#and i know it’s all jokes and almost always has to do with discussing characters from stuff or whatever

[pearlpool]

:/

[youcantseeus-fan]

Book Haymitch and Movie Haymitch are two different characters

If the Haymitch in SOTR feels “off” to you and it has been some time since you’ve read the trilogy then I would suggest that you go back and read it. Particularly if you’ve got Woody Harrelson dancing around in your head.

I don’t see people discuss this very often, but book Haymitch and movie Haymitch are quite different. They’re both drunk assholes with knowledge of the Games, but that’s about all that movie Haymitch is whereas book Haymitch has so many more layers, so much more depth, and is so much closer to the boy that we see in SOTR.

The movies sand down his extremes. Book Haymitch can come off as much darker and even more violent (such as when he punches Peeta). But he can also be much more tender than movie Haymitch (such as when he kisses the top of Katniss’s head before her interview).

His level of despair and hopelessness is much higher in the books. It’s like he doesn’t know what to do because even though he has plenty of smart ideas, everything he tries just ends up getting people killed. And yet he has these two kids in front of him who keep wanting him to try. This doesn’t really come across to me in the movies.

His alcoholism is so much worse and is treated so much more seriously in the books. In the movies, it’s almost always used as a joke. It’s sometimes used as a joke in the books, but we can also see that this man has severe alcoholism to the point that he has difficulty functioning. When he meets Katniss and Peeta, he immediately vomits on the ground and Peeta has to go give him a bath. His withdrawals in Catching Fire are also striking.

Book Haymitch has hints of rebellion such as when he points into the camera when Katniss is reaped. These aren’t as present in movie Haymitch. I certainly think that movie Haymitch is pissed off about the Games, but he doesn’t have the same dark undercurrent of rebellion.

I also think that one of the biggest differences is that book Haymitch is so chaotic (which matches the impulsive boy from SOTR well). I can never predict what book Haymitch might do. With movie Haymitch I know pretty well what he’ll do because his actions are mostly limited to: a) acting drunk in a funny way, b) dispensing wise advice about the Hunger Games, c) being a sarcastic asshole, or d) flirting with Effie Trinket.

Book Haymitch might do any of these things except for the flirting with Effie Trinket one. But there are also so many other possibilities. He might give you amazing insight into the Games. He might vomit on the carpet. He might fall into a depressive state where he’s of no use to anyone. He might be the only person who can fix your propo for you. He might tell you that Peeta is the best boy ever. He might punch Peeta in the face. He might insult Katniss. He might give Katniss a tender hug. He’s very unpredictable in a way that doesn’t come across in the movies.

Because the Seam and merchant divide is almost absent from the movies, we don’t get much if any impression of Haymitch being Seam. This is one of the main ways that Katniss connects to him in the books and it’s a huge part of his character. He’s so very Appalachian. Gone from the movies.

Do the movies even have the reveal that Snow killed Haymitch’s family and his girl? I don’t remember it, but it’s been a long time since I watched Mockingjay. I know they don’t really show his Quarter Quell. And I remember that they completely ruined that scene of Finnick’s revelations by interspersing it with action movie bullshit.

None of this is meant to be a criticism of Woody Harrelson, by the way. He does very well with the part as it is written. But book Haymitch just has so much more depth and is so much closer to SOTR Haymitch. I do sort of wonder how they are going to handle the SOTR movie because I can picture movie-only fans just thinking “what the fuck?” But for me, SOTR Haymitch works so well as a younger version of the Haymitch we see in the Hunger Games books.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Im an ace simp unashamedly and i need to share this little detail of heartslabyul's birthday boy card that someone probably mentioned alr somewhere. In all the boys' groovy illustrations theres always someone else with them. Riddle has cater and trey, Trey has cater. Cater has ace and Deuce has someone in the corner (i cant tell who)

EXCEPT ACE???? BRO'S JUST STARING INTO THE CAMERA WITH THAT SILLY LITTLE BLUSH LIKE BRO YOU LOOKING AT ME???? WHAT ARE YOU TRYNNA TELL ME TWST????

cbjsvsjsjcks Where did all the Ace simps suddenly spawn from… I feel like I’ve been meeting a lot of them lately (not necessarily through this blog, but also in other discussion circles) 😂

Yes, the Birthday Boy series tends to generally showcase at least one other character in the Groovies. For Heartslabyul: Cater and Trey appear in Riddle’s, Trey appears in Cater’s, and I believe it’s Ace in Deuce’s.

That isn’t Trey because Trey wears gloves in his dorm uniform, and nor can it be Riddle because his dorm uniform looks entirely different than the standard one. That leaves us with Cater and Ace. By process of elimination and using context clues, it’s most likely Ace. Cater already appeared in two other Birthday Boy Groovies. Additionally, Deuce has a voice line where he says Ace gifted him a jack-in-the-box—and while the Groovy doesn’t depict that item, Deuce is reacting similarly shocked upon opening it. Ace has also explained (I think in a Halloween event or vignette??) that it is possible to pull off a simple trick of flashing lights and sounds using magic. He tends to use his skills for childish things like little pranks and sleights, and has the personality to be inclined towards those things too. All the circumstantial evidence points to Ace.

Anyway, I feel like Ace is one of those characters you commonly see getting shipped with Yuu because of how he is presented in official content (and especially the main story). Him and Malleus seem to be the Big Two on that regard. That’s what my observation has always been, at least.

It’s rare that TWST will put out these “looking directly at you” illustrations, and even when they do, it’s not always aimed at Yuu if you look at the context the vignettes provide. For example, the Jade Outdoor Wear Groovy has him looking back and offering a hand… but it’s not for Yuu, it’s for Cater; Floyd’s Beans Camo Groovy had him looking soft and cute… and that gaze is aimed at Epel while Floyd talks about how he wants to take on strong opponents. Ace’s Birthday Boy Groovy exists in defiance of that pattern!

I think it’s funny that his dynamic with Yuu can so easily feed into that trope of the BFF that’s crushing hard but is too afraid to fully commit, so he always frames advances/flirting/playful teasing as “just jokes” to test the waters. It almost feels like Ace was tailor-made for this 😂 It sets up a lot the potential for something as simple as a look seeming longing. I can definitely understand how someone might see that Groovy and think it’s romantic. I don’t think most people make that kind of expression while using the thumb to brush away crumbs and staring into the camera 💀 Bro would 100% catch you and then go, “I know, I know, I look so cool that you just can’t get enough of me. Well, today’s my special day so I’m feeling extra nice. Feel free to stare at me aaaaaall you like, Prefect.” And then maybe joke that you could have him all to yourself if you asked—

You Ace yumes out there must be thankful for this food www

[towriteloveontheirarms]

After Nightfall (dark!modern!Aemond Targaryen x Reader)

synopsis: Her low, raspy voice is light-hearted and though you know she is joking, you can´t shake the feeling of the hair at the nape of your neck standing up and the skin on your arms prickling.

“I´m fine.” You mutter rather dismissively. Taking a large gulp of the pretty, pink drink in front of you. (side Aegon II Targaryen x Reader)

warnings: non-con, confessions, angst, smut, semi public sex, mutual masturbation, oral (f receiving), p in v, afab reader

word count: 4k

taglist: @hopelesswritergall @urmomsgirlfriend1 @legitalicat

(If you want to be tagged for any specific character/series/fandom or in general on my fanfic or moodboards let me know in my asks, comments or DMs)

A/N: This one is a little darker so if you don´t feel in the right mindspace to read this right now there is no shame in klicking away and maybe come back another time. I love you all!

Dividers by @djarrex

“Okay, I´m gonna say something right now, yeah? But you can´t judge me for it. No matter how controversial it.” You say, barely holding back the nervous giggles as you look at Helaena with a look that made her promise.

“We listen and we don´t judge.” She holds up her palms defensively.

It makes you feel safe enough to burst out the confession. “I´m so desperate I might have gotten turned on by how Aegon looked at me earlier.”

The words almost jumble together by how fast they get pushed out of your lungs. Followed by a squeak and your hands coming up to hide your burning face at the sight of the immediate shock written onto your friend’s face.

“No! You can´t mean that. Seriously? Aegon?” She asks over a disbelieving laugh and bulging eyes. Her mouth gaping ever so slightly at the revelation.

“Yes, Aegon! And you said you wouldn´t judge…” You whine, barely able to hold back a chuckle of your own as you lower your hands to look at your friend again.

“I´m not judging. I´m just… asking.” The blonde woman across the kitchen table defends herself. “Because you know he has been flirting you since we were old enough to know what that is, right?”

Your response is a heavy sigh. “I know, I know. But I dare you to have a dry spell this long, filled with only bad dates and not start getting thoughts when someone undresses you with their eyes so openly any chance they get.”

“Please, you gotta have some standard left. What happened to ‘I wouldn´t even touch him with a ten-foot pole’?” Helaena pauses and looks to the side. “Oh, hi Aemond.”

You follow her gaze and see that her younger brother had just entered the room. Waving back at him as he nods to the two of you in greeting whispering a soft hey.

According to Helaena he had always been shy towards strangers and had stayed so even in your grown age now. But you were by far no stranger anymore. Helaena and you had been friends since first grade, and you had accompanied the family on multiple visits to their summer home. In all fairness you thought it was kinda cute how nervous he seemed to be around you. The way he stuttered and blushed gave a bit of life to his otherwise cold and rebelliously emo looks. And a crush never hurt anyone. Most times at least. There was a reason why anyone barely ever talked about the cases when it did. Aemond leaves the two of you alone and you continue the previous discussion. This time around you can´t shake the feeling of a gaze burning into your back though. Any time you turn around to the entrance though, there is no one to be seen.

“Are you okay?” Helaena asks with a huffed chuckle, tilting her head to the side. “Scared Aegon heard you and makes your wishes come true?”

Her low, raspy voice is light-hearted and though you know she is joking, you can´t shake the feeling of the hair at the nape of your neck standing up and the skin on your arms prickling.

“I´m fine.” You mutter rather dismissively. Taking a large gulp of the pretty, pink drink in front of you.

Together the two of you head outside to the pool side where you lay down on the sun chairs. Your body, clad in a skimpy one-piece bathing suit, barely hidden underneath a cover up is covered in goosebumps. Despite the comfortable warmth left by the sun. After a while of trying to relax, one last shiver runs down your spine and the previous uncomfortableness is gone. Like someone has pushed a switch. Thoughts of why you are so hung up on something like this persist though. Running around your brain in circles. Thinking about it deeper you realize that this wasn´t the first time you had felt like that in the house or on the premises. You had always chalked it up to the house being massive and old and someone has once been spying on someone else around here somewhere hundreds of years ago. Like in the Middle Ages or something. But now it did feel so much like that anymore.

A week later you find yourself in much a similar spot. This time a few hundred miles further south. The whole Hightower-Targaryen family had left for their summer home once more and as Helaena´s friend of course the invitation was extended to you as well. The reach was nice, and Helaena and you have always spent nothing short of memorable vacations there. However, this time around it´s too hot to do anything. Anything but try to keep body temperatures as low as possible by dangling your feet in the pool and enjoying ice cold drinks while gossiping with your best friend. And you weren´t about to complain about that. Not if it came served with this gorgeous environment that you couldn´t afford in a thousand lifetimes.

The two of you spend barely any time away from the pool unless it is to sleep. So, it is no wonder that it goes entirely unnoticed that by halfway through the vacation most of your underwear has gone missing. Disappearing right from the guest room into thin air while you were sprawled out and exchanging glances over a cigarette or your sunglasses with Aegon. Meanwhile, Aemond's absence goes unnoticed. Disregarded as something normal. The perfect excuse to spy on you. One hand down his pants, rubbing furiously at the straining length. A used pair of your panties wrapped snugly around it. His one good eye roaming over your strategically placed inviting figure splayed out on the sun lounge. The free hand props him up against the wall beside the window. With frantic motions he spills himself into the lace fabric, a subdued whimper filling the empty room, just as you rise to your feet. Shedding the cover up and throwing it to the side to dive into the pool. With ragged breaths Aemond buries the soiled fabric at the bottom of the laundry basket and moves away from the window. Before anyone can look up and see him. He almost felt bad at his actions. Almost. The tingling of pleasure left behind in his limbs from his previous actions did well to mask any other feeling. He doesn't realise how lucky he is to not get caught for so long.

“What the fuck?” You whisper under your breath on the last day of the vacation.

You had just walked into your room in the middle of the day to get your sunglasses which you had forgotten to grab before heading out with Helaena. Only to find one of your panties, which by now you had noticed gone missing, laid down perfectly on the large bed. The lacy fabric standing out against the beige of the bedsheets and standing out from the colour of the lace underwear, white stains. Well not quite dried into stains yet but rubbing the fluid between your thumb and forefinger leaves no doubt as to what was currently soaking into the fabric. For a moment you stand there as your mind races with thoughts of who could have done this. You hadn't seen anyone but Helaena and, very briefly that morning, her mother Alicent so anyone could come into question. And for your own mental health your brain settles on Aegon. Taking it as a hint, a consequence of flirting for the entire vacation with it not going anywhere yet. It's the least unsettling possibility to think about and being honest with yourself, the drop that made the cup overflow, in a way. Nevertheless, you tuck the panties into a safe place and head out again. Wanting to make use of the fact that the day was finally cool enough to go out and enjoy some time somewhere other than on the brink of heat stroke no matter the precautions.

Helaena and you are out all day. Being greeted by her brothers when you come back in the evening. Revealing the house was all yours for the last night as their mother and grandfather had to go back just a little earlier for business in the morning. The glint in Aegon's eyes tells you exactly what that means even before he pulls the neatly rolled joints out of his pocket. Smoking with him wasn't anything strictly restrained to the times when Alicent and Otto were out of the house, but with them gone it could be done a lot more openly and without having to worry about the smell. Outside, on the wide-ranging lawn, laid back on a large blanket. It was one of the rare occasions that the four of you all came together. And even rarer was that it happened in peace. There was no sibling fighting, which especially with Aegon and Aemond was so rare you thought about celebrating every time it did.

After dinner the four of you would head out into the garden. Everyone carrying some snacks or drinks, ready to enjoy a peaceful last night. Passing around the joints, revelling in the smoke filling your lungs and laying a veil over your brains as you slip into separate conversation. Beside you Helaena and Aemond start a deep talk that you only listen in on every nnow and again. Meanwhile Aemond watches you and Aegon laugh over the most stupid shit. Muttering jokes under your breaths to each other, leaning forward to be closer to each other. He grinds his teeth as you playfully shove his older brother by the arm and play with your hair. Aemond was sure that even with the weed numbing your senses Aegon couldn't ever possibly be that funny. The blood boils through his veins at the sight and yet he can't take his eyes off you.

Even if the others notice it, you don’t, and they don't say anything. There is nothing to a harmless flirtation after all. Soon enough Helaena bows out and seeing as you just pluck the joint from between Aegon's lips, Aemond stands up as well with so much as a growl and balled fists, though unlike his sister he doesn't head inside directly. Instead, he hides somewhere halfway to the house. Unable to take his eye off you.

With the others gone the tension between you and Aegon grows heavier yet, coming to a peak since you have started flirting weeks ago. And at the same time both of you are suddenly flooded with uncertainty on how to continue, but your hands twitch. Eager to make contact with the other's body. Slowly you inch closer to where you are sitting across from him until your feet stand on each side of his legs. When he doesn't move away, your hand inches closer until the pads of your fingers feel the surprisingly soft skin of Aegon's inner thigh right underneath the hem of his linen shorts. Instantly his leg twitches, leaning into it further just a second later. Aegon's legs spread a little more to allow his upper body to lean closer to you. Barely audible whimpers escape him at your ministrations and the way his hard length rubs against the inside of his shorts. Taking one last puff of the joint between your fingers, you carefully put it aside. Pressing the now free hand against his lips to keep him as quiet as possible.

“Ssshhh, wouldn't want anyone to catch us. Would we?” You whisper. Unable to hold back a giggle at the eagerness behind Aegon’s responding nod.

Your hand wanders to the apex between his thighs. Cupping the clothed, hardened length to provide just the smallest amount of stimulation. Aegon´s hips buck off the ground in response to it, searching for more of it. Then you feel his tongue against your fingers. Licking first but quickly wrapping around two digits. Sucking them into the warm, wet cavern of his mouth. This time it is your lips that leave out an affected whimper. The hand between his legs trembling as it opens the button and pulls down the zipper to take out his cock. Under Aemond´s hidden but ever watchful gaze, you lick your palm before wrapping around Aegon´s length, pumping it up and down at a teasingly slow pace. The same time as Aemond´s hand finds its way into his own pants. Imagining himself in Aegon´s stead at that moment as he grips onto the wall beside him and biting his lower lip to ground himself so he wouldn´t be heard whimpering as he mimics your hands speed. Thinking how soft your hands would be, how they would look wrapped around his arousal.

A pleased sigh brings him back to reality. A reality in which Aegon had just buried two fingers in your heat. Your head falls forward being half obscured by shadows, still even from afar it is visible how your jaw hangs open loosely around the sound that has just escaped. With a wet pop, you pull your fingers away from Aegon's mouth. Holding onto his shoulder to keep yourself upright instead.

“Please, faster.” Aegon whimpers just loud enough for you to hear.

The words broken up. One soft spoken and one whispered desperately. His fingers curling inside your velvety channel, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into your clit as added encouragement. Electric shocks zap through your legs, thighs snapping shut to keep his hand in place, making it hard not to give in to his plea. Almost instantly your hand begins pumping faster up and down his girth. And so does Aemond. Listening to the quiet, but lewd sounds from your mouth. Letting them spur him on, drive him closer to the edge of his pleasure. Shutting his eye tightly, Aemond bites his lip to keep silent as ropes of cum shoot from his cock. Imagining painting your face instead of the concrete underneath his feet. Only a few moments before Aegon and then you reach your peaks as well. So, while you two are still distracted by catching your breaths and fixing your clothes, Aemond slips into the house.

You make your way inside shortly after. Alone, to not raise suspicion. Face still warm and body tingling with satisfaction, when you quite literally walk into him in the hallway to the guest rooms.

“Oh, sorry.” You apologize in an instant, stumbling back a few steps.

Feeling a cold wall press against the warm skin of your back, you subconsciously run a hand through your hair. Your lashes flutter and your slightly parted lips release a breath as you look up at him. He catches your scent, weed and sweat but still that warm scent that is uniquely you and it's like a flip is switched in Aemond's brain. His eye visibly darkens when it roams over your form and suddenly the air in the hallway feels cold. He had always been taller than you, but in this moment, standing with a straight back Aemond towers over you even more. A small gasp escapes your lips as one of his hands connects to the wall right beside your face.

“A-Aemond what…?” Your eyes search his.

The only answer you get at first is a deep growl. “It sounds so good when you say my name.”

“What are you doing?” You demand to know though the demand is undermined by the whispering tone of your voice.

The change in his behaviour pulls the rug from underneath your feet and it feels like you are struggling not to fall into a gorge. Feet half over the edge, arms flailing and body struggling to keep from falling forward. Only to be given the last missing push by his following words.

“You are so pretty.” Aemond mutters lowly against your lips. “Aegon couldn´t ever worship you like you deserve.”

You gasp. At the closeness and at the possibility of him having seen what you did in the garden. Or if it was simply a reaction to having seen you two talk. The thought of having been not only caught but also watched in the act sends a cold shower down your spine. Shuddering as Aemond moves ever so slightly closer until there is barely any room for air left between the two of you.

“Not like I could.” He lets out a raspy growl. “Gods, I´m crazy for you.”

A flip switches in your own brain that moment, your eyes widening as you think back to the disappearing underwear and the ´gift’ you had found on your bed earlier. The likelihood of Aegon being the culprit being eradicated at a rapid pace.

“What are you saying?” You ask again.

This time with a less shaky voice. You just have to make sure, even though your mind still refuses to fully accept.

“You already know, darling. I know you found my little present for you. Seeing you walk around in these skimpy bathing suits every day for two weeks… It´s no wonder I can´t control myself.” Aemond cups your cheek in one hand when he answers.

There is a small smile turning the corners of his mouth upwards. It makes you break out in a cold sweat. Had he been the reason why you had felt watched at any given moment too? A stupid question with an obvious answer, but your mind races. Helplessly questioning everything that ever happened, every word exchanged. Somehow trying to find the fault in your own actions when there was none.

“Why?” You are sure you don´t want an answer to that question, but it is out before you can hold it back.

“Because you were stuck seeing me as nothing but the little boy I was when you and Helaena became friends. So busy looking for love anywhere but right in front of you…” He rasps, stealing a quick peck from your lips.

Your eyes widen even further, body frozen in place from the act that is so saccharine and so in contrast to the whole situation that you can´t help but feel the need to run. Damned to be stuck in the moment.

“I could give you everything you want. Everything you need.” Another peck is stolen from your lips.

Then one is placed against your cheek, and another to your jawline, your teeth instantly clenching. And then more follow down the side of your neck.

With no fight put up against from your side, as you are unable still stuck in your position pressed against the wall, his hand has free reign to leave your cheek and gently push up the flimsy shirt you are wearing. His touch is feather light and reverent. Tracing the soft skin around your areolas and then closing in around your nipples. “Aemond…” You whimper, trying to lean away from him but being stopped by the wall still in your back. “I´ve loved you for so long. Let me show you.” He takes you into the nearest room and lays you onto the bed. Your body listening to him more than your own brain. It´s easy giving into him. To just let him do what he wants and in the morning you would all leave anyway. It's almost warm. His touch. His palms roaming up and down your sides in soothing circles. Mirroring the sentiment of his previous words. On the inside though nothing can pierce the cold dread at what is to come first. Then there is a strange calm settling inside you. There is no stopping him and getting away with it. Not realistically.

Aemond quickly discards of your shirt before gently laying you back down again. His tongue traces down over the pulse point at the side of your neck in an instant. Alternating it with wet, open-mouthed kisses once he reaches your collar bones. A shiver runs through you as he nibbles on your breasts and suckles on the nubs atop until the are standing hard at attention. Only then he steadily goes lower, from the valley between your mounds over the soft expanse of your stomach, down to the waistband of the maxi skirt that covered your legs. His hands follow down your sides at the same pace as his hands. Pulling down all the fabric that separates your skin from his direct touch, without ever taking his lips away.

Your thighs, which are pressed together tightly, but at the gentlest tap of his fingers against them, they open. Mentally bracing yourself for the intrusion of his fingers that follows shortly after. Tracing two slender digits along the slit, gently pushing them inside the warmth of your core. The velvety walls clamp down on his fingers until you will them to relax. Aemond´s breath shudders, fanning over the growing wetness as he watches his fingers disappear into the channel with rapt attention. His thumb laying on your clit to rub gentle circles into it.

It feels wrong. The wetness that begins to collect between your thighs and coats his fingers. It shouldn´t be there. You shouldn´t be there. And yet it still is, you still are and as if with a mind of its own, your body writhes against the soft sheets. The whimpers that fall from your lungs feel foreign, drawing the attention of his gaze upwards. In return your eyes screw shut tight. There is no need to look at him to know of the desire etched onto his sharp facial features and shimmering in his eye. You try instead to think yourself out of this room. Imagine you are anywhere but in this room, at this moment. Only to be brought back by the sound of his belt buckle.

Aemond doesn't even take the time to undress. Barely pulls out his still hard cock and runs it against your slit before aligning it with your entrance. The tip breaches your channel, when one of his hands props him up beside your head and the other finds your cheek.

“Look at me. Please.” He urges you, waiting until your eyelids flutter open to continue talking. “I love you. I mean it. I love you so much.” Stealing a kiss from your lips once more, Aemond pushes his length inside of you until he bottoms out. Visibly revelling in the whimper that forcefully pushes past your lips. There is a moment of pause, in which he lets you get used to the feeling of his cock inside of you, that is filled only with the sound of both of your breathing and the rustling of the sheets beneath you. The rest of the house is deadly quiet.

When he begins to move, your body is shaken by every languid, smooth roll of his hips. The cold silver chain with the small seven-pointed star pendant dangling just over your face.

“You feel so good.” Your nails dig into the mattress when you hear the whispered words.

Damp palms pressed against silk sheets, forcing your eyes to keep looking at him like he wants no matter how much your head aches to turn away from him. It´s like a mantra echoing in your mind repeatedly. It´s gonna be over tomorrow, just make it until tomorrow. But seconds turn into eternities underneath his muscular frame, held in place with only one of his hands laid gently against your cheek. The thought alone is sickening. And the coil that winds in your stomach makes you feel even sicker at yourself and the world. Nevertheless, it coils tighter. And tighter and tighter. Much to Aemond´s delight. Whose erection twitches eagerly once he pulls out. The hand beside your head gets taken away, back to your clit to resume rubbing circles into the swollen flesh. Only a few to force you over the edge, all while he grinds his soaked cock against your slit.

With a needy whimper from above, his release painting your lower stomach in white splatters.

For a moment there is only huffed breathing as he remains hunched over you for a bit longer. Then Aemond rolls of you. Pulling you with him to lay on your side, hugged securely against him. Your eyes burn when you finally get the chance to hide your face from him. Your breathing staying at its laboured pace long past his, but not a single tear crosses your lower lash line. And in another miracle, you can even force yourself to fall asleep beside him. His confessed feelings and all he had done ringing in your ear the entire time.

[tac-the-unseen]

How COD characters react to you admitting you've faked an Orgasm

Angst with minor fluff

Note: There are many reasons someone might fake an orgasm. Someone could not be in the mood anymore, feel uncomfortable in the environment, get tired, and several other reasons. That is what this fic is about, not about 'weak dick game'

Ghost:

•When you dropped that bomb on him he froze. He didn't move, speak, or even blink. He just sat there, staring at you. His mind is racing. He always felt like a Shitty partner and he feels like this proves it.

•Once he found his ability to move he only took a breath. Then after a few seconds took your hand and looked into your eyes. You try to explain your reasoning but he still felt like shit.

•Finally he mutters softly "Why didn't you tell me?" He genuinely feels heart broken that he left you unsatisfied and you didn't voice it to him sooner.

•He sits down and has a long discussion about the why and how. He wants to know how to be a better partner and to make sure you're always comfortable telling him if you need more from him.

Soap:

•He thinks you're joking at first. He makes comments like "yeah right, totally." But once he finds out you're telling him the truth he freaks out.

•He grabs you and and almost crys. He feels like a bad partner and tries to come up with ideas on how to make sure you're alway satisfied with him.

•Sex becomes very different. He's constantly changing positions and asking if he's doing this right. Everytime you two get intimate he seems nervous and tries to solely focus on you.

Price:

•Stunned by the news. He stamers and look embarrassed. He stares at you like you grew wings and flew away. You can tell he's trying to keep his cool but it's not working.

•He buys you multiple gifts ranging from flowers to vibrators. While he does this you notice sex becoming less frequent and when you do have sex he seems less in it.

•When you ask about it he finally breaks down and cries. He says he feels like he can't satisfy you anymore. "What kind of boyfriend/fiance/Husband am I if you have to fake it just so you don't make me feel bad!?" After a talk he kinda gets over it but he doesn't like talking about it.

Alejandro:

•He also thinks your joking at first, but after you tell him you're not lying he stares at you. He starts to curse in both English and Spanish and gets upset. He throws a plate at the wall before slumping on the kitchen counter.

•"Why did you wait to tell me, mi amor!?" He says while not looking at you. When you explain he's quiet. After a while he asks how to make it up to you.

•You bet your ass he's going to pamper and worship you in anyway you please. Makes you promise to tell him and never fake an orgasm again.

Roach:

•He immediately hugged you and nuzzled into your neck. He let's you explain why you faked it and understands that it wasn't his fault. He thanks you for telling him and keeps close to you for the rest of the day.

•The next time you guys had sex he made sure you came several time. He has a little bit of doubt when it comes to his performance but over all just happy you told his so you could work it out together.

Gaz:

•Freezes up and after a minute he's leaves the room to be by himself for a while. He goes over every Sexual encounter he's had with you to try and figure out the when and why.

•Once he thinks he's got it he comes back to talk to you. He wants to know how to make sure you're satisfied. He seems to move on pretty quickly. But everytime you have sex he confirms with you that you at least orgasmed once.

König:

•He stares at you in shock like a deer in headlights before running aways. He hides in his room and has a anxiety attack. He feels like a horrible partner. All that runs through his head is the idea that you're going to leave him for someone that always satisfys you. It shatters his heart to know that he, at some point, neglected your needs.

•Once he calms down a bit he finds you and begs you to let him make it up. "I'll do anything, Schatz! Please I can be better!" You try and comfort him be he won't stop until you tell him what you want and/or need. It doesn't even have to be sexual related, just something to ease his mind.

Rudy:

•Is in denial. He doesn't want to hear it but you notice he takes more time to focus on your pleasure. Or at least, more than before.

•It secretly eats at him for weeks. This has never happened to him before. Then he starts to spiral. What if this wasn't the first time, just the first time someone's told him about it...he dies inside just a little.

Mace:

•He takes a second to soak in that information then he holds you tightly. He kisses you jaw and calmly asks if he can make up for those unsatisfactory nights.

•If/when you agree he gives you the best head of your life. He stays down there for what seems like hours. He checks in on you and apologizes every once in a while.

•After words once you two are ready you guys talk about proper ways you satisfy you and make sure you feel loved.

[athetos]

Some thoughts from severance s2e3, and the season in general:

I 100% assumed the reason the goat people were asking to see their bellies was to see if they had belly buttons. Since the prevailing theory is that the goats are for cloning purposes, i figured they wanted to make sure they weren’t clones (clones not having belly buttons because they weren’t birthed/have need for an umbilical cord). If we take the pouches line at face value, I’d guess that they were told a rumor that MDR had pouches, to sow division and fear between the departments (like the fake uprising told to MDR about O&D, and vice versa).

The Export Floor. The fact that O&D used to deliver things there themselves, but then a courier was used. My theory is that someone saw something there they shouldn’t have. I don’t know how o!Irving knows about it, but I’m not here to discuss that right now. What I want to talk about is the name. The obvious one is exporting goods (or even ideas) to other countries, and this could simply mean it’s where stuff made by O&D gets sent up to the ‘outtie’ world. But there’s another possibility - export as in transferring data to another software/format. I think it’s this meaning that is critical, and has big implications for Gemma/Ms. Casey. They could be transferring the data MDR has refined to her chip, or in some way or another, working on “Cold Harbor.”

I am very firmly in the ‘that’s Helena’ camp now. I don’t think this is in character for Helly, as the extremely awkward conversation in the hall with Mark as well as telling Irving they ‘got him’ sealed it for me. I’m fairly certain that management knows it’s Helena; after all, they don’t activate her chip, although I won’t rule out she paid someone off/threatened them to do it. That said, I like to believe she compromised with the board to go down as herself, instead of as Helly. This would also mean that she can encourage Mark to go places that Lumon specifically wants him to see, instead of ones that are much more confidential. However, I think she’ll end up siding with the innies by the end, simply because the connections she will forge with them will be the only genuine and loving relationships in her life.

I didn’t mention this before, but i’m pretty sure Irving knows that Helena/Helly is lying, because he was the only innie who spent enough time outside to know that it was winter and she couldn’t have been gardening. He distrusts her, that’s why he only told Dylan about Burt.

Upon immediately seeing Dylan’s wife I assumed she was a hired actress. However it genuinely appears to be her (granted, I’m faceblind, but the voice sounded the same when she was with his outtie later in the episode). Lumon clearly thinks that this perk will keep i!Dylan in line, but I think it might backfire spectacularly, or at least cause significant drama - his wife is going to fall in love with his innie. Think about it, if their marriage is going through a rough patch, and she gets to spend time with a version of her husband who lacks all of the assumptions/grudges he has against her - basically starting all over… yeah, it’s gonna get strange. The way she talked about it to o!Dylan was like she was hiding it from him, almost like it’s the beginning of a potential affair…

(I also am still of the mind that either she or one of their children is terminally ill in some way, hence the benefits/insurance that Dylan is always looking after. He also complained a few times about having sore arms and jokes he works out. I feel this might be related somehow? But not sure…)

I stand by my theory that the board is actually the motherboard and is Kier’s (and his successors?) consciousness, or something of that ilk. The board was referred to as “it” in this episode (also “they”, but I believe that was meant as in plural, including Natalie). So I think we actually don’t have any proof that it’s multiple people or even people period. It will be like the export double meaning I mentioned earlier. Again, the board is hot on Mark staying and working because it wants him to finish Cold Harbor so it can begin the revival of Kier’s family (the rotation could potentially mean their minds being uploaded. Or something of that nature.)

No big theories or details to chew on here, but things that got big reactions from me: the Black Kier portraits I was expecting but still not prepared for. I desperately want to see Natalie’s portraits that she received; were they all biracial, all women, or both? The idea of genderbent biracial Kier family is killing me. This is like Hamilton (I think). Cobel definitely was going to die if she went into the building, she made the right call, I was terrified that her car might explode as she left. Phew. Next episode is going to be a roller coaster, I can tell. Shocked that he’s starting reintegration so soon but I’m here for it. Worried that Devon is going to get murdered. And I’m waiting for Cobel to get hunted down by Mark or for her to willingly seek him out as she realizes this is her only chance left to… do whatever the fuck it is she wants to do.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Paradigm Shift 3

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: you get transferred to a new position but it’s hardly a breath of fresh air. (plus!reader)

Characters: Loki, Bucky Barnes, this reader is known as Billie.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself💜

💼Part of the Bad Bosses AU💼

Dark roast, black. You're tempted to order one for yourself but the extra dose of caffeine might unhinge you after the morning you've had. Transfer, no desk, a firing, a stolen desk, and two painfully aloof bosses.  

You go back up to the office, the short reprieve offering some clarity but not solutions. There has to be some way to get more than a grunt and a closed door from these men. Geez, if you wanted to work with children you would've done so. 

You knock on Mr. Barnes' door. The one next to it opens first. Laufeyson considers you from head to toe and Barnes appears not a second after. He takes his cup without a thanks. 

"Mm, and where is mine then?" Laufeyson challenges. 

You blink, long and hard. Of course. Of course! You let out a slow breath, "what would you like, Mr. Laufeyson?" 

You don't miss the quiet snort from the other door and it closes before you can glance Barnes' expression. You have a suspicion he expected this. It's like your first job when you worked with a bunch of men in stocks. Their numbers were as bloated as their egos. 

“Matcha.” 

The door shuts in your face. Again. You bite down and stretch your fingers wide. It’s fine. It’s fine. Growing pains. 

Matcha... what? Iced? Latte? Hot tea? Smoothie? Wonderful, a guessing game. 

You will be getting yourself another coffee for the trouble. Another trip to Roasters and you settle on the simplest option; just tea. You’re certain if you’re wrong, he’ll let you know.  

You stand at the two office doors and contemplate your life decisions. Is this worth it? Can you beg Odinson to take you back? To send down another poor soul? You almost feel bad doing that to someone else. You’re about to give when that innate stubborn ticks in your jaw. It’s only been a few hours. You don’t just give up that easy. 

Knock, knock. There’s a delay before Laufeyson answers. You’re not put off by it. You know the tactic. It won’t work on you. If his tea is cold, it won’t be your fault. 

“Matcha, sir,” you hold out the cup. 

He accepts it and reads the sticker on the side. He narrows his green eyes and looks at you, “note for next time, I prefer Garcon’s to Roasters.” 

Click. Another shut door. You’re really starting to get angry. You laugh out the flurry of agitation and turn away. What else can you do but think of it as a joke? It has to be. It’s just that absurd. 

You sit at the desk and open your laptop. You get it hooked up to the monitor and refinagle the cords. That’s an accomplishment at least. A tiny morsel of victory. You glance around and frown. It’s like the waiting room in Beetlejuice; everyone looks miserable. Well, can you blame them? 

Your phone buzzes and you check the messages. Girl nights hangs like bait at the end of your day, keeping you swimming through dark waters. It’s a bit ridiculous. Your friends are all like you in one way but all vastly different in many other ways. You all spend your days taking care of men who couldn’t give a shit about any of you. 

You can already taste the Paloma; bitter grapefruit with the burn of tequila. You are dying to drink away this day. You look at the clock and nearly whimper. It’s not even one o’clock. Ugh. 

You plug away at your desk. You get the daily agendas templated then spend time scouring the web. You have something in mind. You’re pretty sure you can make it work. As long as those grumps can do the simplest of tasks. 

You customize the survey and send the link. You doubt you’ll get a response today or even at all. It’s a hail mary, really. Barnes’ door opens, then Laufeysons. Your chest fills with dread. Great. 

“Hello, sir and... sir,” you sit up as they approach. 

“What is the meaning of that quiz?” Laufeyson demands. 

“It’s not-- 

“Asking a lot, aren’t you?” Barnes crosses his arms. 

“No, I just--” 

“What business do you have about my dry cleaning?” Laufeyson hisses. 

“I have lunch when I have lunch. I'm not a child at grade school,” Barnes sneers.

“Okay, woah,” you put your palms out, “first, there’s an n/a column, you can choose not to disclose the information. Two, I need to know what to do. What do you want from me?” 

Both men frown and look at each other, then back to you. 

“I can think of one,” Laufeyson raises a finger, “don’t treat us as children who need you to put our socks on.” 

“Good one,” Barnes scoffs, “also, you could stop with calendar reminders.” 

“Those are automatic,” you mutter. 

“And the arguing,” Laufeyson points at you. 

You sputter, dizzy at their onslaught of criticism. They can tell you exactly what they don’t want but they can’t give you a clear answer as to why you are there. You calm yourself with a breath and sip of coffee. 

“Mr. Laufeyson, Mr. Barnes--” 

“Why him first? My name’s first alphabetically,” Barnes says. 

“I--” you stop yourself and take another taste of your coffee, “if my presence is getting in the way of your work, I will go back upstairs and talk to Mr. Odinson--” 

“Mr. Odinson? Thor?” Laufeyson says, “no, you won’t do that. In fact, that is another item for your list, no talking to my brother. Especially of me.” 

You could tear your hair out. You could hit your head on the wall. You could gauge your eyes out and drown yourself in your coffee. Instead, you smile. 

“Got it,” you say, “well, sirs, good luck with your meeting this afternoon.” 

“Yes, thank you,” Laufeyson intones. 

“Mm, sure,” Barnes says and they both turn on their heels then stop at once. They face you in sync with each other. 

“Meeting?” They ask. 

“Mmhm,” you nod, “it’s in your calendars.” 

They stare at you. 

“If that’s something you’d like me to brief you on,” you say tritely, “you can submit that in the survey.” 

Laufeyson hums dryly and Barnes growls. Neither says anything further as they retreat. You keep your eyes on the screen as your heartbeat races. You can’t believe you said that. 

[autumnwhistles]

On c!Martyn and Caring

Martyn and loyalty are two words that, in discussions, tend to go hand-in-hand. Whether it's praising his devotion to Ren or analysing his betrayals, he can never escape that contradiction. Is he loyal, or not?

I think it goes deeper than that. While c!Martyn is full of contradictions, it isn't only loyalty that's at the core. Rather, it's the wider subject of how he interacts with players at all, how close he gets to them, and how he reacts to caring.

It's both a question of how much, and how deeply, and contradictions are found in both aspects. On one hand, Martyn is a very solitary player. CC!Martyn says as much – that he tends to play a solo game, despite having a "person of interest" each time he'll check in on (whose back he has "until [he doesn't], until [his] sword goes in it"). On the other, he's extremely sociable – though he rarely gets close to others, he spends almost all of his time talking to others, joking with them, heading from group to group. On one hand, he's completely focused on self-preservation, willing to backstab and betray at a moment's notice if it suits his game. On the other, he has a capacity for honour and loyalty, and – crucially – losses do affect him deeply. Again, CC!Martyn describes this contradiction very well.

There are always these two conflicting wishes within him – for self-protection (whether from physical or emotional harm), but also despite himself, for care. And two quotes represent the contradiction. One in-universe:

I learned there was nothing in this world for me – nothing but walls, corners, edges. And you know what, you showed me life. As much as I’ve taken it from you, you gave it back to me in buckets’ fulls. - Shortly after Ren's beheading, 3rd LIfe

And one from CC!Martyn:

[Ren's final death in 3rd Life] was the moment that kind of broke character!Martyn and made him more selfish moving forward. - Martyn's post-Limited Life lore stream

A wish, and the consequences of indulging in it. It's a balance he'll have to walk for as long as the games continue.

So, let's explore it.

Pre-Win

It's pretty clear that walls, corners and edges are the only thing Martyn has seen for a long time now. After so many games, so much bloodshed without ever an end in sight – even after winning, nothing changes – it's hard to search for anything else. But back, back before the Red King's rise, seeing the world that way wasn't enough.

3rd Life

Martyn starts, as he always does, as a wanderer. He's a bit of an outsider from the beginning – he's not a Hermit, he was never a member of X-Life or any of Scott's other series, and though he has been in one MCC team with Scott and another with Joel, the people he's truly familiar with (the EVO crew) are by far in the minority. It's only really BigB and Skizz in the same boat.

It's no surprise, then, that he takes the first chance to form an alliance he gets (with members he's all familiar with) – the Blue Sword boys. But though he does think about the alliance far longer than the others do, it's not so much of an emotional commitment. We're still at the stage where he thinks there's "nothing in this world for [him]", after all.

There's another similarity between early game Martyn and the Martyn we're more familiar with: he's focused on survival from the start. He's always worried about Ren being too kind, about Ren spilling secrets. He hides his own resources (eg the Ender chest), he spends most of his time away from Dogwarts, he's ready to leave if Ren doesn't toughen up. In many ways, pre-Red Winter Martyn isn't all too different from post-3rd Life Martyn. He's always been worried about the impacts of others on his game.

What he's not worried about yet is the emotional impact on himself of others dying.

So he indulges in that life Ren has shown him gladly. He gladly takes up the mantle of Hand, of protector, taking no effort to hide his loyalties or to emotionally distance himself, and leaving no contingencies in case things go wrong.

Then, Ren dies.

Only a few metres away from Martyn, but out of his line of sight.

C!Martyn breaks. He'll live with the knowledge of the consequences of caring forever.

And we see this in...

Last Life

Is it better to have loved and lost, or to never have loved at all? For C!Martyn, it's cleary the latter. And there's one clear change in his alliances this time round that shows this: contingency plans.

Especially at the start, Martyn doesn't tie himself closely to the Southlands. He has options to escape them – Ren especially is an option if things go wrong, and later down the line he forms a whole secret alliance (the Shadow Alliance) as well. Of course, this means he'd have the option to use the Southlands to escape the Shadow Alliance as well, though since the Southlands does considerably worse in every metric, this never really becomes necessary.

He isn't tied as closely to Ren this time, either. Though they are allied, he's completely fine with attacking him in the Battle Royale at the end. Of course they planned to fight if they were the final two in 3rd Life, but there are still two pairs of alliances left – Scott and Pearl, and technically Martyn and Ren – and sticking with his doesn't cross Martyn's mind. Maybe accepting Ren's going to die, helping participate in that himself, is easier than trying to protect him and failing again.

So, Martyn makes efforts. But, despite this, he does end up getting close with his allies, especially with the Southlanders (excluding Grian) he had so many plans to escape from. He makes a habit of imitating Mumbo's intro at the start of each session; he votes to keep Jimmy in the alliance even after Jimmy had betrayed them by running away with a life they were passing around as a test of loyalty (Martyn's own life, no less). Viewing the world as only walls and corners wasn't enough for him back in 3rd Life, and no matter how reluctantly he tries to always give himself an out if things go wrong, it clearly isn't enough for him here, either – he does start to genuinely involve himself with them, genuinely care for them.

This care works, yet again, to Martyn's own detriment. Though it doesn't cause his death this time, he mourns them enough to hallucinate their presence – and, importantly the 'promise' of bringing them back to life is what the Voice (a mysterious entity that's been talking to him and telling him what to do for most of the season) uses to keep him obedient.

Martyn: And what if I don't like it your way? Voice: Do as we say. Martyn: W-Why should I? Voice: We can bring them back. Martyn: I don't believe you... Voice: We tell no lies Martyn: Fi-Fine! - LL Ep 8 intro, right after the hallucinations (seriously if you haven't watched any of his POV watch these moments). They're not brought back, of course.

He cares! No matter how much he tries to stop, or pretend he doesn't, c!Martyn is someone who cares deeply. That's something often missed in him.

And that's exactly why he takes so many measures against it.

Double Life

Devotion didn't work, and contingencies didn't, either. So, what does Martyn immediately do in Double Life after finding his soulmate? Cut Pearl off, even after both have been similarly abandoned. He can't take that chance again – he's learned twice now that having close bonds with others, whether you intend to turn on them or not, only ever leads to tragedy. He's learned that the hard way.

But... there is still someone Martyn tries to get close to. Cleo. It's the only time we ever see him actively trying to make a connection with someone, and whether tactics played a role in it or not, I think this is for one main reason: as they're soulbound, their lives are linked. For once, there's no risk of your closest friend dying before your eyes. For once, you don't have to plan to betray and escape, because it's not just one person winning the games – it's both of you, together.

And, for once, this works out for him! They don't win, of course – but when it comes down to it, him and Cleo do work together in their final moments. She doesn't turn on Martyn when he attacks Scott, and she fights Pearl with him. For once, he and his ally die together. In fact, this is the only time he arguably lost because he was too distant from others – it was his rejected ally who killed him, and it was him instantly turning on Scott after they were the final four which lead to the fight starting so soon. I do think Pearl and Scott were more likely to win even if Martyn had done things differently – both of them are very good in fights, and though Martyn is too, it's not Cleo's strong suit – but it's an interesting thing to note...

...Not that it changes anything about Martyn's mindset heading into the next game.

Limited Life

Why would Martyn's mindset change? After all, he successfully avoided what hurt the most, and so he instead doubles down. Yes, he's teamed with Scott – and even then, he's alone for the entire first episode, and only goes to Scott in the second after it's clear others have already formed their groups (numbers are a tactical advantage, after all) – but it's never meant to last. He'll protect him while others are standing, but the intention was always to betray him, to kill him eventually, thinking about it at least as early as Episode 4. To Martyn, their alliance is "fleeting and fragile" (linked in the previous clip), and there's even an excitement that comes from thinking about the betrayal. So, when the time comes to do this, he doesn't hesitate – though the Watchers' amplification of emotions did play a role (also in the lore stream), he's quick to turn on him and cut him down, expressing no apparent regret or remorse. Yet again, a success for Martyn!

...The thing is, all this comes at a cost. Those buckets' fulls of life he saw with Ren have emptied long ago, the corners and edges taking up his entire vision. Everyone is a number, a tactic, a liability, and the one who gave him those bucketfulls is fone. And in the end, being successful in his betrayal doesn't even change anything. Though part of his soul is protected from fragmenting (more info on what that means here), he can't know that. He's just thrust into another game with the same players, still missing Ren, to kill once again. He wanted so much for things to be over, to be the last one standing – "none of these niceties, this is a death match for a reason".

But... nothing changes. If surviving doesn't get you anything, and that was your only aim, that was what you gave everything for (alongside avoiding pain)... what, exactly, do you have to live for?

Post-Win

Secret Life

Now, I admit Secret Life came out at a time my interest in the Life Series was at a low, so I haven't actually watched anyone's perspective though (I did watch most of Martyn's, but the closest I got was watching nearly all of Etho's, since this was around the time of Decked Out 2. And I loved watching Etho play Decked Out 2). But there are two things to note with Martyn here. One, he's being a lot more reckless, partly because he's used to relying on hearts returning, but I think it's also because of the win being so inconsequential. Is there a point in spending all that effort surviving till the end?

Two, he's allied with... Jimmy?

If Martyn ends up hurt when his allies die before him, why ally with the player known for dying first?

Again, part of it may be tactics. Martyn nearly always spends the first episode wandering instead of immediately forming alliances, so he tends to team up with whoever's in a similar boat. But still – why pick the person known for permadying first? The person who Martyn had already been hurt by the death of once, in Last Life?

Maybe he's confident after Double Life and Limited Life. Maybe he thinks he's successfully managed to tread the line between 'useful ally' and 'friend you actually care about', and will be successful again. Maybe because Jimmy is so consistently first out, him dying early is more of an inevitability than a possibility (in Martyn's mind) – it won't come as a shock, and Martyn can be prepared. Maybe the fact that Jimmy did die that way in Last Life makes his inevitable death less impactful this time round.

Maybe it's also because he now knows winning gets you nothing, and he'd like to see those bucketfulls again.

Though it often doesn't show in the Life series itself, Jimmy is probably the closest person to him after Ren. For Martyn, the Life series is a direct continuation of EVO – a very long-running series in which his closest bond was with Jimmy, going through it all as a duo. He does express a wish to get close to him in 3rd Life because of this, but after Jimmy rejects him for Scott, Martyn stops bringing it up.

But they're close to each other, and met each other in a context other than the death games. Maybe this alliance is a way of trying to find that life again. I wish I'd followed the series closely enough at the time to see if it was successful, and I'll find out soon enough.

...Whatever the motivation, though, Martyn is there again when he dies (even after he's not the first out). And no matter how careful he might've been being, no matter how successfully he treaded the line the two times before – once again, it hurts.

"These idiots are just laughing. They have absolutely no idea … what they just unleashed. The hound of hell is coming. There will no bark. Only BITE." - Martyn internally, at the end of Episode 6.

So you'd think that after this, Martyn reverts to keeping his distance, right? He tried something and it didn't work, so he dials it all the way back?

In another world, maybe that would've happened. The thing is, there's one difference.

Ren.

Wild Life

This is the first season since Double Life where he spent the first session with someone else, and the first season ever where he goes with that person immediately and then sticks in an alliance with them until the very end. For once, it's a conscious and immediate choice to stick with one person (one not lifebound to him) – Ren's been gone too long, so die first or not, it doesn't matter.

Maybe that isn't the whole story, though. Because the recklessness, worse than ever, continues.

...Let's take a break, and remind ourselves of 3rd Life. Martyn was one of the last Greens, only dying in session seven, and was the second-last player on Green if we exclude BigB, who wasn't physically there in session 7 and so couldn't die (only Impulse outlived him). Let's remind ourselves of Last Life, which is even more impressive – he died for the first time in session 8, after half the server had been eliminated, and was the last Yellow standing. Even then, he successfully managed to hide for a long time, only dying because he got sick of knowing he was always being hunted and decided to mark his location to the Reds with lava to go out in a final stand, coming third overall. In Double Life, we have the same pattern – though he and Cleo went to Yellow after Martyn miscalculated when pushing her on a cliff, the pair were once again the last Yellows, and Martyn once again came third. He's actually the only player in Double Life who didn't die himself once (...though that's on a technicality, since he was directly behind his and Cleo's first deaths). In Limited Life, though he had a rough start, he won.

If pre-win Martyn is good at one thing, it's survival.

But after?

We've already talked about Secret Life, but Wild Life takes this newfound recklessness to the extreme. This isn't about placement – it certainly impacts it, but his last two deaths especially were caused by something else (...sort of) – but about the way his life is treated as an afterthought, completely secondary to the antics he wants to do in that moment. He comes across a wheat farm people are saying is trapped, and the first thing he does is pick a piece of wheat, stand on it and break it, to see if that's the one that explodes (none do, but he does this multiple times!). He starts a game of chicken under a ledge people are actively throwing TNT minecarts off of, involving himself in every round. He drops down to Yellow due to flicking a suspicious trapdoor in the middle of someone's base (because he was "bored")... and his immediate reaction to this is "okay, good"??? Though that may be because he can use the death to guilt trip others for resources, or to distract people so Skizz could try to get some kills (as he was trying to before), it still shows that he values his life very little. He's killed by Pearl because he turns his back to a player with a grudge against him (Martyn just blew up her entire team barring her), who'd already placed down an End Crystal (which was then destroyed by Martyn's bow) in the same interaction. He volunteers himself for a plan (by Grian) which involves him definitely dying and turning Red – Grian's pitch is "is anyone up for a massive sacrifice mission?" – due to being the distraction keeping everyone in place while Grian shoots an End Crystal at the place Martyn has gathered them. He does ask Ren if it's okay with him (clipped there tooo) before agreeing, but that's the only consideration he takes. With his first death to Scar, there wasn't much indication Martyn would be suddenly pushed off, so I'll let it slide (Scar was still Red, though). Scar attacking him the final time was similar... but it should be noted that Martyn died to his own creeper, saying "I at least thought we would both go out together" as a response (though he did die this way back in Last Life too, with an End Crystal instead). This is not someone who's okay. And Ren does pick up on this – not that it does anything in the end.

As a result, Martyn goes out before Ren – only his second time dying before an ally (BigB outplaced him in 3rd Life by one), and his first ever time dying before his closest.

And I can't help but think – was this the reason he was being so reckless? I'm sure being restless played a role as well, but if you don't care about getting to the end anymore since nothing awaits you there... the only way to escape the pain of losing an ally is being the one to die first. This way he gets to both genuinely enjoy the time he spends with someone, unafraid of what caring might cause, and to not feel the pain of losing them.

If this were the case, it would be a selfish move. But as we established at the very beginning – Martyn has always been one to protect himself.

Conclusion

What happens when you're trapped in a death game? When you know how everything will end, that those close to you will die; when you know yourself well enough to know you'll be affected? When you try not to care, but something inside you still aches for that little bit more – but also when, ultimately, you're your fist priority?

...In discussions of c!Martyn and loyalty, a thought that's often brought up is that Martyn never really cared about his allies in the first place. He was always planning to betray them to win, after all. Of course, the latter is true – at least before his win. But I think the reason behind it is a little muddled.

Martyn doesn't betray others because he doesn't care.

He betrays them because he knows he will.

[galactic-rhea]

how do you think anakin (or your anakin) would take clovis? i found those episodes to be really ooc😭

Oh boy, I knew this day would come,,,the day in which someone asked me about these awful episodes, thanks user @songspirits now this conversation won't have to wait any longer NKLJnjfdf

To quote a friend of mine that only watched the movies when I told her the summary of the Clovis arc: "I think Anakin would've asked padme to held her wig instead while she personally goes to fight that guy, the anakin i know at least"

Jokes aside, I'll have to break this down on a few points because there's just,,,a lot going on in these episodes (to be clear I don't intend to change anyone's mind in the matter, since i already know many ppl believe these episodes to be good for anakin's ehh,,,going-evil characterization). This will get long.

So first of all: The very first episode where Clovis shows up is just alright, could've been done much better but seriously I don't have many issues with it.

The problem arises with the new ones in season 6. The why I feel Anakin is out character in these episodes is because his very, very well known and yet somehow missinterpreted flaw is that he reacts with extreme violence, especially when scared, scared not for himself but for someone he cares about.

So him reacting badly and going directly for a bloody fistfight against Clovis wasn't the problem of the episodes. It was how he treated Padmé. Like, literally telling her he would leave her in jail if she kept mentioning Clovis, lmao. Also the "You have no say on this" yadayada. I think the writer for these episodes was probably taking their confrontation at Mustafar as a reference point, which...No, that shouldn't have been the case bc in Mustafar that guy literally turned evil (literally!) and he had lost touch with reality. And also the stakes were higher. And also his anger was completely different there.

But, at the same time, if I play the devil's advocate, I can see some...eh, explanations there. For example he had recently lost Ahsoka and one of his men, the War was on the third year, and Padmé was decidely working with someone that already almost got her killed once, and she wasn't listening to him. They didn't even actually discussed the situation very well. And when Anakin says that "as your husband, I ask-" he turns around and is completelly unable to look at her in the eyes, so it could very well be that not even himself believed that, he was mostly throwing onto the table every single card he had. And one could argue that there's no way he didn't hear/notice/sense/ whatever that Padmé wasn't okay with that kiss.

But even then, the writers were clearly going for your very average possesive-sexist-angry-jealous- boyfriend, which isn't Anakin's problem, like I said, his problem is how deeply scared he is of Padmé being hurt. So Anakin's main concern shouldn't be that he's being cheated on, but that Padmé could be hurt, and they kinda touched on that but they failed at portraying that well, and I think it's because:

a) This episode shows us an extremelly common trope in shows with many episodes and many one-time-plots: The classic add-another-person-so-main-character-gets-jealous-. And almost always this type of episode gets us very ooc characterizations, no matter the show, because this society usually can't see any other reaction that isn't angry-possesive-violent jealousy. He also treats Padmé quite badly even before she decides to keep working with him, which is a no-no for me.

b) The shows forgets that Anakin does, actually, has a lot of faith and trust in Padmé's abilities. Yes, he worries, a lot, but he still is very confident on her being a more than capable person. He doesn't want to keep her in a cage or something, part of the reason he's so in love with her is because of how capable and intelligent she is. In ROTS is different because he quite literally had a prophetic vision that proved to be true before, and there's very little to do in this case, it had nothing to do with abilities or someone else. Also, if AOTC tells me anything, is that they're fairly talktative aka they communicate fairly well. Even in previous episodes we see that Padmé is great at communicating and discussing (look at how she reassured Ahsoka when Ahsoka was worried about her. Or that little bit where she's concerned about a party.); in this episode there was none of that until after Anakin almost kills a guy.

c) I think they simply, and flatly, just wanted to show Anakin being dangerous and darker and have Padmé concerned and all of that. And what better way to show a man becoming evil than being a jealous boyfriend. Isn't like Anakin has already murdered a lot of people, amirite. This is a bit of a problem with the simplification of a character. If they're bad or becoming evil, they also surely must be hyper jealous and possesive, there's no other way.

TO SUMMARIZE: I don't think Anakin was handled well, at all. Because the episodes were rellying on a very basic trope, which needed them to break the characters to fit the cookie cutter. However I can see some attempt at deepness there. It's like if it was the characters pretending to be more cartoonized version of themselves, if you know what I mean.

HOWEVER,,,,that said, the biggest sin for me isn't Anakin being OOC...IS HOW PADMÉ WAS TREATED.

They seriously had to put her into a sexual harassament plot, only for it all to be about how Anakin is evil (tm), and not have her respond at all? They really had her to put up with a creepy rapey dude just because.....What is even the narrative trying to tell us at all, that Anakin was actually was actually right, but overreacted? The plot is so contrived, Lmao.

She was the one that got harassed and yet she had no say on it, she's extremelly passive in the whole arc (which we all already know isn't Padmé's personality, even Anakin tends to follow the narrative in more passive way than she does). Then they also had to have her on the trope of "If a woman is going to be a spy, then she must use all her goods and being a femme fatale", and then they didn't even made her fatale. They could AT LEAST give us a moment of her reflecting about having been lowkey assaulted? No? Huh,okay.

Also, Padmé is actually very good at, let's say, handling Anakin. Or more like, reassuring him/discussing stuff with him, and I say this because of bits of the novels I have seen. She's more self-assured and confident, and experienced with social stuff, she's definitely not naive, and can stand her ground fairly easily, and she knew what type of guy was Clovis, so yeah, it's just...she was badly written here, she lost almost all of her agency. I'm not saying it was her fault or anything, or that it was her responsability to calm down her clown of a husband, but it goes against what we know Padmé is like.

Also apparently throwing himself onto the void was Clovis' apology for...almost getting her killed several times, kissing her without consent, being a creep and also using her as hostage. You know, so he's more of a deep character, I guess.

The good points for this arc though, are:

° Ol' Sheev doing what Sheev does best, and actually having some interesting stuff going on, they should've focused on that.

° They (miraculously) remembered a bit of Anakin's and Padmé's actual personalities, and when she told him to back off and that she needed a time, he accepted her desires to leave her alone and looked like a sad wet cat, like Anakin tends to look like. Also thank god they had Padmé's behaviour being nothing like the one of what you would expect from a victim of abusive relationships (Anakin was making his ooc scene and she just looked like 'bitch,what the hell has gotten into you', she had the audience's response, which is 'anakin? what?', which at least tells us this isn't Anakin's normal behaviour at all, i guess?)

° Obi-Wan and Anakin talking a little bit. Also Anakin's room had a poster of the Boonta's Eve race, he also had a little ship-toy, showing us that Luke really takes after his father, lol.

°...Idk what else to highlight from these episodes 😭😂 Did I already say Sheev's scheming? Uhhhh,well, uhh, idk, Padmé taking Clovis to the opera in an attempt to get info from him is kinda ...Ironic.

[a-star-that-burns-brightly]

CH2-12 thoughts (spoilers, I guess. You probably shouldn't be in the tag if you haven't finished the episode though.)

So! DRDT is officially back, and wow what a way to begin the rollercoaster we'll be put through the next few weeks. This episode was amazing, and I wanted to discuss my thoughts on it in a more detailed form. This episode gave us a lot of character moments that I want to at least mention, so let's get into it? Before we do though, I want to say that through these posts, I will be updating two things and showing them at the beginning and end First one being the swear statistics! It became a thing after my previous rewatch that every time a character swears, I count it, and I want to continue doing that for the rest of the series if I can so manage it.

^ current swear statistics as of CH2-11

And the second being...drumroll please!

My own personal DRDT CH2-Part 2 bingo card! If something on this list happens in CH2-Part 2, I'll check it off. Hopefully I can get a bingo or two in here, especially since, spoilers, two of the boxes have already been checked. But with all of that preamble out of the way, let's begin shall we? I’m going to cover the character moments we got in separate categories of the well…characters, rather than in order, for the sake of being concise.

Arturo

First and foremost, “Shut your whore mouth” made me scream at the top of my lungs. God I wish that was voiced. But more importantly, the thing about Arturo being very young for a plastic surgeon actually being addressed was not something I expected, especially so early. But I definitely appreciate the nuggets of Arturo backstory. Funny enough, his situation sounds very similar to Min’s in some regard, especially this line

(x) Arturo: I was only able to get this far in such a short amount of time because I specialized in plastic surgery, and nothing else. I neglected everything that wasn't immediately relevant to my goals.

This absolutely plays a factor into his relationship with his little sister. It more than likely was not just him leaving that made her commit suicide, but perhaps also years of neglect. And if she really felt like she couldn't live a life without Arturo in it, it's safe to say that their parents probably weren't the best either. The more I learn about Arturo and his homelife the more worried I am for him and especially his sister.

Veronika

Veronika didn't get much besides being her usual self, but I gave her a category because I wanted to point out two things One, Veronika calling Arturo cute. That just made me smile

And secondly, this line right here

(x) Veronika: Oh, and don't say something as boring as "I want to kill myself." I have no interest in such mundane reasons.

This is so fucked up and awful and gross and I absolutely love her for it. I just know she's going to get worse, I hope she does.

And also the fact that she apparently finds suicide to be inherently boring is very interesting, given the fact that she more than likely has the self-harm secret.

Whit

I know he didn't have much, if any major role in this episode but...listen I missed him. So much. You have actually zero idea how much I missed him and his goofiness... But also I can't believe that was the explanation for the dent in the computer lab that's been bugging me for months. Well played DT-Dev... (though the fact that Whit got away with breaking a rule solely because MonoTV thought it was funny is a bit fishy...it's almost like he's the MASTERMIND-- /hj)

We also in general got a lot of Charles and Whit moments, which I always like to see I don't think there's anything else to cover when it comes to Wh--

(x) David: Ugh! Goddamn it, Whit, does everything you say have to be made into some shitty dumb joke?! You're actually really fucking annoying! Shut the fuck up!!

...Well, when I said I wanted more Whitvid interactions I guess this can serve as a reward. ...guys dont worry this is how we can still wi--

Levi

...I mean, what else is there to say really?

No but actually I'll talk. This is what we've been theorizing for a year, and I actually had it in my predictions that Levi's secret was going to be the one revealed in this episode. But I did not expect it right at the end, nor did I expect it to be so sudden. And I don't think Levi has any reason to lie either, so I think this is his actual secret. Seeing him lose confidence and apologize for his unhelpfulness kind of stung to me, honestly. Levi has been trying to help the group since the very beginning, and that has only amplified since the start of Chapter 2. So seeing him...basically give up was very upsetting He is definitely going to be in the hot seat next week's episode and I am very excited for it, hopefully we get some insight on his past as well and...maybe a levi and nico interaction? please dt-dev? please? :>

Hu

FishyFried, as always, knocked it out of the fucking park with Hu's voice acting, and her monologue towards David was just as amazing...if not a bit terrifying, as it directly parallels with her hidden quote

I want to pay for what I’ve done. But even then, I still want to live.

I think I've said this before, but I adore David and Hu's dynamic and how both of them tackle the themes of change in their own ways, how both of them project onto the people around them to fulfill their own desires due to being stagnant in their own growth as people, it's so much fun, and I can't wait to see how this continues to develop in the later chapters I am sincerely a ch5victim!david + ch5killer!hu believer at the end of the day.

Teruko

Oh Teruko, quite a bit to discuss with you today.

For starters, her genuinely feeling embarrassed and upset upon realizing what she did wrong, apologizing for it, and (how I interpreted it anyway) beginning to realize that working alone and not accepting help from others is starting to bite her in the ass? That was not what I expected. I really did think that Teruko was going to get worse before she got better, but maybe she's improving a lot quicker than I thought (...let's hope she doesn't backslide again though, especially if the culprit is who I think it is) Also.

If I have to live with this knowledge, so the-fuck do you. And then there's her argument with David, which I already made a post about, but I want to add onto it by saying that the performances from Swords and LuucarIi here are absolutely phenomenal. One of my favorite voice acted scenes in the entire series. I have replayed Teruko's "Hah! Based on what?!" probably around 20 times and I will repeat it 20 times more because the delivery gives me actual chills. This fangan has such an amazing voice cast oh my god it's insane.

David

Oh. You are such a broken, broken man, and you are absolutely going to go down the Simon Laurent route. I actually don't have a lot to add when it comes to David's actual motivations for his actions, I think a lot of us theorized that he was trying to kill everyone and himself. But the main thing I want to talk about is the Xander shit because oh my god this man is Down Fucking Horrendous. I mentioned all the way back in this post that David idolizes Xander just as much as Xander idolizes him. What I didn't expect was for him to still be clinging onto the hope Xander gave him and trying to follow in his footsteps, and being borderline possessive over the damn dead man. Xander may have idolized David, but David is obsessed with Xander and what he represents to him. And he is willing to ruin his reputation, reliability, and dignity in pursuit of what he thinks is right. Not to mention, it puts the Tally5 image in a whole new light.

Though I still think these words apply to the very possible revolution that David, Xander, and Mai enacted towards Hope's Peak, a theory that has become even more credible after this episode, I also think these lines portray David's thought process during his actions in CH2-11 and his motivation for doing the things that he does. David calling Xander "the only good person he's ever known" is very, very telling when you consider what he personally thinks makes someone a bad person (lazy, useless, stupid). And that makes me upset. Xander and David's relationship will never not be absolutely fascinating to me. ...alSO DAVID APPARENTLY HAS MEMORIES FROM HOPE'S PEAK??? APPARENTLY??? Like am I reading that right or do I just have bad media literacy. How...How does he??? WHY does he??? Why did he say he didn't know who Xander was in the prologue???? I am very confused and I'm sure it will all be answered. Extra Thoughts !! - we got 7:30 AM confirmation, woohoo!! And the bonus of Arei swinging when she was first found was such a good detail and I’m surprised none of us noticed it, honestly. With that confirmation, that leaves basically everyone else (minus J, David, Veronika, Hu, and Nico) in the hot-seat. - the multitude of new sprites we got were so amazing, especially David's - Apparently everything that happened in the second half of CH2-11 was in the span of two hours?! Sheesh, the editing crew on the TV show must be working overtime. Hopefully they get a paycheck and its not just MonoTV who gets paid. - If I had any doubt in my brain that Eden was the culprit it has basically dissipated with this episode. I really do not know who else it could be other than her. three of the five main suspects other than her have basically been cleared up, either through alibi (J and Hu) or though plot (Levi) David and Nico are also cleared from suspicion Though there isn't really any plot or evidence reason to necessarily exclude Rose, given her moment in CH2-8 and, let's be honest, this murder being way too physically complicated for someone as lethargic as her to commit, I'm inclined to believe she is not And every other character has something that's clearly being set up to be further explored in Chapter 3 (Charles, Whit, Ace, Arturo, and Veronika) Like... even if you don't think Eden is the culprit, you can't deny that she's the odd one out here. I still think Accomplice!Levi is true, but I also truthfully think the culprit can't be anyone other than Eden - If I were to give one I-guess critique though, not just on this episode but on the trial as a whole, it's that we are four trial episodes in and there has been very, very little focus on the actual murder mystery itself. We have barely even covered 80% of the evidence. This isn't like, a huge problem for me specifically because I very much watch DRDT for the astounding character writing over the murder mysteries, and I definitely think that the lack of focus on the case is worth the amazing character moments we got in this episode. But I can see it really bothering some people, and there's a part of me that can't help but be a bit afraid that the actual solving of the murder case is going to hit the audience with a bunch of information at once and come across as a bit rushed due to the lack of focus it's had so far. I trust that DT-Dev is cooking though, and it'll probably be a lot more cohesive once we have the full trial to look through.

Predictions for CH2-13 - Like I said before, Levi is going to become the main suspect easily thanks to his secret reveal. I know Ace is going to be on his ass especially, because in his mind it would basically confirm the image he has already conjured up of Levi in his mind as a violent brute who is going to snap his neck any second. J is also going to jump to conclusions because that's just what she does, and she was already concerned about the murderer secret to begin with. - Furthermore, I think most of this episode is going to entail Teruko trying to disprove that Levi could've been the culprit. Considering the fact that there, well, isn't much evidence to suggest he didn't, maybe this episode will feature this chapter's Random Guess minigame. - I highly doubt we're getting an AM VS PM scrum debate now, but maybe we'll get one on whether or not Levi is the culprit? Maybe? - On the topic of trial minigames, I hope we get another nonstop debate, it's been like three episodes since we've had one lmao - Nico is either going to defend Levi, or reiterate the speech that J gave them in CH2-9. Either way, I hope this reveal causes them to interact it would be so interesting - We are on a track-record of having at least one person's secret exposed every trial episode. Considering the fact that Xander and Min are dead, and I do not think Teruko's secret will come out until the end of the chapter, that really only leaves Hu and Veronika...which is interesting, as they are both in the clear for being the culprit. Hu has already had multiple moments to shine in this trial, so I think its more likely that Veronika's secret will be the one getting revealed. How that happens, I am unsure. But I think Veronika will be the next person to have her secret revealed.

Conclusion Overall, I think this episode was amazing and a great way to kick off the end of the hiatus. I can already tell that these next few weeks are going to be a wild ride for us DRDT fans, but we're all in this together, so I think everything's going to be fine (nothing is going to be fine.)

UPDATED SWEAR STATISTICS: CH2-12

UPDATED BINGO CARD

[22ndnervousbreakdown]

Which social media would Sherlock Holmes characters have, according to a discussion I had with my friends in the middle of a night a couple days ago. This is ACD Holmes I think but leaning onto Soviet movies somewhat.

(And yes I'm aware telegram isn't popular outside of russian-speaking internet but just let it be part of the joke i guess)

Holmes: a lot of fake accounts on every website ever, but the only place that he actually posts on for himself is his telegram channel about tobacco varieties that has almost no followers. When Watson learned that Holmes has telegram, he was pissed because he thought Holmes is there to buy drugs.

Watson: he's a really popular ao3 writer. Also has a tumblr blog and an insta where he posts pictures of food, pictures of Holmes and sometimes his drawings (which he photographs with a lot of random stuff in the background for "aesthetics"). He also created a number of "official" Sherlock Holmes accounts without telling Holmes and makes all the posts there himself.

Mrs Hudson: facebook, where she posts recipes, household advices and stuff like that, and occasionally grumbles about Holmes and Watson. Also whenever they do something that really pisses her off, she would list the flat for rent, but always take it down shortly.

Moriarty: tumblr where he mostly posts about maths and a personal website to advertise as a private math tutor. Also a private telegram channel that Holmes somehow managed to follow from a fake acc.

Lestrade: EVERY social media ever. Most notably, twitter, where he always gets in fights (especially with Holmes's fake accs). He also set up an official Scotland Yard tiktok where he just makes really bad edits of policemen just walking somewhere with some music and lots of filters on.

Irene Adler: Instagram. Also onlyfans where she posts really rarely and she's always fully clothed, but she still has like thousands on thousands of followers there.

Mycroft: an official twitter that he hired someone to manage. Also facebook.

Mary Morstan: She doesn't actually exist, it's just one of Holmes's fake Instagram accs where he posted pictures of "Watson's wedding" to escape rumours.

Sir Henry Baskerville: onlyfans with only one subscriber whose username is infusoria666. Everyone but sir Henry himself knows it's Dr. Mortimer. Also Dr. Mortimer tried to set up a travel blog for him but ended up having to post there by himself.

Dr. Mortimer: tumblr blog full of skulls and also a youtube channel. He's also one of the few people who follow Holmes's tobacco telegram, and probably its biggest fan. When they met, he mentioned his youtube channel a lot, hoping that Holmes will ask for a link, but he just ignored even the most obvious hints.

Also:

Baker Street irregulars all have tiktok. They force Watson to watch skibidi toilets.

Lestrade writes with a lot of errors and uses emojis excessively.

Moriarty writes immaculately with all the capital letters and punctuation and periods in the end of every sentence. Holmes does the same but with no capital letters.

Holmes followed Irene Adler from one of his female fake accs. She in turn followed his tobacco channel from a male acc, and commented under one of his posts recommending him to follow a blog on autism.

Once Watson posted a photo of his lunch on his insta and after that a photo of Holmes with a caption "desert :)" and refused to delete it.

Holmes made a youtube channel about beekeeping when he retired.

[cultistradio]

my experience with roiz .

( as best i can remember )

warning for lesbiphobia , ableism , manipulation , transphobia ( ? ) , grooming / sexual harassment , potential faking of physical disorders , mental health struggles / episodes .

i first met roiz a few years back ! we didn’t really talk much , until later on that year . he became more active in my server due to our mutual interest in " melliot " musicals . he seemed nice at first . maybe a little off sometimes , but nice . though this quickly changed and i grew uncomfortable . i didn’t speak up at this time — due to fear of losing someone i had grown to borderline depend on in such a short timeframe . let it be known that i am not trying to one - up anybody else ; this is purely my experience with him . nor do i feel as though my experience was worse than the victims of his sexual grooming : it wasn’t . my heart goes to each and every one of his victims .

one of the main things that sticks out to me is the way roiz would treat me regarding my identity . he seemed to view me as a cisgender lesbian ? which confused me , as i am very much not . he would also constantly make lesbiphobic jokes towards me, such as putting lesbians on his official introduction post as a ' joke ' targeted at me . this was almost neverending and made me feel incredibly invalid and insecure in my identity and who i was as a person . i started to feel like i would never be more than the " token lesbian friend " to people due to the way he would act around me whenever i mentioned my orientation , and this eventually led to a horrible mental health spiral where i truly didn’t know who i was anymore , or if i was worthy of being known as anything other than ' the lesbian friend . ' he would also only ever address me using feminine terms , when i have always been open about using all terms . i wouldn’t mind feminine terms sometimes ! but it wasn’t sometimes , as he would never use any other form .

another thing that i remember about our friendship was the way he would treat me as a disabled person . to add context to this , i have a medically recognised joint disorder which causes mobility issues alongside other things . he would make comments such as " blud can’t run " unprovoked . he did this whilst we were referencing adamandi characters ; none of which have mobility issues . additionally , he would claim to have the same issues as me shortly after i talked about them — prior to me discussing them , he had never mentioned any form of physical disability . i won’t go into any more detail about this specific aspect of our friendship , as there’s not much else to state , as well as my own struggles remembering the situation .

most importantly of all : roiz was my friend whilst engaging in inappropriate sexual contact with an eleven year old . i never picked up on it despite it being extremely clear looking back , and i would have never befriended him had i known he was doing this ; i was manipulated into believing otherwise . roiz also claimed that this person had ' abandoned him ' after they temporarily broke contact , evoking a feeling of sympathy from me towards roiz that i really shouldn’t have felt at all . however , i did notice that he would initiate sexual or otherwise inappropriate conversations in a public server with exclusively minors . it later came out that the one on the receiving end of these conversations was , in fact , an eleven year old boy being groomed by roiz . this eleven year old was — as you may have figured out already — my good friend over at @\haowenyang , who also has a post about the situation . i recommend reading it as he is the true victim here , not me . you can find that post here .

that just about sums up my experience with this vile , sickening person . once again , i am not trying to claim that my situation was worse than those he sexually harassed and / or groomed . i do however feel it is important to get it out there . this may not be entirely accurate and there may be some gaps , as my memories of my friendship with roiz have become fuzzy and unclear . but i felt it was important to share either way . thank you for taking the time to read this .

[dingodad]

personally the vriska calling him a pedophile bit wasnt out of place for me. Canonically vriska doesnt shy away from saying that scratch is a sexual predator, she does state outright to his face that he gets off on manipulating little girls in the comic.

i think "would it be in character for vriska to say that" and "does it make sense in the context of the story for her to say that" are two subtly but crucially different questions, though.

like, on the one hand: it has always been textually clear that doc scratch is not LITERALLY a pedophile. he's a completely asexual organism. by using that word to describe him, you're making the subtextual textual. and this kind of "saying the quiet part out loud" is something the HICU have done very deliberately since they took the helm of hs2; they are intimately aware, i think, of the fact that they are fans in charge of deconstructing homestuck for the entertainment of other fans, and that in service of that aim sometimes you need to be willing to have mature discussions out in the open. a lot of the time this has worked for them quite well, especially in terms of getting old readers back on board with a story which has in the past been overly subtle to the point of excruciating boredom. but sometimes it teeters close to the edge of "characters talking like they're fully aware they're getting therapy", and i think this example leans somewhat toward the latter. like, is there really anyone reading hs2 at this point who doesn't already have some understanding that scratch is a predator? who exactly did it serve to make that already blatant comparison that much more overt?

on the other hand... i get the impression that vriska is actually aware of this distinction, on some level? like emphasising the fact that scratch is a child predator is almost a sort of shield for her. the name of vriska's game in this chapter is minimisation; while it's super cool and heroic to admit that part of your tragic backstory involves a sick spider monster and a badass lady pirate, by trying to paint scratch as nothing more than a pathetic kiddy fiddler what she's really saying is that because he never actually molested her then she was never really abused, that she was never really a victim and therefore he was never actually a significant presence in her life at all. that's how she lives with it, by role playing as the predator to forget the fact that she was ever prey.

i think what i question about this is possibly that vriska would even know to use that word at all? writing dialogue that actually feels authentically like stuff trolls would say is another thing i think hs2 has had a rough time with ("that is a completely normal human sentence"?). the gay joke in the tavros chapter was funny because it had been a long time since we heard caliborn and jake do the same gag but it feels like they tried to capture that same energy with vriska calling tavros a "pussy" in this chapter and it fell flat. and it felt just as unnatural for a troll to say the word "pussy" as it did for her to say the word "pedophile". i think what makes alternia and its traumatic knock-on effects so effective is that it's often more insidious than it is explicit; trolls barely have the language to describe all the institutionalised neglect and abuse that is happening around them all the time because to them it's just how the world works! yeah sollux has that line about sex offenders and schools, but i think that basically serves to illustrate my point, because for the most part we all seem to understand that trolls don't have what we would be able to identify as "school" either: sexual abuse and education are concepts that, in the world of homestuck, exist entirely in the abstract; tropes to be evoked but not things that ever actually happen.

that being said, alternia is designed to reflect the structure of homestuck as a whole, and the reason alternia doesn't have sex offenders or schools is because homestuck in general does not explicitly concern itself with these topics. we understand that escaping homestuck and settling down on Earth C means settling down in the "real world", replacing the threat of time-travelling demons with real struggles and real problems, and as a continuation of the homestuck epilogues hs2 naturally IS going to continue to touch on sex and politics and all the other stuff that was delegated mostly to the subtextual in the original comic. i think the structure of this chapter even kind of alludes to this; tavros and erisol beckon vriska to relax for a moment and play childish games with them like she used to do when she was a kid on alternia, but by choosing to forge on ahead with her personal growth vriska is immediately confronted with the fact that becoming an adult is NOT like a webcomic, it's NOT all allegories and RPG battles; it can be sick and it can be hurtful and it can stop you right in your tracks just as you thought you were "making progress" toward "winning".

i just feel that by having vriska apply Earth C vocabulary to an Alternian experience right off the bat, we've skipped over a key part of her transition from homestuck to the real world. would this chapter have been any easier to stomach if it had been about vriska coming to grips with the fact that scratch was a predator in the first place? no, of course not LOL. i think my gripe here might literally just be with the word choice. like i believe the writers have it in them to express what they were trying to express here in a much more interesting way than simply having vriska say "lol he's a pedophile". yes, addressing something literally that has only ever been mentioned before in symbols and whispers is part of the impact of this update, but i don't think that has to come at the expense of the dialogue actually feeling like it belongs in the mouths of these characters

[kitmarlowe]

hey hope it's okay to ask but i'd like to know ur takes about the simon says episode of inside no 9 being about male fandom in particular? cause ive always enjoyed that ep and how it read some fandoms for filth lol but in my experience fandom is pretty female dominated so i'd be really interested in hearing about the specifically male side of it

sure. this probably would be more coherent if i'd rewatched the ep to remember things properly, so we're relying on my brain.

this is just my experience of viewing the difference between male and female fans (if we can understand these are generalisations and there's often crossover), so it’s likely this does not apply to all fandoms, but HERE WE GO.

to start, despite what I’m saying, simon is absolutely an amalgamation of a lot of things in fandom, both male and female. I expect much of it has come from mark’s experience on sherlock (shipping in particular). his worst traits come from all sides, but I don’t think it would work as well as an episode if it was about a female fan. his actions absolutely stem from the male side of fandom.

female fans, on the whole, seem perfectly happy just discussing the material with other fans. they form little groups and friendships, sharing jokes, discussion, art, fanfic. the men absolutely do this too but there’s an interesting difference in the way it happens. I don’t see men refer to their writing as fanfic, because fanfic is a female-dominated area and it has a reputation outside of fan spaces for being frivolous, out of character, and full of sexual fantasies about the male characters. male fans seem to view themselves as above it and need to legitimise their work. they’ll make short films, publish the their fanfic as short stories, interpretations, bonus episodes - anything to separate it from ‘lesser’ works. in the episode, when spencer dismisses gavin’s work as fan fiction, simon is clearly hurt by it and says, “well, no, it’s more sophisticated than that.” even though it absolutely is fanfic. men don’t want to be lumped in with the women because they view themselves as serious creatives, not obsessive fans. (all fanfic is creative, never change.) the men are also obsessive, they just don’t want to be viewed that way.

simon clearly sees himself as above other fans. he thinks running a podcast legitimises him and puts him on a level with spencer rather than the fandom he’s doing this for. he’s a content creator. the podcast is for the fans, I don’t think he views it as just a fan podcast. this is a kind of superiority I’ve seen in the male side of fandom. running a podcast validates them and brings them closer to the original material and makes their views, in their eyes, more intellectual. they, to paraphrase simon himself, actually know their stuff in a way that other fans do not. and if they can get a creator on, well… they’re a bridge between the two. they become part of it. simon believes he’s deserving of a co-writing credit, he thinks he deserves to be in the episode because he has risen above the other fans. he is a creator, just like spencer.

while most male fans I’ve seen manage to remember that they are just fans, they’re also more likely to seek the approval of the creatives. not just a “glad you like it” but a mark of recognition, for them to almost say, “yes, you are like me.” while they’re not awful like simon, they still have that same need to be seen as more legitimate, sophisticated and intellectual than what the common fan is viewed to be. I don’t think the women care as much about that. male fans need people to know that they understand the material on a deeper level — they need the creatives to know that.

simon feels entitled to the ninth circle because of the time he’s invested in it, he believes his view counts as if he’s in the writers' room with spencer, even before he blackmails him into the real thing. so do other male fans I’ve seen. I don’t think they’d ever quite go to the extent that simon does, but they’re certainly further down that path than female fans are.

and that’s why it had to be a male fan in this episode. look at doctor who — all three modern showrunners are men from fan spaces (as is mark himself). you know there were women from the same era who were writing their own stories, within their own communities, but isn’t it interesting how they didn’t become ‘legitimised’ through work on the show? what is big finish if not fan fiction legitimised?

and to end: all sides of fandom can be toxic (and they've touched on several areas in this episode) but it is also more often just an absolute blast. gavin's speech is in there for a reason, to recognise the good side. so whilst it sounds like I’m being negative towards the male fans, they're also a big part of that.

[nabi-unveiled]

Nabi Notices (Mar 26, 2025)

Yesterday was incredibly busy so this was delayed a day, but that's ok. I'm sure it will happen from time to time. This week has prompted me to think a lot about head canons. Particularly, the different reasons people make them and what makes it fun (or not fun) for people.

For me, I create most of my head canons when my brain gets stuck. I use them to fill in narrative gaps, close out narrative threads, make sense of things, or explain things that I noticed but were never discussed (like tattoos). It's not so much about "fun" for me (although I do have a LOT of fun making them), it's because I can't get my brain to move forward otherwise. I also make them when I just wanted more to the story (like Fadel/Style wedding head canon). When the writing is really strong, the characters are well-developed, and I felt like I got strong resolution - then I don't make them. I have very few head canons for some of my favorite shows - they gave me everything I needed on their own. That said - I'll read any fanfiction people want to offer even on those 😂.

The Things I Noticed This Week:

Fabulous Fit

I was predicting Pai from Flirt Milk would take the "fit" win this week (as he almost always delivers one outfit I love), but then Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist gave me another character this week to watch for style. I particularly enjoyed this sweater:

I love a good cardigan/sweater. It's why I enjoyed Phu's wardrobe so much in The Boy Next World. The hearts are upside down, but I'm going to say that's because Sant hasn't figured out what his heart wants yet. I was also pretty sure it was the same sweater Phu wore (in a different color scheme), and @dribs-and-drabbles confirmed it was. I think I like this yellow version best.

Fascinating Find

I went on a lot of deep dives this week, but many of them weren't prompted by a particular show. They were prompted by @iguessitsjustme. Thanks to one of their comments, I got to learn A LOT about spoon theory.

And now I'm busy assessing all of my characters with that in mind. Obviously Da-on from Secret Relationships was tired and stressed. He could not have had that many spoons. I've decided that explains a lot of his puzzling actions. It's officially added to my head canon now.

Fantastic Frame

Perfect 10 Liners isn't a show that comes to mind when I think "amazing visuals". They don't really play around a lot with light and most of the framing is very straightforward. There's nothing "amazing" about this frame, but this is the visual that is stuck in my head this week.

It was the furthest apart Faifa and Wine had ever been on this rooftop. Wine hitting his knees as he couldn't find Faifa, and Faifa who was distressed himself and could've stayed hidden choosing to expose himself. I can make up a reason for Faifa being in the light here, but it's not a clear visual story. But for some reason, I REALLY liked it. There was distance, but it was momentary and dealt with by BOTH people taking action. So yeah, probably more due to the narrative than the frame itself. But this is my favorite visual of the week.

Fun Fluorish

I had almost given up on My Golden Blood during Episode 1. I wasn't sure I'd even put it on as a background watch. But I'm glad I did, because my man Tong threw GARLIC BREAD at a vampire. 🤣

It was an excellent touch of comedy in a show that needs comedy to make it work. I still don't know that I'll always watch it. I'm not vibing yet, but I haven't counted it out.

Favorite Fragment

My favorite dialogue this week came from the finale of Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo.

It was a close contest with some of the dialogue in When Live Gives You Tangerines. However, this line just felt like something I'd say in a variety of situations. It's really similar in some ways to the quote on my blog header. I've already used this line once this week as a joke response to my daughter and once in a post. I'm going to have to be careful not to overuse this screenshot.

My Queue for the Coming Week:

Well, true to form I didn't stick to my list last week. I went off the rails and watched a bunch of other stuff 😅, because I wanted comfort shows this past week. So here's the "I probably will watch it" list for this week. The bolded one(s) are the only one(s) I KNOW for certain I will watch.

Perfect 10 Liners (Ep 23)

Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist (Ep 2)

Top Form

Love for Love's Sake (Ep 1)

Make Up With Mud (Ep 4)

When Life Gives You Tangerines (Ep 2)

Anything else is up to whim and fancy.

[slowcatsisland]

Love your thoughts on Zoro 💯😍. How about dating & sexuality of Sanji? Is this pervert maybe still a virgin? 😅 I love this boy. 🐻

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Black Leg Sanji; Ability to Date, Sexuality, & Trauma Responses (ft. Kamabakka Kingdom & Germa 66)

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Oooh I was waiting for this one!!

As always, this is my interpretation of Sanji’s character so take my opinion with a grain of salt lol

We’ll discuss Sanji’s trauma and how this makes him view men and women, my take on his sexuality, if him having a partner is plausible within the canon right now, and his most popular ships.

••

I’ve always thought about how his interactions with women and men in the show almost always have the same tone

Ykwim? He is always treating the ladies kindly, offering them warmth, food, protection, and a smile.

He always treats the men harshly, always being curt with them, acting disinterested and annoyed at what they say with his teeth bared.

And I don’t really know how aware Sanji is to his initial behavior and how much they vary between man and woman.

Do you ever just instinctively get annoyed when that one person tries to talk to you? No matter what they say bitterness seeps out of your tone when you respond to them and you can’t help but ridicule whatever they said regardless if it needs any scrutinizing or not?

And it’s not like you’re doing on purpose, it just flows through your body like rain.

That’s what I think Sanji feels towards men whenever he interacts with them.

He only ever doesn’t really act standoff ish to Usopp and sometimes Luffy.

This all stems from his childhood. From the beatings he took from his brothers, from the snare in their smiles as they spoke the most hurtful things to him when he couldn’t do anything to defend himself. From the way Judge- from the way adults(adult men/the soldiers of germa 66) never tried to help him.

It all stems from his childhood. From the soft tones that the maids would use with him when he would visit his mother, from the gentleness of the lady cooks who let him stay in the kitchen when he asked (even though they technically couldn’t refuse). From the way his sister was always the one to patch him up and how she never laid a hand on him. From the way his mother would praise him just for being kind and would stroke his hair so lightly.

This bias that Sanji developed is so deeply ingrained in him.

••

This bias leads me to my next section, what’s Sanji’s sexuality?

I really think he’s bi. But it’s complicated.

He rejects key parts of himself all the time.

He rejects his natural femininity - always wearing a traditional masculine suit, always smoking a cigarette, having a rumbly, more manly voice (TRUST i believe his voice is actually a lot higher pitched but the cigarettes and his own training to get rid of his French accent dulls it down- IN FRENCH HE SPEAKS HIGH PITCHED AHHHH)

He rejects his need for outside help to cope with his trauma - he has not once that I truly remember outside of Onigashima against his ‘battle’ with Black Maria has ever asked for help. He tries to handle things on his own not to burden those he’s around no matter how much he’s hurting and needs someone.

He rejects the fondness he could potentially have for a man - the only way I could explain this is like, internalized homophobia??

I will expand more on this when I get to his Zosan ship with Zoro. But it’s also from the way he is scared of men. Because men have only ever hurt him. It’s this wall that he’s built so high he can’t grasp the concept of outwardly loving another male.

His conditions in Germa 66 changed his perception of how acceptable it would be to love a guy. Guys scare him, no guy would be accepted by Germa 66 as well. They would think that’s a joke, that one of the princes could love his own gender. It isn’t a welcoming environment for queer tendencies nor people (cough cough Sanji)

- Sanji was made from his mother’s love, and he was the only one out of his siblings made to love. He was meant to love the world, to love others, that’s who Sanji is deep down.

Sanji doesn’t really seem to like that idea, he rejects it. It’s so much easier for him to love women.

Sanji himself would probably tell you that he’s straight and only likes girls. It’s easier, it’s traditional, it’s safer. And he does like girls. He likes them sexually, he likes them physically and emotionally (ish on emotional lowkey lowkey). He also likes the idea of loving a woman. It’s ‘right’- for him to love a woman.

Yk?? He could imagine himself fighting for and protecting a woman, baking her food, snuggling with her at night, worshipping her hips in the lust filled hours of dusk.

I don’t think he could imagine all that with a man.

And that’s okay, in a way. He’s a tormented babe.

THIS IS WHY KAMABAKKA KINGDOM WAS SO IMPORTANT FOR SANJI IN MY OPINION. (GUYSSSS)

It probably wasn’t Kuma’s intention. But Sanji being exposed and exiled to a queer island for two whole years had to have healed his inner troubles in some capacity.

There aren’t social norms, no traditional role to play in Kamabakka Kingdom. It’s just..people. Unapologetic, true natured people.

It’s what a healthy society looks like- at least to me. It’s crazy how I feel like I perceive queer communities in media to be the perfect place of self acceptance because all normal social roles/gender roles/and modest constrictions are just not there? (Example: I could kiss a girl I’ve been wanting to without having that itching voice in the back of my head go ‘your friends would make fun of you for that, you’ll be looked at differently if you do that’ or ‘this doesn’t look right, it would look better if you were a guy or she were a guy’ LIKE?! There’s a line that is crossed in traditional communities that just aren’t in queer communities when it comes to expressing yourself I feel like 🧍‍♀️)

It’s so freeing to be yourself the way that you define it and I so hope that is what Sanji experienced during his time there.

He was surrounded by drag queens who fully embraced themselves. They knew they liked men, they were okay with it. They knew they liked to dress feminine, they were okay with it. They knew they were strong and could fight, they were okay with it.

Hmm I don’t think I’m really articulating how it was important to him in a -accepting yourself is healthy and you’re not disappointing anybody- way and not a -go kiss this guy that dresses as a gal you’ll love it here wear this dress so you fit in with us you secret freak- kind way

Yk??

Anyway -

I feel like he’s bisexual with a heavy lean towards women. This comes from his upbringing in Germa 66 because it changed his view on men but deep down I feel like he still has the capability of loving a man- just in different way he would love a woman.

It’ll always be a different way.

Sanji himself would tell you he’s straight.

If this were an au untraumatized Sanji, he would be regular bi without a preference imo.

••

I headcanon him as still being a virgin in the One Piece story right now. There’s not much logic behind it. More of a feeling.

His trauma almost prohibits him from getting to close to a woman imo, I think he would freak out and have to back out of such an intimate act.

It would also probably have to be someone that Sanji knows well, I don’t see him hooking up with someone that is more a stranger or acquaintance than friend or loved one.

I do think that he has successfully wooed women during his time at the Baratie, but he never ended up sharing more than a few kisses with one or two of them and maybe a rare blowjob or fingering session before something happened.

I do think that sex is something he wants. I think Sanji is a character that wants to devote himself to something real that he can touch. Like a person. Though again with the whole perception thing- he couldn’t see himself being sexual with another man. And that’s okay- love comes in other forms of intimacy, we’ll talk abt this in his Zosan part soon too.

OMG a creator on this app - onlymurphy- has really good Sanji fanfics that cover his need for intimacy, how his trauma causes him to crave physical closeness, how he always strives to please/pleasure his partner, and they do a really good job at conveying the depth of his character so def check them out too if you haven’t before

••

Would Sanji have a partner in the story anytime soon? Nah. But- I do think he is someone that needs or would benefit greatly from a partner.

A partner would help him through his issues. He could heal so well if he had someone there for him that loved him in a way no one else could. A way that no one else has.

He’s a hopeless romantic imo, he puts relationships on a pedestal. For him to have that for his own is something so special yk?

However I still do think that he needs to change his bias towards both men and women before he gets a partner.

••

This leads me to my next point, my preferences in Sanji’s partner.

I want him to have someone that doesn’t suit his biases so badly!! Someone that challenges him to face the fact not all people fit into his preconceived notions about them.

Ugh

Like. Have him with a masculine woman, someone who isn’t dainty, someone who doesn’t want all his sugar coated assertions of affection, praise, and admiration. Someone who doesn’t want his snacks that he made for her just because he thought she might be hungry even though everyone else on the crew I’d probably just as hungry yk?

Have him with a woman that’s a genuine fighter. Not someone who learned to fight to survive in the sense that Robin is a fighter. Someone more like Vi from Arcane that settles things with her fists. A woman that’s up front and center during the battles with the other members of the monster trio. Yk??

Have him with a woman with rough, ugly scars. Better yet, facial scars. A woman that would be unattractive by normal social standards. We both know he’ll still find her beautiful, but it’s about the fact that others won’t. That’s she’s different.

Have him with a woman that’s a little morally grey. Maybe she’s closed off and rough around the edges to everyone, even him. She kills people, she hurts people, but she’s still good. Ish. People aren’t one thing, everyone is a little bit of everything. (Idk if this one is as big of a deal as the others listed above imo he’s the type of guy to go ‘I support women’s wrongs/women do no wrongs/what murdahh?? Ykwim?)

Men

Have Sanji with a man that’s more feminine coded. Something that almost gives him flashbacks to Kamabakka Kingdom. A guy that’s just pretty, there’s no other word to describe him. He’s handsome ish yeah, but he’s not really hot or sexy even if he is-he’s mostly pretty. This guy could have feminine coded hobbies too. He doesn’t have to be a fighter, he could be more of a lover. He could be a painter- someone who sculpts and makes creations out of color and draws emotion out of a blank canvas.

Have him with a guy that’s very emotional too. Maybe more emotionally aware? He would sit Sanji down for a discussion about their relationship because he knows damn well Sanji won’t.

Maybe a guy that is deadly and masculine and all the other things that scare Sanji. But to Sanji, around Sanji, with Sanji, he’s soft. Sanji could never provoke such violence and cruelty because he can’t eve imagine doing things like that to someone like Sanji. (Zosan lowkey lowkey lowkey)

Regardless of my wish for him to fall in love with someone outside of his normal biased preference, Sanji’s partner needs to be someone gentle and kind to him. He needs someone to give him grace, give him a safe spot.

••

Okay, last bit of this post- Sanji’s popular ships. (Zoro, Usopp, Luffy, Nami, Pudding, Viola)

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Zoro: yes, but in a specific way.

I mentioned this in my Zoro post with Zoro’s ability to date, but Zosan is something more spiritual you could say.

I don’t see it begin sexual, I don’t think they would ever have feelings for each other like that. Sorry, no Zosan kisses from over here ☝️

They have a companionship that is deep and neither of them dare think about it because they don’t know what the other thinks about it nor how it could affect the Straw Hats. They’re like two sides of the same coin. They belong to each other but in the same breath they can’t stand to let the other know that they are dependent on them.

They’re complicated but that’s how they’re supposed to be.

They’re not supposed to be traditional in any sense of the word, at least not to me.

Maybe their relationship could be something deeper if Sanji ever talked to Zoro about it, but it’s highly unlikely.

Zosan is also where Sanji’s internalized homophobia comes in to play imo. Sanji would never admit to anyone, especially not Zoro, that he might feel some type of way about him that’s not negative. It doesn’t seem right to Sanji, and he probably despises the tightness in his chest he gets around Zoro. He also probably can’t discern whether it’s from a threat or from fond feelings.

Sanji would also imo always try to take how he feels when he looks at Zoro and how he looks at a woman and tell himself that the ladder is appropriate and is actual ‘love’ (ish)

Zosan is baked in layers of angst for me too, I don’t ever see Zosan as something cutesy. It just can’t be, not with how the way they are. It can be funny, duh, but not all happy and cute. There’s always gonna be complicated and abrupt and dangerous feelings with them.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Usopp: I didn’t know this was a genuine ship until recently. I think they’re better as close friends.

Sanji and Usopp understand each other really well.

Sanji was always the one to back Usopp up first and it showed a lot in pretimeskip when they had more shown interactions.

Usopp knows that feeling of being weak, not enough, unworthy, of being a burden. Just like Sanji does.

So I do understand why some people shop them together, but they work better as a duo.

I might actually prefer them as a duo over Zoro and Sanji as a duo.

Usopp and Sanji is what Zosan shippers sometimes make Zosan out to be. Something cutesy and fluffy- something it’s not.

(Aka pls make fluffy Sanuso content I need-)

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Luffy: I think they work something like Zolu works but to a lesser degree.

Luffy is Sanji’s savior in a way. He gave him the road to the All Blue. He showed him not all men will hurt you. He let Sanji be his cook and put so much love and trust into Sanji on behalf of the crew.

Which is why their fight on Whole Cake Island is so, so sad. It was their own breakup. Sanji never wanted to leave, he never wanted to hurt Luffy nor the crew, he wanted to keep them save at the expense of his own life, hands, and freedom.

Sanji’s loyalty to Luffy is tragic because it comes from a place of Sanji feeling unworthy of Luffy’s generosity too.

Ugh

I don’t see them sexually, I don’t see them romantically, all though I could see Sanji potentially like loving Luffy in a romantic way. But that specific form of love wouldn’t be reciprocated by Luffy yk? Idk it’s hard to explain.

They’re precious and they’re a true bond, but not in a traditional way.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Ace: hmm. I never knew this was a genuine ship either.

I mean, nothings like wrong with it

I just don’t see it yk?

They had limited interaction, even if it was good interactions.

Ace is dead..

Idk how they would feel given their relationship with Luffy, like Sanji with his captain’s older brother and Ace with his little brother’s cook.

It feels like an overstep for them to do that to Luffy?

I don’t see Sanji developing feelings, and I think Ace was being his charming usual self. lol they’re both charming guys with suave personas I just realized

So yeah, it’s a no for me. I don’t see this in a shop in any way but if they had more time maybe a duo? But their affiliations to delegate pirate crews also is a big deal so

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Nami: quick disclaimer, I don’t ship Sanji with any women in One Piece. I don’t think Sanami works and this is mainly on Nami’s part.

Nami imo, is what Sanji’s like perfect woman is. She’s beautiful, she’s funny, she’s smart, she’s a little flirty at times, she’s independent but still kinda relies on others, she’s seen the horrors of the world but didn’t let that change her, she is someone who would rather have someone else fight her battles for her.

I’m not saying Sanji doesn’t like Nami for who she is, but I think he likes the idea of her more than her and the idea of being with her more than she would actually like being with her.

But Nami just can’t reciprocate his feelings. I don’t really ship her with anyone, which does play a part in me saying this fyi. I feel like she might be asexual, or at the very least she doesn’t prioritize romance over her duties yk?

Given her childhood I think this makes sense. She’s constipated. In a way. Ykwim??

So, they don’t work for me. They’re a gag. They need to stop being a gag too especially since Oda’s rewritten Sanji’s behavior towards women as something more lustful and predatory. Sigh

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Pudding: NO. guys. No.

They’re not for me, they never will be. Lemme explain

Pudding is a minor, Sanji is an adult.

It was a pressured situation- arranged marriage in the first place. Nothing except the last moments from when Sanji saw her third eye up until he left Whole Cake Island was organic- and all the organicness was on Pudding’s side.

Pudding is a victim of her mother and she needs to heal from that before she has a partner imo.

Pudding said awful things about Sanji in the scene when she captured Rejiu too. That broke him for a good while. And Pudding can’t change what she said despite her change in feelings.

I also think her change in feelings towards Sanji is more of a trauma response to. Because he accepts her. And no one else really does nor has. It isn’t real imo. It’s kinda like Boa’s love for Luffy, it’s just not totally right imo.

Pudding isn’t a member of the Strawhats, and I don’t see any of the Strawhats, especially not Sanji that would want to be with his lover 25/8 being in a relationship with someone that isn’t a Strawhat. Yk? It’s a breach in loyalty to the crew as well.

I actually really like Pudding’s character but I don’t think she should have a love interest. I understand her catching feelings for Sanji but I respected her a lot when she shoved them down to put her priority of stopping Big Mom’s hunger pains, her duty as the minister of chocolate, and her responsibility as one of Big Mom’s children first. Yk?

They just don’t work in my opinion, I don’t want them to work either. But they’re good character foils and they represent some of the same stuff which is really interesting to me.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji x Viola: I also didn’t realize this was a genuine ship either lol.

Idk, I just don’t feel anything about it.

I don’t think they are a serious ship or pair because of a couple things.

Sanji fell in love with her body and faux behavior first. Which is something I don’t like seeing in Sanji’s potential love interests.

Viola was using him for the majority of their time together. And no hate to her, she just didn’t have any genuine feelings and I don’t think she ever gained them either.

Viola also has a duty to her people of Dressrosa, something she fought to regain for 13 years. She wouldn’t give that up for a man, a pirate.

They have different loyalties and paths in life

I don’t think Sanji’s feelings for Viola were ever real either. He just ‘saw the good’ in her.

I also don’t think I realized how close he was to like. Running off with her? Which weirded me out when he had to make himself reflect on his actions before deciding to help his crew.

So like.

They’re mid imo. They never had a chance, nor any solid footing as a ship at all.

Not saying they weren’t a little cute for like the half day they spent together but then again, they had different wants out of that.

Sanji also was more into the idea of her imo.

Yeah.. anyway

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sanji has more minor female love interests like sprinkled around but none of them are serious yk? They’re more to show how his perception of women is challenged throughout the One Piece world

(Cosette, Ossan mainly speaking)

I’d write a little piece for Sanji x Robin but guys, don’t be silly there’s nothing for that ship and if u ship it live ur life brother don’t let me stop you

Mwah 😽