#and i know no ones reading this and im just writing this for myself but its good for me to write all of this out somewhere
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Can you kill yourself already? Yoi suck at writing. Itd be better if you didnt waste your skills on doing this garvage. In fact, im sure you could go into sex workN id be more than happy to fuck you dumb. Lesbian my ass. You clearly need a good fucking to get your head back in order alien. Ive heard illegals would sell their body to stay in america maybe you should eotp wasting your time with writing and focus on finding a smart man to keep you iñ america. Plus you cant spell for shit and your grammar sucks.
The utter hypocrisy! Oh my god!
First off, if you're going to judge how I spell and use grammar maybe you should look over your ask first. But let's break this down, yeah?
No, I won't kill myself. Good question!
I am FAR from perfect at writing, I know, I can think of over five other authors that are better than me. That doesn't mean the hate is justified, people get better through practice.
I am confused about the part where you said "if you didnt waste your skills on doing this garvage" what skills am I wasting? You said I suck at writing which means I don't have the skills for it. You're contradicting yourself.
The whole sentence after that had my jaw on the floor. For context, I am still underage. I also am not interested in that area of work - personally I don't have any problems with it, so long as people are doing so consensually and it's not illegal then make that bank. If you hate me so much then why would you love to do as you said?? You wouldn't fuck someone you hated - especially after you admit you want me to kill myself.
The next couple sentences are a whirlwind. I am not an "alien", no one is actually but thats a whole different topic I don't want to get into. I don't think it is my place to get into it anyway. I don't live in America, surprise surprise, people can exist outside of the United States! Also I do doubt people are full on selling their bodies to stay in America. The tragedy that is going on over there is not capable of being solved in that way (again, I wont get into detail, its not my place nor is it the time currently). You say I should find a smart man as though you are one. If you were actually smart this hate comment would be so much easier to read and comprehend - not to mention it just wouldn't exist to begin with. You would have just blocked me.
This ask here is one I definitely wanted to discuss but there are more:
#dc universe#dcu#yandere batfam#yandere batfamily#yandere dc#dc robin#yandere#dc#blackbirds feathers#dc comics
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I See You As You Are - Pt 7
aemond x f!reader
Series Masterlist
Summary: The first couple of weeks and months following Aelors birth Aemond becomes more protective than you thought possible. You practically have to beg him to sleep. He reluctantly starts to accept the help people are offering the both of you. Life slowly starts to go back to normal as you both fall more in love with Aelor.
Warnings: 18+ soft family moments that made me want to crash out!, aegon appearance again, overprotective aemond, oral(f), fingering, p in v, breeding kink
Authors Note: i will forever spread my sibling agenda sry – idk why this took me so long to write just so many ideas all at once i guess 😵💫 but i love this series and im not abandoning her i just get too attached sometimes and don’t want to see it end - also don’t want to rush the writing of this bc i love it too much - me over explaining myself to no one but myself! n e ways enjoy i love u and i love this chap and story
Word Count: 8k
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It’s been a little over a week since you brought Aelor into this world and Aemond is positive he only sleeps when.. Maybe when he blinks. He needs to be aware of everything that moves inside your shared chambers. If you breathe too heavily he’s next to you. If Aelor coughs he’s hovering over the crib. You look up at his bloodshot eye with pursed lips as he escorts you back to bed.
“I don’t want you out of bed.” Aemond presses his lips to yours and helps you lay back into your well of pillows.
“And when pray tell, will me and Aelor be taken off of bed rest, maester Aemond?” he flares his nostrils and pulls your blanket up your body.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever let you two out of these chambers.” his tone is teasing but you both know how truthful his words are.
“Husband.” you look up at him.
“Hush.” he shakes his head. “There is nothing you two need outside of these chambers.” you clear your throat.
“Come lay with me.” you pat his side of the bed. He slowly crawls into the bed and you both turn and look at each other. “Tell me what you’re scared of.” your words soft.
“He’s so little and you’re still so fragile.” you narrow your eyes at him. “You know what I mean. I just don’t want either of you taken from me. Whether it be a misstep on stairs or a sickness. I won’t allow it.” he shakes his head. “I won’t. I can’t. I’ll die without you and our son. I will. I can-
“Aemond,” you cup his cheek. “We are right here. Healthy and safe.” you nod your head. “One more week.” you press your lips to his.
“One more week?” he mumbles against your lips.
“You have one more week to prepare to take Aelor and me on a walk throughout the gardens.” you pull back.
“I’m sorry I’m overbearing.” he whispers.
“There is no reason to apologize.” you brush his hair back. “Could I make one more request?” he nods, starting to get up. “Lay back down.” you chuckle. “Please go to sleep. I know you haven’t been.” you wipe your thumb under his eye.
“Do you promise that you’ll both still be here when I wake?” he whispers, pulling you closer to him and curling against you.
“Yes, Aemond. We will both be right here.” you smooth his hair back as he lets his eye close and finally begin to rest.
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You wake up and groan as Aemonds side of the bed is empty. You feel for any warmth but it’s cold and you roll over and look at the ceiling. Pushing the blankets off, you get up and walk over to Aelor’s crib and find him curled up next to the egg with his little fingers reaching out towards it. You brush his wisps of hair back before walking over to the table where you’re sure there’s a letter waiting for you.
~
Wife and my little son,
Please - for my sanity - do not leave these chambers until I return. I won’t be long, I just went to collect some things.
I’ve promised you a walk today - which I still plan to deliver.
I thought we could go to the library and we could read as a family. - Yes, I know you said the gardens.
Tonight is the full moon and I had hoped we might wish upon it as a family. - We’d have to go out a little earlier than normal.
My wish for the moon: Please don’t let my wife hate me for not letting her and Aelor out of our chambers.
~
You smile and walk the letter over to the side table and place it with your growing collection. You begin to dress for the day and a warmth settles over you when you hear Aelor start to coo. You quickly finish dressing and go scoop him out of his crib, placing kisses across his face. You carry him over to your chaise and curl up with him watching him smile and grab at your fingers.
You could stay like this all day, with the exception of having Aemond at your side, curled up with your son enjoying the silence and the song of the breeze through the windows. Though you can’t help but smile at the thought of being able to show your perfect son off. You rise with him and bring him over to the wardrobe to dress him for the day. You hear the door open and close before you hear the familiar steps.
“I half expected you both to be gone.” you can see relief wash through him from that not being the case.
“We would never dream of leaving you.” you walk over to him and he places his lips on your forehead before offering the same to Aelor. “And to address your letter we would never hate you, Aemond. We’re content here, with you.” you nod and he reaches down to press his lips to yours.
“How are you both?” you watch as he scans over the both of you.
“We’re very excited for you to take us to the library.” you smile up at him. “And to see his very first full moon.” you smile as Aemond brushes Aelors hair back.
“May I?” he holds his arms out and your eyes snap up to him.
“Aemond, of course.” you help place Aelor into his arms.
“He’s so perfect.” he whispers, looking down at him.
“Even if he threw up on you this morning?” he smiles and waves you off.
“Your mother is wrong.” he chuckles. “I wouldn’t even call it a spit up.” he traces his finger along his chin.
“Mm, is that why you changed your jerkin?” you hum walking back to the wardrobe to pick out clothing for Aelor.
Your heart swells as you hear Aemond silently coo and talk to Aelor and you push around different fabrics. You were secretly happy Aelor ruined his jerkin because you can finally have them match. You chew your lip pulling out the dark green fabric and basking in its softness. You hold it up and look over it smiling at his little buttons.
“It seems as if your mother is going to have us match today.” Aemond chuckles as he spots the green fabric in your hands.
“You two will look so handsome.” you coo.
“I thought we agreed that all three of us have to match?” he raises his brow walking over to you with Aelor. “Something about an early grave?” you purse your lips pretending to be lost in thought.
“I don’t recall.” you shake your head. You lift off Aelor’s current outfit and begin to pull the green over his head. “Oh my Gods,” you look up at Aemond. “Hold him next to you.” you nod quickly.
“Like this?” he cradles Aelor in one arm and you bring both of your hands to your cheeks.
“Aemond.” you softly coo. “You both look so handsome.” you push your bottom lip out. “My distinguished little gentlemen.” you walk over to them. “My sweet boys.” you smooth Aelor’s hair before cupping Aemonds cheek.
“Are you done?” your eyes snap up to him and you can see a hint of a smile.
“Nowhere near done.” you shake your head. “Let me just adjust some things.” you smile up at him quickly.
You start to adjust Aemonds hair and straighten out his jerkin. Aelor softly fusses when you smooth out his hair more. You move Aemonds arm to have Aelor more centered and push down his outfit from his neck. Aemond watches you with a small smile as you move them about as you please. You finally stand back and admire them both.
“May we escort you to the library?” he holds out Aelor’s arm to you and your heart melts.
“I would love nothing more.” you tickle Aelor’s neck before grabbing onto Aemonds other arm.
Aemond helps escort you down the stairs of your chambers and the second you step out into the hall you stop and look around to see if anything has changed. You have the same guard and the same tapestries adorn the walls all the way down the hall. There's a small buzz of people in the Keep at this early hour and you smile to finally be a part of it once more. You turn and brush Aelors cheek with your fingers before you take Aemonds arm.
The walk to the library is full of whispers to Aelor of his different surroundings. Aemond has kept a calculating eye on everything going on around the three of you. If someone walks too close he’s silently moving you to the otherside of the hall. You chuckle knowing what he’s doing and you pause and look up at him.
“Don’t you think people will want to see the new prince?” you raise your brow at him.
“We’re going on a walk to the library not a parade through the city.” he says louder than needed as he looks around at prying eyes. “If we stop for one person we will soon have a line.” you know he's right enough in the matter.
“Then let us go hideaway in the library.” you smile up at him, patting his arm.
He continues to lead you through the halls and when the massive wooden doors come into view a smile spreads across your face. Aemond pulls open the door for you and motions for you to walk towards his section. You watch as servants start to have tea prepared for you and light a couple of candles. You take your normal seat and open your arms for Aemond to place Aelor into.
Aemond pulls your book down from a shelf and takes his seat. When he turns his gaze to the both of you he’s glad he’s sitting because he’s sure his knees would give out. His wife and son, sitting in his chair, in his section. He brings the book to his lap and opens it in search of the last chapter you both left off on. You lean further back in the chair as Aemonds soft voice greets your ears. You begin to rub Aelors back as he starts to curl into your chest with heavy eyes.
“Do you think I’m boring him?” Aemond looks to you with a worried expression.
“No.” you shake your head once. “I think your voice is very soothing. Comforting. He probably feels safe and at ease.” you look down and see Aelor asleep on your chest.
“Should I keep going?” he whispers.
“I would like that and I think Aelor would too.” you nod with a smile.
Aemond continues on with the story in somehow an even softer voice than the one he started with. He pauses after every chapter and asks if you want him to keep going. Aelor eventually wakes and fusses until you place him in Aemonds arms. Aemond brings the book back to his lap and watches as Aelor spreads his hand across the current page. You watch them with a warm expression as Aemond attempts to continue reading. After the next chapter he closes the book and sets it back on the table to give his full attention to Aelor.
“Do you think he’ll enjoy reading as much as we do?” Aemond watches as Aelor grabs at his rings.
“If we keep this up I’m sure he will. Soon he’ll have his own section in the library.” you chuckle.
“Maybe you’ll take over my section.” Aemond whispers down to your son.
The rest of the afternoon is filled with Aemond reading to the two of you in short spurts. It only took three times of asking if he could walk you three around the Keep until he agreed on the condition that he can turn everyone away who asks to speak with the three of you. He holds you closely and once he sees your eyes start to droop he insists that the three of you return to your chambers for a nap and you had no complaints with that idea.
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The sun has barely passed the horizon and Aemond is trying to herd you and Aelor to the door with whispers that it’s almost Aelor’s bedtime and you should be fast asleep too. You bat his hands away which are immediately back on your waist as you start your descent down the stairs.
“Aemond, I know how to walk.” you sigh.
“I would prefer to carry you both.” you turn your head and he stops you on the stairs. “If you don’t pay attention I will.” his tone not joking.You turn your head back and start moving once more. Once you make it to the bottom of the stairs you stop. “What’s wrong?” he steps in front of you.
“I figured you wouldn’t want me to touch the door. It might be too strenuous.” you purse your lips.
“You’re right.” you watch his lips twitch up and you flare your nostrils as he turns to reach for the door handle.
“Aemond Targaryen.” you hiss and his eye snaps back to yours.
“Yes?” he wraps his hands around your waist.
“I’m not going to break.” you huff.
“I’m aware.” he presses his lips to yours in hopes of removing the soft scowl. “Can I not just dote on you? Is it not my job to do everything for you?” he pulls back.
“There’s a difference between doting and overbearing.” you hum and step past him to open the door and walk through.
“I’m sorry.” he makes his way to your side quickly. “Please don’t be mad at me.” he whispers and you stop once more. “Please, I’m sorry.” his heart starts to beat faster at the thought of upsetting you.
“I’m not mad at you.” you look up at him. “Now give me a kiss, offer me your arm, and take us to the gardens to look upon the moon.” you wait expectantly and you watch as a smile spreads across his face.
He presses his lips to yours before placing them on Aelors forehead and holding out his arm for you. He bites his tongue when you start down the main stairs and takes a step closer to you. You glance at him and he is already staring at you, calculating your every step.
“How are you feeling?” he whispers once the three of you make it to the main hall.
“Like I’m going to ask the full moon for you to relax.” you turn to him.
“Do you still love me?” he searches your eyes.
“My Gods Aemond of course.” you press your hand to his chest. “I love you more than life itself.” you cup his cheek. “I might love you even more if you take us out to the gardens as promised.” you smile up at him.
“You’re sure you still love me?” he steps closer to you.
“I’m sure.” your reach up and bring his lips to yours.
He starts to escort you once again through the main hall and you sigh in relief at the soft breeze that greets you once the three of you make it outside. You smile as you enter the gardens and adjust Aelor so he can look at all of the life growing around you. Aemond stays glued to your side and an arm hovering around you as you walk Aelor up to different flowers.
“This was the first place your father took me when we met.” Aemond’s heart skips at your words. “We’ve been coming here ever since.” you whisper carrying him deeper into the gardens. “Tonight is very special.” you turn to Aemond as you enter the small courtyard.
“It’s the full moon.” Aemond leans down and smooths Aelor’s wayward strands. “If you make a wish upon it when it’s full it’ll come true. I’ll make sure of it.” you smile watching Aemond softly talk to him.
“What your father didn’t tell you is that he’s actually the moon.” Aemonds eye snaps up to you. “He makes sure we have anything and everything we wish for.” you nod. “We’ll wish for you for the next couple of years but soon you’ll be able to do it on your own with us and you can teach your siblings.” your smile widens. “We can make wishes as a family.” you look up to Aemond and see that his eye is glossy.
“You want to have more?” he whispers.
“You didn’t think I’d be content with just one?” you tilt your head.
“How many do you want?” he steps closer, wrapping his arms around you.
“At least two more.” you nod.
“And at most?” he tilts his head.
“Four more?” he nods his head quickly.
“Yes, I would like that.” he rubs circles into your sides sending warmth throughout your body.. “It’s always up to you. I’ll be content with any number of children.” he lets his mind wander to your chambers filled with children running around and giggling. “A family.”
“Let’s make our wishes before you start crying.” you cup his face.
“I’m not crying.” he purses his lips.
“Mhm.” you nod, wiping your thumb under his eye collecting the tear. “I love you so very much.” you whisper up at him.
“It sounds as if you might cry now.” he watches your cheeks flush. “And I love you more.” he presses his lips to your forehead. “Look up to the moon so I can get you both back into bed.” he tilts your head up to the sky.
You let your eyes close and Aemond does the same, never letting his hands leave your sides. He smiles when he feels Aelor grab onto his arm and he cracks his eye open and looks down at him. He watches as his face spreads with a smile and he reaches up to Aemond. You open your eyes when you feel Aemond start to scoop Aelor out of your arms.
“My wish was to hold him and to offer you a dance.” he holds out his free hand.
“Let us dance on our balcony while he sleeps.” you offer him a warm smile.
“I would like that.” he nods. “What did you wish for tonight, my beautiful wife?” he hums, pulling you closer.
“I had wished for us to dance.” you chew your lip. “And for you to let me kiss you until I fall asleep as I once used to do.”
“Then let me keep you waiting no longer.” he offers you his arm.
You curl into his side as he leads you three back to your chambers. Aelor quickly falls asleep in his crib allowing Aemond to whisk you out to the balcony. His hands are on your waist instantly as he begins to sway the both of you across the stone. As the breeze begins to cool you a bit too much and Aemond scoops you up and brings you back inside.
“This is how I would prefer to take you around the Keep.” he whispers before pressing his lips to yours. “Now let me go get your sleep dress so I can give you your kisses.” he sets you on the bed, letting his lips linger on yours longer than necessary.
“Or might you just stay here for a little while?” you mumble against his lips. “Please?” you hold him closer and sigh when he pushes his tongue into your mouth. You try to pull him onto the bed with you and he starts to chuckle.
“This is more than just kisses.” he kisses down to your neck.
“Please.” you whisper. “Aemond please,” you whine.
“Let’s get you ready for bed.” he smiles as you shudder when he licks up your neck. “I can tell you’re going to fall asleep soon.” he lifts up and chuckles as you try to pull him back.
You watch him with a pout as he walks over to your wardrobe and pulls out a night dress for you. He stops to check on Aelor before walking back over to you on the bed. He bites his lip looking and you lidded eyes as you fight to stay awake. He helps you undress and brings your wandering hands to his mouth to place kisses against each finger.
“Go to bed and I’ll kiss you as much as you want when you wake up.” he pulls the covers up to your chin.
“I’ll stay awake.” you whine.
“Your eyes are shutting before me.” he smiles.
“No.” you shake your head and curl against him as he gets into bed.
“One more kiss.” he nods and you reach up and bring his lips to yours.
“One more.” you mumble against him.
“Rest.” he hums and kisses your forehead.
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Over the past couple of weeks Aemond has slowly relaxed and gone back to a regular sleeping schedule. Aelor is happy and healthy, though this doesn’t stop Aemond from darting to his side when he makes a noise. He’s hesitant to think about the egg, let alone even look at it for too long. He wants it to hatch so badly but maybe that’s why it’s not.
Maybe since he didn’t have an egg his son's egg will never hatch. It could all be his fault. He could be the reason Aelor grows up like him. Picked on and-
“Aemond.” you grab onto his arm. “Staring at the egg isn’t going to make it hatch.” your words soft.
“Do you think it’s my fault it hasn’t hatched?” he continues to stare down at the colored egg.
“Not at all. You’ve been quite the doting mother hen to that egg.” he turns to you with a squinted eye. “I joke.” you cup his cheek. “I believe it’s up to the Gods if his egg will hatch. It will be no one’s ‘fault’ if it does not. You are doing everything right.” you look into his eye and nod.
“So I should keep doting upon the egg?” the corners of his mouth shift up.
“I had hoped you might dote upon me?” you tilt your head. “I would just like some kisses.” you nibble on your lip. “For now.” he chuckles.
“I could indulge you in a kiss or two.” he hums, leaning down and pressing his lips to yours.
The moment his lips touch yours it’s as if all of his worry and doubt drift away. He’s never felt more wanted than when you cling against him trying to be as close as possible. How quickly you open your mouth and invite him in eagerly. The small noises you make when he squeezes into your sides and- He’s pulling off of you and turning back to the crib.
“He probably just moved.” you whine trying to tug him back.
“It’s happening.” he shakes his head. “There’s a crack. It’s moving. What do we do? Do we take Aelor out? I need-“ he cuts himself off, not ready to say that name after the words ‘I need,’ and looks between you and Aelor. “I’ll be right back.” he’s thudding down the stairs, leaving you to look after him with wide eyes.
Aemond doesn’t care about the early hour. He just prays he’s sober enough to help. He doesn’t hesitate at the guard as he pushes himself into his brother's chambers. He walks over to his bed and shakes his shoulder. Aegon pushes his hand away and Aemond yanks him harder.
“Get up.” Aemond hisses. “If you want to be a family, get up. The egg is hatching and I don’t know what to do.” the words taste foreign on his tongue and he watches Aegon's eyes snap open.
“Alright.” Aegon nods. “Let’s go.” he rises from the bed and so do Aemonds eyebrows.
“Put something on. My wife and child are there.” he strides over to Aegon's wardrobe. “Quickly.” he snaps, tossing trousers and a tunic. He pulls Aegon out of his chambers and down the hall once he’s clothed.
“My Gods, slow down.” Aegon groans. “And get me some water.” he looks up at the stairs to your chambers with tired eyes before he starts his climb.
“You will have nothing if you don’t help.” you hear Aemonds curt tone as he and Aegon make it to the landing. “Did anything happen?” Aemond is back at your side. “Do we take him out of the crib?” he turns back to Aegon.
“First we relax and tell me where the water is.” Aegon looks around.
“No.” Aemond shakes his head. “Come check on the egg and my son first.” he glares at Aegon.
“Aemond, it's just water.” you whisper, squeezing his hand. “Aelor is fine.” you nod up at him.
“Alright.” Aegon groans and walks over to the crib. “What a handsome boy. You did well, brother.” he grins across the crib at Aemond.
“What of the egg?” Aemond presses looking down at Aelor and the egg.
“It’s hatching.” Aegon nods. “Shouldn’t be long now.”
“Should we leave him with the egg?” Aemond looks over to him.
“Yes.” he nods. “Was that enough to merit me a cup of water?” Aegon blinks at Aemond expectantly.
“I suppose.” Aemond nods his head to the table holding the water pitcher and Aegon is next to it shortly after. “So what happens now?” he brings his attention back to Aelor and the cracking egg.
“You see when an egg cracks, brother,” Aegon walks over to him. “Something usually comes out.” Aemond flares his nostrils at Aegon's tone.
“I’m aware.” he says through his teeth. You hold on to his arm tighter hoping it’ll offer him some comfort. “Should we call for the keepers?” his tone a fraction smoother.
“I figured you already called for them.” Aegon raises his brow, sipping on the water. “So you came to me first?” he smiles. “Do not look at me like that. I’ll go call for them.” he waves Aemond off and walks back down the stairs.
Aemond’s mind is racing as he keeps his eye on the crib. He refuses to believe an actual dragon is hatching mere feet from him. His little son's very own dragon. You look up at Aemond and see his slightly flushed cheeks and reach up to cup his face and slowly turn him towards you.
“What’s wrong?” you take in his glossy eye.
“I’m just so happy for our son. For Aelor. He gets his own dragon. His very own.” his voice barely audible. “There’s soon to be too many people here for me to be this emotional.” he shakes his head and you wipe under his eye.
“Might I have a hug?” you whisper and Aemond grabs your hand from his face and pulls you against him. “I would still like to have my other kisses later.” you whisper and you feel his small chuckle in his chest, thankful for your distracting words.
“I could provide those for you.” he whispers and starts to pull back.
“The keepers will be here shortly.” Aegon announces as he makes it to the stop of the stairs once more. “Might you both pick different chambers? I already tire of these stairs.” Aegon groans, going to refill his cup of water once more.
“All the more to keep them. If they’ll deter you from barging in then I think they’re perfect.” you look up at Aemond as if you’re telling him to be nice.
“Maybe you’ll change your mind when you have more children.” Aegon waves him off. “The offer is always there.” his words are followed by a quick knock and the voice of the keepers coming up the stairs.
“Congratulations, my Prince.” the keeper looks to Aemond before walking over to the crib. “A healthy boy. No wonder his egg is hatching already.” the man muses.
“Should we have taken him out of the crib? Is there something more I should be doing? Would you like some water?” Aemond rapid fires questions at the keeper.
“He is perfectly fine in the crib. There is nothing for us to do besides wait. Though looking at the egg.. Ten minutes maybe.. Maybe more..” the man shrugs and Aemond nods before turning back to you.
“What did he say?” you look up at him. “I also think you sound so very elegant when you speak in that tongue.” you whisper and watch a small flush spread across his cheeks.
“The egg will hatch soon. We just have to wait now.” he turns his attention back down to Aelor and watches as you reach in and smooth his hair.
“Does the dragon stay here with us?” you look up at him. “Am I now raising our boy and his dragon?” your mind races on how you would even go about doing that.
“Not necessarily.” Aegon comes to Aemonds side. “Of course it’s so tiny now so it’ll spend more time with Aelor here to help strengthen their bond. When it grows and my Gods do they grow fast, it’ll be housed in the pits that you can visit.. If Aemond releases you from these chambers.” he lets out a small giggle.
“Aegon.” Aemond warns.
“Relax brother,.” Aegon sighs. “The keepers will tell you everything.” he looks up at him.
The three of you watch the egg slowly crack more and you hear Aemond’s inhale as Aelor slowly wakes. His eye widens when Aegon's hand enters the crib and pinches his little cheeks. Aelor lets out a small coo and turns his head towards the egg. You watch with wide eyes as he grabs onto the crack and you feel Aemond stiffen. Aegon grabs onto Aemonds arm and whispers lowly.
“Let him. He’s safe. There are plenty of people here who know what they’re doing.” Aemond looks down at Aegon and where his hand is placed on his arm.
“And you’re one of the people who know what you’re doing?” Aemond scoffs.
“You did come get me first.” he chuckles.
As Aemond goes to retort there's a more prominent cracking sound. The keepers slowly walk over and soon the crib is surrounded by watching eyes. You grab onto Aemonds arm and lean closer into his side. A short shriek is heard followed by another crack. You watch as Aelor grabs at the egg and pulls a piece of its shell off. You gasp when you see an eye before it disappears once more.
“Are you nervous?” Aegon whispers.
“Be quiet.” Aemond hisses.
“So you are.” Aemond turns his head and Aegon bites his lips to stifle his laughter. “I’ll be quiet. Don’t kick me out.” he nods back to the egg.
You and Aemond inhale at the same time when Aelor pushes his little hand into the growing hole. When he pulls it out you see a small tail wrapped around his wrist before it slips back into the egg. You watch as Aelor pushes his hand into the egg once more, slowly scooting towards it. He pulls another piece of the egg off and your eyes widen as the dragon is now blinking up at everyone. Aelor grabs the dragon and brings it to his side.
“He has a dragon.” Aemond whispers.
“He does.” Aegon grins.
“His very own.” you look up at Aemond and squeeze his arm, knowing how emotional this is for him.
“What are you doing?” Aemond is stepping forward when the keeper grabs for the dragon.
“We must examine him.” the man nods and scoops the dragon out of the crib.
“Will you bathe him as well?” Aemond looks at the mess starting to spread across Aelor’s linens.
“Of course.” the man nods and turns to the other keepers before walking to the bathing chambers.
“They’re cleaning the dragon so we can change Aelor’s sheets.” he turns to you. “Let’s go find him a fresh set.” he holds onto your arm as if it’s his lifeline.
“Then I suppose it’s just me and you left.” Aegon chuckles and scoops Aelor out of the crib.
Aemond glances at Aegon and Aelor before deciding Aegon probably knows what he’s doing in that sense too. He shakes his head, not quite ready to accept all of Aegon’s help. Aemond helps you pick out a clean pair of sheets and walks back over to the crib to strip it. You grab a change of clothing for Aelor and hand it to Aegon who smiles up at you from the chaise.
The next couple minutes in your chambers consists of everyone cleaning and preparing to bring Aelor and his dragon back together. Aegon stands once he has Aelor changed and brings him over to the crib. Aemond takes Aelor from his hands and nods once at Aegon who is well aware that is the only thanks he’ll receive. The keepers come back over and place the small dragon in the crib and nod at Aemond to do the same with Aelor.
“How is the dragon?” Aemond looks across to the keeper.
“He is well.” Aemond smiles. “We will leave you. Someone will return to care for the dragon and remain down the hall to offer the three of you reprieve until he is no longer fit for the Keep. They will help feed him and help instruct you on anything you should need. Your brother also knows a great deal and could offer you his wisdom.” Aemond chokes back a laugh at Aegons ‘wisdom’ and wonders if he’s ever seen it.
“Thank you.” Aemond nods at the man.
The keeper nods at you and Aegon as well before taking one last look in the crib with a smile spread across his face. The keepers wave before they leave the three of you to look down at the crib. Aegon looks between Aemond and you and smiles before walking over to the table holding the water once more.
“I will leave you three. I’ll have them house the keeper close by and I’ll have your guard tell you where. Should you both need anything else don’t hesitate to ask. All I ask is a nicer wake up and maybe some water before I’m dragged out of my chambers.” he raises his cup of water before starting towards the stairs.
“Wait,” Aemond calls out. “Thank you,” he nods when Aegon turns. “Brother.” Aemond groans at the smile that spreads across Aegon's face.
“Would you like a hug baby brother?” Aemond scoffs.
“No. Leave us.” Aemond waves him off.
“One day.” Aegon calls over his shoulder as he starts down the stairs.
You watch as Aemond stares down into Aelors crib with a furrowed brow. He inhales when your hand enters the crib to brush back Aelors hair. You then bring your delicate touch to the dragon's head and he slowly blinks his eyes open. He lets out a small purr before curling back up with your son.
“I know nothing of raising a dragon.” you turn and whisper up at Aemond.
“You know some from our readings.” he hums.
“Mm, shall I start to work towards becoming a dragon keeper?” you purse your lips.
“My wife, you’re perfect at everything so if that is what your heart desires then I have the utmost faith in you.” he pulls you against him. “But the keeper will remain down the hall and if it’s too much we can always just bring the dragon to Aegon and he’ll deal with it.” he brushes your hair back.
“Speaking of Aegon..” you look up at him with a raised brow. “I see that your relationship with him is improving.” you don’t want to pry but it warms your heart seeing them hopefully start to mend bridges.
“We’ll see.” Aemond starts to lead you back to the bed. “For now I would like to finish offering you the kisses you asked for while our son sleeps with his dragon.” he can’t help the grin on his face at that statement.
“Maybe soon we can have my handmaidens keep Aelor overnight.” he steps back and looks at you with a raised brow.
“Why?” he presses his lips to yours once.
“So I might enjoy my husband for the night.” you pull his lips back down to yours. “I miss you.” you whine against his lips.
“I rarely leave your side.” he chuckles, helping you lay back on the bed. “And when I do it’s under an hour.” he starts to crawl over you.
“Must I tell you what I miss?” you pout, pulling him down to you.
“Yes.” he whispers against your lips. “Tell me.” he kisses down to your neck enjoying your small breaths.
“You haven’t filled me in almost two months now.” you whine softly as he starts to suck on your neck.
“You’re still fragile.” he lets his teeth graze against your skin.
“I’m not.” you grab onto the back of his jerkin. “Please.” you whisper.
“Ask me again in a couple of weeks.” he kisses back up to your pursed lips.
“I won’t break.” you furrow your brows.
“No, but you deserve one. You just brought our child into this world.” he presses his lips to yours.
“Let me bring us another.” it’s taking all of his restraint not to take you at your breathy words.
“Two weeks.” he grabs your wandering hands and places them at your side. “It’ll just be like the lead up to our wedding.” he presses his lips all over your face. “Now let me go check on our son and his dragon before you take advantage of me in my emotional state.” he starts to detach from you.
He chuckles at your soft string of curses as you try to pull him back to you. You rise from the bed and smooth your skirts before returning to his side once more. Your son is curled up with his dragon and looks like a perfect little prince.
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
You’ve been trying to get Aemonds attention for the past two weeks now but he has resisted all of your advances. The amount of sheer slips you’ve had your handmaidens bring in makes it seem like you’re running a pleasure house. You’ve even gone so far as to sleep naked and he simply covers you with the covers and curls into your side.
Tonight officially marks the two week mark he set. Gods know why he’s making you wait, you’re ready to combust at the thought of him. Aelor is with your handmaidens for the night and his dragon is with the keepers. Your chambers are clean and there are candles spread throughout offering a warm light. You pace around looking for something to do until you hear the door open. You sprint over to your chaise and spread the sheer silk around your body.
“Mm, what is the occasion?” Aemond is fully aware that it is exactly two weeks since he told you to wait.
“Aemond,” you whine. “I’m begging at this point.” you go to get on your knees.
“No, no.” he shakes his head with a smile. “That’s my spot.” he sinks to his knees before you. “I have also been counting down the days, my insatiable wife.” he presses his lips up one of your calves. “Aelor is with your handmaidens for the entire night?” he looks up at you with a dark eye.
“Yes.” you nod quickly.
“Mm,” he continues to kiss up to your thigh, smiling at how you tremble. “And what is it that you want to do tonight?” he looks up at your already heaving chest.
“Aemond please,” you spread your legs before him, not caring anymore. “Please,” you groan as he starts to kiss your other calf, enjoying your breathy begging.
He kisses up to your thigh once more and pulls back softly chuckling at your whine. You look down at him with a soft pout until you feel him starting to push your slip up further. He can see you center glistening in the candle light and looks back up to your pleading eyes. He looks across your body and nods knowing you won’t be getting any type of sleep tonight.
“You are so very beautiful.” you let out a small whimper at his words. Your nails dig into the plush chaise as he licks up your center. He groans at your sweetness and grabs onto your hips to pull you closer. “Please let me know if it’s too much or if it doesn’t feel right.” he looks up at you.
“Please just-“ you let out a soft cry as he buries his head between your thighs once more. “Yes,” you gasp as his tongue swirls around your bud.
He rubs circles into your hips as he continues to lap at you listening to your sounds. You slowly roll your hips against his face and he quickens his movements pulling a gasp from you. He groans as he moves his tongue down to your core and finds your pooling wetness. He moves back up to your bud and encases it and sees your stomach flex.
“Aemond.” you whine, grabbing onto one of his arms. “I’m- I, please,” soft pleas continue to fall from your mouth as he moves his tongue faster. With another cry of his name you fall apart on his face. “Oh,” you jolt as he starts to move his tongue even faster.
Aemond can’t get enough of your sounds, it’s been far too long. Gods and your taste and the way you’re gripping onto his arm is spurring him on even more. He moves his other arm and circles one of his fingers around your entrance before slowly dipping it inside. Your broken whimpers are all he needs to hear before he starts pumping into you.
He looks up at you and sees that your slip has shifted and he groans looking at your breasts. Your eyes are squeezed shut, focusing on the pleasure he’s offering you. When he pushes another finger into you, your pleasure begins to build rapidly. You start arching off the chaise when he pushes his fingers into you faster. He smiles as he laps at you and he hears your wetness coating his fingers.
“Aem, I’m, please yes.” you squeak and pulse around his fingers.
“Was that good?” he slowly slips his fingers out and sits back, slipping them into his mouth. “You taste very good.” you whimper at his words.
“Take off your clothes. I need you.” you reach for him but he’s already grabbed onto the hem of your slip and is pulling it over your head.
“Are these still sensitive?” he whispers as he brushes his fingers against your nipples. Your small whimpers tell him everything he needs to know. He rolls the peaks between his fingers and watches you squeeze your legs shut.
“Aemond please,” you grip his wrists.
He chuckles and wraps his arms around you and lifts you to carry you to the bed. You pull at his clothes desperately and whine when he lays you back on the bed. You go to stand but stop when you find him removing his layers. At each reveal of his skin you spread your legs wider. Once he’s bare he crawls into bed with you and presses his lips to yours. You wrap your arms around him and pull him as close as you can.
“Fill me.” you plead into his mouth. “Please,” you wrap your legs around his waist. “Fill me, I need it.” Aemond chuckles but lines up at your entrance nonetheless.
He slowly pushes in and watches your face relax as small moans pour from your mouth. He presses his forehead against yours as he gets lost in your warmth and feel. When he settles within you he brings his lips to yours and slowly starts to rock his hips. You’re squeezing around him tightly and he’s trying to focus on kissing you to truly enjoy the feeling.
“Move.” you jerk your hips. “Please.” your breath catches as he snaps his hips.
“Hush.” he presses his lips to yours once more. “Let me just relish in the feel of you, my perfect wife.” he murmurs and kisses down to your neck. “I probably don’t even have to move to make you come undone.” he smirks against your skin as he brings his thumb down to your bud.
“Yes,” you dig your nails into his back. He nibbles at your neck as he continues to swirl his thumb around your aching bud. “Please,” you hold him tighter.
“I can feel how close you are.” he whispers into your neck, starting to roll his hips into yours. “Come for me and I’ll start moving.” he stills his hips once more and you let out a strained whimper. Your body is humming with pleasure as you moan out his name repeatedly.
“Aemond I’m-“ you gasp as your pleasure slams through you.
“Just like that.” Aemond lifts his head up and starts to pump into you. “You’re so perfect.” he presses his lips to yours. “Already wanting to be swollen with our child again.” his pace quickens at his words.
“Yes.” you pant trying to nod your head. “Please let me.” you whine feeling your legs start to tremble from pleasure.
“I’ll keep you filled with children as long as you please.” after every snap of his hips he rolls them into you after.
“Thank you.” the two words slightly pleasure slurred as he continues with his pace. “Tha- mm-
“Fuck,” he groans as you pulse around him causing his pleasure to slam through him.
You sigh with a smile as you feel his warmth spread throughout you. He presses his lips to yours as you both slowly rock against each other not quite ready to separate. You both stay sealed together until you both pull back with swollen lips, softly panting. He pulls out of you and watches a small frown form on your face.
“We’re not done.” he kisses your lips. “I just need some water.” he chuckles before getting out of bed. “Would you like anything?” he glances over his shoulder watching you still spread out in the bed.
“To be filled again.” he tilts his head back and laughs at your words.
“In a moment.” he hums and slows his stride enjoying your whining filling your chambers.
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masterlist ⏾ wips ⏾ taglist
sorry this took me so long sometimes i get stuck on scenes and forget i can skip around the chapter and finish other scenes 🫠
im prob going to continue my sibling agenda and next chap is going to be a time skip of prob like 3yrs UGH i just want these babies up and talking !!! dad aemond is going to send me to my grave so be patient w me plss
also feeling emo so i love u all who love this story with me and if you have any cute little family and/or dad scenes you want me to try and bring to light lmk and ill sneak it in 👉🏻👈🏻 ok ily bye
i see u as u are taglist: @readerselegance @sinistersnakey @thebirdandthebee
@ka1afbr @ninihrtss @daintylittlesunflower @primroseluna @alexxavicry @misspendragonsworld @papichulo120627 @ashovertheriver @gabriella-aesthetic @moonymoo1 @faenyra @uwuuness @lizzylovebooks280501 @nostalgiagoth03 @multilover19 @summer-and-sunflowers @eternalwinters @rere10 @sxlsvv @sarahrosw36q @tricksterreaper @somethingsaladsomething @naty-sunshine
#hey so ill never be chill about this series and im not sorry abt that!!!!#dad aemond has me in a choke hold rn#aemond targaryen#prince aemond#aemond#prince aemond targaryen#hotd aemond#aemond x reader#aemond smut#aemond targaryen fanfiction#hotd fanfic#hotd smut
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*trigger warning: mental health, depression, anxiety, dark thoughts*
so as i lay here at night before i try to go to sleep, my heart is heavy. i haven’t been okay for quite some time. i try to mask it very well, but a lot of the times you can sense it within me, or read it all over my face.
i’m not okay. i don’t know what to do about it anymore. it’s not like i don’t have a therapist, i do, and for awhile it was working wonders. but now? things in my life have gotten harder, more intense, stressful, impossible to figure out. everything is catching up to me and i feel like im drowning. i can’t swim and i cant breathe and im going further and further into the deep end.
now i know that i should be grateful for the things i have, and i am. but is it so wrong of me to wish life was better? to wish i was better? i want to be. i know this isn’t like me. it’s gotten to the point where some days i don’t wanna eat, or drink or even move out of bed. some days i think to myself: would everyone just be okay without me? would it be better for them if i just disappeared and never returned? would that make it better? what if i just vanished off the face of the earth with no return?
the reason i’m saying all of this is because this platform is a place where i feel like i can vent without anyone judging me, even if no one is reading this right now. i don’t have many people to talk to, to turn to. im thankful for the ones i do have, but i feel like ive been so miserable lately and not great company to be around and that hurts me to my core. i try so hard to be a nice person, a great person to be around, but my mental state makes me think that i don’t deserve anything, and that i’m no good.
i just want to be okay again. i want to make everyone around me smile and laugh and feel good. i want to breathe again, but right now i feel like i cant’t. so much is happening and i don’t know what to do anymore.
i just want to be okay. i wish i knew what to do because i feel lost, and im not sure how to find my way out.
if you’re still reading this, thank you, and i love you. thank you for any love you’ve given me on all of my works. writing is my outlet, but i feel like i’ve burnt myself out.
please remember that you are loved, cared for, needed, and appreciated. and you’re not alone.
thank you. i love you.
-nessa
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carefully attempted to draw (still sick); wanted to give Shargon another redesign, this is an older version of him but the basics should also go for his younger self (idk yet about his lung replacement design; arms are posed weird to make anatomy clearer)
(wip, oc art, Shargon, he/they)
#ganondoodles#art#oc#oc art#wip#character design#im really liking this one ngl#posted this on twitter but didnt here bc its just a wip but .. idk how far i will get with this lol#i know barely anyone is interested in oc art#especially when its not my usual big buff type i love so much#everything needs a lil variety tho!#and this build just fits shargon more than the typical#if anyone can make sense of it-#the extra arms he gets (red ones) are bc he gains another heart from Eadrya so he has two hearts and two elements now thus changed#(dw Eadrya is fine .... it makes sense in lore but its alot to explain and i dont think anyone would care anyway)#not trying to be dismissive- just realistic to save myself the time writing it and disappointment when no one reads it :U#i need to put more effort into oc art if i want anyone to care#at least i know Eadrya has always at least one fan (thank you calamity <3)
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The Housecat Philosophy - Ep 37
Ep 00 || < Prev || Next >
Read the next four episodes on Patreon || support me on ko-fi~✨
#the housecat philosophy#artists on tumblr#original comic#webcomic#original art#my sketches#ah i love writing sal and lu in the same place#can't wait to get deeper into them they have probably the most ridiculous relationship i've ever made up#anyway as a psa#i was actually hoping to post this one with an announcement that the comic was finally on webtoon but!!#the process of prepping it for the site is turning out to be surprisingly long ????#apparently my meant to be read top to bottom comic is too meant to be read top to bottom for the read top to bottom site#i've drawn panels that were nearly too long for the max length allowed by the site hahaha........#wow cropping strip 38 is gonna be a nightmare#ANYWAY just to let you all know im working on it#who would have thought letting 37 strips pile up would mean having 37x the work to do not me that's for sure#i absolutely did not call this upon myself in no way whatsoever
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@cokoweee
Ya’ll ever have a dream so lifelike it feels aggressively real until one thing goes a little too wrong and then you start to realize that maybe you’re in a dream but it’s also too real to convince yourself it’s not real that you can’t wake yourself up?
TW: panic attack, I say gun, uhhh blood ig? Bishop says a kinda weird thing but that's just him bein him
can I say blood? last time I did it marked me as mature...
-
Her heart thumped against her chest, lactic acid building in her legs as she ran. She tapped furiously at her phone, fingers slipping over the screen as she tried to deploy Sheldon.
Donnie says “no no no” chimed a pixilated picture of Othello, his finger waving back and forth.
“What the-” She slammed against a wall, her shoulder crunching against the brick.
His stupid programming on the poor thing to keep Sheldon at his house. Maybe she could override it?
No, not enough time. She was just going to have to run and hope for the best.
Her shoulder screamed in protest as she climbed the ladder in the alley. Scrambling over the side of the building to catch her breath, she tapped at the screen again.
There had to be something she could do to foil his programming. She wiped at her nose, the cold still not quite gone even after days of bed rest. Bullets flew over the edge of the building, seemingly locking on to her body heat. Throwing herself at the ledge at the last second to force the bullets to crash into the wall she coughed violently, phlegm coating her throat.
Stupid sickness.
Stupid Othello leaving her with the stupid rabbit farmer.
She pushed herself off the ground, arms struggling under the weight of herself. It was as if every muscle in her body was on fire, each fiber screaming at her to stop. She gulped raising her head over the ledge. Agent Bishop was standing on the adjacent rooftop, his face curled into a sneer, eyes unblinking despite the sun in his eyes.
He waved at her, fingers waggling in the air as he pulled a small gun from his pocket. Aiming it directly at her chest he grinned, his eyes flickering with something distinctly unhuman.
She stumbled backward, her feet skidding over the concrete as he seemed to lock onto her. Loose rock dug into her knees as she clambered over the rooftop.
Away.
All she needed to do was get away.
She placed a hand over her stomach, feeling the raised bump of the scar, as she moved.
This was…
This was wrong?
It didn’t happen this way.
No. She didn’t need to get away, she needed to get out.
The bullet ripped into her skin, tearing away at muscle, and shattering the bone in her rib.
She screamed, blood pouring from the gaping hole in her chest, as Bishop moved closer. He walked to her side, footsteps clanking against the concrete.
Clawing at the ground she dragged her body along the roof, rocks digging under her nails. Bishop laughed, his foot trampling her hand, digging it into the ground. She gasped, breathing shallowly as she fought to get loose.
He grabbed her hair, wrapping it between his fingers and tightening his grip as he pulled her from the floor.
“Oh, this is wonderful.” He smiled, voice dripping with venom. “Such a pretty little thing I caught this evening. I’ve been dying to chat with you.” He pulled her hair up, forcing her to rise. “I wonder if she’ll do any tricks?”
She spat in his face, her ears filled with an all-consuming ringing.
Away.
She needed to get away.
It didn’t matter how. She needed to get away.
He said something else, flaunting some sort of mechanism he had hidden in his shirt. She tried to focus on his words, but her breathing was too shallow, her limbs too shaky, the ringing too loud for her to hear a word.
She clamped a hand over her chest, a sorry attempt to staunch the flow of blood from the gaping hole in her body. Cursing softly she watched as the red seeped into a slithering pink fleshy mass.
She stifled a scream as the pink turned an orange maroon, her own blood fueling some sort of monster.
“Shhhhhhh.” Bishop whispered against her ear, “It’ll be done soon. Just one quick slash and you’ll be out of my hair for good.”
The mass jumped forward, faster than she could comprehend, her body spasming in pain as she scrambled back.
Was this the Krang she’d heard so much about after she’d left the jail? Weren’t they supposed to be mindless or something?
It lunged forward again, tentacles lashing toward her face. Bishop shook her in front of him, like a toy for a dog.
“Kendra?”
She screamed as he tightened his grip on her, shaking her around like a bag of flour. The world around her turned hazy, her vision blurring in and out.
She wasn’t going to go out without a fight.
Throwing her head back she jammed her skull into his chin, breaking the grip he had on her hair.
She clawed at the ground, a strange silky feeling coating her fingers. Pushing away the softness of what was sure to be Krang, she kicked at the mass as it wiggled unnaturally.
“KENDRA!” A familiar voice shouted at her, a gentle three-fingered nubby touch against her arm.
Her eyes flew open, arms flailing to the sides to swat at what was left of the Krang matter, as hands held her back. She gasped, her chest heaving as a sinking feeling hit her gut. Dread splashed over her head like a wave, drowning her, leaving nothing but fear.
Eyes widening she looked next to her for Tello, horrified as darkness encroached on her vision, leaving her staring through a pin hole. Nausea rolled through her stomach as she gasped for air, her chest shuddering to keep up with her breathing.
It hurt. It hurt so bad.
“Hey, hey, hey.” He whispered, hand placed against her back. “It’s ok you’re home. You’re with me.”
She jerked backward. He was loud. So so loud. Even with the ringing in her ears, he was too loud.
Breaths were punched from her lungs faster than she could finish taking them in. Tears streamed down her face as her eyes blew wide. Her chest tightened, lungs twisting as she shook.
She’s dying. She has to be dying. There’s no other explanation.
Dead in her room from a nightmare-induced heart attack,
Her eyes flickered back and forth over the room, not focusing on anything, just wildly scanning for danger she knew wasn’t there. Willing her arm to move, she let out a chocked warble.
The room seemed to melt around her. Things blurred together, a fuzzy abstract painting of almost-real-life. Sweat beaded on her forehead as she tightened her muscles.
Her whole body shook as she tried to take steadying breaths.
“Did you know softshell turtles only have half a plastron?”
She was in the middle of dying.
She most definitely did not need turtle facts right now.
“Technically a full one, but it’s covered by skin, rendering it effectively useless for plastron purposes.” He shrugs. “Same deal as the shell.”
She looked at him, confusion breaking through the panic.
“Makes us really flexible though. Wanna see?”
He got off the bed, walked to the middle of the room, and bent backward. He smiled upside down at her from the floor and smoothly brought himself back up.
“Pretty neat huh?” He waggled his eyebrows. “Bet no other turtle you meet could do that.”
Amusement rippled through her as she watched him demonstrate his stretches and various yoga poses.
“I’ve never met another turtle like you.” She breathed, some of the panic melting away.
“Precisely! No one can do it like me!” He said, pointing his finger at her triumphantly before his face softened. “ We starting to feel a bit better?”
She brought her thumb and pointer finger close together. A little
He nodded. “Am I good to come back up or do you need some space?”
She patted the bed next to her, inviting him closer. She waited until he was seated comfortably before slumping against his shoulder, exhausted.
He shifted slightly, reaching for his phone with one hand, the other wrapped around her. He let them sit for a moment, reminding her to breathe every few seconds before Sheldon zipped into the room.
He whispered something to Othello before zooming out of the room. She watched passively as it happened, her body still not quite connected to her soul.
Sheldon returned moments later, a bag of ice, a bottle of water, a cookie, and tub of lavender lotion in his little propeller arms.
Othello took them from him, patted his head, and shooed him away. Taking one of the ice cubes he flattened out her hand and placed it in her palm.
She jerked slightly at the sensation of cold in her hand, surprised when he placed another in her palm.
“Focus on the melting.” He said, voice low and gentle.
The ice filled the lines of her hand and dripped over the sides and down her arm. She shivered as the water pooled in her hand. Othello grabbed the cookie from the pile he had created and broke off half to give to her.
“Thanks?”
He watched her carefully. “What does it taste like?”
“A cookie?” She said through a mouthful, her hands still full of TV static.
“I need details.” He pressed.
She paused, taking a moment to consider the flavors in her mouth. “Vanilla, chocolate chips.” She took another bite. “ Like I left it in the oven a minute or two too long and overcooked them just slightly.”
She’d have to make another batch, this time keeping an eye on the time.
He pressed an uncapped water bottle into her hand. “Drink.”
She pressed the bottle to her lips, feeling the way the cold blossomed against her skin as she held it there. Quietly observing the way she could feel it go down her throat and into her stomach.
“Are we feeling more alive?”
She nodded, running her hand along her thigh to feel the fabric of her pajama pants as she pressed her head against his side.
“Good.” He murmured, sleep creeping into his voice. “You had a panic attack I’m pretty sure.”
“...Sorry it was for something stupid.”
“I get worked up over stupid stuff too.” He mumbled, eyes half closed.
“Your stuff isn’t stupid.” She countered.
“Then neither is yours.”
She stopped, lifting her head to look up at him.
He grabbed her hand, flexing the fingers for her. “You feel ok?”
“I don’t know.” She answered honestly.
He nodded and guided her to a lying position. “Tell me five of your favorite things.”
She paused, looking around the room. “Hmmmmm. You.”
“Thank you.”
“Mhm. Uhhh, lavender. The color purple. Satin jackets. Baking. Messing around in the lab. Oh, I guess that’s more than five.”
He tapped her shoulders rhythmically, “You can keep going if you need to.”
She took in a deep breath. “I think I’m ok now.”
“Positive?”
Nodding she pulled the blankets over herself. What she really needed was rest. She was so exhausted from the whole ordeal that the idea of doing anything else felt impossible.
He got off the bed again, searching beneath the bedframe for something before he pulled a large purple blanket from under the bed. She blinked in surprise as he placed it over her, a weight holding her down to the bed.
“I should’ve mentioned it was weighted.”
She pulled her hand out to give a quick thumbs up as he climbed back into bed. She shifted to hold out her arm for a hug. He smiled and pulled her close, wrapping his arm around her waist.
“You smell like you’ve been using my soap.” She grumbled against his plastron.
He shrugged. “ I like the way you smell.”
Rolling her eyes she tugged the blanket higher over her shoulders smiling as soft chirping filled the room, the sound he always made right as he fell asleep.
“Good night Tello.” She whispered.
His plastron vibrated as he churred back, gently running circles through her hair.
She was home. And she was safe.
~
squad don't write stuff at four AM I'm pretty sure this only makes sense to me at this point. Anyway I was listening to my pretty princess playlist while writing this 💁♀️
the reason why this was written is in the tags btw
#Me and my friend were hanging out and she got all excited when I told her I was minoring in creative writing#she asked for me to read me some of my stuff and I agreed LIKE AN IDOIT#well i open my docs and low and behold it's what I posted yesterday#mind you that doc is titled ugly sewer man and his pretty wife#i scroll before she can see the title but at this point I have to read this one#its too late for me to exit the doc without me being suspicious#I read it and she's all like “Well butter my backside and call me a biscuit I forgot you wrote but you do a pretty dang good job!”#I'm just sweating bullets coz I just read her my fanfic of Donatello the ninja turtle and Kendra the dragon chick#she'll never know and I'll never tell her that she was read kendratello fanfic with the names and some of the words replaced#its worth it to say that this isn't the first time that this has happened with her#last time it was the freaking really long one with Leo dying dead and Don also trying to die dead#i went home and cooked myself some pasta to recover because wtf was that#and I was so upset by the situation that instead of sleeping I wrote more kendratello fanfic?#pee pee poo poo#caca dodo even#FOUR AM BABY AND IM STILL HEREEEEEE#Ya'll also got some free stuff to use to help a hommie out if they ever start having a panic attack#tapping method will work on yourself as well if you start feeling freaked out or not in your body.#just cross your arms over your torso and put your left hand on your right shoulder and vice versa tapping your shoulders one at a time#im sleepin now#gn yall#Paige writes
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does me being a scientist make my sluttyness on here hotter?
#bunny rambles#i love science and writing that post was really nice and like I'm happy it's helping ppl unclench and stuff but also yk.#im so insecure about being intimidating or a know it all that I usually shoot myself down instead of commenting on things so im feeling#a little activated on the insecurity front and i wanna be silly about it cause I've been sitting in my anxiety for a minute#im glad that like. people are being really nice and some are affirming that their doctors have said what I said#makes me feel less nervous that im just saying completely garbage 😭🩷#(i know this is very unhealthy thinking I'm working on it actively in therapy I just. ahhhh. too much thoughts in my head and no energy for#a 1:1 conversation still so word vomits barely anyone will read it is 🫡 im gonna take a hit and go wash some dishes now bye bye if u read#this uhhhhhhhhh ily kisses 🩷 ahdkfkshdjf)#also “being a scientist” feels like such a fake phrase but also I've been out of college for a few years and have been working as a research#tech for 4 years and I'm working on a solo project (i cant wait to go back to work genuinely) and stuff so i guess it's true#its just so weeiiird calling myself one ahdjsksjdjdk
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...
#do you ever think about the way thinks die? i dont mean bodies. i mean the idea of things.#when a building was a place where people went and worked. somwtimes thousands of them. and then the people stop coming and the idea of the#the place gradually dies. and people start to forget. the writing on graves wear away until theyre just empty pillars#marking the location of someone that no one remembers. someone whose name will never be spoken again because all of their#impact has been washed away. how an object you poured your whole life into can suddenly become a scrap of technological trash.#how the bodies of a million plants and animals hundreds and millions of years old. compressed into soft smearing#sedimentary rock can be burned away to ash. obstructing the sky over point pleasant where 46 people died in a bridge collapse 10 days before#Christmas and people only remember the mothman. dying towns and dying building and dying ideas. i do this dumb thing all the time where i#declare the death of ideas. sometimes to myself. sometimes out loud. i dont thibk anyone knows im doing it. i just give them a 'so it goes'#bc i read slaughterhouse 5 in high school and couldnt shake the repeated decorations of death. i was going to read a book today. so it goes.#my mom was going to fly out and take care of me when i got my wisdome teeth out. so it goes. that place used to be a glass factory but the#y abandoned it 20 years ago. so it goes. life is a sequence of dying ideas. living by falling through a corpse. and its not that im in#dispair about it. its terrifying and sad that nothing lasts and change is the only constant. and i grieve for the dead things that will#never be known. the things that were born in the dark. were never seen and then died there. but there's something about the process of#living and dying that i find deeply compelling. to watching something spin into life and then sputter out to nothing. and that every other#thing to ever exist is on the same trajectory just at a different timescale. i dunno. theres something beautiful in that. and theres#something beautiful in thinking about all the dead and dying things. at least. i think there is...#unrelated
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early in the morning after dead'nt, orange has a question.
usually he'd still be asleep long past now, but he wanted to ask about... TDL.
without the others interrupting.
so, he goes to chosen's door.
immediately this plan starts to slip off the rails.
no one knows where dark is.
...........because the others may or may not have spent the entirety of last night searching for him in every nook and cranny except there and they said they'd tell him if they found him and no one woke him up yet so
that means, the only logical conclusion is: he's in chosen's room.
so how is orange gonna ask chosen his question????
well, usually, chosen lets him just walk in.
s0!
here goes nothin
he opens the utterly silent door.
green made it special for cho, because they didn't want anyone to ever hear it being opened.
as a special bonus, yellow was able to code the door in such a way that it would never need any maintenance related to sound: its hinges and latches would stay pristinely quiet, forever.
so chosen doesn't wake up when orange sneaks inside.
they wake up when orange takes one step in, spots bright red, and fails to stifle a gasp.
"oh shit!!" orange whispers.
chosen's eyes peek over the covers.
"I'm sorry! i didn't know- uh, i would've- if um- i can come back later-"
they stare at him. "what's wrong." chosen prefers clear and concise, especially early in the morning.
"you-" orange carefully picks his next words. "and him-"
they're in the same bed.
"yep." chosen nods.
orange stands there.
then he shrugs.
"um, sorry. on our shows, this is always a big point of conflict. we don't know why. so i just didn't want to- you know. assume otherwise."
"oh. thanks...?" chosen blinks sleepily. "yeah, it's okay."
"okay!"
"you wanted something?"
"yeah, so-"
orange cuts off again midsentence.
TDL is beginning to stir.
dark emits the highest little squeak-whine that orange has ever heard (even compared to red's baby rabbits), and raises a hand to tug chosen back down to the pillow.
chosen turns their entire face to him, trilling.
they both perform a little brushy-brushy head bonk thing.
then chosen maneuvers their body (under the covers) so it, presumably, mingles more tightly with dark's.
this is satisfactory - for now. dark grumbles about it and stuffs his head under chosen's chin.
orange stands pixel-perfectly still by the door.
"you were saying?" chosen finally turns back to him.
"uh," orange stalls.
dark's eyes open.
he awakens with terrifying speed, untangling from chosen, hoisting up from the covers, and raising a warning fireball within milliseconds.
the room shifts into blazing color and stark shadows.
he shrieks,
"GET OUT!!!"
it seems dark does not, "okay" this situation.
orange drops, scrambles, and miraculously operates the door with enough precision to tumble out the other side unscathed.
silently, the door shuts itself behind him.
...
the fireball is put away.
...
"cho, why do you allow The Beast into your room?"
chosen snorts. "it was him who rebuilt you."
dark snarls. "are you SURE it wasn't some trick? you watched the whole time? i don't trust it."
"i trust him."
"why? how?? you do understand why i have reservations about it???"
"yes," chosen nods. "But I trust him."
They press their very cold head into dark's very warm head, and both of them sigh in relief.
"He brought me you."
dark huffs. "mm."
...
"and other things," chosen concedes. "you... weren't there."
"tell me."
...
outside, orange is still collapsed, upside down, against the wall, across from chosen's door, where he crashed earlier in his escape.
red has just found him while coming upstairs to check out the commotion.
"orange!? u okay?"
"yeap," orange strains. "all good."
"what happened?"
orange's hand flops on the floor towards chosen's door. "you were right. dark's in there."
red takes a second to digest this.
then his hands fly up to his mouth.
"what're they doing in there?????? did you see???"
"yes. i dunno."
"were they ? ? ?
fucking ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?"
orange squints at him.
through the door, two voices loudly interrupt,
"NO!"
the angrier voice adds,
"AND FUCK OFF!"
red squeaks and hurries back down the stairs.
orange sighs deeply.
this has been a terrible learning experience for all.
#--/ story#chodark#now hang on. stay with me. there is ZERO romance in this story. none.#but there are totally references to it in the context of explaining how zero the romance is in this story- it's all a joke about 0 romance#that's the point lmao#but there is? something?? i do not have words for this. p lease explain to me if you know#and there's fluff. so \o/ take that how you will#alan becker#animator vs animation#ava orange#ava the chosen one#ava the dark lord#i just realized this type of posting first about the ending before any of the beginning is what Handplates did.......#......... heh. go read that if you haven't it's really good storytelling#anyhow WHAT IS HAPPENING I NEVER WRITE THIS MUCH THIS FAST AAAAWAWAA#im enjoying myself but also trying not to overextend <o> y'know?? y'know#that's it for now 🎉🎊💥💕✨👋💖💫💤🕳️🦞#edit: the wise one has spoken. we shall call this pairing...#qpr#queer platonic relationship#\o/🎊 congratulations to the happy mutual administrative associates#executable!au#ava au
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I think someone should study the fact that all of the moral issues people have with coleen hoover are just the modern day version of "this erotic literature will corrupt our pure women!"
#she literally. she literally writes modern day bodice ripper romances. y'all grandmas#consumed that shit as if tomorrow wouldnt come#hell i myself think that her writing sucks but. im not gonna raise a rabble or go on a moral crusade with 'oh i am so worried for the young#girls who might read this and think abuse is ok!' which is just. so incredibly stupid#and is one of the instances where people will literally blame anything but the abuser themselves in a DV situation#(and like doesnt account on how girls can and do know how to differentiate fiction from reality#me reading smutty bully harry stiles fics at twelve with dubious consent didnt lead to my grooming#because i *knew* that an asshole beating you up at school and then saying no i love u now was wrong and abusers#are way more insidious than that#there are also people going 'oh but her being widespread is the reason why media literacy is so low' baby it doesnt work like that#the booktoker saying she cant read stories that are too complicated wouldntve been miracolously a good reader if coho didnt exist#she wouldve just read. harry potter or other YAs. media literacy and reading comprehension are tools that can be sharpened#but aren't really *gainable* yknow unless they are put into you really young thru school and we all know school doesnt do that#also comment i found funny was someone going 'teens who read coho will grow up saying that wuthering heights is a love story'#<-da hell is that thang. whuhei is 100% a love story all the players being assholes doesnt mean it isnt a romance
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why do i love the conflict more than anything else . the misery . the incompatibility that spreads like oil slick . wanting so desperately for resolution that never comes . hmmm
#its the allure of like . mismatch btwn right person / wrong time . maybe in personal development and such#or wrong person / right time and trying 2 make it work but the circumstances are set 2 separate you#i think the guilt ford harbors over his relationship w fidds is good and i think hes had a lot of reflection . 30 yrs at least#but i dont rly care for like a . HELPP SRY IM LIKE talking to myself#i dont rly care ‘if’ they got back tgether in the end#fanon wise or whagever obviouslyy . no avrually emma-may kicking fidds out over the xmas thing its over HELPPPP#i feel like i always hve to clarify bc then theres that one guy whos like ‘smth smth you cant read . ooc loser .’idgaf . not gaffing today#i think mcguckets decision to forgive him is rly sweet And i do like the recognition of .. the whole incident being a misstep on both their#parts ykwim ? like ford was an ass for sureee but also mcgucket + memory gun was his own autonomous detriment#but#no i cant read the other tags i was writing i forgot where i was at#anyways im so obsessed w like . this being such an imperfect event with imperfect equals#ford theory and fidds the mechanics . which brw im also obsessed w how That is revered in canon .#but yeah like imperfect event imperfect people who shared an incredible connecfion in my freaking mind#that was ultimately squandered to fords pride and fidds reticence#ugh like i love the rise and fall i love the strenght of their connection generally corroding over time#its just such a cool motivator for both themselves and like its a history they share together and post weirdmageddon get to finally think a#knowing now what they didnt have the tools to recognize then#idk.^__^ they r so crazy to me . playing w them like dolls in my head#fiddleford mcgucket#stanford pines#gravity falls#every time i think ab this wrt every challeneged dynamic i think ab mars in the discord#talking ab x and y charas epic divorce arc#and im not even saying this to discredit Good relationships in media#bc those have a wealth of fun and interesting concepts or dynamics to dive into#its just something ab like . poetry of anger bro . and how love and hate can feel so similar and be borne from the same place#how one can transform into the other and back again due to . idk whatevee the hell theyve got going on^#prev post got me wishing we had more meat to the fallout#or that it was extended in content or scope . i want 2 see how they dealt with losing the other and then
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the doctor isnt neurodivergent or autistic or adhd or nonbinary or genderqueer or asexual. what the doctor is, is Not From Here
#which necessarily of course says something abt their (non)whiteness#(i had all these words in quotation marks first so mentally add those to whiteness too)#but we've them be black for all of 1.5 episode now so#lets see how that develops you know#also i dont think i understand the politics of that part well enough to say much abt it#not that i probably understand the politics of these parts better but#im annoyed enough abt this Thing happening these years. in these 20s i guess. the 'representation' thing#to complain abt it anyway#the dsm isnt real and it isnt gonna fuck you buddy#maybe i'll read some books and then one day i'll write an essay driven by spite and pettiness#i wonder if i can make the thesis statement about the tension between their status of main character#in a 60 year running family adventure show vs this therapy thing we're doing now#like. you cant do that. in terms of like. what story is and does. what a character is and does. it strains#in an interesting way. like im not saying they Shouldnt have done it. im just observing. that you cant do that really. i think#or maybe you can! but i'll find that out#i also dont know shit abt narratology or whatever so. need to read books first. sigh#always have to pause my thoughts to read myself in first its so annoying. esp bc i rarely really do#bc then new thoughts new things to do you cant do EVERYTHING. you can do almost nothing. bane of my existence really#but like you might even be able to say smth interesting here about whether you can call them traumatised at all#remember that article i saw around on tumblr a few years ago i think that was abt like. some scholar in the middle east maybe#saying that ptsd is a western thing bc it necessitates a Post#all of this is western. psychiatry is western. its all stories. how you conceptualise trauma is a story#whos Other is story#where youre from is a story what you stand for is a story who you are is a story#ah. checked the article. dr samah jabr. palestinian. i'll start with her book maybe
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.
See the thing is. I know I'm good at writing. Like I have my weak areas or things I need to improve in, but it's not a skill I otherwise spend a lot of time feeling insecure about because a) if I don't believe in my writing literally who will b) if I want to publish my writing I ought to at least feel a resting level of good about it because editors and agents likely will not be cradling my face like a prize cat and telling me how talented I am while asking for their edits c) I've always had an audience for my writing even at its worst– I started sharing my original works online when I was around 16 & that really helped sell to me the idea of 'there will always be someone out there who likes what you do' d) untalented men never think this hard about the quality of their works and they always end up published anyway and e) I don't have many other thoroughly developed skills so why not have one I feel good about. Having said this. Awkward feeling to realize you're one of the authorial weak links in your postgraduate creative writing degree's social circle
#part of the issue is definitely also like. i am good at what i do! its just that im the only one doing it#40 people in my fuckass degree and im the only one who writes fantasy fiction. we had one more girl but she did romance & dropped out#(to be an agent) (this isnt a sad story)#but yeah no im mostly surrounded by very talented poets and screenwriters. which makes my works seem a little. frivolous. in comparison#and my friends especially are so fucking talented it makes me ill. and they engage politely with me about my writing but its also#superficial and i cant blame them because its simply not what they write/what theyre interested in! i feel the same about poetry#but my friend actually seemed surprised a while ago when i mentioned a thing id been writing and i joked that it looked like she was#surprised i could have good ideas and she didnt answer. and like. man.#i am a good writer! i fucking know im a good writer but im a good FANTASY writer and these people are. different writers and theyre good an#im floundering in this environment next to them and theres something not as like.. artistic in what i do its so fucking embarrassing#and they also display just such a lack of curiosity as to others' writing like.. they wont check the moodle forum to read what the others i#our module have uploaded for each assignment?? like arent you even just CURIOUS? but now im also just wondering if theyre like 🤞 this#with each other in a way that excludes me and my stupid flop ass fiction. i dont know. its just so silly. everyone always talks about#finding community in writing groups & degrees & such and that is exactly the last and most isolating place ive ever been insofar as my#writing goes. like at least way back in high school no one cared in general. here people do care. just not about what i can bring to the#table. although again i really dont know if this is a larger scale lack of curiosity/involvement in others works so i digress.#notnow#tbd#sorry this is a very priveleged complaint to have i AM deeply enjoying my degree and ik im so lucky to get to go where i attend. i just#occasionally feel sad. and knowing i failed my last assignment (which WAS fiction) (one chance to prove myself! cute) isnt helping much#if the poetrypeople are better at me even in the thing im meant to be good at. baby we're about to enter the mental health meat grinder.#but we stay silly. i think i just need to find people online etc to talk to about writing again like i did at 17.#just full insanity paragraph analysis. that was fun. i enjoyed that.
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i desperately want to write something cathartic and fluffy and gentle but i don't think i can handle it flopping and it almost certainly will
#rox rambles#it would also involve having an idea#which i do not have#i just keep writing the same thing over and over again#and i KNOW the notes dont matter#and i appreciate every kind word i get#but it gets to me occasionally#no one is actually waiting for me to write anything#i could stop writing now and no one would care#99% of the time i love my writing just being me screaming into the void#but sometimes i just want the void to scream back ya know?#ugh maybe im just lonely and depressed#also i fucked up my back and gave myself blisters and i have a concert tomorrow night#um if you actually read all this have a cookie
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everyones more than welcome to send me asks about stuff* btw, i know i havent been that good in answering, but i think thats largely bc i always want to do too much, like .. drawing entire character design sheets and everything and then never having the energy or motivation for it so it sits around like all of my hundreds of wips i never finished bc i lost energy/motivation, waiting for it to come back .. which might never happen (and i still dont know how to handle compliments ,, i might never will tbh- if i havent answered a compliment its very very likely i dont know how to properly convey my gratitude- feeling like theres no amount of things i can do or say to 'pay back'? ... kinda weird if you think about it .. but i am weird so what do i know jsklfnhsdk, i promise you i treasure it)
im pretty sure not everyone that sends an ask expects a drawing or multiple and pages long text right? thats my skewed perspective isnt it?
*stuff being like .. about my ocs, about my zelda comic, about the totk rewrite project, suggestions, ideas, rants too, kind of anything though im less likely to respond to personal things (and in case theres anyone newer to tumblr, asks dont have to be literal questions, you can write in those what you want, i like them alot bc its a lil message without the chat type of commitment to it ... im even worse at keeping up responding in chats (not intentionally .. my short term memory sucks) o3o)
#ganondoodles talks#personal#i might ... have gotten some of my art spark back .... i think#i dont want to announce anything before knowing for sure#but i was able to fix the comic panel i kept getting frustrated on today so im countign that as a win#............... in case you are one of the at least 8 people who saw the oc post i wrote yesterday btw ... sorry my fear of being cringe wo#i deleted it earlier today T-T#i still feel like im making myself too vunerable talking about my ocs#like oh gods i cant write things like that .. scenes out of context that mean alot to me but are jsut werid to read for others#i fought the cringe fear for a long time but it still won#if you dont know- its nothing to worry about ... just got mad at myself for wasting an entire evening just daydreaming about ocs again-#and added a really sloppy summarized version of a scene i came up with for them that made me feel things but makes no sense-#-and has no weight written in tags like that so uuuuh thats gone now dfjkgndfjknjkd#i sometimes think i shouldnt be allowed to make posts past 10 pm but here i am writing one at .. FRICK ... 1am again#....going to bed now .. woops
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just going to be bitchy on main one last time before making myself go to bed
For real idk why the fuck I'm still bothering with my high effort location/details screenshot compilation posts when I can just make lower effort posts that get SIGNIFICANTLY more notes. Like why the fuck should I even bother to spend at least a couple hours curating screenshots for part 2 of Luis's lab details which will get a maximum of 50 notes when I could just spend like 20 minutes making a few gifs like this and get HUNDREDS of notes
#im not entitled to attention but no one is entitled to my gigantic hoard of very useful reference screenshots#i know theyre very useful bc i frequently reference them myself while writing#and the thing is i can continue to do that myself without posting any publicly :) but i thought other ppl would appreciate them too#and i know a handful of ppl do but overall idk man rn i don't feel appreciated enough to continue sinking my time into these#ill probably feel embarrassed abt breaking down publicly over smth so dumb tomorrow but that's tomorrow heather's problem#tonight heather's problem is feeling ignored by a fandom ive tried so hard to contribute and be helpful to#sorry to the ppl who do interact w and appreciate me are reading this im v thankful for yall and wouldve given up posting sooner without yal#it's still just very discouraging to see my efforts/honestly myselfvgo ignored in the fandom as a whole while other ppl get more notes#and interaction that i see on my dash all the time#idk i dont think that came out right but for rn i really need to just shut the fuck up
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