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Shit Slytherins Say on Valentine's Day : #2

Hufflepuff: "Hi, did it hurt?"

Slytherin: "What?"

Hufflepuff: "When you fell from heaven."

Slytherin: "Did you just call me Satan?"

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A Slytherin and Hufflepuff dealing with their over competitive Gryffindor friend

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Absolutely perfect

I love this blog! Could you do the houses as Skyrim gifs? :D

Gryffindor:

Hufflepuff:

Ravenclaw:

Slytherin:

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Slytherins of Adventure Time

Gunter:

Probably the most evil character in AT but is kept in check by our favorite AT Hufflepuff, Ice King.

Magic Man:

I hate magic man but he has the drive, the ambition, and the whole power thing going for him

Marceline the Vampire:

Proof you don’t have to be completely evil to be a Slytherin. She is cunning, smart, sarcastic and a fierce friend. She really goes out of her way for those she cares about but not just for anyone. 

Peppermint Butler:

Always has his own secret agenda. He has the power, ambition, and cunning to take over the world and yet he is a butler for princess bubblegum... 

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Winnie the Pooh Houses

Hufflepuff:

One of the few shows starring a Hufflepuff

Ravenclaw:

Just tell us everything wise owl.

Gryffindor:

So. Much. Bouncing.

Slytherin:

The ambition... the drive... always having your things ruined... must be a slytherin

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What it looks like when I'm angry

Cute like a Hufflepuff Powerful like a Slytherin

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So much appreciation for this

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Classic Slytherins

Best role models around

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When your evil plans don't go as expected:

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When your evil planning is going well:

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When someone thinks you're a Hufflepuff but you're a Slytherin

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Why you need a Hufflepuff friend

As a Slytherin, It is way to easy to find yourself in trouble. Sometimes, It’s great trouble, necessary trouble but it becomes too easy to cross that threshold of trouble and you won’t know you’re in too much trouble until you get punched in the face by a Gryffindor and by that time, it’s too late. 

Now, a Hufflepuff will love to get into the fun kind of trouble but they will also let you know when you are crossing the line. I have a lot of Hufflepuff friends who will just take me by the hand and say, 

“We can try that evil take-over the world plan some other time, why don’t we go watch Netflix and eat cookies right now?” 

Then, they give you that honest, adorable puppy-dog-like look and you just can’t help but agree. They secretly save the world on a regular basis. 

Now I know what you’re thinking... What about the other houses? 

Let me tell you...

A Ravenclaw is too logical. They will calculate how possible your evil world take over plan is and they might even give you the probability of you getting into too much trouble. They will assume that if the risks are too high that it would just make sense to change the plan instead of looking at the 1% chance of success as a glimmer of hope that it’s possible. They’ll assume you’ll come to your senses and they will want to watch to see how their hypothesis matches up to the results but they won’t tell you not to. 

A Gryffindor will somehow think you are testing their bravery which means they will either go with your plan despite seeing the danger to prove their bravery or they will tell you off and that’ll just make you carry out the plan in spite of them. Which is when they will come back around and punch you in the face.

Another Slytherin won’t see the danger line unless they’ve already crossed it. They will just join your plans unless they don’t have any interest. 

Hufflepuffs keep Slytherins grounded. 

Slytherins help Hufflepuffs have fun. 

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About Me (and this blog)

As a kid growing up with Harry Potter, I always fancied myself as a Gryffindor. I walked around with my head held high in blissful ignorance claiming to everyone who asked that “I am a true Gryffindor” with absolutely no doubts. 

You see, I knew I wasn’t a Hufflepuff. I’m just not that nice. I mean sure I can smile and wave and nod like any decent human being but my inner dialog can often be harshly hilarious as my friends know all to well. It makes it easy for people who don’t know me that well to confuse me with a kind, adorable, lovely Hufflepuff which is just the way I like it. I’m like a wolf in sheep’s clothing-- luring people in with my cuteness before I reveal my true cunning objectives. 

I also knew I was certainly not a Ravenclaw. I am a nerd. I have always been a smart nerdy person but I’ve never valued intelligence over everything else. I enjoy being really good at something but I can’t sit and research something for hours or remember what I learned the next day kind-of-thing. I also knew, while I love riddles, I would hate to get stuck outside the common room because I couldn’t solve the riddle to get in. I know my limits. 

It wasn’t until the Pottermore original sorting quiz that I was asked the question I had been avoiding for some time. “What if you get Slytherin?”

I always shrugged it off and laughed with my friends. Slytherin doesn’t have any characters that I can really relate to so I always saw it as the evil, whiney, kind of lame house. I thought the idea of the underwater common room was awesome and I would joke that I’m secretly evil and would mistakenly end up there but I had never truly considered the house. As you might have guessed, I was sorted into the Slytherin house after taking my first potter more quiz and I laughed. A lot of people said it was inaccurate and it was eventually taken down and replaced by the new quiz so I thought very little of it. It wasn’t until I took the second quiz and still got overwhelmingly Slytherin that the gears started to turn in my head. I re-took the quiz, answering with some of my second choice answers because it was too hard to pick out which house they were leaning towards but the outcome remained the same and my immediate reaction was “No, I am not a Slytherin!” I took to the internet finding the hundreds of quizzes that other people created to help you get sorted into the correct house and STILL the outcome remained the same: I am a Slytherin. 

I felt defeated. I disliked all the things I knew the house stood for in the movies and the books and felt a little disheartened. Surely, I couldn’t identify with the whiney, spoiled brat Malfoy or Anyone who sided with him. But if you get away from the movie and the books and take a good look at the attributes of a true Slytherin, my opinion started to shift. I found a few posts that started with “You Know You’re a Slytherin When..” and started to identify with the things people were saying belonged to Slytherin. Like saying “Oh, honey... “ a lot. and the thought of “using any means to achieve their end” resonated with me. 

I value resourcefulness over knowledge, cunning over bravery, and determination over kindness. It was then I realized that I am a true Slytherin.

Now when anyone asks me my house, I smile slyly and proudly state “I am a Slytherin”