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cfrick · 2 years ago

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Here is 3 whole chapters worth of my robot writing in one very long post. You can also read all this and more in a proper format over on my neocities.

Click the readmore at your own risk.

The center felt almost alien after hours. Most of the lights were turned off to save power. Halls normally humming with bots were now empty, except for a lone cleaning bot shuffling room to room. It paid Viroid no mind as they walked through the maintenance wing.

Viroid had come up with a few ideas of what Xiph might want them for. Most of them were not great. Maybe they just wanted fewer witnesses around for when they ripped Vi’s head off. Or maybe xe’d figured out they were spyware and wanted to strap Vi down for interrogation. Would xe even bother to interrogate them, or would Xiphoid just pull out their memory drive and hook it up to xer laptop, surely the head maintenance bot would know how to do that. Or worse.

By the time Vi was done running back through their options, they'd been standing outside Ziphoid's office for 2 minutes. There was only one way to find out which was right.

Xiphoid passed the time waiting at their desk, fiddling with their fingers. The blade tools were their favorites, obviously, but trying out different arrangements was plenty fun too. They'd just unscrewed their last sharp finger when their door finally slid open. Xiph greeted xer guest with a smile. "Ah, Viroid! I'll be with you in just a minute, go ahead and take a seat." Xe waved a half-assembled hand at the spare chair, but Viroid didn't take the offer.

Before Vi could come out and ask what the hell they were here for, Xiphoid was one step ahead of them. "Y'know, I'm surprised you said yes earlier,” Xiphoid spoke casually, without looking up from their hand. “I didn't even get to tell you what I needed." They shot a quick glance at the other bot, just long enough to give a sly grin. "Are you that desperate to spend time with me?"

Vi sputtered. “Wh- What do- N- I’m not desperate??” They paused to let their processing catch up. “I just. Didn’t have much work today, figured whatever it is, I could help.”

Xiph just chuckled. "Uh huh." Xe tightened the connection on xer last finger, then held xer hand up to admire xer handiwork. Half of them were tools Vi couldn’t even name, but there were still plenty of sharp objects. Those they could guess the use for. They all moved in sync, bending and flexing as Xiph tested the joints. Satisfied, the repairbot finally turned their attention to their guest. Aperture eyes focused down on the Viroid as Xiph stood to their full height and approached. "Here, let's just get started."

The doctor put a firm hand on Vi’s shoulder and started guiding them to the center of the room, to the raised metal surface that acted as their workspace. Surrounded by small rolling surfaces, bright lights on adjustable stands pointing down like a spotlight. Viroid didn't know much about human medicine, but the image of an “operation room” came to mind. It was just as they’d feared. This was the end. Viroid dug their heels into the tile, tried to come up with a protest, but it was no use. Xiph pushed them down to sit on the table, then onto their back. With each contact made onto the surface, there was a click, and their body seemed to stick to the table, like a fly in a web. Looking up at the mechanical amalgamation of tools coming down upon them. Vi grabbed at it with a last free hand, but it was no use. The hand came to rest on their chest and had a sharp finger to their core before Vi finally spit out a clear: "Stop!"

The doctor froze. Neither bot moved from the position, Xiph's hand resting against Vi's core, Vi's hand gripping Xiph's wrist. Silence except for the gentle whir of their fans. Viroid genuinely hadn't expected that to do anything. And yet, Xiphoid had stopped, blankly watching them process. After what felt like an incredibly long moment, the doctor spoke up. "Why are you nervous?"

"'Why am I nervous?' I don’t know, maybe because you just started pushing me around with zero explanation?? What're all these tool fingers even for?" Viroid finally tugged the hand off their chest, shoving it back at the doctor as they shouted.

Xiphoid didn't seem to take offense, continuing to analyze xer patient's response, before concluding: "You've never had maintenance done before." At this, the doctor tilted xer head, looking quite surprised. "Are you really that new?" Vi's screen darted to look away, immediately confirming the answer. Vi was aware they’d been worked on a few times at their own facility, but it was before they'd been fully activated, so they had no memories stored of it. Even at this facility, as much as Viroid had been hanging around the maintenance wing, they'd seen very little of the actual process. Is this really common knowledge?

Seeing the embarrassment in their expression, Xiph took a more compassionate tone. "Hey, that's fair! I'm told the process is a bit strange for bots at first. Sorry, I'm so used to it myself, I forgot to take it easy." Xe took a step back, and the doctor’s usual stiff and strange posture loosened, making xer almost seem to shrink. Hands lowered and out of sight, head bowed with a smile, even the hair seemed to tuck itself back behind xer ear.

Xiph was genuinely being apologetic.

Vi wasn't sure how to respond. Especially when they were still locked to a table. "... You're fine. But uh… maintenance? Why would I need maintenance?"

"Oh you don't! I don't think so anyway, I guess we'll find out. No, I was just checking your file the other day, and I couldn't find your blueprints!"

Vi’s fan went up in volume, but Xiph didn’t miss a beat.

"It's not unusual for new models, the company really likes to take their time filing them, y'know, still staffed with humans up there and all." Xe rolled xer eyes with a smile. "But, I was worried about you needing repairs in the meantime, so. I thought we'd do a little reverse engineering, and I'll fix you up with a temporary one! My treat!" Xiph looked down at them, still quite excited, but Vi was still obviously stressed about the idea. Xiph attempted another gentler expression before adding, “Is that okay? We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

Viroid shifted as much as they could, still stuck on their back. Did xe really mean that? They weren’t sure, but… "I guess you did prove that with you... Actually stopping when I told you to."

"Of course! Oh, right, that's just a part of repairbot programming. Consent and all, helps prevent any accidental damage." Xiph waited patiently for a moment longer, the two staring at each other. Then Xiph remembered they have to explain everything. "... You do need to give me clear verbal agreement to continue. Is it okay if I continue?"

"Sure, uh, go ahead?"

Xiphoid paused a bit longer, hesitant. Then nodded. “We’ll work on that.”

True to their word, the doctor continued much slower, and gave a thorough explanation at each step. "I activated the table magnets, they're just to stop you from slipping off. You won't really need them once you're in maintenance mode. I need to open your chest panel to turn it on, though, like this-"

Ziphoid popped the panel off expertly, so fast Vi barely flinched, and handed it off to their hair to set aside. This was a new view for Vi. It was surprisingly organized, lines of wires and glowing tubes running out to each of their extremities, and underneath those, peeks of the steel structure holding them all together. And right in the center, connected to it all, was their core. It was only then that Viroid really processed it as the complicated device it was, churning away at a steady pace.

Rather than look at any of this, Xiphoid pointed at a miniscule switch on the bottom of their chest cavity. "And this is your maintenance switch! It's a little thing we repair bots can turn on to lock your joints, so you don't go wiggling around while I'm working on you." Vi took note of its position, listening carefully to the doctor's teaching. Vi watched them flick the little switch with a long finger. It didn't feel like anything had changed. They tried testing it by wiggling a finger, but sure enough, nothing responded. "It'll turn off your 'pain' response as well," Xiph continued as they settled into xer work. "Other than that, vision and communication and everything should work fine!"

For the first time since Vi’d walked in, the doctor was silent. Absorbed into the task of removing each piece, careful to keep everything important attached, taking note of what goes where. Vi finally started to relax as they watched the meticulous process.

They couldn’t be sure how much time had passed, but Viroid had thoroughly zoned out by the time the silence was finally interrupted. "I never had that nervous phase with maintenance," Xiph stated aloud, as if they'd been in the middle of a conversion. Vi looked up at the doctor, but xer eyes were still trained on xer task. The intense focus from earlier had lessened, and Vi noted in retrospect that xe had stopped blinking for a while. It didn’t seem like the doctor was exactly looking for a response, but Vi took the invitation for chatter anyway.

“I’m not surprised.”

Xiphoid grinned down at the mess of wires. “I’m definitely fine with it now, yeah. But back then, it was just because I didn’t feel anything. By the time I did feel, maintenance was just a regular thing. Probably for the best it worked out that way.”

Viroid’s screen displayed a question mark, unable to express much else, locked up as they were. “What, like. They activated you without emotions?”

“They activated me without a lot of things.” Xiph pulled out a mechanical piece Vi didn’t recognize and studied it closely, perhaps considering. Then continued, “Did you know I was a prototype?”

“Uh, no,” Viroid lied. They’d just read through Xiphoid’s files earlier in the day. They knew quite a few things about Xiphoid. It hadn’t mentioned anything about this seemingly unorthodox activation, though. There was certainly more to hear if they played dumb. “You were?”

“Mm-hm! First of my design,” The doctor beamed, as if very proud of the metal piece they’d just delicately placed aside. “I was built to build, to repair, to do everything my creators did and more, so instead of trying to program all that, the team just woke me up and taught me. They taught me everything I know.” Xiphoid’s hands stalled for a moment, pausing to think. Then they continued just as energetic as before. “Including emotions! Hence, the lack of a fear response at first. I just didn’t know how to be scared.”

“Huh.” Viroid recalled what they had learned already from the files. Fancy hair mechanics, custom modifications, they found an exact number for that awkward height. The file had mentioned the prototype thing, it was hardly a secret. The company had loved bragging about their special new bot when it was in development. In fact, Xiphoid's programming was one of the specific mechanic's Viroid was sent to investigate. Was learning all this top secret info really as easy as just sitting and talking with the bot? Sure, they are in pieces at the moment, but they didn't seem to be in any actual danger. Xiph must know so many company secrets, and they're perfectly fine handing them out?

"How come you haven't been shut down yet?" Vi's mouth started before they finished processing (or, more accurately, their voicebox did. their mouth joints were still frozen. but the effect was the same).

Xiphoid's movements paused at the comment. Xe stared off, processing something, or maybe just collecting xerself. Vi couldn't quite read xer face from the odd angle.

Uncertain, Vi tried to backpedal a bit. "I just meant. It's a bit reckless, isn't it? To leave you running around-"

Xiph suddenly turned to Vi’s face, making eye contact with the bot in pieces below them. Vi was grateful their limbs were locked, or they might’ve knocked all their machinery off the table by jumping. Even as the Xiphoid stared into them, the expression was still illegible. It was blank, but in a very purposeful manner, perfectly default. "What do you mean by that?" xe asked, voice betraying hints of their suppressed emotion. Anger. Vi had struck a nerve.

"I mean- It seems like. A security issue, you know?" Xiph's expression actually shifted a bit. Vi went on, "Because. Prototypes are part of the development process? Insider design details, out in the open. Just security bot stuff."

"Ah." Xiph was far more relaxed by the time Vi had given their full explanation. It was a bit more honest about their thought process than Vi had intended. But Xiph just seemed... relieved? Situation diffused. The doctor looked thoughtfully down at their work. They spoke at a low volume, "I’m the best maintenance bot this company has. They rely on me too much to have me shut down at this point."

Xiph glanced back at their patient, playful expression finally returned. "Besides, I don't think the company is worried about me getting stolen or anything like that."

"No?" Vi was happy to return this energy. "Well, I guess you're right. Nothing to worry about with bots like me around. Keeping an eye on you."

Xiph just grinned at the response, this time clearly showing off their teeth on purpose. "I appreciate the offer, security bot, but I'm quite capable of handling myself." They gestured down at Viroid's empty torso and the vital tech arranged beside it. "I may be built for fixing bots, but I'm just as good at taking things apart."

Xe had a point. Viroid was sure to note down this information. Seems their earlier fear wasn't entirely unwarranted.

There was a prolonged silence before Xiphoid processed why xe hadn't gotten a response. "Ah, sorry! Not a good conversation topic for surgery, is it. Ha ha." Xiphoid dropped into silence again and went back to moving pieces around. Viroid just focused on trying to relax again.

The period of silence stretched on. Xiphoid's sorting and reworking slowed to a stop, simply looking down at the careful arrangement. Then, finally, they began the process of putting the bot on the table back together, reversing their work as carefully as they’d done it. Viroid is quick to take note.

“Are you done?” Vi asked. Their eye followed the movements of each piece, returning into their chest.

This process was moderately faster, and apparently required less of the doctor's focus now that xe was properly familiar with the layout. Xe wobbled one hand in an unsure motion at the question. “Yyyes and no. I’m done looking at your main mechanics, that's the important part, but. There’s one other spot I wanted to check.” Xiphoid looked back up to their face.

“… Oh.”

“It won’t take that much longer! I just want a quick peek under the faceplate. So much of it is covered with your hair- And your eye! That little screen is an interesting design choice for expressions, but that isn’t where your actual camera is, right?” The doctor leaned in closer. Xe was very obviously excited about the prospect.

Vi was not. They hesitated.

"… I'll still be able to. Talk and see and all that?"

"Yep! It's the same set-up as your torso, I'll just be up at your face this time. And I won't go taking everything out either. The head tends to be much more tightly organized, not worth the risk of re-hooking up a sensor wrong. Like I said, just a peek!" They'd lost some of their compassionate tone in the middle, but the general thought was still somewhat reassuring.

Viroid's torso also probably had a lot less incriminating tech. Not that Vi knew much about their own internal mechanics, but they did know their head is where their radio was hooked up. Wasn't it?

At this point, they had little else to lose. It'd probably be fine. Vi would've shrugged if they weren't still locked up. "Sure- Uh. Go right ahead, doc."

Xiphoid smiled at the added nickname. A particularly sweet-looking one for Xiph, with no teeth. Then they jumped into action.

The doctor moved closer, standing right next to their head to where Vi's camera couldn't even turn to see. Not that they needed to turn to see Xiph, as xer face loomed over, scanning over every inch of Vi's own face. Taking it all in. Vi only realized the doctor was touching their face when they heard the quiet tapping of metal on metal, perfectly audible so close to their mic. Even here, their touch sensors were disabled.

The faceplate came off slower than their chest place had, precise, maybe even unsure, but it was swept away by Xiph's hair all the same as soon as it was disconnected. Vi assumed there was still touching happening, but this close to their face and with their sensors off, they had no way of tracking where exactly. Only the soft tapping of metal fingers doing meticulous work. Viroid's camera twisted to try and look inside itself, but it only served to catch Xiphoid's attention.

Viroid only had the one camera, hidden just at the edge of their "bangs," a little above the level of their screen eye. The movements it could make were small and entirely disconnected from their expressive display. This camera was intended to stay in its spot and give a full 360 degree dome of vision, excluding the blind spot where the bangs were too close to see around. And Xiph was very close to it. Staring directly into it.

Vi was suddenly very aware of their screen, so close to Xiphoid's cameras. Their display eye shifted back and forth uncomfortably, surely making it even more distracting. Not that Vi had much else they could do to alleviate their discomfort. They tried to focus on something else, look at something around the room.

This also had few options: Xiphoid was taking up their whole feed, still hovering over their camera. Vi had only briefly skimmed Xiphoid's actual blueprint details. Most of it was just your basic, boring model designs. Two flexible sections around the mouth for expressiveness, two cameras for proper three-dimensional environment mapping, perfectly symmetrical, all accounted for. The camera design itself was less common. More interlocking parts for expression as well as higher quality vision, more susceptible to damage or something. Vi could see the parts in action right above them, shifting and turning, as they had seen so many times before. Only at this distance did Vi hear the gentle whirring accompanying each movement behind xer lenses. Focusing and unfocusing on them.

No, not them. Xiphoid was looking at the camera. The camera and all the bits and pieces around it. When Xiphoid looked at Vi, it was with warmth, an almost uncomfortable cheeriness. Vi had seen it just a few minutes ago, when Xiph had so happily how xe was going to take their face off. This was different. This was Xiphoid focused in on a machine to take apart. None of the excitement that Xiph had expressed when proposing the idea was there. Just an intense stare.

Then Xiphoid grabbed hold of something inside and pulled. Even with the "pain" turned off, Viroid gave a sound of alarm as their vision cut out with a snap.

"... Oops."

"Did you break my camera?!"

"Just disconnected it, I think. Sorry, I thought it'd have more reach than that."

Down two senses now, Viroid had to rely on their hearing. Shuffling and clicking, hands moving quickly, but nothing Vi could really identify. Their mics always were pretty shit. Vi resorted to teasing to express their annoyance. "Aren't you supposed to be some. Supercomputer engineer? Best maintenance bot ever?"

"I am! Even computers make mistakes." The response sounded more like a kid's book directly stating its moral than an actual excuse. Like they were quoting something.

Another click and a snap, and Xiphoid's face was back, smiling over them. "There you go." There was a faint static still, but their camera was back in place. Vi tested their movement, shifting it until the static went away. When they focused back on the doctor, xe had a look of concern. "It didn't hurt, did it? I didn't mean to do that."

Vi considered the noise they'd made. "No, just. Surprising."

The doctor hummed in response, thinking. "I should've anticipated something would end up disconnected. Then again, that's not technically a pain response, even if it's unpleasant. I suppose there's no good way of stopping that besides just powering you down completely. That, or-" Xiphoid cut the sentence off abruptly. "Nevermind," xe spoke quietly and quickly went back to sorting through Vi's face. This time, they were entirely ignoring Vi's camera. Avoiding eye contact.

"What?"

"Hm?"

"Don't 'hum' me, you had some. Alternative thing you were gonna talk about." Xiph was pretending (poorly) to have no idea or interest in what Vi was asking. Xe tried to busy xerself with xer work, which was difficult when your work was the thing bothering you. Vi didn't let up. "You never censor yourself like that. You love saying weird. Stuff. What was that?"

Xiphoid drummed their fingers nervously on Viroid's torso. "It's just a part of a side project I'm working on, an extra mode of sorts. I'm really not supposed to talk about it, though. The project is to be kept on a need-to-know basis."

The bot's words didn't quite line up with their body. They'd given up on working to stare across the room, trying to find something else to look at. Their mouth twisted, their eyelids furrowed, their foot taptaptapped on the tile below. File details, repair methods, so much Xiphoid had happily rambled away about without an ounce of regret. And yet, whatever this was, it had them thinking for once. Something even Doctor Xiphoid wouldn't go rambling about, as much as they wanted to. Something upper management actually cared about. Vi tried to maintain their usual half-interested tone. "I mean. Sounds relevant to me. You already started bringing it up." Vi gave the doctor one last look over. "And you seem like you really want to talk about it."

"Hm... I suppose I could explain a bit about the extra mode." Xiphoid finally relented and looked back at Vi's camera. "And it wouldn't bore you, to hear me talk about my experimental tech nonsense?"

That's what xe cared about? "I don't mind. Go right ahead." Xiphoid responded with a smile, and took a moment to process where to start. Viroid took the moment to quietly tap into their radio, so they would be ready to start sending this information to... Their antenna was disconnected.

"Well," Xiphoid began, the moment of preparation over. No time to consider that. Vi tried to focus on the explanaition. "It started as an alternative to the actual maintenance mode, this one you're in now. In addition to locking your movements, maintenance mode also turns off your 'pain receptors,' as we've thoroughly tested already." Xiph tapped on Vi's chest again. "Normally, without the mode, your sensors for physical touch have set thresholds, and when those are met, or the sensors get disconnected, negative signals get sent out, comparable to the human sensation of 'pain.' This is in place to discourage damaging your body- but, of course, if they were active during maintenance procedures, you'd be screaming right now!" Xiphoid grinned like they'd made some sort of joke, but Vi didn't respond. "Of course, currently, the solution to this is maintenance mode, which just turns the sensors off completely, rendering you 'numb.' But what if, instead, we solved the problem in the opposite direction? What if instead of turning negative into nothing, we made the negative signals... positive ones!" Xiphoid checked back in on their singular audience member. "Does that make sense?"

"You mean like..." Vi considered the word choice carefully. The human equivalent of positive signals. "Pleasure?"

"Yes, exactly!" Xiph clasped their metal hands together, proud of their impromptu student. "And it'd be a very simple process to program, just changing around some numbers. I could have it set to something I can switch on or off, just like this maintenance mode, or have it only affect certain areas of receptors, or have different levels of strength. I mean, I'm surprised this sort of thing isn't already in use. Imagine, I do something like, well. Like ripping your camera out! And instead of feeling nothing, or pain, you felt… pleasure."

"... Why would you want to do that?"

Xiph stared blankly back down at Vi. Then they were avoiding eye contact again, busying their hands. "'It makes more sense in the context of the project, I suppose. Don't worry about it."

Xiphoid didn't share anything else about their project. The doctor went back to Viroid's face and putting it all back together. At some point in the process, Viroid's antenna got reconnected, but they weren't paying attention. They were thoroughly distracted trying to disect just what exactly they'd learned about, and how they were going to relay any of this information back to HQ. If they were going to relay any of it. Xiphoid gave some idle chitchat as they finished up, released their patient, and sent them back into the hall with a smile. Vi didn't catch any of it.

Vi was going to be thinking about this for a while.

#look im not gonna tag this as anything specific but there is a reason im posting this on my alt blog.#im so bad at telling when something crosses the line to nsfw. its just robots. theres no sex. doesnt mean it isnt hot tho.#my writing #my ocs #my robots ♡#xiphoid #viroid #im also posting this on quotev just because it is the only site i could think of that does original writing.#if you know of a better site to put this on please let me know.#toyhouse is very much not built for writing or sharing writing :/#robophilia

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