#and i have a bunch of thoughts about stuff

[oxnhorse]

Came home from college and told Dad that my gay frat house was told they were an unruly bunch that needed a dorm parent and that I thought he'd enjoy it there.

So Dad says, WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME? I tell him, ALMOST ALL THE GUYS ARE HAVING SEX WHEN THEY COME BACK AFTER CLASSES TO STUDY, COLLEGE TOLD MY FRAT PRESIDENT, WE HAD 3 DAYS TO FIND A DORM PARENT.

Dad says, DID YOU BRING YOUR PRESIDENT HOME TO TALK WITH ME ABOUT THE IDEA? I said, YEAH DAD, BUT YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE HIM.

Dad says, SHUT THE FUCK UP AND BRING HIS NAKED ASS IN HERE TO ME. So I yell for this guy to come and meet Dad.

I about had a heart attack when Dad met a 6'8 smooth black man with a 15 inch anaconda swinging as he walked in. Dad roars, HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PLAN TO PLEASE ME, SO I DON'T FUCK YOUR ASS AND BREED YOU?

He says, THE FRAT PARENT HAS THE RIGHT TO DETERMINE HOW WE LIVE UNDER YOUR GUIDEANCE.

Dad says, EVEN IF I COMMAND ALL OF YOU TO BE NAKED HOW IS THAT ANY DIFFERENT THAN NOW? DAD YELLS, HOW ARE YOU GONNA PLEASE MY HORNY SELF AND MAKE ME SATISFIED THAT I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE?

He grins as he walks over to Dad, sits on his cock to his pubes, starts rubbing his chest; all of this making Dad moan, and says, IF YOU NEED ME TO BE YOUR NAKED SLAVE, I'M THE ONLY ONE AT THE HOUSE THAT SERVES AS MAID, BUTLER AND HOUSE CLEANER, AND NOTHING GETS ME HORNY LIKE A HAIRY DADDY AND HIS SON THAT CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF EACH OTHER.

Dad says, WHAT ABOUT ALL MY STUFF HERE?

As this dark stud starts fingering Dad's mouth, he says, IF YOU NEED ME TO CLEAN ON WEEKENDS, WE CAN BRING ALL THE FRAT HERE FOR HOUSECLEANING WHILE, YOU, YOUR SON AND I FUCK IN YOUR BED.

[swampjawn]

If you wanted to animate an object spinning really fast, there are three main embellishments at your disposal. You could add smear frames, you could add doubling, or if you wanted to get a little crazy with it, you could have that object bend and stretch to really emphasize the inertia of the motion.

Or you could do all three at the same time!

I didn't want to like Zenshu at first.

Saying I'm not a big fan of isekai as a genre would be an understatement, so I was straight up peeved when I found out that what I initially thought would be a flawed industry's unflinching look in the mirror made by THE studio that has become the symbol of the Japanese animation industry's broader problems with overworking and underpaying, this was just gonna be yet another in a long line of paint-by-numbers escapist power fantasies in a genre that was tired from the moment it was born, just like yaboy, sleepy to the max if you know what I'm saying.

And this recreation of a scene from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984), (which was one of the first breakout roles for anime legend and Evangelion director Hideaki Anno) certainly helped soften my attitude towards it, but a series of references to old stuff wouldn't be enough.

(both versions trimmed here)

But its tribute to classic anime and animation in general goes beyond just references.

This absurdly over the top modernized version of a magical girl transformation animated by Keisuke Toyoda (豊田 桂祐 ) feels like it contains all the possibilities of animation and imagination in just 3 preposterously dense cuts. There is just WAY too much going on here at once, in a way that feels very self aware.

Every color you could imagine, lighting from three different directions, what looks like three different layers of effects and sparkles, countless compositing effects, what looks like some sort of 3D particle simulation in the background,

this psychedelic background art that seems to represent Natsuko's blood vessels, a bit where you can see what it took me several episodes to realize are Natsuko's actual blood vessels and skeleton through her body,

and… some birds of course.

Most of the main elements are animated on 2's, but there are so many layers -- the timing of each offset from the rest -- that it almost feels like the whole thing is animated on 1's because there is practically no single frame where at least something doesn't change.

It's really an assault to the senses that contrasts hilariously with the mundane action of actually sitting down at a desk and drawing. There's even a little death note reference thrown in there to poke fun at this contrast!

And fully committing to the sailor moon bit, they repeat this stock animation in almost every episode. While it's no masterpiece plot-wise, it is at least more than I expected on that front too, but that's more than I can get into here. I talk about that some more and a bunch of other stuff in this video, from which this post is an adapted excerpt! Go watch it and comment, "wow sWIMP John, I used to like your videos but you've really fallen off hardcore. Go back to making magic school bus AMVs. Unsubbed."

[cryptotheism]

Have there been any works that you've read that you would say have genuinely changed your life? Reading your posts on occultism suggests that there's a careful balance to be struck between acknowledging when something is woowoo and letting oneself be affected by the material one takes in. As a recovering embittered cynic, I'm curious as to how one engages emotionally/spiritually with a work while simultaneously recognizing that a non-insignificant portion of it is hogwash.

idk it's like reading philosophy. You don't really believe or disbelieve in the works of Aristotle, you kinda just read him and now you know what Aristotle thinks about a bunch of stuff.

I dont think I've read a single text that truly revolutionized my worldview, but the process of putting it all together has been quietly profound. I feel like I have a highly nuanced understanding of why people belive in ostensibly strange things, how systems of thought interact with themselves, and how the world shapes systems of thought.

[monkebearness]

Rereading the Mixed Messages

Kamimoto Kotone (tripleS) x Male Reader

Tags: fluff, angst, friends-to-lovers, alcohol

Word count: 11.9k

a/n: hello, it's me again. this post was supposed to be a smut with a different story and characters, but 'cause it was a special someone's birthday (five days ago), I chose to write this instead. anyways, if you like fluffs, I hope you enjoy this one.

A woman wearing a backpack has been waiting in a hallway right outside the comfort room. She saw her friend rushing towards him, while on her right hand, the handout brochure she received eleven minutes ago wrinkled more and more, thanks to her tightening grip.

“Tone-yah!” the man shouted with relief. “There you are, thank goodness.”

“Junghoon-ah!” she called him, hurrying and somewhat in her voice, especially as she saw him already sweating. “Where the heck have you been? I thought we’d meet here.”

“I’m sorry for taking you so long. I, uhh, I just asked someone to be our guide,” he pointed to the direction beside him with his thumb.

“You just went to someone?” Concern started to radiate from her voice.

“Yeah, and I think he’s a senior who can help us out.”

“You think?” her eyebrow automatically raised slightly, as with her cadence.

“I guess… “ he surmised. “He definitely looks like a sunbae. He’s wearing a gwajam.”

“You should've just waited for me. I was in the restroom for like only five minutes, before you went all Seoul searching on our own campus like some tourist.”

“Well, I panicked, arasseo?” he raised his hands in defense. “I just found him along with a bunch of other students, but he’s the one who stepped up… And besides, he’s willing to assist us. So whatever the case may be, he may know a lot more stuff than we do.”

“You didn’t have to bring anyone, Junghoon!” she couldn’t stop herself from freaking out. “We could’ve toured the campus by ourselves and everything would've been just fine. It’s not like we’re already late or anything… Isn’t that why we went here early?”

“Calm down. But yeah, that’s… A good point,” he scratched his head. “But maybe we should hear him out first. Give him a chance first… We gotta respect our seniors.”

A groan left her mouth, just as a tall man in his university jacket approached them with a welcoming beam. Kotone watched Junghoon as he bowed to him in sight, prompting her to follow his gesture, but with less enthusiasm and more caution towards the older student.

“Annyeonghasimnikka!” he greeted them with his hoarse yet cheerful voice. “I’m Kim Myungsoo.” He turned to Junghoon for a second. “You told me you have a little trouble navigating around campus.” His eyes then met Kotone’s. “So I assumed that both of you are freshmen.”

“Ne,” Junghoon politely answered him. “I kinda also assumed you were a senior, but I am really sorry if I got the wrong impression.”

“I’m actually a sophomore, but don’t worry, ‘cause I’m actually flattered.” he chortled at his own nonchalant response. “And of course, I’d be more than happy to help you… It is orientation day, after all... But, do you mind me asking what your names are?”

“I’m Geum Junghoon,” he bows, before turning to the woman. “And my friend here is…”

In her eyes, his face looks like he’s a model or a young actor who played either a main or supporting role in a romcom college drama. That might have been too specific, but that’s just how Kotone thought about him that morning. Watching romcoms in her spare time was an undeniable factor to that mentality. She didn’t know whether to be enticed or intimidated—or both—by his striking looks, towering stature, and courteous approach. But she might have been staring at her for too long. She should be saying something to him now. She should’ve because they’re now looking at her.

“Koton—” she hesitates at first, making the senior and her friend lean their head to the side while the former lets out a low, huh? Correcting her error within milliseconds due to internal panic, she clears her throat. “Mianhaeyo. My name is Kamimoto Kotone.”

“Oh! You must be Japanese then?” Myungsoo guessed, almost with a higher pitch, something that fascinated the woman because of his reaction. “An exchange student?”

“No. I'm just living here with my relatives,” she corrected him, before following up with, “But you are right about the first one. I was born and raised in Japan.”

“Ah… It’s nice meeting you, Junghoon and Kotone,” he bowed down to them. “First things first, welcome to Seoul State University.”

“Kamsahamnida, sunbaenim,” Junghoon professed as he bowed back, compelled by his habit of being respectful towards him. Too respectful, as Kotone would think, even though she herself bowed much lower this time.

“Oh, that's fine. It's my pleasure to help out more of our Seoulmates, you know?”

Suddenly, Kotone laughed through her nose.

“So, now… On more pressing matters, what are you guys majoring in?”

“Tone’s from the College of Education,” Junghoon answered. “I’m from Tourism and Hotel Management.”

“I'm also from Education!” Myungsoo applauded his answer. “Seems like we already have something in common then, Kotone-ssi. Plus Junghoon’s building is only right next to ours, so that'll be convenient for both of you.”

Junghoon nudged her left shoulder with a smirk. “You still regretting my decision? You've got yourself a new friend!” he mumbled while they followed his trail.

She scoffed at his retort. “Fair enough. He's fine… You did good.”

“And Junghoon,” the upperclassman turned to them. “I’ve actually met someone from your department. His name’s Lim Honggi. Does the name sound familiar to…”

As the two had a conversation, Kotone’s attention towards Myungsoo grew from the moment forward. After several minutes of strolling around the nearby locations, they arrived right in front of the building of Junghoon’s department. It was like Tone was a protective noona sending off a younger sibling to go on his own (they're the same age), even though Junghoon insisted that they go ahead, right after bowing to Myungsoo out of gratitude.

“Do you mind if I take you there as well?”

Such a question struck Kotone with panic, but not enough to trigger a fight-or-flight response. Instead, it let her own guard down. “Oh… Uhh… You don’t have to do that, sunbaenim… Don’t you have a class to catch up to?”

“In about thirty minutes, yeah… But we’re heading to the same building anyway,” he pointed out. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh, right!” she exclaimed out of the sudden, slowly pursing her own lips out of embarrassment.

“Unless you’re uncomfortable, then I can just leave you alone. I’m sure you know your way to your room. It’s just that—”

“No!” she exclaimed again, even though she knew he was right. “I still have half an hour before our first class, so it’s fine, really.”

That was the start of their something.

“Myungsoo-yah!” Someone calls him with a teasing tone as he approaches them. “There you are! The council told me you were busy briefing freshies… Speaking of which.”

“Yeah… They were right,” Myungsoo quipped.

“Oh, don’t mind me. I’ll be on my way—”

“It’s okay, sunbaenim,” Kotone assured both of them.

“This is Park Yeonghwan,” Myungsoo proceeded with the introductions. “My classmate and friend. This is Kotone. She’s a freshie.”

“Annyeonghaseyo,” Kotone bowed to him. “It’s nice meeting you, sunbaenim.”

His mouth opened, as if he had heard a spell leave her mouth. “Kotone? Are you—”

“Yes, she is Japanese,” Myungsoo stopped him, right as Kotone was about to open her mouth. “You get the point, dude… She must be tired hearing that from everyone else.”

“Gwenchanayo, sunbae,” Kotone stepped in. “But, he’s right. About the Japanese part.”

Yeonghwan chuckled at his interjection, but Kotone herself felt a tug at her heartstrings. “She said it’s fine. Don’t be too defensive, hyung.”

“Hyung?” she tilted her head. “Wait, I thought both of you are sophomores.”

“Oh, you don’t know?” Yeonghwan confessed. “He’s a year older than me.”

Within seconds, she did some mental math for an educated guess. “So that makes you, like, twenty years old?”

He didn’t answer her directly. “I hope that doesn’t make you more uncomfortable.”

A few realizations crossed her mind. Seeing someone was the last thing she wanted right now. There was more to this interaction than just attraction. After all, she's been friends with Junghoon since middle school. Befriending a guy is not a big deal for her. Kotone only chuckled at his hesitation. “It doesn’t… I actually think we’ll get along just fine.”

“You think so?” both guys asked in unison, somewhat bewildered and impressed by her sudden surge of confidence.

“Yeah,” she cheered on. “It’s a good conversation starter for a lot of people I meet, so I can't blame them for that.”

“Phew…” Yeonghwan let out. “That’s nice to know—” he felt a buzzing in his pocket.

“You good, man?” Myungsoo inquired as he and Kotone watched Yeonghwan quickly read his screen within seconds.

“Oh, yeah… I gotta dip, man,” he informed, still holding his phone in his hand. “The council needs me for another meeting. Something about plans for the homecoming festival. But,” he turned to Kotone with a sly smile. “I won’t be giving away too much. It is for the freshies after all...”

“Do they need more help or—?”

“Nah, nah, I got this! We got this,” he reassured him. “They know you're on tour guide duties for the rest of the morning, so you keep doing you.”

“Oh… Okay, then. I’ll catch up with you guys later at class.”

“Sure. Later, hyung!” He turned to the freshie and bowed to her one more time. “It’s nice meeting you, Kotone-chan.”

She bowed back as Yeonghwan walked away from them. “Forgive me for him being a bit too casual,” Myungsoo let out a chuckle.

“Nah, it’s okay, sunbaenim.” Her smile widened. “I kinda like that kind of approach. I gotta admit, it’s pretty refreshing meeting someone new. Someone who isn't just from my own class.”

A smile also formed on Myungsoo’s face before looking at her yellow backpack. There’s three keychains he noticed in his glance. The lowest zipper contained the head of a red lesser panda. The one in the middle was a Sanrio character, whose name he definitely didn’t remember at the time. All he knew was that it was a punk rabbit, wearing a black hat with a pink skull. However, the uppermost one was an odd yet captivating design, dangling around the top zipper. Due to the chain resembling tulips, one would think of it like a twisted looking flower… Until, he realizes it’s a mouth.

“Hey… “ Myungsoo couldn’t help but point his finger. “That’s a pretty cool Demogorgon keychain!”

He knows what it is? She realized, turning her head in his direction. “Oh, thanks! It helps pickpockets rethink their decision.”

The sophomore let out a laugh. “That’s actually a nice strategy. No one wants to be taken in the Upside Down unless you’re the Mind Flayer. Or Vecna.”

“So, umm, you watch Stranger Things too?” she asked him with eyes of intrigue.

“Yeah, yeah!” he hollered, just as his enthusiasm gradually lowered. “Well, I loved the first two seasons.”

“Just the first two?” she raised an eyebrow, albeit mischievously.

“The third season’s a bit meh for me, to be honest,” he answered with a light shrug. “But the new one is still growing on me.”

“That’s an interesting take,” she professed. “I'm sure they're not as questionable as your anime takes? Or are you not a fan of one?”

Her playful taunt allured him, making him cross his arms. “Oh, don't hesitate to test me, Miss Kamimoto. I think you'll be surprised.”

Mutual interests were only the start. As both the seasons and semesters passed, they would live and learn that they have a lot more things in common than once thought. More things to talk about. More to bond over.

= =

Sophomore year, first semester. The two were at the garden when a flock of birds flew out the trees hearing her sudden burst of scream. Thankfully, no one else was there. At least no one who cared enough to pay attention.

“Junghoon got himself in trouble,” Kotone would often confide in Myungsoo. Perhaps this moment was one of the most serious talks they had with each other, even though it’s only been a year since they met.

“What? How did it happen?” He was just as confused, considering how he’s treated Junghoon as a younger brother. “He didn’t tell me about any problem in his class.”

“Of course he wouldn’t…” she grumbled. “That’s how he’s always been… But Honggi told me about it, and right when I confronted him about it, he brushed it off and told me not to worry! Like, how can I not worry about that?”

Myungsoo could feel the emotions beyond the surface of her irritation, one that she’s been trying to suppress while around him.

“He’s become a pushover. Again, ” she sighed. “Ugh… Why is he still like this?”

“Did his teammates threaten him?” he began asking his questions of concern.

“Worse,” she admitted. “It was a pair project, and he did it all by himself!”

Hearing the situation dwindled down his tension, though his worry for Kotone and Junghoon persisted. “So… No one threat—”

“No one threatened, or appeased him!” her voice elevated again. “Yeah, you got that right. His professor doesn’t even know, and it looks like it'll stay that way.”

“Maybe he has a reason,” he considered. “Was the partner sick? Or maybe they had an emergency? I know Junghoon isn't the most confrontational guy but I doubt he’d keep letting a classmate be a freeloader, especially on a pair project.”

“I don’t know… He said his sunbae was busy with her organization and that he used her references, but that’s not enough.”

“Sounds like he felt bad for her too.”

“I feel bad for him!” she countered.

“I am worried for him, too… But like you’ve said, he didn’t get punished for it. He didn’t even feel bad for what he did, even if, I had to admit, it was a bit too far that he did the project all by himself. He’ll be fine, Tone-yah… We can talk to him tomorrow.”

“Who is he even trying to impress in that situation?” she countered him. “He’s one to be interested in relationships.”

“Well,” he let out a chortle. “I guess, there’s a first time for everything.”

“Maybe, but I’ll still be keeping an eye on that Park Sohyun.”

“Wait. Park Sohyun’s his partner? That’s odd. And a bit reassuring for Junghoon.”

“Why? Do you know her?”

= =

Sophomore year, second semester. It was after class when Kotone asked Myungsoo to meet her outside their building. He could whiff a much stronger perfume the more she walked closer. Her loud voice would call out to him right after. “Oppa!” Especially with her outfit of a fit aesthetic shirt under a denim jacket (and not to mention her soft blush, mascara, and a warmer shade of lipstick), he almost mistook her for someone else for a second. “Thanks for meeting me here.”

“You look…” He stopped his sentence halfway, still in spectacle at her somewhat new look and style. “Fancier. You look fancier than usual. What’s the occasion?”

“Well…” she fixed her hair in front of him, inciting a quick gulp from Myungsoo, but not enough for her to hear it. “I’m going on a blind date with three of my friends and their companions tonight, and I want you to be there too with us.”

He placed his palm on his chest, dramatically leaning away from her. “Are you really inviting me to this just now? Without further notice?”

“Yeah, don’t you wanna be my plus one?” she held his hands. “They will like you, oppa. I’m sure you’ll get along with their plus ones too. Some of them are around your age.”

The longer she stared closer to him, her eyes slowly sparkled. He couldn’t even say ‘no’ for some dumb reason. “This is a bit too sudden, Tone.”

“Please…” her tone started to shift into a more cutesy one, as if she’s doing an aegyo. Or maybe that’s just how he often saw her face. He saw her new hair style. While a low bun isn’t anything new for Kotone, seeing it up close astounded Myungsoo. “It was pretty urgent. And I didn’t have anyone else to ask to come with me.”

He scoffed in disbelief. “Really? There’s no one else? A social butterfly like you?”

“Yah, I’m just a social caterpillar,” she quipped back. “If someone between us is the butterfly, it’s you, Mister Vice President of the SSU Visual Arts Organization!”

“That’s a fair point, but that’s hardly relevant, when you’re the one who asked me out on this…” he shot back. “Why didn’t you think of anyone else from the gang? Or even from your own block?”

She knew he was right, but she didn’t wanna give it up just yet, so she kept firing more reasons and excuses. “I thought of asking Yeonghwan-oppa or Honggi, but they seem like they do that by themselves anyway. I considered Junghoon, but he’s still busy on his shift tonight. And besides, this is the only time I’ve asked a favor, like c’mon...”

“I guess that’s true.” He sighed in resignation. In the silence of Kotone’s anticipation, he slowly slid his fingers through his hair before finally facing her. “Fine… But, I’m only going ‘cause you asked. But only this ti—”

Kotone squealed. “Gomawo, oppa! That’s a deal, alright? The meetup won’t be that far from here.”

= = =

Vacation, pre-junior year. Since their dorms were the closest to the university among best friends, they decided to meet on campus after lunch. It was a Saturday morning when Kotone had returned to Korea after a one-month vacation to her hometown.

“I know I’m a few days late,” she pulled out a pair of small silky bags from her pocket. “But, saengil chukhahaeyo.”

With eyes of curiosity and anticipation, Myungsoo inspected the bags. It took him a second to guess the gift, but he was familiar with it. They're omamori. Two of them. Red and pink. Considering he wasn’t too knowledgeable of Japanese, Kotone briefly explained the writings to them. “That’s a kenku, and that one’s an en-musubi.”

“What do they mean?”

“Kenku’s for good health and long life. Cliche, I know,” Kotone giggled, before she took a swift deep breath, though he barely noticed. “But the en-musubi is for finding luck in love.”

He slid his fingers on each, feeling the smooth texture of the charm, mesmerized by their design. “Woah… This looks legit. I mean, you know, it’s pretty. It’s authentic.”

She chuckled at his observation. “Of course, it is. I bought that in Meiji Jingu. I actually bought each two for you and the boys, but I decided to give yours first.”

“I-uhhh… I don’t know what to say… Gomawo, Tone.”

“You’re welcome, oppa… That’s for the Orbit merch you gave me.”

“Those were your birthday gifts… You deserved that.”

“You better not lose these within a year,” she added with more emphasis, staring at the two charms.

“I'll do my best. Especially for the love charm,” he teased, which only provoked the woman as her eyes squinted at him in an instant. “My love life is now in your hands or something.”

“I’m kidding,” he chuckled, as he looked down on both charms on his hand, caressing it with affection. “I won’t lose it, of course. They’re good charms… But if something does happen to these, which I won’t allow anything to happen to, you’re still gonna be my good charm, you know?”

Kotone felt a gulp on her throat. She chuckled nervously. “Flatterer.”

“That’s just the truth,” he justified himself. “You and the guys have always been my charms since we got together.” He faced her with a serious gaze and closed smile, putting his right hand on her left shoulder. “I couldn’t be more grateful for that.”

Dugeun… “Myungsoo-oppa.” Dugeun…

“And look who’s back!” A familiar male voice yelled from behind, startling only the woman. It’s Yeonghwan, with Honggi and Junghoon, right beside him, as they all rushed to the pair behind the bench with excitement.

“Kamjagiya!” Kotone did not expect their presence, which only elevated her heartbeat. “Guys! What the hell? I thought y’all won’t be making it today!” She turned to the quiet one among them. “Junghoon-ah, you even said that you’re working at the CVS today.”

“Well, actually… The boss told me I can take one day off during the weekend until summer break ends,” he explained. “Plus, why would we ever miss your arrival?”

“So the three of you just planned this surprise without telling me?”

“It’s actually our plan,” Myungsoo revealed. “All of us wanted to surprise you.”

“Oh… Well, that’s a bummer… I would’ve brought the rest of your gifts.”

“That’s okay… The gifts can come later.” Honggi started to make circle motions with his hand on his tummy. “You’ll make it up for us some other way.”

She and Myungsoo laughed at his subtle suggestion, knowing well what he meant. What they all meant. She breathed through her nose. “Where do you guys wanna have lunch?”

Cheers erupted from the three, making her laugh more and widening her smile at the reaction and sight of all her closest friends, who gathered with her.

= = =

Junior year, first semester. The campus had been set up with dozens of different and unique booths, as plenty of clubs and organizations had prepared them in the past week. So far, the week-long university festival has been going well on its third day. From arcades and treasure hunts to readings and talent shows, hundreds of students and visitors stroll and explore the university from seven to six… And it was no different for these two. Myungsoo was holding a small bouquet of flowers in his hand as Kotone was holding a stuffed toy bunny while they walked across the crowd.

“You finally tried that spirit animal booth yet?” Myungsoo wondered.

“Oh, yeah!” she clapped on the bunny toy with her left hand as if she were a seal with flippers. “That was the funnest one I’ve had so far... They really made a lot of effort making that one, so I applaud them.”

“More than your own club’s booth?” He teased her with the question.

“Well,” she had caught his intention, prompting her to raise the confidence in her delivery. “Nothing else beats our treasure hunt, of course, so it’s a close second… Maybe I’ll consider the Lyrical Booth too some other time.”

“Oh…” his mouth slowly opened in anticipation. “Are you finally gonna be showing your rapping skills at the workshop? While at it, why not join the talent contest too—”

“Yah, I’m just considering!” she reacted with remarkable alertness. “Don’t be too excited. It might not even happen, if you keep on prying.”

“Why not?” He opened his arms wide, much to her slight embarrassment. “I can be your hype boy!”

Her eyes moved to the side, staring at him. “You mean hype man?”

“Yeah, yeah. My bad… I got it mixed up from that song from last year.”

“It’s fine…” she brushed off. “What’s what the Noraebang Booth does to you anyways. They got a lot of bangers since yesterday, so I can’t blame ya.”

“But I’m still wondering, what was your result on the animal test from earlier?”

“Oh, yeah… As expected, I’m a lesser red panda! Nothing new there,” she exclaimed. “How about you?”

“Eh…” he huffed. “I really don’t wanna mention it.”

“Oh, come on. That’s not fair,” she nudged him on his left shoulder. “Are you keeping things from us more because you now have—”

“Myungsoo-yah! Tone-chan!” A woman walked towards them. One who has been both familiar to them since the past and a half year. “There you are!”

“Annyeong, Yooyeon-unnie!” Kotone waved at her, witnessing both her friends meet.

“I just had a walk with Tone,” Myungsoo walked closer to her, holding her hands with exhilaration. “You shouldn’t worry about me too much, noona.”

“Yah… I told you not to call me that,” Yooyeon lowered her voice. “Not in front of everyone, anyways.” She turned to Kotone. “And thanks for looking after him… Tone-chan. You must’ve been exhausted keeping up with all his yapping.”

“Hey,” Myungsoo interjected, embarrassed by the woman’s remark.

Kotone chortled. “That’s no problem, unnie. He was being less chatty this time…” She poked his left elbow. “So that made things a little easier for me. And himself.”

“Hmm… That's unusual for my boyfriend.” She leaned closer into him, speaking her breath closely while he exhaled a smile with excitement. “Maybe I shall give him a better, more thorough check up inside our booth?”

As she witnessed their sweet and suggestive moment, Kotone felt a sensation travel down her spine. Her heartbeat increases, seeing their faces only an inch away from each other’s. Her fingers clenched as her smile tightened as their lips touched. “I, uhh, I’ll go look after Junghoon and Honggi at their booths. You two just have fun, alright?”

“Are you sure you don't wanna tag along with us?” Myungsoo tried to talk her out.

“And be a third wheel? Ah, no thanks,” she scoffed with a more playful undertone. His persistence to make her stay somewhat struck a nerve, but she didn’t mind it for long. “You two rarely get the chance to hang out since preparation week. Look, unnie, he even got you a mini you. Those flowers weren’t enough for him.”

“Awww… You got these for me?” Yooyeon cooed at Myungsoo, taking both gifts as they embraced.

He accepted a kiss from her on his cheek. “I just thought since it’s the festival, it’d be a nice way to help one of the arcade booths and bring you something at the same time.”

“You and your excuses, babe. And of course, you’re welcome to tag along with us, Tone-chan...” the older woman quipped to Kotone, letting out a giggle beside Myungsoo. “Who else knows better than us than our own matchmaker?”

Flattery was what she felt. At least, it should have been her only reaction. Yet it's only the surface. A convincing cover to what her heart was telling her… “I’ll be fine on my own. You two can pay me back by setting me up with someone, arasseo?”

“I'll be on the lookout, girl.” Yooyeon forms her fingers in the shape of a gun. ”You can count on me for that. I know a lot of fellas from our class, so just take your pick.”

Tone adored that her close friend was acting like that. She liked that both her close friends were happy. She did. She should.

“Sure, unnie…” she snorted. “Alright, now I really gotta go. Take care, love birds…”

But there was no point in ruining their moment by reminding them of their presence. By reminding herself. There’s nothing to gain from it. Nothing to gain from thinking about this longer than it should. She turned around and faced the crowd while still wearing her smile when she heard her clubmate’s cheerful voice.

“Have fun, Tone-chan! We’ll be at our booth, okay?”

They’re happy. It’s all that mattered.

= = =

Junior year, second semester. Things got more hectic, academic-wise, especially with seniors like Myungsoo finally reaching their final semester. But, even for juniors like Kotone, a lot more doors of opportunities opened for her… And that’s what the latter assured her when they talked by themselves in one of the campus gardens. She was told it was urgent, so the woman waited at one of the benches until he arrived.

“You should run as auditor, Kotone.”

“Me?” Her eyes widened, even standing up from her seat. “For the student council? Michyeosseo?”

“Come, Tone-yah… It’s gonna be productive for you... You’ll get to demonstrate your skills and talents outside class. Outside your little diamond dreamer club. Plus, even Yooyeon thinks you should venture out too.”

“That's easy for both of you to say, oppa.”

“Take it from me. I may already be a senior, but that doesn't stop me from trying out other responsibilities. And I don't see why you wouldn't do the same.”

“Oh, so you’re guilt-tripping me ‘cause it’s your last year, huh?”

“No, no, no! You don’t have to run. But you know, just think about it. Just my advice.”

He could only wait for her in silence. While the leaves above rustled along the winds and the branches blissfully swayed. Clinging her right index and thumb on her chin, Kotone's mind gradually shifted into a more rational route.

“Hmm… Now that you’ve brought it up,” she pondered. “Maybe it will give me more experience. Perhaps, it’ll be a great addition to my resume…”

“Now we’re talking.”

“But that doesn't mean I'll actually run for real, arasseo?” she pointed her index finger at him. I'm just considering all my options carefully.”

= = = =

Senior year, first semester. Kotone gained more exposure and some connections after becoming elected as the auditor of the Education Department’s Student Council, even after Myungsoo finally graduated with flying colors. But, there’s one thing she or any student can’t escape from. And such a laborious reality was something that she often dealt with, by spending time at the library before or after class.

After taking off her glasses, she sighed on the surface of the table right next to the stack of books she had compiled. “Would be nice to have Junghoon, Honggi, and Yeonghwan with us… Why did all of them have to enlist at a time like this? Couldn’t they just have waited their turn?”

“Yeonghwan said he just wanted to get it out of the way,” Myungsoo pointed out. Yes, he was still there. “I'm thinking the other two just thought he had a point.”

"That's such a silly answer. But yeah, it is pretty reasonable, I guess.”

“Or maybe they're just avoiding making their own theses,” he added.

“That's what I was thinking!” she almost bursted into laughter, but not before muffling her mouth with both her hands.

Myungsoo giggled as softly as he could. “Don’t worry... You still have me, right? What better way to work on your thesis than to ask for advice from your sunbae. When the boys get discharged, they’ll regret not being here with us… At least two of ‘em will.”

“Eeeeehh... You're only here 'cause you just extended your teaching assistant job in the first place!” She gave him a light punch on his left shoulder.

“Yah… Just because it's true, it doesn’t mean it's easy for me either.”

“Oh, poor you,” she sneered with a sarcastic undertone. ”Gotta wait for your girlfriend while the rest of us hoobaes have it so easy with our thesis, don’t we? Not to mention, I still have a meeting with the council later this afternoon!”

“Just so you know, I don't regret being here as much as you want me to. And Yooyeon still has another hour before her class ends, so I have no other choice but to stay here for a while as you babble in front of your laptop… And I gotta make sure that you're not just slacking around or snoring on your table.”

His argument only made her snicker. There was no point in arguing with a friend. This friend. “Well, I give up, so I’ll just say it. Thanks for the support, even if it’s just you being here with me.”

They lock eyes for a moment. No quips, no banters. Just the traces of their smile, just before a thought crawled up their blank minds... This may be the last year they’ll see each other like this. At least, with just the two of them. Perhaps, that’s for the best.

“Anytime, Tone-chan… What are friends for?”

Especially because of that.

= = = = = = = = =

“One matcha latte for Changmin! Your order is now ready for pickup,” an automated voice calls out from the counter. A man, in his early twenties, stands up from his seat right after the call, parting from his friends for a moment to fetch his order.

It's 12:00 P.M., and the cafe is already flooding with customers, most of whom are students and professors on their break. The calendars on the kiosks state February 7, 2031. On their table, twenty-six-year-old Kotone has been facing a twenty-eight-year-old Myungsoo from her seat in the last half an hour, surrounded by their now almost empty disposable cups, their laptops, and distinct bags on the chair beside them. His eye bags are more noticeable than usual. He’s still tall, although his latest figure appears a little more “mesomorphic,” as she tries to describe it herself mentally, though it doesn’t bother her. It’s not uncommon to gain weight in their late twenties, what’s the big deal?

Thankfully, there was no sense of awkwardness in their atmosphere. Why would there be? They were close friends. They were there for each other at their highest and lowest points for more than four years. If his mere new look bothered her, then their friendship was all pointless and for nothing. Besides, there’s other reasons to be awkward about.

It ain't the first time she's seen him after graduation, thanks to social media and some social gatherings that she tried to avoid in the last few years. But, seeing him now, it's something else. Something that she can't describe, considering the fact she’s been paying attention to his face as much as she is to his words, probably a little more.

“This is a really, really big project… You really sure you wanna do this, Kotone?”

“You don’t have to do it with me. I can just write and send a request letter to the Dean instead, if they need any more proof or confirmation that we’re sincere about this.”

“No, Tone-yah,” he insists. “Since I already agreed to meet with you, I can handle that.”

“How about you, Myungsoo-oppa,” she asks him, her tone’s a mix between a playful intimidation, covering her slight hint of concern. “Do you think this is a lost cause?”

“Of course, it’s not a lost cause,” he reassures. “I wanna help you. Not just because I’ve been teaching here for four years now, but I believe why you wanna do this… Honestly, it’s not that selfish to think about making some reunion possible.”

Her eyes light up with optimism, contrasting her somewhat smug front. “Really?”

“Almost every alumni homecoming we’ve had were for middle-aged folks. Which is fine, no offense to them, but people our age often forget that we were students once too, back in the day. This is a chance for us to remind them that it’s okay to think about and yearn for those times. You don’t need to be in your forties to attend a college reunion… right?”

Her heartbeat slowly becomes louder. “Well…” She clears her throat. “That’s well said. I couldn’t have put it better myself. Besides, Yoon-daepyonim already had this approved, so it would really irritate her if this doesn’t go through.”

“I know you guys do galas for socialites and folks at corpo every year,” he scratches his chin slowly. “But I didn’t know ModHaus would also be into organizing alumni parties. Like, I don’t know if that’s like an upgrade or a desperate rebranding from them.”

“We’ll plan, organize, and host just about anything, if we think it’s worth planning,” she crosses her arms, raising an eyebrow. “We’re not called the company of all possibilities for nothing. And, we don’t just do it for corporations... Ever since she took over, we’re not like that anymore. For the better.”

“Well, I can’t deny that. But whatever the case is… Tell your boss not to worry too much…” He offers his left hand. “Let’s do well on this project, Miss Kamimoto.”

Such an act of formality from an old friend makes her giggle, a response that she tries to cover up by clearing her throat immediately after. Leveling her eyes with her friend, she holds his hand with her right. “Couldn’t agree more, Professor Kim. Let’s do our best.”

And as their hands shake through this meetup, the Reunion Party of Batch 2025-2026 has been set in motion throughout this month. Through weekly meetings, Myungsoo helps Kotone become acquainted with some of the current alumni committee of the SSU. Most were new faces, about a few years younger. Some were familiar, most of which were either older or the same age as hers.

“Kotone-ssi! It really is you. You barely aged a day.”

“Ne! Annyeonghaseyo, sunbae. And please, it seems that time has been kinder to you.”

“Sunbaenim!” another one approaches her. “It’s wild, and an honor, seeing you here, considering how blessed you are, working at one of the richest companies in Korea.”

“Nah, I beg to differ!” she humbles herself. “I wouldn’t even have gotten to ModHaus if I never spent my time here in Seoul State… The honor’s on me, knowing how passionate and dedicated you all are in helping to plan this event.”

“And just to assure you,” she added. “You will all be compensated for your service.”

Her reminder sparks wholehearted laughter and cheers from the committee. “We’re not doing this for money, Kotone-ssi… But just so you should know, we can’t deny that kind of promise.”

“Well, it’s finally settled then.” She claps her hand. “Hwaiting, yeorobun!”

The planning and execution would take a couple of months, perhaps a little longer than their timeframe, as both the representatives from Tone’s company and the SSU alumni committee would have to juggle between fulfilling their regular duties at their personal works and making this brand new event beyond merely possible.

“ModHaus will provide their services as much as they can, so don’t worry about asking our affiliates for help, everyone. This also counts as our project, after all.”

But what makes this period more than memorable for Kotone was not only the people she’s been reunited with. They are still at the preparation stages, after all. They would have team lunches here and there. Revisiting the university itself was the most special aspect for her, because of the memories it brought both of them back with each step in every stroll they took on campus before or after their meetings.

At noon, they bask in the sunlight, which, thankfully, is no longer as excruciating and dangerous to walk freely as it was years ago without the habitual routine of putting on some sunscreen during spring and summer. The pair would walk past the grass fields and the nearby blossoming gardens. Past the buildings old and new. There’s parts of themselves that never left. It was understandable for Myungsoo, but for Kotone, it’s quite eye-awakening to see her realization unfold with her eyes. From the students, professors, to the guests like her going on with their business. A group of friends chilling under the shade of the trees, inclining on the bench, with some lying even on the grass with no to little care about the dirt that just accumulated on their shirts and jackets.

She simply can’t take her eyes off her surroundings. With every live scenery to watch in a state of bliss, her gaze would find another to watch and appreciate. “I know a lot has changed since graduation, and yet, this place feels like yesterday.”

“Really?” Myungsoo teases her, following her gaze. “I honestly can’t tell the difference.”

“Yah, don’t ruin the moment…” she whines. “That’s ‘cause you’ve stayed here while most of us went our separate ways. Of course, you wouldn’t get it.”

He does. But he doesn’t say anything. Looking in her direction, he reminiscences much like her. “Hey, do you remember that time when we first hung out at these fields?”

Kotone now realizes that she underestimated him.

She thinks to herself, Maybe this is all just nostalgia. With all this ambition, maybe this is just me listening to my younger self, instead of focusing more and more at work and slaving myself to the executives, like I have always been.

“You know… If this doesn't end well, then consider it a cautionary tale for myself,” she admits her own misgiving, subconsciously opening and closing her hands in a sporadic pattern.

“It’ll go well, Tone,” Myungsoo senses the seeds of doubt already growing within her. “But, if it makes you feel any better, I'll join you on that lesson.”

She giggled, before sighing into the breeze. “Thanks, but I don’t know… I honestly just want to make this a reality for our batchmates. That’ll make me feel better. Besides, I made a bet with a few of my closest friends. Suhyeon, Kyubok, even Junghoon.”

He wants to comfort her—but hearing a familiar name is not something he’s heard in a while, but her last-second confession makes him laugh. “Junghoon’s doing well, I see… We rarely get to hear from the rest of the gang nowadays, and I only heard that he was the head chef at your company… But it’s actually nice to hear that from our youngest.”

She knows what he means, but she doesn’t want to ruin the vibe of their conversation. “Oh, he’s doing so much better, oppa… I actually want you to hear from him when the time comes. But that for now, all I can say is…”

Kotone begins to spill tea which astonishes Myungsoo. It’s only the start of this night. Bringing together scenes and sequences of memories from their collegiate past would continue to motivate them in making this event a reality, not just for themselves, but also for everyone else who will take part in this reunion.

= = =

March 2031. They start to spend more time meeting outside the university. On this day, the pair meet in a cafe outside the ModHaus building, which surprisingly enough, was Myungsoo’s suggestion. For once, he wants her to travel less, arguing that her anticipation for the reunion will wane if they keep meeting on campus grounds.

Straight from his backpack, he hands the woman a small box wrapped in a pink ribbon, which she opens. She’s in awe.

Kotone looks back at him. “What… What is this, Myungsoo-oppa?”

“Just a gift. It’s your birthday today, isn’t it? Saengil chukahaeyo.”

After a quick unboxing of the box, she gives the bottle a test spray inches away from her.

This isn’t just any perfume. This scent has brought her years of memories more vividly. Back to that afternoon. To a lot of afternoons. The garden. The flowers. It doesn't help since the man in front of her was mostly with her during those times. It’s not the exact same brand, but it’s enough for the woman to let out a sigh of longing, yearning for those moments even more.

“Wah…” she whiffs more of the scent. “I can’t believe it's been a long time since I've sprayed something like this.”

”Do you like it?” He remains reserved, even though he’s already seeing her reaction.

”How can I not? You're really making me excited about the reunion, you know that?”

“Well, I didn’t mean to…” he confessed. “But, if you think of it like that, then I’m glad that helped you be more pumped up for this event.”

Her eyes widen once again, only realizing now what he said earlier. “So, after all these times, you still remember my birthday, huh?”

“Yeah!” he cheers, nudging her shoulder. “Come on, Tone. What are friends for?”

Oh… A dart strikes her heart. Why is she feeling this? Why is she grateful, yet also hurt? Why does she feel that pang inside her? It’s nothing, a voice tells her. This isn’t the first time he’s given you a gift! “Oppa, this is too much. I don’t know what. How to repay—”

“You don’t need to repay anything. And just because you’re working hard, doesn’t mean you can’t have a little celebration. Most of our plans have been finalized! We’ve gotten this far thanks to you, so consider it as a reward.”

Maybe that’s enough. “Thank you for this, Myungsoo.”

She brushes this thought off with that self-reassurance. This thing isn’t about whatever she just considered in her mind. This is about the reunion. You’re being overdramatic around him. Just focus on your job now. “And speaking of finalized, I just have to ask again if you have proofread the whole invitation, haven’t you?”

“Yep, for the hundredth time. I’ve gone through the email. They did a great job with making it snappy and concise. They didn’t even use GPT to write those up.”

“Well, I trust your word… Let’s finally send it, shall we?”

“Of course, it’s your call, committee leader.”

“Stop,” she chuckles and with one deep breath, she takes one last scan of her invitation before hitting ‘send’ on the email with her index finger. Kotone braces herself for what’s about to come, looking back at Myungsoo as a reassuring closed smile forms on his face. “Let’s do our best, Tone-chan,” he raises his left hand, his fist closed.

His innocent face reminds her of a quote from a show that she watched decades ago. That damned smile. She reciprocates his gesture with her right hand with a chuckle, hoping to forget what she just felt earlier. Still, even that single bump of touching his skin sends a tingle through her veins.

= = =

April 2031.

Things got busier. Questions from invited guests build up. Scheduling conflicts between their sponsors and services begin to surface. With only a few weeks away, the committee has been doing their best, dividing their tasks in dealing with the problems step by step. On weekends, their responses to certain emails would take overnight.

“Let’s take a break first… We’ve done a lot tonight.”

Right as she closes her laptop, Kotone’s voice begins to crack. “O—okay…”

Myungsoo immediately sensed something’s off with her silence. He inched closer, slowly reaching his hand into her shoulder. “Tone-yah… Are you… alright?”

She struggles completing her words, completely giving into the chaos clashing in her heart and mind. “It's just… I miss them… It’s hard… to imagine… I just don’t want to disappoint them.”

Myungsoo has no words. Rather, he’s hesitant and fearful that he would only break her heart more than it already is. He doesn’t want to give false promises or high hopes, but he doesn’t want to let her down either. He listens to his heart, pushing himself to hold her shoulders, slowly wrapping his arms around them.

“I miss them too, Tone…” he mumbles, patting her on the back and caressing her hair as she lets out her tears in his embrace through a muffled whimper. “We’ll make this work, arasseo? I’m sure of it.”

= = =

On this Friday of May 2031, the reunion finally begins inside the Na Heedo Gymnasium.

And as they expected, not everyone could be there tonight. But the fact that more than a hundred invited guests arrived there has surpassed most of their expectations. Faces old and new dress up for the occasion, crossing paths with their old buddies from years ago.

The guests stand and stare at the spectacle that is the party. Hundreds of familiar faces, now several years older, laughing and grooving on the dance floor under the moonlight vibing at the playlist of Western and local pop music alike prepared by the DJ. It is still  several minutes before the program proper starts, allowing guests to keep bonding and being acquainted with each other inside or near the venue. Plentiful students, whether graduating or already graduates for a year or two, are present too, taking advantage of possible recruitment from their alumni, though they’d have to make some effort to get their attention, considering that fact that lot of alumni just wanted to party tonight by getting off some steam and escaping from their present.

“Tone-yah has really made it possible, huh,” Kim Chaeyeon shakes her head in amazement.

“I mean, it was like, almost four months in the making, right?” Kim Nakyoung wonders. “But damn. She really did it.” She claps her hand.

“Three months. But come on now,” Kotone herself joins them in a less formal dress. “It wouldn't be possible without y'all. There’d be no reunion without you guys and gals!”

“Omo, omo… Tone kudasai!” Lee Jiwoo hollers on. “The mastermind is finally here!”

“I just can't believe you and your committee managed to pull this off!” Dahyun cheers on, joining the huddle between women. “It paid off.”

She’s touched by their piles of praise. “Thanks for the compliments, y’all. I, uhh, I’m just really happy that you guys can make it here tonight.”

About four hours would go by, dozens of personal reunions take place not just inside the gymnasium, but also in the corridors, the outdoors, and even in the restroom. Let your imagination wild. Members of the committee would often check on each other, but for the most part, they’d only tell each other to enjoy the moment once their program had all wrapped up.

With nothing else to deal with, Kotone finds Myungsoo from a distance. Maybe it’s simply the magical atmosphere that the event has conjured throughout the campus tonight, but to her, it's like when she first met him during orientation week. Her heart tells her to do it. To walk up to him. Nothing can stop her now. Why keep hesitating.

Right as her eyes catch Yooyeon approaching him with two empty glasses in her hands.

She can feel her own heart pulling away, dragging down like an anchor with every beat. This isn't college, nor is it not high school either. Well, you definitely did not think this through, her ego tells her over the deafening gymnasium.

“So…” she hears someone else’s familiar voice from behind. “It still really is him. After all those years.”

She turns around. “I don't know what you're talking about, Junghoon-ah.”

“You don't have to tell me anything, Tone…” he snickers. “But, maybe it's better if you talk things out with him.”

“Nothing is going on, dude,” she keeps dismissing his claim with a smile. “And how about you and—”

“We're doing well, thank you,” he stops her, knowing well who she meant. “Worry about your own… I just don't want you to get hurt because you're keeping it to yourself… Go to him. Don’t think about it too much.”

And as he leaves her with an assuring smile, Kotone does. She takes a deep breath, maintaining her cool and shaking her worries and doubts to the side the closer she reaches the gap between Myungsoo and Yooyeon, even as they exchange laughter.

“Look who finally showed up… Koto-chan!”

= = =

It’s now an hour past midnight, inside the gymnasium, and only a few alumni and other guests have been hanging out, as they exit the hall and, on their way out, thank the ones who are still present there, the committee themselves, the two of whom are Kotone and Myungsoo. They’re now fixing everyone else’s mess, yet they do it with smiles radiating with contentment with the memories they made.

“I know the staff will be dealing with most of these in the morning, but I’d rather fix the mess we’ve made here.” Kotone places another chair on the fifth stack. “At least most of them. Wow, this is no joke.”

“Let me help you with that,” offers Myungsoo. “You’ve done a lot for tonight, you know.”

The woman has had the urge to ask him about what she saw earlier. It can just be a friendly curiosity, right? Nothing scandalous about it.

“Thanks for helping me out, not just with this, But you know… With everything.”

“Hey, don't mention it, Tone-yah,” he taps her on the back. “I loved planning this whole event as much as you did, but you're basically the MVP who made this fantasy real from the start.”

“Nah,” she objects. “It would have remained a fantasy if it wasn't for you, Kim Ssaem. You’re the one who’s still here.”

“I guess, but who knew the class officers of 2025 would still be here like we used to?”

“Not everyone from our officers got to be here, if you remember things clearly, but I guess… It’s best that we focused on who came tonight. Cherished the moments with those in front of us,” she pondered.”

“That… That couldn’t be more true.”

“The nostalgia must have gotten into you tonight as well, Mister Treasurer.”

“I didn't even know how to count money that well.” He laughs and shakes his head at her callback. “I can't remember why I even accepted the class’ nomination in the first place.”

“I wasn’t there, but I thought you did your job just fine.”

“That's because you were there with me, Miss Auditor!”

“Not when you were around,” she shoots back. “I wasn’t even there until your last year.”

“You helped me regardless. Plus, you did well on your own after I graduated. Balancing the council funds and your thesis… Now, everything paid off for you, Tone-chan.”

“Hey, at least you’re loving your job. Loyalty can get you somewhere, after all.”

“You don’t?” he queried. “You get paid like six digits for about half a year, if not more! You’re just as loyal to ModHaus as I am to our alma mater.”

“Well… That’s one thing I love about my job. I just wish I’d get to do other stuff, like I did planning this event, you know? Not that I wanna be an intern again or something, but it’d be nice to branch out to another department… It’s been a long time.”

“Have you ever considered applying for other positions in your company?” he suggested. “I doubt they wouldn't want to take your expertise for granted, because in the past three months, you’ve shown them what you’re capable of… You’re a woman of many talents, Tone.”

Dugeun. “You flatter so much, Myungsoo-oppa…”

“Yeah, but that wasn't a lie, was it?”

“Whatever. I am considering reaching out to the Event Management Team. Happy?” she spills to him. “They’re the ones who planned and executed the last ModHaus Gala, and, believe it or not, that inspired me to do this whole shebang.”

With that, some things start to make sense to Myungsoo. “They'll be lucky to have you.”

Unbeknownst to Kotone, her cheeks start to blush. “You and your words again, oppa!”

“I swear those are just my observations.”

= = =

June 2031.

Even after the reunion, the two still hang out. Kotone and Myungsoo still keep in touch, as the latter first suggested, even if they meet less this time. Around two to three times a week, they’d hang out after work with their mutual friends. Other times, it’s just the two of them, which is nothing new, much like tonight.

“Look who just got promoted?” is how she breaks the ice to him during this meetup.

“Seolma… That’s great!” By instinct, excitement fuels him to take her hands while the pitch of his voice goes up. “Chukahaeyo!”

His hand holding on to hers is evoking something strange, but not unfamiliar. Their eyes lock in silence with no exchange of banters, as they both get a feeling of déjà vu. However, such a moment doesn’t fill her mind with expectation, a juxtaposition with how heart is behaving in his presence. Kotone notices everyone else at the cafe giving them different looks, something that doesn’t seem to faze the man in front of him. The man whose eyes are only focused on her. Embarrassment is not what her mind has been warning her. Rather, it’s the same old hindrance that’s holding her back. All those years.

“You can let go now, Myungsoo-oppa,” she tells him, yet she keeps holding on to them.

He senses the discomfort in her voice. Perhaps, that’s not the right word, yet it’s abrupt for him and strange, even for himself. “Oh, right… Mianhae.” He parts from the woman, taking a few steps away from her.

“No, it's okay,” she fixes her hair, placing scattered strands to the side. “You just took me by surprise, that’s all. You were a bit too excited. And it’s my promotion, too,” she tries to lighten up the mood once again.

“Well, it's a big achievement for you,” he defends. “How can I not be happy for you?”

“Gomawo, oppa.”

= = =

Three weeks have passed. Tonight feels different, but maybe that’s just what Myungsoo feels, based on his observation. They feel a bit more distant. Strangely enough, the fact that they're inside a pojangmacha makes him more attentive towards her. It must be the limited space. Or that her cheeks are slowly blushing right after taking down her fourteenth shot of the night.

She’s quieter than usual, he notices her staring into a blank space. “You alright? Or are you gonna rant about it? Hey, you better not be regretting your promotion or something, because you very much deserved that position.”

“Oppa…” she turns to him, ignoring his active concerns and speculation, as one question has been lingering on her mind. “What are we?”

He turns to her without a word, keeping his mouth from opening agape. His reaction is delayed, like a system lagging due to the overloading of data. If he had taken a sip of his shot before that, he would’ve spilled his drink. “Huh? What do you mean, Tone? Your question’s a bit too vague…”

Just like their relationship. Kotone takes a deeper breath than before. Instead of facing him head on, her eyes gaze at a distance, wistful at her thoughts and reminiscing of her past. “Yeah... I know that’s such a cliche thing to say… But, I’ve been thinking of it for a while... That damn question… But then again, you’re not a philosophy professor.”

“If that’s what you mean, uhh, then…” he stammers, hoping that playing along will help him understand what she's talking about. “We’re friends. We’ve always been, aren’t we?”

She feels a clenching and numbing sensation in her chest. It’s temporary, but she knows why she’s feeling like this. To hear that phrase over and over again. It’s exhausting.

“Yeah,” she affirms. “Don’t mind me. I know it’s already been months since the reunion, but I’m just taking us down memory lane. What happened after graduation. It just got me thinking, how, the last time we met, you were also with Yooyeon-unnie. My close friend and fellow Diamond Dreamer.”

“Tone-yah.” He feels discomfort, even from her, since all she’s doing is bringing up his own dating life. Yet, he finds it strange that he himself doesn’t want her to tell all these details. But his mind reminds him of their encounter at the reunion. When she walked up to him and Yooyen. “Where are you going with this?”

“No, no, I’m not jealous or anything,” she slowly rubs the side of her neck. “I was happy for you guys... But now that we’re on this route, I’m just wondering how she’s doing.”

Jealous? Myungsoo’s mind repeats it. He’s not entirely convinced by her words, but he doesn’t want to worsen this moment. He just wants Kotone around. Talk things out in this new perspective, even if it makes him, or even her, uncomfortable. “I mean, with what I know, she’s been doing well now. Always a beloved professor to her classes.”

“Are you not beloved by your students?”

“Well, I had my ups and downs… And—” He realizes Tone’s move. She's trying to change the subject and beating around the bush. “Wait… You’ve caught up with Yooyeon at the reunion, haven't you? Along with your fellow clubmates. She mentioned that. And you walked to us.”

“Ah…” She's running out of ramblings. Out of excuses. “We have, and she looks just as stunning as I last saw her. And most of the members were there, too. Jiwoo. Chaeyeon. Nakyoung-unnie. Everyone had a glow-up. They evolved. They were still so beautiful.”

And so are you. He can’t speak it out, feeling a part of himself keep such words from leaving his mouth. It’s usually not like this, and it’s bugging him.

“I love Yooyeon-unnie. She was always like a sister to me... But after finding out how successful she’s been, how all of them have been, even I knew that I couldn’t have compared to her in a lot of ways—”

“Don’t say that.” He didn’t know what just came to him, but he could only feel his heart constricting, hearing the woman compare herself to his old flame. Her own best friend. Deep down, he knows it’s not all of the sudden. “You’re saying nonsense now. Yooyeon and you are different. Don’t compare yourself to her, or anyone.”

She looks at him, her eyes a veil to various emotions. Disdain. Inferiority. Regret. Determination. Bitterness. Reassurance. False hope. “So how did you see me then, Myungsoo?”

He gulps down his own nervousness, hoping that her words in the past few minutes are simply the result of her less sober state. But he finally gets her to speak out. “Tone-yah. You must already be—”

“Drunk?” she scoffs, knowing him well. Quite too well. “I don’t know. I guess, we’ve had too many of those then. We’ve had this kind of talk too many times for me not to forget. You should know by now that this second bottle doesn’t faze me one bit…”

“Are you sure about that? Because it seems like—”

“I like you, oppa.”

He’s finally at a loss of words, but she still looks at him dead in the eye.

“All those years, I've been idiotic. I'm idiotic right now, too… Just risking our friendship for something I'm not even sure will go anywhere.”

Defeated and dumbfounded by his failure to realize it beforehand, he can only look down while she takes her fifteenth shot.

“I thought that making the reunion would make things like they used to,” she adds. “I mean for a night, it did… And I was so happy about that. I was overjoyed that I didn’t disappoint anyone who made it. Or myself. I mean I did get a promotion after that.”

She pours the last ounce of her bottle, before taking her sixteenth shot without pause. “And then I saw you and Yooyeon together. I know I was happy for you two back then. But, b-but I don't know how else to say it… Seeing you that night. It… It still hurts.”

He feels his heart sink deeper. “Kotone,” Myungsoo wants to say anything else, but he keeps his gaze at her. Amidst her words, he himself is paralyzed in this dilemma. He wants to open his mouth, but she continues her somber, tipsy confession.

She wants to cry. It’s what they usually do in dramas, but weirdly enough, there are no tears left for her tonight. The pang is there, burning through her raging heart with every word she mutters. But she won’t stop until she’s left it all out of her system. “And I know that you’re no longer together, but my stupid brain kept thinking that there could still be a slight chance… So I went up and ruined your moment.”

“You didn’t ruin anything,” he mumbles back.

“On second thought…” she wheezes, unable to defend her own face of smugness to him, even though he defended her. “Maybe I’ll regret this tomorrow. I’m sorry I wasted your time tonight.”

Slowly, he reaches his hand going to her shoulders, but her eyes catch it from the side. “Don't do anything you'll regret, oppa. Just because you feel bad for me.”

“Then I’ll regret it with you.” Myungsoo raises his bottle. Kotone wants to feel touched, but in her mind, she’s sensed this pattern that’s been irking her in the past few months since they’ve caught up. A pattern that lasted years. His willingness and enthusiasm to hang out with her whenever she invites him, without any question. His long ‘ride or die’ mentality whenever she’s on her low point or even when it’s the silliest of hypotheticals, like now. I know what you’re feeling, but don’t get your hopes up… That’s just how he’s been to you. You’re a close friend. His best girl friend. “Or not at all.”

= = =

“Hnggghhh… Huh..?” Despite feeling the irritating, inconvenient weight of her eye bags, as well as the unpleasant sensation of her parched throat, she opens them to find herself staring at a white ceiling.

Kotone wakes up on the snuggly surface of a bed that she has never lied on in her life, wrapped under a blanket. Inside, she slowly takes a peek of her own body—inducing a sigh of relief with what she has found. Her eyes wander around the room. She hears the door creak while it slowly opens. Her eyes light up in panic but she immediately catches a glimpse of Myungsoo’s face and his waving left hand from the other side as he walks in the bedroom with a mug of coffee. Of course, it’s him. There’s no escaping from this one. She places a nearby pillow on her face, muffling herself as she groans into the cushion.

“Good morn—” he quickly backtracks his choice of words, sensing the not too welcoming atmosphere inside his own room. Not to mention her perplexed face, from her eye bags to her slouched posture, and how she just acted after seeing him. “Or is it not a ‘good morning’ for you? We’re in my place, by the way, if you’re confused.”

“I’ve had worse… But this is a pretty nice bed. Great pillow too,” Kotone puts her right palm on her face, inevitably letting out a groan while her memories just had to remind her of last night. “God, that was really embarrassing of me…”

Myungsoo approaches the bed, sitting beside her. “This will help,” he hands over the mug, which she politely accepts with a slight bow.

“Thanks…” She blows it gently, before her lips touch the latte, welcoming the balance of bitter, sweet, and slightly salty taste entering her palate. “This is, uh, this is really good.”

He can’t help but chuckle, hoping that his lighthearted approach will lighten her up. “It’s from my go-to cafe… It’s just a three-minute walk from here. They’re pretty cheap, too.”

The woman takes another sip of the coffee, wanting to disrupt the silence between them while he waits for her.

“And, as embarrassing as it is,” he continues. “I think it’s not that uncommon to have moments like those. I would’ve brought up more memories myself too… But I think… We still have to talk about something about last night. If that’s fine with you…”

It’s time, she realizes. She places the cup on the nightstand.

“I, uhh, get what you mean, oppa. And, umm… I still mean it,” she tells him up front. “Whatever how you feel, that’ll be your feelings. I just…” She sighs. This shouldn’t be that dramatic, girl, she tells herself. “Confessed my own… And, I can’t take it back.”

He exhaled through his pursed lips. “Why take it back?” he shoots back.

“What?” Befuddled by his blunt response, she doesn’t know how to answer him.

But for Myungsoo, his heart isn’t lying. Neither is hers. “I’ve seen you as a friend for a long time, Kotone. But that doesn’t mean I never saw you as anything more than that.”

“What do you mean, Myungsoo?”

“I wasn’t sure because of how you and I acted whenever we're together… Maybe I was giving you too many mixed messages, ‘cause I kept holding myself back. Perhaps I was just scared that we'd lose everything we had if I said—or did anything funny... And with what happened last night, you were… A lot braver than I am.”

She let out a chuckle. He is not that different. Even he had his own hesitations.

“And with Yooyeon… Even she was bothered at times.” His hand clenches into a fist. “About us being close friends... But I know now, that's not on her. It’s on me. You were never a problem. I was being stubborn against myself, and I ended up breaking people’s hearts. I broke your heart, Kotone. I'm sorry because of that.”

In spite of their fifty-centimeter distance, Kotone doesn’t hesitate to hold his hand. “Don't blame yourself for everything, oppa.”

“I know, but sometimes, I still do. But I shouldn't be scared. And you made me realize that, Kotone... I’ve always treasured our friendship for what it was, but I'll always care about you more than that. Whatever we may be… I don't regret this.”

Dugeun, dugeun. Dugeun dugeun.

“I know it’s stupid to say it nowadays, but I’ve always seen you as a woman.”

His explanation makes her chortle, but such a reaction can't mask her true feelings.

“Myungsoo-oppa…” She stares at the man straight in his eyes. Such a patient yet longing and welcoming gaze from him is something she never thought she would ever get to see. She stands from her seat. “Would you… like to go out with me?”

He chuckles at her more or less act of formality. Instead of answering her with words, Myungsoo stands up and takes a few steps forward towards her, walking past the thin curtains of their friendship, and wraps his arms around the woman he’s been longing to embrace for a time only his beating heart can tell. Kotone tightens his embrace, closing her eyes. Both can only have a laugh, listening to each other’s heartbeats as if they’re headphones for only one ear, or a vibration speaker. He inches away, wanting to see her face.

Just as he expected. Her looking down on the floor, trying to cover up her blushing cheeks. “Yah… Why are you staring at me now?”

“Well, it’s…” He wants to tell her. Tell her an observation that he’s never told her before. “You look so cute… So beautiful... Just like that night. I mean, you always were. I’m sorry if I never got to tell you… I’m sorry it took me so long.”

With her lips shut in wonder, Kotone can’t shoot back a witty quip or begin another banter. This time, only her blushing cheeks and heartbeat answer to his straightforward praise. Not a teardrop is willing to leave her eyes once more, as today, her sense of triumph overcomes any other emotion.

“I’m sorry it took me so long, too,” she musters up to him. That weight on her heart begins to lift up, and it’s the best feeling she’s felt since their reunion.

Despite seeing her joy through her wide smile, Myungsoo senses her hesitation to move closer. He cups her cheeks, warming it up with his hands. Slowly, he pulls Kotone into his lips and tilts his head to the right. Their eyes close at the same time. He savors the sweet and bitter taste of the coffee from her lips, as well as the traces of the grapefruit soju in her mouth, as well as the scent of the fruity perfume he’s given to her. She gets a taste of his menthol toothpaste and a whiff of his aqua cologne; her hands hold on to his sloped shoulders. Feeling her body, his hands move over to her waist.

Their lips part for a second, albeit only to tilt their heads in the opposite direction before resuming their moment and intensifying it by pulling him closer, allowing her hands to clasp around him so they can savor each other’s touch more and feel each other longer.

= = =

The next one will definitely be a smut… I really gotta start writing shorter fics, lol. In the meantime, I'll keep reading and reblogging amazing fics from amazing writers, which I'm sure you're familiar with. As always, thanks for the read. 'til next time!

[4sqadia-8anthen]

OOOO WE HAVE A BIG HOARDDDD

!! TW FOR ANIMAL BONES & INSECT MENTION !!

first off we hve our shrine of small plushies and dragons >:3

some of the hundreds of feathers we own, none bought, all either found ourself or given to us (THE CAMERA WOULDNT PICK IT UP RAHHHH)

or best skulls we own!! :DD from left to right: flattened snake (left of moose, got caught in hay baler and found at work), moose (cow), north american porcupine (under the moose), whitetail deer (doe), red fox (bought, bleached, badly glued teeth), coyote (male, blued together myself, named Toby), whitetail deer (buck, rodent chewed antlers away now it just has demon horn-like stubs), whitetail deer (buck, roof of mouth can separate) also some moose jaw bones behind on the right side (none of the 3 belong to the skull)

worn skull (center top, was left in the woods for 3 years before being brought in) jaw bones (upper right), deer ear (top left), unidentifiable skull (above ear), moose vertebrae (along lower shelf), nest (upper right), and a ton of rocks around! >:333 of what you cant see there is a small skull of a mouse that is less than a cm, a beaver skull, and some porcupine quills

our collection of rusty metal stuff found on the side of the road (except for the watch [found by river] and beads [found in school on floor])

our collection of old coins!! :D we even have one that goes back to the 1800s >:3 but we have a couple wheat pennies, some of those bison nickels and for some reason, we have bermuda coins, canadian coins, european coins, all that jazz

some stuff in here

in the jar? 2 cicadas, 2 bumble bees, and this STUPID FLY THAT LOOKS LIKE A BUMBLE BEE THAT GIVES US THE HEEBIE JEEBIES- >:|||

in the front you can see some discarded songbird eggshells

above those, a bit to the left, you can see some raw gypsum

in the little bowl that is barely visible (left) there are a bunch of cicada skins

to the right there are rocks and on top of the ricks you may be able to see some abandoned fishing lured that i found in another state

in the very back on the right, there is a large patterned rock, i thought it was BEAUTIFUL (i was doing nordic skiing practice so was running thru woods) couldnt leave it behind :( ran all the way back with a 5 lb rock in my arms 😭

LEFT TO RIGHT

flattened shells on the bottom

container of many small seashells

above it is some kind of cephalopod fossil

in the back in the rock is a lot of small shell fossils, very densely packed

a bit lower is some shells

between them is a green sea urchin, right under it is 2 starfish

all the way down you can see a dried up salamander

in the bottle beside it there is some shark teeth

in one of the even smaller bottles to the right (you cant see whats in it) there is a teeny tiny fully developed feather, about a half inch long

in the bag on the right there are many large bivalve shells

some pieces of the geodes I broke open (THEY LOOK WAY PRETTIER IN PERSON — THE ROOM WASNT BRIGHT ENOUGH AND WE WERE RUSHING) (AND NOOOOOOO THE BEDSHEETS GOT SO DIRTYYYY 😭)

and finally our highlighter hoard :PP (they are all nebs wives)

we just feel an instinctual urge to hoard things, mostly rocks, animal bones, and (not shown here) TONS of 4+ leaf clovers (we have over 200) we just must have it if it is of nature, we think autism takes part in it as well the bones also just interest us because of our interest in animals in general, so we just MUST keep anything we can learn about animals from >:333

i hope you enjoyed the hoardddd!! ^^

I am so curious about what fellow dragonkins hoard (for those who hoard, or have an urge to, obviously)

Like…I love to see dragonkins proud of their hoard, no matter what it is, I want to see your hoards, know about it, understand you better, see what your dragon brain and instincts decided to make you hoard

If any dragonkins (that hoard) come across this post, please tell me what you hoard I want to hear about it 😔

[pomegranatelifethis]

What If in the ‘Forgotten Princess’ x Robin Hood y/n ran away from home if you can call it that because like Robin Hood were they GOOD at it and made a team of lost or abused people who have talent but were left in the roast like them…

They disguised as a circus or like Yaelokre and they move from site to site and from town to town and they start slowly growing they know that y/n used to be a princess but they put it to getter that they were abused because they never hear about them and the scares and like y/n is nice and give them a home so they not fighting the head that feeds them

And the bats find out that they are dead and how and they are sad and stuff but one day they find out that their home was robbed by the gang (using y/n knowledge on the castle layout) and they found y/n circus/yaelokre and see them and when they follow them they found out they are Robin hood and they see them take away a girl that was being abused and take them back to camp

And they learn why they basically adopted a bunch of kids and adults because they were living in hate, hurt, and no good life and they took them away and trained them to rob and give to the poor and to play music or do what they love

But they get caught and arrows are pointed at them and offer weapons and when they are surrounded they say ‘I the dad/brother/sister of your leader’ and y/n look at them with filed eyes and not love they show to the team some of them step back just by that look and said ‘since when?..’ and then they knocked out and left on a road with no of the money to fables they had

If you do this thank you, I put a way to muck through into this and love your writing :)

The Princess Forgotten in the Dark

The palace was never your home. It never had been.

People avoided your gaze, servants who didn’t even know your name were treated as more important than you. You were supposed to be a princess. But in reality, you were nothing more than a ghost.

And one day, you ran.

Maybe out of hunger, maybe out of fear, or maybe just… because you wanted something to change.

But you wouldn’t have survived long on your own.

Just when you thought it was over, they found you.

Thieves.

But not the kind you expected. They weren’t bad people.

They were like you.

They took in the lost, the abandoned, the abused.

They had built their own little family.

And they took you in, too.

They fed you.

They gave you a name.

They gave you a purpose.

In time, you learned to be fast. To move quietly, to pick locks, to disappear without a trace.

But more importantly, you learned to save others.

No one had ever saved you, but now you could be the one to save them.

You raided slave markets, you stole from corrupt lords, you fed the hungry.

People began to call you a hero.

You were free.

Until one day, your past found you.

—

A heist went wrong.

You were surrounded. Arrows aimed at you.

And worse… Batfamily was there.

Bruce’s voice cut through the silence like a blade.

"I am your father."

Everyone turned to look at you.

You looked back at them.

But there was no recognition in your eyes.

You didn’t know them.

And you didn’t want to.

"Since when…?" someone whispered.

You didn’t answer.

Because you didn’t know.

Because it didn’t matter.

Because you weren’t that person anymore.

And then… darkness took you.

But even as you fell, you knew one thing.

You never wanted to go back.

Because your family was here, among the thieves.

And they never forgot you.

[raqi-marr]

About Affinification

I normally don't bother getting into quote-unquote "HDG Discourse", but I was recently falsely accused of doing so on anon on Ao3 (which was funny as fuck) so I figured why not take the opportunity to *actually* discoursepost, since this is a subject I have some pretty strong feelings on

My stance on affinification is it should be allowed & not discouraged. Right now it is allowed but heavily discouraged, and I think this is both unnecessary and unkind- particularly to members of the community who have affini headmates. I've seen some arguments about affinification being bad because it undermines the disability narrative at the heart of HDG, but, imo this is only true if you take a very limited view of the capacity in disabled people VS abled people.

Disabilities come in all shapes and size, ranging from things like being unable to walk and needing a wheelchair, to having autism in a world that isn't suited for autistic people (google 'social model of disability' if this doesn't make sense.) However, "disabled person" =/= "person who can't do anything at all", it just means "person who can not do/struggles to do some things."

I get that the general take here is "the affini are The System and disabled people are never part of The System", but disabled people are actually - very fucking occasionally - able to become part of the system.

The US has a non-zero amount of trans representatives and presumably at least some of those are disabled; likewise, I have no doubt there are disabled non-trans representatives that I'm not aware of.

I think, basically, affinification is fine if your character has to work for it in a story. It is true that yes, you cannot overcome physical disabilities irl- but it may well be possible in some cases to still do a job you wanted to do, or get a position you wanted to, with enough hard work anyway. I do recognise this is not always possible, but to be clear I'm approaching this from a mental disability perspective anyway because that's what HDG means to me personally, and things are a bit different there

To be clear, I fully acknowledge trans people/disabled people/other minorities should not need to work to get this kind of recognition. They do, though; that's how life currently is, and it's fine for people to want to explore that in HDG stories. It Takes Time is on some level about my self-insert wanting to fight to be accepted and seen as an equal by a bunch of people who are more able bodied than her, even if she isn't capabilistically their equal (or it will be when I get to that arc in 50 million years lmao).

The reason it's about that is that, as an autistic person who has spent their entire life being thought of as stupid, inept, and incapable by the people around me, but is not actually, my life has been all about fighting to get people to stop viewing me that way. This is also why ITT isn't an actual affinification story; I don't need my self-insert to physically become an affini to feel validated, I just want to be treated as equal to them in the ways that I care about (which is not in the ability to micromanage 50 vines at once.)

so yeah there's my 5 credits on affinification: basically I think you can write it without undermining the disability narrative if you do it properly. also I am not at all trying to say "disabled people should just work harder to get what they want" no one should have to work if they don't want to: I just so happen to be the type that naturally enjoys having responsibilities and being in charge of stuff and I would actually be okay being in the social role that the affini have within the compact (which I realise separates me from like 99% of hdg's reader demographic already lmao)

I am merely trying to acknowledge that some disabled people - such as myself - do willingly go down the torturous path to trying to at least sort of "fit in" in society, and having a way to represent that in HDG is good I think

[odd-chips]

Been wanting to make a chart about the designs for Cap'n and crew I had in mind when I made [the first comic], and finally got around to it! (This did make me tempted to distinguish Cap'n more, but she's supposed to be pretty standard so I probably won't hIOLKJDF)

And then a chart about their most hated moons/entities! (Explanations under the cut)

For all of them, I wanted at least one base game entity and one update entity! (The one they hate the most is in red)

Cap'n: The eyeless dog distaste is obvious with her "condition". The incident is also why she doesn't like Assurance. (She's got a hint of trauma)

They're also not a fan of old birds cause those things are LOUD and [they can't stand loud noises anymore]. This is ALSO why she doesn't like Embrion since it's full of those hoes hIOLKJDF

And I think before the incident, she didn't like hoarding bugs for very simple reasons: she doesn't like her stuff getting jacked. >:/!! They're easy enough to deal with, but my God.

Mav: He hates Bracken. Just genuinely SUCH a nuisance having to look behind himself constantly, and with how often they show up on Vow, that's a least fave moon.

The masked creep him the HELL out. Genuinely cannot stand them at ALL. She had an incident with one with a previous crew, and ever since, masked entities are on her shitlist for real. It's on SIGHT! 👊🏿💥!!

Skeets: As the designated tall person of the group, having to look UP at an entity unsettles her. That is a PEOPLE but it's NOT a people.

She also doesn't like nutcrackers/jesters because of them being facsimiles of children's toys and that's upsetting. :(

She doesn't care for March because the big lake in the middle makes her nervous. Maybe she can't swim? I didn't think that far ahead, haha.

Kid: You'll notice all of them are bugs. Because... [he can't stand bugs] hIOLKJFD (The butler was the WORST to find out about. He thought it was just ugly, not human skin full of hornets.)

The maneater is the worst of the bunch. Everyone thinks they're so cute, Skeets especially, but he knows that it's fucked up and evil.

And he dislikes Adamance for purely petty reasons: he gets so tired walking up and down the steep inclines with his tiny child legs HILKJFD

[nitttstdsdtoastd]

just saying guys, i never planned on you/don’t come a knocking would’ve makes much more sense with david than katherine *fixes glasses and raises index finger*

both scenarios at first are pretty common, so it wouldn’t really explain how any of the two would relate to inpoy/dcak. new people at the circulation center would be (i’m guessing) sure, a bit rare, but not entirely out of the ordinary, and they would be the usual bunch of orphans and runaways.

same with jack flirting with girls to sell a pape or two, or even have a short relationship/one time fling, as shown in the lyrics of inpoy/dcak: “girls are nice, once or twice, ‘til i find someone new.”

katherine has the classic “i’m-not-like-the-other-girls-because-i-don’t-like-the-main-character” trope which i guess sticks out to jack since ladies are supposed to be “polite” and stuff. but i highly doubt that katherine was the only girl to stand up to jack, that’s common sense. so would katherine stand out to him? yeah, it’s canon. but should she stand out to the point where she gets a whole song? …no.

davey has the same circumstance: standing out, but not to the point he should have his own song as to where jack sings about it. at least not yet.

right off the bat, davey seems like one of the stereotypical school boys who’d sneer at him for just being a newsie in general, the inside hand gesture of spitting on you hand before shaking it with someone, yelling out headlines all day, etc. davey immediately (accidentally probably, because this is livesies), proves his point, saying: “that’s disgusting”.

the only reason why jack got with davey (that sounds like they started dating lmao) in the first place is either: a. for his little brother as a marketing tactic, or b. he wants to help davey out because he is utterly embarrassing himself.

but unlike katherine who continues with absolutely roasting jack, davey softens up to him. davey compliments HIM after seeing his painting, despite the fact that he tried to downplay it all.

and so, i never planned on you/don’t come a knocking would’ve made more sense with davey than katherine since jack never actually thought that davey would break the schoolboy stereotype, and the usual routine of him being with girls (mostly, i believe because period typical homophobia and heteronormativity). also, if jack were to actually date a guy, he’d probably be the complete opposite of davey, being the usual rugged newsboy that would be selling with him.

in conclusion, davey and jack are soulmates and there should be an illegal production of newsies where jack sings i never planned on you/don’t come a knocking to him,

shaboom!!!!!!

[lissyneedstopissy]

tuna mayo ! miya osamu

chapter eight – unfortunate circumstances

wc 4176

MDNI.

if you'd like to join the taglist , please fill out this form !

tw: mentions of harassment, i made atsumu lowkey kinda stupid in this chapter bc i felt like it LMAO

12:42.

[bold is [y/n] , bold + italics is osamu]

“Hello?”

[Y/N] stared at her phone with an expression that one could describe as “disgusted.” She wasn’t disgusted at the all-too familiar contact she rang, yet instead, was disgusted at the fact that she and this specific man got into all sorts of problems with the internet.

“[Y/N], ya there?”

“I’m here.” She immediately answered, sitting up straight and disregarding her lazy position. [Y/N] began to think back to the moment where everything went wrong – moreso, where the initial problem was created, being Interference. If only you had declined to go out, like you regularly do.

“How’s yer day goin’ so far?” The man on the other end genuinely asked, yet, [Y/N] responded with a scoff.

“Osamu.”

“Yeah yeah, my b–”

“It’s literally my day off, and my fucking manager just texted me and told me to come in ASAP.” She paused for a second to regain her composure, then proceeded to continue. “They also… uh, want to hold a meeting. A meeting that includes you, Atsumu, and myself.”

In the background from the other end of the line, a bell being rung could be heard, signifying that someone has entered Onigiri Miya. Concentrating back to the call, Osamu sighed heavily. 

“I know, that’s why I told ya to call me. ‘Tsumu already texted me ‘bout it.”

You let out a small ‘fuck’ at his own mention of the blonde setter. Putting your phone on your lap, you leaned your head back. “What’re we gonna tell them?” You didn’t receive an immediate response from him, but when you did, you could tell there was a change in his tone.

“We should be open ‘bout our current relationship, y’know? Like, tell ‘Tsumu and whoever does the social media stuff ‘bout us.”

That was the worst idea you had heard in your life. 

“Oh, absolutely not. Maybe we can–”

“Are you serious?” Osamu questioned, cutting you off. Although you were both on a regular phone call, an unmistakable grimace was present on his face. “[Y/N], we were seen holdin’ hands. You do know that holdin’ hands is a thing that mainly couples do, right?”

A slight cringe on your face replaced the neutral expression that was previously there. You stayed silent, with multiple thoughts countering one another. It was previously mentioned before by you to Osamu, that you didn’t want to tell a bunch of people, especially Atsumu, about your relationship with him. Hinata, and most likely Sakusa, were the only ones who knew, and you were almost 100% confident that they weren’t going to tell anybody.

“I understand that, but I told you before that I don’t want to tell Atsumu.”

“[Y/N].” Osamu huffed. Annoyance, and slight impatience could be heard in his voice. “There’s basically no point in hidin’ it anymore. He can handle it, he’s a big boy.”

“Yeah, I understand that, I just– I don’t think he’ll be too happy that I got with his twin brother!”

“Okay, then I have a question for ya.” The man on the other line slightly paused. There was a bit of hesitation, before he spoke once more. 

“Do you intend on bein’ in an actual relationship with me, or are we just gonna be in a secret talkin’ stage forever?”

Grabbing your phone off your lap, you held it closer to your face, while rearranging your current position. “I do want to be in an actual relationship with you.” You confirmed, leaning forward, and bending your back. Your head facing downwards, suggesting a slumped appearance.

A small cough could be heard on the other line, in an attempt for Osamu to clear his voice. “Great, glad ta’ hear. So what’s the problem?”

“First off, your brother is a bum. With all due respect, he acts like a child during serious situations, and it’s annoying. Second off, it’s not just about Atsumu.” You sighed, moving your eyes from the phone screen to a neglected book shelf in your apartment. “It’s also about the general public. All the shit that’s on your brother is going to move to you, and frankly enough, I don’t want that to happen. It could be bad for your reputation.”

You were always a private person. Something about not having your life all out to the world was a wonderful way of living. Working for the MSBY Black Jackals was never not an option to you, as it was a great way to gain experience for any future working opportunities. Even though this isn’t the first time you were in a news article, this is a completely different situation, something you weren’t used to at all, and yet, you still felt that the world around you would remain calm if you took control. A part of your consciousness still felt guilty, though. Osamu wanted to express that the two of you were together, and you hate to admit it, but after much thought throughout the current phone call, it actually wasn’t a bad idea to help yourself publicly. What you said to him over the phone wasn’t false, though. If the truth that he was the one who punched that guy, Onigiri Miya could lose customers, and you didn’t want that at all. You knew how hard he worked to open his business. 

“Listen, if I was able to get Bokuto out of that one scandal where he was seen making out with Goshiki Tsutomu’s girlfriend, then I can get you out of this.”

“But–”

“No, I’ll see you at the meeting in an hour. Bye.”

click!

You believed that at this point, Atsumu must’ve realized that it was Osamu in the photos that went viral, and not him. You still haven’t received a confrontational text from him, though, which worried you a bit. 

As you put your phone back on the couch in the seat next to you, you rest your head in your hands, your mind immediately being impaled by a strong feeling of stress, combined with dread. Ultimately, this was your problem to deal with. Atsumu and Osamu don’t know how to deal with a situation like this, and in comparison to yourself, you didn’t know either, yet you were more capable.

It doesn’t seem like the time to point this out, but this was truly one of the best ways to get hands-on experience to potentially add to your resume.

Grabbing your phone, you speed-walked back to your bedroom, eyes immediately landing on your laptop, placed on your desk. There, you sat in your chair, and opened up a google doc, beginning to type out a statement to the best of your abilities with what little time you had. It didn’t seem to help that you were still hungover, but that was not your main concern. 

Getting this statement done was more important.

13:56.

The drive to work usually brought a sense of tranquility to you, yet all you could feel as you entered the parking lot for MSBY’s main facility was an extreme amount of unease, better described as anxiety. Exiting your car, and walking into the building went by as a blur, as you could only focus on this meeting, and all the potential outcomes, whether they’re positive, or negative. 

As the familiar voices of two men conversing came closer to ear shot, a change of pace in your breathing came about. 

‘Why am I getting nervous?’ You couldn’t help but wonder. Could it be that you weren’t ready for potential confrontation? Or was it the fact that you may or may not be getting laid off due to causing MSBY some trouble?

As the designated meeting door was open, you were met with immediate silence, and staring eyes from both of the Miya twins, who were sitting side by side, with Osamu, still in his work uniform, and Atsumu, in his training gear. Seeing the both of them sit at the farthest corner of the long, white table with eachother caused your heartbeat to quicken, yet thankfully, your managers weren't in the room yet. You move your feet to the side adjacent from theirs, setting your computer down.

“Why’re ya sittin’ there?” Atsumu asked, keeping his eyes on your now-sitting frame.

“Because.” A brief, immediate response left your mouth, without a single thought running through your mind.

“Because… what?” Now it was Osamu who spoke, countering your previous reply.

“Because, I don’t want to sit by either of you right now.”

“Why?” Atsumu questioned once more. You could feel the agitation in your system begin to rise, mainly due to the reasoning that he hasn’t realized he was being annoying.

All you felt like you could do was stare at the blonde man. Using the best of your ability to send a ‘death stare,’ was utterly useless. It was clear to anyone within a safe amount from you that you were mentally exhausted.

Atsumu’s question remained unanswered, as you slowly leaned your head into your hands, only being surrounded by your intrusive thoughts. Thoughts that contemplated how the meeting was going to go, thoughts that wondered what your relationship with both brothers was going to be, thoughts that were interrupted as Atsumu spoke up, once more.

“[Y/N], are you mad because we held hands last night?”

‘...What?’

It seemed almost automatic the way your hands slowly left your face and dropped to your side, revealing your jaw, which was already dropped. Your eyes widened in an absolute sheer amount of disbelief, blinking repeatedly.

It wasn’t until a moment later, when you shot up out of your chair, and yelled, “Did you actually just say that?!”

Both brothers across from you flinched simultaneously, not expecting your voice to raise. Atsumu didn’t seem to know why you were becoming upset, while Osamu understood almost immediately after seeing the look of terror on your face. He felt as if he had to say something… something to help you relax before you burst a blood vessel.

“[Y/N].” He spoke calmly, with caution.

“Osamu, did you hear what he just said?” You pointed sharply at the blonde man, while staring at the other. Yet, Atsumu looked confused for another reason.

“Since when were the both of ya on first name terms? I coulda’ sworn y’all only met twice…”

You and Osamu immediately locked eyes, the muscles in your jaw tensing, sitting plainly, as his mouth fell open. It felt like years as you and Osamu stared at one another, desperately trying to read each other’s thoughts about what’s happening at this very moment. Internally, you both came to the realization that Atsumu had not yet figured out that the male in the pictures spread around the internet wasn’t him, but his brother.

You’re not sure what came over you, but you threw your hands up, exasperated, eventually getting out of your seat, grabbing your computer, and walking to where Atsumu was sitting, settling your computer down in front of him. You opened your laptop with so much force that even Osamu thought you were about to break it. Clicking on a new page search in safari, you typed in “Miya Atsumu and [L/N] [F/N],” resulting in many guaranteed article results, including multiple versions of the infamous photo that was taken. After setting your sight on the first picture you saw, you immediately clicked on it, and shoved the computer closer to Atsumu.

He analyzed the photo for a couple seconds, and stared back at you with no hint of concern, or even dissatisfaction in his eyes.

A loud scoff was heard from you after you got a reaction you didn’t want, and although you wanted it to sound mean, it ended up turning into a fake laugh that had no way of being controlled. 

Finally calming yourself down, you gave this whole thing one more chance, not realizing what you were about to do at that moment.

“Okay, Atsumu.” You spoke gently, whilst pointing at the computer screen for a second, specifically at the male who was holding your hand in the picture. “Who is this man? I need you to think very hard about it.”

Atsumu broke his eyes away from yours, and moved his head closer to the screen, brows furrowing tightly, and face pinching as he squinted his eyes. He gazed at the screen for a moment more, before finally speaking up.

“Uhhhh, that’s m–”

“THAT’S OSAMU, YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHIT!”

Almost instantly, Atsumu grabbed the computer, putting the screen dangerously close to his face, with more hints of worry in his eyes. As you watched him scan the screen, that’s when you truly realized that you were so overcome with anger that you didn’t figure out what you were doing until now. Essentially, you fucked up. For the whole duration of you and Osamu being in a situationship, you were careful not to let Atsumu catch on, knowing you’d be in trouble. Atsumu wanted to go through your text messages because he was bored? Absolutely not. Atsumu wanted to look through your camera roll? Hell no. Atsumu texted you saying he was going to Onigiri Miya for a quick bite to eat, yet you were already there, eating? Not anymore!

Quietly, Atsumu put down the computer on the table in front of him, first looking at Osamu, who held a hand over his mouth for an unknown period of time, yet with a plain expression painting his face.

“‘Tsum–”

“Shhh.”

Finally, Atsumu glared at you as his few grew ashen, with that specific look on his face. The look you’ve been craving to see ever since the topic of holding hands has been brought up. The blonde’s mouth opened, yet nothing came out, causing guilt to finally flow all throughout your body.

“Are y’all in a relationship? Boyfriend and girlfriend?” He eventually asked, voice sounding as calm as ever.

In unison, both you and Osamu muttered out a small “no.” Atsumu’s expression lightened up in the slightest, straightening his body while remaining seated.

“Okay, so what’s the problem then?”

“We’re in a situationship.” Now, it was Osamu who began to try and explain things to his brother. “We’ve been talkin’ for ‘bout a month now, maybe a bit more.”

“And I didn’t want to tell you, honestly.” You spoke immediately after, hands clasping together as you pressed your lips together, forming a straight line.

“Ya didn’t wanna tell me, ‘cause you knew I’d be upset, right?”

“Uh…” A small cough left your mouth, in an attempt to feign your awkwardness. “Yes.”

Atsumu slowly nodded his head, looking away from you and now straight. Almost instantly, he slammed both of his hands down on the table in front of him, “Well, damn straight I’m gonna be upset!” He pointed one of his fingers directly at you, and continued. “It’s the fact that ya had the audacity to… what? Secretly meet up with ‘Samu behind my back?” He then proceeded to move his pointed finger from you to his brother, aiming it at his chest, and repeatedly jabbing it against him. “And you! [Y/N] was my friend first. This same shit happened in high school, and ya still didn’t even learn yer lesson!”

“Oh grow up, ‘Tsumu.” Osamu grabbed Atsumu’s hand with enough force to cause a few veins to bulge out of Osamu’s hand. “We’re all adults, and frankly enough, we all have a right ta’ choose who we want to like.”

Atsumu pulled his finger free from Osamu’s grasp, as his expression grew more irritated. “Obviously, asshole! But ya don’t understand – you coulda’ chose anybody to be with. There’s like, four billion other girls out there, yet ya chose [Y/N], my best friend!”

Before Osamu could speak up against his twin’s concern, you interjected.

“Atsumu,” you began, “We chose each other. We wanted to be with each other.” Your eyes quickly shifted to Osamu, thinking about the fact that you potentially just embarrassed yourself in front of him, only to be met with a gaze that held a warm intensity. A warm intensity that screamed the fact that he felt extreme affection towards you.

Shrugging, you spoke, “If you want to choose someone to blame completely, then it’s me. I basically initiated the whole thing between me and O–”

“No, ya didn’t.” Osamu quickly interjected. “I asked for yer number, and I’m pretty sure that’s what really kick started everythin’.”

“Y’all are really arguin’ about this right now?” Atsumu groaned, leaning back in his chair with a defeated look on his face. 

Before you and Osamu could reply back to him, defending yourselves, the meeting room door swung open, revealing Suzuki Dai, one of MSBY’s social media supervisors, who didn’t do the actual posting, but monitored everything. To your surprise, Okada Mayumi, one of MSBY’s main publicists, showed up as well. She usually worked with each player individually, and never in groups. 

As the three of you bowed slightly to show respect to your elders, Suzuki feigned a loud sigh, while taking his jacket off.

“Ah, [L/N]! I can’t even say I’m surprised to see you here. You’re just always doing something to negatively affect MSBY. And especially before we have a game coming up? Man…”

You felt your face turn hot, and pinch with resentment. You hated Suzuki, and for all the right reasons. Following his remark, you were about to speak up against him, offering to fight, yet Okada beat you to it, landing a hard slap on his back, catching all of you by surprise.

“Don’t be rude, you fool. She’s already most likely being impaled with negative remarks on social media, and that is way more than somebody can handle mentally. You don’t need to add to the fire!”

You quickly remembered why Okada was one of your favorite people to work with.

As you took your seat in the same place from earlier, adjacent from the Miya Twins, Okada and Suzuki took their seats at the heads of the table, facing the three of you equally.

“Right, so first order of business…” Okada began speaking as she and Suzuki both pulled out their computers, logging in to their accounts.

“What happened? Did Osamu actually have to punch somebody in the club?”

You were about to speak up, ready to tell them everything, but Atsumu beat you to it. “Wait, wait..” he started, waving both of his hands in front of himself. “How could ya tell it was ‘Samu, and not me?”

“Well, even though his back was to the camera in the ‘holding hands’ picture, you can tell it’s him, because of the difference in hair color. It’s obviously not you, Atsumu.”

“But–” He cut himself off, sporting a confused look on his face. “The lighting in the club makes him look like me, right?”

This time, Suzuki spoke. “It’s possible that that could be the reason why everybody thinks it was you who assaulted that guy, but unfortunately, a lot of people don’t use their heads nowadays. I’m not sure if you noticed, but a lot of fans have been responding back to posts from news sources talking about the whole ordeal, defending you.”

Atsumu’s lips formed into an ‘O’ shape, whilst staying mute. Was he really that dumb to the point where he couldn’t recognize himself in pictures? Apparently, that’s what he thought.

“Atsumu, you do know that it wasn’t you in the photo, right?” Suzuki asked, raising an eyebrow towards the blonde setter.

“Oh, yeah of cour–” “No.” You and Osamu answered simultaneously. 

Suzuki let out a quiet, yet irritated groan while slowly letting his face fall into the palm of his hand. As Atsumu felt his cheeks turn a light red hue in embarrassment, Okada quickly changed the subject of conversation back to the explanation of what truly happened. You quickly volunteered to tell the story, since it was mainly from your perspective. As all the eyes of the people in the room turned to you, with Okada preparing to type your statement, you inhaled through your nose as an attempt to calm yourself down, and speak with confidence.

“At around midnight, Osamu and I were dancing, and I mentioned that I had to use the bathroom. He offered to walk me there, but I said no. Basically, after I left the bathroom, this guy with botched blonde hair and a tongue piercing started flirting with me in the hallway. I obviously wasn’t interested, and even lied, and told him I had a boyfriend, but he still didn’t leave me alone. He ended up pinning me against the wall, because I guess there was nobody there to really say anything? But anyways, that’s where Osamu came in, and that’s why he punched the guy.”

All four people had different, yet similar reactions. Atsumu stared in horror, Suzuki blinked repeatedly trying to take it all in, Osamu’s gaze softened, filled with understanding, and Okada with a flicker of recognition crossing her eyes as she continued to type, eventually coming to a stop. “I’m sorry that happened to you, [L/N]. Are you all right?” She asked.

“Yes, I’m fine.”

“I hate to quickly go from one area of conversation to another, but if we got into communication with Night Time Interference, and asked for surveillance footage of all of that happening to you, would we be able to get it?” Okada questioned once more, a glimmer of hope in her eyes.

“Uh, yeah, I–I think so?” You answered hesitantly, looking to Osamu for an actual answer.

“Yeah, there’s cameras in that hallway.” He confirmed for you.

An approving hum left the older female, as she gave Suzuki an expecting look. “Would you mind getting into contact with them now, Suzuki?”

He nodded his head as a response, immediately getting out of his seat, and dialing a specific number as he left the meeting room in haste.

“Alright, now there’s one more main thing that needs to be addressed before we go over the details of what's going to happen in these next few days.”

All three of you turned your full attention to Okada as she clicked on unknown things on her computer. “Since [L/N] and Osamu were seen holding hands, does this mean the two of you are together? Romantically?” She finally focused her attention on both you, and the dark haired man, eyes flickering back and forth between you.

Together, you both answered with a “yeah.” 

“Okay. Established relationship?”

Once more, you both answered with a “no.”

“Were you holding hands because it was an act of romance, or for a different reason?”

“Uh, I think partially because I was stumbling, but the other part being romance? I think?” You replied, thinking about your hazy memories of that night.

The rest of the meeting went by quickly in a blur. 

To sum it up, Okada fulfilled her part, and ended up explaining that MSBY was going to release a statement mentioning the fact that it was indeed Osamu in the picture, and not Atsumu. If the situation called for it, the obtained video of you being constantly harassed would be posted and used as proof on Osamu’s part (which was okay by you). You eventually were able to show Okada your own written statement on MSBY’s part, which surprisingly to you, was approved by her, and would be used, with a few edits here and there. 

After things were cleared, the three of you were dismissed, and ready to head your separate ways with no words exchanged. Atsumu had to head back to practice, Osamu had to head back to work, and you? You believed it was time to finally reconnect with nature, and go for a walk after such a long day.

16:31.

No wonder it was scientifically proven that going for outdoor walks can boost an individual’s mood.

Although you had finished your walk about half an hour ago, you felt much more relaxed, as well as an increased amount of optimism. You weren’t exactly able to label yourself as carefree yet, though. Lingering thoughts of Atsumu and his feelings stuck with you, as you continued to think about how you betrayed him in a way you never thought you would. You weren’t sure what came over you in the moment you were sitting on the toilet, but you had decided it was necessary to apologize once more to your best friend.

You sighed in relief knowing Atsumu would continue to remain friends with you, but at what cost? You didn’t like the idea of him needing his space from you, but if it was what he needed to remain in his zone, especially before game day as it can become extremely stressful, then so be it. 

buzz!

You stared at your phone, seeing another text from Atsumu pop up. You intended to ignore it, as you wanted to finish using the bathroom, but surprisingly.

buzz!

buzz buzz!

buzz!

‘5 texts?’ You thought, ultimately deciding to open the messages.

author's notes !

𐙚 okay so [y/n] is not going to lose her job ... sigh

𐙚 i may or may not be uploading a chapter next week , all depending on my school schedule (FUCK exams i'm so dead)

𐙚 reblogs are always appreciated !

taglist: @reuka1 @enepsigosthelast @arwawawa2 @miruac @loveelylani @ohgodthevoices @pickuptruck01 @haechansbbg @nixily @origamipivo @arteful @luv-toruu @mizzmarmar @p4lli @amterasuu

(some tags weren't working!! im so sorry)

[trickstarbrave]

Why do you dislike a lot of the Nord stuff?

argggg okay fine i will talk about it again. bc i am absolutely certain i have discussed it before

for starters, i am from a family that is at least partially norwegian. i have a norwegian prayer in the kitchen from my great-great grandmother who visited and brought it back. i worship norse gods, and because of this read a lot of history papers and academic sources (because a lot of people will just Fucking Lie about this shit) to get a better understanding of my gods and various other spirits and religious systems that would have been in place in antiquity, as well as tracking how these folk stories have evolved.

but the nords. the nords are just terrible pop culture vikings by and large. they barely resemble any actual norse people, but its very clear they are based on that. and there is a lot of Bad implications of it, as well as it just not making any fucking sense.

a lot of the shitty violent pop culture viking bullshit is based heavily on conan the barbarian. which is weird because conan is not norse at all. why he became conflated with viking shit is beyond me, but i am not an expert on pulp fiction novels or bad 80's fantasy movies. perhaps it is because of the connotations of "barbarian" being given to northern europeans by the greeks (and i believe romans). maybe he is conflated with vikings in the novels or movies. idk.

"well why does that even matter? can't people take inspiration from old fantasy stories and give it a new spin?" it is a problem because of a few reasons.

a lot of these mythologized, false tales of "the great white viking warriors of the superior aryan race" were made up by nazis. crafted whole cloth by white supremacists and used to further fuel white supremacy in nazi germany and commit all the violence in the name of white supremacy. thats why old futhark runes were co-opted by them. thats why white supremacists today keep an iron grip on this false belief and aesthetics. you cannot divorce the "fantasy" story from the fact this "fantasy" was originally created in the name of furthering white supremacy.

we get a double dose of racism in that the "barbarian" aesthetic is just a bunch of non white "tribal" clothes and customs and aesthetics all shoved into a blender, pureed, and then poured all over white people. with a heavy dash of violence added on top, because why not conflate all "barbaric" cultures with warmongering and violence. the only reason pop culture "vikings" are exalted for this violence is because they are white. but other cultures get conflated with a hyper specific northern european raiding culture, and then are treated with violence because of it.

also, i find this kind of militant violence to be frankly fucking stupid and makes no god damn sense. vikings were a specific profession that existed in a specific period of time. most norse people were farmers, fucking obviously. but with this conflation of purely war mongering barbarians with nothing else to their culture besides war and violence means you get the majority of their people being people dying in war.

who is growing food? making clothes? crafting weapons? raising animals? spinning thread? doing the wood working on all these boats and houses? these things are the backbones of society, but are treated as an unimportant after thought or given no acknowledgement whatsoever. instead everyone is obsessed with fucking dying in battle it seems.

the esteemed halls of the dead in norse mythos were not the pinnacle of honor people were expected to strive for, but instead stories told to grieving families who couldn't even bury their loved ones properly, as taking a dead body back across the sea in a boat wasn't really feasible. but now those stories have become equated to the goals in life the norse people had the same way christians want to go to heaven. the norse people weren't even a culture that focused on the afterlife all that much! it was more so concerned with living a good life for the sake of having a good life. the afterlife most people went to would just be a continuation of their life on earth. but again, there is one big nord afterlife in TES, based on valhalla, where people strive to go to after death so they can be ready to fight a big battle with shor at the end of time.

the nord lore and pantheon is likewise irritating to me because i keep getting the vibe they are trying to fit the norse pantheon and stories into a very christian framework. kirkbride's work slightly less so but its instead trying to put the norse pantheon in a different framework, one i don't fully know. but when you know most of the moving parts of old norse religion, you begin to see that its quite difficult to rip parts out and shove it into something else and have it all work right.

so basically i think the nords are a confusing amalgamation of pop culture nonsense, christianity, and bullshit that is seeped in real world racism regardless of how much people want to just. not think about it. it annoys me at best and royally pisses me off at worst. even today there are still white supremacists eating skyrim slop up and racist skyrim content used to further radicalize people to white supremacist ideology. this wasnt even intentional on bethesda's part, but that doesn't mean its not painfully obvious.

[literallys-illiteracy]

Alchemy and the Magnum Opus in The Magnus Protocol/Archives:

So I was working on a project that was in essence a google doc where I go over a bunch of alchemy stuff that could be useful for others attempting to understand the Magnus Protocol, and then I realised I should probably post this month so here's that stuff early (some of it)

Magnum Opus:

Magnum Opus, also known as “The Work” and “The Great Work” is the process of which one would create “The Philosopher’s Stone” (Also known as The Work, The Great Work, Our Stone, The Magnum Opus, The Powder; The Tincture).

The Philosopher’s stone is best known for the concept of transmuting base metals such as Iron and Lead into Higher Metals such as Silver, Gold and Platinum.

The Stone would also bring us divine revelation, true knowledge, and eternal life, or so it was said. The Magnum Opus is too thought of as the process of personal and mental development and transmutation.

That’s right, transmuting your gender is indeed alchemy.

Glossary for the remainder of the section:

The stone/Philosopher’s stone: The stone itself Magnum Opus: The final product (The Stone). The Work/The Great Work: The process of creating The Stone. Our Matter/The Matter: The incomplete Stone in the process of The Work. 

The Stone itself was said to be created in several “stages”, traditionally and most well known in the Four primary ones, but there have also been groups of 12 and 14 steps to its creation.

The primary stages that exist are as follows:

Nigredo, meaning “Blackening”, typically used to refer to the decomposition of a body. In relation to alchemical recipes, it is seen as the breaking down of all ingredients into a single blackness, the degradation and “blackening” of the materials to their base.

Albedo, meaning “whiteness”, is the stage following Nigredo. After the decomposition of the ingredients into their singular base form(s), the matter is then separated (“cleansed”) into parts, the matter becoming white with the separation of impurities.

Citrinitas, meaning “Yellowness” is the process of bringing forth the inner though lesser aspects of the whole. One can understand the Yellowing to simply be a state in which Our Matter is ready to continue to the final stage of The Work; After the separation of the previous flaws it must be prepared once more unto a yellowed state.

Rubedo, or Iosis acts as the final stage of The Work, “The Reddening”. Iosis is best understood through its relation to Albedo: Once the impurities have been removed, there is a separation made; In this purification of the Matter we have separated a part of itself, the purity in Albedo exists due to its contrast with the removed Matter. In Iosis, the Matter is reintroduced to itself, the two opposites unifying and once again becoming the whole, base matter that was strived for.

Psychoanalysis and alchemy:

This subsection also contains a glossary:

Self: The entirety of one’s own person. Mind, ideas, consciousness, opinions and ideals; the entire unfiltered whole of both conscious and unconscious. 

Shadow: The aspects of one’s Self that they (either consciously or unconsciously) ignore; The Shadow is best understood as the traits that one does not wish to accept or dislikes about themself, the repressed and unwanted traits.

Persona: The mask that one presents to the outer world of their “Self” in order to create definite impressions and out of concern for what others surrounding them may think. The Persona is one’s method of hiding their deeper individuality and personhood, the means for one to maintain social relations. 

Anima/Animus: In the past used in reference to one’s soul, the Anima and Animus are a pair of Jungian archetypes. Anima and Animus are noted as the aspects of the opposite sex within one’s mind, though this is not the only interpretation; Anima and Animus are best understood as the bridges between the conscious and unconscious, informed by their opposite natures. It is more useful to treat it as all persons having both Anima and Animus, rather than simply one, as they are the contrasting nature to one’s outer mind, and reflective of their perception towards others.

Individuation: The process of recognition, integration, and understanding of the various aspects of one’s self to be identified as distinct as an individual such as the Anima/Animus, Shadow, id, Persona, and ego. 

Now, please permit me to talk about Psychology because I like doing so and it is somewhat relevant at the current moment.

The Work has in more recent times been applied to the concept of the self, most notably by Psychoanalyst Carl Jung, likening the Self to The Stone, and the process of individuation and ego development to The Great Work.

Nigredo remains as the concept of a decomposition, the breaking down of one’s complacent unawareness of their own Shadow, and of their Persona.

The first step is the mentioned disintegration of the Persona, the uncomfortability of being face to face with the world no longer wearing the mask that hides your self, able to see and display all of your traits.

This leads to the confrontation with one’s shadow, the uncomfortable nature of seeing one’s flaws and perceived negative traits as wholly theirs. In other words, this is a disintegration of an internal mask towards one’s own Shadow, the Persona no longer hides the self, neither does it the flaws.

Albedo continues from this point, the newfound recognition of the flaws in the “matter” that is the self able to be separated, purified; Unwanted and unuseful traits may be discarded, an overzealous mind, a reinforced perception of others, each able to be separated from the Matter that is the mind.

Citrinitas arises as a product of the attempted removal undergone in Albedo; through the wrestling and attempted removal of an aspect of your Self, through the lack of identification with this aspect, arises the Mana Personality archetype, an attempted balancing figure of greater presence than the Anima, akin to the ego that it attempts to manage various aspects within the conscious and unconscious self.

Through this removal of the distinction between the shadow and ego, comes the possibility of unification and thus solving one’s inner conflict. Iosis.

Definitions and distinctions between various forms arise due to their perceived separations; only a being that has been divided from the chaos it started as is able to rejoin.

In a past project, I discussed this as well, as am I going to when I release my project on The Magnus Archives in whole; In an attempt to only praise or see one aspect of the greater whole, it fragments. It does not break, but shatters, divisions not strictly ordered and each shard still a part of this wholeness in its separation. 

You must first identify differences in order to compare aspects, to state that all aspects of a concept exist as a single homogenous entity, lacking differentiation, removes your ability to discuss the concept as a whole. 

I mean, you could see them all as just one thing, I guess, but it would be pretty much meaningless, y’know, like… like trying to describe a… shirt by talking about the concept of colour.

The Magnus Archives:

I have tried to foreshadow as heavily as possible where I am going with this concept;

We know that the Magnus Protocol is centered around alchemy, and that the enti(ties) left the original universe at the ending of Magnus Archives.

We know in the last episode of Archives that:

The thing that was fear felt itself began to tear, to crack and fracture along a thousand unseen fault lines. It bled and warped and multiplied, and could no longer see itself as once it did. It could never be whole again.

It saw itself. It saw itself and could no longer recognise these disparate fragments as its own. It could not understand, the being that was fear, as primal and eternal a being it was, it could simply seek to know that it could be separated from these unwanted traits. 

The emergence of human minds, minds to think, minds to suffer and truly understand it. This is when fear fractured. 

After was a state of decay, of unwoven strands and cracked stone as the being separated, as it became aware of its natures.

Then was a state of separation, these splinters of reality wishing to separate, to no longer be what it was, to be distinct and “clean” from these opposing, unwanted ideas. 

In this state of disunity came forth the wisest among them, the only one that could truly see them all to be the same, while being another unwoven thread in what was once it. 

The spider wished to save its kin–Its-self–and guided each scattered fragment elsewhere. 

Black. White. Yellow.

Still incomplete, this Magnus Opus never fulfilled in the Archives, the spider to lead them to freedom. The spider to be seen nowhere so far in the Protocols.

[veliseraptor]

Do you have any favorite academic works about Tolkien? I once wrote a paper for school on the role of dreams in LotR, and had so much fun reading through other papers on the subject. I hadn’t realized just how much had been written about his work!

oh man anon. I have read...a lot of academic tolkien scholarship on account of writing my undergrad thesis on the silmarillion (and then read a bunch of extra stuff not about my specific thesis, just general scholarship). and I thought I remembered making an academic tolkien reader at some point in the past, so I went digging through my blog archives and there it is!

you can also peruse my article hoard which has a variety of pdfs for various subjects including a few articles on tolkien that may or may not be on that linked list (I haven't checked overlap).

I've read a couple books since that aren't on that list including some other verlyn flieger and one called Tolkien and Alterity that's an essay collection, but I wasn't overly impressed by either. it does look like there's a bunch of new scholarship (...new being...since 2015, why am I surprised, it's been 10 years) so I'm undoubtedly missing a lot of good shit, which I am presently in the process of digging up. already found one whole book (Tolkien, Race, and Racism in Middle-earth) that I'm going to track down. and need to get back to another one I had to return to my academic library and haven't found again.

[kowai-kabuki-tanuki]

"what if no one GETS it?"

Ok here's a tangent about writing: I often hear people hold up Miyazaki as an example of a filmmaker who doesn't constrain himself with "western" story structures/hero's journey formulas/beat sheets.

This is definitely true to some extent--he doesn't really ever write a screenplay, just goes straight to storyboards. He's a master of THEME and storytelling for sure...This is just me unpacking my thoughts about story structure and maybe I'm just superimposing a formula on him. Anyway.

Kiki's Delivery Service.

I think that a big chunk of the audience for this movie...y'know, kids...probably don't "get" a lot of the story. Even as an adult, I still feel like I'm always picking up different things when I watch it.

But I do think it follows a fairly direct arc? It's got an inciting incident, (she leaves home) rising action, (starts a delivery business/has adventures) but I think the last third(?) is where it gets interesting to me.

There's a pretty long section where she has a Crisis. She loses her powers and she has a whole dark night of the soul™️ where she doubts herself. She’s despondent, but when she goes to see the old women that she helped earlier and they give her a cake, that’s the turning point of the whole film?!

Even though Kiki’s struggled and she's depressed, these old women bake her a cake because they're grateful for her and they love her! It's not like some huge epic moment—but that's the thing that pushes Kiki into the finale. (WAH THIS SCENE SOMEHOW ALWAYS DESTORYS ME) Having been reminded that she’s made a positive impact on the world, Kiki musters her own inner strength and goes off and saves Tombo.

So in this quiet Crisis scene, Kiki completes her character arc. The Climax that follows (her flying again to save Tombo) is where she SHOWS how she's grown/changed through the story.

The Resolution™️ is everything after she catches him midair—she can fly again, she leaves her childhood uncertainties behind, (This is the stuff with Jjji—I love that she keeps him with her even if they can't talk anymore) and she writes to her family.

So...even if the movie sort of seems like a bunch of unconnected situations, I'd say that it actually follows a pretty clean structure?

Miyazaki doesn’t put in a blazing sign, or state the theme in a denouement. But it’s still there. (I feel like I never see other people talking about the scene with the cake?) So, yeah, some audience members will miss it and everyone has their own interpretations of his movies. But that’s ok! Not everyone has to leave the theater saying, “Kiki’s Delivery Service” is about x or “Spirited Away” means y.

As a writer, I worry that if I don’t make my point absolutely crystal clear, that I’ve failed to an extent. But I want to remind myself that a story can be opaque or vague or even confusing and still 100% land with the audience.

There’s value in theme and story arcs even if it goes unstated and even unnoticed in the final film. A person who watches Kiki, but doesn’t think it has a structure (with an antagonist and a protagonist goal) can still love the film. But ALSO, they DID receive the film’s message, even if they don’t yet (or ever) consciously understand it.

Creators don't have to bop their audiences over the head to make sure everyone “gets” what they are trying to do. It can still resonate. And, like, maybe the movie is better if it leaves some stuff up to interpretation.

[princess-glassred]

@cwcthzl sorry to @ you again but I thought of more hijinks for Stanley and Richie to get up to in the freaky friday au and i thought it'd be weird to dm em.

•Adorable montage of them teaching each other how to act more like they normally do.

•When Richie arrives for Stanley's fancy admissions dinner Donald and Andrea try to introduce him to the stuffy school dean very first thing, but Richie makes a bee line for the table, plops his ass down with a menu, and says "Yeah, yeah whatever- do you think they serve chicken nuggets here?".

•Richie tries to nervously push up his glasses but he forgets hes stan so he doesnt have glasses and accidentally pokes himself in the eye out of nowhere and causes a scene.

•"Sorry! Sorry! I guess I'm kinda.... just not myself today."

•Then when Donald and Andrea point out that the old guy sitting across from him is the dean Richie folds IMMEDIATELY. "Oh my god, Mr. School Dean sir, i am SO sorry- i didn't mean to sit down and not introduce myself to you and- oh no don't shake my hand, i forgot to wash my hands when i left the bathroom.... uhm i don't NORMALLY do that, i was just very excited to get out here and meet you so i... forgot.".

•Donald tries to goade Richie into talking about birds since he thinks that'll impress the dean Richie has to pretend like he gives a fuck about birds. The dean asks richie what his favorite bird is and richie freaks and says "pigeon.". "Pigeons? Just pigeons?". "Yeah well they poop on big city guys and i think that's pretty funny.".

•When the conversation turns to talking about numbers richies like. "Oh yeah, i love numbers, i love math, i'm good at calculating things. Did you know that 6 × 4 is 24? I'm serious, look it up if you don't believe me."

•At one point richie calls stans mom and dad "madre and padre" and they're so fucking confused.

•After the bomb of an admissions lunch richie feels terrible, so he wants to do something really nice for Stan. So he takes his allowance and goes shopping for stan some nice clothes, and NOT JUST CLOTHES RICHIE THINKS ARE NICE. He really does try to find stan something nice that fits his personality, but also gets stan out of his comfort zone! He wants him to look nice, not ridiculous.

•He also uses this as an oppertunity to wear some sunglasses because Richie's never actually gotten the chance to wear sunglasses. Prescription ones are too expensive, but now as stan he can flip em up like every stereotypical cool dude in the movies.

•When Stan sees his new look he's utterly horrified. Richie didn't even cut his hair or anything, he's just wearing sunglasses and some new clothes. When stan asks "what did you DO to me??" Richie just says "it's called color stanley, and you happen to look great in it. It's not the great depression anymore, we're allowed the luxury of dyes.".

•Stan also got his drivers license before Richie, because, lets face it, richie doesnt belong behind the wheel ever. So Richie gets to drive as Stan and stan is very upset by this.

•Richie also tries to slick stan's hair down with some gel but it just will NOT. STAY. SLICKED. DOWN. it's like stans medusa but instead of snakes he just had sentient locks of hair! It's like trying to wrap up an entire uncurled ball of yarn, it's impossible. The hair has a mind of it's own and it will not abide by what Richie thinks is cool.

•Richie also finds out that, despite stan being incredibly neat and detail orientated and tidy, there is one designated spot of Stan's room he keeps dirty, and that is a bed side table that's FILLED with just random junk stan can't bear to part with. Richie is utterly scandalized to know tidy ass stan has a hoarder drawer, and the stuff he hoardes isn't even really important stuff-- at least not at a first glance. He has a box of expired pasta, a case of broken hairtyes, a tape recorder with all the buttons fallen off and... a really ugly necklace richie made him when they were in second grade. It's got a bunch of tacky mismatched beads and it's so not Stanley's style, but... he didn't throw it out :,).

•Richie runs into Henry Bowers at one point (this is one of those no juniper hills aus) and he starts bullying him for being jewish and all richie can think while it's happening is. "Jeez, his jew jokes are way less funny than mine".

•Meanwhile Stan is confronted with his worst challenge yet: Hanging out in Richie's disgusting room. Eugghhh.

•Seriously the place is a jungle and it makes him long for when he woke up with blurry vision and couldn't see anything.

•Stan asks Maggie and Wentworth what's the cleanest spot in the whole house because "he cannot focus in such mess" and both very surprised. Richie's never talked like that before, and he has always been very insistent that he liked having his room a pig stye because it was easier to find everything. Now they see Richie walking around his room like he's manuevering through a mine field, but instead of land mines it's dirty underwear. Yuck!

•Also when they first woke up in each others bodies and were freaking each other out Stan accidentally stepped onto something wet and mushy feeling and, without even looking down, asked Richie. "Richie. What am i standing in right now? -_-". "Uhhhh, the pizza i had in here since fourth of July." "...." "...." "You should probably change your socks." "You're right Richie, which ones should i use? The ones that smell like sweat or the ones with black on the bottom? Oh you actually have a clean pair? Well my oh my the surprises never stop do they?".

•When he goes on his date with Connor he takes off Richie's glasses in an attempt to read the menu but ofc it just looks like blurry smudges. Stan just groans and says "Oh he's actually fucking blind- well this stinks.".

•Stanley forcing himself to like Connor goes pretty terribly. He could not give less of a crap about this dude, and the fact Connor has such a fuckin ego about himself makes it worse. Stan isn't someone who giggles and fusses over another person, especially not someone he doesn't like. Ofc he still loves his friends but he doesn't melt from flattery like Richie and he also has no interest in essentially being this dudes cheerleader. But he has to be Richie now, and Stanley's only frame of reference for him and Connors relationship is obsessively onesided cuteness from Richie. So alas... "Wow Connor. You're so... nice. Your arms are really... wow, and your teeth. They're so... clean. I can tell you brushed today.... tehee. -_-".

•When Stanley is hanging out with the rest of the losers he and Eddie have a disagreement about something really tiny and everyone's like "omg, here come the fireworks! Time for the to start squabbling!" and then they just don't. Stanley calmly gets out of the hammock and let's him have it, much to their sheer horror.

•Also when they are first getting used to each other's bodies Richie will not stop making ugly faces or doing weird poses at Stan to annoy him. He even does the robot at one point and Stan's mortified. There ain't shit he can do about it tho other than whine and complain, which isn't all too different from Stan normally.

•Bill is feeling down about random life troubles and he asks Stan if he can tell him a joke to cheer him up. Stan scratches the back of his neck and shuffles his feet all awkwardly, then settles on. "What did the bunny say to the other bunny? Don't be mad be hoppy. You see it's really funny because bunnies don't know how to talk.".

•Stan and Richie try to run back to the Jade of the Orient and talk to the lady that swapped their bodies, but when they get there multiple people are screaming at each other in chinese because they already know what happened and they're not happy. It's oddly reassuring to know SOMEONE is freaking out as much as they are, but Richie points out to stan that they're actually making fun of them while they do it. "Really Richie? I never knew you spoke mandarin." "I don't." "Then how do you know?" "Because that lady is cupping her hands around her eyes to make fun of my glasses and that other lady just straightened her posture to make fun of the way you stand." "...Oh." "Yeah..." "...Wait, am I crazy or are they immitating our voices too?" "-_- Yep.".

•Richie eats some fast food and Stan proceeds to have a heart attack over it.

•When Stan tries to tell his friends he's actually Stan and not Richie they all just laugh and assume it's another one of Richie's stupid bits. The more he doubles down the more the losers think he's just joking. Then when Stan tries to point out his vocabulary is totally different the losers are just like "yeah! Your impressions are getting so much better!".

•They try to switch back a number of ways, making a wish, prayer to multiple different types of god, deal with the devil, literally just running at each other and slamming their heads together. Nothing works.

[steddieunderdogfics]

Today is all about @dame-zoom-a-lot! In today’s Mod Spotlight, we’re highlighting Zoom and all that they do for this space!

Zoom is our new Challenge Monday person! They get Monday scheduled and help us find fics for all of our special rec days. They also help out with our behind the scenes tech and functionality, offering up new ways to make our processes more efficient.

Zooms (any) started reading English fics in March 2024 when BG3 Karlach put them in a chokehold. They got into Steddie when cuips_not_cute's blinking red light randomly showed up on their dash. One day, she had a really bad day at work and wrote a silly fic about Accountant Steve inspired by Wynnfryd's 'Steve H. Who works in Accounting', and wrote a bunch more since then. He also knits, makes fan art, and codes up tools to make fanfic writing a little easier. It mods for Steddie Underdog Fics and Stranger Things Fanwork Recs

Zoom is always ready to help! It's been a pleasure having them on our team. They're constantly thinking up new ways to improve both the blog and how we run it, which is always exciting! Having someone so eager to help out, someone who will go above and beyond what's asked of them, is a game changer for this space. I'm so glad they're able to help! - @oh-stars

As a part of our mod spotlight, Zoom's answered some questions from you all and our team! You can read them below.

Be sure to stay tuned for more recs and future mod spotlights in the future!

What are your favorite tropes to read?

It’s hard to say because I tend to go for authors rather than tropes. But if I had to choose, I’d say monsterfuckers or crack fics

What is your preferred way to read and find fics?

I prefer to read on my phone. I usually have a notes app open on the side so I can kind of live-blog as I read. Then when I’m done, I copy the entire thing (mostly snippets that I liked and what I thought about them) and paste that in the comment box. This does take a lot of mental bandwidth, so I re-read a lot. My most re-read fic is the a man after midnight series For finding fics… I get my short fics from stuff that people reblog (Thank you @spectrum-spectre for reblogging so many great fics). I find longer fics by reading the works of all the authors I like then following their bookmarks. I’ve also found some incredible fics and ships by beta-ing.

What’s your guilty pleasure trope?

Everything.

What makes a fic an instant yes for you to read?

If I like the summary, I’ll give anything at least a go.

What is your favorite thing about modding this page?

That it has such a strong foundation, and that I can clearly see that I’m doing something good. Stars did an amazing job setting up the basic flow of how we’re supposed to do things, and they’re also great at giving clear directions. I was honestly pretty worried about the workload at the beginning, but I think I spend maybe an hour or so, if that, doing all my work for Challenge Mondays. It’s so gratifying to see all the reblogs and reactions. This is the most supportive and active fandom I’ve had the pleasure to be in, and I think everyone’s willingness to highlight and rec each other’s work is a big part of that.

What drew you to Steddie?

The fanon. My first exposure to Steddie was from @cuips-not-cute’s Blinking Red Light. Then I just devoured all his other fics like Honeyed Affection and Blood is An Aphrodisiac. I found @lollaika’s The Agony of a Loving Gaze while looking for more stuff by cuip, and I just realized… that’s the fanon. It wasn’t just cuip. The boys being kind of unhinged and obsessed with each other. Steve doing the finger wave and twirling things around… I could go on for days, but yeah, definitely the fanon.

ANONYMOUS – Is there any older or lesser-known Steddie event from the past few years that you particularly love (if ongoing or recurring) or loved? Did you participate in any?

I’m new to the fandom (I only joined last July or so) so not really. But I’m participating in the Eddie Munson BB now and it’s been so much fun sprinting with folks.

@sidekick-hero - What makes a fanfic stand out for you?

Timing. I’m so new to fic reading and writing that if a fic introduces me to new tropes and ships, it’ll really sit with me. I already talked about Honeyed Affection and The Agony of A Loving Gaze. But there’s other fics. @runraerun’s Easy As 123 introduced me to Harringrove. @wynnyfryd’s Steve H, Who Works In Accounting inspired me to write my first fic. And @teddywesworl’s  Anemone finally got me to get rid of the stupid hangups I had about omegaverse. They really… I don’t even know the right word for how much these fics have done for me, to broaden how I see the world, what I feel like I’m allowed to enjoy. So yeah. I’ll always be grateful for them. 

@worldswcollide - What advice would you give to someone who is interested in becoming a mod in the future?

Just go for it! If you have the spare time, I’d recommend you learn the basics of Google Suites now, since Google search is turning into more and more of an utter shitshow D:

ANONYMOUS – If you make fanworks and/or daydream about Steddie, what inspires you?

For drawings, other fics. RunRaeRun has these really vivid, emotional visuals that inspired a lot of attempts, and a few actually finished stuff. AidaRonan (@aidaronan) has such detailed and gorgeous monster designs that gives me so much to work with. And I’ve been having a lot of fun drawing for FkinKindaGauche’s Mer verse. It’s so different from standard mers because there’s a lot more plant stuff going into it. For writing, life experiences. I’ve written about layoffs, getting ghosted by bots, doing taxes, etc. I didn’t always have a community to hold my hands through those experiences, so writing Steddie going through them, but together has been a lot of fun. Generative AI is crushing me right now, so I’m probably going to end up writing about that soon-ish.

ANONYMOUS – Do you participate in any other fannish activities, like making playlists, gif edits, fanart, podcasts, Pinterest boards, etc?

Not yet

@sidekick-hero – What motivates you to mod for steddieunderdogfics?

I need a lot of enrichment.

@worldswcollide – Are there skills you’ve learned as a mod that have helped you in your everyday life?

You can sort and filter google sheets as a view-only user using filtered views. I really should make a tutorial because it makes all the spreadsheets so much easier to use.

ANONYMOUS – Outside of Steddie, who is your favorite character in Stranger Things?

Whoever’s POV I’m writing at the moment.

ANONYMOUS – Have you had a particular favorite Challenge Monday or weekend theme so far (maybe because of the theme, the recs, or the engagement, or for some other reason)?

WIP fics with less than 30 comments. Comments are so motivating for writers and I’d be super proud if getting more attention on those fics inspired the authors to finish them.

@sidekick-hero – What do you like best about fandom?

The sincerity of it all. I’ve read some deliciously freaky shit. And they’ve all been written or drawn, or otherwise created only because the artist had a vision and wanted to share it. I also like that there’s a direct community. I write with other authors in the fandom. We cheer each other on and admire each others’ snippets, sketches, and eventually their work. If I comment, I’m pretty sure that the artist can see it and I hope it makes their day a little better, because they certainly improved mine.

@worldswcollide – If you absolutely HAD to choose—enemies to lovers or friends to lovers? (At least when it comes to Steddie)

For Steddie? Friends to lovers, absolutely. But I love the enemies to lovers dynamic for Harringrove. It really depends on the ship I guess. Speaking of, Ronance has such delicious enemies to lovers potential–the anguish of falling for a girl that accidentally tore out your Platonic Soulmate’s heart +_+

ANONYMOUS – For fun: What do you like to do on a rainy day?

I love rainy days. My dog is a bit reactive. So going on a nice little walk when there’s no one outside, and seeing her just relax is so fun.

ANONYMOUS – What inspired you to join the mod team?

The Writer’s Wednesdays. I learned a lot from reading the writer interviews, and I wanted to do whatever I could to help keep the blog going.

ANONYMOUS – How different is modding this space versus others you’ve modded?

I’m new to modding, so I don’t really have a good answer. I only mod this space and another stranger things fan art blog that I started because I was inspired by this blog. This space has a lot more structure and more events (Stars is fantastic I don’t know how they do it).

ANONYMOUS – You mentioned in your bio you like to code things to make writing easier, what sort of projects do you like to make?

I like doing quick and dirty projects that automates one simple task for me without needing to worry too much about maintainability or scalability and all the other fun stuff. I’m most proud of a text generator tool for Ao3 

ANONYMOUS – Outside of Steddie, what other ST fanfic tropes are your favorite?

Errr… I don’t really have a specific trope that I like for just Steddie. But creatures? The weirder, the more non-human, the better. I adore fics that feature the Upside Down more prominently, and as its own ecosystem. I think that’s the Dungeon Meshi girlie in me. Speaking of, y’all should go check out @fkinkindagauche’s PANDO

Today, all of our recs are from @dame-zoom-a-lot specifically! You can always see her recs on our Fic Fridays by checking our #mod zoom rec tag.