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val-made-a-mistake · 3 years ago

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i am in desperate need of some loki fluff 😫😖 what if loki keeps messing with and pranking thor just because he knows it makes the reader laugh and he would do anything to see her smile 🥺

YES

trigger warning for angst (particularly grief), fluff, snakes, and mentions of rats, i should really start putting trigger warnings on these lists just like i do for my full fics but i keep forgetting, i’m sorry

right so building off of this list of headcanons bc i’m too lazy to come up with something else, you’re teenage florist!reader, obviously a lot older than when you first met loki, your relationship is established, but you’re still in asgard

it’s been a lot since your mom passed, y’know? grief is a lot. when you look back on that time, all you can think of is being cold. like you were bathing in liquid nitrogen

you weren’t technically aware of it but you isolated yourself from loki and stopped visiting the royal palace

it’s a paradox. you can’t be around loki or thor bc you feel this indescribable weight when you’re around them, almost like guilt but worse, and you can’t be at the shop anymore bc it’s where you grew up and everything reminds you of her, so where do you go?

both the little apartment and the shop are yours now. you knew this would eventually happen, but not so soon

you still have to keep business flowing so you still order stuff for the incoming summer and try to be there as much as you can, but you’re definitely not there as much as you should be

your evening walks are twice as long now. the town girls talk about you behind your back, they say you walk the length of the valley

resist the hamilton reference

and loki? loki hates seeing you like this

loki said he doesn’t enjoy hurting ppl in the first episode of his series but let’s be real, he also doesn’t enjoy seeing the ppl he loves hurt like this

BUT HE WILL NEVER ADMIT IT

every time thor brings it up loki tells him to get out of his room lmao

mewling quim

it’s probably bc he’ll never admit it that he has a bit of trouble trying to find ways to cheer his loved ones up bc for some reason all he can (selfishly) think of is his reputation as the god of mischief

but for you? he’s going to try hard

he comes round the shop one day just before you’re about to leave for your walk and asks if you wanna come up to the palace

unsurprisingly, you say no

loki grins at you tho

“wanna see what i’ve got?”

you narrow your eyes, this can’t be good

“what do you have?”

he straight up procures a snake from midair

“i was thinking we go up to the castle, put it on thor’s bed, see how long it takes him to notice.”

you’re trying not to seem scared of the snake. “is it venomous?”

“of course.”

you narrow your eyes. “thor loves snakes though.”

“it’ll make it even funnier, i promise.”

“my idea of funny doesn’t involve dressing snake bites, loki,” you say, and although it’s not stern, it’s also not light hearted either. “i have an order of fiddle leaf figs coming in soon, i have to be here to receive it. maybe some other time, okay?”

loki starts to smile a little, getting hopeful again, but you correct yourself before thor’s health and safety can be compromised. “we’re not getting venomous snakes to bite thor, ever.”

i stg this practically grown man pouts at you

i picture you’re like seventeen in this btw

but he magics the snake away, thankfully

and leaves bc he’s tryna respect ur boundaries

after that he just starts suggesting pranks to you

“what if when thor goes for his morning shower, i make an illusion where the floor is swarming in rats?”

“absolutely not.”

“what if i pretend i’m odin and disown him from the family?”

“that’s not even funny.”

“what if i push him off the bifrost bridge, just for fun?”

“i have a feeling you might throw me under the bus when frigga finds out.”

it’s gotten to the point where thor half knows what loki’s trying to do and he wants to cheer you up as well

but he does, like, you know, actually human things with you

he comes to your village one day and accompanies you on your evening walk, and he gets you to talk about all the cool wildflowers that line the road the farther you walk

he actually ignores the swooning fangirls for once and insists on taking you out for ice cream

and it’s nice, you suppose, you genuinely appreciate him, but the happiness isn’t really substantial enough that you start feeling good about your life again

one day you actually confess to thor how sad you’re feeling and everything, like, how really fucking sad you are, you’re not even sure why you telling him this instead of loki. you know loki means well but he’s actually making you feel worse yknow

and thor, not exactly understanding but dumbly trying his best anyway, listens

and he pulls you into a tight one-armed hug when you feel your vision blur

thor, son of odin, god of thunder, fearsome warrior, future king of asgard, man that makes all the town girls swoon, is actually a really good hugger

does he run home and tell loki everything? yes

“lady y/n is perhaps more upset than we realized, we have to do something!” he cries, not even bothering to keep his voice down bc he notoriously sucks at whispering

“you think i haven’t been doing anything?” loki hisses back, preparing to stab him for the 859723th time

“what would cheer her up, do you know?”

and it’s then that thor and loki decide to form a truce literally just so they can see you smile again

they invite you over to the castle one day and they stage the grandest prank in history, which is…

uhhhh i don’t actually know, use your imagination

but by the end of it??? do you know what you’re doing?????

you can’t even feel it happening, but you’re beaming like an idiot

and when i say a tide of relief floods loki

you start cackling like a witch

“odin’s beard, what was that?”

VICTORYYYYYY thor wants to shout

unfortunately one of the royals calls thor away for something and this leaves you and loki alone

you’re still laughing lmao

“my love, i thought i would never see you happy again,” loki says, and he thinks of it as a risk but he pulls out the sappiness bc you’re finally happy goddammit

“what’s that supposed to mean?” you choke out through giggles, and he steps forward to take your hands in his

“i thought you would avoid me forever,” he says, half seriously, half teasingly.

“i wasn’t avoiding you!” you exclaim, going to tug your hands away from him, but loki hangs on

“then why wouldn’t you talk to me all throughout these past weeks?” he asks you.

this makes you stop and stare, wide eyed, and loki isn’t really sure what to say so he stares back

and it’s the same face hes been looking into for five years now but somehow it’s even more beautiful in that moment

“i didn’t want to contaminate something so good,” you reply softly, cryptically.

it’s a bit of a selfish move, but loki’s eyebrows raise teasingly. “you think i’m good?”

“i think you’re a dolt, loki odinson!” you snap back bc you haven’t forgotten about what he and thor just did, but you’re grinning again.

loki frees one of his hands and cups your face.

“you are the good in me, my love,” he says softly. “the only thing i want is for you to be happy.”

I KNOW IM THE NARRATOR BUT IM LIKE THIS CLOSE TO BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL JUST SO SOMEONE CAN HEAR ME SCREAMING DJFLFJSOSJ

you raise your eyebrow. “the only thing i want is for you to stop terrorizing thor.”

loki raises his eyebrow right back, and his voice is even lower as he says, “but what if it makes you-”

you grip him by the nape of his neck and pull him down onto your lips.

loki smiles into the kiss

#loki #loki one shot #loki oneshot #loki fluff #loki x you #loki x y/n #loki x reader #loki series #we watched the sunset over the castle on the hill <3

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pub-lius · 3 years ago

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ACTUALLY Hardcore Facts About Alexander Hamilton

Alright, take two.

I've already typed this entire thing out once, so this is likely going to be a lot more lazy than anything else I will ever post, so :).

Sources: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow; John Laurens and the American Revolution by Gregory D. Massy; The Federalist by Alexander Hamilton; George Washington's Indispensible Men by Authur S. Lefkowitz; Lafayette by Harlow Giles Unger; Who Was Alexander Hamilton? by Pam Pollack and Meg Belviso

Hamilton wished for a war when he was like a baby. So if you know Hamilton, you know that one line where Hamilton says "As a kid of the Carribean, I wished for a war, I knew that I was poor, I knew it was the only way to rISE UP-" in Right Hand Man. Well, that line is based off of a letter Hamilton sent to his childhood bestie, Edward Stevens: "...Ned, my ambition is [so] prevalent that I... would willingly risk my life, tho' not my character, to exalt my station... I'm no philosopher, you see, and may be jus[t]ly said to build castles in the air... I shall conclude by saying I wish there was a war. Alex. Hamilton." Okay, dude, calm down, you're like two years old. I think he was actually like 14-16, but for dramatic purposes we'll say he was an actual infant (do I sound like Chernow?). But I hate how much this letter foreshadows. It's like he jinxed himself, its almost embarrassing.

Hamilton ran a business at 14. Now if you've ever been fourteen and you were like "i think i feel like running a business" literally shut up no one asked. I think this is impressive. When Hamilton was at least 14, the guys the owned Beekman and Cruger (it had a different name by this time but this one sounds cooler) just dipped and left Hamilton in charge. This was actually a pretty good decision, since Hamilton managed it well. There was also this one time where Hamilton told a whole captain of a ship who didn't perform up to standard, "Reflect continually on the unfortunate voyage you have just made and endeavor to make up for the considerable loss therefrom accruing to your owners." This man was so arrogant I wish I had his confidence. Yeah that was cool ig, but if I met teenage-Hamilton, I'd literally hate him.

Hamilton saved the president of his college. Ever the dramatic, Hamilton had a thing for suppressing mobs (though he was pretty much never successful). There was this one time at King's College where a mob formed to "talk" with the president of the university, Dr. Myles Cooper (by "talk" i mean make him into a tory bird). And, according to Who Was Alexander Hamilton? (this book gives me so much joy), "Alexander vowed to protect him [aww]... He stood up to the crowd, telling them that violence would only hurt their cause. He couldn't stop the crowd, but he delayed them long enough for Dr. Myles Cooper to escape in his nightgown," (Pollack and Belviso 27-29). This is a really sweet description of it, but Hamilton was probably calling the mob a bunch of insults and stuff, judging by how he later handled riots. Also, Cooper thought Hamilton was rallying the mob, so he was a complete jerk to Hamilton, but rightfully. Everyone, bully Hamilton. He's short and dead like an idiot.

Hamilton was really cool on the battlefield, don't @ me. Now, despite being a clumsy little gremlin and an absolute dork, Hamilton was a pretty good leader, and I guess veterans deserve to be recognized for their victories or whatever. At the battle of Princeton, one of my favorites, Hamilton had very big, cool guns, and did some cool stuff. "Returning to the final phase of the battle of Princeton, British infantry took refuge inside Nassau Hall, the building that housed the College of New Jersey. American artillery commanded by Capt. Alexander Hamilton [ya boy] was brought to bear on the college building... Washington was on the scene and noticed this young artillery officer who skillfully commanded his gun battery. The general would soon invite Hamilton to become one of his aides-de-camp," (Lefkowitz 92). Wow so cool moving on to Yorktown.

When the Americans were building their fortifications, two British fortifications were in the way. So rude. Consequently, Washington sent The Gay Trio, Lafayette, Laurens, and Hamilton, to uh, silence them. Hamilton pulled off a successful sneak attack, and won the battle swiftly, leading to the American victory in the battle of Yorktown, and therefore the war. "...Colonel Hamilton['s] well known talents and gallantry were on this occasion most conspicuous and serviceable. Our obligations to him, to Colonel Gimat [stan], to Colonel Laurens, and to each and all the officers are above expression..." -Major General Marquis de Lafayette. Lafayette is so nice I would marry him if he was alive and single and legal and not old as hell. Like omg he gave credit to everyone but himself that's so nice I'm such a simp for Lafayette. Anyway, Hamilton was cool too ig.

Hamilton caused the evacuation of Philadelphia like an iDIOT. So, after Brandywine (British victory), Washington sent Hamilton on a foraging mission in Vally Forge to get flour, horseshoes, and tomahawks (not quite as exciting as Yorktown). Well, our clumsy ginger rat got caught, and wrote to the president of Congress, John Hancock, "If Congress have not yet left Philadelphia, they ought to do it immediately without fail, for the enemy have the means of throwing a party [party rockers in the house tonight] this night into the city. I have just now crossed the valley-ford [Valley Forge], in doing which a party of the enemy came down & fired upon us."

Surprise, this turned out not to be the entire goddamn British army, it was just a few scouts sooo... let's just say Philadelphia wasn't happy. "Our Removal from Philad. Was owning to information that General Howe was crossing Schuylkill [River]... However tho' this Intelligence was from one of the General's family (Alexander Hamilton) it was not well founded & we wish we had not left Philad.," -James Duane. Yeeeaaahhh, that's awkward. Not the best way to get your name known in the capital, I must say.

Hamilton was possibly bisexual, and this is hardcore because I say so. Now, I'll add more quotes to this later, but basically heres my interpretation of the historical evidence and whatnot. Basically, Hamilton was a really closed off, cynical guy, since like everyone he ever loved died or left him pretty much, and he wasn't really the type to make and keep close friends; "...how little dependence is to be placed on treaties, which have no other sanction than the obligations of good faith, and which oppose general considerations of peace and justice to the impulse of any immediate interest or passion," (Federalist 64); It is a known fact in human nature, that its affections are commonly weak in proportion to the distance or diffusiveness of the object," (Federalist 73). Um, Mr. Hamilton? You're projecting your trauma on the government again.

Also, despite working with him for like twenty years, Hamilton really never got close to Washington, like at all. He even said to Laurens, "I have no friendship for him and have professed none," in regards to Washington, which is kind of mean. But he ALSO told Laurens:

"Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships, I wish, my dear Laurens, it m[ight] be in my power by action rather than words [to] convince you that I love you. I shall only tell you that till you bade us adieu, I hardly knew the value you had taught my heart to set upon you. Indeed, my friend, it was not well done. You know the opinion I entertain of mankind and how much it is my desire to preserve myself free from particular attachments and to keep my happiness independent of the caprice of others. You s[hould] not have taken advantage of my sensibility to ste[al] into my affections without my consent."

*mocking Hamilton* its YOUR fault that i love you and it was RUDE that you FORCED me to love you how DARE you you SUCK i love you uwu.

Also, at the top of that letter, someone mysterious (probably Hamilton's son) wrote, "I must not publish the whole of this," and Massey still thinks Hamilton was straight.

But yeah, that's about it. I had originally written more at the beginning, but I unfortunately lost the original draft, so I'll just settle for this. I hope you enjoyed, though, and maybe learned something or found a quote you needed or something. I did more research than I wanted to in one sitting for this, so appreciate it or I'll cry. Thanks love you <3

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thespoonisvictory · 3 years ago

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Hamilton Hot Take: A Hamilton that kept in the deleted songs and workshop versions tell a superior story (So Broadway vs Off-Broadway version). And, no, I’m not just talking about Congratulations (although that one should’ve also been kept).

A significant part of Hamilton’s narrative focuses on the relationship between Burr and Hamilton. From the beginning, their ideologies and the way they get ahead are completely different. Burr keeps his true opinions and thoughts close to his chest. He never reveals anymore than what will make him most agreeable to others. His persona is one of inoffensively likable. Hamilton is quite the opposite. He is never indecisive, always shooting off his own opinions. He takes risks in order to grab at better opportunities, but often this leads him to gathering more enemies. And despite these differences, Hamilton and Burr remain good friends who have a lot of mutual respect (and envy) of one another.

Until the second act that is. And the second act is also unfortunately where things start getting cut and rewritten.

As the dsmp fandom would put it, Broadway A. Hamilton is made “smooth” compared to his original counterpart. He’s much calmer and more reasonable. He’s pride and short temper have been stripped away. And Burr, in comparison, is stripped of much of his more sympathetic traits. Aside from Dear Theodosisa (Reprise) and really any mention of his family being entirely cut, he’s made to be far more malicious and villainous in other songs, compared to their original lyrics.

Take for example, Schuyler Defeated. Both versions start on Eliza and Philip finding out about Eliza’s father being challenged for his seat in the senate. In the Broadway version, Eliza is very unconcerned with this development and she and Philip leave the song as quickly as they entered, happy to go and meet the new senator. The original, in contrast, starts out with a panicked Eliza, desperate to find Alexander because she knows exactly how he’ll take this. Hamilton’s characterization also vastly changes depending on the version. Broadway Hamilton is very calm, innocently asking about Burr’s change in party affiliation. Meanwhile, og Hamilton comes out swinging, already furious, he demands to know when Burr changed parties. Hamilton is far more personally offended in this version, framing Burr running against Schuyler as an attempt to “make a fool of [him],” compared to to the Broadway version where he seems more offended on behalf of his father-in-law. The only thing that stops Hamilton from doing anything stupid for what is essentially just running for senate AND not the personal attack Hamilton views it as, is Eliza and, later in the deleted song “Let It Go,” Washington talking him down from it.

Another example is the Broadway vs original versions of “Your Obedient Servant.” The Broadway version is undoubtedly framed in a deeply negative light. He is furious, unable to understand Hamilton’s support of Jefferson, viewing it as an attempt to keep him from winning, as something done to spite Burr specifically. Meanwhile, the original Burr is more calm in level headed in explaining his feelings. In both versions, Burd makes accusations towards Hamilton. In the original, he backs up his claims with a source in the form of a private letter sent in confidant, while Broadway Burr makes accusations of Hamilton calling him “amoral [and] a dangerous disgrace,” which is never said by Hamilton anywhere and has no basis. This combined with Burr already suggestion they can name a time and place I’d they have a disagreement, makes Burr come across as far more petty and eager to start a fight. Faced with accusation with no basis, Broadway Hamilton responds fairly reasonably, saying he would need to sight a specific source for him to be able to disavow those words, and provides his own list of disagreements with. Original Hamilton, however, is very flippant of the accusations, being incredibly petulant in denying Burr’s accusations, mocking the wording of them. And yes, while both Burr’s escalate the conversations to threats, the Hamilton’s responses show just how different these versions. Broadway Hamilton stands by what he says and defending himself by saying that everything he said is true and that Burr stands for nothing. Which is completely true, so Burr then challenging Hamilton to a duel makes Burr seem unreasonable and angry that Hamilton pointed out how his own ideology screwed him over. While original Hamilton makes the whole disagreement incredibly personal, for no reason, bringing up Burr’s dead wife to mock him. It’s only then that Burr challenges Hamilton to a duel, to which Hamilton agrees to almost immediately, showing how rash the original Hamilton is, compared to the Broadway version who thinks the challenge over for a few seconds before agreeing.

And finally, “Ten Things, One Things,” really shows how far their friendship and understanding of each other has fallen off. Burr’s perspective shows how much he wants Hamilton to apologize and back down from the duel, only realizing at the 8th count that this is a serious duel, and Hamilton won’t be backing down. Meanwhile Hamilton goes into the duel considering the possibility they might die, but as the counting continues he becomes more and more convinced he and Burr will survive. He is specifically is assured of this by realizing it’s not in Burr’s political interests to kill him. While Hamilton scrutizes the area, Burr’s own fear and paranoia takes hold, convinced Hamilton will shoot, Burr resolves to kill Hamilton first, so his daughter will not orphaned. All the while, is so assured of his safety that he starts to think about going to back to his house to see Eliza awaken. Neither one of them are able to fathom the possibility of the other outside of the image they’ve created of each other. Hamilton cannot see a Burr that wouldn’t wait, and Burr cannot see a Hamilton who would throw away his shot.

Far more emphasize is placed on Hamilton’s violent anger in the original, while in the Broadway version this is lost and Burr is pained more as the unreasonable instigator in their deteriorating friendship, when the original makes it so much more complicated than that. Broadway is so much more Black and White in the story it tells, where the villain Burr shoots our hero Hamilton, rather than the far more interesting story of a friendship between two men based on mutual respect, admiration, and envy and how that friendship ultimately changed both until they could no longer understand each other and how that inability to see how the other had changed, led to their ultimate falling out in the form of final duel.

I’m not saying the workshop versions of songs are better musically (I know jack shit about music) but they make Hamilton’s characterization and relationship with Burr so much richer and that’s why the story they tell is so much better to me.

TLDR; Hamilton is less of bitch in the Broadway version and it makes me >:(

I hope this makes sense, I started to ramble

^^^

god damn this is so good idk what to do with this other than nod and tell you to run my blog for me

also- this reminds me of what happened to off broadway orpheus vs live broadway orpheos, bc ob!orpheus is a self confident bitch who was charismatic and funny and I like him so much, and b!orpheus is a awkward little rat creature who doesn't make as much sense both as a character and in the narrative. he got smoothed

#asks #spoon talks musicals #I could talk a lot about the orpheus comparison

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halfthealphabet · 3 years ago

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@greygullhaven and @lawlessferalgay tagged me both but on different blogs lol so here it is

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

50,094 (I write a lot of short fics lol)

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

9 fandoms (ish). Kingkiller Chronicle (27), Haven (16), and then one or two for Hamilton (both crossover), Leverage (also a crossover), Cloak ad Dagger, a retelling of Bluebeard, Red, White, and Royal Blue, and Legacies.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A recount of Rio fro Red, White, and Royal Blue, where Alex and Henry tell their friends what happened in Rio when they first met. Very funny and I frequently forget I write it lol.

You can break my heart from Cloak and Dagger, a to all the boys au I never finished and have very few comments on oops.

kiss me too fiercely, hold me too tight from Haven, an alternate scene in Fear and Loathing if Duke had offered to hook up with Nathan instead of rando girls.

Old Friends from Kingkiller Chronicle for Kote and Tempi, a ship I have very little investment in and is super super short but people love it??

an eventful morning from Haven, smut for the threegulls and it's light and fluffy and a little funny.

5. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

a lot of my kkc fic gets super angsty cause there is a lot of like, character analysis in fic form, but There's a part I can't tell takes the cake and I cried writing it. it's about denna and her patron and domestic abuse. it was stuck in my head and I had to get it out. (but also wow there is a lot of angst in my fics???? @ me please explain).

6. What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'm partial to A life without you is empty, even tho I don't care about Timeless at all anymore, it had the part in the ending that was important to me, which is Lucy saving Amy because sisters are important, okay? But Good Morning from kkc is also super sweet because sim and fela are my darlings.

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

yes, kingkilller chronicle and leverage, as well as kingkiller chronicle and hamilton. yes, I do have a problem, thank you for noticing. one day, I'll write a kkc and haven crossover, I'm sure

8. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I shock myself by saying yes to this, not even fics with smut, just straight up smut. as to what kind? i have no clue.

9. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

usually, unless I get super distracted, it just feels kind.

10. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

not yet, but I write for unpopular fandoms so *shrug*

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not as far as I know

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, never gotten around to it. tried to once but it fell through in high school

14. What's your all time favourite ship?

Parker x Hardison (Leverage) (I do enjoy the ot3, but Parker and Hardison have my heart), Tandy x Tyrone (Cloak and Dagger), and Audrey x Nathan x Duke (Haven) (they are addictive)

15. What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

. . . I have several *hides behind table*

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have been told when I write for kkc, I sound like pat rothfuss, which like, WHOA. like, more than once, and that's an amazing compliment to me. I'm trying to carry that style over to other fandoms, but I usually prefer writing dialogue heavy with little description, or actively describing someone's feelings and nothing else for like two solid pages.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

describing setting is a huge one but whatever lol

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

only French if @logarithmicpanda has approved it (I have heard them talk so much about terrible translations in published books, I would not be comfortable doing it), but I probably wouldn't tbh. there has been no need so far.

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

before I published fic online, Stargirl in grade school and Half Resurrection Blues in college were both fics I handed in for grades lol. the first one was from Cinnamon the rat's pov and the second was Carlos going to therapy cause I think I'm funny. on ao3, kingkiller chronicle.

20. What's your favourite fic you've written?

hm. I really am not sure. maybe Blue and Red

tagging @nbvethbrenatto @coat-the-boneless @iamtheholyghost @bisexualshakespeare @cookiedoughmeagain @serendipityxxi and idk anyone else who sees this and wants to!!

#this was fun!!!#tag game

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moosoobi · 4 years ago

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Confessions

In the night: Chapter 2

T.Jeff- Hamilton: the musical

Y/N can’t hold all her secrets. She’s tired of hiding. The people deserve the truth. Here’s her confession: the one she should’ve told us long ago

I started to write this chapter the day after I finished chapter 1, yet before the first chapter was even published (time management queen). As I’m typing this message, I’m currently distracting myself from finals LMAO. Anyway, I wanted to finish this chapter as soon as possible to give some explanation of the events in the previous chapter, so I hope I do exactly that. I’m still manifesting that I articulate through this story smoothly, please give me feedback <3

MC (aka Y/N’s) POV

Modern au

Word Count: 5.4k

A few unrealistic realities, but I’m working with what I got

This chapter will most likely answer many questions about chapter 1

THIS CHAPTER OCCURS AT THE SAME TIME AS CHAPTER 1! all events in this chapter line up with the events of chapter 1

Disclaimers:

TW: violence, abuse, mentions of blood, themes of injury, itty bitty angst?

photo not mine <3

If you have any questions/concerns about this story, DONT BE SHY TO ASK ME! This is my first time writing a whole series, so I apologize if the plot gets confusing.

-Now Playing: Broken Clocks by SZA-

Where to start…

My attention was taken from Professor Washington’s lecture the moment I felt a pair of eyes attempting to pierce a hole in the back of my head. As I look back, I realize that it’s no one other than Thomas Jefferson, the spoiled francophile, or so people like the whisper, but gossip’s not my thing.

Upon being called out by Professor Washington, I couldn’t hold in my giggle as Thomas’s head ducks down in embarrassment. I suppose he sure knows how to lighten the demeanor in the lecture hall; It was a nice excuse to take my eyes off of Washington’s low-quality power-point presentation, but I appreciate that the man is trying.

This class feels like it’ll last forever, and I contemplate if I could just perish in my seat at this very instant, yet Thomas’s presence seems to make it worthwhile. I don’t know him that much, or maybe at all for that matter, but since he’s been seen with a Schuyler, the locals around here can’t seem to keep their mouths shut about him.

From what I’ve heard, he’s another silver-spoon raised boy representing Virginia up here in New York. A few scholarships here and there, as well as a trip to France for a semester. I don’t see what all the fuss is about; He seems like a pretty cool person, probably has an exciting life, and isn’t throwing away his shot. It’s odd, even with parents to piggyback off of, Thomas is very similar to a certain orphan I know.

“Class is dismissed” Is all I heard from Professor Washington’s mouth before that obnoxious but relieving bell sounds off.

Desperate to get out of this class, I hurry to put my stationery items into my burgundy-magenta backpack. You’d think after those turbulent years of high school that college would motivate me for fancier bags, but I can’t say no to my favorite color. It’s simple, won’t bring attention to my presence, unlike every other decision I’ve made in my life.

After I finally finished packing up, I can’t wait to take a breath of the fresh, polluted air of New York City. I quickly spotted my roommate's car within the crowd of vehicles next to the sidewalk. He’s on time, as always, to pick me up from class, and I’m grateful that he sacrifices his time for me, but it’s not like he had a choice. I toss my bag into the trunk, surely crinkling a few important papers. Upon reaching the door of his expensive car, my roommate greets me with joy to see me.

“How was class, Cherie?”

Lafayette, my roommate, shoots a smile at me, his white teeth are almost blinding, but he always says I’m exaggerating.

“Boring as always, but I’m still here, sadly” I say as I hop into the front seat of Lafayette’s car. He pouts in my direction

“Ahh, c’mon, don’t be like that.” Once he acknowledges the buckling of my seatbelt, he begins to power up the car. “C’est la vie, Y/N” I roll my eyes, my hatred for him grows just a little more every time he says that.

“Can we get McDonald’s?” I attempt to change the subject, earning a small chuckle from him. He prepares to drive off “You know I can't say no to you and your American junk food”

And so we begin to drive off

Lafayette and I indeed have a bit of history together. After I got mistakenly involved with Alexander and his clique, Lafayette was the next best (or worse) person to walk into my life. He’s sweet, charming, probably all the things Americans are not; the gentleman hails from France. Yet he’s so much more than that.

Ever since I caught his eye at that obnoxious high school party, he and I hit the ground running. Disclosing the events which took place in his-

our bedroom won’t solve the problem, but the stubble on his jaw and the way he holds the steering wheel with one hand nearing my thigh reminds me of the unresolved sexual tension between the both of us.

I’ve only been living in his apartment for a few months, an idea he proposed when I mentioned my dreadful rent. A nice view, nice coffee maker, and nice bedsheets were more than enough to convince me, but I know there’s more to that “nice” list that I shouldn’t disclose.

Though I know his intentions were good, I’m sure he invited me into his abode to protect me from Alex.

Since I began to band with Alex and his gang, Alexander’s been strict about getting me home on time. It wasn’t only because I was a helpless high school student, but also to prevent me from ratting him and his group out to the authorities.

Upon joining Alex's posse, a strict curfew has been placed on me, only to ensure I stay safe at night, or perhaps to make sure I don’t betray them.

Moving in with Lafayette made following this time limitation easier for me, especially since he volunteers to drive me home or takes a stand for me. If the unfortunate event of my arrival past my ‘bedtime’ timer occurs, Alexander ensures I pay the price.

Speaking of arrivals, Lafayette passes me a box of hot, salty fries and a smile spreads across my face. His eyes visibly soften as my entire demeanor changes.

“Have I ever told you that you’re the best person ever?” I spilled my thoughts while stuffing my mouth with fries. He lightly chuckles, watching me.

“Maybe a couple of times..” He prepares to drive off again “...too many times, actually.” he shot a wink at me.

Blood didn’t have any time to rush to my cheeks before I could slap the side of his shoulder, causing him to whine in discomfort. I sigh before returning my focus to the steaming fries in front of me. The tension grows, and so does the silence between us. Eager to break the tension, I propose an idea.

“Let’s go home?” we turn to each other at the same time

“Oui.”

---

I enter Professor Washington’s lecture hall and my attention is driven to the two curly-headed Virginians. I watch in secondhand embarrassment as Thomas Jefferson and his friend playfully argue in front of the entire class, seemingly a heated debate of the greatness of Mac and Cheese. One argues on behalf of the gooey pasta, while the other simultaneously retorts with a mix of “you’re so stupid” and “God help me”.

Feeling a rush of confidence and suaveness, my brain urges my body to intervene in their conversation. Maybe it was to make new friends, or perhaps to stop the class from staring at their dumb dispute, but I swiftly walk over to them. The next few words to come out of my mouth fell into place oh-so-perfectly.

“Hey, can I sit here?”

Upon sitting in between the two Virginians, they introduce themselves. The calmer, self-collected man among the two introduced himself as James Madison, while the bolder, upbeat man introduced himself as no other than Thomas Jefferson. Both of them seemed happy that I interrupted and decided to reach out to them, maybe one was a tad more excited than the other.

And ever since then, Professor Washington can’t seem to split up our trio. From childish jokes and a few inappropriate inferences, Thomas and James make great company. The idiotic smile that spreads across Thomas’s face whenever he’s capable of making James and I break our silence during class would become more annoying than Lafayette saying “C’est la vie” whenever I make a poor life decision.

Nevertheless, Thomas and James dangerously remind me of Alexander and his goons. The abundant amount of self-praise and cocky remarks said by both Thomas and Alexander is almost astronomical. In the case of Thomas and Alexander’s meeting, I’m sure they’d be the best of friends. But likewise, I could also envision the two attempting to tear each other's heads off, the chaotic clashing of two powerful minds.

They always know what to say and when to say it. I’ve never met anyone as clever as Thomas and James, and they’re even worse when they’re together.

“‘ ‘s Adams here today? Washington told me to turn in my papers t’ him.” Thomas whispers as he eases into his chair, Washington’s booming voice seems to become background noise to us

“Is he ever?” I reply, attempting not to giggle at my own response “I haven’t seen him since Washington initially introduced him to the class.”

“Maybe he’s jus’ sick or somethin’. Kinda reminds me of you, James'' His head of curls turns to stare down James, in which James replies by rolling his eyes

“He can stay home, he does the same amount of work there anyways.” James cleverly retorted.

And that seemed to be our last straw before bursting out in laughter. Thomas’s body flung forward as he laughed his head off, James ducking his head to hide his glee behind his laptop, and I quickly slap a hand over my mouth to prevent anyone around us from drawing suspicion. But apparently, Washington wasn’t having our disguises.

“Can the three of you even tell me what I just said?” Washington turns around from the board to scan the crowd, his eagle eyes find us quickly

The silence was all we could emit, and soon enough, He turned back to his lesson. I sigh with relief; the last thing I need is to get kicked out of a class I don’t even pay for.

…

...

“Washington sure got a shiny ass head. D’you think he uses shampoo and conditioner?” Whispered Thomas as he leans over to me

And just like that, we’re faced with the same struggle all over again.

—-

Lafayette adjusted the hot pan, erupting a few sizzles. The wall clock ticked, the hour arm froze pointing to the “11” written in roman numerals. Lafayette and I decided to agree on a home-cooked meal, and although it’s too late for an average dinner, yet too early to be defined as a midnight snack, I’m sure Lafayette’s cooking will satisfy me for the night.

“Y/NN, would you prefer salt on your omelet? Or did you decide to be healthy tonight?” He said holding a salt shaker in the air to steal my focus from the swirling red liquid in my glass.

My head lifts to meet his eyes. I tilt my head, the wine causing me to ponder for a little longer than I should’ve. He continues to stare at me, holding in a laugh, before I force myself to nod.

“Yeah.. a little won’t hurt” I hear him chuckle at my drunken dialect, but I know the French man isn’t about to lecture me about English “Your wish is my command.”

I watch as he conducts the kitchen perfectly. He knows where everything is, exactly what to add into the sizzling pan, maybe even the exact second to take the meal off the flame.

“I thought you weren’t a fan of monarchy?” the sarcasm was evident in my tone “but I appreciate the submission” I shot him a playful wink, to which he responds with a pompous smirk

A few sips of wine later, I recognize notification that has been staring back at me for hours.

1 Message from Thomas

A text from Thomas? And I’m barely seeing this now? I silently scold myself for giving into the wine before opening the message.

“Thomas: Hey this is Thomas from class, wanna come study with us at the library sometime?”

My eyes become glued to my phone. It was certainly necessary for me to reread Thomas’s text, I was unsure if the alcohol was beginning to make me see odd things, but I assured myself I was correct.

I could feel the blush spread across my face. Maybe it’s just the wine taking control, or maybe it’s the butterflies in my stomach forming every time I reread his message. A harmless invite, perhaps evoked from Thomas due to James stroking his ego, but I know James’ wouldn’t promote such a bold, straight-forward message. Though Thomas is known for his meticulous confidence and certainty, a message this simple could be notably deceiving.

But a little socializing won’t damage my self-respect. “Be bold, Y/N” is what I used to tell myself at the beginning of the semester, and what do I have to lose? I begin to type my reply.

“Y/N: yeah I’m down :) just send a time and place and I’ll be on my way”

Sent.

My introspection was soon interrupted by the screeching plate being slid in my direction by Lafayette, the steam circulating the meal

“Y/N, Mangeons.” My head comes up from my phone, my eyes meet his eyes momentarily.

“Thanks, Laf.” I reply before taking a fork from him and digging into the steaming meal ahead of me. Lafayette’s cooking never disappoints. Ever.

My body couldn’t help but pick up my phone every few minutes to respond to Thomas’s messages, Though they were just the details of the hangout-offer he previously proposed, I felt enclosed in my little bubble while texting him. Those few moments of interaction with him somehow made my day better. I’m sure even Lafayette could see my radiating energy, but I’m not sure how he took it.

We’re technically not a couple; a few hookups and moving in together don't make us an official couple, right?

“Merci, Laffy.” I watched as he visibly cringed at my poor attempt at french. “Let’s just stick to our mother tongues, angel.” He retorted. I laughed it off, yet inside his reply left a scratch on my pride.

---

Another class of absolute foolery and childish inferences, and I can’t help but laugh as Thomas, James, and I exit the lecture hall. The New-York cold hits us harshly, but being about a month into this semester, students already know what to expect.

It was indeed embarrassing, running to Lafayette’s car to remind him of your library study session.

“Alright, I’ll pick you up before your curfew, okay?” He asked with one hand on the wheel. His faux-leather jacket contorting around his toned arms made it difficult not to remember the moments they shared around midnight. The imagery of their candle-lit room appearing in her head as he sat at the wheel stopped her from replying for a moment.

“Y-Yeah sounds great. You’re the best, you know that?” She thanked him for sacrificing his time to make sure she arrives home on time.

“You remind me all the time.” He sneaks in a small wink between his sentences “I’ll see you tonight, Cherie”

Y/N smiled before turning around to prance over to her friends. Y/N heard the faint sounds of Lafayette driving off, sighing in relief

After briefly explaining my situation to the boys, we quickly head over to the library.

A woman in a coral-pink blazer and pants set is waiting impatiently at a table she rented out just for us. “What in the world took you guys so long?” She pressured for an answer

“C’mon Angie, that wasn’t even ten minutes.” Thomas rolled his eyes before removing his backpack and opening a chair for Y/N. Real smooth, Thomas, I can’t lie. He looked over to me, seeing stars in my eyes as I realize I’m standing next to the oldest Schuyler.

“You’re-” She interrupted me with a smile, sticking out her hand to shake mine

“Angelica Schuyler. And you?” I swear her name sounds familiar. I’m sure I’ve heard it around but I just can't place it. I do see her on my social media feed from time to time, and I must admit, she looks even more heavenly in person.

“Y/N L/N.” My hand meets hers in a firm handshake.

“Nice to meet you.”

—-

At first, I thought nothing of it.

Though Lafayette’s text at 7:30 (on the dot) did push me out of my zone, I did appreciate his promise to me.

Thomas on the other hand seemed disturbed by my sudden leave, but it’s not like he’d understand. Alexander would literally kill me if I were home late.

But Thomas and I would continue to hang out. His evening texts would slowly become a weekly routine. Whether it was a scary movie or an ice cream date for just the two of us, he always found a way to spend time with me.

“Don’t tell me that mint chocolate chip is actually your favorite flavor, darlin’.” He adjusted his position on the park bench and raised an eyebrow, his gaze focused on the green ice cream atop my ice cream cone “You might make me regret takin’ you out tonight” he chuckled and I couldn’t help but smile

“You know you love me” I jokingly retorted, scooping part of my ice cream with my tongue, and relaxing against the bench.

It’s very rare to get to relax like this. Not only am I a fully-fledged college student, but also one of Alexander’s goons. The weekends are merely just ‘weekdays: the sequel’, but add forbidden literature and alcohol to that equation.

I look back up to Thomas, seeing his disgusted face. “Wait.. are you actually against mint chocolate chip ice cream?” I cocked an eyebrow towards him

He shrugged before chuckling “I recall telling you of my unfortunate arguments while visiting England..”

“..so what does mint chocolate chip ice cream have to do with your political upheavals in a foreign country?”

He smirked in an ‘all knowing’ manner. “Well, Darlin, if you did your research—“

“—You’ve got to be kidding me—“I start to wonder why I even asked

“—you’d learn that the monstrosity in your ice cream cone, mint chocolate chip, originated in England.” He completed his statement with triumph “Ever since my disagreements in England, I swore to despise such a concoction until the day I die.”

I looked at him like he was crazy. “I can’t believe you did your research on English creations. You’re so dramatic sometimes” I respond

“Hey, I wouldn’t be a Jefferson if I wasn’t.” He stared back to his cone, the mesmerizing ice cream almost reflecting himself back at him.

We shared silence for a moment. Words were unnecessary when we were together.

“I suppose..” Jefferson started “...I might be able to tolerate mint chocolate chip ice cream, but only for you, though.” He turned towards my direction

My eyes soon met his. “Well, I’m honored to be your exemption, Jefferson.” I smile with triumph, recognizing my effect on him.

He swiftly takes my hand, his skin feels burning compared to mine. Our eyes remain connected as he dips his head down to kiss the back of my hand. I attempt to hide the fact that my heart stopped beating for a moment, but the breath hitching in my throat wouldn’t help me at all.

“Let’s drop the formalities, Darlin, you can call me Thomas now.” My hand remained between his. I try my best to keep my hand still, wanting to marinate in this moment forever.

A new feeling courses through my body. Something unfamiliar. Perhaps it’s the charm of a Southern Gentleman. Maybe the feeling of being treated right for the first time, something I’ve never experienced from anyone.

What have I ever done to deserve this chivalrous kindness?

‘What a gentleman’ I repeat to myself in my mind. What makes him so different from the others?

From a simple kiss, I suddenly crave more.

More than the unresolved sexual tension between Lafayette and I.

More than I was ever granted the opportunity to.

Maybe ‘more’ is what I deserve.

My mind bleeds with the thought of Lafayette, but Thomas seems like he has so much more to offer. What if I do deserve to be happy? I may not have earned it, but who gets to declare my right to happiness? I was once happy with Lafayette, but the times have changed

He’s just not him. He’s just not Thomas.

---

But no matter how much I enjoyed spending time with Jefferson himself, I was always the first one to leave. I had to.

I remember the way his smile would fall at the sound of Lafayette’s car horn.

The way his jaw tenses whenever my phone vibrates across the table

Whenever Lafayette came to pick me up, I also can’t help but feel a part of my soul crack within me.

“I’ll see you this weekend?” He kisses the back of my hand once more in an attempt to savor this moment, continuing to maintain eye contact.

“I’ll try, Thomas. Not sure if I’m busy.” I sigh with fatigue. “But I’ll let you know.”

“Alright. Get home safe, darlin’” I hear him stand from the park bench as I wander to Lafayette’s car, his eyes following my figure.

I hop into Lafayette’s car before taking one last glance in Thomas’s direction, watching as his figure begins to walk in the opposite direction that our car was heading.

“Ahh, Y/N. Don’t tell me you’re cheating on me” his sarcastic tone wouldn’t pierce deep enough.

I speak without thinking. “I do recall you claiming that you and I were never a couple, remember Laf?” My change in demeanor was certain to shut him up. And he did.

He’s just not him. He’s just not Thomas.

I remained turned away from Lafayette as we drove through the city. The memories built between Lafayette and I constantly falls like a house of cards, but I prefer to avoid the subject.

Lafayette felt otherwise, yet respected my choice.

He was the first to speak.

“Alexander needs me for a transport this weekend.” He stated, “I’m not sure when I’ll get back, so it’s very important that you get back from whatever plans you have before your curfew.” He takes a glance over to me and briefly meets my eyes

“Don’t test the waters, Y/N.”

Ah yes, the monthly literature transportation of Alexander’s gang.

The Notorious Sons of Liberty.

A popular group roaming the streets of New York. But instead ironically of selling drugs or performing homicide, they produce and sell illegal, banned literature and disperse them to the highest bidders.

How else do you think I pay for college?

Although gang violence isn’t really their thing, that doesn’t mean they’re not in possession of such weaponry and devices. I’ve never seen anyone take literature as seriously as they do.

They’re also known for their bold publicity stunts, which are indeed fun to watch from a nearby coffee shop. Watching Alexander, Lafayette, and some other friends, John and Herc, run from the authorities on a Sunday afternoon, accidentally laughing at the sight of John tripping over his own feet, Lafayette mouthing ‘help us out’ in my direction. Very entertaining.

On the contrary, their security on me has become tighter and tighter. I know they worry for the gang’s reputation over my safety, but it feels nice to imagine having a battalion of book-worm gang members watching over you.

“I know, I know. You guys can stop treating me like a kid” I attempt to contain a giggle to portray my seriousness.

He takes a glance at me before returning his attention to the road. “You cannot say that until you have another way home other than me.” He sighed rather loudly

“Be careful, or I might do just that, Lafayette.”

---

I sipped on wine and ate cheese at Thomas’s place without a care in the world on a Saturday night. Of course, I had to accept Thomas’s offer, I never knew how to say no to him.

Jefferson has sure been taking his sweet time to put a title on us. Now, I’m no philosopher when it comes to dating, but Ice cream at the park, fancy dinners, and wine and cheese sure sound romantic.

My night was going well. All until the 7:30 alarm on my phone rang, and before I knew it, everything began to go downhill

[events of chapter 1]

And next thing I knew, the cold New York air slapped my face, following the harsh slam of the apartment door.

As my adrenaline began to settle down, panic rushed through my body.

Fuck. At this rate, I won’t be home until after my curfew. Although my immediate instinct was to sprint my way home, those thoughts were quickly followed by the idea of passing out within five minutes. My apartment isn’t too far, but being fueled by wine and cheese doesn’t sound like the best idea.

“Don’t test the waters, Y/N” echoed throughout my head.

I begin to walk down the street before whipping out my phone to contact an Uber.

The small talk produced between my driver and I worked a bit to calm myself down, but that would all change the moment I walked through my apartment door.

Once I turn back around from locking the door, I’m met with exactly what I didn’t want to see at this very moment.

Lafayette stood staring at me, his lips pursed with anxiousness, recognizing my significantly late arrival.

Hercules, another good friend I’ve met through the sons of liberty, stood beside Lafayette. His mouth hung open in shock as he also recognized my mistake.

John, the group’s smallest yet mightiest, leaned against the wall, perhaps planning my fate right in front of me

And none other than Alexander Hamilton himself, sipping scotch on my couch, similarly to how I was not too long ago at Thomas’s place. The glare on his face quickly reminded me that I was in big trouble.

“Y/N, I thought I told you—“ Lafayette began but was quickly interrupted

“You’re late.” He swirled his drink before standing up. The clock ticked, and the hour hand notably passed the 8:30 symbol. I was not getting out of this one.

Although I feared for the following moments, I attempted to contain my emotions within myself. I kept my straight face for the time being. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me.

“I’m well aware.” That came out of my mouth a little too harsh for my liking

“May I remind you that being out past your curfew could severely damage our image.”

I saw John look over to Alex from the corner of my eye. The air became thinner if that were even possible, and I refused to meet his eyes.

“And I do recall reminding you of your consequences.” He walked towards me and I felt my heart froze. “Having you out so late could raise some suspicions among our competitors, L/N.”

I couldn’t find the right words and resort to nodding instead

“I always fucking told you—“ he harshly slammed his drink onto the table beside him “—not to test the waters—”

“—I-I know—“

“So why the fuck are you stumbling in here past your curfew?”

At this very moment, I wondered if I had pulled the last straw.

I couldn’t speak. God forbid I spat out the wrong words. Contained within my thoughts, I didn’t acknowledge Alexander closing the distance between us.

“Ow!--” I watched as Alex shoved me to the wall, the moment playing in slow motion in my head.

Lafayette’s throat grew dry “Hey, Alex, Calm dow-”

He was interrupted by the sound of Alexander harshly slapping me across the face. My hands quickly went to soothe what felt like fire burning my cheek.

“We do so much for you, Y/N.” Alex growled

The sharp pain in my side grew, almost echoing throughout my body. I could feel my body giving up on itself. I mean, this wouldn’t be the first time Alex has acted like this.

Occasionally, Alex would stop by Lafayette and I’s apartment just to ensure I was home before my curfew, and he wasn’t the most forgiving.

--He owns an apartment key and has every single one of his gang member’s location tracked on his phone. Sometimes I wondered what was so special about us to have to keep all of us in check 24/7--

One time Hercules and I went shopping a little too late after sunset, part of me felt like a reckless teenager, probably because I was. I still remember Alexander’s face when I entered my own apartment, he looks identical every time.

In an attempt to shelter me, my body curled into itself against the wall. I shrunk to the floor, feeling his shadow intensely stand above me.

“Arghh!—“ the sound spilled out of me when I felt Alexander’s shin connect with my rib cage.

My lungs felt punctured under the pressure.

My arms felt like they could give out any second.

Part of me had wished I’d stay at Thomas’s place tonight, even if it meant telling him the truth.

What a predicament I’ve gotten myself into.

I looked up, wondering if my torment was over until I was met with a —Crack— Alexander’s knee encountered my face.

It was only a moment before I could hear the shuffling of the others’ shoes. I prayed they were coming to help me out.

Alexander lifted his glass of alcohol, previously forgotten, and hauled it towards me

Crash!

The piercing shards of glass combining with the stinging alcohol were the last thing I needed on a Saturday night. I didn’t notice the tears falling from my eyes until now, and the way my heart felt like it was just on a rollercoaster.

I kept my head low, watching blood drip down my face and onto the floor below me. And apparently, I wasn’t the only one to notice.

“Alex! What the fuck?!” I heard Laurens yell

“Are you trying to kill her?!?” I recognized Lafayette’s scream

Before Alex was able to make another blow, Lauren and Lafayette were quick to hold him back, attempting to calm him down.

Hercules swiftly knelt beside me, the guilt was obvious in his gaze. I hated the pity in each of their glances towards me. He attempted to wipe away the blood from my forehead with a paper towel.

Alexander fought back against the two, trying his best to prove his point. There’s the Hamilton we all know, unwilling to stand down no matter the cost.

Hercules turned back to me, his words were ready to leave his mouth from the moment we reconnected eyes.

“Y/N..” He pulled me up and shoved me out of my apartment door. “..Run.” I almost stumbled into a nearby pole, but I began running, if running in my condition was possible, back to Thomas’s place.

—-

[events of chapter 1]

The next thing I knew, I woke up in Thomas’s bed beside him. I took a moment to soak in the feeling of his satin sheets. Part of me can’t recall the events before I passed out in front of Thomas’s apartment, or maybe my mind refuses to remember them.

The sun hasn’t risen yet.

I turn to my side and reach for my phone, wincing from the pressure applied to my rib cage.

The bright light of my phone hitting my eyes felt like I was transported to another dimension.

54 notifications:

12 calls from Lafayette 🥐

24 texts from Lafayette 🥐

1 text from Alexander 💡

3 calls from Mariah 💋

14 texts from Mariah 💋

“oh fuck..” I sigh, wondering how things will play out.

Out of curiosity, I open the message from Alexander. Perhaps it’s an apology? Maybe a reminder?

Alexander 💡: I know where you are, Y/N. Don’t drag your friend into this. Because I can.

Where I am? I ask myself

My heart dropped, remembering that Alexander tracks my location 24/7. He knows where I am at this very second.

By escaping to Thomas’s apartment, I’ve just dragged him into this mess I’ve made. If my worlds collide, it would all be because I ran to this exact apartment.

Panic once again rushed through my body.

I need to get out of here. I need to leave.

I slip out from under the sheets and grab my belongings. Unprepared for what’s to come, I steal one of Thomas’s jackets from his cluttered desk chair. I’ll give it back eventually, I thought to myself.

After I put on my shoes I take one last glance toward Thomas.

He seems so peaceful when he’s asleep, tangled in his blanket, not to mention his name-brand Mac and cheese pajama pants.

I’m sorry if I drag you into this, Thomas, you just wouldn’t understand.

Taglist <3: @kenmacrumbs @strayblades @laic2299 @ohsoverykeri

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anastasiabeaverhousen87 · 4 years ago

Text

Halloween gone wrong- Part 2

A beeping sound, it was so annoying. You tried to ask for it to be turned off, but you couldn’t speak. You couldn’t move or couldn’t open your eyes. You could hear the beeping sound and voices. They probably gave you a paralyzing drug, you could feel the breathing tubes they had you in. But you felt so tired your body grew heavy and sleep took over again.

You hear the same beeping sound, this time more clearly and you can feel the stuff they gave to paralyze you was staring to wear off and you were trying to kick off the sheets, you hate having your feet covered. But when you open your eyes and tried to wiggle your feet, you could hear someone calling for a doctor or nurse and ratting you out that you were waking up. Someone gave you something again because after just a couple of minutes you could feel yourself fading out and you were so frustrated at not being able to uncover your feet.

It was Alex who administrated something into your IV. You could barely distinguish her voice, but the medication took over rapidly.

Alex: “we need to have her under sedation a little longer and keep the treatment and oxygen at 100%. Her saturation dropped to critical levels we need her on the ventilator for at least another 24 hours.”

Kara: “I know, but I just want to see her and talk to her. I hate seeing her like this. She was trying to move her feet. I forgot she hates having her feet covered. So, I´ll just moved the sheets now” – The blonde woman moves to uncover y/n feet and sits down next to her baby sister again, grabs her hand and rubs the back of it with her thumb.

Alex: “Oh! I did too. Maybe that’s why she was moving her feet so much. This kid and her damn hot feet. She is always feeling cold, but her feet are always outside the covers”- the red head woman walks to the other side of the bed and runs her fingers on your

The older Danvers looks down at y/n with soft smiles.

You can’t know how long it’s been, but you feel yourself waking up once again. This time you are meet with the sight of both your sisters. Kara’s baby blues filling with tears and Alex smiling fondly.

Kara: “hey sweet girl, welcome back”

Alex: “good morning baby girl, we missed you”

You tried to speak but couldn’t. You felt the tubes

Alex: “hold on baby, I’m going to take out the breathing tube. You’re going to take a deep breath and then cough while I remove the tube, okay?”, on three. One, two ...three. you take a deep breath.

You cough and feel a burning sensation while the tube is being removed and then Alex places an oxygen mask on your face.

Alex: “Easy, Easy. Slow breaths and don’t try to speak just yet”

Kara: “here baby , eat some ice chips. It will help with the sore throat”- you sister hand feeds you a spoonful with ice chips that soothes your throat and you hum in appreciation.

Y/n: “thank you”- your voices sounding very raspy.

You were about to ask how long you’ve been out, but Kara knows that’s what you are about to ask.

Kara: “you’ve been out for 60 hours and this morning we moved you from the intensive care unit. You gave us quite the scare there little one”- Kara says choking a little on her words.

Alex : “We lost you for a little bit , I’ve never been so scared in my life. We are so thankful you’re here with us. But baby, we need to talk. We almost lost you for a very dumb accident. You didn’t have your inhaler or emergency meds”. - Alex gets emotional and also has trouble speaking without her voice breaking.

Y/n: “I’m sorry” - you shed a few tears feeling awful for making your sisters suffer.

Alex; “We know, and we are not mad. We are so happy you came back to us. We can wait until you’re better. Just focus on getting better. I’ll keep monitoring your levels and oxygenation and if its good enough we can take you home later today, Okay?”

You nod and smile at your sister’s eyes growing heavy once again. You reach out with grabby hands trying to get Kara to snuggle with you, to which the blonde woman complies immediately by climbing into the bed next to you and you pretty much crawl you way into her arms to feel her warmth. You were feeling cold and you knew Kara would keep you warm. You lay your head on her chest and she circles your waist and holds you near without disturbing the I.V in your arm. Alex makes sure you are settled down okay and administrates something into your I.V, she then turns to you and caresses your face and temple and leans down to kiss your forehead.

Alex: “you can go to sleep baby”

Kara: “I got you munchkin, you close your eyes and sleep some more if you are tired. We are not going anywhere okay?” – you nod your head against your sister chest and just hum in agreement. Kara begins to hum a song to help you relax and fall asleep. You can hear heels clicking against the floor. Lena, you think.

You are almost asleep when you feel cool fingers and then warms lips placing a kiss to your forehead.

Lena: “hi sweet girl, I missed you. Sleep now”

You just smile at her and you close your eyes.

You feel warm and content. You are resting on something soft and firm, the more aware you become you realized that you are laid with you face on Kara neck and she has her arms around you. You are cozy and snuggled into your blonde sister.

Kara “good morning munchkin, sleep alright?

y/n: “hmmm”-you nod in approval, but you only snuggle more into your sister side.

you hear a chuckle but is not from Kara, you open your eyes and you see sparkling green eyes looking at you from the chair next to the bed.

Lena: “hello sweet girl, nice to see those beautiful eyes once again. How are you feeling darling?” -the green-eyed woman traces her fingers down your temple

y/n: “good, tired though” you give a small yawn and then you smile at Lena. “where’s lexie?”

Alex: “right here, and look who I found?” – your big sister enters the room followed by a smiling Nia carrying a huge teddy bear and then you’re eyes go wide at the sight of someone you haven’t seen in a very long time. Maggie Sawyer, who is carrying a small white box and a baby monkey plushy in her hands.

Nia” Oh my gosh y/n we were so scared, I’m so glad you awake now”- the quirky woman stands next to you and Kara and gives you a hug after Kara helps you into a sitting position. Nia hands you a huge fluffy teddy bear.

y/n: “Hi Nia, thank you he is cute” You give her a hug and smile and then you turn to brunet detective. - “Maggie?”

Maggie: “Hello Baby Danvers. I was in town and heard what happened to my favorite Danvers and I had to come by and see you little bean. Here I brought your favorite cupcakes and a baby monkey. Its so adorable it reminded me of you”

You tear up at seeing the brunette detective; you love Maggie dearly; she is an amazing woman and the two of you were inseparable. After she and Alex broke up you felt very sad but you kept in touch with her. However, its been a very long time since you last saw each other and right now it felt like too much and your emotions where all over the place.

The short brunet noticing your tears leans into you to give a big hug and you cling to her. You really missed her.

y/n: “I missed you so much Maggie. It so good to see you. “

Maggie: “I missed you too kid. I’m so sorry it took me so long to visit. But I’m so glad you’re okay. You gave everyone quite the scare.” -the detective says softly to your ear. Then she kisses your cheek and dries your tears with her thumbs- “No more tears baby D”

y/n: “I can’t help it, I really missed you Maggs”- you sniffle a bit more and take the offered box and monkey

Alex: “wow! I remember the time when I was the favorite Danvers”

Maggie and Kara laugh at that- “yeah sorry Danvers, but you know baby D was always the favorite”

Kara: “yeah I would be offended too if it wasn’t for the fact that y/n is so adorable I can’t really argue with you Maggie. It so good to see you and for you to stop by” – the detective leans into Kara and gives her a hug.

Maggie: “Its good to see you too little Danvers. And of course, I was coming. I was visiting anyways just never expected under such circumstances.”

The group in the med room spend a little while catching up with you and making sure you were doing alright and on the mend. you felt happy at having such amazing people on your corner and wanted to hear everything they have been doing, but you began to tire out and they noticed. Your eyes were droopy and you barely awake.

Maggie and Nia said their goodbyes and promise you to visit once you were back at your home. Maggie did mention she was going to be in National City for a couple of weeks and you tow would definitely be doing some serious catching up.

Once everyone was gone, Alex did a final checkup assisting of Doctor Hamilton to make sure you were good to go.

Dr. Hamilton: “everything looks good. I´ll get your prescription filled. You need follow the instructions I’m giving Alex and I’m also recommending one week of bed rest.” – you were about to argue you felt alright and you had work to do. “And no arguing or I will make it two weeks” – the doctor added in serious tone.

Alex: “Don’t worry I will make sure she follows the instruction to a T, and you young lady are not going anywhere. I already spoke with your boss and she made the proper arrangements during your medical absence.

Kara: “Yeah don’t worry munchkin, you just relax and let us pamper you for a few days okay? we are entitled”

Y/N: “Fine, but I’m getting all the junk food I want, of that I am entitled” – you huff and slump back into your sister front crossing your arms and pouting like a petulant child.

Kara: “of course you are cutie. You look like a chipmunk” – the blonde woman presses her hands on your cheeks laughing at your pouting lips and cheeks puffin like a tiny chipmunk.

Alex: “Alright kiddo, let me get your meds and Kara can you please help her into the clothes on the duffle bag. I’ll be back in a moment”- your big sister leans down and kisses your forehead.

Dr. Hamilton: “Very well, get well y/n. See you soon, but for lunch and no medical assistance”- the doctor says kindly and smiles down at you.

Y/N: “Thank you Doctor Hamilton”

The women leave the room, while Kara helps you into some sweatpants and lose shirt.

Kara: “all done, now lets jus wait for Alex and Lena is already downstairs”

y/n: “come on guys, you don’t need to stop all your activities just to take me back home. I know Lena is a very busy woman and she must be needed back in L-Corp and you also need to be in CatCo. I’ll be okay, just drop me off and I will lay on the couch for the rest of the day”

Lena: “Well sweetheart, first of all the place is called L-Corp for a reason, me being the owner and being the boss so I can do as I please. I am a very organized person and I can multitask very well, so you don’t need to worry about my work schedule. I wanted to be here with you guys because you are my family, and family comes first. Secondly, I’m here to take you back home and make sure you don’t trick your sister into getting you full of junk food, we both know she has no spine when it comes to tell you no”

You smirk at the looks Kara and Lena are giving each other.

Kara: “Hey I resent that! I’m not a push over”- the blonde woman pouts at her girlfriend.

Lena: “Never said you were, you just don’t like saying no to your baby sister and the both of you would end up eating pizza and pot sticker for breakfast lunch and dinner without supervision”

Alex: “That’s so true. Finally, I have someone on my corner when it comes to their bad alimentary habits” -the red -haired woman mentions while walking back into the room carrying a bag with the prescriptions and inhalers.

Lena: “I know, they eat like toddlers. Come one you two pouty faces lets go back to the apartment. I will order from the Italian place you love and get some comfort food I won’t be a total bitch. I will relent in some pasta and pizza, but you will eat some veggies and I will even get desert”

You perk up at the mention of your favorite restaurant and desert as a bonus “I love you Lena, and you are so not a b-word. Don’t say that”

Kara: “Totally babe, you are nothing of the sorts”

The group of four women made their back to the apartment Kara and Y/N shared, the youngest Danvers passed out on her sister’s arms during the car ride. Once inside the apartment Kara lay down y/n on the couch with a soft blanket while the two women went back to the kitchen area to order the food and Alex went through the doctor’s indications and meds, while Lena and Kara paid rapid attention.

After some time, you woke up to a light feather like touch on your cheek and arm, Alex was trying to rouse you from your slumber.

Alex: “wake up peanut, food is here you need to take your meds, come on sleepy head” – your sister softly continues to wake you up completely. You just look up to her with a goofy smile.

y/n: “mornin lexie”. Your voice sounding like a mewl from a kitty cat and you stretch in the touch.

Alex just chuckles at you and leans down to grab your arms so you can sit on the couch. But you grab on her neck and shoulders to bring her down with you and once Alex is on the couch you take the opportunity to climb into her lap and continue your nap.

Alex: “come on silly koala, you need food and meds. Wake up.” – the red-haired woman just rubs at your back making soothing patterns with her hand.

y/n: “No wanna. I’m so comfy right now”

Alex: “But its your favorite. Fettuccini Alfredo and triple cheese pizza. Lena even ordered the mini pies you like so much.”

You look up suspiciously at her:” and….?”

Lena: “And grilled veggies, come on time to eat” – the CEO responds from the dinner table.

Dinner was a quick affair; you stuffed your face on mini pies after getting the approval from eating your grilled veggies. The veggies were also delicious you just liked to give Alex hell about the consumption on healthy food. You and Kara always tended to annoy her by making faces at vegetables she cooked.

After a while all of you ended up in the living room watching a movie. You were slumped on top of Alex while Lena was pretty much like you on top of Kara. You seem more alert, which prompt Alex to pause the movie for a little bit and turn to look at you.

Alex: “We will continue with the movie shortly, I just wanted to talk too you now that you are more comfortable and alert. Don’t look at me like that. I need to know what happened so we can be prepared next time”

y/n: “I know…” you sigh and sit up a bit straighter so you could look at the women in the living room and began telling them how the events unfolded. Every detail, from using Kara’s costume, the angry dude and forgetting your medication in your rush to get to the party.

Alex: “Ok sweet girl. Thanks for letting us know. The drunk guy is the brother of one the involved parties during a bank robbery Supergirl was able to stop last year. The family suffered the consequences. He actually approached Jon after you were rushed to get medical attention. He explained he was stupid and drunk and furious at the wrong person. Took it out on you because you were wearing Supergirl’s costume and all the anger he had bottled up came up. and well even though I don’t condemn what he did, he didn’t expect you were going to panic and get an asthma attack. He felt sorry and he wanted to turn himself in. That’s a different story, but the issue here is that this could have been avoided if you had your emergency meds and inhaler. You had nothing and were on a place you were unfamiliar, without any of us. You are an adult and you can party and hang out with anyone you want, but as a responsible adult you should know by now that you live with a medical condition and it’s your responsibility to always carry your meds with you or to calls us if you forget or even tell your friend so they can be prepare. You scared the living shit out of them and us y/n too”

y/n: “I’m so sorry Alex. I know I was rushing and totally forgot I left them in my other bag. I know it’s not an excuse, but I did forget”

Kara: “You really need to be more careful baby. At least text or call to let us know. You know we can bring you a spare one. Jeez I can be there in seconds If you would just let me know”

Alex: “I’m not trying to be the bad cop here baby girl. But what happened cannot happened again, especially if it can be avoided. You stopped breathing and took several efforts to bring you back, you died on me for a few moments and sweetie that´s one of the worst things I even been through. We love you so much sweetheart and we almost lost you for a very stupid mistake” – at this point Alex was very emotional and choking on some words. You were not any better or any of the ladies in the living room for that matter. It was very traumatic for them, the thought of losing someone they love dearly like that.

Alex: “You also should know by now that after this scare I’m implementing some new rules and I’ll be on you checking on you. You owe me as much after that; I get to be the overbearing sister helicopter mom you and Kara call me behind my back and on my face. I don’t care, that’s my way of coping I’m just giving you a fair warning”.

Kara: “Preach it sister, I will be annoying you too. we love you so very much munchkin we just want you healthy and okay”

y/n: “I know, and I love you for it so very much. I do. I get it. I was scared too, that was one of the worst experiences of my life. It sucked so bad. And trust me, I don’t think I’ll be forgetting this anytime soon. Besides knowing how Lena is, she is probably already working on some sort of device to make sure you can all reach me or I can reach out and pin point my location 24/7”- you laugh a little at that last sentence but then you look into Lena direction who is trying to avoid eye contact with you looking very much suspicious.

y/n: “Oh My God you totally are aren’t you Lee?” – you laugh out loud

Lena: “Can you blame me? You did scare me sweet girl. And well, its no so much as creating a device its basically upgrading your current one, instead of just reaching out or calling for Supergirl, it can also contact Alex, me or Jon. And yes, it’s true; it will also provide live GPS system. Although I’m not sorry, no one bit”.

y/n: “I know. And I’m so thankful to have you, all of you in my life and on my corner. I feel so safe with you guys. I do promise be more careful or at least call whenever I forget bringing any of my meds along with me. pinky promise”

You feel arms engulf you from one side, Alex is bringing you into a strong and warm embrace while Kara leans down and kisses your temple and hugs the two of you. Making you practically be sandwiched in between your big sisters. Lena giving you all a huge smile, happy to be near all of you and knowing all of you are content and okay.

Y/n: “Come on Lee, you’re missing out on the love, bring it” – The dark-haired woman leans down next to Kara and also joins into the sisterly group hug.

You do have a lot of people on your corner, and it’s a great feeling knowing you have the most amazing sisters and friends with you, you are so very thankful for getting another chance at life and continue to walk this earth with them along the ride.

NOTE: I’m back, hopefully you’ll enjoy the second and last part of Halloween gone wrong. I’m still working on my other stories but for now here’s a little something to get by. thanks for all your comments or question in regard my stories or certain request you have, not saying I will make them immediately but I will try my very best. I do appreciate your words and likes to my post, I truly do.

xoxo Anastasia

#baby danvers #supergirl #supercorp #kara danvers imagine #Baby!Danvers #baby danvers imagine #baby danvers x lena #alex x baby danvers #alex danvers #alex danvers imagine #lena luthor #lena x supergirl #lena luthor imagine

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khadij-al-kubra · 4 years ago

Text

Worst Impressions are the First (ch 7)

Main Characters: Logan, Patton, Roman, Virgil (Human AU)

Pairings: Romantic LAMP

Word Count: 5036

AO3

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Author’s (longer than usual but it’s for good reason) Note: *The Apocalypse—2020. Zoom in on a plague rat turned writer. She has survived thesis projects, getting a Master’s degree, burnout, writing and illustrating a children’s book, being a slave for the U.S. census bureau, months of overthinking anxiety spirals, and one or two incidents involving an asshole skunk. But now, battle weary yet unwavering in her love of art and love for her loyal readers, this onesie-clad tea slurping book dragon....has finally arisen from the ashes*

I LIVE BITCHES!!!!!!! And I am SO SORRY for taking so long!!! I’ve been hard at work, been editing like a mad woman, and I even have a beta now! The gorgeous and talented @humbletortoise So I am OFFICIALLY off hiatus!!! *cue confetti canon*

Also, one of the biggest reasons I’ve taken so long to update is because I’ve spent the past month or so essentially retconning the fuck outta this fic. I realized looking back at earlier chapters in this story that, although I was proud of them at the time and greatly appreciate the positive reactions, they were...not my best work. (shitty first drafts if I’m being honest) That’s because, at the time, I was trying to split my attention between writing this fic and working on grad school stuff, which resulted in my writing for this not being as best of quality as it could have been upon first posting. This story deserves my best, and so do all of you. So now I hope to give you that.

I encourage you to go back and re-read the previous chapters up till now (trust me, they’re near unrecognizable to the first drafts, but in the best way). Or if you don’t feel like doing that, you can just continue on from here. totally cool. For the sake of convenience and my own sanity, I’ll attach the AO3 Link to this fic from the start. I may also start just posting chapter updates on tumblr but only have the link to the chapter and add my reader tags. Again, for the sake of my sanity because Tumblr is a bastard when it comes to posting fics. (Also PLEASE let me know if there are any tagging issues if anyone’s on my tags list; yet another reason i’m considering just linking my fics in the future)

Anywho, without further ado, at LOOOOOONG last, here is the next chapter!

Chapter 7 - (POV Roman)

When Roman had offered to walk with Logan to class, it was only partly out of an innate sense of chivalry; a side of himself that he rarely got to show on account of being a socially awkward gay disaster. Though mainly, he saw it as a chance to get to know his second soulmate better.

He certainly hadn’t expected two long minutes of civil but silent walking. Well, as silent as a stroll through their school could be with its usual racket buzzing around them. With a vocabulary as big as the continents of Africa and Eurasia combined, you’d think Logan would be more of a conversationalist. Alas. He merely walked in step with Roman. They glanced over at each other every so often, but Logan stayed tight lipped and seemingly impassive; fiddling with his bumblebee hair pin every now and again. Damn. Looked like he was going to have to make the first move.

Roman was bad at this. How did people usually…Oh yeah, common interest. That’s a thing. He wracked his brain for some sort of ice breaker. One that’d make him look cool and calm or, something, in front of Logan. He was a fairly decent student though not quite mathletes level. He could compliment his outfit maybe? Was that too forward? Too shallow? Maybe he could find common ground? That was as good a place to start as any.

“So! So uhh…What kind of music do you like?” Roman asked. Yeah, that’s good. Everybody likes music.

Logan glanced at him. “Can you be more specific?”

Roman’s brow furrowed. “I mean, like, your favorite genre of music to listen to?”

“Classical,” said Logan in a clipped tone.

“That’s cool. I don’t really listen to classical myself.”

Logan only hummed, his face neutral. Roman was really hoping for more than that. A few awkward seconds passed, then Logan spoke up.

“Are you perhaps a fan of the classic Sherlock Holmes novels?” He inquired.

“Um, I haven’t gotten around to the books yet, actually,” Roman said, scratching his earlobe. “I mean, I’ve heard great things about them. And I’m a big fan of the Robert Downey Jr. movies.”

“Ah. I see.” Logan said, giving him the judgiest side eye.

Come on, Roman thought. Give me something to work with. “Oh! What about theater?”

“What a frustratingly vague inquiry.”

“Well, excuse me for trying to get to know my soulmate a little better.” Ay come jode, work with me here, man!

Logan sighed. “While I understand and appreciate your intention, I believe ‘getting to know someone’ as you put it, requires a certain level of specificity. Anything less indicates a somewhat shallow level of sincere interest, and I greatly despise shallow conversation. That said, if you’re inquiring as to whether or not I enjoy theater, no. I don’t understand the concept of professional make believe, though I appreciate it as an art form. I assume you’re a fan?”

Is he seriously implying I’m shallow? Roman groused, pushing his red frames up the bridge of his nose. Ugh, forget it Roman. He’s throwing you a bone here. Take it.

“Obviously,” said Roman, gesturing dramatically. “I mean I’m no actor—Eesh. No. Yikes—but everything about the artform enthralls me. And I like all kinds of genres and eras of plays, from Shakespear to Ruhl, but musicals are by far my favorite, because like, there’s so much you can do with them design wise. I mean just look at how groundbreaking Hamilton was.”

For a second, Logan’s face actually softened, his eyes lighting up. But just as Roman thought they were finally about to make some progress, his stony companion was back to wearing that platinum puss.

“Ah. How… original.”

Roman blinked. “Are you saying my tastes are basic?”

“Well, yes.”

Augh! Okay. Yep. I don’t like him. Patton was going to be so disappointed, and Roman was too. He’d wanted so badly to get along with all his soulmates, but Logan was a snob! Way less intimidating than Virgil and his ilk, but still a jerk. I wonder if soulmarks can make typos or something? Thank the stars they’d already arrived.

Roman and Logan filed in with the rest of the class for seventh period. Somebody had the liberty of opening a window– the AC was still busted in this classroom– so for once there was actually a decent breeze cutting through the usual mucky Florida humidity. Still smelled like it would probably rain later. Good thing Roman had packed an umbrella just in case, Mom’s orders. His hair looked too good today to be wrecked by frizz.

Roman took a seat at his desk, running distracted fingers over the carved letters in the wood while he mulled over his predicament. Just look at him over there, thought Roman as he glared at Logan, not two rows away from him. Sitting with his hands clasped on the desk all smug—of course he’d be near the front—and with such disturbingly good posture. What is he, a robot? Who is he to call my interests basic, the NERVE! And okay, sure, like Hamilton, sometimes I get over excited and shoot off at the mouth. But great Zeus, does that guy show passion for ANYTHING besides academics? Roman blew a raspberry, plopping his head in his hands.

He always thought soulmates were supposed to get along, even as just friends for life. Balancing each other out, bringing out the best in you and forming a deep connection—that was the whole point. He sighed to himself. Cymbals clashed less than he and Logan did.

He was stirred from his brooding by the bell. Apparently Mr. ‘Call-me-Terrence’ Williams had materialized without him noticing. Okay fine, he should probably pay more attention, but he was having a crisis here.

“Afternoon everyone,” Terrence greeted in that measured, upbeat tone of his.

He draped his navy blue blazer over the back of his desk chair and rolled his shirt sleeves to the elbows. Roman pitied the poor guy; he had to teach sauna of a classroom all day. He could see the glisten of sweat on his teacher's smooth forehead as he wrote things on the board. Yet he still kept a pleasant attitude towards his students.

“Alright class!” Terrence started, “Today we’re covering the next section on the American Revolution. Specifically, the Battle of Yorktown...”

Roman mentally punched the air. My time has come. He opened his textbook to the right page but didn’t bother looking at it. He already knew most everything about Yorktown. Not just because he’d listened to the Hamilton soundtrack fifteen and a half million times, but also because he’d done actual research on the event and time period that the musical took place; There was always the off chance he’d get to stage crew or, heck, even dramaturg the show. He liked to be prepared.

“So the battle of Yorktown took place in 1781, but a great deal of its success was thanks to the French Allies. Many especially aided in fighting the British Troops surrounding New York. Now who can tell me where the French Soldiers first landed?”

Roman half raised his hand. He was pretty sure he knew the answer.

“Logan.” Terrence called.

Roman turned to Logan desk, where his hand was held high and mighty.

“The French Ally ships first landed in Rhode Island, then made their way to Chesapeake Bay,” said Logan, adjusting his glasses. Not even a hint of second guessing in his voice.

“That’s right!”

He almost missed the quick smirk on Logan’s frustratingly pretty face. Look at that smug—thinks he’s so smart...Okay yes, he is smart, but he doesn’t have to be a show off about it. Terrence continued through the passages, calling on a student every now and again to review. Of course, Logan got called on most and he got every answer right. Roman didn’t feel like raising his hand anymore.

“Of course there were many turning points in the revolution, but Hamilton’s return to the field for Yorktown was a key point.” Terrence continued on. “And keep in mind- this was a man who up till now had never been in a position of command before. Not to mention the mental strains he must’ve been under, especially having had to miss the birth of his son Philip, the first of three children he had.”

Wait a sec. “Well, that’s not right.”

Even though he’d muttered, apparently Mr. Terrence still heard him. “Come again, Roman?”

Shoot. “Um, I said,” Stop sounding timid, you know you’re right. “I said that was, um, wrong.”

The whole class turned to him. Oh great, history class has its eyes on me. Roman cleared his throat and tried to look taller.

“What I mean is: Hamilton had eight kids, not three. And on top of that, Phillip was born a few months after they won the Revolution, not during, so Hamilton didn’t miss the birth of his son. I mean sure, it’s a small thing, but the devil’s in the details as they say. Heh.”

Terrence gave the most insultingly bemused look. And Roman definitely heard a few kids snickering behind him. He glanced quickly at the culprits and felt his ears go hot. This is what he got for putting himself in the spotlight.

“Roman, I applaud you for participating in the class discussion,” Their teacher started gently, “but I’m afraid you’re wrong on this one. If you read your textbook close you’d see in the fifth paragraph where it mentions from one of his later letters—“

“Actually Mr. Williams, if I may, Roman is correct.”

Roman saw Logan at his desk, one hand raised while the other adjusted his neck scarf. Was the teacher’s pet actually… backing him up?

“It is a common misconception that Alexander Hamilton only had two children, even more so modernly, what with the musical having only named two of them. However Roman has clearly done his research on the plays historical accuracies, which is more than I can say for some.”

Logan shot a cool but scathing look at their recently snickering classmates and they withered. Roman fought the urge to point and laugh aloud. He did however stick his tongue out real quick. What? He could be shy and petty at the same time.

“My guess,” Logan continued, “is that this textbook edition is also either misprinted or outdated, judging by the publication date in the copyright section.”

Brows furrowed, Terrence looked at the textbook laid open on his desk. He flipped back to the front, before pulling out his cellphone—“I’m the teacher, I’m allowed to do this. You guys aren’t.”—and after what Roman guessed was a quick Google search, their teacher looked up. His eyebrows drawn in a ‘hm, well damn’ expression.

“Looks like you’re right, Roman. And thank you Logan for bringing to my attention about the textbooks. I’ll have to talk to the principal about hopefully getting some updated materials. But we’ll see how that goes,” Terrence, muttered the last part, though Roman was close enough to catch it. Terrence cleared his throat and moved back to the board. “Maybe if we call on assistance from the inside. Much like how the Sons of Liberty sent in Hercules Mulligan to spy on the British...”

“Perhaps if we knew of an immigrant who was unafraid to step in,” Logan said just under his breath.

No one else seemed to notice the reference, but when Roman did, he felt like a mini volcano about to burst rainbow lava. Apparently there was a lot more to his soulmate than first meets the eye; and now that he knew, Roman was determined to see more of it. The rest of class passed quickly and everyone filed out to the halls as the first bell for the last class period of the day rang. Roman made sure to catch up to Logan on the way out and staccato tapped him on the shoulder.

“Hey, Logan?” He said.

When Logan turned, he swore time slowed down for a moment. The brilliant boy’s skirt flared around his waist, and somehow his skin glowed even under the dull, inconsistent school lights. His posture was erect yet natural, he could have been raised among nobility. Amidst the stench and clamor of loud sweaty students, Logan was as poised and striking as the goddess Athena. Oh...

“Yes, Roman?” Logan asked.

Roman gulped. “I uh, just wanted to thank you for backing me up in there.”

“Thanks are unnecessary,” Logan said. “I detest when someone is shamed by other students for speaking up in class, regardless of whether or not they have the correct information.”

“Well regardless, thanks for coming to my aid in the face of academic danger.”

“Dramatic, but my pleas—oof!”

A hurried passerby bumped into Logan from behind, rushing off with a half-assed ‘sorry’. Logan, caught off guard, stumbled right into Roman’s arms. The two looked at each other, cheeks filling with heat. Roman caught a whiff of something faintly floral on Logan, something natural– a lavender and honeysuckle perfume, perhaps. It was heavenly. They were still in the middle of foot traffic though, so he maneuvered them to the side. Which was tricky since Logan was still so close to him and also a good two inches taller with the heels.

“Well,” Roman flashed his pearly whites. “Seems you’ve fallen for me.”

Logan pulled away, but his lips quirked upwards in a teasing smirk. “Oh please, I merely stumbled into you.”

“Ah, but stumbling is the first step towards being swept off your feet.”

“Bold words from an abashedly charming homunculus in such an… eye catching ensemble.”

Did he call me charming!? He composed himself, “Hey, don’t let the sweater vest fool you. I may be short but I’ve got guns.”

“Aaah. But mind over muscle, as they say. Do you find yourself up to the task?”

“Only if it’s you, my brainy blossom.”

Roman’s class was in the other direction, but Logan didn’t need to know that. They walked through the halls, conversing. class was still in the next ten or so minutes, but Roman was having fun. Banter with Logan felt surprisingly easy. Natural like they’d been at it all their lives.

“By the way, was that a ‘Guns n’ Ships’ reference I overheard, pastel poindexter?” Roman asked.

Logan cleared his throat. “It… may have been, yes. I found myself unable to resist toppling the figurative dominos.”

“In other words, you seized the opportunity you saw,” Roman said, matching his own reference to the source’s cadence, which got a chuckle out of Logan.

“Precisely. Under more casual circumstances, I may have even recited Lafayette’s part.”

“You can rap? You can rap Guns n’ Ships? Like, the whole thing, no tongue twists?”

Logan stopped for a moment, turned to Roman. The taller boy cleared his throat, and after a moment wherein he seemed to mentally restrain himself, he simply adjusted his glasses. “I have an appreciation for poetry.”

Roman blinked rapidly. Holy shit, he’s an even bigger nerd than I am. He definitely needed to see that at some point.

They turned a corner, stopping just outside of the science room. Some students were going in to take their seats, and the teacher was already making notes on the board. Logan pulled an AP Physics book from his backpack, but made no move to leave, much to Roman’s delight.

“So then,” Roman leaned against the eggshell wall, “How come you acted so indifferent earlier and called my tastes basic? Oh, and I think I remember you also implied I was shallow?”

Okay, yeah, he was still kind of salty about that. But then he saw the shamed look on the nerd’s face, and Roman wished he could have taken it back. Logan looked at his shoes then back at him.

“To be candid I was… hesitant to show the full extent of my enthusiasm. In case you thought I’d be—I believe ‘being the most’ is the term— it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve caused someone to lose interest in conversing with me due to informational overload. I nearly bored my Aunt Patricia to sleep once talking about a fascinating article on jellyfish. And considering how I blundered our initial meeting—“

“Pfft, ya think?” He mentally slapped himself again when Logan went tight-lipped and turned to go. “No, no, wait. I—I’m sorry. Truly. ...Truth is, I was no gentleman either. I’m not always great at thinking before I speak. It’s why I’m so awkward around people. Takes a while for my true charming nature to shine through.”

“Clearly. Still, you show a level of interpersonal aptitude that I, well, lack.” Logan fiddled with his hair pin again and a stray hair came loose. “Reading people and expressing emotions has never really been—It’s something I struggle with.”

Much as Logan tried to maintain his cool composed posturing, Roman could tell that this was something that really bothered him. He tried so hard to seem put together and confident and serious, but really he was just as awkward and insecure as anyone. Roman smiled softly and stepped closer to Logan, reaching up to tuck the loose ebony strand behind his ear.

“Hey, everyone’s got things about themselves they can work on. Including me,” Roman smiled. “And believe me when I say that I will never judge you for being passionate about something you like. So if you ever want someone to ramble about jellyfish or Sweeney Todd to or—I dunno, calculators or something?—I’m all ears.”

Logan’s cheeks went pink and he gave a hesitant yet sincere smile. “That’s...very kind of you, Roman. And coincidentally, I also greatly enjoy Sweeney Todd. The use of iambic pentameter and alliteration to give a succinct synopsis to the story in just the first sentence alone is pure brilliance.”

“Right!? I mean the man’s a mad genius. I’m dying to design sets for one of his musicals someday. Like last year? I came up with the concept of having the Sweeney Todd sets done in a way that highlights the class differences with the characters.” Roman went into a small three minute ramble regarding the specifics before he cut himself off abruptly. Logan was blinking rapidly, a look of mild shock crossing his feature. Roman nearly started sweating; Had he messed this up again?

“That… that’s ingenious”

Roman’s ears were burning. Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!

“Hey, Logan!” They both startled and turned to an impatient cheerleader with a ginger undercut and they/them pronoun pin shaped like a coffin. “What’re you doing just standing out in the hall, ya dork? Oh, hey Roman.”

“Uh. Hey, October,” Roman said, waving awkwardly to them.

“I told ya, Red, you only get to call me that when we’re working on a show.”

“Wait, October? Red? You two know each other?” Logan asked, brow arching.

“Kind of. They sometimes help out with costumes for the drama club,” said Roman. And they have terrible timing. I mean seriously Tobes, we were having a moment.

“Come on Lo, class is about to start, and you promised to go over my homework with me real quick beforehand. See ya ‘round, Ro.” Toby grabbed Logan’s hand and pulled him into the classroom. “You can fill me in on what you were doing with Red later.”

Logan followed his—apparently—friend into their classroom, but he shot Roman an apologetic look over his shoulder. Roman bounced a bit on the balls of his feet before following halfway into the room. Logan was in his seat with Toby showing him an open notebook. A teacher in a tight grey hair bun was writing on the board. Students at their seats were chatting, and some looked up at the short dork in red who burst in. For once Roman ignored them, his mind set on one last attempt at wooing his green skirted genius while he still had the nerve.

“Hey, Logan,” he said. “I’ve also got some great layout designs for an Into the Woods set. If you’re interested, maybe we can meet up after school and I can show them to you? Maybe we talk a bit more over iced lattes or something?”

“Excuse me, Mr. Prince, seventh period starts in five minutes,” said the teacher. “Unless you’ve suddenly transferred to my class, I suggest you stop distracting my favorite student and get going.”

“I’ll be gone in just a second,” he said. “Well?”

Logan smoothed the silky fabric of his pink scarf and said, “That sounds optimal, Roman. I’ll meet with you. By the first floor water fountain perhaps?”

Roman grinned. “I shall be counting the minutes.”

“Mr. Prince,” said the teacher with a warning glare.

Roman blew a kiss at Logan and then ducked out of the doorway. Was he embarrassed of himself? Oh definitely. Did he regret it? Absolutely not. He felt ten inches tall.

Now to complete the quest of making it to class in time. He slid off a shoulder strap to unzip his classic Mickey backpack, getting out the notebook and the relevant homework. He found them amidst the mess of spiral notebooks, granola bar wrappers, two textbooks and rainbow sticky notes. But something was missing from his folder.

“Where are those– it should be here.” He could’ve sworn he had his stapled the blocking notes in his folder. No, wait, the last place he saw them was— “Ah shoot! I left them in the tech closet again.”

Under normal circumstances, Roman would’ve grabbed them after school, but the auditorium was locked on weekends. He’d have to wait till Monday to get them and that just wouldn't do! he wanted to show Logan his notes today! I’ll bet David Korins never has these kinds of problems. Okay, okay. Still got four minutes. He could rush to the auditorium, grab the notes, and then head straight to class. I should have enough time, right? Right. Besides it was only Spanish Class, he was already pretty fluent after all those summers visiting his grandparent in Nicaragua. He spent most of class time dreaming up blocking notes anyway.

Despite not being totally convinced by his own argument, Roman immediately turned on his heel and started running in the opposite direction. After a teacher told him no running in the halls, Roman power walked through the halls with a skip in his step and a song in his heart, feeling absolutely gay in both senses of the word. Logan had actually called his idea ingenious! And the way those sharp eyes softened just for him- he would squeal if not for the fact that it would draw too many eyes to him. The halls were still filled with a few stragglers rushing to the last class of the day, and he was already trying not to get caught being late for class.

Now he knew how Maria felt in West Side Story. Y’know, before Act 2. Oh sure, they’d gotten off to a shaky start, but as the Bard’s adage on the course of true love said; and Roman felt it in his gut that this was certainly the start of true love. Not just with brilliant Logan but also with soulful Patton as well. He didn’t know how an awkward geek like him ever got so lucky in the soulmate department…Then again, there was still the matter of Virgil. So maybe not so lucky.

Roman touched his arm, remembered flustered yet flattering purple words. I know they both said Virgil is secretly sweet and I can sympathize with the terrors of closet town, but COME ON! Virgil? Really? That gloomy gladiator? There had to be a mistake in that. After all, Patton liked to see the good in everyone. Logan was much more of a skeptic, but he does seem to have a blind spot with sarcasm. Maybe Virgil was messing with them somehow. Even if he’s not a jerk jock, the guy’s still kind of a creepazoid; with his dark eyes and cheeta-esq gait and those probably huge muscles hidden under that bulky jacket and big hands...

His gay disaster train of thought came to a merciful halt as he reached the auditorium. Roman pushed open the doors, took a pause to breathe in the quiet comfort of this chapel of the arts. Okay yeah, chapel was maybe a little kind for the school’s auditorium which doubled as the drama Club’s rehearsal space/prop closet backstage/Mx Joan’s unofficial office because the school didn’t fund the arts programs enough. Even so this space was Roman’s sanctuary. The place where he could help create magic from the shadows, bring stories of those gone and living to life. Here, Roman found something of a community with his fellow backstagers, glee club losers, and budding thespians (the nice ones). So he loved every squeaky stage plank, every duck taped seat cushion and every speck of dust that floated in the spot lit air like fairies.

Mx. Joan wasn’t around for once, thankfully. Probably in the teacher’s lounge or rendezvousing with the school nurse or something. They were pretty chill and Roman knew he was their favorite student, but the choir director/drama club moderator/music teacher (this school really needs to fix its funding habits) wouldn’t have been too keen on Roman being deliberately late for class.

Roman walked down the aisle and to the side room by the stage. It was originally a janitor’s closet, but their club moderator transformed it into a ‘Crew Only’ Storage Unit… Okay it was still a closet, but with less bleach and more coils. This was where they kept important equipment for semester shows, like the lighting and sound boards, along with other supplies. Roman made a quick mental note to get more gaffer tape later, seeing their supply was low.

He looked through the small pile of scribbled and highlighted sheets with the lighting cues for the spring show. I’ve really gotta get a binder for these…Ah-Ha! Here you are! Roman pulled out the stapled sheets titled ‘Into the Woods Dream Set’ and carefully shoved them into his bag. Perfect timing too. He might just be able to make it to class after—

RIIIIIIIIIIING

“GAH!”

What the heck? He could’ve sworn he was alone in there, but that yelp just now said otherwise. Up close, Roman saw that the curtains were rustling, accompanied by sounds of heavy breathing and moaning, yet not a footstep to be seen or heard.

Holy SHIT, this place IS haunted! I KNEW that backdrop fiasco last semester wasn’t caused by cheap slit plywood. My supplies are the best quality allowance money can buy. Great Macbeth’s bloody knife, I TOLD Kai we should've sprung for a ghost light! Remus always teased him for being superstitious but look who’s laughing now.

He dashed back into the crew closet and grabbed the heavy push broom leaning in the corner. Roman Prince was NOT about to be caught unawares and possessed by the ghost of a disgruntled student without a fight. He would defend his domain of imagination!

Roman slowly climbed the stage steps, wielding his broom like a bow staff, turned the curtain corner where the noises were coming from and was about to release a war cry on the—

“Virgil?”

Roman nearly dropped his weapon at the sight of Virgil Alighieri—star athlete, object of his fears and supposed soulmate—curled in on himself trembling and crying.

His jacket was pulled over his head like a hood, yet Roman could see the tear stained face peeking out from underneath. Virgil’s eyes were squeezed tight, making the dark circles he’d never noticed before more prominent. There was no denying the athlete had muscle but he was more lithe—thin enough for Roman to wonder if the guy ate enough. Virgil’s trembling could rival a chihuahua, shaky hands clutching his knees, and he was clearly in the midst of a bad panic attack.

Roman had built Virgil up in his mind as being like some odd combination of Hades and Ares. The strong silent wolf within his pack of jocks, a surging thunderstorm just waiting for the right nerd to come along and piss him off enough to strike down like the bolt of Zeus.

Someone to be afraid of.

But now? Seeing him in this state, all alone and whimpering like a wounded animal...it broke Roman’s heart.

He set the broom down gently and carefully crouched down in front of Virgil. “Virgil,” he said softly. “Virgil, can you hear me?”

Virgil let out a breathy sob but otherwise didn’t seem to register him. Just how long had he been sitting here like this?

Roman was at a loss for what to do. Sure he knew plenty of people with anxiety but never saw someone having an actual panic attack before. He did know that if he didn’t help the other calm down soon, Virgil was liable to pass out. He’d never wanted to hug someone so badly in his life. Roman tentatively reached out a hand but stopped. What if touching him makes it worse? What if I startle him so badly he actually has a heart attack!? Maybe I should get the nurse. But I can’t just leave him like this.

He caught sight of the colorful soulmarks written on Virgil’s arm. Saw his own harsh thoughts: ’Dios mio, he’s staring right at me—like he wants to punch my face!’

Roman took his shame and forged it into steel. I won’t abandon you...my soulmate.

Virgirl’s let out a hiccuped cry, and this gave Roman an idea. Something from back when he was a child. It was probably stupid and a long stretch, but it was all he could think of. He readjusted himself so that he was now sitting right next to Virgil, making sure not to startle him. Roman cleared his throat, then as softly as he could, he began to sing.

“Come stop your crying, it’ll be alright.

Just take my hand, hold it tight.”

Roman one and carefully gentled his hand over Virgil’s. After a moment, he felt a light squeeze, and that encouraged him to keep going.

“I will protect you from all around you.

I will be here, don’t you cry…”

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sophiexteresa · 4 years ago

Text

Thomas Sanders Instagram Q&A Transcript

From @thatsthat24’s Instagram story, 25/8/2020. Questions in bold. Text added to the story in (parenthesis/brackets), and descriptive info in *italics*. I tried uploading the video(s) too, but Tumblr is having issues, so here’s the transcript only!

Thomas: I had some time this evening so I figured, hey, why not? Another lil’ Q an’ A, so if you want to ask a question *posh French voice* be my guest!

When approximately will the next sanders sides be out? Very good question! Uh, we are aiming this for a late September release, that’s what we’re all working towards.

Favourite musical you have been in or just favourite musical in general? This is really tough, I can’t decide. I’m between Rent where I was in the ensemble, Peter Pan where I played Slightly Soiled, which was just one of the lost boyos — boyos? Boys — and, uh, Into The Woods where I played Cinderella’s prince and that’s where Roman’s first costume came from.

Are you ever gonna due your hair purple again? I loved it! Yes! I miss the purple hair too.

Do you love me? *laughing* Yes of course! I do love me.

What would each of the sides’ reaction be to seeing the Grand Canyon? *speaking very quickly* Roman would be revelling that we made the journey, Patton would be marvelling at the memories being made, Logan would be telling you to look at these fascinating signs for important information, Virgil would be telling you to ‘get back from those cliffs!’, Janus would be telling you to take pictures to make it look like you’re next to the cliff, ‘for clout’, and Remus would be like *Remus voice* ‘you could push somebody and get away with it’.

Also when will we get more Picani, I miss him? You and me both, Bri, and honestly with the amount of amazing cartoons that have come out recently *sighs while smiling* yeah, I am a-hankering (?) to get back to Emile!

How have you been doing, like really? Mental health is important as you teach us: I feel like everybody’s kinda struggling with mental health right now, especially people in the USA with COVID. Uhm *clears throat* for me I continuously struggle with the balance between work and leisure time, um, social media makes that difficult, blurs the lines, and I’m working on it.

Do you have any tattoos? Umm, I don’t, uh, I struggle with the permanence of tattoos. And like do I, can I, make a decision that I like? But! There are tattoos that I might like. Where I’d put them, I have no idea, umm, but I think like, maybe like, little stars!

What rank of “Gay” are you? Big gay? What rank? *speechless pause* uh... General. You know? I wanna do my duty. Come back a hero. An all-American Queero *gets an idea* *roughly quoting Hamilton* Queer comes the General!

Can you please make Logan day something Patton would say? *Logan’s voice* Something Patton would say? Umm... please, I request more baked goods from the kitchen so that I can fill Thomas’s body with more trans-fats at 3 am. I don’t know, I don’t like this game.

Have you ever dated a girl? *awkward silence* I have. It was pretty uneventful.

Do you miss your friends? *laughs* Oh... *face crumples as if he’s about to cry*

What are you voice acting in or are you now allowed to say? Not until tomorrow.

When did you know you were gay? I think I answered this one on the last Q&A, but it was early. I was like, 9 or 10 at least.

When will we see Gavin? Gavin has started school! He’s back in his hometown, so I don’t know when I’m gonna see him. He’s still getting taller — I can actually include a picture of him that his mom sent me after he got a new little hairdo *insert photo of an awesome Gavin here*

Do you miss vine? For like, sentimental reasons, yes. Uh, I mean, technically it had its issues and I don’t miss being restricted to 6 seconds anymore *laughs*

What has been your favourite part of the day? My favourite part of today was actually... I came up with this last minute short video, and I got it done and I sent it to some friends and they really liked it. I have to save it until Thursday thought, but it’s just nice to come up with stuff that makes your friends laugh.

Janus acting like Remus? *Remus’ voice* Remus here! Looks like the Dukey just dropped in! *Remus’ laugh* *Takes a breath and snaps into Janus’ character* I spend a lot of time with him so I’ve had a lot of practise.

Why do I feel like we’re gonna have another angsty Virgil moment? When is Virgil not being angsty...?

Please can you say trans rights? Uh, heck yah trans rights! I, uh, this one was very simple but I wanted to say it!

Do you think Virgil would be into anime? Actually, if you remember from, uh, Accepting Anxiety, uh, part 2, there’s actually a Death Note poster in his room, so he definitely likes some anime.

Hi! Can you say hola to the Hispanic fanders in el vecindario fander? Please? We love you! Oh my gosh, *a very naturally american pronunciation* hola! that’s very kind of you guys. I appreciate all of the support you guys give, and I love all of you guys.

STORYTIME! I love you: *upbeat voice* Storytime! I love you back.

How gay are you? Like, 15 gay! I rank General!

How did you end up meeting and babysitting Gavin? Gavin is actually Leo’s nephew, so he would come up here, uh, during the holidays or during the summer, and alternate being baby-sat between me and Leo’s mom - his grandma.

What was the inspo for Janus’ outfit? Ooh, that’s a really good question, uh... Joan had a vision in their mind for almost kind of like this early 20th century or late 19th century kinda Jack the Ripper vibe.

Any advice for gaybies to fit in with society? Don’t apologise for being yourself. If people have an issue, that’s their issue that they have to work through. Do not apologise for being yourself.

What type of gay are you? (Math gay, plant gay, caffine gay, etc): Wait, there’s such thing as a math gay? I am absolutely that, and I feel like I’m just gonna be naming traits about myself but I’m a trivia gay, a driving gay, apparently a math gay, a Disney gay *laughs* and a theatre gay.

Not a question but I’m glad to be alive at the same time as someone as great as you: Dude, this stuff is really sweet. *laughs* That’s really sweet, umm, trust me, I feel the same way about all of you. Honestly.

Why don’t you own a doggo yet? I... went to Petsmart today - I didn’t get an animal, but like... I’m thinking about it and this question is like... hmmm...

I’ve run out of cartoons to watch, any recommendations? Owl house! Owl house, owl house. I just tried it, and I immediately got hooked. Infinity train’s also a really good one, duck tales is amazing, and I’m getting ready to start Tangled: the animated series, so *shrugs*.

What is Patton’s opinion on rats? *adorable Patton voice, slowly zooming in on his face* They are tiny little squishy precious babies!!!

How do I ask people for their pronouns? I don’t know, I mean, I don’t think it’s like a big deal? I hope we could get to the point where we could just be like ‘what are your pronouns?’ and then they would tell you, and then you’d just, you know, carry on the rest of your conversation.

A circle has no bounds and it’s the same with your beauty: This is really precious, and it of course came from Nash (?) who is a poet, he published a lot of wonderful, wonderful poems on twitter, they are are amazing, and you are once again far too sweet, Nash.

Dream role? This is a pretty broad question, so maybe dream theatrical role would be Sweeny Todd, dream movie role would be anything in the marvel universe, uh, really just give me anything in any voice acting role, *smiling mischievously* egg rolls are also really good.

Can Remus please say ‘I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand’? *Remus voice* I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand! (love that vine)

Are there still plans for the Roman series? *nods* Oh, yeah, yeah, it was definitely hindered by COVID, uh, as was this Sanders Asides episode that’s coming up, which is why it’s taking longer in the editing stage, it is our, uh... strategy, for circumventing the obstacle, and we hope you like it.

Are we still getting an August playlist? Uh, heck yah you are! But honestly, actually, if you guys have any suggestions I should include in the playlist, lemme know! I’d be happy to get some suggestions - but yes. You will be definitely getting one.

May I please see your feet? *confused, slightly disgusted expression* *begins to move the camera away from his face* *holds up a tape measure, extended to 1 foot long* *grins*

Any shows on Netflix to recommend? Umbrella Academy is really good, Dragon Prince, uh, She-Ra, of course, umm The Hollow (?) is really cool, there’s a documentary about video games called High Score, that was really fun.

Roman, who would you say the gayest side is? *Roman’s voice* Oh, we’re all equally gay, okay? *chuckles* it’s a sexuality, not a personality trait. *takes a breath and speaks quickly* I’m just kidding it’s *sings* meeeeee!

If you were not a YouTuber, what would you see yourself doing and why? Uh, maybe putting my chemical engineering degree to some use. *laughs awkwardly* Uh, I went to school for 5 years for that one.

Like you literally make me so flipping happy: I’m glad! I don’t know what I’m doing to do that, but the feeling is absolutely mutual.

Can we have Virgil saying “Falsehood”? *hair already over one eye, in Virgil’s voice* Uh, c’mon, okay, sure. *very quietly and unenthusiastically* falsehood. Is that good? Is that? I don’t know, I don’t wanna steal his bit.

Which Sanders Side do you feel you embody most? Ah, I would probably say it’s either Patton or Roman because Patton can be definitely me, all the time, just really enthusiastic about things and finding things cute, but Roman... Roman’s sensitivity, oh. That’s me.

What was the first job you had? I actually worked as a page in a library! A- pages basically just kinda like, shelve books, check books out; it’s one of the chillest jobs I’ve ever had, one of my favourites, and my dad always had a lovely dad joke for it: ‘you’re working as a page, when do you get promoted to a book?’

How tall are you? I usually say 5ft 10, but I think I’m trying to be a little more realistic with myself. And I’m probably 5ft 9 and a half. *zooms in on his face, staring into the camera* I’m holding onto that half a foot for all dear life.

DROP THE SKIN ROUTINE PLEASE! This is very sweet, uh, I, *laughs nervously*, uh, I use Curology? They’re very nice. Umm, just... different kinds of lotion, I guess. (I suppose I should write down what I do lol)

Can we get a FALSEHOOD? *is standing* *clears throat* *points upwards from his eyeline* FALSEHOOD!

Do you have a boyfriend if not are you planning on dating soon? I do not, uh, dating is kinda difficult right now midst COVID, you know, kinda tough... love... in the time of Corona... umm, but, you know, option’s open.

When was your first kiss? I’m sure I’ve answered this somewhere, it was in high school, I might have been 15 or 16. It was with a girl. *Shakes head* And all I can remember is hitting teeth. A lot.

Can we get a super super vague hint about the new Asides episode? Alright, I’m getting ready to end the Q&A, so this, you know, if you’ve made it so far you deserve this super vague answer, umm... it includes a side that was not in the last episode. (This isn’t much, I apologise lol)

Thomas: And that is it for this evening! Thank you so much, you guys, for watching. I know some of you are still over in Europe watching and it’s like 4 in the morning, and I need to go to bed so thank you all so much for your questions - I gotta do this more often ‘cause I really enjoy it. Love you guys, gals, and non-binary pals. Peace out!

#edit: if you want to see the video(s) then please feel free to ask and i’ll try to send it to you! thanks so much #WOAH #This took me literaly hours to write up #probably 5 or so hours #i've been at it all day #anyhow tags!#thomas sanders #sanders sides #tss #tssides #ts roman #ts patton #ts logan #ts janus #ts remus #ts virgil #ts #if there's any corrections i need to make please tell me since i'm too tired to re-read

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britishchick09 · 4 years ago

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1984 livewatch

the time has finally come to watch the full movie! it’ll be sad, it’ll be disturbing, it’ll possibly be cringy, but it’ll be a lot of fun! :D

we start out with the mgm lion! noice ;)

epic quote B)

wait why is opera music playing i thought we’d start at the 2 minutes hate

OMG what if they’re gonna hate on opera

this looks like a drive-in movie tbh

narrator: “this is a land of peace and hope, a land of plenty...” OH SHUT UP YOU

they’re showing wheat like it’s little house on the prairie BOI YOU’RE IN LONDON

this is epic propaganda B)

what if the war footage was taken from ww2 and thus... isn’t real :o

HOLD UP is the eurasian war racist?

THE QUEEN HAS ENTERED THE CHAT

WHAT ARE THEY ALL SHOUTING I CAN’T HEAR WHAT THE FDR GUY IS SAYING SHUT UPPPPP

oh no it be u (his face is like ‘WHAT IS GOING ON’ and it’s very lol)

julia’s so into this! :o

o’brien’s like ‘ohhh!!!’

look who decided to SHOW UP FINALLY

he pauses a bit before reluctantly joining in yas ♥

OMG THIS IS LIKE A SCHOOL ASSEMBLY STOP TALKING GEEZ

good they stopped!

WOWWW DON’T EVEN LIST SUZANNA HAMILTON’S NAME WITH THE OTHERS GIVE HER A ‘WITH’ CREDIT WOWWWWW

this IS a school assembly they’re going back to work!

winston in glasses *chef’s kiss*

ooh a rotary dial! great use of tech from when the book was written :D

winston’s looking over at syme WITH SO MUCH JEALOUSY lol

what if the words they speak are just random stuff with no meaning

OMG confession!!!!!

poor winnie with his cough :(

this confession sounds JUST LIKE WINSTON’S OMG!!!!

winston: “bugger!” he’s a brit lol :D

epic B)

OMG this guy read goldstein’s book SO DID WINSTON!!!!

i love how the diary is in a brick hole that’s so cool :D

the diary scene was filmed on april 4th just like in the movie so that’s way rad man :D

i want you valley!!! :D

ooh they’re put a smol scene of his childhood in there coolio! :D

he s l e e p

this violin squeak tho :o

OMG THIS IS THE STANDING UP SCHOOL SCENE

it’s not but i can easily imagine it lol :D

he’s a stick omg ;o

when the lady talks to him you know it’s not a recording ;)

lady: “anyone under 45 is perfectly capable of touching his toes” BOI

oh no PARSONS

parsons: “choco rations are going up” c h o c o

parsons: “i seem to have run out of razor blades for some reason’ yeah,,, for some reason... ;)

this is so a cafeteria scene at school

THEY SAW EACH OTHER OMG

♫ i suddenly see him standing there, a beautiful stranger tall and fair, i wanna stuff this weird food in my faaaace! ♫ :D

me: “this is so romantic!” winston’s thoughts: “lemme smash HER WITH A ROCK”

wait did the lady say pineapple grenade???

HIS FACE LOOOL

syme rip boi

the 11th edition isn’t thicc :/

aww winston’s smol nod ♥

parsons: “by 2050 we won’t have conversations like this!” yeah because of screens lol

OMG the food looks and taste like meat but isn’t IT’S PLANT BASED MEAT!!!! :o

parsons just pulled a ‘hey need help with that?’ and put winston’s food on his plate EPIC

julia’s lookin’ at u ;)

YAS PROLES HOPE!!! :D

oh no DON’T TALK ABOUT THE 50 YEAR OLD WOMAN SEX WINSTON

OH NOOOOOOO

he liked the ‘bright red lips’ yet...

THIS CHICK’S LIPS AREN’T BRIGHT BOI

poor baby desperate for money :(

let’s GET THIS BEAT

hand on cheek = doublepluscute ^_^

epic foreshadowing B)

OMG CHESTNUT TREE POEM FORESHADOWINNNGGGGGG

OMG a couple is making out in the bar EPIC

winston’s just like ‘nnope’

OMG THE THOUGHT POLICE WERE FOLLOWING????

he’s at an antique store in prescott bless his heart ♥

mr. charrington sounds so kind WHYYYY

THE BIRTH OF A QUEEN ♥

mr. charrington says ‘4 dollars’ but they’re in london??

YAS BELLS OF ST. CLEMENS!!!! :D

winston: “what was that?” mr. charrington: “something old.” no DUH

they see each other againnn!!!!! :D

winston writes that he hates her SAME WITH A LOOK LIKE THAT

OMG SMOL WINNIE BIG O��BRIEN????? :o

his mom is lying dead in the field like the erza kid in ‘kirsten’s promise’ :(

he’s just... staring

OMG SPYING ON THE SPICY STARING ACTION :o

she PLONKED

that ‘ow!’ was so fake jules!

this is like anna and hans but not as bad underneath!

julia: “it’s nothing!” but this is turning out to be something... ;)

we’re half an hour in and wowza it’s gone by so fast! :D

winston: *gets a cute love note from julia* YEET!

THE HELICOPTER IS BACC!!!!! they’re really not making the spying subtle

OMG THIS IS THE THOUGHT CRIMINAL SCENE YAAAAS!!!!! :D

winston is the best plummer confirmed

kid: “you’re a thought criminal!” winston: *gives a slight ‘wha’ face and smiles* ICONIC

the crowd is clapping and cheering over the war yet winston’s not doing anything SAME

jules is just scooching by lol

HAND HOLDING WHILE PASSING A NOTE OMG ♥♥

the sky does exist! :o

the telescreen has some great music :D

winston’s joining the ‘big man’s hiking group’ suure you are... ;)

the train is going to the beat of the kids’ singing coolio! :D

big brother is called ‘bb’ yas bby!

YEEES THE I WANT YOU VALLEY SCEENE!!!!!

the lq audio made the twig crack and the leave brushing really weird lol

winston: “i want you.” I-CON-IC!!!! :D

THAT SMIRK THO

winston: “i want everyone corrupt.” julia: “i’ll suit you, then. i’m corrupt to the core.” *mal screech*

OH NONONONOONO SHE GONNA TAKE HER TOP OFF BI PANIC BI PANICCC!!!!!

she really went commando huh

ALL THE WAY

the sex looks like it hurts NO WAY MAN NOT FOR ME NNNNOPE

i’m glad it was only a part you couldn’t really see and not a full on thing I DON’T NEED THAT

awww she’s so peaceful after big naughty :)

this is vaguely gay...

aww winston’s hair ruffling in the wind ♥

c r o n c h

also did he just cronch into a potato???

OMG THIS IS JUST LIKE SCHOOL

teacher: “when the orgasm is finally eradicated...” totally julia: “NOT ON MY WATCH”

winston is the kid who smokes in glass while julia is the one kid who Just Doesn’t Care lol :D

thoughtcrime THIS IS THOTCRIME

wow syme is still alive?

julia: “you dropped your ink pencil” you mean pen?

winnie’s back in prescott! :D

the room is 4 bucks a night noice B)

BACC TO THE H8 BBY

the modern say 2 minutes hate is probably just a livestream with kids texting ‘h8 xd’ in the chat lol :D

winston’s thoughts: “she who is so careful...” boi she threw a dictionary at the telescreen in the book THAT’S SO NOT CAREFUL

hey girl CUTE LQ SMILE YOU HAVE THERE!!! :D

YAS THE REAL COFFEE SCENE!!!!! :D

she has so many smiles YAS!!!!

she’s so eager with showing him I LOVE YOU SO MUCH JULES ♥♥♥

she says ‘real sugar, real bread’ and... jam

winston: “how did you manage to get all this?” jules has her ways... ;)

winston: “i want you” julia: “i want you too” YAS :D ♥♥

the thiccc singer is here!! :D

she’s so pretty! ♥

aww the stroke ♥

his hands are shaking as he touches her :(

winston: “freedom is the freedom to say two plus two equals four. if that is granted, all else follows” iconic!

YAS THE PAPER!!! :D

it be gin time ;)

he scratches the face off the gin bottle woah :o

I JUST REALIZED THAT THIS IS O’BRIEN :o

winston’s little ‘yes!’ at getting the 10th newspeak dictionary ♥

that’s a look of longing my friends! :o

winston: “the call has come. all my life i’ve been waiting for it...” and now he’ll go into the unknown... ;)

AAND we cut to naked julia eating an apple! slight bi panic

she’s touching the paperweight queen love it ♥

SHE KNOWS THE CLEMENS YAS!!! :D

julia: “i just know it!” BOI YOUR G-PA HELPED OUT

winston: “the only thing to do is to walk out of here before it’s too late” thus my ‘julia lives’ au comes in! :D

winston: “never seen one another again” ...oh he was talking about that NOT IN MY AU SON

julia: “you do, i do.” omg marriage :o

YAAAS JULSTON KISS!!!!!!! :D

fluffy! ♥

julia: “i love you.” awww :)

winston: “julia. do you think the resistance is real?” julia: “none of it’s real.” STRAWBERRY FIELDS FOREVER!

♥

OMFG THERE WAS AN EXPLOSION :o

work is scrambling like eggs!

poor headache bby! :(

epic B)

winston’s dreaming of his bishy selfish chocolate mom adventure!

the rats were there when his mom and sister were vaporized! :o

she’s in the dress! ♥

they’re talking about betrayal and julia’s like ‘they can’t do that!” OH BOI BUT THEY CAN!!!!

julia: “they can’t get to your heart” aww :)

awkward...

winston sees o’brien WITHOUT JULIA THE F????

this feels like the principal’s office lol :D

o’brien’s voice is so deep and british ♥

the way he clutches the newspeak dictionary is so cute! :D

aww he’s stroking the pages as he reads :)

the oceania anthem sounds russian :o

YAAAAAAAASSSS!!!!!!! :D

so soft ♥♥

winston: “julia, my love.” MY LOVE MY LOVE AHHH!!!! :D

YEES THE COFFEE SMILEEE!!!!! :D

she’s hungry... she wants coffee... who’s gonna tell her coffee isn’t food?

omg i saw winston butt :o

winston: “she’s beautiful.” julia: “she’s a meter around the hips easily” winston: “that’s her standard of beauty.” YAAAS!!! :D

winston: “the future is ours.” YAS

OH CRAP THEY SAID ‘WE ARE THE DEAD’ NOOOO

mr. charington is loud compared to how i thought in the book

his ‘you are the dead’ should’ve been quieter like winston and julia’s then he could be loud!

FBI OPEN UP!!!!!

charrington: “here comes a candle to guide you to bed, here comes a chopper to chop off your head!” OHHHH NICE ONE MR C!!!!!! :D

RIP TO A QUEEN :’(

i should be a bit more heartbroken BUT THAT MR C RHYME MAN

OMFG THEY JUST BEAT UP JULES

SHE’S IN SO MUCH PAIN NOOOO :’(

why does he look old

awww :(

delete the drunk old lady BUT GIVE US PARSONS SUUURE

i dread the scene to come...

parsons didn’t say that he said ‘down with big brother’ so that’s a bummer :/

aww poor parsons he’s crying! :(

oh SNAP room 101!!!! :o

poor parsons but at least that scene wasn’t a thing!

OUCH THAT SMACC LOOKED LIKE IT HURT

is this leading into the bloody mouth scene? I STILL NEED TO KNOW WHAT THAT IS

winston doesn’t know where he is IT’S THE I WANT YOU VALLEY!!!

hold up this is just a vision ok BUT WHERE’S THE BLOODY MOUTH SCENE

frankenstein and spirit halloween called!

also o’brien flipped the switch without warning BISH

o’brien: “you suffer from a defective memory” and you suffer from a BISH MEMORY SIR

remember winston it’s all in the mind... ;)

WHY DID O’BRIEN SHOCK WINSTON HE SAID FIVE

'how many fingers’ is a trick question because winston sees four YET WE SEE FIVE OHHH

mother gothel vibes...

awww winston’s little scared squeak :(

winston: “i don’t know... i don’t know!” SAY FIVE WINSTON SAY FIVEEEEE

o’brien’s voice is so calming yet it spouts evil words...

julia immediately betrayed winston BECAUSE SHE HAD A ROSEMARY KENNEDY yet she’s somehow still alive without damage by the end???

ooh a new shot! :D

they just faded to black and showed a new angle which is a bit weird...

o’brien: “you’re thinking that my face is old and tired...” because it belongs to poor richard burton!

o’brien just yoinked winston’s tooth out tho :o

mother gothel strikes again!

winston to o’brien: “i love you.” you don’t say that back to jules YET YOU SAY IT TO O’BRIEN BOIIIII

o’brien: “you’re one of us. one of the chosen.” one of us gooble gobble! also ANAKIN IS THAT YOU????

winston just said ‘i love you’ oMG OMG OM WAIT WWAIIITIT

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

seconds after she says ‘i love you too’ SHE’S FREAKING SHOT DAAANG NO PUNCHES PULLED BACK!!!!!

aww he called her ‘my love’ even in a dream

so that was the infamous bloody mouth scene and it was quicker than i thought it would be? at least i have a bright julia smile! ♥

OMG winston’s calling for her yet it sounds so weird WHYYY

he’s much improved!

they’re skyping lol

after all he’s been through he still hates bb! :o

ROOM 101 :o

room 101 is a personalized experience just for you! :D

also IT’S A DREAM MIRROR

omg the rats are GOING AT EACH OTHER GEEZ

winston’s squeak at the rats no!!! :(

‘do it to julia’ sounds a bit selfish but it’s the betrayal we’ve been waiting for!

...NOT

uh oh here comes the awkward reunion...

they should’ve said “...sup.” to each other

the bartender saying “on the house!’ tiredly each time is great :D

winston: “thank you for coming.” julia in her thoughts: “yeah whateves bro.” :/

at least they can still bond over something :)

jules gin time ;)

they ratted out on each other true love???

julia: “we must meet again.” winston: “yes, we must meet again.” ...they never met again

but if they did it would be a bro time!

winston: “i have seduced party members of both sexes” BI NANI???? :o

since his crimes are like the guy’s from earlier... what if he didn’t do them and was convinced that he did? :o

in the book he says i love you to bb, but here he turns away and says it... what if he still loves julia? :o

and with that question, the movie has come to a close! it’s a fantastic little film that closely follows the book. while i would’ve liked to see julia with winston at o’brien’s and the drunk jail lady, the cutting of the gross parsons scene, the addtion of the bloody mouth scene and the possibly hopeful ending make up for it. overall, this is an amazing adaptation of such a great book! :D

#livewatch #i bet this is just as good as the book! :D

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justalittlelitnerd · 4 years ago

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What If It’s Us by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera

“I don’t know if we’re a love story or a story about love. But I know whatever we are that it’s great because we kept jumping through the hoops in the first place.”

I didn’t think this story could possibly be cuter than I expected to be but it was. It far surpassed my expectations with it’s quirky, insecure ensemble of characters and the story was written in a way that convinced me to accept such an open ending when usually that’s my biggest pet peeve.

Overall, this story is just a fun take on a whirlwind summer romance because it pulls in all the weird, slightly crazy aspects of modern dating like missed connections and the ease of internet stalking. It was exactly what I needed as a counterbalance to the dumpster fire that is 2020 and if you’re looking for that brief escape into a wholesome, awkward romance and story about first loves and second chances and the complexity of dating and friendships than I would highly recommend!

My only semi-complaint were the issues within Arthur, Jessie, and Ethan’s friendship could’ve been fleshed out more to do justice to the time the authors took to flesh out the side characters and their relationships with the main characters. I felt like that fight didn’t balance out the fight Ben had with Dylan because it was clear how that disagreement was building over the course of the summer. Also it felt too obvious that Jessie and Ethan were secretly dating and I was confused and unsatisfied by Ethan’s explanation that he didn’t text Arthur back the whole summer simply because it felt like lying and didn’t think twice about how ignoring Arthur (especially right after he came out) would make him feel. Also the whole time it made it seem like Arthur and Jessie were slightly closer and she had no qualms texting him and lying to him all summer and let’s just say I’m not as forgiving as Arthur was.

Let me know your thoughts!

Keep reading for some fun quotes I saved!

Normally, being an intern is more boring than terrible, but today’s uniquely shitty. You know that kind of day where the printer runs out of paper, and there’s none in the supply room, so you try to steal some from the copier, but you can’t get the drawer open, and then you push some wrong button and the copier starts beeping? And you’re standing there thinking that whoever invented copy machines is this close to getting their ass kicked? By you? By a five-foot-six Jewish kid with ADHD and the rage of a tornado? That kind of day? Yeah.

I believe in love at first sight. Fate, the universe, all of it. But not how you’re thinking. I don’t mean it in the our souls were split and you’re my other half forever and ever sort of way. I just think you’re meant to meet some people. I think the universe nudges them into your path.

Ex-boyfriend. Which means Box Boy dates guys. And okay. Wow. This doesn’t happen to me. It just doesn’t. But maybe the universe works differently in New York. Box Boy dates guys. I’M A GUY.

It’s weird—now I want to prove it. I want some gay ID card to whip out like a cop badge. Or I could demonstrate in other ways. God. I would happily demonstrate.

“On the sad scale, how are you feeling today?” Dylan asks. “Opening-montage-of-Up sad? Or Nemo’s-mom-dying sad?” “Whoa, no. Definitely not opening-montage-of-Up sad. That shit was devastating. I’d guess I’m somewhere in between, like last-five-minutes-of-Toy-Story-3 sad. I just need time to bounce back.”

“Let’s talk about why you really didn’t mail the breakup box,” Dylan says, like he’s going to bill me for this conversation. “Only if you drop the therapist voice,” I say. “Maybe we can begin with why my tone bothers you. Do I remind you of an authority figure?”

I’m certain that I’m 100 percent gay because if I was even 1 percent bisexual I would be crushing hard on Samantha for looks and high energy alone. Dylan watches Samantha as if she were glowing, and I wonder when I went dim for Hudson. If I ever really glowed for him at all.

“I would love to start my own app games. I have this one idea. It’s like Frogger, but instead of heavy-traffic streets, it takes place on the sidewalks of New York. You die if you get hit with someone’s shopping cart and you lose points if you cross a tourist’s path while they’re taking photos.

Emotional blue balls. That’s what it feels like. It’s being handed everything you’ve ever longed for, only for it to slip through your fingers. And there’s no way to fix it. Nothing you can do but slink toward the kitchen counter in a full-body mope.

"You’re not being fair to yourself,” Dylan says. “Maybe not. But I’m being honest.”

It’s this strangling fear that we’ll be sitting there and we’ll run out of something to say and I’ll be able to witness the exact moment someone falls out of love with me because I don’t have enough substance to keep a conversation alive over a meal. Why would you want to talk to me for the rest of your life?

But no. Not even close. Instead, it’s me bleeding out all my neuroses, looking for answers to questions I have no right to be asking. But I don’t know how to make myself stop asking them. People like me should come with a mute button.

I have only said one word on this call—a call I made—and I’m already ready to settle into another few hours of Arthur rambling. It’s better than my favorite Lorde and Lana Del Rey songs.

“You can sing a different song next time,” I say. I like that we’ll have a next time. That even though things have gone wrong, we’ve tried to make it right. “So I was nervous to admit this at karaoke, but—” “Please don’t tell me you’re actually a bunch of rats wearing a cute boy as a disguise.” “Worse.” I take a deep, dramatic breath. “I haven’t listened to Hamilton.” He doesn’t say anything. Then the line goes dead.

I tell him how I want to write Hamilton and Harry Potter crossover fanfiction and call it The Great American Fantasy Novel and stage all those duels in the dueling club and what houses I would sort everyone in.

“All history should be taught through rap by Lin-Manuel Miranda.”

“How lucky we are to be alive right now, right?” “Oh my god, you’re speaking Hamilton—I’m just so into you. I’m helpless.” I’m so into him too.

“For the most part, I think. But every city has its assholes.” I want to hug him, but he doesn’t want to be touched right now. Like any affection is going to become a target sign on our backs. Like we’ll get punished because our hearts are different.

But it’s just like the old posts on Instagram that I can’t get myself to just delete. Like Hudson never happened. Like he’s someone to be ashamed of. And throwing away the good memories feels like a slap in the face to our history. It has nothing to do with the future.

When the song ends, I’m ready to apologize. But Arthur takes my phone and looks up a cover of “Only Us” from Dear Evan Hansen, and he comes closer to me as he sings the words “So what if it’s us, what if it’s us, and only us.” This song is so beautiful. What it feels like to be wanted by someone who sees you for who you are. How the world—the business of Times Square—can feel like it’s falling away when you’re with the right person.

But maybe this isn’t how life works. Maybe it’s all about people coming into your life for a little while and you take what they give you and use it on your next friendship or relationship. And if you’re lucky, maybe some people pop back in after you thought they were gone for good.

Maybe I’m feeling masochistic. Or maybe I’ve unlocked the secret, and this is how people focus. All you have to do is have a cute boy rip your heart out, then let your best friends stomp all over it, and if it’s still beating even a little bit, finish the job yourself. Say the worst things and yell your voice raw and destroy everything you love until, lo and behold, the monotony of work is a relief.

I don’t know how to tell Hudson that I want to throw away a box of things that used to mean everything to me. But that fucking box. I can’t keep treating it like something that belongs in a museum’s exhibit specializing in one guy’s history of breaking hearts.

“Do not ask any what-if questions about you and Hudson dating again. That would probably end in literal heartbreak at the hands of someone pretty familiar with the law because of his summer internship but too reckless to care.”

It’s hard to be a fully functioning Arthur when your heart lives in four envelopes.

I can’t lose you forever. You can’t be someone I just knew for one summer. I have to know you every summer.

#what if it's us #Becky Albertalli #adam silvera #ya #young adult #summer romance #mlm #nyc #coming of age #friendship #books #book quotes #book blog #booklr #quotes #just some softbois falling in love during a summer in nyc #lots of hamilton references

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rora-s · 4 years ago

Text

The Derivative Chapter 7: Commonalities

Chapter 1 <- Chapter 6

“You know I think the fact that I’m not even questioning the giant projector screen with Alexander Hamilton’s face on it in the living room means that I’ve been living with you guys way too long” I muttered, tossing my bag on the couch as I entered the house.

“Hello Abby” Uncle C greeted with a chuckle as he looked over the screen and began to mark one of the two versions of Hamilton’s face on the screen.

“Whattcha doing?” I inquired.

“The FBI is working on a counterfeiting case and I’m helping determine the differences between some old fake bills and new fake bills made by the same counterfeiter” he explained, pointing out which one of the Hamiltons was which.

I looked over the image “check in the center of his brow” I advised.

Charlie looked up and quickly circled the defect. “Thank you” he murmured, circling another difference on the treasurer's nostril.

“Hello” Don called in greeting as he entered the house.

“Hello” Charlie muttered in response.

“Hi,” I greeted.

“What are you doing?” Don asked, eyeing the projector.

“I’m running a comparison between the counterfeit bills you found earlier today and the older bills that that secret service agent lady gave us.” Charlie explained “there’s a possibility that the small differences may yield some data about their current operation. By the way, I did not mean to cause a problem earlier.'' He added the apology in right along with his sentence.

“You don’t have to apologize for anything” Don objected “I mean Agent Hall and I are- are- I mean, we worked it out. So…” Don dismissed the issue with a sigh. “You know if I left a box of stuff here?”

“What kind of stuff?” Charlie inquired.

“It’s just this one box in particular.” Don explained “when I moved back from Albuquerque. I thought I got everything, but it’s not in my apartment. I can’t remember where I put it” he turned to me “have you seen a box of my stuff”

I shook my head “I wouldn’t know what it was if I had”

Don nodded “you check the garage?” Charlie suggested.

“Yeah” Don replied then the front door opened “that you Dad?” he called heading over. “Hey let me get the door” he offered, helping Alan whose arms were full of groceries.

“You must have some kind of sixth sense.” Alan declared “I buy rib-eye and you just materialize”

“Well actually…” Don started then paused “you say rib-eye?”

“Yeah” Alan nodded.

“With, like, a baked potato?” he asked Alan just chuckled then he spotted Charlie’s set up.

“Oh, very nice, Charlie” Alan sighed “so how long is this going to be?”

“This is just for a few days.” Charlie assured as Don took a seat. “I needed to look at this as soon as I possibly could” Uncle C knelt at his computer and changed the screen to the upper right hand corner of the bills “Now the spiral patterns in money are based on a technique called guilloche. It’s like a wheel within a wheel within a wheel; a pattern created by the additions and multiplications of nested sine waves. Same was used by Faberge to create those little famous eggs”

“Oh well that explains it” Alan muttered and I chuckled.

“What does this have to do with the case?” Don questioned.

“I think they have a new artist,” Charlie declared, “in fact, I'm sure of it.”

“How can you tell that?” Don asked

“I’ve been running a wavelet analysis of these spirals I’m talking about.” Charlie informed “mathematicians at Dartmouth use a similar process to test authenticity of masterpiece paintings. Here, look it..” Charlie reached into his pocket and pulled out a real ten “alright ten dollars. Now we don’t often think about it, but someone must’ve drawn this design, right?”

“You’re right?” Don nodded.

“I want you to think of that artist as a runner on the beach” Charlie gave the visual “he’s leaving footprints which record every decision he makes; faster, slower, closer to the water, farther away. Now these,” he gestured to the screen “are counterfeit bills, a second artist trying to copy the original. A second runner. Now, when that second runner tries to follow the exact same path as the first, it’s impossible. Even if he’s being careful he can’t match the footprints without leaving evidence of himself. Different foot size, different stride, that’s how you spot a forgery. And when a third runner tries to match the footprints, he’ll leave evidence as well, but in a different way than the second runner.” Charlie explained “these two counterfeit bills have two different footprints.”

“Hence the new artist.” Don inferred.

“You find that artist..”

“Charlie we can’t find the counterfeiter,” Don objected “let alone the artist”

“You keep on saying he’s an artist, this guy.” Alan spoke up “he’s not really an artist is he? He’s more like a copier”

“Well he has to have some skill to draw something so detailed” I commented.

“It’s actually, it’s more like being able to draw, you know say, the Mona Lisa. freehand.” Don supplied.

“Oh I see” Alan muttered picking up the grocery bags and heading toward the kitchen.

“What I can do now, Don,” Charlie continued “is to take this initial comparative analysis and…”

Don was no longer listening to Charlie instead he got up and pulled out his phone. “Hey David it’s Don. Look, I want to expand the search, okay? Not just counterfeiters, but art forgers. Yeah alright” he hung up the phone and turned to his brother “good work” he declared before heading after Alan into the kitchen.

“I think we gave him an idea,” I told Charlie.

“I think you’re right,” the man agreed.

_______________

The cafeteria was probably my least favorite place in school. At least in the back of the classroom I could tune people out and it was mostly quiet. In the cafeteria everything was loud, people were moving and cliques ran rampant.

I took my tray and headed toward a booth in the corner that was empty. I was almost there when something caught my foot and I fell to the ground, my tray clattering and spraying the chicken noodle soup I had been about to eat everywhere.

“Watch where you’re going reject!” A girl who had been splashed by my food snapped standing straight up.

“Really making a habit of this huh street rat?” the girl who had made it a habit to trip me asked from behind as I got to my knees.

“You could really stand to come up with better insults” I voiced casually keeping the anger out of my voice “you know I’ve been called some pretty creative things and you just ain’t cutting it”

The girl who’d tripped me scoffed. “This shirt was designer” the girl I had gotten soup on screeched.

I looked at the blue and white striped top “sorry but I think you got ripped off” I pointed out without thinking.

“Hey you trying to pick a fight?” a boy asked standing up behind the girl.

“No, I'm just trying to eat lunch,” I replied cautiously, starting to stand.

“Yeah well if I were you I’d scram” he told me. I held up my hands in a defensive gesture and reached down to collect my tray. A hand grabbed my bicep yanking me back “I said scram”

I was tossed back into the girl who had tripped me who launched me forward back toward the guy who was stepping forward fists clenched. “A street rat like you shouldn’t be here” the girl behind me snapped.

“Yeah and a bitch like you shouldn’t be gifted vocal chords looks like nobody wins” I countered looking back at her.

“Why you little-” she threw a punch that caught me in the jaw. I started to go down but grabbed her down with me.

People had started chanting and gathering as we wrestled on the ground pulling hair, punching, and kicking. I had the upper hand by the time I was being grabbed and pulled off her by a pair of teachers.

“Enough!” Clive yelled, stepping between us. As the other girl got helped to her feet all I could think was that I shouldn’t have taken Don’s deal.

________________

3rd POV.

“That’s what I’m thinking,” Don murmured. The group began to disperse heading to fill out reports and gather more information connected to this new finding. Don was about to follow when he got a call.

He glanced at the phone and was surprised to see it was the number of his daughter’s school he sighed before answering “hello”

“Hello Mr. Eppes this is Mrs. Clive I’m your daughter Abby’s teacher. We’ve talked before” the woman on the other side answered.

“Yes I remember” Don replied already getting a bad feeling “is she okay?”

“For the most part” The woman sighed, sounding tired from what Don could tell and slightly annoyed? “She was involved in a fight today at school during lunch”

“She what?” Don asked immediately, agitated. “What happened?”

“It was an altercation incited by some other students in the cafeteria” Clive explained “witnesses and video confirmed that the other girl threw the first punch but she’s still going to be having detention for all of next week”

Don let off a breath his initial anger cooling “do I need to come pick her up?”

“No she’ll be finishing out the day as normal but I would suggest talking to her about it” Clive stated “she’s right here”

Don shook his head “yeah put her on”

“Hello Donald” Abby muttered into the phone.

“You alright?” he asked first.

“Yeah I’m fine. Bloody lip some bruising, girl wasn’t that tough” Abby replied and he could visualize her shrugging as she said it.

“What happened to making friends?” Don inquired.

“I tried. I got punched” Abby muttered bluntly “does this negate the deal?”

Don sighed “we’ll negotiate the finer points of the deal later” he paused “how’d the other girl turn out?”

“Worse then me” Abby muttered and he heard the slight pride in her voice.

“I don’t want to get more calls at work about you getting in fights” Don stated “but good job defending yourself”

“Thanks Don” Abby replied a smile in her voice.

“Yeah kid see you later” he told her.

“Bye”

He hung up and pocketed the phone. “What was that about?” Don turned surprised to find Kim looking at him from where she had been gathering files. He hadn’t realized she was still in the room.

“My daughter got in a fight at school,” he explained.

“Daughter?” Kim questioned straightening in surprise.

“Uh yeah” Don muttered realizing how odd this was going to be to explain. “She’s sixteen. Me and her mother were together in college. I didn’t know until her mom died and she was sent to live with me two months ago. Her names Abby”

“Abby” Kim nodded “you’re a dad. That’s uh that’s not really something I expected to find out”

“Yeah me neither” he joked lightly there was an awkward silent moment between them and he took the moment to retreat from the room.

______________________

Abby POV.

“You got in a fight at school?” Alan asked the minute I walked through the front door.

I sighed “I didn’t start it.”

“Don called and told me” Alan explained “what happened?”

“Girl punched me. I punched back. She got suspended. I got detention” I muttered tossing my backpack on the couch.

“Well why’d she punch you?” Alan pressed.

I shrugged “she likes to trip kids she doesn’t like going through the halls and call them names I called her one back and she couldn’t take it”

Alan sighed “Abby, you have to be the better person. Turn the other cheek”

“My innate ability for sarcasm doesn’t really lend to that” I told him. “Where’s Uncle C by the way. I want to ask if I can help on the case”

“I think he went downstairs,” Alan explained then looked at me closer. “Is your lips bleeding?”

I brought a hand up to my lip and touched it causing a little sting. “It's nothing serious” I assured and headed past him toward the basement steps.

Alan was right behind me. I descended the steps and looked to see Charlie pilfering through a box. “You sure you want to be looking through that stuff?” Alan spoke up behind me.

The younger man straightened over the box slightly, pictures in his hand “Dad, do you recognize this lady?” he asked, holding up the picture as me and Alan reached the bottom of the steps. Alan passed me and took the photo looking at it and I peered over his arm at it. The image was of my Dad and a woman with long brown hair. She was on his shoulders as he held up his arms proudly.

“Uh, yeah, it’s Kim, isn’t it?” Alan voiced.

“That’s Kim Hall,” Charlie agreed.

“Who’s Kim?” I asked.

“She and Don lived together in New Mexico” Charlie explained “and, uh, he never told me about it.”

“Well you know your brother.” Alan sighed.

“Why do I get the feeling my dad has a lot of ex’s” I muttered.

Alan made a face and nodded slightly as Charlie packed up the box. “You know we’d never heard your mother’s name until you showed up” Alan explained “Don’s just a very private person”

“I guess everyone has a right to be private” I conceded knowing there were things I hadn’t told them about me.

“Even to family?” Charlie sighed.

______________________

“Alright I’m back” Alan decreed, sitting down across from me and setting a bowl of popcorn on the table. “You didn’t move any of these when I wasn’t here did you?” he gestured to our chess game.

“No of course not” I replied annoyed as I grabbed a couple pieces of popcorn from the bowl.

“Alright what’s bothering you?” Alan inquired, moving one of his rooks on the board.

“What do you mean?” I replied sliding my bishop a couple squares.

“Well normally a comment like mine would have initiated a snarky response” Alan explained “remember your innate ability for sarcasm? Instead I got a short response. So what is the matter?”

“Nothing” I replied as he moved one of his pieces and I quickly countered him.

“Yeah right does this have something to do with the fight at school?” Alan inquired.

“No” I gave him a look “you might not want to hear this but this isn’t my first fight”

“Yeah I didn’t want to know that but somehow it’s not really a surprise” Alan sighed “check” I quickly countered the check. “Does it have something to do with Don and this woman?”

“I just don’t get it,” I voiced. Alan gave me a look and I sighed “It’s just, my mom and me we had this agreement that I wouldn’t lie to her and she wouldn’t keep secrets from me” I explained. “But it’s like with Don” I ended with a huffed breath.

“Donnie doesn’t really understand that when you have kids you have to talk to them.” Alan explained “now there are somethings that kids don’t need to know about but this woman coming back into his life I do think is something you need to talk to him about”

“He didn’t even mention her when we talked on the phone earlier” I commented.

“Well when you talked on the phone there was a more pressing matter” Alan pointed out. I let off a breath and nodded eating some more popcorn. “Abby, I have the feeling communication will never be your and Don’s strong suit but just ask him about it alright?”

“Alright” I muttered.

“Oh checkmate” Alan informed.

“Damn” I sighed “again?”

“Sure” Alan agreed and started resetting the board.

I looked into the bowl of popcorn before turning to my grandfather. “Do you have any peanut butter?”

________________

3rd POV.

“That’s the good part” Kim commented coming up to Don as they watched the woman who had been held hostage reunite with her husband.

“Yup” Don agreed.

“I forgot how much I missed that.” Kim voiced.

“It’s a good thing, right?”

“Yeah” Kim sighed “everyone’s already at Kinsella’s” she explained “Figure the Secret Service owes the FBI a few rounds if you want to come.”

“Well, actually, I got a bit of work to do here,” Don objected. “And I have to go get Abby from my dad’s house so”

“Okay,” Kim agreed “we are going to trip over each other again, Don.” she pointed out “if you and Terry can be partners, we can at least try to..”

“Yeah definitely” Don agreed.

“Okay. well” Kim sighed “first rounds on me.” She started to walk away but paused glancing back at the man “you know that kid of yours is pretty lucky to have you as her dad. I’m sure you’re great at it”

Don nodded and smiled as the woman left passing Terry as she went. “More interagency politics?” the man’s partner commented in passing.

_____________________

Don unlocked the apartment door and headed inside followed by Abby. “so you basically had three kids ready to fight you and you still made a snarky comment?”

Abby shrugged “the one girl was too prissy to throw down and I wasn’t sure the jock would hit a girl”

“Yeah well” Don muttered, getting into the fridge to get a beer. Abby paused leaning on the counter.

“So this Kim lady” she began and Don turned to her. “You guys were serious in the past right?”

“Yeah” Don nodded “we were”

“Okay” Abby bit her lip which stung a little since it was still cut and shifted on her feet. “You know me and my mom had this pact where we stopped keeping things from each other. And I don’t expect you to tell me everything. I mean I get not wanting to share but if anything comes up or like you know ex-girlfriends appear can you just clue me in. Please?”

Each word was specifically chosen, Don could tell. She’d been thinking about this. She must have found out from Charlie or Alan. Part of Don felt annoyed at the idea that his relatives had told her about this but he knew she needed to know things. Her life was dependent on his now.

“Okay” he agreed. Abby nodded with a slight smile. “Still you might want to put a lid on that attitude of yours or next time you might deserve to get punched” Don advised lightening the mood.

“Hey I got it from you” the girl pointed out with a smirk before heading up the stairs to her room. Don sighed but a small smile came to his face.

The man headed over to the couch and clicked on the tv. He watched it as he heard Abby moving around upstairs and eventually settle before there was a knock on his door. “Don?”

He turned confused at his brother’s voice “Charlie?” he got up and headed to the door “you alright?” he opened the door to see his brother holding a box in his arms.

“Hey, I found this box. I thought I’d” he shuffled into the apartment.

“What? Bring it over at 2:00 in the morning?” Don questioned.

“Yeah” Charlie muttered looking around the apartment.

“Well keep it down Abby’s asleep” Don advised then he got a look at the box “what did you do? You opened it?” he took it away from his brother heading for the coffee table “what is with you, man? Even when we were kids, you were always going through my stuff.”

“You always had cool stuff” Charlie defended as Don sat down to look through the box's contents. His pace slowed as memories started to drift through his mind “seems like you left a lot of good friends back there, huh?”

“Yeah, well, family first. Right?” Don muttered looking in the envelope his search had really been pointed toward.

“Right” Charlie murmured, still hanging near the doorway. Don pulled the ring from the envelope and shifted it in his fingers. Then he remembered Charlie was there looking up, they locked eyes and then quickly looked away. Don dropped the ring back in the envelope.

“Look, I was going to tell you. I just..” Don trailed as he tried to gather his thoughts “I don’t know. I mean, we were in two different worlds. You know how it is.” Don sighed looking at a couple photos now “and mom got sick and… I don’t know.”

“I understand” Charlie murmured.

“Yeah?” Don looked for confirmation.

“Yeah.” Charlie nodded “I agree we’re from, uh from two different worlds”

“Well not so much lately” Don encouraged when he saw his father’s face fall

“Yeah” a small smile appeared on Charlie’s face to match his brother’s.

“See me all the time now.” Don pointed out.

Charlie nodded “I’ve learned a lot from you, actually” he confessed.

“Thanks” Don smiled.

“Okay,” Charlie shifted uncomfortably on his feet.

“You want to watch the rest of the movie” Don suggested pointing to the tv.

“Okay sure” Charlie agreed, easily coming to sit in the chair next to the couch.

“It’s a great flick” Don explained moving the box off the coffee table “it’s about baseball”

“The most statistically driven sport in the world” Charlie commented.

“You want a beer?” Don offered.

“No thanks” Charlie objected politely, eyes on the screen.

“Chip?”

“I’m okay”

Abby smiled from her place hidden on the steps. She could tell from the beginning that her uncle and father were from different worlds and she wasn’t sure which she understood more. Still she was glad they could find their common ground, maybe it held hope for a future where her own world made a bit more sense.

Chapter 8 ->

#numb3rs #Don Eppes #Alan Eppes #Charlie Eppes #amita ramanujan #Larry Fleinhardt #David Sinclair #Terry Lake #numb3rs season 1 #Episode Related #episode per chapter #Also posted on AO3 #also posted on quotev #Abby Calvin

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arigatouiris · 5 years ago

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red right hand // t.h — [02]

pairing: 1920s mob!tom holland x f!reader

warnings: swearing, violence, sexual references, mafia au!, mentions of ptsd, trauma, anxiety attacks, a dash of sexism, angst, slow burn, alcohol and smoking mentioned

word count: 2520

a/n: heavily inspired from this show i’ve been watching, the peaky blinders. the story won’t follow the plotline of the peaky blinders, but a fair amount will intersect. I find the interactions between tom and y/n to be so interesting because it reminds me so much of grace and thomas and ugh they are just the cutest

if you want to be on the taglist, just send an ask or drop a reply~

Two. A Song

▾

Tom only met (y/n) a few nights after that night.

He didn’t think about her the whole time, instead, he was trying to figure out where to hide the guns. On finding a safe spot, one of the storehouses whose keys only Tom had, his mind was currently at ease. However, building a plan to bring down London’s biggest bookkeeper, Charles Brown. His brother’s bar was empty that night, and as he sat in front of the bar, he ushered the new barmaid to hand him a drink.

“What drink would you like?” She asked, her voice smooth.

Tom looked up at her and blinked, his eyes callous and his mouth a straight line.

“You need to learn that yourself, love, if you haven’t already.” Tom snarled, not pleased with how hairbrained she was as a barmaid.

She stared at his face before pulling out a bottle from under the racks, and making him his drink. He watched her, her movements were graceful as if she had done this before, and a soft grin plastered on his face.

“You’re not from around here.”

“That much was already obvious,” (y/n) said, looking into his eyes, and then refocusing on the drink she was making. She slid it to him and he grabbed it, “I’m not from London.”

He took a sip before feeling the burn dance with his tongue. It wasn’t Tom’s regular drink but whatever it was that she gave him right then, he liked. The burn was cautious but dangerous, sending a slight shiver up his spine. It reminded him of a worry he knew he had long forgotten. A worry that perhaps didn’t exist anymore.

“So, where are you from?”

She hummed before saying, “Ireland. My father passed away a while ago, and I couldn’t stay there. Reminded me too much of him.”

Tom nodded once, before taking another sip of his drink.

“You didn’t poison this, did you?”

She grinned before replying, “If I had, you wouldn’t have been able to ask me that.”

Tom chuckled, before looking at her features. Her hair was long, her (e/c) eyes were sharp as if she had seen blood and gore before. She didn’t look even the slightest bit intimidated by Tom’s presence, perhaps it came from the fact that she did not know him or if she did, then she was not afraid.

He found it endearing, almost. She had this amazing aura around her which caught him off-guard. A girl’s innocence combined with a woman’s sensitivity. A charm that is alluring and attractive at the same time. Tom almost couldn’t look away.

However, the thoughts running in her mind were nothing on par with how Tom denied his attraction to the barmaid’s headstrongness. She was thinking over how she had been utterly and devastatingly honest with Tom just then, having not used the story she had spun in her head repeatedly. She was supposed to have come from a small town away from London, she was supposed to be the eldest of four daughters, she was supposed to have moved away after an abused marriage. Yet, the brown in Tom’s eyes had warded her off a path she had practiced to take—the brown in his eyes left her rooted, and she had no choice but to speak the truth.

She was afraid then, if the brown in those eyes would be the death of her.

She stole a couple of glances on how he looked at things. Tom had this strange wistful glance at everyday things—a sadness his eyes carried with him because his mind never could. She had never really seen such sad eyes before, and she had seen war-struck men, men returning to nothing waiting for them; she had seen the light go off in her father’s own eyes and nothing came close to how devastatingly sad Tom’s brown eyes were.

The pain in those brown eyes caused her to sway. And if there was only one thing she wasn’t allowed to do, it was to sway.

“Are you done staring at my face, barmaid?” Tom asked, amused.

She coughed once before turning her back on him, suddenly finding something to clean. She heard him chuckling behind her, the redness in her cheek gradually increasing in intensity. Even when he wasn’t saying anything, she felt his presence as strongly as she felt a crowd coming her way. Tom was, in hindsight, a very strong presence to be around. He was too much and too little, all at the same time.

“You were doing it the other day, too,” He said, taking another sip. “Staring at me.”

It was hard not to, considering he was her prime focus for the mission. Yet, perhaps, some part of her told herself it was the mission as she continued watching him. Tom’s movements were not aggressive, they were fluidic. Almost as if everything he touched was made of glass. It was a strange trait to have for a gangster, a strange trait to have for the leader of the Londoners.

“How could you notice?” She asked, her back still turned to him.

“What do you mean?” Tom finished his drink and tapped the glass twice on the table, indicating he wanted another one.

(y/n) turned around, begrudgingly, not willing to let Tom see her red face. However, once he did see it, no matter how silent smiles are, (y/n) could hear it ring in her ears.

“I’m very quiet.” She said, whispering. “I’m barely noticed—”

“I believe that’s bullshit,” Tom said, rolling his eyes, watching her make his second drink. “I don’t think just because you’re quiet you won’t be noticed.”

She paused, took a breath and licked her lips. She turned to look him right in the eye, red-faced and everything, and stole some of his breath away.

“Why do you say that?”

Tom looked straight in her eye before leaning closer to the counter. Their faces were closer than they were before but nowhere close enough to be called intimate.

“Just because you don't say much doesn't mean people don't notice you. It's actually the quiet ones who often draw the most attention. There's this constant whirlwind of motion and sound all around, and then there's the quiet one, the eye of the storm.”

(y/n)’s eyes were stuck in his brown ones, she was scared all of a sudden. She could see death in his eyes, and she could see the beginning of life. She saw sadness, which often masked everything he did—move, walk, talk, and even breathe, for that matter. She made his drink a second later, still not breaking eye contact, and let out a sigh before being the first one to look away.

“It’s amusing,” Tom said, taking another sip of his drink. “I can’t tell if you don’t know who I am or if you really aren’t afraid of me.”

“Oh, I’m afraid of you.” She said, a bit too fast, stunning Tom.

“Is that so?”

“...Not in the way you think. You scare me the same way a child is scared of something it’s not seen.”

Tom chuckled, before looking away and taking another sip of his drink.

“I wouldn’t call that fear—”

“Your eyes,” Tom paused at her sudden reply. “—your eyes scare me, Thomas Holland. Your eyes seem like they are friends with shadows, not with light. It says a lot more than just—”

In an instant, Tom grabbed her wrist before bringing it down to the counter. (y/n) winced before frowning, turning to look at him. His eyes were now angry, but it could barely mask the sadness in them. She wanted to laugh, but she knew the situation wasn’t appropriate.

“Do they look sad now?” He asked, his voice low and dangerous.

She smiled softly at him before reaching forward and touching his hand that was holding her.

“I can’t lie to you, Tommy.” She whispered a lie.

Shocked, Tom pulled away, frowning at her. Quickly downing his drink, he walked away from the bar, leaving her alone.

•

When Nikki was alone that Sunday morning, she didn’t think someone would come to her when she was sitting in the comfort of her home.

She knew her boys were off working, and it was the one day she would get to be by herself. However, she knew that when there was a knock on the door, it was not her boys but someone else who chose to disturb her peace.

Hamilton didn’t even greet her before walking in after she opened the door.

“I take it you’re a copper?” Nikki asked, laughing.

“Spare me your graciousness, Holland.” Hamilton spat, before turning around to face her.

Nikki gave him a cold look accompanied by a sweet smile. She often met death in the eye with a smile on her face.

“I know your son has the guns,” Hamilton spat. Nikki’s eyes didn’t widen. She didn’t give any sign that she knew what he was talking about. “I know your son has them hidden away somewhere.”

Scoffing, “Should I even play along with your nonsense?”

“I need to meet with your son, Thomas. I know he’s the ringleader in this circus of yours.”

“What for?” Her tone suddenly changed, and Hamilton noticed.

He walked over to her and glared at her, however, something about the aura she put off stopped him from taking a step further.

“I want to speak to Tom or I’ll simply learn more on my own regarding this gun matter.”

Nikki ushered him to leave with her hands, chuckling as he walked out. Her eyes hardened the second she knew she was alone, a curse coming out of her mouth. Grabbing her coat, she quickly walked out of her house and rushed to where Tom was—the official Holland bookkeeping office, and she didn’t bother to knock.

Tom stared at her furious presence, before knowing something was wrong. He watched as she closed the door, locking themselves inside.

“What’s—”

“The head of the coppers knows about the guns.”

Tom frowned. He knew the coppers would notice, but not this soon. And how were they so sure that it was the Hollands? It didn’t make sense.

“I told you, Tom. I told you there may be a rat. I told you that it’s a dangerous game. You never listen. You think listening is beneath you, but look at what’s happened. If something happens to this family, I—”

“Mother, shh,” Tom rushed to her and held her face in his hands. He cupped her cheeks and smiled sweetly at her, “I have a plan.”

“And what is this goddamn plan?” Nikki snapped.

“Charles Brown,” Nikki blinked. “Head of the bookkeeping here in London. If he’s out of the game, we can march in. I know we can’t budge him the way we are right now, but we can slowly expand our control into the inner city. We need this, mum. I’ve got this.”

Somehow, the lull that Tom brought about with his voice seemed to calm her down. She placed a hand on his, which was on her face, and patted it twice.

“I’ve been invited to the race held at his track next week,” Tom said, smoothly. “If everything goes smoothly, and we get close to him, we can get our papers signed. And once that’s done—”

“We’ll be legal. But, Brown won’t like that we’re using him.”

Tom nodded, “He won’t. Which is why he won’t be in the picture anymore. That’s what the guns are for.”

Stepping away from her son, she watched him. Nikki had no idea Tom could be this cunning, but somehow, a strange pride filled her heart upon his sudden growth.

“I’m going to let the coppers have them. In exchange for dirt on Brown. I know four of his tracks are not legal, and he smuggles contraband from Ireland and Wales into London through those tracks. Giving the guns and this piece of information to the coppers would leave Brown out of the race.”

Nikki’s eyes widened. There was no way the police could ever refuse an offer so irresistible. This was the offer Tom was talking about all along.

•

It was another slow day at the bar.

Tom walked in right after telling his brother Sam he needed a drink. Apparently, Sam had to meet with someone (he knew it was a woman), and Tom left him to his own devices. The second he stepped inside the bar, he thought of the barmaid.

It was strange. He found himself thinking of her at random times—when he was about to pour himself a drink at his chambers or when he was looking at a flickering light, or when he was alone and no one around him. The thought of her could especially not be avoided when he entered the bar. There she was, upon seeing him she shot him a shy smile, and Tom remained stoic.

“The same drink?”

Tom wanted to scoff at her question. He realized one thing was certain, if she wasn’t afraid of him then he can use her. He looked up at her and nodded once.

“There’s a race next week,” His voice was smooth. “I want you to come with me.”

Her eyes widened. This was nearly not enough time to even be asked such a thing. What did Tom even know about her that he wanted her, a simple barmaid, to tag along? It made no sense. She was afraid that he had some ulterior motive since it was Tom Holland after all, but she was still tempted to go.

“I don’t have a dress.”

Tom chuckled, “How many do you want?”

She turned to look at him cautiously. “I’ll come,” Tom eased into a comfortable position, “Only if you allow me to sing.”

His eyes turned cold. No one bargains with Thomas Holland, and yet, here she was, not backing down. He had grabbed her wrist the last time and threatened her, yet, he couldn’t understand what she was trying to do. She was smiling softly at him now, a playful look in her eye. He scoffed before rolling his eyes, but just then, he heard her start singing and his eyes widened.

“T’was early one morning a fair maid arose, and dressed herself up in the finest of clothes,” Tom wanted to stop her. He wanted to. He almost reached out just to stop her, but he couldn’t find the strength in his heart to do it.

So he watched her. Paled and disarrayed, the sound of music in his ears, the sound of her voice singing just for him gave him a rush he never knew he needed till then.

“And off to the shoemaker’s shop sure she goes, for the kiss in the morning early…”

“I don’t know if it’s innocence that you don’t know who I am, or if you’re really that brave…” His voice was low, but not intending to be.

She smiled bitterly, “It isn’t either, Tommy,” He liked it when she called him that, “I’ve just got nothing left to lose.”

▾

series taglist:

@cyrusandhiscollaredahirts @plaidamoosette @rachaeldonnaspiteri1 @tanya-diggory @myheartonthemove @watson-emma @souldancerr @tomsirishgirl @averyfosterthoughts @yourwonderbelle

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rainbow-filmnerd · 4 years ago

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Another Top 5 Favorite Sanders Sides Videos (3/5)

In honor of the one-year anniversary of me watching Sanders Sides for the first time and becoming a Fander, I’ve decided to count down ANOTHER Top 5 Favorite Sanders Sides videos! If you didn’t see a video you think I should have discussed, be sure to check out the first list!

#3 is... “Putting Others First - Selfishness v. Selflessness Redux”

youtube

GENERAL THOUGHTS

This one ranked a little lower because of two reasons. First, I was kinda missing Virgil, but that’s just me being picky about wanting my favorite Side to appear. And second, I had a bit of trouble processing everything after the video was over. So much has happened, and I couldn’t register everything from the first half of the video as I watched the second half. XD

However, despite that, it was such a great episode! A lot of emotional moments will likely be addressed in future episodes, and from my understanding, there’s only a couple left in this second season. I really did admire the fact that some of the scenes were parallels to SvS. Just overall, one heck of a doozy!

FAVORITE PARTS/LINES OF DIALOGUE (in no particular order)

That 8-bit video game art. John Stratman, that work that was put into this video to bring the video game aspect of it to life was AMAZING!

All the cameos of Leslie Odom, Jr. Now, I’ve never seen or heard Hamilton, but I think it’s cool that Thomas got him to be featured in this video.

All the “F” jokes and f-bomb teases. Also, I like the gold coin as the censor beep.

“I don’t want Thomas to croak! That’s my job.” *croaks*

Janus’s name reveal. Not something I saw coming, but what kinda threw me off was Roman’s reaction. But that was because I didn’t realize that it was “Janus”, the two-faced Roman God, and not “Janice”, the Friends character portrayed by Maggie Wheeler.

Janus snapping back wasn’t any better, but it was still an impactful moment.

“We should start looking into ways to PREDICT THE FUTURE!!!” “No!” And then whatever Roman said in that voice.

“Video games mean so much indoor time, that they should cause a little OUTDOOR time! Don’t you think?” “Ehhh…”

Patton hopping aboard on the “taking terms too literally” train after Roman asked Thomas who “gave him the jump” when his car broke down.

“Okay... I understand, now, that I have been.... a little-.” “Much?” “The mayor of Much-kin Land?” “... Sure.”

Patton and Janus’s interaction at the endcard scene.

Janus’s “Ah, d-d-d-d-DOY!”

“Jesus Christ Superstar!” That just reminds me of my Dad, because he likes that musical.

“Roman... I only mean well when I say... that is the stupidest thing you’ve ever said.”

The 8-bit video game music. From the theme song, to the main score for the characters. I love that detail.

“He’s the actual snake on the plane! And I, for one, am tired of this MORALITY-FIGHTING snake on this METHAPORICAL plane!”

Patton calling out Thomas for not getting up sharp by calling it, “6am dull”.

“By the liquid lipstick of William Shakespeare...”

Roman’s cat-filled apartment scenario.

“Especially to Mrs. Snuffles. More like Mrs. Sniffles! Because of the allergy...”

Just the overall video game theme in this video. I got a few of the game references, but not all of them. I don’t really play video games. :P

“I mean... there’s an obvious right answer here.” “Please don’t tell me you’re going to wrestle Tony award-winning actor Leslie Odom, Jr. for a hot dog.” “What?! No! I’m going about my day!”

All the callbacks and references to Thomas’s works and the little cameos of his friends!

“Well, when is it enough?!” “.... Trees?” “No! Selfishness!”

Patton having his eyes closed when he says that “doing nothing is worse than doing something good for the wrong reasons”.

“Like, you’re such a Dad that it’s too much to handle sometimes.”

Janus’ entrance/reveal in this video. I think it’s my favorite entrance of his of the series.

“Ooooh! Ooooh! Reptilian Rapscallion! Reptilian Rapscallion! We got a Code Yellow!”

Patton misusing “factoid”.

“People are being hurt by this reptilian with scallions.” “No.”

Janus before he sank out. I am still a little wary about him, but oh my gosh, he was a complete DORK in that scene.

“Don’t make me regret trusting you! I don’t want to be stuck with an evil snake boy!” “You’re not stuck with an evil snake boy.... You’re just stuck with a snake boy.”

Roman trying to read the text on Logan’s Lowdowns, but it goes by too quickly. Every gamer’s struggle.

“Sometimes, we get this.” “A bagel?!” What?! No. Maybe.” I didn’t realize it was a parallel to the Valentine’s Day video, but it’s still silly.

Logan’s Nietzsche impression.

“He does have a stu-uper duper unique mustache.”

Every time we get to see one of “Logan’s Lowdowns”. Felt kinda sad that he feels like he could be a bother, but it was still cute to see an 8-bit Logan (and Janus disguised as Logan).

“I think I understand what it means... Deceit being a part of me.” “That’s cool, talk about me like I’m not here.”

Roman’s exit is HEARTBREAKING!!!

Logan’s “I’m so f**king done” face when Thomas said he “wouldn’t be wrestling Logan for a hot dog”.

Patton’s breakdown. The entire scene and the transtitions.

“So, that rule trumps the other rule?” “Roman!” “Eh?!” “You know we don’t like to use the “T” word in this house.” “Oh, sorry!”

Roman mouthing, “behooved”.

“Three out of four of those are normal for me... Do I have hypoxia right now?”

Thomas’s score (80085) and time (limited/being lost/poorly spent), and the 8-bit portrait of Janus.

“I don’t want to make you think you’re some-.” “Stupid, dirty, rotten, filthy-silly, billy, no-good for nothing, uh, white, urgh, rat-scandrel b*tch!”

We can all agree that the “Rhythm Redux” was a bop. The visuals were amazing to look at, and man, Thomas’s vocals were on point.

Thomas screaming at Lee and Mary Lee and shutting the door at their faces.

“Leslie offers up a reward.” “What’s the reward?” “Leslie’s famous cake!” “Phrasing?” “What? Leslie’s literal cake that he baked! Oh my gosh!”

Roman reaching over the text bar and selecting “ignorant”, and him slicing through the giant text box after it hit Patton. That editing is just well done!

“He didn’t mislead you on purpose, Thomas. I don’t think the little guy-. Or the big frog is capable of that sort of thing.”

Thomas realizing his neck was stiff when he turned to look towards Janus.

“In my head, I’ll just feel this way.” “What way?” “The way a groom might feel if he just watched as his bride ran away.” “... But you’re gay.”

Janus laying down the severity of Thomas’s mental health and the overall message of self care.

Patton’s high-pitched “Right?” sounds like a little dog bark.

#thomas sanders #sanders sides #sanders sides top 5 #selfishness vs selflessness #selfishness vs selflessness redux #putting others first #svs part two #svs redux

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