he had to make a complete fool of himself right at the beginning of the night. He wanted to jump out the window from embarrassment, but it would only add to his humiliation, since Tony had already parked and got out of the car.

The older man opened the door for him and Peter avoided eyes contact, as he led him to the elevator. He could still feel his cheeks burning on the ride up, his head was starting to hurt from shame. Was that a thing?

“Hey, don’t be like this.” Tony pulled him into a loose hug, kissing his temple with a soft smile on his lips. “It was an honest mistake. Besides, I wouldn’t be able to identify whatever it is you kids listen to these days.”

It was oddly comforting to hear that. Even though he knew Tony wasn’t trying to be mean to him back in the car, it was hard not to feel attacked in situations like that. Beck always tried to make him feel dumb, inferior and juvenile whenever he got the chance.

So he rested his head on Tony’s shoulder and nodded slowly. He was going to say something like “don’t worry, I’m fine” but it got lost somewhere in the back of his throat when the older man held him a little tighter and stroked his hair.

The whole interaction lasted merely a few seconds, soon the elevator doors opened to the familiar sight of Tony’s living room, looking just as impeccable as it did a couple of nights earlier. The older man gestured for Peter to lead the way and he did, paying closer attention to the details, since he was a little too nervous to do it the last time he was there.

What he realized when he took a look around, was that the penthouse didn’t look lived in at all. It was all glass and metal, shiny floors and sophisticated furniture, black and gray decoration – it looked ready to be featured in one of those shows that listed the most beautiful houses in the world, but it didn’t look like a place he would like to go back to at the end of the day.

“You don’t spend a lot of time here, do you?” Peter asked, as Tony led them in the direction he remembered the kitchen and the dining room were.

“That obvious, huh?” The older man winced and Peter flushed, realizing he might have been a little rude in his observation. “But yeah, when I’m home, I spend most of my time down in the workshop.”

“Ah, the famous workshop. I suppose if I were to visit right now there would be pictures of me hanging on every wall?” He joked, remembering that Tony had once told him that he would hang his pictures in the workshop and never get any work done.

“I mean, not every wall…” He turned to him and winked, leaving the younger man a little unsure if he meant it or if he was just messing around. Sometimes it was hard to tell with the man’s sarcastic sense of humor. “I’ll give you a tour after dinner.” He promised, when they finally reached the dining room.

The table was set in a simple manner, for what Peter was glad, it made him feel more comfortable and at ease. Tony pulled out a chair for him then headed to the kitchen, which was separated from the dining room only by a long, wide counter, where the had breakfast the other day.

The man came back with wine, pouring two glasses for them, then he started placing the dishes on the table. There was mashed potatoes, grilled veggies and roast chicken, and the smell was to die for, Peter’s stomach rumbled and he wasn’t even that hungry.  

“Voilà. This was my favorite meal as a kid, my grandma used to make this for me all the time when I spent summers with her.” He took a seat across from Peter, looking at him expectantly. The younger man found his enthusiasm amusing, so he fixed a plate under Tony’s eager supervision. “Tell me what you think. But be nice, I haven’t cooked this in a while, it might be a little dry.”

Peter took a bite of the chicken first, and it took him a few moments to feel the explosion of flavors on his tongue. The meat was tender and juicy, cooked to perfection, and the seasoning tasted inexplicably like home – it didn’t taste like something he could order at a restaurant, let alone a frozen meal he could buy at the supermarket. He then tried the mashed potatoes along with the grilled veggies and almost cried.

“Tony, this is so good, have you considered dropping everything and starting a restaurant?” he gushed, taking another bite of the chicken only to confirm that, yes, that was probably what paradise tasted like.

“Don’t exaggerate. I already like you plenty, kitten, you don’t need to flatter my cooking skills.” Tony smiled, shaking his head lightly, and if Peter didn’t know any better, he might think he was blushing.

“I’m not, this is seriously the best homemade meal I’ve ever eaten,” he insisted and Tony cocked his head to the side, with a confused smile and a frown

“What the hell have they been feeding you, kid?” He asked and Peter chuckled.

“Well, I spent most of my life in foster care and I was never lucky enough to end up in a family that liked to cook.” The families he stayed with weren’t bad – not compared to some of the horror stories he heard from other foster kids he met in the past – they just weren’t good. They provided him with the bare minimum for survival, so water and enough food to avoid starvation. “And uncle Ben and aunt May, dude… They couldn’t cook for shit.” He laughed, remembering Aunt May’s date loaf, which was probably the worst thing he had ever tasted in his life.

“Well, now I feel obligated to feed you properly,” Tony announced, and Peter quickly shook his head, feeling his face grow red for the hundredth time that night.

“Oh, no, you don’t need to, I wasn’t–”

“I want to, if I’m your only source of good, homemade food, then I’m taking this seriously, kitten.” He pointed a fork at him as he spoke. “And you can help me cook, what do you say? That way I can teach you a thing or two so you won’t starve to death.” Again, the idea that Tony wanted to cook for him was too sweet. He was an incredibly busy guy who probably didn’t even cook for himself, but he was willing to waste that kind of time on Peter. It just–

“Sounds amazing.” He smiled, nodding, and the older man’s face softened when their eyes met.  

“Good.” He took a sip of wine and topped off both of their glasses. “Did you tell your friends you were coming here today?” That seemed like a polite way to ask if they knew about him, and Peter wasn’t sure what kind of answer he was expecting.

“No, they think I’m home.” He watched the man’s face, waiting for his reaction, but there was none, so Peter felt like he should explain himself further. “After my ex – they’re just a little too overprotective, so, you know. I just don’t want them to worry.” Tony raised his eyebrows and Peter’s eyes widened, realizing what that might have sounded like. “Not that I think you’re my – that we’re – I mean, I’m not assuming anything, I just meant –“

“Hey, it’s okay, I know what you mean.” He reached across the table to squeeze one of his shaking hands. “Your friends sound like good people, by the way. You’re lucky to have them.”

“Thanks.” Tony smoothly changed the subject and started talking about his summers with his grandmother and how she taught him everything he knew about cooking. He said that was the reason why his repertoire consisted only of comfort food and Peter thought that was the sweetest thing he had learned about him so far.

Once dinner was done with, Tony kept his promise and gave him a tour. The place looked like a labyrinth made of glass and steel, there were five floors, several rooms with various purposes, but everything seemed sterile and impersonal, like nobody ever stepped foot in any of those places, which somehow made them look lifeless and even a little scary – like a ghost town of sorts. Peter couldn’t help but think that his tiny, mostly empty apartment felt more like a home than all five floors of Tony’s.

Well, all except for one.

“And this is the workshop,” Tony declared with a flourish when the glass doors slid open, revealing a wide, open space filled with worktables, holographic screens, robots, cars, Iron Man suits, and so many other things he had never seen before in his life. “Sorry about the mess.” He didn’t sound sorry, though, he sounded happy and proud, and Peter thought it was the only place in the penthouse that felt weirdly cozy and homey. To his relief – and secret disappointment –, there were no pictures of him in lingerie hanging on the walls.

“This is amazing…” Peter breathed out, realizing that that was Tony’s actual home. There was even a kitchenette in a corner, and next to it there was a small, cozy couch in front of a reasonably sized TV and a fluffy rug. He supposed Tony took naps there, too, because there was also a blanket draped over the back of the couch.

He walked over there, followed closely by the older man, and took a seat, sinking into the soft pillows.  

“I think this is my favorite room.” He blinked up at Tony, who regarded him silently for a few moments, and Peter started to think he had fucked up again. “What?” He whispered, but his answer came in the form of a kiss. He immediately melted into it, all worries flying out the window as he opened his mouth to taste him better.

Tony pushed him gently until he was lying on the couch with his larger body on top of him, and he’d be lying if he said that wasn’t the best feeling in the world.

It was a tight fit, but they made it work, as pieces of clothes were thrown to a pile on the floor; as skin met skin and made the room feel unbearably hot; as hands explored and mouths danced together and teeth left secret claiming marks on eager necks; as he felt, once again, full and sate and whole, and then spent and lax and dazed in the best of ways.

Suddenly, what had been frantic and passionate became slow and soft, what had been loud and messy became quiet and wholesome.  

The room was silent then, as their bodies slowly cooled down. Tony was lying on his back on the couch and Peter was lying on top of him, chests flush together, breathing in and out in sync. He felt a blanket being draped over his shoulders and he all but melted into the body underneath him.

“Can I ask you a question?” He whispered quietly into Tony’s neck, after several minutes, not sure if the older man had fallen asleep, his breathing was slow and constant.

“Baby, you could ask me anything right now, there’s no way I’d say no to you.” He answered right away and Peter giggled, pushing himself up on Tony’s chest to look down at him.

“Why did you want to meet me? For real?” Tony, whose eyes had been closed until that moment, opened them to gaze at him. He was quiet for a while, as one of his hands found the small of Peter’s back under the blanket and started rubbing circles on his skin.

“I liked talking to you.” He answered quietly, eyes locked on his. At first, Peter thought that was all the answer he was getting, and he would have been fine with that, but Tony kept talking. “You made me feel alive again.” His heart raced and his breath hitched in shock. He blinked down at the older man, who raised his free hand to tuck some of Peter’s curls behind his ear. “You see, things were… rough. After Thanos.” He remembered the funny story Tony told him in the restaurant a few nights earlier and was surprised to see such grief in the man’s eyes. “I had these nightmares. Anxiety attacks. Couldn’t sleep most nights.”

Peter reached out and ran a finger across the man’s forehead, trying to smooth down the frown that had formed there. Tony smiled, grabbing that hand to give it a little kiss.

“Pepper wanted me to give up the suit for good, said it was killing me and she wouldn’t stand by and watch it happen. On top of that, my relationship with some of the Avengers was strained, to say the least. I thought retiring from the Avengers would be enough to solve most of my problems, but I was wrong and everything just kind of snowballed from there. So what I mean to say is that by the time I met you, I was… Fucking exhausted.”

“Tony...” He frowned, heart clenching, because he could hear the pain in the man’s voice and how much he meant every word and it was devastating.  

“I looked forward to talking to you every night, you know. Still do. I don’t why you got under my skin like that, but you did. So when I said I needed to meet you, I meant I needed to meet you.” He smiled and Peter’s heart skipped a beat. The whole confession was almost too much to handle, too much to believe. At the same time, he knew what Tony meant because he had also been in a very dark place when they met and, somehow, talking to him brought some light back into his life. “My turn?”

“Sure.” Peter smiled, entwining his fingers on Tony’s chest and resting his chin on top of them, looking at the older man’s face.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to answer, I have a feeling this might be a bit of a touchy subject for you.” He cautioned, and Peter gulped. He knew what was coming and he thought about not answering, but Tony had been honest with him, so he took a deep breath and nodded.

“O-okay.”

“How did you end up doing porn? Not that it’s bad or anything, you just sounded so uncomfortable the other night... Like you’re ashamed of it, or regretful.” Tony asked carefully, one of his hands was still rubbing soothing circles on the skin of his back.

“Hm… Well. It’s complicated. I guess the short answer is: I was young and dumb and my older boyfriend convinced me it was a good idea. Then he left me and took all the money and everything we’ve ever built with him and – and now the only thing I know how to do is porn, so… Yeah.” It was a very short version of what happened, but very accurate as well. Tony frowned, raising an eyebrow.

“What do you mean he took everything?”

“He told me to pack a bag and leave. Whatever I couldn’t fit in my bag stayed behind, as well as the social media accounts, the channel, the money… He locked me out of everything.” Peter’s voice grew weaker as he spoke, because he felt so fucking ashamed. Of everything. Of admitting he let a man like Quentin into his life, that he made so many terrible decisions just so he could stay with him, only to be treated like that in the end. It was fucking humiliating.

Tony sat up in a haste, forcing him to do the same, until they were both facing each other on the couch. The older man’s eyes were wide, he looked so shocked it was almost funny. Almost.

“Peter, that’s – why – wait, and what do you mean he convinced you to do porn? Is it not something that you want to do?” Peter dropped his gaze for a second, not really sure what the true answer to that question was. If he was honest with himself, most times he just avoided thinking too much about what he was doing.  

“Well… I don’t hate it anymore, I guess,” he settled on that, after a few minutes of silence. “Sometimes I even enjoy it now, like… Like when we talk,” he mumbled the last part, raising his eyes again to look into Tony’s warm ones, and the older man looked back at him with – what? Worry? Regret? Guilt?

“So you hated it? Before?” He insisted, and Peter knew he could still choose not to answer if he wanted to, Tony wouldn’t force it out of him, but still – Peter wanted to tell him. He wanted Tony to know.

To know him. All of him. Even the parts that hurt.

“I did.” He whispered, holding back the tears that filled his eyes when the confession left his lips, because that was something that he never wanted to acknowledge. It took all he had to hold Tony’s gaze and not look away in shame. “I just felt… kinda shitty sometimes. Like… I wasn’t even human, just an object to be used and abused and disposed of.” He continued, swallowing a lump in his throat. He couldn’t read Tony’s expression, but his eyes were gentle as always, there was no judgment there. “I didn’t feel like my body belonged to me anymore.” Saying that aloud came almost as a surprise to Peter himself. He always tried so hard not to think about those feelings he almost believed they didn’t really exist, even though they were always there at the back of his mind.

“Pete...” Tony cupped his face in both of his hands, he looked so torn, it almost made Peter regret telling him.

“I’m doing okay now, I promise. I’m in control of my body, my choices, my money. I’m fine now, really,” he vowed and Tony pulled his head closer and pressed their lips together – it wasn’t even a kiss, just a caress.

“I can help you.” He offered with determination, holding his face in his hands, looking straight into his eyes and they were burning with anger, but Peter knew it wasn’t directed to him. “I can help you get everything back, I can make his life a living hell for doing that to you, I can –“

“Please, don’t,” He winced, shaking his head firmly, lifting his hands to hold Tony’s wrists, feeling his pulse and how fast his heart was beating. “Okay? It’s in the past. It’s over now. I don’t want to – relive it, I just want to forget.” His heart raced when the older man closed his eyes and started shaking his head. “Tony?”

“Peter, you can’t ask me to –“

“I am asking you leave it alone.” He insisted, a little desperately, but Tony’s face was locked in a frown and panic started creeping up on him. He couldn’t bear to think about confronting Beck, having to see him again, maybe talk to him again, he just wanted to move on, to forget he ever existed. His eyes burned and he closed them, trying to get his breath under control, but he could feel his hands shaking. “Please, please, don’t make me –“

“Hey, no, no, no.” Tony gathered him in his arms, rubbing his shoulders in a soothing way. “I’m sorry, no, I would never force you to do anything, okay? It’s your choice.” He cupped his face in his hands again, peppering kisses on his cheeks and forehead. Peter started calming down slowly, and even laughed a little when the man’s beard tickled his nose. “You know that I see you, right? And I mean I see you, Peter Parker, not the persona in the videos or the pictures, and you sure seem pretty fucking human to me, kid. You know that, right?” Tony kept holding his head in between his hands, forcing Peter to look back at him, which wasn’t necessary, he couldn’t look away if he tried.

He smiled, nodding slowly, leaning in to kiss his lips. The older man lay back down, pulling him along, until they were back to their original position. He rested his head on Tony’s chest and closed his eyes, sighing in relief.

He felt Tony wrap his arms around his waist, holding him tight, and he thought to himself that if heaven looked like Tony making breakfast in the morning and tasted like his cooking in the evening, it certainly felt like holding him at night.

-x-

Tag list (please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed from the list):  @sadachmesarthim @iamnotparticularlyproud @staticwhispersinthedark @bluestarker

Sorry for the long chapter, guys, it really got away from me 🥴 Only four more chapters to goo ✨✨

[clearsky]

My Top Comfort Characters/Kins and My Main HCs For Them

(Note, not all my kins/comfort characters are on here, just the ones I have more than 5 hcs for)

CW: Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3), Himiko Yumeno (DRV3), Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA), Kyoko Kirigiri (THH), Tsuyu Asui (BNHA), Entrapta (Spop), Ibuki Mioda (SDR2), Celestia Ludenberg (THH), Funtime Foxy (FNAF), Peril (WOF)

Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3)

Nonbinary

He/They pronouns

Autistic

Chains and loose accessories are for stimming

Likes the feeling of silk and cotton

Can't stand the feeling of anything rough or bumpy

He likes collecting small trinkets and the bones of small mammals

Can't stand anything salty. He'll eat it but he certainly won't enjoy it

Dating Rantaro

Can flirt, but only if he doesn't try

Petnames are a hell yea

Gets sunburnt really easily

Group dates with Celesnaegiri and Ikuzono

Can't cook for s h i t

Had a scene kid phase in middle school

Went to the same middle school as Celeste and Maki

Knew them when Celeste went through her "I'm not like other girls" phase and Maki was a Band Kid™

Himiko Yumeno (DRV3)

Female

She/Her pronouns

Lesbian

Can force herself to fall asleep within seconds regardless of where she is

100% forces herself to fall asleep when she doesn't wanna listen/talk to someone

Himiko/Angie/Tenko relationship. I'm calling them the Traffic Light Trio

She likes taking naps in the forest

She prefers enclosed/tight spaces more than open ones

Has several hundred stress balls and squishies laying around

She overheats easy

Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA)

Questioning his gender, but goes by any pronouns

Knows he's Asexual, at least

Has no clue what his romantic orientation is though

The kind of person to carry treats in his pocket just in case he runs into a cat

Will stop to pet literally every cat he comes across

Great at reading people

Doesn't talk unless it's 100% needed

Hangs with Tokoyami, Jirou, and Denki most often

Aizawa has 100% unofficially adopted him

Fosters kittens

Not a big fan of physical touch

He is 100% in the bakusquad. Anyone who says he's in the Dekusquad is a c o w a r d

He and Tsuyu vibe

Knows a bunch of random facts

Dark humour? Dark humour

*skates backwards into his therapist's room slowly sipping from an absurdly huge cup of coffee* Candice you're not gonna BELIEVE the shit I just went through

In case I forgot to mention it, he skates

Kyoko Kirigiri (THH)

Mtf

She/Her

Bi with female preference

Burns go up to her shoulders/collarbone/chest

Prefers to just listen as opposed to saying anything

Knows a ton of random trivia about everyone else in her class

She keeps a notebook she fills with all the trivia

Doesn't celebrate her birthday. She just doesn't see the point of it

Doesn't hate sugar/sweets, but if given the choice she would choose literally everything else

Cuts her own hair

A cat person

Permanent dark circles

T-Tall 😳

Like,,, 6'1 at LEAST

Only person taller than her is Yasuhiro (6'3)

Canon no longer exist

Ahahaha healthy life habits? What are those?

Can't handle horror games

She's the kind of person you'd go to if you needed to rant but didn't want any advice

Polyamourous yo

Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto

She's a dom yall are just scared to admit it

Tsuyu Asui (BNHA)

They go by They/Them

Lesbian

They and Ochaco are dating

They like to hang with Shinsou

Which mainly just means the two sitting in one of their dorms in near total silence doing whatever

Can speak English and French as well as Japanese

Learned English from cartoons

Picked up French bc they thought it'd be fun

Prefers to stay neutral in the whole Bakusquad / Dekusquad thing

They're invited to all outings/events by/for both squads

They like puns

They're a dumbass but willingly, and for fun

Like "someone says they like dark humour and they'll turn off the lights before telling a joke" kind dumbass for fun

Great at poker

Likes Disney Movies

Very touchy once you get close enough

Not in a sexual way, just likes physical contact

Especially fond of piggyback rides and cuddles

Extreme fear of needles

Entrapta (She-Ra)

She/Her or It/Its

Doesn't bother trying to figure out whether she's cis, trans, nonbinary, or what

Was AMAB though

Short as fuck (4'7)

Strong as fuck though

Cuddle game strong

Physical touch is a fuck yes

Cuddles

Piggyback rides

Hugs

Anything where she's touching someone is wonderful in her book

As long as she's the one that initiates it

Anyone else touching her without her permission makes her freak

Prefers being high up

Makes it harder for anyone to sneak up on her

An ace at video games

When it comes to sexuality she just says she's Questioning

Ibuki Mioda (SDR2)

Any pronouns + Pup/Pupself + It/Its

No idea what their gender is otherwise

Biromantic Asexual

Just likes sexual jokes

Gets distracted easily

Has severe hearing problems

She's plays her instruments as loud as possible, with the amp right next to her, without ANY ear protection

It's caused some damage

She talks so loud bc she has no idea how loud is considered acceptable

Wears hearings aids most of the time

Several piercings and tattoos

Likes hearing things jingle

She has a bracelet with a few bells hanging from it

She'll shake it whenever she's bored

LOVES hair accessories

Ribbons are a particular favourite

Occasionally she'll hang little charms from her hair "horns"

The kind of person who never takes any pills/medicine bc she keeps forgetting she has to

Frequently uses emojis

Skates everywhere but she isn't very good at it

She keeps crashing into everything

Has broken every bone in her body at least 3 times

Most of which was bc she keeps trying to kick in doors and skating down the stairs

Celestia Ludenberg (THH)

Nonbinary

Any pronouns, mainly goes by She/They

Bi, 70:30

Collects mini hand sanitizers and can tabs

Has single handedly gotten Mario Kart, Mario Party, Monopoly, Uno, and Clue banned a grand total of 17 times (and counting)

The kind of person to purposefully target someone regardless of what game was being played

Favourite victim is Byakuya (bc he gets so upset about it and she finds that hilarious)

Mains Waluigi

Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto

Has several banned Twitter accounts bc whenever she's bored she'll start discourse on purpose

Hangs with Korekiyo, Ibuki, Byakuya, Yasuhiro, and Leon most often

It's a weird friend group but everyone's sorta gotten used to it

She and Byakuya gamble together occasionally

She tries to avoid it bc he'll willingly blow his entire fortune in an attempt to beat her

Autustic

Can't stand the feeling of water

Mainly bc she can't swim for shit

Horror movies? Hates them

Gets flustered super easily

Taka is her twin brother

Kotoko, Kokichi, and Gundham are their half siblings (Same father)

Peko and Toko are their cousins

She sucks ass at go fish

Fuck canon she's 4'11 now

C h u b b y

Freckles

Once she gets comfortable enough with herself she dyes her hair in the peekaboo style

Either black and red or black and blonde

Haven't decided yet

I'll be doing Celesnaegiri hcs as a seperate post but I just feel it's important for you to know that she expresses her affection verbally and is a very touchy person

Went to middle school with Maki and Korekiyo

Has horrible eyesight

She wears contacts most of the time but she always puts off buying more

After the 5th or so time she ended up blindly stumbling around a week after her contacts ran out Kyoko convinced her to buy glasses as well

Religious accessories yo

Like chokers and dangly earrings with crosses and pentagrams and shit

Likes wearing wacky earrings

Can run and do all sorts of tricks in heels

She and Mukuro are exes yo

Keeps her hair short so it's easier to manage

Hair never gets longer than her shoulders if she can help it

She seems like the kind of person who'd keep her bangs grown past her eyes regardless of how frustrating or inconvenient it is

She's a sub yall just don't wanna admit it

Funtime Foxy (FNAF)

I'm going on the record to say this

Funtime Foxy is genderfluid and that is that

Goes by Funtime

Any pronouns, They/Them most commonly

Plays music (keyboard and guitar mainly)

They and Funtime Freddy (Freds) mainly play with the kids

Freds mainly tells stories with Bonbon while Funtime more so plays one-on-one

Has nicknames for everyone

Circus Baby - Ringleader

Ballora - Bells

Funtime Freddy - Partner

Bon Bon - Bun

Peril (WOF)

I like both Nonbinary She/They Peril and Mtf She/Her Peril

They're both such good concepts

She's a lesbian, Harold

She only had a crush on Clay bc he was pretty much everything she was supposed to like in a guy

Gimme a moment while I force all my mental disorders onto this poor child

Autistic, Anxiety (Social anxiety, mainly, but she has most types), Adhd, PTSD

I'd like to reiterate yet again that She's a lesbian

Sunny and Glory were her gay awakening

Peril in Book 1: Damn, Sunny and Glory sure are pretty. Anyone would be lucky to date them. Clay would probably go for them over me. He would be stupid if he didn't. I myself would willingly date them over someone like me. They're just so pretty :(

Peril waking up in a cold sweat in the middle of arc 2: WAIT-

Rarepair alert but Peril/Sora

Peril meeting Sora: "Hmmm She's attractive. I would love to date her. Too bad I'm straight and in love with her brother lmao :P"

Peril, a mere month later, waiting for Ruby to leave Jade Mountain, pacing in her cave, running face first into a wall: WAIT-

I remember reading this one amazing story where Sora taught Peril to read/write and Peril found out she set off the bomb and comforted her/convinced her her run so that's canon now

Btw if anyone can remember what that story was called/what platform it was on and could tell me I'd appreciate it very much

I'd even be willing to draw a character of your's or make you an icon or something

I usually don't accept requests bc I get burnt out easy but this is a special case

She runs into Sora again sometime between the beginning of TOP and the end

I like to imagine she just goes wandering around

Anyway she confesses like a mere few minutes after running into her again bc Peril is just subtle like that

The actual confession takes 15 minutes and the entire time Sora is just sitting here like "👁👄👁 sure"

Bam Peril/Sora

Peril plans to keep it a secret for a little while longer but she spends 3 seconds around Clay and pretty much blurts it out

Clay, who wasn't even aware that Peril was a lesbian, is just "👁👄👁"

I wanna say Clay doesn't know what a lesbian is but in my canon Sunny is a lesbian so Starflight has already told him

Anyway he's super supportive

From that point Peril is sorta open about her sexuality?

Like, she gives Clay permission to tell the rest of the D.O.D bc she isn't about to risk being in front of them when they hear the news

(When Sunny starts actively seeking her out as a hang out buddy and Tsunami, Glory, and Starflight appear to tolerate her presence just a bit more afterwards she pretends she isn't confused by the change)

She's pink, white, and blue bc I said so

If you look at a certain angle in the right lighting her eyes, mouth, fire, and under her scales all look purple

But her fire is normally white and blue bc I said so

Also she pale as fuck bc in my canon their fire just sorta burns their colour away

You know how you leave something outside for too long and it gets sunbleached? Where it gets all washed out?

Like that but more extreme

By the age of 10-12 firescale dragons are just white with pale eyes

That's right not even the eyes are safe

Ram horns :P

I'm also fond of Peril/Sunny

Or maybe Peril/Sora/Sunny

But Peril/Sora is the main thing

On the topic of that bringing in my hc that if one sib in a sib group is fire resistant all of them are

She,,, She can change her scale colour

But only slightly and only if her emotions are strong enough

Bc I don't give a fuck about Darkstalker's scroll we were robbed of hybrid Peril

Unfortunately all of Peril's emotions are strong

Rainwing ruff along her head and neck

It's like a hood

It's mainly smoothed to her sides but when she's startled it flares out

RAINWING PUPILS

Y'all will know what those look like as soon as I get off my ass :P

She,,, She can mimic bird cries

Hates the summer

She has more than enough body heat already and the outside is just hot enough to add on and make her feel sick

She can somewhat control her heat but most of the time it's based on her emotions

It can go from standing-in-the-middle-of-a-burning-building-cant-see-your-nose-smoke-is-so-thick heat (Strong emotion) to Hey-thats-a-nice-cozy-campfire heat (Calm/"weak" emotion/Sleeping)

I'm just gonna make a different post with all my Peril hcs cuz there isnt enough room for all of them here

[emotionalsuppork]

Heyyyy🦋 So for kind of reason I had to thought about tendo when I listened the song "scary love "from the neighborhood 🤓 so I wanted to ask if you could do a fluffy scenario based on the song with our small boy tendo?🤩Is it possible because I dont know if you do something like this D:

Okay so I wrote this rlly quickly because I wanted to get it out, but I'm currently fostering 3 kittens and one of them just got sick. I might re-write this later and add to it, but for now this is what I have down.

Also yes! Hi! I will write song fic!

This is kinda like a bunch of little scenarios based off individual lines from the song? I felt I could paint a better picture this way.

❤ Tendou ❤ ~ Scary Love - The Neighborhood 

Move to the city with me

Tendou's eyes blew wide.

What? Did you say?

You didn't move from your spot on the bed, leaning against the wall, curled into his side, safe in his warmth, with your legs tossed over one of his thighs. He had been idly dragging his fingers up and down your calves, only to abruptly stop when you spoke.  

You looked up at him, but he kept his gaze locked forward on your record player, the one he bought you, still spinning leisurely. The music kept playing, the world kept turning, but Tendou had stopped.

Then he started once more.

All at once he had snapped his gaze to meet yours, Vermillion eyes flitting over your entire body, long fingers wrapping around your ankle, questioning eyebrows knitted tight.

You tilted your head to the side in confusion.

Tendou tilted his as well, silently willing you to repeat your question. Lucky for him,

"Can I come with you?"

He let out a sharp sigh and shook his head, completely shocked, eyes still wide.

That was probably the last thing he had expected you to say to him coming over to your parents house to tell you that, since he had just graduated and wasn't planning on college, his parents thought it was best if he leave and figure out what he wants from life 'on his own dime'. Honestly after overhearing some stories from his classmates he had expected you to be angry. Then, as you opened your door and greeted him with a sweet smile and saccharine kisses, he realized that you wouldn't be angry with him, you'd never be angry with him. Which brought on his next realization, one that scared him even more.

You'd be sad.

The first thing he did when you agreed to be his girlfriend was swear that he would never hurt you. You had giggled and nudged his shoulder, telling him that you knew that and pecking his lips.

So he let you lead him into your room, let you put on a record, let you drag him into your bed, and tried to build up the courage to break the news that he was leaving.

And as he told you, you stayed sweet.

You listened attentively as he explained. You nodded empathetically when his explanation of the situation turned into venting about it instead. You stayed cuddled up to him when he went quiet and shifted to stare anywhere else. You let him have those few needed minutes of silence as you digested what he said to you.

Then you shocked the hell out of him.

Don't wanna be alone

Standing here now, in your nearly empty bedroom, Tendou wondered why he didn't see this coming. He wondered why he even bothered making you take a few days to really think about it. You were the one who brought up coming with him in the first place.

He turned his head to look at you, then flicked his eyes back and forth, from you to the boxes stacked against the wall. You rocked from heel to toe and back, looking up at him with the most innocent smile he had ever seen. He rolled his eyes and you laughed, bouncing over and throwing your arms around his neck.

"Don't be like that!" You tugged him closer, "We both know that neither of us could make it on our own."

No one has ever cared for me As much as you do

"Satori? What are all these?"

He looked up and quirked a smile at the box in your hands, making grabby hands at you and bringing you into his lap when you tried to sit next to him. You had obviously snooped a little bit, but all the photos were still arranged neatly enough.

"These are all the pictures of me growing up!" You grinned and, after asking permission which he granted with a laugh, quickly started flicking through.

He remembered most of them, hooking his chin over your shoulder and adding in little anecdotes to set the scene. You both were laughing so much you didn't realize it at first. But after a little while, you had to ask.

"Why are you always alone in these?" Turning to look at him you caught the sad smile crossing his features.

"I hadn't met Wakatoshi-kun yet." He took out a separate stack of photos. These were all with Ushijima and him, then ones of Semi started showing up, along with Reon too. He looked happy, but there was something about his eyes that bothered you. When you brought your hands up to his face and turned his head to look straight at you, he chuckled, confused. It turned nervous when you continued staring into his eyes. After a minute of you comparing the pictures in your hands to the Tendou you were sitting on, he seemed to realize something and he took out the last two stacks of pictures.

These pictures all looked completely different. He seemed perfectly content with the world. Like something had clicked into place.

"What changed?" He pulled a picture and held it up to your eyes.

"I met you."

Your love is therapy

Sitting him down on the bed you tried to pull away, only for his arms to tighten and drag you to sit in front of him, bracketed between his knees. Closing his eyes and squishing you into his chest, Tendou shakily breathed you in. A moment later your hands came up to rub his back and he shuddered.

"Satori?", he hummed quietly, "Are you...okay?"

A strangled laugh clawed it's way out of his throat. Your hands clutched at his hoodie and you leaned back to see his face. He let you, then quickly regretted it when your already worried eyes softened further.

"Hey, hey what's wrong? Satori please, talk to me."

God, how did you not realize you were too good for him.

"Do you like being with me?" His voice came out scratchy and he closed his eyes, not knowing if he could continue staring your concern in the eyes. He didn't mean to say that, but the alcohol was letting his vulnerability out to play.

"What? Of course I do. I love you, Satori." He thinks you're pulling away but then your hands come up to hold his cheeks, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones, “I love you, but I can’t help if you dont tell me what happened.”

He breaks.

"I ran into some old classmates at the party," He whispers, "It didn't go so well."

You deflated a little in his arms, wishing you could've gone with him, understanding now why he was so randomly insecure. You pulled away and your heart broke when he misunderstood and curled into himself.

Grabbing all the sweets, junk food, blankets and pillows in the apartment, you made him stand and change his clothes, pretending you didn't notice him watching you curiously. When you arranged everything and crawled into bed, Tendou just stood at the edge. You had never seen him look less sure of himself. You lifted the corner of the covers and smiled softly.

"Let's talk?"