#and i hope this doesn’t come off as rude but

[dreamsteddie]

Can't Take My Eyes Off You

Written for the @stmarchmm day one prompt “courting rituals” | Tags: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Courting Rituals, Alpha Eddie Munson, Omega Steve Harrington - Also on Ao3

Bat divider -@popmilky | Diamond divider - @inklore

Eddie knows he doesn’t have much going for him in terms of mating material.

Despite presenting as an Alpha early at age twelve, something that should have given him some kind of status in a town like Hawkins, there’s always been something about him that makes people turn their noses up at him, close doors in his face. He’s kind of wishy-washy when it comes to the things he’s not passionate about, he smells like wet pavement and cigarette smoke, and can’t for the life of him seem to graduate high school.

He also can’t grow a beard, can’t remember to separate the darks from the lights, can’t tie his shoes without using the bunny ears method, can’t hop in place and rub his tummy, can’t- 

Well the point is, there are a lot of “can’t”s in his life and never a whole lot of “can”s

The one thing Eddie can do without a shadow of a doubt is pursue delusions of grandeur with a single-minded determination. No matter how hard this shit-hole town and all its designation-obsessed inhabitants have tried to beat him into the dirt over the years, he’s never let go of his dreams. Some day, he’s going to play songs for the entire goddamn planet, making millions of dollars off lyrics inspired by all the games and books that have gotten his head shoved in the Hawkin’s High toilets over the years, and Mayor Kline will have to give him a key to the city while Eddie Munson, town freak, gives him the middle finger.

And, if all the stars align and the Big Guy upstairs he doesn’t believe in does him several solids, he’ll be doing it with Steve Harrington standing by his side.

The guys think he’s crazy—Eddie thinks he’s crazy—but Eddie is determined to give his all into courting Steve Harrington before their shared senior year ends. He’s, by and large, the most eligible Omega in all of Hawkins, even with his recent breakup with Nancy Wheeler under his belt. No amount of ditching the popular crowd, adopting a bunch of children, and becoming best friends with band geek Robin Buckley has been enough to deter the Alphas of Hawkins High, even if some of them won’t admit it.

Eddie takes great pleasure in watching every failed courting offer. Steve has always been picky about who he lets take him out, but he hasn’t taken up a single Alpha’s offer since Nancy and the rejections are getting more brutal by the day. Eddie suspects it’s Robin’s influence and if that is the case he needs to thank her profusely because Eddie goes a little weak in the knees every time he sees Steve literally turn up his perfect nose at an offer.

So, the odds aren’t looking good. Steve is picky and Eddie is famously a poor, nobody freak, not the kind of guy with the resources to properly woo a guy like Steve, but what Eddie does have is a lot of passion and a strong desire to prove himself. 

So Eddie has a capital P Plan.

“Hey Buckley,” Eddie says sliding up to the girl where she’s packing up at the bleachers after practice. She gives him a scrutinizing look and clearly finds him lacking, squinting her eyes at him like he’s a little bug landed on her shoulder. Irritating and suspicious. Which, rude. “I was wondering if a fine lady like yourself would happen to know what one Steve Harrington might be hoping for in a courting” Robin clearly wasn’t expecting him to come right out and ask, her blue eyes going wide.

“What the fuck, Munson!” She crows, clearly embarrassed by his lack of tact.

“What!?” He fires back, not understanding what the big deal is. He wants to court Steve and Robin is the best source of information on how to go about it.

“You can’t just ask that, you doofus,” she hisses, lavender scent going smokey like brush fire.

“Why not? I want to court him, like, publicly. Everyone’s gonna know in a couple weeks anyway. Shouldn’t you be glad you’re the first to know?” He huffs. He knows it’s not exactly the done thing to go around telling people you’re going to court someone. You’re supposed to be delicate. Hint at it and build up little courting gifts and don’t look anyone in the eye. It’s dumb as hell and Eddie wants no part of it. Besides, so far as Eddie has seen, that method hasn’t worked on Steve anyway. Eddie may as well go about this in his own way, which includes getting insider information.

Still clearly not impressed, Robin says “You? You want to court Steve? Resident anti-conformist, jock-hating, Eddie Munson wants to court Steve Harrington. Why?” Her tone is clearly disbelieving, which, again, rude.

“Uh, I mean, have you seen him with those kids? He’s wicked hot with that whole mom thing he’s got going on.” At that, Robin gags. “And, I mean, I know he’s a jock but he’s also an Omega and he pretty much said fuck it to Hawkin’s High when he presented and refused to give up his position as captain. That was super fucking metal,” he says all earnest.

“And I like the way he smells, like a fresh cinnamon roll. And we shared an English class once and he asked me about the doodle of a Beholder I worked on instead of taking notes. And I know I’m not exactly a prime Alpha but I don’t think that really matters. At least not to me. I want to kiss him and make sweet love to him and have babies with him and -” Robin cuts him off with a hand over his mouth.

“Ok, I get it. You like him.” She says that, but she’s still looking at him like she can’t figure him out. “Alright…I don’t know if I like you Eddie but I’ll throw you a bone. Just one, got it? And if you fuck it up, I’m not helping you again.” She says, waiting for him to nod before removing her hand from his mouth.

Eddie takes a deep, overdramatic breath in like he’s just breached water. “Got it.”

Robin takes a deep breath of her own. “Steve’s been propositioned for courting 19 times since he presented and he’s only said yes to one. One-off dates not included.” She hasn’t stopped looking him straight in the eye, making sure he pays attention. “Nancy gave him a set of handwritten notes for history because she noticed he was struggling. All the other Alphas got him fancy jewelry, useless house stuff, and generic valentine's day crap.” With that, she gives him one last, long look before grabbing her trumpet and leaving, the sound of metal clanging under her feet following in her wake.

“Thanks, Buckey!” He calls out, waving his hand wildly at her retreating back. She ignores him.

Well, no matter. He’s got a courting to plan.

The thing about courting when you have $3.45 to your name after rent and gas is that you have to get creative. Which isn’t a problem, Eddie breathes creativity. If he wasn't already “The Freak” he’s sure he would be Eddie “The Creative” Munson. Really, it has a nice ring to it.

The problem comes with making something with $3.45 that is also a worthy courting gift for Steve Harrington. Which, given Robin’s tip, might not be as big a concern as he would have thought. But even if Steve would be happy with a heartfelt love letter and those peanut butter brownies Eddie knows he likes, there’s a part of him that wants to blow every other Alpha and Beta that came before him completely out of the water. Maybe especially Nancy Wheeler.

Sue him, he wants to be the best.

Which leaves him with the option of a gesture. Eddie loves a gesture, but this one is going to require some help. Luckily, Eddie knows where every gang of geeks in Hawkin’s makes their dens, even if they’re not his gang of geeks. It comes with being Head Freak. It’s his responsibility, really.

Which is how he finds himself in the Hawkins Middle AV club room being stared down by a bunch of beady-eyed thirteen year olds on the verge of presenting. Jesus, these kids are intense.

“So yeah, that’s what I’m planning,” he finishes explaining. Would it kill them to look a little impressed? He’s pretty proud of it himself. Instead of sharing looks of awe, the six of them share looks of judgement between them, obviously having a silent conversation between them like some kind of hive mind. Eddie will never admit it makes him sweat a little bit.

“You want to ask to court Steve. Steve Harrington?” the tall, skinny one asks like he can’t believe it. Eddie doesn’t know if the disgust is for him or for the Omega. Either way, ouch.

“Yes,” he replies, sweating a little more. They all share more looks, the redhead in particular is looking at him like he’s gum stuck on the bottom of her shoes. 

“Why?” The curly one asks, firm and more seriously than any kid that dorky looking should have any right to speak. Seriously, he looks like a poodle in a Star Wars shirt and a trucker hat. But, Eddie knows enough about Steve to know that these are his kids, his pups, and despite how much it chafes him to have people continually asking why he wants to court Steve, like it isn’t obvious, he knows these pups are just looking out for their pack Omega.

With a deep sigh, Eddie explains for the second time in less than a week, everything he loves about Steve Harrington. At the end of his speech, the pups stare at him for a long moment before simultaneously turning their back on him to form an honest to God huddle. Seriously, the hive mind thing is looking more and more likely. Maybe he should use this for a campaign. Very Children of the Corn.

While Eddie is lost in his musing, they seem to come to some kind of conclusion, breaking up and returning to one solid, unbreakable line. It’s the other girl, hair short and at that awkward growing out length that Eddie knows all too well that steps forward. All these kids are intense, but there’s something especially severe about her, something Eddie only half recognizes.

“We will help you,” she says, quiet and solemn. 

This is going to fucking fantastic, Eddie thinks, wild grin splitting across his face.

It’s embarrassingly easy to sneak a band of six middle schoolers and one elementary schooler into the school after hours. The kids met him outside the building just at exactly 4:00 PM the Friday after their meeting in the AV room just as they planned. The addition of the feisty ten year old was unexpected, but she proved herself invaluable in charming the one teacher that stopped them on their way to the radio room, spinning some tale about being so excited for higher learning that they wanted to explore the high school. Eddie thinks Erica Sinclair should run the world.

The kids are a well oiled, if slightly annoying, machine. As soon as Eddie pops the door open they’re getting to work figuring out how the PA system works and how long the range is. Dustin and Lucas insist that they move the entire unit closer to the field, and Max and Will are quick to source a cart for the whole thing. In record time they’re all piling into the coaches office, the one with a clear view of the basketball court where the team is running their Friday drills. Honestly, it feels a little like they’re highjacking Eddie’s plan, but the smiles on their face and their puppy sweet excitement softens the blow a little.

“You ready?” The curly haired one, Dustin, asks while offering him the mic.

“I was born for this, Dusty,” he says, snatching the mic out of his hand and taking his place outside the main gym doors.

Despite what he said, Eddie is nervous. He shakes his hands and bounces in place, trying to shake it off. Before he’s ready, he hears the slightly crackly jazzy intro pouring through the speakers. He counts his beats, waiting for his que. He spent hours planning this, recording the background music with the band, turning the lyrics over and over in his head, even practicing his grand entrance. He’s as ready as he can be.

God, he hopes this works.

And there’s his que, that little pause in the music just enough time for him to push open the doors to the main gym with all his strength, relishing in the dramatic banging sound.

All eyes are on him. Steve’s eyes are on him.

You're just too good to be true,

Can't take my eyes off of you,

He sings as he walks. All the activity in the gym has come to a halt, everyone too confused and curious to stop it. He’s looking right at Steve, who turns his head like he’s expecting to see someone else behind him. He’s so cute, Eddie wants to eat him alive.

At long last love has arrived,

And I thank God I'm alive,

You're just too good to be true

Eddie knows he doesn’t have a lot of time, any moment now principle Higgins and his one security lackey are going to bust through the doors to find out who stole the announcement equipment. This is the moment, the one that needs to count. Eddie saunters right up to Steve like his heart isn’t trying to beat out of his chest and kneels down like a knight to their king. He takes his hand, and Steve lets him as he sings the next line looking right up into those beautiful hazel eyes.

Can't take my eyes off of you.

He turns the hand in his own over to expose the Omega’s wrist just as the music pauses and presses a soft, lingering kiss to the gland there. A courting kiss.

Almost like he planned it, the doors burst open a second time revealing the fuming face of Principle Higgins and his goon. He turns a manic grin Steve’s way just as the music picks back up, cutting straight to the chorus. He presses one last kiss to Steve’s wrist and takes in the way his pretty, pink lips are parted in disbelief, eyes wide and then he’s running.

I love you baby,

And if it's quite alright,

I need you baby,

To warm the lonely nights

Let it never be said that Eddie Munson, for all the ways he fails to be the ideal Alpha, doesn’t have a hell of a lot of stamina. He’s been a proud runner all his life, and he’s using it to his advantage today to put on a show. He’s singing and he’s running as Higgins and Officer Jerry chase his tail like they have any hope of catching him when he doesn’t want to be caught, when he can see the most beautiful boy in the world laughing at him in disbelief as he ducks and dodges around the court.

But even Eddie has his limits and, like he said, he planned this to a T. He can feel himself running out of breath but he refuses to call it before the climax. He’s stomping his way up the bleachers, making a show of going between the rows dancing like he’s in an old hollywood musical. Higgin’s is closing in, but there’s now way he’s getting caught. Not today. He puts in a burst of speed, leaving them in the dust and putting himself right at the top of the wooden stands, singing directly to Steve who is absolutely glowing on the court.

And let me love you,

Baby let me love you…

The music gives one last swell, the Corroded Coffin of two days ago pouring their heart out for the Eddie of today. The music comes to an abrupt halt, the gym very quickly filling with laughter and applause. The kids are screaming their heads off in the office, loud enough to draw Steve’s attention to where they can be seen through the large window. The joy and disbelief on Steve’s face makes all of this worth it, no matter what happens next.

Eddie wishes he could relish in it longer, but the goon squad is gaining ground fast and he has one last message to give before he hauls ass into the next phase of his plan. He starts inching his way toward the exit, not taking his eyes off Steve as he goes. He needs him to hear this.

“Steve Harrington, it would be the honor of my life to court you with the intention of mating. Meet me at the lake at seven if you’ll hear me out.” And with that, he’s gone. He wishes he could stay to see his reaction, but he’s out of time.

He pushes through the emergency exit to the sound of hollering and clapping, all he can do now is commence with phase two.

Phase two mainly consists of picking everything up from the trailer, changing into his nice clothes, and heading toward Lover’s Lake to set everything up.

Eddie thinks this is the most nerve wracking part of the whole plan. In many ways, the whole big performance was the easy part. Eddie loves to perform, eats up the attention like a cat laps up milk. This, the full bearing of his heart to the Omega he wants to spend his life with, is far scarier than anything else. Here in the back of his van, the paper hearts and pillar candles, hand-picked daisies and hand-made peanut butter brownies, leave him completely exposed.

He wonders if Steve will show up.

He wishes he didn’t set up so god damn early. The waiting is excruciating.

The Alpha paces around, adjusts the blankets on the bottom of the van and then decides they were better before, and checks his watch every half minute like it will make time move faster. He sits and watches the hands turn from 6:59 to 7:00. Maybe Steve won’t come. Maybe this was all for nothing and he’ll have to go back to school on Monday and pretend like he isn’t heartbroken.

His watch continues to tick. 7:03, 7:07, 7:10. He’s getting ready to pick it all back up when he hears the muffled sound of tires on soft dirt. Suddenly, his heart is in his throat as he watches the distinct headlights of his favorite Beamer turn into the clearing.

Eddie scrambles to his feet, he has a plan to carry out.

He watches, heart in his throat as Steve parks. Watches as the door opens and Steve emerges, a sweet, sheepish smile on his face.

“Sorry I’m late.” Steve looks like a dream. He clearly went home and had a shower and a change of clothes. He’s wearing light wash jeans that hug his thighs and a soft looking, deep red sweater, the collar of a white dress shirt peeking out from underneath. He’s dressed up for Eddie.

There’s a long pause where Eddie forgets how to speak and Steve just stands there, clearly waiting for Eddie to make a move. Eddie comes back to himself all at one, shaking his head hard like a dog, making Steve let out a startled laugh. “What the hell?” He asks, not mean, but bemused. 

“My deepest apologies my liege, I was simply stunned by your beauty,” he says with a half bow, extending his arm for Steve to take. “It is my pleasure to welcome you to Cafe Munson, the finest pop up restaurant this side of Indiana.” It’s goofy and a little ridiculous but Steve takes the offered arm with a little smile, sending a pleasant jolt through his body. 

Eddie leads Steve toward the open back of the van, watching him intently as he takes it in. He gets to see as the Omega’s eyes go wide, mouth parting in a little gasp. When he turns to look at Eddie, he’s already looking back. “You did this for me?” He asks, wonder coloring his voice. All of a sudden Eddie feels a little shy, a little sheepish.

“I know it’s not much, I’m not exactly liquid at the moment, but I wanted to do something nice for you,” he says, unoccupied arm reaching up to tug a piece of hair over his mouth. Steve looks at him for a long moment before turning back to the van. There are blankets everywhere, pretty much every one from the house plus a couple he nicked from Gareth’s house after practice. The emergency pillar lights from the pantry give the space a soft glow, paper hearts hang from string from the metal roof, and a repurposed laundry basket full of tupperwares and miller lites sits in the center.

“It’s perfect” Steve says, and Eddie can’t help but believe him. Not when his scent is blooming, cinnamon roll sweet, right under Eddie’s nose.

Eddie leads him to the van, gives him his hand to help him into the back. He takes a moment to take it all in, Steve Harrington settling into a date with Eddie Munson. It’s his biggest dream come true. 

He climbs in after the other boy and starts pulling out tupperwares. Steve has settled in to lean on the wall of pillows Eddie constructed for just this reason, pulling a blanket over the both of them when Eddie settles in next to him. Steve laughs with every overly dramatic introduction he makes for the food, and Eddie doesn’t think he’s ever been this warm. Neither of them brings up why they’re here, the underlying meaning behind it all. They dance around it, laughing about the kids, Steve’s sports and Eddie’s games, the look on Principle Higgin’s face when he burst into the gym earlier that day. The whole place smells like cinnamon and smoke, Eddie doesn’t think there’s a better smell in the whole world.

They don’t say a thing about courting or mating or scents until they polish off their cold pasta, courtesy of Wayne, and Eddie pulls out the last tupperware from the bottom of the laundry basket. “And for dessert, may I have a drumroll please….” Steve rolls his eyes but smiles as he complies, drumming a little beat with fingers on the side of the van. Eddie pulls out the container with a flourish, “The finest peanut butter brownies $3.15 worth of ingredients from Melvald’s can get you.” He expects laughter, maybe some light teasing as Steve has been shown to enjoy throughout the night, but all he gets is silence. 

He worries, for a moment, that he got it wrong. Maybe Steve doesn’t like peanut butter brownies. Jesus H Christ, maybe he’s allergic to peanuts and Eddie has just massively fucked this up. He’s getting ready to spiral and try to fix it when Steve speaks, voice soft in a way Eddie can’t place.

“Those are my favorites,” he says. When Eddie is brave enough to look at his face again, he’s met with wet, adoring eyes. Eddie doesn't know if anyone has ever looked at him like that before. Like he was something magical. Something special just for them.

Eddie clears his throat when Steve doesn’t say anything else. Just keeps staring at him like he’s waiting for something big. “Yeah, yeah I know,” he says, bracing himself for what comes next. “I uh, I saw you buy some at the club fair last year. You bought three of them and then came back for one more before they closed the booth.” It shouldn’t be such a big admission, but it feels like he’s just handed Steve his heart on a silver platter.

“Eddie?” Steve asks, turning toward him fully.

“Yeah?” Eddie asks, sitting up so they’re eye to eye.

“What you said, on the basketball court, will you ask me again?” He’s looking at him with so much hope in his eyes, Eddie almost feels like he could choke on it. Instead, he focuses in on the perfect scent of the man next to him, breathes steadily in and out.

“It would be the honor of my life to court you with the intention of mating, Steve Harrington.” As he says it, he reaches into his pocket for his last offering, his hail mary pass, his death saving throw. It’s a silly thing, cost his last 30 cents at the stationary store, but he was listening to Robin on those bleachers that day. Knows that the gesture and the picnic are all well and good, but what Steve has been missing with all those other Alphas is someone who notices the small details and holds them close. Someone who cares about his C+ in History, someone who knows his favorite brownies are swirled with peanut butter.

Someone who notices that he lost his eraser last week and has been meaning to pick up a new one.

Eddie holds out his heart one last time, it’s shaped like a 30 cent eraser. White and covered with a paper band. The best one on the market.

Steve stares at the little eraser like it contains the answers to the universe, and then he’s plucking it, oh so gently, out of his hands and cradling it in his own. Eddie waits, the ball is completely in Steve’s court now, Eddie has played all his cards.

Suddenly, Steve scent starts to bloom, even more than it did when he first saw the van. The smell of sugar, cinnamon, and yeast so strong it makes Eddie feel light headed. Eddie gets a glimpse of the most beautiful smile in the world just before Steve is throwing his arm around his neck, nudging his way into his lap to notch his head right at Eddie’s scent gland. Eddie’s arms instinctually wrap around his back, keeping him close.

“Yes,” Steve says, the sound of it muffled by the soft skin of Eddie’s neck. Eddie squeezes him tight, knows he needs to ask, just to make sure but worried he’s hallucinating. Scared to believe he’s getting everything he’s ever wanted.

“Yes?” He asks, lips trembling where they’ve found their own place at Steve’s neck, wanting to be as close as possible, just in case.

“Yes.” And Steve is pulling back, which Eddie hates, and cupping his face in is hands. “It would be the honor of my life to accept your courting offer, Eddie Munson,” he says, sure and steady and full to the brim of hope.

“Holy shit.” Eddie can’t believe this is happening. Despite all the planing and the performing and the putting his heart on the line he never actually let himself think that this would happen. Never let himself think about how it would end.

Without much though Eddie barrels forward to bury his head back into the Omega’s neck, his Omega’s neck, peppering him with fervent little kisses until Steve is giggling so hard he tips them over into the pile of pillows behind him. Eddie is full to the brim with joy, happier than he’s ever been and all of a sudden he needs to move. Needs to let the whole world know what he’s got in the palm of his hands.

He jolts up with one last kiss to Steve’s cheek, managing a quick “be right back!” before he launching himself out of the van. He hears Steve calling out in confusion, but it quickly turns into more joyous laughter as Eddie steps out of the van and starts jumping in place, punching the air and whooping into the night sky.

“Fuck you Hawkins! I’m courting Steve Harrington! I’m on top of the God Damn world!” He gets in one last double bird in the general direction of Main Street before Steve is calling him back in.

“Ok, you’ve had your moment. Now get your ass back in here and kiss me for real, you dumb Alpha,” he says, laughter still caught in his throat. And really? Who is Eddie do deny a request like that?

So excited for MMM, guys! I won't be doing every day, but I will be doing at lest a couple of full one shots and some of my normal ramblings. (Also, this is the longest thing I've ever written that wasn't an academic paper and I am low key very proud of myself)

[tessasturns]

TEXTS + BLURB WITH BSF!CHRIS PT. 5

warnings…. swearing, angst, love confession

blessings and riches, tessa

(pt.1) (pt.2) (pt.3) (pt.4) (masterlist) (taglist)

you open the door to see the brunette boy standing in front of you, he looked like he hasn’t slept in days.

“hey come in” you say, opening the door wider to let chris in. he does just that, taking a seat on the couch.

you close the door and join him on the couch. the room is quiet, neither of you knowing how to start the conversation.

you had a crush on chris, but it was at the beginning of your friendship. you knew it wasn’t going anywhere at the time, but do you want this to go anywhere?

“so… how’ve you been?” you break the silence with a shaky voice. “don’t start that shit” he snaps.

you just hold your tongue, not knowing why he’s been so off. “i really like you, y/n. i do. more than a friend. i meant it in my text.” chris’ tongue betrays him, the words spilling out.

“uh- chris”

“you don’t need to say anything. i just wanted you to know that.” he states. the both of you stare at the tv ahead, gravity falls on pause.

“chris i like you too, but i’m not sure if i’m ready for a relationship yet” you sigh.

“but i trust you chris. even though i may not be ready, i trust you enough to know you won’t hurt me. we don’t have to start anything right away, but i do want to take things slow with you.” you look up at the boy who is already looking down at you.

“i promise you that i will never let you go and i will never let anything get in the way of us. i love you.” chris replies in a soft voice

“thank you for understanding chris”

“so, we can just start slow?”

“i’d like that.”

the rest of the night was just watching movies and slowly cuddling closer to each other. the two of you decide to call it a night, and go to your room.

it wasn’t uncommon for you and chris to have sleepovers, so you did just that. the two of you laid closer than usual as the silence crept in.

chris looked down at you while you slept, curled into the blanket you used to make blanket forts with.

he couldn’t believe it. he couldn’t believe that the girl he once would share juice boxes with would be his girlfriend.

he couldn’t believe it.

was he moving to fast? what if the ‘relationship’ doesn’t work out and he throws away years of friendship?

the panic had flooded his mind. what if they were better off as friends? yes, they flirt like a couple, but what if they’re not meant to be together? what if y/n didn’t really want to, she just felt forced?

chris wanted a relationship with you, of course he did. but what if.

he knew it was wrong, he knew it was rude but he slowly crept up from where he was previously laying then grabbed his phone and his keys.

he opened the door with a quiet precision, careful not to wake you up. he left through the back door and practically sprinted to his car.

his mind was racing a thousand kilometres a minute. why was he doing this? he wanted this relationship so bad? why is he running away?

once he enters the car, the rest of the night is a blur. speeding down streets, slamming on the brakes every now and then, wondering why he left her in the first place.

the sun intruded the room through the curtains as you groan and wake up. you look to your left, expecting to see the brunette boy who once laid there, but didn’t.

what the fuck? where did he go? maybe he’s just in the kitchen?

you put on your slippers and walk to the kitchen, not seeing chris anywhere.

you reach for your phone and try to see his location, only to find that he stopped sharing it with you.

great.

you text him at lightning speed, wondering what you did.

chris was probably on do not disturb, as always. you decide to text his brother matt, hoping he knew chris’ whereabouts.

then, the anxiety settles in. were you too clingy? what if he wanted a relationship and he didn’t want to ‘start slow’?

you throw your phone onto the couch in the living room, flopping down right next to it.

you try to hold back the tears, but they spill out of your eyes. you knew crying over a boy wasn’t going to do anything, but let the emotions wash over you nonetheless.

tessa’s notes… sorry abt the cliffhanger, part five will be out soon !!

taglist… @emely9274 @baileysturnz @sllutty-sturniolo @chrisspussygang @ivysturnss @evansturn @sturniolosluttt @kisschriss @sheluvsthesturniolos @glitterybtch @mothstvrnz @joanakaulitz @csturnioloswifey @bee-43 @leprechaunbirthdaygirl

comment to be added or removed.

© tessasturns

[lambmotifz]

“embrace switching!!” what if i don’t want to. bottom!dean feels ooc (to me) no matter how hard the enjoyers of this dynamic try to prove otherwise

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

Is gojo truly selfless? Most people think he does it for an ulterior motive and for his personal beneficial reasons & it’s kinda calculated. Like he can gain benefit out of it exp: saving yuuji from execution and saving megumi from his clan, to make his vision/dream of transforming the jujutsu society come true. So it’s kinda selfish more or less?

see . the thing about gojo is that he’s constantly walking on the fine line between ’extremely selfless’ and ’extremely selfish.’ the reason i often call him selfless is specifically in regards to how i see him acting when he’s in love — i think that if gojo loves you, what’s most comfortable for him is to distance himself from you and watch you be happy with someone else. even if it it irks at him. he would do it because he believes it’s best for the both of you.

but you could also make an argument that it’s very selfish because he’s ignoring what he feels for you and what you feel for him, making a decision that’s less paralyzing for him but making it for the both of you — etc. that’s kinda why it’s difficult. at some point selflessness and martyrdom spins back to selfishness; but either way i think gojo exists right at the gap between them. he's an extreme case.

relationship aside though, i’d call canon gojo selfless for very similar reasons — because his entire goal centers around the idea of everyone leaving him behind. i agree that gojo is calculative, and that both saving megumi and yuuji was apart of his dream to nurture powerful allies, but i also think you’re ignoring an extremely important part of gojo’s character by implying that’s all it was. gojo’s main character motivation is the preservation of youth — and another point that’s important to him is personal autonomy. he wants kids to be kids, and he wants people to get to choose how they live their lives. both of these motivations are more important to him than his selfless/selfish dream of being surpassed.

so, basically — i think gojo is very logical and calculative at his core, and he doesn’t do what he does out of the kindness of his heart — he does it because it’s important to him. protecting youth is important to him. being a mentor is important to him. he does what he does for himself which could be called selfish, but he also deliberately does things that bring him more pain, and more isolation, which could be called selfless. so it’s tough. overall i think it’s wrong to treat gojo like a saint but also wrong to treat him like some mastermind — gojo does what he wants, and he mostly wants things that are good.

[starspilli]

seen a lot of people talking about fanon stuff specifically irt dc recently and i have to say i think it really comes down to a lot of people just… not caring about comics as a medium. which sucks imo! comics are such a unique and special format for storytelling and i really just think a lot of these stories or characters don’t hit the same when you divorce them from that context. which is where i think a lot of the stuff i’ve seen people talk about comes from… like sure you can look at panels posted online or read through a character’s wikipedia article and know all of the technical canon about them but i think that by not reading the comics you’re robbing yourself of smth very special... i really love when you can tell people who talk about these things have a real love for & knowledge of the medium and its history

[not-a-biscuit]

Hi, I’m trying to put together a compendium of information and tips from disabled people on how the world can be made more accessible to you. This includes any and all disabilities, whether they be physical or mental. If you consider yourself to be disabled, your input is appreciated.

If you’re not disabled, but would like to help get more information, it would be highly appreciated if you could re-blog, and if you wanted to tag some disabled friends that would be great, too. Even better actually!

(under the cut: further elaboration on what this would include, some sample questions, and the questionnaire and info sheet)

I’ve seen lots of posts from disabled people on small things that would be helpful for them (for example: not putting lots of emojis for people who use screen readers) and would just like to compile all of it in one easy to share document.

I would also love for it to include a resources section for learning more about different disabilities. Things like books, movies, videos, and other posts that do a good job of explaining things to people.

some questions that would really help if they were answered are:

What are some ways that general people on the internet could make your life easier?

What are some ways that the general population could make your in person life easier?

What are some ways people you know personally could make your life easier?

What are some things you really dislike people doing regarding your disability?

What media do you think does a good job representing your disability?

Do you have a social media account concerning your disability that you’d like for me to include in my section of further resources?

Do you have any positivity you would like to share about your disability?

answer as many or as few of these as you’d like, and this is of course non-comprehensive, so feel free to include any other information that you’d like to.

If you think you’ll answer all or most of these, I’d appreciate you filling out the survey linked at the bottom. It will have two sections. The first asks for information on your disability (for organization purposes in the accommodation sheet), and the second asks for actual accommodations.

If you only wish to answer one or two (or have questions/comments/concerns), you can answer in the comments, reblogs, or my dms.

Within he information spreadsheet itself, some disabilities will have entire sections, others will be categorized into sections depending on what makes the most sense. This has nothing to do with perceived importance/severity of the disability, merely with whether the information is generalizable to other disabilities in a category :)

It is also currently in the workshop stage, so if you have any tips on ways to make using the spreadsheet a more enjoyable experience, I'd love that too!

Questionnaire

Accommodation Anthology

(sorry if this reads like a corporate survey btw. I really just wanted to include as much info as I could)

[soullessjack]

"tell me on anon what you wouldn’t off anon"

i think dean was straight up abusive towards jack and while there is room for redemption to be explored, in canon, the show did not give him any sort of redemption. in other words in my eyes "canon" dean winchester is an abuser (but canon is unimportant anyways so whatever)

im scared of saying this and getting stoned to death

no need to comment you can just post this without saying anything if you want

- 🏴‍☠️

no no you’re right and you should say it, however I disagree that Dean was completely abusive and that there was never any canon redemption.

firstly I think there’s a slight difference in someone being abusive vs being an abuser;

abuse (or abusive behavior/tendencies) can happen accidentally, unintentionally, especially if it’s resulted from trauma (like Dean’s). you can be completely unaware that something you’ve done or said is abusive, especially because being abusive can be as simple as yelling or hitting someone, or treating them unfairly (like jack). people who have abusive tendencies or behaviors are capable of regretting it and wanting/trying to change…whereas an abuser is wholly aware, intentional and remorseless about their actions. they know what they are doing, they know it’s immoral/inhumane and they just don’t care—either because they feel entitled or justified in some way, or even if they don’t.

Dean has repeatedly shown plenty of regret, guilt and blatant self hatred for his abusive tendencies and how they affect the people around him. It’s one of the most important parts of his character, being the crux of his self worth and why he can’t accept that people (Cas) genuinely care about him or consider him a good person. When he refers to himself as “daddy’s blunt instrument” or “poison,” it isn’t just about being a hunter whose life constantly risks other peoples inescapably, it’s also about the violent nature that’s instilled into Dean constantly by John and how both of those things either isolates him from getting close to anyone else, or drives away people who do get close. That’s why there’s no light at the end of the tunnel for Dean, why he’s so resigned to dying bloody. It’s all he thinks he can ever have or really deserve.

When Jack is dying in 14x07, Dean physically cannot stand to see it. He’s angry that Jack is dying so young and so out of nowhere; he thinks it’s unfair and wrong, point blank. But above all else, (as Sam says) Dean canonically has never forgotten or forgiven himself for how he had treated Jack, even though by this point in time they’ve already had a good relationship for the past two years. He’s angry and upset that Jack is dying, but he’s also upset because he still thinks, after all this time, that he’s never been able to fully make up for what he did, and now he’s lost any chance to with Jack’s limited time. That’s why Dean decides to take him on the road trip; that’s why he says “Who would’ve thought being around me (the person who treated you terribly at one point) would make you (the person who didn’t deserve it) sentimental?”

When Dean leaves Jack’s room for the last time and wounds up being absent for his death, he’s even more upset about it, and later brings it up to take a dig at Sam for thinking he didn’t do enough for Jack because, by Dean’s own admission, Sam had always been the one to do more. “At least you were there for him [because I wasn’t, and I see that as another failure on top of everything else I did to him before].” And then, after the three of them get hammered in Jack’s memory, Dean turns to Cas and asks, “we did everything we could, right?” There’s a lot more in 14x07 but I’ll leave it alone for now, and move onto the redemption part of what you said.

I know I said I disagreed, but really it’s only partially; instead I believe that the show simply didn’t give enough time for a complete redemption (save me spn revival wish fulfillments, spn revival wish fulfillments save me). The end of S14 is basically the destruction of the Team Free Will 2.0 found family unit, not just between Dean and Cas, but also between Dean and Sam, and Jack and the three of them. And I think the reason there’s so much more emphasis on Dean’s relationship with Jack (+ why the family unit falling apart is specifically centered on it) is specifically because of how they started; Dean was initially the only one to be distrustful of Jack and mistreat him as a result, whereas Sam and Cas were willing to see Jack with more humanity and goodness, and when Jack proved that he was good that was the crux of Dean’s guilt going forward; his distrust was wrong and misguided, and the abuse he put Jack through because of it was even more wrong and undeserved.

But then after Mary’s death, the three of them have no idea what to think. They’re more reluctant than Bobby is to admit that Jack could have simply had his evil bone activated after losing his soul/eating Michael’s grace, but they aren’t excluding the idea either. The question up in the air now is: “Was Dean right all along? Were we wrong for trusting Jack and thinking he was good? Is all of this our fault?” (and going back to 14x07, the basic ‘framework’ of Dean’s dynamic with Jack is basically ‘I was wrong about you being evil and now that I love you I want to be keep being wrong about you being evil’ and ‘I want you to be wrong about me being evil too, especially now that you love me and I love you’).

Sam, Dean, Cas and Jack are all presented with the worst case scenario that had always been hanging over Jack’s entire existence. None of them want to believe it after growing so close to him (and vice versa), but they’re not given much else to consider. Mary’s death was one thing, one horrible tragic wound reopening, but they knew it was an accident and they knew Jack had tried to fix it. It isn’t until Duma got her claws into Jack and ordered him to kill nonbelievers that TFW finally decides they have to do something final about Jack, and Dean resumes his militant Kill All Monsters behavior. He’s dissociating into the blunt instrument mindset to protect himself from the grief of losing his mother and potentially losing his son. He can’t even bear to consider Jack his son anymore, both because of Mary and the task of killing him, so Jack becomes “just another monster,” in his dissociative mind. His son wouldn’t have killed Mary or tortured Nick or murdered people randomly because his son was a good person, and his son does not deserve to die, but whatever identical monster has inexplicably replaced Jack would certainly do that and certainly does deserve to die.

Dean’s “poison” is rooted in the fact that his coping mechanisms are intertwined with abusive tendencies and behaviors. He pushes people away if he thinks he doesn’t deserve their respect or love, and he buries any emotional attachment to them because he knows it’s his greatest weakness. That’s why he couldn’t bring himself to shoot Jack, regardless of the grief he felt for Mary or how much he tried to see Jack as a monster that wasn’t really his son. When Jack knelt down, said “I understand. I know what I’ve done. And you were right all along. I am a monster,” and then waited for the gun to go off, that’s what snapped Dean out of it. That’s what got him to see that this was still his son—that and the road trip from 14x07 flashing before his eyes. The grief he feels for Mary’s death is still painful and will be for a long time, but he won’t let it cloud him from seeing that his son is still there and still a good person who deserves the chance to make it right and be forgiven.

That militant dissociation comes back again following Jack’s death and Chuck’s retaliation/reveal that they’ve been nothing but a bunch of lowbrow Truman Burbanks to an unfeeling deity their entire lives. The most recent Destivorce is because Dean has constantly been pushing Cas away and severing their ties to cope with the situation. It’s bad throughout all of S15, but it’s especially worse towards the end when Dean is rampant on Jack’s suicide bomb plan happening for a chance at freedom. I’ve seen a LOT of people say that Dean’s love is conditional because of this, but it really…isn’t.

If Dean never cared about Jack, he’d never take time out of his life to spend some final moments with him, or share a specific father/son memory with him to indirectly communicate that he does see Jack as a son, but ultimately doesn’t feel like he deserves to be a father. If he truly felt that Jack “wasn’t family,” he wouldn’t have shown any of the concern for Jack that he did after Jack detonated in the Empty (frantically demanding to know if he’s alive and to bring him back); he wouldn’t have tried to apologize to Jack for hearing it, and he wouldn’t have *checks transcript* reacted in mild horror at Jack agreeing with what he said (and personally, if I’m insulting someone, I would want them to feel the same way that I feel).

Additionally, If Dean’s love is conditional, particularly on the basis of how useful someone is to him, then he wouldn’t have been expecting Jack to come back home with them or considering buying him actual gifts (a flat screen TV and a recliner, specifically for his room in the Bunker I might add) for saving the world.

Out of all the problems S15 had, I think the pacing was the absolute worst. Too many plots and one-off characters and plot devices squeezed into a short amount of episodes; too much focus put into filler instead of plot progression, etc etc. But what it absolutely missed out on was granting any of the characters any proper closure. I think that’s why Dean’s conflict with Jack feels so unresolved and unredeemed. Dean gets mean -> Dean feels bad -> Dean gets nice again, but that’s about it. For now I tend to view his dynamic with Jack as them being two sides of the same coin: Dean feels like he doesn’t deserve to be a father figure to Jack after everything he did, and Jack feels like he doesn’t deserve to be a part of their family as a son after everything he did.

[rattusrattus3]

can i ask what type of camera you use to film your videos or if you have one you'd recommend? i want to start doing little video diaries and making videos about my various diy projects but i have no idea where to start and i use my phone for a lot of different things while diying which makes it sort of impractical to record with

(i absolutely love your videos by the way you are such a huge inspiration for me and i love putting your videos on when im working on my own projects)

Thanks so much! Tbh I’m NOT at all a Tech Person, my boyfriend is, and if it wasn’t for him I’d probably still be recording on my phone - my camera is AWESOME and I love it, but as it was a gift from previously mentioned boyfriend, I don’t really have any research on other brands/reccomendations otherwise ;-;

Anyway, mine is a Sony ZV-1 , if you can find a video camera second hand that would be my reccomendation, cause new ones are Extremly expensive

It took me like …. 2 years ? Maybe ? Before I finally got a camera instead of just filming on my phone, and it made life SO MUCH EASIER, but that being said, the money I make on YouTube would have BARELY covered the camera until I was like … maybe 3 or 4 years into making content, and even then, it would have taken a lot of time / effort to save up if I was just relying on YouTube Money, so my reccomendation is, if it’s just a hobby, start by using what you have / what is cheapest / second hand / borrowed / etc , because it will likely take a while to make the money back - I hope that’s not discouraging !

Im really excited for your video projects! Best of luck and I’m sure we’d all love updates so feel free to share if you get ‘em posted 🥰

(Also, I think there’s YouTubers who have dedicated channels/videos recommending equipment to new people so that might be worth a look!)

[pommunist]

Good day tumblr mutual pommunist. Thank you for all the work you do for this community Pommunism forever!

But I'd be lying if I say I agree with some of your points.

but not address the main issue of the admins situation ? Not a word about or for them ? But instead you use your platform to talk about your role in the lore knowing these are talking

I'm not an expert on US law as I'm not from the united states but anything you may imply/say that doesn't suit your case could easily get used against you in court. Even if it's something you accidently slip up/not related it still may be.

And when you talk about serious issue in a rough situation it's easy to blurt out something that can be reread as malicious. And to add to the fact, Q is speaking in his second language.

This is not completely supporting quackity, its not hard to admit he fucked up big time

Good day to you to dear tumblr mutual 🫶

I actually had that talk with an anon the other day, about how apologies for example can be used against you if by doing so you admit to wrongdoings like idk « I’m sorry we made you sign unlawful ndas ». (can’t seem to find the post that’s what i get for being so shit at tagging 🥲)

But yeah you’re right that in the face of a potential legal issues one must be careful with the things they say and the words they use but like if you chose to go live to talk about the situation then speak on it ? Like a thank you both for the work done and for making the problems known to him, a call to his community not to harass those who talked, wouldnt bring legal harm to anyone.

Plus, and now this is just my personal (from a moral, not a legal standpoint) opinion on this kind of situations, but when someone fucks up and want to fix their wrongs, shouldn’t they take their responsibilities and take action to do the right thing even if it might cost them rather than worry about protecting themselves from the repercussions of what they’re responsible of ?

And yeah definitely agree that it’s easy to slip up and say something you might end up regretting, especially when speaking a language that isn’t your primary one, and it’s why it would probably be best for Q/Qstudios to communicate via statements that are prewritten/reviewed by a law professional rather than Twitch streams. 🫠

[needlefail]

Here’s my ranking of the final 4 episodes:

1)The Little Warrior

2)See You Tomorrow At The Creek

3)The Elders Of The Creek

4)JPs Bucket List

Granted I love all of these episodes but they serve different purposes so it’s not entirely fair to judge them for that but I am someone with specific inclinations so I rank based on what appeals to me the most.

As sad as it was to see this show go, it might be better it goes out in its prime rather than staying for so long it gets boring, cough (spongebob) cough(Loud House).

Hope someone makes fan content of it.

I wish we could’ve seen Wildernessa hang out with Stacks again, maybe she and Craig dances with JP+Maney and Kelsey+Stacks.

Honestly thats a fair rating, you’re right about the episodes serving different purposes so they cant be judged fairly

And while I do agree with you a bit on the show ending before it became overdone and such I do also sorta disagree.

I know that after a while some shows keep dragging out when its clear they have no more meaningful content to give anymore, but I really do think cotc is different from that especially when you compare it to shows like Spongebob and the Loud House (premise wise Im talking about premise wise here)

From what I can tell?? about spongebob and the loud house (cause ive never watched them), their shows with a fixed cast and a fixed environment, everything you make for the show will be created through these two elements. And idk, I feel like at some point youll run out of stuff to show

For cotc however, genuinely you could create an endless amount of interesting content. The creek is a vast location that is largely undiscovered, from the location alone youre set up for a ton of groups, characters, location and lore. And then to add to that, you can play around with things like character dynamics, development, backstories, home lives, ways of play etc etc. AND THEN TO ADD TO THAT AGAIN, The creek holds so much lore, and we’ve gotten tastes of the creek in other eras of time before but if you were to explore the creek throughout any era of the past (ex the Ancients or the Elders’ time) youve opened yet another door to multiple possibilities of interesting content

The show should have just ended on it’s own terms, we have 6 seasons and a movie and still so much of the creek is unexplored snd unknown. The crew would know when they think is best to end the show

BUT ALSO YOURE SO RIGHT I WISH WE COULD HAVE SEEN MORE WILDERNESSA AND STACKS INTERACTIONSSSSS

[zekkopunks]

Came across your drawing of the nameless person with the pink braids and the heart eyepatch- if you want name suggestions for them I'd like to offer Raine/Reine as one (pronounced as "rain")

ooo I might have to put a pin in that because that name might fit another oc idea I’ve had in my head for a while

[whoredmode]

Idk if they are but how would you fit SRTT and SRIV's DLCs into your rewrite? Like The Trouble With Clones, Genkibowl, Gangstas In Space, Enter The Dominatrix and How The Saints Saved Christmas?

like the DLCs as they are? absolutely not in my canon. i just think they’re narratively really bad (fuck those sriv ones in particular) and are so unrealistic it does not fit into my canon at all. i will give trouble with clones this much tho: i do kinda like that one but only bc i think it’s fun to play.

w that in mind there’s things like. characters still existing. jenny jaros and the director and jimmy are all still existing ppl in the universe. i always thought it’d be funny if jenny paid anteros to kill the director for her. but there’s not really elements of their actual plots that go into any part of my canon bc. like. look at them. there is no fitting All That into the ongoing drama i’ve written. in my canon there’s no cloning nonsense, the saints do not make movies, the genki gameshow is a much more scripted game, and there’s absolutely no aliens or whatever.

on the topic of christmas tho i did write out the plot of my own christmas story that takes place post-sr2. you can read it here if you’re curious.

[bookinit02]

Hi!

Completely lost here, when should the next installment of your season 5 fic be out?

hi anon! i uploaded my last chapter exactly one week ago, so nothing new will be out for a while. as i said in my notes, the earliest i can get up the episode 7 script would be next sunday, and since i am working 6 days a week now, it most likely won’t be actually finished until sunday the 25th. and then the fic chapter will drop the week after!

i’m really sorry to have lost a consistent posting schedule, but i’m genuinely trying my best to still get quality content out to you guys in a relatively quick timeframe. i don’t ever want to sacrifice the quality of my writing just for the sake of weekly uploads. i hope you can understand! as soon as i have a concrete idea of when the next script and chapter will be posted, i'll let you guys know. but no worries—it will absolutely be sometime this month!

[wriokitty]

do you dislike any of your followers/ppl who interact with u on tumblr??

Umm 😭 no?? 😭

[miraonpluto]

i am not an artist so this is probably none of my business but i am in the medical field so can i just say the way 99% of people draw gideon’s chest wound is completely anatomically incorrect

obviously we have no idea how big the fence post would have been but nearly everyone is drawing way too many ribs and ignoring the sternum. assuming it went right through her heart there should be like three ribs showing at most, and much thicker ones than i’ve seen portrayed:

there’s also the question of whether the rail went through her sternum or adjacent to it. in order for ribs to show on either side of a wound in the very center of her chest it would have had to punch right through her sternum and knock it completely out of place. it’s much more plausible that a wound to the left of the sternum would reveal jagged ribs on either side. it also just makes more sense in general since the heart is on the left side and the rail would have had an easier time impaling the cartilage on the inner ends of the ribs than the bone of the sternum.

anyway of course yknow. draw it however u want but i just wanted to provide some info on the anatomy of the whole thing :]

[bedlund]

Question about DTA- at what point do dean and cas get together in the fic? I’m under the impression it’s a slow burn but I also know it’s not complete?

hello. believe it or not you’re not the first person to ask me that and probably not the last so i’m going to link some answers here:

X

X

X

also this